Chapter Text
“Zack.”
Normally, he would be really happy to chat with Angeal, thrilled even! But that tone of voice probably means he doesn’t want to talk to Angeal right now. And the elevator to leave the SOLDIER floor is past Angeal and there’s nothing behind Zack but other SOLDIER’s rooms.
Angeal has his arms crossed and a half-frown. He’s still in his usual 1st Class SOLDIER uniform, buster sword on his back, and there’s just the slightest hint of something not-good in his expression.
Something that probably does not bode well for him.
So Zack laughs, trying to act like nothing's wrong. Because he was pretty sure nothing was wrong until now. “Hey, man! What’s up?”
The hallway is deserted right now, not even a random SOLDIER wandering back to their apartment for the night. Just the super gray metallic walls and metal flooring that’s everywhere in Shinra HQ.
Angeal’s half-frown doesn’t go anywhere. Not good. He tries to think of everything he could have done wrong. Did he forget to submit his last mission report? No, he definitely submitted that because Lazard told him he needed to correct some grammar. Did he accidentally tell Genesis that Loveless is super boring and confusing? No.
Not recently.
“Today is the last day of the SCS program sign up.” Angeal starts, arms still crossed. “And it occurred to me that you hadn’t mentioned signing up for it. After I very explicitly said you needed to.”
Oh. No.
It feels like he jumped off a three hundred foot drop and had nowhere to land.
Did he sign up for it?
He tries to remember if he had signed up for the Shinra Counseling Services program, the whole project Angeal has spent months and months getting started and approved. And he comes up blank.
“Yeah!” He says out loud, laughing like he’s completely unbothered. “I totally did that!”
Angeal raises a singular eyebrow and he clearly does not believe Zack at all. “Really?”
“Yeah!” Zack waves a hand, laughing. “Super easy peasy! Just how you designed it! Had so little problems signing up that I didn’t even remember to tell you bout it!”
Did he sign up? Can he check that? Would Angeal know if he didn’t?
“So, if I said you needed to have confirmation of an appointment by dinnertime—” Angeal glances at his PHS and then goes back to Zack with an expectant look. “In less than two hours. You would have it?”
“Yeah!” Zack is such a total liar. “Totally!”
Confirmation of an appointment? An appointment that Zack doesn’t have?
It’s fine. He’ll just go to dinner and admit he messed up and Angeal will sigh but it’ll all be fine. How upset could Angeal possibly be about it?
Angeal narrows his eyes because he knows Zack. Zack tries to look calm and chill. “I just hope you know that I would be very disappointed in you if you forgot and just lied to me.”
Oh boy.
He forgot. And he lied.
He’s really messed up this time. He doesn’t want to see the Disappointed Angeal Look ™ ever again. It’s been months since he’s gotten one!
The last time was because he slightly forgot to submit some reports for a couple weeks. He wrote them, but he forgot to submit them. And nothing could ever replicate the fear and sadness he felt the moment Angeal turned to him after observing the stack of reports and leveling a disappointed look at him. Zack had almost cried. Actual tears.
“I took care of it!” Zack says, like a liar. “Like ages ago, man. No Disappointed Angeal Looks ™ today!”
He did not take care of it at all. He totally forgot about it. Entirely. Completely forgot.
Angeal still looks entirely unconvinced, already looking like he’s on the way to being disappointed.. “If you say so. I’m going to go make dinner. Don’t be late again.” And he goes back into his apartment, the door closing behind him.
Oh man.
He doesn’t have a confirmation. Because he doesn’t have an appointment!
Zack waits until he’s in the elevator to freak out and panic just in case Angeal was listening with SOLDIER hearing and all.
He has to brace himself against the meal wall of the elevator and try not to freak out.
Are there probably cameras in here? Sure, but he has bigger problems to worry about than if the Turks are watching him have a breakdown right now.
How did he forget that! He had a little yellow sticky note with it on his bathroom mirror! For months! He even put a second one up after the humidity from showers made it not sticky anymore. But eventually it just became bathroom decor instead of a reminder.
He smacks his forehead with his hand. “Angeal’s gonna be so disappointed in me. I am so dead.”
Beyond Angeal being let down by him, he might even be sad or hurt. Angeal put a lot of time and effort into getting the SCS program set up. Like an entire year working with Shinra admins and Lazard and upper Shinra management to get approval for counseling services for the Shinra military personnel.
Insanely long back and forth email chains with Lazard, admins, and even a couple times Professor Hojo arguing about why it was important. It’s been a whole nightmare.
And Zack knows he’s proud of it, they even had a little celebration the day the president signed his approval for the program. Angeal gave a whole speech, a super moving and heartfelt one too, all about how much he cares about this program and helping people.
He sighs and thunks his head against his fist again.
He can’t let Angeal down after all the hard work he put into this. And Zack’s pretty sure even Genesis actually signed up.
Wait no. He can just go sign up right now. It’ll be fine! Today’s the last day to sign up, that’s what Angeal said.
So, he hits the button for the twenty-eighth floor. When the door dings open, he half-runs and half-jogs down the hallway. A couple Shinra personnel glance at him and he waves happily.
It’s all good! He’ll get signed up and it’ll all be fine.
The SCS program office is pretty small considering how big Shinra HQ is and all. He pulls open the two glass doors and strides inside. There’s a waiting room with five seats and a little side table with two magazines on it. Some nice potted plants in the corner and by the entrance. He’s pretty sure Angeal donated them when the office space opened.
Luckily, there’s no one else at the office or in line.
The lady behind the desk, Katie, he remembers from all of Angeal’s meetings to get the program set up. She always wears the exact same gray office outfit except for her hot pink glasses that look like they’re glowing from how bright the pink is. It’s pretty memorable.
“Hi!” Zack says, stopping by the front desk office and leaning against the counter. She looks up, adjusting her hot pink glasses and it’s hard to look her in the eyes because the color is so distracting. “Uh, so I need to sign up for the SCS?”
There’s some pamphlets about mental health on the counter. One’s titled Coping With High Stress & Anxiety: A Practical Guide and another one called The SCS And Insurance Information (with FAQ) .
Katie blinks at him. “Mr. Fair, we’re entirely booked for individual and group therapy for—” She clicks super loudly with her mouse and glances at the computer screen. “Ten months out. You should have signed up ten months ago.”
Zack props himself up with the counter. Angeal is going to kill him. Or worse he’s going to have to admit to Angeal that he lied and didn’t remember to sign up ten months ago and see the disappointed face.
And Genesis will probably film it or something.
He scratches the back of his neck and prays to some kind of higher power. “There’s really nothing? Like at all?”
She looks at him for a second then types really, really loudly on her keyboard and he almost feels like it’s on purpose or something. “Well, there’s couples therapy left, it wasn’t requested as much. There’s room for appointments as soon as next week.”
Thank Gaia.
“That’s something!” He thinks for a second. Oh yeah, Aerith! Even though they don’t really have any problems or anything, he wouldn’t have to admit anything to Angeal. “Uh, how does that work for someone who’s not SOLDIER or anything?”
Katie pauses her typing, to look at him over her glasses. She’s about his mom’s age and sometimes the way she asks questions reminds him of her. “You mean a non-Shinra personnel?”
He nods, hoping he seems really earnest right now.
Katie gives him a look and he’s pretty sure he’s being judged. “Anyone utilizing SCS must be a Shinra employee.”
Zack feels a part of his soul die. Maybe a part of him will just pre-maturely join the Lifestream. “That’s it?”
“The SCS program was designed to help SOLDIER and military operatives,” Katie says, clicking loudly on her keyboard again. “That’s how Mr. Hewley designed it.”
“Right.”
In one short movement, she picks up and holds out a shiny pamphlet titled Shinra Counseling Services: A Full Guide To Getting Started .
Zack is so dead. As he walks out of the SCS office and past Angeal’s giant plant that’s a fruit tree or something, he begins to plan his funeral. Or at least a temporary funeral and thinks about how this dinner might be his last one.
He should message his friends to let them know he’ll be gone soon. And Aerith.
Why did he forget to sign up for that? He promised.
He looks down at the pamphlet.
The first steps to getting help are the hardest. You should be proud of yourself for taking them against the odds. Here is a comprehensive guide of how to best utilize SCS to its full advantage. If you have any questions please contact the SCS Office or the SCS Director Angeal Hewley.
Oh, he is so dead.
“I wasn’t aware puppies could look so depressed.” A very familiar voice says behind him and he turns to see Genesis walking up to him, still in his non-standard red uniform jacket and carrying his fancy sword. Right, he was just coming back from a mission today.
And now Genesis is going to witness his doom at dinner. Great.
Genesis glances sideways at him and gestures loosely at him. “This better not be something that is going to bother Angeal.”
Zack knows his face falls further, guilt hitting him squarely in the stomach. “Well, Angeal’s gonna kill me so yeah he’s going to be involved.”
Genesis makes a face, halfway between concern and annoyance. “Well, I’m sure you deserve whatever you get for what it is you have done. Did you ignore something he told you to do?”
“Yeah.” Zack sighs, wincing as he says it. “Ten months ago.”
Genesis huffs. “Well, your funeral, puppy. Though I’m sure Angeal will forgive you, as he always does due to his bleeding heart. I suppose it’s hard to blame a mindless puppy afterall.”
“Hey!” Zack feels like he could almost cry and maybe he’s close to it. Just imagining Angeal’s face fall when Zack has to tell him that he lied and didn’t sign up makes him want to run away to an impromptu mission in Wutai for weeks. “He told me he was going to be disappointed in me!”
Even Genesis winces at that. Other than Zack, he’s probably the person who’s gotten the most Disappointed Angeal Faces ™. “Oh Goddess, you have truly messed up. Whatever you have done, will it cause Angeal stress?”
Zack hangs his head now. “Yeah, probably.”
Genesis sighs for an unnecessarily long time, shaking his head. “Do I want to know what you have done?”
He starts to open his mouth, then Genesis laughs and pats his shoulder in a way that almost seems like he’s being made fun of. “You know what? I don’t think I want to. Good luck, your fate has been sealed.”
As he walks away, Genesis says over his shoulder, “I’ll watch it all crash and burst into flames tonight at dinner.”
The sound of his footsteps fades.
Zack leans heavily against the wall. “I am so screwed, aren’t I?”
“And!” Zack’s voice is really too loud for an office, but he can’t stop himself. He needs to talk through this before dinnertime. He needs a game plan or something. Anything really. “Angeal said he’d be disappointed in me! Disappointed! The trademarked disappointed look!”
Zack paces back and forth from one end of the super spacious office to the other end. His sword is leaning up against the wall where he dropped it when he walked in a little bit ago. “And I told him I took care of it! So I’ll also have to admit to lying!”
This is a mess. And he can’t blame anyone but himself for it being a mess.
He really should have listened to that little yellow sticky note. And to Angeal.
For the first time since Zack burst into his office, Sephiroth speaks from behind his desk. “I am sure Angeal will not be nearly as upset as you think he would be. Both Genesis and I forget things he tells us. It is not uncommon. Just admit your faults now and correct it. No harm will be done.”
Zack spins around, hands on his head. “Genesis pat my shoulder and said good luck and that my fate was sealed! No Loveless quotes involved!”
Sephiroth looks at him, emotionless for a long moment. “What did you do?” He pauses then adds. “Or not do?”
Zack sighs, both shoulders slumping and hunching over. “Angeal told me to get signed up for that new policy thing he got started, SCS and all. You know what I’m talking about.”
Sephiroth doesn’t even blink and Zack adds, “Ten months ago.”
Sephiroth crosses his arms. “And I assume you did not sign up for it?”
No, he didn’t.
Zack walks by the three chairs in Sephiroth’s office. The standard issued ones unlike Genesis’s office which was way fancier. “I didn’t know it was something I needed to do right then or something! I didn’t realize it had a time limit. And then I had a mission outside of Midgar for a couple days and then I was helping Spikey out—”
Zack paces back and forth again. “Which was helpful and all and then I had a date with Aerith and then I had that mission with the Turks when I got lost below plate for a bit and—”
“How do you remember all of that but not to sign up for an appointment?”
Zack falls heavily into one of the chairs in Sephiroth’s office. It squeaks under his sudden weight. “I don’t know! But the SCS desk lady said they’re entirely booked for ten months! For individual and group sessions! And I almost signed up for the couples but Aerith isn’t a Shinra employee and all.”
There’s a loud ding from Sephiroth’s computer. The annoyingly familiar sound of a new email popping up in his inbox. Sephiroth doesn’t even look at it as he says, “Well. That is a problem.”
He gets the impression Sephiroth is trying to sound sympathetic, but he isn’t always good at that. It’s the effort that matters and he appreciates the attempt.
“I know!” Zack throws his hands up. “And it’s not like I can fake Aerith being a Shinra employee or anything but who else could I ask?”
Zack slides down the seat, until his back is almost on the seat. “I’m going to die at dinner. You and Genesis are going to be witnesses. I guess I have to face my fate in, like, twenty minutes.”
Sephiroth doesn’t say anything. And Zack adds. “I didn’t think it’d be this soon.”
“I doubt it will be worse than the time Genesis and I destroyed one of the training rooms while sparring,” Sephiroth says, grinning just a little bit and yeah, that actually does help a little bit. Zack really thought Angeal was going to end up single after that.
“Still.” Zack says, sadly. “I have a gut feeling, man.”
His PHS buzzes and sadly, he checks it and expects it to be a reminder from Angeal about dinner. A different familiar contact pops up.
Cloud: Guess what? My patrol got canceled tonight. If you’re free after dinner with the 1sts, want to play Chocobo Racers?
Zack is hitting the call button before his brain can even make a fully fledged thought. Please, please, please pick up. Please, buddy. A lot is on the line right now.
“Hello?” Cloud’s voice says through the PHS speaker, a little confused. “Zack?”
“Do you want to go to couples therapy with me?”
Silence.
And continued silence.
He almost checks if his PHS is still working. Then Cloud’s voice finally responds.
“What.”
“Please!” Zack grips his PHS with both hands. “Please, please, please.”
“Shouldn’t you be asking Aerith that?” Cloud sounds completely panicked. “Wait, why do you even need to—I thought you and Aerith were okay?”
“Please please please. I only have a little bit of time or else you’re gonna have to be giving a speech at my funeral here, Cloudy!”
“What does that mean?” Cloud’s voice is slowly getting more and more panicked and louder, the last word is slightly wheezy.
“Please, please, please, I have less than twenty minutes!”
“Twenty minutes until what?!”
“My funeral!” Zack says, panicked now.
There’s a bunch of static for a second and it sounds like Cloud dropped his PHS. “What are you talking about? You’re not having a funeral!”
From the corner of his eyes, he can see Sephiroth covering his face with a hand. He’s not sure if it’s because of whatever email he got or if it’s because of him. But whatever.
“We just gotta pretend like we’re dating and we can’t let the therapy counselor know and also Angeal and Genesis can’t know either. And we’re got to sign up in like ten minutes now because you keep asking questions. Just trust me on this one.”
“Zack!” Cloud shouts into the PHS speaker. “What are you even saying right now?”
He imagines Angeal’s disappointed face. Genesis laughing at him. And then Angeal being hurt that he didn’t remember. “It’s really, really, important, I promise!”
“I'm going to need more of an explanation!”
“Hey, man, I’m the one about to die here.” Zack says, checking the time.
Cloud makes a frazzled sound. “What does that even mean!? Why are—” He sighs loudly. “Okay, fine whatever! I’ll do couples therapy with you!”
“You’re the best, Cloudy! I’m going to go get us signed up!”
“Can you explain now?”
And Zack ends the call. He’ll make sure to explain everything in detail after dinner so they’re on the same page. And he’ll call Aerith to let her know too. But he needs to go back to the twenty-eighth floor pronto.
As soon as he grabs his sword, Sephiroth states, “This is going to end poorly.”
“Not if you don’t say anything to Angeal!” And then it occurs to Zack that this whole thing hinges on Sephiroth not saying anything.
He spins around to fully face him and presses his hands together in a pleading motion. “Please, please, please don’t say anything to Angeal? Or Genesis?”
It’s a lot to ask. Considering that the three of them are dating and all. But he and Sephiroth are still friends so maybe that holds some sway.
Sephiroth observes him for a long moment then sighs. “You’re lucky you did not have that call in front of Genesis. The power he would hold, you would regret it.”
“Thank you! You’re the best, man!” And Zack is running out of the office and to the SCS program office.
Zack is outside of Angeal’s apartment door at exactly the correct time, not late at all for once. He knocks a whole bunch just to let Angeal know he’s here and then lets himself inside. It smells like spices inside, ones he’s learned are typically used in Banora cooking that’s a cool combo of savory and sweet.
The entrance area is like a mini-gardening center. There’s tons of potted plants everywhere, even some hanging from rope hangers from the ceiling. Seriously, his water bill has got to be astronomical. Or Shinra’s water bill.
“It smells really good!” He shouts into the apartment as he kicks off his uniform boots into a pile of shoes by the doorway. There’s two pairs of SOLDIER uniform boots, so Angeal and Genesis are probably both here.
Zack steps around a large potted plant that he thinks is a Banora apple tree. He’s not good with identifying plants no matter how hard Angeal has tried to teach him.
When Angeal steps out from the kitchen, he’s traded out his uniform for normal clothes. Angeal immediately fixes a look at Zack. “I really hope you have confirmation of signing up for SCS, Zackary Fair.”
He’s holding out his hand, waiting for whatever confirmation Zack has.
And Genesis, the jerk, snickers from the living room where he’s casually lounging on the large couch like it’s a throne instead of the cheap Shinra issued furniture that it is. He looks at this like it’s a play for his personal amusement or something.
Zack points at him. “Ha! Jokes on you!” And he slaps his PHS into Angeal’s outstretched hand with the screen on.
He enjoys the surprised look on both Angeal and Genesis’s faces. So he stands proudly at his accomplishment. Sure, Katie had been confused when he rushed into the SCS office to sign up before they closed. But it’s all legit and confirmed. He triple checked.
Angeal looks down at the PHS, then back up to Zack, then back down. He opens his mouth to say something, but ends up not saying anything. Zack continues to look on proudly.
Take that! No disappointed looks today!
“Zack.” Angeal finally says, his tone a little odd.
“Yeah?” He sends a smug look Genesis’s way. Nothing’s bursting into flames here!
“This says couples therapy.”
Genesis’s head whips around, suddenly looking highly interested in possible drama.
Zack nods. “Yup!”
Angeal looks back down at the PHS screen with the Shinra online portal for SCS appointments. “With the other party being Cloud Strife .”
Genesis chokes on whatever he was snacking on and then actually scrambles over the couch and snatches the PHS out of Angeal’s hands. “Lies and fabrications!”
“Yeah, it does,” Zack says, simply. Because it does. They have an appointment next week. He already got the confirmation email to his Shinra issued email account. And Cloud probably got the same email too.
Angeal struggles to think of something to say for a moment. “And since when were you dating Cloud? I thought you were dating Aerith. Did something happen between you and Aerith?”
Genesis repeatedly smacks the PHS, scowling at it. “This has to be a glitch. Why is it glitching?”
“Yeah! I'm still dating Aerith!”
Angeal’s face is still weirdly blank. And Zack crosses his arms now. “Hey, you’re dating two people too. You can’t judge me.”
“I’m not judging you, I’m confused.” Angeal furrows his brows while Genesis continues to hit the PHS. “And you’re apparently having relationship issues with Cloud? Enough to go to therapy over it?”
“That doesn’t even make sense.” Genesis says, making a face. “Why do you need couples therapy? It’s not like you’re married or going through a divorce. What would you even have a divorce over anyway? Your assets include Chocobo Racers, postcards of Gongaga , and whatever measly salary Shinra pays the infantry.”
“Hey! I’ve got lots of assets!” Zack says, grabbing his PHS back. “And we aren’t getting a divorce! Obviously!”
Angeal looks slightly suspicious now. “And why didn’t you say anything about this sooner?”
Oh no. What if Angeal realizes this whole thing was an elaborate lie or—
The door to Angeal’s apartment opens and Sephiroth walks in. He takes in the state of everything and calmly ducks out of the way of the plant hanging from the ceiling that’s directly eye level with him. And he asks, “I take it you have informed them of the couples therapy, then?”
Genesis spins around, sounding distressed. “It can’t be true! Sephiroth, tell me you jest!”
Sephiroth walks into the kitchen, expression calm. “Why would I lie?”
Thank Gaia for Sephiroth.
He owes Sephiroth big, big time.
Genesis dramatically falls against the counter, looking legitimately baffled and confused. Angeal’s brows furrow further and he looks just as confused. Wow, they are really confused about this. Sure, it might be surprising, but they’re really lost looking.
Probably because he didn’t say anything about his ‘relationship’ with Cloud and Zack talks nonstop about Aerith. So it would be weird.
“Cloudy didn’t want me to say anything yet. He’s shy!” Zack says, waving his PHS around. Because it’s true. Cloud is shy and usually nervous around most people. That’s totally believable. Even if they’ve only briefly met Cloud, it would be believable that he would be too shy to say anything about any relationship.
Angeal looks at him for a moment longer than shakes his head. “Then you need to bring him here more often.”
“Yeah, I will!” So, at least Angeal believes him. He looks around the corner into the kitchen. “Whatcha making?”
While Sephiroth calmly goes to sit in the living room, Genesis is watching Zack with clear distrust like he is deciding whether or not to believe it. Zack glances at him. “What, man?”
“If I recall correctly, less than two hours ago you were panicking,” Genesis says, crossing his arms and leaning against the kitchen counter to stare Zack down. Even though he’s not wearing his usual red coat, his casual shirt is still the same color of red. “So, forgive me for not trusting you.”
“Hey, man,” Zack says, offended by Genesis’s completely accurate assessment of the situation. “The lack of trust is hurtful, you know.”
Genesis points at Zack’s PHS, still in his hand. “Invite him here, right now. I need confirmation this is not some sort of elaborate prank.”
“Come on, man.” Zack says, slouching a little. Cloud is totally unprepared to face all three of them at once. He didn’t think this would happen. “Why would this be a prank?”
He might be lying, but it’s not a prank.
He must hesitate for too long because one moment the PHS is still in his hand and the next Genesis is holding it and hitting call. He holds it back out to Zack with an expectant look.
Cloud picks up almost instantly.
And Zack starts talking before he has a chance to say anything. “Hey! Cloudy! So, you know how you said please don’t tell the First Class guys that we’re dating and all?” He laughs nervously as all three of them watch him.
Please, please play along. He’ll explain everything as soon as possible.
Cloud is silent for a moment and then hesitantly asks, “What did you do?” He sounds almost scared to hear the answer.
“Please don’t be mad!” Zack says, side eyeing Genesis while he laughs at Zack. “But I kinda told them and now you have to come to dinner? Haha. You’re free right?”
“Zack.”
He laughs again. “Anyways, you’re free right now? Cause your patrol got canceled and all?”
“ Zack .” Cloud increasingly sounds baffled. He whisper-yells the second part. “I have so many questions.”
Zack laughs again while Genesis keeps watching him like he’s trying to find any evidence that Zack is lying (which he is). “I know, man. I know. I’ll come let you on the SOLDIER floor.”
“I—” Cloud cut himself off, stumbling over his words. “You—”
“Sorry! Sorry!” He says as he hurries over to the doorway to shove his feet into his uniform boots. He avoids the many plants in the doorway. He can feel the weight of Genesis’s suspicious gaze on him still.
“You can borrow Chocobo Racers all you want! Pick hang out food for like a month! I promise!”
Silence for a moment. Then there’s a sigh, like Cloud has accepted his fate and given up. “Three months.”
Zack winces. “You strike a hard bargain here, Strife. But yeah, fair.” He ties his boots with one hand. “Okay, I’m heading down. See you soon!”
He’s going to have to majorly apologize for all of this. He owes Cloud big time for this one.
While he’s finishing up putting his boots back on, Angeal suddenly comments. “Well, I guess it does make sense.”
Zack stops and looks over at him by the kitchen. “Huh? What does?”
“We had bets going,” Genesis says, sounding very put-out. “If there was anything going on with you and your infantry boy.”
Zack physically cannot stop himself from his jaw dropping. “Huh?”
No way. That doesn’t make any sense. Why would they even have bets for that?
Him and Cloud? Wait, his infantry boy?
Angeal walks back into the kitchen. “Of course, we didn’t think you were actually dating the whole time. But it would explain some things.”
Wait, what?
Zack stands up all the way, blinking rapidly. “Wait, what are you talking about? Explain what?”
Genesis looks towards Sephiroth, half frowning and scowling. “In that case, who wins the bet?”
Sephiroth shrugs. And then, Genesis looks back and sends a look to Zack. “Weren’t you retrieving your apparent boyfriend?”
“Oh yeah!” And Zack rushes out the door.
What was there to even have bets about? Explain some things? What does that even mean? Whatever. Genesis never makes sense anyway. Maybe it’s something to do with Loveless.
He jogs all the way down to the entrance of the SOLDIER floors and sees Cloud waiting there, looking very frazzled and disoriented.
He’s glancing around nervously and looking down at his PHS every couple seconds. He’s not in uniform anymore, but it sort of looks like he changed in a couple seconds. Which would make sense if he ran over here from his bunk.
“Heya, Cloud!” He waves wildly above his head.
Cloud looks up from his PHS and practically marches up to him. “You’ve got exactly ten seconds to explain—”
“I know, I know!” He holds up his hands as a show of peace. “But I promise it’s for a good cause?”
Cloud shakes Zack's arm, looking mildly panicked. “What? Me dying?”
“Hey, man.” Zack says, patting Cloud’s hand that’s shaking his arm. “You’re not gonna die or anything.”
He swipes his ID card and they walk into the SOLDIER floors.
Cloud desperately tries to make his shirt look less wrinkled. It doesn’t really help. Did he pick it up off the floor or something? “How did this even happen?”
“Uh, so you know how I was telling you that Angeal got this program for therapy and counseling set up for SOLDIERS and Shinra military?”
Cloud nods, still trying to make his clothes look like they were clean. “Yeah?”
“So when it got approved, he told me to sign up for it which was—”
“Ten months ago.” Cloud says with growing understanding, a hint of horror entering his voice. “Zack, you didn’t forget, did you?”
He laughs, rubbing the back of his head. “Ah, yea, I did.”
Cloud face palms. Zack has to chuckle a little. “So about two hours ago Angeal told me that today’s the last day to get signed up for it and said if I didn’t have confirmation that I had an appointment, he’d be disappointed in me. But like the Disappointed Angeal Face ™ levels of disappointment.”
Cloud gives him a flat look. “And you panicked.”
“Yeah, I panicked,” Zack says, hitting the up button for the elevator. “So I told him I had signed up months ago.”
“Seriously? How deep of a hole were you gonna dig for yourself?”
“Hey, man. You’ve never had to face Angeal’s disappointed looks before. Nothing makes you reconsider all of your life choices like that. And so I went to the SCS office and they said there were no individual or group sessions open for a long, long time. Except for couples therapy.”
The elevator doors pop open. And they both step inside and he hits the button for his floor.
“And the SCS lady said only Shinra employees can use it and—”
“Aerith isn’t part of Shinra,” Cloud finishes for him.
“Exactly. And so I ranted to Sephiroth and then I saw your text and it was like my one chance to not deeply disappoint Angeal.” Zack reaches around Cloud to stuff the tag back down in the back of his shirt.
“So, I called you and then when I got to dinner I showed the confirmation email to Angeal. And then Genesis was being all weird about it and said you had to come to dinner.”
“Zack,” Cloud says, with feeling while he reties his shoes properly. “I am going to die. I have to lie to my commanding officers and are we seriously going to go to a therapy session and lie? Isn’t that wasting the SCS’s resources?”
Zack rubs the back of his head. “Uh, yeah I guess so. Sorry, I know it was really sudden and all.”
The elevator door dings open and they step out onto the floor where Angeal’s apartment is located.
“And what are we even pretending to go to counseling for?” Cloud says, anxiously. His eyes look up and down the hallway, but there’s no one else here right now. “How long are we going to pretend to do this? I’m not good under pressure like this. You know that.”
He didn’t think that far ahead. But it’s fine. This whole plan has been improvised. He shrugs. “We can think of something, I’m sure.”
He waits for a second while Cloud attempts to make his hair look like he wasn’t wearing a helmet all day. Even though it always looks like that.
Zack adds, “We have to go cause Angeal will keep an eye on it, probably for like ten months till I can sign up for individual or group.”
Cloud whips around to look up at him. “ Ten months ?!”
Zack winces. “I know, I know. But it’ll be fine, Cloudy. Just think of it as a fun adventure with your best friend!”
Cloud runs a hand over his face and he sounds miserable. “I demand so much more than three months of hang out food choice. I’m a terrible actor. We don’t even have a cover story or anything. I can’t believe I’m going to have to lie to them.”
Zack glances up the hallway and sees the door to Angeal’s apartment. “Well, we got like thirty seconds to think of that cover story.”
Thirty seconds is really not long enough. But luckily he’s good at thinking on his feet!
So they have a sort of decent cover story.
Zack knocks rapidly on the door like he always does to let them know he’s about to head inside. Cloud gives him one more anxious, miserable look and Zack pats his back in sympathy and appreciation of his bro doing all this for him. He unlocks the door.
“We’re here!” He announces stepping inside and around the plants. “Oh, yeah, Angeal’s got a lot of plants. Don’t hit your head.”
Genesis stands right beside the entrance, arms crossed and assessing them. Zack kicks off his shoes and tries to be as normal as possible. “Dude, you look like a guard dog. You’ve literally met Cloud before. Chill out.”
He can practically feel the anxiety radiating from Cloud, so he tries to be extra normal.
“Do not ‘dude’ me, Fair.” Genesis says, huffing. And he turns to look at Cloud. “Is this some kind of elaborate prank that one has concocted to play us for fools?”
Cloud looks very, very convincingly confused. Which might be because Zack didn’t tell him that Genesis thinks this is all a joke. Cloud glances once at Zack then back to Genesis, very confused. “Uh, no?”
Genesis leans forward to Cloud, side-eying Zack as he does it. And stage whispers. “If you’re being coerced into doing this, you can tell us. The fact the puppy managed to date one person is astounding as it is.”
“Hey!” Zack says, pretending like he’s going to throw his uniform boot at Genesis. “How is that astounding? You’re dating two people!”
Genesis looks him up and down, not bothering to hide his judgement. “Yes, but I have a much better sense of style and flair than you do, Fair. Forgive me for being surprised by your secret relationship with the person you described as your ‘bestest bro’ for the past two years.”
Zack walks into the apartment and passes Genesis. He waves to Sephiroth, who waves back after a belated second. “You can date your bestest bro, totally normal! You and Angeal are bestest bros, right?”
“I will not reduce my relationship with Angeal to ‘bestest bros,’ Genesis says, full of judgement as he makes quotation marks in the air. “Infinite in mystery is the gift of the Goddess.”
That doesn’t even make sense at all.
“Great, now he’s quoting Loveless,” Zack mutters and glances back at Cloud, who’s still standing in the entrance way, petrified. “Cloudy, you can come into the living room, it’s all cool man. Also, Genesis, bro, you’ve got to chill out.”
“About what?” Genesis says, arms crossed again. “I’ve done nothing wrong.”
“You look like you’re interrogating them,” Angeal says, walking out of the kitchen and wiping his hands on a red kitchen towel. He looks at Cloud, smiling. “Make yourself at home.”
“Angeal’s the only one here with manners, other than Sephiroth. So, really, it’s just Genesis without manners.” Zack says, going back into the entrance way to grab Cloud’s hand and bring him into the living room.
He keeps talking before Genesis can say anything about him not having manners. “So, whatcha making, Angeal? Smells really good.”
Yeah, this is going great. Cloud only looks half-way to jumping out of his own skin. So, going great!
Genesis: AGAIN I ASK HOW, WHEN, AND WHERE DID THEY START DATING? I FEEL LIED TO! DUPED! MANIPULATED! BETRAYED!
Angeal: Have you been thinking about this since last night? Aren’t you supposed to be working right now?
Angeal: Also, you’re only saying that because you’ve been betting on how long it would take them to start dating or for Zack to realize polyamory is a possibility.
Genesis: Of course I do!! There’s only so much entertainment one gets around Shinra that isn’t ethically concerning and watching your puppy have a crush that he was entirely unaware of was immensely entertaining.
Genesis: And don’t pretend like you aren’t also dying to know. I know you are.
Genesis: And Sephiroth, you had better answer my earlier question.
Angeal: Don’t ignore me.
Sephiroth: Zack only told me before dinner. I know as much as you.
Genesis: LIES.
Genesis: I want answers.
Sephiroth: You got answers at dinner.
Angeal: I’m surprised Zack didn’t say something sooner. Even on accident. His ability to withhold information is…lacking to say the least.
Genesis: You mean non-existent.
Angeal: I understand his reasoning for not saying sooner out of respect for his partner’s privacy but still.
Genesis: I mean his chocobo looked ready to jump out of his skin at dinner.
Angeal: If they are dating, you could at least try to call him by his actual name.
Genesis: No. Chocobo and variations of puppy.
Angeal: An attempt.
Angeal: I still think Zack should have signed up for individuals not couples. But I’m glad he remembered at least. I was starting to think I needed to stage an intervention on remembering and how to remember important adult things.
Genesis: It can’t be that bad. He’s SOLDIER.
Angeal: He didn't know he needed to sign all of the paperwork after his promotion to get the pay raise. He went five months without the pay raise.
Genesis: I take it back. How does your puppy survive without intervention?
Angeal: Gaia only knows. This is why I’m surprised he actually remembered to sign up for it. Not that I’m not glad to hear it.
Genesis: I still think a certain silver haired man knows more.
Sephiroth: I know nothing. If you’re implying that somehow Zackary Fair managed to hack the system, I think you are overestimating his abilities and cunning. But I can confirm, he did indeed sign up for couples therapy with Cloud Strife through the proper methods.
Genesis: I feel close to ripping my hair out!! How did we not realize they were dating??? I feel like the Goddess herself is making a mockery of us. I need to know who won the bet. I refuse to let Sephiroth win 5,000 gil simply because Angeal’s wayward puppy managed to keep his relationship secret from us for Gaia knows how long.
Angeal: Please tell me that the betting pool is not actually up to 5,000 gil.
Genesis: …I will remain silent on the issue.
Sephiroth: It is. Genesis added another 1,500 gil to it after the time Zack showed us his PHS folder of photos of Cloud.
Angeal: I already told you that anything over 3,000 gil was too much.
Genesis: THE FOLDER WAS LABELED AS ‘CUTE PHOTOS OF CLOUDY’ WHAT ELSE WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO.
Sephiroth: I admit, even for me that was convincing evidence. After that I also added more to the betting pool.
Angeal: I want you both to know I am sighing in my office right now.
Genesis: And 3rd class Kunsel also added 500 gil to the pot as well. So don’t pin this all on us.
Angeal: I thought this was only between the three of us?
Genesis: Oh no, not anymore darling. SOLDIER, Turks, and admins all were in on it after the time your puppy accidentally hit reply all on an email he meant to send to his chocobo. You know the one.
Angeal: I know. I was the one who required him to retake the email security course. I still don’t know why he was emailing Cloud a playlist of songs that reminded him of Cloud instead of texting it.
Genesis: Nobody has ever said the puppy is more intelligent than a puppy.
Angeal: Genesis.
Genesis: He emailed a playlist. Through his work email. Not to mention how he is entirely unaware of his feelings.
Genesis: Or perhaps we should look at the time he recorded a five minute long voice message talking about his day? And when you asked about it, he just said he had too much to say and he didn’t feel like texting it all and we all assumed it was for his girlfriend but then he said it was for his ‘favorite fluffy chocobo in the whole world.’
Genesis: Or another favorite of mine; the time the puppy tried to bake (after making a mess of your kitchen) a Gongagaian classic dessert for a romantic holiday, he gave some of it to not just his girlfriend but also a certain CLOUD STRIFE. AND HE SOMEHOW SAW NO ISSUE WITH IT.
Sephiroth: I thought the time he brought back an entire bag of beach rocks for Cloud Strife was very telling.
Genesis: Yes, thank you Sephiroth. The rocks were very telling.
Sephiroth: I thought so.
Genesis: Nobody was talking about the rocks, dear.
Sephiroth: I thought it was meaningful.
Genesis: They were normal rocks. Just an entire bag of rocks.
Sephiroth: I would be endeared if someone handed me rocks from an overseas mission because it reminded them of me. It was thoughtful.
Genesis:...are you telling me you want rocks for our next anniversary?
Sephiroth: It was an observation.
Genesis: Your understanding of human relationships is still abysmal.
Genesis: Angeal, I think you were focusing on getting the wrong person signed up for therapy.
Sephiroth: I was not permitted to sign up. Hojo used his clearance to override the request.
Genesis: I’m sorry, what?
Angeal: When did this happen?
Sephiroth: Today. It was the last day of registration. I received the email a little bit ago.
Genesis: And did the living waste of a human existence say why he did this?
Sephiroth: According to the email I received from the counseling administration, “1st Class SOLDIER Sephiroth cannot receive mental or psychological counseling, therapy, or analysis by any other department or individual within Shinra or otherwise besides Professor Hojo.”
Sephiroth: I expect a follow-up email from Professor Hojo shortly.
Genesis: No doubt to berate you for even signing up and making the admins of counseling services think the great general Sephiroth has any issues. I think that the science department seems very flammable don't you think?
Angeal: Genesis, no.
Angeal: Sephiroth, we’ll figure something out. The program is to help all SOLDIERS and military personnel, including the 1st class. I was hoping since the president approved the program Hojo would have no authority over it.
Sephiroth: His authority seems to override most things concerning me. If not all.
Genesis: Again, I say. Very, very flammable.
Angeal: Genesis, no. Go to the training room if you feel the need to catch something on fire.
Angeal: Sephiroth, we will figure something out.
Genesis: I want to catch something on fire for real, thank you very much.
Angeal: You can catch one page of the Shinra Weekly magazine on fire. In the sink, as long as you don’t set the smoke detectors off. One page.
Genesis: Hardly a satisfying fire. But I will make the compromise.
Genesis sent a picture in the chat.
Angeal: I said one page!!! Not the whole thing!!
Genesis: Oops.
Genesis: I thought I saw a cockroach.
Genesis: The cockroach is Hojo in this scenario.
Sephiroth: Cockroaches can survive extremely high temperatures. You may need to increase the temperature to terminate it.
Genesis: You are so right, Seph.
Angeal: Do NOT burn down my bathroom, Genesis.
Genesis: I burned the second one. I feel slightly better now.
Genesis: But now I’m restless. I think I will go pester your puppy until he actually tells me about how he and his chocobo started dating.
Angeal: Oh Gaia. All I request is no fires, no upset Zacks or infantrymen.
Genesis: I shall make no promises. I can only control my own actions, not the reactions of others.
Angeal: That is not what that tidbit of therapy means and you know it.