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Insomnia wasn't a well-known thing for Scott. But to be honest, in this moment he couldn't imagine anything more perfect than staying awake. Sleeping is almost a waste of time, at least as long as he's lying in this bed.
Not his bed. This bed.
The first time he slept in this bed was six weeks ago, but it feels a lot longer. He's so familiar with the room, with the scent, with the light – with the boys behind his back.
He's lying on his right side and looks through the window, counting the streetlights over and over again. He squirms slightly now and then, trying to avoid waking up his beautiful lovers, as he tries to find a comfortable position for his aching back.
Okay, aching is a little exaggerated, to be honest. It's more stinging. But it reminds him of earlier that evening. The first time he challenged Mason.
He has always been a particular kind of a sub. He is loud, he is strong, he is powerful, he is proud. It isn't his nature to obey, he isn't pliant. No, he needs to be forced to submit. But he has never before found a man who was willing – or worse, who was capable – to fill his needs.
Mason is the first.
Scott smiles a bit when he remembers Mason's smile and Mark's frown when he declined a demand. Everything was right in that moment. Mason wasn't confused, he reacted completely relaxed and forced Scott into his place – the place he's wanted.
Scott loves to be childish, to be bratty, to be punished, to be forced. But he also wants to be pampered, to be cherished, to be adored.
He wants to be loved.
He has never met a man, a Dom, who understood all of these opposing needs. But Mason was different. He was his friend, his equal, his lover, and his Sir. Even the bare thought of this declaration arouses Scott and makes his back sting, reminding him that he'd refused to use the title to earn his punishment.
Scott smiles at that memory, he has to admit that he was just a little bit bratty, just to test Mason. But his Sir dealt with him so well, Scott can't wait to tease him even more. And more. And more.
The only problem – he doesn't know what Mark will think of it. Mark has been always the pliant sub who obeys any demand immediately . And Scott can't make any assumptions about what Mark is feeling about him being so different. They didn't spill the tea yet, but Scott has liked both boys for longer than just these 6 weeks. In fact, he likes them a lot, and he doesn't want to mess things up by being difficult.
He sighs softly and turns around, frowning a bit at the sting he feels in his back. He finds Mason lying flat on his back and Mark nuzzled to his side, his head resting on Mason's chest. Scott decides to mirror this position and places his head on the other side of the broad chest, his face just inches apart from Mark's.
"Is your back still hurting?" Mark's whispers, startling Scott. He hadn't noticed that his fellow sub was awake too.
"Not really, just a little bit", he answers as quietly as possible to avoid waking Mason.
"Should I put ointment on the marks?" Mark is looking a bit worried.
Scott smiles. "No, but thank you. It's not that bad, and to be honest, I like how it feels"
Mark mirrors his smile. "I was very impressed with how well you took the pain", he admits and earns a surprised glance.
"Oh, it didn't really hurt... I mean, it did hurt, but I also liked it a lot." They look at each other in comforting silence for a moment.
"So... you're kind of a masochist?"
"Well... Some would say the better term is 'pain slut', but I guess 'masochist' is right too..." Scott grins at the pet name Mitch gave him a few years ago. "What about you?"
Mark shakes his head very softly, aware that Mason's still sleeping. "I don't like pain a lot. It's a real punishment for me, but I love punishments including pain in a different way."
"Explain?" Scott asks curiously.
"Well... I love that I don't have to like it, Mason can do it anyway. Because I allow it. Because I belong to him. Because he owns me. That's what I like about physical punishments, not that they're physical by themselves."
Scott thinks about this information for a moment. "So... you're more into the mental part of being punished? Like... I don't know, the humiliation?"
"I guess. Even if it doesn't feel humiliating at all. I'm embarrassed when I'm in my subspace and I need to be punished, because I wasn't good. But I don't think it's really humiliating for me. Is it for you?"
"Not at all. Most of the time I'm just enjoying the pain or even the power Mason has when I'm in subspace. But... other punishments are much harder for me, more embarrassing ones, like... You know." Scott interrupts himself in the middle of the sentence, unable to put the things in his mind in words, even if they arouse him. But he can't admit it.
"I think I can imagine what you mean. But I don't feel the same, I think I'm just not as proud as you. Or perhaps I'm just more used to forgetting my dignity. Because I know that Mason will take care of me. And I'll never completely lose my dignity while submitting to him." Mark smiles very candidly and Scott nods in agreement.
"I've noticed that you're both very into aftercare. I love it too, it's so caring, loving... He cherishes you a lot," Scott says and Mark corrects his statement with "He cherishes both of us."
For a short moment they're just lying on Mason's chest in silence. "How is it for you? To share your boyfriend with me?" Scott eventually asks shyly.
"It doesn't feel like I'm sharing him," Mark answers and doesn't lose his smile. "Usually, sharing is different. When I share something, I will have less of it than before. But not this time. It's not like a cake, you'll get one half and I'll get the other." It feels like... Our feelings are just doubled. "And it doesn't feel like I'm sharing you."
"I'm not as sweet as cake?" Scott jokes and Mark raises his eyebrow.
"Sometimes, but sometimes you're just a brat." He hesitates a short moment. "What the hell were you doing earlier?"
"Uhm..." Scott shrugs and pauses a moment, a little afraid that he'll find out Mark's feelings about his bratty behavior sooner than expected. "As I said, I'm a pain slut. I wanted to feel pain and to challenge Mason, it's something in my nature, I don't know why I can't just obey."
"We're completely different", Mark determines.
"Is that a problem for you?" Scott asks anxiously and bites his bottom lip.
"No, of course not. We love it!" Mark's statement makes Scott let out a relieved sigh.
"I wasn't sure if it stresses you out, you didn't look very happy..." Scott trails off as Mark reaches out his left hand and put his fingers in Scott's hair, just to fondle it softly.
"I was worrying about you. Mason has always been a sadist, even if he couldn't satisfy that need with me. It was okay for him that I'm only able to bear light pain, but I know he misses it. Even if he has never mentioned it." His fingers wander and gently caress Scott's neck and his cheek while Scott relaxes and closes his eyes.
"I thought that you're asking for more than you can bear. I know that Mason is very careful and would never badly hurt one of us on purpose, but I didn't know if you were aware of what will – or what can – happen if you challenge him. Remember, I wasn't there when you discussed limits and stuff. I guess it will be easier for me now. Although it's always hard to watch, especially because I can't understand how good it feels for you. I'll always worry about you."
Scott opens his eyes and smiles happily which encourages Mark to go on. "And that's the reason why it doesn't feel like I'm sharing my love. It's just... doubled. The love I receive and the love I give are doubled. Both. I love you." He genuinely looks into Scott eyes, and Scott intertwines his fingers with Mark's where they are still caressing his cheek.
"I love you too. Both of you," Scott answers and closes his eyes.
For a short moment Scott is sad that Mason has slept through this conversation and the first time any of them say 'the three words' since Scott joined them, but on the other hand it feels right that he has had this moment with Mark, just the two of them.
Mark moves his hand, still interlaced with Scott's, from Scott's face to Mason's chest, right in the middle between them. For a while they're just smiling at each other before they finally close their eyes.
And Mason is just happy they haven't noticed he was awake and smiles, his eyes a little bit watery. But just a little bit, and who would blame him? He loves his boys too.