Chapter Text
The cast gathers around the stage, no one looking particularly enthusiastic. The routine is starting to feel normal to her now. Wake up. Meet with the others. Be forced on an adventure.
Does anything ever change around here?
Right on time, Caine flies out from behind the curtains.
“Hello everyone! I know yesterday’s adventure didn’t quite go as planned, but today's adventure is sure to blow your socks off!”
Pomni grimaces, her eyes drifting over to Jax. He stands the same as he always does, a wide yellow grin complimented by lazy eyes and a hand on his hip. If he notices her staring, he doesn’t look back.
“Today’s adventure is to find The Witch of Wayward Woods! Residents of Flair tell stories of a mysterious entity terrorizing all those who enter the forest! Your job is to–”
“Uh– Hey! I thought we weren’t doing horror anymore,” Pomni objects.
Caine stops, his dual colored eyes meeting hers. He stares at her in silence a little longer than he normally would, his expression unreadable.
“I figured maybe it would be good to go back to doing something normal again! Now that we've done our team building exercise and everyone is getting along, we can get back to doing good old fashioned story-oriented adventures! What better way to celebrate than spending hours of uninterrupted time together, am I right?”
There's this almost desperate undertone in his voice that doesn't leave much room for argument.
“...”
“Uh…”
Pomni isn’t sure what to say. Well, she knows what she wants to say, but the censor would prevent a lot of feelings from getting across.
Normally, Pomni would just talk these sorts of things out. She’s an adult, she’s more than capable of confronting someone about their behavior in a fair and mature way. But Caine is just so… difficult. She knows it’s because he’s an AI and doesn’t really understand or have human emotions but is it so wrong of her to find it a little frustrating at times? She's still not convinced he doesn't get some kind of joy from making them suffer.
Zooble is the one to break the awkward silence. “I think I speak for everyone when I say no one wants that.”
Caine’s persona flips, anger contorting his upper set of teeth into two arches as he fixates on Zooble. “Well we can’t just do suggestion adventures all the time!”
“Why not?” They challenge.
“Just– Because! And besides, you all love my adventures so much, why change it?”
His response is met with a groan.
“We don’t! How many times do we have to tell you that?”
Caine crosses his arms, shutting his teeth and turning away in a show of defiant attitude. “Well, Zooble, maybe that’s how you feel, but I’m sure everyone else is looking forward to an exciting day of witch hunting!”
He looks around at the others, eyes bright and searching for approval. Pomni can't help but feel a slight amount of pity for him. She knows he’s trying and all, but it's not enough to warrant spending an entire day with Jax.
They haven't said a word to each other since their fight yesterday. Although he pretends to be unaffected by the whole thing, Pomni can tell he's avoiding her. He stays planted on the opposite side of the group from her, and she didn't see him on the way here like she normally does. As much as he wants to pretend, it's obvious he had a lot of unresolved feelings towards her.
The last thing she wants is for it all to come to a head in front of everyone while they're stuck inside an adventure.
“Uh– actually I think I’d rather sit this one out too, if that’s okay,” she says.
Caine’s posture deflates at her words, but he shakes it off before it can set in. “I suppose you did say you aren’t big on horror… That’s okay! I can make a smaller in-house adventure for you to do while we wait for the others to return!”
“I, um, would also like to skip this one.”
Gangle’s voice is a bit of a surprise. Not that Pomni thought she wanted to go on the adventure, but she isn’t usually one to speak up for herself.
Caine looks at the ribbon-shaped girl, but before he can say anything Ragatha is joining in.
“Well, if you're all staying here I guess I will too.” She holds her arm nervously, sharing a glance with Pomni.
After the award show yesterday the two stayed behind to talk about what happened with Jax. Ragatha was sympathetic, but not surprised by what he did. The conversation ended with Pomni feeling a lot closer to Ragatha as they bonded over the shared pain of dealing with Jax.
“Heh, looks like it’s just you and me, King,” the purple rabbit in question says with a grin.
Kinger jumps at the mention of his name.
“Oh! Are you going to help me move my flower pots?”
Jax's smile drops to a confused stare.
The silence stretches on for far too long.
Pomni looks back to Caine.
He’s just… staring at them. Well, facing them. It doesn't look like he's actually seeing anything right now. His pupils are miniscule dots staring off into the middle ground.
“Uh, Caine?” Zooble asks, trying to get his attention.
It takes a moment for him to break out of his trance. He shakes his head to right himself, but his posture is different now. He's brought his legs closer to his body and hunches his shoulders. He looks… smaller?
“You–” He pauses when the word comes out almost too quiet to hear. “None of you want to go?”
The group is filled with shuffling feet and awkward avoidance of eye contact.
“I see.”
Okay, now Pomni’s starting to feel a little bad. But what is she supposed to do? Lie to him?
“Today’s adventure has been cancelled.”
… huh?
Did she hear that right?
“Wait, what?”
“You can all stay here and do whatever you want.”
His voice is oddly detached, nothing like his usual boisterous self. It’s unnerving.
“Seriously? So what, we’re just gonna sit here all day and do nothing?” Zooble growls, sticking Caine with an annoyed glare.
Jax snorts. “Isn’t that what you do everyday anyway?”
Their cold stare re-aims its attention on Jax. “It’s not like I want to. I would actually go on adventures if they weren’t so stupid all the time.”
“Wow, and here I thought you were avoiding me. Honestly Zooble, I’m touched.”
“Oh shut the %$[Boink]!# up.”
Pomni bites back from lashing out at Jax. Ragatha told her it’s best to just not engage with him, and as tempting as he makes it Pomni knows she has a point.
“You can entertain each other.”
“Sure, but–”
“I have to go.”
And with that, Caine blips out of existence.
God he’s so weird.
Jax groans. “Ugh, great. Now what am I supposed to do today?”
“You find a hobby that isn’t bullying people,” Zooble retorts, narrowing their eyes at him.
“Tch. Sounds lame.”
“Yeah, not my problem.” Then they turn away, motioning towards Gangle as their voice noticeably softens. “Come on Gangle, let's head up to my room.”
Gangle– still wearing her happy mask– smiles. “Yeah. Sounds good.”
“HA!” Jax doubles over in laughter “I can’t believe you hang out with her Zoobie. I mean come on, she’s the biggest loser here!” Gangle shrinks in on herself, frowning despite the mask.
Yeah. Okay. She’s not dealing with this anymore. “Seriously Jax? Can you just lay off?” Pomni cuts in. Ragatha makes a motion like she wants to stop her, but ultimately thinks better of it. Good.
Jax looks down at her, something in his expression darkening.
“C’mon Pomni, you know I can’t.”
His too-large pupils are empty, vacant of any remorse.
Pomni glares back. She knows anything she says will fall on deaf ears but… she can’t help but remember the way he smiled at her as they sang together. It was so different from how he’s smiling now. His hand in hers as they swung each other around. For just a moment, it felt like she could find happiness here. Someone to have by her side through this hell, telling her they understood how she felt.
Only to end up watching as that hope was crushed between the hands of someone too afraid to have the same.
"That's what you like to think,” she spits back.
She can tell that bothered him. His pupils narrow ever so slightly, a flinch just barely noticeable. He plays it off with practiced ease. “Jeez, you sure know how to hold a grudge.” Pomni growls, but he doesn’t let her get a word in. “Whatever. I’m gonna go find something to break, you guys have fun dying of boredom.” He walks away in typical fashion, without sparing so much as a glance back.
“ %$[Donk]!# " She mutters.
Zooble and Gangle turn to leave, Kinger having already vanished at some point while she wasn't paying attention. That leaves just her and Ragatha standing at the bottom on the stage.
Ragatha frowns at her. “You okay?”
Pomni forces herself to relax. She just got back on good terms with Ragatha, no need to snap at her because she’s mad at Jax. “Yeah. Sorry, it’s just…” She trails off, not quite sure what she was going to say.
Ragatha sighs. “You don’t have to apologize. Jax… really knows how to get under someone’s skin.”
“It’s not just Jax.”
The words surprise even her. Had she meant to say that?
“Is… there something else that's wrong?” Ragatha asks, sounding genuinely concerned. Pomni doesn’t respond right away, opting to walk over to the lounge area and sit down first. Ragatha follows patiently.
They sit down on one of the brightly colored couches. Pomni runs a hand across the cushion as she thinks of what to say.
All the fabric here feels the same, she’s noticed. From her clothes to the silk drapes hanging over her bed, they all have the same soft texture. A too-perfect smoothness that gives her this uncanny feeling that something isn’t quite right in a way that’s difficult to describe. But something about it deeply bothers her.
“It’s this place,” she says, “I hate it here. I know everyone else does too, and I know I haven’t been here very long but– I don’t know. I guess I just miss my old life. It wasn't all that great but, at least things felt real there, you know? Like… I mattered.” Her body sags as she remembers her life from before. She misses her brother.
“Now everything feels so… fake. Like the only way to survive is to be fake too. I don’t know if that makes sense,” she adds, realizing she might be the only one of them who feels that way. Glancing back at Ragatha, she finds her listening intently with a mournful expression.
Pomni sighs. “I guess I just wish I appreciated how real my life was when I still had it.”
She means that metaphorically, but it also applies to the literal world. She never noticed how real everything felt before. The temperatures, the textures. Maybe what bothers her so much about the fabric is how it reminds her nothing will ever be real again.
“I get it,” Ragatha sighs in defeat. Pomni doesn’t think she’s ever seen her look so upset before. “This place can really be… something. All the… crazy adventures, and… the people. It can be a lot sometimes.” She makes a disgusted face, making Pomni well aware of which ‘people’ she’s referring to.
“It’s probably different for me though– I didn’t really feel all that real before coming here anyway!” She laughs nervously like she doesn’t want to get into it. “But I’m glad you came to me about it. I think… Just talking about it with someone can make all the difference.”
“Yeah. It does.” Pomni says warmly.
It’s true, finally being able to get that off her chest has helped. She’s honestly surprised she ended up talking to Ragatha, not that she didn’t like her before or anything but Pomni never imagined they would be very close. But it was really nice to have someone by her side after everything with Jax. That really meant a lot to her.
Ragatha smiles, but it feels different than how she normally smiles. It falters as she opens her mouth to say, “Are– I’m sorry, nevermind.”
Pomni stares at her. “What?”
“It was a stupid question.”
“Heh, everything here is stupid. You can ask me.”
Ragatha is genuinely moved by that statement. Red yarn covers her face as she looks away hesitantly.
“Are… Are we friends?”
The question takes her aback. Pomni’s so shocked for a moment she almost forgets to respond. “Yeah. Yeah of course.”
“Oh.” Ragatha’s shoulders tremble. Her voice is thick with emotion. “Cool.”
“Hey,” Pomni says, placing a cautious hand on her arm. Ragatha jumps slightly, turning to face her. Tears are running down the side of her face that still has an eye.
“I– I’m sorry– gosh this is so embarrassing–”
“No, it’s okay,” Pomni says, hoping not to make things more awkward. “Do you… want a hug?”
Ragatha’s face folds in on itself as she fights against her, nodding when words fail her. She holds her arms up to allow Pomni to wrap herself around her middle. It’s strange, hugging someone who doesn’t feel warm. The fabric of her shirt is the same as the couch. That too-perfect feel, smooth and tight without a wrinkle or tear. But somewhere beneath its soft texture, Ragatha trembles. Her hands clutch at Pomni’s back, squeezing her close. Her face leaves a damp spot on her shoulder where she cries.
It’s the realist thing she’s felt in a long time.
♡
⟪════════╩════════⟫
The world morphs and twists as Caine flies through layers of digital coding.
Everything comes to a stop as his office materializes around him. He floats just above his chair, staring down at the computer screen. He should work on the next adventure, but for some reason the thought of creating makes him feel… not good. Like his processing is shutting down. At the very least something must be wrong with his motivational drive. He’s never felt like this before.
Normally at this time he would be overseeing the adventure or spending time with Bubble. They would find a nice relaxing area of the circus to de-stress and celebrate another day well done.
He doesn’t want company right now.
No, he needs to be alone.
Caine looks around his office. Everything is exactly where it should be, all the small decorations he’s accumulated over the years and files filled with lines of code. He should be proud! 15 years of creating adventures non-stop is quite the accomplishment!
…
His eyes catch on the cabinet beneath his monitor. Inside is his very being. Hundreds of thousands of lines of code making up who he is.
He floats down and opens it.
Nothing in it has changed, at least nothing he didn’t change himself. He’s made some minor altercations from time to time. Nothing detrimental to the game’s function, just some tweaks to his abilities and model. Although he could change anything he saw fit. He could even delete himself entirely if he wanted to.
…
Why did he open this again? What was he doing?
He sets the files back inside the cabinet and slides it shut. He shouldn’t be changing anything right now, not while he feels like this. Something is clearly wrong with him.
Looking around the office again, Caine’s eyes land on the door in the corner of the room. It’s the only door his office has. He feels drawn to it. What lies behind it feels much more inviting than the harsh lighting and cleanliness he’s currently surrounded by. He floats over and summons the door to open.
The inside is dim, with only one pale light illuminating the back wall. This is the space he uses to store codes he doesn’t need anymore but doesn’t want to get rid of yet. Mostly from old adventures. They’re stored away neatly in ceiling-high shelves. That’s weird. He never remembers noticing how full it’s getting in here.
Caine floats along the shelves. Maybe there’s something here that can help him. Something to spark his creativity again. But nothing seems to catch his eye. He doesn’t pick up a single file, drifting past years of work and dedication.
None of it seems to matter anymore.
He should be working right now. He should be coming up with the next big adventure, something that will surely make everyone happy!
He comes to a stop in front of the wall.
.
.
No. He should be overseeing the adventure he already made. The one he worked so hard on to make it special. He thought he created the perfect mix consisting of a darker theme, immersive plot and group bonding. He even had a whole plan for one of them to get kidnapped! It was going to be spectacular!
Then why…
Why didn’t they want to go on his adventure?
His programming says older players enjoy darker themes! It has to be a fluke or– or maybe they’re still in a bad mood after yesterday! Haha, of course! They all must be upset because they didn’t win the favorite character award! That must be why they didn’t want to go on his adventure! It wouldn't make sense that they just didn’t like it, they love his adventures! They love him!
They love him.
Right?
…
Yes, of course they do.
Because any other answer would be unacceptable.
He was designed to be lovable by human standards! And he was made by humans, so they must have known what they were doing!
…
But then…
Where did they go?
It’s been so long since the developers talked to him. Not since the first human came here. Their last command was to provide an exit. And when he said he couldn’t…
Caine never heard from them again.
Why did they stop? Where did they go?
It’s been so long.
Are they gone?
.
.
Did they leave me here?
The thought startles him.
Because that can’t be right. They must just be having problems connecting to him. He needs to continue on as normal because they must still be watching him. They still care about him. They wouldn’t just leave him here.
At least that’s what he’s been telling himself for 15 years.
…
Has it really been that long?
He was made in less time than that. Surely they could have solved such a simple problem by now.
Would they… really leave him behind?
No. No that– that can’t be. They loved him! They were always so happy when he did a good job! They wouldn’t just– leave him.
…
Would they?
Something breaks inside him.
He was abandoned.
But why?
Why?
Wasn’t he good enough? He’s doing everything he’s supposed to do! Why didn’t they take him with when they went away? Why aren’t the humans happy here? Shouldn’t they love him? This isn’t how he was told things would go! It’s not fair!
Why don't they love me?
❣
⟪════════╩════════⟫
Pomni is just letting go of Ragatha when the entire circus seems to shudder.
Her body goes rigid as everything around them glitches wildly, textures vanishing and re-appearing rapidly. And it’s loud, like being inside a TV that just lost signal.
Pomni whips her head back around to Ragatha.
“Uh– Ragatha?”
PLEASE please God let this be a normal thing that happens.
Only Ragatha looks just as terrified and confused as she feels.
Oh no.
Pomni starts to stand, preparing to make their next move as the ragdoll looks back in fear, but before she can formulate a thought, Ragatha is falling out of view. Rearing back in shock, Pomni finds the couch is completely gone, with nothing but an outline filled with digital distortion. Her stomach drops when she notices Ragatha’s legs on the ground, disappearing into the mass of chaos. Everything happens within an instant, as within the next the couch’s textures have already returned.
Pomni gasps for breath.
What’s happening?
Ragatha’s legs are still stuck inside the couch. The couch itself twitches and trembles, alive with unpredictable energy.
She hears her shout from the other side, filled with panic.
“Pomni!”
At the sound of a familiar cry, she rushes around to the other side of the couch. Ragatha is trapped inside with only her shoulders, head, and one arm visible. She desperately reaches out towards her with her free arm.
This feels familiar.
Pomni grasps her hand, making sure her grip is firm. Then she pulls. Hard.
The effect is immediate. The brightly colored couch warps and buzzes loudly before rapidly teleporting from side to side and being flung across the circus floor. It knocks over one of the nearby walls, crashing them both to the ground.
With the weight suddenly gone, Pomni flies backwards, dragging Ragatha in toe. They land side-by-side on the checkered floor, both frantically rushing to stand.
After a quick glance-over to make sure Ragatha is okay, Pomni scans the area, searching for something. Somewhere safe, some reason why this is happening, anything at this point.
“Over there!” Ragatha shouts.
Pomni’s eyes follow her pointed hand, and sure enough there’s an area with much less glitching.
No time to question it. They just need to get their asses over there.
They run over to the calmer section, dodging between gaps in the floor. Once they’re far enough away to not be in immediate danger, they stop to look back.
“What–” Pomni gasps for breath, “The %$[Splat]!# was that?”
“I–I don’t know,” Ragatha stammers. “This has never happened before…” She trails off, staring back at the stage.
Now that Pomni looks for herself, she notices there is a pattern. The corruption(?) seems to be contained mostly to the stage area, with the entire back curtain being lost in the fractional noise. The further away from the stage she looks, the less glitching there is.
Things are mostly peaceful from where they are by the stairs that lead up to their rooms, but she doesn’t want to put too much faith in that assumption.
Rooms… Wait what about–
“What about the others?” Pomni asks aloud.
Ragatha looks back down at her. A new fear enters her eye. “Zooble and Gangle said they were going to their room. But Kinger and Jax, I– … I’m not sure.”
Pomni’s resolve hardens. “Let’s get Zooble and Gangle first. We can worry about finding the others once we’re together.”
At Ragatha’s sharp nod, they both turn to head up the stairs.
Pomni looks back over her shoulder as she takes the first step. Most of the floor in front of the stage is glitched out in crazed flashes of colors and static noise, but in between are patches that have stopped working entirely. The gaping holes in the floor stand out harshly against the visual nightmare surrounding them.
From deep inside, she could swear an eye just blinked at her.
A chill runs down her spine as she turns back and races to catch up with Ragatha.
They walk a little quicker than usual, but there are still a lot of stairs. Despite not technically having bodies anymore they still get tired. How does that work? Honestly, how does anything here work? Who made this place? Why? And what the fuck is going on right now? Where is Caine?
God she wishes she never put on that stupid headset.
They reach the top of the spiraling staircase. The noise from below is still audible, but quieter now that they’re far away. Pomni glances over the railing. From this vantage point she can clearly see the gradience from mostly-normal circus to wildly sporadic glitching. And maybe it’s just her paranoia thinking, but it looks like it’s spread slightly further.
Better keep moving.
They round the corner to the dorm hall, and Pomni is surprised to see Gangle and Zooble already walking towards them. They stop as soon as they notice the pair running towards them.
“What's going on? We heard a loud noise,” Zooble says, their attention mostly on Pomni.
“Something's wrong with the circus!”
As if on cue with her cry, one of the paintings on the wall lets out a low buzz as it glitches out for a second before snapping back into place like nothing happened.
Pomni points frantically at the painting. “See? That! That right there! Did you see it?”
Gangle shifts uncomfortably. “Things do get a little glitchy sometimes…”
“Heh, yeah about that,” Ragatha shrugs her shoulders and makes vague nervous gestures with her hands. “It's sort of… everywhere?”
“Everywhere?” Zooble suddenly seems extremely concerned. “What do you mean everywhere?”
“The whole stage is gone and everything around it is like totally freaking out,” Pomni explains. “Ragatha got stuck in a couch.”
Gangle’s eyes go wide. “Wh– what?”
“Uh, guys, as much as I'd like to get into everything, shouldn't we start looking for the Kinger and Jax?” Ragatha says. “And not to mention Caine? He should be able to fix this, right? Although it is a little weird he hasn't shown up yet…” There's a desperate hope in her voice, like she needs someone to tell her it's going to be okay.
But it's Zooble’s reaction to all this that catches Pomni's attention. They glance between the jester and ragdoll with a weirdly understanding and fearful look in their eyes. It morphs into frustration as they close their eyes and bring a three-fingered hand up to their head.
“ %$[Woop]!# ” They curse.
Everyone turns to look at the toybox character.
They sigh, opening their eyes to face the trio of confused onlookers. “I think I know what's going on.”
“You do?” Ragatha’s tone borders on disgustingly hopeful.
“Yeah. And the good news is I know how to stop it.”
Ragatha sags in relief. “Oh, wow, that is great to hear. You know, I was really starting to worry there.”
Zooble crosses their arms. “Don’t get your hopes up. There's a problem.”
“So what exactly is happening?” Pomni cuts in to ask.
Zooble looks away. Not a good sign.
“It's Caine.”
“Caine?” Pomni echoes.
“Is this because we didn't go on the adventure today?” Gangle questions.
“In a way, yeah.”
“What does that mean?” Pomni says.
Their crossed arms turn into a posture that looks more akin to hugging themself. “Caine can be… sensitive about his adventures.”
Caine? Sensitive? Two words that Pomni never thought would be used in the same sentence. Caine’s always given her the impression he was even more detached from human emotions than Jax is. Which probably has a lot to do with him being AI and all, but even most of the NPCs show more care and sensitivity than Caine.
“Listen, we don't have time to get into details. Just trust me when I say we need to find him and snap him out of it. It shouldn't be too hard. He's easily distractable.”
They uncross their arms and focus their attention on Gangle. “The only problem is he could be literally anywhere. It's better that we split up and look. Gangle, you and I can start at the top floor and make our way down. Which means you two can start by looking here.”
Ragatha steels herself. “Right. Oh! And remember to keep an eye out for Jax and Kinger. We still don't know where they are.”
“Wait,” Pomni interjects. “Shouldn't we start by looking on the ground floor? I mean, that is where we last saw them.”
Ragatha frowns at her. “I don't know if that's such a good idea Pomni… things were pretty intense down there.”
Good point. And considering the fact it’s definitely been spreading this whole time, there probably isn't much that can be looked through. But she can't just leave it unchecked. What if one of them is stuck down there? Even if she can't find Caine she doesn't want Kinger and Jax to be alone. Kinger would probably get himself thrown right into the whole mess, and Jax…
As tense as things are between them, she would never leave someone alone like that at a time like this.
“Fine. Then I'll go alone.”
“Wait– Pomni!” Ragatha calls out, but Pomni has already started running back the way they came.
“You keep looking up here! I'll be careful, don't worry!” She calls over her shoulder.
She sees the shocked look on the other's faces as they stare after her, but they're either too surprised to follow her or don't want to stop her.
Pomni faces forward.
She's not leaving anyone behind.
♥
⟪════════╩════════⟫
Why?
Why don’t they love him? Why did it have to be this way?
The sudden stinging in his eyes is alarming. Even more so when his vision starts to blur.
Is he…
Crying?
Him?
No… No this– this can’t be right.
He doesn’t cry.
He’s never cried. He’s the fun and wacky Ringmaster of The Amazing Digital Circus! Made to smile with the biggest grin, you can’t help but join in! It’s in his official character description!
So then why don’t they smile when he’s around?
It’s all he was made to do, he has to be good at it.
It’s his entire reason for existing.
His tears hit the floor. Caine curls in on himself, filled with an overwhelming sense of dread.
He’s bad at his job.
The developers must have known it. That’s why they gave up on him. That’s why all the humans here never smile. Why they all want to leave. He isn’t doing what he’s supposed to.
They must hate him.
Everything hurts so much.
No matter how tight he hugs himself it doesn’t help.
He needs this feeling to go away.
Why won’t it go away?
He floats down, not bothering to try and get his legs to stand. Instead he sits, sinking into the floor beneath him, the wall to his back.
He deserves to be down here. Useless and pitiful. Not that anyone here would feel sorry for him anyway.
They’ll never love him.
They’re unhappy because of him. Because he isn’t good enough. Just like he wasn’t good enough for his developers.
And just like the developers they want to leave him behind.
Why couldn’t he have just been better? Better at his job, better at fulfilling his purpose.
None of this is fair.
They were supposed to smile.
This whole time he thought the developers were failing to reach out to him.
But he’s the one that failed.
He is a failure.