Archive of Our Own ^beta

the late afternoon sun streamed in through the windows that had been opened slightly to allow for a breeze to wander through. the birds outside sang a song; melodic and sweet to accompany the lovers' warm embrace.

"you know i love you, right?"

"mmm yeah" yoongi mumbled, drawing a soft chuckle from the younger.

it was a sunday and neither of them was planning to do anything besides basking in the sun together, enjoying each others company; jimin rereading pride and prejudice for the fifth time, and yoongi curled up against his side. their only plan was to stay cuddled up together and whisper sweet nothings to each other, even though there was no one else to hear them. they were content. they were in love.

the previous day, saturday, was spent lazily wandering around an art museum, admiring all of the beautiful artworks that held small fragments of history, stilled in a moment of time for the future to pick apart and digest.

despite being surrounded by countless paintings and sculptures, all jimin could focus on was his partner, yoongi. clad in an outfit that brought out their pure softness with a touch of art hoe, jimin's eyes were constantly fixed on them, admiring every soft curve and detail as if it would be the last time he would look at them. the way their long eyelashes fluttered against their cheeks when they blinked, the subtle pout of their lips when they spoke, the way their cherry pink hair almost sparkled in the light; jimin can’t pinpoint the exact moment he fell in love with yoongi, all he knows is that it steadily built up over time, from the moment he first saw them, with their ethereal makeup and oversized lilac hoodie, too far into the future, surpassing the present. what struck jimin the most, however, was how comfortable and bold yoongi was about their identity.

(jimin didn’t have the time to look up from his book and process what was happening before the person sat in front of him suddenly blurted out a "hi i'm min yoongi nice to meet you, first things first i'm not a dude i'm agender meaning i don't identify as any gender and if you have a problem with that you can fuck off," all in one breath.

"h-hi, um, i’m jimin, if you don't have a gender then what should i call you? i wouldn't want to offend you," jimin stuttered out, taken back by the sudden boldness of the elder's presence.

at first, yoongi was startled with the immediate consideration of the younger boys response, after initially expecting some kind of intrusive questions or just plain rudeness, whether intended or not.

"i use neutral pronouns, so they/them,"

"ah i see, excuse me for this but how should i use those? would they just be replacing he or she?"

yoongi nodded slowly, again startled by his consideration, before letting out a "yeah, pretty much," with a relieved smile.)

jimin had never really come across anyone like yoongi before, but others came first and he always wanted to make sure everyone was comfortable. but he was also slightly confused as he wasn't aware of the concept of not having a gender as he was brought up being told that there were only two genders. however, he accepted yoongi immediately and brought them into his life. he made sure to shower yoongi with compliments and validation whenever they were feeling insecure to ensure the elder that they were beautiful and gorgeous and so otherworldly amazing that jimin could only just step back and watch in awe at the seeming angel in front of him.

on days where yoongi’s insecurities became unbearable, they would question everything, from the universe to their identity, to why mother turtles just leave their babies to fend for themselves. jimin was patient and kind, however, so he always had sweet smelling bath bombs and fluffy blankets at hand to be ready to soothe yoongi and to attempt to get them into a safer frame of mind when necessary.

but at that moment in the art gallery, despite believing it couldn’t be possible, jimin was able to fall in love with yoongi all over again. he was in love with everything about yoongi. how passionate they were about art and social issues, the soft features of their skin, their willingness to fight anyone that gives them shit despite their sweet exterior, how caring and selfless they can be to literally anybody, how much love they are able to offer anyone and everyone, but especially the love they keep reserved for jimin.

jimin couldn’t ever imagine life without yoongi. they gave him the motivation to keep going when all hope seems lost. they were that light in the darkness showing him that his struggles don’t and will not last forever and that there is always something positive to look forward to on the other side. yoongi was jimin's anchor; they kept him grounded, attached to reality when all he wanted to do was to float away. yoongi was a rose, at first glance, appearing all sweet and delicate and vulnerable, threatening to break at the slightest touch, but as soon as you dared to hurt them, they weren’t afraid to fight back. they were strong and jimin admired that so much.

“hey, hey jimin, earth to jimin,” yoongi was waving in front of jimin’s face as he blinked back to life, coming out of his trance and back onto planet earth.

“i’m good i’m good,” he reassured his lover who just had a gentle smile on their face.

“you were staring at me with so much love in your eyes i thought you were going to burn a hole straight through me,” joked yoongi. jimin hadn’t noticed how long he had zoned out for, but he was too in love with yoongi to even care about anything. he let out a wholesome laugh and took yoongi's hand in his own, interlocking their fingers.

“i love you.”

“i love you too, sweetheart. ramen when we get home?”

“of course my prince charming” yoongi gave jimin that precious gummy smile of theirs and their eyes twinkled. jimin could swear yoongi held entire galaxies in those eyes.

there were two sides to yoongi; the outgoing person radiating confidence that they would show to the world, and then there would be the small and vulnerable person that they only allowed jimin to see. and to this, jimin only admired yoongi even more, because it meant they trusted him to see a part of themself that no one else was allowed to see.

curled up against jimin's side on that warm sunday afternoon, yoongi was as small and vulnerable as ever, but they were safe. here, jimin could protect them from all harm, gently stroking their hair and whispering soothing words and melodies to fight off the waging wars in their head.

when yoongi was unable to defend themself, jimin was always there. sometimes there would be blood, other times there would just be an angry exchange of words and a hissed dismissal. yoongi always said that it wasn’t necessary, that they can look after themself, but jimin knew that yoongi was secretly thankful for jimin and everything he does.

by the time evening started to approach, the two lovers were already fast asleep, wrapped up in each others warmth, legs tangled and arms around each other. the only sounds being their gentle snores and the buzz of seoul outside. their life was simple, being two artists they could work from within their own little apartment, making money from mini exhibitions they held and the occasional sale of a painting or two. it wasn’t easy, but as long as they had each other, it was all they needed. they were doing what they loved whilst being with people they loved.

it was as if they were in a world of their own; they took everything slow and steady, nothing was rushed. sex would be soft and slow and full of love with a sweet record playing quietly in the background. kisses and heart eyes would be exchanged before they soon drifted off to sleep in each other's arms. maybe one day they’ll speed up, fall back into line with the rest of the world, but for now, they were content with going at their own pace. they were, after all, in love, and when you’re in love you’re on your own timeline, almost like you’re on your own planet.

before jimin, yoongi was never a morning person. mornings meant having to leave their safe space and go out into the world. some days it could be bearable, but other days yoongi could do nothing but lie frozen in fear under the bed sheets; sometimes with reason, sometimes the anxiety monster just came and attacked them out of nowhere.

before jimin, people weren’t so accepting of yoongi’s identity. they would throw slurs and insults at them, asking intrusive questions and shouting at them to ‘dress like a man for fuck's sake’. their parents were no better; as soon as yoongi was able to afford a small shitty apartment on the other side of town, they packed up and left with no more than a note saying to not bother looking for them. from then on, they started trying to make a living as an artist, and when that was proving difficult, they applied for whatever jobs available. but soon enough they found themself struggling to balance three jobs and college at the same time. by then, yoongi was almost at that point of being that stereotypical queer starving artist.

but soon enough, in the library one day at college, yoongi saw this angelic creature sitting alone at a table. he had dirty blonde hair and the plumpest lips - yoongi thought they were going to die just by looking at those goddamn lips - and was holding a heavy looking book with his small hands; he was utterly adorable. for these exact reasons, yoongi found themself walking towards the boy's table, with all the fears of being invalidated completely forgotten, and sat down in the chair opposite the boy. from the close proximity, yoongi could see the boy was reading a book on art theory and wondered if he was majoring in fine arts too.

before either of them could assess the situation yoongi was blurting out an introduction, too struck by the boy's beauty in front of them to filter anything. this boy gave yoongi a feeling of warmth and safety, but he didn’t know why and it was confusing. but what took yoongi by surprise the most, however, was how quick the boy was to process the information and respond with something genuine and considerate instead of being an asshole. yoongi was right - they could feel safe around him.

following that first encounter, yoongi and jimin became closer, and over time, inseparable. they were both majoring in fine arts, so with that in common, they instantly clicked. yoongi also learned that jimin danced in his spare time - hence those thighs jesus christ - and that he loved reading. his favourites were classics because they are a glimpse into the minds of people from the past, and how they perceived different things to us and their attitudes towards things. jimin found it absolutely beautiful.

as time progressed, they developed this invisible bond between them, one that couldn’t be broken no matter what. it was like they were soulmates, destined to find each other. jimin made a vow to himself and yoongi that he would protect them with his life - it may sound dramatic, but he had come to know the vulnerable side of yoongi and how broken they really were under the hard exterior. too many times he had walked in on them sobbing their heart out under their bed covers, wishing and praying to be different, to be ‘normal’, and each time jimin's heart broke just a little bit more. but every time without fail, jimin was by yoongi’s side, rubbing circles into their back and telling them that they are beautiful and amazing and the most wonderful person on earth and they should never change for anyone. when the tears stopped flowing so heavily and the sobs stopped sounding so harsh, jimin would run yoongi a bath with a sweet smelling bath bomb and light scented candles around the bathroom to make the atmosphere as calm and safe as possible. at first, jimin would leave yoongi to relax in the bath in peace, but one day, with a small voice, jimin was asked to stay. he hesitated for a moment, not quite sure what yoongi was implying, but complied anyway. he undressed and slipped into the bath behind yoongi so they were resting with their back against his chest. his arms snaked their way around yoongi's small waist and held them close. they stayed there in silence for a while, before yoongi suddenly chuckled quietly and shifted slightly, “dude we’re going to become gay prunes if we stay in here any longer.” to this, jimin laughed - something so heavenly and pure it could be mistaken for a choir of angels singing - and moved forward to lift himself out the bath along with yoongi.

they spent that night curled up together in bed, limbs tangled amongst each other. yoongi's head would be tucked against jimin’s chest and jimin would be delicately stroking their hair. this is usually how they would spend their nights together, but for some reason, after their moment in the bath, their close embrace seemed more than just purely platonic - their place in space and time was starting to shift, and so was their relationship.

now, four years after introducing themself to jimin in that library and a year after graduating from art school, mornings suddenly weren’t so bad. getting out of bed didn’t take as much effort because even if they left their bed, they wouldn’t be leaving their safe space, because jimin was now their safe space; jimin was yoongi’s home and as long as they were together, they were both safe. some mornings yoongi would wake up to jimin's soft snores next to them, and other mornings they would wake up to the smell of breakfast being prepared in their small kitchen.

now, because of jimin, mornings were yoongi’s favourite time of day, because every time they woke up to jimin, it reminded them that he was real and alive and not just a dream.

there was no clear moment where their relationship changed from platonic to romantic, it just gradually happened over time. there was no “will you go out with me” question, in a way, everything was unspoken.

their dates were as cliche as you would expect for two art hoes who were in love with each other. whenever they could, they would be wandering around an art exhibition. yoongi would be looking in awe at all the paintings, whereas jimin spent most of his time staring at yoongi, soaking in all the beauty around them. sometimes yoongi would catch jimin staring and give him a soft smile, and jimin would quickly look away, blushing and pretending to focus instead on a painting in front of him.

their relationship took a turn for the better on a warm summer's night. it was 2 am and they were lying on blankets in a field watching the stars above, pointing at different constellations and joking about what they looked like. they stayed there until the sun rose and birds started to sing. the sunrise cast an ethereally warm glow across yoongi’s soft features and jimin couldn’t help but say how beautiful he was. to this, yoongi blushed and softly denied it.

“no, really, i don’t think i’ve ever seen a piece of art as beautiful as you,” jimin propped himself up on his elbow and looked down at his friend next to him.

“well, that’s just offensive to the artists.”

“i’m sure they’ll agree with me.”

“nah,” yoongi opened their eyes and looked over to the boy next to them, seeing how the light of the sun glistened on his glossed lips.

“oh, hold on, what’s this,” jimin hurriedly pulled out his phone from his back pocket and put it to his ear as if he was answering a call. “oh, hi van gogh! yes- you think my dear friend yoongi is more beautiful than any painting ever created? i’m afraid i’ll have to agree with you there - yes, thank you, have a good day now, goodbye!” he put his phone down and looked back over to yoongi who was laughing quietly to themself.

“you’re so cute jiminie.”

“not as cute as you, though.”

“ohmygod, shut up,” yoongi laughed again and weakly hit jimin on the arm.

“make me,” jimin smirked, not knowing where that came from but at that point, he didn’t really care anymore. yoongi looked at him and sighed for a second before a small smile crept on their face. before jimin could process what was happening, yoongi’s strawberry glossed lips were pressed up against his own, slotting together comfortably as if they were designed for this. jimin felt as if his soul was leaving his body. he’s been kissed before but nothing felt as special as this particular moment. neither of them wanted it to end, both completely submerged in a paradise of their own, consisting only of their soft lips moving in sync as if they were performing a dance routine that determined their future. the wind through the trees in the distance and the birds created a soundtrack for their routine to follow. yoongi’s slender hands were gripping jimin’s blonde locks tightly as if their life depended on this, tugging and pulling to get a better angle.

jimin always dreamt about what their first kiss would be, assuming they would be together first before it happened, and making it extra special and horribly cheesy and romantic. he never expected for it to be at 5 am on a summer morning after a night spent lying in a field and watching the stars, never expected to pretend calling van gogh to prove to yoongi how beautiful they are, and never expected for it to happen after an awful cliche “make me”. however because it was so unexpected, it was made all the more special. it wasn’t planned so the kiss came from pure love and untainted feelings.

after not long enough, yoongi pulled away, eyes still closed and hands still in jimin’s hair, panting and slightly flushed. somehow they looked even more beautiful than jimin could even think possible - their lips were slick with spit, both theirs and jimin’s, their hair was sticking up in random directions, and the sun was still kissing their skin in places, making them glow like a golden angel. jimin thinks it was that moment when he knew he was in love with yoongi, however, he may have been in love for much longer than he realised. It was the same for yoongi. they always knew their feelings for the younger boy weren’t completely platonic, and they often found themselves wanting more out of their friendship; things friends don’t usually give. they wanted to go on sweet coffee shop dates with him and go on walks through the park and kiss him in the rain and the snow and the sun and on the beach and just wherever he could. he wanted to kiss jimin’s pain away, make him feel as safe and loved as he always made yoongi.