Archive of Our Own ^beta

It was that time of year again; of course this event like every other event happened every year, but as the years went by Stiles started to hate this day more and more, and now he hated it with a burning passion.

It was New Year's Eve today; which meant that everyone would be together to celebrate it, which Stiles got of course, but it also meant that couples got to kiss each other on New Year's Eve when the clock struck twelve. That meant that Stiles - being Stiles - once again was alone on New Year's Eve.

Sure like a year or so ago he had dated a beautiful girl named Sarah; she was perfect for him, sweet, kind, geeky, and extremely sexy. The only problem was that she wasn't Derek. Which was sort of why he had dated her in the first place; to get over Derek, but it was also why their relationship hadn't worked out in the end. Stiles had tried so hard to get over Derek. He had tried to go on dates; both with girls and guys, but no one could measure up to Derek He had dated Sarah for a while before she dumped him, because she figured out that he was too in love with Derek.

So here Stiles was once again - alone on New Year's Eve. While 99.9 Percent of his other friends were coupled up with each other. Erica and Boyd, Danny and Ethan, Lydia and Jackson, and of course Scott not only had one hot significant other. He had two; both Allison and Isaac, which was so unfair to be completely honest.

He was happy for his friend though; he really was. He was maybe - just maybe - a tad jealous; everyone got to have someone, but Stiles was too unattractive and too hung up on Derek to ever actually be happy. The worst part; was that he and Derek were actually friends now, like really good friends. Stiles spoke to Derek every day, and if Stiles saw something funny then Derek was the first person he told.

Unfortunately; Stiles was the only one that had these feelings. Once again his love was unrequited. Sure Stiles should be used to it by now since he never got to get the girl or guy he wanted, and Stiles was pretty sure that Derek didn't even like him back because he showed no signs of it. None at all, and because Derek was actually perfect, funny, smart, caring and not to mention super attractive. While Stiles was just plain-looking; he still had a lanky flailing body that he had no control over. Why would Derek even look at him twice?

A big part of Stiles just wanted to skip the stupid celebration; knowing that the wolf pack would start watching a movie, and then someone - aka Scott - would end up suggesting that they would all do something else, and that 'just' happened to be super romantic. Stiles was pretty sure that Scott was using it as an excuse because he just wanted to sex up Allison and Isaac, but also because he was trying not so lightly to make Stiles make a move on Derek. Stiles wasn't going to go there; he and Derek had moved past from being enemies to being actual friends, and he wasn't going to screwing that up He had already told Scott on more than one occasion to give it up, but Scott was not listing at all to Stiles; he claimed that he just wanted Stiles and Derek to be happy - that jerk. As much as Stiles wanted to skip tonight's celebration; he knew that he couldn't, because that would be unfair to Derek, and at least if Stiles went then Derek didn't have to be alone with all the couples.

A few hours later; almost everyone from the pack was together at Derek's loft. Except for Derek who was out getting a dozen pizzas for everyone, since two thirds of the pack were actual wolves, they needed a lot of food. Stiles had volunteered to go with him, but Derek insisted on going out alone.

Over the years; the pack had helped decorate Derek's loft, so itlooked extremely cosy compared to what it had looked like before. Stiles had been the biggest influence in helping Derek decorate the loft. it was Stiles that had made sure that Derek had gotten comfortable leather couches and chairs, not to mention the giant flat screen TV with a surround sound system, and a blu-ray dvd player.

Everyone had only been at the loft for half an hour or so, and the pack was already being all couple like. On one couch Danny and Ethan were already making out, and Jackson was sitting next to them with Lydia in his lap while he was caressing her neck. Boyd was sitting in the chair with Erica curled up on him; Boyd was kissing her temple. On the other couch, Scott and Allison was sitting with Isaac in their laps; Allison was caressing Isaac's hair and Scott was resting his head against Isaac's neck, there was just enough room for him and Derek on the couch next to them.

Stiles was happy that his friends were happy; He really was, but he had to look at them being romantic and loving to each other all the freaking time, and sometimes it did nothing but make Stiles feel even more alone than he already was.

Since everyone was already seated then one again Stiles' had to play the mother of the pack. Deep down he didn't mind so much, but usually the pack mom got some advantages from the pack father. That was still Derek even through Scott was the Alpha now. Derek was still the one who fed the entire pack and he made sure they still got together regularly to movie nights, birthdays, holidays, and pack meetings and so on. Since everybody nominated him as pack mom; he had to make sure there were enough plates, glasses, and soda to put into the living room from the kitchen.

Everyone was in a discussion about what they were going to watch, but everyone knew that Lydia would end up choosing this time. Just like every other time before, because Lydia was the head bitch in charge, and she was amazing at convincing people so she could get her way.

"We should watch Star Wars!" Stiles insisted from his place in the kitchen. That made everyone either groan or mutter out a no.

"What about the Harry Potter series? We could hold a marathon and watch all eight movies," Scott suggested.

"Nope, you guys already forced me to watch those more than once, and they aren't that good," Lydia commented from Jackson's lap.

"Yeah. What's so special about a guy and his wand… unless he was actually playing with his wand, now that I would want to see" Erica agreed smirking.

"ERICA!" Everyone else basically yelled out annoyed and Erica cackled evilly.

"Take what you said about the Harry Potter series back though! They are awesome," Scott said.

"No. They suck." Lydia insisted, and she had that look in her eye that meant trouble for everyone else. "You know what we should watch though? I think we should watch The Notebook," Lydia insisted while she was smirking deadly, almost as if waiting for anyone to disagree with her.

Jackson groaned, obviously not happy with the suggested choice.
"Lyds', I am not watching that movie again with you, it sucks so much," Jackson argued.

"If you don't do this for me; then guess who's not doing any sucking for you. Trust me hun', you should do a little of sucking for my benefit because I suck plenty for yours" Lydia said smirking.

That had everyone but Jackson roaring with laughter, and before anyone could protest; Lydia spoke again. "Anyone else have anything against us watching The Notebook? I'll have you know that Erica and Allison don't have a problem with it; since they wanted to watch it anyway, which means that the pain will be over for Scott, Isaac and Boyd, sooner rather than later if they agree to with it now. Danny and Ethan don't get a say in it, because we all know that the only reason that they are here is so that they can feel each other up on the couch, and before you protest Stiles, you promised to watch the movie with me before the year was over. We haven't watched it yet, so you really don't get a say in it either. I guess we're watching the Notebook after all then aren't we?" Lydia smirked knowing that she had won, and had gotten her way once again.

"Whatever," Stiles called out from the kitchen as he made sure everything was ready to go into the living room.

Of course that was the time that Scott chose to come into the kitchen and have a little talk with Stiles. Stiles knew what he wanted; they've had this talk so many times before, and Stiles didn't want to hear it.

"Maybe you should just tell Derek how you feel; like tonight, we're gunna' go somewhere romantic after the movie and you can tell Derek h-"

"Can we just not do this Scott," Stiles sighed, feeling defeated.

"Dude, I just want you to be happy," Scott stated softly.

"Yeah; I get that, but what am I supposed to do huh? Am I just going to go over to him and say how much I can't even fucking stop thinking about him? How I can't get over him even though I have tried a million times already, and for what Scott? So that he can laugh at my face at how pathetic I am, so that he can tell me that he would never feel the same? I don't think so Scott, so could you just let this go? oh and while you're in the kitchen; help me get everything into the living room," Stiles sighed and took the sodas leaving Scott alone in the kitchen with the plates and the glasses.

"Fine." Scott muttered, and took the remaining things on the counter into the living room.

When Stiles went into the living room; everyone turned to look at him with worried looks, well, almost everyone since Jackson was still an ass-hole, but he still looked slightly worried. To make matters worse for Stiles; Derek was sitting on the couch and talking with Isaac. He also turned to look at Stiles, and for a minute Stiles wondered if Derek had heard his conversation with Scott, since everyone else had seemed to have eaves dropped, and they had probably told the rest of the pack what was going on. Fucking werewolves and their stupid super-hearing.

Stiles stopped in his tracks fearing that Derek had come back just in time to 'over hear' his stupid confession; now he was just waiting for the humiliation that was Derek rejecting him in front of all their friends, but Derek seemed to sense his distress so he smiled shyly at Stiles. Other than that; he showed no outward signs that he had heard anything, and that made Stiles let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding and he smiled back at Derek.

Stiles went over to table and he put the sodas down before sitting next Derek. When Scott came into the living room a while later he placed the items onto the table, and sat next to Isaac. He shot Stiles wounded puppy eyes filled with worry. Stiles sighed and ignored him.

After that; everyone had started to eat, and they had made sure that The Notebook was in the player, so they started to watch the movie, which had Derek leaning a bit closer into the space between him and Stiles.

"Are you okay?" Derek whispered softly, his breath hot on Stiles' neck.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Stiles mumbled back.

Derek could probably tell that he was lying by his change in heartbeat, but he didn't comment on it.
Stiles kind of hates that they end up watching The Notebook; because it was his mother's favorite film of all time and Stiles watched it with her countless of times, especially when she was in the hospital. After she died he could quote the entire movie, from start to finish. He hadn't been able to watch the movie for years without crying, and the only person who knew that was Derek. On her anniversary last year he had missed her so much that he had broken down, and had a panic attack. Luckily he had been hanging out with Derek that day, and Derek had helped him out of his panic attack by holding Stiles in his arms, and soothingly patted Stiles' back. Derek; in return had opened up to him, and he had told Stiles about how Laura used to drive him up the wall. He told Stiles several of stories about his family until Stiles had opened up about his mom.
Stiles had told Derek how much his mother had loved The Notebook; he had cried the whole time too, but Derek hadn't cared about that at all, and afterwards he had never treated Stiles any differently because of that day. That was when Stiles knew that he was too hung up on Derek, and that he would never ever get over him.

Derek was looking at Stiles all through the movie, and then half way through the movie his mother's favorite scene came on.

Noah pulls the boat up on shore while Allie walks away but comes storming back.
Allie:"Why didn't you write me? Why? It wasn't over for me, I waited for you for seven years. But now it's too late."
Noah:"I wrote you 365 letters. I wrote you every day for a year."
Allie:"You wrote me?"
Noah:"Yes... it wasn't over, it still isn't over."
Noah grabs Allie's face and kisses her passionately.

Stiles quietly mouthed each word with silent tears falling down Stiles' face. Derek reached for Stiles' hand and laced their fingers together and he gives Stiles' hand a little squeeze, to which Stiles gives Derek a shy smile.

Throughout the rest of the movie Stiles' and Derek's fingers were laced together; it felt nice, normal even, it kind of felt like they should have always been doing this, and Stiles couldn't help but feel like this wasn't fair. He was being given a glimpse of what it would be like to be with Derek, but it would soon enough be taken away from him and he would never get to experience the real thing. It was so unfair, why did everyone else get to be happy? Why was he the only one that didn't ever get what he wanted?

As the movie ended; Scott just had to ruin it all, the jerk, and as much as Stiles loved Scott, he just need to let Stiles' feelings for Derek go.

"Do you know what we should do now? We should go to the hill! It would be so awesome to see the fireworks from there, and the view over the town is amazing," Scott insisted happily, and almost everyone seemed to agree with him, apart from Stiles and Derek who both shot death glares at Scott.

"What?" Scott asked in his best innocent voice and shooting both of them puppy dog eyes.

"I hate to agree with him, but the dummy over there has got a point," Jackson agreed for once; while insulting Scott, sure, but he was still agreeing with him, and Jackson rarely agreed with anyone. It didn't matter that he had won Lydia back from Aiden, Jackson hadn't changed at all, he would forever remain a jerk.
Lydia hit him at the back of his head and glared at him. Since she didn't tolerate any of Jackson's bullshit; especially not when he was a jerk towards her friends. Her and Scott might not be best friends, but they gotten to become pretty close friends over the years anyway.

"I don't feel like going," Stiles disagreed, not wanting to be around the happy couples all night.

"Oh come on Stilinski! We'll all go, and you can sneak off and go fuck with Derek somewhere. Unless you would rather stay here and him fuck you," Jackson snickered. Lydia elbowed him in the ribs and glared at him; she especially didn't tolerate it when Jackson was mean to Stiles. They had definitely become best friends; it was always him that she was watching chick flicks with, and she was always giving him makeovers.

"JACKSON!" Everyone else yelled out; both Scott and Derek ware sending him death glares.

"Stiles just ignore Jackson! He's a jerk that won't be getting any for a long time," Lydia said and glared at Jackson again.

"Yeah Stiles come with us, it'll be fun!" Scott insisted; sending Stiles' puppy dog eyes once again.

"No, it's honestly fine you should all just go on without me" Stiles unlaced his finger from Derek's, and he got up taking the plates into the kitchen.

Stiles started to wash the plates annoyed and muttered under his breath: "Stupid Jackson, and stupid couples and stupid everything!" He was so caught up in his own world; that he didn't hear anyone went through the door to the kitchen.

"Are you okay?" Derek asked quietly; startling Stiles slightly.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just don't want to go with everyone, you know?" Stiles said honestly.

"Yeah, and I kind of get why… because I heard your conversation with Scott…" Derek said with his best poker face.

That made Stiles turn around. Looking down on the ground he wrung his hands together; he wasn't shocked, because of course Derek had heard everything, and of course he had waited till after the movie, so that while they were 'alone' he could reject him. That was just freaking perfect, wasn't it? Stiles took a deep breath and prepared himself for the worst.

"Oh, you did? Of course you did, look man we can just-" Stiles started to say but Derek cut him off.

"I know that's why you don't want to go to the hill with everyone else. That's okay, you should go. Go to the guy you like and give him a New Year's kiss, I know it's what you really want, and everyone will understand it. Stiles, you think about everyone else besides yourself. For once you should do what you want to do, okay?" Derek admitted and looked at Stiles seriously.

Stiles just looked at him shocked, he wasn't truly understanding what was going on here, was Derek telling him that he didn't like him? Stiles had been so sure of it all this time, now he was just utterly confused.

After a while Derek sighs, and puts his hand on Stiles' shoulder and squeezes it gently. "Look; whoever he is, he is an idiot if he doesn't love you back," Derek let out a shaky breath, almost like he was holding in his own emotions. He looked away almost sadly and let go of his shoulder and turned around to leave.

Stiles' heart was pounding in his chest; this had to mean what he thought it did, didn't it? Derek had to like him back, otherwise why would the thought of Stiles being in love with someone else bother him so much?

Stiles grabbed Derek's wrist gently and he turned towards Stiles with a look of confusion on his face.

"I don't need to do that," Stiles said bravely, even though the butterflies in his stomach were getting worse by the second.

"Why?" Derek asked unsure.

"Because the guy that I'm in love with...is standing right in front of me" Stiles laced their fingers together gently.

"What?" Derek looked at their fingers that were laced together, while worrying his bottom lip absently, and then at Stiles again.

"Derek- Stiles took a breath -I'm in love with you" He stated and was grinning wide.
Derek tried to remove his fingers from Stiles', but Stiles held onto him with a tight grip. Derek didn't look at Stiles; he just tried to look vaguely interested in the floor.

"You shouldn't be with me. Everything I love dies, and everything I touch burns..." Derek trailed off quietly.

Stiles stepped closer to Derek's personal space, and gently put his hand under Derek's jaw, making Derek look at him in the eyes.

"Derek, do you love me?" Stiles questioned him quietly.

"Yes, but Stiles; I used to treat you so horribly. I pushed you into walls, I hurt you. We basically hated each other… deep down you know that you would be better off without me." Derek argued; his eyes slipping between electric blue, and his normal light shamrock.

"Okay, power down there sour-wolf. First off, we face bad guys all the freaking time, and while it isn't pretty, we still all get out of it alive don't we? Secondly; you've been through a lot okay? Paige, Kate and your family's house burning down wasn't your fault, so stop blaming yourself. Thirdly that was years ago, and we didn't like each other back then, and I was just annoying you half of the time because I could, so no hard done okay? That was in the past and it's forgotten now!" Stiles looked at him fiercely and stood his ground; he wouldn't let go of this. He finally had a chance to be happy and he would not throw it away.

"Are you sure?" Derek asked in a broken voice; almost as if he was waiting for Stiles to take everything he said back, and run away.

"Yes! Look I'm not going to force you to do this if you really don't want to; just know that I've tried for years to get over you, but it never worked. Do you want to know why? Because I have loved you for years now, and I never thought that you would ever feel the same, and it broke my heart, but I didn't say anything because I didn't want to ruin this friendship, because the thought of not having you in my life at all, hurt me more than the idea of never telling you," Stiles admitted sadly.

"Of course I want this. I've been in love with you too for years, but I thought I was too fucked up, too damaged for you to even want to be with me." Derek admitted bravely.
"Then I guess we were both idiots," Stiles said and smiled lovingly at Derek, before he closed the distance and kissed him.

The kiss was far from perfect; Stiles was way too eager. The angle wasn't perfect, and Derek accidentally bit Stiles' lip, but it was them, and they had all the time in the world to make the kissing right, because neither Stiles nor Derek was giving each other up any time soon, if not ever. Derek brought his hands to Stiles' hips; grounding himself in the kitchen. It was just Stiles and Derek, nothing seemed to matter when they were connected by the pressure of lips.
When they pulled apart Derek rested his forehead on Stiles' forehead; breathing a little raggedly.

"We should get back in the living room; the others are probably waiting for us so they can go to that stupid hill" Derek muttered.

Stiles removed his hand from under Derek's jaw, and his forehead from Derek's, but he kept their fingers laced together, as he went through the door to the kitchen, into the living room.

After they arrived at the hill; the couples split into different directions. Ethan and Danny continued to feel each other up while they were lying on the grass, those perverts. Lydia and Jackson went for a walk; probably so Lydia could give Jackson a lecture about him being nicer to their friends. Boyd was walking around with Erica on his back, they're both laughing about something one of them had said. Isaac, Allison and Scott were chasing each other while they were playing a game of tag, honestly they were still children at heart if you ask Stiles.
While Stiles and Derek; they were cuddled up under a tree a bit away from everyone else.

When the countdown for the new year begins; Derek holds Stiles close and kisses his cheek, and Stiles can't help but think that he's right where he's supposed to be.

He leans into Derek's broad chest and whispers happily: "Happy new year Derek,"
"Happy new year, Stiles." Derek responds just as happily, and at the start of the new year Stiles does get his perfect New Year's kiss, so after all it seems like Stiles finally got the man of his dreams, and really, what could be more perfect than that?