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As Izuku flew through the air, he suddenly felt a sharp pain at the base of his skull. Landing on a roof, he closed his eyes and waited for Danger Sense to guide him to his target.
Fortunately, he didn't have to wait long before his radio crackled to life.
"Jailbreaker is attacking a shelter to the south of you," The weary voice of Toshinori Yagi came through loud and clear. "It looks like the heroes are unable to hold him."
"Where's the shelter?" Izuku muttered to himself as he shoved aside his weariness. People needed him. He could find time to rest… later.
Seconds later he was off, racing through the rooftops as Danger Sense finally locked in on the target, guiding him closer and closer to his goal.
There!
On the streets below, he saw Jailbreaker, and his blood ran cold.
Muscular!
Brief flashbacks of his encounter in the forest came back, but with far too much ease, Izuku shoved them aside. No time to dwell on the past, a hero was going to die if he didn't help!
Leaping down, he felt One For All course through his limbs. Its energy coiled around him, a weapon begging to be unleashed on a target.
"SMASH!"
Like all of Izuku's dreams nowadays, it ended with the sound of a seal breaking and the hiss of air rushing into a tube. Feeling a bit lost and confused he was told this was common, and the effects would fade over time, but that was six months ago his eyes slowly regained focus as he stared at his small dorm room.
His eyes passed over the empty empty, not a single piece of All Might merchandise in sight – does All Might even exist in this world? blue walls until his eyes came to rest on his wooden desk, lined with notebooks. He remembered notebooks filled with notes about heroes and his classmates and couldn't help but note the bitter irony that he now had notebooks full of feelings, emotions, and memories as he tried to remember who he really was. Finally, his eyes came to rest on the small digital clock.
2:05 AM
With a weary sigh, Izuku closed his eyes and laid back down. A few moments later his eyes opened again as he recognized that with the adrenaline in his system; sleep was not going to return easily.
"Why did I have to have one of those dreams," Izuku complained as he stood up and shuffled over to the window. Looking up, he saw that it was a clear night sky, the stars bright and visible. "Maybe some fresh air will help…"
Izuku silently padded over to the door of his room and opened it. He then slipped on his shoes and exited the room.
As Izuku walked down the hallway, he couldn't help but see the nameplates of the others whom he shared a wing with. Iida Tenya, Shoto Todoroki, Katsuki Bakugo… Ochako Uraraka. Names of his classmates and friends, or so he thought.
Six months ago, he fought a battle against the greatest threat the world has ever known. He and his friends in class 1-A were thrown into a desperate fight against the most dangerous villains of Japan, pitted in a life-or-death fight where they would either overcome, or they would die.
Six months ago they discovered that it was all a lie.
That evening, while the world celebrated the defeat of All For One and the Paranormal Liberation Front, Izuku sat in the hospital. His body was broken and One For All extinguished in a desperate final gamble, but he survived. From the window of his room, he sat and watched the sun set, heralding the end of an era.
That was the first time he heard the sound of a tube opening, air rushing in to greet him as a researcher who looked far too much like Toshinori Yagi stood over a control panel. The man then went on to tell him the truth.
He, and twenty-three other students, were recruited into a special research program. It was a three-year program that was supposedly designed to replace their high school experience, and they had just finished the first year - a simulation of living in a virtual world. He assured Izuku that all of his injuries and memories were fake and that he was quite healthy.
Well, as healthy as he could be for having been trapped in a test tube for a year.
Now they were in the middle of the second year, where they were supposed to be 'deprogrammed,' where they described their experiences as the researchers helped them separate dreams from reality. Next year, they would be re-integrated into the world and given an education, before they were supposedly set to 'graduate' and be released with a healthy stipend.
Izuku wasn't sure any amount would be worth it.
As he reached the stairwell, Izuku placed his hand on the small scanner next to the door. While they were given free rein over most of the facility, their movements were still tracked. For their safety, the researchers claim, but Izuku wondered how much they actually cared about him and his "classmates."
He didn't have time to dwell on it as he heard a beep and a latch unlock. Shaking his head to clear it, Izuku pulled the door open and began to ascend to the roof.
It took far too long for Izuku to reach the roof. Partially winded, he impatiently placed his hand on the scanner and waited for the beep before he wrenched the door open. As it swung open, he felt the rush of cool evening air as it hit his face, waking him up more effectively than any splash of water. Feeling better, he stepped out onto the roof of the building and looked up.
"At least the stars are the same," Izuku said to no one in particular as he stared at the vast ocean of space above.
Unfortunately, his peaceful reverie was interrupted by another voice. "Who's–"
Izuku's head whipped around as he turned to face the other occupant on the roof, and he froze as he spotted her.
Ochako Uraraka.
"-there." The words fell flat out of the girl's lips as their eyes locked.
"Oh," Izuku deflated as he realized the roof was already occupied. "I… I didn't know anyone else was awake." He felt a chill run down his spine and shivered. "I'll…" He gestured lamely toward the doorway. "Leave you alone."
He quickly turned around and broke eye contact. Closing his eyes he let out a silent sigh. Ochako was one of the few people he really didn't want to see right now. Not because he didn't enjoy her company. No, the reason was quite the opposite.
Ochako was one of the few good things that came out of his year in the simulation, and he was terrified of hurting her. Of knowing that his feelings for her are fake. Implanted memories of a girl that didn't exist.
She deserved far better than the hollow echoes of love he felt for her.
"Deku, wait!"
Izuku froze at that nickname.
"I…" From behind him, he could hear the hesitation in the girl's voice. He slowly turned around and saw her standing, her arm outstretched towards him. "...I could use some company right now."
"Even if it's me?" Izuku asked hesitantly.
Ochako stared at him like he admitted that he really did have One For All. As he watched, a faint blush spread across her cheeks, its appearance reminding him of the permanent blush marks she sported inside the simulation. Clenching her fist, she nodded at him. "Especially if it's you."
Izuku gasped at the admission. Tension flowing out of him, he relaxed as he stared at her in the starlight. Physically, she wasn't the same girl he remembered from the simulation. As her blush faded he was reminded that out here she didn't sport permanent blush marks, nor were her fingertips capped in soft pink pads. Her soft curves were also replaced by the same too-thin appearance they all shared. But despite that, she was just as beautiful as he remembered.
"Okay."
Silently, Izuku shuffled over to the bench where Ochako had been sitting. She moved over to make space for him, and the two sat down as they looked up at the sky together. And his thoughts betrayed him, recalling their time in the simulation as if it was real.
Izuku was walking through Troy when he spotted Ochako out the window. Her back was to him as she overlooked the shattered town of Mustafu, and he couldn't help but wonder what she was thinking about. Looking down at his bags, he came to a decision. Shrugging them off, he set them to the side before he ran to the door, walking out to join her.
As he approached he saw her turn towards him, a smile as bright as the sun appearing as she realized who it was.
"Hey, Deku!"
"You couldn't sleep either?" Ochako finally asked, breaking Izuku out of the silence of his thoughts.
"No," Izuku shook his head. "I had one of those dreams again."
"Which fight?"
Izuku paused and looked up at the sky as he silently debated his answer. Finally, he decided that she deserved to know the truth, and opened his mouth.
"The 'Dark Hero' arc," Izuku said softly. "My battle with Muscular."
"For me, it was the attack on the forest camp," Ochako said softly. "I woke up to the feeling of Toga's needle piercing my leg."
"Mmm," Izuku replied softly. "Don't tell her that."
"I won't," Ochako replied. "When she broke down crying the first time I learned my lesson."
"Shimura's the same way," Izuku admitted.
"They really had it worse than us," Ochako agreed. "I… I wish there was some way to help them."
"Me too," Izuku closed his eyes and let out a soft sigh. "Even with the therapy and our weekly evening of games, it feels like…"
"They're gonna be carrying that year with them for the rest of their life," Ochako said. "Just like we will."
Her voice was so soft he wondered if it was his imagination, his desperate desire to have someone validate the feelings that he carried for these past six months. As his eyes traveled over to her, her face gave no indication of sadness, no hint of frustration.
How is she so strong? Izuku thought to himself.
I wish I was that strong.
Silence once again settled. But this time it felt suffocating. Izuku felt himself choking on the thick air, his throat full of words desperate to be released.
Words that would change everything if he dared to speak them.
So rather than risk opening that box, letting those terrible emotions loose, and burdening her with even more guilt and worry than she already had, he changed the topic.
"Bakugo and I. Umm…" Izuku rubbed the back of his head (a habit he still wasn't sure if it was his own or part of the implanted memories). "Things are getting better between us."
"I'm glad," Ochako turned toward him, and he swore he saw the ghost of a smile on her lips. "He's finally coming to terms with the fact that it was all a simulation?"
Izuku nodded and continued, his voice soft in the night air. "He, well… so many things made sense once we found out, you know?"
"I know," Ochako let out a giggle. But it felt forced, stilted. "He had too many things go right for him. That should have told us something was wrong, huh?"
"Yeah, I guess," Izuku tried to laugh, but it came out too high-pitched and sounded wrong to his ears. "Both dying and coming back because of his quirk was a little ridiculous."
"I guess they had to rush at the end," Ochako said, a grin splitting her lips.
Izuku felt his heart flutter as he felt a smile – a genuine smile – forming on his lips as he stared at her face, brighter than the morning sun. "They knew we wouldn't have time to think about that day and figure it out."
"Yep!"
The two shared a genuine laugh, the first one Izuku could remember in a long time before they let a silence settle over them again.
At first, it was comfortable, but far too soon for Izuku's liking he felt the same traitorous thoughts creeping in. He began a desperate search, wracking his brain to find something to distract himself. But Ochako spoke first.
"Why have you been avoiding me?"
Izuku felt his veins turn to ice at the question. Six simple words, and the last thing he wanted to hear. Maybe if he…? He felt sweat beading on the back of his neck as he continued to stare at the sky, but he felt Ochako's eyes on him. Patient, kind eyes that were waiting for an answer. Eyes that deserved better than him.
Letting out a long sigh, Izuku forced himself to look at the girl seated next to him. Just like before, there was no judgment, no fear behind those eyes. Simply… longing. Pain. Fear.
Does she… think she did something wrong?
Feeling acid pooling in his stomach, Izuku opened his mouth only to find his throat was dry. Closing it, he swallowed several times, trying to wet his mouth before he tried again.
"I'm sorry," The apology spilled out before anything else.
"Sorry doesn't explain why," Ochako said, a hint of frustration creeping into her voice.
"It's…" Izuku examined her features, every inch of her face seared into his memory. He could even close his eyes and superimpose her permanent blush marks if he wanted to. "...me." He admitted. "Every time I look at you I remember…"
…the two of us sitting in front of a campfire, your wild gestures as you talked about your childhood adventures in Nabari.
…our late nights breaking curfew, watching the stars together on the roof of Height's Alliance.
…the look of relief on your face as you helped me regain control of Blackwhip.
…how angelic you looked as you stood on the roof of UA, pleading with the crowds to let me stay.
"You're afraid of your memories," Ochako said quietly.
"Eh?!" Izuku exclaimed.
"I know how you feel," Ochako closed her eyes and sighed. "Because I am too."
"You– but! You're–"
Calm
Angelic
Perfect.
"I guess I just hid it better," Ochako let out a forced laugh.
Izuku gave the girl a broken smile. No matter how much he wanted to avoid it, he was going to have to tell her eventually. She deserved nothing less.
Taking a deep breath, he closed his eyes and counted to five before he forced himself to speak. "I think… I fell in love with you in there." His eyes snapped open at the sound of her gasp, and he saw her hands covering her mouth, her cheeks turning a bright red. Despite the heat on his cheeks, he continued. "Uravity, the hero who lifted up everyone around her. She… I don't think I would have survived without her help. Every time I look at you I see her and I– It's not fair to you. You're Ochako Uraraka, and you deserve someone who likes you for who you are, not for what these– these false memories tell me you are!"
I wish things were different. That I could be the one to help you.
Izuku stood up and turned away from the girl. Tilting his head skyward, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "I've been avoiding you because I've been scared. Scared of telling you that. Scared of hurting you. I'm sorry. You– you deserve better than this. Then me."
Izuku stood in silence, silently hoping, wishing that Ochako would get up and leave. That this would be the end of it, and then they could play their awkward game of not talking. He only had to survive eighteen more months, and then he'd never have to see her again. She'd be free, able to find someone who could truly love her, the way she deserved to be.
"Midoriya," Ochako said weakly from behind him. "Turn around."
Izuku felt his resolve wavering at the tone of her words, but he tried his hardest to pretend that he didn't hear her instructions.
"Deku, please!"
Hearing that name was like taking a sledgehammer to the crumbling facade. And that tone, pleading and desperate… Izuku spun around to see Ochako sitting there, and now it was his turn to gasp.
Her confidence was gone, replaced with fear and uncertainty. Right now, with her legs cradled in her arms and her head resting on her knees, she looked so small.
The look didn't suit her.
"Why…" Ochako asked as her eyes found his. "Why didn't you tell me sooner? Why… why did you make that decision without me? Didn't– don't my feelings matter at all to you?"
"Uraraka…" Izuku breathed.
"I…" Ochako swallowed, trying to stabilize her broken thoughts and words. "In that world, I fell in love with Deku. The boy who was so inspirational, who always found a way forward, a way to save everyone. But we were going to be heroes! We didn't have time for pesky things like love and romance. So I buried those feelings, deciding that admiring you from afar was enough." She let out a broken laugh. Although, to Izuku's ears, it sounded more like a sob. "That only made it worse." As if to emphasize her point, her eyes drifted down, staring at the bench beside her.
"Why… why are you telling me this?" Izuku asked hesitantly.
"Because!" Ochako's head jerked up, her eyes locking with his, and Izuku was forced to take a step back from the fire he saw in them. "I'm sick and tired of not being in control of my choices! Of other people deciding what's best for me! I…" She deflated, uncertainty clouding her eyes again as she looked away again. "I was hoping that you'd be different. After… after everything."
Izuku couldn't help but stare, his mouth partially open as he watched the first tear trace its way down her cheek. The second one was like a hot iron to his heart, knowing that this was his fault. The tears continued to fall, each one a silent accusation.
She deserves better.
His own words slapped him in the face, demanding that he do something.
And before he knew what was happening, like the hero Deku his feet moved on their own. He sat down next to Ochako and his arms shot out, wrapping around her shoulders as he pulled her to his side.
"I'm sor–" Izuku cut himself and shook his head. "No. Ochako… you're right," He felt her bony shoulder blades, so unlike the soft shoulders he remembered from their embraces in the simulation. "I've been acting just like the researchers who did that to us."
"Deku!" Ochako cried out as her arms snaked around Izuku's waist and held him tight. She buried her head in his shoulder and he could feel her shuddering in his arms.
"I'm here," Izuku assured her, his hand shifting as he began to rub circles in her back, the same way he remembered from the simulation.
I've always been here.
"Promise you'll listen to me?" Ochako asked weakly, her voice muffled by his thin pajamas.
Izuku looked down at the brunette hair, and he knew this was his last chance. If he was serious he could let her go, walk down those stairs, and lose Ochako forever. That's what he wanted, right? To let her have a life without him, without a constant reminder of this place, and a chance to find happiness.
Or he could take a leap of faith and hear her out.
Taking a deep breath, Izuku made his choice.
"Yes."
I know you'll catch me.
Ochako hummed, and Izuku swore he could hear her smiling. "Thank you." Pulling back slightly, she rubbed her puffy eyes and looked at him. "Deku I– in that final battle with Toga, I promised to her that I wouldn't bury my feelings anymore. When we found out the truth, we decided to keep that promise to each other, and it's helped us." She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, and when she opened them Izuku saw the shining life behind them had returned. "We've talked it over and thought about it and I… I'm not sure I want to let those feelings, those memories go."
"Uraraka!" Izuku recoiled, having forgotten he had his arm around the girl's shoulder and pulling her along with him. She let out an undignified squeak as she landed on top of him, sending the two crashing sideways onto the seat of the bench before they rolled off and landed on the ground.
Wincing, Izuku opened his eyes to see Ochako doing the same. As green met brown, he couldn't help but feel laughter bubbling up in his chest. Whether stress or relief, he wasn't sure, but soon the giggle escaped his lips, before erupting into a full laugh. Next to him, he heard Ochako follow suit, the two teenagers convulsing as they shared a moment of mirth.
"I– I'm kind of pathetic aren't I?" Izuku asked. "Going from the hero whose punches can change the weather to…" His eyes gestured downward. "Falling over because I'm startled."
"I'm pathetic too," Ochako let out a content sigh as she closed her eyes. "I was a goddess of gravity, that last day. And now I don't trust myself to take the stairs without holding the railing."
As the two calmed down Izuku once again stared at Ochako, content to lay on his side against the cold concrete. With her there, it didn't really feel that bad. "You… when you say you don't want to let those feelings go…?"
"I mean," Ochako closed her eyes and took a deep breath before she opened them again. "What happened to us was wrong. These years, that year. These false memories, we shouldn't have them. But they're gonna be with us the rest of our lives. And if that's the case… I don't want them to be all bad. I…" Ochako swallowed nervously. "Even if it wasn't you you in all of those memories we shared. A part of you was still Izuku Midoriya. The real Izuku Midoriya. And from everything I saw in there," She offered him a warm smile. "I'd like to meet him. And I think… maybe… I'll fall for him too."
"Even though I'm… even if my memories are just as fucked up?"
Ochako rolled her eyes. "Deku, if anything that's more of a reason to try. You're one of the few people on the planet that understand what I went through in there."
"I guess I never thought about it that way," Izuku admitted softly.
"Of course you didn't." Ochako let off a small giggle before she shivered. "Ok, this is too cold." She quickly scrambled to her feet before offering a hand to Izuku. "So what do you say? Want to see if you'll fall for Ochako Uraraka the same way you fell for Uravity?"
As Izuku looked upward, he saw Ochako, clad in her black-and-pink hero costume, her gauntlet strapped to her outstretched hand as she offered it to him. Looking down, he saw he was dressed in his own green-and-black costume.
She's right. Deku was always going to be a part of him. No matter how much therapy he was given, no matter how many journals he wrote, he was Deku and Deku was him.
So why not accept that?
Offering Uravity a brilliant smile, he reached out, his white-gloved hand taking hers as she kept her pinky outstretched, and pulled himself upright.
Just as quickly, the vision was gone, and he was once again Izuku Midoriya, a teenager as part of some mysterious experiment conducted by the mysterious Yuuei Group. And she was Ochako Uraraka, one of the few people in the world who knew what he went through. Truly knew.
Wordlessly, the two returned to the bench, their fingers adjusting themselves and weaving between each other as they sat back down. As their gaze returned to the stars, they leaned into each other, drawing much-needed support and warmth after that talk.
"I never got your answer, you know," Ochako said from beside him.
"Oh," Izuku replied lamely. His eyes darted down and he saw her sideways glance, a playful smile on her lips. "Do you…" He swallowed hesitantly. "If this never happened, do you think… we'd have found each other?"
"That's a strange way to say 'yes,'" Ochako giggled before she rested her head on his shoulder. "I'd like to think we would have."
"Me too."
18 months later
"Do you think our families will even remember us?" Tenko Shimura asked as he was hunched over the controller, his eyes laser-focused on the screen. "It's been three years! And that's not even touching the fact that we have these false memories overshadowing our real ones."
"Who cares," Himiko said as she took a moment to shoot him a sideways glance. "The Yuuei group has set us up for years!"
"You really don't want to find out, do you?" Ochako asked curiously as her own eyes narrowed in concentration, focused on the screen.
"After what they put me through?" Himiko scoffed. "Since I don't know what memories of my parents are real and what are fake, I'd rather pretend my real family is better, and everything else is those damned false memories."
"I can't wait to meet my mom," Izuku admitted. "I just… something tells me she'll be happy I'm back."
"Of course, she would," Tenko rolled his eyes before throwing his controller down. "Damn it, Uraraka!"
"Ha!" Ochako threw her own hands up triumphantly.
Himiko rolled her eyes at her best friend's antics before she turned her attention to Izuku. "But what if you're wrong?"
"Then we'll meet Ocha's parents, and if that doesn't work out…"
"We'll figure something out," Ochako said definitively.
"We will," Izuku agreed as he shot his girlfriend a soft smile. "Together."