Chapter Text
“The only person I could trust in this world…”
”Undesirable to all possible genders…”
”I don’t believe it…”
”Double your villains, double your fun…”
”And you did it in one afternoon…”
“That sounds like a challenge…”
”Unsubscribed, blocked, and reported…”
”All your life, you’ve been rejected by this world…”
”Oh Ivo, You’re no Maria…”
”For the one and only person who ever cared about me….”
”You were a syco-friend.”
”I love the way you make ‘em…”
“It’s been a real drag! Thanks for nothing!”
The deafening silence that followed the Eclipse cannon’s explosion left Ivo’s ears ringing. Although did he still have ears? Arms? Legs? A body for his head? He couldn’t be sure. A weightless feeling drifted over him. He felt like he was floating down…. down…. down…
He landed softly on ground that felt distantly familiar. His eyes peeked open blearily to a bright obnoxious sun. Rubbing his eyelids he expected to feel the texture of his expertly crafted control gloves. But there was no doubt about it that was skin.
His eyes shot open fully in alarm staring at two tiny hands. Free from wrinkles, cuts, or bruises. They were his, but from a time buried so deep in his memory it may as well be a far off dream.
Or nightmare.
He observed himself more extensively finding himself in his old boarding school uniform, a dreadfully dull navy blazer and tan dress pants. His little brown shoes were covered in mud. He slid his feet back and forth against the dew covered grass. It had rained the night before.
An egregious bellowing bell interrupted him knocking him backward in shock. He swallowed dryly and sat back up, he hoisted himself onto his knees and scooted over to peek over the bush he’d been hiding behind. Ugh I was so small at 7 years old.
There was nothing special about the school he grew up in. A privately owned, centuries old, heap of bricks towering over those deemed unworthy. The nuns with fake smiles hiding long wooden rulers hidden behind their back. He detested them ask much as his fellow classmates. Always so open to ridicule. Especially when Sister What’s her Face had to step out of the room.
He just wanted to read.
“Hey Cryvo how come you don’t have any parents,” Waste of breath #1 said.
”Maybe he’s an alien like Superman, Quick melt this book with your brain,” Future world leader exclaimed.
”I bet they took one look at him, and barfed all their guts out.“ Mouth breather #2 laughed.
”They probably realized they could do way better, so they dropped him at the door and never looked back.” Another kid cackled.
”Well which is it little orphan Annie,” the boy who sealed his fate asked.
He chucked his book at the first kid he could get a clean shot sending flying toward the wall. All the kids gasped as Sister Who Cares came back in the room.
”What is the meaning of this,” she yelled rushing to the boy with blood gushing out of his nostrils.
His small body’s acute stress response took action and he made a run for it a horrible cacophony of threats and insults echoed behind him.
He had waited behind that bush for hours at first he dreaded for someone to come looking for him but as the sun set he wanted, hoped someone was looking for him.
But no one did, he was alone. He fell asleep next to that bush and was found by a gardener the next day. He had been scolded and kept in his room for two weeks. Which jokes on them wasn’t a punishment to him.
He would always be alone it was better that way. It was quite no one to mock him, or ridicule him, or bring him lattes, or laugh at his jokes, or take care of his injuries, or sit and watch La Ultimá Passion with him, or just exist with him, or lo-
His cheeks are sweaty. There’s a rise in adrenocorticotropic hormones, prolactin, leucine-enkephalin, and oxytocin. This day had been the last time he had cried out of emotion in decades.
And once those metaphorical floodgates opened there was no shutting them. Ivo curled in on himself wailing harder than he ever had in his life. His body shook like a wilted leaf in the wind. There was a pounding in his head and a ringing in his ears. In all likelihood he expected to convulse here until him inevitable expiration.
He couldn’t see anything through his clouded eyes let alone be able to speak past the giant lump in his throat. The only noise he made between hyperventilating breaths were high pitched whines.
This conclave of emotion made it almost impossible to feel slender arms(of a 23-year old woman.) scooping him up and into their embrace. Faint senses were returning to him as he rocked back and forth. Though his own tears stained his face, he could feel new ones splashing down to his face as they caught in strands of his hair and fell down to his cheeks.
Sensations he had only read about in fiction books as a small child he was feeling for the first time. A hand rubbing his back in circles. A pair of lips pressed against his forehead and a low hum that shot endorphins throughout his little body.
There was no body heat to keep him warm. No heartbeat to listen to. The bits of fabric he had gripped with his tiny fists were just his imagination. This couldn’t be really happening. He may as well have slipped on a VR headset…..
FUCK
Another pathetic sob expelled from him as he was hugged tighter.
”It…*sniffle* ….hurts,” he chocked out.
”I know dear,” she comforted.
Their embrace lasted hours? Weeks? Months? It was impossible to tell and frankly he was too tired to care. Though their embrace had ended he never left her side. He laid his head in her lap like a sad puppy.
”Why didn’t you tell me,” he asked seemingly to the blades of grass he was staring at.
”About what,” an angelic voice questioned from above.
Everything. He wanted to say. “About Grandpa,” he said instead. “Why didn’t you warn me about him?”
There was a bit of silence before she spoke. “I didn’t think I had to warn you about the 110 YEAR OLD,” she exclaimed. “The last time I ever saw him was the day you were born. After I gave birth to you, they got you all cleaned up and handed you back to me. You were the most precious thing I had ever seen. I knew from the moment I held you I would never be capable of loving something as much as I loved you.”
“But then my father walked in ever since I had told him I was pregnant I couldn’t get two words out of him in a day. No matter what I said or did I don’t think he ever got over the shock of it all. He walked over to me and held out his arms to hold you. I thought that maybe this would be the moment we were going to reconcile. He stood there holding you, he looked at you and then at me back at me said ‘I’m sorry,’ and walked away. That was the last time I ever saw either of you. My mother came in after him telling me that ‘everything was alright now,’ and ‘we can forget this whole mess ever happened.’ Only thing I ever heard after that was G.U.N agents coming to the door saying he was in prison,” she concluded.
”Why would he keep my last name the same if he didn’t want me to be found,” little Ivo sat up to ask.
”I couldn’t tell you,” she admitted. Maybe he was eventually going to bring you back into the family? Maybe he just wanted to keep track of you? I honestly don’t know.” I do know that I certainly didn’t name you Ivo, those bitch ass nun’s named you. They came in hours later while I was still in so much pain.
”So did we have a name picked out, the nun asked.”
”Iv…Oh,” she groaned.
”Ok it’s your baby,”
“That stupid,” little Ivo protested.
“Yeah well,” She laughed. “It’s not the worst name you could’ve been given,” she gave him a knowing look. “Sage was a nickname your dad gave me,”
”What’s your real name,” he questioned.
“It’s Bertha,” she stated.
Little Ivo tried his best to hold back his laughter but ultimately failed falling into a fit of giggles. She gladly joined in laughing in hysterics as thy both fell down in the grass. They laid their together staring up at the stars in comfortable silence.
”Am I dead,” little Ivo broke the silence with a small voice barely above a whisper.
Sage looked over to her boy still so little and innocent. But he wasn’t a little boy he was a grown man who had lived a whole life learning he wasn’t capable of love.
”By all accounts yes,” she spoke matter of factly. “Though it’s always hard to tell with you,” she stated.
They went back to their comfortable silence staring at the stars as mother and son. Maybe not everything between them had been resolved but they could wait for tonight. For tonight they were a mother and son stargazing together.
______________________________________
”Wow my first bandiks,” a twelve year old Ivo yelled running through a gym, weaving through other students pitiful excuses for science fair projects. He had wanted to look his best for the fair so he had dressed in a red dress shirt, black tie, and black slacks.
“Slow down Ivo,” his now elderly mother cautioned. His mother’s once shiny blonde hair was now snow white peeking out of her big brimmed green hat. It matched the cardigan she wore over her pink dress with white trim.
Young Ivo raced back to his mother grabbing a chair from the edge of the gymnasium. He sat it down in front of his table and eagerly patted the seat for his mother to sit down.
The 10 year old proudly stood in front of his trifold. A motionless rounded red robot and yellow squared robot lay on the table.
”What is the number one problem with adolescents of a similar age range as myself?” Little Ivo paused for the audience of one.
”They’re awful, unlike my far superior self these halfwit prepubescent trolls only care about absurdities such as sports and dolls. But my companion robots Orbot and Cubot respectively are a perfect machine. Without a soul these robots are free from pitiful human emotions excitement, sadness ……judgement. Though you as the judges unfortunately carry these emotions but even with your minuscule brains you’ll be able to conclude that this is the greatest project you’ll ever have the privilege to judge,” he flourished.
His mother grinned giving him as big of an applause as her weary hands could give him.
If only she had been there that faithful day.
”Manners Ivo,” Sister Who Cares chided as the robots approached them.
”It appears your shoe is untied Professor Helix allow me,” Orbot stated mechanically.
”How helpful,” the professor exclaimed.
It was all young Ivo could’ve hoped for so what if this was the fourth boarding school he’d been sent to after being expelled from all the previous. All his time alone gave him what he craved most positive accolades and two loyal lackeys. Not even that flying pizza slice could sway his good mood
Flying pizza slice?
The slice smacked Ivo square in the face. The exorbitant amount of grease on the reheated cafeteria pizza caused the slice to slide down his face and stick to his new shirt before flopping down to splat on the gym floor spraying grease all over his shoes.
Of course the triangular signature Italian dish doesn’t produce the capability of flight. The giggling by a group of mouth breathers caught his attention as well as helpful companion.
Cubot whisked over to the slice by Ivo’s feet picking it up and blinking at it a few times. “Hey you dropped your lunch, the square robot shouted making the delinquents laugh even harder.
“Ah you got a problem chewing with your mouth closed allow me.” Cubot hopped onto a table to be eye level to the one holding an empty plate. He grabbed the boy by his collar and shoved the slice into his open mouth. The boy gagged as Cubot shook his head up and down in attempt to get him to chew.
The other boys tried to pull the robot away but they were being lifted away. “Interfering with a task is bad you will have to be punished. Orbot spoke devoid of emotion. “Seats spotted for time out wait here and think about what you’ve done,” Orbot spoke as he placed each kid in a basketball hoop.
Screams echoed through the gymnasium from children and adults. As the two robots made their way back to Ivo who cheered them on. However, just before they could make it back to their creator a burly SRO officer stood in their way.
”What’s the prob officer,” Cubot asked before both robots were tazed frying their circuits and leaving them limp and charred.
”Noooo,” Young Ivo cried racing toward his robots that were smoking so much the sprinklers set off erupting the gym into more chaos.
“Give’m back,Young Ivo desperately punched and kicked against the grown man but it was no use. “They’re mine,” Young Ivo whined, “ They’re my friends.” He could barely see anything with the room spinning in his emotions as the man turned to face him.
“These,” the officer waved the lifeless robots in the air, “are nothing but scraps of metal.”
The officer walked away leaving Young Ivo on his knees numb to the chaos around him.
”They seem like very sweet robots,” Sage beamed as she held the frozen in time robots.
”They were too chatty,” Young Ivo remarked seemingly loosing his initial spark. “All badniks afterwards would be made without the ability to speak.” He made his way out of the gym.
”Oh we’re walking again, hold up,” his mother called after him.
______________________________________
”The boy’s a menace,” Sister Whatever yelled.
The 13 year old turned his head to face the locked office door where a very hotheaded headmistress and some military goons were speaking.
“Keep your voice down, Sister he’s right outside,” the commanding officer attempted to calm.
”You’re criticizing me that - that devil child,” she spat. “Just destroyed a bell tower over a hundred years old.”
“G.U.N will cover the damages in full,” he attempted to reason again.
”Oh of course that’s your solution to everything to just throw money at everything. When St. Paul’s uniforms all got ty dyed. When St. Andrews football field went up in flames. When St. Mark’s SRO officer went missing.”
”I don’t appreciate what you’re insinuating Sister,” the commanding officer glared.
”Those are just facts what I’m insinuating is that the next school you throw him in be an institution.” She stated.
The commanding officer stood up from where he was seated causing the rest of his squad to stand at attention. For a moment it appeared like he was going to retort back the same amount of fire and brimstone the headmistress had.
“Please send over all of Ivo Robotnik’s files as of this moment he is no longer a ward of the state, but a ward of G.U.N
The four soldiers all left the office in a perfect march and if they heard the headmistress mutter under her breath, “may God have mercy on your souls,” their faces did not reflect it.
The four officers turned to face Ivo still sitting in his chair now attempting to not make eye contact for fear of punishment.
”Stephens bring the car around, Reynolds get a G.E.D test scheduled, and Mathers email all the top colleges and tell them we have a child prodigy to the highest bidder. Dismissed.” The three less decorated soldiers turned on their heel and marched in perfect cadence toward the exit.
The commanding officer crouched down to Ivo’s eye level. “Hello Ivo, my name is Commander Walters.” He held out his hand for the boy to shake but the attempt at physical contact made him recoil more. The commander took the hint, putting his hands up defensively and backing away.
“Well no need to stick around this poor excuse for a school,” he remarked. “Shall we,” he gestured for Ivo to follow him.
The Commander was clearly after something from Ivo. More government spending, the ability to parade him around like a freak show. In Ivo’s short life he had learned that human beings were purely selfish creatures only looking for themselves and their own desires. This decorated doormat smiling at him was no different. Still he was the first person of any authority to defend him and for that he begrudgingly went with him.
”Are you hungry,” Commander Walter’s asked as they made their way to the car, “I know a great authentic Italian place.
”Olive Garden,” his mother questioned looking around the chain restaurant they sat in.
“Well when you’re here you’re family,” the teen Ivo remarked grabbing a handful of breadsticks. “You know something I overheard Walters say to one of those Major what’s his names makes a lot more sense now.” he commented.
”What?”
”I failed the Robotniks once I will not do it again.”
______________________________________
Unlike in his coma Ivo grew to not care much for the time that passed by. He could’ve been here with his mother for weeks, months, years but he didn’t care although he could do without these triggering memories.
“We at this prestigious university are pleased to present Dr. Ivo Robotnik with his third P.H.D.” the president of the university beamed. The 24 year old sneered at the crowd of no nothing underlings. Their smug grins of sponsorship money paying off.
He snatched the diploma from the university president a Mini-Nik dutifully following behind him. He gave a brief nod to the audience before attempting to walk away.
”Ahem,” the university president cleared his throat, “aren’t you going to say something Doctor,” he questioned gesturing to both the microphone and the audience.
He was going to ignore the decrepit scholar he really was but the “oh shit please don’t do anything crazy,” look on Commander Walters face was too good to pass up.
“Why yes Mr. President I would like to say a few words,” he grinned wickedly eying Walters as the commander now looked up and down seemingly praying to any deity he could think of.
”Hello socialites, scholars, and members of the press,” he began. I’m sure you’re all anxious to hear about the poor little orphan child prodigy that was thrown out of 7 boarding schools and had all of his juvenile records expunged by your tax dollars at work right there,” he pointed at the squad of G.U.N. soldiers.
“Don’t they look excited to be glorified babysitters,” that earned him a small chuckle from the crowd which only fueled his ego. “I’ll tell you what got me here,” he yanked the mic from its holder and walked very long strides across the stage. “information.”
“The ability to bypass human contact,” he waved a free hand to show off his gloves. “Yet being able to find the information hidden in plain sight.”
”See while your feeble minds have been distracted by my incredible way with words my baby,” he pointed to the Mini-Nik, “has been gathering incredibly detailed information about you.”
“This gentleman in the tie that clashes with his socks. Well he couldn’t ask his wife to help him pick out his tie because she left him for her jazzercise instructor.”
“And that lady in the ugly pantsuit back there hasn’t brushed her teeth in four months.”
”And well we’re to begin on our members of the press back there…”
”Ok We’re done here,” Commander Walters leaped on stage to try and shield Ivo from the angry crowd and pressing journalists.
”Wait, wait I didn’t even get to tell them about the university president’s STD.” The crowd pauses momentarily.
”You should get tested girl,” the doctor yells to the president’s wife. “Love your hat,” he remarks as a faithful photographer takes the pinnacle photo of Commander Walters holding back the university president from chocking out the doctor
“G.U.N Blunders Keeping Orphan Genius at Bay,” his mother read the headline in young adult Ivo’s apartment. “A little wordy don’t you think,” she asked her son fidgeting with a Rubik’s cube.
“That wasn’t even the worst part about that tabloid article,” he mused. “ Once word got out that I had no family to speak of every con artist in the world sent letters, emails, phone calls, I kid you not one time a pigeon to tell me that they were a long lost relative.”
Not daring to make eye contact with his mother the question he’d been wanting to ask since he first accepted that this figure deep in his subconscious was his mother. His voice shook.
”How come I never knew you?”
Sage took a deep breath and looked back at the magazine. “When I first saw this magazine in the grocery store I fainted,” she spoke softly and clearly. “An upsetting scene for those around me I’m sure. I grabbed as many copies as I could and probably looked like a crazy person asking the new stock boy to tell me if they get anymore in.”
“I stared at this magazine for days. From the moment I held you I never stopped thinking about you. Anytime I saw a boy your age I would wonder if he was mine. Having to get up everyday not knowing if you were alive or dead, if you were full or starving, if you were loved or..”
“And then I saw this picture and I knew it was you, those eyes and that smile they’re James’ I never thought I’d see them again.”
“When did you find out he had died,” Younger Ivo asked.
“Right before the war started, I was walking home taking the longer route that passed his family’s home and saw a blue star hanging in the window,” she began to cry, “that’s how I knew that my love was never coming back and our little family would never all be together.
She sat and cried awhile before Ivo interrupted.
”Um, blue stars are just that they’re serving in the war,” he stated.
She paused mid wiping tears from her eyes, “What?”
“Gold stars mean dead, blue stars are just there.”
”That can’t be right,”
“I have an IQ of 300 I think I can remember military star meanings.”
”First of all don’t talk back to your mother like that. Second, obviously someone is blue when they’re dead and when they’re serving there’s still a glimmering gold chance of a miracle.”
“I’m not saying it makes sense, I’m saying I have an eidetic memory and spent decades surrounded by military goons.”
“Well we’ll just have to agree to disagree,” she stated matter of factly.
”¡Ay Dios Mío!”
______________________________________
”Oh how festive,” the elderly woman cooed at the decorations.
“I thought we were going through significant moments of my life,” he questioned. “What I had for breakfast that morning was more significant than being forced to attend some veterans event.”
A dining hall in G.U.N’s base in Virginia had now been converted into a reception center to host local veterans. The hall and its attendees were all clad and in a patriotic red, white, and blue. Despite being in his 30’s at this party’ he looked like someone’s emo teenager forced to socialize.
G.U.N’s agents were so strange to Ivo. At best they feared him and at worst were completely exhausted on his efforts to make the organization more efficient. He detested their small talk about the latest sporting event or their picture perfect families. It made him sick ,but apparently it looked good to have one of G.U.N. top scientists attending charity events.
He attempted to break away from the crowd out to the smoking area to get a better signal on his pad. Maybe he could have his babies come in and create a diversion so he could get back to his work.
”Had to get away from them too I see,”
Ivo ignored the old voice and typed away he just left from forced small talk he wouldn’t be so easily roped back in.
”Ah right came out here for quite probably sensitive to the noise and touch like me.”
This caught his attention and briefly looked at the man out of the corner of his eye. He couldn’t point out many prominent features about him. A part from the glaringly obvious fact that he was in a wheelchair and missing both legs below the knee.
“The headphones and the gloves,” the older man clarified. “I got these earplugs for it no matter how much newfangled therapy they push on me I still have trouble with loud noises.”
“Uh huh,” Ivo muttered.
The veteran rolled a little closer much to Ivo’s annoyance. “Those were some pretty sweet moves you had back there,” the stranger complimented.
Ivo had been bolder in the beginning of the festivities dancing out on the empty floor. It was purely to stop the pure torture that was everyone else’s dancing.
”I had some pretty good moves before the incident now I’m only a slightly worse dancer,” he chuckled.
“I would always dance by myself though until I met-“
”Excuse me,” a waste of breath made them both turn around.”Could I get a picture of you two for G.U.N’s monthly magazine. You know you two almost look like you could be-“
“Ahhhh,” the maggot screamed as his camera was blasted to bits by a badnik.
”No in fact, I’m going to use my Leeeeggggsss to walk away.”
”Robotnik,” Commander Walters called for him as he forced his way through the crowd back out through the front doors.
Ivo did his best to ignore the people around him. He cared very little for what Uncle Sam’s boys and girls thought of him.
”What a freak,” one voice said.
”Good riddance,” said another.
”Who did you say that was,” he recognized as the old man who was talking to him.
”Trust me,” one of Walters lackeys remarked. “ You don’t want to know.”
“Why would it bring us here of all places, Ivo pondered a loud to the now empty hall. The only thing of substance was that he never had to go to another veterans event ever again.
“Maybe we just needed a dance break,” his mother commented making her way over to the pictures hanging on the wall.
”I suppose the music selection wasn’t abysmal,” the doctor mused. “You should’ve seen Walters face when I broke out my-“
*Crash*
The sound of broken glass tore Ivo from his train of thought as he rushed over to his mother.
”Mom!” “Are you ok, What happened!”
The elderly woman hyperventilated her fragile bones shivering.
“Here,” he said guiding his mother over to a chair on the other side of the hall. “You’re alright,” he attempted to comfort though having very little experience he patted her head mechanically.
Between shaky breaths she was starting to get syllables out.
Tha- hi- Tha- your-
Ivo walked back towards the photo that caused his mother such distress. ‘How dare a photographic remnant make his maternal superior upset. He should’ve killed that photographer instead of just his camera. He’ll destroy the photo by any means necessary,’ he thought scowling.
He picked up the pitiful piece of photo paper and held it to the light prepared to eliminate in a grand display.
But all that rage came to a screeching halt when he saw the person in the photo. That jaw, those eyes, that hair its… his. But it wasn’t a picture of him this man was in a wheelchair missing both legs below the knee. In the light he could see that there was writing on the back.
Sargent James Carey Vietnam Veteran 1984.
Ivo’s breath became short as well as he walked back towards his mother. His poor mother now sat with tears slowly streaming down her face. He placed a hand on her shoulder partly to comfort her and partly to keep himself upright. His other hand gripped the photo tightly as if it would disappear.
“M-om,” his voice trembled. “Is this..” for all his genius he couldn’t find the words. His mother looked up at him her eyes gleaming with tears. She gave him a weak nod that made Ivo’s knees buckle beneath him. He slumped against the wall next to his mom his head resting in her lap overcome with a wave of emotions. Sadness, regret, anger. G.U.N had everyone’s DNA and they… Walters never told him anything.
He looked back at the photo. “Fuck the government,” he muttered.
______________________________________
”AN ASSISTANT!” The Robotnik now in his 40’s yelled. He smacked a cup of pens off the Commander’s desk for emphasis.
Commander Walters sat back in his chair the decades of Robotnik’s outburst no longer phasing him. “The board decided that it’s either an assistant slash bodyguard or we have no choice but to let you go. They will be personally selected by me and the rest of the board.”
”I’m getting too old,” Walter began.
”Understatement of the year,” Robotnik interrupted.
”To go running after you and cover your tracks when you tick someone off,” Walters finished.
Robotnik glared at Walters seething at his disrespect.
”Though we will be choosing your agent. They will answer directly to you. There won’t be any hidden cameras or wires. And of course an extra person means a boost to your funding.
Robotnik raised an eyebrow and his lips curled into a smirk. “Ding, ding Walters you found the magic words. Money talks and so does complete control of another person,” he chuckled darkly.
“Eh Robotnik-“ Walters attempted to reason
”Send in the first victim I mean volunteer, Monday morning,” Robotnik said his coat flourishing behind him as he exited Walters office. ‘This will be fun,’ he thought to himself.
”What were your assistants like before Stone,” His mother asked as they spent their time vandalizing Commander Walters office.
”Oh your typical bumbling assistant,” Robotnik began coloring in Walters teeth with a sharpie. “Each of those slugs had horrid habits chewing gum, arriving 20 seconds late, putting oat milk in my coffee.”
”And not nearly as good looking,” Sage added poking scissors into the couch.
“Exact-“ he caught himself and grumbled which made his mom giggle.
“How many did you go through,”
“275,”
“Yeesh,”
”I was looking for any excuse to fire Stone I really wanted to hit 300.”
“You couldn’t find anything wrong with him,”
”Walters said I couldn’t fire someone for being annoyingly perfect.”
”Aww,” his mother cooed.
He threw a paper ball at her smirking.
She gasped dramatically, “Oh Yeah,” she threw a paper ball back at him. They went on like this for days.
______________________________________
Sage gasped at Ivo’s old lab. “Wow look at all this.”
“Yes I’m quite impressive,” the egotistical doctor remarked.
“No wonder you always wore sunglasses and goggles all the time,” she commented tapping a test tube.
“Yes after one too many eye flushing emergencies you’re going to learn lab safety.”
“Kinda big for one person,” she said.
”All this equipment can’t exactly fit in a cardboard box,” he laughed before being cut short by a hand placed gently on his shoulder. The same way she had when they first met briefly before portobello purgatory. He looked down at his mother a soft smile folded under her wrinkles.
”I’m glad you found someone to share it with.”
Robotnik loathed his 275th assistant. The nervous wreck always stayed ten paces behind him per his request and threat that if he got any closer his badniks were programmed to fire at will.
Today was a mandatory test of his newest upgrades to his babies. As if they deserved to be seen by those deep pocketed low brows and nepo baby generals. But after the third cancellation for him contracting pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis. Walters told him to put down the ash or they were cutting his funding.
“Why don’t you make yourself useful slug, he barked. “Try and find me a decent cup of coffee in the next ten minutes and if it’s not perfect you’re fired.”
Agent what’s his face yelped and ran off. Robotnik entered the presentation field scanning the select crowd he recognized most of them but had only bothered to learn two of their names. One he knew as General Smith aka General Blowhard who apparently had a new assistant. He appeared like any G.U.N. agent clean pressed suit, neatly groomed but there was something in his eyes something dark a hunger that he was better than this. Those eyes darted over to him noticing he was staring. The doctor turned away clearing his throat to begin his presentation.
”Ahem Gentlemen I don’t want to be here you don’t want to be here so let’s get this over with.” A swarm of badniks flew up from behind the crowd dutifully lining up behind their creator.
“My darling machines have always been better than the average human being and now are better than every human being besides moi.Yes I speak French.”
”What’s this doohickey got over any one of my soldiers,” General Blowhard yelled.
“Besides the ability to not spit saliva and have veins pop out of their neck when they give orders to each other,” The doctor smirked.
The agent standing next to the general lost his professional composure laughing at Robotnik’s joke. The crowd turned to look at the agent as he straightened back up. “Sorry,” he muttered.
“How about a little wager General,” Robotnik asked emboldened with an ego boost. My badniks versus your soldiers in an obstacle course if you win I’ll go back to the drawing board. If my babies win I want…” he pointed into the crowd grinning darkly. “Your agent!”
The crowd of stooges looked to each other utterly confused. “Robotnik you already have an assistant,” Walters interrupted. Said assistant came running up to the stage to Robotnik’s outstretched hand placing the coffee cup there.
Robotnik took a big swig and spit it back in 275’s face. “Not anymore,” he spat. “We’ll make a trade General you can take this sniveling sorry excuse for an agent it better matches your level of intelligence.
“Robotnik this is childish,” Walters chastised
“No no no Commander,” General Blowhard interrupted. “Me and my boys ain’t ever been one to back down from a challenge. He leaped down from the crowd.
”SQUAD! FALL IN!” Six soldiers lined up behind him. With the agent standing dutifully beside the general. “That means you pretty boy,” he side eyed his agent. “You ain’t gonna be a damn damsel in distress on the sidelines.”
The agent swiftly filed in with the rest of the men. “FOWARD! MARCH!” They marched towards the training grounds. Robotnik punched in a command on his control gloves ordering his badniks to follow them. “Seatbelts everyone,” he addressed the rest of the crowd. “We’re going on a field trip.”
The training ground was two miles away. While everyone else was stuck getting their shoes muddy Robotnik was content to sit atop his badnik flying over every one. He even resulted to paying pog with his drones waiting for everyone else to get there.
“SQUAD! HALT!” The General barked. “Alright men fall out and wait in the center of the course. Your objective is to make it to the exit without being captured by one of these drones. The drones surrounded the training course apart from one that carried Robotnik to a watchtower for a perfect view. Three lined up above the men mimicking a traffic light as they descended in their flash of color
*Red*
*Yellow*
*Green*
All the soldiers were quick to rush out of the center three were caught instantly being snatched up by the drones and thrown out of the training course. Just a few seconds later the drones had another soldier backed into a corner and another soldier stuck in a tire. The last soldier made it almost 3 feet farther than the rest before having his camouflage(and uniform) stripped away.
With all six soldiers left groaning outside of the training ground that only left the agent who hadn’t moved from the center. Robotnik watched him with an intense curiosity. The agent took one final glance at the drone’s surrounding him before making his way to the exit. He expertly dodged, distracted, and disabled the badniks coming his way. It was as natural as breathing to him it merely took the flip of a switch.
” 傑出した" (kesshutsu shita)“ the doctor exclaimed.
The agent made it all the way to the exit but before he crossed the line he stopped and took three steps backwards. As the last badnik approached him, the agent held up his hand to pat it on the head.
”Great job buddy,” he patted. “You caught me, the doctor must be very proud.” The badnik picked up the agent and placed him gently next to the wounded soldiers.
”Well, well look at that, Robotnik cheered as he floated down atop his badnik. “To the suprise of absolutely no one I am victorious and now I have my prize,” landing and grabbing the agent’s arm.
”Now wait just a moment Robotnik,” the Commander Walters interrupted stepping between them.
“Excuse me, I knocked over the tin spaceship, I landed the ring around the milk bottle, and I sunk a ping pong ball into the cup of a half dead goldfish so I will be claiming my prize.”
”Agent Stone do you have anything to say about this,” the Commander questioned.
’So that was his name,’ the doctor thought.
“I have no objections to this arrangement Commander Walters,” Agent Stone spoke without a hint of hesitation.
”Ugh Fine, I’ll have Agent Stone reassigned to you, Doctor, Commander Walters gave in.
”Fine,” General Blowhard objected. “You’re going to play into this game of his.”
”Do you want to stand here arguing with him,” Walters questioned looking over at the pair. Agent Stone stood at perfect attention while Dr.Robotnik made mocking facial expressions at the general. “Just take Myers,” the commander instructed.
“Who?”
”You’re agent before Stone.”
”Oh, Ew.”
Dr.Robotnik walked toward his car with his now 258th agent and a dutiful badnik following behind them.
”You’ll be cleaning every last badnik you destroyed in your little show,” the doctor filled the silence.
”Of course sir,”
“How are you at making coffee?”
Agent Stone opened up Robotnik’s car door for him. “Exceptional Doctor.”
Robotnik smiled before chopping the agent in his neck. “Left yourself open,” he laughed getting in the car. And when Agent Stone recovered and got into the driver’s seat Robotnik could swear he saw a smile across the agent’s face.
Ivo looked down at the latte sitting in front of him with a lovely latte art of his beloved eggies. Looking back at his mother he placed his own hand on top of hers.
“Me too,” he said softly.
______________________________________
”NOOOOOO, come on give me exploding in the crab over this piece of shiitake planet.”
“Bleugh,” Sage poked the giant fungi with her cane. “I’ve always hated mushrooms nasty things.”
“Well then you certainly would’ve loathed trying to survive here and for what just to end up in a full body cast drinking through a straw a few days later. No technology, No other food, No..” he paused when he felt something against his foot.
Rock Agent Stone the only thing that kept him from going completely insane in this hellscape. He sat down against a large mushroom and held the rock close to him. He traced the edges in the formation overwhelmed by the sensations of holding something Stone-esque.
As much as he enjoyed this time with the mother he never knew there was someone back on earth he both knew too much and too little about. Everyone he ever knew before Stone had been disposable. Hardly any stuck around long and those that did had a prior obligation. He had a problem with everyone and everyone had a problem with him.
He was a fortress of solitude and then there was Stone. The enigma of a man he was, he tried every thing in his power to intimidate and degrade him but Stone took it in stride. Ivo always had a way of explaining away things he refused to understand.
That gnawing feeling in his stomach whenever Stone was gone too long- a reaction to the disruption of his routine
The twinkle in Stone’s eye when he received the rare compliment by the doctor - a trick of the light mixed with toxic fumes.
Stone’s unwavering loyalty going above and beyond the call of duty to make the doctor’s life easier- Simple. He was a sycophant.
Ivo may not like people but he was damn good at reading them. And his barnacle was an open book. He wanted the same thing Ivo wanted power and naturally gave his loyalty to the smartest most powerful person in the world for his own personal gain. Right?
”It’s ok,” his mother interrupted his thoughts.
”What,” how long had he been sitting here.
”It’s ok to love him, Ivo,” she clarified sitting next to him. He attempted to say something anything but his mind came to a screeching halt. A warmth rushing to his ears and cheeks.
”I love him too, after everything he’s done for you I will be forever grateful,” she said.
Ivo sighed resting his head on his mother’s shoulder. “You know you look like an old lady but on the inside you’re still just a teenager.”
”Well many studies have found that childhood trauma can stunt our physical and emotional development.”
______________________________________
Ivo stood in the café/safe house entertaining himself turning his jacket from red to green over and over again. Despite the distraction intrusive thoughts still bubbled to the surface.
“What if he doesn’t like me,” he asked aloud to no one in particular.
“Are you serious right now,” Sage answered sipping one of the latte’s that kept appearing. “Look around you, who would do this for anyone they thought of in a casual manner.”
“He had to do something while I was away,” Robotnik reasoned following his mother over to a big display screen.
“What’s this do,” she asked pressing a button that revealed the doctor’s costume designs. Unfortunately, it was an outfit not meant to be seen by anyone.
“Oh Dear,” Sage muttered at her son in a French maid outfit.
“MOTHER! LOOK AWAY!” He flailed trying to both shield her eyes and close the window his face cherry red by the end of it.
______________________________________
“I have a terrible secret, Gabriella,” Juan turned away from his love. Guitars strumming in the background.
”Oh Juan my love for you is stronger than any secret.” She threw herself onto Juan.
”I can not dance,” he hung his head.
”Qué, I must go,” she pushed him off.
“Please don’t go,” he cried.
”I must,” she cried.
La Ulitmá Passion faded into the background as Sage commented on the crab. “It’s not the cleanest space, but at least you’re finally eating something besides protein bars and lattes,” she emphasized poking his stomach.
“Hey I’m trying to work on my latest project.”
”How? We’re in death probably.”
”I did say trying,” he clarified. “I was working on it before grand geezer blew up my life.” He hoisted up the blue robot. “What do you think, an exact replica of that high speed hedgehog to kill him, replace him and then kill his multi colored friends,” he smiled proudly.
”Um it kinda looks a little goofy with that frown,” she responded trying not to sound too disturbed.
Ivo looked back at it then experimentally covered his hand where the Metal Sonic’s mouth was. “Oh that is better much more menacing it is his most annoying feature anyway.” He sat the robot down turning his attention back to the screen. However, as much as he loved the telenovela his heart sunk a little remembering the routine he had built around this episode.
”Gabriella, guitars strum louder as everyone at the party gasped. ”I have learned to dance,” he flourished. “Oh Juan,” Gabriella raced into her lover’s arms.
Ivo stared at the screen not wanting to admit how much he was enjoying this show. “Any idiot can learn how to dance,” he muttered. “Even someone who just had surgery,” he boasted.
He hoisted himself up from his chair. Steadying himself by holding onto the back of the chair. He let go feeling a sense of freedom after months of bed rest. He attempted his first move but tripped on his robe and fell to the floor.
Luckily Stone had arrived back from his errands to hear the thud from the doorway. “Doctor, What happened,” he began to lift him up. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t here sooner the traffic was backed up.”
”Stop your blubbering agent, I’m fine now get out of my way I’m going to dance because I said so and I’m in charge not you.”
Agent Stone’s eyes widened walking towards Robotnik despite his earlier threats. “Don’t make me repeat myself insubordinate-“ his words died in his throat at the sensation of Agent Stone laced his fingers with Robotnik’s.
“If you wanted to dance Doctor I’d be happy to help you,” he smiled softly.
”Stone I have mastered every form of dance, I may have been knocked in the head but those abilities have not left me.”
”Of course Sir, I’m offering purely to help you stabilize yourself during your recovery,” Stone clarified.
Robotnik looked down at his and Sone’s hands together. He listened to the soft guitar strums from the television. “Stone,” he spoke uncharacteristically soft. “I’ve never… danced with anyone before.”
”I’ll take it slow Maestro,” they swayed gently letting the melody guide them there weren’t any big fancy moves just a simple rhythmic rocking. As the song ended Robotnik was the first to let go of their hands, but did allow Stone to walk him back to his chair.
After assuring that Robotnik was settled he finally spoke again, “I have to start preparing your lunch but if there’s any other areas you want assistance with just let me know,” he smiled heading back towards the kitchen area of the crab.
This became their new routine anytime this episode came on by choice or when Agent Stone put it on when Robotnik was being difficult about his physical therapy. The first few times were still a little awkward but they soon became comfortable with each other. And as the months went on their dances were a reflection of Robotnik’s recovery with each dance gaining more complex moves.
”Whoa,” Agent Stone yelped as Robotnik dipped him.
“You’re getting soft agent to have something as simple as me dipping you catch you off guard.
Agent Stone chuckled as he was lifted back up “You always surprise me, Doctor.”
“And you’re still as predictable as-“ he was cut off by Stone placing his hand on Robotnik’s cheek petting his unkempt mustache with his thumb.
“If you wish, he breathed inching towards Robotnik’s face. “I could be less predictable.”
Robotnik let his eyes close only briefly before a piercing alarm broke them apart. The two men stood apart from each other swallowing hard.
“Go eliminate that threat barnacle,” Robotnik coughed heading back to his chair.
Stone’s response wasn’t as immediate letting the silence linger a little longer. “Right away, Sir.” he turned grabbing his jacket and helmet before the automatic door shut.
Robotnik stared blankly at his telenovela, “Predictable,” he muttered.
______________________________________
“Ew, nope,” Ivo commented ripping off the suit his grandfather made him. Unfortunately his stealth suit was underneath. Sage quickly covered her eyes.
“Worse,” he yelled ripping again unveiling his tailored suit Stone put together. “Perfect, now where the hell are we.”
“I guess we’ve made it through your life so this is the end.” Sage pondered as they walked side by side in the white void. There were two singular objects in the distance. There was a large park bench a good ways away from a homemade t-pee made with a star sheet. Inside the tent two small voices could be heard.
”It’s that other stinking hedgehog,” Ivo muttered.
”And little Maria,” Sage whispered. Ivo looked between the tent and his mother. Though everyone seemed to talk with so much love for Maria there was also so much pain even his mother looked at the silhouetted tent with remorse.
”We should give them some privacy,” she said turning to the bench. They sat in comfortable silence watching the kids shadows against the tent only being able to hear every tenth word.
“When did you die,” Ivo asked letting his curiosity take over.
“April 30th 2019, I had just gotten home from my job at the library and laid down for a nap then I was here.”
“Was it… painful.”
”Not at first, not when I got to see my mom again after all those years and was finally able to watch over you. But then the fights my mom and I had growing up were coming back up. And I was able to see what not having a stable home life had caused you.”
“Where’s grandma now,”
“Oh probably in our family home she doesn’t like to travel through life like I do. I told her you were here after the first time but she said ‘come get me when he’s for sure dead.’ I think she’s upset because dad hadn’t been to see her but now that we know he just hadn’t died yet that’s probably where he is now.”
”So no parents and no lover do you just hang out with Maria, she must be pretty great if people are trying to blow up the earth to avenge her death.”
”I uh… I haven’t seen Maria since I’ve been here,” she confessed.”
”Why?”
”Because it’s my fault,” she cried. “If I hadn’t uprooted our family dad wouldn’t have become so overprotective of Maria and he would have never taken her to that facility and… and.”
”And Shadow wouldn’t have had a friend,” Ivo interrupted. “He would have been nothing more than a weapon for G.U.N to use as they please. Certain corrupt members of G.U.N are to blame. Definitely not you!”
“I know what it’s like to live a life as the problem child to have everyone telling you you’re too much and only valuing you for what you can do for them. So if this is the first time you’re hearing this then listen well you’re not a problem and you never were.”
“Oof-“ the air was knocked out of him by a pair of surprisingly strong elderly arms wrapping him up in a hug.
“Thank you, Son.”
”Thank you, Mom”
”For what,” she looked up from the hug.
”For being my Ghost of Christmas past and saving my future,” he smirked.
“So no thanks for the ultimate life form who saved your life.”
The pair broke from their embrace to find Shadow and Maria standing behind them.
”How long have you two been standing there,” Ivo asked pointing his finger at them.
”Long enough for it to get sappy,” Shadow quipped.
“Oh it was sweet Shadow,” Maria countered. “Don’t worry I’m sure your friend Sonic can teach you about it.” Shadow left his arms crossed rolling his eyes. He was about to strike back when he noticed gold flecks flying off of him.
Ivo looked down at his own arms noticing that he had the same gold flakes flying off of him. His mom and Maria’s shared glance told him everything he needed to know. They both stood by their guests pressing their foreheads against their loved one’s. The bodies of Dr. Ivo Robotnik and Shadow the Hedgehog disappeared before the eyes of Bertha “Sage” Robotnik and Maria Robotnik.
”You think they’ll be ok,” Maria asked her aunt.
”With us watching over them they’ll definitely have a fighting chance,” Sage smiled at her niece.
“We better go see Grandpa, the younger girl said.
”Yeah, you’re probably right,” Sage said de aging before the girl’s age back into a 16 year old girl. She nervously fidgeted with her dress. Maria took her aunt’s hand to comfort her.
”We’ll do it together,” she said.
With a new found confidence she walked hand in hand with her niece, “So tell me all about this Shadow friend of yours.”
______________________________________
“This whole rising from the dead shtick is getting old.” Robotnik muttered hoisting himself off the dirty floor.
”No hedgehog in sight,” he pondered, “Must’ve woken up somewhere else.”
Ivo took in his surroundings looked like a lab but definitely not of earth. Oh joy another planet though at least this one seemed to have decent technology. The perfect place to begin work on my greatest creation yet.
PROJECT SAGE