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Chapter Text

The ceiling was green and the comforter was nearly too hot, sweat clung to his skin. He kicked off the comforter looking around. The early dawn light casted blue tints against the green walls making the room glow in a sickly hue.

He… didn’t know where he was. The large room spread out before him and he heard the soft breathing on his right. Lee blinked down at the two dark heads entwined in the large comforter. There was a man and a woman still fast asleep. They were older, likely around there 40’s now. He racked his mind for any memory of the two. A cold fear curdled his stomach. Backing up he inched away from the strange room. His back softly bumping into a table. A vase rattled and the woman’s warm brown eyes blinked open.

A large smile stretched over her mouth a fraction too wide for friendly, “Awake already Lee?”

Lee, yes that’s right. I’m Lee. His mind throbbed but Lee didn’t move he didn’t dare look away from the woman.

“Well?” the woman raised an eyebrow, “Won’t you wish your Aunt a good morning?”

That… doesn’t feel right?

Lee tongue felt like massive in his mouth, he swallowed thickly his eyes darting to the man who started to stir, “Good morning Aunt.”

“Joo Dee,” the man grumbled, “Go back to sleep.”

“Oh, get up you lug.” Aunt Joo Dee rolled her eyes smacking the man’s arm. She shot a warm look at Lee. Lee hands dug into the rug his breath catching in his throat. “Go get dressed for your work at the tea shop Lee.”

Lee didn’t move as Joo Dee sat up rolling up the futon. Blushing as she shot him a sharp look Lee hurried to his feet quickly stumbling to the dresser.

Lee worked his jaw listening to Joo Dee hum happily behind him. “Aunt Joo Dee?”

“Hm?”

Lee peered over his left shoulder. Her features where blurred, he couldn’t see her face clearly only the blurry green figure wandering around. His hand lifted to rub his eye when Joo Dee’s hand wrapped in his.

“Left chest.” The smile was back on Joo Dee’s face, “Let me know if you need anything more Lee. Your parents didn’t send you to Ba Sing Se with very much.”

Lee opened the chest looking down at the unfamiliar fabrics. Joo Dee reached over pulling out a uniform, “Here you are Lee.”

She tutted as he shrugged the uniform on her hands fussing with the ties and straightening the long apron, “If you need anything ever Lee. Your Uncle and I are more than happy to take you in after your parent’s tragic passing.”

Lee nodded cold washing over him. Joo Dee’s hands stayed on his shoulders she leaned down closer, “I know you’ve had a terribly traumatic experience, and you don’t remember things very well, but let me know. I’m here for you Lee.”

He felt his hair standing on end as her smile stretched back across her face, no, his aunt’s face. “You are safe here in Ba Sing Se. There is no war in Ba Sing Se.”

Lee blinked and he was outside in the cool morning air. The sun warming the stone around him. Joo Dee walked next to him holding his arm as she guided him down the street. His mind swirled and panic crawled back up this throat.

Yanking his arm Lee scrambled back. Joo Dee’s smile stretched across her face, “What is it nephew?”

He felt like he had been flung into the ice waters of the Northern Water Tribe, fear flooded him. “Who are you?” he snarled his stance shifting.

Joo Dee’s smile didn’t move, “Lee?”

“Where am I?” Lee bellowed. The walls of the street seemed to close in around him as the shadows slipped and shuffled against the ground. Shadows turned into men with clacking hands.

“Oh dear,” Joo Dee smiled her cheerful tone grating against Lee, and that’s not right either, Lee’s mind.

“Oh dear,” she smiled as the men came closer, “Not again.”

Lee jumped diving forward as hand grabbed his ankle. His head smacked hard against the ground his vision blurred.

“Zuko the Earth King has invited you to Lake Laogai”

Chapter Text

He blinked and started. The sun shimmered over head and the book in his lap tumbled to the ground. A woman’s voice tutted from beside him.

“Careful now Lee.”

She was an older woman, wrinkled across her face even with the smile stretched across her face. She turned to him handing back the book. “What an air head nephew I seem to have! Come let’s get some dinner.”

She stood up tugging on his arm. Lee looked around at the garden and the rosy sunlight shimmering through the tree branches. The woman, his Aunt wrapped her arm through his and he stumbled after her looking around. His throat closed up and he tried to probe for answers. He was in Ba Sing Se, after that a black void of hazy impressions.

He glanced at the woman, “Excuse me…?”

The woman, his Aunt raised an eyebrow, “Yes Lee?”

“I don’t…”

She sighed, “Your family warned me you were airheaded. Don’t you listen?  You’ll make your poor Aunt Joo Dee go gray before my time!”

Lee glanced around at the long shadows as Joo Dee tugged him down a street. Large fences bore down oppressively from either side. The green trees barely poking the tops of their head over the thick earth walls.

“I have a job for you at this new tea shop that just opened up.” Joo Dee said, “They are looking for new servers.”

Lee swallowed as one of the shadows moved wrong. His head snapped forward the hairs on the back of his neck prickling. The shadows felt like eyes he suppressed a shiver. Joo Dee tugged on his arm, “I’m just happy you’re settling in well. I know it’s a big change here in Ba Sing Se with your aunt but your safe now.”

“That’s,” he looked at Joo Dee, “I don’t know you.”

“Lee, the Earth King has invited you to Lake Laogai.”

Lee felt his knees wobble his eyes burned as a wave of nausea washed over him. He hiccupped hands flying to his mouth. He blinked.

His eyes opened to a green room and the smell of strange flowery perfume. Joo Dee placed down a title on a game bord. He looked down at the Pai Sho. His gut churned and his eyes were watery. He blinked away the tears shocked. A sharp pain in his hand had in unfurling his cramped hand. A white Lotus title was nested in his hand. The tiles of the tile now pressed into the flesh of his palm.

Cold sweat rolled down the back of his neck. Lee and that wasn’t quiet right either, swallowed. He sucked in a deep breath fixing his expression.

Joo Dee smile was back on her face. Lee glanced at the board. He picked up a red crane placing the tile down as he slipped the white lotus tile into his slipper.

If Joo Dee had noticed anything she didn’t show it. He remembered the garden, leaving and then nothing. A prickle of fear kept his back straight and the expression in his face mild. His mind left to fill in the gaps. Wandering the Earth Kingdom trying to go home to his aunt Joo Dee, arriving, and taking the train to the Upper Wall. Splotches of memories leapt to fill the games but the nausea was back. It… something was off.

Lee glanced around at the green walls. He felt when Joo Dee noticed his wandering eyes. His heart pounded in his chest.

“We should get a plant.” He spoke. “It would brighten the room up nicely.”

Joo Dee hummed and get a tile down, “That would be nice.”

Lee watched out of the corner of his eye. His ear strained listening to the pattern of her breathing. Her shoulders were slumped and eyes slipping to the paper on her lap. She wasn’t watching carefully.

Lee glanced around the room as if trying to place the best spot for a plant. His eyes slipped to the open windows. The balcony looked back from the inside. A shadow shifted.

Lee felt his throat tighten but he fought the feeling. Rocking forward he peered down at the Pai Sho table. He placed down a tile trying to stop his hand from shaking.

Joo Dee glanced up at the board. Her grin nearly seemed to slip as it strained like meat sagging on a rack, “You certain don’t play well for how much you wanted to play this game.”

Lee let the words wash over him. Glancing at the window he reconsidered. Calculating the sightlines and hidden corners he decided.

“What if we put a plant there?” he pointed to the window ledge in the middle.  

Joo Dee looked at where Lee was pointing. She smiled brighter, “We are getting a plant.”

It was subtle, he nearly didn’t catch it but his mind stuck to the tightness rolling down Joo Dee’s shoulders and his argument died in his throat. He swallowed it down shifting his weight. The tile in his slippers pressed against his foot like a warning. He held his tongue. The seconds slipped by and none of the shadows moved.

“What are you reading Aunt Joo Dee?”

Her eyes narrowed over the big smile. Lee schooled his expression carefully.

“Notes from work nephew.”

Lee bowed his head keeping his eyes down on the game. Out of the corner of his eye, Joo Dee tucked the notes away into her sleeves. He waited for the shadows to move. Clicking down a tile without any real thought, Joo Dee didn’t make any movement. Nothing came out of the shadows. Lee had passed that test too.

Joo Dee looked over the game and scoffed before the smile came back onto her face, “I’m afraid dear nephew you have lost the game.”

She clicked down a tile. Heart pounding Lee bowed brushing down his robes, “I’m tired.”

When nothing leapt from the shadows with clacking hands Lee hurried off into the next room quickly tugging off his robes. He looked through his chest counting each non descript piece of clothing. Reaching to the very bottom he pulled out a pair of baggy pants tugging those on. Placing his slippers close to his hands he crawled into the futon. He turned off the lantern and waited. Fear prickled the back of his mind at the thought of sleep. He blinked and held his breath staring up at the ceiling. It stayed in place after each blink.

Patting the floor, he tugged a slipper closer fingering the tile. His hand curled around the tile and he focused everything on feeling the smooth grain of the tile. The little indents of the lotus flower printed into the stone. His breathing evened out. He closed his eyes. He didn’t sleep but to anyone watch it would look like he was. All night long he brushed his hand against the tile and counted his breathing. The echo of a man’s voice ringing like a phantom in his head.

“I only nag because I worry about you nephew.”

No matter how he turned the voice over in his head, it didn’t sound like Joo Dee.

Chapter Text

Lee circled the apartment for the third time and there was still no mirror. With a huff he put the hair brush back down on the table glancing around the apartment again. Out of all the things to hide from Lee, it was the lack of mirrors that had him nearly steaming at the ears. He scoped around feeling stupider by the second.

In the corner of the room Lee side eyed Joo Dee as she brushed down her robes smoothing wrinkles. Her hands fluttered up brushing down the complicated bun.

It’s only a mirror.

But it wasn’t, and Lee didn’t know why. He knew something was off about his face, the skin over his left side felt rough under his fingers, but the last time he tried to touch it he had blinked and woken up somewhere else. Which was why it was so wildly unfair.

Lee weighed the costs, decided he didn’t care. It was the principle of the thing.

He had been here in this awful apartment for the past three days (that he could remember). A neat little bundle of times that he blinked and wasn’t where he last remembers. Between Joo Dee’s smile and the moving shadows he wasn’t surprised, he was even keeping quiet.

Turns out he’s awful at keeping quiet.

“Aunt Joo Dee,” aunt only because Lee found it was less likely to get the shadows inching closer, “Where is a mirror?”

“You don’t need one.” Joo Dee said. The tone offered no argument.

Lee found an argument. “I want to comb my hair.”

“You don’t need a mirror for that.”

“Yes, I do!” Lee shouted. His throat tightened as the shadows started to move. His hand brush shifted in his grip.

Joo Dee gave a tired sigh through her grin, “Why do you need a mirror?”

Lee’s mind whirled for an excuse, “There’s someone I wanted to ask out. I want to look nice.”

“I’m sorry Lee.” Joo Dee sounded sad but the smile stayed on, “We don’t have a mirror.”

Lee eyed her hair nodding, “Fine. I’ll see you later.”

Joo Dee smiled tighten around her eyes and Lee felt his stomach follow in near harmony. Thinly veiled anger seeped into her tone, “Have a good day nephew.”

Lee hurried out of the apartment before she could change her mind about his behaviour. Three days, and he had no leads. He needed an escape plan. He could get away from Joo Dee, that wouldn’t be hard. It was the clacking shadows that would be the real issue.

Lee eyed a shadow as he passed close, he could see the wisp of dark hair and grim set eyes following him as he passed before it slipped away and disappeared.

He could take these guys… probably.

And then what nephew, where will you go afterward? You must think these things through!

Lee feet stutter to a stop as a familiar smell filled his nose. He looked over at a couple of steps where a soldier was oiling the leather of a sword handle. Inching close the soldier looked sharply up at Lee his face twisting into a scowl.

“Keep moving kid.”

“You’re wrapping that sword wrong.” Lee said. He started.

How do I know that?

“Oh yeah?” the soldier shifted the swords to the side as he started to stand up, “Think you can do a better job kid?”

“I’m not a kid.” Then Lee’s brain caught up with the rest of his ‘morning’ routine.

Reflective surface, he would be able to see himself, maybe then he would know what Joo Dee was trying to hide from him.

A bubble of excitement bubbled up, “Give me the sword and I’ll show you.”

That came out maybe a little too hasty. His shoulder tensed as a bush rustled behind him on his left. 

The way the soldier’s eyes flickered then snapped back to Lee’s completely.

The Soldier’s didn’t look away staring down Lee. Lee was starting to bristle when the soldier whisphered, “the Dai Li are here.”

Who are the Dai Li

The soldier’s brow started to sweat much louder now he said, “You’re too young to hold a sword.”

His boil roiled as his hands itched fiercely with the heat simmering just under his skin, “I’m not a kid! I know how to use a sword!”

The soldier’s eyes flickered over his shoulder and Lee felt his spine stiffen as a faint clacking came from behind him.

“I’m really sorry about this kid,” the soldier whispered.

Lee stared hard his breath caught in his throat. He whirled around. The shadows became men, men that Lee had a name for now.

In the day light the Dai Li were not nearly as menacing as in the shadows. They were men with rocks gloves and long dark green collared tunics. Green straw hats only shadowed the faces. But they were men.

Lee braced his stance not daring to blink as the world wobbled uncertainty. The words crept over his mind but he shoved it back as fiercely as he could.

The Dai Li approached and then six men charged. Lee flinched as a rock gloved smacked into his temple. One blink.

Chapter Text

Lee wasn’t sure what was different.

The owner had given him a strange look when he walked into work for the day. Lee must have looked like a mess. He felt like a mess. 

He was sticky with old dried sweat and his hair was oily and matted against his skull. He felt exhausted down to the marrow of his bones, but his mind was all together too frazzled and too wired to keep anything together for very long.

The Owner, Liang, watched Lee stumble around the shop. His face was pulled into a nervous frown that he took out on his long braid pulled over his shoulder. His hands folded into the earth kingdom billowing sleeves eyes nervously flickering around the shop. He shuffled forward sliding up to Lee as Lee yanked his apron on.

“Lee?”

The apron didn’t hide how grubby his work uniform was. It’s so dusty, how did it get dusty? “I’m here for work. Sorry I’m late.”

Liang blinked and nodded slowly. He tugged again on his braid looking nervously at the door, “I see. Well then, I guess…”

Liang fluttered nervously around the hot plates. He kept staring at Lee. Unease curled up Lee’s spine. Tnese now he shoved his way into the small back room. The window was wide open letting in the hot late spring air. Lee stomped towards the shelf of tea leaves. Reaching up a flash of pain down his shoulder had a jar slipping from his fingers.

 Swearing, he reached for the broom leaning against the window sill. Lee froze. A cold fear washed over him and he looked up at the eyes of a Dai Li.

Spinning on his heel he marched back out the front. He didn’t feel tired anymore.

I have to get out of here. I need a plan. Joo dee would be easy enough to get around but what about the Dai Li?

An eery sense of déjà vu shivered through him. He couldn’t remember what had happened. He’d woken up in Joo Dee’s apartment said good bye and walked to work, she had seemed the same as the last 3 days. But then there was Liang who was shocked to see him again, and then there was the Dai Li watching openly from the window.

I lost time again.

He didn’t even remember what he did wrong this time. He poked his memory but nothing came back.

Lee pushed down his frustration keeping his spine stiff as he marched around the shop serving tea. Liang watched fretfully from behind his tea pots. The scowl fell naturally over Lee’s face. Fuming he stomped around never saying a word. Around him customers averted their gaze ducking there eyes low or back into there cups.

“Jasmine for table 9.” Lee snarled. “Green for table 3 and one pot of the hibiscus robus special for table 4.”

Liang tugged on his braid a few times.

“What?” Lee growled.

“Nothing.” Liang didn’t look at Lee.

“What the hell is wrong with all of you?” Lee snarled slamming his palm on the table. Liang jumped.

“What is it?”

“Nothing.”

Lee felt his hands itch as his temper rose. He felt like he had a fire roiling inside him, and all he had to do was open his mouth and scream and it would just blaze golden flames chomping and eating everything insight. His lip curled as his hands clenched the table.

“I know the Dai Li are watching me.” He hissed. Liang’s hands froze then he meticulously started back at his tea. Lee didn’t let up, “And I need you to be honest with me. What is wrong. Why were you surprised to see me? Tell me!”

He didn’t mean the near pleading tone his voice took on at the end by Liang was looking back at him. The worry melded into pity and Lee felt his blood boil. He couldn’t afford to shout, but it was a close thing. Liang looked around the shop casually, almost too casually he made it so obvious. Lee rolled his eyes.

Liang leaned forward under the pretense of inspecting his tea cups.

“You’ve been gone the last 2 days.” Liang whispered, “Three days ago you came to work and the Dai Li drag you off just outside, I didn’t think you would be back.”

Horror bore down like a flash ice encasing him. “Two days?” 

“Honestly, what did you do? I’ve never seen the Dai Li hound someone so much.”

“I… I don’t know.” Lee tried to swallow around the growing horror crawling up from his belly.

It was not a good thought. Lee was silent as he took the cups from Liang and passed them out to the customers. His mind felt numb as he hurried about the store. Finally, there was another lull. Lee hurried back to Liang.

“What else?” Lee whispered scanning the corners out of the corner of his eye, “What else?”

“I don’t know anything else.”

“I know Joo Dee isn’t my aunt.”

“Shut up.” Liang hissed and Lee’s mouth snapped closed, “Don’t ever say that out loud again, you hear me? Don’t.”

Lee nodded his throat constricting.

“How much are you missing?”  Liang asked as he checked the temperate of the boiled water before pouring it over the tea leaves.

“I remember about 3 days.” Lee said, “I sometimes know I’ve skipped time, other times I don’t.”

Liang’s face twisted into a deep scowl; he muttered a swear under his breath. All of this Lee noticed was very carefully hidden behind those giant sleeves of his.

Lee looked down at the slightly reflective surface of the tea. A thousand came to his mind but Lee found himself not asking any of them.

“Do you have a mirror?”

“Why?”

“Joo Dee doesn’t have any mirrors or anything reflective.” Lee said, “I don’t know why. I was hoping I could figure something out. The Dai Li get antsy when I touch my face, and Joo Dee has made me skip time before for it.”

“I don’t see anything usual. You’re a handsome young man… you have a large scar over your eye.”

Lee blinked, “It’s a scar?”

Liang jaw slacked and he shook himself a little, “It’s from fire, I think. Your hair covers most of it.”

Lee barely caught his hand before he could touch the scar. It’s a scar from fire.

“Do you… do you not remember how you go it?” Liang whispered.

“No.” His hand brushed the rough skin. It was rough bumpy then smoothed out into waxy lumps further out form the eye. Fire.

“Maybe that’s for the best.” Liang whispered very softly. His hand brushed Lee’s sleeve knocking the boy back out of his whirling thoughts. Liang’s eyes flickered to the door.

Abruptly a tray was shoved into Lee’s hands. “Get out their Lee! I don’t pay you to do nothing!”

Jumping Lee scrambled back and jumped to pass out the tea. His mind whirled. Liang didn’t meet his eyes again but Lee barely was paying attention to that.

How did I forget a scar like that?

Lee passed out tea with numb hands. Why do the Dai Li not want me to know about my scar?

Chapter Text

In his hand he tucked the little pocket mirror Liang has smuggled him back under the sheets.  Lee curled up pulling the blankets to his face and brushing the eye. It felt familiar and the flashes of red, and endless blue fluttered around his brain.

It must have hurt. He blinked back a flash of scarlet that lingered behind his eyes. His temples throbbed a sharp pain driving the thought away.

Lee rolled over pulling his hand away. He stared up at the dark ceiling. Exhaustion pressed against his head. He felt like there where two boulders squeezing his brain. But his heart was racing and he couldn’t relax. Every noise had his mind lurching awake.

I won’t be able to escape if I’m too tired.

It was a bad excuse. He would try anyways. His head pounded. His hand clasped the lotus tile hidden in his slippers.

I just need to get out of here. How hard can it be to hide in a fucking city?

His eyes snapped open and Lee rolled to his side and stayed still letting his mind race. If he had enough money he might be able to find someone to smuggle him out of the Upper Ring.  He could probably hide in the Lower Ring. It was supposed to be crowded down there. He could hide at least well enough until he figured out how to get out of Ba Sing Se.

There were the trams that ran from wall to wall. But there was no direct tram from the Lower Wall to the Upper wall. If he got to the Middle ring he might be able to sneak across the agriculture wall until he figured out how to get to the Lower wall.

It’s the best he had.

Lee sat up slipping on his slippers the lotus tile clutched in his hand. He heard Joo Dee’s rhythmic shallow breaths as he stood up. The floor didn’t even creek as he moved. His muscles taking over in a familiar rhythm as he crept around the apartment. He found a cloak that he tugged on. He shoved a few coins Joo Dee had left out into his pockets. Slipping through the windows he crawled up onto the roof and then he was off.

The Dai Li had been watching. He heard the first one following after him. Slipping down a chimney stack he ducked into a shadow. The Dai Li landed loudly onto the cement. Lunging Lee dragged the man back into the shadows pinching his neck until he passed out.

Lee stole the hat draping the tunic over his own cloths. Climbing back onto the walls he took off. A few agents looked at him as he worked his way towards the trams, but they didn’t approach.

It was nearly dawn when he was close to the trams. Tugging off the tunic and the hat he shoved both of them into a rose bush and ran to the station. He got the ticket easily enough. Tucked into a corner of the train away from any of the windows and watching all the entrances and exits Lee slumped into his seat as the train started.

That’s when the ticket collector came by. The man seemed to take one look at Lee and focus in on a young man alone. He loomed over Lee scowling down at him as Lee produced his ticket. The conductor didn’t punch the ticket. He scowled down at Lee sizing him up.

“A little young to be traveling alone.” The conductor looked at him scowling at the tea shop apron, “What are you doing?”

“Uh, going for supplies?”

The man grumbled and punched the ticket moving onto his next victim.

Lee slumped in his seat as the conductor moved on to the next passenger. Around him he watched the rows of houses roll by then they were past the wall and the Middle Wall opened up with splotched of gardens. He could make out a bit building connected to several high roofed buildings. That had to be the famous university. It was encircled by a giant garden with it’s tall branches.

The cart shifted left and the university slipped out of view. Lee leaned back into the seat. He felt the cart coming to a stop. As soon as the doors opened lee pushed foreward into the thick of the crowd. His heart leapt into his throat. Dai Li stood on either side of the door scowling down at the passangers. Lee felt the rush fear crash through the crowds.  Conversation died in people’s throats and helds almost in unision jerked down. Lee slipped in behind a large man who stood a good head and a half taller than himself. Keepign to the shadows he kept his eyes down.

There was a ripple of fear as the Dai Li moved, and the crowd shuffled faster as a unit. Knees knocked into his legs and Lee gripped the big man’s tunic as he stumbled. Honey brown eyes glanced back at him. The man galcned at a Dai Li out of the croner of his eye and tucked Lee into the crook of his arm. Hands clawed at his tunic but they slipped off as the Big man pushed him forward. The crowd spread and Lee glanced back. The big man caught Lee’s nod with a grimace.

Lee took off down the street.

He heard the pounding feet of the Dai Li behind him. Slipping around a corner Lee dived head first into a trash bin and tugged the lid over himself. He heard the footsteps pass by.

After a time, he crawled out form his hiding spot. A waft of rotten vegetables filled his nose.

“How demeaning.” Lee muttered. The alley was quiet around him. Over head there were garments hanging out to dry swinging lightly in the breeze.

Lee grabbed whatever looked like it might fit. He changed quickly, shoved the clothes into the bin, and started down the street. There where plenty of people to cover him as he wandered the city. Lee ignored his growling stomach as he searched.  He followed the sight of older buildings down into a street. It wasn’t a bad street, Lee was certain he had been around worse even if he didn’t remember, but it was enough to find what he needed.

Eyes followed him but it wasn’t the Dai Li this time.

Lee was close to the wall now, it towered high up into the heaven hiding the sun from view. As Lee approached he spotted the hole in the wall were the river flowed down into the Lower Ring. Around the hole, earth kingdom guards sat mostly lounging laughing with the citizens. They didn’t wear the dark green of the Dai Li, but the bright green of an earth kingdom soldier’s uniform.

Lee slipped into the shadows and watched. Overhead the night settled and the corner grew completely dark.

Lee. Snuck out keeping low. Rolling close to the bank a half a mile up stream. He took a breath then dived into the river. The current caught him quickly and his palms scrapped against rocks on the bottom of the river. Adrenaline filled him as he slipped on by the guards.

They didn’t even notice.

Deep into the middle of the Lower Ring Lee crawled out of the river walking away. He let the water drip and his feet sink into the bank of the river. Each step into the wet mud felt like a taunt. A giddy pride washed over him curling his lips into a mocking sneer. Overhead the young moon glimmered and with the dim light of that moon Lee slipped deeper into the Lower Ring.

He’d sleep on the ground, he’d sleep in wet clothes, none of that mattered he was free.

Chapter Text

“Hey kid!” a hand shook him. Lee jumped lashing out at the person. An older man plopped onto the dirt beside him. He looked rough, his clothes had a bunch of patches in them and his hair was oil but well kept.

“You ok kid?”

“I’m not a kid.” Lee snapped out looking around at the street. He had fallen asleep in a little corner beside an entrance to a shop. The sun was just up and people where just starting to come out of their homes.

The man’s eyes narrowed, “Hey you wouldn’t happen to be Lee would you?”

“There’s a lot of Lees.”

He let out a startled laugh, “I’m Huan. Your uncle Mushi is really worried about you. He said his nephew was a young man, scar over his left face, and grouchy; you him? We’re pretty close to the tea shop.”

“I don’t know a Mushi.”

Huan frowned folding his legs for a long talk even in the middle of the road, “Is he treating you ok?”

“I…” and the words died on his lips. Would he even remember if he did have an uncle? If this Mushi was anything like the old guy in front of him Lee would be able to escape if things went bad. “Right Mushi. I… uh hit my head?”

Huan raised a skeptical eyebrow. “If you say so.”

“Yeah.” Lee nodded, “Take me to Mushi…. Please.”

Huan lead Lee to a little tea shop tucked neatly along a busy street in the middle of the Lower Ring. Nothing looked familiar but Lee walked in to a wall of familiar smelling tea. Something itched at the back of his mind at the smell of the mellow tones hanging in the air.

That… that was familiar.

“Just a moment!” an older man came out form the back. He was shorter than Lee, round with a smile lines lining his face.

Lee felt the ground swoop from under him. He knew this man; the name slipped his mind but the familiarity had Lee jogging up to him.

The tea pot nearly split all over the table but Mushi caught himself in time. And then there were two arms wrapping him up in a tight hug as a face pressed into his neck, “Oh nephew! Where have you been?”

A line of tension his Lee’s shoulders unknotted itself and Lee turned a hesitant smile at the familiar stranger.

“Hello.”

Mushi stared and his smile began to drop, “nephew? Is everything alright?”

“I’ll tell you later.”

Mushi took his easily enough stepping back. He offered Lee a seat until Mushi’s shift was over. Lee ended up working after getting bored a couple of minutes.

They where silent as they walked back to the apartment. Once inside Mushi waved his hand and a candle sprouted in flame. Shock coursed through Lee and he paused long enough that Mushi send a worried look at Lee.

“Zuko, why don’t you go get changed?”

Lee looked around. When Mushi didn’t say anything, he realized with a growing numbness he was Zuko.

Was he Lee or was he Zuko?

Mechanically he dressed coming back out it a little dinner with steaming rice, vegetables, and a pot of fresh tea. Mushi was waiting for him after Lee had finished his inspection of this ‘Zuko’ person.

Mushi was sitting straighter and the smile on his face was sharper when Lee came out. Still, he didn’t try and tell Lee, or Zuko, what was going on right away. Lee hope that was a good sign.

“I have been very worried about you nephew.”

A prickle of unease crawled up lee’s spine.

“After your fight the Dai Li arrested you and I have not heard anything since. The refugees here said I wouldn’t. I was hoping you would be the exception.” Mushi finished. Golden eyes stared at Lee the hairs on the back of his neck raised. But the old man smiled and poured some more tea. “I have been rude. Tell me Lee, what has happened to you?”

Lee narrowed his eyes. He knew this trap. Couldn’t say how, but the shiver crawling up his spine answered that question.

“What’s the right answer?

Mushi paused his smile falling off his face, “Well I guess that depends on you. Do you know who I am.”

“Mushi, my uncle.”

Mushi nodded stroking his beard, “And you are Lee.”

“You don’t think so.”

There was hint of a smile of Mushi’s face, “It seems nephew that I should have heeded your warning. For that I’m sorry.”

Lee didn’t understand he pushed it away and considered the man. He was familiar in a way Joo Dee wasn’t quite familiar but Lee also knew better than to trust that. He took a sip of the tea. The smell curled in his belly he could feel it like a word on the tip of his tongue.

“I know you.” Lee decided.

The man nodded, “I know you very well. To me you are my nephew Zuko.”

He was being consistent at least. Though a good lie would be consistent.

“And I disappeared.”

“You were arrested after a fight. It’s been some weeks since then.”

“By the Dai Li.”

“Yes.” The man placed his tea cup down. A sigh shuttered through him but he came up with a sad smile on his face, “My name is Iroh. I am your father’s older brother. We came to Ba Sing Se as refugees, we changed our names to avoid attention. Not that it worked.”

Lee looked at him eyes narrowed, “What do the Dai Li want?”

“That I am not sure. I was hoping you might know.”

“I don’t know. I… I’ve been losing time. I think I’m missing days.” Lee said, “Every time it the same thing though, I’m a tea server in the upper ring of Ba Sing Se. I live with my aunt Joo Dee who helps me with memory problems. I think my parents passed?”

Iroh face furrowed into a scowl his hand slowly stroking his chin. “Like an echo in the cave, the message distorted but the sound still there.”

Lee blinked, “What?”

Iroh chuckled he didn’t answer the question instead keeping to the conversation, “There is one very important part of your story that you didn’t answer. What do the Dai Li want?”

“I don’t know.”

“They wouldn’t take your memory if they wanted to use you for political means.” Iroh said, “And frankly nephew you don’t have the disposition to be one of the Joo Dee’s I’ve heard about.”

“What do you mean?”

“You scowl too much.” Iroh chuckled, “Something I’ve never been more grateful for.”

“Oh.” Lee flushed, “Right.”

“Either way Nephew, this place is no longer safe for you. We should move on.”

Lee felt like the floor crumpled under his feet and his breath gusted out at once, “Leave?”

“There are still places we can go.” Iroh was saying even when blood roared past his ears, “It might be tricky to leave without attracting attention but I can get it done.”

“And you would come with me?”

The smile Iroh gave him was almost nervous, “I would be honoured if you allowed me to stay with you. Family sticks together.”

Lee felt the words stick in his throat pressing down on his tongue. He couldn’t quiet name the wiggling in his stomach. It crept up and came out in a tentative smile.

“I’ll get your bed ready.” Iroh placed a warm palm on Lee’s shoulder. His eyes glistened slightly in the light, “I’m happy you’re alright.”

Lee looked up. Fear clenched through his stomach but then Iroh squeezed his shoulder gently and stepped back. Lee looked down at his tea his face heating with the happiness bubbling up from his belly.

Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to be Zuko

Chapter Text

The ceiling was green; the comforter was boiling hot. Sweat prickled his skin as Lee rolled over. Kicking off the comfort he looked around. Th early dawn casted blue tints against the green walls casting everything in cool tones.

A snore interrupted Lee’s thought. Jumping he looked over at the old man sleeping next to him. The ruckus gulp soothed out into a high whistle. Annoyance sent Lee stomping out of the small room. Throwing open the door Lee stumbled to a stop.

The floor boards where icy cold under his feet, but it was the stupid cups on the table that sucked the breath out of his lungs. Creeping foreword Lee looked down at his three quarters empty tea cup and Iroh’s empty cup. The stove had a pot on it. Lifting the lid Lee looked down at last night’s dinner.

A gush of air escaped his lips and Lee looked around. Slippers were still were he last left them; the left slipper turned slightly inward. Nothing touched, nothing changed.

Lee hasn’t missed anything waking this time.

The relief that flooded him was palatable. There was a warm burning igniting in his stomach as his eyes roved over the apartment that didn’t change.

A groan startled him. Opening the bedroom door Lee watched as Iroh stretched, he folded his blanket and rolled up his futon.  

“Good morning Lee!” Iroh greeted once he did both of there futon’s, “Would you like to welcome the sun with me this morning?”

Iroh didn’t seem offended when Lee didn’t say anything. He paused turning to the direction of the sun and bowing. He then started to move slowing through a series of stretches. Something itched at the back of Lee’s mind. Lee stepped onto the mat beside Iroh following the stretches.

But he wasn’t following, not really. Lee closed his eyes and felt his body move through the motions still in time with Iroh. He knew this.  

“What is this?” Lee asked.

“It is the sun’s greeting. I have always found it woke my old body nicely.”

They spun, and Lee knew they were facing west. The sun behind them, he could almost feel it through the layers of stone, rooms, and people.

“It’s a firebending thing. You’re a firebender.”

“I am.” Iroh eventually replied.

Lee swallowed and didn’t speak. They finished up soon enough, and Iroh was shuffling over to the kettle. “These old bones are no good before my morning cup.”

There was a flash of fire and the stove was alight warming up the left over water. Lee leaned on the counter watching as Iroh unfolded a packet of loose leaves.

“I’m a fire bender.”

“You are.” Iroh said, “Though if you’ve forgotten that then I don’t recommend you try bending unless I’m around for the first while. I want to make sure you haven’t forgotten how to control your flame.”

“If we’re fire benders then why are we here?”

“That has a long answer and a shorter answer.” Iroh said, “The short one is that we’re refugees of the fire nation.”

Iroh stroked his bread with a grin, "And soon to be refugees of Ba Sing Se. Perhaps we should by a lottery ticket nephew!"

Lee groaned rolling his eyes. He jerked a finger to his scar, “What about this? Is the scar related to being refugees?” 

Iroh poured their tea, spooning rice, and thin broth for breakfast; his face ashen. “In a manner.”

“How did I get it.”

There was something odd in Iroh’s face. Lee couldn’t quiet place the expression. But his manner remained gentle almost obsessively so. The rice and soup where placed next to him with hardly a sound.

“It’s not a nice story.”

“I didn’t think it was going to be.” Lee snapped. “Tell me.”

“What happens when you try to remember?” Iroh asked instead.

“Stop stalling!”

“Humour me.” Iroh requested.

“It hurts.” Lee said. “Headaches, migraines.”

Iroh looked at him for a long moment. Reluctantly he finally admitted, “Your father did that.”

Lee felt like he had been punched in the gut. The air drove out of him a horse rush “What?”

Iroh’s face twisted barely holding in his anger. “It wasn’t your fault. Your father was wrong. He should never have treated you like that.”

Lee’s mind whirled. Red flickered behind his eyes, a wall of fire. Pain lashed through his mind. Lee gasped curling as his head ached like a needled stabbed through it.

“Zuko!” Iroh called behind a muffled wall.

There was talking, Lee couldn’t make out the words. He focused and the edges of his vision blurred more. The ache faded as the whisper grew echoing in his brain.

A palm wrapped around his wrist. Lee flinched but the hand didn’t let go.

“Zuko?” a voice pleaded, “Zuko? Lee?”

“I… I’m going for a walk.”

“Lee, please wait!” Iroh was still holding onto his shoulders as Lee tried to stand. He stumbled into Iroh, “Lee are you alright? Stay a moment, rest. A man needs his rest. We can talk, have tea. I don’t think you should leave right now.”

Lee shrugged off Iroh’s hands. He barely had time to kick on shoes beside the door his feet not wanting to stop for a second. The shoes fit like where his shoes and not Iroh’s with his smaller feet.  and Lee tried to swallow around the panic gurgling up his throat.

He stumbled outside into a golden ray of sunlight. The sun fanned the burning warmth inside of him. He felt like a flame, like a candle was tucked away in his heart. Under the sunlight the flicker became a flame.

He was a fire bender. Iroh hadn’t be lying.

Lee sucked in a gulp of air his hand palming the pai sho tile still tucked safely away.

The whispers faded away as Lee breathed deeply feeling the flame burning under his skin. It felt like life, like the burn of passion wrapped under his skin.

He closed his eyes reaching lower and it flowed from his belly into his limbs, warming up into his tongue until he was cradled in flame. It didn’t burn, it didn’t hurt. Like a wrap of blanket, it curled inside of him ready to defend.

He blinked open his eyes looking back at the blue sky. Carts started to bustle around him. Lee followed the sun down the street nearly hypnotized by the light of Agni.

The bustle of the streets around him felt like a cover, and Lee followed the tide trying to keep in the sunlight as best he could. He breathed the cold morning air pushed out the staleness from his lungs.

A flicker of orange caught his eye and Lee turned and looked at a small boy. He was wearing bright orange and yellow robes. His head completely shaved displaying a blue tattoo down the back of his neck.

His breath left as the boy glued a poster to a stone wall. He flicked out his arm, his staff snapping open with orange wings.

Lee felt rooted into place. The fire inside of him turned cold. His breath caught. Stumbling forward Lee watched the boy leap into the air spinning off, gone like a leaf in the wind.

“The Avatar!” a woman whispered

Lee felt the burn of pain in his head. Stumbling forward he shoved through the crowd up to the stone wall. It was a picture of a great horned beast.

Flying bison

His head ached; Lee forced through it. He could taste the anger driving up in his bones. It felt like desperation. There was a burn through his mind but the burn chilled as a memory hissed back. The skin on his eye tingled.

“And suffering will be your teacher.”

Lee, no Zuko, he was Zuko, Zuko the Burnt and Banished. His mind locked onto the Avatar and he felt his heart pound wildly under his skin. The fire so warm before itched as it burnt up his throat. His eyes stung. He knew this beast for what it was, it was a desperate grief.

He shoved his way up to the poster. He ignored the shouts around him. Gritting his teeth, he felt the fire licking against his tongue. His nail scrapped against the poster and it ripped free.

Fire leapt that the edges of his teeth. He spun around looking up.

The Avatar! He couldn’t have gone far. Zuko shoved the people away bolting after the Avatar.

His eyes burned and blurred, the memories kept coming flashes, sweet, then sour, a man silhouetted in wreaths of flame, a figure emerging into the light of the stadium. Vomit burned the back of his throat.

Zuko slammed into someone. Stumbling back, he snarled. The shadows rattled. His hands slammed together with a clap of rock, and the tears slipped free.

The Dai Li had caught up with him.

Zuko lunged but the shadows rattled. Fire roared under his feet as he kicked. A burst of pain against his temple flashed, he stumbled. Zuko felt his legs buckle and the dark green robes surrounded him. His vision speckled blackish green.

The air around him tasted like wet rust on the back of his tongue. Blinking he looked up at the dark room his body sagged in a chair. One lantern glowed like an oil smudge in the murky blacks and greens. The light illuminating the nitre on the walls.  

His body ached. Damp wool scratched his skin. His neck popped as he leaned back looking around his breath echoing against the stone walls.

He… he didn’t know who he was. Acid crawled up the back of his throat. He wasn’t supposed to be here. There was a haunting blankness covering his memories. It sweltered in his head like a heavy velvet blanket in the boiling summer. Swallowing he strained raw wrists against the ropes.

“You’ll have to come up with some excuse.” There was a man’s voice.

His head jerked around with a sharp pain; his eyes caught on the flicker of white pants in what must have been a doorway. Dread crawled up his throat. He wasn’t alone, if he made any sound these strangers would know.

“The Avatar…” a woman’s voice came through the same doorway just out of sight.

“The Avatar is only a child.” The man chastised, “children are easily manipulated. Make up some excuse Joo Dee, I am running out of patience with you.”

“He doesn’t listen to me!”

“Joo Dee, the Earth King welcomes you to Lake Laogai.”

A breath rattled through his ribcage. The smudge of light darkened into nothing. He blinked

Chapter Text

There was a light, the light wasn’t moving but it stood out like an awful smudge on a black canvas. In the room a man stood with two Dai Li. Lee’s eyes darted low. His muscles froze. The low murmur of the Dai Li didn’t stop.  They hadn’t caught on yet.

“The training is not sticking.” The man said. “The tests have all failed. The brainwashing has failed even faster than with the Joo Dee.”

“If we are going to use him, we have to do so quickly. The Avatar may have stopped the drill but the Fire nation army has not retreated.” The Dai Li was right in front of the door. Lee eyed his boots; the yellow hemline of his long tunic brushed the top of black leather shoes.  “We have to take the chance and plant him into the army while we still have the chance to react to the fire nation’s plans. Any later and we will lose the advantage.”

“If the brainwashing does not hold then he’s useless as either a spy or an earth kingdom soldier.” The second Dai Li said, “Useless but too dangerous to keep around. The General’s been poking around. He’s starting to lose his patience Sir.”

Lee didn’t dare to breath. His heart pounded wildly in his chest.

“Sir this is a failed experiment. He is useless to us. We should focus our efforts on maintaining control over the city. The Avatar will stop any attempts on Ba Sing Se.” The Second Soldier finished.

“Would the Avatar care?” The Fire Dai Li asked. The boots shifted and Lee’s hair prickled under the gaze. The man shifted and the eyes where gone off his back.

“It’s not worth the risk.” The man interrupted, “The Avatar is proving frustratingly difficult to control.”

Lee felt a rush of empathy. Yeah, the Avatar is really hard to capture.

“If we use the Avatar’s bison.” The First Dai Li said, “We could offer the beast as a sign of friendship. It could get the Avatar to trust you Sir long enough we can deposit the Earth King.”

“That is enough.” The leader interrupted the two Dai Li. He breathed stopping suddenly as footsteps came dashing from somewhere in the hallway.

The door opened and a new pair of boots came into the room. It was another long dark green tunic of the Dai Li. The hem was dusty and spattered with mud.  “Sir! The Avatar and his crew! They have discovered the underground tunnels!”

“What?” the leader hissed storming out of the room, “Gather all available forces!”

Boots ran out of the room. The door started to slide shut. The momentum sent the door bouncing back open as the lock didn’t catch.

Lee lifted his head and started at the murky green lit hallway. The silence descended and seemed to echo against the clammy stones. His heart pounded wildly in his chest. He had to escape. He… he….

His head ached but Lee had no time for that. He needed to know; he needed a plan.

Closing his eyes Lee leaned his head back and tried to think. There had to be something he could do. The rope chaffed his wrists, too tight to wriggle out, the knots too far for his fingers to pick at.

His head pounded. Gritting his teeth, Lee forced his thoughts forward. What had he been doing before? There was a feeling of sunshine in his thoughts, the ghosting scent of jasmine. Lee closed his eyes and he could almost feel the prickling warmth of the sun even thought the miles of stone. Like the rays were trying to seep farther and deeper, like they were searching.

Lee clung to that searching warmth. He felt something in his belly fill gushing with warmth that spread through his stiff joints and cold skin. Lee stoked the fire. He smelt the burning ropes before he realized what he was doing.

Fire bender. He was a fire bender.

Pushing against the agony pounding in his head Lee felt something click and snap back into place. A flash of fire sparked against the stones casting bright shadows against the stone. Lee’s arms sagged foreword. He stumbled to his feet. His shoulders ached. Crashing into the wall Lee pressed his sweat forehead against the stone breathing his nausea away.

He had to escape.

He had a mission.

Avatar. The Avatar was his mission. He had to find the Avatar. He remembered that…. The rest was pretty vague. Lee had done more with less. The Avatar it was.

That Dai Li was right, the Avatar wouldn’t be fair from his bison.

Shoving his exhaustion aside Lee took his first wobbling step, then another, and soon he was stumbling out of the door determination keeping him on his feet.

The halls were empty. Half way down the empty hall Lee heard the thunderous crashing of earth bending. A whuffing noise caught his ear. Turning Lee shoved open a heavy metal door nearly falling over.

On the other side a huge beast with gritty matted fur growled at him. Lee stumbled in looking at the arrow forehead, the big black eyes.

“You’re the bison.” Lee whispered awed. He nearly tripped closing the door behind himself. The Bison’s legs shuffled around. Lee counted six with an odd sort of glee. It… it looked so fluffy.

He came foreword hand outstretched. The bison growled and Lee jerked to a stop. The bison huffed shaking his head in a threatening manner.

Lee backed up. So, no petting the giant fluffy bison, got it. Chains rattled and Lee decided that maybe that should have been his focus from the get go.

Right chains.

How to break.

Lee looked around. Lifting a hand, he lit the room. The bison yelped at the flash of flame. Jumping back the fire snuffed and the room descended back into darkness. The bison shook his head horns lowers and jutting fiercely out at Lee. The chains rattled.  

“I’m sorry.” Lee whispered. The bison growled.

Lee inched closer squinting in the dark at the thick chains.  The manacles were tight against the white fur. They attached with an extra loop to heavy chains that were bolted to the floor. Lee ran a hand around the bolts on the floor. Running his hand up the chain he felt the little nicks in the metal.

The bison huffed again. Hot breath ruffled Lee’s hair. The bison was suddenly towering over him. His breath caught in his throat.

“Don’t freak out.”

He wrapped his hands around the chains and pressed the fire into the metal. His palms heated up and the metal did. Vomit pressed against the back of his throat. Lee grit his teeth and forced the fire deeper into the metal. The smell made his nose itch.

Gagging he stumbled back. He felt a flash of memory, his face itched. Sucking in a breath Lee lifted his leg and slammed his foot through the chain.

The chain snapped. He threw up.

His body shook, his face throbbed in sympathy pain with his hands.

So fire benders are immune to their own fire and heat to a certain point, but not other’s fires or things superheated. That sucks.

Something lowed softly. Lee stumbled back to his feet. The bison was watching him carefully now. It sniffed him. A wet tongue scrapped against his cheek. It was startling cold against his flushed skin. Lee flinched and the bison wuffed and a cool breeze wrapped around him. The bison shuffled away.

“My mission is the Avatar.” Zuko looked the bison in the eye, “My mission is the Avatar.”

His chanting filled the air, filled his mind, and he seized up the next chain. Blisters popped with bursts of pain like popcorn. He dropped the chain. His foot slammed through the weak metal.

He tucked his hands against his torso. Blinking out the tears and gagging at the smell.

“My mission.” Zuko panted, “My mission….”

His throat burned. He swallowed and grabbed the next chain. Then the next, and the next.

Green bile spattered against the black stone. The sour smell made Zuko cough harder. Something pressed sticky hot fur against his back. A whine slipped from his throat. The bison crooned. A bushy face rubbed against the back of Zuko’s head.  Teeth grabbed the back of his tunic. Zuko wriggled as he was picked up by the bison.

There was a tremendous rumbling deep in the cave. The bison didn’t go anywhere near the rumbling. It walked down the halls Zuko firmly held in its jaws. The bison clam walking slapped Zuko’s mind back to reality.

Zuko started to wriggle. “Let me go!”

The Bison ignored him. The bison turned a corner they ran into a dead end. Zuko wriggled again. The Bison ignored him again and turned around. The Bison let Zuko go. Scrambling up a paw wrapped around him before he could get his feet under him. His palms scraped on the stone and he winced. A second paw wrapped around him and Zuko was smooshed up against the bison’s belly.  Made the world

A tremendous slap made the world around him rattle. A gush of water tugged on his cloths nearly tearing him from his spot under the bison’s belly. Paws tightened around him as the current yanked on his clothes. Zuko’s hands clamped on the belly fur. Icy water slapped against his face. The darkness set his mind whirling he fought harder. The paws didn’t let go.

The Bison broke from the lake. Sparkling water rained underneath him as the bison lifted them into the air.

Chapter Text

Feeling a bit like a possum-hare, Zuko clung tighter to the bison belly trying not to sneeze into the fur. The pain from his hands sent lighting bolts up his hands as Zuko’s arms began to shake.  He pushed weakly on the beast’s belly but the bison held him fast. Tucked under the belly Zuko mostly just heard the remnants of a battle. His head ached and he blinked black spots out of his eyes.

Zuko tumbled to the ground as the bison let him go.

“Appa!”

“Wait there’s someone under him!” a little girl shouted.

Zuko’s head swam the sun blinded him fanning the fire in his belly. Oh wait, that’s really nice. Zuko added that to a list of things he definitively knew.

1. He was a fire bender
2. The bison was important to the Avatar
3. Also very fluffy.
4. The sun was great
5. His mission was the Avatar. What he was supposed to do with said Avatar still was uncertain.

In all, he was up to five things! Which was an improvement over the pervious hour’s two things.

The bison, Appa, stepped back revealing Zuko.

“Zuko?!” Feet skirted to a stop spraying dirt everywhere. Zuko tried to blink the sunlight out of his eyes

Zuko tried to push himself up wincing at the burns on his hands. He squinted up at the stupid Avatar group complete with a flying menace.

“Are you for Aang?” the not-avatar boy shouted shoving his boomerang under Zuko’s nose. “Cause you’re not getting him!”

Was he? Zuko wasn’t sure. He wasn’t really sure where he was, only that he was out, and he was finally himself again. There was a half-remembered mission and that was the only thing Zuko could firmly grasp.

Zuko turned and squinted up at the Avatar. “Are you Avatar?”

“Um.” The boy nodded, “Yes?”

Zuko leaned over, wincing he patted Aang’s foot, “Found you.”

There mission accomplished.

Zuko yawned cradling his throbbing hands against his chest and flopped onto his back. The sun was really nice, the ray soaked into his skin as it dissipated through his body.

“That’s it?” The blue boy shrieked.

The Avatar crouched down beside Zuko. Appa’s big wet nose pressed against Aang’s back. “Hey Zuko, are you alright?”

Zuko blinked up at the beautiful blue sky, and wondered how people were supposed to respond to dumb questions.

“Hey you wanna come ride the giant fluff ball with us and storm a palace?” the short young girl asked instead.

That was a much better question. Zuko looked up at her. She was grinning like she already knew the answer.

“How many Dai-Li can I punch?”

“All the ones I’m done with.”

“Sure,” Zuko rolled onto his wobbly feet. His hands throbbed smearing blood over the ground.

The blue girl swooped in helping him up. She grimaced at the state of his hands. Before she could do anything, the Avatar’s wrapped his arm around Zuko’s waist hosting both of them up onto Appa’s back. The blue girl clambered up tucking herself right beside Zuko.

Popping open a waterskin she pointed at his hands, “Can I heal those?”

“Oh um, thanks?”

Her smile was weird. Even Zuko could tell, so it probably was really off. But no one was explaining and everyone else was getting onto Appa’s back, so Zuko figured it was going to be ok.

“Yip-yip Appa!”

Air gust around him with the weightless sensation. He felt himself float like a feather on the breeze. Settled between Appa’s shoulder blades Zuko rocked softly with the rhythm of Appa’s flying. 

Amazing.  Zuko looked at the sky wondering how far up that endless blue went. A flash of envy filled his belly. It must be amazing to be an air bender.

“What are you doing in Ba Sing Se?” the Avatar shouted back his voice carrying on the wind strangely, “How did you get down in Lake Lao Gai? Are the Dai Li after you? We can protect you.”

Zuko shrugged. He didn’t remember.

The water soaked into the burning hot flesh pulling the heat away in soothing washes. It felt almost like a burn cream. But the coolness lingered longer.

Zuko shrugged. “My mission is the Avatar… and I found you. So I’m done? I think.”

Aang chewed his lip meeting eyes with Katara, he gripped his staff tighter, “What are you going to do now?”

“Huh.” Zuko blinked tearing his eyes away from the clouds around them, “I don’t know.”

“You wanna come with us?”

“Toph!” the water boy hissed, “Look I don’t know what your deal is but if you’re here to capture—”

The little girl hit him hard in the side, the water boy wheezed out the rest of his sentence in a unintelligible gush.

Beside him the water girl smiled brightly, “Your hands are almost better!”

They were. Zuko flexed them in the water the skin twinged slightly but it didn’t hurt anymore.

“Be gentle to them.” The water girl said, her smile took on a more genuine note, “Thank you for rescuing Appa. What do you want to do now? Can we drop you off?”

What was he going to do? He had been taken prisoner then escaped. He had to leave the city but there was no where else to go. He didn’t have anyone anymore.

He didn’t have anyone, but maybe that wasn’t true. Zuko looked up back at Aang, back at the Avatar and wondered about his mission.

What he supposed to capture Aang? What for? Aang looked really nice, and he moved and behaved like he was really nice. (Maybe a little scared of Zuko, Zuko wasn’t sure what to make about that) His eyes sparkled with a hopeful sort of smile. Like things could just be made all better with a good hug and warm food.

The water girl immediately offered to heal him, and the other one just kinda invited him along. Sure the water boy kept darting suspicious looked but he was also trying to shoulder his way in front of Aang and the little girl. It was …sweet. It almost felt familiar.  Zuko tried to remember why, but the image wouldn’t form like the shade was all wrong.

The water pulled away and Zuko flushed under the attention. They were waiting for his answer.

His memories were still so murky. Zuko didn’t know what his mission was only that the Avatar was the goal. Aang was right in front of him, so he completed it (probably).

Zuko frowned trying to remember what the mission was A flash of white-hot pain with hissed words came down on his mind like the thin blade of a guillotine. The punishment given before he could remember the crime.

He wasn’t sure he wanted to remember.

“I don’t know.” Zuko whispered, “I don’t remember.”

The water bender’s hands stilled and she looked with wide eyes, “Where you taken by the Dai Li?”

“I don’t know how long it’s been.” Zuko said, “I just woke up.”

“We could give his memories back like with that Jet guy?” the earth bender girl said.

Zuko watched both Katara and Aang winced; their eyes worried and communicating a whole conversation between them.

“I don’t know if I want to remember.” Zuko admitted. He tucked his hands in his sleeves, and it felt safer even as his mind told him he shouldn’t be showing his nerves so clearly. “I just remember enough to know it’s bad.”

Zuko’s hand fluttered up to the wrinkled, hard skin of his scar.

Aang paled sitting up straighter, “That last person we helped started to remember by thinking about his worse memory.”

Zuko’s fingers brushed over the withered casing of his ear, “I see.”

“What happened with the scar?” Katara winced, “Thinking it through could help bring all your memories. I can ease any head aches….”

The fragment he had was awful. He didn’t want it to sharpen any more. A hand holding his shoulder in a mock resemblance of comfort. Then the flames pressed down on his face, the sensation tickling until the hooks of flame grabbed hold and buried themselves under his skin.  Bile rose to the back of his throat.

It was punishment. Zuko knew that. He was meant to learn from the experience and to shy away from it would be cowardly.

But still.

“I don’t want to remember and for things to get worse.” Zuko admitted.

“That’s your worse memory though, right?” Aang asked, “So by definition it won’t be as bad as that memory.”

That… was true.

Zuko’s hand dropped he looked out at the wide-open sky, the sun illuminating the world in warm soothing rays.

“It’s your choice, and if you don’t want to remember then we’ll stop pressuring you. If… if you stay you have lots of time to think it through!” Aang beamed despite the worried looks his friend sent back to him.

“I can finish healing your hands.” Katara said, “You can decide then. It’s your choice and your memories. No one will force you.”

She gave the Avatar a sharp scowl. He flushed and looked down at his feet nodding.

“Besides we have a palace to storm.” The younger girl said picking her nose, “You can’t miss that.”

“Yeah it’ll be a riot to see Long Feng’s face.” The water boy grinned he elbowed the girl and Aang, “Get it? A riot.”

Wordlessly Zuko held out his hands. He stared at the wispy clouds in the sky and wished that the bison ride out never end.

The Earth King was a strange man. Zuko thought he was more than a bit of fool. He paraded his weaknesses like a crown for all to see. The thoughtlessness, softness, and overly trusting nature left only a fool. Something in Zuko told him that was a very very dangerous position to be in.

“With the earth king now back in charge I think it’s time we go and do some other…” Sokka glanced at Zuko, “Avatar stuff.”

Aang whirled around with a dramatic whoof of wind from where he was talking to the Earth King. “Are you staying with us Zuko?! We’re really fun! We have campfires and sleepovers basically every night!”

Zuko looked around and wondered how any of them expected the Earth King to have a stable rule. “It’s probably not a, uh, good idea to leave Ba Sing Se with Earth King.”

“He’s the King.” Aang beamed, “Plus he seems like a nice enough guy! Maybe a little gullible. But like he’ll be a good ruler.”

“Um,” Zuko looked back at where the adult was standing smiling with the group of children. His head spun. “No?”

Is this what responsibility feels like?

“What?” the Earth King blinked wide eyed and hurt by Zuko’s words.

“He’ll be overthrown in a night or two?” Zuko tried.

The Earth King frowned. Actually the whole group got a suspicious, nervous glint to their eyes.

“And why is that Zuko?” Sokka leaned forward crossing his arms. Zuko leaned back out of his way blinking at the boy.

“Because a fool is court is a dead one?” Zuko said, “You can’t be gullible in court… it’s um. They’ll… You can’t.”

Zuko frowned trying to think. His memories came up blank with only a very strong sense of foreboding. Part of him wanted to glance over his shoulder to see who was hovering making his spine tingle. The other half knew that sort of weakness never ended well. It was better to just not look.

“Well, Sparks ’s not wrong about the court thing.”

“Sparks?”

“That’s you.”

“Oh. Ok.” Zuko paused, “Is my name actually Sparks? I thought it was Zuko… or maybe Lee?”

“No your Zuko.” Sokka correctly quickly, “Toph likes nicknames. It means she’s adopted you into the group. Which was not discussed by said group.”

Toph shrugged with a grin, “This isn’t a democracy, this is a dictatorship.”

“What Toph is trying to say,” Katara rolled her eyes but she was smiling and it ruined the whole put-out performance, “Is we’d love to have you stay with us and help us defeat the Fire Lord. Aang still needs to learn firebending, and you need somewhere safe to remember when your ready to. Maybe we can learn together?”

Sokka shrugged, “I mean it would be nice to not have to constantly worry about loosing the spark rocks.”

“Sokka.” Katara growled.

“Oh alright fine.” Sokka struck his hand out, “I know – well I guess you don’t, but we didn’t get off to a great start. But yeah, what’s the point of brainwashing if you can’t get a new start outta it? So yeah, you should come with us. We are significantly less evil than well a lot of other people in your life. Like I think all of them.”

“Nah the old tea dude is pretty great.”

“Oh true.” Sokka amended quickly, “Join us, we are significantly less evil than everyone in your life barring the cool Tea Dude.”

“I don’t think it works like that.” Zuko said.

“Shut up and take the bonding moment.” Sokka laughed. He clasped Zuko’s forearm, “Welcome to Team Avatar newbie.”

“Eh, the Gaang was better.”

“You said it sucked!”

Toph cackled. Beside her Aang bounced up nearly hovering off the floor on the balls of his feet, “So you’re really gonna stay?”

“Yeah.” Zuko nodded, “I’d like to.”

“And we’re friends now.” Aang came back down to earth. Something about the way he said that made Zuko wonder if he was missing something. Sokka had said they spoken before, so maybe Aang was remembering.

“Yeah, we’re friends.” Zuko nodded, and flushed at the giddy feeling bubbling up inside of him. He felt like little sparks, like a warm campfire popping happily away. “But before we leave, I remember I have to say goodbye to someone.”

“Who?”

“My Uncle.”

The group nodded, Toph crumpled the letter from her mom a little tighter, her other hand wrapped around Aang’s, “One last cup of tea before we all leave for our vacations?”

“That’s an amazing idea!” Aang beamed, “Zuko where’s your uncle?”

Zuko hurried after his new friends. As they chatted on their way over to Appa, he couldn’t help but feel he made the right decision after all, mission or not. Zuko knew who he was, and for the first time in however long he had been in the city for, Zuko wasn’t afraid of what was coming next.

He clambered up beside Sokka and Toph onto Appa’s new saddle. Exhaling in the golden sunlight, Zuko blinked.