Archive of Our Own ^beta

There are two opened windows on Josh’s laptop screen. The smaller one shows an internet page of Google search. The bigger one is a Skype window with a constant connection with Tyler. They’ve been chatting for three hours already. This isn’t their record. Once, they had been talking for fourteen hours — on Christmas holidays at University, they spent the whole Saturday playing games and watching movies, using screen sharing. They didn't leave their devices for more than a minute, only to use the bathroom or grab something from the kitchen.

Now they’re adults but their habits are still the same. They talk about something unimportant or sit in silence, searching for an interesting stuff to share it with each other. To find something new, cool and not indexed by search engines, Josh gets interested in the deep web. But he doesn't stop here; later he checks several YouTube video guides about how to access the dark web and then downloads Tor browser. He isn't surprised finding out how much illegal stuff - drugs, porn or abuse - is available there. But he’s on the dark web for rare materials only, programs and anonymous chatting. Josh opens the tenth topic from different forums when he finds an interesting post by an unknown user. He opens the link to the program created by someone named Blurryface. The message asserts, it can predict the future. Josh screenshots it and sends it to Tyler, hearing the familiar voice in his earbuds immediately.

“What’s this?” Tyler stops tuning his guitar, getting closer to the webcam.

“I dunno. Wanna check?” Josh watches the way Tyler’s eyes run through the text.

“Sure! I’m dying to know my future with the help of a doubtful program made by the guy whose nickname’s so scary and shitty at once. Why not? Let’s do it!” Tyler nods, full of enthusiasm.

Josh smirks.

“Um… Are you downloading it?” Tyler puts his guitar away and takes his laptop. Josh unwittingly glances at the thin line of a bare skin with a happy trail as Tyler’s shirt rides up. His everyday look consists of a t-shirt, boxers and socks, and Josh can't object because everyone can wear whatever they want at home. Tyler opens the laptop wider and now the camera shows his face again.

“Josh?” he grins, trying to catch his friend’s sight.

“I’m trying to,” Josh mumbles, focusing on another part of the screen.

Tyler looks like he didn’t notice anything abnormal, he just asks Josh to turn screen sharing on.

“Wanna see your laptop getting hacked,” he explains.

Josh chooses an installation path and watches the loading bar fill. Finally, the program’s installed and he minimizes the browser window to find and open the new icon with a blurry image on his desktop.

“Well…”

The load window appears on the screen and Josh sees two empty forms where a new user needs to write their full name and a date of birth.

“Yours or mine?” Josh glances at Tyler, who musingly looks at the screen too.

“Hm, it’s easy: your laptop – my name.”

Josh agrees and types –

Tyler Robert Joseph

12/1/1988

Before pressing a log in button, Josh asks Tyler once more –

“Dude, are you ready to know your future?” he tries to make his voice as mysterious as fortunetellers do.

“Always!”

Josh finally presses “Start”.

And the laptop dies at once with a short sound.

A black screen doesn’t predict anything but troubles and cash expenditure.

Josh grabs his phone and calls Tyler, who is about to laugh as he picks up.

They decide to wait until the morning and try to turn the dead device on again.

But, fortunately, the laptop is alive when Josh boots it up again.

The icon disappeared as if he didn’t install anything yesterday. Same wallpapers, familiar icons of Skype, browsers and games – nothing strange. No glitches. He thinks he’s lucky. Moreover, his anti-virus informs him that there’re no threats detected in the system. Tyler’s happy especially because they can continue playing and they successfully forget about this like about one of these failed experiments with an unpredictable stuff from the internet.

***

A few days later they’re on Skype again, talking about the last episode of the TV-show they’ve just watched. Tyler has a theory that somebody who has lived for more than a year in a zombie apocalypse is probably dreaming of a simple snack like a sandwich he’s making right now. He’s exactly in the middle of his explanation when he cuts himself with a knife – it just slips out of Tyler’s hand, leaving a gash in his skin. Tyler gasps and runs out of the room with his finger in his mouth, trying to suck blood out. Josh can’t see anything but an empty kitchen and a cutting board with ingredients on it. Couple minutes later, Tyler returns with a band-aid on his forefinger.

“Hurts?” Josh inquires carefully.

Tyler waves it away then finally bites his sandwich. Josh hopes the blood didn’t drop on it.

***

“Damn!” Tyler cusses while they’re playing the pixel game where players need to beat zombies and get out of a shopping mall*. Tyler’s hero in a blue janitor uniform dies with a horrible sound and Josh pauses the game. He can res him later. In his earbuds, Josh hears the rustling sounds; Tyler stops spitting curses only when Josh asks him –

“What happened?” he minimizes the game window and sees Tyler’s boxers with a big wet spot on them. Josh blushes and looks away as fast as he can.

“I-I damn, tell me that you don’t see me now,” Tyler jumps away to change his clothes as Josh can guess.

“Sorry,” Josh doesn’t like to lie, especially to Tyler.

“I've just spilled hot tea all over myself.”

“Oh… Did you burn your?...” Josh’s too ashamed to ask.

“Burn my crotch? No, fortunately. But I burned my inner thigh and it hurts too.”

“If you wore pants it wouldn’t be so painful you know,” Josh hears the clothes rustling and trying not to imagine how funny Tyler looks jumping around the room, trying to change his underwear without sitting down.

“Oh, shut up,” he smirks in response to Josh’s remark, appearing in front of the camera again. Josh opens the game, ready to continue.

“You got eaten, by the way,” he adds quietly.

“Fucking zombies!”

***

Two days later, they don’t have much time to talk because it’s Friday and Josh has a dinner with his family. He’s sitting at the table in the dining room and talking to his brother when the phone vibration in his pocket interrupts them.

Tyler: does it suit me?

There’s a photo, added to the message. Tyler is standing in front of the mirror in his old basketball shirt, which has been lying in a wardrobe since a high school time. He's also wearing leggings with a space print and the shirt is barely covering his hips. His pose is super expressive — Tyler’s flaunting his ass so diligently — Josh is about to laugh when he’s typing a response.

Josh: wow, u look amazing, but these leggings are terrible (nice legs man)

Tyler: why??? i take your advice not to wear only underpants at home (thnx)

Josh: i was wrong. wear what u want. for god’s sake

Tyler: good to hear. ok, i’m going to take them off right now then

Josh: gl

Josh doesn’t have any new messages for nearly ten minutes when Tyler sends him a photo of an abrasion on his elbow.

Tyler: fell, pulling those damn leggings off. u were right – they suck.

Josh: it’s better sitting while taking your clothes off.

Ty: thnx dad.

Josh easily imagines Tyler rolling his eyes.

***

When Josh sees him again during their conversation on Sunday he discerns scrapes on his knees, when Tyler pulls them to his chest to get more comfortable.

“Tyler, when did you get them?” he points his forefinger on the damaged skin.

Tyler frowns —
“Oh, fell, slipped this morning on my way home.”

“Shit, it must be painful,” Josh’s twiddling the cup in his hands, thinking Tyler has had too many injuries in a week.

“Rather ashamed actually. It was so uncouthly…  And I tore my jeans on the knees. Looks cool. Wanna try them on?”

Josh laughs —

“Maybe.”

***

Tyler’s loud moan is the first sound Josh hears when the long beeps stop. Josh didn’t understand what kind of moan it was. He thinks it’s better to hang up but then Tyler wheezes out —

“Hey.”

“I’m… Should I call you later?” Josh scratches his chin lazily, looking around his workplace.

“No, I just was sleeping and…”

“Alone?”

Josh needs to know this out of pure curiosity. He doesn’t care if Tyler has someone in his bed. He looks like he doesn’t care, actually. But their relationship is a friendship mixed with ambiguous hints, stolen glances and gay jokes.  

“I’m not sure. Man, I’ve fallen off the bed for the first time in my life. It was as if somebody pushed me off. Urgh… And now my head is going to blow up.”

Tyler’s bed creaks; Josh can imagine him wrapping himself into a blanket again.

“Did you fall on your head?”

Tyler’s like a walking disaster. He has worried Josh too many times recently.

“Yeah…”

“Fuck. It’s better to stay in bed then. I can come to you after my shift and bring some pills.”

“It would be great, man. Thanks,” Tyler’s voice is so deep and quiet. Josh wants to take off at a run to him right now but utters instead –

“See you later buddy.”

“Uhm.”

He waits till the evening, then drops by a drug store and buys a first aid kit; exactly like the one he has at home. His mother collected it for Josh when he started to live alone and it includes everything that can help in case of common domestic injuries and illnesses.

When Josh sees Tyler in a doorway, he wishes to grab him and never let him hurt himself again, maybe with a help of a straitjacket or even a hamster ball. Tyler looks so sleepy in this old stretched shirt, red faded socks and with these unhealthy black circles under his eyes. Josh notices the yellowish stains of almost healed bruises and grazes on Tyler's knees. But he still remembers how Tyler got them. Too many fallings for a few days.

Josh enters the living room as Tyler lays down on the couch and closes his eyes, finally feeling a relief, being in the most comfortable pose.

“Hey, man, how’s it going?” Josh puts his bag on the table, coming closer.

“Fucked.”

“Did you have a bump? Or a bruise?” Josh takes a glance at Tyler’s messy hair trying to find an answer.

“I dunno. I’m afraid to touch it actually.”

“Crap, Tyler,” Josh goes to the bathroom to wash his hands before touching Tyler’s head. He should help him recognize the injury. That’s what the best friends do.

“I’m not a pro but let me see. I’ll be gentle,” Josh whispers not to harm Tyler more by loud intonations.

“Okay,” he easily agrees, as if he’s been waiting for Josh who can do this instead of him.

As Josh sits down on the couch Tyler puts his head down on his lap. Firstly, Josh carefully touches Tyler’s forehead, starting his examination. Tyler tries not to groan when Josh touches a bad lump on the back of his head; he turns to his left side so Josh can have a clearer look now.

“Well?” Tyler squeezes Josh’s knee unknowingly.

“Just a lump. There’s nothing to worry about,” Josh summarizes after a pause.

“Cool.”

Tyler always hides his fears or worries but it’s notable anyway and this is so childish and cute at the same time.

“Do you… Do you have problems with your vision? Doubled maybe?”

“Blurred a little but now it’s okay. And no, I haven’t gotten any memory or balance problems. Josh, I've read more than ten articles about symptoms of concussion.”

But Josh continues his questioning to make sure —

“Dizziness?”

“Nope.”

“Did you vomit?”

“Josh, you aren’t my mom,” Tyler gets angry.

“I’m just taking care of you, I wanna be sure what you aren’t in danger.” 

It looks like Tyler’s embarrassed; he shuts up and waits for the next question but the mood is gone. Josh always does something wrong. Instead of helping Tyler, he torments him with all these questions. He feels awkward and mutters in attempt to do something to avoid the uncomfortable silence –

“I-I’ll bring you a pill,” he is about to stand up when Tyler’s voice makes him stop.

“No!.. I mean… Stay like that. Please. I feel better,” Tyler will never admit he likes to lay on Josh’s lap. Moreover, he'll never mention he was scared in the morning when he has found on Google he may going blind for forever due to a blow in the head. But Josh understands him better than Tyler can imagine. He stays still and he’s sleepy too so he leans back and closes his eyes.

Fortunately, when Tyler wakes up, neither specialist nor emergency help is necessary. Just an Advil. His head still hurts but this ache can't be compared with the terrible pain he felt yesterday.

***

They’re playing MOBA game when Tyler’s hero unexpectedly freezes near the second tower on the top lane; Josh hears a clatter, as if Tyler runs out of the room.

“Are you okay?” Josh shouts but Tyler’s headphones block his voice. Josh hears gurgling vomiting sounds and stops farming, goes back to the base for buying suitable items. He acts automatically, every game he follows the same steps to level up his champion, make him stronger and win. Tyler’s sudden ailment makes Josh concerned. The rest of their team starts to curse Tyler in the chat.

Leavers suck but toxic teammates are worse.

They have a promo today so it’s an important match. They’ve already won two times and can't give up now.

“I-I’m here. Fuck, it was terrible. I’ve almost vomited all my insides. Awful.”

It’s good to hear Tyler’s coming back, Josh relaxes when he hears his voice again. Mid game starts and it’s time to group up.

“Damn, I told you so. Seems like a concussion,” Josh heaves out a sigh. “You better not be playing for a while.”

“Hey! I must have eaten something. That’s all. Now let’s win Josh, okay?”

They’re a good premade. They have a cool synergy and the highest win rate this season. They’ve been striving for it for a few months of gaming and even the tens of noobs didn’t stop them. So the nausea won’t break their plans too. But Tyler has to run to the toilet every fifteen minutes and this is more annoying than they’ve expected so after a couple of Tyler’s marathons to the bathroom and back Josh suggests —

“Dude, take a trash can.”

“Which one?”

Retching has made Tyler’s voice hoarse. 

“Which is near your bed. You use it for dirty tissues after your everyday masturbation.”

Tyler is pale because of the nausea and now he blushes due to such embarrassing fact about his private life. Anyway, Josh hears and sees Tyler going to his bed and taking the bin. 

“Don’t drop it, be careful,” Josh sneers. Sometimes he thinks he knows Tyler better than Tyler knows himself.

“I don’t give a shit already,” Tyler puts the trashcan down.

“Oh, if I were you I would be more careful with words like “I don’t give a shit”, Josh laughs.

“Hey! Shut up. No screenshots or videos when I’ll use it, okay?” he slumps into his chair.

“Man, I’m your best friend. Of course, I’ll never do something like this! Seriously, I even know all your underwear and can predict which boxers you wear basing on the day of the week... But I’ve never told anybody about it!” Josh gets a double kill. Their team isn’t so behind anymore.

“Thank you… And which ones do I wear today then?”

“Hm…” Josh bites his bottom lip, thinking up, “Ethnic printed? Red?”

“Oh, you’re right. Wow,” Tyler is surprised.

“I told you so,” Josh laughs.

Tyler vomits two more times during the game but they win anyway.

Josh’s happy but concerned.

Tyler’s happy but devastated.

***

A drop of blood is almost black in the dull light of the lamp. Josh sees it run down from Tyler’s right nostril to his upper lip. Tyler doesn’t understand something is wrong until Josh notes —

“Hey, man, you have a nosebleed,” he starts carefully, pointing on the screen because they are on Skype again.

“What?..” Tyler touches his face. His fingers are painted red and he looks at Josh to find a support.

“Dude, don’t worry. It happens sometimes; I had nosebleeds very often when I was a teen. It’ll stop soon.”

But it seems like blood starts to run down faster in despite of his words.

“I haven’t had any single nosebleed ever, Josh! What if… What if I’m d-dying?” it sounds stupid, but Tyler’s frightened. He’s trying to pinch his nose by his fingers but he does it with not enough force so it doesn't help. His fingers are stained with blood and of course, this view doesn’t help him calm down.

“You’re definitely not dying. Listen. You have to sit up and tip your head slightly forward. No, don’t tilt it back. Yeah. Cool,” Josh guides him and Tyler follows his instructions but both of them are nervous. It’s hard for Josh to collect his thoughts and Tyler barely avoids panic boiling inside him. “Now, can you apply something cold to it?”

Tyler runs to the kitchen and Josh hears a slam of the refrigerator’s door. He arrives with a pack of frozen vegetables wrapped in the towel and Josh can be surprised that Tyler has something like this in his fridge but now it isn’t the main thing.

Tyler winces but applies it to his face anyway and sits like Josh said, trying to breathe through the mouth and be as calm as he can. 

“Time the ten minutes. Don’t check if the bleeding has stopped, wait. Okay?”

Tyler nods. He pinches his nose with his thumb and forefinger shut. He almost doesn’t move as if it scares him shitless. He’s never been afraid of blood but this injury horrifies him for some reason.

Time hangs heavy and Josh informs Tyler about every passing minute.

When the ten minutes are over, Tyler carefully unclenches his fingers and looks at the screen where he can see himself.

He slightly smiles because it seems like the bleeding stopped, he looks creepy with his blood-stained face and this grin but Josh doesn’t care because the feeling of relief fills him. But when Tyler opens his mouth to say something, two more scarlet drops fall on his once white shirt.  Josh’s worried glance meets Tyler’s eyes and after a sec, Josh jumps up and grabs his keys from the shelf.

“Hey, keep calm; I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

Tyler’s fingers start trembling and he becomes pale. It’s enough for Josh to push an accelerator into the carpets on his way to Tyler’s house.

***

He is still in his home pants and an old stretched shirt but he understands it only when he’s knocking on the so familiar door.

In reality, Tyler looks even paler than Josh’s laptop showed a few minutes ago. He suddenly thinks Tyler’s fingers must be numb due to pinching his nose for so long. He closes the door by himself and goes to Tyler, who’s already sat on the chair in the nearest room.

“Did you check it again?” Josh enters the small but handy kitchen.

“N-nope, and, Josh, my ears are plugged. Can you speak louder?” Tyler nasalizes.

It can be dangerous if the nosebleed hasn’t stopped yet; Josh clearly understands Tyler’s simply afraid to check it alone.

“Okay. Let me see then,” he drops to his knees near the chair and carefully takes Tyler's hand off his face.

The caked blood covers his nostrils and upper lip. Josh cups Tyler's face with his hands and peers into it for a minute; he finally breathes out a sigh of relief, putting his hands down on Tyler’s bare thighs.

“It's over, you can relax,” Josh stands up, friendly hitting Tyler’s shoulder.

“Really? Oh, can you give me a wet towel?” Tyler points his finger on the wall near the window.

“Sure,” Josh goes to the sink then turns the water on. “Honestly, I even was going to suggest you to use a tampax to… You know, deal with all of this blood but everything’s okay and I’m happy.”

The blood’s dropped even on Tyler’s underwear. Josh tears his eyes away from these dark red stains.

“Is it because you always feel awkward buying it?” Tyler sniffles, wincing.

“One nil, okay,” Josh laughs. It’s strange but he feels like he lives here for some reason, but at the same time it’s a little bit uncomfortable. Maybe they use Skype too often.

“I’ve never had so many injuries in my whole life as I had in these two weeks,” Tyler grumbles, washing the dried blood off his face. “It seems like somebody cursed me.”

This night Josh stays in Tyler’s house. They’re trying to entertain themselves by movies and not to think about Tyler’s bad luck. They fall asleep in uncomfortable poses right in the living room.

Josh’s body doesn’t thank him in the morning but he has no regrets though.

***

Two days later, he suddenly stops in the middle of the street on his way home after the shift. A crazy thought about a possible reason of Tyler’s failures caught him off guard.

He turns his laptop on when he's home. The incident with that strange program from the dark web was the only one unusual thing that’s happened to Tyler in these two weeks. Josh scanned the laptop for malware but what if some part of the program is still there and this worm, virus or whatever is the reason of Tyler's mishaps? It's a weird idea but he's spending two hours or so, checking tons of folders. Finally, he finds out the hidden files in the system. This night will be long but he’ll check this program again to be sure it isn't dangerous. For his OS at least. So he makes a cup of coffee and sits down at the table with the strong desire to sort this program out.

He is still logged in as Tyler and there’re no images or videos but Tyler’s list of injuries. Cut. Burn. Bruise. Upset stomach. Every injury with description and time since Tyler's registration. Including his nosebleed — date, place, symptoms, effects and even treatment and rehabilitation process — everything is here, described in terrifying details. Moreover, Josh catches the last one injury on the list – a broken arm. This is bit different – there’s no data, no description. It’s easy to guess it’s Tyler’s future. Josh tries to log out but there’re no way to do it, which means it can be a cornerstone of this program’s functioning.

He hopes he won’t be late with the news about the danger that follows his friend. If Tyler is already in the hospital, Josh will never forgive himself. On the other hand, there’s no description of the injury in the program so they still have a chance to avoid it.

Josh understands the severity of injuries increases every day and at the same time the more terrible it is the more time passes between it and the next one. It looks like the program scoffs, giving a user – or a victim – time to feel a full gamut of pain and fear.

The melody of incoming call makes Josh flinch. It’s Tyler. Fortunately, Josh isn’t that kind of person who will lie about such thing for entertainment. His speech is slurred a little but Tyler understands he’s in danger and it’s better to see everything by his own.

***

Josh’s watching Tyler’s face changing while he’s reading pixel letters, a story about his injuries and pain. Tyler believes him. Now he’s frightened for real. The uncomfortable, nervous atmosphere fills the room and both of them try to be as careful as they can, searching for the way to avoid fracture.

After a few hours of ineffective attempts to find a way out of the situation, Tyler starts to grumble because Josh follows him everywhere even when Tyler's going to make a sandwich and take a drink.

“I can't live like this Josh!” he exclaims, trying not to be so dramatic. He falls down onto the couch and grabs his phone.

“What do you mean?” Josh stops in the center of the living room with a plate and two cans of Redbull.

“I mean, this isn’t a life; we’re afraid I might break my arm any second. Now. Or right now. Fuck…” he breathes hardly, leans back.

“I think I can hack that program, give me some time. I guess I’ll find out some information about it from the users; you aren't the first one, we'll go through all of this shit,” Josh gives Tyler his drink and takes his laptop to continue his investigation.

Tyler is sitting near him, watching TV and throwing glances at Josh from time to time.

And maybe because he’s bored he suddenly stands up at some moment, and declares –

“I’m going to take a shower. Will you… go with me?” Tyler avoids an eye contact, when Josh looks up at him. It seems like he hints at something. He stands in front of Josh in his striped underwear and suggests taking a shower together. Josh even notices a fade of blush on Tyler’s cheeks and neck. And no, that can't be the truth. But he nods anyway.

“Of course. Wait a sec, I’ll save my progress.”

They don’t look at each other and is obvious that atmosphere in the room changes again. Josh isn’t used to Tyler’s habit of not wearing any pants at home. It might be the reason of this clumsiness between them. Because staring at your friend’s ass when he leans forward to take his socks off is rude. But he does. Tyler doesn’t notice or doesn’t mind.

They enter the small room with a coral tile and bath of the standard size, separated from the rest of the room with a simple white shower curtain.

Josh climbs on the washing machine and he’s going to shut his eyes to let Tyler take his not numerous clothes off but Tyler just steps into the bath and closes the curtain.

“Um… Tyler? Do you always take a shower in your underwear? I know, sometimes you don’t change your pants for a few days but this…” Josh starts in bewilderment.

“W-what? I mean, stripping in front of you is a little bit embarrassing,” Tyler giggles nervously, standing in a cold bath and Josh even can see his silhouette through the shower curtain.

“Yeah, but how are you?...” he doesn’t have time to finish his question because Tyler’s hand appears almost in front of his face from behind the curtain, holding a t-shirt. Tyler throws it into a laundry basket without looking and Josh quietly curses when Tyler repeats these actions with his boxers. Keeping the track of the underwear’s flying trajectory Josh understands that now Tyler’s absolutely naked; they’re in the same room; he stands under the streams of water flowing down his naked body and this makes Josh feel more than uncomfortable – he gets a hard-on now.

“Amazing,” he murmurs.

Tyler starts to purr some song and Josh wants to join and wrap his arms around Tyler's waist, feel his wet body, be the reason why his singing would stop.

But it doesn't happen.

Prediction, described in the program, happens instead.

The cacophony of noises fills the room up. The sound of the sliding, then Tyler’s yelp during his fall, and a painful groan in the end. There is something else, a weird cracking noise; Josh can identify it as a bone breaking sound even if he has never heard it before.  He throws himself to Tyler, who lies on his side, presses his twisted in a weird angle wrist to his chest. All Josh sees in his eyes is fear mixed up with pain — Josh's hoped he'd never get this glance from Tyler. He turns water off then carefully touches him.

“Fuck-fuck-fuck! For God’s sake that’s so fucking hurt!” he bites his lips, shivering in a kind of hysteria. Josh tries to help him stand up, he’s afraid to look at the broken arm.

“Hey-hey man, come on, let’s go. Hold it,” Josh helps Tyler get out of the bath and now he stands on the fluffy carpet, the water flows down to his feet and the leftover of the shower gel is still on his shoulders. Josh wraps him into the biggest towel that he can find in the room and runs for the clothes. 

“Shit, it’ll be difficult,” Tyler notes, when Josh appears in a doorway. He is relatively calm; he is still shivering but trying to stand still and breathe evenly.

“Don’t worry I’ll be careful,” Josh reassures him, squatting down and helping Tyler put on his boxers and then joggers.

“What else can happen with me? What can be worse? I mean I… Damn,” Tyler shuts his eyes. Josh almost can feel how the flash of destroying pain runs through his own arm. 

“Everything’s gonna be alright,” Josh soothes him but he hardly believes his own words. It’s a cliché, it's not gonna be alright, the damn program can kill Tyler. He throws a hoodie over Tyler’s shoulder not to bother the broken arm again and leads him out of the house.

He helps Tyler sit down as comfortable as possible in the car and buckles him up. Tyler groans quietly, his lips wobble. Josh thinks Tyler holds on just brilliant. He tries to avoid holes on the road and not to think that it’s his fault.

***

At the hospital, Josh doesn't step away from Tyler. A doctor gives him sedatives to take them later while Tyler’s taking painkillers. They’re in a large room with pastel pink walls. A middle-aged traumatologist is reading Tyler's X-ray.

“It's a closed radius fracture. Nothing special. Honestly, a broken wrist is a very common injury,” the doctor looks at them over his glasses indifferently.

“This fact doesn't relieve the pain,“ Tyler replies tiredly, picking at the seams of his joggers. They were in a hurry so he has his pants on inside out.

“Painkillers will work soon and…“the doctor looks at Josh, whose leg starts nervously shaking, tapping a random rhythm. “And, please, take your pills too, as I recommended, but if you aren’t going to drive. They may cause drowsiness.”

Josh throws a concerned look at Tyler. He squeezes a little pill bottle in the pocket of his jeans.

Tyler looks better and calmer when they’re in the car again, because painkillers did their job. His forearm is hidden under the cast. A cast tape is the same color as Josh’s hair - it’s blue and it would be cute if they really cared about something so unimportant. The doctor told Tyler to come back in two weeks.

“I was worried about you,” Josh focuses on the road. He’s so tired — physically and mentally.

“I…know. You’re very caring. Thank you,” Tyler turns to the window, cradling his injured hand. Josh’s guilt is going to kill him.

At home, Tyler goes straight to the living room without a word and rolls his pants down his legs, using his left hand and jumping all over the room in attempt to free himself out of the clothes. It seems so awkward and dangerous — Josh thinks if Tyler breaks something else tonight, he’ll kill himself. It’ll be more than he can withstand.

But, fortunately, Tyler successfully throws his pants somewhere without a glance and falls down onto the couch, spreading his legs lazily.

“Fuck this shit. How for god’s sake I’ll jerk off?” it sounds hopeless; Tyler leans back, trying to relax. “Or playing guitar? And, damn, everything we’ve done in this gaming season was for nothing.”

Josh sits down near him, uttering –

“Yeah, your trash can in the bedroom is going to be empty for a while…”

Tyler grins bitterly in response.

“But I can help.”

“How are you going to play for both of us?” Tyler waves it off lazily.

“What? No, I mean, I can help with another problem,” Josh hints.

Tyler’s glancing at him for a long few seconds, making Josh regret his weird offer.

 “But you aren’t able to play guitar,” Tyler carefully starts.

Josh suspects Tyler’s mocking him but he continues his clarifying patiently –

“With another one, Tyler.”

There’s no way back. 

“Oh,” it seems he finally understands what kind of help Josh suggests.

“A-and?” Josh’s hands start trembling a little – maybe it would be better to take his pills first. Tyler might be so blunt sometimes.

“Em… Yeah. I mean, okay. It’ll be… Nice. Probably,” Tyler looks down on his groin. “Let’s do it.”

“Right now?”

“Why not?” Tyler shrugs, his voice is hoarse and Josh feels like the room shrinks. They’re face to face now. So close. Josh swallows hard.

“Okay then…” he puts his hand on Tyler's thigh, feeling tensed up muscles. Josh’s hand goes down to Tyler’s knee.

Tyler's nervous, Josh almost panics. Both of them can only try not to show it and look confident. They’re sitting across from each other, forehead to forehead, and Josh feels Tyler’s breath on his lips. Both of his hands are in close proximity to Tyler’s boner, on his inner thighs and Josh feels the heat of Tyler’s skin.

“What about kissing?” his fingers get under Tyler’s boxers, petting his sensitive scrotum.

“Why not?” Tyler’s voice’s trembling a little. It’s enough for Josh to let himself grab Tyler by his ass and knock him down on the couch, make him lean on the armrest.

“Nice,” Josh whispers into Tyler’s slightly opened mouth, sitting between his legs, then sinks into the kiss, feeling the taste of medicine on Tyler’s lips and tongue. Tyler’s fear is defeated by Josh’s care, Josh’s nervousness is defeated by Tyler’s desire and that’s enough to forget about everything that happened today.

The contrast of a fully clothed Josh and an almost fully naked Tyler doesn’t matter. It’s only the act of one-sided masturbation and Josh’s tugging Tyler’s boxers down, propping himself with his left hand not to bother Tyler’s fracture. The pose is uncomfortable but Tyler’s so desirous and hot — Josh tolerates this inconvenience for him. He spits on his palm and touches Tyler, who moans hushfully, closing his eyes; he gets harder after a few first frictions. It’s something new for Josh – he’s trying to jerk him off like he's doing it at home, wherever his conscience allows him. Nothing special, just movements up and down but he likes to feel Tyler relax, he starts moving towards and he’s unexpectedly good at kissing. Josh enjoys the process even though he doesn’t get any attention to his boner.

Tyler doesn’t warn Josh, when he’s about to cum.

When Josh’s palm is so sticky, dirty and Tyler’s gulping for air under him he feels good too. But silence gets uneasier.

 “So… How was it?” Josh stands up and goes to take something what can clean these whitish stains on his palm and Tyler’s abdomen.

“Not as bad as I thought,” Tyler grins. Josh doesn’t know what to do next so he shifts from one foot to the other in the center of the room, squeezing Tyler’s joggers, because he’s too lazy to go for tissues or a towel.

Something in Tyler's glance makes Josh hug him when he stands up to steal one more kiss. And when Josh backs off Tyler gets closer, touching his crotch through his jeans. The afterthought that the leveling up their relationship after the day like this it’s a bad idea appears in Josh’s head but he can't stop this madness. Not now at least.

Tyler pushes him to the bedroom, slowly, step by step. And when he sits down and looks up at Josh, his eyes are covered by desire and at the same time blurred by an effect of painkillers. Josh realizes Tyler isn’t ready for that and maybe he would regret about their intimacy later. Moreover, Josh can't manage how he’ll fuck his friend who has broken his wrist a couple of hours ago because of the computer program. Josh leans to Tyler, enjoying the way he kisses and touches him. But when Tyler lays on the pillows and Josh is on the verge of losing his ability to stop he carefully backs off –

“Not today, sorry.”

When Josh stops, Tyler looks at him, perplexed. He's hard again. He looks like he wants to be touched, kissed, fucked. But Josh can’t do it.

“I'd like to, honestly but... Damn.”

“But not today, I understood,” Tyler isn't so miserable to beg. “Don't make excuses please,” he’s trying to lie down as comfortable as he can with the plaster cast.

Josh helps him, grabbing the nearest pillow and putting Tyler’s hand on it. It will take some time until he’ll get used to live with this thing on his hand.

Tyler thanks Josh, who pats his chest and stands up to exit the room in a rush.

He locks himself in the bathroom; he doesn’t even turn the lights on, leaning on the door and unzipping his jeans. Josh's mouth is opened in a soundless moan when his hand slips down his boxers, starts to move up and down. It still smells like Tyler's cum and this is dirty and vulgar but Josh likes it. When he’s shivering and coming with his thoughts about Tyler, who is barely breathing under him he accidentally turns the lights on, when his ass hits the switcher. Josh sees the mess around him — the shower curtain on the floor, colorful bottles with shower gels and shampoo scattered over the bath. Tyler threw it all when he was trying to stop his falling. Josh feels the guilt filling him up again, destroying and burning inside him. He’s so pathetic, he has just jerked off in Tyler’s bathroom where his friend has broken his arm. Pleasure disappears in a second, leaving only a destroying shame. Josh thinks it’d be nice to buy Tyler a new shower curtain. He quickly washes his hands and gets out of the terrible room where everything reminds him of the incessant horror that becomes Tyler’s routine.

He returns to the kitchen where he’s left his laptop. A chill can of Red Bull waits for him in a fridge.

A half an hour later, he clearly understands there’s no chance to stop all of this shit without any consequences.

After more than two hours of unsuccessful attempts to hack the program and delete Tyler’s data he almost decides to pay some swindler one hundred and thirty five bucks for the information, then he finds the data of the previous user of this program almost by accident. This guy escaped a risk of dying using the dark web for this. It’s easy to find his IP in the database of the program and even his Facebook profile but Josh doesn't think he was hiding at all. He’s a teenager from Cardiff so Josh sends him a message and starts waiting, hoping they have time for this. He finally allows himself to take a breather — he gulps down his pills and soon falls asleep right on the table, with his head on his arms.

***

Josh wakes up to a deafening sound; he turns his head and sees a furious Tyler.

“I can't even make a cup of… Anything! My left hand’s so useless,” he hisses, stooping down to pick up the pieces of the broken cup.

“Hey, let me help,” Josh goes to the countertop to make tea or coffee and maybe something easy for breakfast.

“You know,” Tyler doesn’t raise his head, still sitting on the floor and collecting ceramic pieces. “I remember what happened yesterday and… Thanks. I know we both wanted more but... Honestly, I think I wasn’t ready for this. And not ready now. Thanks for controlling yourself,” Tyler stands up slowly.

“You’re welcome. Let me know if you need my help again.”

Tyler nods. They have gotten closer but they aren't a couple. It's a new feeling for both of them.

“You’re a good kisser by the way, I didn’t even expect you’ve got potential,” Josh giggles, searching for teaspoons.

“Oh, shut up,” Tyler gives him a light push.

Suddenly there’s a short sound of incoming message. Josh runs to his laptop — he finally has a chance to understand what’s going on and how to stop this nightmare. He explains to Tyler what he’s found last night, looking through the message on the screen. Answers aren’t so reassuring. But they exist and it’s better than sitting and waiting until something worse than fracture appears in the program.

“Okay…” Josh begins, taking a gulp of coffee, “Firstly, we should hurry because my suggestions about the regularity are true. Injuries become worse. And, as I see, the next one is…” Josh opens the program. “Oh. it’s a migraine, Tyler.”

“No way!” Tyler is about to howl.

“I think it’s gonna hurt. More painful than you felt yesterday.”

“Oh, great! Damn, if I had only known what my future holds I'd have insisted on our sex yesterday,” Tyler’s nervously squeezing the cup in his good hand. “I think I feel it. It always starts with the light pain here,” he puts the mug with a hot liquid to his right temple.

“And… How’s it?”

“Warm.”

“Do you feel better then?”

“Nah,” he goes to the long-suffering couch, lays down on it.

Josh follows him with the laptop, continuing —

“Tyler, it can't happen so soon… You must be wrong. I hope so,” he adds, sitting down and letting Tyler lean on him. “Don’t faint, you’ve got potential, remember?” 

“Did this dude explain how he got rid of this shit?” Tyler babbles.

“Yeah-yeah, wait a sec,” Josh scrolls the message. “It seems like you should… We should transmit this thing to someone.”

“Transmit?”

“Like a VHS tape in “The Ring” you know.”

“The Ring?” I haven’t watched it.”

“Me too, but I read the book.”

 “You’re such a nerd.”

Tyler’s laughing hoarsely.

“Also that guy was the first one who used the Internet for this. Actually, we can use anything; we can even download it on the computer in a local library. The most important thing is that when somebody will log in you’ll be free. For some reason this program can't hold two logged in users,” Josh scratches the stubble on his chin.

“But we don’t have time to sit here and wait until someone else will download this program from the dark web or this damn Blurryface will update it.”

“You’re right. Fuck, why did I get into that?” Josh bites his lips trying not to panic but he sees Tyler become paler and wince more and more often.

“But… Fortunately, I don’t have to fuck anyone to transmit it to them, at least**,” Tyler giggles, massaging his temple to relieve the throbbing pain.

Josh appreciates Tyler's efforts to look brave and support him but suddenly he sees how Tyler weakens – it gets harder for him to turn his thoughts into phrases. The migraine attack is near, the threat is almost visible like the first wave of the storm can be seen from the shore for an attentive looker. Josh hopes they have some suitable pills like sumatriptan but he’s not sure if it’ll help.

Anyway, he brings one to Tyler with a glass of water. The quiet “thanks” is all Tyler is able to give in response.

Josh closes curtains in the room. The darkness, quietness and warmth can relieve a migraine pain. Tyler told him about this when they met. It was an awkward acquaintance. Josh remembers seeing Tyler for the first time in his life — he was swaying and trying not to vomit in the middle of the street. As he said later, he had left the audience right in the middle of the lecture because of a headache — it wasn’t his first bout, but nobody had believed him, professor had advised him to have coffee so Tyler went out and was taking his way to the campus when Josh met him and led Tyler to his room. People were staring at them as if Tyler had gotten drunk early in the morning and Josh was cursing everyone who was throwing disapproving glances on them.

Josh helped him then and he’ll help him now.

“We’re gonna deal with it I promise,” he covers Tyler with a thin blanket.

Tyler wants to say something but fails. These sounds remind Josh how they have tried the Speech Jammer. Sometimes people misplace the letters and words when they have a migraine and mumble with no sense. Now it seems like Tyler is passing out.

“Tyler?” Josh carefully shakes his shoulder. But there is no reaction. Drops of sweat appear on Tyler’s forehead. His temperature is rising.

Josh grabs his laptop; thoughts are rushing in his head, creating a chaos. Should he call an ambulance? Or run to the nearest appliance shop to install this program on as many devices as he can until he gets caught? He’s trembling as a neurotic but he must stop the panic because he’s the only one who can help Tyler.

He dives into the sea of his own restless thoughts, internet links, meaningless messages and fake accounts in the dark web, trying to find a decision.

And he finds it. At last. It’s so obvious he is almost ashamed because he hasn’t thought about it before.

***

He stands still in Tyler’s bedroom pressing the Enter key on Tyler’s laptop and praying for success. Josh doesn’t know how much time the program is going to take to stop Tyler’s torture after fulfilling requirements.

After a few endless minutes, Josh hears rustling sounds from the living room and tears his eyes away from the dot on the screen, jumps up, runs to Tyler, hoping he's okay now.

Josh sees his silhouette even in the dark room. Tyler’s legs are tangled in the crumpled up blanket, he’s trying to stand up but fails and stays sitting.

“Josh, I’m…”

Josh stumbles on his way to Tyler so he finds himself near the couch even faster than he thought.

“Are you okay?” he successfully avoids falling, then crouches down near Tyler.

“How did you?...”

“Not now, please," he cops out, but Tyler nods in agreement —

“Okay…” he mumbles, disoriented.

“How is your head?” Josh touches Tyler’s wet forehead.

“Honestly, I don’t know. The pain is… It’s washed away, so…”

 “What hurts more: your head or your wrist?”

“Wrist.”

“Oh… Well…” he adds after a sec, “I suppose we still can play then. Just…We’ll use one computer and you’ll be responsible for skills, and I’ll choose a direction.”

“But I will choose a champion.”

“Okay. Will you sit on my lap?”

Tyler laughs, finally getting himself free out of the blanket.

In the bedroom, the screen of Tyler’s laptop glows informing about a new logged in user of the program created by Blurryface. The already familiar form is filled up with —

Joshua William Dun

06/18/1988.