Archive of Our Own ^beta

Shiro sprinted, feeling like each footstep may be his last because if his world ends, he may as well end with it. His breathing quickened and the worry was another factor that made his lungs ache. His lines along his prosthetic hand were glowing and he was ready for anything, any guard to jump out at him or to tear through metal walls.

Then, he heard it. Shallow breathing, the soft gasping of breath seemed to echo through the walls of the Galra facility. Shiro knew that sound anywhere and he should be ready but nothing prepared him for the sight waiting for him.

His jaw went slack and his body felt like doing the same. He'd seen so much carnage and brutality before this but it still hurt him deeply. He felt like he had been punched in the gut but this time, it only produced anxiety that flowed from his stomach, drowning his lungs and filling his brain. He sprinted toward Lance, who lay on the floor, almost motionless.

"Lance, stay with me. Lance, please stay with me, please," Shiro begged. His knees crashed into the floor but it was the least of his worries, considering that the love of his life was lying wounded in front of him. He gingerly lifted the almost limp body and placed it on his lap. Lance was barely breathing. Blood dripped from the wound at his forehead and also out the side of his nose into his mouth. His eyelids fluttered and hazy brown eyes stared at Shiro.

Lance's hand covered the incision at his abdomen, made by a Galra's too-quick blade that sliced as fast as it had gleamed red in the light after taking it's hit on him. He removed a hand that tried to stop the blood from flowing and patted Shiro's cheek weakly. His fingertips barely grazing Shiro's cheekbones, staining them red. He'd usually been able to turn them red without even touching him.

"Shi-", Lance croaked, trying to call Shiro for what may be the last time but he couldn't finish.

"Hey, I'm here. It's gonna be okay, trust me." Shiro held Lance's cheek softly.

Shiro could only his world so tight in his arms but his world was about to be sucked into a black hole. His heart seemed to beat worries and it felt it was only pumping a hundred possibilities to his head. All he wanted to do was to stop the world from spinning for a second so he could just focus not on the future but every single last second he could possibly have with Lance.

The rust-like scent of blood hung in the murky air and filled every crevice of Shiro's head. He didn't even know how he was breathing anymore. Shiro softly dragged his thumb over Lance's cheek, as if caressing a precious jewel. The only sounds were shallow breathing and the heartbeats. Each beat a pulsating rhythm to what may be the end.

Lance's eyelids were getting heavier by the second. Just having Shiro here felt like a dream and it seemed like everything now was a dream. But now, everything was dissolving away from his eyes, fading into the abyss. It was like sinking deeper and deeper and deeper into nothingness.

—————

He had always been Lance's hero, right from the very start when Lance signed up to join the Galaxy Garrison. Takashi Shirogane, the poster boy for the Galaxy Garrison, stared at him from the poster pasted on the blue walls of his room. Lance stared longingly at those iridescent grey eyes and imagined them gazing lovingly into his. Sure, his love of space was one thing but the bigger reason he wanted to go to the Galaxy Garrison was that he could meet Shiro.

And so he did make it into the Galaxy Garrison. Stories were told about the Galaxy Garrison's Golden Boy and Shiro turned out to not just be legendary on the outside, but his heart was apparently made up of pure gold too. Lance felt as though he had not just fallen for a face in a picture but hearing what people had to say about Shiro, made him fall even harder in love.

But just as Lance started, Shiro was leaving on the Kerberos Mission, the most important space mission of the century. Sure, he'll come back and when he does, I'll be the top cadet, waiting to congratulate him on the advancement of the human race in space discovery.

But then came the failure of the Kerberos Mission, with the pilot of the mission presumed dead. Lance felt as though someone put a needle in his heart and with each beat, it ruptured a little more. The entire Garrison mourned the loss of their Golden Boy and the Golden Boy of his heart. He remembered himself being unable to face the world that day, as tears streamed down his cheeks harder than the rain pouring outside.

Things looked up for him though, as the only thing that could have continued to make him push on was that if there was any chance that Shiro was somewhere alive in space, Lance would be the one to be able to save him once he was able to pass and go into space. That was it. That was his motivation.

Then, the Shiro returned in a ship and Lance went as fast as he could to save his hero. Together with Keith, Pidge, and Hunk, they somehow formed Voltron with the heavy task of defending the universe. And the rest was history. The first time they had officially met was in a desolate little desert shack in the middle of nowhere. Lance could feel his palm sweating as he watched as Shiro raised his bionic hand toward him. He hesitated for a second before taking it because for one, he was actually shaking Shiro's hand and two, Shiro was alive.

The handshake was warm and firm, and the shape of Shiro's hand would be forever imprinted on Lance's. Lance's heart was still set on Shiro and honestly, he could not believe that he could be doing something this amazing with none other than his hero. As the leader, Shiro was mostly fair and would do anything for his team.

Maybe it was the way Shiro had saved his life when he had protected him from Sendak. Shiro had gingerly lowered Lance's head before defending the both of them. When Lance awoke and in the few days after, Shiro had checked on him a lot more than usual and also, a lot more than the rest when they had been injured. Lance owed him his life and it was not just about making it up to him, no, it was rather to show how he may have really felt.

And then, came the nickname 'Sharpshooter'. It was just to see Shiro being proud of Lance that made his heart burst as that feeling was better than anything else. At that point, Lance couldn't help himself any longer and he confessed. He confessed that he loved him since he set his eyes on him from the poster and through the Garrison and it had been the heaviest secret he had been carrying up till now.

At first, Shiro didn't say anything until they had gotten to the castleship and Lance was worried because he knew that what he had said was wrong. There was absolutely no reason for Shiro to reciprocate his love.  And yet, he did. Their love was most definitely made it work and Lance honestly couldn't ask for more.

Then, the dawn of today came. It was a simple mission of collecting intel from an almost deserted outpost. Shiro had planned the mission just for them to get some alone time. It was as simple as that, right?

Except that they had gotten it wrong when they had thought that the Galra facility had been the main outpost of that area and it was filled with activity.

"Shiro, I love you and trust your judgment, but maybe this isn't a good idea, you know?" Lance looked up at Shiro. They were both looking down from the ceiling vent at the Galra officers and guards patrolling below.

"I know, but I think we can do this. We've taken on more before and besides, this is just intel we're collecting. And when this is over, we'll finally get some together, okay?" Shiro laid his hand on top of Lance's between them.

"Sure," Lance replied with a small smile to encourage them both. Shiro nodded before leaning closer to Lance. Tenderly, he placed his lips on Lance's forehead and gave him a kiss on his forehead. This had almost become a pre-mission ritual between them. It still had made the blood rush to Lance's ears and his smile to grow wider.

—————

"Shiro, at least drink something," Keith urged.

Somehow, Shiro had managed to call the rest of the team. They came and rescued them immediately but Shiro wasn't sure if it was immediate enough. He had grown numb, his face had become solid rock, possibly even carved out of marble, and even his fingertips were tingly.

Somehow, they ended up back at the castleship and Lance was placed inside a cryopod.

Somehow, Shiro had stood in the corner facing the cryopod Lance was in.

"I'm fine, Keith."

"That's what you said a few hours ago. Shiro,

"But it's my fault, Keith. I was the one that planned the mission. It's all my fault."

"Shiro, don't be so hard on yourself. No one knew that there was going to be activity at the facility. You did what you thought was best and you saved Lance. There's no point in worrying because all we can do now is wait." Keith sighed, knowing at this moment, no one was getting through to Shiro.

He patted Shiro on his shoulder, "You know where to find me if you need to talk."

Other members of the team popped by to check on him but none of them could make him move, not an inch.

Shiro sighed and walked slowly toward Lance's cryopod. He stared at the bruised but serene face inside. Carefully, he placed his prosthetic hand on the cryopod and leaned his head against it. In a time, his hand would be against Lance's and his forehead against his.

"I'm sorry, Lance. This is all my fault. You're like this because of me," Shiro whispered. Tears trickled down on the side of his face and he closed his eyes, trying to stop the tears from flowing.

Shiro stood there for what felt like an infinity before opening his eyes and looking up. His glazed eyes zoomed out from Lance to his own reflection.

He looked as though he had been in a storm. His hair stood up in spikes and his eyes and nose were red. The red camouflaging the scar across his face.

His fingertips traced the side of the cryopod. The more he thought about it, the worse he felt. As the storm inside grew stronger, so did his tears. They ran faster than a tsunami down his cheeks and trickled down the paladin armor, that had already been stained with blood - Lance's blood.

His mouth twisted into a grimace and he ended up curled against Lance's cryopod. His legs were pulled tightly to his chest as he tried to pull himself together. Ugly sobs escaped from him as he leaned his head back against the wall of the cryopod.

He might as well go all out on his meltdown since there wasn’t anyone around anymore and he didn’t have to hold it in any longer.

Time seemed to slow down, minutes seem to meld to seconds. Shiro's head turned toward the high ceiling, staring at the blue-tinted lights from above. A finger-tip in the cryopod twitched, signaling the opening of the screen.

As if coming out of a dream, a voice called out to Shiro from the depths of his reality.

"Shiro?"

Shiro turned around and watched as his world re-emerge.