Chapter Text
Prologue -
Many centuries ago when the world was more organic, when there were more trees then roads and the sky had not been tainted by pollution. In what is now Mexico but was once called Anahuac lived a brave warrior named Popocatepetl. He was one of the bravest men across turtle island , many swooned for the handsome warrior but Popocatepetl had eyes for only one. Iztaccihuatl, she was the embodiment of the word beauty. The daughter of the Aztec chief had stolen Popocatepetl's heart and he had stolen hers too. Some may say their love was greater than that of the sun and moon. The two lovers long to be married so Popocatepetl asked the chief for his daughter's hand in marriage.
The chief admired the strength and courage of the warrior, but still didn't believe he was good enough for his daughter. He was however willing to take a chance on him. He told popocatepetl that if he fought in the upcoming battle and was victorious he would be welcomed back in a great celebration and may marry his daughter. Popocatepetl accepted, greatly determined to bring back victory and his heart for Iztaccihuatl. Unfortunately this tale does not end on a happy ending, One day a rival of Popocatepetl who was jealous of the couple told Princess Iztaccihuatl that Popocatepetl had died in combat. Crushed and overwhelmed by sadness, the princess decided to end her life and died not knowing that it was a lie. After a long lengthy battle Popocatepetl arrived back ready to marry his lover. But upon arrival rather than being met with celebration he was met with sad news. The chief shared that while he was gone Iztaccihuati had sadly passed away. Unable to cope with the loss of his love, Popocatepetl wandered the streets of the village with feelings of guilt not being able to say goodbye to his beautiful princess.
Until one day he came up with an idea to honor his love and to assure she would never be forgotten. He set out to find the perfect place to bury Iztaccihuatl, he traveled long and far until reaching the summit where he laid her down on a great mountain. He knelt down to the body of what was once a beautiful princess. Now a lifeless corpse and watched over her, never leaving her side. Eventually he himself died of sorrow. Touched by their love the gods covered them in snow and transformed them to two beautiful volcanos to forever remain side by side.
Many Many years later-
On a hot summer day, In the quiet suburbs of (your city/town) there was a quiet house Owned by a newly college graduate and single woman named (your name). They've only lived in the house for 4 years but have never felt more at home. On this particular day Y/n was trying to calm her nerves and prepare herself for tomorrow. Tomorrow will be her first day at her new job. But it wasn't just a job. No, she'll be the new customer sales representative for the top megacorporations in all of the world known as Valdivian. All thanks to the help of her best friend Sam who got her the job. Y/n was a hard worker and many former employers can vouch how great of a team member she was. But no matter how many times she starts over, the first day of a new job is always nerve wracking especially for such a big and important company.
As she was pacing back and forth in the living room doing breathing exercises, she couldn't ignore the blasting summer heat in the house. She could feel herself being baked alive. Y/n walks to the stair case and heads towards the thermostat turning on the AC. Making her way back to the living room she looks up at the grate on the wall just above the tv. Seconds later she can feel that refreshing breeze hit, closing her eyes to really take it all in. The cold breeze soon caused the shape of her nerves to transform a feeling of uneasiness to that of relaxation.
“ Everything is going to be okay.” Taking one last deep breath as she tells herself that there is nothing to fear. Y/n walks away and heads upstairs to the bathroom and prepares a bath for herself.
But what she doesn’t see-what she can’t see-is a mysterious figure just on the other side of the vent watching her as she walks away. To the naked eye it appears as any other ordinary air vent. However if you somehow acquired special lenses that are a secret government weapon; you could get a glimpse of something entirely else or more specifically someone else. He remains hidden behind the air vent grate watching you in awe.
“ Another successful day of keeping you cool, my beauty.” Knowing he helped bring y/n a tiny moment of peace fills him with satisfaction.
Ever since you moved into the house he was drawn to you almost instantly. He can’t quite put his finger on why. He’s asked himself this question more times than he can count. All he can really say is he feels drawn to you;From the sound of your laugh to the sight of you curling up in the evening light. To the gentle trail of your footsteps on hardwood floors. He was under your spell. From that day on it was his duty to always make sure you’re always warm or cool and experience only the utmost pleasurable service from him. He thinks of himself as your humble servant and you as a beautiful princess that has control over him. Some may find this concerning but to him he would serve you for the rest of your life, it’s practically his purpose. He meets you upstairs in your bedroom ready to end the day.
As you dry your hair, you take one look at yourself in the mirror and smile at your reflection trying to boost your confidence for tomorrow.
" You got this Y/n, YOU are great, YOU are smart, and most importantly YOU are the greatest god damn customer service representative, Sam wouldn't have recommended you for this job if you didn't have what it takes!" You look at yourself and point at the mirror really trying to emphasize your confidence.
Though you struggle to fully believe it, it still makes you feel good about yourself. You made your way to your bed pulling the blanket over your body feeling the warmth of the polyester fabric. Your head hits the soft pillows and begin to feel your eyes get heavier and heavier until all you see is darkness.
Your air vent observes from the wall in front of the bed as you are in a world of slumber. Smiling to himself he can’t help but imagine what it would feel like to cuddle you. How the warmth of your body would feel against his as you drape your arms around him and how he would never let you go. But atlas this is merely a dream, a fantasy for him. You were a human and he was a HVAC system. Even if by some magic miracle you can talk to him, it’s not like you would return the feelings especially if you saw what he actually looks like. In the end all he has are his nightly dreams and that will have to do.
The next morning ~
You wake up early and prepare yourself a cup of ( tea or coffee of your choice) and head to your office. You turn on your computer and wait for it to load. As you wait you take a peek at your bulletin board on the wall. You look at the couple of sticky notes stuck on there. There're only three notes that contain simple but difficult aims : to find love, make friends, and possibly make enemies.
You put them up after graduation wanting to manifest new relationships in your fresh adult life. You had friends back in high school but lost touch after college. You did try to befriend people but you were really focused on your studies during those four years so you never really had time to go out. You didn’t have enemies-except for one bully from high school, but they're in jail now. Who would have seen that coming? Still, an enemy could bring some drama into your life. As for love, you're not opposed to the idea of love but you never had the best of luck.
The sound of your computer interrupts your thoughts.You quickly notice your computer has finished loading and go to one of the saved browsers on your screen. You land on the messaging board between you and the chief executive officer David Most. He welcomes you to the team and praises your application for having the least amount of spelling mistakes.
After that you received a message from Tom your manager or 'leadership principle guidance associate'. His approach to you is very casual or at least he is trying to be. He starts by giving you the run down on your position and what to expect. Not long after chatting with him you get a message from your best friend Sam. She gives you advice for the job and wishes you the best of luck. You switch to another browser that contains a list of customers and their problems. You start with an older woman needing a refund for an old sewing machine, next you help transfer someone to your manager, than you refund someone who somehow popped their couch in their kitchen and a gentleman who noticed his order was short a couple paper clips he even counted every single paper clip to make sure he received the amount promised to him, lastly you help out a science teacher and even learned a lot about cobalt.
After you finish with your customers you see a message notification from David. You click on his message to see an announcement that the company will be pursuing more artificial help and that your position and many others will be cut. You were shocked to say the least you had just started and not even an hour in your already Fired. Well, not technically fired yet. The way Tom worded it was since they couldn't fire you without cause that puts you in labor limbo. You sigh in defeat feeling utterly hopeless.
Your friend Sam hears the sudden news and offers her support to you. She then tells you to move to thiscord and continue talking there. When you logged in you received a message from a user by the name tinfoilhat. At first you think it's Sam but you get this weird feeling in your gut telling you something is off.
You hesitantly replied to his message. He's an anonymous hacker who for some reason chose you of all people to send a very secretive and special package. You couldn't tell if this was a prank or if he is being serious. Within seconds you hear glass break and head to the front door there on the floor you see a package resembling a present. You can’t help but think why me? You open up the present and find a pair of glasses.
" This is what was so secretive?" You pick up the glasses and examine them. What could possibly be so special about these sunglasses? You swear you might have seen them on Shein. With nothing really else to lose you put them on, you honestly look pretty good in them.
You were about to take them off when suddenly a young looking woman appeared out of nowhere. Her hair is pink with yellow highlights that reach past her shoulders to her waist, she is wearing a cropped white blazer over a hot pink bralette and a skirt made white, pink, and yellow hearts, most noticeably she appears to wear the same glasses you have on.
" Hey there !" She greets you. You were a little freaked out and couldn't say anything but manage to give a small and confused wave.
" Your life is about to change! Hope you're ready?" She is surprisingly very chipper for someone who just showed up in your house.
" Woah woah woah, hold on who are you? And how did you get into my house?" You step back a little frightened by this stranger. You look over your shoulder hoping to find a nearby weapon in case she tries something funny. She giggles, finding your confusion adorable. She approaches you more carefully and slowly not wanting to scare you more.
" Don't be scared I'm here to help you out!" She smiles and it does help you feel at ease.
" I'm a pair of dateviator glasses- my name is Skylar Specs." She reaches her hand out for you to shake. You shake her hand and relax your body but not fully letting your guard down. You were really confused about this, was she the glasses herself how is that possible?
" My lenses have special properties: they allow you to 'Directly Acknowledge a Thing's Existence' or DATE!" She gets a little excited when she mentions that word. You're slowly starting to understand. She tells you how the dateviators work. In short, when you wear them you can see the 'soul' of an object and talk to them like a person. You didn't realize objects could have souls, makes you think of all the possible furnishings and appliances you've destroyed in the past...
" I have a feeling, just a silly old little feeling, just a grimpy gromby feeling in my lil tum-tum. That it'll help make your life a little no a LOT bit more richer! And maybe find some love! Love that is allll around you." She sings the last part. Was she implying you to try and date your household objects? You couldn’t even flirt with actual people. Your relationships never even lasted more than a couple months and your last ex was a piece of shit. Still you're not entirely opposed to the idea but if you can't even date a fork in the garbage disposal then you're the problem. Any way she has you test the dateviators out on your front door. When you activate them you're startled a bit by the magic beams that shoot out. You see a tall man with a really good physique and dark brunette hair wearing a soldier uniform in a pose that resembles a bouncer. Admittedly you did find him hot.
" No funny business. I don't want to see those spectacles being used for something untoward." You never thought you would ever hear your door speak to you or be British.
" Hey Dorian! Trust me, This is going to go super well!" Skylar reassured Dorian that no harm will be done with this new power of yours. You start to learn the rules of these spectacles. You can only talk to an object once per day, you learn about specs points, and the different relationships routes you can take. Skylar introduces you to a couple more dateables as she calls them. You meet Phonecia your phone, Maggie the magnifying glass, and Betty your bed. After a long weird day you call it a night and head into bed. You couldn't sleep so fast as you had a ton on your mind. You thought of Dorian's friendship speech and it wouldn't be so bad to just befriend everyone but then you think of the possibility of dating and that doesn't sound bad either. You feel yourself getting tired and drift off to sleep ready to continue this new journey tomorrow.
As you are sleeping all of your furniture and appliances meet up in your living room. There's an older looking woman with white hair and is wearing an outfit that has the same texture as your ceiling. When her presence was known the whole room was silent waiting for her to make an announcement. She stands tall and proud as if she was the mayor of the house.
" Good evening everyone, I know we are all excited about the humans' new discovery of talking to us. I'd first like to introduce Miss Skylar Specs." She gestures to Skylar to come up with her. Skylar smiles and waves at the crowd.
" Thank you mayor Celia, it is a pleasure meeting all of you! I know you all might have some questions so please raise your hand and I will answer them the best I can!" One by one Skylar picks a hand and calls on them and answers their question. However one person is hiding in the walls away from the crowd listening closely.
" Can it really be true? Can the human now speak to everyone?" The mysterious vent from earlier couldn't believe what he was hearing. If it's true he'll be able to talk to you and tell you how he feels. He feels excited at first but that excitement quickly turns to anxiousness. What would he say ? What would he do? How can he talk to you? What if you want to see him?
A little voice in his head taunts him:
“ Do you really think she would want to talk to you?”
“She would run for the hills if she saw your face.”
He feels his chest tighten as panic starts to creep in. He didn’t expect this to happen at all and so soon. He breathes in and out trying to calm down. He just needs to make a plan and hopefully all will be good and nothing goes wrong. He still wants to meet you badly. He hopes you don't pick him first tomorrow.