belladothprotesttoomuch
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heavy-duty: this machine can take all kinds of loads by belladothprotesttoomuch
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV)
27 Jul 2025
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Summary
"Aziraphale couldn’t have been happier to have finally put his apprehensions behind him, abandoning his station in Heaven once and for all, and joining Crowley in a mutual decision to abandon their mortal possessions and move into a cozy cottage in the South Downs. For the first time in over six thousand years, he was truly happy.
That was, until he wasn’t.
You see, Aziraphale had a problem. There was just one minor flaw, a single thing that wasn’t picture-perfect in his new, picture-perfect life.
To put it plainly: Aziraphale was horny. Extremely so. The problem was: he was ninety-nine percent sure Crowley wasn’t interested in that kind of relationship. And Lord knew he’d tried."
Or: the one where Aziraphale turns to porn to cope with his husband's tight-fitting trousers, and gets more than he bargained for when an unsuspecting washing machine jump-starts his sexual awakening.
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Crowley had it coming. Sort of. He had a habit of making a nuisance of himself whenever boredom struck. Not that he was proud of it or anything. It was just that irritating the angel proved fairly easy, and he’d been bored more often than not these days, what with being a retired demon and all that. So Crowley’s latest prank may have gone a bit overboard when he reorganized the shelves to follow the Dewey Decimal System perfectly.
Naturally, that’s how he ended up naked, bound, gagged, and blindfolded on an otherwise pleasant summer afternoon.
Crowley reorganizes the bookshop. Aziraphale reorganizes Crowley’s attitude.
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Entrapment (The Nanny and the Gardeners) by belladothprotesttoomuch
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
30 Nov 2024
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In a cunning feat of trickery, the fearsome Nanny Ashtoreth plants a mischievous idea in the sweet but absent-minded gardener of the Dowling estate. But when the angel is caught misbehaving, Nanny doesn’t miss a chance to deliver a lesson that is anything but heavenly.
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What is a Grinder? by belladothprotesttoomuch
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
27 Feb 2024
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Summary
Aziraphale is sitting down at a table for two at the flaunty Ritz, nervously awaiting for his date’s arrival. Crowley, the man whose company he has rented for the evening, stood out to him from the many candidates in the hookup app for his tasteful (though sensuous) pictures and his fiery red mane of hair. An evening of new experiences and pleasure stretches before them, and after they have shared a plate of oysters and a bottle of wine, Aziraphale will get in touch with his dominant side, and Crowley will once again be reminded of how much he loves to please.
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Whisked Off My Feet by belladothprotesttoomuch
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
15 Feb 2024
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Summary
Aziraphale is reminded of his pandemic-acquired hobby of baking due to the upcoming Valentine’s Day holiday. And he knows just who he wants to be his Valentine. Safe to say, things do not go as planned as millennia-long secrets come to light.
Recent bookmarks
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Aziraphale’s hands slide forward on Crowley's thighs, infinitesimally. “I am very, very grateful, and I was so disappointed you didn’t allow me to thank you in that beautiful car of yours.”
After the magic show in 1941, Furfur and his Nazi friends take a little longer to get backstage, giving Aziraphale plenty of time to thank Crowley for all his help.
Bookmarked by belladothprotesttoomuch
07 Nov 2025
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Where the Mountains Meet the Heavens by KannaOphelia
Fandoms: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens (TV)
30 Jan 2020
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Summary
"I don't want to let go of you. Never again."
"Crowley," Aziraphale breathed, and for one heady, impossible moment Crowley thought the miracle would be even bigger than he thought, that the embrace and the my darling would be followed with a kiss, because Aziraphale's gaze was on his mouth and there was a heat to it, as if it was tinged with desire as well as tenderness.
****
6,000 years of pining.Collaboration with the amazing Tamsly and lonicera_caprifolium as artists for the 2020 Good Omens Big Bang.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 37,718
- Chapters:
- 15/15
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 379
- Kudos:
- 1,117
- Bookmarks:
- 302
- Hits:
- 19,681
Bookmarked by belladothprotesttoomuch
02 Nov 2025
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every year is getting shorter (never seem to find the time) by ffonippop
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV)
21 Nov 2023
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Summary
Crowley realizes he is in love with Aziraphale in Rome. Of course, by then, there’s no turning back. This does not necessarily mean there’s going forward. Loving Aziraphale is punishable, forbidden in every sense of the word. But there’s nothing much that can be done about it.
Like a terminal illness, Crowley treats the enormity of his emotions the best he can, distracting himself from the impossibility of having a life with Aziraphale with his favorite vice— having mindless, meaningless sex with any human that bears a resemblance to the angel.
He feeds off fleeting desire (which can almost be mistaken for want). He survives off the attention of strangers (who can almost be mistaken for Aziraphale, in the dark). And he manages. It’s fine.
Only it would be much finer is Aziraphale got off his ass about it. Or got off on his ass about it.
Bookmarked by belladothprotesttoomuch
03 Aug 2025
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- Words:
- 21,991
- Works:
- 7
- Bookmarks:
- 100
Bookmarked by belladothprotesttoomuch
21 Aug 2024
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Summary
“So, let me get this straight,” Crowley said, dragging that r a little for best effect. “Your librarian asks for an escort, and the first person you think of is me?”
When tabloid reporter Anthony Crowley gets roped into posing as the loving partner of their intern’s fussy librarian friend for an infernal wedding in the country, he has an inkling that he won’t come out of that little spot of bother unscathed. There is more to Aziraphale than meets the eye, and soon Crowley will discover that relationships are not for the faint of heart.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 403,339
- Chapters:
- 42/42
- Collections:
- 9
- Comments:
- 4,541
- Kudos:
- 5,174
- Bookmarks:
- 1,309
- Hits:
- 251,104
Bookmarked by belladothprotesttoomuch
19 Aug 2024