Chapter Text
Dick Grayson and Wally West meet on a Thursday, when Wally runs directly into Dick and spills Dick’s scalding hot coffee all over his very expensive shirt. Wally stops dead in his tracks, and stares in horror as Dick winces and pulls the ruined fabric away from his chest.
There’s a tense moment of silence where Wally thinks that he might have to bury himself in a hole and never come up for air, because he’s just spilled hot coffee all over Mr. Wayne’s son in the middle of a Wayne Enterprises lobby, on his first day of work.
Dear god, he’s so fired already and he hasn’t even really started yet, oh no, what has he done.
Wally’s expression is sitting somewhere between stunned and horrified when Mr. Grayson finally looks up at him. He’s expecting some sort of retribution and a blunt dismissal. Mr Grayson asking for his name and department so he can have Wally fired immediately. Some good all those super reflexes are doing him now.
But instead, what he gets is a blinding smile that is frighteningly similar to Nightwing’s, and a soft look in his eyes as they meet Wally’s.
Wally cannot stop himself from spewing words as soon as he locks eyes with him. “Mr. Grayson, I am so, so sorry, I wasn’t watching where I was going, I should have been paying more attention, I can… oh god, I don’t think I can afford to replace that shirt, but I can at least buy you a new coffee? Oh, shit, I’m so late, I’m so sorry, I really have to go, I can’t--”
Wally realizes only when Mr. Grayson cuts him off, that he’s been talking just a touch too fast.
“What’s your name?”
Oh god. Here it comes. He’s going to get fired right here, right now and then he’ll have moved all the way to Gotham for this job for nothing and it’s going to be a huge mess, shit. “Uh. Wally. Wally West. I’m supposed to be starting in the R and D lab today,” he says quietly.
Mr. Grayson’s smile doesn’t fade.
Wally winces.
“Hey, Wally, nice to meet you, I’m Richard Grayson. Most people call me Dick.”
Wally doesn’t stifle his laugh in time, and all of the color abruptly leaves his face. He is absolutely getting fired now.
“Don’t worry. I know how it sounds. English wasn’t my father’s first language,” Mr. Grayson says, his smile softening into something less blinding, more real. “You look kinda like you’re about to have a heart attack, Wally. Are you alright?”
“I’m not getting fired for this, am I?” Wally blurts out before he can think better of it.
Mr. Grayson just laughs, a sound that Wally thinks would make angels jealous. “Relax, man. It’s just a shirt and a cheap cup of coffee. I’ve got my uniform shirt up in my father’s office anyway, no big deal.” Right. Cause if this guy wasn’t already perfect enough, he’s also a cop, Wally remembers. “But I will take you up on that coffee. Saturday at two? Let me give you my number.”
Wally just blinks dumbly for a moment, and hands over his phone without processing what’s happening.
“I’ve gotta run, I have a shift starting in a little bit, but text me your address, and I’ll pick you up. And don’t worry. I’ll make sure your supervisor knows I’m the reason you were late so you won’t get in any trouble,” he says with a wink.
Wally nods along like he’s really processing what Mr. Grayson is saying and takes his phone back with a dopey grin.
It’s not until Mr. Grayson is already in the elevator that Wally actually realizes what just happened. He makes a surprised noise and goes through the rest of the day with a stunned smile fixed on his face. He’s never gotten a date that fast, let alone attracted the attention of such a perfect man.
~*~
It’s the first time Wally West has ever met Dick Grayson, but Dick Grayson has been waiting to ask out Wally West since he was sixteen.
~*~
Dick and Wally get on like a house on fire, it turns out. Dick already knew this. Wally is pleasantly surprised.
Coffee turns to Dick showing Wally around the city, turns to dinner, turns to a second date and a third and a fourth and Dick has a steady boyfriend before he knows it.
He’s happy. He’s in love. And he’s lying.
He feels fucking awful .
But Bruce had been very clear from the time he was a child. He was never to tell anyone else about his secret identity. Not even other heroes. Not even the man he’s pretty sure is the love of his life.
So Dick, as much as it pains him, keeps his mouth shut.
~*~
They’re dating for six months when there’s a knock on Dick’s apartment door in the middle of the night.
The League had spent several hours that day fighting off some wannabe big bad and playing clean up crew after, and Dick is nursing two cracked ribs and an impressive bruise on his hip and he’s sore and tired and he had to watch Wally get hurt and he couldn’t act like he wanted to towards him, because he was Nightwing, not Dick Grayson and he thinks he actually might kill whoever it is that’s on the other side of the door.
It’s Wally.
He’s wearing a hoodie he stole from Dick weeks ago, over top of…
Over top of his Flash uniform.
Dick’s jaw drops and he yanks Wally into his apartment, slamming the door shut behind him.
His mouth flaps like a fish for a moment before he waves a hand at Wally’s lower half and just says, “What?”.
Wally rubs the back of his neck with a pained look on his face and Dick’s look of concern only worsens as the silence stretches.
“I have something I need to tell you,” Wally says quietly, his voice rough and scratchy.
Dick can see the outline of the bruises on Wally’s throat that his accelerated healing hasn’t gotten to yet. Dick’s heart clenches in his chest as he remembers the fight with the witch earlier, his limbs leaden and held to the ground by her magic while she’d gripped Wally’s neck with preternatural strength. Donna had gotten a lucky shot at the witch’s side and she’d dropped Wally and lost her control on the spell she’d been holding over Dick, but there were a few moments where Dick felt like he was watching his parents fall all over again, watching Wally in pain and being able to do nothing about it.
But Dick Grayson didn’t experience any of that.
Nightwing did.
Dick can’t let Wally know that he knows what happened or he’ll give himself and his family away and he can’t let Bruce down like that, no matter how much every fiber of his being aches to tell Wally the truth.
So instead, he hides the pain pulsing through his body and lets his face fall into confusion and worry, which isn’t too far off from how he’s really feeling, but isn’t really all true either.
“Baby, what happened to you?” he asks, in his best scared civilian voice.
He wants to shudder as he says it, feeling filthy for lying to his boyfriend like this.
Wally takes a deep breath and holds a hand protectively over his side where Dick knows there’s a hole in his uniform, covered by the hoodie, from the spell that had taken him down, allowed the witch to get her hands on him in the first place.
“I’ve been keeping something from you. And I’m so sorry that I have because you don’t deserve to be lied to like this, cause I love you so goddamn much, and please don’t think that this was cause I didn’t trust you. Cause I do. I love you and I trust you with everything I am, but I just,” Wally has to stop talking for a moment, his face twisting into a pained grimace. “Sorry. I, uh. Well I guess I should just say it. I’m the Flash. I have been for a little while. Took the mantle from the last Flash. But I was Kid Flash before that. I’ve… I’ve been a hero for a long time. And I was keeping it from you because I thought it’d keep you safer. But I almost… I thought I was going to die, today, Dickie, and I would’ve died having never been honest with you and that thought was fucking terrifying , so I had to… I just had to tell you this and please don’t just stare at me, please say something, babe, please tell me I haven’t scared you away.”
Dick doesn’t think Wally breathed once through that whole speech.
He doesn’t answer, instead, reaches out for the hem of the hoodie Wally’s wearing, helping him take it off to reveal the uniform underneath. Wally doesn’t look him in the eye as Dick looks at him in the uniform. Dick can’t help but linger on the ugly patch of healing skin on Wally’s side.
“I’m so sorry I lied, Dick,” Wally whispers, raspy and quiet.
Dick gently takes Wally’s face in both of his hands and kisses him like his life depends on it. “Wallace West, you are nothing short of wonderful. I love you. I understand why you kept it from me. I’m not mad,” he says softly, against Wally’s lips. “I’m not mad. You haven’t scared me away.”
Wally sighs in relief and his whole body sags against Dick’s.
Dick has to bite back a shout of pain when Wally rest squarely against his injured ribs. Thankfully, Wally doesn’t notice. As much as he wants to reciprocate, Dick can’t tell his secret tonight.
Dick guides Wally into his bedroom and goes right for the first aid kit he keeps in his bathroom, but Wally waves him off. “I’m a speedster, I’ve got an enhanced healing factor, cause of how fast my cells do their thing.”
Nightwing knows this. Nightwing saw Wally get the all clear from Doctor Midnite and Zatanna. Nightwing had the Flash tell him that he was totally fine.
Dick Grayson knows none of this. So Dick acts surprised when Wally waves the first aid away and sets it aside like he doesn’t quite believe Wally.
“Why don’t I at least help you get this thing off. You can borrow some sweats? I’m not letting you out of my sight if you’re hurt, Speedy,” Dick says, an inside joke just for him.
“I was never Speedy! Speedy was Green Arrow’s sidekick! I was Kid Flash.”
“Baby Flash. Got it,” Dick jokes as Wally guides him through the releases on his uniform. Dick already knew where they all were, but he waits for Wally’s instruction anyway.
“No!” Wally protests indignantly, frowning up at Dick.
Dick just smiles and presses a kiss to Wally’s forehead and gently drags his uniform top off, brushing a stray strand of hair off of his forehead.
The wound in Wally’s side is uglier now that he can see it up close, without the shredded remains of his uniform in the way. His skin is mottled and burned and red and it makes Dick’s chest hurt to know he couldn’t stop this. He should have, but he couldn’t. He’d been immobile, useless, powerless to stop the witch from hurting Wally like this. And he can’t even apologize. Not as Nightwing, because Bats don’t admit fault like that, and not as Dick Grayson, because Dick Grayson was not there.
Dick’s fingers brush over the irritated skin next to the wound subconsciously and Wally winces, sucks in a harsh breath.
Dick recoils.
“Hey, it’s okay. I’ve… it sounds bad, but I’ve had worse. I’ll be totally fine by the morning. I can feel myself healing as we speak. It just hurts a bit now,” Wally says in an impossibly soft voice.
Dick just nods and purses his lips and turns to dig up a clean pair of sweatpants for Wally to wear. The quiet, pained noises Wally makes as Dick helps him out of his uniform pants and into a clean pair absolutely crush Dick. He does not show it.
Instead he gives Wally a soft smile and climbs into bed next to him.
He has to lie on his bruised hip to face Wally, and it’s a struggle to keep the pain from showing on his face, but he manages. At Dick’s request, Wally starts telling him stories about his career as a hero, and it’s easier to ignore the discomfort in his hip as he listens to Wally tell him stories he already knows.
Wally leaves out some details, and Dick smiles, knowing the little things that Wally’s keeping to himself, to keep Dick from worrying, or to make himself sound a little bit cooler, trying to impress his boyfriend. Like Dick hasn’t been impressed with him since the very first day the first Robin met the first Kid Flash.
They drift off just like that, Wally telling Dick stories and Dick tracing circles on Wally’s bare chest.
When they wake up in the morning, Wally’s side is completely healed true to his word.
Dick’s ribs scream at him as he sits up, the pain radiating down his side, the bruise on his hip aches dully and his face is throbbing. He groans and takes a moment to convince himself that getting out of bed is worth it. Wally stirs a little in his sleep, but otherwise doesn’t move when Dick gets up and heads for the bathroom. Wally may have super healing, but Dick does not.
He’s glad he was the first one up when he gets a look at himself in the mirror, noticing that a bruise has bloomed around his left eye, darkening from the barely noticable yellow it was yesterday to an ugly bluish color.
He’s also glad for his make-up skills. Yet another thing he’s held on to from his circus days.
He makes quick work of the black eye, and pulls his shirt to the side to work at the patch of the bruise that peeks out from over his pants, in case his shirt rides up. That one’s darker, takes more concealer and more time to cover up, but he does it, tugging down his shirt and sliding his little make-up bag away just as Wally nudges the bathroom door open with his toe.
“Morning, Gorgeous,” he says, voice still rough from sleep.
Dick forces a smile to his face, and leans forward to kiss the tip of Wally’s nose. “Hey, babe. How are you feeling? All better?” he asks, glancing down at the splotchy pink patch of skin on Wally’s side.
Wally smiles and nods, wrapping his arms around Dick’s waist. Dikc bites his tongue when Wally’s wrist rests right on his bruise. “All better. The magic makes it a little funky, so I think that spot might always be a little scarred and discolored like that, but other than that, I’m completely fine.” Wally tugs him closer and kisses him, and Dick can ignore the ache of his injuries in favor of tangling one hand in Wally’s wild red hair and deepening the kiss for just a moment.
Wally slips a hand under Dick’s shirt, and Dick’s breath stutters, and he has to pull back. His hand slips from the back of Wally’s head to rest in a fist on his chest instead. Dick drops his head, can’t meet Wally’s eyes. Wally removes his hands from Dick’s hips immediately, reaching up to cup the sides his face instead.
“I’m sorry,” Dick whispers, and he means he’s sorry for everything. He’s sorry for the lying and the sneaking around and the cancelled dates and the fact that he can’t even let Wally see him shirtless no matter how much he wants to take their relationship further. He’s sorry for all of it, but he doesn’t say any of that. “Don’t. Please. I’m sorry, I just… Walls, I can’t.”
“Hey, hey,” Wally says, and he sounds so soft and kind and understanding and Dick doesn’t know what he’s done to deserve a man so good. “It’s okay. You have nothing to apologize for. We don’t ever have to do anything more than you’re ready for.”
And how ridiculous is that? With the reputation Dick Grayson has in the media for being a womanizer just like his adoptive father, a reputation he has no idea how he got for the record, how ridiculous is it that Wally won’t even say the word ‘sex’ around Dick now, just because Dick’s slowed them down the few times it’s looked like they might be heading that direction.
He really, really doesn’t know what he’s done to deserve Wally West.
“How about I make us some breakfast? You should see how fast I can whip up a meal with the super speed and everything,” Wally jokes, pressing a soft, chaste kiss to Dick’s lips to punctuate his sentence.
Dick smiles into it and kisses him back and nods. He has some time before he has to leave for work. And besides, Wally looks happy at the idea of showing off for his boyfriend, and how could Dick say no that look?
Dick pulls on his uniform for his day job quickly once Wally leaves, and heads out into the kitchen after him. His boyfriend is dashing around in a blur of orange and lightning flashes. Dick smiles at the sight that’s all too familiar to him. Wally takes it as awe of the new development.
“It’s pretty cool, isn’t it?” Wally says, beaming at Dick as he sets out plates for them.
“Incredible. Just like you,” Dick responds.
~*~
They spend a lot more nights staying at one of their apartments together after that, though they don’t officially move in together.
~*~
They get into their first really serious fight two months after Wally reveals that he’s the Flash.
It’s right after the holidays, and therefore, it is also right after a lull in criminal activity. Even Gotham’s worst tend to take a break around the holiday season. So naturally, as soon as the season’s over, the villains and big bads and wannabes come back back in full force. In short, the League is kinda swamped.
Wally told Dick as much a few days earlier, after a third consecutive cancelled date night and a week of coming home later and later.
Dick, of course, was already well aware of this, but Wally can’t know that, so he just assures Wally that it’s okay and that he understands. Wally’s off saving the world. He’s a hero. Dick loves him, and he’s not upset and they are fine.
Nightwing meets the Flash in the field more often than not on these missions, they work well together and are good friends, despite the fact that Nightwing knows the Flash’s real name, and the Flash only knows Nightwing by his alias. Flash is always full of worry about the way he’s treating his boyfriend, and Nightwing finds it almost endearing.
And then there’s The Mission. Nightwing takes a hit that knocks him flat out during the mission and he has to sit the rest of it out. Flash takes him back to the WatchTower, and sits with him while he’s looked over.
They talk about nothing, the latest League gossip, and ridiculous stories about whatever nonsense Hal and Guy have gotten themselves into recently while Dick’s looked at, and a little while after they’re left alone before Flash’s face turns suddenly serious. He tugs off the cowl and puts his head in his hands.
“Wallman, what’s going on?” Dick asks, careful not to step over the line he’s drawn for himself. Nightwing is nothing more than Wally’s friend. He is not Dick Grayson right now.
Wally makes a wounded noise and lets out a long breath. “I think Dick’s cheating on me.”
And wow. Doesn’t that hit him like a ton of fucking bricks.
“What?” Dick says, disbelieving. Nightwing is concerned for his friend whose boyfriend is maybe cheating. Dick Grayson wants to know how he fucked up this badly.
“You know I told him I’m the Flash a couple months ago, right? Well we’ve been spending nights together more often than not since then. And like, things were going great at first, you know? He took it so well and he wasn’t mad that I kept it from him. He was so understanding. But then I started noticing him sneaking around at night, or coming home ludicrously late or sneaking back in always just a little after I come back from missions, and then he’s always saying he’s working on cases that keep him out late cause that’s when he can meet with informants and stuff, but I don’t know. God, I don’t want it to be true, cause I love him so fucking much but I don’t know what else he could be keeping from me,” Wally says, his voice quiet and slow in a way that’s entirely unlike him.
He promptly begins to feel like the world’s shittiest boyfriend. He’s not cheating, of course he’s not, Nightwing’s just been needed more than usual lately, and with the amount of time he’s spending with Wally, it’s been getting harder and harder to keep it hidden that he’s got a night job as a spandex-clad vigilante.
He wants to pull off his mask right then and there and tell Wally everything. He almost does. But he sees Bruce, Batman, in the doorway and he thinks better of it, knows he can’t do that. He can’t give away his identity, his family’s identities, on an impulse like that.
“I’m sorry Wally,” he says instead, watching Bruce over Wally’s shoulder. “Maybe you should just talk to him. I’m sure you can work it out.”
Wally looks like he’s going to say something more, but Bruce clears his throat then, and Wally jerks in surprise. “I’m gonna zip back planetside. Feel better ‘Wing. Nice talking to you as always Bats.” He gives a sad smile and a mock two-fingered salute and then he’s gone.
Dick glares at Bruce. The effect is kind of lost with the masks in the way, but he thinks he gets his point across.
Bruce taps at the command module by the door and seals the room off.
“I know you heard that,” Dick snaps as soon as the sequence completes itself.
“How are you doing?” Bruce asks, instead of addressing that.
Dick scoffs, swinging his legs off the side of the bed as he sits up. “I’m fine. I know you read my medical report the second it was input. That’s not the important thing right now. The hit I took was nothing. Just winded me. What’s important is that my boyfriend, who I love and care about, thinks I’m cheating on him because you won’t let me tell him who I am.”
“You know the risks.”
“Yeah, I know the risks, B! I’ve always known them! I know there’s a reason we keep our identities secret, but this is different! It’s not like he’s a random civilian or even a random League member. I love him. I trust him with everything I am. And I know he loves me back, and he’s kind and caring and so considerate, and he’s been entirely honest with me about being the Flash and all I’ve done in return is lie to him. I can’t even get changed in front of the man I’ve been dating for eight months cause I can’t let him see my scars. Do you know how awful that feels?”
Bruce says nothing.
“Course not. You’re the Batman. You’re above feeling an attachment like that.”
“Dick,” Bruce growls, and Dick immediately cows.
“Sorry, I know you care about us, I know that, just. This hurts. A lot. To not be able to be honest with him when I love him so much.”
“You know why you can’t. It’s for the best, to keep this all a secret.”
“Yeah, I know. Still feels like shit.”
Bruce unseals the room after that and leaves, satisfied that Dick is not severely injured and is not going to tell Wally that he is Nightwing.
Dick returns to Earth and changes into civilian clothes at a safehouse and heads back to Wally’s apartment where he was supposed to be the whole time.
Wally is standing in the kitchen, staring blankly at the countertop between his hands.
“Hey, you’re back,” Dick says, forcing cheer into his tone. He already knows how this conversation is going to go, and he knows it is not going to go well. “Did it go alright? Is everyone okay?”
“Everyone’s fine,” Wally mutters, and Dick sees that Wally’s phone is on the counter between his hands, that he’s actually staring at an open conversation. Dick just catches the Uncle Barry at the top of the screen before Wally shuts the phone off. “Dick we need to have a talk.”
The way Wally says that hits Dick like a punch to the gut. He tries not to let it show too much.
“About?”
Wally takes a deep breath, lets it out slowly, opens and closes his mouth a couple times like he can’t quite decide what to say.
In the end, it seems, he decides to dive right into the deep end with it. “Dick, are you cheating on me?”
Hearing it a second time doesn’t make it any easier.
Dick can feel his face fall, his shoulders slump. Entirely out of his control. Dick Grayson isn’t as good at concealing his emotions as Nightwing is.
“Wally, how could you say that?” Dick gasps, unable to keep the hurt out of his voice.
“Don’t lie to me. Don’t pretend you haven’t been sneaking around when I’m off on missions and when I go out to patrol at night, and don’t pretend you haven’t been blowing me off with the same ‘it’s for a case’ excuse for months. God, I don’t want this to be true, I don’t want to believe this, but you’re not leaving me with a whole lot of options.. I don’t know what else to think.”
Wally sounds even more hurt than Dick does, and that’s like a shot to the chest. It feels like maybe he’s swallowed a batarang, he’s having so much trouble swallowing around the sudden thing lodged in his throat, trying to strangle him as he watches the man he loves lose every ounce of hero and become every inch an average man.
Dick takes a step forward and Wally takes one back and Dick flinches.
“I’m not cheating on you. I would never. I’m so sorry I’ve been coming back so late and I’ve been so flaky and everything, I’m so sorry, we’ve just been really swamped at the precinct and my captain puts a lot of the extra work on me and Rohrbach cause she knows we’re clean, and that we can be trusted. We’ve just been working double time with this uptick in activity since the holidays are over and most of the CIs we have won’t meet us in the light of day and we need their intel so we’ve gotta go at night and… Wally, I love you with every fiber of my being. I would never cheat on you. Please. You have to believe me.”
Dick feels on the verge of tears by the time he’s done speaking.
He never had this problem when he dated Barbara. They never had to keep identities or nighttime activities from each other.
God he wishes he could just tell him. But that option is not on the table.
Wally nods slowly. “I want to believe you. I really do.”
“But you don’t, do you?”
“I love you, Dick.”
“But do you believe me?”
Wally doesn’t answer.
Dick nods. “I understand. Maybe I should go stay at my place tonight. Call me tomorrow, or whenever you’re feeling a little better about this?”
Wally makes a quiet noise of agreement.
Dick doesn’t even make it back down to his motorcycle before he’s crying.
~*~
Wally does call him the next day, and he apologizes to Dick for accusing him of something like that and he takes Dick out to dinner and he says that they can work through what’s probably just both of them being really stressed about work and he tells Dick that he loves him so many times.
Things look like they might not actually be as terrible as Dick thought they were last night.
Two days later, Dick learns Bruce has a son.
Damian’s barely settled in Gotham before Bruce is dead.
Dick breaks.