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Chapter Text

It was a quiet day in the Burrow. All the Weasley children, minus Percy because he was at his flat doing 'paperwork', were there. Even Charlie and Bill were home visiting their younger siblings. Molly and Arthur were away on a rare no-kid vacation now that just about all their children were grown, so Bill and Charlie came home to keep an eye on things and Fleur had decided to visit her parents for the week. They were celebrating the 2-year anniversary of the end of the war and remembering all of those who had lost their lives in the war. No one said a sound as they sat in the Burrow's living room. Harry and Hermione were not there for once as they both had business to attend to.

The silence was broken only by the sound of a light tapping on glass and a clicking type of noise.

It was Ginny who got up from her seat between her two eldest brothers and went to the living room's lone window where a grey Screech owl was impatiently tapping the glass with it's beak and making clicking sounds in the back of his throat to gain the attention of the room's occupants. Ginny opened the window and in flew the owl without a moment's hesitation. Now that the Weasley's got a better look, they could clearly see the owl was none other than Hermes, Percy's owl that he got for becoming a prefect during his fifth year at Hogwarts. It was amazing that he still had him anyways.

Hermes dropped a square shaped parcel with a piece of parchment attached onto the old, worn-out coffee table causing an audible 'thud' to fill the silent room. The owl gave them all a piercing look and Ron was the one to give him the crust from a sandwich he had been eating. Hermes gave a happy screech and snatched up the crusts, devouring them before flying out the still open window again.

They all stared at the little package and parchment.

"What do you think Percy sent us?" Ron was the first to speak as he looked around at his older and younger siblings. Ginny picked up the parcel and parchment. The ginger untied the parchment from the package and unfolded it.

"I don't think Percy sent this, it's not his handwriting. Percy writes a lot smaller and neater." Ginny frowned, the thought of someone else using her big brother's owl oddly disturbing her.

"Well," Charlie gave an encouraging smile to his baby sister. "What does it say?"

Ginny looked at the note again and began to read:

'Dear Weasleys,

I apologize for the abruptness of this letter and package, but I feel it is of utmost importance that
you see it. You see, Percy had invited me over for tea today so we could go over
some important files and documents and, of course, I said yes. While Percy was in the
kitchen making our tea I had happened to see a book sticking out from under
his sofa. Curiosity took over simply because as long as I've known him, Percy had always
treated his books impeccably well and would never leave one in such a place. So, I had picked the
book up and flipped through it. After looking through a few pages, it was obvious the book was
a journal or diary of some sort, all written in Percy's neat penmanship. Just after
reading a few paragraphs told me that no one, not me, not his friends and
not even you, his family, really knows the true Percival Ignatius
Weasley.

From what I was able to read quickly I was horrified. The things he's written about worried
me and, even though I knew he would blow up if he found out, I hid the diary
in my robes as Percy came back into the room with our tea. I asked could use his owl to send a
letter and Percy, being the gentleman he was, allowed me and I quickly wrote this letter and wrapped
up the book without Percy's knowledge.

I sent them off with Hermes to bring to you. I think it would be for the best of all
if were to read these entries. No one truly knows anything about Percy and
this frightens me.

Sincerely,
Kingsley Shacklebolt'

Not a sound was made as everyone took in this new information. Did they really not know anything about Percy? The idea made a sick feeling develop in their guts. The eldest Weasley took the parcel from Ginny and unwrapped it, revealing a red leather clad book with gold lettering emblazoned on the front reading: 'Percival Ignatius Weasley'. Snickers came from the twins.

"Wittle Percy has a diary." More snickers, but glare from Bill shut them both up.

"Wait," Charlie looked around the room. "Are we really contemplating reading our brother's most innermost, private thoughts?" He had to admit though, the idea of reading Percy's journal intrigued him but bothered him too. It was a complete invasion of his privacy.

"I guess we are," Ginny gave a small shrug and looked at her older brothers, none of them opposed. "Okay then, who reads first?"

"Lets do oldest to youngest." Fred looked at Bill for confirmation as he said this. The others nodded in agreement.

Bill gave a quiet sigh and glared at his brother but he agreed nonetheless.

He opened the book and immediately noticed Percy's neat, tiny and just plain perfect writing.

22 August, 1987

Charlie did the math in his head. "This is Percy's 11th birthday I believe." The others looked around at each other and Bill started to read the entry.

So, I got this journal today. It was a birthday gift from my Uncle Bilius. He had given it to me when no one else was looking saying that he didn't want my siblings to know lest they tease me or take it or read it.

The siblings all looked away from each other guiltily. That's exactly what they were doing now and would have done then.

He had told me it was enchanted so that no matter how much I write in it, it will never run out of paper. I love it. It was something I could keep my private thoughts in and vent to.

More guilty looks.

There isn't really much for me to say about today. I woke up and everyone sang happy birthday to me and my mother had baked a cake for me but I couldn't have any till after dinner. They sang happy birthday again and my Uncle Bilius had come to visit, giving me this journal or diary or whatever I should call it. It was a good birthday like every other year, bit boring though.

I've gotten a few gifts, not much but that's expected in a family as large as ours.

The Weasley siblings each made a strange, odd face.

The day was going pretty well too...Until Fred and George made my cake blow up in my face...

Said ginger twins started grinning and laughing. It wasn't long before the others joined in, remembering that particular evening.

Burning with embarrassment and cake dripping from my face, I ran up to my bedroom as tears stung my eyes. I could hear the whole family roaring with laughter which only led to further humiliation. I let out a choked sob as I slammed my door behind me, the noise drowned out by my family's laughter.

The laughter stopped immediately and surprised looks crossed all their faces except Fred and George's. Horror crossed the twins's faces.

"Did...did we make..." started Fred.

"Percy c-cry...?" finished his twin.

Sadness replaced shock. "It would appear so," Charlie whispered into the stunned silence.

"And we all laughed," Bill said as Ginny had tears welling up in her eyes.

"We're all such bloody wankers." Nobody could argue with the youngest brother. Bill continued reading.

At least my mum was chastising Fred and George, well attempting to at least. I could hear the laughter in her voice as I used a handkerchief to wipe my birthday cake off my face.

Guilty looks crossed the twins's faces, replacing the horror. They had ruined their brother's 11th birthday for him...It wasn't everyday you turned 11.

I looked over at Scabbers, my pet rat, as he made some noise from his cage. I smiled slightly and fed him. At least he never laughed or judged me.

Ron sneered at the mention of Pettigrew's rat form. He had almost forgotten that Percy had owned him before Ron had.

25 August, 1987

So I've been thinking of giving this journal a name,

A few snickers here and there.

something to make it easier to talk to almost.

A snort of laughter came from one of the twins.

After the past few days I decided that I shall call my new journal 'Confider'. The reason being because it's the only thing I've ever felt like I could open up to and let my innermost emotions and feelings out without being criticized and humiliated.

All laughter and snickering stopped as ashamed looks crossed the Weasley siblings' faces.

"He could have talked to us..." Ginny sniffled quietly and Charlie wrapped an arm around her.

"No he couldn't have...he's right" Fred had a pained look on his face. "We would have laughed and criticized him." No one argued.

I'm excited for tomorrow though. Mum is taking Bill, Charlie and I to Diagon Alley for our Hogwarts supplies. I can't wait to get my first ever wand.

Charlie and Bill couldn't help but chuckle as they remembered how excited Percy was to go to Diagon Alley.

26 August, 1987

Today could have gone better...

Frowns crossed their faces.

Like I wrote about yesterday, mum had taken Bill, Charlie and I to Diagon Alley for our needed school supplies. She had left me to get my wand from Olivander's wand shop while she took Bill and Charlie to get Bill's new books. Charlie would get Bill's old third year books and I would get Charlie's old first year books. I wasn't surprised or shocked though. So, as I was saying, I was left alone at Ollivander's to get my new wand. At least I get something that won't be handed down to me from an older brother that has no need for it anymore.

Everyone rubbed the backs of their necks and avoided looking at each other.

It took longer than I thought. Olivander seemed completely befuddled till finally we found a wand for me. Eleven and a half inches, rosewood, unicorn hair, springy. "Great for transfiguration," Olivander had said.

Everyone snickered at the memory of Percy's rosewood wand.

After purchasing my wand with the money mum had left me for it, I left the wand shop and was about to hurry to Flourish and Blotts where I agreed I would meet with her, only I ran into someone...I fell flat on my arse and looked up.

The snickers turned into quiet laughter.

The first thing I saw was bucked teeth...then an ugly sneer.

Fred and George looked at each other. "Could it be?" "I think so brother dear."

"Who is it?" Ginny had a bad feeling about this person and didn't want them anywhere near her big brother.

It was a boy, probably a second or third year by my judgement. "Watch where you're going!" He had just about barked out his words like a mutt.

Bill and Charlie clenched their fists. "How dare he talk to our Percy like that!" Charlie gave an infuriated huff and slouched against the couch as Bill gripped the book tighter and continued reading.

I was shaking slightly as I held my new wand close to my chest. For some reason this boy terrified me more than he should have.

Ginny bites her lip. "Oh Percy..."

He hauled me to my feet with one hand on the back of my robes. I couldn't help but admire his strength as I stared up at him. He reminded me of a modern day Adonis. My face burned at the thought.

Everyone stopped and looked at each other. "I-Is Percy..." Fred and George had odd looks on their faces.

"Nah," Ron waved his hand dismissively. "Remember Penelope Clearwater? He was absolutely nutters about her." Everyone nodded slowly and seemed appeased for now.

I didn't much so admire it after he hauled me down an abandoned alley. I was to stunned to even struggle against his pulling.

All the Weasley eyes filled with fury as they tensed and stared holes into the small book.

As he pulled me, I could see a name embroidered on his robes in green silk: Marcus Flint.

Fred and George began growling as the name left Bill's lips.

At least I knew this brute's name now.

A few forced chuckles.

He pushed me against a cold, stone wall and I dropped my wand. It skittered a few feet away in its box. After that, well, it wasn't pretty...

The boys started shaking in anger and tears welled up in Ginny's eyes.

At least he didn't hit my face. I'd hate for mum to notice, or any of my brothers. They'd probably make fun of me for being unable to defend myself.

Ginny started full out sobbing as looks of horror crossed the boys's faces.

"Does Percy really think we would have done that?" Charlie whispered his words and Ginny sobbed louder.

No one had an answer as color drained from their faces.

When Flint was done hitting and kicking me into submission, I forced myself up onto my feet and fixed my clothes. Thankfully, when I found my wand it wasn't broken or cracked or anything.

Ginny lets out a choked laugh mixed with tears. "He-He *hic* is w-worried about h-his w-and *hic* mo-ore than hims-self." Charlie kisses her head.

Because of my little 'incident',

Shouts of fury erupted all over the room.

"Incident?!"

"That wasn't god damned incident?!" Bill had to wait for everyone to calm down as he shook in fury and glared at the book as if it itself had attacked his little brother instead of the Slytherin brute.

I was late to meeting my mum and brothers. She scolded me and Bill and Charlie were glaring and saying how they didn't want to have to go look for me.

The twins, Ron, and Ginny all glared at their oldest brothers and Ginny elbowed them both. They at least had guilty looks on their faces.

I'm sorry...I didn't mean to get bullied and beaten...I'll try not to next time...

Ginny choked as another sob wracked her body and more than one of her brothers had tears stinging their eye.

"Oh Percy, I'm so sorry. So, so sorry," Everyone took a moment to calm down.

Bill and Charlie were snickering at the fact that my wand was rosewood and my other brothers were teasing me when we got home for it too. Dad and mum were even smiling. What's wrong with having a rosewood wand? I don't understand it...

More sobs from Ginny and guilty looks.

I took my school supplies and almost ran to my room, once inside I locked the door and cried into my pillow till dinner time.

Fred suddenly jumped up and ran from the room, returning with a piece of parchment and a quill with ink. "F-Fred?" Ginny wiped her tear-stained face with a handkerchief. "Wh-whats that for?"

"I'm marking down every time we make him cry so we can apologize," Fred wiped his eyes before he could let the tears fall. George took the parchment and quill, making two tallies on said parchment.

At least no one noticed my red and blotchy face at dinner.

Guilty looks crossed their faces. "H-How could we not notice...?" Ron choked out.

Later though, when I was changing for bed, I could see all the bruises and scrapes littering my chest and arms.

Fury replaced tears and more than one of the Weasley's jumped up, Percy's diary falling to the ground.

"We are going to pulverize him!"

Ginny watches her brothers. "At least wait till we're done reading...We can make a list of people to pulverize then." The boys grumbled and settled down, Bill picking up the fallen book and continued reading, almost growling out the words.

They had been aching all day but I had ignored like I continued to do as I laid in bed and pulled out this lovely journal. I should get some sleep though, my yawning keeps interrupting my writing. Goodnight, my Confider.

"P-Percy..."

The siblings all looked away from each other, horrified at how they treated their own brother.

Bill took a deep, shuddering breathe and turned the page.

28 August, 1987

My head is killing me today, Fred and George kept 'experimenting' with Merlin knows what and making explosions in their room. They kept me up all night with the noise.

Said twins frowned sheepishly and rubbed the back of their heads at the disapproving glares from their older brothers and younger sister.

How come I have to be the one to share a floor with them? I get a good night's sleep once in a blue moon. It sucks.

"We didn't think we were that loud..."

"Well, apparently you were."

I suppose I should be thankful though. I at least don't have to share a room with any of my siblings, though my room is quite small and cramped. It's fine though.

"Is it though...?"

Mum's calling me for breakfast, so I better wrap this up.

31 August, 1987

Tomorrow's the day!

Bill chuckled at his baby brother's obvious enthusiasm.

The day I get to leave for Hogwarts on the Hogwarts Express! I'm nervous about the sorting ceremony. I don't have any clue what house I'm going to be in. I hope it's Gryffindor, but only because I wouldn't be able to bear the disappointment from my family if I got sorted into a different house.

The room was so silent that you could hear a pin drop. A choked sob escaped Ginny's mouth and the twins had to wipe tears from their eyes.

"We...We wouldn't have been disappointed Percy..." Charlie had a devastated look etched across his face as his older brother reached over to pat his shoulder.

What if I get sorted into Slytherin!

A few of them managed some dry chuckles at the thought of Percy in Slytherin house. It was ludicrous.

That would be the end of me. Not only would I disappoint my parents and siblings, but I would also have to see that brute everyday.

The tears were replaced by glares and mumbled threats at the mention of that...that OGRE.

Oh God. I may just have a panic attack. My bruises from him are STILL healing!

Ginny's fingers itched, just begging to hit this boy. She wanted to wring his neck. A comforting arm wrapped around her frail shoulders.

"It's okay Gin, we'll make him pay."

Ginny gave a jerky nod and breathed in deeply to calm down.

Chapter Text

The siblings, still reeling over the first month, were quite somber. They had no idea Percy felt this way or how they made him feel and hurt him. They were all such bloody wankers to their brother and nothing they can do can change the past. Bill handed Charlie the book over Ginny's head and the second Weasley child cleared his throat before reading.

1 September, 1987

Today was, in lack for a better term, exhausting. Sure, today had been absolutely amazing, but I was so tired by the time we could retire to our dorms. This morning was hectic with Bill and Charlie packing things last minute.

Two said brothers blushed in embarrassment, but no one said anything. They've all done this.

I had already had everything double checked and packed last night.

Ginny smiled slightly. "Always the perfectionist.

We nearly missed the train with how late we were running. Mum had stayed home to keep an eye on the twins, Ron and Ginny while dad had taken Bill, Charlie and I to King's Cross Station. Probably a bad idea. Scratch that, definitely a bad idea. He got us lost at least five times. Usually, mum would go and take us all with, but this year Ginny and Fred are both horribly sick. It'll probably spread to Ron and George within the week.

The younger siblings all winced. Sure enough, Ron and George had both caught it and all four children were absolutely miserable.

Bill and Charlie left me to go sit with their friends as soon as we boarded, but that's okay.

Ginny slapped both her big brothers and started berating them in a fashion, much like their mother's. "How dare you two just leave him alone like that? I don't care what Percy says, it's not okay!" Charlie hurried to continue before she hit him again.

I find an empty compartment towards the back where I could read in peace. As the train left the station, the door slid open and a rather crumpled looking boy stepped in. "Mind if I sit with you? The other compartments are all full," was what he said. I just smiled and nodded. The boy gave a sigh of relief and dropped into the seat across from me. I pride myself on my manners so of course I introduced myself. I held out my hand and said, "I'm Percival Weasley, but everyone calls me Percy."

"I really do like his name."

"Sometimes I forget his actual first name."

The boy shook my hand and his smile sent butterflies to my stomach.

An uncomfortable silence followed.

"Guys..."

"Remember Penelope Clearwater! Remember!"

"I'm Oliver Wood."

The twins shared a grin and Charlie chuckled quietly. Of course he knew the two were in the same year, he just didn't really know how close they were.

I was worried about going through Hogwarts alone, but I guess those worries were for naught.

"Oh Perce..."

Oliver and I continued talking about anything and everything in the world. I listened intently as he went on and on about his favorite Quidditch team, The Montrose Magpies.

"Boo! Boo!" Ron cupped his hands around his mouth as he bellowed. The others let him go on for a good minute before both Fred and George hit him round the head.

I was never a fan of Quidditch like my brothers,

"How can he not be?! Quidditch is the best sport to ever live!"

but the way Oliver talked about it had me changing my mind.

The twins snickered. "Of course-"

"He was."

Oliver actually managed to make forget my nervousness about the Sorting with his Quidditch enthusiasm. But that feeling soon came back full force when the train pulled into Hogsmeade Station. Oliver didn't seem nervous, he just kept talking about Quidditch.

"How isn't he strangling him by now," no one answered Ginny's question, just chuckled and patted her head.

I guess I really didn't have anything to worry about as I got sorted into Gryffindor. It was almost a 'hatstall' as some of the older students called it. That happens when a sorting takes more than 5 minutes.

"I almost forgot how long it took him." Bill mused.

"Yeah, he sure did look pleased when he was placed, though."

The Sorting Hat wanted to put me in Ravenclaw, but that's not what I wanted.

The small group each shared a frown.

It's getting late and Oliver just threw his pillow at me telling me to go to bed.

More snickering from the twins, this time with Ron and Ginny, too.

Goodnight.

2 September, 1987

I'm writing during our midday meal in the library. I didn't much feel like eating.

Ginny huffed. "He was always so skinny and tiny! He needs to eat more!"

So far, today has been amazing. I love my classes and I can't wait to go to the rest of the them. Only one thing I didn't like.

"What wouldn't Percy like about classes?" Charlie hummed and turned the page.

The Professor's kept comparing me to Bill and Charlie.

"Oh..."

It wasn't in a bad way,

The two older brothers high-fived above Ginny's head, much to their sister's annoyance.

but I wish they wouldn't. I'm my own person and I can succeed on my own without having to live up to the expectations everyone has set for me.

The slight cheery mood automatically dissipated.

"Wow," Fred whistled. "Even at eleven, he was ambitious."

"Yeah," Charlie smiled fondly and gently thumbed at the pages before continuing.

I'll continue this later, It's time for my next class.

2 September, 1987-Continued

The rest of the day, for lack of a better term, sucked. The classes were still awesome, but everything else...Not so much...

"Oh no!" Ginny moaned and hung her head. "What happened?"

I ran into that Marcus Flint as I was heading down to the Great Hall for dinner.

"I knew it had to be something with him!"

"No you didn't George..."

"I suspected!"

He just smirked at me and asked how the bruises were healing.

Bill gripped the couch arm so hard, that it threatened to break under the pressure. The others were in much the same fashion.

"I am going to obliterate him!" Ginny's shout had them all jumping back out of distance.

I hate him so bloody much. I ended up skipping dinner. I wasn't hungry anyways.

"That isn't good." A frown marred Ginny's pretty face. "He skipped lunch and now dinner? He has to be starving." Worry gnawed at her insides.

I picked up a book from the library to read and went back to the Gryffindor common room. No one was there, so I had plenty of time to myself before dinner was over.

I liked being by myself, so it didn't really bother me.

"It should...It really should bother him..."

7 September, 1987

Today our Flying Lessons started

More than one Weasley whooped and fist-pumped the air.

and from the crack of dawn Oliver was bouncing around out dormitory and waking everyone up. Even during classes, he could barely sit still.  More than usual, that is.

"That definitely sounds-"

"-like our Oliver."

By the time 3:30 rolled around, he was on the verge of exploding he was so excited. Flying is the one class I haven't been looking forward to.

"Of course," Ron huffed, but there was no real annoyance in his eyes.

Just for the simple reason that I am terrified of heights.

Everyone stopped for a moment before silent realization dawned on them.

"That explains so, so much."

Oliver kept asking me all day what was wrong and, eventually, he wore me down and I confided my fear to him. It's funny. When I got you, I thought you were the only thing I could ever talk to, my confider, but, now, I'm finding it easy to talk to Oliver.

A quiet sniffle and Bill was wrapping his arms around his baby sister. "Why...Why can't he talk to us!" She wailed and big, fat tears began rolling down her cheeks. No one said anything, just let their sister cry her poor heart out. She wasn't the only one that wanted to.

Once Ginny had calmed down a good deal, Bill gave Charlie the go ahead to continue reading.

"Don't worry," he had said. "If you fall, I'll catch you."

"The twins did imitations of this and drew a bubbly laugh from their sweet sister.

His words brought butterflies to my stomach and I believed he would. I couldn't help but put my upmost trust into Oliver. I've never felt like this before.

"P-P-Penelope...Right? Right."

8 September, 1987

Merlin, everything hurts.

That first sentence automatically put them on edge and any humor or sadness was replaced with cold fury.

Even now, my hand is shaking as I write, but I feel as if I need to. I was leaving my potions class, when I ran into none other than Marcus Flint.

"He better not touch Percy." A dark look crossed the twins' faces.

He had pinned me against a wall and said some horrendous things about my family. I can't even right them down without my tears falling and staining the paper.

Rage made itself apparent on each of their faces. How dare he make Percy cry?!

I don't know what happened, I just lashed out and managed to get one solid hit to his nose.

Silence. Complete and utter silence. Then pandemonium.

"What?!"

"Percy actually hit someone?"

"That's our brother!"

Bill himself was surprised. He had never known Percy to react violently to anything someone had said, even about his family. A slow smile formed on his face. That was his little brother.

He didn't like that, but I was pleased at least to see the blood cascading from his nose like a waterfall.

The twins 'whooped' and fist pumped the air.

I sure did pay for that though. I refused to go to Madame Pomfrey in the Hospital Wing

"Idiot," Charlie scoffed quietly. "The bloody idiot."

and right now, as I sit righting on my bed, Oliver is shooting these strangely concerned looks at me. I feel touched.

"Awe," Ginny cooed quietly. "Oliver is so worried about him."

"He always has been when it came to Percy." George smiled softly.

"He has?"

"Mhm, the two of them were best friends in school. Attached at the hip, inseparable I'd say."

"Do they...like each other?" Bill was careful about broaching the subject as he turned his full attention to the twins.

"Not sure about Percy, but-" Fred began with grin.

"Oliver is as in love with him as they come." George continued. "At least in school that is, but we doubt the feelings have changed since."

They were silent until Charlie cleared his throat to continue reading.

When I came in through the portrait hole though, I did my best to avoid my brothers. I didn't want to cause a scene of irrelevant matters.

"I-Irrelevant?!" Ron spluttered and threw his arms up in the air. "How the bloody hell is him getting pummeled irrelevant?!"

Goodnight, Confider. Hopefully the pain fades by morning come.

Ginny sniffles and leans against Bill to hide her face in his shoulder.

15 September, 1987

It's been a hectic week and I haven't had the opportunity to write lately. Shame, I enjoy writing in you my Confider. Classes are going amazingly and I've already finished my essay assignment that we got today. It's not due till next week.

The twins begin to snicker and nudge each other. "Perfect Percy always has to be top of everything!"

"Enough you two." The look Bill sent them had both boys shutting their mouths instantly.

Everyday, I tend to go to the library for lunch

"Now that can't be good." Ginny huffs quietly and leans back in her seat. "Is he even eaten during lunch? Honestly Percy..." None of her brothers could deny that in that moment their baby sister reminded them scarily of their mother.

and, lately, Oliver has been coming with me for whatever reason.

"Awe." Ginny coos once again. "So sweet. If he really does love Percy, then they should be together now. He obviously cares about him."

"But...But Percy isn't...into guys...Right?" Ron seemed to be struggling for words and rub at his eyes.

"Even if he was, it wouldn't matter, right Ronald?"

"Yeah, of course. It's just...I don't see it..."

Charlie, highly uncomfortable with the subject of their brother's sexuality, continued reading before they could continue talking.

At first it irked me, but, now, I rather enjoy our time together during lunch.

"AWE!"

"Ginny, please..."

"But it's sooooo cute!"

I even look forward to it.

Ginny smiles evilly, her mind made up of a certain mission for the next time she saw her third brother. Him and Oliver would be absolutely perfect together!

On a more somber note, though, Marcus Flint has been getting worse.

The jovial mood seemed to dissipate instantly.

He hasn't been as physical,

More than one sigh of relief filled the room.

but still he's a never ending terror. At least he's in the year above mine, so classes are a reprieve from his actions. But still, what have I honestly done to make him hate me so?

"Oh, Percy." Bill shook his head sadly.

17 September, 1987

Oliver dragged me along to watch our House Quidditch Team's tryouts after classes.

"Of course he did..."

"He was there...?" Charlie frowned and lowered his book. "I never even noticed him in the stands..."

He was so excited he could hardly sit still. Charlie was already zooming around the pitch, no way would they be replacing him.

Charlie smiled to himself. His little brother had such faith in him when they were younger.

Charlie was in fourth year now and the Gryffindor seeker. Angelica Cole, the current captain, was in her seventh and final year and her goal was definitely to win the Quidditch cup this year. Apparently Gryffindor hasn't won since Charlie's second year, the year he became Seeker.

His siblings whooped and patted him on the back for the epic victory he had secured for their house in only his second year!

"You really could have gone professional, mate." Ron grinned and reached over to pat his shoulders.

"Nah. Besides, dragons are such better company than you lot."

"Oi!"

He won it for the whole team and I remember feeling nothing but proud when mum read us his letter.

Charlie smiled fondly and thumbed at the pages again. This was his little brother's, who written about how proud he was of his older brothers.

He doesn't seem to know that I'm in the stands...

Guilt gnawed at him.

Oliver is hoping to get on the team next year as their Keeper and eventually become captain. The whole tryouts, Oliver kept going on and one about my brother. He sure idolized him.

"He did?"

"You don't know the half of it..."

Anyways, we saw a few decent people get on the team, but my hopes weren't too high for the Quidditch Cup this year.

"Guess he was right."

Chapter Text

Fred made grabby hands for the book and Charlie reluctantly handed it over to his brother, thumbing at the pages one last time. Fred dramatically cleared his throat and held the book up as if he was scrutinizing Percy's perfect penmanship.

3 October, 1987

October.  Usually I dreaded the month of October, but that's only because Fred and George have made the month a living hell for me for the past two years.

Fred's voice faltered and he held up the book to hide his face as the other four people gave both him and his twin pointed, accusing looks. They all remembered when the two had pulled the occasional prank on each of them during October, but poor Percy to the brunt of their pranks, until he left, that is.

The whole month they would insist on pulling these nasty little pranks on people (mainly me) everyday leading up to midnight on Halloween.

I hate it more than I've ever hated anything.

The twins winced and felt guilt gnawing away at their hearts. They didn't think Percy hated their pranks that much.

The pranks they've pulled were humiliating and cruel.

Well, I suppose I should be happy this year at least. I'm at Hogwarts and they're still at home far away from being able to prank me. Thank Merlin.

"He's happy to be away from us..." George mumbled sadly and his shoulders drooped.

"Can you blame him?"

"No. No we can't..."

4 October, 1987

The leaves are beginning to change in color. I've always liked that about fall.

Bill smiled. He had forgotten how much Percy liked Autumn. It used to be his little brother's favorite season.

The changing leaves were always so pretty to me. I used to sit in the back garden and attempt to try and recreate the colors on an old notebook.

"Percy was always the sensitive type when he was younger," Charlie shared Bill's smile. "If he wasn't reading or studying, then he was sketching something on that ratty old notebook."

Ginny's eyes gleamed and the others turned their attention to Bill and Charlie. "I didn't know Percy liked to draw."

"Oh yeah. He was good to, it was the coloring he always struggled with. I have a few drawings he did for my birthdays at home in a drawer." Bill recounted every single piece of art Percy had ever given him, up until he just stopped when he turned 15.

"How come he's never made us anything?" Fred had the very nerve to pout and Charlie had to restrain himself from smacking him round the head.

"Are you honestly asking that? You all would have laughed and ridiculed him!"

Silence.

Their siblings each looked at the ground and nodded slowly.

"I'll...I'll just continue reading then..."

It never really worked out well and the colors just ended up being a muddy brown color.

Charlie and Bill smiled fondly again, recounting how frustrated little Percy would get when his art never turned out the way he wanted it too.

Oh well, I still enjoyed watching the colorful leaves float in the breeze at least. Watching them here in the courtyard wasn't the same and I felt oddly homesick.

"Awe." Ginny sniffled. "I forgot how scary and lonely it can be during your first year, far away from home." The others each nodded and patted their sister's back.

5 October, 1987

Oliver confronted me today after Flint had shoved me out of his way and onto the ground again.

Animalistic growling filled the small living room.

"Has he been doing this a lot?" I felt heat rise to my cheeks at the concerned, yet angry, tone of voice Oliver sported when he helped me to my feet again.

"Oh, does it matter?"

"Of course it does you bloody wanker." Ron threw his hands up in pure agitation and frustration that his brother was being treated in such away.

I had tried to wave it off even when my right elbow creaked in pain at the slight movement.

Bill and Charlie unconsciously cracked their knuckles as their eyes narrowed at the innocent little book in Fred's hands.

When I had fallen, it had taken the blunt of the force as I tried to catch myself.

"Of course it does!" The concern quickly fled Oliver's voice and anger filled it solely.

"Oliver really does care so much about him." Ginny smiles and clasps her hands together. "You said that Oliver loves Percy, right?"

"Oh most-"

"-definitely."

"Do you think he was in love with him from the very beginning?"

The twins shared a look and paused in thought.

"Well," Fred began. "In the beginning-

"-it could have just been-"

"-really strong feelings of-"

"-friendship that manifested themselves into-"

"-pure-blown love." The twins finished together and gave the others beaming smiles.

"It freaks me out when you two do that..."

"Sorry Ronni-kinns!"

"It isn't right!" I could only smile sadly at Oliver and shake my head.

"Yeah! You tell 'im Oliver!"

"It's okay. I can deal with it on my own." I turned to walk away from Oliver and pretended not to hear his next words.

"You shouldn't have to."

"You really shouldn't Perce..."

If he kept up like this, I might just cry myself to sleep.

"Percy, please don't." Charlie had coughed up his handkerchief, embroidered with dragon scales along the hem, and handed it to his crying baby sister.

10 October, 1987

I knew I shouldn't put anything passed Fred and George

The twins nodded all serious like. "He really-"

"-shouldn't."

when it comes to their pranking. I honestly thought I was safe at Hogwarts,

Bill stopped Fred from continuing. "What did you two do to him?"

"How are we supposed to remember?!" Fred held the book up like a shield between him and his angry older brother.

"We've done too many pranks to him over the years and this is just one in a million!" George pulled Fred so he could hide behind his twin. Bill looked like he was about to breathe fire and Ginny wasn't far behind him on that one.

"We're sorry?"

"Oh you will be."

The twins gulped and Fred hurried to find where he left off.

but, of course, I was wrong. The two menaces had sent me a letter from home and, like a fool, I opened it in the middle of the Great Hall.

"Big mistake."

"Quiet George!"

"Yes sir!"

Pink glittery powder exploded in my face and covered me from head to toe. My hair and robes immediately begun to change in color to a bright, sparkling pink.

Everyone blinked and turned angry glares to the cowering duo. "We sell that stuff at our shop! It doesn't last long! Honest!"

Laughter. Everyone was laughing and pointing at me.

Guilt continued chewing and tearing at their hearts and George got out the piece of parchment and quill, just waiting to mark down the for-sure tally of another time they made Percy cry.

Even my older brothers.

The angry atmosphere changed directions and was directed towards the two oldest Weasley children. Bill pulled at his collar and Charlie coughed into his hand.

The teachers were even trying to keep from snickering. The only person not laughing was Oliver.

Ginny smiled slightly and tried to remember the few moments she had seen Percy and Oliver together at school. They seemed so close.

I ended up running out of the hall as people continued to laugh at my humiliation. Tears were stinging my eyes and I continued to run and run and run through the corridors blindly.

George felt tears sting his own eyes as he marked that dreaded tally on the parchment.

I heard footsteps running behind me,

"I-I bet you ten sickles it's Oliver Fred."

"You're on..."

but I couldn't bare to let anyone see me as such a mess, so I ducked into the nearest door after turning a sharp corner.  Bad choice. I jumped into one of the bloody GIRLS' bathrooms!

As much as they hated it, they all busted out laughing at the circumstances. They shouldn't be laughing at a time like this, but they just couldn't help it! Percy's face had to of been just priceless.

Oh, Merlin! My face burned brighter and I would have opened the door and jumped back out of the room had there not been footsteps in the corridor outside.

The laughter slowly died down to quiet snickering every now and again.

So, in a very un-Gryffindor-like manner,

A few more snickers.

I found a stall in the back and hid in there with the stall door locked. I was very lucky that not a single girl was in there.

Ginny tilted her head. "Which bathroom is he in...?" Her brothers shrugged, but Ginny kept thinking about it.

I don't think I could live through any more humiliation. I sat on the dirty tiles and pulled my knees to my chest, finally letting out my quiet sobbing.

Tears weld up in more than one Weasley's eyes.

Even thousands of miles away, those terrors still find ways to humiliate and torment me.

George wiped his stinging eyes as he and his twin both hung their heads in shame at all the torture they put Percy through.

"Why are you crying?"  Her voice had nearly given me a heart attack.  When I looked up there was a girl floating there. A ghost to be more precise.

The Weasley's, just the boys actually, all let out low groans in the backs of their throats.

"Oh, not Moaning Myrtle!"

I recognized her from the stories Charlie and Bill would come home telling. This ghost in specific was Moaning Myrtle

More groaning just from the mention of her name.

who haunted the girls' bathroom and was constantly wailing away her woes to any unfortunate soul who happened upon her.

"She isn't that bad!" Ginny tried to defend the poor ghosts, but her brothers just groaned even louder.

"My...My brothers." I kept hiccuping and sniffling. I hate how it looks when I cry. I can never talk and I keep hiccuping.

The twins kept their heads down and Fred's voice was slightly muffled from the angle as he hesitated to continue reading.

"Did they do that to your hair and robes?" I nodded and used my sleeve to wipe away some of the tears. Myrtle settled next to me and wrapped a cold arm around my shoulders.

"How is that even possible?"

"Shut up, at least she's comforting him!"

If she lowered it any, then it would go clean through my body.

"Oh..."

It's odd. A cold, deceased and ghostly shouldn't feel so...so comforting. I liked it.

"Oh no!" George mock gasped in an attempt to lighten the mood. "What if she peeks on him too?!" It was meant as a joke, but, nonetheless, Ginny jumped to her feet in a rage similar to their mother's.

"If she DARED to peek on Percy of all people, then I will personally find an exorcist to get rid of her!"

"Ginny, calm down." Bill grabbed his sister by the wrist and tugged her back down between Charlie and him.

"NO!"

It wasn't like the comfort a mother could give you,

"Nothings like when mum comforts us."

but more like the comfort of the big sister I've never had.

"Awe." The boys all blanched at the complete 160 Ginny's mood did. From fury to cooing.

"Well, it looks like the pink is fading now."

They sighed in relief.

I looked at the toilet and caught my reflection in the porcelain. It was true at least. The pink was slowly disappearing and my hair was turning back to its natural red color. I smiled slightly and wiped some more of my tears again. "I-I should go."

Myrtle only smiled at me and nodded. "Feel free to come back whenever you're upset, I'll listen."

"She's really so sweet." Singularly, each person present let a small smile flit across their features.

"Thanks Myrtle." She seemed to beam at the fact that I hadn't called her anything foul. At least I think she did. I fixed myself and Myrtle checked to make sure no one was in the hallway for me before I left.

"And so considerate."

I somehow felt so much better after talking with Myrtle of all people. It was nice. I actually skipped my classes for the day and hid in my dormitory for the rest of the day.

Gasps filled the whole room.

"Armageddon!" The twins were screaming like loons and jumping up on the furniture.

"Total anarchy has fallen!" Slowly, Bill raised his wand and muttered a small jinx that had both twins flailing and falling straight onto their asses.

"No-"

"-fair!" Rubbing their backs, both twins took their seats.

When Oliver came in around lunchtime, he just about pounced on me.  I laughed as we both fell back on my bed and he refused to let go.

"Classic-"

"-Oliver."

"I was so worried Percy. I went looking for you, but I couldn't find you and you weren't in classes-" I lightly shoved him and smiled.

"I'm fine Oli."

I swear his face turned redder than my hair.

"Even at eleven, Percy unintentionally flirts."

16 October, 1987

Oliver has been acting weird around me since then. I don't know why. It worries me, maybe he's getting sick?

Ginny literally woos. "Maybe it's the love bug already!"

"Ginny...They're 11..." Ron sighed in exasperation and slouched in his seat as he gave his younger sister a look.

"It's never too early."

All her other brothers groaned.

20 October, 1987

My mum's birthday is coming up soon. I don't know what I should get her? Maybe just transfigure something? Oh, I don't know.

"Percy always did put so much thought into gifts..." Charlie smiles fondly and feels the urge to just apparate to his younger brother's flat and hug the life out of him.

22 October, 1987

Bill frowned at the date.

Flint cornered me again

"Oh no..."

before one of my (horrendous) flying lessons. I honestly was considering faking a stomach bug or something,

Fred chuckled nervously. "Percy faking being sick? That's a riot."

"Yeah," Ron grinned slightly. "He's absolutely nuts if he thinks Madame Pomfrey wouldn't know he was faking.

but Madame Pomfrey would know I was faking.

"Called it."

At least I didn't have to fake anything. I was a bleeding and bruised mess by the time I stumbled towards class.

Ginny clenched her fists and choked on a sob. "I wanna make that horrid boy wish he was never BORN!"

Bill pulled his sister into his side and mumbled quiet, soothing words into her ear to calm her down.

Madame Hooch automatically forced me towards the Hospital Wing. Both Madame Hooch and Pomfrey asked what happened and I just blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

"This'll be good."

"The stairs moved suddenly and I fell down them."

Even in the tense situation, more than one of them choked on a laugh.

"Out of all the excuses-"

"-he chose the stairs."

Both woman just blinked at me and I could tell they didn't believe me. Madame Pomfrey wanted me to stay the night and Oliver managed to sneak in and drop off my bag from where I left it on the grounds.

Ginny smiled softly and slowly stopped her blubbering. "He's...He's a good friend to Percy."

"He really-"

"-is."

He said he figured I would want to try to study to pass the time.  My confider was at least inside too. Charlie and Bill stopped by  after some other Gryffindor first years told them I was here. I gave them the same story.

Bill's eyes widened and he muttered, "I knew the date seemed familiar." His siblings looked at him.

"Oh yeah," Charlie sighed quietly. "He begged us not to tell mum and dad, 'cause he didn't want them worrying about it."

I got clumsy and fell down the stairs. Charlie joked with Bill about how clumsy I was, but Bill didn't joke.

Almost everyone threw some form of couch pillow at the second oldest.

They stayed for awhile until they were kicked out. Madame Pomfrey is telling me to lay down now.

23 October, 1987

I wasn't allowed to leave the Hospital Wing until lunch the next day.

"He must of hated that."

"Oh, he did."

Oliver didn't believe my whole story about falling down the stairs either.

Ron chuckles and slowly shakes his head. "Of course he didn't."

I caught Flint's eye in the Great Hall

Cue the protective big brother growling.

and his just smirked at me. I never thought I would hate someone as much as I hated Marcus Flint.

Ginny shook her head and mumbled a wow.

30 October, 1987

It's my mum's birthday and I hope she like what I sent her a few days ago.

"Of course she will."

Hopefully she got it on time. I found an advanced transfiguration book in the library and managed to transfigure one of my quills into a nice necklace for her.

Charlie whistled. "Percy was always good at transfiguration."

Ron snorted. "What wasn't he good at?"

"Flying apparently."

"Fair point."

It took me days to finally get it right and I managed to show Professor McGonagall. She was honestly so impressed that she gave Gryffindor 50 house points!

All of them whooped, except for Bill, he just smiled in a manner that only befitted a proud older brother.

I never felt so proud of myself. I only hope that mum will be as proud when she reads the letter I sent too.

"Oh, Percy." Ginny smiled sadly. "You need to stop doubting yourself..."

31 October, 1987
Halloween Day...

Surprisingly, the twins haven't sent another prank

They sighed in relief at the fact they won't receive any more death glares for the moment.

since that whole debacle earlier this month. I was beyond thankful. Today was just a normal day until I walked into the Great Hall.

"Here we go."

I was in awe. The entirety of the Great Hall was covered in Halloween decoration from the floor to the roof. Floating candles, giant pumpkins. It was awesome.

"I think we all felt the same way when we first saw in first year." Bill chuckles under his breath.

Oliver and I ended up stuffing our faces with those pumpkin pasty treats. They've always been my favorite.

"I thought Percy hated pumpkin?" Ron looked around at the other former Gryffindors and Bill narrowed his eyes at the small book.

"He does."

Chapter Text

George snatched the book from his twin, who glared at him, and turned the page to continue where Fred had left off from.

4 November, 1987

The first Quidditch game of the school year is coming up

"Whoo!" The twins both high-fived much to the amusement of their fellow siblings.

and Oliver refuses to sit still in any of our classes.

A few snickers came from the younger siblings who knew Oliver much better than the others. Some things just never changed.

He's insufferable I swear. It's almost amusing watching him. More than once he fell off his chair during classes.

"That sounds about right."

The teachers, though, were not amused in the slightest. Professor McGonagall sent him out of class so I took the liberty to grab his work for him.

Bill smiled fondly and rubbed Ginny's back. "He was always a lot more thoughtful than any of us ever gave him credit for."

Besides Oliver's obvious enthusiasm, I was excited myself for the upcoming game

That did surprise the majority of the Weasleys. They have never known Percy to ever look forward to a Quidditch match.

as I have never seen Charlie play an actual Quidditch game with anyone but our brothers. It would be a new experience, to say the least.

"Awe, he's excited to see you play!" Ginny grinned and nudged her second brother with her elbow in the ribs.

Charlie chuckled and ruffled Ginny's hair, making her squawk in indignation.

5 November, 1987

The others in my dormitory, mainly Oliver, are honestly counting down the hours. It's just a game.

"Oh! The injury!" Fred fanned himself dramatically and feigned fainting against his twin brother. Said twin was being just as dramatic.

"The insult! Just a game?!" George leaned heavily against his 'fainting' brother.

"Okay you two, I think that's enough." Charlie reached over and boxed both George and then Fred's ears, making the two whine and rub their ears. Well, George rubbed the only one he had. while he went back to reading.

Sometimes I just don't understand people.

Bill reclined in his seat and stared at the book intently. He had a feeling they were about to hear something a little more personal, and he wasn't wrong.

It's like I'm on the outside looking in, trying desperately to understand something my brain simply wasn't meant to.

Ginny and Charlie both shot the twins and Ron matching looks that dared them to say something, but the looks weren't really warranted as the three youngest brothers stared solemnly at the journal in George's hands.

Maybe that's why I never feel particularly close to my brothers and sister, or even my mum and dad for that matter.

Ginny was sniffling by now and leaning into Charlie's side for some sort of comfort. The others just had their heads hung with the exception of George and Bill. George, who was still reading, and Bill, whose eyes haven't left the book.

Something must be wrong with me.

It was Ron that commented first. "Nothing...nothing's wrong with him...Damn it, Percy..."

I can pick things up pretty quickly, but people, people are different from knowledge. They feel too strongly, latch onto things they know will never last.

"Wow...Percy really knows how to write. He...He should be a poet." It was a shoddy attempt at a joke on Ginny's part, but her brothers at least cracked a few smiles.

People are odd.

They terrify me.

'Percy...Is this truly how alone you've felt?' Bill kept his thoughts to himself, not wanting to upset his siblings even more.

6 November, 1987

For the up and coming game tomorrow between Slytherin

A lot of booing from various Weasleys (mainly Ron though).

and Gryffindor, Professor McGonagall actually let us off the hook on any weekend work.

Ron tossed his hands up into the air. "I wish she would have been that lenient with us! It's total bollocks!"

Bill rolled his eyes and lightly kicked his brother's shin to get him to shut up so George could continue on with the month of November.

Between you and me Confider, I think she was too focused on a bet between her and the other heads of houses to want to worry about grading.

Ginny grinned with the twins. "I always knew she kept betting on the games. I swear I've seen her trading Galleons with other teachers after games on a multitude of occasions!"

Charlie laughed under his breath. "She did that before any of us even got our Hogwarts letters."

"How old is McGonagall?"

"No one knows and don't ever try to ask, heh. Right, Charlie?"

"Shut it, Bill."

I learned quickly within my first few weeks at Hogwarts that despite it being enormous with possibly how many hidden rooms and corridors

Fred and George traded identical conniving looks

(that I have yet to find any of, mind you),

"Did he actually try to find some?" Fred nudged his twin.

"Maybe he wasn't as much of a goody-goody in the beginning."

Bill waved his hand side-to-side in an 'ehhhh' gesture. "He had his mischievous moments, you all did."

"But, Percy?"

"Even Percy."

there truly are no secrets among the Hogwarts halls.

Ain't that the truth.

It wasn't hard to find out about the bet for one, just ask the right portraits.

Ginny giggles. "Especially the red lady in the third-floor charms corridor. She loves to gossip with the ghosts and other portraits."

It also wasn't hard to find out about Bill's secret girlfriend of two years

Bill choked on his own spit and started coughing into his fist. "He knew?"

Charlie looked over and raised a brow at his only older brother. "You had a girlfriend and didn't tell me? I feel hurt." His grin betrayed his words.

The twins were snickering and Ron and Ginny hid their smiles behind their hands. "Okay, okay. Stop it, all of you. George, keep reading before I start hexing."

"Aye, aye captain!"

or Charlie trying to sneak creatures from his Care of Magical Creatures class up into his dormitory,

Said redhead's ears turned red at knowing Percy knew about all of his secret smugglings.

"Charlie! You could have been expelled!"

Bill whapped him around the head and Charlie let out an indignant huff. "But I wasn’t though!"

"But you could have been!"

"But I wasn't!"

Ginny pinched both Bill and Charlie's sides, making them both hiss and glare at her. "Stop it you two, you're both pretty."

or even that Professor Dumbledore and Professor Kettleburn know about my brother's creature smuggling.

"How'd they know?! I thought I was good at keeping it a secret..." Ginny rubbed his back in a comforting fashion.

You just need to know who to ask, some of them are just dying to spill what they see. I think the more motherly paintings are trying to prevent the rest from telling me too much about what they see.

"Oh my." Fred and George waggled their eyebrows, making Ron, Ginny, and Charlie laugh as Bill just rolled his eyes in amusement.

I wonder what's so bad about what they aren't allowed to tell me? I'll figure it out eventually.

Charlie tossed his head back and laughed louder. "Oh, I forgot how innocent his 11-year-old mind was. Oh, Percy."

7 November, 1987

Joy...today is the first official Quidditch match of the year

A few too many of the Quidditch fanatic family began to whoop and holler.

and you could feel the buzz throughout the castle. I barely saw Charlie all morning and Bill was trying to help coax his now-not-so-secret girlfriend (who I found out was one of our team's beaters),

Charlie grinned at his older brother, waggling his eyebrows and reaching over to pat Bill on the back. "Which one was it? They were both girls that year, Betty or Rosa? My guess is on Rosa, I remember Betty looking like she could tear your dick off during a handjob. Unless you're into that sort of thing?"

Bill tipped his head back and closed his eyes to calm himself before he ended up hexing his brother. "It was Rosa, not that it's any of your business Charlie." And here Bill thought the second oldest was responsible, but, in reality, he could be just as bad as the twins and Ron. That should probably surprise him more than it does.

down the steps, so she could join the rest of the team at the pitch. I asked Bill what was wrong and he just said his "friend's" anxiety was acting up before the game.

Yeah, 'friend'.

A faint blush formed on Bill's face as he glared at the snickering group around him. "Anyone who so much as mentions this to Fleur will absolutely regret it." The threat hung in the air, but his siblings just had various coy/smug smirks on their faces as George continued to read.

At breakfast, I don't think Oliver even tasted his food. He had been going on about the upcoming match all week. It would be the first-ever Quidditch match he would see live.

Ginny cooed quietly at how cute she thought a young Oliver's excitement was for such a simple game. Not that she could blame him.

There were so many people piling down to the pitch and settling in the stands. A large mixture of first to seventh years with just about all the professors/staff members. I didn't realize how big a deal Quidditch was at Hogwarts until today.

"Of course it's a big deal!" Ron seemed beyond exasperated with Percy when his brother wasn't even there to defend his past self. It was kind of funny, particularly in George's opinion as he lightly kicked Ron's shin to get him to shut up so they could continue on with the journal.

We made our way into the Gryffindor stands. It was quite crowded.

I hate being crowded. It's usually why I prefer to stay in my room at the Burrow.

Fred nudged his twin and grinned. "And here I thought he was just always studying and being an obnoxious brat. His two favorite hobbies." Gorge snickered in reply, both ignoring the glares sent their ways by their fiery baby sister.

My own space all to myself. The majority of my clothes and books were all hand-me-downs, as was just about everything else I owned. I think the first thing I ever got that was mine first would be my wand. And I treasured that fact.

All the Weasley Children knew the feeling, even Bill and Ginny. The majority of their hand-me-downs from childhood came from older cousins and other family members that had no need for them anymore though.

The point is that I never get anything to myself. I'm just happy I have my room. A little place to escape to when I'm home.

Ron scratched the back of his head and slouched in his chair. "Did he really hate being around us that much?"

"I wouldn't say hate," Charlie glanced at Bill out of the corner of his eye, who just shrugged his shoulders and rubbed Ginny's back. "He was never a fan of crowds or crowded spaces. Hated them in fact. He always has."

Anyways, Oliver and I had managed to snag seats in the first row of the stands. I tried to convince him to sit a few rows back, but he wasn't having it. Charlie had once warned me of the dangers of sitting in the first row.

Charlie shared a grin with the twins. He didn't know why he liked it whenever Percy mentioned him in his diary. It just made him happy, knowing his baby brother thought of him.

That was what he called the bludger zone, as in there was a good chance the bludgers could slam into the stands if the beaters weren't fast enough.

"We were always - "

"-fast enough."

"I'm sure," Bill said dryly.

"I can tell you that name stuck to the front of the stands because of Bettie and Rosa." Charlie chuckled under his breath. "They were pretty damn good at knocking the bludgers into the other teams but were pretty damn slow too."

The game was interesting from the get-go.

A few leaned forward, eager to hear if/how Percy would describe the Quidditch game.

Slytherins and Gryffindors players alike were yelling and screaming insults at the other team,

'Some things just never changed,' Bill smiled and tossed his arm to lay along the back of the couch and his other arm to rest on the armrest. He wouldn't have thought Percy would pay attention to the game, just bring a book to read because Oliver had dragged him there against his will.

even as they mounted their brooms and rose in the air. Charlie

Again the second oldest smiled at the mention of his name.

rose higher than his teammates to stay out of their way while he could try and catch sight of the golden snitch. The air was tense as Madame Hooch entered the center of the pitch with a box. The second she set it down and opened it, two bludgers zoomed into the air along with the golden snitch that was nothing more than a blur. The quaffle soon followed, tossed into the air by Madame Hooch.

And the game was on.

Of course, Charlie remembered the outcome of this particular game. It wasn't the worst game he had ever played, but it sure wasn't a fond memory of them losing.

It was a headache just trying to keep up with all the fast-moving players as well as the quaffle and bludgers, forget about trying to see the snitch.

"Poor Perce, Oliver must be screaming in his ear."

Every time someone scored cheers erupted from their house, plus any members of other houses that supported them. Gryffindor was up by 20 points, leaving Slytherin behind at 30. I could hardly think with all the yelling and screaming surrounding me.

"That tends to happen." Charlie reached over to lightly whap the elder twin around the head, making the jokester grin and stick his tongue out like when they were children.

It made me want to leave, to run away from truly everyone, and hide in my dorm.

"He really didn't do well with crowds, did he?" Ginny looked up, switching between looking at Bill and then Charlie a few times. It was Bill that finally answered when both brothers kept glancing at each other without saying a word.

"No, he hates them. Hates being crowded and hates all the loud noise. It confuses him and he can't think straight." They were quiet for a few good minutes, no one knowing quite what to say to that bit of information until George broke it by clearing his throat and reading the next sentence.

I didn't like all the noise, nor the vibrations of the stands as people stomped and jumped every time a goal was made.

It was making me anxious and, for a moment, I felt like I couldn't breathe.

Ginny gnawed at her upper lip, worrying the delicate skin between her teeth. "Is he going to have a panic attack? Do crowds and noise bother him that much?"

Her older brothers glanced at one another than at their sister, followed by looking at their brothers. "Well," Bill coughed and shrugged his shoulders. "He doesn't mind them so much anymore, at least I don't think so, but Percy used to cling to us or mom and dad when we were younger and in public crowds."

This did little to give their siblings any relief from their worrying about younger Percy. It may have been in the past and they couldn't help him out now, but that didn't mean they still didn't worry.

George continued quietly.

At this point Slytherin had made two more goals somehow, tying with Gryffindor at 50 points each.

Ron gave a half-hearted boo.

Oliver was just as loud as everyone else, occasionally bumping my shoulder and pointing out moves some of the players were pulling.

Fred nudged George and they shared a knowing, yet fond, smile for their elder brother and former captain.

I couldn't hear him over the roar of the crowd. It was so loud and it made my head throb.

Ginny continued to gnaw at her lips, almost tearing the skin from the pressure.

I raised my head, spotting Charlie zooming around the pitch casually as he kept watch for when the snitch would appear. He seemed so cool and collected,

"Why couldn't you have acted like that off of the pitch, instead of giving me premature grey hairs?" Charlie gave his older brother a teasing wink accompanied by a grin.

"Hogwarts wouldn't have been as much fun then."

"It wouldn't have been more endurable though."

"You love me!"

"Regretfully."

despite having the most stressful and strenuous position on a Quidditch team. It was admirable how well he did under pressure.

"Doesn't even like the game and he understands it better than most people."

Gryffindor managed to snag the lead again,

Fred and George hi-fived each other before their younger brother and sister, whooping loudly.

staying just ahead of Slytherin at 70 points. Each time a Gryffindor chaser scored, the Slytherin keeper would get so mad and punch the air. It was honestly kind of funny to me.

"Jacks was always a sore loser in school, other than that he was pretty much a solid guy for a Slytherin."

Ginny, with the twins' help, managed to make Charlie laugh from the astounded faces they were sporting.

"What?" He laughed and grinned, amusement flooding his voice. "I had inter-house friendships!"

"But Slytherins?!"

"Yes, a few Slytherins were my friends. Now hush up, I want to hear the rest.

It was almost half an hour of nothing but chasing each other around the pit, beating bludgers at the chasers, and stealing the quaffle back. It was like they were all going in circles with no one scoring. I felt like my head was going to explode from all the noise that made my ears ring.

Ron both winced. "He usually always went to Quidditch matches in school though, if the first one he went to was this bad, why'd he keep going?"

George turned the page and spoke before starting to read again. "Even if Oliver's feelings aren't reciprocated, he still was Percy's best friend. He would always go to support him in the games. Win or lose."

"Awe." Ginny was cooing again, making more than one of her siblings cringe.

It was getting to the point where I was going to stand up, make an excuse to Oliver, and then leave for the dormitories.

Only the commentator had caught my attention for once.

They all leaned forward, even more, eagerness written on their faces to hear what was going to happen.

"Weasley's off! He must see the snitch!

Charlie, despite liking it when he was mentioned in his brother's journal, sulked as the old memories of that game began to surface.

Cormier is close behind! They're neck and neck people!"

Ginny had gone back to gnawing at her lip with her fists clenched in anticipation.

I found myself leaning forward in my seat, eyes wide as I watched my brother go into a nosedive,

Everyone, besides Charlie that is, held their breath.

then pull up and skirt around the edge of the stands, arm outstretched in front of him. The Slytherin Seeker, Cormier, was just a few inches behind. Almost.

Almost. It really was a close call, but that didn't make Charlie feel any better about it.

Cormier pulled ahead suddenly and his hand closed around the snitch.

The gathering of gingers let out varying sighs of disappointment, slouching in their seats and moods dropping a tiny bit more.

He rose in the air, fist held high with the little golden ball in it.

I was surprised at how disappointed I was.

"See, even for someone who claims to hate Quidditch as much as he does, Percy still enjoyed the game somewhat. I guarantee it.

Gryffindor had lost, but I really didn't much care for the game anyway.

"You spoke too soon Ronnie-kins."

"Shut the bloody hell up George."

It was quite a big blur from there. I hardly remembered leaving the stands. I do remember trying to get Charlie's attention though as he was heading for the locker rooms, but he was gloomy and I felt it better to leave him be for the moment.

Said brother sulked and slunk farther down in his seat, ears red and grumbling as his siblings tried to comfort him over his years-old loss. It helped very little.

My legs felt like jelly as Oliver and I made our way to the common room. Another blurred passing of time I couldn't remember much of.

"He can remember just about what anyone says to him that day, but not the actions he did?" Bill chuckled fondly and shook his head, mirth shining in his eyes.

I was just glad to relax in bed. I took a short nap, just enough to recharge. I woke up not too long ago and here we are, me writing in you while my dorm mates head off to dinner.

Despite my anxiety during the match, it wasn't too bad and I'm already feeling much better.

"See!" Ron declared, pointing a finger at George, whose eyes widened at the sudden outburst. "He still liked the game!"

Before the two could get into any sort of argument, Bill snapped his fingers at the too and pointed to the book still in George's clenched hands.

I should head down for dinner now, lest I forget to eat again.

"Did he forget to eat a lot?" Ginny's question was directed at no one in particular, but Charlie answered it anyway.

"Well, he probably would have if not for mum when he was home. She always made sure he came down to eat at every meal, despite what he was doing."

13 November, 1987

I don't know how to feel.

That type of beginning to an entry never bodes well and Bill felt a knot beginning to form in his stomach at what it could mean.

I haven't been able to bring myself to write about this since it happened. I don't know what it means or why she did it.

He was right, something had happened to his young brother and he had no idea what, not even a clue. This wasn't good. Who had hurt his brother? The thought of anyone hurting him made the blood in his veins boil.

I don't understand and it scares me.

Percy...

Ginny had begun to cry quietly once more, wiping at his eyes with Charlie's handkerchief still clutched in her hands.

I'm not making any sense, even if you could never respond and I'll always know what those words mean. I just really need to tell someone or something, but I could never tell Oliver this, let alone my family. How could I?

Charlie’s jaw was twitching. Someone had hurt his baby brother, someone had scared him so horribly that he couldn’t even comprehend talking about it to his best friend, nor his family. He wanted whoever had done that to pay. To feel the pain that they had made Percy feel.

A calming hand covered his and Charlie looked down to see the understanding look in Ginny’s tear-filled eyes. That brought clarity back to his rage-fogged mind.

He wasn’t the only one angry, he wasn’t the only one hurt by what had hurt their brother. They could handle this together, they could help Percy if they worked together. He took a deep breath and nodded at George.

No one missed the way the younger twin’s hands shook or the way his hands dug a little too hard into the cover of the diary.

They all felt it.

Earlier this week, Tuesday to be exact, I went to all my classes like usual after breakfast, waved hello to my brothers when I passed by them in the corridors, ate lunch in the library with Oliver. 

The day went downhill as I walked into my DADA class. I liked (notice the past tense) our professor,

The silence in the usually rambunctious Weasley home could raise goosebumps on your flesh, the kind of silence that made your nerves go haywire like you just knew something horrible was going to go wrong while watching a horror film.

“His professor…” Ron whispered into the quiet. “Who was his first-year DADA professor?”

“The better question is how could a professor make Percy feel like that.” George scoffed and placed his elbows on his knees, leaning forward and staring at the ground between his feet before looking at the words and paper again. “What the hell did she do to him…?”

Charlie and Bill shared a look, but neither said a word. They just wanted to know and wanted everyone to shut the hell up so they could find out what this professor did to their baby brother.

a slightly overbearing, yet very pretty, woman with auburn hair and a single streak of grey through it. She was (more past tense) nice to me despite the negative comments I heard from older students. 

Bill choked on his own spit. He knew that woman, his memory clearing as her slightly blurry image filled his head. He knew her, he had her. She really could be awful when she wanted to be, and if she had done anything to Percy then he would...he would...He didn’t know what he would do, but it would be without mercy.

Her name is Gila Shrew and she seems to really care about what she's doing at Hogwarts.

At least I thought she did, I'm not so sure anymore.

“If she did anything…” The threat died on George’s lips, his back hunching as he leaned further onto his elbows, his leg bouncing as he fought the urge to stand and pace.

“I know Georgie, I know.” His twin mumbled into his ear as he watched George turn another page, starting up again.

I don't know why I'm so upset, she said it wasn't a big thing, just a touch.

Ginny burst into tears again, unable to hold them back as the floodgates opened. She buried her face in her hands and leaned into Charlie’s side, her sobs shaking her small frame violently and her cries filling the otherwise silent room.

“Just a touch,” Ron echoed as he stared blindly at the old peeling wallpaper on the other side of their living room. Just a touch. That’s what happened. She had touched their brother, she had hurt him emotionally.

That's all she did at the time.

Ginny’s sobs grew louder and all her brothers could do was hold her, they didn’t know how else to soothe her.

As class had ended, Professor Shrew had called me back and asked me to stay behind. Oliver was willing to wait for me, but I had told him to go on ahead. I kind of regret that now. 

Ron’s hands were balled in his pants legs, himself desperate for something to take his raging mentality out on, but the only people around him were his siblings and he couldn’t do that to them. Especially not now.

No, I definitely regret it.

Fred’s breath hitched into a sob as he wiped at his own eyes, surprising some if not all of his brothers and sister.

She had just asked me to help put some extra books away, at the time I thought nothing of it, not even to allow the question of why she didn't use magic instead to flitter around in my head.

“He’s….He’s just a child...Only eleven, why the hell….” Charlie tilted his head back to stare up at the ceiling, blinking away tears of his own that clung heavily to his eyelashes, all too eager to fall and soak his freckled face.

I started carrying books over to the shelves, placing them in neat rows. I didn't ask why she didn't help at the time either.

‘He’s so innocent,’ Bill thought to himself. ‘Who would want to...to…I can’t think that. I just can’t.’

It took me almost ten minutes to finish and as I raised on my toes to put the last book on the top shelf, that's when it happened.

Everyone held in a collective breath, too terrified and/or anxious to even think about breathing and possibly breaking the fragile silence.

The book banged against the floor as I yelped and jumped in surprise. As if by magic (ignore my dry humor), 

A quiet, watery chuckle from an unknown source.

she appeared behind my person, leaning down with her chest pressed against my back and hands on my hips. 

Creaking, like wood about to be snapped as Bill gripped the arm of the couch. His nails were dug into the fabric and his grip hard enough to bend the sturdy wood underneath.

I didn't know what to say,

‘Percy,’ Ron thought to himself, his own anger and anguish plan to see on his open book of a face.

I didn't know what to do. She was too close, hands holding me too tight. 

Fred’s eyes started to water and his twin’s voice wavered as he struggled to keep pushing forward. To keep reading their brother’s pain.

I felt nauseous when she began to whisper in my ear.

"What's wrong Mr. Weasley? Has no one ever held you like this? Touched you like this? 

Ginny’s shoulders were shaking, throat clogged with tears, and mascara smeared around her eyes as she held onto Charlie with all her might, desperate for the comfort Percy seemed denied of.

No, I suppose not." 

“Th-That horrible bitch,” Ginny managed to croak out. “I-I’m going to end her sorry e-e-excuse of a life.” Another sob ripped its way out of her throat and she wailed into her elder brother’s shoulder.

Each word made me shiver and sweat. I wanted her to let go, 

The only saving grace Bill felt was the relief that his parents were gone and his mother or father wouldn’t have to sit through and hear about what their baby boy had gone through, how he had been traumatized and hurt by someone that was supposed to teach and guide him.

How much Percy was broken before his life even truly began.

I truly did, but I was frozen in my spot. My hand was even still raised in the air after I dropped the textbook. 

"It's alright, touching like this isn't a big deal. It's human nature to want to be touched like this by another person, especially a beautiful woman like myself.

'M-Manipulative, sick, sadist bitch.’ George’s fingertips were hurting from how hard he was clenching the book. ‘He’s only 11, just a child. Why would she...why would anyone. It doesn’t make sense, it’s sick and depraved. He’s a child...a child...a child.’

“George,” Fred whispered quietly into his ear. “Come on, keep reading. The sooner we get this part over with, the better.”

George nodded, he hadn’t even realized he had stopped reading. This wouldn’t be over with though, these things never got ‘over with’. This part wouldn’t end for a long long time.

There's nothing wrong with this." 

‘There is!’ Fred wanted to scream at everything and nothing. This is wrong, so wrong and their brother was only eleven and he didn’t even know what was happening and...and this professor was shattering his trust and breaking his spirit with her words and actions.

Then why did it feel wrong? Why did it feel like my stomach was churning and I was about to lose my lunch?

Fred’s tears overflowed, pouring down his cheeks and soaking his face in the salty liquid of the pain he felt for his brother. How could they not know? How could Percy hide something so horrible from them? How could they have let him? It wasn’t right, it wasn’t fair. Percy was good, he didn’t deserve that. No one did…

It was Ron who stood and offered Fred his comfort, crouching beside his elder brother and laying his hand on his knee. It was small, and it helped, but not by much though.

She stepped away suddenly and spun me around, dainty yet rough fingers gripped my jaw and squeezed painfully tight. 

Bill had nearly broken the armrest under him as George powered through, voice choking and stopping every now and then as he struggled to even finish sentences. Tears were covering his brothers and sister’s faces, eyes wet and unyielding with their abundance.

Bill wanted to find this woman and demolish everything she’s ever cared for before ending her life in the most painful way possible.

He wasn’t the only one, he knew.

Professor Shrew 

A few growled at the name, while the others choked on their tears.

(I despise even writing her name) forced me to stare upwards until our eyes met and my neck hurt. "Now don't say a word to anyone about this little conversation. Imagine what your dear mummy would think if she heard of what a little tease her son was. 

A pin could be dropped. Silence. Horrifyingly quiet silence.

Ginny was held in place by Charlie before she could jump up, his own bangs hiding the no doubt shimmering eyes, wet with tears.

“She’s manipulating him, hurting him and we can’t do anything?!” Ginny’s anger was less something to be feared than for something to be pitied as tears continued raining down her face, dripping off her chin, and soaking the collar of her shirt as she wailed and screamed.

It only made George sob harder as he held Percy’s diary to his chest, trying to avoid soaking the delicate pages with his own tears.

It took all their willpower to calm down enough for George to keep reading, despite the greenish tint to his face. 

“I can...I can finish if you want Georgie,” Bill offered quietly as he held his hand out for the book only for George to adamantly shake his head. He held the book tighter to his chest, no one said a word.

“No...I-I got it. I can do this. It’s nothing compared to the pain Percy went through. It’s the least I can do.”

The younger twin took a shuddering breath and looked down at the diary in his hands, finding the spot he left off before continuing.

She'd be disgusted." 

Ginny buried her head in Bill’s side this time, chest heaving as she tried to muffle her own sobbing.

I didn't know what she meant by me being a tease, and I still don't, but I know I didn't like being called one.

“P-Percy,” Ron mumbled quietly, eyes downcast as he pulled his knees up to his chest from where he sat on the floor still, laying his head against Fred’s knees. His older brother said nothing.

Tears had welled up in my eyes like they are now. 

Ginny let out another wail.

Shrew let me go, lightly shoving me back into the shelves. I was allowed to leave after that at least. 

Charlie glanced at his only older brother, reaching over Ginny to lay a comforting hand on Bill’s shoulder.

Bill glanced at it before covering Charlie’s hand with his own and squeezing gently.

I couldn't be around anyone, I just ran and hid in an empty classroom until I heard the last bell end the day's classes.

“He should have told someone. Us. Mom and dad. A teacher...Someone…” Charlie spoke quietly, watching as Ron buried his face in his knees.

Why did she do that? Why did she hold me like that and say those things? I don't know what she wants, I don't know what I did. 

‘Nothing...you did nothing Percy. You need to believe that.’ Bill’s thoughts were running rampant, desperate to piece together and comprehend why a professor of all people would hurt one of their own students. In such a public place, no less. Anyone could have walked in.

I shouldn't have told Oliver to go on ahead. It's my fault, it's all my fault. 

“No!” Ginny’s shout brought all their minds to a halt. Their baby sister shaking and shivering, on the verge of making herself sick with the amount of crying she did. “It was never your fault, P-Percy. Never. No one would ever think that. You need to know it wasn’t your fault…” Her brothers didn’t mention that she was talking to no one, that Percy wasn’t there, that he was instead miles away in his own flat doing God knows what. Even if he had no idea what was happening at the burrow, they needed him to believe that none of this was his fault.

But, would he ever?

George continued reading.

I want to go home. I want my mum. 

George’s voice halted again before he swallowed the lump in his throat and read the last sentence for that entry.

I need to stop, I can't write anymore about this, or I might start to sob even harder.

Bill choked on rage and fear and pain.

His brother...his baby brother was hurt...And Bill hadn't been able to do anything to stop it.

Chapter Text

Percy isn’t okay. Percy isn’t fucking okay. Silence reverberated so loud throughout the room that it was nearly suffocating. They’ve only read three and a half months in and already such a life-altering, traumatic sequence of events is beginning to unfold.

It’s sickening.

Percy was eleven then, he’s twenty-three now. So much time has passed and so much more is left for them to read. So much hurt and pain must be trapped inside and there’s nothing they can do. Nothing now, at least.

Percy…

“I’ll just…” George lets out a small, nearly inaudible sob. “I’ll just keep going then, right? Something good is bound to happen to him….something has to…”

No one much felt like speaking for the moment, the silence continuing to grow like a black cloud hovering thick over their heads.

It might get better.

Or it might get worse.

George continued from where he had left off.

14 November, 1987

I didn’t even want to get up today, 

A few, muffled, cries could be heard if one listened closely. None of them commented on it.

I slept in well past breakfast and I think I worried Oliver. He was entering our dorm just as I was waking up and he had that look of instant relief on his face that made me wonder why.

“He wonders…” Ron swallowed the lump in his throat. “He wonders why his friend and roommate, someone who must know his daily habits so easily by now, is worried when he acts so out of the ordinary. Oliver cares for him and he just….he just doesn’t see the people that care.”

It’s a heartbreaking realization, made even worse by their new insight into their brother’s no doubt further tormented mind.

I wondered if he knew...knew what happened yesterday. I didn’t want him to know, I don’t want anyone to know. 

“Percy.” It seems all Ginny can do is sob her brother’s name into the air, as if she’s expecting him to reply and come running like he always did when she was little.

He was always there when she needed him in the past.

But she’s not there for him. He’s hurting and he’s alone.

Might it…might it be too late to mend their relationship?

All she did was touch me, so why do I feel so dirty and unclean? 

Ginny chokes on another sob and buries her face further into Bill’s side. She doesn’t want to hear anymore, she doesn’t want to know, but Percy has known….Percy has suffered more than any of them possibly realized.

She needs to listen…at least to know how they can make amends and help their brother.

Bill pulls her closer and holds his head up. He can break down and scream and cry all he wants later, his little sister and brothers need him now. His needs can wait.

My head’s starting to hurt.

Oliver had stared at me like I was a ghost, the mere thought was funny seeing as literal ghosts roamed the corridors and we saw a couple of them daily.

“H-He’s joking…a-after….” Fred’s lip is quivering and he bites down on it hard enough to taste the iron of blood. “D-Dark humor, am I right Georgie?”

George tries to mimic the smile Fred’s using to hide the horror and pain he feels for their brother. It looks more like a sick grimace. “Right you are Freddie.”

No one reprimands them this time.

“Oliver,” I had said with a question in my voice.

Oliver swallowed visibly and looked me in the eyes. “Yeah, Perce?”

“You okay?”

‘After that,’ Charlie thinks to himself, head in his hands and leg shaking. He just wants to hit something, to throw everything around. To break anything in sight. ‘He’s still worried about his friend. Percy…who are you?’

“I am, are you?” I nod. 

He’s not – all of the Weasley’s agree. He’s just too good at hiding his pain.

His face contorted into confusion, a frown marring his features as he sat on the edge of my bed. “You missed breakfast and it’s almost lunchtime. 

“Oh, Percy,” Ron mumbles and pulls his knees up to his chest.

That’s so unlike you to sleep in so late, even on the weekends. Usually, you’re up by dawn or something. Long night?”

Ginny lets out another, shuddering sob. 

The twins slump against each other, Fred laying his head on George’s shoulder and most likely reading what he could see to himself.

Bill and Charlie share yet another look and Ron just buries his face in his knees.

“Yeah, you could say that.” 

The injustice Percy must have felt.

I gave Oliver a small, reassuring smile but it felt fake and unreal. I didn’t feel like smiling much.

“He used to be so happy when he was younger…” Bill discreetly wipes the corner of his eye and kisses his little sister’s head in a comforting manner.

That only confused Oliver more, but he seemed to relax slightly at the very least, thankfully. 

How early did he learn to deflect unwanted attention? For various reasons… How much did Percy have to adapt to at such a young age just to get through day after day?

Too much apparently.

It was Saturday and I would usually go to the library in the mornings after breakfast, followed by spending time with Oliver

Ginny choked on another sob, but she let the barest, tiniest of smiles cross her face for the moment. Oliver was good, he could help Percy where they couldn’t. Maybe there’s hope after all.

Or maybe not, they have no way of knowing how to help until they finish his diary.

Her heart hurts and her stomach churns.

who I slowly realized was probably becoming my closest friend here at Hogwarts.

He’s good. He can help. Ginny nods to herself, taking deep breaths to try and de-escalate her sobbing before she makes herself sick.

I didn’t feel much like doing any of that today. I just wanted to lay back down and hide under my covers and pretend I didn’t still feel that woman’s phantom touch.

“Damnit, when I find her…” Charlie clenched his fists. “If she’s still alive she’s going to wish she died in the war.” This was shocking, Charlie is probably their most pacifistic sibling, and seeing him so angry? Truly Terrifying.

The twins share a look. Marked in deep, gouging writing is the name Gila Shrew on their list. She is going to pay, one way or another.

“I’m just not feeling all too well,” I tried instead. “I think I might be coming down with something, is all.”

Adapt to deflect…adapt to survive. Adapting. Always adapting to protect himself.

Oliver nodded slowly, but I could see how his brow furrowed in thought like he was trying to comprehend something. I don’t know what he thought he saw, though.

“You, you dummy,” Ginny speaks quietly. “He sees you and how you’re different from the day before.”

“Want me to bring you lunch then?”

“Yeah, that would be great.” I didn’t much feel like eating either, my stomach was in knots and I felt like I would be sick the second I stood up, but I didn’t want to worry him any more than I already was.

None of this bode well for future Percy’s psyche. It’s the first time in his life someone had taken advantage of him and used their power over him…it….oh, Percy.

Bill fights the urge to growl, to tear the book to pieces and be rid of the horrific past his baby brother no doubt endured. He stopped himself. If only barely.

I don’t like being a nuisance to people.

This starts a new round of loud, gasping sobs and Ginny heaves over, wrapping her arms around herself as she rocks. Bill and Charlie try their best to console her, to little effect; Ron even rises from his seat to sit by her legs as an extra form of comfort.

George feels the acrylic taste of acid on the back of his tongue as he forces himself to keep going yet again.

15 November, 1987

I’m definitely starting to worry Oliver now, it’s Sunday and I’ve barely left my bed since Friday afternoon. 

This is only the beginning, they know. He’s so young and everything can end up being a slippery slope. If he keeps getting worse and worse…who knows how their brother fared into his teens and then adulthood? How big of a mask did he plaster in place to hide his true feelings…his true thoughts away?

I feel bad, 

Bill closes his eyes, images of his little brother flashing through his mind. He used to smile a lot more in their youth, but every time he draws to conjure up a more recent image of Percy, even before the second war, he draws a blank.

He’s an awful brother to not have noticed.

but it seems like the simplest of actions is draining on my body and psyche. I hate this feeling and I want it to go away but it wasn’t.

It won’t…most likely not for a long, long time.

Oliver was threatening to go get my brothers, 

“He should have,” Charlie hissed, venom in his voice. “He should have told us something was wrong with Percy…”

“He’d just make Percy feel betrayed…” George rubbed the back of his neck and glanced back down at the book, a grimace visible on his face.

but I just about begged him not to…

He didn’t even want to confide in them….How badly had they messed up?

I told him that I was just feeling faint and a little bit sickly and he suggested I go see Madame Pomfrey, the head matron of the hospital wing. I talked him out of that, though, and said it wasn’t bad enough to bother her with.

“You’re not a bother to anyone, Percy.” Ginny uses Charlie’s handkerchief to wipe her eyes and blow her nose. “I wish we could have been better about showing you that.”

It really wasn’t. I felt physically fine. 

Physically.

Physically he can heal. His mental state is another story entirely, how many nights did he stay up wondering why over and over again until he passed out?

Note how I said physically. I feel like such a burden with him worrying over me. 

Ron gulps a breath of air, desperate to catch some semblance of control over his breathing.

I don’t like it when people do that, they’re just wasting their time on me when they could be doing so many more important things.

“He’s…” Fred trails off, voice going quiet and looking to George for help.

“Important too.” George finishes. “Why can’t he see that?”

“Because we never showed him…” Bill hangs his head, disappointment and rage rolling off his shoulders in waves. Charlie wasn’t much better.

My mother and father used to do it all the time despite already having their hands full. Bill and Charlie do too, sometimes, 

Their parents cared for and provided for them to the best of their abilities and resources. Sure, they never got brand-new clothes or books and wore hand-me-downs that have seen at least three generations before, but there was always a roof over their heads and food on the table.

They may not have all gotten much attention while Molly and Arthur had to juggle their other duties with seven children, but they still tried their best. Bill and Charlie had to pick up some of the slack when it came to their brothers and sister, and it seems Percy must have tried in his own way after they had left.

but I know they’d much rather do something more physical and sporty than spend that time with their bookworm little brother.

Charlie runs a hand through his hair, looking toward Bill with a guilty look plastered all over his face. They know they didn’t have much in common with Percy, but they would have gladly spent more time with him if they had known this is how he felt.

I’ll say it again, I don’t like being a burden and I don’t like people worrying over nothing. My problems, I can deal with them. 

Ginny’s lower lip wobbles as she fights back the fresh waves of tears, she hadn’t cried this much since she was an infant. The pain and hurt her brother felt, though…it’s just too much.

I don’t want anyone, family or friends, to know. They don’t need to know. They don’t need to. They don’t need to. They don’t need to.

None of them had dry eyes at this point — Ginny and Fred were outright sobbing, Charlie and Ron were fighting back tears, and Bill and George’s eyes were watering.

16 November, 1987

I didn’t want to leave my bed this morning either, 

Of course he didn’t want to, who would?

but I had school to attend and that couldn’t wait. Nothing was more important than my studies if I wanted to do something with my life.

Bill let out a dry chuckle, not from amusement but from the fact that Percy had always been such a studious person, even when he was barely into his schooling. So determined and ambitious, ready to do whatever it took to achieve his goals.

Whatever it took, even when it cost him his family (not that they were much of a family towards him to begin with).

Oliver was pleased to see me getting up and ready for the day, at least. I felt bad for making him worry like a mother hen.

Fred and George share another look.

Breakfast was soon and I was starving; Oliver had brought me meals while I was just about comatose this weekend, thankfully, but I hadn’t eaten much at all. Just the thought of food made me want to run to the bathroom, I didn’t think my stomach could handle it with the nausea.

“He’s gonna start making himself sick if he doesn’t eat right,” Ron mutters.

It seems my appetite was back.

Another thing Oliver (or anybody) wouldn’t have to worry about.

Ginny huffs and wipes at her eyes again. “We’re always gonna worry.”

I don’t have DADA today 

A breath of relief fell through the small group.

and that’s the only thing I’m concerned about. I don’t want to see her again, but I know I don’t really get a choice in that matter.

A horribly sad reality for their brother.

Today just feels bad, like yesterday and the day before…..

Charlie lets a single tear drip down his cheek before attempting to scrub it away with the palm of his hand.

I should talk to someone….

‘He won’t,’ Fred thinks. ‘Percy was always too proud and stubborn to top it all off…’

But I don’t want anyone to know.

They know now and all they can do is listen to the injustices Percy endured. How much more will they read? They have no idea, but they’ll just have to be there for him after this. As much as he’ll let them. How are they going to explain to Percy what they’re doing? How do they tell him they know?

Bill has no idea and for the first time ever, he’s at a loss when it comes to one of his siblings.

It scares him.

17 November, 1987

I hate this. I hate this feeling and this day. I hate, hate, hate it.

Oh. That’s not good, not at all, but they should have expected this soon.

I hate her.

She’s going to pay if it’s the last thing they do.

I’ve never felt such a venomously sickening feeling of hate before and it makes my veins feel as if fire is coursing through them and boiling my blood. It’s hard to focus in her class, hard to concentrate on my work.

“We’ve seen Percy mad…but to the extent of this description? Not even close. What kind of rage does he have bottled up after years and years?” George looked at each of them in turn. “And what kind of siblings are we for not noticing?”

“It’s not just our fault,” Ron tried to argue, voice weak with no heat. “He never said anything either.”

“But we never took the time to get to know him like we should have.” Bill finished that conversation with one solid look that had the other two shrinking in their seats.

It’s worse than my hate for Marcus Flint.

George’s grip on the book tightened.

I don’t even want to write her name.

That bad…she had hurt him that bad. Not physically, but emotionally and that’s all it takes sometimes.

All through DADA she keeps locking her eyes on me as she speaks to the class as a whole.

Ginny’s face heats up, blood boiling and throat constricting as the urge to scream grows. Hasn’t she done enough?! She’s already betrayed his trust and absolutely terrified him. What more does she want?! Ginny knows sick people exist, but trying to imagine what else that woman wants from Percy has bile rising in her throat.

As she walks around, checking our work and assisting others, she takes every opportunity to touch my shoulder or arm, 

“That bitch,” Bill swears, couch arm officially cracked under his slightly above human strength. “How dare she…how fucking dare she!”

to lean over me with the guise of looking over my paper.

Charlie’s eyes narrow at the book, face eerily blank and cold; and it feels like a bomb is going to go off when they least expect it.

We’ve been working on the safest and easiest ways to dispatch imps and the subject isn’t all too bad, if a bit boring and mundane.

I wish she’d leave me alone. 

So do they.

Why doesn’t anyone else notice her behavior?

“He’s crying out for help and no one notices. Why didn’t we notice…” Charlie hangs his head, voice quiet and scarily empty. Seeing their joyful, vibrantly enthusiastic big brother so emotionless frightened them. He wasn’t supposed to act like that, he was supposed to….they weren’t quite sure.

I feel sick again, I’d skip dinner if Oliver would let me.

Scabbers is staring at me, I’ll feed him before I go.

18 November, 1987

This feeling still won’t go away, 

It most likely won’t.

though I got out of bed easier today than yesterday and Oliver seems happier than before, he’s going on and on about the Hufflepuff vs Ravenclaw match in ten days. After the Slytherin and Gryffindor one, I’m less inclined to join him this time around.

“Was it that bad? He seemed to sort of enjoy Quidditch in his later years?” Ron heaves a sigh and tilts his head back to hit against the couch. “He really hates those crowds and noise…”

“You have no idea, Ron.” Bill reaches down to pat his head only for Ron to glare and swat his hand away with a huff.

He gets so ecstatic though, I think I’ll just suck it up this time around.

“He’s a lot more selfless than I remember, not as stuck up and prudish.” Fred nudges his twin again and, when he doesn’t get a reaction, he flops down and tosses his legs across George’s lap.

It’s just a game…even if it feels like the noise is going to cause my skull to vibrate out of my head.

Just a stupid, little game that makes others happy. I suppose I shouldn’t judge, books make me happy and Quidditch makes Oliver and my family happy. The game itself isn’t all bad, just…loud.

Ron lets out a quiet chuckle, voice dim. “I knew he liked the game…”

“He never said that-”

“Shuddup Ginny.”

Sometimes, I wish I could just sit and enjoy the game, maybe then I’ll actually have something in common with my family. 

The minimal joking air left the room as fast as it came.

I’m a little jealous I can’t.

Oh well, no need to get so upset over such a thing, I suppose.

‘He has every right to be. Feeling like he doesn’t belong in his own family…I can’t imagine.’ Bill stares at the ceiling, wondering (not for the first time) how often they had hurt, belittled, ignored, and left their brother out of things.

Too often

19 November, 1987

Have I said how much I hate flying?

A few, tiny laughs escaped some of them. This is seeming to be a slightly more light-hearted entry, hopefully.

I’d rather just lay in bed forever to avoid that class, 

They all had that one class that they utterly despised and it shouldn’t be a surprise that even Percy had one, despite being the bookworm nerd that he is.

at least then people might leave me alone about it. 

Maybe not as light-hearted as they had hoped.

Except maybe Oliver, but maybe I could make an exception for him.

Fred smiled to himself. Oliver was always Percy’s exception in school (and vice versa). They needed each other then and he bets they need each other now.

24 November, 1987

I’m such an emotional idiot. 

“Perce…”

A few snide comments and I end up sobbing in Myrtle’s bathroom again, venting and ranting to her through tears.

“Shit,” Charlie rubs his eyes and mumbles another curse. “I had no idea he was struggling so much when he started Hogwarts. Or that people were bothering him like that.”

“It’s neither of your faults,” George looks up at the two eldest Weasley siblings before looking back down at the journal in his hands. “Percy wouldn’t let you see. He wouldn’t let any of us see.”

She listens, makes a comment or two, and comforts me.

Percy has people (both dead and alive) that care about him more than he knows and it’s heartbreaking that he never could see that.

Looking back on it now, hours later, I think she was just showing the comfort and support she wished someone would have shown her when she was still with the living.

A small amount of guilt crept up their spines at the way they mocked and ridiculed poor moaning Myrtle as all she wanted was most likely a friend to speak with. Decades of horrible schoolchildren probably soured any sweetness the ghost girl once harbored in her heart.

It’s a sad, pitiful story, but everyone deserves to feel loved and safe.

‘Do you see, Percy? Do you believe your own words? Can you find it in yourself to ask for help? You probably can’t…can you?’ Bill’s thoughts are on a rollercoaster, everything yet nothing making sense all in the same.

In due time.

I should stop by to see her when I’m not in the middle of a breakdown, I think she’d really appreciate it. Hopefully.

“He sounds so…so kind, despite everything he’s dealing with.” Ron tilts his head back to knock against Ginny’s knees and looks up towards her, Bill, and Charlie.

“Yeah…” Bill muses. “He’s always had a gentle soul.”

It’s just really nice to talk to someone like this. My family is out of the question 

They hurt and pushed him at such a young age that he doesn’t even feel comfortable enough to let go and speak with them freely. About anything.

and Oliver is too good to bother with such diminutive issues.

“Not dim-dimun- Whatever that bloody word is!” Ron tosses his hands up, nearly slapping Ginny, who pinches his ear in retaliation. The youngest brother calms down momentarily, arms crossed and glaring at the book as if Percy was right in front of them so they could knock some sense into him.

I almost want to tell Myrtle about that woman.

He should…

I don’t, though, because I still don’t want a soul (living or dead) to know. It’s something I’ll take to the beyond with me.

He’s eleven and already so hurt by family and strangers alike and none of them saw it. Their family fucked up more than they realized in the beginning. It’s a relationship that won’t be so easily mended, even after the end of the war.

26 November, 1987

Oliver is funny when he sulks.

Fred and George smile fondly at the new mention of their old captain.

He’s glaring at the History of Magic 

Charlie and Ron share a look of equal distaste and if Hermione was there she would most likely be reprimanding them for disrespecting ‘such a lovely knowledgeable subject’.

essay he just received back. He did absolutely terrible that it was almost laughable. Almost.

“He probably would have been kicked off the team if Percy hadn’t helped him out as much as he did,” Fred commented.

“It wasn’t just History of Magic he was struggling in either.” George snickers.

“Want to study with me in the library, Oli?” 

Ginny coos at the nickname.

I offer him with a nudge as we leave class together.

“Sure, yeah. Whatever….” He hangs his head and crumbles the paper in his fist until it's a ball, tossing it down the hall.

He runs to pick it up though when he catches Professor McGonagall staring at him from the end of the corridor.

More laughter, slightly more animated than before, fills the room. McGonagall can be downright terrifying when she wants to be; she doesn’t even need to utter a word.

They’ve all been under that terrifying stare.

The library was near silent, just like always and Oliver had disappeared to the Great Hall to grab us a bite to eat throughout our lunch period. 

“At least he’s eating,” Ginny mutters.

Madam Pince watched us like a hawk the first time we brought food into the library, but I like to think we slowly earned her trust over the past few weeks.

George shoves Fred’s legs off of him and laughs at the noise of indignation. “Of course perf-” He cuts himself off. “Of course, Percy would get away with food in the library.”

I drop my things at a table in the back and start pulling everything I would need out.

“Um…” I hear a quiet, timid voice ask. I jerk my head up and see a Ravenclaw girl (most likely) in my year with long, curly blonde hair. 

The twins start nudging each other with matching, mischievous grins that didn’t bode well for anyone.

“Oi, Freddy?”

“Yeah, Georgie?”

“Doesn’t that sound like-”

“I reckon you’re right, brother dearest.” They snicker to themselves.

“Who?” Ron tilts his head and huffs. “Your creepy, cryptid twin stuff is annoying, just tell us who you think it is already.”

“Oh,” Fred stifles a laugh. “We’re sure you’ll find out soon.”

A second girl (a Hufflepuff about the same age with her brown hair tied in twin braids) hovered behind her almost like she was trying to hide from sight.

“Hello?” I didn’t feel like talking much.

“Why would he,” Charlie mutters and keeps his eyes trained on his shoes, avoiding the gazes anyone might have sent his way.

I’ve been avoiding people as much as possible these past few days and just socializing for a few moments has been exhausting as of late for me. 

Bill rubs Ginny’s back as she sniffles, his own eyes feeling a little misty once more. Just the beginning and there’s still so much left to uncover.

“Can I help you two?

The blonde nods quickly and holds up a Charms book. “I’m Penelope Clearwater 

“Heh…bloody knew it.”

and this is my friend Audrey MacGuire.” She moves slightly out of the way and Audrey gives me a small wave.

“Nice to meet you two.” I smile politely, but it feels pinched and unreal. “My name is Percival. Percival Weasley. You may call me Percy, though”

Ron smiles slightly. “I had no idea they knew each other so long, it makes me wonder how they ended up together for a time. Especially if what you say Oliver’s feelings regarding Percy happen to ring true.”

George gives his youngest brother a toothy grin. “Maybe we’ll get to see, heh. Hopefully, Percy isn’t one to write all the naughty bits. I don’t want to hear that.”

“George!”

“What?!”

Bill pinches the bridge of his nose and heaves a sigh. “Let’s not bring up our brother’s sex life.”

Fred snorts a laugh and covers his mouth. “Does he even have a sex life?”

“I’m warning you two.” Bill’s eyes narrow and the twins both nod, swallowing and averting their eyes from their brother’s glower.

The two exchange a look before looking at me once more. “Could you…would you…Ugh.” 

Ginny smiles slightly. Penelope seems a lot more human and less godlike than Percy always made her out to be. Not perfect, nobody’s perfect…not even Percy, as much as a rollercoaster shock it is to see that.

Penelope clears her throat and sets the book in front of me. “We need help with Charms. You’re always doing so well and studying in here, do you mind helping us out?”

“I knew he tutored students, but as early as first year…just wow,” Charlie smiles to himself, pulling at a loose thread on the cuff of his sweater. “So intelligent and ambitious, he was.”

I remember I just blinked and stared at them for a moment. It was the only time I can remember someone actually asking for my help because they needed me. 

Another bout of silence for the moment before Fred breaks it with a quiet laugh full of little to no joy. “Oh, Percy…how neglectful have we been…”

Not my older brothers or even the twins, but me. 

That stung, minimally; but it stung them more on Percy’s behalf.

It’s especially flattering knowing a Ravenclaw is asking for my help with Charms of all things. 

“That is kind of funny, isn’t it? And it shows just how intelligent he is, heh, good job Perce.” Ron leans into Ginny’s legs, a small smile flitting across his face.

They grew antsy and kept looking at each other.

“Oh, uh, sure. I can give you two a hand. Though my friend is going to be joining us so I can help him with History of Magic.”

Fred and George chuckle and repeated their previous statement - “I think Percy’s the only reason he passed that class and didn’t get kicked off the quidditch team for failing."

“That’s fine!” Audrey pipes up from behind Penelope, a look of relief crossing her face.

“Yeah! We can all help each other out!” Penelope grins and makes herself comfortable at the table across from me with Audrey dropping into the seat next to her. “A study group!” Penelope is much louder and more outgoing, it seems, in comparison to Audrey.

“I didn’t know Percy actually had friends other than Oliver,” Fred’s eyes fall on the cover of the journal. “How little we must know.”

“I know Fred, we all know very little.”

“Perce!”

“That’s gotta be Oliver.”

“Shh!!”

I smile as I see Madam Pince reprimanding Oliver 

The twins (and Ron) snicker behind their hands.

as he carefully balanced two separate plates with his other stuff. She looks like she’s giving him a very thorough reminder of what would happen if we made a mess with the food.

“Nothing good, that’s for sure.”

Oliver gives her a sheepish look, nods, apologizes, and then makes his way over to us. He looks surprised to see Penelope and Audrey sitting with me, but shrugs and sets the plates down.

“A go-with-the-flow kind of guy, huh?” Bill looks towards his younger siblings as he knows very little of Oliver, actually.

“Yep, when it doesn’t come quidditch he is.”

“Sorry ladies, didn’t know we would be having company or I would have grabbed more.”

“It’s okay! Percy’s just going to help us study Charms.” Penelope smiles all giddy-like.

“She seems so sweet, no wonder Percy liked her. Or likes? How did their relationship end.” Ginny muses quietly to herself, not expecting an answer but receiving several shrugs in response to her question.

“Oh? We got a study group going now, huh?” Oliver wraps an arm around my shoulder. “I think we got a head boy right here in the future, you know? Smart as a whip, he is.”

“Such a good hype and wingman.”

“Oh, shut up, Oliver.”

We all laugh quietly and lower our voices as Madam Pince makes a loud ‘harumph’ sound towards us.

It was fun, we spent our entire lunch in the library, studying and chatting and helping each other out. 

“He has friends, at least.” Charlie tests a look towards the book, averting his eyes immediately. “Hopefully, the future years will be easier for him.” He can’t place why, but a sickening feeling is filling the pit of his stomach as if a hard stone settled there.

Audrey opened up more and me and Oliver let them steal food from our plates.

Ginny wipes away her remaining tears, a watery laugh slipping past her lips.

I was mildly annoyed when it was time for us to go our separate ways for our next classes.

We made sure to set up another study session for tomorrow evening, after classes and before dinner.

“He’s going to be okay Gin, he’s got people looking out for him.” Bill pulls his sister closer, pressing a kiss into her hair like he had done when she was much smaller.

“I…I know, but it still hurts knowing we failed him since the beginning.”

“I know. Trust me I know.”

It wasn’t much, but this made me smile and it didn’t feel nearly as forced or pinched as before.

Charlie isn’t the only one smiling, his brothers and sister all have similar, tiny smiles in place of their previous anguish.

27 November, 1987

She was doing that stuff again, 

The small, light-hearted mood instantly dissipated once again.

that terrible woman. I refuse to even call her by her name to her face anymore. If I have to speak to her, it’s ‘Professor’ and that’s it.

Ginny clenches her fist, only relaxing when Bill squeezes her shoulder in understanding. “I know,” he mumbles into her ear. “It’s okay to feel what you’re feeling, I understand.”

I’m one of the first people out of my seat with Oliver racing to catch up to me. He’s confused, I can tell, as he catches me by the sleeve of my robe and asks me to slow down. 

“I hope Percy talks to him…he needs to talk to someone instead of writing in his book.”

The thread Charlie’s pulling at is starting to fray. “It’s not that easy for him, Fred. Percy’s never been the best at opening up, you know that.”

“Yeah, yeah…but still…”

I apologize and we walked at a much more appropriate pace together on our way to Herbology.

We see Audrey there since we share Herbology with Hufflepuff and she casually sets up her stuff near ours. She’s a timid thing and tends to hide behind people to avoid attention. 

Ginny huffs quietly. “Sounds like someone else I know.”

I’ve known her for twenty-four hours and I already feel like I know her personality quite well.

Ron licks his chapped lips and swallows the lump in his throat. “He says he doesn’t understand people, but I think he does better than he realizes.”

Penelope meets us in the Great Hall, bouncing on her heels and waving her arms widely, nearly hitting one of her fellow Ravenclaws.

“Her…and Percy? They were actually a thing?” Ron voices his thoughts, shock lacing his tone.

“Yeeeup,” George draws out. “Surprising, huh?”

“Very.”

“Audrey! Percy! Oliver! Over here, let’s go!”

They make me feel a little better after DADA, only a little though and I give a small grin. 

“It’s something, at least.”

It’s better than being alone, I think. 

Ron rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. ‘Anything’s better than being alone,’ he thinks.

I can’t hide away under my covers after every bad thing that happens, that’s no way to live.

“So young, yet so wise in the dawn of trauma.” Charlie ignores the stares he receives, unraveling more and more of the thread.

I guess I just have to take it one day at a time. Not everything is sunshine and rainbows.

“Small steps,” Charlie continues. “That’s all he can do for the moment, even if it feels like he’s going backward.”

28 November, 1987

The blessed weekend allows me to sleep in for once, though Oliver doesn’t let me much. He’s jumping on the edge of my bed in an attempt to get me up, 

“Quidditch weekend,” the twins voice simultaneously, nearly causing their brothers and sister to jump out of their skin in surprise.

“Stop that!”

“Never, Ronniekins!”

I only throw my pillow at his head and glare.

“As one does.”

“C’mon! It’s Hufflepuff vs Ravenclaw! Bet your dessert Ravenclaw wins!” I laugh and shove him away so I can climb out of bed.

“You’re on, and that dessert is going to taste so much sweeter when I eat it in front of you.” I stick my tongue out and start digging through my trunk.

Bill smiles into his hand. “I forgot how petty he could be, it was adorable.”

“So cruel, Perce! What happened to my sweet, considerate best friend?”

“Hah-”

“George.”

“Sorry, sorry.” The younger twin snickers.

Best friend. That sounds nice. I have a best friend.

Oliver tosses me my coat to keep the encroaching winter chill away. “Scarf?”

“Mhm.” I nod and he grabs it from where I left it hanging from my bed’s canopy. 

Ginny starts her cooing again and drums her fingers against her thigh. “They’re absolutely adorable!”

“Yes, Ginny,” Ron groans. “We’ve heard you say that a hundred times over by now.”

“Well, sorry that I want my brother to be with someone that makes him happy!”

“For fucks sake…”

“Thanks, Oli.”

“No problem, Perce.” He wraps his arm around my shoulders and starts nudging me towards the Great Hall for breakfast. 

A sharp look from Ron keeps her from squealing again.

“Hey?”

“Yeah?”

Oliver presses something into my hand and when I look down at it I raise a brow. “Are these earplugs?”

Ron, Fred, and George all tilt their heads in mild confusion; though Fred’s eyes soon light up with a quiet understanding. “Ah…”

“Yeah!” Oliver lets his infectious grin fall into place. “I noticed you didn’t seem to care for all the noise much last time, so I thought these might help? You know? Sorry, if it’s stupid…”

“He knows Percy so well!” Ginny shifted from side to side and Ron thought she might jump up at any moment from excitement. “Even when he was so engulfed by that game, he still took note of Percy’s feelings and emotional state! He pays so much attention to him, it’s awesome.

“Don’t worry about it, thanks Oli.” He went out of the way to pay attention to me and find me something in an attempt to help me with a problem.

Ginny claps her hands and it’s only Bill’s arm around her that keeps her seated.

It’s sad how touched I feel at such a simple action. 

‘Yeah…it really is. I’m sorry, Perce.’ George smiles ruefully and turns the page, rubbing his fingers across the long-dried ink.

“They’ll be perfect.”

“Great.”

Later that night (just an hour ago actually), I did take great pleasure in eating Oliver’s dessert in front of him and Penelope.

“Petty.”

They glared at me as I shared with Audrey. Hufflepuff won, 160 to 60, surprisingly.

“Booo!” The twins call, cupping their hands around their mouths as Ron soon echoes them.

It was a minor, sweet victory that I’ll be sure to tease those two about. Maybe I’ll get Audrey to join in.

29 November 1987

Bill got lucky his birthday fell on a Sunday. 

Bill ignores his family’s looks and instead tries to wrack his brain for the memory of his seventeenth birthday.

No classes, though still plenty of school work, I’m sure.

Sadly that’s the truth of attending the grandest school of wizardry in the modern world.

I haven’t seen my older brothers much during the small amount of time I’ve been at Hogwarts. 

Okay, they deserve those glares. That’s beyond fair.

They’re always busy with school, quidditch, their friends, etc.

I don’t want to bother them.

Charlie shrinks in his seat, abandoning the loose thread and hanging his head with his chin pressed against his chest. “We really made him feel like that, would things have turned out differently if we just took a little more notice of him?”

“I don’t know,” Bill sighs. “Percy’s always been a bit different and distant, I doubt it would have changed much…though maybe…Whatever, it doesn’t matter anymore.”

Bill seems to like the things I’ve drawn him for his birthdays in the past, 

Bill nods – he has a small box tucked away in his closet full of every picture he received from Percy, even the oldest scraps of paper covered in the scribblings of a toddler.

so I figured that was a safe gift for him. It ended up taking me much longer (days) than I anticipated to finish it, but I managed with little time to spare.

“I didn’t know he spent so much time on his art…” Bill thumbs at the corner of his eye. It’s hard to explain how he’s feeling – sadness, joy, anger at himself – so many different feelings begin circling around his train of thought.

It was a small setting in Egypt, something simplistic yet hopefully captivating. I avoided color as I still can’t capture it the way I wish too, but the shading came out much better than I anticipated.

“Now I remember,” Bill smiles to himself and thinks back to the last time he saw that picture – it had to be when he and Fleur were moving into their home together. The picture was worn with age, yet still captured Egypt’s beauty.

It was a little hard thinking of what to draw for Bill, but he’s been talking about Egypt a lot lately. 

“I never knew he was listening, it was just random ramblings as I was getting closer to graduating.”

Charlie’s a lot easier, all I gotta do is draw him any kind of dragon (or any creature, though dragons are his favorite) and he’s delighted.

Charlie snorts and shares a look with Bill, amusement shining in his dull eyes. “He’s not wrong,” Bill comments. “You’re easy.”

“Oh sod off-” They both titter and ignore the looks they’re receiving.

It takes me nearly two hours to locate my brother and by the time I found him by the lake, I was mildly annoyed, but I pushed that feeling down. He’s with a few friends and that girlfriend of his.

The twins waggle their eyebrows and Bill tosses another couch pillow at them, bouncing it off the side of George’s head and hitting Fred in the face.

“Watch it before I need to get up, last warning.”

“You sound like mum!"

I hesitate before approaching them. 

Bill frowns.

Bill, I’m used to, but I didn’t know a single person he was with. 

Oh, that makes sense.

I waited around awhile, waiting to see if the small group would thin out some so it was less intimidating to approach.

“He seems so shy…he must have changed more than we even realized.” Ron crosses his legs, leaning forward expectantly.

“You four were quite young, it’s hard to remember how Percy’s mannerisms changed when you witnessed it so slowly.”

A few people did eventually leave and I was contemplating whether or not I should go up to him or wait to give him the drawing until later.

I don’t really like people nor to be a bother, besides he probably wants to spend more time with his friends and girlfriend rather than his nerdy little brother.

Ginny jabs both Bill and Charlie in the sides, drawing quiet curses from them. “Jerks.”

“We-urgh-know Gin. Fuck, that hurt.”

“Good!”

I was about to turn around with the plan to catch him later when less people were around, only my name being called caught my attention. I gripped the drawing tighter, careful not to crumble or rip it as I looked up and caught Bill looking in my direction.

My brother has such a big grin on his face as he waves me over towards his little group. It’s…nice, I think? Knowing that he spotted me and wants me to join them. I don’t know. Feelings are still complicated.

“Percy…he’s trying to understand things so much at such a young age; it’s nearly heart-breaking.”

“There’s only so much we can do now, we can help him.” Bill wraps his arm tighter around their sister. “I don’t believe he’s too far gone, not until I see it with my own eyes.”

“C’mon, Percy!” Bill’s still grinning and his friends are looking at me.

“Did you have to call him out like that?” Charlie grins weakly, reaching over to box Bill’s ear and knowing full well he’s the only one besides their parents (and Fleur) that can get away with it.

“I doubt I was thinking much about it at the time.”

“I’m sure.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat and slowly approached them under the shade of the tree they sat beneath.

“H-Hey, Bill,” I mumbled and stared down at my shoes, nudging the ground and smearing dirt on the worn toe. 

“He’s so timid, so unlike the Percy we know now…”

Bill reached toward me and grabbed my arm, yanking me down to sit next to him. 

Ginny shakes her head in exasperation. “Did you have to manhandle him?”

Bill smirks and ruffles her hair, causing her to squawk and flap her arms about in a very ungraceful, bird-like manner.

I swallow back the nauseous feeling and look up at my brother. 

Bill’s face drops, horror slowly encroaching across his features as his arms drop loosely into his lap. “P-Perce…oh, Merlin Percy…even me…I’m going to kill her.”

It’s Ginny’s turn to comfort her brother as she turns her full body to wrap her arms around his waist, burying her face in his shoulder as Charlie hastily gestures for George to keep reading.

Bill is smiling down at me and gestures toward his friends.

“Guys, this is my baby brother Percy. He’s in his first year.” I reluctantly look around at the small gathering and nod. There’s three girls and two guys. All staring at me. 

Guilt is slowly continuing to eat away at his consciousness. He should have been more observant, should have been there more…if only…if only nothing. He’s made mistakes regarding their brother as they all have; those things can’t be changed and maybe not even fixed. They can try to mend these bridges, but they’ll never be crack-free and Bill knows it.

“Percy, this is Rosa-” he gestured to one of the quidditch team beaters (his girlfriend, obviously by the way she was plastered to Bill’s other side). 

Fred and George would have possibly made a teasing joke on their oldest sibling’s behalf, but seeing the defeated look upon Bill’s face made them deflate and mumble something amongst themselves.

Now just wasn’t the time for jokes.

“Betty,” that’s the other beater. “Emily,” too much pink. “Del,” he looks like he’s about to blow away in the wind. “And Ezra,” the complete burly opposite of Del.

It’s been so long since he’s contacted any of his school friends, possibly not since his wedding at least; they’ve contacted him, he’s just never gotten back to them. Though, he remembers the day vividly when he saw Emily and Del amongst the rows of corpses lining Hogwarts halls the day Voldemort fell.

It was a day of loss and sorrow for all, enough so that it outweighed the victory.

“Hello…” I give a small wave and the majority return it.

“Oh?” Betty leaned over towards me, trying to look at the drawing I was still clutching. “Whatcha got there, Percy? Can we see?”

Bill smiles sadly, faint memories being brought to the front of his mind trying to push all the terrible guilt and shame back.

“O-Oh, um…” My face turned red in embarrassment. I’m such a child, drawing stupid little pictures and expecting them to be good gifts. 

“He is, though…,” Ron mumbles. “A child, I mean. He’s only eleven and expecting so much of himself.”

Well…they always make Bill and Charlie smile a little… 

They did and they always will.

“A-A drawing.”

“Can we see?” I dislike how they’re making me feel younger than I already am. It’s not inherently bad, I just dislike it.

“Perce, man…”

“...sure.” I hold the paper up and I see a few of them smiling and Bill wraps his arm around my shoulders.

Fuck, he was so stupid for not noticing.

I hated that I tensed. 

Bill drops his head into his hands, tears continuing to prick at his eyes and threatening to fall with every shaking breath.

I hope Bill didn’t notice.

“I should have.”

“Is that the Luxor temple in Egypt?” Bill’s eyes light up like Charlie’s when he talks about dragons or like dad and muggles.

“Mhm, I saw it in one of the library books.” Rosa and Emily smile, but Del and Ezra are snickering to themselves. 

His friends could be jerks at times, but it still hurt thinking of the fact their small friend group would never be whole again. Not as much as it hurt thinking of what his baby brother was put through. He’s grieved for them long enough, but this was new, fresh pain that continued to wash over him with every bitterly sad sentence.

“It’s…for you, Bill. For your birthday. I mean, happy birthday.” I huff as he pats my head and takes the picture.

Charlie looks towards Bill again and smiles, reaching over to pat his shoulder.

“I love it. Thanks, Perce.”

“He’s just adorable, Bill.” 

Ginny smiles against Bill’s side, peeking down to catch sight of Ron’s own, tinier smile.

Betty grins at me as she leans across Rosa to get a better look at the drawing. “Not only that, but also talented and if he’s as smart as you say, heh…” She drawls off and doesn’t finish her sentence. It feels weird, in a good way that is. Listening to her say something nice like that.

How deprived he must have been…to feel nice by the most basic of compliments from a near stranger.

“Yeah, he is.” Bill yanks me into his side and uses his other hand to carefully tuck the picture into his school bag. “He’s a good kid.”

“He definitely was…still is, just like you all are.” Bill wraps his arm around Ginny again, petting her head soothingly despite the ache that continues to linger in his chest cavity.

“Shuddup, Bill.” I glare at him, but Bill only smiles down at me. He’s too tall for his own good.

Charlie snickers and smirks at Bill.

But…it wasn’t as terrible as I thought it would be to meet a few of his friends. They’re nice, at least, and things could always be worse.

George sets the book down in his lap, voice quivering and throat nearly closing up on him. “Oh, fuck Perce. Don’t go jinxing yourself now.”

No one really moves for the longest of moments, just settling and absorbing this newest bout of insight into Percy’s early years.

“We really fucked up as a family, huh?” Ron asks no one, yet everyone and stares at the ceiling as Charlie pats his shoulder.

“Yeah, I think we did.”

“Whatever…bloody hell, my turn. Give me the damn book, already.”

Chapter Text

Ron already felt sick to his stomach as he took the book in hand, fingers gripping it far tighter than reasonably necessary. He doesn’t want to know more, none of them do, but a terrible sense of sickeningly morbid curiosity is what drives him to turn the page and begin to read aloud to the room at large.

1 December, 1987

The wind and snow has been battering against the castle walls and sending a terrible cold throughout the corridors all day. My teeth haven’t been able to stop chattering and I worry Oliver might be coming down with a cold the way he keeps sneezing and coughing into his sleeve.

Ginny smiled. “He always cared a lot more than he ever showed…more than any of us ever realized.”

George shot her a crooked grin, but his amusement didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Yeah, looking back on it now….he did. Percy was never good with expressing all his emotions though. So stoic, that one is.”

“Can you really blame him though?” Fred tilted his head back to stare at the ceiling. “We’re bloody bastards for how we've treated him, why he came back….”

The room went silent for the moment.

Fred sighed and finished off his thought. “Why he came back I’ll never know.”

A snow storm coming on is the absolute last thing anyone needs. I had to pull my scarf up over my mouth and nose to keep myself semi-warm.

The cold was almost enough to distract me from my classes.

Almost.

The atmosphere tensed as if any movement will sever their reality.

She won’t leave me alone, 

Bill took a deep breath, barely reigning his temper in before his younger siblings could see. They can’t do anything now, but that doesn’t mean hearing about what happened to his brother doesn’t enrage him.

I can feel her eyes on my skin all throughout defense against the dark arts once more and bile kept rising to the back of my throat.

“Perce…fuck.” Charlie swallowed the lump in his throat and bit back the tears that threatened to spill down his cheeks.

I hate her.

I really hate her.

He let a single fat tear drip down his face, and he knew without looking that he’s not alone.

3 December, 1987

Oliver did indeed get sick, 

The twins both gave a weak chuckle with little energy.

despite himself claiming otherwise. He’s been buried under his covers all morning and I had to convince both professor McGonagall and Madame Pomfrey that he was in no shape to attend classes.

Only after a personal visit from Pomfrey did they secede and excuse him from classes for the remainder of the week (which is only two days, to be fair).

He still seems well enough to joke, it appears, 

“As he should.”

“Shut it Georgie.”

and I do not appreciate being referred to as his nursemaid.

Ron chuckles to himself quietly.

Perhaps if this behavior of his persists I could ask Audrey or Penelope to take over for me. Though it would be a challenge to sneak them into Gryffindor tower.

“I’m sure Percy could figure it out.” Ginny shared a look with Charlie and they bumped shoulders. “Couldn’t he?”

“Oh, I’m almost positive he could and would.” Charlie winked and ruffled her red hair.

No, it’s not worth McGonagall’s wrath or Oliver’s puppy-dog eyes.

Maybe.

“Puppy dog eyes!” Fred cried out and tossed his arms into the air. “Is that all we had to do to get our way? What gives Perce?!”

“To be fair,” Charlie cut in. “I highly doubt your puppy eyes would work on Percy.”

“Not cool Percy!”

5 December, 1987

Oliver is still sick and being a right thorn in my side about it. Though, I can’t bring myself to become too annoyed with him.

“He can be such a mother hen.”

He’s currently upset and pouting about staying inside on a Saturday instead of participating in the raging Gryffindor versus Slytherin snowball fight.

Charlie shared a look with Bill, grinning faintly. “Oh, I remember that alright.”

“I’m sure you do, Charles.” Bill narrowed his eyes. Their four younger siblings looked back and forth between the two, brows creased and furrowed in their confusion.

According to Penelope, it’s verging on an all out war.

Charlie snickered and Bill shot another glare in his direction.

I haven’t been to the quad today, but I’ve heard plenty via word of mouth and it sounds like the snowball fight took a nasty turn.

The snickering turns a little louder.

In all fairness, that’s to be expected when it’s Slytherins and Gryffindors pitted against one another.

“Such an understatement.”

Oliver’s sore that he’s missing most likely the best snow day of the year, especially after some second year let it slip that Charlie had joined in the fray of battle amongst his compatriots. Oli’s words, not mine.

Charlie finally gave in and let out a loud bellow of a laugh, his voice pitching higher when Bill swat him with one of the couch’s throw pillows.

“Okay, what gives?!” Ron threw his hands in the air. “What happened during the snowball fight?”

“Yeah, what’d you do Charlie?” Ginny laughed and dodged the pillow that somehow ends up getting tossed in her direction.

“Yeah, Charlie. Tell our adoring siblings that look up to you what. You. did.” Bill seethed and tried grabbing the other throw pillow, but Ron snatched it away before the room could break into an impromptu couch pillow fight.

The second oldest took a deep, steadying breath to quiet his laughter. “Weeelll. I started by helping my fellow Gryffindors of course–”

“What happened next, Charlie.” Bill cut him off and Charlie smirked at his older brother.

“I sort of…maybe….defected?”

“Defected.” George repeated as his twin gasped in that overtly dramatic manner they're known for.

Charlie nodded. “A few sixth and seventh year Gryffindors were clearly targeting the small first and second year Slytherins – they barely let the poor kids get up before they started pelting them more!”

“Damn, now that’s unfair.” Ron murmured.

“Yes! So I jumped sides to help the poor things and well…one of my snowballs may have gone awry in the chaos.” He gave an apologetic look towards Bill. “And somehow ended up smacking Bill in the face."

Ginny whispered a quiet “betrayal” with eyes wide and an amused expression covering her face.

The boys were laughing amongst themselves, minus Bill that is.

“Yeah, yeah, laugh it up. I haven’t forgotten, Charlie, and I still have yet to get my revenge.” Bill swatted at Charlie’s laughing figure.

“Awe, c’mon Bills, that was almost thirteen years ago! Let it go!”

“Not happening!”

Ginny nudged Ron and nodded towards Percy’s diary in his lap, silently urging him to continue reading before war broke out in their living room. Again.

Ron took the hint.

Hot cocoa should cheer him up though, he and Penelope have such raging sweet teeth that I’m surprised their teeth aren’t rotting out of their skulls. Maybe I could scrounge up a few extra pumpkin pasties while I’m at it.

Bill’s previous annoyance at Charlie morphed into this unknown foreign feeling…almost like something was going to happen or this was Percy’s unintentional foreshadowing.

I’ve had a real hankering for them as of late and they’ve always made me feel better when everything becomes too much. My comfort food, if you will.

That feeling didn’t dissipate and only grew with each sentence.

Yes, yes. I know. Eating my feelings isn’t healthy 

Ginny tilted her head, glancing up towards Bill.

and I promise I don’t, pumpkin pasties just make me happier for a short while. Everyone needs something.

“Percy.” Bill whispered. ‘What more is going to happen to him? What else won’t I be able to save him from?’

7 December, 1987

With the winter holidays fast approaching, McGonagall’s began to collect the names of those staying at Hogwarts over the break. I wouldn’t be, and neither would Penelope; although both Audrey and Oliver would be staying — as well as only a small handful of first years.

The snow is building with the weather worsening with each day that goes by and Oliver’s fever is thankfully fading, though he’s still bedridden for the time being.

“Heh, poor Oliver,” Fred chortles.

I feel as if the weather is affecting my temperament, each day brings me down further into this dark little place that’s terrifying. 

Ginny breathed in a short gasp, eyes locking onto the book and ignoring her brothers as they look towards each other.

I don’t like thinking about that place.

Her eyes had started beading up with tears again, but she held them back for the time being.

In some cases ignorance is bliss and I’m adamant to ignore it until it eventually vanishes.

“P-Percy…” Charlie rubs the back of his neck. He’s eleven….he’s fucking eleven. He shouldn’t be feeling like this….he should…should…Charlie doesn’t even know, but Percy shouldn’t have to go through this. No one should.

I’m scared of it swallowing me.

Ginny lets a few tears fall and scrubs at her face with the palm of her hand.

Ron’s not much better, nor are the twins. Charlie’s face is crestfallen and Bill…Bill is stoic, expression refusing to give away the turmoil that are his thoughts.

8 December, 1987

Charlie’s birthday is Saturday, he’ll be turning 15 this year. That’s a positive. I’ve been trying to think of happy, positive things lately; even when they don’t affect me.

The room was quiet, solemn in a way unheard of for the Burrow. Not since the twins were born at the very least. It’s the silence of heartbreak.

I’ll see Penelope in Charms and Audrey in Herbology today. Two positives.

Ginny tried her best to smile. He has more friends than they realized, people that would no doubt would help him in a heartbeat…if only Percy were the type to admit when he needs help.

He’s not though, he never was.

I have DADA today. That’s not a positive.

Bill’s face hardens even more, eyes nearly burning a hole into the worn, stained rug that’s probably older than their great grandfather.

Bill’s helping me study for Transfiguration later. Positive! So many positives. So many…

Why do I still feel so bad?

Bill thumbed away a tear, took a deep breath and forced himself to stay sitting. Charlie’s wasn't much better next to him, but no one could really blame them, now could they?

9 December, 1987

My stomach hurts. I felt sick to the point that I couldn’t keep my breakfast down.

Positive — Oliver’s finally well enough to come back to class, much to his chagrin.

The twins let out matching, empty laughs, so unreal and full of nothing people associate with the duo.

I’ve offered to help him catch up on school work, but he just boo’d and skulked in the library during lunch.

“S-Sounds like Oliver, alright…”

10 December, 1987

Positives may just be pointless, after all. It’s stupid. I’m stupid.

“No!” Ron’s nails dug into the book, threatening to puncture the delicate paper and ruin Percy’s words. “You’re not stupid Perce…You’ve never been stupid…You were just a kid. A goddamn kid…”

I think Oliver can tell I’m a little down, he seems to always know.

“Oliver was always able to read Percy…like an open book, eheh.” Fred pulled his knees up to his chest, resting his chin on top and staring blankly at the old grandfather clock across the room.

“Perce, you feeling okay?” I remember him asking at least a dozen times today. I just nodded, plastered on a smile and tried my best to reassure him every time. 

“How good he must have gotten at faking a smile, how good he must be at lying,” George huffed and slumped further in his seat. “Even to himself.”

Charlie bit his cheek to keep from replying, he doesn't know what he’d say, but he knows that he’s on the brink of exploding. Anger and hurt are simmering together inside of him and he might not be able to keep it from boiling over for much longer.

I don’t think he believes me, but I’m not going to tell him any different. It’s not right to burden him with my own personal issues and situation.

‘Percy…how much are you hurting?’ Bill lifted his gaze from the rug to stare at the mix-matched ceiling tiles. ‘How often have you lied to yourself and buried everything? How much poison is filling your veins? You must be so angry, hurt, and betrayed. I’m sorry…I’m so goddamn sorry I left you in this misery. I promise I won’t again. After this…you can push and push and push me away all you want, but I won’t leave you alone again. Not after knowing this. Fuck…I’m so bloody sorry.’

No matter how much I want to.

Bill’s stoicism cracked just enough to let a few tears dribble from the corners of his eyes and down his face, soaking his cheeks and staining his shirt.

‘I’m sorry.’

11 December, 1987

Friday. It’s finally Friday and I might just be able to get away with hiding in my dormitory all weekend. 

“That’s not healthy,” Ginny sighed. “Hiding away from the world like that…it’s damaging to your mental health.”

Well, sort of. Tomorrow’s Charlie’s birthday and I made him a stupid little drawing of a Peruvian Vipertooth. 

Charlie’s head jerked towards the book, an expression of surprise mixed with fondness. Oh…he remembered that clear as day. It was framed in his cabin in Romania, right above the desk in his home office.

The scene I drew has it protecting its nest and hatchlings from humans.

Ginny smiled at her older brother, resting a hand on his knee.

Charlie’s been on a whole tirade lately of how unjust and cruel it was that they were nearly wiped out by a Wizarding extermination squad after the breed’s numbers grew dangerously high in the late 19th century.

“He…He was actually listening to me?”

I can understand population control was necessary, 

Charlie bristled and his brow twitched.

the Vipertooth is highly venomous and with their small size….well, it was a bad situation all around, but I can agree with Charlie when I say that the extermination squad the International Confederation of Wizards sent out had gotten way too carried away with attempting to reduce the population.

“Oh…he…agrees with me?”

“Percy was always diplomatic, in a way.” Bill nodded towards them and Charlie grins.

I’m rambling again.

12 December, 1987

I didn’t want to get up, my bed just felt too comfortable and inviting; but it’s Charlie’s birthday and I wanted to wish him a happy one and give him the drawing at the very least.

Charlie thought back to his small, two-bedroom cabin with his home office and the treasured drawing that began to yellow and fade with each year that goes by. It’s something so sentimental that reminded him of a much simpler, happy time in their lives.

Well, not as happy for Percy as he had originally thought.

Charlie had practice today and I barely got any time to say happy birthday before he was being carted off towards the pitch by his teammates. He waved my way before going along with them. It’s fine, he’s busy being a quidditch star.

Charlie hung his head. “Damn, I should have made more time for him…maybe then he would have told me…”

“You can’t go blaming yourself Charlie. We all fucked up with Percy.” George tried to give his brother an encouraging smile, but it felt just a little too forced.

“Yeah,” Ron continued. “We'll just have to try harder to make amends with him.”

Too busy for me. Everyone’s always too busy for me and I can’t really blame them. It’s fine. I’m fine.

Someone let out a quiet sob, but no one paid attention as to whom.

I didn’t want to bother Charlie, so I just left the drawing on his bed. He’ll probably be dead tired after practice anyway.

Charlie had known right away when he saw the carefully drawn image. It had made him feel so happy seeing something simple yet heartfelt from his little brother.

It’s been a long, long time since he saw Percy put in that much effort for them. It’s not like they deserve it anyways at this point.

13 December, 1987

Charlie liked the drawing, 

Said man nods as if to confirm.

he told me so last night after I stopped writing. He said he has it hanging above his bed with all the photographs of him with his friends.

I don’t believe him, but the sentiment is nice.

“I hung it up right away…why didn’t he believe me.”

“Insecurity runs rampant in eleven year olds. Especially with Percy.” Bill hums. ‘Especially with his inferiority complex.’

16th December, 1987

The week’s almost over, then we’ll be free for the holidays to return home, or stay here. It’s our choice, after all. I must admit, I’ll be saddened that I won’t be able to see the few friends I actually managed to make at Hogwarts.

I’ve grown much too used to Oliver’s enthusiastic ramblings, Penelope’s poking and prodding (she’s a little nosy, but means well), and even Audrey’s shy silence.

“He really made some good friends, didn’t he?” Ron smiled to himself as he recalled how nerve racking getting on that train for the first time was. He hadn’t known how his first year was going to go, but he thanked his lucky stars for meeting Harry Potter and Hermione Granger.

Penelope has me promising to write, with Oliver’s loud agreeance and Audrey’s silent nodding.

It’s hard to explain, but seeing how much they care and actually enjoy my company fills me with this unknown warm, tingly feeling in my stomach.

Bill caught the various eyes of his siblings, each of them recalling their own terrifying first years.

September first seems so much longer ago than it actually was. I was worried, terrified almost, of having no one to call my friend and now…now I have a small, but endearing friend group that I look forward to seeing each day that goes by.

The second oldest made a silent promise to thank them each for all the care and hope they gave his baby brother.

17th December, 1987

The castle is abuzz with excitement as Saturday grows nearer and nearer; so close, yet so far.

Students are talking about holiday plans, who’s staying and who’s going, gift ideas and what they hope their parents will get them. The older years are even teasing each other about who is staying with whose family over the break.

The twins gave Bill and Charlie a look, waggling their eyebrows and making kissy faces.

Whatever that means. Sleepovers aren’t that big a deal.

Ginny giggles – “He’ll understand when he’s older!”

“Ginny?!”

“Nothing! Nothing at all!”

Maybe I’m missing something again.

19th December, 1987

I have to admit, as much as I love Hogwarts, it’s good to be home to see my family.

They smiled. At least something positive about them. Percy was happy to see them. Hopefully it stays light-hearted for a bit.

Oliver and Audrey had bid Penelope and I goodbye in the Great Hall this morning before we were to leave for the Express waiting to take us back to London.

I passed Marcus Flint

A few of them seethed and shook their heads.

on the way, he just shoved by me and headed into the Great Hall himself. It seems he’d be staying as well. Penelope glared at his retreating back and linked her pinky with mine.

“Awe! She’s so caring and sweet and nice and why couldn’t Percy stay with her?” Ginny continued her rambling under her breath after Bill flicked her ear in warning.

“Someone’s in a bad mood,” she had scoffed.

“He’s always in a bad mood,” Fred had cut in.

“He’s always in a bad mood, I feel,” was my reply.

“See?”

The ride itself was enjoyable, Penny and I had a cart to ourselves where we were mostly left alone; though Bill and Charlie did poke their heads in to check on me before disappearing down the hall with their friends.

“Any plans for the holidays, Percy?”

“Reading and studying mostly.”

“Boo! Boring! Boring Percy!” That was George who shut up when Fred elbowed him in the gut hard enough to leave him keeled over and heaving.

Penny blew a raspberry and loudly proclaimed that I was boring and needed to loosen up one of these days.

“She — blegh! — She agrees!” George huffed and continued his heaving.

I smiled. It doesn’t feel like she’s looking down on me or ridiculing me when she says these things, 

They all looked away from each other in embarrassment and shame.

it feels like…well, I’m not exactly sure how to describe the feeling, but I do know that I enjoy the feeling.

Penny got me a box of Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans from the trolley and we had a fun time recoiling and laughing at the different tastes, both delicious and horrendous.

Ron made a disgusted look as he recalled some of the more gross tastes he’s experienced from the popular candy.

Though, it did eventually have to come to an end like all things as the Hogwarts Express pulled into King’s Cross.

The train is a zoo as everyone is rushing, pushing, and shoving each other to be the first ones off the train and into their family’s waiting arms. I’m much slower than most, cringing and pulling away when I’m jostled by others trying to get through.

“Right,” their sister frowns. “He doesn’t like crowds…I forgot…” Ron pats her on the shoulder before continuing on with his reading.

As we stepped onto the bustling platform, Penelope gave me a hug before she, too, was off and joining her own family.

I was looking this way and that for any sign of red hair and nearly gave up before a heavy hand lay on my head and Bill’s low, rumbling laugh filled my ears.

Bill perked up the tiniest bit.

“A little overwhelming, isn’t it?” He was smiling and ruffling my hair.

“A little,” I had agreed.

“C’mon, let’s find Charlie’s dragging arse and then mum and dad.”

The dragonologist was honest to Merlin pouting. “Oi! Talking shite about me to our baby brother? How cruel William.”

“It’s hard not to.” Bill smirked and tugged on Charlie’s ear. His brother made a squawking noise and swatted at him with one hand.

Bill helped me with my trunk, on top of his own as we spent longer than necessary tracking Charlie down, then our family.

“How are you so strong…” Fred narrowed his eyes.

“Magic” is Bill’s reply.

“Bull-fucking-shite.

Mum was smothering me like I knew she would.

A few of them smiled at the mention of their sometimes overbearing mother. Oh, who are they kidding? She’s frequently and heavily overbearing.

The moment she saw us, she was latching on and nearly suffocating us in her hugs.

Only…only when it was my turn, the moment my mother wrapped her arms around me…I froze.

Bill felt sick suddenly, stomach acid and bile burning at the back of his throat as horror and disgust filled him. ‘Oh…oh no…Oh, Percy…fuck….’

I felt sick to my stomach at the touch and felt bile at the back of my throat as if I was on the verge of puking, but unable to.

Ginny began silently crying again, shoulders shaking and nearly heaving her lunch up as well. The others looked much the same as realization dawned on them one by one.

I realized with horrifically devastating clarity that I couldn’t stand the touch of my own mother.

Ginny wailed and she was followed closely behind by one of the twins – maybe Fred.

It made my skin crawl, even though my mother has never hurt me in my life.

Why did this happen, why is any of this even happening?

Ron dropped the book as if it had burned him, horror and sickness across his green tinted face. “I-I need a moment. Fuck…just fuck!” He buried his head in his hands and stood up.

Bill bit back the bile and nodded in agreement. “We all need a moment, I think.”

They dispersed, going in different directions and leaving Percy’s diary open on the floor.

Fred and George had disappeared upstairs, Ron to the garden outside, Ginny went upstairs with the twins (though Bill heard the distinct creaking that belonged definitively to Percy’s childhood bedroom door), Charlie went off to Merlin knows where, and Bill…Bill headed into the kitchen for a glass of water to wash the acrid taste from his tongue.

He stood there, though, hands on the sink and shoulders hunched as he took in deep, shuddering breaths. Percy…his brother…

“You okay?” Charlie’s voice broke through, but Bill didn’t dare turn to face him.

“Do I look fucking okay to you?” Bill grit his teeth and shakily filled a glass with water from the tap, chugging it down in three large gulps before filling it with more.

His brother shifts from the doorway, dropping heavily into one of the many clashing kitchen chairs. “That was a stupid question, huh?”

“Real bloody stupid.” Bill downed another glass of water before setting the it on the counter and turning to face Charlie. “Percy…”

“I know.”

“He could…he could have said something…anything!” Bill rubbed at his eyes with his thumb and forefinger, deep shuddering breaths shook his frame with every inhale.

“I think…” Charlie paused. “I think that his first year was when he began pulling away from us and the family. He never felt like our brother….always the black sheep I suppose.”

“Charlie! How could you say that? He’s our brother and he should have–” Bill cut himself off and lets out a choked, muffled sob. “No–no this isn’t Perce’s fault. It’s ours. We pushed him away, made him feel like nothing and now…now when he’s hurting and in pain he refuses to reach out. He keeps his distance, only coming around for Sunday dinners. Doesn’t tell us anything about his life anymore.” Charlie’s silent, hunched over the table with his head laying on his folded arms and staring at his older brother.

Bill slammed a fist against the counter top and sent his empty glass tumbling into the sink. “He’s…he’s my brother – our brother – but he might as well be a stranger we pass on the street and it’s all our bloody fault. How could we not have noticed? We’re such awful, awful people, Charles and…and…” His voice broke off in another hitched sob. “I don’t know how to fix this.”

Charlie’s eyes were red-rimmed and glassy as he waited for Bill to take another deep breath before cutting in. “Percy needs help and I have a feeling no one knows how much, not even us. He was eleven and being taken advantage of…he’s always been a people pleaser, that one, and we still haven’t seen the magnitude of it. Imagine his years at the ministry or out living on his own–”

“Don’t.” Bill held up a hand. “I don’t think I can fucking handle any more of those thoughts right now.”

Charlie quieted himself and nods. “We fucked up.”

“Yeah…”

A quiet voice clearing caught their attention.

“Guys?” Ginny’s peeking into the kitchen in almost the same manner as she had when they were kids.

Bill cleared his throat and thumbed away his remaining tears. “Yeah, Gins?”

“The others…they want to keep going if that’s okay?”

“Yeah…” Charlie answered and Bill was grateful he didn’t have to talk. “Yeah, we’re coming, just give us a sec, would ya?”

Ginny nodded and disappeared back toward the living room.

“Bills?” Charlie stood and stepped closer, clapping one hand down on the other’s shoulder. “You good enough for it?”

The eldest swallowed the lump in his throat and turned to wash his face in the kitchen basin. “Yeah,” he mumbled, voice gone and hoarse.

The two followed after their sister and if anyone noticed his red eyes then they didn’t say anything. The twins took Bill and Charlie’s spots on the couch with Ginny seated between them and Ron sat on the floor next to them.

Percy’s diary was laying in his lap, opened to the next entry and waiting to be unwillingly omitted for the room’s occupants to hear.

Bill swallowed, glanced at Charlie, and sat on the loveseat with his brother falling into the space next to him.

“Ready?”

“Ready.”

20th December, 1987

The first morning home was as if we never left for school. Ginny was ecstatic that we were home, though the twins and Ron couldn’t seem to care less. 

The mentioned three shared similar looks – a mix between guilty and bashful.

Dad still kissed mum on the cheek at breakfast, the twins were plotting their newest prank (and no, there was no apology for Halloween), 

“We’ll…” Fred looked towards his brother, who nodded with a shake of his head. “We’ll apologize the next chance we get.

and Ron and Ginny were complaining how they wanted to go to Hogwarts too.

Ginny nudged Ron who nudged her back only for her to tug at a piece of his hair in retaliation.

Bill and Charlie hadn’t left their room yet, most likely wanting to catch up on sleeping in. Mum most likely wouldn’t let them.

Of course she wouldn’t – some of them smiled at that. If you weren’t up by 10, you were considered full of lazy bones in Molly Weasley’s home. Unless, of course, you were Harry Potter.

Despite everything, even my newest heartbreaking revelation…

Ginny choked back a sob.

it’s still good to be home in a familiar atmosphere.

I missed them more than I realized.

There were misty eyes all around, welling up with tears.

21st December, 1987

The twins didn’t waste any time trying their games with us.

The two cringed.

They’ve been switching identities all day and it’s driving our parents up the wall. One moment Fred is George and the next he’s Fred again.

Fred smiled to himself. “I remember we used to play that game all the time, it’s been a long time…not since…” The war went unsaid, but George shared his brother’s smile all the same.

I go along with their games, even though I see nothing but absurdity with it.

Ever since they were born, I could tell those two apart without a moment’s pause. 

Fred and George jerked their heads upwards, eyes wide and mouths hanging open. Ron couldn’t help but let out a half-hearted snicker at their expressions.

“He…he could…”

“All this time…”

Whilst they share the same face, they are both completely different individuals.

George sagged into the couch, hands twitching as an oddly warm feeling filled his chest.

Percy knew them. Percy knew who was who without hesitation…but he always got them wrong…Percy– 

They laugh when I mistakenly call them by the wrong name.

I’ll never tell them it was a deliberate mistake though, I’ll continue to let them believe that these games of theirs work.

George swallowed the lump in his throat as it felt clogged from rampant emotions. Fred looked to be in the same boat as he…Percy had always known, but played along all because….because it made them laugh.

23rd December, 1987

Christmas Eve is upon us and Mum is out Christmas shopping while Dad tinkers away in the shed.

We won’t get much, 

They never did, but the Holidays were about more than gifts.

a gift each at least, but I still appreciate the work they do every holiday all the same.

They all did, even when mum was doling out the grueling Holiday workload. It was worth it come Christmas day.

That reminds me, I hope Oli, Penny, and Audrey like the drawings I made for them for Christmas, they should hopefully arrive on time. I have very little to my name, so this was the most I could do for them for the Holidays. I hope they understand.

“It’s the thought that counts Percy.” Ginny dabbed at the corners of her eyes with Charlie’s handkerchief; a small, fond smile on her face.

Damn it, I nearly spilt ink all over this page. One thing I didn’t miss was the explosions coming from the Twins’ room.

The two cringed yet again and mumbled quiet apologies to no one,

Technicalities, nevertheless.

24th December, 1987

Mum’s fluttering about the kitchen, cooking up a storm and yelling at anyone who so much as dares to enter her domain while she’s so busy.

Ron leaves the kitchen with watery eyes when mum swatted his knuckles with a wooden spoon after catching him trying to sneak a cookie.

Ron blushed at the memory and subconsciously rubbed his knuckles before turning the page and ignoring his siblings' semi-amused faces.

It’s loud and boisterous, but I missed the homey smells and noise…

“He missed us…” Charlie whispers. “Maybe there’s still hope for amends, Bills?”

“Maybe.”

my room that seems so different since I left it…even the blasted gnomes that dad, Bill, and Charlie are currently fighting with as they de-gnome the yard before tomorrow. All the snow makes their job more difficult than it needs to be.

Both Bill and Charlie shared a distasteful look and shuddered at the memory of many holidays spent de-gnoming their bloody garden.

It’s still amusing to watch through the living room window though.

“Of course it was.” Fred groused. “Mum never made Percy de-gnome anything…”

George rolled his eyes. “She always left the ghoul to him, Percy was the only one it would listen to, ‘member?”

“Oh yeah, fine I’ll let it pass this time.”

Fred, George, Ron and Ginny are all giggling and shoving each other for a better view.

I’ll keep saying it…it’s really good to be home.

Bill smiled. It’s so good knowing Percy still cared after everything they’ve done to damage their relationships with him.

25th December, 1987

Christmas morning is noisy (like always) as the sound of feet thundering down the steps is what woke me this morning.

I tried to cover my head with the pillow and go back to sleep, but I guess it wasn’t meant to be as tiny fists began to pound on my door.

Ginny blushed in embarrassment and rubbed the back of her neck.

“Percy!” Ginny’s voice was a high-pitched wail as she continued to drum her fists into my door.

The twins took turns ruffling her hair.

When I didn’t respond, she huffed loudly and came in anyways which isn’t that unusual. She used to barge into my room all the time when she was younger, climb into my bed and fall asleep after having a nightmare.

“Awe! Gin-Gin!” The twins mock cry and wrap their arms around her, much to her annoyance as she fights to be freed from their death grips.

“Percy.” She repeated with a pout lacing her voice. “Get up, everyone’s up already! Even Billy and CharChar!” 

“Heh…CharChar….”

She struggled to pull herself up onto my bed, crawling forward to wrestle my pillow out of my hands.

“Don’t wanna…”

The playful fighting settled and the atmosphere grew a little tenser from each second that passed by.

She paused, most likely confused by my out of character response….but it was true, I didn’t wanna get out of bed….I didn’t see the point.

Bill dragged a hand down his face, worn and tired and all too pissed at the world.

Percy was eleven and didn’t see the point in getting out of bed on Christmas day.

It’s fucked. The world is fucked.

“Pleeeeeaaaasssse.” She drew it out in a whine that grated against my ears. I finally conceded and tossed the pillow to the side and sat up.

“Sucker.”

Ginny had given me the biggest, widest grin of triumph she could muster as she scrambled out of my bed and to the doorway.

She waited patiently even with her jittery nerves as I dragged myself out of bed and into the hall.

Ginny is a ball of energy as always, running down the stairs and nearly tripping herself half a dozen times in her haste.

She smiles. “My tooth is still chipped from falling down those stairs when I was thirteen.”

“Percy.” Mum smiles at me as I take a seat between Fred and Ron on the old, worn out loveseat that had to have seen at least three generations of Weasley’s before me.

Bill and Charlie snickered. They were sitting on that exact same love seat.

The remainder of this morning was sort of a blur after dad began to pass out the presents. The first thing I received was my newest Weasley jumper – a soft thing colored teal with a golden P on the front.

I loved it.

Ron frowned as the twins look towards each other than the rest of the room. “He…liked them? Really?”

My parents also gifted me a worn historical fiction book and Bill and Charlie pitched in to get me a brand new scarf in gryffindor colors. I smiled to myself as I wrapped it around my neck and cradled the book to my chest.

‘Something as simple as a scarf and book makes him happy’ Charlie swallowed and eyed Bill’s tense figure.

“Oh! Look what we have here!” Dad exclaims after handing Bill a gift slyly that had a disgustingly pink, heart patterned wrapping paper.

The twins gagged and Ron followed suit with the reminder of how sickeningly sweet a certain someone had been during their relationship.

“Even Percy can see how gag-worthy that was!”

Bill silenced the lot of them with a glare – eyes narrowed and burning holes right through their heads.

It doesn’t take a genius to know it’s from his girlfriend, Rose.

Mum giggles as dad picks up three small, individually wrapped, parcels. “For Percy, I believe. They must be from your new friends, hm?”

“They really are the best, aren’t they?”

My face reddens as the twins snicker and dad sets the gifts in my lap.

Fred looks mildly embarrassed, though George has an indifferent expression.

“Percy doesn’t have friends.” George guffaws.

“Oh….right…I remember that.” George looked anywhere besides the four sets of glaring eyes.

“Yeah! No-friend-Percy.” Fred continues.

Fred winced. “Blimey. Me too. We’re real arses to him, aren’t we?”

“No bloody kidding."

Mum smacks the back of their heads and I just hang mine. I shouldn’t be surprised by their reactions to anything in my life at this point. It’s just…it’s not worth it.

Fred groaned quietly, hiding his face behind his hands as George made a few notes in their notebook. It’s slowly becoming fuller and fuller with each passage they read.

The conversation picks up then, the attention turned away from me and towards the twins and their attention-seeking behavior.

“Attention-seeking….” George whispered as Ginny slapped his thigh lightly.

“He’s not wrong, you know.”

“Yeah, yeah, we know.”

I remember I smiled down at the small parcels in my lap; they were the first ever gifts I received from friends — my first friends ever. This means more to me than words could ever say.

"And we tried to dampen his joy…just for a laugh.”

I didn’t open them in front of my family and no one noticed or they chose not to comment at that moment.

‘Never noticed, always hidden…always alone’ Bill closed his eyes and rubbed his aching head.

I’m thankful for that at least.

Later, after the morning had calmed down and mum went back to the kitchen, my brothers and dad went out to enjoy the snowfall with little ginny. I chose to stay indoors even when it made Ron and the twins whine when I refused to join them in the cold.

“It wouldn’t have killed him to have joined us…” Ron sulked.

Ginny rolled her eyes and kicked at the back of her brother’s head. “You lot would have been menaces towards him!”

Only when I was in my room, alone, is when I opted to unwrap the gifts. Each parcel had a name on it — from Oliver, from Penelope, from Audrey. I allowed myself a smile and opened Audrey’s gift first.

It’s the smallest of the three and inside is a delicate looking handkerchief with what I assumed was hand embroidery along the hem. Some of the stitching looked messy; but it was delightful all the same in its soft orange color with burgundy trim and embroidery.

Charlie had a faint memory of the last time he saw Percy nearly two weeks ago. He smiled as that sounds very close to the hanky he saw tucked in the pocket of his baby brother’s coat. All these years and he kept a damn hanky of all things.

Penelope’s gift was wrapped with a bow for a bit of extra-flourish I’m assuming, knowing her. I almost feel bad opening it, though I’m happy I did.

It’s a set of purple candles that give off such a blissfully sweet fragrance that I feel like I may never burn them.

The scent is a sort of mix between sea salt and grapefruit with a stormy sort of undertone to it. It makes me think of the beach just after a devastating storm.

Ginny giggles. “That sounds just like Penelope to get him that. It fits Percy perfectly!”

I left Oliver’s gift for last.

The twins winked at each other over Ginny’s head.

A quill set.

He got me a quill set with the prettiest, softest feather I’ve ever seen. It rested in a decorative box. The feather was full and lush, colored a deep burgundy with the barest tinting of black. It came with 6 separate nibs that could be switched out, a black inkwell, and a decorative stand.

“It’s just a quill, why’s he sound so excited about it?” Ron mumbled, nose scrunching and making a distasteful expression.

“Probably because it’s from Oli~” George and Fred snickered to themselves.

It’s something simple, yet unique and it honestly might be my favorite gift this year. I’ll have to write Oliver, as well as Penelope and Audrey of course.

The rest of Christmas day is delightful and I can’t wait for mum to finish cooking preparations.

Ah, speak of the devil. She’s come calling.

“I wonder how mum would feel hearing Perce calling her the devil?” Charlie hides his smile behind the palm of his hand, though Ginny starts snickering along with the twins.

31st December, 1987

New Year's Eve is here and it’s been quiet, much too quiet.

That’s never good in the Burrow.

I think the twins are plotting something devious once more, but I’m not intervening, I’ll just have to sit back and watch the mayhem inevitably unfold.

Bill gave a faint smirk and stretched his arms above his head, as Ron handed the book off to Ginny. “Well then, I told you Percy had his mischievous moments. He’s just waiting to watch you two crash and burn.”

The twins were looking at each other and pouting, but otherwise quiet.

“I think,” their eldest brother continued. “It’s time for another break before we go on. It’s getting late, and I’m emotionally exhausted.”

The younger four were whining at being treated like little kids as Charlie corralled them out of the living room and toward the stairs. Bill plucked Percy’s journal out of Ginny’s hands and held it close to his chest, nudging his sister upstairs.

“Bill?” Charlie murmured.

“I just…I’m just tired Charlie.”

“If you say so.”

Chapter Text

Sleep didn’t come easy for any of them that night, but why should it? Guilt and shame gnaw at them like an infection – digging in and spreading until eventually it’ll either kill them or they’ll be forced to amputate the infected part.

Twisting and turning, waking and sweating, tears and anger.

They’ve willingly put on rose-tinted glasses throughout their lives when it came to Percy. He was the black sheep – the arrogant, pompous arse…but he wasn’t. Percy cared for them, knew them all better then they might know themselves. He listened and saw them for what they were.

He was a better, compassionate man than they had originally thought….he kept that part hidden beneath the surface leaving his family blinded to who he was as a person.

None of them slept.

As the morning light filtered through the windows, Bill dragged himself from the very short sleep he had gotten.

Dawn on the horizon and heavy-limbed, they all trudged down the steps for breakfast. None of them were really that hungry, but they scavenged throughout the kitchen for anything quick and easy to munch on. It’s quiet, not a word spoken and not a sound made.

That is until Ginny finally breaks the tension. “Are we…gonna keep going? It’s my turn to read, innit?”

Bill swallowed a mouthful of scalding, strong coffee — burning his tongue and the roof of his mouth in the process. “I think we should, as much as I don’t want to hear more. I need to.” Charlie gives a silent nod in agreement.

Ron crossed his arms after finishing off his cereal in record time. “We’ve already invaded his privacy enough, he’s going to bloody lose it when he realizes it’s gone and when he finds out we have it? And we read it? He’s gonna go mental.”

George and Fred are mildly fighting over the last apple as they answer.

“I agree with Ronnie-kins.” Fred snatched the apple out of his twin’s hand and took a large bite in triumph. “This may damage our relationship further.”

“I disagree, Freddie.” George glared and lunged for the apple, only for Fred to side-step him. “Percy would have never told us any of this stuff and I’m furious on his behalf. I may just get locked up in Azkaban if I ever see that bitch in person.”

Bill cuffed both twins upside the head and gave them a disapproving look. “If you don’t want to continue, you can stay in your rooms; but the rest of us…the rest of us are going to keep reading.”

Fred and Ron shared a look, glanced towards the rest of their siblings, and then each gave a relatively long sigh. “Fine,” they said simultaneously.

Bill nodded and looked around the room. “Anything else?” The lot of them either shook their heads or voiced quiet no’s.

One by one, they’ve made their way into the living room to find a seat – Ginny sat with Ron in the loveseat, Charlie and Bill on the couch, and the twins on opposite sides of the room on the floor.

Bill looked down at the cover of Percy’s diary after picking it up from the coffee table where he had left it. He hesitated a moment before passing it off to Ginny. She frowned and opened it. “1st January, 1988….”

1st January, 1988

New Year's day is full of plenty of moaning and groaning. I was right about the twins and they’re in a world of trouble.

“What on Earth did you two do?” Bill crosses his arms with a raised brow, unimpressed.

“Nothing,” the two of them cried in unison.

They’ve gone and spiked mum and dad’s drinks last night with Merlin knows what.

“Fred! George!” Bill groans as the memory of that particularly night filters into his braid. The others all either giggle outright or hide behind their hands.

Fred immediately points to his twin. “It was George’s idea! Honest!”

“Oh, that’s bollocks!” George retaliated by hitting him with the nearest throw pillow.

And poor Ginny stole a sip from mum’s cup as well. 

Grinny grimaces and tosses two separate throw pillows at her brothers’ faces. “You daft fucks!”

I don’t think I’ve ever seen our mum so angry with them (or hungover that is). 

As their various memories recall, none of the siblings can seem to think up a single time they saw either of their parents drink.
 
Where they got the stuff, I don’t think we’ll ever know.

The two share a look and mimic zipping their mouths shut with a shared wink.

It seems the rest of them will never get the answer to that question.

2nd January, 1988

As with all things, our holidays have to come to an end as well and we’ll be leaving for Hogwarts once again tomorrow morning.

I’m eager to see my friends and to return to my studies, 

Charlie smiles slightly.

but not so eager for other things.

I suppose that’s just how school is, though.

Ron leans over to glance at the neat writing in his sister’s hand, a sad look twisting his face. His brothers share similar looks; some with a mix of anger and some with embarrassment.

I already have my trunk packed, 

“Of course he does,” Charlie hums.

it’s better to be ready the night before anyways and the morning can be spent going over what you’ve packed and double checking to make sure you haven’t forgotten anything.

‘Ever the prepared, overachiever. Huh, Perce?’ Bill tilts his head back to stare at the worn out, cracked ceiling. He’d be okay. He’d have to be.

3rd January, 1988

This morning was just as hectic as it had been back in September the very first time I rode the Hogwarts Express. Everyone was rushing about, packing things last minute. 

The Weasley’s (minus Percy) know all too well how much they procrastinate their packing and to do lists. It’s a wonder Percy’s even related to them. If he didn’t have the signature red hair and freckles, then his parentage would be anyone’s guess.

Mum flitting between the twins, Ron, and Ginny to get them ready to see us off at the station. I could hear Ron fighting with Mum about not wanting to wear something, but I couldn’t hear her reply. 

The twins snicker, hiding the noises behind their hands when Ron shoots them an annoyed glare.

I lugged my trunk downstairs before going back up for Scabbers 

Ron grimaces and sticks his tongue out to mimic being sick much to the confusion of his various siblings.

and his cage – he’s not a fan of his cage being jostled as he sleeps, and I felt almost bad. He bit me last night, so I didn’t feel too sorry.

It’s a struggle and fight all the way to King’s Cross, the twins kept arguing and Ron kept whining. Bill and Charlie were teasing little Ginny while Mum and Dad tried to separate George and Fred.

Ginny smirked for a moment, but it fell into an irritated huff when ruffled her hair.

It was emotional for mum (and Ginny) as our family said their goodbyes to us on the platform.

“It always is,” Bill murmurs under his breath.

I remember Bill helping me with my trunk before he disappeared again 

Looks of disappointment are shot Bill’s way, though he’s growing used to the feelings of regret and shame.

and I went searching up and down the different compartments for Penelope as the train began its journey.

Ginny grins as she turns the page. “I always like Penelope, though I’m 100 percent rooting for Oliver.”

Charlie rolls his eyes fondly. “This is our brother’s life, not some twisted love triangle you’d read in a book.” The young woman huffs and ignores her brother, grumbling to herself in the process.

This is when things get a little weird.

They always do, it seems.

I saw Marcus Flint

Bill crosses his arms with a raised brow. If this guy lays another hand on Percy… 

alone in one of the empty compartments towards the back of the train. He looked…dejected?

Charlie shares one of those looks with Bill that they’re both getting a little too used to – like they know more about Percy than the younger four. They do, of course, but that’s besides the point.

“He’s too compassionate for his own good sometimes,” the younger of the two mumbles under his breath just loud enough for only Bill to hear him. The oldest gives a faint nod, glaring at the ceiling and clenching his fists.

Is that the word I want to use? He didn’t look happy, okay, but not angry either – just sad.

“Let that wanker be sad.” Ron tosses his hands in the air.

I was tempted to knock on the door and ask him what’s wrong but fear spiked through me as certain memories came to the forefront. Flint’s a bully, so what if he’s sad, it’s the least he deserves after being such a jerk towards me.

“Maybe not as compassionate as we remember,” Bill sniggers quietly and makes Charlie chuckle.

I turned on my heel and left before he could see me. I don’t want to know what he would have done had he caught sight of my staring; best to avoid him for now.

I did eventually find Penelope and we spent the ride chatting and talking about our breaks. She had spent the break visiting her mother’s family in Spain – she’s muggle-born, with her mother moving to Britain to marry her father.

It was an interesting story, to say the least.

As the Express began to pull into the station hours later, we caught sight of Audrey and Oliver waiting in the Great Hall just as they had been when we left for the holidays.

Ginny smiles. Percy had more people in his corner than they ever realize; where they had failed him, others had held on and kept him afloat. A sad, melancholy feeling sweeps over them.

Audrey and Penelope sat with Oliver and I during dinner instead of at their respective house tables. 

Bill and Charlie share another look. They couldn’t recall ever seeing Percy sitting with friends like that…to be fair, they were never really looking though.

We chatted all throughout dinner about our breaks and though I already knew what Penny had been up to, I was curious about what Oli and Audrey had done all throughout break at the castle.

The youngest Weasley can’t get over how adorable it is that Percy calls Oliver ‘Oli’. Too cute.

Oliver had somehow ended up giving Professor Kettleburn blue hair and even though the old man had been highly amused, he still received three weeks of detention after break and lost us twenty five house points.

The twins grinned at each other, crawling across the living room floor to high five one another in Oliver’s absence. “We should’ve recruited him for a good bit of pranking.”

Ron snorted and rolled his eyes. “I doubted he would have gone along with your schemes.”

“Oh shush.”

Audrey, though, had done nothing too exciting. She and Oliver spent most of the break hanging out and she was there to witness the unfortunate hair coloring incident. (Oliver still won’t tell me how that actually happened and he made Audrey swear to secrecy, that jerk.)

“Boo!” Fred sulked.

“We want to know!” George crossed his arms with a pout.

4th January, 1988

Classes resumed today and as excited as I was, I was unprepared for the vast amount of work our professors piled onto our still jet-lagged minds.

Various forms of cringing and grimaces crossed the siblings’ faces. Professors could be brutal after holiday breaks.

We spent all of potions taking notes on the Wiggenweld potion and began to work with Asphodel in Herbology. Professor Binns assigned us each a five page assignment on the werewolf code of conduct and how it led to the eventual werewolf massacre of 1783 in London, which is due next monday. 

Ron groans and mimes yawning over exaggeratingly.

Besides that we began working on the Mending Charm in charms and how to turn mice into snuffboxes in transfiguration. Least to say, it’s been a busy day back, but I was more than happy to start learning once more.

Charlie hums; of course Percy was.

I had already started my HoM essay in the library during lunch and got about halfway through my initial first draft when Oliver arrived with Audrey and Penelope in tow, carrying both a plate of food for himself and me. 

Ginny grins and claps her hands together. “Percy and Oliver better get together at some point! And if they’re not, then I get to play matchmaker!”

“Ginny,” Bill starts off. “You can’t play matchmaker with Percy’s love life.”

“Watch me.” Her brothers all sigh in either frustration or fondness, she can’t really tell.

I gave him a smile as he set our plates down and dropped heavily into the seat beside me with the girls sitting across from us. “Got to feed that all powerful mind of yours, huh?” He had said. I just swatted at his arms and shoved my books and essay off to the side.

Of course the twins just had to gasp dramatically.

Oliver glanced towards my small stack of schoolwork and seemed to grin. I was using the new quill set he had gifted me for Christmas; though he didn’t mention them and I didn’t bring it up either.

Ginny already has a plot in her head going on the best way to push these two together. Perhaps at once of Oliver’s quidditch matches that she might be able to drag her brother too? No, that’s too public. She’ll come up with something, and maybe drag the twins to her side for help.

It’s shocking just how much I realized I missed my friends.

Oliver should be due back from his first day of detention soon, I should wrap this up and get ready for dinner.

5th January, 1988

Today was just as busy as yesterday and I was dreading it more and more as it went on. I was hoping that lunch would never come so I wouldn’t have to see…see her afterwards in class.

Ginny clenches the book tight in her fists, looking toward Bill first before letting her eyes sweep across the tense faces of the rest of her older brothers.

The best part of break was not having to see her every Tuesday, Wednesday, and Friday; not to mention running into her in the corridors or during meals. It’s near impossible to avoid that woman unless I never left my dormitory, but I couldn’t do that even if I wanted to.

Bill hangs his head, hair covering his eyes to hide the murderous intent behind them. She would pay and she would suffer if Bill had anything to do about it.

My legs felt full of lead as I trudged into class and dropped my school bag next to my seat in the back of the room. Normally I’m front and center in all my classes…just not this one.

Class was good, for the most part. She seemed to ignore me and I was relieved; until she held me after class once again. 

They all lean forward in their seats, nervousness and worry itching at them. Not to mention the never ending dread they felt every time this woman was mentioned.

I tried to come up with a half-hearted excuse, but she wasn’t hearing it. Oliver was staring at me in confusion as I waved him off. I didn’t want to be alone with her, but I didn’t want Oliver to know why.

“He…he could help, though…” Ron mumbles quietly.

“He’s just a kid too, he wouldn’t know how,” Charlie counters solemnly.

I didn’t want anyone to know. At least that’s what I thought at the time.

“Percy…what does that even mean.”

“Percy-” her voice was sickly sweet and it made me want to vomit as she gestured for me to come closer. 

Bill’s nails are digging into the palms of his hand, no doubt leaving small crescent shaped marks in their place from how hard he was squeezing his fists.

She had rounded her desk, rifling through one of the drawers. “I heard you liked pastries,” 

Charlie looked toward Bill, a light panic in his eyes that they shared.

she pulled an orange box with a bow and set it on the desk. Her smile was probably supposed to make me feel warm and comfortable, but instead it was snakelike and sent slivers of fear and anxiety down my spine.

Ginny’s breath picked up; determined to see the passage through, but desperate to finish it as quickly as possible.

She removed the lid on the box. “Particularly pumpkin pasties.” It’s true, I love them and sure enough the box was some of the prettiest, sweetest looking pumpkin pasties I had ever seen. 

A wave of realization washes over them, their faces contorting different forms of sadness, anger, horror, shock….everything under the sun.

It’s terrible, all of this is so. Bloody. Terrible.

She waved me closer and held the open box out to me. “Try one, I bought them from Honeydukes just the other day. They have such delicious treats, don’t you agree?” 

This bitch’s way of manipulation makes Bill feel sick to his stomach. How had he never seen? How could he have let this happen to his little brother.

I didn’t take one like I’m sure she thought I would.

Her smile hardened just the tiniest bit and her eyes narrowed. 

Ginny’s voice picked up in speed, panic filling her very being.

“I said try one. Or should I remove house points for disrespecting a professor who’s just trying to do something nice for one of her favorite students.”

Ron punched the arm of the loveseat, Ginny glancing at him before returning her eyes to Percy’s handwriting. This woman is sick and twisted; how Dumbledore hired her, they’ll never know.

There’s a lump in my throat as I hesitantly plucked one of the pastries from the box and held it up. “Eat. It.” She grit out from between clenched teeth, a false smile still in place.

I took a bite and it felt like cement as I chewed and swallowed. 

Fred felt like gagging and he’s sure he’s not the only one feeling sickened by this.

I felt like vomiting and puking up that single bite along with everything I had eaten at lunch. I forced the bile back and gave her a shaky smile. 

It’s Charlie’s turn to fight back the urge to toss up his breakfast. This is horrible, gross, and so damn disheartening.

That’s what she wanted from me after all, I could tell. 

‘Oh Percy, such a people pleaser even at the expense of your own self…’ Bill grits his teeth.

“It’s…it’s good, professor.” That was a lie, never had I hated the taste of a pumpkin pastie so much in my life, not even when my twice great aunt Muriel tried to do something nice for once and made a homemade batch only to burn them to a crisp. I still ate one then to make her feel better.

It was a small thing, but clearly meant to lighten up the passage with humor even if it didn’t work as well as Percy probably had hoped.

Her smile softened just barely as she set the box down once more and came closer to me. 

“She better not touch him.” George growled quietly.

She placed one heavy hand on my shoulder and stared me down until I took another bite. 

George took a moment to orient himself before he lashed out and hit the closest thing to him, which just so happened to be Ron’s leg.

It was a harder struggle to swallow that bite as well. She rubbed my arm and slid her hand a little higher to the side of my neck.

Ginny slammed the book closed, brows pinched and face looking like she was in pain.

“Gin,” Charlie mumbles across the room.

“I’m…I’m good, just…I just need a moment.” She takes a deep, shuddering breath; her shoulders slouching and her face relaxing into just an expression of pure sadness.

Ginny hesitates before opening Percy’s diary back to where they had left off and continuing.

“You look a lot like your brothers, you know?”

Bill and Charlie swing their heads around to look at each other, their brothers and sister turning to stare at them. 

I was close to wretching as tears began to well up in my eyes. 

Death is too quick and easy for this woman.

I just wanted to leave, hide away forever and never come out. I wanted to crawl into a hole and die.

Ginny ends up letting out a heart-wrenching sob, tears trailing down her cheeks as she tries to fight through them to keep going.

“Professor?” 

The men all lean toward Ginny, desperation in the way they sit…the way they move. Desperate for something, anything to help Percy.

Ice cold horror filled my veins as that all too horrifyingly familiar voice filled the empty classroom. She had removed her hand and stepped away from me, pretending to look down at the paperwork on her desk.

Bill’s shoulders slumped in relief; someone had to have been looking out for his brother that day.

“Mr. Flint.” 

George lurches forward, sharing a wide-eyed stare with his twin. “Flint?” He mouths the name with no sound, watching as Fred nods in surprise. The others are mumbling amongst themselves and Ginny’s still sobbing, albeit quietly.

Of all people to have seen such an awful thing…. “How long have you been standing there?”

“I just opened the door,” Flint spoke easily, as if he didn’t just interrupt and indirectly saved me from such a horrible scene. 

“Why…why do I have a feeling that’s not the truth?” Ron slouches, arms crossed and face pinched.

Maybe…maybe he really didn’t see anything. I can only hope. “I had forgotten my transfiguration book earlier and I need it to finish my essay for Professor McGonagall.” Sure enough, a lone transfiguration book lay on a desk to my right. I didn’t turn to face Flint as his footsteps approached, nor did I acknowledge him.

My throat was hoarse as I found my words. “Are…are we done here Professor?”

“Please, let this be over…” Charlie tosses his head back, staring up at the ceiling and wiping away the single tear that escaped his eye/

I didn’t wait for her response as I rushed out of the room and it wasn’t until later that I noticed I had forgotten my school bag. I’ll just have to grab it tomorrow.

The small group let out a few sighs, some of relief.

“I can’t stand Flint,” Fred grumbles. “But thank Merlin he showed up when he did.”

I nudged past Flint and caught a sight of an odd look on his face. He looked angry…or upset…something along those lines.

“As much of a bastard as he is, he…I don’t know. He’s still a bastard.” Ginny wipes away some of her tears, huffing a long breath.

I didn’t wait to decipher it, my mind was already reeling with too much all at the same time. To hell with going to Charms, I ended up in the girls bathroom, just like a few months ago. Myrtle wasn’t around, at least I think she wasn’t.

“Oh Percy…”

I wretched and heaved into the nearest toilet, emptying my stomach completely until only bile remained to burn my throat. I remember I was sobbing and shaking.

Bill grimaces and bites back the angry words he’d like to speak on Percy’s behalf.

It was a miracle I made it back to my dormitory in one piece. I was hiding under my covers when Oliver came in. He didn’t say anything, but I knew it was him, I always know when it’s him.

He sat on the edge of my bed and rubbed my back but I didn’t look at him or say anything. 

“He’s a–”

“–really good friend.” The twins smile faintly at one another, and, eventually, the others joined in.

He stayed with me for what must have been hours until I could force myself to climb out of bed well after dinner time. 

“Oliver…” Ron chuckles sadly. “Oliver stayed with him that entire time.

I still have Astronomy at midnight, I think I’m good enough to go to that class. Oli’s getting a shower before class and I’m taking this time to write.

I just…I just don’t know what more I can say about what happened. Only that the thought of eating another pumpkin pastie is making my stomach churn.

His favorite treat, something that brought him so much joy and comfort….it was taken from him. That joy was taken from him by this wretched human being.

6th January, 1988

Today was better, in an odd way. 

Off to a positive start, at the very least.

Marcus Flint, the absolute bane of my existence, was waiting outside the Gryffindor dormitory this morning, leaning against one of the nearby railings. Oliver was with me and instantly went into defense mode.

They tense, catching each others’ gazes and fiddling with anything they can  touch – the rug, couch, loose strings, anything to help stifle their nervousness.

“Flint-”

“Relax, Wood.” Flint seems at ease, 

That was a plus, at the very least.

far less aggressive than I’ve ever seen him. “Just dropping something off.” He slides his school bag off his shoulder and holds it up; it took me a second to realize it wasn’t Flint’s bag at all. It was mine, beat and patched up after years of use and abuse from previous family members. He tosses towards me and I’m nearly knocked off my feet when I barely caught it. “You forgot it in DADA yesterday. I guess we’re both forgetful.” 

The group is more than confused at Flint’s behavior; why isn’t he throwing punches or taunting Percy and Oliver? Why isn’t he going out of his way to make Percy’s life harder?

It’s…confusing.

Flint turns on his heel and is gone without another word.

“What the bloody hell just happened, Perce?”

“We’d all like to know.”

“I don’t even know, Oli.”

“Damn.”

That’s not even all that happened today either. 

The nervousness is still there, simmering under the surface.

I still had to see her, but I kept my head down and ignored every look she sent my way and rushed out of the room when class ended, with Oliver rushing to catch up. “Perce? You good man? You ran out of there like a bat outta hell.”

“Fine.” 

“No you’re not,” Ron growls under his breath, looking away from everyone else and glaring a hole into the carpet.

I don’t think that’s a lie, necessarily. I don’t say much more to him, nor to Penny and Audrey at dinner. I just don’t feel like talking.

‘Percy…I’m so sorry’ Charlie bites his lip to keep himself from letting out a sob of his own.

I ended up sneaking off to the library afterwards. I just need a few minutes alone. Just a couple.

The solitude didn’t last long.

The six of them are back to leaning forward in their seats, expecting the worst though hoping for the best.

“Weasley.” Quiet as a mouse for such a lumbering beast.

“Flint.” The twins say in unison.

“Flint.” I replied and kept my nose in my book. I didn’t need a beating on top of everything else today. 

A few growls, mainly from the twins and Bill.

Maybe someone up above will finally show me a little mercy. “What do you want? I’m too tired to deal with this today.”

“Woof, he can be surprisingly sassy.” Ginny chuckles quietly and turns the page.

I see him clench his fists 

Percy’s brothers did the same.

and unintentionally flinch back when he yanks a seat out from my table and drops into it. “To…talk.” 

Fred and George blink at each other in surprise. That’s new; Flint was never known for his tact or communication abilities.

He’s gritting his teeth and glaring at the wooden grain of the table instead of at me.

Zero. Zero communication skills.

“So…talk?” We’re both awkward at talking with people, it seems. It’s gross knowing I have something in common with Marcus Flint.

“Are you okay?” It’s a blunt, out of the blue question that threw me for a loop.

As it did for the rest of the Weasley broad.

“I don’t know what I was expecting, but it wasn’t that.” Charlie remarks with a quiet laugh.

“Nor did we.” Fred stretches his leg out to nudge George with his signature mischievous grin.

“What?” I must have looked like an idiot with my mouth hanging open in shock.

“Are you okay?” Flint repeated, voice tight and annoyed. “I…” He took a deep, shuddering breath, reigning in the urge to use his fists I assume. 

Bill grunts. “He better keep resisting.”

“I saw….saw what happened yesterday. Most of it, at least…”

“Fuck.” Ron swears. “Percy’s not gonna react well to that.”

Cold. That’s all I felt at the moment. The same feeling when he interrupted that woman and I. Freezing, numbing cold that circled through my veins and somehow into my lungs. I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t speak…couldn’t move.

“Shit, he’s gonna have a panic attack.” Charlie starts to bite at his nails, an old habit from when he was younger.

Terror, fear and shame coursed through me like a tidal wave before freezing in place as well.

“Weasley? Weasley, you hear me? Percy?”

“He…he used Percy’s name…”

I swallowed and brought my eyes up to meet Flint’s. I don’t know what he saw in mine, but I saw what almost looked like concern in his.

“Percy’s got to be confused,” George protested. “Flint doesn’t care about anyone but himself.”

Concern mixed with rage.

“There’s the anger.”

“You’re angry,” was the only pathetic thing I could get past my stiff, unmoving lips.

“Real tactful, Perce. Real observer you are.”

“Ron!”

“What?!”

Flint splutters about, face shifting into confusion again before turning back to rage. “I-I am angry! Furious even!” 

“He better not touch Percy.” Bill’s eyes are locked onto the book, rage building with every word.

He tosses his arms in the hair and I jerk back as Madam Pince makes a loud ‘harumphing’ noise in warning. 

‘Thank you, Madam Pince,' Ron thinks to himself; she may have just saved Percy from being on the receiving end of Flint’s notorious anger issues.

Flint lowered his voice to a more respectable level and met my eyes with his own. “I am so bloody angry, but not at you, idiot.”

That’s…more than surprising. Ginny hums in thought. “This is something…”

He’s angry, but not at me.

I don’t know how I feel about that.

“I-” I hate this. “I don’t wanna talk about it.”

“He might feel better if he does.” Charlie’s not talking to anyone in particular or maybe he is; they don’t know.

Flint nods like he expected that answer. “Okay,” he whispers. “Okay, you don’t have to. 

Fred and George share yet another look. Flint’s being surprisingly careful with his words; careful and gentle about how he’s talking to Percy. They don’t know much about Flint’s personal or home life, but it seems there’s more to him than meets the eye.

They still hate him, of course. He doesn’t deserve forgiveness.

Especially not to me. I understand that I’m the last person you’d want to talk about this with. Though, you should tell someone. It’s not right, she’s…she’s disgusting.”

“Even that bastard sees how wrong this is, why won’t Percy say anything?” Ginny sniffles but manages to keep the tears at bay, even if only by a thread.

“And I hate to say it,” Ron groans. “But Flint’s right, Percy should have told someone.”

She really is, isn’t she?

Yes.

I bite my lip and tap my fingers against the table. “I don’t know…I don’t want anyone to know.”

‘Percy,’ Ginny rubs her eyes in pure annoyance at the tears still threatening to fall.

He nods like he expected that as well. “Listen Weasel…” 

The entire lot of them groans at the nickname. They’ve all been subjected to being called Weasel at one point or another in their lives.

He rubs the back of his neck. “I’m not some ‘nice guy’, not by a long shot. 

That’s putting it mildly.

I’ll stop the…” He gestures between the two of us. “...physicalities, 

Bill squeezes his fists harder and bites his tongue to keep from saying anything.

but I won’t make your life a cake walk, dude. It’s not in my nature. 

“Anyone could have said that,” George murmurs.

I won’t apologize, but I won’t go out of my way to make you miserable as much. You got enough to fucking deal with, it looks like.”

“He’s such a dick, but not a monster.” Ginny tilts her head, frowning in thought. “He still deserves to get his ass kicked for what he put Percy through, though.” Her brothers each nod in agreement.

I swallow and scratch my nail against the worn wood. Do I trust Marcus Flint? 

Of course Percy didn’t.

Not as far as I can throw him. Do I believe that he won’t attack me anymore? Only time will tell, I guess. 

He better not.

I’m pensieve about all this but only one question flooded my mind at that moment, though.

“You won’t…tell anyone, right?”

“P-Perce…” Fred blinks away the tears and takes a shuddering breath.

Flint looks like he’s seriously contemplating it, then shakes his head once. “Nah, it’s not my bizz to tell, but she’s gross and it’s wrong and you don’t deserve that…No one deserves that…” 

“He’s got some morals, at least; as surprising as it is.” George lays his head back against one of the cushions, closing his eyes to think.

He looks away and his eyes glaze over like he’s deep in thought.

I started shoving my books into my schoolbag. “Why do you care, anyways?”

“Good question.”

His look turns to agitation. “I don’t, it’s just real fucking wrong of her. This doesn’t make us friends, I hope you know.”

Ron blows out a gust of air. “Of course it doesn’t, he’s still such a bloody wanker.”

I couldn’t help but smile. 

Okay. That’s real fucking odd.

“Wouldn’t dream of it, Firestarter.” 

Ginny’s eyes widen. “Firestarter? Oh, this feels like a real life enemies to friends to lovers story. What if–”

“NO!” Her brothers chorus and Ginny pouts in response.

He matches my grin and shoves his chair backwards, lumbering to his feet and turning to leave. This would probably be the first and last time Marcus Flint and I would have a civil conversation (as well as the first and last time I’ll see him in the library most likely).

The twins (and Ron) start snickering.

I accept his unspoken apology (even though he said he won’t apologize), but I don’t forgive him.

“Good, don’t.”

I doubt I ever will.

10th January, 1988

I had a dream. A very, very odd dream; but not entirely unpleasant.

I was sitting in DADA class with that woman in front of me. 

Ginny stares down at the letters, praying it’s not going to be as nightmarish as she thinks.

Fear gnawed at me and my hands had grown clammy with sweat.

It was terrible.

As all nightmares are.

The class was slow like molasses. Everything syrupy and thick and not really there.

Oliver is rambling to my left but I couldn’t make out a word he was saying. The classroom doors burst open, Professor McGonagall was there with Professor Flitwick and Sprout behind her. 

Bill leans forward, a confused look on his face.

I heard no words they exchanged with that woman, but she was being escorted out by the three.

Not a nightmare then, a dream. A sad dream of hoping someone would save him.

She threw me an odd little look over her shoulder before the doors were slamming shut and time froze.

I woke up with a pounding headache and a sense of disquiet.

Ron spoke up quietly. “That really is an odd dream. Wonder what it meant?”

“Probably nothing.” Charlie replies with a deep frown, his usual joyous grin completely dissipated.

14th January, 1988

Marcus Flint is more of an enigma than I originally thought. He hasn’t laid a hand on me since our chat in the library, 

“Surprising, surprising.” George nods along as Ginny reads. “Still gonna kick his ass though.”

but he’s still just as terrifying and cruel as ever. He spits venom like a snake only to twist his knife between your ribs.

“Definitely gonna kick his ass.”

Figuratively, at least.

He’s not as bad toward me anymore as he is with others, but still a nightmare to deal with.

Of course Flint couldn’t go too easy on poor Perce.

But sometimes (like today for instance), we’ll catch each other’s eyes across the great hall 

Bill narrows his eyes.

and he’ll give me an amused smirk and gesture by tilting his head towards whichever friend I’m with (today it was Oliver). Oliver was rambling like always, and it seemed to amuse Flint with how exasperated I must have looked.

“Ah yes, Percy’s annoyance amuses the bully. Of course.” Ron rolls his eyes and grumbles.

“But guys.”

“No enemies to lovers Gin, it’s not bloody happening!”

An enigma, like I said. Maybe he has some form of bipolar disorder, 

A few of the siblings try to stifle their giggling.

though I don’t know him well enough to speculate anymore on that.

He’s still a massive arse in the end, regardless.

Fred winks at George and then Charlie and Bill. “That he is.”

15th January, 1988

I’m tired.

Ginny frowns and turns the page, but that’s all Percy had written for that day. Odd (and terrifying to boot).

19th January, 1988

McGonagall held me after class today to ask if I was alright. I’m not, but I didn’t tell her that.

“Damnit, Percy.”

I smiled and nodded, then proceeded to ask about our current essay. Smile and nod, diffuse and ignore. Easy, easy. So bloody easy, it hurts…

Fred gasps quietly. “He’s had so much practice, he’s so good at this that we never noticed. Bloody hell, we’re awful.”

21th January, 1988

Oliver is losing his mind and it’s quite funny. He can’t seem to find his other shoe and he wants to watch the Gryffindor quidditch team’s practice.

I’m hiding his shoe under my bed and enjoying the chaos.

Charlie smiles fondly. His little brother teasing his friend. It’s something he’s missed seeing as they grew further and further apart over the years.

22th January, 1988

Friday, I’ve never been so relieved to not have school for two whole days. 

“Call the press,” George grins, but it’s a weak one lacking any real enthusiasm.

I’m burnt out and exhausted to the point that every little thing makes me feel like crying.

He’s not the only one. Ginny is fighting back tears again, along with Fred and Charlie.

Two whole days where I can hide in my room and not see her. She had an open box of pumpkin pasties on her desk during class and I felt sick.

Bill hisses as he feels his nails finally break skin, slowly unclenching his fists and seeing small pinpricks of blood. Whatever. He’ll deal with it later.

27th January, 1988

Oliver, along with our other dorm mates – Sebastian, Lucky, and Esteban – are all partaking in a game involving Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Beans where they would eat one, but have to maintain a straight face even if it’s the absolute worst thing to exist. The others have to try and guess the flavor.

It’s making me laugh. It feels really good to laugh.

It’s silent as Ginny closes the diary, face blank and tear-stained while she takes deep, calming breaths.

“Bloody hell, Percy.” Ron stands, running a hand through his hair and pacing back and forth across the living room. The others don’t really say anything; but to be honest what can they even say?

The world is full of terrible, awful people and now Percy’s hurt…so terribly hurt and far more than any of them ever realized.

Chapter Text

It’s Bill’s turn again, but he can’t help but dread it as Ginny brings him the book. It settles heavy in his hand while she returns to her seat. The cover is the same, the writing is the same; but he can never look at Percy the same after this and he hopes that someday their brother might forgive them for this invasion of his privacy.

Right now it’s best to get through the next month.

1st February, 1988

Father’s birthday is Saturday and I’m a little flummoxed on what to get him. 

Their dad could be a bit puzzling to shop for, though he does love whatever they gift him.

Perhaps something muggle? 

Always a good choice.

I’m sure he’d love that. He’s been going on and on about rubber ducks since the middle of summer.

The group of siblings cringe at the mention of their father’s odd rubber duck fixation.

On a side note, the horrid winter weather is starting to let up just a tad bit. At least my teeth stop chattering on the way to class. For as prestigious as Hogwarts is, you’d think they’d use a few heating charms in the high-ceiling, stone corridors.

“No kidding,” Ron mumbles.

It’s ridiculous how icy cold it gets.

2nd February, 1988

I’m tired, so very tired. Everyday it gets worse.

‘Percy, it’ll be okay,’ Bill thinks to himself.

It’s so bloody hard to fight these feelings back. Plenty of people have lives worse off than me, so why am I so bloody miserable most of the time?

George scoffs. “He…he shouldn’t try and minimize his own suffering.”

It’s ridiculous and depressing and I just…I don’t even know what I want. Maybe sleep to start.

Yes. Sleep sounds good.

Charlie rubs the back of his neck with a sigh. “That’s how bad coping skills can start. Hiding away and avoiding people…It’s not good for him.”

“No…no it’s not;” Bill hunches his shoulders, bringing the book closer to his eyes.

3rd February, 1988

I skipped breakfast and hid underneath a large tree on the shore of the Great Lake to work on my essay for transfiguration, 

The twins make matching disgusted faces at the idea of doing schoolwork so early in the morning.

but as luck would not have it I got interrupted.

“Working Weasel? 

Ron groaned the loudest amongst his siblings.

It’s too early for that.” 
 
“See! He gets it!”

My eye twitched and I turned to glare at none other than Marcus Flint. He was standing above me, smirking and towering over me. 

Bill’s fists clench once more, hopefully not smearing the dots of dried blood across the cover.

I must’ve flinched on instinct because he took a step back before dropping down into the grass to sit beside me. “What are ya working on?”

Fred’s brows furrow and he looks toward George with a perplexed look. “I can’t ever recall not seeing Flint snearing or snarling at people. He’s actually being…civil. For once.”

“Even freaks are human.”

He seemed to be trying to strike up a conversation, but I have no idea why. Flint’s not known to be a big talker.

“Again, putting it mildly.”

“Transfiguration essay. Fun, right?” I smiled faintly, setting my books and parchment on the ground beside me.

“Loads.” He returns my smile, albeit more amused than mine.

“Gack!” George throws his hands in the air. “This is just too weird! Marcus Flint of all people being civil and chatting with our Percy!”

Fred tosses a pillow at his brother, hitting him square in the face and eliciting an impromptu wrestling match between the two. It just so happens to take both Charlie and Bill to separate them.

We sat there in silence for a good while until breakfast was no doubt over and classes would be starting soon. As odd as it was, it wasn’t awkward in any way; more like a companionable silence.

“I hate this. I really do.”

“George!”

I still can’t stand him, though.

“Good.”

“Classes will be soon,” I muttered quietly. Flint nodded and I gathered my things as we stood.

“You have Shrew again today, don’t you?”

Ginny hits her head against the loveseat cushion. “He just had to bring that awful woman up, didn’t he?”

The question came out of the blue and I couldn’t help but flinch. Flint seemed at least a tiny bit apologetic, at the very least.

“I doubt that,” George huffs under his breath.

“Yeah…Yeah I do.”

Flint hefted his school bag over his shoulder and bounced on the heels of his feet. “Well, if she does anything…you can talk. To me? If you want? Vent or something. You should still tell a teacher or something, but I won’t force ya.”

Bill can clearly see how much disdain George holds toward Marcus Flint and while Bill himself is no fan of the man after how he treated his baby brother…Flint seems to be trying in his awkward way to be there for Percy.

It’s…not terrible.

He’s a bigger enigma than I originally had thought.

I swallowed and nodded. “O-Okay, yeah. I’ll…talk to you later then….Firestarter.” He flashed me a grin that was all teeth and that was that; we went our separate ways – me to Potions and him to wherever.

“I still hate the dude.”

5th February, 1988

She hasn’t done anything lately, 

Thank Merlin.

perhaps too worried about being caught again. I’m glad, but terrified every second I’m around her. The weekend is here though and I have a mountain of schoolwork to distract myself with as Oliver chatters away in my ear.

Bill takes a moment to calm himself before turning to the next page, eyes locking in on the words even as his blood boils.

6th February, 1988

It’s father’s birthday and it took me longer than I would have liked to find his gift. 

Fred rolls his eyes good-naturedly. “Dad’s the easiest to buy things for! Anything muggle and he’s a happy man.”

I did eventually find the perfect gift for him in the end, though I had to recruit Penelope’s help and now I’m stuck writing her Potions essay.

George and Fred mimic each other’s groans. “We could’ve done favors for the git and he would’ve done our school work?! Bagh!” George had tossed his arms in the air, huffing and slouching until he’s laid across the floor completely. “So uncool, Perce-”

“Shuddup already! Wankers!”

“Sheesh, Ronniekins…”

She wrote her parents and managed to get the gift for me – a set of muggle rubber ducks, 

“We should have called that.”

all dressed up in various little outfits. One was supposed to be a night, another a king, and the third some type of dragon.

Charlie’s ears perk up, he remembers that particular trio of ducks. Probably his favorites in their fathers collection.

I kept it a secret from Charlie, 

Traitor.

or else I would have lost one of the ducks before I could gift them to father. 

Bill shoots Charlie a slightly judging look as he has the nerve to pout over ducks that had been gifted over a decade ago.

“Charles.”

“I’m allowed to sulk, William.”

Though, I’m sure the second we’re home for our next holiday, he’ll spot it and steal it and I’m sure father will let him.

That was a lie. Father had absolutely forbidden him from touching the ducks, even whacked him round the head with his newspaper.

I sent the gift off to father with a letter and I’ll be waiting the rest of the night for his enthusiastic response.

7th February, 1988

Lazy Sunday!

Ron leans closer to Ginny to mumble under his breath. “I’ve never known Percy to enjoy a ‘lazy Sunday’.”

“Me neither,” she whispers back.

It’s the first nice day we’ve had in a while. The cold and snow are still there, but the sun is shining bright and the sky is blue as can be. Even now, I’m writing in the middle of the day while we lounge around the tree I sort of claimed by the lake – Oliver, Audrey, Penelope, and I.

“Perfect Percy is more human than we gave him credit for.”

The girls are sitting with their legs thrown over each other, munching away on the food Penelope and Oliver had carried out of the Great Hall hidden in their robes.

Charlie sent a small shock out of the tip of his wand, aiming it at the twins to prevent them from going on a tirade about ‘Perfect Percy, hanging around all those delinquents’.

They both made loud yelping noises – George rubbing his arm and Fred rubbing his foot.

Oliver, on the other hand, is reading the Daily Prophet’s quidditch section 

“Good to see his morning routine was always the same.”

and occasionally shoving the papers in my face to show me what’s going on in the quidditch circuit as of late.

I started munching away on one of the strawberries, but Penelope stole the last of them to give Audrey. They’re her favorite.

I caught sight of Flint 

“Blegh!”

“George,” Ginny rolled her eyes in exasperation. “You’ve got to stop interrupting every time Percy mentions Marcus Flint. Not even Fred is being this obnoxious.”

“Hey!” Fred pouts while his brother narrows his eyes at Ginny.

“Gins-”

“Nope, shut it and listen.”

not too long ago, he grinned and made a crude gesture; although it seemed all in jest.

“Smooth, mannerly Flint.”

Lazy sunday to the fullest.

8th February, 1988

Today could have gone better, 

“Damn it, Perce,” Ron bemoans. “Can’t you go a week or two with nothing happening? For Merlin’s sake…”

I ended up in the hospital wing due to an unfortunate incident that happened in Herbology. Some of those plants are right terrors.

Charlie and Bill winced, glancing at each other. “You remember too?”

“Yep.”

I just injured my hand is all, but it was bleeding a good bit and Audrey hadn’t stopped crying the entire way to the infirmary as she escorted me. Even when I tried to reassure her it looked worse than it was, she still kept crying and apologizing.

Oliver wanted to bring me, 

“Of course he did,” the twins snickered amongst themselves.

but Sprout wouldn’t let him for whatever reason. I was excused from the rest of my classes for today as the healing Madam Pomfrey did left me near exhausted.

It’s a blessing in disguise as I wouldn’t have to go to DADA.

Ginny is the one to let out a tirade of swears, cursing the former DADA teacher in her surprisingly vast and vulgar vocabulary.

“Ginny!” Bill finally bellowed. “Enough, girl. What would mum think of that mouth of yours?”

“She’d be right on my side if she and dad were here.” Their sister crossed her arms, leveled Bill with an annoyed and slightly angered glare before sticking her nose up in the air as she ceasing her display.

Bill, along with their brothers, eyed Ginny warily before he continued on from where he was interrupted.

The second classes were out for lunch, Oliver was up in our dormitory, balancing food and drinks for the two of us with a big, goofy grin on his face.

“How’s your hand?”

“Not bleeding over the floor anymore, at least.” That got a smile out of Oliver and I was happy to ease his nervousness.

“He’s a bloody people pleaser to the extreme,” Ron huffs. “He’s been injured and he’s worried about Oliver Wood’s moods over his own self. Idiot.”

Bill and Charlie share a look – both smiling in that sad, understanding way of theirs that confuses the younger three.

“Percy’s always been like that, more than you guys know.” Charlie plucks at the loose thread at the hem of his shirt, refusing to elaborate further.

12th February, 1988

Valentines’ Day is on Sunday and you can feel it ‘in the air’ as Penny would say. The older students are being caught snogging left and right and I’ve unfortunately walked in on Bill and Rosa in an empty classroom when I was looking for new places to study.

A faint blush crosses Bill’s face as he struggles to avoid the knowing gazes of each sibling. He can’t hide from their crowing and jeering though.

I don’t really know what they were doing, 

“Thank Merlin for that.”

but Rosa was giggling and Bill had his shirt off – 

Bill jabs Charlie in the ribs before the other even has a chance to make a comment and, thankfully, his brother’s wheezing seems to have dissuaded any of the others from saying anything more.

both failed to notice me as they were too engrossed in each other; 

Ginny and Fred both made matching disgusted faces.

I carefully extracted myself from the room. Though I did let the door slam behind myself to give them a fright.

“Hah!”

“George!”

If only I knew a charm to sanitize my eyes.

On a different note, though, Penny’s been on a pink and red tirade – she’s been insisting on clipping heart shaped pins to our robes 

Charlie’s head jerks up, a coy knowing grin spreads across his face as he recalls exactly what Valentines’ Percy is talking about.

and I’ve managed to avoid it so far, but I can feel her hunting me down and I don’t know how long I have before I’m taken prisoner.

“Wittle Percy is so dramatic,” Fred guffaws. “Right Georgie?”

George grins and nods along. “Almost as bad as Ronniekins!”

“Oi! Why bring me into this? I didn’t even do anything!”

14th February, 1988

It happened. Valentines’ Day is a curse. 

Charlie leans over to try and read over Bill’s shoulder, but in his eagerness he falls into his brother and Bill tosses him back to his side of the couch.

“Watch it! No backseat reading!”

Charlie pouts, sticking his tongue out like an actual child.

Penelope spent the past two days hunting me as I avoided her outside of class and escaped at the end of them before she could get to me. It’s been a game in our group; Penny hunting us and pinning her hearts to our robes to declare victory.

Ron shakes his head in amusement, laughing along with the twins. “He wasn’t being dramatic, she’s actually hunting them.”

Audrey was first to lose, though I suspect she let Penny win and might even be in on it with her. 

Poor Oliver though. 

The twins grinned.

I watched from a window as they caught him in the courtyard as he was returning from watching Gryffindor’s quidditch practice. Penny jumped on his back to make his knees buckle underneath him and Audrey jumped in from her hiding place to help Penelope turn Oliver onto his back where she held him still so Penny could pin her obnoxiously loud, bright heart-shaped pin to his robes.

Fred and George could only hold out for so long before their laughter filled the burrow, sounding loud enough that Bill thought they might have woken the attic’s ghoul.

“Wish we-” George starts as he wipes a tear from his eye.

“-could have-” Fred continues, slapping the ground with the palm of his hand.

“That!” They finish off together and it takes a good few, long minutes before they calm enough to let Bill continue.

It was admittedly hilarious to watch, but I knew then that my time was numbered and I wasn’t keen on being caught after I saw Oliver not too much later with his pin SINGING of all things. 

The twins' laughter grew horrendously loud again and it took both Ron and Ginny pelting them with the loveseat pillows before they stopped.

It was singing a loud, embarrassing love ballad that made people giggle and laugh.

Oliver still wore it with pride, no doubt not wanting to hurt the girls’ feelings. 

Charlie chuckles, as he recalls just how sweet young Oliver Wood was.

“They’re looking for you too, Perce.” Oliver grinned as he slung his arm over my shoulder. 

“Uh oh,” Ron murmurs. “Why do I feel like he’s up to something…” Charlie just grins at the lot of them.

I rolled my eyes in response, but smiled all the same.

“They’ll have to catch me first,” I replied.

“Don’t say that, Perce!”

“Well…you better start running!” 

“Merlin,” Ron throws his hands into the air with a swear on his tongue. “I knew it! That’s betrayal!”

I felt Oliver’s arm move first, but years with five brothers had me prepared for this overall basic move. 

The boys (and even Ginny) each nod solemnly before speaking in harmony all at once. “Headlock.”

I ducked out of the way just in time to avoid the inevitable headlock Oli was going for.

“Truly basic.” Fred shakes his head in disappointment, but George only shrugs.

“Well, Oliver is an only child. He’s never had to experience such a thing as sibling rough housing.”

I tripped forward, caught myself on the wall and looked back at Oliver in mock betrayal. “Traitor!” 

Ron nodded along.

I laughed and started running. I could hear Oliver and eventually Penny and Audrey shouting after me as they tried to chase after me.

“They should have tried harder to trap him.”

My legs are longer than most my age and I’m pretty fast if I do say so myself. All it took was for me to take one quick turn and then another and I’ve lost them.

“Whoo!” Ron cheers, pumping his fist into the air. “Can’t let the traitors win, Perce!”

Classes had ended for the day so I had to work hard to avoid the three if I wanted to win our little unorthodox game. 

Bill shakes his head in amusement, smiling faintly. “Unorthodox is an understatement.”

They’ve come close to catching me quite a few times after that, but I’ve always just barely managed to give them the slip.

Ron was still steadily cheering his brother on.

It was nearing dinner time and I could feel them closing in. I was talking with Charlie in the courtyard as he continued rambling about his latest Care of Magical Creatures class with the biggest grin on his face when I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end.

Charlie started leaning toward Bill again, grin turning mischievous as the others stared at him with suspicion.

“Charlie,” Ron says slowly. “What’d you do?”

“Percy!” A loud, shrill voice shouted and I darted to hide behind Charlie as he made a loud ‘oomph’ noise after what I can only assume was Penny ramming into his stomach in an attempt to tackle me.

“Another basic move!” The twins shake their heads once more in disappointment.

I couldn’t help but laugh as Penny and Charlie both groaned in tandem; Charlie holding his stomach and Penny rubbing her forehead. I peaked around Charlie, smirking at my friend as she glared with a look of pure determination on her face.

Ron was on the edge of his seat, nearly falling onto the floor.

Charlie was still groaning as she jumped to her feet and proceeded to chase me all over the courtyard, waving one of those awful singing heart pins in the air as she ran. Students were watching us and I even caught sight of Professor Flitwick turning away and pretending he couldn’t see a thing. His quiet laughter couldn’t fool me though.

Ginny chuckles along as she recalls just how much Flitwick let students get away with. As long as no one was hurt, of course.

I nearly managed to run into one of the adjoining corridors but had to turn last minute as Audrey blocked my path. People were dodging our little rampage, laughing; Gryffindors were cheering either me or Penelope on.

“Traitors,” Ron shouts. “Every single one of them that are cheering for her! Where's the house loyalty?!”

Oliver, of course, came out of the woodwork as well and nearly tackled me into the fountain; though he only managed to soak himself (he should work on his aim if he wants to join the quidditch team next year).

Fred and George’s laughter starts up again, though at a much more tolerable level that didn’t disrupt Bill’s reading.

Sadly, like all good things, it had to come to an end in the worst way possible.

Betrayal.

“No!”

“Ron, it’s not that serious.”

“Of course it is, Gins!”

As I was about to jump over a bench and make my escape into the nearest corridor, an arm caught me around the waist and lifted me off the ground. I began to flail and Charlie started laughing behind me.

Bill paused his reading to wait out the eventual outburst. And, as he expected, he didn’t need to wait long.

Ron had grabbed one of the pillows he and Ginny had pelted the twins with and used magic to have it continuously beat Charlie over the head with.

“R-ack! Ron! Stop it!” Charlie covers his head, attempting to dodge the unrelenting pillow. “It was years ago!”

“You still betrayed our brother!”

“It was a game!” The scene plays out for a good while before Bill waves his wand to counterspell Ron’s.

“Enough, I’d like to continue.”

Ron only crossed his arms, glaring at the second eldest as he rubbed his head.

“I caught him!” Charlie had me pinned and no matter the amount of fighting I did….I was absolutely stuck. The utter betrayal!

Ron nearly raises his wand again, but Ginny pushes his arm back down.

Penelope had a giddy grin on her face as she came closer, sticking the pin to my robes and crowing in victory as it sang its unholy, gaudy tune. I grimace but slump in defeat until Charlie finally puts me down.

“That was actually so adorable.” Ginny laughs quietly.

I was sulking with crossed arms all while Penelope was giggling in front of me as Audrey and Oliver (still soaked to the bone and dripping everywhere) soon joined us. Charlie ruffled my hair, his own laughter stifled from behind his hand. “Traitor,” I mumbled with a loud (and slightly over exaggerated) huff.

“Traitor,” Ron, Fred, and George all repeat.

“Yeah, yeah.” Charlie snickers and nudges me.

“You’re all awful.” Penelope and Oliver pout at me though Audry just has a small smile on her face. “Terrible friends and brother, the entire lot of you.”

All four of our pins were singing together, completely out of sync but still somehow amusing.

Penny leans close, taps the tip of my nose and grins her wide, manic smile. “I win.” I was hoping at the time that the cool air disguised the red blush on my cheeks.

“Awe!”

“Ginny, no!”

17th February, 1988

Three days. Three bloody days until that pin stopped its singing. 

Half of them grimaced at the thought of having to endure such a thing for days on end.

It was cute at first, especially since it made Penny so happy to ‘win’ (if it could be counted as such with Charlie’s unfortunate intervention).

Ron met his brother’s amused grin with a glare.

But now? I want to curse whoever came up with such a thing as singing pins. Though, knowing Penny, she probably made the pin herself with some charm she found and even if I begged her, she wouldn’t budge and tell me how to get rid of the pin’s singing.

“Oh, I like her, Fred.”

“As do I, George!”

This morning, after yet another sleepless night, they finally stopped their confounded noise.

Oliver, on the other hand, didn’t seem bothered in the slightest.

I’ll get them back eventually.

Charlie tilts his head, hand rubbing his chin. “I wonder if he ever did.”

20th February, 1988

The week was long and exhausting so I was actually looking forward to the weekend this time. 

Of course the twins made exaggerated gasps of surprise with their hands on their chests.

The sun was actually shining and the weather wasn’t too cold so I could get away with wearing just a warm vest over my shirt.

Another Quidditch game, 

Various, annoying whoops as well.

another day of the hustle and bustle of excited students rushing each other so their friend groups can grab the best seats. It’s Slytherin vs. Ravenclaw and Penelope is being nearly as insufferable as Oliver. They’re both menaces to society.

Fred huffs. “If they’re menaces then what are we! He’s never called us menaces to society!”

George nods along. “Right-o! We’ll just have to try harder!”

“Please, don’t.” Bill groans but can only shake his head in defeat when the twins look at him with matching, devilish grins.

All I wanted to do was spend the day studying, maybe catch up on some reading in the hours where everyone would be down at the pitch; but NOPE. 

“Of course not. His roommate is a quidditch addict.”

According to Oliver, it’s Quidditch or nothing. Well, that’s what it sounds like he says as he quite literally dragged me out of the dorms. Gryffindor’s not even playing, yet Oliver still can’t miss a game. 

He just wanted to see Slytherin get their asses kicked.

“As do we all.”

I kinda did too.

“See!” Ron shouts. “Even Percy hates Slytherin!”

“He never actually said that-”

“Shuddup, Ginny.”

Sadly we were both disappointed, though Penelope was devastated the most that Slytherin beat her house, 180 - 10. Humiliating defeat.

Charlie and Bill both cringed as they remembered that particular game. It had taken forever for the Ravenclaw team to recover their reputation among their own housemates.

24th February, 1988

Four days after and Penelope is still sulking over Ravenclaw’s loss. 

Ron nods along as if this is a completely acceptable and reasonable reaction.

Her house had even gone so far as to boo the poor team at breakfast the morning after the game. That must’ve been even more humiliating.

The Weasley’s that had actually played on the quidditch team all grimaced in sympathy for Ravenclaw’s team as Bill just shakes his head at their dramatics.

What’s worse is the Slytherins were going out of their way to rub their win into the Ravenclaws’ faces.

The game had thrown everyone for a loop, making the day just a tad more bearable.

Bill swallows the lump in his throat, fingers shaking just slightly as he turns the page onto the next entry.

26th February, 1988

Oliver had gone to the Hospital Wing this morning when he woke up with some sort of stomach bug. Oh, as selfish as it is, I wish he had stayed with me.

They each took turns sighing and hanging their heads. An entry like that never seems to bode well for poor Percy.

I had to endure DADA alone, even surrounded by my housemates….

The air seems to freeze, any previous light-heartedness or jovial atmosphere evaporates in an instant.

Seeing her in the front of the class, her eyes meeting mine too often to be coincidental….My own stomach felt like it was full of knots, the kind that leads to hurling.

Bill grips the book tighter, Charlie laying a calming hand on his brother’s shoulder - only it’s incapable of soothing the rage that’s been building within him since the very beginning. The type of rage he only feels when it gets closer to a full moon.

She made to call my name as class ended, 

They're all on the edge of their seats.

but by some miraculous chance the door stayed wide open after the others had all filed out; a single broad hand holding it open as dark eyes stared down the professor. 

Ginny lets out the air she’s been holding, silently thanking anyone listening for looking out for her brother that day.

She didn’t say anything, mouth closing as I looked nervously between her and my would be savior. My luck seemed to grow as I saw Marcus Flint standing there, eyes hard and cold.

George throws his hands in the air. “Of course it’s Flint! I don’t want to like him, but I’m feeling like I’m not going to get a choice here!

“Weasel.” He called, voice just as cold. “C’mon. Could use your help with something.” 

Ron shakes his head. “Is that all he could think up?”

It was a pathetic excuse, but I took the chance it gave me all the same and hurried from the class, ducking under Flint’s arm as I went. That’s twice he’s helped me now.

George grumbles to himself. He hates Flint more than anything, but seeing him help Percy at his most vulnerable? It’s softening the edges of that hatred

The door slams shut, Flint soon falling into step beside me. I don’t say anything and he doesn’t pry.

That’s one thing I actually really like about Marcus Flint.

Bill breathes deeply, closing the book and setting it in his lap. Fred is mumbling quietly with Ron and Ginny while George has gone quiet, stewing in his own thoughts.

“Bills?” Charlie grips his shoulder, squeezing gently. “You good?” That rage, that primal…bestial rage….

He’s never wanted to tear someone apart as badly as Gila Shrew.

It takes willpower to push down as he swallows in an attempt to wet his suddenly dry throat.

“Yeah…yeah, I’m good, Charlie.” He places the diary in his brother’s hands. “I’m good.”

Chapter Text

The book, just like before, felt heavy in his hand. Just looking at the journal’s charming cover you would have never guessed it hid such sadness and horror within.

‘Just like Percy,’ Charlie stares at the cover, running a finger along his brother’s name. No one rushes him, no one looks at him.

They understand what he’s feeling far too well.

Charlie can only flip the book open once more to where they had left off.

1st March, 1988

Ron’s turning eight today. 

Ron perks up at the mention of his name.

It’s his first birthday that I’ll actually miss. Thankfully, next month, I won’t miss the twins’ at least.

The three mentioned siblings all share a look, none of them interrupting their older brother but still somehow managing to have a full conversation with their eyes alone.

It’s not as easy as I thought. I won’t get to see his face when he blows out the candles or opens the meager presents our parents put together…. I’ll miss out on that for at least a few years.

I don’t know why that upsets me so much.

“I…” Charlie sighs and rubs the back of his neck. He and Bill both recall just how many of their brothers’ and sister’s birthdays they had missed, even after leaving Hogwarts to start their own lives.

Charlie can’t even remember the last time he came home just to celebrate someone’s birthday.

Ron, on the other hand, just furrows his brow in confusion. Had Percy really cared that much?

5th March, 1988

The weather is starting to take a turn for the better finally, a peek of bright colors here and there as the last of any remaining snow melts away. Enough warmth to get away with studying out in one of the courtyards without a heavy sweater or scarf, but still a tad too nippy to roll up your sleeves.

“Oddly descriptive,” Ron murmurs to Ginny, who whaps him across the back of his head.

Spring’s coming closer as does the end of my First Year. Others have begun studying religiously for our final exams that are approaching far faster than any would like. 

The twins’ nearly start a booing tirade, but Bill’s tired look keeps them in line. For the moment, that is.

I can’t judge, though. Between Penelope and I, we’ve been driving poor Oli insane by having him quiz us.

It’s almost like a fun little competition between us.

“Definitely not fun for 'poor Oli'.”

I’m winning.

Charlie snorts a laugh, rolling his eyes quite fondly.

8th March, 1988

Her classes have kept me on edge, nerves fraying as my stomach grows queasy each and every time I enter Her classroom. 

Ginny latches onto her nearest brother, which just so happens to be Ron, digging her nails into his arm to center herself; though her older brother doesn’t seem to even acknowledge the tiny pin pricks of pain as his own eyes stay locked forward to never leave the journal in Charlie’s hands.

The urge to flee grows stronger each time, but I cannot just avoid DADA forever. No matter how much I want to.

Ginny’s sniffling starts up again.

Oliver kept asking me what’s wrong. His eyes darted between me and Her during class. He’s too perceptive for his own good.

“A-At least tell Oliver!” George cries out, hands thrown in the air. “Or take Flint up on his offer! Talk to someone, damnit!”

I don’t want him to know. I don’t want anyone to know.

George growls and drags his knees to his chest, burying his face away so none could see his own tears threatening to fall.

It’s horrid enough that Marcus Flint of all people knows.

Speaking of Marcus Flint….

He’s been a little off lately from what I’ve noticed. I swear I’ve seen him a few times after leaving DADA, just hanging back in random corners and alcoves. 

Fred cautiously looks to his twin, crawling across the floor to take the spot next to him. He doesn’t say anything more, just wraps an arm around George to offer his silent comfort.

Most of the time just out of sight, but I can tell it’s him.

I just don’t know why.

Neither do any of them. It’s too out of character for Marcus Bloody Flint.

9th March, 1988

Mother and Father’s letters seem to grow concerned. 

Bill’s head practically snaps as he turns to look at Charlie, a small smidgen of hope growing in his chest. Hope that maybe Percy had told them. Had confided in someone…Even though he should know better by now…

I think I need to do better of putting on a front for others. I needn’t worry them with trivial things.

I want to scream.

So does Bill.

13th March, 1988

Sunday morning and once again the castle is in an uproar for the day’s quidditch match. Hufflepuff versus Gryffindor today.

I had managed to catch up to Charlie before the game this time (with Oliver hot on my heels, of course). 

“Of course.”

“Obviously.”

“Can’t talk to our quidditch star brother without him.”

“Quite.”

Bill rubs the bridge of his nose, glaring at Ron and Ginny surprisingly as they just shrugged back.

The twins seemed to be feeling much too somber to crack any jokes for the moment.

He seems as confident and easy-going as ever, ruffling my hair, much to my chagrin, before he’s rushing off to meet with the rest of the team.

Charlie chuckles, flipping to the next page.

Thankfully, Oliver’s too starstruck to make any jokes.

“Of-”

“Enough Ron!”

Ron seems to huff, sulking backward into his seat, matching Bill’s glare before looking away when it becomes too intimidating.

I follow him into the stands to catch up with Penelope and Audrey.

Audrey had never been into Quidditch as much as the others, but she’s still sporting a Hufflepuff pin to show her support for her own house. Penelope wears a matching pin and Oliver decides to act out his own ‘death from betrayal’. His own words.

Ron snickers, gently nudging George with his foot. “C’mon George, you gotta admit that’s a funny image.”

George looks up over his arms, eyes red around the edges but otherwise dry for now. He smiles faintly at Ron, nodding along. “Always so dramatic, just like-”

“Don’t you say me!”

“-you!”

The youngest son groans and slouches in his seat. “Merlin’s balls, I can’t with you.” Fred leans into George, laughing quieter than normal.

“He loves us, right Georgie?”

“Right-O, Freddy.”

I just smile at his dramatics and pull out my ear plugs. I note how the girls notice but neither say a word about them; for that, I’m grateful.

The match is much longer than the other matches I’ve been to. It must have been at least an hour before anyone’s made a score and even longer before the next one.

Bill laughs as he recollects that particular match. Rosa had been exhausted afterward and he had to practically carry Charlie to his own dormitory after the celebrations. The entire team and their reserves had been dead on their feet.

Charlie and the Hufflepuff seeker have been neck and neck the entire time. When one would see the snitch, the other would be right there until the little golden devil disappears once more.

Night had begun to fall and still no one had grabbed the snitch. 

Fred pipes up in an attempt to cheer his twin further. “Oi! You’re supposed to be a seeker, Charlie! Not a-” He didn’t get a chance to continue as his brother hit him square in the face with a couch pillow.

This got a genuine laugh from George at any rate.

Audrey was dozing off against Penelope despite how loud it must’ve been. A few times players had switched out with those on the reserve for a break, but not Charlie. He was still determined to find the snitch before Hufflepuff.

“That’s my brother!”

Charlie can only roll his eyes as he had no more pillows and Bill wouldn’t take kindly to him hexing their baby brother.

Dinner time had to have been closing in when FINALLY we saw both seekers nose dive. 

Ron and Ginny share a grin, whispering bets to one another on who they think is going to catch the snitch.

It’s close, far too close to the ground in fact. Their hands are both outstretched, but the ground is approaching rapidly.

“Oh relax,” Charlie huffs at the concerned faces around him. “This was over a decade ago and I’m very clearly fine!”

Hufflepuff’s seeker seems to have chickened out though as he yanks on his broom to pull out of the dive, but Charlie didn’t. 

“Cornwallis was always too scared of injury.” Bill and Charlie share a laugh, shaking their heads at the mere thought.

It’s another terrifying second before he’s pulling out of his own dive, fist clenched high in the air with the unmistakable rapid fluttering of wings sticking out between his fingers.

Final score: Gryffindor, 250 - 50

“Whoo!” Fred cheers, fistbumping Ron and patting George’s back. “Another win for the best house Hogwarts has to offer!”

The crowd jumps around us, Oliver shaking my shoulders. Audrey is roused and looks a tad glum but otherwise unbothered that her house had lost. 

“Good sport about it, hah!”

The Gryffindor team is doing a victory lap with Charlie in the lead while Betty and Rosa flank him with their bats raised in the air. I lean into Oliver, laughing at the clear joy on his face.

It’s been a good night.

Ginny glances downward, smiling to herself. “He’s found people that actually make him happy to be with. I’m just…so damn happy.” Ron hesitates before pulling Ginny into a hug, unsure if she was going to start crying or not.

17th March, 1988

Penelope had found me in one of my hiding places during our break, wedging herself in the small alcove with me. 

“She seems to be very good at hunting people down.”

I bookmarked the page I had been reading, matching her grin.

“Pens,” I had said.

“Perce,” she had replied.

I had laughed quietly, not wanting to draw anyone to our cozy little spot behind a tapestry. 

George huffs a laugh and looks over at Fred. “How is he so good at finding spots without the map?”

“It’s Percy! He’s always been too clever for his own good! And too skilled at hiding from us!”

How Penny had found me? I have no idea.

That’s a damn good question.

She shifts, shoving her schoolbag and mine aside to make more room. “Cozy little spot.”

“Very.”

“Lovely eloquent talks they have.”

That’s all, but that’s all we need. She pulls out one of her own books and I return to mine where we finish our break reading together in a comfortable silence.

21st March, 1988

The Easter Holidays are coming closer, just a few days away and you can tell the energy is in the air. Students are ecstatic to get a break without having to worry about their approaching finals while others are growing even more nervous.

It seemed only Oliver would be staying behind this time. 

“Wonder why,” Ron murmurs more to himself than to the others in the room.

I wanted to ask why. He stayed during both the winter and now the easter holidays and it made me realize just how little I knew about Oliver’s home life. 

“Terrible job at friendship Percy!”

Bill sighs and this time Fred is the victim of his infamous brotherly glare, only he matches it with an unaffected grin.

He knew enough about mine, mainly from seeing my brother’s around, but I knew next to nothing besides the fact he was an only child.

That’s something I need to resolve before the upcoming holidays.

“You better Perce!”

22nd March, 1988

I’ve been spending all day and evening bombarding Oliver with questions - what are his parents like? Are they also wizards? What do they do? Where’s he from? Etc. etc.

“Not like that, Perce… Too much at once.”

He’s been all too enthusiastic to answer each and every thing I asked. His mother died when he was young and his father works a lot. 

George and Fred look at one another, eyes wide in surprise. “I didn’t know his mum died,” George whispers to his twin. “Did you?”

“Not a clue, he never really talked about his ‘rents.”

They were both half-bloods from Stoke-On-Trent, though his father moved them to London after his mother died. He says it’s easier to stay at Hogwarts than spend more holidays alone.

The twins feel guilt clawing at their insides from all the times they had teased and mocked Oliver behind his back.

I feel sorry about his mother, but I know he wouldn’t want my pity as he even says so himself. It was so long ago, he barely remembers her. Although he keeps a photo of her in his trunk.

I give him a break and stop asking questions

George lays his head back in his arms. “Good chap, Perce…good chap.”

26th March, 1988

The train had been full of rambunctious and home-sick students leaving for the holidays. Plenty had been giving their friends overtly long goodbyes that would be best saved for when the school year ended.

Ginny averts her eyes, knowing just how dramatic her and Luna had been during their first goodbye over the holidays.

Even so, Oliver bid me and the ladies goodbye from the platform and I felt a pang of guilt at going back to my loving family while he remained here alone when the only family he had preferred to spend the holidays working instead of with him.

Fred tries to speak with George, but the other just grunts and shakes his arm off in an attempt to get his brother to leave him be.

Audrey and Penelope hugged Oliver and we boarded the train. They spent the better part of the ride talking about all the different things they’d be doing over the break even as I tried to recommend studying for finals.

Ron rolls his eyes and groans. “Always studying with him! It’s the holidays!”

“But their finals-”

“The holidays, Gin! Holidays!”

I got waved off for that, but it didn’t bother me much.

Bill found me just as the train was pulling into the station.

“Alright, Perce?” He grinned and raised a brow when he saw my friends but I just started pushing on his stomach to get him to hurry up and leave so we could go.

Bill covers his mouth to keep from laughing at the memory of an embarrassed younger Percy and his giggling friends.

He was laughing at me while grabbing my trunk. Bill glanced at Penny and Audrey, flicking his wand and mumbling a spell to levitate their trunks. “Let’s move on then! Mum’s awaiting!”

“Show off,” Charlie nudges him with a smirk.

I continue to push him along, the girls giggling behind us as we weave through the crowd.

Mum is just as clingy as before, latching onto me first before moving onto Bill and eventually Charlie when he joins us. I feel that familiar queasy feeling, but I force it down and bid my friends goodbye for now.

The mood tenses suddenly, none looking at each other.

It’ll be a long, but hopefully pleasant, holiday.

Charlie takes a moment to orient his thoughts, staring at the writing before him before setting the book aside. The second it closed, George was up and fleeing the room with Fred chasing after him. Ginny makes to follow but Ron holds her back. “Just…just let him go for now, George needs a moment is all.”

Charlie just hopes they're right as he and Bill exchange anxious glances.