Chapter Text
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Uzi: Thank you all for coming.
V, wearing a hospital gown: When I heard you couldn't get laid, I dropped everything and came straight here.
Uzi: Well, I couldn't imagine anyone else being part of the "Fuck Uzi Task Force".
N: Yeah, I interpreted that in a different way.
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V: You need a hobby.
N: I have a hobby!
V: Fawning over Uzi isn’t a hobby.
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N: What did V do this time?
Uzi: More like WHO did V do this time?
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V: The best way to gain someone's undying loyalty is by saving them from a perilous situation.
N: So you're just gonna wait until Uzi is in danger and save them?
V: Of course not, I'm going to create a situation that puts them in danger and then save them.
N: ...
N: You're insane.
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*Uzi and N flirting with each other yet again*
V: And you two are sure you're not dating?
Uzi: 100%.
N: Of course not! Why would you think that?
V: I wonder why that possibility would even cross my mind, N. I fucking wonder.
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N: Why is everyone so obsessed with top or bottom? Honestly, I’d just be excited to have a bunk bed.
V:
V: I'm gonna tell them.
Uzi: Don't you dare.
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V, bursting into the room: You two are having sex!
N, not looking up from their book: Really? Uzi, why didn’t you tell me? I would have put my book down.
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Uzi: *is wearing silk pants* How does this look?
N: Like its slips on and off really easily.
Uzi:
N: No, I didn't mean it like that-
V: We know what you meant.
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V: I hope you have an explanation for this.
N: We have three, actually!
Uzi: Pick your favourite.
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