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Chapter Text

“Good work everyone,” Amilyn Holdo said from atop her conductor’s podium. “See you bright and early tomorrow.”

Chatter and the creaking of chairs as people leaned over to grab their sheet music filled the room. Rey stood up, taking the chance to stretch her legs after the long hours of rehearsal.

“I’m ready for a drink!” Rose said loudly from the viola section, earning a chorus of chuckles.

I need a hot bath Rey thought, rolling her shoulders, trying to work the tension out of them. She’d been playing with the orchestra for months, but she still had yet to figure out how to keep her back from cramping after hours and hours of rehearsal. It was wonderful to be able to practice for that long, Rey never had the time in Jakku. Between scrapping for Plutt for cash and studying, she only had her hour in the practice rooms at the university and the weekends she spent playing in the park for quarters. She was thankful for the opportunity, but maybe the Chandrila Philharmonic could fund a fieldtrip to a massage parlor.

“Oh! Before you all leave!” Holdo announced suddenly, hopping back onto her podium and sifting through her papers, her dyed curls bouncing around her shoulders. “Can I see Rose, Finn, and Rey?

Rey froze. For what? She caught Rose’s eye who look just as bewildered. Rey laid her cello down against her chair and stepped forward through the other musicians hurrying to get home. Holdo motioned them over to the front of the violin section.

To Ben Solo.

The Concertmaster of the Chandrila Philharmonic Orchestra was brilliant. A talented musician and skilled leader, like Alphas tended to be. However, he also happened to be the biggest asshole in the entire city.

Most of the orchestra gave him a wide berth, as he was known to blow up at anyone for the tiniest things. Broke your bow strings? Have fun asking Solo for a new one. Having trouble tuning before a rehearsal? Be prepared to have him stare at you the entire time, tapping his foot and complaining how much precious time you were wasting. Going to miss a rehearsal? Better go grovel before the mighty Ben Solo and get chewed out about dedication to the artform.

Talented… but intense.

He seemed rather calm right now, leaned back in his chair just to the left of the conductor’s podium, his long legs stretched out before him. His violin that cost more than all of Jakku tucked neatly in his massive arms. Even Betas took him for an Alpha right away- it was hard to think of him as anything else. He had a danger about him, even relaxed Rey was afraid he might chastise her for the way she left her cello leaning against her chair.

“Okay, so as you know the board has insisted we try to appeal to a younger cool crowd,” Holdo said, obviously not thrilled at the idea, her nose wrinkling at the horribly inadequate adjective that the older board members had used. “So, I’m putting you four in a string quartet to be our… cool.”

Finn and Rose were grinning like crazy, barely able to hold in their excitement at the assignment. Rey furrowed her brow, raising her hand as she presented her question.

“But shouldn’t the first chairs get the opportunity?” Rey asked. Sure, she’d love to work in a quartet but the only section leader between the four of them was Solo. Hux would practically burst into flames if he knew Finn got to play second violin over him.

“I did consider that but the other section leaders are um…,” Holdo held a finger to her lips trying to think of the proper words.

“They’re old and boring,” Solo said, his low voice reverberating through Rey’s chest. She hated how much she enjoyed being close to him. Her dumb Omega hormones making her want to rest her head on his lap and listen to speak all night.

Stupid dumb Alpha and his ridiculously sexy voice.

“Then why are you in it?” Rey quipped, her anger at her own body’s betrayal fueling the remark. Ben’s dark eyes snapped up to hers and she couldn’t help but let a cocky smile spread across her lips. Oh, how it must hurt to have an Omega slap his pride like that. Suddenly, he stood to his full height glaring down at her now not so cocky grin. She could see the tension in his shoulders, his scent spiking. The deep scent of sandalwood enveloped her in its warm, earthy embrace. Despite all the frustrations pointed in her direction, Rey couldn’t help but feel calmed by the pheromones wafting off the violinist. She wanted to close her eyes and bathe in the scent forever, to kiss the scent gland on his neck and savor his taste.

Whoa whoa whoa, that wasn’t a very professional thought.

“Don’t leave your instrument like that, it’ll fall,” Ben finally hissed, motioning to Rey’s cello behind her, before stepping back and planting himself behind his chair, his fingers digging into the fabric of the backing.

“Anyway, Ben will have your music tomorrow and I want you all to come ready to work,” Holdo said giving them all a quick smile before leaving the rehearsal hall headed for her office.

The rest of the orchestra had already filed out, leaving only the four of them to gather their things. Rey could feel Ben’s gaze on her back the entire time. She’d never admit it aloud, she reveled in it. An ancient part of her that was thrilled to have caught the attention of an Alpha.

An ancient part of her that she wished she could ignore.

Rey filed into the rehearsal room, the coffee cup in her hand not doing much to soothe the exhaustion in her limbs. She’d barely gotten any sleep, instead spending most of the time lying in bed watching the cool blue numbers of her alarm clock change.

Despite the mild autumn weather, it had been stifling in Rey’s apartment. She had kicked off her blankets and spread out like a child making a snow angel. Yet, sweat pricked at the back of her neck, her hair stuck to the moisture on her forehead.

She jumped out of bed, cursing the entire way to the thermostat in the living room. She cranked it down to fifty degrees, ignoring how outrageous it would make her monthly bill if she made it a habit, and slinked back off to bed.

The cool air helped, and she managed to drift off for an hour before waking again to stare at her ceiling for the rest of the night.

She yawned, taking another sip of the drink that was more sugar than coffee as she moved around the orchestra members all dragging their chairs out of their normal formation. The brass section carried theirs out into the hallway towards the smaller practice rooms, the woodwinds sitting in a circle in middle of the room their instruments still in their cases. Then she saw the four chairs arranged in the far corner where Ben Solo was already seated, tuning his violin.

Rey stood by the doorway for a moment, ignoring the chatter of the trombone players as they passed, her eyes focused on the man across the room. His large hands were delicate, his eyes closed as he brought his bow across the strings. A lock of black hair falling across his forehead.

He was rather… handsome. Rey shook her head trying to banish the thought because she knew it would lead down a treacherous mind path. She downed the rest of her coffee, tossing the cup into the trash before Hux ratted on her for bringing it into the rehearsal hall.

She crossed to the small semi-circle of chairs, setting her bag down on the chair directly opposite from Solo’s.

“Good morning,” Ben said, playing a couple of bars from the sheet music in front of him.

“Good morning,” Rey replied, shrugging her case off her shoulders and shimming out of her sweater. She listened to Ben play as she prepared her own instrument, the tune sounded very familiar.

“What song is that?” she asked, walking around his chair to peer over his shoulder at the sheet music. His scent was stronger here, earthy and warm. Rey found herself leaning in farther than she needed to, just to get another quick breath of Ben. Every instinct she had moving her hand to place it on his solid shoulder. His bow crossed the wrong string, the sharp off note echoing through the rehearsal hall.

Rey suddenly straightened up, snatching her hand back as if she’d been burned. Ben Solo doesn’t make mistakes. Ben Solo is a master of anything with strings. A perfect sight reader and a true expert in his craft.

He doesn’t fuck up.

The man in question brought his instrument to his lap, his bow dangling beside his chair. He was sweating, Rey could see the sheen on his forehead and could smell his scent spike. Perhaps he was frustrated? Or maybe even disappointed.

The woodwinds gathered in their little friendship circle had turned around at the sour note, chattering among themselves.

“I- I’m sorry,” Rey stuttered out, unsure of what else to say.

“It’s not you,” he grumbled quickly. Ben faced away from her, but she could see him start to roll his neck around trying to ease the tension that had formed there. She bit her lip, crossing to the stack of black binders beside Ben’s chair. She kneeled down picking up the one that had “Cello” written on the spine in Ben’s small tidy hand.

“Maybe I’ll take a crack at it.” She smiled up at him, trying to lighten the dark mood that had settled over the man. He glanced at her before raising his violin to his chin, once again diving into the realm of music and lost to the outside world.

Rey took her binder to her own stand, pulling off the flannel shirt she had donned at her apartment, leaving her in a navy tank top and jeans. It was cold enough outside for three layers, but not in here- especially once they started practicing for real.

She sat down, flipping through the music binder and reading the titles. There were a lot she recognized. They were all pop songs that played on the radio, no doubt the board’s secret plan to bring classical musicians into “cool” venues. She rubbed the back of her neck, her fingers mindlessly rubbing against her scent gland as she wondered if they’d be playing a lot of Ed Sheeran to newlyweds in the upcoming months.

“Rey,” Ben’s low voice rumbled in her chest. She looked up meeting his gaze. It was intense, his warm brown eyes nearly black. His hands were trembling, his jaw set in a way that told her he was gritting his teeth.

“Is something wrong, Ben?” she asked softly as not to attract any more attention from the nosy oboe players. His fingers were gripping his bow so tightly she thought he might break it. His gaze was so powerful, like an unspoken Alpha command for her to pay attention. She stared back, falling into the jet pools of his eyes, his scent making it impossible to tear herself away.

Her Omega instincts kicked into overdrive, the scent of an Alpha clouding her mind until she could only focus on one thing.

What would Ben Solo taste like? What would his bare chest feel like against her own? How would his cock feel knotting inside of her and filling her up to the brim with his cum.

Her body burned, heat pooling between her legs as the thoughts bloomed in her head and they didn’t stop there. She was hungry to know what his lips would feel like against her own, or against her swollen clit. What would her name sound like as he moaned it into her? Would his skilled musician’s hands-

“Sorry we’re late!” a frantic Rose yelled from the doorway, Finn in tow. Freed from their biology’s spell, Rey and Ben quickly adverted their gazed back to their own instruments, ignoring whatever moment had just transpired.

Red crept across Rey’s cheeks as she suddenly took a great interest in time signatures.

Ben cleared his throat, his violin strategically placed between his legs.

“Don’t make it a habit,” he said, obviously trying for his trademark scowl but failing. His mind seemingly on a different planet.

Finn and Rose grabbed their respective binders, taking the two seats between Ben and Rey. It should have felt like enough- two Betas sandwiched between them. However, the smell of sandalwood lingered in Rey’s nose and she scooted her chair backwards trying to appear that she was accommodating for her cello. Reluctantly, she spread her legs so that she could position the instrument properly. Mere moments after doing so she heard the scrape of Ben’s chair against the floor as he tried to put more air between them.

Her gaze flickered up to him, admiring how his t-shirt stretched across his chest. He was built like a true Alpha- tall and muscular. She bet he could pick her up with ease, maybe even press her against a wall and-

“Ooo I love Florence,” Finn said, peering into his music book.

“What?” Rey blinked at him, her mind foggy.

“Florence and the Machine- we have a couple of her songs in here,” Finn said tapping the edge of the binder on the stand as if to point her attention to the whole reason she was here.

“Oh. Right,” she mumbled, taking up her bow to scratch out the first few notes of Shake It Out.

“Yeah, we’re gonna get so many cool points for playing songs that are nearly a decade old,” Rose said, raising an eyebrow as she thumbed through the selection.

“Less chatting. Turn to page 15,” Ben’s voice was a low rumble, one that demanded obedience. They all flipped through their books and readied their instruments. Rey took in a deep breath and dove into the music, trying to lose herself in it.

It went horribly. No one said it out loud but they were terrible. Sight reading shouldn’t have been terribly hard for four professional musicians employed at a prestigious orchestra, but evidently it was. Rey had a hard time focusing, missing nearly every other note in an attempt to keep up with Ben who was flying through every measure as if he could speed up time if he tried hard enough. Rose and Finn had no chance of keeping up and stumbled their way through it and, like Rey, occasionally hit the right note but only out of dumb luck.

The woodwinds kept glancing over at them, seemingly worried about the noise pollution they were creating. A few members of the brass section kept poking their heads in through the door as if to discover that- yes it was Ben Solo and his string quartet making the offending scratching ruckus.

At every break, Rey reached down for her water bottle downing it and having to run to the water fountain to refill it at least three times. Her hair, which had started down at the beginning of their session, was thrown into three quick buns. Her skin glistened with sweat after an hour and she was starting to feel a little light headed.

“Are you alright?” Rose whispered. “You look a little pale.”

“I’m fine,” Rey said through gritted teeth, raising her bow again. She chanced a glance towards Ben, his features set in concentration, his dark hair glued to his forehead. She could see his fingertips pressing too roughly into the fingerboard, his bow slashing across the instrument as if he were slitting someone’s throat instead of playing a pop ballad.

“How are my cool kids doing?” Holdo asked walking over, a painfully fake smile glued to her face. Rey leaned her forehead against the scroll of her cello, afraid to face the conductor. That was Ben’s job anyway, however, Rose beat him to the punch.

“Awful.” She said, slouching back into her chair, arms crossed in front of her.

“Yeah, well, I could hear that from my office,” she said, relieved she could drop the fake smile in the face of honesty. She stepped in closer to the center of their semicircle, whispering so that the clarinets trying to eavesdrop wouldn’t hear her. “What is up with you guys?”

“Bad day I guess,” Finn mumbled, frowning at his music. He was obviously disappointed in himself. Hux would most likely be on his ass the second he left rehearsal earning him a speech about dishonoring the second violins with his cut rate work. D’acy probably wouldn’t even say anything to Rey, but she’d see it in the older woman’s eyes. The three of them were so young and promising it would be detrimental to all of their young careers to bomb like this.

Rey wiped her forehead with the back of her hand. Her fingers were cramping from twitching around her fingerboard all morning, her mind still trying to focus through the fog of Ben’s scent.

“Is it too warm in here?” Holdo asked, taking in Rey’s sweaty exhausted body.

“It’s not the room, it’s us,” Ben rumbled, his jaw set and his forearms resting on his knees. “Amilyn, I think it’s time to call it a day.”

Holdo frowned at him before setting her watchful gaze on the rest of them.

“We all have hard days. I expect all of you to come in early tomorrow and play until you get it right. Understood?”

“Yes ma’am,” Rey, Finn, and Rose said in unison. Holdo gave them a nod before walking towards the flutes that had been inching closer by the second, straining to overhear.

“Shit,” Finn said under his breath, holding his head in his hands. Rose was already packing her viola away, no doubt thinking about which bar to hit and hit hard.

“Be here, tuned and ready to play, at five thirty,” Ben said, his voice detached and stern, slamming his music binder closed.

“In the morning?” Finn whined.

“Five. Thirty.” They all knew that tone. The growl of an Alpha that is on the edge of being pushed too hard. The trio made quick work of gathering their things. Rey quickly slipped into her discarded layers, throwing her binder into her backpack. They huddled together as they performed their walk of shame across the rehearsal hall as if they might save them from the scorn of the bassoons.

“Want to go to Maz’s?” Rose asked as they shuffled into the hallway. Rey had been right, Rose had been contemplating bars.

“Rose, it’s two in the afternoon,” Rey said, her exhausted form struggling under the weight of her cello. Her sleepless night was catching up to her forcing her to sag against the wall to keep her feet underneath her.

“They sell fries,” she said, looking just as pitiful as Rey felt.

“Actually, that sounds great,” Finn said.

“Great, let’s get some disappointment fries,” Rey said, pushing off the wall in preparation for the long walk to her car.

“Rey?” the low voice sent a bolt of energy through her body. She felt her heart flutter in her chest and heat grow at the base of her spine. Certainly, a strong reaction for a single word. Then again Omegas did everything rather strongly.

She peered over her shoulder to where Ben stood in the doorway, case in hand with his music binder under his arm. His hair a nest of messy curls spilling over his ears. His scent wrapping around her like a warm embrace all over again despite her only leaving it a few minutes prior.

“Hm?” she mumbled, unable to form an actual word.

“Can I talk to you?” he said, his eyes focused on her for a few moments before shifting to Finn and Rose. “Alone. In my office.”

Rey looked over in time to see Rose shoot her a quizzical glance.

“Uh, sure. Of course.” She wasn’t entirely sure what Solo wanted to talk to her about. Sure, they had a stink day, but that was as much his fault as it was hers.

“See you at Maz’s,” Rose said quickly before grabbing Finn by the arm and dragging him towards the exit. Knowing Rose, she was already formulating ten different reasons that Solo had called Rey to talk to him. She was looking forward to hearing them later.

“Follow me,” Ben mumbled before moving past her, leading Rey down the hallway.

“I know I was terrible today,” Rey blurted out, jogging behind him to keep up with his long strides. “We were all kind of garbage. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I don’t usually do this. You know- I’ve been here for months.”

The fresh worry of termination loomed in her mind. She was the newest member of the orchestra, an easy string to cut. They turned a corner, passing various offices before arriving at a door with a small bronze plaque beside it reading Ben Solo – Concertmaster.

He fumbled with a key, opening the door for her to enter first. His office was organized, but for a collection of papers scattered across his oak desk. Every wall was lined with bookshelves holding volumes and volumes of music, a small window set in the wall covered with a deep black curtain. A couch was under the window, piled with pillows and a few blankets. Did he sleep here occasionally? It would explain why the moment she stepped inside she was immediately overwhelmed by the scent of sandalwood and something else- something deep and distinctly male. No distinctly Alpha. Her legs quivered as the smell enveloped her, her cheeks already flushed at the ideas skating across her head.

“Mr. Solo,” she said, slightly intoxicated on his scent. She thought using a professional title might make up for the very not professional fantasies she was having. Her body burned for his touch, her scent glands sore and desperate for him to run his tongue across them. She turned around, an apology already on her lips. “I’m sorry, I’ll be better-”

“Rey, we have a much more urgent matter to deal with.” Solo crossed to his desk depositing his instrument and binder there before leaning on the edge of it, his fingers wrapped around the trim with white knuckle force.

“Which is?”

Ben cleared his throat.

“You’re in heat,” he said, his grip on the trim growing tighter. Rey shook her head, there was no way she could be in heat. She took powerful suppressants- the strongest ones they’d give to an Omega her size. She’d only had one before in her teens spent alone before deciding she wasn’t going to deal with that on a regular basis. “Rather you’re about to be, I can smell it.”

Rey stood in shock. She was in no way prepared to deal with a heat right now. She hadn’t bought groceries in a week and a half and laundry even longer. She didn’t have a mate to see her through it- she didn’t even have any toys stashed in her drawers.

“Oh no,” she said, the realization of her next week falling on her like a brick.

“That’s not all,” he said through clenched teeth, his grip on the trim of his desk growing tighter.

“What else?” she asked, worried what the news might be.

“If I don’t fuck you right now I might lose my mind.”

Chapter Text

Rey wasn’t sure how long she’d been holding her breath. A long silence had settled between them, crackling in the air. Ben’s hands were still holding onto the desk as if it were his last anchor to life, his dark eyes pinning her in place. A voice rooted in the deepest part of her mind rejoiced- an Alpha was here to see her through a heat. A large one, at that, one she already knew and who had already proved himself a bold, commanding force.

She swallowed hard, trying to ignore the slick pooling between her legs thoroughly soaking her underwear. Rey finally took in a shaky breath, only to be bombarded by Ben’s scent. The woman had never felt like this before. Her suppressants were fool proof. Sure, she’d think an Alpha smelled nice every now and then, but this was something completely different. This was her body responding to an ancient calling, a hard-wired code in her biology screaming at her to mate. Specifically, to mate the man before her.

Rey shut her eyes, as if blinding herself to Ben Solo’s muscled frame would calm the storm brewing within her. Hormones clouded her mind and she pushed them away reaching for rational thought. She was the first Omega to play in the Chandrila Philharmonic, the first one to play in any orchestra worth its salt in the state. She’d only been with them a few months and to immediately trigger a rut in the concertmaster would look terrible. Would they even want her around if she was going to flaunt her scent around triggering any Alpha she was in close quarters with?

She had fought tooth and nail against that very idea. She had never once halted her suppressants to make time for a heat- something that wasn’t exactly healthy for an Omega. They suggested having at the very least one heat a year, Rey hadn’t had one since she first presented in high school. To give into her most basic urges would give up everything she had worked for. Rey made it her on her own merits and years of arduous work, fucking Ben would be…

Mind numbly wonderful.

She slammed her back against the bookcase, sucking in more of the delicious scent of sandalwood. There was something else there- a softer scent. The smell of soil right before a thunderstorm. The calm in the air before violence. It made her limbs heavy as that deep, ancient voice crooned to her.

Alpha is here to take care you, let Alpha help you.

She felt hot breath against her throat. Rey snapped her eyes open to see Ben caging her body in against the shelves. A hand gripped the binders beside her head, his mouth inches from her throat, his full lips trembling. Her pulse skyrocketed, her knees clenched together as her panties were rendered useless by her own biology flooding her cunt in preparation for the delicious pleasure of taking Ben’s knot.

His scent was as strong as ever, choking out every other thought in her mind. Rey watched the muscles in his shoulders move beneath his dark t-shirt, amazed that such a person could even exist. Alphas only looked like this in porn videos, and yet here he was all thick muscle and towering height, hunched around her body to suck in more of her scent.

That was the worst part- he was perfect and he wanted her.

“Omega,” his deep voice whispered before his lips made landfall on the base of her throat. Rey gasped, her hands flying up to his chest to grip at the fabric over his pecs. Heat flushed her entire body as the word slipped from his lips. Rey didn’t realize how desperate she was for this, for an Alpha to simply call her what she is- an Omega. It made her knees weak and she slumped against him, letting Ben press her body into the bookshelf. His teeth grazed her skin, his tongue flicking out to lick her scent gland sending electricity through her body, leaving her toes tingling with the aftershock.

She wanted to linger in that moment forever, his body spread over hers protectively, his lips dancing over her skin. Her body sang under his touch like the strings of his violin, each caress of skin hitting the perfect note deep within her.

But there was more to this than biology.

“No,” she whispered softly, the word painful to say aloud. Rey untangled her fingers from his shirt, pushing against his chest. Ben’s body tensed, every muscle rigid as the unfamiliar word slipped between them. Omegas don’t say no to Alphas, especially ones about to go into heat. He removed his lips from her throat, looking up at her hazel eyes.

“What?” his voice was hoarse as he strained to control himself. He moved a step back as if her weak shove against his torso had truly pressed him away. However, she could see in the tension of his jaw there was a waterfall of emotions and desire being held at bay.

“I can’t,” Rey said, her body screaming at her telling her to worship her Alpha, to get his lips back on her skin. To apologize and let him take care of her, however as much as she wanted that she knew what she had to do. A knot would make her feel incredible, but she couldn’t sacrifice everything for it, right? “Not like this.”

Ben stood there for a moment, his body an inch away but still refusing to free her completely. He cleared his throat, a vein in his neck poking up against the skin.

“Do you have someone to help you?” he asked, the words passing through his lips as if they were wrapped in barbed wire, each syllable tearing at his tongue as they emerged.

Rey shook her head before piping out a soft, “No.”

“Rey- that’s dangerous. I can’t let you go home without someone to watch over you,” he voice was low and gruff, his Alpha instincts in full gear. The tension in his body had transformed into something else. Worry creased his features and the hand gripping the book case beside her head inched closer as if he was going to caress her face but stopped himself. The overwhelming need to care for and soothe fighting with the code of conduct of the orchestra that Ben no doubt helped write. Rey bit down on her lower lip hard enough to draw blood.

“I can take care of myself,” she breathed, trying to will her body to move to the door. She could easily slip under Ben’s arm and leave, but her feet were glued to the carpet. Ben huffed at her words, his face moving in closer, his lips hovering over her throat.

“Let me take care of you, Omega,” he whispered. Ben could have easily used an Alpha command, but he didn’t. His voice was a soft- a plea. His hand finally coming to rest on her chin, a thumb swiping across her the wound she had just gnawed into her bottom lip. “Please.”

Was Ben Solo begging?

“But- ah,” Rey began to protest when a cramp rolled through her body. It was over quickly, just a taste of what was to come in the next few hours when her heat truly started. Ben’s arms were wrapped around her before the wave was even over. He lifted her up with one hand under her knees, the other around her shoulders. He carried her bridal style, and Rey resisted the urge to bury her face in the scent gland on his throat. He leaned down, carefully setting her onto the couch piled with soft pillows. Ben crouched on the floor beside her, a hand stretched out over her waist as if physical unable to leave her side. Can’t leave your Omega open to attack after all. However, as Rey scoffed at the behavior, her body savored it. The weight of his arm resting on her hips was comforting, her fingers suddenly curling around his wrist to keep him in place. “Ben, I-”

“Shhhh,” his free hand brushed Rey’s hair behind her ear, the touch of his fingertips on her forehead sending an electric shock through her body. “It’s okay, I’m here for you.”

It was at that moment that Rey thought about how ridiculous it sounded for Ben Solo of all people to say that. Concertmaster Ben Solo, scowling at everyone during every rehearsal. Always short with everyone, even the conductor. A man whom Rey had never seen join friends for drinks after a performance, a man who always packed up his instrument alone and went to his office to finish work well after everyone was gone. He was kneeling beside her, shushing her worries away and arranging the blankets and pillows of his couch around her like a nest. Ben Solo who had a personal vendetta against anyone who dared see past the crusty exterior he had built.

Hormones can sure do a number on someone.

“Ben,” she said softly. He looked up at her, dark eyes searching for permission. His hands may be busy arranging a nest but the veins popping out of his forearms told her he was still biting back the things he really wanted to say. Rey may have a few more hours until her heat took over, but it seemed that Ben Solo was already thrust into the middle of a rut. The amount of control it would take to stop such a thing would be astounding. At the thought Rey felt even safer in his presence, as if she was safe from not only the world but her Alpha himself- a claim not all Omegas can make. “Ben, you’re my boss- I can’t-”

“Is that it?” he asked, his eyes suddenly hyper focused on her own.

“What?” Rey said, shivering under the intensity of his gaze.

“Is that why you said no?”

“Well, yeah.”

“Is that the only reason?”

Rey bit her lip. She had been talking herself down from a ledge for what felt like hours. She knew there were other factors to consider, but her heat was coming, and Ben was… well he was right there! She cleared her throat, returning Ben’s gaze.

“Yes.”

He was on top of the couch, a knee between her legs and a hand on either side of her head. He was so big. For a man who played such delicate music he was massive, more suited to wrestling than the violin. Ben leaned down into her, laying a kiss on the shell of her ear.

“Let me help you,” he groaned. She felt something hard press into her thigh and gasped when she realized it was Ben. Her gasp twisted into a moan, her hips rising to grind against his.

“Yes, Alpha,” she moaned.

It was as if the strings holding Ben in place snapped. He descended on her immediately, his lips roaming from her lips to her jaw, then down to her throat. His hands ripped her shirt up, exploring the skin beneath it. A large, calloused hand palmed her breast through her bra, his hips pressing her into the couch. His scent spiked, filling Rey’s mind with sandalwood and rain.

“God, you are so beautiful,” Ben groaned, licking at her collarbone. Rey felt blood flush her cheeks. She knew it was probably his rut speaking, but the idea of cool, cruel Ben Solo thinking she was beautiful sent a shiver of excitement through her body straight to the ends of her toes. Rey’s back bowed off the couch as Ben pushed her shirt up to her neck. He reached under her, long fingers fumbling around for the clasp of her bra. When he couldn’t find it immediately, he grunted, grabbing the brassiere in the middle between her breasts and ripping it off her body as it were made of rice paper and not wire and lace.

“You’re paying for that,” Rey said, trying to reprimand him but barely having the energy to speak at all. He grinned down at her before attacking her exposed breasts. Ben’s sucked a perk pink mound into his warm mouth. Rey gasped, grabbing a handful of dark locks as he worked at her nipple, sucking and biting at the tender skin. She wiggled under him, moaning for more- for him.

He drew his tongue up her chest, across her collarbone to the side of her neck where her scent gland throbbed. He licked the delicate skin before nibbling at it, teasing the delicious pain of the bite they both wanted. Rey had never even considered the idea of mating someone before but in the moment with her mind blurred with pure pleasure it echoed through her hazy mind. She could just imagine his teeth breaking the skin and claiming her. The thought made her moan out load and Ben quickly responded, grunting into her skin as he worked the skin of her gland even more.

Rey squirmed, her hands tugging on her jeans. She managed to undo the button before Ben’s hands were brushing hers away. He yanked the zipper down before working the fabric down over her hips, leaving them bunched up on her thighs. He kissed her stomach just below the navel, before traveling down. He pulled her soaked panties aside, exposing her wet cunt. Rey squealed as Ben’s hands pinched the smooth skin of her thighs, pushing them open to see her. He stared for a moment before dipping two fingers between her folds. Rey shivered at the decadent contact and whimpered as he quickly pulled away. Half closed eyes watched him between her legs, as he brought his hand up, examining the slickness on his fingers. His eyes met hers, dark dangerous eyes that completely enveloped her. The scent of a rain swept over her, her abused nipples hardening to tight peaks. He brought his fingers to his lips and grinned at her before licking the juices from his hands. Rey blushed, her cunt flooding at the pictured painted before her. She wanted to question him, to beg his approval, to make sure she tasted just right for her Alpha.

“God, you taste so good Rey,” he grunted, not satisfied with the sample he had on his fingers. He leaned down, pressing his tongue into her hot folds. Rey could feel his moans as he pressed further into her, and there was nothing she could do to stifle the cry that escaped her lips. She’d never been with an Alpha before, and even the Betas she’d seen were not exactly poets of the clit, but by Ben Solo was a gift. Rey stared up at the ceiling, stars bursting over her vision, her body shaking from all the sensations. If this is what it was like fucking an Alpha then she understood everything- every movie, every book about mated pairs. It was obscene and delicious and she wanted more.

Knock, knock, knock.

Rey’s eyes flashed to the office door, her breath stuck in her throat. Ben’s body was over hers in a flash, pressing low against her as if to shield her body from whatever threat had presented itself. Her cheek was pressed against his chest, and she could feel the low growl brewing there.

“Solo? Are you in there?” a voice called, a man. Rey thought she remembered it, but all the different orchestra members began to blur together after a while. However, Ben’s protective growl grew louder, reverberating through his entire chest. Rey could feel it vibrating through her own body. She huddled beneath him, hazily trying to think of what she should do.

Calm Alpha, soothe Alpha.

Rey shifted on the couch, moving her body up so that she could slip a small timid hand up. She pressed her fingers against his cheekbone, and Ben leaned into her touch, his animalistic side sated for a moment. Rey brushed her fingers through his thick, dark hair.

“Ben?” the voice called again, knocking harder on the door. Ben’s head snapped to the sound, and he launched off the couch, flying to the door. Rey quickly yanked her pants back up around her hips, basic instincts aside whoever was on the other side of that door didn’t need to see everything. She was still fumbling with her zipper when the door swung open.

A man stood in the doorway, handsome tan skin with dark curls. Rey recognized him as a member of the brass section. Rey never spent a lot of time with the horn players to really know them, but she knew this one from Finn’s post rehearsal rambling at Maz’s.

Poe Dameron.

The smell crept through the fog of her heat. A heady scent that was objectively pleasing- teakwood and leather- but felt wrong. It made her skin crawl and her mind was already desperate to get another unaltered whiff of Ben.

Headstrong and impulsive.

She could feel the tension in the air before the two before any words could be said. The room was ruled by biology, and right now an Alpha in rut had been interrupted by an outsider.

An alpha.

Chapter Text

No one moved. Rey was frozen in place, her eyes snared by Poe’s dilated pupils. He could smell her, the wetness between her legs that signaled her incoming heat. These three individuals stripped down to their biology as they all glared, muscles tensed, ready for someone to make a move.

Ben emitted a growl from deep within his chest, a noise that no one could ever call human. Poe bared his teeth in response, a vein pressing against the tan skin of his neck as his body readied itself for a fight.

Rey’s own body was protesting the absence of Ben’s warmth beside her. A part of her wanted to return to her couch, to protect her nest for when Ben returned from battle. A different section of her brain wanted them to battle it out, and see who was truly worthy of earning her heat.

The other, more human, part of her wanted all of this nonsense to stop. She shook her head trying to clear it of the heavy fog that the scent of the two Alphas had laden her mind with.

“Get out,” Ben snarled, finally finding words though anger. Poe took a step into the office, issuing a challenge.

Rey frantically glanced around the room looking for something she could shove between the two men that might keep all of them out of an incident report. She heard the slam of Ben’s hand gripping the door frame, blocking the entrance to the room.

“She’s MINE,” he growled. In a weird way it made Rey’s knees go weak. Her Omega mind swooning at a properly protective Alpha. The young woman set those thoughts aside, and finally spotted their savior sitting on a bookshelf by the window. Rey wrapped skinny fingers around the cold metal canister.

She turned to see the Alphas nearly touching noses. Ben had a height advantage, but Poe was stocky and headstrong. If things got any worse there would be some bad injuries. No one needed musicians getting into a fist fight. If it did come to fists and Concertmaster Ben Solo shattered his knuckles on Poe’s nose, well they’d both be out of a job. The thought spurred Rey forward, she had to save them from themselves. And people say Omegas can’t control their emotions.

Ignoring Poe’s distasteful invading smell, and the combined aura of danger that roll off the men in waves, Rey ran over to the door, slipping down under Ben’s arm and spraying air freshener right into their faces.

The pair broke off into coughing fights, shielding their eyes from the chemicals. Rey took the chance to shove Dameron into the hallway by his shoulder, slamming the office door and turning the lock into place.

“What the hell?” Ben coughed, his voice more controlled, more human. He rubbed at his eyes, blinking experimentally making sure he wasn’t blinded.

“I’m so sorry,” Rey said, dropping the canister and taking Ben’s face in her hands. His eyes were red, but he could keep them open. Rey had accidentally spritzed herself in the face with Febreze enough times to know it wasn’t life threatening, just a bad habit from working long hours and choosing sleep over a shower. “I didn’t know what to do- are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” he said, running a hand through his dark hair. “But we need to get out of here. Now.”

“But what about Holdo? What about rehearsal tomorrow?” Rey asked, all her responsibilities falling on her like a load of bricks.

“I’ll deal with Amilyn,” he said quickly, grabbing his coat from his office chair and swinging it on. Rey tried not to notice all the muscles in his arms as he completed the action. How’d she like to snuggle up against the expanse of his chest and listen to his heartbeat. Damn it. At this rate she was going to have to Febreze herself in the face. “She’ll understand.”

Ben threw a backpack over one shoulder and was digging his keys out of his pocket. It was all going so quickly. Rey had been pinned into the couch one moment, the next breaking up an Alpha fight, and now they were leaving to…

Oh, man she was in over her head.

“Where are we going?” she asked hesitantly. She sounded more naïve than she would have liked. Ben glance dup at her, dark brown eyes latching onto her own hazel gaze. She could see sweat on his forehead, fingers gripping his keys so tightly she thought he might bend the carabiner.

“My place? Unless you prefer your own apartment?” the words seemed forced, as if he was thinking very carefully about each syllable.

“No, your place is fine,” Rey said, her cheeks flushed. She should be gathering her things and fixing her clothes. She should be in a hurry to go to Ben’s apartment to get fucked out of her mind.

Her throat felt thick, and her heart fluttered. Her palms were slick and she ran them over the thighs of her jeans trying to dry them.

“Is that… okay?” Rey asked her eyes wandering around the room now, not wanting to land on the hunk of talented Alpha muscle before her. They had been swept up in hormones, she didn’t want to do something she’d regret. Not now, not with the boss of her dream job. Besides, just yesterday he seemed to despise her.

“Is something wrong?” he asked, voice softening.

“No, no. Not really. Well, I just- do you… do you want to do this? With me?” her words were less than eloquent, and she stumbled over her own meaning trying to get them out in a timely manner.

“Is that a trick question?” his brow furrowed. She watched a bead of sweat slide down his face. His fingers trembled, sending a melodic jingle from his keys.

“Sorry, I know we have a time limit here-”

“Yeah, kind of,” he grunted, shifting his weight again in an attempt to hide the obvious evidence of his rut forming in his jeans.

“But I don’t want you to do this because…”

“Omega.” His tone caught her attention immediately. Rey’s chin snapped up to meet his gaze. His eyes burned into her, his scent spiked filling the room with the aroma of damp soil and sandalwood. She shuddered under the intensity, cramps creeping into her core as her heat took root. She knew what would relieve that pain, she knew what she craved and he did too. “Let me help you.”

That’s all it took. Rey and Ben were out in the hallway, practically sprinting through the building to the exit door. Ben’s long legs made it hard for her to keep up, especially while lugging her cello at a sprinting pace.

“Let me,” he said, shifting the weight of the instrument off her back and carrying it in one hand. Ben swung the large metal door to the outside open, letting the rush of cool air hit their bodies. It was a delicious sensation and Rey took a step into the cool afternoon air.

“Rey?” her eyes snapped to the other end of the parking lot. Finn and Rose were sitting on the trunk of Rose’s car talking to-

Poe fucking Dameron. Honestly, she’d never even spoken with the man before and now he’s going to be everywhere today?

“Who is-,” Ben asked, coming up behind her. She felt him go rigid, his chest pressed against her back. His free arm came around to hold her across the shoulders, a very clear display of ownership.

There was going to be so much explaining to do later.

Rey wanted to savor the feeling of Ben wrapped around her, his Alpha scent sending a blush creeping down her neck. She wanted his skin on hers- but first they had to get out of the fucking parking lot.

“Sorry! Lots of work to do! Have to go!” Rey shouted, slowly moving away from the group, trying to steer her hormonal Alpha away from another confrontation. She whispered over her shoulder. “Where’s your car?”

“STAY AWAY FROM HER!” Ben shouted instead, his grip on her shoulders tightening. Rose and Finn were beyond confused, their heads tilted to the side trying to make sense of anything that was happening. “SHE’S MINE!”

“I’ll text you guys later!” Rey laughed nervously, yanking her coat close around her chest trying not to reveal that her undergarments had been torn apart and left in Solo’s office. She grabbed Ben’s wrist and yanked him towards her small sedan parked nearby having given up on finding Ben’s. The man’s eyes were still hooked into Dameron across the parking lot. Rey gently took her cello case from his hand and laid in the back seat. She slipped into the driver’s seat, blasting the AC as high up as it could go. They were so close to heaven, she could taste it. The damnable scent of a storm rolling in filled her head. She needed this, she needed Ben. The man in question had the door to passenger’s seat open, one foot in the car, the other still on the pavement. He was glaring at the Betas and Alpha over the top of her car.

Rey leaned over, whispering a very soft “Alpha.”

Ben slipped into the car, the door shut behind him, his mouth an inch away from her own.

“Yes, Omega?” the words fell from his lips easily, as if he wasn’t even thinking about it. Rey closed her eyes and took in a deep breath. If they made it to Ben’s house in time it would be a miracle.

“Directions.” Rey demanded, throwing the car in reverse. She backed out of the spot and quickly slipped through the parking lot towards the main road. Ben took a brief moment to glare through the window as they passed by where her friends and Dameron were huddled together. Rey gave a weak little wave but doubted they could focus on anything besides the murder in Solo’s eyes as he pressed himself against the window. “Ben- directions.”

“Left onto main,” he said quickly, moving from the window to nearly cross over the console into Rey’s own seat. His hand was on her thigh, fingers gripping the skin there. He nuzzled into her hair, taking in a deep breath.

“You smell fucking amazing,” he mumbled against her brown locks. Rey refused to look anywhere but the road. It was hard enough driving while in heat, she didn’t need Ben’s distractions. Well, she did need them, just not while she was driving! “I’m going to make you feel so good, Omega.”

Rey took a shaky breath, her fingers clenching the steering wheel in a death grip. Suddenly, he leaned it and she was met by the warm sensation of his lips on her neck. She gasped, stopping a little too suddenly at a red light. A cramp tore at her abdomen, twisting her insides. Even with every vent pointed at her, Rey’s skin burned even hotter. She stared up at the red light in front of her, trying to ignore how Ben’s lips felt against her scent gland. How his tongue felt as he ran it up her throat. Her fingers dug into the leather of the wheel.

The light turned green and Rey floored it.

“Right onto Orchid Dr,” Ben mumbled against her ear, his hand wandered up her thigh until his fingers hovered over her clit. Rey resisted the urge to close her eyes and lose herself in the sensation of his hands on her body. She refused to even blink, her knuckles white as they gripped the steering wheel. We can’t fuck if we’re dead in a car wreck she told herself.

Rey flicked her turn signal on and turned down the road Ben had instructed. She was thankful that the speed limit was lower as they reached a more residential part of the city.

“What’s next?” she asked, her voice coming out weak.

“You should smell like me,” Ben crooned, nuzzling his face into her neck. He licked at the tender skin on her neck, sending a shiver through her whole body. “So, no one tries to touch you like Dameron.”

The name came out on a growl, rumbling deep within his chest.

“I can’t wait!” Rey cried, slipping her car next to the curb and throwing the gear into park. She went for her seatbelt, shaking hands trying to release the buckle only for Ben’s larger ones to free her from her bondage. He leaned his entire body over the console, feet at the passenger window and his head nearly through the sunroof. He was way too big to be moving around Rey’s tiny sedan like this, but hormones don’t make exceptions.

Sandalwood filled her mind again, calming her nerves and loosening the cramps in her abdomen. Everything was going to perfect real soon, Alpha was here. Ben swooped in, sucking at her scent gland with a vicious appetite. Teeth scraped against her skin and the woman’s gasp twisted into a moan as the pain brought her body closer to her goal. To a knot.

Rey settled into the intoxicating hormones her Omega body provided, sleepily holding onto Ben as he thoroughly licked every inch of her neck and collarbone. By the time he pulled away her skin was decorated with fresh blooms of purple like wildflowers in a field. He admired his handwork, placing a kiss under her jaw and whispering a soft “mine” into the flesh there.

Ben slipped his hands underneath her, lifting her out of the driver’s seat and settling them both on the passenger’s side with Rey held firmly in his lap. Rey reveled in this new vantage point. She could feel Ben’s erection underneath her, the sheer of size of it seemed daunting but the wetness in her panties seemed to only grow as she wiggled on top of him. He groaned at the movement, latching his mouth onto her neck again, sucking on her scent gland and sending shivers of pleasure through to the tips of her toes.

“You’re a dirty little Omega, aren’t you?” Ben growled against her skin, his fingers gripping her hips closer to him. “Getting fucked on the street in the middle of the day.”

Rey could only whimper, her mind long ago deciding not to care about where they were. All she could focus on was the lips on her neck and the hardness beneath her. She grinded against Ben’s lap, desperate for his touch, for any sensation that would cool the heat boiling within her. Ben reached down, yanking up the lever on the side of the seat. They fell backwards as it reclined, hitting the backseat with a soft thud. Before Rey could appreciate her place hovering above Ben’s body, he had flipped them over. His lips never left her neck, sucking desperately on her gland like a man dying of thirst. His hips bucked against hers, and Rey sunk into the upholstery of the passenger’s seat savoring every moment being underneath his weight.

“Oh, Alpha,” she murmured, more to herself than anything. However, the soft whisper caught Ben’s attention. She could smell his scent spike, the soothing scent of sandalwood, but mixed with something sharp. Like the wick of a candle that had just been blown out.

Oh God, she was going to mate with her boss in her car on some fucking random street.

Rey caught the top of her pants and quickly wiggled out of them. There was no time to waste, not now. Not after she made up her mind. Ben attacked the freshly exposed skin, kissing and licking at the tender flesh of her hips. Her pants never even made it all the way off. Her jeans were tangled around her ankles and there was no room or time to think about fixing it. Ben yanked panties down, the poor piece of fabric was rendered useless now, drenched in the juices of her quickly impending heat. Without missing a beat, Ben leaned and down and licked her clit. Rey jumped, grabbing onto his shoulders at the unexpected sensation of his warm, wet tongue. He looked up at her, his lips wet. They locked eyes, panting in the cramped space of the passenger’s seat.

Then Ben’s pants were around his thighs, and he was against her again, his lips on her neck and his cock pressing against her opening. Rey wrapped her legs around his waist as he thrusted into her. There was no time for gentleness, not when a heat or a rut is triggered. There is only sweat and friction.

Rey’s eyes were closed, her nails digging into Ben’s back, as she tried to hang on to him. He pounded into her over and over again and she lost her words. She could feel something leave her lips- moans, soft prayers of “Alpha,” but nothing voluntarily. Her mind was in her cunt, lost to the sensation of having an Alpha rut into her.

It was like nothing else she had felt before. He was enormous and filled her completely. She felt she might shatter from his violent love, but that she would enjoy every moment of it. Rain soaked earth filled her mind, and she longed for each powerful thrust into her, and whined every time he pulled out again.

It was quick, a bumbling, desperate session necessitated by hormones. Ben’s fingers rubbed at her clit and it took a matter of minutes before she was screaming with her climax. Ben held onto her, pounding through her peak, extending the rolling sensation pleasure that passed through each cell of her body. He followed not long after, thrusting into her one more time before groaning against her skin and spilling inside of her.

Rey licked her lips, ready to feel the filling sensation of his knot blocking her up to seal in his cum, but was disappointed as he pulled out before it could happen.

She sat up, covered in sweat, every muscle in her body weak. She grabbed the handle in the door just to keep herself up right.

“What the hell?” she panted, eyebrows pulled together in a little scowl.

“That was just to buy us some time,” he said, leaning back on his knees, and adjusting his pants back onto his waist. His toned seemed calm and collected, as if he had just fucked his frustrations out. Which, Rey supposed, he had. After buttoning his slacks, he opened the passenger door, slipping and jogging over to the driver’s side.

Rey blinked. Trying to figure out what just happened. As she awkwardly wiggled her jeans back on (which was no easy task in a car, covered in sweat), she tried to remember all the steps they’d taken to get here. They’d gone to rehearsal, it went terrible, she went to Ben’s office, they made out, Poe happened…

Did she miss something?

Ben slid into the driver’s seat, stiffly yanking the seat belt across his broad chest. Rey’s keys were still in the ignition, and before she knew it they were pulling away from the curb and down the street.

Rey pulled the passenger’s seat up right, and tried to find a place in the car to look that wasn’t Ben Solo. Her heat was still pounding from having him inside of her and now she felt like she was being driven by an Uber or something. The radio was switched off, which made the whole ordeal even worse. Maybe she would have felt less weird if God is a Woman was playing. Or maybe not, that could be a hell of a lot worse.

Finally, Rey couldn’t bear to just stare at the mounds of orange and brown leaves piled up outside and abruptly turned to Ben.

“So, like, do you not want to do this, or something?” She wished she sounded less like a petulant teenager, but it was hard to think with her heat clouding her mind.

“Rey,” he pulled to a halt at a stop sign and turned to look at her. He placed a large hand on her upper thigh, his dark eyes locking with hers. His full lips, red and raw from desperate kisses, pulled into a small all-knowing smirk. “Like I said, that was to buy us some time. I’m taking you to my apartment so I can give you the fucking of your life.”

Rey blinked. Her body smoldering from his cool, Alpha tone.

“Okie dokie.” Only she wished she had said anything else.

Chapter Text

By the time Ben had pulled up to his apartment Rey was thrown into another round of cramps. Her body wanted his knot and did not appreciate being tricked like that. She bit down on her lip, trying to ride through the painful wave of cramping and heat that rolled through her body. Every muscle ached, and her skin burned. When Ben finally put the car in park and yanked the key out of the ignition she thought she might faint. She went to open the door but found Ben already opening it and reaching inside. He slipped a hand under her knees and one around her waist and lifted her out of her car like she weighed nothing at all. She would have commented on how ridiculous it was to be picked up like that, and something along the lines of “Oh wow Solo I didn’t know you lifted” but her hormones simply did not have time for such unnecessary nonsense.

Immediately she pressed her face into his shirt, letting the soothing scent of sandalwood calm the fire burning inside her. She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling herself closer to his scent gland, trying to fill her mind completely with his smell. She flicked her tongue against the flesh of his neck and he stumbled going up to the steps.

“Careful,” he growled, righting himself and running the rest of the way up to his door. Ben gently set her down to fish his keys out of his pocket. While her feet may have been on the ground, her face never left the crook of his shoulder. Straining on the tips of her toes, Rey continued to lick and suck at his scent gland, wanting more of his taste in her mouth. She could feel his muscles tense under her touch, and could taste the sweat on his skin.

“Rey,” he groaned, fighting himself. She was lost in that moment, completely occupied with his taste. It wasn’t until strong fingers gripped her wrist did she surface back to reality. She looked up at him, his teeth clenched together, the keys jingling in his trembling hands.

“Oh,” she said quietly before hiding her face in his shirt once more. She heard him jam the key into the lock and swing the door open.

A switch flipped. Ben bent down and hoisted Rey over his shoulder, a large hand gripping her ass to keep her in place over his shoulder. All she could do was grab the back of his shirt and hold on. She watched him kick the front door closed, and tried to take in the details of his apartment as she was carried through it. Her mind didn’t register much beyond the wonderful, all enveloping smell of sandalwood that seemed to radiate from every surface in it. She felt high off it, and like she may overdose any moment.

She took in a deep breath, closing her eyes and losing herself in the rocking sensation of being carried through the apartment to the bedroom. Rey was soon yanked from the peaceful bliss as she was hefted off Ben’s shoulder and landed on the mattress, sinking into the dark comforter stretched out on top of it. She blinked and stared up at Solo standing before her. The neck of his t-shirt had been stretched out, revealing the dips of his collarbone and the swell of his chest. He was impossibly tall. Rey knew he had a couple inches on her, but they were always sitting and usually quite a distance away from one another. Here, lying on his bed and staring up at his form she realized just how fucking Alpha he was. He was panting too, his fingers twitching by his sides. She found his eyes and saw them roaming her figure.

A cool shiver ran down her spine, soothing the heat that was building within her core. She wanted him to look at her, to be completely taken in by the sight of her body.

She wanted him to lose control and it be because of her.

Rey ran her tongue over her lips, her mind occupied with a single thought.

“What are you waiting for, Solo?” she said, her voice coming out as a hoarse whisper.

Then he was on her, pressing her into the blankets, his mouth desperately sucking at the flesh of her neck. Rey gasped at the sudden contact, quickly clutching to Ben’s back as every sense was bombarded once more with the feeling of him moving against her. She yanked his shirt up, pulling on the fabric until he ripped it over his head and threw it aside. Her hands hungrily spread across the expanse of his chest, feeling every hard muscle on his abdomen. His teeth sunk into the flesh of her neck, nibbling at the skin before traveling somewhere else to abuse. He moved so quickly, trying to cover every inch of her skin in kisses and bites. He came up for air, his dark eyes sparking as they met her own.

“No more clothes,” it was an order, a deep growl from his chest. Rey immediately began tugging on her sweater, yanking it over her head and freeing her torso to be attacked. Ben kissed and bit at her breast before sucking a nipple into his mouth, rolling it between his teeth. Rey gasped, wrapped her legs around his waist as the sensation of his warm, wet mouth on her skin sent her into overdrive. He moved down kissing down her stomach until he reached the top of her jeans. He growled at the fabric before yanking it off her legs to be abandoned on the bedroom floor.

Clad in only her soaked panties, Rey still felt unbearably warm. Ben hooked his fingers under the band of her underwear and quickly slipped them off. Only they didn’t join the land of unwanted clothes. He bunched them up in one hand and unabashedly held them to his face and sniffed them. His eyes held hers and Rey felt the slick dripping out of her.

“These are mine now,” he said, smirking down at her. She nodded, dumfounded by the god like body before her. He dropped down between her legs, hooking her knees over his shoulders before burying his face into her pussy. She gasped, her fingers gripping his hair as he licked every inch of her. He sucked at her clit, sending intense waves shuddering through her body. She was mumbling his name, but with each brush of his tongue it became louder and clearer until she shouting for him. She bucked her hips into his face as she came, riding out her climax while grinding on his chin.

Rey was still gasping for breath when Ben crawled over her, pressing her down into the mattress with his hips. He had removed his pants and they were both now free from their clothes. It felt freeing, being this obscene in the nude.

Ben caught her lips, hungrily slipping his tongue around her mouth. He was set on claiming every inch of her and Rey couldn’t be more thrilled.

“Take me, Solo,” she moaned as their lips parted. He grunted, grabbing her shoulders and flipping her onto her stomach. She felt him press against her entrance, stick and hard. Rey licked her lips, ready to take him in. When he thrust inside of her all the air was forced from her lungs. Despite taking him in her car only a little while earlier, she was still surprised by how large he was. Her walls pulsed around him as he sheathed himself completely inside of her.

“God, Rey,” he panted, his hands gripping her hips as he savored the feeling of being completely enveloped. “You fit me, perfectly.”

He slowly pulled out and Rey whimpered at the loss of contact until he bucked up inside of her again.

“Like you were made for me,” he said, thrusting up into her again. He was going slow, letting her adjust to his size. She didn’t want slow. She wanted fast and hard. She raised herself onto knees from her prone position, spreading her legs to allow him better access.

“Come on, Solo. Take me like an Alpha,” she demanded, her pussy dripping around his cock. He didn’t need to be told twice. No one soft words of reassurance, he was off to the races. He slammed himself into her over and over again, and each time she wanted more. Each thrust built a pressure inside of her that lifted her closer and closer to heaven. He leaned over her, his hips still ramming into her with abandon, to suck at her neck. His teeth grazed her skin before he moved to the nap of her neck, kissing it and licking it as he came closer and closer to the peak.

Rey would have let him. In that state, half blind from the pleasure of him fucking her, she would have cried for him to bite her- to claim her. He was a worthy mate. He was large and strong, and he would be good to her. Despite the fact that he was her boss and they didn’t exactly know each other beyond work, Rey would have tied herself to Ben Solo in an instant.

However, he didn’t bite her mating gland. Rey reached her peak, coming on his cock as she screamed his name, and his hips falter, shoving deep within her. His knot ballooned inside, locking him inside her walls. He shook with his climax, and he quickly moved to the side of her neck, his teeth latching onto the skin there before they had a chance to hit their intended target. They waited there for a moment, sweating and shaking as Ben pumped more of his seed inside of her.

Finally, his teeth released her neck. Rey sighed as warmth filled her womb. Ben lied them on their sides, curling around her body and nuzzling against her neck.

“You’re perfect,” the words were whispered so quietly, Rey wasn’t sure she was meant to hear them.

With a knot inside of her, and her Alpha hugging her close Rey felt the happiest she had in a decade. After years of loneliness, she felt like this was just what she needed.

She was smiling as she drifted off to sleep.

Chapter Text

The pair did not stay asleep for long. Ben’s knot slowly went down as they napped intertwined in the sheets. The fire within Rey had been satisfied, but only for half an hour at most. The tingling of the bite mark on her neck was delicious. She wiggled against the sheets, her toes clenching as hazy dreams bloomed in her mind.

When she woke up her skin was hot and her thighs soaked. The familiar sensation of cramps started up again with a vengeance but this time all Rey had to do was utter a single whimper.

Before she realized what was happening Ben Solo had shot up out of a dead sleep. He had been holding her close to him, her back flush against his chest but now he hovered over her laying kisses along her collarbone.

“It’s okay, I’m here,” he murmured into her skin. His hand slide down her body, caressing her curves. He cupped her breasts, massaging her nipples before sucking one into his mouth. The warm, wet sensation of his tongue on the sensitive skin was enough to make Rey cry. She didn’t need to be caressed and fawned over. She needed to be fucked into oblivion. Fucked until she couldn’t stand. Fucked until she couldn’t think.

Ben froze over her, his eyes meeting hers. He sensed her frustration and she didn’t know it if was from having an overly expressive face or from some deep-seated Alpha sense.

Rey noticed, in that moment with Ben posed protectively over her body, that his arms were trembling. It couldn’t possibly be from his weight, the man looked like he did push ups daily. Her eyes went back to his face and saw a bead of sweat fall down his temple.

Fucking shit, he was holding back! Now! When she needed it the most and they were finally alone. Rey threw her head back against the covers, her body on fire and her brain too exhausted to understand any of the nuances of the situation. She wanted Alpha dick and she wanted it five minutes ago.

“Solo, I thought I told you to fuck me like an Alpha!” it wasn’t even dirty talk, merely Rey verbalizing her frustrations. However, it must have hit a very ancient nerve in the man because the growl she received in reply was inhuman. He descended on her like a tiger on its prey. His teeth biting at the tender scent gland at the junction of her neck and shoulder. A moan left her lips as the sweet pain filled her mind. Her legs wrapped around his waist, wordlessly begging for his knot. She could feel his erection against her and she felt herself losing control as the Omega inside of her began to take full control.

Ben sank into her with no warning, filling her up completely in one fluid motion that halted all brain activity. She gasped, and could only stare at the ceiling as he spoke against her neck between bites.

“Is this what my little Omega wants?” he crooned before slowly pulling himself out and thrust back in again. Rey could only squeak in reply as he began moving faster, thrusting deeper and harder with each new jerk of his hips. Rey dug her fingernails into his back, hanging on for the ride as he drilled into her again and again. She clung to him, moaning his name with abandon before even a name was too much for her brain to handle. She could only gasp, her toes curling as she got closer and closer to her climax. Ben bit down on her shoulder hard enough to draw blood and it was enough to push her over the edge. Rey shattered into a million pieces as her orgasm over took her. Her walls clenched hard around him, her nails clawing divots as she screamed through the height of bliss.

He kept going, fucking her through her climax. His hips never stopped, not even for a moment, as she fell apart underneath him. The steady movement and constant presence of his teeth nipping at her collarbone as enough to make it fill like it’d never end. Wave after wave of pleasure smacked into her like the ocean wearing away rocks into sand. She thought she might truly break apart if it went on much longer. Then he paused, and the pleasure came to a head before rippling out. Rey collapsed onto the bed, limp and glassy eyed.

“You’re not done yet, little one,” Ben growled against her ear. She could feel his lips smiling against her skin.

Rey managed a weak “huh?” because he had pulled out and flipped her over onto her hands and knees. Her arms shook, and she sank down leaning on her forearms with her ass in the air.

“You want my knot?” he said, his hands gripping her ass, the head of his swollen cock pressing against her entrance again.

“Yes!” she whined into the sheets, trying to hide her the scarlet blush dominating most of her face. She was exhausted and sweaty, and wanted nothing more than to take him inside of her again. However, no matter how quiet the plea, her Alpha always hears her.

He sank in slowly, inch by inch filling her up until she had his whole length deep inside of her again. She panted, her body trembling with the delicious sensation of having her Alpha’s cock calming the fire inside of her abdomen. She had Ben Solo to take care of her heat, a proper Alpha, and it was all she could think about it. His body moving with hers, the warmth of his skin, the sweet sensation of his teeth breaking skin over her scent gland. And his smell, God his smell! Like sandalwood, leather, and sweat.

His hands gripped her hips as he set their pace. His hips slammed into hers and sent her whole body lurching forward with each thrust. He sped up, an arm wrapped around her middle to keep her place. She returned the movement, grinding down on him trying to fill herself even more than he already had. Rey closed her eyes, savoring the feeling of being absolutely sated. No beta could ever keep up a pace like this, nor fill her up like her Alpha could. She gripped the edge of the headboard to have something to hold on to as her mind chanted its mantra to the unstoppable pace of their hips.

Ben, Ben, Ben. Alpha, Alpha, Alpha.

“Oh, Alpha!” she screamed as a second orgasm shook through her already sensitive body. She shuddered, her walls clenching and unclenching around Ben’s cock as she shook from the intensity of the climax. She prepared herself for the sweet sensation of Ben’s knot growing inside of when, instead, she was met with the cold loss of him pulling out.

Any fatigue she felt before vanished as she spun around. She didn’t even give him a chance to speak before Solo was on his back and Rey was straddling his hips. Her mind was focused on a single thing, and she would get it. An Alpha would never resist giving their Omega what they truly, desperately needed.

She leaned over, pressing messy kisses along his lips and down his chest.

“I need it," she whimpered, sitting up her hands reaching beneath her and gripping Ben’s cock. It was still incredibly hard and slick from her own juices. She raised herself up, pressing the head of his cock to her entrance.

She locked eyes with Ben, is pupils blown back and his hair a sweaty mess falling across his forehead. His tongue slipped out and ran over his lips and Rey couldn’t wait a moment longer. She slowly impaled herself on his cock, slipping down bit by bit and never breaking his gaze. His hands came up, holding her hips and guiding her down on him.

Rey couldn’t suppress the moan that tore itself from her throat. Her body thrummed with pleasure, her cunt full of cock, and her Alpha’s large hands gently holding her.

However, she did not throw Ben Solo onto his back to go slowly.

Rey braced herself, her hands on Ben’s stomach, as she began rising and falling on his cock. Being in control of the pace was both amazing and frustrating work. She managed to hit the special spot inside of her with each stroke, but her exhausted body couldn’t move fast enough to truly burn away her heat.

She whimpered, her eyes shut in concentration and her cheeks flushed as she tried harder and harder to take her pleasure. She felt Ben move and when she opened her eyes he was sitting up, his face looking up into hers and his muscled arms lifting her and pushing her back down again, assisting her in her hard work.

Her eyes were caught in Ben’s. They pulled her in like a blackhole and she realized she wanted to come on his cock while staring into his eyes. Rey wrapped her arms around his neck, refusing to break their shared gaze as she bobbed up and down on cock over and over. His jaw was tense, like his teeth were being grit together, his dark gaze stayed on her.

She felt herself getting closer and closer. Ben grunted, his fingers digging deeper in the flesh of her hips. They were close, they were both so close.

“Knot me, Ben,” she gasped as she slammed down on his cock again and again. “Take me- fill me, Alpha!”

Her movements staggered as her third orgasm ripped through her body. Ben moaned, his arms wrapping around her tightly as his hips gave a final thrust up. She could feel his warm seed pumping into her, and the cramping pain that had been growing within was snuffed out. Finally, she felt the knot at the base of his cock ballooning inside of her, pressing against her walls and locking the in place. Rey could have giggle from the pure joy she felt. Instead she gave a content sigh and nuzzled against Ben’s neck, laying a kiss on his scent gland.

He combed his fingers through her hair, massaging her scalp as his knot pulsed within her.

“My sweet Omega,” he whispered into her hair. Rey smiled. If she could live in a single moment forever, this one had to be it. The heavy scent of sex was all around them, and Rey was high off of sandalwood.

She pressed her face closer into his shoulder, trying to get another lungful of his scent.

She closed her eyes, her brain hazy in a post coital mist. Her Alpha was wrapped around her, his fingers having moved down from her hair to her back where he traced designs over her spine.

Rey wanted to feel like this forever. The pure sensation of contentment was addictive in a way she never thought possible.

The rest of the day went much like the start. Rey and Ben would go at it like a couple of rabbits and then, once his knot had expanded, they’d collapse together and rest. They were at it all through the night, hungry for more of the other’s touch. It wasn’t until morning that the initial desperate calls of their heat and rut began to slowly ebb away.

When Rey woke up early afternoon sun was streaming through thin white curtains dancing in a breeze blown through the open window. She could hear birds chirping outside and occasionally a car driving down the street.

She wrapped the sheets around her shoulders, watching the tree limb outside shift in the wind.

How… normal. After yesterday Rey wondered if anything was going to feel normal again and it was nice to have a moment where she didn’t feel like she was going to vibrate out of her skin unless she got her hands on a cock.

The door to the bedroom opened, and as if in possession of some sixth sense that always told him exactly what she needed, Ben Solo came in holding a steaming mug of coffee. You know you’ve had a weird day when it’s a surprise to see your boss in clothes rather than the nude. He had a gray t shirt on and black sweatpants. His hair was wet from a shower, and a warm smirk touched his lips.

He sat on the edge of the bed, offering her the mug with Chandrila Philharmonic Orchestra printed on the side. Rey hesitated, her eyes drawn to the black and white logo of the violin. It was a reminder of the world they had to go back to. The world where things were different.

Where she was going to have explain a lot. Still, she sat up and took it, grateful for the warmth against her fingers. She took a sip. It was impossibly sweet, just how she liked it.

“How do you know how I take my coffee?” she asked, raising an eyebrow at the man.

“You made a cup of coffee at the audition in the green room. I remember because I had never seen a human being pour that many Sweet’N Low packs into anything before.”

Rey giggled and was rewarded with another one of those warm Ben Solo smiles. It sent a fluttering in her chest that made her feel like she was back in grade school.

“No, truly, it’s absolutely disgusting,” he said, his smirk still glued to his face.

“Oh, and I’m sure you take yours black,” she said, taking another sip and letting the coffee warm her tired limbs.

“You got me.”

They sat for a moment, Rey sipping her coffee and Ben looking out the window. Maybe he was thinking the same thing she had.

“It’s weird right? How normal trees are?” Rey blurted out.

“What?”

Rey’s cheeks flushed as she realized she didn’t exactly get all the thoughts out that she wanted.

“Like, how life can be so strange but then there’s moments when everything is normal? Like how yesterday was… yesterday and right now there’s coffee,” she raised the mug up, trying to use the visual to help her case but she only felt like she was failing. Still, Ben was watching her, listening to her ramble. There was something in the way he looked at her that made her core burn. He leaned in towards her and she felt slick on her thighs. Her body hungry with want but her mouth still trying to explain her thoughts from before. “Coffee and trees are normal, is what I’m saying. Not that, uh, sex isn’t-”

He leaned over her, plucking the coffee mug from her hand and setting it on the nightstand. His eyes were warm, if not a bit mischievous.

“It’s just that right now everything feels nice,” she squeaked, staring up into his eyes.

“I can make you feel even better,” his voice was so deep is seemed to rumble within her own chest. Her body was on fire, the sheets soaked in her own desire. Her mind set on Omega mode once again. “Do you want me to?”

Rey didn’t answer with words, instead she leaned in catching his lips in a kiss. He kissed her back, slowly seemingly examining every inch of her mouth. He pulled the sheet away from her naked body, and soon replaced it with his own warmth. His erection pressed against his sweatpants and Rey reveled in grinding against him, teasing him through the fabric.

He gently bit at her lip.

“Where is your patience, Miss Niima?” he growled, sitting up and throwing his t shirt off and onto the floor.

“For you? I have none,” she smiled, watching as he pulled down the waistband of his sweatpants. His cock stood at full attention, hard and ready. It made her mouth water.

Ben leaned in, kissing and nibbling at her neck. Rey moaned as his cock slid into place, the familiar sensation still taking her breath away. Ben descended on her open mouth, kissing her long and slow. Every move he made was agonizingly slow, every buck of hips, every brush of his fingertips.

Rey didn’t even try to stifle the moans that came from her. Open window be damned, Ben Solo was working her body like an instrument. Playing a slow, sweet ballad with his mouth and his hips.

When she came it wasn’t with an exhausted scream and a collapse into sweat, but instead with a small gasp and low pleasured moan.

God, what can’t this man do. He fucked her like an animal the night before, and now he had played music with her body. He had pressed each tender part of her, and gently eased the sleep from her bones with his kisses.

They had made love and it was a lot scarier.

His knot grew, and his warm seed flooded inside of her warming her core. Hips buckled for a few moments, his cock pumping more and more cum until finally he collapsed against her. He quickly rolled them onto their sides to keep from crushing her under his weight and pulled the sheet over their bodies to protect from cool breeze wafting through the window.

Rey watched him, his eyes focused as he fluffed a pillow before sliding it under her head. Was this normal Ben Solo? Coffee and warm smiles, or was the real Solo the hardass at the concert hall? She rarely ever saw him smile at work. His emotions, save for displeasure and frustration, were reserved and hidden away from the public. He was controlling and loud, like most Alphas, and ambitious to a fault.

But he was also pulling her close to his chest and nuzzling the top of her head, laying kiss after kiss on her hair. The pull to give in to her Alpha was too much. Rey laid her head against his chest, wrapping her arms around him and drifted off again into another satisfied Omega nap.

“Shower time,” Ben’s voice cut through her lazy dreams. She blinked awake in time to feel him pull away from. Rey shoved her head into the pillows, whining from the lack of contact. She didn’t want him to go away, she wanted him beside her.

She yelped as he slid his hands underneath her and lifted her out of the sheets. He crawled her body against his chest, and Rey felt another flood of emotion fall over her. She tried to hide the blush creeping across her cheeks but hiding her face against Ben’s neck but the small rumbling chuckle in his chest told her she had failed.

You can’t blame an Omega for thinking being carried away by an Alpha is titillating- that’s just unfair.

Ben carried her into the bathroom and set her down on the cold floor as he leaned into the shower and turned the water on.

Rey took the time to examine herself in the mirror. Her neck was covered in bite marks and bruises, her lips swollen and red from desperate kisses. Overall her face seemed to glow. Usually purple ringed her eyes, but now she looked well rested, her skin was clear, and she looked, well, good.

An Alpha’s cock does a girl good.

Steam filled the room and Ben ushered her over to her shower. He held her hand as she stepped in, but she refused to let it go.

“I’m going to clean up and make some lunch,” he said, his free hand closed over her death lock on his fingers. Her bottom lip pouted forward, her hazel eyes looking up at him and begging for just a moment of his time.

“Pleeeeease?” she smiled.

“I’m not falling for that,” he said. “How about this, after lunch I’ll do whatever you like.”

“Whatever?” Rey asked, millions of nasty thoughts entering her mind.

“Omega’s choice,” he said, leaning over and planting a kiss on her cheek.

He left and despite the room feeling colder without him, the stream of scalding hot water as almost a good enough replacement.

Almost.

Chapter Text

Rey stepped out of the bedroom, still running a towel over her wet hair. She’d grabbed one of Ben’s t-shirts from his dresser figuring he wouldn’t mind. Rey looked over the apartment. She’d spent the entirety of her time here in bed and she was curious to see how Ben Solo lived. It was a lot like his office: warm and a bit cluttered. It was a nice place, with warm brown bookcases along one wall and large leather couches facing a television that, by the layer of dust on it, wasn’t used often. Rey gazed at the books on the shelf, recognizing a few of the names. Mostly music related, either sheet music or historical texts about composers.

She peeked over into the kitchen where Ben slid a plate piled high with sandwiches and chips onto the kitchen island. He leaned across the counter, his lips pulled into a warm smile. It felt… domestic. A strange feeling considering their circumstances. Rey told herself it was all the hormones still wreaking havoc on her emotional state and that she shouldn’t think too much about it.

But the way he looked at her made her feel radiant.

“I’ll take that,” Ben said, reaching for her towel. She handed it over, taking a seat on a barstool, her stomach rumbling at the sight of food. He started for the bedroom and called over his shoulder. “I went to your car and got some of your stuff. Your phone was dead so I plugged it in- you should probably take a look at it.”

Rey reached over to where her phone sat near the edge of the counter. She shoved a handful of chips in her mouth as she swiped it open and nearly choked when she saw the wall of notifications waiting for her. They were mostly from Finn and Rose, both asking where she was and if she was okay. She shot off a few replies assuring them that she was alright and not to worry. She considered telling them who was she was with, but they had seen Solo leaning out of her car to snap at Poe so maybe it didn’t need to be said.

A terrible sensation of dread filled her stomach at the thought of showing up to work. Finn, Rose, and Poe knew what was going on they must have told others. If anything reached the clarinet section then everyone knew and she was screwed.

Ben reappeared from the bedroom, taking the stool beside her. His fingers settled around a cup of coffee, but he didn’t drink from it. His eyes were fixated on her.

“You need to eat,” he said, nodding to her plate.

“Hey, did you tell Holdo or anyone about this? I mean people are going to be asking why we were gone,” Rey said, fiddling with her phone.

“Holdo knows we’re both on Designation Leave and that’s all she or anyone else needs to know,” he said, finally raising his cup to his lips.

“Yeah, but what are we going to say? How are we-,” Rey cut herself off. It was a hard question to ask let alone answer and it felt wrong to put him on the spot like that.

“Don’t worry about that right now,” he said, his voice low and calm. His hand rested on her back, massaging circles between her shoulder blades. Rey felt the tension leave her shoulders. Her Alpha was here, why should she worry? She threw him a small smile before tossing her phone onto the counter and devouring her lunch.

Her phone wasn’t the only thing Ben had brought inside. Her cello case was sitting in the corner of his living room alongside his own instruments. Rey had to admit her beat up plastic case looked ratty beside actual antiques he had on display. She had slapped stickers on it over the years, mostly to cover cracks from the cheap material slamming against sidewalks and doorways. Stickers with Jakku University’s mascot Reggie the Sand Rat were wrinkled and faded against the black plastic and Rey felt her cheeks flush. After months with the orchestra she should have bought a brand-new case, but there was always something else to buy. She needed new tires last month, the one before that she had to buy concert blacks for performances. It had slipped her mind but now, with it sitting beside Solo’s maple wood and ebony instruments, she felt more self-conscious than ever. She quickly opened the case, hefting her cello out of it.

“You know we have extra cases, right?” Ben said, picking up one of the violins from its stand. It was a gorgeous instrument, and the way he held it to his chin made him like look like a renaissance painting. All hard lines and black hair. It was as if he had read her mind, that or he thought her case was so sad looking he just had to offer a replacement.

“Oh, I didn’t know.” She blushed, taking a seat in the hardbacked chair positioned beside the collection. There was only one, she guessed Ben Solo didn’t often play duets in his apartment.

“I’ll get you one tomorrow,” he said, skillful hands on the pegs twisting just enough to get the desired effect. Rey, however, nearly snapped a string at his words.

“We’re going back tomorrow?” She didn’t mean to sound so pathetic, but it was the truth. They had barely spent two days alone together and it was already back to work. Aren’t heats supposed to last longer than that? It depended on the Omega, of course, and if they had an Alpha nearby to see them through it. Heats could last anywhere from a couple days to an entire week. Before all this Rey had dreaded the thought of a week long heat, but now the idea of being cooped up with Solo for a few more days didn’t seem so bad. There was still so much to think about. She had to talk to Finn and Rose. There was probably a meeting with Holdo to be had, not to mention all the music she had to learn.

Inside these walls it was calm. It was the scent of sandalwood and coffee. Of arms wrapped around her and lips kissing her neck glands. She didn’t know what would be waiting for her outside, and she was enough of a coward to admit she didn’t want to know. Rey’s eyes flickered to the front door, her lips pulled into a frown.

There was going to be talk. The first Omega to be in the Chandrila Philharmonic and she’d managed to fuck the concertmaster in only a few months. There was going to be rumors and gossip on the forums and in the rehearsal hall. She didn’t think Holdo would fire her, she seemed like a reasonable woman, but she was certain a lot of people would want her gone.

“Hey,” Ben’s voice pulled her from her thoughts. He was kneeling beside her, a hand on her cheek. “It’s going to be okay.”

Rey nodded, attempting a smile. Ben didn’t demand much from her, he took her silent reply and flipped a music binder open.

They played the rest of the afternoon, mostly practicing their own parts in the “Cool Kid Quartet” music, but occasionally branching out with other songs they knew. Every time Rey tried to trip Ben up playing a random measure of a song, he always caught it. He seemed to know just about every single piece she could remember. Eventually, they started playing their own music. Ben’s fingers would fly rapidly across the neck of his instrument and Rey would slide her bow across her strings, meeting his melody with deeper tones, rounding out the sound.

It was wonderful.

By the time the sun had set Rey’s back was sore and her fingers cramped, but she didn’t mind. The music stopped and they looked at one another, knowing that it had to end. Rey quietly slipped into the bedroom hunting for her various clothing items. She pulled on her jeans and despite herself she kept Ben’s shirt on, throwing her sweater on over it. When she stepped out, he had put her cello away and held the case over his shoulder.

“Do you need a ride to your car?” she asked, remembering they had left Ben’s car at the music hall in the haze of hormones.

“Don’t worry about it, I’ll take an uber,” he said, his fingers fidgeting with the strap of her cello case.

There it was. That post-heat realization that the world still moved. Rey had watched enough romance movies to know it from a mile away. Try as you might, it was always awkward and, in her case, even more so.

“So, tomorrow-,” he began. Rey’s heart swelled in her chest. She didn’t want to hear him say it, so she rushed in announcing it herself.

“We’ll just pretend this didn’t happen,” her eyes fell to the floor. It shouldn’t be that hard, right? She’d known Solo for a few months so in the grand scheme of things a couple of days was nothing. Ben was silent for a moment.

“Yeah,” he said softly, his feet shuffling against the carpet. He moved towards the door and Rey followed behind, taking the chance to sneak another peek at his form.

God, she didn’t want to leave.

Ben swung the door open and started for her car. The street was quiet, the streetlamps making a soft buzzing noise above them. Rey unlocked her car, holding the backseat door open for him. Ben carefully placed her cello inside. The door slammed shut, echoing across the quiet complex. Rey’s eyes flickered around until they landed on Ben’s face. She gave him a small smile, and wasn’t sure if a hug or a handshake was proper. Why weren’t there heat etiquette books?

“Thanks,” Rey said, her fingers tangled up in her keys to keep them to herself.

“No problem.” What a casual way to talk about a rut. Rey opened the door to the driver’s seat.

“See you tomorrow.” Despite how simple and shallow the conversation was she didn’t want it to end. If she kept talking there was still a chance she could get back inside Ben’s bedroom and hide from the world.

Ben took a step forward and Rey’s heart jumped into her throat, but he seemed to realize the motion and stopped it.

“Drive safe,” he said before turning back to his apartment.

The entire drive home Rey tried to think of anything but Ben Solo but was a complete failure. She turned her radio up, drowning out the buzzing of her mind and all the questions she had forming in her heart.

Her apartment felt terribly cold. Despite how many blankets she piled on her bed, there was a deep-seated chill in her bones she couldn’t shake. Rey spent most of the night curled in a ball under her mix of throws and comforters until she finally passed out.

The alarm was not a welcomed sound, nor was the sight of having snoozed it three times already. Rey quickly threw on her clothes, filled a thermos with coffee and enough sugar to make Willy Wonka cringe, and was out the door.

She knew something was wrong the second she opened the door. Usually the lobby was filled with conversation this early in the morning. Musicians were usually arriving and chatting before finding their spot in the rehearsal hall. It was dead silent and the doors to the hall were closed.

Fuck.

Rey quickly went over to the doors, mindful of her instrument on her back. She slid open the door and instantly every eye in the orchestra was on her. Everyone was seated, their instruments at the ready. Rey felt the blood rush from her face. Maybe she was having a terrible dream and she’d wake up and have another go at the morning.

“Miss Niima,” the low voice alone sent a warmness spreading through her chest. She looked up to find Ben Solo leaning against Holdo’s podium and with a less than friendly expression on his face.

Just pretend this didn’t happen. Too bad she forgot Solo was an asshole before she went all silly for his scent. She should have said just pretend this didn’t happen and don’t be a dipshit.

“Sorry,” she mumbled as she started across to the room to her spot. She was passing the violin sections when she caught Finn’s worried gaze. What a great fucking start. She made it halfway past the viola section before she saw Rose’s face. The girl’s eyes were wide, flickering from Rey’s hand to the door trying to silently tell her something. Rey mouthed “what?” but her question was soon answered.

“Niima,” Rey froze, looking over her shoulder at Ben. His brow was furrowed, his lips pulled into a stern frown. His eyes hard and cold. “No drinks in the rehearsal hall.”

“Shit,” Rey looked down at her thermos. She didn’t even get a chance to drink it. She paused, wondering if she could get to her chair to put down her instrument and quickly decided against it, passing back in front of the violas and violins to the door with only the sound of her footsteps to accompany her.

“We don’t have all day!” Solo’s voice called after her. Rey grit her teeth, opening the door just enough to put her thermos outside of the hall. Then she ventured across the same silent expanse in front of Hux who was absolutely beaming at her misery, Finn who was giving her a small smile of support, and Rose who simply held her face in her hands as if she couldn’t bear to watch Rey embarrass herself further.

Rey fumbled through the rows, awkwardly carrying her cello through the narrow aisles until she got to her chair. It was deadly quiet as everyone waited for her. Solo glared at her, leaning on his elbows over the podium. The others watched, especially the woodwinds, as she clumsily pulled out her cello and slammed her music binder on the stand.

“Alright, let’s continue.”

Rey shot Rose a look, her lips silently asking “Where’s Holdo?”

“Sick.” Rose said, throwing a hand over her forehead to signal a fever. Rey had yet to go through and entire day at the orchestra without Holdo’s watchful but stable presence and of course the first time the woman takes sick leave is today.

The orchestra raised their instruments and panic set in.

Rey quickly glance over D’acy’s shoulder to determine what page she should be on. The section leader graciously turned around and whispered a quick “Habanera.”

Rey tore through her binder, settling on the right page just as everyone raised their instruments to play.

Of course it was cello heavy. Of fucking course it was. It couldn’t have been something she could catch her breath in. He wouldn’t let her have a fucking moment she just wished she knew why.

She drew her bow and quickly set to work trying to tune her instrument while occasionally strumming out a note. By the middle of the piece she was sufficiently tuned, but had barely looked at the piece. Her eyes kept flying to her neighbors trying to figure out where they were while miming with her bow. Her eyes occasionally moved up to the podium trying to gauge if Solo could see her faking. He didn’t seem to look her way at all, which made her even more frustrated.

Rey finally managed to get on track with the rest of the cellos for the last half of the final page of the aria. Once the final note was played, she slumped back into her chair, her face covered in sweat and her brain hazy from lack of caffeine.

“Let’s try this one more time for our friend in the cello section,” Solo said, without even bothering to toss a glance her way before raising his hands and throwing the entire orchestra back into the piece. Her ears burned, her bow squeaking until the strength of her grip.

By the end of the morning Rey was positively sick of Carmen. Once they were allowed to lower their instruments, she ran into the hallway to pick up her lukewarm coffee in an attempt to salvage her day. She sat against the wall, trying to appear as small as possible as the rest of the orchestra filed out, she’d already gotten enough attention to last a lifetime. Rose soon followed, sitting beside her in the hallway, laying a comforting hand over hers.

“Rey, are you okay?” she asked, seemingly just as shocked and confused as Rey was.

“I don’t know,” she answered honestly, taking a sip of her coffee. All the sugar had sunk to the bottom and it had the stagnant taste of cooled off coffee that was never meant to be iced.

“Listen, I thought y’all… you know,” Rose said, keeping her voice low as a gaggle of flute players walked by.

“We did!” Rey said, not even ashamed to admit it. Not now. She needed to talk to someone about this and try to figure out what the hell was going on.

“Okay then what the fuck was all that?”

“I don’t know!” Rey cried, leaning her head against her useless thermos. All day temperature control her ass. She was going to send a strongly worded email to her cup manufacture, maybe she’d get a free mug. Rey certainly needed a win. “We agreed to pretend like it didn’t happen and I guess he fucking ran with it.”

“I’m sorry, Rey,” Rose said, scooting closer and wrapping an arm around the girl’s shoulders. Rey felt terrible small in that moment. What had she done that warranted that kind of behavior? She felt humiliated and exhausted and all she wanted to do was kick off her shoes and curl up-

Well, not in Ben Solo’s fucking bed that was for sure.

She wanted to be successful as a musician because of her skill, not because she smelled good to someone in a position of power. There was so much riding on this- her financial future, her value as an artist, setting precedents for other Omegas trying to break through similar barriers. Yet, Ben Solo seemed to determined to discourage her. Stupid fucking Alphas, they fuck you and make you a sandwich and then make your life a living hell when you’re not constantly on their cock.

“It’s okay. I guess I don’t understand Alpha work dynamics,” Rey muttered bitterly, watching a shy Poe Dameron slip past them as quickly as humanly possible. Alphas, what was their damage? She couldn’t blame Dameron he was simply a bystander and who could blame him for not wanting to be around her? First Solo threatens him, then he makes it clear that Rey is some worthless fuck up. No one in the orchestra probably wanted to be around her right now.

“Knot-brains every last one of them,” Rose said, her eyes following Dameron as he turned the corner. Thank God she had Rose. “But Rey I have to ask, was Solo as much of a controlling asshole in bed as he is-”

“Tico, Niima.”

The pair’s heads shot up. Ben Solo stood beside the open rehearsal hall door. “Quartet rehearsal starts in five.”

He vanished behind the door and Rose’s death grip on Rey’s hand loosened.

“Do you think he heard me?” Rose asked, the color drained from her face. Rey patted her friend’s hand, thankful that at least some of today’s humiliation was being shared.

“I don’t know how he couldn’t have.”

Chapter Text

The afternoon went about as well as Rey thought it would. Solo was ruthless, drilling through each song and not biting back any criticism he had for any of them- especially for Rey. The girl kept her head down, eyes firmly planted on her music binder. She didn’t want to look at his face and see the softness beneath the hard angles, or the part so his neck she had kissed right when he brought her to the brink of pleasure.

All of her frustrations she fueled into her music. Her calloused fingers flew across the strings, her head snapping with each sharp pull of her bow. They ran the song again and again, and by the fifth run she was playing Take Me to Church with her eyes closed. For a brief moment, she forgot about the world around her, and all the Alpha and Omega bullshit she was dealing with and let the music carry her. Her passion was music, and that was something that no one would take away from her. Despite being sweaty, tired, and starving Rey drew out the last note with a small smile on her lips. She had nailed it. Every note, every crescendo and every soft piano note. She opened her eyes, high off the song and found Solo staring at her.

For a moment, she thought she saw something in his eyes. The familiar warmth she’d seen alone in his apartment shut away from the rest of the world. And just like that it was gone in a flash, replaced with patented scowl.

“Niima, you were late on measure 32,” he said, quickly turning to Finn and Rose to criticize their performances as well. Rey’s mouth hung open. No way. There was no way. She’d been perfect, she knew it. She slumped in her chair, feeling more beat down in that single moment than she had all day.

“I want it perfect tomorrow,” he said, looking at his three charges. Rey looked up unable to hide how absolutely miserable she felt. If Solo noticed he gave no sign of it, simple turned back to his music and flipped through his binder. “Let’s move on to The Shape of You.”

When rehearsal wrapped Solo quickly packed his violin grabbed his binder and was out the door before anyone could attempt at pleasantries with him. Not that any of them wanted to, not after today. The three of them sat in their chairs, instruments still in hand and looked at one another.

“Uh… what the fuck is going on?” Finn asked, scooting to the edge of his seat.

“Solo is more of an asshole than we ever thought possible,” Rose said bluntly slamming her binder closed. Rey leaned her head against the neck of her cello and closed her eyes.

“I really thought…” Rey stopped herself, scowling at her inner thoughts. She didn’t know what she thought, but whatever it was she was about to say she couldn’t bring life to it by speaking it. It would only hurt more. Her eyes snapped open and fixated on her friends. “Hey, would you guys be up for a drink? I think I could use one.”

“There’s two-dollar wells at Maz’s on Thursdays!” Rose said perking up at the suggestion. Finn chewed on his bottom lip for a moment.

“Can Poe come too? I promised I’d hang out with him after rehearsal,” he said shyly. Rose and Rey turned to him, a million questions on their mind.

“Since when are you two a thing?” Rose asked, nudging him with an elbow.

“We’re not! It’s new, it’s something we’re trying out,” Finn said, his cheeks darkening with a deep blush. Rey decided to keeper her previous interaction with Poe to herself and offered him a smile.

“If he wants to, sure.”

“Awesome, thanks guys. I think you two are going to like hanging out with him. He’s really funny,” Finn said standing and popping his case open to place his violin inside.

“Really, I wouldn’t have him pinned as a jokey kind of guy,” Rey said, throwing open her case and leaning her cello into it.

They gathered their things, slowly making their way to the exit.

“Now I don’t want to get my hopes up, so Rey are you planning on like one sad drink and then going home or are we like… you know getting smashed?” Rose looked up her hopefully, wiggling an eyebrow. Rey tilted her head to the side, thinking about it as they pushed through the rehearsal room doors into the lobby. She glanced down the hallway that led to the private practice rooms the admin offices. She could smell sandalwood wafting down the corridor.

“Smashed,” she said, as if announcing a new law. Rose cheered and Finn smiled, his glance quickly turning back down to his phone where he rapidly punched in another text. Rey smiled at the smirk that pulled at Finn’s lips, and the faint blush still seated on his cheeks. She was glad someone was still love struck in all this.

Wait, let’s not use the word love. That’ll only make things even messier.

They walked out into the parking lot and towards Finn’s car. He had agreed to be their designated driver for the night for which she was grateful. She peeked into his backseat and found it overflowing with clothes, books, and god knows what else.

“Sorry it’s a little messy!” Finn said, the understatement of the century. “You can put your cello back here.”

He popped the drunk only for the overfilled space to spit out a basketball onto the pavement.

“Oh damn, I really thought I had cleaned the trunk out.” Finn said, propping a foot up to stop the ball.

“Maybe you can put your cello in your car?” Rose said, hanging out of the passenger’s seat, her viola tucked into the floorboard.

“Yeah…” Rey said absentmindedly. She didn’t really want to stick her cello in her car to sit overnight, especially in a parking lot in the middle of the city. She gnawed her bottom lip. “I think I’m going to live it inside the rehearsal hall, maybe I can tuck it in a closet for the night.”

“Smart,” Finn said, shoving the basketball inside the trunk and slamming the top closed before it had another chance to escape.

“I’ll be right back,” Rey called over her shoulder, already rushing up to the doors. She pushed through them and turned down the hall to the offices only to run right into someone.

Not anyone, of course. Life couldn’t cut her any slack today.

Ben Solo looked just as surprised to see her as she did him. He was dressed down from rehearsal, his button up shirt replaced by a t-shirt and his khakis swapped for joggers. Rey took a step back, trying not to let the sudden strong scent of sandalwood mess with her mind.

“Rey-” he started, his hand twitching as if to reach for her before settling back to his side. He tried to wear his scowl but it looked bizarre given his attire. “Niima, do you need something?”

Rey cleared her throat, her eyes falling to the floor before she reminded herself, she was a strong, independent Omega and raised them again to his face.

“I- uh,” she swallowed her emotions and tried to be professional. “Can I leave my cello here? Just for the night?”

“Um, yeah of course, you can put it in my office,” he said, his eyes narrowing a little trying to figure out why she would make such a request. His scent spiked, sandalwood and leather clouding her mind. She wished he would just ask her flat out, the question was written all over his face.

“I’m going out for drinks, Finn’s DD, and I didn’t want to leave it in my car overnight.” Not again. He took a step back, motioning for her to make her way to his office.

“Of course.”

She walked down the corridor, mindful of Solo behind her. So, they were really pretending like none of it every happened. Still, she was getting whiplash from all the different shades of Ben Solo. Asshole Concertmaster, caring attentive Alpha, needlessly cruel rehearsal director, and now understand colleague and all within a week.

Honestly, it was impressive.

The door to his office was propped open and she took a deep breath before walking in. She didn’t fail to notice that Ben hung around in the hall, probably afraid to be in such close quarters with her again.

Her eyes took in the wooden shelves and warm lighting of his office. The warm glow came from a lamp set next to the couch, pointed down as if he had been reading. A pile of blankets were stacked on the couch with pillows arranged at one end. Rey pulled her cello case off her shoulder and saw a backpack left on the floor.

She raised an eyebrow, but quietly leaned her cello against his desk and stepped back out into the hallway.

“Sleeping on the job?” she asked with a playful smile, nodding to the couch. Ben’s face paled and she felt her stomach drop.

“I can’t sleep at my apartment,” because of you. The words left unsaid were as loud as if they had been screamed. Rey gripped the hem of her sweater, playing with a loose thread.

“Oh,” she said, kicking herself for even bringing it up. She should have known it was because of her, but after today she couldn’t think of Ben Solo having anything but unbridled contempt for her. “Well, um thank you.”

“Next time consider actually practicing at home instead of drinking,” he said, his words sharp.

Rey screwed her face up, struggling to keep the nasty comments at bay. She took a breath and looked up at his face, a stone mask.

God, she wanted to kiss him and punch him at the same time.

“Duly noted.”

Rey turned on her heel and hurried out to Finn’s car, throwing herself into the back seat.

“Go, I needed a drink three hours ago.”

Maz’s was packed. However, Poe had arrived before them and saved them a small table in the corner. He waved them over, a large grin on his face as he saw Finn approach.

Rey couldn’t help but smell all the different Alphas in the room. They smelled good, but nowhere near as good as Solo had. Like if someone had tried to make a perfume from Ben’s scent and all they could come up with was dull, artificial. Still, she was determined to forget all about him. In fact, instead of greeting Poe first she slipped over to the bar and handed the bartender her credit card. Yes, she would be opening a tab, and yes she would be spending far too much on it.

She returned to the table sipping on a cherry vodka sour. Poe greeted her but they neglected to hug, a good choice.

They talked about the orchestra, and Poe spilled all the gossip from the brass section. Finn was right, he was funny and irresistibly charming. If Rey had any taste she’d probably be into him, but alas her heart seemed to yearn only for the worst of men. Rey was four vodka doubles in when the question finally came.

“So. Solo?” Rose asked, leaning forward.

“Okay guys, let me fucking tell you about Ben goddamn Solo,” Rey said, slamming a hand on the table. Poe and Finn jumped to attention, leaning in to hear every detail. Her whole body felt warm, and she was ready to tell everyone everything.

“He fucked me then left me high and dry like the stupid Alpha he is- no offense Poe,” she said, her words slamming together as her mind worked faster than her lips.

“None taken,” Poe smiled, his hand wrapped around Finn’s.

“I’m going to dance!” Rey shouted, shoving off from the table and making her way to the dance floor. “Come on Rose!”

The pair wedged themselves into the space beneath the speakers blaring loud enough to disrupt any complicated thoughts. They had been dancing for only a short time when Rey met eyes with an Alpha across the floor. He was tall and broad, with blonde hair. He smirked at her, his eyes raking up and down her body. She shivered, drifting away from Rose towards the Alpha. However, as she got closer his smirk dropped and his face contorted into a look of disgust. He turned away from her and moved through the crowd towards the bar.

Okay. Weird.

Rey tried not to let it faze her, and kept dancing and it was only a matter of time before she locked eyes with another Alpha. He started dancing close to her his dark eyes suggestive, and then he paused, he wrinkled his nose and turned away.

What the hell?

Rey marched back to the table, throwing herself in a chair oblivious to how close Poe and Finn’s faces were. They quickly put space between themselves as she began to complain.

“Not a single Alpha will dance with me, what the hell is that about?” Rey complained, swishing the melting ice around in her empty glass.

“It’s your smell,” Poe said casually.

“My what?”

“You smell like Solo, it’s pretty strong to be honest. Like ‘just mated’ strong,” he said, taking a swing of beer.

“Okay, but we didn’t mate,” Rey pointed out, leaning across the table as if that would further her talking point.

“I know, but I’m just telling you what I smell,” Poe shrugged.

Rey slumped in her chair and Finn and Poe turned back to their whispered conversation. She was too fidgety to just sit there and if no Alpha would dance with her, she’d have to drink her sorrows away even more.

She downed three more drinks, each with a different liquor. Rey hadn’t drank like that since college, and the whole world was becoming slower and brighter with each minute.

She danced, she drank, she laughed at something Rose said. Then she was cold, standing on the bar’s patio with Finn’s hand on her shoulder.

“Rey, it’s time to go. Do you need to close out?” she tried to focus on his face but it kept fucking moving. She nodded, vaguely aware that the bartender still had her credit card and she didn’t want to pay that stupid fee for forgetting it. Poe had Rose slumped against his side, already leading it out through the bar to the exit. Evidently, they both had a little too much to drink.

“I have to show Poe where I parked, can you close out by yourself?” he was speaking slowly enough that Rey understood. She nodded, the motion sending her vision swirling. “Good, I’ll be right back.”

Rey shuffled through the bar, the music a distant pulsing beneath her feet. She moved to the bar where the bartender had changed sometime during the night. Oh no, she drank through a shift change that’s not good.

“Niima,” she said, leaning heavily on the wood of the bar. The girl tapped the name into the computer, and Rey was fixated on her sparkling long manicured nails. Wouldn’t it make it hard to type with those? And yet here she was doing it like a pro- go you bartender girl. “Looks like you’re already closed for the night.”

The girl smiled at her as if it was a “Yay, all done” kind of deal. It was not all done, she was missing her fucking credit card. Rey blinked. She could just walk to Finn’s car and deal with the identity theft in the morning, but that’s not the professional adult thing to do.

And she was a professional adult, no matter how unbelievable sloppy drunk she was.

“No wait, I didn’t-,” her struggling words were soon cut off by a large hand on her shoulder.

“Come on time to go, it’s taken care of,” a low, familiar voice said. Rey leaned into the warmth behind her, her face resting against a soft sweater pulled taunt over a muscled chest. They smelled amazing, like that incense her roommate burned back at uni. Teakwood? Cherrywood?

She leaned against him, an arm wrapping around her shoulder leading her outside of the bar and into the chill of the night. They walked down the sidewalk before crossing the street where Finn was waiting beside his car.

She remembered being guided into the backseat, and then waking up just enough for Poe and Finn to walk her up to her apartment door. She stumbled inside, conscious just long enough to lock the door, kick off her shoes, and faceplant into her comforter.

Chapter Text

Rey was woken up not by the blaring of her alarm but of the sudden queasiness building in her stomach. She jumped out of bed and managed to stumble into the bathroom in time to throw up thirty dollars’ worth of drinks into the toilet. Exhausted, she slumped back into the bedroom and collapsed back against the sheets. Her body was exhausted, her stomach still overcome with nausea, and her head throbbing. She squinted at the bright red letters of her alarm clock. It was still hours until she needed to get up.

She laid in bed, staring at the ceiling trying to will away all the thoughts crowding her head. There were the primitive ones- stomach hurt, brain hurt, maybe dying? But also, the emotional thought bubbles that rose to the top of the mental soup.

Her memory was hazy, but she still remembered how those Alphas’ looked. Sneering at her as if she had tricked them. They didn’t want to have anything to do with her because…

Because she smelled like Ben Solo’s property. That was some old-world bullshit.

Sighing, she slipped out of bed walking through her dark apartment to the kitchen. She poured herself a glass of water and chugged it down faster than it had left the faucet. Rey looked to the clock again as if the time would have magically zipped forward only to find the little red numbers glaring back her.

3:37

Ug.

The stink of her own body hit her, and it wasn’t the claim Ben had left on her skin. She had slept in her clothes from the day before and her nose still stung with the scent of a binge drinking vomit session. She looked through her pockets and her wallet, groaning as she realized she left her card at the bar. Yet another task to do today. Perhaps it was for the best, after another day at work she’d need another round of drinks.

After some time in a steaming hot shower Rey decided that if she couldn’t sleep, she might as well start the day. She threw on jeans and a t-shirt, slipped into a cardigan that hadn’t spent the evening in a bar, and called an Uber for the music hall.

One might think arriving to work hours early and waking up your boss so you can scratch out some cheesy wedding pop songs would be considered rude. Well, considering the circumstances Rey didn’t care much whether it was impolite. In fact, if she kept Solo awake with a constant repeat of a cello solo rendition of Sweet Caroline- so be it. She marched down the dark hallway, trying to clear her mind of any Omega-ish thoughts.

Don’t think about how good it smells in here, don’t think about how he looks, don’t think about him at all. He’s an asshole and your boss and that is it.

Except her well laid out plan of ignoring her own brain evaporated the second the music hit her.

Rey froze, simply listening to the notes drifting down the hallway. Solo’s office door was propped open, the warm glow of his lamp spilling into the dim hallway along with his song. She stood in the dark of the corridor listening to the plucking of the strings. It wasn’t a piece she had heard before, but something that seemed uniquely him. It started out harsh, thick strings thumping against the violin before his bow slid over them making them sing in harmony. It was like a siren’s call. Rey felt the music pull at her chest, the smell of sandalwood wrapping around her mind. She wanted to watch his hand fly over the fingerboard, his brow creased in concentration as the muscles in his back flexed to yank the bow into place.

It was perfect. Even playing in the early morning hours for no one to hear, Ben Solo was a master.

Rey drifted towards the door, leaning against the doorframe to peer into the room. He was shirtless, his black joggers low across his waist. His back was to her, his shoulders on full display as he fell deeper into his music. She watched him for a moment, listening to the sad slow pull of his song until the bow hit the wrong note. Rey watched every muscle in his pale expanse of back tense.

Of course, he smelled her before she made a sound.

“Niima,” he said, twisting around to look at her. Rey was surprised to see his cheeks flushed a deep red as his eyes met hers. He held his violin awkwardly over his chest as if he could hide behind the small instrument. If he was going to say anything else, it was too late now as a silence settled between the two musicians. Confronted with the Alpha’s embarrassment Rey felt blood creep up to her own cheeks. She quickly adverted her gaze as if she hadn’t seen every inch of his body already.

“I thought I’d take your advice and practice,” she said, brown eyes fixated on the floor.

“I figured you’d be asleep after all the drinking you did,” he said. Rey considered telling him the truth for a moment. That she felt terrible, had a horrific hangover induced headache, and that she’d kill a man for a cup of coffee. Instead, she told him what he’d want to hear.

“I only had one drink and then went home. Early bird gets the worm, right?” she looked to his face and saw a flicker of something pass over his eyes. It was gone as quickly as it appeared.

“Well, don’t let me stop you.” Ben stepped to the side, clearing a straight path to where her cello still sat leaning against his desk. Rey lurched forward, quickly grabbing it by the handle and marching back to the door.

“Uh, thanks,” she threw over her shoulder, avoiding looking at his still very bare chest, before marching down to a practice room.

It was nice to practice alone for once. She spent most of her rehearsal trying to match Finn and Rose or surviving the barraging insults from Solo and it was rather pleasant to play and hear only the single part of a song knowing later all the pieces would fall in place. Rey ran threw every song one by one but paid a little extra time to the songs she liked more. The Chain by Fleetwood Mac was stuck in their binder even though certainly no one would request it played at a wedding. Rumors wasn’t exactly an album for happy newlyweds.

Rey closed her eyes, feeling the music vibrate through her body. She remembered listening to the song on a cassette so many years ago. She’d worn it down playing it in her portable tape player until the tape had snapped from being rubbed thin. The drums had beat in time with her heart and it was the first time she’d felt connected to music as more than something to just listen to.

It was a much-needed reminder of why she was here.

Rey hummed along with her cello, her mind filling in her own playing with the recording’s memory.

“Hey,” Rey snapped her bow down, whipping around her chair at the sudden intrusion. Solo stood in the doorway as startled by her reaction as she was by his presence. He was dressed for work now, a white dress shirt tucked into black slacks. He was holding a small carrier with two cups of coffee and a small white bag. “I thought you might want some breakfast.”

Rey blinked, her eyes flickering from the steaming rising from the cups to Ben Solo’s face. She wasn’t sure if it was a trap or not, or some kind of test? Maybe she was playing so poorly he no longer had insults and was bribing her to stop.

Still, it was coffee and she couldn’t say no to that.

“Okay,” she said cautiously, standing up and leaving her cello behind in the practice room. She followed him into his office, grabbing a cup from the carrier after he set it on his desk. She took a sip and immediately gagged.

“Oh, that’s mine,” Ben said quickly, handing her the other cup and taking the offending black coffee away. She took a sip from the new cup and it was perfectly teeth rotting sweet. Ben watched her for a moment before quickly shoving the white bag towards her. “You should eat.”

“How do you know I haven’t already?” Rey answered, quirking an eyebrow up at him.

“Have you?”

“No.”

“Then eat.”

Rey sighed, snatching the bag from his hand and was surprised by the weight of it. She set her coffee down and opened it to find it full of various types of muffins, scones, croissants and any other breakfast pastry you could think of.

“Did you buy out a bakery?” Rey asked, showing him the sheer amount of food he had bought.

“Well, I wasn’t sure what you liked,” his voice was quiet, his eyes wandering around the room. Rey felt a smirk tug at her lips but quickly stifled it.

Her inner omega preened at his attention, but she refused to believe his actions were driven by anything other than the ill side effects of being an Alpha. Still, she accepted the abundant offering and grabbed a muffin off the top of the pile. She took a bite, letting the warm buttery pastry melt against her tongue.

“Hmm, I love blueberry,” Rey moaned through the crumbs, her body hungry for anything other than alcohol after such a rough night. She raised a hand to her mouth, remembering her manners and trying not to show off all the muffin tumbling around between her teeth. She looked at Ben shyly and found his eyes hyper focused on her face. She couldn’t stop the blush from rising onto her cheeks.

“Thanks for this, by the way,” Rey said, face flushed and mouth still full of muffin.

“Yeah. No worries.” That seemed to break Ben out of his trance, he took a sip of coffee before quickly sliding past her into the hallway and leaving without another word.

Rey practiced the rest of the morning, slowly draining her coffee and stuffing more pastries into her mouth. Ben never came back around, nor did she hear him playing in any of the other practice rooms. He didn’t even eat any of the food he’d bought.

Rey wandered over to the rehearsal hall as the other orchestra members began shuffling in. Rey stood in the hallway outside with her bag of treats, deciding to share them with Rose whenever she arrived. From what Rey remembered the girl was going to need something this morning, she drank more than Rey did and was way smaller.

Poe showed up first. He had bags under his eyes but looked better than Rey felt.

“Hey, want some breakfast?” she said, holding out the bag. His eyes went wide and quickly grabbed two scones from it, shoveling one into his mouth before speaking.

“You went through all this trouble for me? You shouldn’t have,” Poe winked at her and Rey giggled. Finn was right, he was incredibly charming. It’s a shame she didn’t get to meet funny charismatic Poe first.

“Actually, these are courtesy of our illustrious concertmaster.” Poe’s mood changed and he took in her face more soberly, looking for something on her face.

“Oh,” Poe looked at the scone for a moment as if suspicious of it. “Okay. Weird.”

“Yeah, you’re telling me.”

The Alpha took a bite, looking at the bag in her suspiciously.

“I have a theory,” he mumbled through the crumbs. “I’ll tell you about it later.”

He winked at her and marched past it, obviously unafraid of the powers that be prohibiting food in the rehearsal hall.

A theory? Rey would love to be privy to it. She’d kill for just a clue.

She nursed her coffee, waiting for Rose as the other musicians filed in. Some avoided her gaze, leaving a wide berth between them in the hall as they passed by. She couldn’t help but feel that she stunk of failure. Everyone had heard Solo’s words thrown at her yesterday. No doubt they thought of her as highly as he did.

How did he think of her anyway?

Going back to the beginning she knew that base line Ben Solo was, by default, a jerk. No circling around that. He was pompous, quick to anger, and didn’t think much of anyone in the orchestra besides maybe Holdo. Then, boom, Alpha switch gets flicked and Rey gets to spend some of the best hours of her life wrapped up in his scent and held close against his body. Then the heat ends, and Solo has overdone himself trying to revert back to a cold supervisor.

Did he really hate her that much?

Yet this morning he’d been bordering on friendly. Probably just his Alpha instincts poking through the thick veil of dickhead insisting that he do something what nice for an Omega. Especially an Omega he’d fucked this week. In the end it’s all hormones. Ben Solo hadn’t given her the time of day before her heat, and it would only make since that he resented her for trigging the biological impulse to actually give a shit about her. She didn’t like caring about him either.

Rey looked down at the bag of food and threw into the trashcan beside her. Rose could fend for herself for the morning.

The girl marched into the rehearsal hall and made a beeline for the brass section. Poe Dameron was fiddling with his French horn when she reached him.

Huh, she would have pegged him as a trumpet player.

“What’s your theory?” she asked, shifting the weight of her cello on her back. Poe’s brown eyes slid side to side where the other musicians were obviously listening in before returning her glance.

“You want to do this right now?” he whispered, leaning over his music stand.

“Yes, if you don’t mind,” Rey said, beginning to wilt under the attentions of the tuba players. She shifted her cello off her back onto the floor and kneeled beside Poe’s chair, her hand instinctively landing on his knee to keep her balance.

“He’s just being very…” Poe considered the word before spitting it out. “Alpha.”

“That’s not helpful.”

“God, didn’t you take a designations class?”

“No, I was a music major.”

“I got a minor in Designation Sciences.”

“Good for you Dr. Dameron, share your knowledge with the ignorant children.”

“Rey,” Poe sighed, slouching in his chair. “He’s obviously fighting against his Alpha impulses. Being rude to you is his way of ignoring them, and instances like- well like this morning with the pastries are when they pull through.”

“Oh,” Rey crumpled under his words. She’d been thinking it, of course, and had even reached out to confirm it but it still hurt. That meant every moment she spent in his apartment, her legs tangled up with his, their lips desperately pressed together was just… biology. Hormones released at just the right time and yet at the worst time. “That’s kind what I thought…”

Rey chewed on lip, her cheeks flushing with shame as Poe’s words sunk in. She was right, Ben really didn’t care for her and was fighting against himself. Pastries and soft kisses were not Ben’s true feelings, his harsh remarks and sharp words were.

“Good morning everyone,” Holdo’s voice echoed around the rehearsal hall, her binder under one arm, as she power walked to her podium. Rey wanted to be happy that their conductor was finally back from leave, but she was captured by the man in a dress shirt and black slacks standing stiffly in the doorway. He had his instrument in one hand, the other holding the door open for Holdo who had long ago passed through it and his eyes were on Rey. She felt a million emotions in that single moment. Want, fear, shame, desire, hurt, and a hundred other ones she couldn’t put a name to. A muscle in his jaw twitched, his teeth on edge as he looked at her.

Must be hard caring about someone you hate. Rey decided not to prolong the man’s pain and turned back to Poe.

“Thanks, Dameron,” she whispered, squeezing his knee before walking over to her chair to set up her instrument.

“Now don’t everyone talk all at once,” Holdo said, looking up at the orchestra over her glasses. “I’m doing fine, not that anyone asked, just a nasty cold that your brave conductor has finally overcome. I hope you all had a good time with Mr. Solo at the helm.”

No one spoke. All the musicians turned their eyes to Ben still standing in the doorway looking completely lost. Holdo followed their gaze, her eyes squinting at the young man as if trying to piece together his thoughts.

“Well, in any case I’m back. As a reminder we have a benefit concert coming up in a few weeks and we want everything to polished and perfect, so everyone yanks out their checkbook and writes fat checks, okay?”

“I AM SO SORRY I’M LATE MR. SOLO- I,” Rose burst into the rehearsal hall. She was wearing the clothes she had on at the bar, mascara smudged beneath her eyes and her viola case hugged tightly against her chest. She smashed into Ben’s shoulder as she barreled through and stopped to apologize but found Holdo looking at her along with the rest of the orchestra. “Oh… Ms. Holdo… nice to see you’re doing better.”

“Thank you for noticing,” Holdo gave the girl a small nod and Rose quickly ran to her seat. Rey suddenly felt bad for throwing away all those pastries, it looked like Rose really could have used one today. “Ahem, Ben would you like to take a seat? It’s the front one on the left there like it always is.”

“What? Oh.” Ben snapped out of whatever trance he was caught in and shuffled to his chair. Rey didn’t dare watch him; instead she kept her eyes down plucking at the strings of her cello.

“Okay, so I’m not sure what you guys have been up to for the last few days but let’s shake it off and get into gear. Mozart’s 40th- let’s go, people!”

The Chandrila Philharmonic had definitely had better rehearsals. Despite the piece being a familiar one, their performance didn’t sound particularly good. After the last note of the Molto Allegro resolved, Rey flinched in preparation for an insult but soon remembered that Amilyn Holdo was, at her very core, a professional. She crossed her arms over her chest, looking over her orchestra making eye contact with as many people as she could. Her gaze settled last on Ben Solo. The concertmaster held his chin up, met her gaze and quickly looked away.

Wow.

Rose abruptly turned over her shoulder to make a face at Rey that said Did you see that? Rey nodded in reply, her mouth hanging open just a smidge.

It had been silent, but Ben Solo had admitted defeat in front of everyone. Rey caught Finn’s eye, who was equally as bewildered. Everyone shifted uncomfortably in their chairs, cases and binders rattling around in the quiet rehearsal hall.

No one wanted to disappoint Holdo, but it seemed even worse to see the great Ben Solo hang his head in shame.

“Well hell it’s Friday,” Holdo finally said, a forced smile touching her lips. “Let’s work on our small group pieces and start fresh altogether on Monday.”

The silence of the room was finally broken by everyone gathering their things and shoving chairs into place. Rey stayed in place, watching Ben who was gripping his binder, staring so hard he might burn holes in them.

Rey jumped when Rose sat on the ground, leaning against her chair.

“Rey, I feel like garbage,” Rose groaned.

“Yeah, same,” Rey said, leaning against the neck of her cello. Her late night and early morning were beginning to catch up to her, her coffee doing little to fight off her growing headache.

“Why does it feel more and more like a high school band hall in here?” Rose said, her head falling back to rest against Rey’s thigh.

“Because we’re hormonal and suck,” Rey mumbled, watching as Poe abandoned his French Horn group and ventured into the string section to meet them.

“Rey,” Poe began, glancing over his shoulder quickly before turning back to her. “I didn’t get to finish earlier.”

“Yeah, Poe you didn’t need to,” Rey said, waving him away. “I was confirming what I already thought. I get it. Alpha hormones make you do weird stuff even to people you don’t like.”

“Well, sort of but not exactly-” Poe began, his hands flying up trying to express his words quicker through motions instead of words.

“Poe, we get it he’s an asshole,” Rose said, eyes closed, an arm draped over her face to block out the fluorescent lighting.

“Yes, that’s true, but not what I was saying-”

“Dameron.” Everyone snapped to attention at the Alpha tone. Solo stood behind Poe, his music binder gripped so tightly Rey thought the plastic might break. “Unless you plan on taking up bass, please return to your section.”

His tone was in no way friendly, his dark eyes drilling holes into the horn player. Poe seemed equally on edge; his jaw tensed as he stood toe to toe with the other Alpha.

“Sorry, I was talking with my friends. I realize that may be a foreign concept to you,” Poe spat back. Rose gasped, and Rey could only watch in horror. It was no longer just cello section listening in, but the violas and the bassoons and oboes as well. The double basses were watching from behind their instruments.

“Watch yourself, Dameron,” Ben hissed. Both men looked ready to pounce and Rey began to move her cello to stop it, but unlike the last time they had met there was no Frebreze on hand. Luckily, just as Poe parted his lips to mouth off again Finn appeared having run over from the second violins and grabbed Dameron by the arm.

“Poe!” Finn screeched through his teeth; his eyes wide at Dameron as if trying to tell him to shut the fuck up by his pupils alone. “I think your section is missing you.”

Dameron gave Ben another hard look before marching back to the French horns who all looked incredibly nervous with no idea what to do with themselves.

Solo’s eyes settled on the three of them, still tense from the standoff. He avoided Rey’s gaze. She tried not to take it personally, but she still felt the sting.

“Let’s begin.”

Chapter Text

Rey had started playing the cello in middle school. A family of millionaires looking to do some good plucked her school out of the sandy Jakku dirt and gave them a music program. She’d spent every day after class in the music room, practicing. She’d practice until she was thrown out of the building and then walk in early the next day for more. So rabid had been her appetite for music, for making it with her own hands. On the last day of her eighth-grade year, her teacher had presented her with her very own cello and a letter from the head of the Skywalker Fund.

For your intense love of music, may it always bring you and those around you joy. – L.

It was written in the messy hand of an adult who isn’t used to handwriting letters, especially not to orphans. Rey would read the note over and over again, vowing to do just as he said. She promised herself to take that man’s gift and bring joy to everyone around her.

Rey wasn’t feeling very joyful now.

Since she’d started playing, Rey had formed thick calluses on the fingertips of her left hand. The result from pressing against thick, stiff strings everyday for most of your life. Those first months of building hard skin on such a delicate area of her hands was agony, but she had pushed through it. Some of the other kids would cut their practice time short, but not Rey. She had to use every minute she was there and not at the group home to make something of herself. To make something joyful and pretty. They were a mark of pride for her. Something she could look at and remind herself- I’m a professional musician.

It was within the second hour of quartet rehearsal that the first callus busted open. The thick skin built up on her index finger cracked and splintered and she felt the sting of air hitting nerves. Rey stared at the injury for a moment, watching a single small bead of blood well up to the surface before a measure was called out and she had to dive back into the music.

Pain shot through her hand as the wound pressed against the strings, but she bit back her words and kept going. She wasn’t expecting any kind of sympathy, not from anyone. She knew from experience she rarely got it. Even more so now. She ignored the ever-present smell of sandalwood and Solo’s foot taping out the beat in the corner of her eye and thought only of the music.

They wrapped up a song that was far too peppy for Rey’s current emotions and she took the chance to look at her hand again. Her ring finger’s callus had cracked as well, but not as deep. Still she felt a twinge of sadness looking at years of hard work ruined in a moment. It’d take weeks for them to heal back to normal and playing everyday wouldn’t help the process. Especially playing at the break neck pace Solo expected.

“Do it again,” Ben snapped, not even bothering to look up from his music. Rey chanced a glance up at him. His dark hair was pushed back from his face, his dark eyes already zeroing in on the music before him. She opened her mouth to protest, but he was already pressing his bow to his strings and at once the quartet flew into the song again. Rey cringed as she missed the first note and hoped he wouldn’t notice.

Who was she trying to kid? Of course, he noticed.

Rey grit her teeth together. She couldn’t focus on Solo right now, she needed all her brain power on the music. She couldn’t think about Solo, her fingers, and the music. So Alphas and injuries went by the wayside and she focused on the notes.

The song hit the last measure, and Rey quickly scratched out the second to last note before she slouched back into her chair. She shook out her left hand, cringing at the hot pain radiating from her fingertip. She looked up to speak to Rose but found Ben’s eyes on her. It was hard to tell what he was feeling; his face was a grim mask carefully held in place and his eyes were hard. Her throat went dry.

“You didn’t finish the piece, Niima,” he said, his tone calm. “How about you play it for the rest of us, since we actually played the last note.”

Rey looked to Finn, he gave her a weak smile. Rose looked as exhausted as Rey felt and she gave her a small nod of her head. Rey took a breath, trying to let out all the frustration building in her chest out on a single exhale. Just tell him you need a break, he’ll understand.

“Now, Niima.”

Rey stopped and looked at Ben. He was sitting up right, unlike the other two who had jumped at the chance to relax for a moment. He was watching her closely.

She didn’t need a break. She needed to show him what she could do.

Rey drew her bow, deciding her fingers could wait. She made it halfway through the piece before Ben stopped her.

“Measure 32- watch your pitch. Start over.”

Rey balked for a moment before jerking her head back to her music to start again. She dove into the music, trying not wince as her cracked calluses pressed against the strings.

“Stop. You’re too loud- start again.”

Rey closed her eyes for a moment. Her stomach was doing flip flops. The familiar rage brewing in her stomach, the same storm that blew when she had punched her temporary foster brother when she was six, or when she snapped at her case worker as a teenager. The unrelenting feeling of unfairness that she felt helpless to stop. She didn’t think she’d ever feel it again. She channeled all that anger at the world into her cello so many years ago, and yet here it was tempting to push her over the edge and make her say things she didn’t mean. Rey let the air in her lungs blow out of her nostrils like a dragon blowing smoke.

“Niima, we don’t have all day for you to get it right.”

She didn’t look at him, only began to play but was quickly stopped by his voice chiming in again.

“Watch your bow placement.”

Rey rolled her neck and set her bow to the strings again. She almost got to the chorus before Ben’s voice halted the music again.

“Faster.”

Again, from the top, she started out the song, mashing her wounded fingers against the fingerboard harder than necessary.

“Faster.”

Rey didn’t stop but sped up. Her left hand was cramping up from pressing too hard against the instrument. She didn’t need to be slamming her hand against the wood, but it made her feel better. She raced through the next line, working faster but softer and keeping her back straight and bow arm up. Suddenly the intuitiveness of playing had dissolved, and she was left trying to remember all of the techniques she learned years ago. She could feel the tension building in her shoulders and knew she needed to relax- she could once she finished this damn song.

“Faster!”

Rey smacked her fingers down and as she did the thick metal of the cello string caught the edge of her cracked callus. She didn’t realize until she’d already jerked her hand to the next position, and by then the thick piece of skin had already been ripped off. Raw skin hit the tense metal string and pain rippled through her arm. Her bow skipped and the measure scratched to a halt.

“Start again.”

Rey flinched as the pain in her finger bloomed. She quickly dropped her bow and grabbed her cello with her right hand to prevent more blood from seeping into the wood. Her heart was beating wildly, ready to slam right out of her chest. Her hands were trembling, and she felt a million pairs of eyes on her. No one was playing anymore- they were all watching her trial by fire. A trial she couldn’t help but feel like she failed. Her fingers and her soul consumed by fire.

“Niima, we’re not done.”

Rey turned on him. Ben Solo. Weren’t Alphas supposed to care for Omegas? Have some small weakness for them? Her cheeks were on fire. Rey stood up carrying her cello over and thrusting the neck, sticky with warm blood, into his hand.

“I am.” She hissed before turning for the door. The eyes on her were too much, every person here got to peer into her life, and it felt invasive. They all got to watch Ben demand too much of her and no one said a god damn thing. Her feet broke into a sprint and before she knew it she was crashing through the doors into the hallway.

The green dingy carpet seemed to spin beneath her. Rey grabbed her knees, trying to focus on the coffee stain on the floor in front of her to ground her mind if even for a moment.

She, of course, didn’t get this moment. Solo burst through the doors behind her. Rey flinched, standing up straight and preparing for his mighty Alpha wrath. She was still on a probationary period; the orchestra could cut her off and not even have to file paperwork for it. Rey took a breath, ready for the worst.

“You’re bleeding.” Ben was… worried? He didn’t stop his stride until he was in front of her. He took her hand and Rey let him, watching as he inspected her fingers. “This is bad, come with me there’s a first aid kit in my office.”

There was a part of her that truly wanted to follow him. To curl up on the couch in his office that would surely smell like him and let her Alpha dote on her. But he wasn’t her Alpha. That much had become pretty clear. Her chest felt tight as she wrenched her hand away, holding it close to her own chest.

“What are you doing?” she demanded.

“I’m trying to help you.”

“No, not right now. I mean all of it, this week- what are you trying to do?” She was on a roll now. She didn’t give Ben a breath of a pause to but in. Rey had kept all her emotions tied up in a pretty bow in front of him for far too long. “Are you trying to get me to quit? Is that it? You obviously don’t want me here- you don’t want me in your orchestra, but you can’t fire an Omega, is that it? You’ve been making me feel like garbage all week, so you don’t have to get you hands dirty.”

She jabbed a finger into his chest, digging into the muscle beneath his shirt. Rey was on fire and no fog of sandalwood or cool alpha tones would be able to extinguish it. He stood frozen; his face emotionless as she drilled into him.

“You’re not going to get that satisfaction from me, Alpha,” she let the word fall from her tongue like syrup, sneering as it left her lips. He sagged under her words, his eyes looking tired. He opened his mouth, but she raised a finger to silence him. “I’m not going to quit, no matter what you tell me. You can yell at me in front of everyone every day, you can belittle me, you can make me feel like nothing but if you want me gone you’re going to have to do it yourself.”

Rey didn’t realize she had started crying until the warm tears slid down her cheek. She stood, her entire body trembling, glaring up at Ben Solo.

“I don’t want you to quit.” His voice was soft. Rey furrowed her brow at him, trying to figure out what kind of game he was trying to play. Her eyes glistened with more tears, and she felt her anger start to cool but held onto it. It was the only thing keeping her from collapsing into a complete mess.

“What?”

“I don’t want you to go, I don’t want you to quit.” His eyes were on the floor between them, his face pale. “I didn’t- I haven’t intended to make you feel that way.”

“Well, what did you intend?” she snapped, her breathing coming quickly. Her eyes searched his face, looking for anything to hang onto in the wave of confusion and conflicting emotions. Ben shifted under her gaze looking uncomfortable.

“I was afraid people might think I was giving you preferential treatment because of our.. our time together. I didn’t want them to think that you got your chair here by anything other than your skill.”

She glared into him harder, the question harshly snapping from her lips. “Why do you care what people think about me?”

Ben took a breath, gathering his thoughts before calmly continuing, ignoring her question.

“You said you wanted to forget about everything, Rey. I’m sorry I couldn’t do that,” the words came out in a slow, steady tone. As if he had rehearsed the sentence repeatedly. He let out a long breath, his shoulders relaxing as if finally dropping the weight of the world off them. “If you’re happy with Dameron I’ll get out of your way and I’ll watch my tone.”

“Wait, what?” Rey was completely lost.

“You and Dameron!”

“Dameron is fucking Finn!”

“Uh- wait-”

“And wait a fucking second what do you mean I said to forget everything?”

“You said you wanted to forget about- forget about your heat and us so I did, or I tried to!” he said, his hand starting to gesture with his words as his own frustration began to bubble to the surface.

“I didn’t say that,” Rey said, shaking her head, holding a hand to her forehead as if her entire skull might fly off at any minute.

“Yes, you did!”

“No, I said we should, like, act normal at work.”

“You might have thought that, but that is not what came out of your mouth.”

“I don’t remember what I said!”

“Well I do! It echoes in my head every damn day!”

“Why would that even matter to you?”

“Because, Rey, I don’t want to forget about it!”
“W-why?” she stuttered.

“Because I fucking like you Rey! I care about you and I want you to be safe and happy and all those stupid Alpha feelings that make me feel all fuzzy and dumb when you’re around! I want to make you breakfast every morning because you obviously skip it! And I want to put a band-aid on your finger because my instincts are telling me my Omega is hurt and I feel my skin is going to crawl off if I don’t fix it!”

“Ohhhhhhhh,” Rey said, her eyes wide as a million realizations bloomed in her mind. “Shit.”

Chapter Text

Rey sat on the large brown couch in Solo’s office, holding her hand out as he worried over her fingers. He washed her fingertips, the alcohol stinging worse than original injury. Rey gasped, gripping the couch cushions with her free hand.

“I’m sorry,” Ben quickly said, a hand touching her knee. He was kneeling on the floor in front of her but looked ready to jump up into action if she asked. Rey shook the pain off focusing on the dark eyes peering up at her.

“It’s okay,” she croaked out, her abused fingers twitching in his hand. Ben ran his thumb over her palm before reaching into his first aid kit. He applied ointment to the wounds and gently wrapped each finger in bandages. Rey watched him as he worked, his face a picture of focus as nimble fingers worked the gauze carefully around her skin. Tight enough to stay on but not tight enough to cause discomfort. His hand kept brushing her wrist, a shiver running down her spine with each bit of contact. She knew her scent was spiking, but so was his. She savored the smell of sandalwood, taking in deep breaths and letting it calm her frantic pulse. It felt good not to fight. She wasn’t ignoring her body anymore, but simply being. Her shoulders relaxed and she sank back into the cushions as Ben returned everything to his plastic first aid case.

Ben stood up, and Rey couldn’t stop the lazy smile that touched her lips as his frame unfolded in front of her. She looked up at him, relishing the angle that extenuated the broadness of his shoulders and brought a new wave of Alpha scent over her. He caught her expression and a smirk tugged at one side of his mouth as he returned to the far side of his desk to put his kit away. The drawer shut and he turned to look at her, his large desk placed strategically between them.

“What now?” he asked. It wasn’t rushed or demanding, but she could feel him worrying. Rey rolled her head, her cheek pressed against leather.

“We have to finish rehearsal,” she said. Ben tensed up. They’d been gone for at least twenty minutes and there would be questions when they returned.

“We could take the day off.”

“We’ve already skipped out on too much rehearsal,” Rey said. Despite all her flaws, she was an ambitious musician, and with the dust starting to settle she’d like to rehearse without all of the critiques. Believe it or not, playing her cello was the one thing in life Rey was certain she enjoyed, and she didn’t want to dread it anymore.

“Okay,” Ben shifted, before starting for the door.

“I’m still upset with you,” Rey said, still lounging on the couch.

“I know,” he said, giving her a remorseful look. The Alpha scent fogged her mind, and while it cooled her anger her frustrations were still there. She’d take the calmness it offered but she had to look at the facts. There was still plenty they had to work out, but right now in the middle of a rehearsal with the entire orchestra waiting for them to return, was not the time. Also Rose and Finn must be worried out of their minds.

“As long as you know,” she said, pushing herself up to her feet. She saw Ben’s shoulder jerk forward, as if he was going to reach for her, but he quickly shoved his hands in his pockets. Rey pretended not to notice the action, slipping past his large frame into the hallway. She took in another deep breath of his heady Alpha scent letting it sit in her lung before slowly blowing it out. Smelling Ben was like smoking weed, especially right now as all the pheromones in his scent signaled to her that it was okay. Everything was fine, she was safe with her Alpha so close. Ben closed the office door behind them and looked up at her, an eyebrow raised knowingly.

“Stop it,” Rey said, but a smile crossed her face giving away all her thoughts.

“I’m not doing anything,” Ben replied, his hands up in the air to prove his innocence. His eyes focused on her, his voice dropping low. “It’s not my fault you love how I smell.”

A wire crossed and Rey could practically feel sparks inside her skull as she tried to think. Her first thought was Oh please keep talking to me like that but she snapped to her senses to smack that thought away.

“Well, if I get to huff your scent you deserve the same,” Rey said, shoving her sleeve up and thrusting her exposed wrist up towards Ben’s face. He tried to step back, but deep-rooted instinct won over. His mouth hung open for a moment, his pupils dilated. His hand quickly clamped over her wrist; his palm firmly pressed against her scent gland.

“I’ll take a rain check on that,” he said, his voice strained. Rey quickly pulled her arm back. It was rather rude to shove a scent gland in his face, especially in public of all places. She felt bad putting him in such a position.

Then again, he deserved it. She hoped her smell taunted him the rest of the day.

They started down the hallway towards the rehearsal hall.

“So, how is this going to go?” Rey asked, tugging her sleeves over her wrists lest the rest of the Alphas in the orchestra catch wind of her.

“Hm?”

“Are you going to yell at me again?”

“No! No, I-”

“Then what are we going to do in there? We can’t leave yelling and come back fine.”

“Rey- we can’t stand here all day trying to figure out what we’re going to do- we just have to do it,” Ben said. He sounded frustrated, but also genuine. Rey raised an eyebrow. It was the most Alpha answer he could have given, but sometimes that wasn’t a bad thing. Sometimes you did need to barrel through headfirst.

“Okay, just…. Just wait a few minutes after I go in,” she said. Rey put her hand on the door handle before looking over her shoulder again. “I’m still mad.”

“As you should be.”

Rey nodded and slipped into the rehearsal hall. She was prepared for stares, but she wasn’t prepared for every single flute player to abruptly stop playing and snap their necks around so quickly she thought they might fly off. The songs that had been filling the building came to a screeching halt as everyone turned to the door.

Shit.

Rey gave an awkward smile with far too much teeth before raising a bandaged hand and pointing at it with her good one. The silence in the room quickly melted into conversation and calls from section leaders to “please, for the love of God, focus.”

Rey looked to the corner where Finn and Rose were standing among the chairs, probably trying to decide if they should go home or not. She started for them when red hair and a pale sneer stepped in front of her.

“Niima,” Hux hissed out at her, his pale pink lips curled into a scowl. She looked over at him, already at the end of her fuse for the day. “Would you do me a favor and try not to distract my section every chance you get?”

He wore a smile and his words were dipped in sugar, yet the bitter vitriol couldn’t be missed. Rey wished she had a witty retort ready, but the day had already been too eventful and her bite was significantly weakened. Which is why when she replied it came out as:

“Yeah, whatever,” she moved past him only for his hand to clamp down around her wrist, his fingers brushing the scent gland beneath her sleeve. Rey tried to shrug him off, but his grip tightened. He pulled her arm close to his face, his nostrils flaring. Watery eyes snapped to her face a knowing smile pressed to his lips. “What an interesting scent you have, Niima.”

“I make it myself,” she snatched her hand away, pulling it to her chest. She felt the overwhelming need to hiss at him, to spit in his face and put as much distance between her and his slimy grin as possible. “You know if you want Omega perfume that bad you can buy it on the dark web.”

“Not anything like that,” he said, taking a step back. Rey didn’t stay long enough to hear him say anything else. She was off across the room to Finn and Rose.

“Are you okay? Your cello is covered in blood!” Rose said, her arms already reaching out to bring Rey in.

“I’m fine,” Rey said but could barely hear herself over the pair of string players.

“Yeah what was that, I could hear yelling from in here,” Finn said.

“Like did you dump him? I know you weren’t together but did you like life dump him?” Rose spit out at a mile a minute.

“Cause if he’s yelling that’s totally not cool, Rey.”

“Like did you obliterate-his-existence kind of social dumping?”

“You don’t need that kind of Alpha bullshit.”

“Because he deserves-”

“Guys!” Rey snapped, quieting both of them. “I’ll tell you later, but can we- right now can we just play?”

Rose and Finn looked at each other.

“Please?” she begged, wanting the rest of the afternoon to some what resemble normalcy.

The door slammed open and Ben Solo walked in.

“Why is no one playing?” he seethed out at the entire group. That was… one way to make an entrance. Rey could feel the sudden tension in the room like a heavy scarf around her neck. She saw Hux scrambling to get his instrument and the woodwinds were all trying to start their piece together without anyone guiding them. Ben strolled through the madness towards the quartet.

“Are we ready?” he smiled, giving Rey a knowing look. Finn and Rose nearly broke their necks to look at her, eyebrows raised to the ceiling.

“I believe we are, Mr. Solo.”

For the first time in a long time they actually rehearsed. Ben didn’t stop her every two measures to snap at her, and Rey didn’t feel like she was suffocating anymore. Her fingers still tingled, pain making her knuckles itch as she pressed down on the strings, but it was a familiar pain. The same ache she felt in school after long practices. A pain she could manage, a pain that meant she was getting better.

And they sounded good. After a week of disappointments, it was calming to hear the notes hit just right as each person added their own sound.

They ended the day with smiles. All four of them high off of an accomplished rehearsal. Holdo would be pleased to hear that after a couple of false starts that the quartet she’d put together was worth showing off.

Rey wrestled her cello into its case and Rose leaned over her chair.

“So drinks?” she whispered. The thought of drinking again made her gag. She’d spent most of the day nursing a hangover and she wasn’t keen on spending her Saturday the same way. Rose, seemingly always ready to get hammered, changed tactics. “Okay, dinner? I just need to know everything.”

“Maybe it’s none of your business,” Rey smiled, and Rose’s bow was at her neck as if it were a blade.

“Rey, don’t do this to me.”

Rey laughed, a genuine sound that came all the way from her gut. She looked up to assure her friend and met eyes with Ben. His binder was under his arm, his violin already in its case and yet he lingered. His lips were pressed into the barest of smiles and his eyes were so warm and inviting.

Rose pressed her bow harder into Rey’s throat.

“Rey, please!” she begged, her playful jabbing becoming whining. Ben tapped his fingers on his binder before turning to the door. Sandalwood hung in the air. “Rey!”

“Christ, Rose we can go to dinner!” Rey said, shoving the bow away from her neck and tossing her binder into her case.

“Can Poe come?” Finn asked, his eyes hopeful but his voice betraying his worry.

“Is it okay if this is a no Alphas allowed meeting?” Rey asked. She didn’t want to hurt Finn and she knew how much he cared for Poe. However, Poe seemed to carry problems with him, and Rey needed a weekend clear of any kind of problems.

“No, for sure,” Finn said, as if expecting the answer. “But I do want to hear everything.”

Despite herself, Rey was three margaritas in before the sun went down. Slumped into the corner of the red vinyl booth, Rey propped her chin up on one hand and used the other wave a mozzarella stick around.

“So, it’s just a bit miscommunication,” she said, waving her fried cheese at the waiter. She wondered how many margaritas she could order in a family friendly establishment before they cut her off.

“Wow,” Finn said around a mouthful of cheese fries. He’d been hooked on every last word. “So, he really does care about you.”

He had a lazy drunk smile on his lips. Rey recognized it, she felt it on her own face.

“You’re both Alpha sick,” Rose groaned. She sucked at a pretty frozen drink Rey didn’t hear her order but desperately wanted a sip of. “I don’t know if I’d call that romantic.”

“But I see it, I get it,” Finn said, pleasant and bubbly from a single margarita. “He said some dumb shit, yeah, but I see the goodness behind it all.”

“You’re ridiculous,” Rose snapped, chewing on her straw.

“You don’t get it Rose, you don’t like Alphas,” he said, shooting a glare her way. “Alphas, they make you feel safe. They can be misguided but it always comes from a good place.”

“Yeah no I’ve watched all the movies too. Misguided is an understatement,” Rose said with an eyeroll. She turned on Rey. “So, what are you going to do now?”

Rey blinked before shoving a mozzarella stick into her mouth.

“God, Rey, really?” Rose whined.

“Sorry!” The word was gibberish between all the cheese in her mouth. She swallowed it and focused all her sober thoughts on appearing sincere. “If anything happens- and we don’t know if it will- I’m going to take things slow. There were… special circumstances last time but now I want a fresh start. You know go on a date to a movie or something.”

“You can do all kinds of things in a movie theater,” Finn smiled, raising his eyebrows at them. Rose screamed and threw a wad of napkins at him across the table.

Their long-suffering waiter appeared with the checks and Rey slipped a hand into her pocket to find it empty.

“Son of a bitch!”

“What?” Rose asked.

“I left my card at the bar. Fuck.” Rey groaned, throwing her hands over her face. She was going to swing by after rehearsal, but she’d completely forgotten. The entire day had felt like an eternity. Had they been out just last night?

“I’ll spot you,” Finn said with a wink, reaching over to grab her receipt.

“Thank you Finn I owe you one,” Rey said. Shame didn’t mix well with the tequila in her stomach. She spent so much of her life relying on others that having to do it again felt like a slap to the face. All the dinners in college sitting quietly with a water while everyone else talked about the Europe trips they were planning. She’d worked so hard to not have to ask for anything and here she was relying on a friend again. “I can’t believe I forgot about it. Do you think I can get it tonight?”

“Maz’s is going to be packed right now,” Rose said, and while the words meant to deter Rey she was obviously thinking about swinging by herself.

“Your card isn’t at Maz’s, don’t bother,” Finn said, calmly scribbling the tip down on the slip of paper.

“Excuse me?”

“Solo has your card,” he smiled. Rose looked like she might lurch across the table and strangle him.

“Fucking how?” Rey’s mind was working double time trying to figure how the hell that happened. Yet as the question left her lips, she remembered the figure guiding her to Finn’s car, the comforting tone of his voice.

“Guess his Alpha senses were tingling,” Finn grinned, taking a final sip of his drink. “Shall we?”

They walked to the parking lot, Rose verbally beating Finn for not telling them about Ben sooner. She had a lot of choice words to say about Rey being an independent woman- which she was- who could handle herself in a bar- which she could, most of the time.

“Hey, do you need me to call you an Uber?” Finn asked, shoving a rather feisty Rose into his passenger seat.

“No, I got it,” Rey said, sliding the app open. Her mouth still felt numb and she was too tired to think about driving. It’d cost another trip in the morning too, but she was willing to pay it.

“Oh, and by the way, don’t tell Solo I told you about last night,” Finn whispered, trying to hide the conversation from Rose.

“My lips are sealed.”

Finn slipped into his car and Rey waved to them as they pulled out onto the street. She leaned against her car, her only company the orange hued streetlamp that flickered over the parking spots. She looked at the little cars crawling across the map. Only fifteen minutes to her apartment. She could get home, drinks some water and take a painkiller. She could sleep in, take a long shower. She could go grocery shopping, make herself a healthy lunch, maybe even meal prep for the week. She had a novel on her bedside table that she only had five chapters left in, she could definitely finish it and even grab a new book to read.

She could do all of that.

Instead she closed the app and opened her contacts. She didn’t even hesitate before tapping on Ben Solo’s name.

Chapter Text

She sat cross legged on her trunk, switching between apps on her phone as the long painful minutes ticked by. It was a terrible idea, but that didn’t mean she didn’t want it. When the sleek black car pulled into the parking lot Rey had to restrain herself from immediately running over to it. Instead she watched him park beside her and unfold himself from the driver’s seat. He had changed out of his clothes from rehearsal. He had shed the button up and slacks for jeans and a black t-shirt. She wondered if he had finally gone home after sleeping in his office or if he was still avoiding her smell. Surely not anymore.

His boots crunched the gravel as he walked over and leaned against her car. His hair was damp. Had he jumped out of a shower to take her call?

“Where to, miss?” he asked, his lips pulling into a grin just large enough to show off his teeth. His presence was immediately calming. Her fidgeting hands had stopped, her thoughts crashing to a halt and she felt at peace.

“My place,” she grinned. She didn’t even realize she was leaning towards him until he chuckled and she could feel his breath on her cheek.

“And where is that?” he asked.

Rey gawked. It’s so odd to think about a person nearly every moment of every day and for them to not know where you live. Especially when said person has literally been inside of you.

“Oh, shit,” she finally sputtered out, before reaching out her hand. “Give me your phone I can put it into the map.”

Ben froze, his shoulders tensed as tight as rock.

“Uh, yeah,” he said, fighting against his own rigid muscles to pull out his phone. He tilted it away from and opened the map app before, reluctantly, handing the device over to her.

Rey raised an eyebrow at him but took the phone and squinted into the bright light of the screen. He had a new model with a larger screen, and it felt unruly in her hands. She awkwardly typed out the address, deleting more than a few typos and retyping it out before finally handing it back to Ben.

“That’s a shady part of town- not that it matters I’m just-,” Ben said, examining the address. Rey might have been offended but after seeing Ben’s apartment by comparison she did live in a shit part of town. She put an end to his babbling.

“I’m a shady lady,” she said instead smiling like a fool and sliding off her trunk. She hated how easily she felt like forgiving him. Was it the drinks or was it the hormones? She wasn’t even in heat and she could feel herself acting like a teenage girl drooling after an Alpha at a football game.

Not that she had any personal experience with that.

Ben seemed relieved that she cut him off and he dipped into a bow, motioning to his car.

“Your chariot awaits.”

“Thank you, kind sir,” Rey giggled. She froze, fumbling for her keys in her pocket. “Oh, but can we grab my cello.”

“Of course,” he said. Rey unlocked her car and threw open the door to the backseat. Ben reached in with one hand and grabbed the case, throwing the strap over his shoulder. “You know, you really shouldn’t leave it in your car for any amount of time. You’re lucky it’s cool outside, if left in the heat it could crack the varnish and melt the glue.”

“Yes, Mr. Solo.” Rey snorted, giving him a glare. Maybe it was a trick of the light, but she could have sworn his cheeks went pink.

“Sorry, I don’t mean to lecture,” he said, carrying her cello to his car and sliding it into the backseat. Rey shut her back door with her hip, crossing over to meet him. “Bad habit I suppose.”

Rey leaned against the car door, looking over the top as he emerged from the back seat. His black t-shirt had shifted, exposing a slip of hip bone before he fixed it. He stood up and looked down at her.

“I bet you can think of better things to lecture me about,” Rey said. Subtlety was never her strong suit, and especially not when she was tipsy. Ben opened his mouth, but he stopped chuckling and then shut the door she had been leaning on. She wavered but regained her balance.

“Let’s head out.”

Rey, if a bit disappointed she couldn’t coax her Alpha to jump her bones immediately, slipped into the passenger’s seat. Ben sat behind the wheel, putting his phone between them as the car came to life and the directions connected to his speakers.

“Turn right onto 2nd Avenue,” the female voice chimed.

“If you go left, I know a shortcut,” Rey said, grabbing his phone from the middle console to change the route.

“Wait I-” Ben reached across the car, his fingers on hers but a second too late. She tapped the empty black glass and his wallpaper filled the screen.

It was Rey.

It wasn’t her official headshot with the orchestra or even an image of her Instagram. It must have been from during her heat because she was in Ben’s bed. Her hair was a mess, her cheeks flush, and she was dead asleep.

Rey turned to him, holding up the picture her mouth hanging open.

“Oh my god,” she said, laughing while Ben curled away into the farthest corner of the car. “I don’t know if this is creepy or adorable but I’m very flattered.”

“I didn’t think- I don’t mean it in a-” he started babbling again before taking a deep breath and finally looking over at her. “You looked gorgeous and safe and I wanted a reminder that I could make you feel that way.”

“That… is kind of adorable,” Rey said, handing his phone back over the console. It was very apparent that they both had been thinking a lot this past week and it was going to take more than a single car ride to unpack all of it.

Ben stayed quiet the rest of the way to her apartment. Rey nearly nodded off staring out the window. He pulled up into a parking space and threw the gear into park and looked over at her. His hands placed, safely, on his knees. Rey could feel the engine humming beneath her feet.

They looked over at each other, the blue glow of the dashboard casting shadows across the hollows of his cheeks. Rey bit her lip before finally speaking the thought that was consuming her mind.

“Would you like to come up?” The second she said it regret flooded her stomach. Did he think her too forward? Just that morning they had been yelling at one another, this was a rather quick turnaround.

“W-would you like me to?” he asked, his fingers gripping his knees. Rey looked down at the floorboard like she was a tween asking someone to a dance for the first time. Suck it up and talk Rey she thought the man has been inside of you for fuck’s sake.

“I would.” She glanced up and saw a hint of a smile before he turned off the ignition and they were in darkness again.

They climbed the stairs in silence. Ben carried her cello which she was grateful for. After last night and the full day she’d had, Rey was afraid she might tumble down the stairs with the extra weight. They reached her apartment and she pulled her key out before freezing.

Ben Solo had never seen her apartment and if he wasn’t fond of the neighborhood she lived in he certainly would not be ready for her actual house.

“Okay so,” she said, turning around. His jaw tensed, his hands suddenly sliding into his pockets as if to contain them.

“It’s alright,” he sighed. “I understand.”

“No, you don’t-” she began. How could he understand her shit hole apartment without her saying anything? Was her neighborhood really that bad? Honestly, it was like any other street in Jakku. Maybe Solo was a lot prissier than she thought.

“No, I do,” he moved her cello off his shoulder and placed it beside her door. “I hope you have a good weekend.”

He started for the stairs and Rey was so baffled by it she nearly let him. However, she caught herself and grabbed his wrist before he could escape.

“Dude- what- no, no- I want you to come in,” she said, stumbling over herself. His skin was warm under her fingers and even though she didn’t need to keep a hold on him to halt his progress she let her hand linger anyway.

“Oh, I thought-”

“No, I wanted to tell you my apartment is a fucking mess,” she said.

“Oh.” His cheeks were beet red. “I thought-”

“Stop preparing for the worst and just exist,” she said with a smile. Rey wasn’t sure if she’d heard that from a movie or if the margaritas had just given her a lot more wisdom than usual. She tugged on his wrist and guiding him back to her door. He followed, keeping a safe distance between them, letting his arm hang by his fingers. His eyes, however, never left her face.

“I just don’t want to be… rash,” he said.

He thought assuming he could come to an apartment he had been explicitly invited into was rash after this week?

“Okay, but for real, it’s a studio and after seeing your place I’m not sure if you’re ready for a studio apartment,” she said.

“Rey, I’ve lived in a studio apartment.”

“Not like this one.”

“Rey-”

“Okay, but don’t say I didn’t warn you,” Rey turned and slipped her key into the lock. She threw open her door, exposing her most intimate living space to another pair of eyes.

She was suddenly aware of the many chores she had neglected this week. The sink was full of dishes and dirty laundry was laying around just about everywhere. Rey jumped forward, grabbing the various pants and bras off her couch as if she could hide the complete disaster that was her home. After the clean stark lines of Solo’s apartment there was no way he was ready to face the fuzzy rugs and string lights of her very cheap, very fresh out of college dwelling.

She heard Ben shut the door behind her and she looked up expecting him to have fled. Instead he stood on her welcome mat, her cello in hand, taking in the place.

“It’s… quaint.” He was trying so hard. Bless his soul.

Rey tossed a ball of laundry at the already overflowing hamper, the whicker vomiting socks and t-shirts onto the floor around it.

“It’s okay, you can tell me what you think. I won’t kick you out,” she said, sitting on the arm of the couch. After crossing the threshold her body was starting to crash. She’d been awake since the early morning and had stayed up late drinking again. She tried to blink away the exhaustion settling over her body. She had a beautiful Alpha in her apartment, and she was under no circumstances sending him home.

“It’s small,” he said, his eyes focused on the corner she had curtained off to form a bedroom. “Where do you do laundry? I don’t see room for a washer.”

“I go to a laundromat,” she said.

“A what?” He looked so surprised Rey started laughing. “Like with the coins and everything?”

“Yes!” she giggled. “What’s wrong with that?”

“No, no, you’re going to come over to my place. I have a nice little set up you can iron and everything,” he said. He crossed over, sitting on the opposite end of the couch from where she was perched.

“Ben Solo, do I look like someone who irons their clothes?” she laughed.

“No,” he smiled, running a hand through his hair. “But there’s always time to learn.”

Their gazes snagged and they looked at each other. It was strange to share a moment that was so domestic. No heat, no rut, but also no noisy flute players staring at them. It was just Rey and Ben and all the promise and anxiety that came with it.

“I’m so fucking tired.” She didn’t mean to say it out loud, but it was already out. Ben chuckled.

“I bet,” he said. His smile disappeared but he didn’t look disappointed or upset. “Do you want me to go?”

“No.” The word left her lips almost immediately. Ben shifted, moving across the cushions closer to her. She was still perched on the arm of the couch and yet it only brought her up to eye level with him.

“What do you want me to do?” His voice dripped with low Alpha tones that sent a shiver down Rey’s spine.

“Well, uhhh, a lot of things,” she mumbled, high off his smell and the pure giddiness of being around her Alpha.

“Just think about what you want right now.” His voice was dangerously low.

Rey closed her eyes. She wanted Ben to grab her and fuck her on her couch right then and there, but she was so exhausted she would probably fall asleep in the middle of it and that was not a good look. Now that he was there with her, it felt like they had an eternity to talk. He wasn’t going anywhere, she didn’t have to jump his bones to keep him in her apartment. She opened one eye, peering over at him.

“I want to go to bed and sleep… but I want you to come with me,” she said. Rey thought it sounded childish especially after their history of bedroom activities. If Ben thought so he didn’t vocalize it.

“Of course.”

She led him to her sad excuse for a bedroom and had him wait on the other side of the curtain while she stripped out of her day clothes and pulled on the cleanest pajamas she could find on the floor. She poked her head out of the curtains, showing off the meticulously planned outfit of yoga capris and an oversized t-shirt that said Cello, nice to meet you!

“I’m decent,” she said, as if he hadn’t already seen every inch of her. “I’m sorry I don’t have anything for you to change into.”

“I’ll make do,” he said, leaning against the couch and pulling off his boots. “As long you mind me being a little less decent.”

“Never,” she smiled. He crossed over, stepping into her bedroom. Rey quickly stepped out into the living room. “Your turn.”

She heard a chuckle from behind the curtain that was soon followed by the jingle of his belt as it was undone. After a few moments he parted the curtains again.

“Are you ready?” He only wore his t-shirt and boxers now which, compared to their last night together, was rather tame. However, it still made Rey’s heart flop over inside of her chest. God, it was all so sweet. Like a hallmark movie shoved inside of a cupcake.

She ran past him, throwing herself onto the bed and slipping under the covers before he had a chance to follow her. She pulled the comforter up to her nose, the tension in her back melting away as her body settled into the mattress.

“Where’s your phone?” he asked. “We should charge it.”

“In my pants.” Her voice was muffled by the blanket. She closed her eyes, listening to him walk around the space and shimmy her phone of her pants pocket. The phone buzzed twice when he plugged it in.

“Do you need any alarms for tomorrow?” His voice was soft. Not the luxurious smoky voice of an Alpha ready to fuck, but something else. Like honey. Sweet and warm.

“Uh-uh,” she mumbled, her eyes closed.

The mattress dipped as Ben got in, the blanket pulled taunt as he got underneath it. Then he was beside her, warm and solid. An arm draped over her waist holding her. She snuggled closer, hiding her face against his chest and listening to his heartbeat. His scent was strong, but it didn’t make her want to rip his clothes off. It made her muscles relax and sleep sweep over her even faster.

Was there a safer place than in the arms of an Alpha?

“Good night,” he muttered into her hair.

But she was already asleep.

Chapter Text

“Rey?”

She wiggled deeper into the blankets. A hand brushed her hair from her face, and she mumbled as the warmth from their fingers sunk into her skin.

“Rey, wake up.”

She blinked looking up at Ben Solo. He was sitting on the edge of her bed, his hair a little ruffled. He was smiling at her and she wondered if she was dreaming.

But it was real. All of it. She’d slept in his arms and now she got to wake up to him.

“Good morning,” she muttered, smiling and stretching under the sheets.

“I made breakfast,” he said, jumping up from her bed and disappearing behind the curtain again. Rey could smell something cooking and she had a moment of panic.

“With what?” she called to the other side of the apartment. She had not been to the store in a while and as far as she knew everything in her fridge was either spoiled, take out, or spoiled take out. Ben appeared at the foot of the bed again holding a large plate laden with scrambled eggs, sausages, pancakes, fruit and who knows what else.

“I had to go to the store anyway because the only coffee you have is cinnamon roll flavored and that is a war crime. So, I picked up some essentials as well. I hope that’s okay,” he stood awkwardly with the plate, suddenly unsure of his offering was acceptable. “I didn’t mean to overstep-”

“No, no you’re fine,” Rey said, sitting up in bed as the smell of all the food hit her. “I feel bad for asking you to stay over without any food.”

“Don’t worry about it.” He smiled before slipping into bed with her, setting the plate down. Up close she could see there was also bacon shoved on the plate, as well as little dots inside of the pancakes. She poked one with her finger. “They’re blueberries.”

“Mmmm blueberries are my-”

“Your favorite,” he finished for her. Rey looked up at him and her cheeks went pink. He remembered one off thing she’d muttered through a mouthful of muffin. He’d gone to the store and bought a nonsensical amount of food just to make sure she woke up to a sturdy meal.

“No one has made me blueberry pancakes before,” she said, emotion welling up in her throat. She didn’t mean to sound so sad, but it was true. They don’t make foster kids pancakes with fresh fruit. She was lucky if she got a frozen waffle every now and then. She pressed her finger to her eye trying to wipe away moisture that was gathering before it fell.

“I’ll make them for you everyday if you want.” His voice was low and smooth, his arm wrapping around her shoulder to hold her close to him. She laughed, hiding her face behind her fingers. She chanced a look at him. People tended to pity her when she revealed too much of her past, so she tried not to mention it. However, Ben’s eyes weren’t full of pity but of promise. Rey bit her lip, her chest fluttering at the idea of Ben being around to make her pancakes every single day. He squeezed her shoulder and nudged the plate closer to her. “Eat up.”

“Okay, but I can’t eat all of this. You have to help me,” Rey said, distressed with the sheer amount of food before her. Ben laughed, reaching over and plucking a blueberry from the top of the pancake pile and popping it into his mouth.

They ate together. Rey focused almost entirely on the pancakes until Ben waved bacon in front of her tempting her to take a bite. They ate until they were both full. Ben took the plate away and came back with coffee, his black and her cup cinnamon roll flavored. Rey took a sip before putting her mug aside and snuggling up to Ben. She laid her head on his chest, her arm wrapped around his waist.

She wasn’t exhausted, she wasn’t in heat. Rey was completely and utterly present. It made every brush of his hand and curl of their fingers together feel electric. There was no urgency, just lazy affection.

She loved every second of it.

They laid in bed for at least an hour, sipping coffee and holding each other. Ben ran his fingers through her hair, twisting brown waves around his fingers. She closed her eyes, listening to his heartbeat and enjoying being engulfed in his smell.

She propped her chin up on his chest looking up at him. He peered down at her with a small smile that made her heart melt.

“Would you like to go on a date with me?” Rey asked, her cheeks warm.

“A date?” he echoed, shifting beneath her. One dark eyebrow raised.

“Yeah, like to dinner or something tonight,” she said, biting on her lower lip. Maybe it was an odd thing to suggest after everything that had happened? What was the post-heat protocol? Or rather the post-heat misunderstanding protocol?

“I think that’s a great idea,” he said. “Honestly, I feel bad for not being the one to suggest it.”

“It’s okay, you can make it up to me by paying,” she winked and rolled off him. She grabbed her phone off the nightstand and nearly sighed in relief that no messages were waiting for her.

“I’m not sure what I can get tonight,” Ben mumbled. She looked over and he seemed deep in thought, his own phone open.

“Get what?”

“A reservation.”

“We don’t need one of those,” Rey laughed. He looked over his shoulder at her and he seemed extremely serious. “Ben…”

“I want to take you somewhere nice, Rey,” he dropped his phone, leaning beside her and taking her face in his hands. “I want to do it right this time.”

“Ben, really I’ll feel more comfortable with something more… casual. How about dinner and a movie?” Rey smiled at him. In truth she had nothing to wear to any kind of restaurant that took reservations. That wasn’t entirely true, she had a single black dress for performances, but she couldn’t risk taking it out anywhere with a concert coming up. However, looking at Ben told her that if she mentioned it, he’d already be ready to drag her to a department store and buy her something. She didn’t want him to shower her with gifts, and she certainly didn’t want to go to some stuffy place for dinner where she’d have to guess which fork to use. She just wanted to spend time with him, and Rey did better with low stakes.

“Yeah, yeah you’re right,” he said, nodding but it was clear that gears were already turning. “How about we grab your car and then I’ll head home and get cleaned up and I can come pick you up.”

He seemed so excited Rey had to stifle a giggle.

“You know, like a proper gentleman,” he finished.

“I’d like that.”

“Amazing.” He smiled before leaning in and pressing his lips to hers. Rey melted into his touch. It was a slow, gentle kiss and was done as soon as it began. He hopped out of bed gathering his things and Rey brought her fingers to her lips.

They hadn’t kissed since her heat. Even last night, they’d kept their lips to themselves. It felt like her first kiss all over again. Giddy and new and delicious.

They parted ways and Rey drove back home. She spent the afternoon cleaning her apartment which mainly consisted of deciding which laundry could be worn again and what was unsalvageable. The kitchen, however, was immaculate. Ben had done all the dishes, and even wiped down the counters that morning.

Rey put on music and threw clothes into separate piles. She managed to find a clean skirt and t-shirt to wear that night. They had decided on dinner at a little café near the cinema and then a new horror movie that had come out a few weeks prior- Killer Omegas From the Outer Reaches. Rey had picked the movie, it seems wonderfully trashy and fun and something Ben would not have seen on his own.

She took a shower and spent far too much time glaring into the bathroom mirror and sorting through her makeup. Half of it was expired, not that the printed dates ever stopped her. She swiped on mascara and rubbed some shimmery bronze shadow onto her eyelids.

Cute and carefree, that’s what she wanted to go for. But also, the temptation to wear blood red lipstick was too much and she slipped it on. Then, of course, she put on some eyeliner to match it and by the end she had a full face of makeup. Cute, still carefree… just with a little more maintenance.

It was a first date; she was allowed to be prissy.

She slipped on her chosen clothes, tucking the dark gray t-shirt into her skirt. She then proceeded to try every pair of shoes she owned until she ended up in the pair she wore every day. They had a rugged kind of charm to them, and they were comfortable, and Rey prized comfort over almost everything else.

She looked in the mirror for a moment, admiring herself and feeling actually nervous. It felt silly, Ben Solo had slept over the night before. They’d spent the better part of the morning entangled with one another. They’d already slept together! Should you be nervous around someone who had already seen your butthole?

The thought made her cringe. If only they hadn’t gone about this all backwards, but they didn’t have much of a choice in the matter.

She wondered, if she’d never triggered a rut would their relationship ever move past disgruntle co-workers? Would she still be calling him an ass at drinks with Rose, avoiding his gaze and convincing Finn to ask him for new bow strings lest she incur his wrath?

Would she have ever felt as happy as she did now if she didn’t go into heat in Solo’s office?

Her phone buzzed and she snapped to the present. He was outside. Rey was already smiling like an idiot as she turned off all the lights and grabbed her keys. She took the steps outside two at a time. He was in the parking lot, standing beside his car dressed surprisingly casual. She was half expecting him to show up in slacks or khakis, but he stood in jeans and a nice red sweater. His hair had been redone and his smell was clear and pure.

God, his smell.

She could smell it before she reached him. Thick Alpha tones that washed over and made her dizzy. Not the synthetic kind Alphas in clubs would bathe in, but the all-natural kind that made her toes curl and chest flush.

“Good evening, Miss Niima,” he smiled, opening the passenger side door.

“Good evening, Mr. Solo.” Rey slid into the seat; her knees glued together while she tried to control her unruly body. His car smelled like him, like behind held by a soothing Alpha candle. He got in on the driver’s side and gave her a smile before throwing the car into gear and starting off towards their date.

She twisted her fingers in her lap, the same fresh nerves flooding through her again. Why did he make her feel so anxious? Her stomach felt like it was full of bees and her face was hot enough to run a fever.

Or is that what affection for another person feels like?

They pulled up to the café and Rey took the chance to get fresh air into her lungs lest her brain be completely drowned in thoughts of Ben Solo. The café wasn’t anything nice, just a simple counter to order at and chairs to sit and talk. Ben held the door open for her and Rey couldn’t help but feel like she’d fallen into one of those cheesy romance novels. The ones where everything is movie perfect with a touch of blush on everyone’s cheeks and everybody laughs like bells tinkling.

She wished she’d looked up the menu before hand but quickly scanned the board behind the cashier.

They ordered coffee and sandwiches and took a seat by a window.

“So, do you know anything about the movie we’re seeing?” Ben asked. He fiddled with his phone, turning it around in his hands over and over again.

“Oh yeah, it’s like a slasher horror thing,” Rey said.

“Is it good?” He seemed hesitant but earnest.

“Almost definitely not.” They both laughed. “It’s not supposed to be good. It’s supposed to be fun and bloody and sexy but in a weird way.”

“A weird way?” Ben asked, eyebrows to the sky. He leaned back in his chair, a smile on his face as if he was just happy to listen to her talk about it.

“You know what I mean! Like have you seen The 200ft Alpha?” Rey asked, leaning against the table.

“No!” he laughed.

“Oh my god what?! I thought everyone had seen that movie! It’s a classic!” Rey exclaimed.

“I’ve seen classics and that does not sound like a classic,” Ben replied.

“No, it is! It’s a woman Alpha who gets blown up to a thousand feet tall-” Rey began.

“I thought it was two hundred feet?” he interjected.

“Yeah, they say a couple numbers and none of them match- but she gets blown up and she tears through a city looking for men to eat in order to sate her unbearable hunger!” Rey said just as a wary teenager came to their tabled with their sandwiches.

“Uh order number 52?” the boy croaked, giving her a cautious look.

“Yeah, that’s us.” Ben was having far too much fun while Rey was hiding behind her hands, trying to disguise the deep red her face had turned. They were both pretty hungry and ate quickly. They had some time before the movie and sipped coffee while Rey detailed more terrible horror movies that she was sure prodigy Ben Solo was never allowed to watch.

A plus to not having parents, is that they didn’t police your media consumption.

They finished up and walked the short distance to the theatre. On the way they bumped hands, Ben’s pinky finger curling around Rey’s. She wanted to scream for joy but simply smiled and held onto his hand as they slowly made their way to the ticket counter.

This was a real date, had she ever been on one like this before?

Ben paid for the tickets and they slipped into the theatre taking two seats in the back row. They shifted the arm rest between them up and Rey snuggled against him as if it was second nature. Was she still nervous? Of course, but the desire to be close to him overcame her nerves. His arm was around her shoulders holding her against him. She took in slow deep breaths as the previews played, letting the Alpha tones settle her anxieties.

She was safe, she was with Alpha.

The lights dimmed further, and the title screen came to life.

She snuggled closer, her Omega mind still echoing. Alpha is here.

The movie opened on a park in Los Angeles somewhere. Extras in vaguely 1950s clothing walked aimlessly across the grass. A man and woman were having a picnic, fake laughing and feeding each other strawberries when a spaceship crashed beside them. In the fog and fire a door slid open revealing actors in skimpy silver costumes and painted teal skin.

Alpha will take care of you.

Rey rubbed her knees together, trying to ease the fire building between her legs.

“What do you want?” the picnicking man cried; the barrel of a phaser held to his forehead. The aliens shrieked with laughter.

“We want Alphas!” the Omega shrieked before pulling the trigger and melting the man’s flesh to the skull.

Let Alpha take care of you.

Rey bit her lip, her knees glued together as her whole body warmed up. She could feel herself growing wet. She shifted, trying to find a way to hold herself that may cool the want building within her. Ben stiffened beneath her.

She froze. He leaned down his lips beside her ear.

“Is this what you meant by weirdly sexual?” he teased, his voice low dripping with the Alpha tone that made her whole body turn to jello. She shivered. His arm squeezed her shoulder, pressing her close to his side, as his other hand leaned over to skim across her thigh.

Her breath hitched. She looked up at him, his face illuminated only by the flashing colors on screen. His eyes were hooded, his pupils wide. His fingers moved under her skirt, gripping her thigh and making her wiggle under his touch.

There was no pause, no question of whether they should or should not. His lips were already on hers, Rey’s hands already curled into the fabric of his sweater. His hand moved further up her skirt, thick fingers pressing against soaked panties. She gasped into his mouth and she could feel his reaction vibrate through his frame.

She wanted to moan, wanted to beg for more, but there were people a few rows down from them and they would certainly hear her.

His fingers started moving against her through the wet fabric, setting a pace that she matched her hips to. It was a slow rhythm, a testing of the waters. She could feel sweat on the nape of her neck as she pressed against his fingers, trying to reach her pleasure in silence.

He shifted, his fingers pulling away only to slip underneath her panties and press against hot flesh. She gasped and he caught her lips to contain the noise. She smiled against him, grinding against his hand.

Alpha will take care of you her inner Omega insisted- and she was right.

He pressed his forehead to her shoulder, and she could hear him panting as he worked against her clit before slipping a finger inside of her. She bit down on her hand, her chest rising and falling with each labored breath as he incited each new sensation. He slipped a second finger in, stretching her walls. She could feel her skin press against his hand, her own body fluttering around the intrusion as it filled it her up. But she needed more, she needed him. His scent spiked; she could smell it hanging in the air around her.

She moved her hand down, grabbing him through his jeans. His hips jerked and he looked up at with her a warning look.

“I want it,” she whispered. He kissed her then leaned his forehead against hers.

“Not here.”

She groaned and he caught her mouth again as if to shush her, his finger curling inside of her in retaliation as well.

“Please,” she muttered against his mouth, her voice strained as she rode his fingers. Something about being in public with Ben Solo’s fingers up her skirt made her even more desperate for him.

“After.” He panted, sliding his fingers in and out, but keeping his thumb on her clit rubbing faster and faster.

“The movie?” she whimpered. God, she didn’t want to sit through this movie anymore, not when she could have Solo’s cock inside of her.

He pressed his mouth to her ear so that his voice dripped straight into her mind.

“After I make you come.”

As if that wasn’t enough, Ben then pressed his lips to her throat and bit at the scent gland there. She gasped, the orgasm wrenching through her body as if he had summoned it with his words. Rey clung to his shoulders as she came around his fingers, biting back her praises and curses. They stayed frozen for a moment before Rey slumped back into her seat, sated.

But not completely.

Ben withdrew his finger, her pleasure evident on his skin. In the flicking light of the film, Rey could see her come dripping from his fingertips. She opened her mouth, ready to offer her shirt to wipe his hand clean when he pressed his fingers to his tongue and licked every drop from his hand.

She sat frozen for a moment, just watching him lick her juices from his fingers. He looked over at her, a devilish smile spread across his wet lips.

“Fuck me, let’s go,” Rey said at full volume, movie completely forgotten. Someone across the theatre shushed them, but there were already on the move down the stairs. Hand in hand they sprinted past the ticket taker and out into the night air. None of the workers seemed to notice the red lipstick marks smeared across Ben’s face.

Chapter Text

She slipped into the backseat of Ben’s car, her skirt catching on the leather seats and pulling it up to her hips. Rey didn’t mind, it wasn’t going to stay down for long. He followed right behind her, pressing his large frame into the car, his hips settling between her legs. He reached back, slamming the door closed. The night sounds of cars honking and crickets chirping were gone, what was left was their own labored breathing alone in the dim light of a streetlamp.

Their lips found each other immediately, swapping desperate kisses. Ben had one hand beside her head propping himself up and the other running up her thigh. His hands were so large, his fingers spread apart as if trying to feel as much of her as possible.

Of course, Rey already knew just how large Ben Solo was.

The thought of him inside of her was enough to make Rey abandon her kisses. She gave a frustrated noise and pulled away to tug at her t-shirt. She got it over her head and tossed it into the floorboard. Ben growled, his lips planting wet admiring kisses across her collarbone and along the tops of her breasts. His fingers slipping up her leg to press against her like in the theatre, her wet panties still standing guard.

Ben shifted, dipping his fingers under the fabric. Warm fingers worked her throbbing clit and Rey gasped. She bit down on her lip, she didn’t know who was walking around in the parking lot and she did not want to be caught in such a compromising position.

“Don’t,” Ben whispered, his cheek pressed against hers. His lips by her ear. “I want everyone to hear how loud I can make you scream.”

The words shot right through her threatening to push her over the edge again. His fingers sped up, forcing another gasp from her chest; the sound caught in her throat as her whole body trembled.

“Say my name.” Hi voice was low and gruff, typically Alpha but not in Alpha tones. Her toes curled and she arched against his hand. She needed more.

“Ben,” she moaned, his fingers pressing through the wetness to push inside of her his thumb still working the bundle of nerves.

“Louder,” he grunted, his hands growing rougher by the moment. She loved every jerk of his hand, every shudder of his shoulders. He was trying to play her, pressing his fingers against her like he would a violin. She would sing for him, but she’d play him right back.

“I want you,” she moaned, her fingers curling in his shirt dragging him close until their chests pressed together.

“You have me,” he said, his voice betraying the razor’s edge he balanced on. She could feel his control falter.

She wanted it to fail. She wanted to be consumed.

Her fingers grazed his chest, down his stomach to where his hips dipped into his jeans. Nimble fingers had his pants unbuttoned and the zipper down in a flash. She pressed her hand under the fabric and took him in her hand.

A choked gasp left his lips, his entire body rigid. She could hear the leather seats squeaking under his clenched fingers. He was frozen, deemed immobile by her hand wrapped around his cock. He was impossibly hard beneath her grasp. She smiled up at him, her hand working against his shaft.

“You know I wanted to last a little longer than this,” he forced out, looking away. She tugged on his length, her fingers sliding down hot skin. His hips jerked and he cursed. “You’re devilish, Niima.”

She liked watching him wriggle, struggling to contain himself. There was something irresistible about Ben trying to hold back his Alpha instincts, presumably for her own comfort. She wouldn’t help but tease it out of him and she wasn’t about to stop now. She pulled her hand away and his entire body fell against her, relieved.

She pressed against his shoulders pushing him back until he was seated with his back against the door. She kneeled on the leather in front of him, her fingers already hooked in his beltloops.

“Rey, I was trying to -,” he began. His face was covered in sweat, his chest rising and falling with each rapid breath. His words died on his tongue as she yanked his jeans over his hips.

“Trying to what?” she asked, halting her work for a moment to stare up at him. She leaned forward; her breasts displayed on a pedestal of pink lace. “Trying to make me come? Solo, we both know you’re very good at that.”

She kissed him, their lips moving slowly while her hands pushed his pants down his thighs. She smiled against his mouth as she pulled his briefs down as well. She took him in hand again and he moaned against her tongue.

“I want to make my Alpha come,” she said, and it was the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help her God. She started moved her hands, slowly, up and down his length. A tasting of what was to come. He growled. His hands hovered, wanting to pull her close but wary of disrupting her work. They found a home in her hair, holding her lips to his.

“You don’t have to,” he said. He was practically panting with each new stroke of his cock.

“Oh, but I want to.”

She kneeled between his legs and brought her lips to the head of his cock. She gave the tender flesh a soft kiss before dragging her tongue across it and sucking the pink head into her mouth. He jerked under her, his hands gripping the interior of the car around them if only for something to hold on to. She smiled. All come witness how the might Alpha falls apart in the hands of a tiny Omega.

Or rather, the mouth.

Rey looked up to find his dark eyes half closed but watching her. His mouth hung open and she couldn’t help but feel a thrill between her legs at the sight of her hungry Alpha. He licked his lips. She felt drunk off pheromones.

She pressed her tongue to his base and licked a line all the way to the head. He moaned; a deep sound she could feel vibrate in his body. She took him in her mouth. Her tongue lapped at his length as she pressed further on to him.

“God, Rey,” he gasped when she’d pressed him as far as she could, her throat straining against the intrusion. She knew he was a big but holding him in her mouth made it feel more real. She pulled back, his cock sliding out of her mouth with ease before quickly pressing back onto it. She could feel his knot begin to bloom at the base of his length.

Ben was a mess. His cheeks were flushed, his fingers curled around a plastic handle in the door that looked ready to break at any moment. Rey held onto his thighs, holding herself as she bobbed up and down on his cock. One of his hands found her hair, gently holding the back of her head as if guiding her on to him.

She looked up, her view full of lean muscle and broad shoulders. Ben had thrown his head back, exposing the tendons in his throat.

He was such a large man- a true Alpha in every meaning of the word. Rey, however, had a lot of experience handling large instruments.

“Rey,” he moaned, his hips lifting to meet her every stroke. “Rey, I can’t-”

His hand on her head pulled her back gently, pushing her away from her work just as she thought he was coming to a finale.

“Was I doing something wrong?” Rey asked, sitting up on her knees spit dribbling down her chin.

“No, no!” Ben said quickly taking her face in his hands and kissing her. She melted under his touch, greedy for more kisses from his plush lips. His hands caressed her neck and shoulders, reaching around her back to unhook her bra. The straps slumped down her shoulders and Ben quickly tossed it into the front seat.

He took her sore breasts, finally free from the confines of an overly padded push-up bra, in his hands. His fingers were a welcomed balm on the tender flesh, his large hands palming each breast, his thumb running over a perk nipple. She shuddered and he slipped the pink pub into his mouth sucking on it and sending yet another sharp demand between her legs. God, she needed him but she wanted to play with him first.

“If I’m going to come in this car,” he said, pressing a kiss the space between her breasts above her heart. He looked up; black curls hanging in his face and dark eyes hungry. “I’m going to do it inside of you.”

“Fuck,” Rey moaned, already climbing into his lap. All thoughts of devilish Omega games vanished. She pressed her knees on either side of his thighs positioning herself over his cock. She started to lower herself onto him.

“Shhh, slowly,” Ben said, quickly grabbing her hips to halt her progress. He moved his hips, pressing his swollen head against her clit before dragging himself to her opening. Slowly, he pressed her hips down. Just enough to feel the beginning of his entrance. Then he stopped.

“Ben,” she cried, smacking his chest. So eager for a knot she’d fallen into an Alpha’s trap. “Ben, please!”

“What do you need?” he asked. The muscles in his forearms were shaking, his cheeks still flushed with desire. His eyes were endlessly dark. The sight of him, so lost in pleasure, sent a thrill through her body. He was like this with her and her alone. Ben Solo was her Alpha and she’d beg for him every day of the week.

“I need my Alpha’s cock!” Rey cried, wrapping her arms around his neck her lips pressing frantic kisses along his throat. “I need you.”

He pressed her down, barely an inch inside of her. Her walls clenched on nothing.

“Ben!” she whined, pressing her forehead against his throat. She could feel his pulse beating, quick and loud, beneath his skin. “Alpha I need you!”

This time his hands barely pushed against her at all.

“Ben Solo if you don’t fuck me right this moment, I’m going to kill you!” Rey said through clenched teeth. He chuckled before pulling her down the rest of the way, impaling her on his cock.

All the air left her lungs, her body shuddering around him. His finger dug into the flesh of her hips holding himself still for a moment.

They were was no more banter, no more speech at all.

He flipped her around, pressing her back into the seats. Rey wrapped her legs around his waist, holding onto his shoulders as he began thrusting inside her.

They had teased each other to nearly the top of the mountain and now it was a race for the summit. Her nails scratched against the flesh of his shoulders as he bucked into her over and over again. She could feel the car shaking with each powerful pump of his hips and in that moment, she couldn’t care if anyone noticed them.

The only thing in the world right now was Ben Solo and his massive Alpha cock.

Rey came with his name on her tongue. She clung to him, pleasure trembling through her body. He gave one final thrust inside of her before grunting to competition.

She watched his face above her as he came. His eyes closed, his mouth open and his entire body shuddering with the force of it.

She could do that. She could make him feel so good he lost words. She could make him feel like an Alpha.

Her inner Omega was extremely proud.

His knot bloomed within her, pressing inside and filling her up. She forgot how good it felt to have an Alpha’s knot inside of you.

Ben caught his breath and they shifted, attempting to lay on their sides while still conjoined by his knot. He was too large to lay with her like that and quickly flipped them over so he was laid out and she lounged on top of him. Rey pressed her cheek against his chest, exhausted.

She had nothing on but her skirt that was hiked up to her waist. Ben still had his pants around his calves, and the rest of their clothes had been tossed across the car. Anyone could look inside and see Rey’s naked ass displayed very conveniently near a window.

As if reading her mind, Ben reached up and pulled her skirt down over her backside.

“I like the skirt,” he said, the exhaustion evident in his voice.

“Oh?” Rey asked, eyes half closed, her finger drawing designs against his skin.

“Perfect for an Omega on the go,” he said before slapping her ass. The blow had been playful, gentle but she couldn’t help but feel a thrill. Her walls clenched and she squeezed more seed from his knot. Ben did not fail to notice, moaning as the sensation came over him and then giving her a sleepy smile. “So, you like being spanked?”

Rey buried her face against his chest, trying to hide the blush that surely reached from her forehead down to her nipples.

“You could just ask, Niima. It’d be my pleasure to spank you.” His voice was silky and smooth. Like chocolate. Like the low notes on her cello that would vibrate through her frame.

She dragged her fingertip from one of his nipples to the other, admiring the broad plane of his chest. It was warm in the car, the windows cloudy with fog.

“You know I told myself we’d go slow,” she said, her finger still trailing across his skin. “But I’m not sure if that’s even possible.”

Ben shifted beneath her.

“Are you saying you didn’t want to…” He began and she could hear the hurt in his voice. She snapped her head up.

“Oh my God, no!” Of course, she wanted to fuck Ben. Despite her desire to start again a bit more carefully, it didn’t feel like they were ignoring one another’s mind to get their body. She loved his body, but she also liked his laugh and the way he watched her while she told a story. She liked cuddling and just being near him. And she loved his blueberry pancakes. “I just- I was trying to say that it’s nice to know that we can fuck like Alphas and Omegas do, but also have the, like, cute soft kind of stuff to.”

“Are you calling me soft?” he chuckled.

“Well, not right now,” she said, wiggling her hips. He groaned as she pressed on his knot, forcing another floor of come deep inside of her. She savored the extra heat, arching her back and giving a quiet moan. She felt impossibly full before and now she was simply euphoric. “Right now, you’re perfect.”

“You like that?” Ben asked, running his hands up her ribs to cup her breasts. Her walls clenched around him again and he jerked at the sensation. “Jesus, Rey holy shit.”

“What can I say? I like thick Alpha cock.” Usually lines like that felt so fake on her tongue but right now it was the truth. She felt beautiful and sexy with his hands on her breasts and his knot in her cunt.

“Come here.” He spoke with an Alpha authority and she immediately leaned down against him eager to comply. He pressed his mouth to the side of her neck, dragging his tongue over her scent gland. She shivered, gripping his shoulders as he kissed the tender flesh. “I want you to smell like me for months.”

Rey wanted to smell like him. She wanted everyone to know she’d been marked and exactly who had taken her. However, those were ancient Omega thoughts and she had some very real, modern problems.

“Wait,” she said, pulling away. “What about work?”

“What about it?” he said. A regular knot-brained Alpha.

“Can we go in on Monday reeking of each other? I didn’t read the handbook but can orchestra members even date?” Rey said, her hand worrying at the gland on her left wrist, the one Hux had grabbed he day prior.

“Of course, people can date!” He said.

“Can the Alpha Concertmaster date the first Omega in the company?” she said, frowning at him. Had he thought about this at all?

“Well, I say it is.” He said smiling up at her. “And if anyone has a problem, they can fuck off.”

She thought of Hux, nostrils flared, smelling exactly what her body had been through. She’d take one step into the rehearsal hall and he’d know the whole story. Hell, he was such a creep he’d probably identify which position they’d fucked in through scent alone.

However, there was nothing she could do about that now. Everyone knew he saw her through her heat, it was only natural this was next step right? If there were any issues it would have come up by now.

Yet, it was hard to imagine they’d get to continue fucking in movies and eating breakfast together. Happiness did not come easily for Rey Niima and she wasn’t used to feeling this good. But, she couldn’t go through life expecting the worse, not now when everything was falling into place.

“Okay, okay,” she said, sinking back against his chest.

They lounged lazily for another half an hour. Rey fell asleep on top of Ben and didn’t wake until he shifted her. His knot had finally gone down enough for them to part. He gently pulled himself out and she immediately mourned his absence. She felt hollow and empty without him filling her up.

They climbed through the car reassembling their outfits, with a few breaks for half naked kissing. Once they were decent, they stepped out of the backseat into the night air.

“Do you want to finish the movie?” he asked over the top of the car.

“Nah, I think that ship is sailed.” Rey said. She’d never had sex somewhere so public before and the realization was slowly dawning on her. Anyone could have found them- hell they could have been arrested. She wasn’t even in heat and she had needed him so desperately. It was a little scary.

She had never needed someone like that before, Alpha or otherwise.

“Would you like to come back to my place?” He was very cautious, each word coming out slowly as if expecting a rejection.

She smiled. He was trying to take it slow after they barreled through a stoplight, but she appreciated it anyway. They had their night out and that’s what she wanted. He’d been a lovely date- and that wasn’t taking into the account the car sex.

Rey looked at him, this giant successful Alpha who could have anyone or anything he ever wanted. And he wanted her to spend the night.

The hell with slow.

“I would love to.”

Chapter Text

Rey stood on the steps in front of Ben’s apartment as he fumbled getting his keys from his pocket. The light above the porch didn’t flicker like the lights at her own building. There was also a single bug bumping against the bulb whereas she had to fight hoards of moths whenever stepping out into the dark. Her eyes fell to the parking lot and she felt a tightness in her chest. She wanted to be here, but she couldn’t help but remember that this is where everything went wrong last time.

She took a breath. She wouldn’t let it capsize again. If they kept talking and stopped assuming they’d be okay.

Easier said than done.

She heard the door click open and the overwhelming scent of sandalwood and leather threatened to knock her over.

“M’lady,” he said awkwardly standing in the door frame to let her enter first even though he took up most of the available space.

“Don’t say that ever again,” she snorted before slipping past him to get into the apartment.

“I thought I was being chivalrous,” he laughed, closing the door behind them. The apartment was exactly how it was the last time she was there, and it made her stomach twist into a knot. She didn’t know what she expected. He couldn’t remodel his entire house to make sure she didn’t feel uncomfortable. She looked to the kitchen counter where the Chandrila Philharmonic Orchestra mugs hung from a display. She remembered the warm coffee in her hands and how his smile had stretched across his face. White sheets. Sunshine.

There was nothing to be afraid of here.

“Yeah, but it’s like a meme,” Rey said, dropping her phone and keys onto the couch.

“A meme?” he asked, tossing his keys next to hers.

“Ben Solo you know what a meme is, you’re not that old,” Rey said. She kicked off her shoes and sat on the back of the couch.

“Are you calling me old?” he asked.

“No, I specifically said you’re not old,” Rey said with a smile. “Besides 85 is quite young for a concertmaster of your degree.”

He laughed, crossing into the kitchen

“Coffee?” he asked, pulling a bag of grounds from a cabinet.

“I’m fine. If I drink any now, I’ll never sleep,” she said, picking at her skirt. Her “cute yet carefree” outfit she had pieced together earlier didn’t look so cute anymore. She didn’t bother tucking in her shirt and while the skirt looked nice, she had left her panties in Ben’s car- lost to the void of the floorboard.

“Oh, did you plan on sleeping?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at her. His dark eyes glimmered, his lips pulled into a slight smirk.

Rey’s whole body flashed with heat.

“Well, now I’m not,” she said, hopping to her feet. Ben smiled and returned to his work. Rey moved to a mirror set on the wall near the front door and nearly gasped when she saw herself.

“You’ve let me walk around looking like this?” she asked. Her hair was a ruffled mess, her eyeliner smudged below her eyes giving half racoon half teenager-did-this-on-purpose look. Her red lipstick she had dared to put on was faded and what was left of it was smeared. “I look diseased!”

“You look ravaged,” Ben said from the kitchen, casually pouring water into the coffee maker.

“Oh, and that’s a good thing?” Rey asked, licking her finger and trying to wipe away the eyeliner smeared underneath her eyes. It did little to help.

“If I’m completely honest, it makes me feel very accomplished,” Ben said smiling while flicking the coffee pot on. She looked at him, standing tall and proud. He was glowing with pure Alpha energy, a cocky grin stretched across his lips. She felt a thrill tumble through her stomach and Rey suddenly wondered if she could turn him into a moaning puddle of mush again.

She was wet at the mere thought.

“Omega’s Choice,” she said. He raised an eyebrow at her.

“What’s your choice?” he asked, stepping closer. Rey bit on her lower lip but didn’t falter. She wanted to see how far she could push him.

“Take off your clothes,” she spoke with the authority of an Alpha. She could see Ben’s chest moving with labored breath as he watched her. He kept his eyes on hers as he kicked off his shoes and pulled his sweater off, tossing it aside. His hands moved slowly as he unbuttoned his jeans and Rey bit back her smile. He stepped out of his pants and stood naked in his kitchen- a towering mass of pale Alpha muscle. Rey swallowed hard.

“Sit on the couch,” she demanded. He followed her orders, crossing into the living room. She followed him watching all the muscles flexing and moving in his legs as he walked. He sat on the couch, legs spread apart and arms across the back of it. He put himself on display, and he had quite the merchandise to show off.

What a tease.

Rey stood in front of him and pulled off her t-shirt, tossing it aside. His eyes trailed her body, dark eyes hungry, his cock standing at attention.

“I have one rule,” Rey said, wiggling her skirt over her hips and stepping out of it.

“Anything,” he said, obviously more interested in watching her hips move towards him than anything else.

“You’re not allowed to touch me,” she said with a devilish smile. He paused snapping his eyes back up to her.

“Is this a challenge?” he said. His pupils were wide, and his tongue slipped out to lick his lips.

“Yes,” Rey said, stepping between his legs. His arms twitched as if wanting to reach out for her, but he stopped himself. He sucked in air between his teeth.

“What do I get if I win?” he said, tilting his head back.

“Alpha’s Choice,” she said.

“Perfect,” he grinned, settling further into the couch and leaning back. “Do your worst.”

Rey smiled down at him. While she wanted to immediately straddle him- he was more than ready for it- he needed to suffer a little first. She sank to her knees between his thighs and saw his smirk drop. She pressed her lips to the inside of his thigh and his whole body jerked.

“Fuck, Rey,” he groaned, trying to regain control of his body.

“Not off to a great start, Alpha,” she muttered before laying another kiss on his thigh. He jerked again but she didn’t stop. Rey peppered kisses up his thigh ending with a light touch of her lips on his hip bone.

There was no smirk on his lips anymore. His eyes were firmly planted on the ceiling, his fingers curled into the upholstery of the couch. Rey giggled, setting her lips back to his hip bone. He moaned quietly as she moved across his pelvis. She trailed kisses across his abdomen below his belly button. She could feel the muscles tensing beneath her mouth and the small gasping noises as he tried to reign in control.

Rey stood up slowly, trailing her fingers along his thighs as she did. She leaned over him, pressing her hands against his chest. He sighed under the contact, his body as tense as cello strings under her fingers. She pressed closer, her lips on his throat. She felt his hips buck but she kept going pressing kisses until she reached the skin right beneath his ear. She nipped at him and sucked relentlessly with every intention of leaving a bruise. Her hand grazed his scent gland and he jerked again. His knuckles were ghost white where he gripped the couch.

She brushed her lips against the shell of his ear, and he moaned, almost a whimper. His eyes were shut and sweat dripped down his forehead.

“You win when I come,” she whispered. She saw his face change. Whereas he’d been adrift he was now grounded. His jaw flexed and he grit his teeth together.

“Then Alpha’s Choice?” he asked, opening one eye to look at her.

“Anything you want,” she said pressing a kiss to his collarbone and moving down his chest, her fingers grazing his abs. He swallowed hard, his hips lifting from the couch before settling back against the cushions.

“Pick a word,” he said, nearly breathless.

“A word?” Rey laughed, her torturing halting for a moment. He looked down at her, a challenge flashing in his eyes.

“A safe word.”

Rey cheeks flushed.

“What are you planning on doing to me, Solo?” she asked, before quite abruptly slipping a hand around his cock. His whole body jerked, and he slammed a fist against the couch beside him.

“Just pick a word,” he gritted out between his teeth.

“You sure are a cocky Alpha,” Rey said, running her hand up and down his length before releasing him. He let out a low groan, his head lolling to his shoulder. Rey stood up a smile plastered on her lips. “That’s a good word- I pick cocky.”

“Rey, this is unfair,” he groaned. Rey, as kindhearted as she is, took pity on her poor Alpha. She gripped his shoulders and stepped onto the couch, a foot on either side of his thighs.

“You’re right,” she said, balancing over him. She gripped his length and lowered herself on the very tip. She felt it press against her entrance and she lowered herself onto him just far enough to make him let out a low relieved moan. And then, she immediately lifted off. He gasped, obviously wanting to touch her but fighting the instinct. She shifted, sitting astride his thigh instead of his lap. “And life’s not fair.”

He sighed, his dark eyes closed, the muscles in his jaw tensing and relaxing.

“Rey,” he said slowly. “Please.”

“If you were not bound by the legality of Omega’s Choice,” she began, leaning against his chest. His skin was warm on hers, his whole body tense beneath her. She dragged her index finger over his chest feeling the goosebumps rise with the gentle touch. “What would you do to me right now?”

“Rey, you’re not going to get a very… elegant response from me right now,” he said, his voice strained. She shifted to look up at him, eyes still closed as if trying to stay focused.

“I don’t want elegant, I want Alpha,” she crooned. He opened an eye to peer down at her before shutting them again.

“I’d fuck you, Rey,” he grunted. “I’d throw you over my shoulder and carry you to the table. I’d fuck you till you couldn’t speak.”

Rey’s thighs grew slick as he spoke, his voice raw. She leaned up, grabbing his ear lobe between her teeth. He grunted, the veins in his arms poking up against the skin with the force he held onto the couch. She licked the shell of his ear sending a shiver through him she could feel shake his chest.

“Would you knot me?” she asked, pressing a kiss to his scent gland. Her own hand moving between her legs. She pressed against her fingers, pleasuring herself while sitting astride his leg.

“God, yes.” His voice trembled.

“Would you make me come all over your knot?” Rey asked, grinding against her hand.

“First, you’d come on my mouth,” he said, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down. “Then you’d come on my knot.”

She leaned back against his shoulder, her free hand reaching up to tweak her nipple as she climbed higher and higher on her fingers and Ben’s words.

“What about your fingers?” she asked. “Don’t you want me to come on those too?”

“Fuck,” he muttered under his breath.

“You’re so good with your fingers,” she muttered, more of a confession than dirty talk. She felt him tense under her, fighting the instinct to touch her. Her fingers moved quicker, heat building between her legs as she reached closer to her peak.

“Remember your word,” he whispered just as she began to touch her climax.

Rey gasped, her whole-body shuddering as she came onto her fingers and Ben’s thigh. Then just as he promised, his hands were on her, lifting her up and throwing her over his shoulder. She blinked, aftershocks still shuddering through her body, and hardly realized what was happening before she was laying down on his dining table looking up at him. A light hung above her, casting his body in a warm glow but shadowed his already dark eyes.

And then he was on her. His lips on her lips, his hands on her body. She gasped as if suddenly plunged into a cold river. He moved so quickly she could hardly figure out what sensation was running through her before it changed again. His lips were her scent gland, then on her own, then on her thighs. One moment her feet dangled off the edge of the table, the next they were braced on his shoulders.

She wasn’t prepared for the sheer speed that he moved from task to task. His lips were on her nipples, his hands under her arching her back and then suddenly they were in her hair and his mouth was against her throat. This was what being consumed must feel like.

Lord, he wasn’t even in rut.

Rey gasped for air as he blew over her like a storm. He pulled her hips closer to him lifting her ass off the table to press his lips between her thighs. She gasped, her skin still tender from the climax of her own making. However, her body was also ready. It took almost nothing before she was twitching and shuddering, her come coating his chin as a second orgasm tore through her.

Rey could hardly breathe. Her whole body was on fire, her skin sensitive and alert. Her hips settled back against the table only for him to snap them close against his.

His fingers dug into her hips and he pressed his cock into her. Her gasp of surprise soon melted into a moan as he filled her up inch by inch. He leaned over her, his forehead resting on her shoulder as he slid in slowly to the hilt. He filled her perfectly, rubbing every inch of her that needed his touch. He paused for a moment, letting her savor his length. He stood up, still pressed inside of her and winked.

“Hold on.” His voice was devilishly low.

“To fucking what?!” she asked but he was already in motion. He gripped her hips as he thrusted into her relentlessly. It was just like the videos of Alphas she had watched alone in her dorm room, her fingers plunged into her panties. The speed, the force, all of it beyond what she thought was real. In truth she always thought those videos were sped up just a little, just to show off. But Ben Solo proved himself a real Alpha. He pulled out only to snap back in so quickly she didn’t know to react. She moaned only for the sound to be lodged in her throat as all her senses fell away except for the sensation of him moving inside of her, rubbing a fire within her in the way only he could.

Her fingers curled around the edges of the table, holding on as he bucked his hips into her over and over again. She didn’t think she could come again, not after coming twice in a row. But the sensation of her Alpha’s cock inside of her was too much. She clutched the table as yet another wave knocked over her. She tensed, her body shaking as she came, his name on her tongue. Her walls clenched down on him and his hips stuttered. They locked into place, his knot swelling as he reached his peak. He leaned against the table, his shoulders shivering as the force of his orgasm passed through him. She watched his face- the flush of his cheeks and the way his mouth hung open slightly as instinct took control for one shattering moment. They stayed like that for a few moments, panting and sweaty as her walls forced every drop of come from his knot, his body shaking with each fresh pump. He filled her to the brim, her whole body warm and sated.

“God, Solo,” she panted. “You’re a fucking animal.”

His body shuddered again and more come poured into her. Rey shivered with the sensation of fresh heat.

“Thank you,” he grunted.

Carefully, as not to disturb their tender connection, Ben wrapped his arms around Rey’s waist and lifted her up. She held onto his shoulders as he carried her into the dark bedroom. He held her close to the wall and she reached over his shoulder lazily flicking the light on. As gently as possible, he laid them both onto the sheets. Rey settled against the pillows savoring the comfort of a cushiony nest and an Alpha’s knot firmly inside of her. She closed her eyes, letting the warmth sink into her skin as Ben pulled the comforter over them. He pressed a kiss to her forehead, his arms holding her close.

Sleep pulled heavily on her but just as she was drifting off, she could hear his voice low against her hair.

“I love you.”

Chapter Text

For the first time ever, Rey woke up before Ben. She slipped out of his embrace, leaving the bed to steal a t-shirt from his dresser. She tied her hair up and looked at him, sprawled out on the bed snoring quietly. Her body was sore from the gymnastics she had pushed it through last night, but she was contemplating waking him up just to dive into it again.

I love you.

The words made her feel lighter and heavier in a single moment. Ben Solo loved her. Ben Solo, the asshole, the great musician, the moody Alpha, all of them loved her.

She didn’t remember if anyone had ever told her they loved her before. Her parents abandoned her before she could even walk, but much less remember if they attempted to love her. Foster parents say they’ll care for you until you’re too much. Friends like you. Mentors are proud of you.

But love? Had Rey ever felt love? She’d been with a few men before but she’d never told a soul she loved them. That word was reserved for things that could not express it back. Pancakes and music. Gossip and coffee. If she ever said she loved something that had the ability to her love her back, there was the chance they wouldn’t.

She felt she shouldn’t have even heard the words. He obviously thought she had been asleep, and it felt as if she’d been listening into his thoughts. But still, it was real.

Ben shifted in his slip, his hair falling into his eyes.

Love. How odd.

Rey slipped out of the bedroom as quietly as she could and dared to enter Ben’s kitchen. It was full of cookware and devices that had never seen before much less knew how to use. She decided to keep it simple- put on some coffee and fry some eggs.

His coffee maker was sleek, expensive, and entirely too complicated. After a few minutes fiddling it and googling the model for instructions she had it brewing. She set a pan to the fire and started cracking eggs.

He always brought her coffee or made her breakfast when she slept in, so it only made sense to return the favor.

Rey wasn’t sure how he liked his eggs, but if it was like anything else it was probably the opposite of Rey. She liked hers cooked completely through- overdone some might say. So, she left the yolk of his runny and slid it onto a plate.

And yet a simple breakfast of eggs and coffee did not seem enough. Not after the active night they had. Not for an Alpha. Not for her Alpha. Rey looked into the fridge and pulled out a package of bacon to throw into the pan.

It still seemed small so she threw bread into his toaster (it could toast four pieces of bread at a time. Useful, she guessed, but who is that desperate for toast to need four at once?). Yet bacon, eggs, and buttered toast seemed too heavy. She found yogurt in the fridge and granola in the pantry and mixed them in a bowl beside the plate.

She now had a full plate, bowl, and mug for him and yet… it seemed not enough.

She was beginning to think that maybe what she wanted to give him wasn’t more food. Rey forced herself to shut off the burner and ignored the call to stumble with a waffle recipe. She set everything she made on a tray she had found in the cabinets and started for the bedroom.

Only to have the door open before she reached it.

“No!” she cried. “Go back to bed! This is breakfast in bed!”

Ben, who’d thrown on sweatpants, looked from her distressed face to her offering. He cracked a smile.

“Did you make that for me?”

“No, for me- of course I made it for you,” Rey said, jerking the tray to point towards the bedroom behind him and sloshing coffee out of the mug. “Now go back to bed.”

“Okay, okay,” he said, throwing his hands up and retreating to the bedroom and under the sheets. Rey set the tray down on the table beside him.

“Black coffee,” she said, tapping the mug’s handle. He laughed, bringing the mug to his lips and taking a sip.

“Perfect.” He had worn a smile since he’d woken up and she couldn’t help but mirror it. Happy Ben made her heart full and she’d make a million cups of coffee to see it more often. “Where’s yours?”

“Hm?”

“Where’s your breakfast?” he asked.

Shit.

“I ate earlier,” she said, clasping her hands behind her back as if that made her look more trustworthy. His eyes narrowed.

“You’re lying,” he said, setting his cup on the tray and swinging his legs around to get out of bed.

“No, no please. You do this for me all the time and I wanted to do something special for you,” she said, pressing against his shoulders to keep him in bed.

“Special? Why?” he asked.

“Because… You’re special to me.” It wasn’t quite the word she was planning to use but the L word didn’t come easily to her tongue, not in this circumstance anyway. She dove into words, covering up her hesitance. “And because you made me come like a hundred times yesterday.”

“That’s something special in and of itself,” he said, wrapping his arms around her to grab her butt and pulled her close between his legs where he sat on the bed. A thrill went through her, heat growing in her middle. “I need no reward for that.”

His hands slid beneath her borrowed t-shirt, exploring her very bare body beneath. He raised an eyebrow as his hands moved up her stomach to cup her breasts. Rey flushed, falling apart in his hands as she always did.

“Come here.” He pulled her forward, her legs straddling his lap. Rey gripped his shoulders for support, burning want already forming between her legs. His mouth found her neck and she moaned, leaning into his touch as he kissed his way up to her jaw and claimed her lips.

“Wait,” she said pulling away. “Your eggs will get cold.”

“Rey, what do want to do right now? Watch me eat eggs or come?”

She considered it- after all these were special eggs she’d made but on the other hand she did rather enjoy an orgasm.

She wrapped her arms around his neck, slamming her lips into his. He responded to her, his hands gripping her hips to hold her close to his. Rey grinded against him, feeling his erection come to life behind the thin fabric of his sweatpants.

“God, Rey,” he moaned against her mouth. His voice made her shiver.

“I want you,” she whispered, her hands falling to the waistband of his pants and pulling on it desperately.

“Wait, let me-,”

“No!” Rey said, shoving his shoulders back. Ben fell, his back against the bed and staring up at Rey with an expression that could only be described as hungry. She lifted herself off his lap only far enough to pull his pants down and expose his erect cock. She wrapped her hand around him and lowered herself onto him.

No teasing. No excessive dirty talk. No games. Just the need to have him inside of her, close to her.

He was sitting up, his arms holding her. His lips were everywhere, kissing her mouth her collarbone, her neck. He bucked up into her, a steady rhythm they discovered quickly. It wasn’t as wild as last night or hurried like in his car. His moans were soft, her gasps whispers. As if someone might overhear and make them stop. She wasn’t doing this for anyone but him. She didn’t moan for his neighbors to hear. She did it against his ear, just for him.

He picked her up, flipping them over to stand over her and drive her into the sheets. She felt her peak reaching and she couldn’t help but giggle. This was certainly better than watching him eat eggs, but she would have enjoyed both just as much.

She looked up at him, his dark hair curling around his face, his dark eyes focused on her face as he thrusted into her again and again.

And it was perfect. A kind of perfection she didn’t know she would ever have, ever could have.

Oh God. She loved Ben Solo.

Rey’s orgasm jerked through her body suddenly. She shook, clenching down on him and shuddering as it worked through her; curling her toes and pushing his name from her lips. His hips caught shortly after and he started to pull out as his knot began to inflate.

“No,” she whined, reaching for him. “Stay with me.”

He hesitated before pressing back into her. They both shook as his knot filled her up. They stayed like that for a moment before Ben, the ever-vigilant Alpha, shifted them over to lay on the bed with the comforter pulled up close around Rey’s shoulders.

“You know, I can’t spoil you like that every single time,” Ben said. Rey had her head pressed against his chest, listening to his heartbeat calm down.

“Oh, don’t act like you do this just for me,” she said wiggling her hips and earning a strangled moan from Ben. He clenched his arms around her, holding her tightly against his chest.

“Alright, it may also be a bit self-indulgent,” he admitted.

“And don’t worry I can make breakfast again,” Rey said.

“I think you put the whole pantry on the tray,” he chuckled, peering over at the plate.

“I got a little overwhelmed, but I wasn’t sure what you liked and you know Alphas need a lot of food,” she said, dragging a finger across his chest.

“I’m joking, it was perfect,” he said.

“You didn’t eat any of it!”

“It looks perfect!”

They laid together, talking and enjoying one another’s warmth until finally Ben was able to pull out of her. He slipped into the bathroom and she was left staring at the ceiling and wishing he was close again. Wishing he was inside of her, wishing to fill the hollowness inside of her heart she felt whenever he wasn’t near.

God, she had it bad.

After they both showered and put on clean clothes and went to the kitchen to save the bits of Rey’s breakfast and remake the parts that were bad. Truly only the eggs had lived past their shelf life. Rey manned the skillet as Ben reached around her tossing in seasoning. He heated up his black coffee in the microwave and poured Rey her own cup, dumping in the entire Wonka factory’s supply of sugar. They danced through the kitchen, scrambling Rey some eggs, throwing more bacon on the stove to fry and even pulling out a waffle recipe Ben swore by.

By the time they had sit down at the counter to eat they had enough food to feed five people and it was nearly noon.

Rey shoved a large piece of waffle in her mouth and looked up to see Ben watching her.

“Wa?” she asked around the mouthful of whipped cream and syrup.

“Nothing,” he said smiling and turning back to his plate. She felt a blush creep up her cheeks.

They finished up and Ben loaded the dishwasher while Rey laid across the couch listed the things they could do with the rest of their day.

“We both have to be up early in the morning- which is entirely your fault by the way- so we shouldn’t go out late or anything. My cello is at my apartment and I don’t want to have to wake up any earlier than necessary to go get it. Maybe we can hang out at my place? Is that okay?” she asked.

“I think that sounds fine. You don’t have any clothes over here to wear tomorrow either,” he said, from the kitchen.

Rey paused, considering that thought.

“Should I… bring some?” she asked. Then quickly sat up, looking up at him over the back of the couch.

“Yes. In fact, bring all of them so you can do laundry without breaking a roll of quarters,” he said rinsing out a mug.

“If I bring all my clothes then I’ll have nothing at my place,” she said.

“Then I guess you’ll have to leave your cello over here too,” he said, faux concern in his voice. “And your toothbrush.”

Rey watched him as he placed the mug in the dishwasher.

“What are you suggesting, Solo?” she asked.

“Nothing,” he said with a shrug, closing he dishwasher and walking around the counter. “Just offering a place to stay with walls in it.”

“Hey,” Rey threw a pillow from the couch at him. He chuckled as it pelted him in the shoulder. “I have walls! Just not… inside the apartment.”

“Your place sounds great this afternoon,” he said, walking over to the couch to lean over the back and press a kiss to her lips. “Let me grab a few things.”

Rey watched him walk into the bedroom and felt a flutter in her stomach.

On the way to her apartment Rey had Ben stop a corner store. He was entirely too wary of the neighborhood, but she ignored him gathering an armful of potato chips and sour candies and coconut flavored seltzer water. She placed it all on the counter and was looking for her card in her pockets when the register dinged, and the recipe was already printed out. He gave her a smile as he grabbed the bags and carried them back to the car.

At the apartment they kicked off their shoes and laid out their bounty. Rey cleared out a drawer for Ben to put the clothes he brought over and he laid his violin beside her cello. Rey slipped behind her bedroom curtain and changed into pajama pants and grabbed a seltzer water.

“Do you want to watch a movie?” she asked, crossing to her pile of DVDs.

“Sure,” he said, grabbing a candy out of the bag and sitting on the couch. “You know we could stream something.”

“I know, but I already spent money on these things and by God I am going to use them,” Rey said, waving a DVD case at him. She searched through the titles looking for something fun. She gasped, grabbing a case from near the bottom of the pile. “Ben! Ben have you seen The Alpha from the Black Lagoon?”

“Uh no?” he said, narrowing his eyes at the case Rey shoved in his face as she jumped on the couch.

“AHHH! It’s my favorite!” she said wiggling around and pulling the case back to look at it. She had bought this copy from a secondhand store when she was fifteen after flirting with the boy at the counter to keep him from carding her. She’d watched it a million times, had practically memorized it. “Will you please watch this with me?”

“Of course,” Ben said. “What’s it about?”

“Oh my God well it’s about an Alpha who is all deformed and he’s shut himself off but then this Omega- I’ll shut up you just need to watch it!” Rey jumped off the couch and sprung open the case. She pulled the disc that was already in the player out and shoved this one in. She grabbed the remote and a blanket and returned to the couch, snuggling close to Ben’s chest as the movie began to play.

He asked a few questions at the beginning, but as the action ramped up, they were both quiet. The beautiful Omega stood on the bow of a boat in a striking white swimsuit. She dove into the water and the monstrous Alpha peered out from behind a rock underwater all gills and scales. He followed her, swimming in tandem with the Omega. He reached out, his clawed fins brushing her ankle and frightening her away.

As the scene changed Rey let out the breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. Ben held her closer feeling the change. It was her favorite scene, just the two of them sliding through the water. The movie went on with the famous scene of the Alpha holding an unconscious Omega. The Omega’s boyfriend, handsome and tan with the typical Alpha build, saves her from his clutches and the deformed Alpha disappears into the water his fate unknown. The credits roll.

“I always wanted to end differently,” Rey said, resting her head on Ben’s chest.

“How did you want it to end?”

“It’s so obvious that he likes her, but he just doesn’t know how to express it. He’s lived in this separate world and showing affection is… ” she paused, a lump forming in her throat. “It’s hard for him.”

“The music was nice,” he said.

“I have the sheet music for it,” Rey said, rising from the couch to grab it and then realizing she wasn’t sure where it’d been placed last. “Somewhere…”

“Look for it later,” he said. He stood and picked her up, mimicking the carry from the movie. Rey shrieked which melted into laughter.

“Where are you taking me?” she said, trying to imitate the actress but failing miserably.

“To my lair of course.” He carried her to her curtained off bedroom, dropping her on the bed before climbing over her and pressing his lips to hers. Her bedroom was like a lair of sorts. A small section she had carved out for herself with purple curtains and fairy lights she had bought on sale. It was a mess of books and pillows but comfortable. And hers. She had nothing to call her own growing up besides a pair of worn out sneakers and having her lair was so important.

She never let anyone else into it. Friends would come over, but they stayed in the rest of her apartment. Her bedroom was her safe space and the only person allowed inside was Ben Solo.

“What are going to do to me?” she asked as his kisses trailed down her neck. She was expecting something spicy like ravage or the ever-popular Alpha phrase: have. Which when spoken in a movie always feels corny but when actually spoken from an Alpha’s lips makes her lightheaded.

“I’m going to take care of you,” he said, laying a kiss on her collarbone.

It wasn’t what she was expecting but God did she need to hear it.

Chapter Text

“Rey wake up, honey.”

Her eyes snapped open. It was still dark outside, but Ben was wide awake. He was already dressed in the clothes he’d packed: a light blue button up and black slacks. A very professional look that after lounging around in casual clothes all weekend gave her pause. He looked like Alpha violinist douchebag Ben Solo not her sweet caring Alpha. However, that thought was quickly banished as he handed her a mug. She could smell the cinnamon roll flavored coffee and quickly grabbed it to sip on it. Ben chuckled.

“You’re like a sugar gremlin, you know that?” he said.

“MmmMm,” Rey muttered, sipping her coffee. She had never been a morning person but they seemed a lot less stressful with Ben around. At least she could be caffeinated in bed and dress herself correctly. The amount of times she’d thrown shirts on inside out before making coffee was too numerous to count.

After nursing her coffee and a piece of toast Ben persuaded her to eat, Rey pulled on some roughly clean clothes for work. Jeans from the floor and a shirt she never wore from the back of her drawer. She stepped into the bathroom to brush her teeth and Ben joined her. He’d brought his own toothbrush but as she dipped toothpaste onto her own he held his out. She smiled, smearing the bright blue goo onto his brush.

Silently they brushed their teeth, exchanging glances through the mirror.

It was all very domestic and it made a warm feeling bloom in her chest.

They threw on jackets, grabbed their instruments and headed to the music hall. They took Ben’s car but halfway there Rey wished she had asked to drive. With nothing to do her mind was wandering. She watched the city wake up around them as the sun began to peek over the horizon. People would see them pull into the parking lot together. They’d see them walking in together. They’d smell him on her, and they’d smell her on him. It was no secret now. Well it wasn’t really a secret before either but now it was really not a secret. This was an announcement.

The car shut off pulling Rey from her thoughts. Ben slipped out to grab her cello from the backseat.

Rey took a breath. This was nothing. She’d told people she was dating someone before.

Had she?

She thought back on the people she’d seen. Beta flings mostly that never lasted long enough to put a name to it. She chewed on her bottom lip trying to think of what to say when she walked in and stunk of Ben Solo.

Ben opened her passenger side door, giving a little playful bow.

“Mi’lady,” he said with a smile.

“I told you not to say that,” Rey smiled back, stepping out and taking her cello from him.

“I think it’s funny.”

“Well just say it to me, no one else will think it’s funny.”

“Why would I say it to anyone else? You’re my lady.”

“Jesus Christ, Solo,” Rey snorted. She opened the door to the music hall just as a gust of wind blew in behind them. It rustled the sheet music people were holding, knocking coiffed bangs out of place. It also took their smell with it. In an instant every Alpha standing in the hall had jerked their head up to look at them.

The sudden influx of eyes on her made Rey want to hide until she caught Poe’s gaze. He was giving her two thumbs up and wink while Finn tugged at his arm with a confused look on his face. Rose sat on the floor beside her viola with a pair of sunglasses, hiding what could only be a rough night, and a cup of coffee. She peered over the glasses looking from Ben to Rey before giving them both a nod of approval.

But Rey wasn’t worried about Poe or Finn or Rose. She was worried about the rest of them.

“I need to grab my binder, be right back,” Ben said before stepping to down the hall to his office. Rey shifted her cello on her back looking at the now murmuring group of musicians. The woodwinds are going to have a fucking field day that’s for sure.

“You know you’re more talented than you give yourself credit for.”

Rey looked up and found Hux standing beside her. He had his own thermos of coffee with him, his red hair slicked back with far too much gel. He gave her a pitiful look.

“You could have made first chair without fucking Solo, but you’ll certainly get there faster now.”

“Excuse me?” Rey snapped, her cello already sliding off her back. That defensive anger prickled at the back of her head like it had when she was a child just before she was sent to detention. She was prepared to throw a punch if she needed to. She remembered that in the world of adults and especially in the musician world, people didn’t tend to punch their way through things. Rey bit back her anger, forcing herself to shove a readied fist into her pocket to keep it from connecting with Hux’s face.

“Enjoy it while it lasts,” Hux said, punctuating the sentence with a tight insincere smile before leaving towards the rehearsal room.

“Morning,” Rose said, her voice hoarse. She was still hiding behind her sunglasses but that wasn’t what struck Rey as odd. Rose absolutely reeked of Alpha. It wasn’t one who Rey was familiar with but whoever they were they took quite a liking to Rose. Rey couldn’t stop herself, she brought a hand to her nose, holding her sleeve over her nostrils. “I know I didn’t shower.”

“No Rose it’s not… ” Rey looked around, she didn’t want Rose to be harassed by Hux for sleeping with an Alpha too. She lowered her voice to a whisper. “Did you fuck an Alpha?”

“Damn pheromones,” Rose sighed. “I met someone at a bar. Didn’t think it’d be this strong.”

“Well it is. Say away from Hux,” Rey said as Ben rounded the corner with his music binder under his arm and chatting with Holdo.

“Why?” Rose asked.

“He’s being fucking weird,” Rey said.

“So Hux being Hux. Gotcha.”

Holdo wasn’t smiling as she turned the corner with Ben. It wasn’t upset but it wasn’t overjoyed either. Rey felt dread fill her stomach. Ben gave her a small wave as he went straight to the rehearsal room. Holdo gave her a polite nod as they passed. Except it wasn’t just a nod.

Her nose wrinkled. She smelled it. Everyone could. Rey’s face went red as she grabbed her cello and followed them into the rehearsal hall.

Ben had said it would be fine. She was stressing about nothing. But that didn’t stop her heart from falling into a frenzy every time someone looked at her.

She settled into her place in the cellos and pulled out her binder. Ben was at Holdo’s podium and they were speaking in hushed tones.

God, let it be about the price of replacement strings or how the French horns were always late or something- anything- that wasn’t her.

It’s fine.

“Alright everyone. We have a concert on Friday and I don’t want you embarrassing me so let’s start with Appalachian Spring,” Holdo announced. Her voice was steady and sounded like every other rehearsal. Rey was happy to hear the familiar voice and fall into music. She turned the page and readied her bow and looked up to find Holdo’s eyes on her.

It was just for a moment. The conductor turned away just as quickly as Rey had raised her head but it made her nerves explode in her gut like a grenade. She could barely feel her fingers when it was time to come in. She came in late and tried to play catch up for a dozen measures before she gave up and lifted her bow from the strings and faked it until they reached the end. Holdo, of course, sent them right back to the beginning.

Rey used to live breath and sleep music. She did nothing else but practice and now it seemed to be the one thing she couldn’t figure out. Ever since coming to the orchestra she felt out of her element. She looked up through the crowd hoping to snatch a look at Ben for some comfort but found Hux’s sneering at her from the second violin section.

Rey turned away, determined to prove him wrong. She could make first chair all by herself and make that weasel eat his words.

The day went better after that. Rey was immersed in the music, absolutely focused on spiting Hux. It was a powerful emotion because by the time lunch came around, she was feeling on top of the world. Every piece they played through she hit every note perfectly. It felt like magic until her fingers, even as the callouses on her hand healed it felt effortless.

The broke for an hour and Rey made a beeline for Ben. He looked up as she approached his chair and broke into the most magnificent smile.

“Hey,” he said, his whole face lighting up as his eyes met hers.

“Do you want to get some lunch?”

“I’d love to.”

They sat in Ben’s car in the parking lot of the music hall munching on sandwiches.

“I know I’m going to sound paranoid but did Holdo say anything to you this morning?” Rey asked through a mouthful of tomato. She had been sitting on the question the entire time they had ordered lunch and couldn’t hold onto it anymore.

“About what?” he asked.

“About… us?” Rey asked swallowing the bite of sandwich she had been working on. It went down like sand.

“A little, but she’s not worried about it,” he said, waving his hand. “We agreed that while it isn’t the best optics, it isn’t harming anyone. We’re one orchestra, you know? We’re not going to be in the paper for this.”

Rey let out a long breath and collapsed against the passenger’s seat.

“Thank God, I’ve been worrying over it all morning,” she admitted.

“Don’t worry, Rey,” he said, reaching over and taking her hand. “It’s all settled.”

Quartet rehearsal went the best it ever had. Rose had been properly caffeinated, Finn had color coded his entire binder, Rey wasn’t worried about an Alpha, and Ben didn’t have to worry about his Omega. They all worked in complete harmony and it was wonderful.

Some of the flute players even wandered over and applauded after every song. They but down their instruments for a break and Rey couldn’t wipe the smile off her face.

“Dick that bomb?” Rose asked, raising an eyebrow at her.

“Oh? No- I mean it’s great- I- that’s not why I’m-” Rey struggled, her cheeks growing hot.

“It was a joke, Niima,” Rose chuckled.

“I know,” Rey said, even thought she in fact did not know it had been a joke. “It’s just… It’s nice to play. It’s nice when all the moving parts work together.”

“It is nice,” Rose said with a small smile.

“Yeah, it’s nice not to suck,” Finn snorted.

“You’ve all made really great progress,” Ben said. They all turned to him, somewhat surprised that he acknowledged it at all. Then he gave a thumbs up. Rose snorted, Finn jumped out of his chair to announce to the room he got a compliment from Ben Solo, and Rey just smiled. He smiled back at her and a flurry of butterflies filled her stomach.

He was so beautiful. She wanted to stand up and close the distance between them. Rey wanted to pull him into a hug and never let go.

And she would. As soon as work ended, she’d take him back to her apartment and she’d get to hold him. She’d get to trace his smile with her fingertips and feel the rumble of his laugh in his chest. Maybe when they were tucked into bed with her violet sheets wrapped around their legs before she flicked off the string lights over her pillows, she’d lean and whisper it to him.

I love you.

It was so quick but sometimes that’s how Alphas and Omegas work. This wasn’t during her heat. This wasn’t a byproduct of a million hormones scrambling her brain. This was Rey Niima’s genuine reaction to Ben Solo.

She wanted to love him and be loved back.

They dove back into the music and the whole time she practiced it in her head. She mouthed the words to herself, trying to see how they’d feel against her tongue. She was so excited to get home that when it hit five o’clock her hands were shaking as she put her cello in her case. Right as she was about to pull it onto her back, Ben swept it out of her arms yanking it onto his own shoulder.

“Allow me-”

“Don’t say Milady!” Rey giggled. They walked with Rose to the door. Finn had left as soon as he could, following the brass section out into the parking lot to meet with Poe. They passed into the hallway and were almost to the back door when she heard Holdo’s voice.

“Niima and Solo, can I speak with you?”

They froze. All the panic Rey had managed to suppress came back full force. Ben’s hand wrapped around her own and kept her grounded.

It’ll be fine. It’s probably about something else.

“Uh, I’ll see you two tomorrow,” Rose said shoving her sunglasses on and awkwardly stepping into the parking lot. The door closed behind her and they were left under the cold fluorescents.

Rey swallowed back her worry and held onto Ben’s hand as they followed Holdo back to her office. The walk felt like it took a whole day. Just an expanse of green carpet and dull lighting until they stepped into her domain.

It smelled like cinnamon. She had a few candles burning on her desk and everything that wasn’t on fire was covered in papers. She sat on the other side of her desk; the window blinds flipped almost closed. Rey could still see people walking around the parking lot behind her.

Ben set their instruments down and they took their places in the two chairs positioned in front of Holdo’s desk. Once they were settled the conductor finally spoke.

“I don’t want to do this,” Holdo began. The familiar weight of dread dragged Rey down and she was glad she was sitting otherwise she may have collapsed. “I was fine looking the other way despite the implications of what your relationship might bring. But I received more than one compliant today concerning you two. It seems people think it is inappropriate and one… one person even threatened to go to a journalist.”

Ben’s hands curled into fists, but he kept them resting on his thighs even as his knuckles turned white.

“You understand I want you both to be happy, but I have to put the orchestra first,” Holdo said. She seemed genuinely pained, but it didn’t make her words feel any less sharp.

“What are you asking?” Rey asked, her voice softer than she wanted it to be. She wanted to stand up in defiance but instead she sounded sad and small.

“I’m asking that-”

“-You’re telling us to break up,” Ben interrupted. Rey could tell his molars were grinding together and his smell peaked. An Alpha felt threatened.

Holdo gave him a cold look. She was a fellow Alpha and older one who knew how to control herself in an emotional situation.

“Calm yourself, Solo. You always knew there was a chance this would happen, so don’t act so indignant. I’m sorry, but as long as the two of you work in this orchestra, I’m asking to please refrain from forming any relationships.”

“Then I submit my resignation,” Ben said.

“And I deny it.”

Rey let lightheaded, as if the room was moving around her and the entire thing would blow away in a puff of smoke like a dream.

“I’m not going to let either of you do something rash right now. Go home, think on it.”

Without another word, Ben stood up and grabbed her cello. He had his violin under his arm and was out the door before Holdo could say another word. Rey paused, looking from the empty doorway Ben had just vanished from to Holdo still sitting calmly behind her desk.

Their gazes snagged and Rey felt her anger rise in her throat but before she could unleash it Holdo spoke first.

“You know it’s better this way,” she said. Her voice held a sliver of bitterness. “This way all your accomplishments are yours.”

Rey felt her jaw start to tighten, but she choked back her rage.

“They would have always been mine,” she said sharply before rising and leaving.

Fury burned bright in her gut, her hands fists at her sides. If she saw Hux she’d punch him so hard his nose would be concave. It had to have been him. She couldn’t imagine anyone else being so cruel. In fact, Rey was prepared to walk out into the parking lot and scream his name. She’d fight him right then and there. She needed to punch something, to slap and scratch and try to fight for what she wanted. She’d once broken a girl’s nose over a denim jacket, she’d fucking kill Armitage Hux for this.

Rey marched down the hall to the backdoor when a hand caught her and pulled her into a dark room. The door slammed behind her and she realized she was in Ben’s office. She could smell him- the normal everyday Alpha scents that were warm and comfortable but also the raging peak that had been wafting off him in Holdo’s office. The lights were off, but she could make out his face in the dim evening sun coming in through the window. He pressed her against the door, her back flush against the wood. The weight of him against her was delicious. He was panting, his breath warm against her cheek. Her anger quickly fizzled out, but her heartbeat never slowed. Ben pressed his lips to her neck right beneath her jaw and she gasped. Despite every time he had touched her this one kiss felt electric.

“Take off your shirt,” he growled against her throat, yanking at the collar of her jacket trying to expose more skin. “I want to make you mine.”

Chapter Text

“Please,” she moaned, giving into his touch. She melted against the door unable to hold her own weight. Her fingers curled into shirt as the heat of his mouth against her neck overtook every other thought.

This is what she wanted more than anything else in the world- or was it? Her Omega mind certainly wanted it but did Rey?

Her fingers wrapped in Ben’s dress shirt loosened and she pushed against his shoulder. He immediately responded to the movement, pulling his lips away from her skin to look her in the eye. His pupils were wide with want, his cheeks flushed from frustration and desire. Still there was concern etched into his face. Rey felt a splinter poke against her heart threatening to rip it open and spill blood all over the office carpet.

“Not like this,” she whispered.

Just like that he stepped away, his eyes falling to his shoes.

“You’re right,” he said, his voice ragged.

They stood in silence for a long moment, too afraid to move or look at one another. Rey was terrified of the emotion brewing inside of her, of the want and desire but also the desperation.

“Music is all I have,” she said thinking of the long hours in college practice rooms, of the odd jobs she took to pay for new strings. The neverending struggle to finally get to where she was now and how she couldn’t let it slip from her fingers. She was caught between two worlds, the life of an Omega whose only desire was to be wanted and cared for and the very real life Rey Niima was living where she needed to pay rent. Where she needed more than just an Alpha to make her coffee. “I can’t lose this job, I’m sorry.”

She started for her cello case, grabbing its handle when Ben slipped his hand over hers. His touch was gentle, a plea for her to pause the movement. Her eyes went to his and she could see the hurt he was trying to hide.

“Please,” he said quietly, his voice trembling despite his best efforts. “We can’t leave without talking, I can’t do that again.”

Rey knew he was right. They both had a tendency to rush out without explanations and the week had been full of too many misunderstandings to add another one. They were not fighting with one another, they were fighting an unjust rule and they needed to work together.

“I don’t know what to do,” she admitted, blinking away tears that stung her eyes. She was not going to cry over this, not right now not when it wasn’t over yet.

“I know what this means to you,” he said, his hand leaving hers to touch her cello case. “I would never ask you to give it up. Never. But I also can’t live in a world where I see you everyday and have to pretend I don’t care about you.”

Rey nodded, emotion closing her throat. She had lived only a few days with Ben at an arm’s reach and it had wrecked her. She needed him like she needed music- like she needed air in her lungs.

“Ben, I love you.” The words were out of her mouth before she realized what she was saying, but she had no desire to take them back.

“I love you-” Ben began but his body got the better of him. His hands cradled her face and their lips were meeting. Not in the hurried heat kind of away but in the gentle desperate way the leads of romance movies come together at the end right before the credits. When rain is falling and every obstacle has been hurtled and they can finally cling to one another.

Only there was still mountains for them to overcome.

“Rey, I love you so much,” he said between kisses. His lips tasted of salt and she realized he was crying. A giggle suddenly grew in her stomach before leaving her throat and breaking their kiss.

“I’m not dying, Solo,” she chuckled. He smiled but didn’t see the humor as clearly as she did. She wiped a tear from his cheek with her thumb. “Now listen to me, you’re gonna drive me home. Grab whatever you have at my house-”

“Rey-”

“Shut up I’m not done,” she said pressing a finger against his lips. “And you’re going to go home. We can’t be together here or really anywhere. We can’t smell like each other. But we live in the age of technology. I’m going to call you constantly. You’re going to have so many pictures of my tits on your phone you’ll have to open a gallery.”

Finally he laughed, his smile breaking the somber cloud that had fallen over him.

“There’s always a loophole and it’s not always going to be like this. Everyone will forget and then we’ll make out in your office everyday,” Rey said, holding onto her smile. She knew what she was suggesting wasn’t what either of them wanted, but it was the best they had. “It’ll be our little secret.”

It felt like a victory. Even as they shuffled out of the building with red rimmed eyes and drove towards Rey’s apartment she felt like that had won. They stood outside of her door and Ben gave her one last kiss and it tasted like winning.
It wasn’t until Rey sat on her couch in her quiet apartment that smelled distinctly of Ben did the thought hit her that she didn’t know when she’d be able to touch him again.

She carried her bedding down to the laundromat and used her last quarters to run it through a cycle to make sure she smelled as “broken-up” as possible the next day. Watching the sheets swirl around through the clear washing machine door did she feel the immensity of what she had given up. Like a piece of her had been broken off and was missing.

Her phone buzzed.

I miss you already

Not missing. She knew exactly where that shard of herself was and it still belonged to her just from afar. For now.

Laying in her covers that smelled like cheap soap, Rey stared at her nightstand in the dim glow of the fairy lights hanging above her bed. Her phone buzzed filling her apartment with bright blue light. She grabbed the device swiping it open to read the message.

You should be asleep

She smiled while typing out her response.

So should you.

Rey laid the phone down on her bed beside her staring at the three dots until a new message popped up.

I can’t. Alpha brain won’t be quiet.

Rey considered the words for a long moment. While her Omega brain felt cold and lonely she could only theorize what Alpha hormones were raging through Ben. He’d been threatened today, and now was away from his Omega. The primitive part of him must be screaming she was in danger. Rey picked up her phone and took a quick snap of herself, a simple picture of her laying on her pillow and sent it to him the caption “I’m safe.” After a moment there was another buzz.

That actually does make me feel better.

She relaxed into her mattress. It almost felt normal. She typed out a response.

See you tomorrow

Rey reached over and plugged in her phone ready to ignore it and try to get to sleep when the response came quickly.

Goodnight, my love

She lingered on the message, her eyes devouring it again and again, before tossing her phone aside and sinking into her blankets with the words etched behind her eyelids.

My love. My love. My love.

A clarinet player must have heard the hot gossip because the next morning absolutely everyone seemed to know that the short lived romance between the newly hired Omega and the Alpha Concertmaster was dead on arrival. Finn, Rose, and Poe were all huddled by the front door when Rey walked up, apologetic expressions on their faces.

Rose shoved a chocolate donut into Rey’s hand.

“We heard,” she blurted out before grabbing her into a hug and crushing the donut between them. “I wish you had told us, Rey. We would have spoken to Holdo- we still can.”

“It’s alright,” Rey said, slipping out of the woman’s embrace and wiping glaze from her jacket. “I’m alright. Everything is… alright.”

“It still isn’t fair,” Finn said.

“No, but sometimes life isn’t,” Rey said. “If it’s okay with you guys I’d rather not focus on it today. Just get into the music and keep myself occupied.”

“Absolutely,” Finn said, holding out a coffee cup. “With all the drama around here I forget we’re in an orchestra.”

“Is there some gossip I haven’t heard?” Rey asked, taking the cup from Finn and raising it to her lips.

“Well no,” Finn said, his eyes falling to the pavement. “Everything seems to revolve around you.”

“Oh.” Rey stood still for a moment before she took a sip of coffee and immediately burned her tongue.
“Come on, we don’t want to be late,” Poe said tugging on Finn’s elbow. Finn gave Rey a kind smile before following Poe into the building.

“It’ll be alright, Rey,” Rose said. “Just focus on the music and if you ever feel yourself desiring just picture your grandma’s face.”

Rey didn’t have the heart to tell Rose that she had never known her parents, much less her grandparents, and had no face to imagine. Instead she took another sip of too hot coffee and filled into the rehearsal room with the rest of the musicians.

For a while it was fine. She finished her coffee and went to her chair, setting up her instrument and sheet music. She was tuned, and prepared for the day for what felt like the first time in awhile. Really attuned to the music and ready for a focused rehearsal.

And that’s when the door open and his scent hit her. It felt like his arms wrapping around her, like his lips pressed against the bend of her neck. Rey’s head jerked up from her music, sweat already forming on the back of her neck. Ben was on a mission to walk directly to his seat but that didn’t stop his eyes from lifting from the floor to meet hers.

It was only for a millisecond but it made her heart lurch up into her throat. And just like that the moment was gone and they were back to staring at music notes but now she wasn’t sure what they meant.

“Morning friends,” Holdo said- when had she walked in? “We have a lot of crunching to do and I’d like to run Friday’s entire performance tomorrow so let’s work quickly and efficiently. Alright let’s wake everyone up- Radetzky March!”

Rey was still flipping through her binder when the brass section roared to life with the song that was incredibly loud and far too celebratory for her mood. She barely dove in at the appropriate measure but was determined to keep up. It was a brass heavy piece and as long as she played along there was little she could screw up.

Not only that she was one of the best cello players in the city and she had to show that she could still do everything she had done in her audition even with an Alpha in the same room.

They moved through piece after piece and while Rey’s thoughts were always on the music, her body was elsewhere. Her fingers moved across the strings, but she was sweating despite the autumn weather and drafty hall. Between songs she slipped out of her jacket and tied her hair up, determined to keep up.

It wasn’t until lunch break did she realize her body was never going to grow accustom to the temperature. The sensible 74 degrees the thermostat in the hallway displayed was not the cause of Rey’s discomfort. It was the Alpha trying desperately to suppress his smell that had run down the hallway to hide away in his office.

Panic rose in her throat. She slid through the other members milling around munching on sandwiches until she reached Poe Dameron where he was talking to Finn.

“Rey, you look,” his face changed from a friendly smile to a concerned grimace. “Wet?”

“What do you smell?” she asked, cutting straight to the chase.

“I smell love lorn Omega and frustrated Alpha,” Poe said bluntly.

“Is it strong?”

“Not really,” he said with a shrug. “But up close, I’ll admit it’s more than I’d like around my lunch.”

“Is that it?” she asked, desperately. Her phone vibrated in her pocket.

“What?”

“The smell!” she said, her voice louder than she had intended.

“Jesus Rey, yes. You smell like you got dumped, is that what you want me to say?” Poe snapped.

“Poe, be nice!” Finn said, grabbing Poe’s arm.

“No, thank you Poe that’s exactly what I wanted to hear!” Rey said, fishing her phone out of her pocket as it buzzed again.

“What?” Poe and Finn asked in unison.

“It’s just-” Rey’s words caught in her throat as she stared down at her phone. She was expecting a text message but what was waiting for her was far more than conversation starter from Ben. It was a picture. A picture of a fully erect penis she had come to know and admire quite a bit. “Uh, I’ll be right back.”

She turned and headed towards the bathroom without bothering to look up at her friends. She was going to need some time to herself if she was going to get through the afternoon.

Chapter Text

Rey doublechecked the lock on the bathroom door. It was a small room made for a single person at a time. Lots of room to move, but also prone to being disturbed with impatient knocking. She pulled out her phone taking a better look at the photo.

It was Ben alright… at full attention. A message was below it.

I can’t stop thinking about you.

Somehow he was both horribly crude and also kind of romantic. Rey chewed on her bottom lip trying to figure out what to reply. She had enough time to snap a few pictures. She didn’t exactly want to wiggle out of her jeans but was it fair to return a dick pic with boobs? They didn’t feel like the same level but she had plenty of time to take better pictures later at her apartment. If she was going to send a picture of her pussy it was going to be with good lighting and at least some level of production.

She yanked her shirt off. She had put on a sports bra that morning and that wasn’t exactly how she wanted to present herself over sext. Taking off the bra, she examined herself in the mirror. Her hair was tied up in a messy bun, her skin shiny with sweat. The boobs themselves were fine, she guessed? On the small side but Ben seemed to like them. She turned to the side, trying to figure out what angle would be best.

A knock at the door shook her thoughts.

“Occupied!” she yelled. There was a frustrated groan on the other side of the wood.

Rey pulled out her phone and lined up her chest with the camera. She took a few quick snaps but it didn’t seem like enough. Maybe tits just weren’t impressive to her at this point, but they could still be a novelty to someone without them?

Rey shoved one hand down the front of her jeans, snapping a picture so everything was in frame. Was she thrilled with the bathroom tile background? No, but sometimes you make sacrifices for the ones you love.

She pulled her hand out of her pants, holding it awkwardly before quickly washing her hands. The knock on the door came again. Rey grit her teeth, yanking her clothes back on and stepping out where a woman stood waiting for her with a bitter expression on her face. Rey gave her a fake smile before heading back towards the rehearsal room.

She moved close to a wall, shrouding her phone with one hand as she selected a picture and typed out a brief message.

Thinking of you 💖

Rey quickly slipped her phone into her back pocket and walked over to Rose, plopping down beside her. She could feel the tension in her shoulders creeping up her neck. She’d expected at least some amount of time in the bathroom alone without interruptions and being rushed was less than ideal.

“You looked tired,” Rose said, slurping a noddle from her tupperware container. “That or you’re used to getting your back broken by an Alpha and now have to live a boring single life like the rest of us.”

Rey nearly choked on her own spit.

“See I’m right,” Rose said and shoved a fork wrapped in fettuccine towards her. “Noodle?”

Rey almost declined but the rumble in her stomach made her reconsider. She leaned over, and slipped the fork in her mouth.

“Going after betas now are we?” a voice sneered. Rey felt like she might shatter from stress. She pulled the noodles from the fork with her teeth and whirled around to spot who had spoken, her mouth full of pasta.

Hux looked down at the both of them, a self satisfied smirk settled across his lips. Rey narrowed her eyes at him.

“Can I help you?” Rose asked, raising an eyebrow.

“New small group. Holdo wants to make sure everyone is highlighted Friday,” Hux said, handing a binder over to Rey. She took it, glancing at the music inside as she chewed through her mouthful of noodles. It was a violin and cello duet with Hux on violin.

“Wha ith thith?” she asked, her voice muddled by cream sauce and starch.

“And a solo for Miss Tico,” he said ignoring Rey and handing Rose a different binder. Rose dropped her food and snatched it.

“Oh shit,” she said, flipping through it. “I wish I had more time to rehearse.”

“Yeah this seems a bit last minute,” Rey said after finally swallowing the wad of fettuccine. She met Hux’s gaze and didn’t attempt to hide her suspicion.

“Consider it a challenge then,” he said with a thin smile. “If you can’t learn a simple piece in a week then maybe you should consider music as more of a hobby than a career.”

Rey blinked. A younger version of herself would have punched him right across the jaw. That’s what he wanted her to do- she could see it gleaming in his eye. Instead she forced her fingers to unfurl from a fist and tried to wear her most earnest smile.

“I’m so grateful for the opportunity,” she said, wrinkling her nose. Hux returned the same fake smile and handed her his phone.

“Put your number in, we’ll need to schedule a few extra rehearsals considering your experience level,” he said.

“Such a charmer, Hux,” Rey said, stabbing her finger against the screen as she formed an entry in his contact list. She handed it back out for him to take. “I wonder how anyone resist your natural charisma.”

His smile wavered. She had clearly struck a nerve and he snatched his phone back without a word.

“What a fucking asshole,” Rey said, turning back to Rose. However, her friend was engrossed in her solo music. Rey quickly grabbed the abandoned tupperware, swirling a few more fork loads of pasta into her mouth before scuttling back to rehearsal.

The cool kid quartet was broken up for the day and Rey was unable to hide her disappointment. Ben was across the room, helping other small groups of strings and practicing his own pieces. She wished she at least had Rose or Finn to speak to but they were all scattered to the wind and she was stuck with Hux.

Wonderful.

Hux was clearly looking for her to make mistakes. Desperate to point out something wrong without really caring if it mattered or not. Truthfully he was more of a nuisance than a strict teacher. Ben had been hard on her- too hard at times- but she had felt better under his tutelage. Working with Hux made her feel exhausted.

“Can we just play through once?” Rey said, leaning against the neck of her cello as Hux once again stopped them mid measure to let her know she wasn’t sitting up straight enough.

“Fine, but you’ll learn it wrong,” he said.

Rey flexed her jaw but kept quiet. Hux had already made her life harder, she didn’t need him crying to Holdo because she slapped him during rehearsal.

Fists were the way of a younger Rey Niima, a mature woman used her words.

“Whatever,” she said, drawing her bow. Sometimes a mature woman’s words weren’t always eloquent.

Hux was insufferable the rest of the day but that wasn’t much of a surprise. Rey quickly packed her stuff as soon as it was time to leave. Rose was still entranced in her working on her solo so Rey gave Finn and Poe a quick wave and headed out. She went to open the door to the parking lot when it swung open. The scent of an Alpha slapped her right in the face. And not just any Alpha, her Alpha.

She blinked through the haze up at Ben. His eyes were wide and he quickly jumped back, clasping his hands behind his back as if afraid they’d move on their own.

“Sorry I-” he began. She could understand his nerves but awash in his scent everything felt wonderful. In a cloud of Alpha scent Rey felt the tension in her back release.

“See you tomorrow, Solo,” she said, giving him a wink before walking to her car. Once behind the wheel and out of range of his delicious smell, however, she drove like a madwoman eager to get into the solace of her apartment. There she could take some truly interesting images for him. Maybe they could do a video chat then she could get a live reaction to her boobs instead of waiting all day for a reply.

Rey took the steps two at a time once she reached home. Immediately she started riffling through her clothes looking for something that screamed sexy. The hard part of that was lingerie tended to be expensive so it wasn’t like she had a bunch of it hanging around. Maybe if she asked for it Ben would buy her some. The thought sent a thrill down her spine.

She dropped the clothes in her hands- it would be better to wear nothing at all and let him decide what to put on her. Rey quickly started arranging the curtained off area of her bedroom for maximum appeal. She turned her fairy lights on and pulled the curtains closed. She threw a purple scarf over a lamp, bathing the entire room in a violet hue.

Rey kissed her fingers like an italian chef for it was perfection. She’d have to start an OnlyFans if she got any better at it.

She stripped off her clothes and ran a brush through her hair arranging it around her shoulders so it didn’t hide any of the goods but framed them. The Mona Lisa could not be in a simple frame from a big box store and her breasts deserved the same attention. Rey grabbed a deep red lipstick and spread it over her lips. She didn’t bother with her eyes as they wouldn’t be in the picture.

Rey stopped and looked at herself in the tall mirror leaned up against the wall that she kept telling herself she’d hang but never did. She looked fucking hot and she was going to ruin Ben’s fucking night with how scrumptious she looked.

Rey jumped in her bed, grinning like a maniac as she propped her phone up to get the perfect shot.

After an hour of bending and leaning and presenting in any way she could think of she was satisfied. She threw an oversized t-shirt on and grabbed a soda from the fridge as she swiped through the choices.

She made sure to have a variety and now she had to figure out one to send. Rey settled for a rather demure one she took laying on her back with her boobs as the centerpiece, her whole body bathed in purple light.

Eat your heart out Solo

She clicked send and tossed her phone on the counter. She started assembling a sandwich for dinner when her phone buzzed hardly 30 seconds after her message was sent.

Rey couldn’t contain her smile and she dropped the loaf of bread in her hands and snatched up her phone.

You’re so beautiful

Rey smiled, setting the phone up so she could see each message as it came up while she slapped peanut butter on bread. Her phone buzzed.

I miss you so much

She sighed. There was fun in this, absolutely, but what she really wanted was him close. To snuggle into his arms and be wrapped in his scent. To feel his lips on hers and just exist near each other.

The three little dots danced as Ben typed out a message but was interrupted by a chime from another message coming in. It had no name attached as it slid across her screen.

Are you available in the morning tomorrow? You rudely left before we could schedule a time.

Rey groaned, taking the phone to type up a message.

The morning is fine.

She saved Hux’s number as “Buttface” purely out of childish spite. Another chime, this time from Ben.

Tell me how much you need me

Rey felt her cheeks redden. He was making her blush from across the city and she wished he could see it just so he could tease her for it. This warranted another picture. She turned around, throwing her phone past the purple curtains onto her bed before grabbing her soda and sandwich. Her phone buzzed again and she hurried over, jumping into her blankets and sliding the notification open. She tapped the message field.

I need your Alpha cock so bad

Rey wasn’t in love with the message but the picture to go with it? Put Venus to shame. She picked one where she was sitting on her feet, her knees spread and her back arched. It had tits, it had vulva, and most of all it had pizzaz. With the warm glow of fairy lights in the background and cooler tones from her lamp it looked like art.

God, why did she ever fuck with a cello?

Rey tapped send satisfied with her photo session. She took a large bite of her sandwich and swig of cola before checking back for a reply. She tapped on Ben’s name only his last message sat lonely at the bottom of their chat, her lewd photo nowhere to be seen.

Panic gripped her stomach; cold and creeping through every inch of her body until her fingers were trembling against the screen as she switched over to the brief text exchange she’d had with Hux, her last message sitting at the top of the screen.

The morning is fine.

Only there were two more messages below it.

How does 5 work?

And then the meticulously picked nude photo of herself begging for Alpha cock.

Rey let out a horrified scream but it was too late. As she stared at her phone a small note appeared below her very NSFW photo.

Seen at 7:15pm.

Chapter Text

No words could describe the cocktail of embarrassment and fear. Rey jumped off her bed, pacing around her tiny apartment as if walking would somehow give her an idea of how to fix all of this. She started to text Ben but thought better of it. With all the stress of their pretend break up it was likely to kick him into super mega Alpha mode and she didn’t want to have to clean up that mess. Instead she dialed Rose.

“What’s up?” Rose said as soon as she picked up.

“I ACCIDENTLY SENT HUX A NUDE,” Rey blurted out. She could feel frustrated tears forming in the back of her throat. God, she wished she could die and not think about the aftermath of any of this.

“WHAT?”

“I KNOW.”

“How did that happen?!” Rose asked.

“I was…” Rey paused. She was supposed to be broken up with Ben. Despite being close to Rose it would be better if the only people who knew that Rey and Ben were still together were Rey and Ben. She loved Rose but she wasn’t always the best secret keeper. “Making a profile for that Omega app and wires crossed and things got fucked up.”

“Okay, no big deal. We all understand you’re super sad and horny right now,” Rose said. Rey frowned. Her happiness didn’t revolve around Alpha cock, it was just tied to a person who happened to have one. “Just tell him the truth that it was an accident. It’s not like he’d think you’re serious. You fucking hate him.”

“You’re right, you’re right,” Rey muttered. She knew that was the answer but she wished there was something less humiliating. Like a spell to make him lose his memory or hackers to fuck with his phone or something that erased this entire mistake from existence.

Rey pulled open her phone to see Hux’s typing. Panic flooded her again. God, what was he going to say to that? She quickly typed out a hurried reply and hit send.

Hey I didn’t mean to send that to you. Can you delete it? I’ll see you at 5 tomorrow.

She tossed her phone aside and fell into the sheets face first. All sizzle for the night had been snuffed out and now she got to panic all night about how awkward it would be when she dragged herself to rehearsal before dawn.

Wonderful.

Rey’s alarm blared before any rooster in the world could consider crowing. She’d barely gotten more than a couple hours of sleep and her entire morning routine slogged by in a fog. It was the drive to work that was the worst. Her stomach twisted into knots as she pulled into the parking lot and saw Hux’s car already there.

She couldn’t wait it out forever. She went inside and turned down the hall to the small practice rooms. Hux was already there, tuned, and practicing because of course he was. He looked up when she entered and Rey could feel her face get hot.

“Morning,” he said, looking back to his music.

“Good morning,” Rey said, moving to the other chair to pull out her cello. He didn’t say anything and at first it felt like he was torturing her but as she got her music laid out and they started to play it was a small comfort. Mentioning it would only make it worse and it soon slipped her mind as she focused on playing. After a full hour of rehearsal—where surprisingly enough Hux didn’t correct her every minute and a half—it sounded pretty good. A few more sessions and it would be concert ready for sure.

“I think it’s coming along!” Rey said as they packed up their instruments to move to the main rehearsal space.

“You’ve surprised me, Niima,” Hux said and she was surprised at the kindness in his voice. “You’re worthy of your spot.”

He grabbed his case and left, leaving her alone with her surprise.

That was not how she planned this morning to go but it was better than she could have imagined. The tension in her shoulders released and she let herself relax. Maybe she misread Hux, maybe he wasn’t entirely disagreeable after all.

Rey took her time fixing her music book and gently laying her cello in its case. She had always been worthy of her spot in the orchestra, but it did feel good not to constantly second guess herself. If the worst Alpha in the pack could accept her, then maybe there was a future beyond the last chair in the cello section. Everything she had worked for wasn’t all for naught.

When she stepped into the hall the chatter of morning arrivals was extra loud and she could feel a reprimand about professionalism from Holdo coming soon.

“Niima,” Holdo called from her office door. The Alpha’s face was straining to be neutral but there was a tug at the corner of her lip that told Rey this was not good news. Rey resisted the urge to look at Ben’s door to see if he was in already and instead followed Holdo into her office.

The room had not been welcoming any time she had stepped inside and this time was no different. A degree from a prestigious school hung on the wall, awards decorated her desk. Pictures of Holdo with other famous Alpha musicians stared down at her.

“You have a lot of potential, Niima,” Holdo said, sitting on the edge of her desk. Rey stood awkwardly beside the guest chair, white knuckling the handle of her cello case. “You are a promising musician, and I was grateful for the opportunity to introduce an Omega into the orchestra.”

There was a “but” in her tone that made Rey’s heart drop into her stomach.

“However,” Holdo said, shifting her weight as if uncomfortable with her own thoughts. “In our short time together there have been many disruptions.”

“From me?”

“I appreciate you and Solo’s willingness to discontinue any relationships while hired, but that doesn’t mean you can hop to another Alpha,” Holdo said.

Rey’s blood ran cold.

“What do you mean?”

“Hux told me what you sent him last night. You must know how unprofessional that is.”

“That was an accident, I told him that. I—” Rey bit off her words as Holdo raised a hand to silence her.

“I don’t want to lose you but you’re making it hard to keep you here,” Holdo said, giving her the same look all the social workers wore: the “why can’t you just behave?” face.

Rey looked around at the office, her eyes stinging. She had worked everyday for this and now that she had it… it wasn’t anything like she thought it would be. She’d worked herself to the bone everyday in Jakku just for the opportunity to audition. Every step she’d taken had led her here and now, after only a few months, it was becoming clear that no matter what she wanted this orchestra didn’t want her. She was sure they enjoyed the media attention for having an Omega in their ensemble, and that they thought she was a fine musician, but this constant hovering was too much. Poe and Finn were able to date just fine, but Ben and her couldn’t? Holdo would listen to an Alpha’s side of a story and take it as law without bothing to listen to an Omega’s side.

Rey grit her teeth. She wanted to make music, to join a song and add a piece of her soul to the sound. Not hack off part of herself to fall into line.

“I wouldn’t want to be an inconvenience for you,” Rey said, meeting the woman’s eyes with a forced smile. It was not quite a fist to the nose like she relied on as a child, but it was just as destructive. Either by hands or words, Rey had always found a way to protect herself but these words burned as they left her throat.

“Consider this my resignation.”

Rey sat in her car, keys in the ignition but not turned enough to turn it on. Her music binder was on Holdo’s desk, along with the paper she had signed with shaking hands. She had worked everyday for the perfect job and had let it go.

The tears had started falling the second she hit the parking lot. She looked up to her rearview mirror at the puffy red eyes looking back at her.

God, what had she done?

A car pulled into the lot quickly, slipping into a spot. Ben’s car. He popped out, a coffee cup in one hand and a folder under his arm. His hair was messed up and he jogged up to the door, clearly late.

“Ben,” she said, her voice hoarse from crying. It wasn’t loud enough to be heard outside of the window. She shoved open the door and started after him only for the heavy metal door to slam behind him. She paused. Would it cause a scene to tell him? Holdo wouldn’t like it, that was for sure, but she didn’t have to care about what Holdo liked anymore. She wasn’t her boss as of two minutes ago.

She pushed herself forward, her hand grabbing the handle only for the door to fly open on it’s own. It was not the comforting face she was expecting but the freckled face of Hux staring down at her.

She felt vulnerable with her tear stained cheeks, but refused to shrivel in his presence.

“I thought you’d be gone by now,” he said with a smirk.

She balled her fist.

“What’s wrong with you?” she hissed.

“I’m just following the rules,” he said, using the same soft tone he had used to compliment her earlier.

She wanted to hit him more than anything in that moment, but her vision blurred with fresh tears.

He deserved to be punched. He deserved to be knocked to the ground and to have each pearly white tooth smacked clean out of his skull. He deserved every nasty thought that popped up in her head, but her body was too worn out to act. She’d been fighting for years and now all she could do was glare at him, exhausted and spent.

“Best of luck, Niima,” Hux said before shutting the door in her face.

Her apartment had never felt so small. She fell into bed and stared at a bulb in her twinkle lights that was flickering. After an hour it died and so did half of the strand.

She had less than a thousand dollars in her checking account. The only thing worth anything in the entire square footage she rented was her cello, but it was also the only thing she could use to make money.

Her phone rang. It was the Orchestra offices. She ignored it. A text from Rose. Missed call from Finn. It rang three more times before she shut it off completely.

Her head ached from all the tears but she didn’t move. She’d been waking up at dawn for months, had been working herself to the bone and in the end it didn’t matter. Her work didn’t matter. Her music didn’t matter.

She fell asleep around noon, her body finally shutting down after the events of the morning. She woke to heavy knocking at her door.

Dazed, she sat up wondering if she had dreamed it. The knocks came again and she hopped over the clothes scattered across the floor and opened it.

Ben stood in the doorframe, his hair windswept, his face tinged pink and his chest rising and falling as if he’d run all the way here. His hand hovered between them, clearly wanting to touch her but resisting it.

“Let me help,” he said, breathlessly. Rey looked to his hand and then his eyes. He was hurting, like she was, but was fighting that Alpha instinct to take over. To sweep in and try to fix every problem.

Rey had always been independent, most of the time not by choice. She prided herself in her own apartment, in her own career. But now, she needed someone to shoulder her burden. She needed Ben. Her Alpha.

She nodded, fresh tears welling up. Ben crossed the threshold, pulling her into his arms. The smell of him was all around her and she didn’t realize how much she had missed it in the short time she had been separated from it. He was pressing kisses to the top of her head, his arms locked around her as if someone might try to steal her from him.

The tears came full force. A sob sent a shudder through her shoulders and suddenly she was off her feet and in his arms, bridal style.

“It’s okay,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to her cheek. “I’ve got you.”

Rey clung to his chest, her fingers twisting into his shirt. She had no words, only disappointment and sorrow in the form of sobs. Ben held her tighter, nuzzling his face against her neck.

He sat down on the couch and she curled into his lap, still crying into his shirt. His hand slid through her hair, his nails a calming pressure against her scalp. He held her until every last tear had spilled, until her body no longer shook with emotion. He held her until the sun set and the streetlamps turned on outside her window. He ordered dinner and put on a movie. He wrapped a blanket around her shoulders as she half-heartedly picked at her plate of food. He lit a vanilla candle on the coffee table she had forgotten she owned and the smell reminded her of when she first moved into the apartment: broke, hopeful and ready for anything that came her way.

“Thank you,” she said. Her voice was nasally from crying and her throat felt like it was full of sand. She swallowed a mouthful of rice but it did little to help the ache that had settled into her heart.

Rey looked up and realized Ben had put in her copy of The 200ft Alpha. They had attempted to see it at the cinema but that had been distracted. It was about mid-way through the movie and the alien Omegas had the Alpha tied to a slab, her hands bound with their giant ray pointed at the woman’s forehead. It was cheesy, the lighting dramatic and the set and props clearly made of foam and cardboard. Rey had watched the movie at far too young of an age, but it wasn’t like anyone was keeping an eye on her. She had liked it because it was one of the few movies that had the Omegas in control. They were aliens and more powerful than regular humans, even a human Alpha. They were beautiful and dangerous and smart, even if they wore tinfoil clothes.

“For a movie titled two hundred foot Alpha, this happens very late in the story,” Ben said lightly, clearly interested in the movie.

“Well you know old movies, they have to run around and eat up time before they get to the good stuff,” Rey said. “People used to have longer attention spans.”

“I almost regret not watching it the first time,” he said, giving her a smile. Usually his presence was enough to pull her out of a funk, but this went deeper than an Alpha’s pheromones could go.

“I don’t know what to do,” she said and immediately regretted saying it. She pressed her palms against her eyes as if that might stop tears from falling.

“You can do whatever you want,” Ben said, sliding an arm around her and pulling her close to his chest. “I’ll be with you all the way.”

“No, I mean how do I pay rent? How do I get gas? I don’t want to go back to Jakku,” she said, struggling to get the words out.

“You’re not going back to Jakku,” he said.

“How do I stay?”

“Stay with me.”

It was the obvious answer but she felt herself fighting against it. They’d been seeing each other only since her heat, and even then half of that time was spent in a mess of miscommunication and half-baked plots to fool their boss. It wasn’t exactly the foundation for a strong relationship, but Alphas and Omegas had worked with less. It felt like every other novel and movie was about some Omega who went into heat at the wrong place and just happened to be with their soul mate who would always be good to them. That wasn’t exactly how real life worked, but so far it had felt that way for Rey. Ben seemed perfect, but thinking of him as infallible would only set him up for failure.

Deep down she wanted it, but she also didn’t have any other choice.

Chapter Text

Rey stood outside the performance hall in the dress she had purchased to perform in. She wasn’t performing tonight, despite what the programs said. They had been printed before she had quit and her name was still listed among the other string musicians. She fiddled with her keys, her fingers lingered on the new one that graced the ring. She had spent the week moving her things to Ben’s apartment and trying not to feel guilty about it. She had never wanted to be the kind of Omega that moved in immediately, ready to be coddled and cared for but with rent due soon and she simply couldn’t pay it. Not that she didn’t want to be with Ben, but she didn’t want to be his burden.

She’d managed to get out of her lease, but only through Omega laws that made it easier for bonded couples to be together. The landlord had charged her a hefty fee that had nearly wiped her clean. Between that and the little moving expenses and gas that she didn’t tell Ben about she had fourteen dollars left to her name.

He had repeatedly told her that she did not have to come tonight but she insisted. She wanted to see him perform, maybe say goodbye to Finn and Rose in person. They’d been calling her all week but she couldn’t bring herself to answer. What would she say anyway?

Another live-in, barefoot Omega. She might as well get pregnant this week just to complete the stereotype.

Rey found a seat near the back of the hall as the show began. The curtain rose, Holdo had a little speech, and then it began. She hated that they sounded good. That she hadn’t left a huge hole in the sound, that she would be easily replaced.

She closed her eyes, listening to the music. Her fingers moved along the armrest, playing a phantom fingerboard.

“Mom, where’s the Omega?” a voice whispered in the row in front of her. Her eyes snapped open. A teenage boy leaned in to talk to his mother, a necklace hanging from his neck. It was clearly a scent suppressor popular among young Omegas to make life a little easier for them without wearing an obvious piece of medical equipment. Rey herself had one as a kid. It had been shaped like a heart and had a hinge like a locket to refill it. “I don’t see her.”

“She’s in the cellos, dear,” his mother said, patting him on the hand.

“But I don’t see her,” he said, disappointed, before slumping back into his chair.

A tear slid down her cheek that she quickly wiped away.

After the show Rey lingered awkwardly in the lobby. Rose was the first out and made a beeline for her. She wore her pretty black performance dress, and had applied eyeliner with a careful hand. Her dark hair was pulled back from face and fell across her shoulders in curls. She looked amazing and Rey wished she could have been more excited for her.

“Rey,” Rose said softly, as if speaking any louder would harm her. She pulled her into a hug which Rey reciprocated. “Are you okay?”

Word must travel because despite not speaking to her she seemed to know what had happened.

“I’m fine,” she lied. “You did amazing, your solo was so good.”

“Thank you,” Rose said with a smile. “I have to say hi to a couple people but do you want to get a drink?”

Rey’s smile fell. She had spent the last few days either moving boxes or nursing a bottle of wine. As much as she wanted to numb the pain she didn’t want to do it in a noisy club. Not to mention she had no money left to buy anything or tip.

“My stomach’s upset, but I’ll take a raincheck on that,” she said, forcing a smile. Rose paused, as if about to call out her facade, but thought better of it and disappeared into the crowd.

Rey managed more painful conversations with Poe and Finn, and a few other cello players that stopped by. They all went the same way and only made her feel worse. She didn’t know what to tell them, nor did they know how to handle her.

Ben stepped into the lobby and the crowd pressed towards him. As concertmaster there were plenty of amatuer and established musicians that wished to talk to him and she had no desire to prevent it. Rey stood near the door, watching him shake hands. He seemed made for this.

“Miss Niima?” a voice asked. Rey turned and saw the teen that had sat in front of her. He was short, his nice clothes too large in the shoulders and long in the sleeves. “Can I get your autograph?”

Rey looked to the boy’s hand where he held a program and a pen and then to his hopeful gaze.

“I’m sorry,” she said, “but I didn’t play tonight.”

“I know,” he said, holding out the pen. Rey looked to the mother but she wore the same hopeful expression as her son. Rey took a breath and then the pen, signing her name beside where it was printed in the program. The boy examined her handiwork up close before looking up with a full smile. “Thank you!”

The mother said a quick thanks as well and the pair were off. Rey watched as they stepped outside and faded into the night outside.

They arrived back at Ben’s apartment late but neither of them felt like sleeping. Ben put on a pot of coffee before trading his tux for pajamas. Rey followed suit, thankful to take off the heavy fabric.

“Here,” Ben said, sliding a mug of warm coffee across the counter to her. She took a sip, it was chocked-full of enough cream and sugar to make her teeth ache. She frowned. “Something wrong?”

“It’s too sweet,” she said. She looked up from her cup to Ben’s worried face on the other side of the counter. So swept up in her own pain she had failed to really acknowledge him. He was here, of course, making duplicates of keys and doing laundry and making dinner, but it didn’t give her the same butterflies as they had before. Before it wasn’t something she needed, but wanted. Now she relied so heavily on him that it scared her. What if he decided he didn’t like her anymore? What if he gave her up like her parents did? Emotions became tangled in her throat.

“Did I make a mistake?” she asked.

“Would you be happier if you played tonight?” Ben asked, softly.

“I like to think so. I always feel better when I play,” she admitted.

“You don’t have to be in an orchestra to play,” he said. “That’s the nice thing about music, no one can stop you from making it.”

“But this was music with a paycheck,” Rey said.

“Don’t worry about money,” Ben said, reaching over the table and taking her hand.

“No,” Rey said, jerking her hand away. “I know you’re trying to be nice and a good Alpha but I don’t want your charity.”

“It’s not charity, Rey.”

“I have nothing to give in return!” she said.

“I don’t want anything from you, I want to take care of you.”

“You understand that’s a tough concept for me,” Rey said, slouching over on her stool. “I’m not used to people giving out favors just because.”

Ben walked around the counter and slipped a warm hand against Rey’s cheek. She tilted her face up and met his dark eyes, leaning into his touch. His thumb wandered over her cheek, the gentlest of caresses.

“I’m not doing this as a favor or charity or out of pity. I love you, Rey. I love you so much it feels like I can’t breathe when you’re not around. You’re doing me a favor by being here.” He pressed a kiss to her cheek before slowly brushing his lips against her own as if asking for permission. She nodded and their lips met in a sweet soft kiss. “You’re my air.”

It felt like a stone had been lifted from her shoulders. A burden finally dropped and she could stand up straight without pain.

She slipped her arms around his neck, meeting his lips with a rough intensity that surprised even herself. Before long her legs were around his waist and Ben was carrying into the bedroom, their hands wandering under each other’s clothes desperate for a taste of warmth. His scent filled her nose and she enjoyed the comforting daze it layed over her heart. Not just any good smell, but the smell of her Alpha.

“I love you,” she said against his lips.

“Say it again,” he asked, his voice low.

“I love you, Ben Solo.”

He dropped her onto the bed and climbed over her, pinning her hips to the mattress with his own. His lips were on hers again, eager but gentle. It wasn’t long before her skin was flushed and her hips were bucking against him, desperate for more of him. Touch had been the first thing they truly understood about one another. It was easy to give pleasure with skin, and so much harder to find the right words to say. So Rey let her body speak for her.

Ben pulled off her shorts, his fingers slipping between her legs. Rey was not shy about her desire, grinding against his hand and letting the moans building in her chest free. He freed himself from his pajama bottoms, the tip of his hardened cock pressed against her entrance. Their eyes locked as he pressed into her, slowly and leisurely. A love that wasn’t rushed, a pleasure stretched out over minutes. There was no work in the morning, no empty apartments while Ben went to the building she could no longer follow him into. It would be the sheets she woke up in on some of the best days of her life. It would be a lazy weekend with her Alpha, her boyfriend, her partner. Her Ben.
He took his time, moving inside of her with a slow agony that made her toes curl. Rey closed her eyes, focusing on each slight touch of his hand and jerk of his hips. The warmth of his kisses, the taste of his skin on her tongue.

Old poems always refer to sex as two becoming one, but Rey had never truly felt that until that night. She was reminded she wasn’t alone in this city, that Ben was there. That he’d always be there. It was evident in his whispered praise, his careful caresses. In the shower they took together afterwards and in the protective arm he held over her waist as they finally went to sleep in the bleary hours of the morning.

It was there, listening to his breathing as the first rays of sun began to bleed through the curtains, that Rey had the first taste of home.

When they woke up in the late afternoon it was without guilt or anxiety about all the productive hours they had missed. Rey pressed her cheek against Ben’s chest and found even his heart made music.

“There’s something I should tell you,” Ben said, his fingers grazing her arm.

“Hm?” Rey mumbled, her eyes still closed.

“I quit.”

Rey jerked up expecting a joking smile but he was serious.

“Holdo wouldn’t let you,” she said.

“I made some compromises. I did the concert, I owe her a few favors, but I’m no longer affiliated with the Chandrila Philharmonic.”

“Why?”

“Do you really need to ask that?”

Rey blinked.

“You didn’t have to do that.”

“But I wanted to.” He pushed a lock of hair behind her ear, letting his fingers linger against her skin. “I only want to play with the best and the best isn’t there anymore.”

“That’s so corny,” she said, tears forming in her eyes. No one had ever called her the best, not even as a joke.

“So, what do you think?” he smiled.

“About what?” Rey choked, half a chuckle half sniffling.

“Would you be my partner?”

“What, do you want to start a band?”

“I want to make music with you, I don’t care what we call it.”

It was childish and she knew there was a high possibility it wouldn’t work out, but the confidence Ben held about it made her heart swell. The thought of performing with him, even if it was in a park for loose change, would be enough.

“Alright,” she said. “I accept.”

Chapter Text

Five Years Later

Under the harsh lights of the dressing room Rey checked the corners of her lipstick. It was a dark color that looked better than she could have imagined. She made a note to ask the make-up artist what the color was called.

There was a call for five until places and Rey went to the wings where Ben was already waiting, violin in hand. No matter how many times she saw him in his suit it still dazzled her.

“You look amazing,” she said, sliding an arm around his waist.

“You always say that,” he said, pressing a kiss to her temple.

“Because it’s true.”

A stagehand had set her cello case backstage and she carefully pulled it out. It wasn’t the instrument she used years ago in Jakku or in the orchestra, but a model Ben had bought for her birthday. It was older than the theater they stood in and added such body to her notes that she couldn’t play anything else in front of others. Her old cello was reserved for private performances for Ben.

She let her gaze linger on him again and found the edge of his collar had folded over.

“Lean down,” she ordered. He obeyed, bringing his face down to her to press a kiss to her cheek. Rey chuckled. “No, your collar is messed up.”

She pulled at the fabric and laid it flat. Ben frowned.

“You mean I don’t get a kiss?”

“I’ll get lipstick on you.”

“A small price to pay.”

Ben slipped a hand around her waist and pressed his lips to hers. Every kiss felt like coming home and this one was no different. It was amazing how after years he still had the same effect on her. They pulled apart and dark red was smeared across his mouth.

Rey grabbed his chin and ran a thumb across his bottom lip only for him to lean in and steal another kiss.

“Ben,” she tried to sound frustrated but it came out as a giggle.

“Sorry,” he said, not sounding at all apologetic. “You’re addicting.”

Rey leaned into him, deepening their kiss. His hand went to her collar, pulling at her blazer until the skin between her throat and shoulder was exposed. In the dim light backstage the scar was barely visible but they both knew it was there. Ben pressed a kiss against it.

Footsteps made them jump apart. Rey pulled her collar back into place in time for the stage manager to give them a signal that the show was about to start.

Silently, Rey grabbed Ben’s chin again and began rubbing her finger along his lips trying to remove the crimson makeup she’d left against his skin. She could feel his eyes watching her and there was no hiding the blush that came to her cheeks.

“Places,” the stage manager whispered.

Ben took Rey’s hand in his and together they walked across the stage, the heavy red curtain still separating them from the audience. They could hear the babble of conversation on the other side and it made her stomach flip. No matter how many shows they did there was always a moment of nerves at the beginning.

Ben squeezed her hand as they reached center stage.

“I love you,” he whispered.

She smiled, only half believing that the life they lived was real.

“I love you, too.”

The curtain rose and as the lights hit their faces the audience erupted into applause. It seemed they had sold out again as every chair was filled, with a few people lingering at the back on their feet. Hands gripped programs that read in big lettering Niima & Solo.

Rey sat in the chair set for her, and held her bow ready to dive into the music. She glanced at Ben and caught his eye. They both exchanged small private smiles; a moment that, despite happening in front of two hundred people, was only for them.

And then, together, they dove into the music.