Archive of Our Own ^beta

The woven, padded flooring of the training room creaked and crackled as the she padded across its surface amongst the weapon racks and training dummies. This place was special to her, a place to be alone from the rest of the world. Sometimes she felt guilty needing a place just to be apart when there were so many that still looked to her for guidance, still needed her to be some beacon of hope she had never wanted to be. But then she would return here and feel the serenity that came with being away from prying eyes. The calm that came with simply being for a alone for a few hours.

Sometimes she would train, use this abandoned room in an equally abandoned wing of the fort for its intended purpose. Sometimes she would meditate and just enjoy the silence for a while. Sometimes, however, when she was feeling particularly fragile, she would try to dance for herself once again. She knew the steps, could perform the movements, and she would even be able to feel that oneness with land that she had so cherished as a child. But she had never been able to truly feel it in her soul as she had once done before. Karma - or Darha, as she always insisted Irelia call her in private - once said when she had confided in her that she wasn’t the same little girl dancing beneath the swaying groves of shimmermist trees at the Placidium schools. That it was perfectly understandable that she change with the traumas she has faced. The whole of Ionia changed with the war, and to deny and ignore what happened would only lead to more pain.

But Irelia always had her doubts. Her dances weren’t stopped by would always be stopped by a growing feeling that froze her heart. It was the feeling of her ancestors looking down at her with shame and disgust when she tried to dance like she used to, tried to create beauty after she had been stained with death and murder. She could see her father’s disappointed face, Zelos’ silence as even he couldn’t make light of what she had done, see Kai, Ohn, and little Ru hide their faces in the folds of their O-ma’s dress, and her O-ma… Irelia could see how the sorrowful tears would run down her wrinkled face as she came to grips with what her little dancer had become.

Because of this, Irelia seldom danced here anymore.

Training would always at least be a relief, she thought to herself as she gave a light smack to a practice dummy’s head, sending it spinning around and around. It let her blow off some steam that built up after dealing with the disparate groups of petitioners, or meeting with feckless priests asking her to lend her support and speak out for more funding to rebuild some of the ancient monasteries. The war had been simpler she thought dryly. People were more willing to tolerate a few petty grievances in favor of a achieving a greater goal.

With a small sigh, she unloaded her blades from their case and laid them out before her. With a twist of her hand, she rearranged them back into her family’s seal for a moment before a sway of her wrist sent them into a lazy orbit around her. In front of her kneeling form were a series of dummies and wooden targets scattered about the room. Irelia centered herself and focused on her breathing for a moment. Smooth, even breaths as she began to focus on her blades. Irelia could feel them as though they were simply an extension of her own skin. She could feel the air against their surface and feel them twisting and turning around as much a part of her as her arms or legs. Magic flowed through her like a steady creek and washed over every inch of her body and she shivered as it passed into the cool metal.

Snapping her eyes open, Irelia struck out. A quick jab with her left arm sent blades flying, impaling themselves directly into the heads of several dummies and striking the center of several targets. She pushed herself forward into a roll and leaped toward a tight collection of wooden opponents. Irelia followed the steps of this dance as easily as she breathed, twisting around the obstacles in a flurry of spins and pirouettes. Her blades targeted the necks and major joints of the dummies, the long ends of her silk sleeves flowing through the air behind her as the sharpened metal cleaved through it all.

The now disembodied chunks collapsed onto the woven mats with a noisy clatter, but it didn’t distract her. All she could focus on was the movement, the dance as she continued to devastate her imagined opponents  One of her legs swung around in a flourishing battement and connected solidly against the back of another false body. Maybe a bit too extravagant if she were in a real battle, but she knew she didn’t care when she heard the satisfying sound as the material split and pieces of wooden flesh were sent careening across the training space, knocking down several of their comrades in arms.

Energized by her training, she sensed the flying shuriken from the shadows before she saw them. Her blades immediately contracted around her, blocking the deadly metal shards with piercing clangs. With a single glance, she recognized the shape of the deadly weapons. Irelia couldn’t help the grin that broke out on her face for it had been a some time since they had last done this and she was looking forward to a challenge.

The rafters were still dark above her as her eyes scanned for a sign of her new opponent. A cold laugh began to echo through the confines of the large dojo without nary a source. Many would have felt a shiver run up their spine, or felt their heart begin to race as the echoing sound reverberated around them. Irelia, however, couldn’t resist simply rolling her eyes at the display. Ever the dramatic one , she thought to herself fondly. Fear had its uses she supposed, her opponent’s Order had proven that well enough during the war as they sent even the most hardened of the Tryants’ warbands skittering amongst themselves like children listening to a ghost story. But to cause true terror required a certain inhumanity which was something that didn’t work when one had seen through the facade.

“As I recall it, showboating like this lost you at least three of our past engagements,” she called out to the seemingly empty room, “I thought you prided yourself on learning from your mistakes.” She knew that poking at her opponent’s self-confidence was the best way to get a response. He never could back down from a direct challenge. Never content to let sleeping Zhyuni gnarltooths lie, or let a slight go unanswered.

Irelia felt a smooth satisfaction at getting what she wanted as a set of glowing red eyes and a shifting, shadowy form melted from one of the thicker rafter bearings. As he stepped into the direct light, a thick rope around his waist was the first thing to be solidly visible along with several pouches no doubt carrying more tools and weapons to be used at a moment’s notice. The smoking shadows began to dissipate and more of him became visible. His black silk vest tucked into his equally black trousers and held together by the simple belted rope. Irelia wanted to roll her eyes again at the never-deviating monochromatic outfits of him and his fellow acolytes, but he would for sure take that as an opening to strike and she wasn’t about to give him an opening he didn’t deserve.

She noticed that his choice of primary weapon this time was a simple steel kama on a chain, but with a large polearm strapped to his back. Last time it had been a traditional katana, before that a wuju blade, and the time before that he had actually tried bringing a set of bow and arrows. After she had shattered it within the first few moments of the exchange, he had begrudgingly agreed afterward that it had not been his greatest decision.

The red glow of his eyes from the magical technique began to fade and finally his full form solidified. He stood on the rafters with an easy confidence, looking down at her with an arrogant smile. Oh, Irelia was going to enjoy knocking that off his face. He tipped his head forward slightly in what she could only assume was his version of a respectful bow, although it was more than likely sarcastic. His long black braid dangled over his shoulder before being thrown behind his back with a casual shove.

“Blade Dancer,” he called from above.

“Kayn,” she replied, deigning to use his actual name rather than any of the titles others liked to label him with.

“I saw that kick you made,” he said tilting his head toward the shattered remains of one of the dummies. “You’re one to talk about showing off.”

“Sometimes a dance is more about letting the movement and spirits carry you, and less about efficiency,” Irelia shot back at him.

Kayn seemed to find that funny as he chuckled derisively at her. “I hope those flourishes don’t leave you wanting as you face me this night.” She could see in the glint of his eyes that he was especially confident this time. His grin bordered on sheer glee as he tightened his grip on his kama. Irelia idly wondered what had put him in such a good mood. Sure, he always seemed to enjoy their little spars, but tonight he looked practically ready to burst. Even through his arrogant smile, the near-childlike excitement he held shined through and Irelia caught a quick glance of the regular young man beneath the cold killer. Having seen many of her fellow youths fall prey to misery, anger, and depression after the war, it heartened her to see a little bit of something else even in someone like him.

She grinned as a thought ran through her head. “Now what makes you think that I even want to face you tonight?” she began, a lighter teasing tone in her voice. “You can’t keep me here, and you’re certainly not going to chase me all throughout this fort if I were to leave.” Irelia hummed for a moment with a hand on her chin in thoughtful consideration. “No,” she said resolutely, “I’m afraid I just don’t think that I’m a match for you tonight, so I respectfully concede.” She bowed to him, a proper one as opposed to what he had given her,  “Now, I’m going to go down to the dining hall. I heard they are serving seared scryor fish tonight, and that sounds absolutely wonderful. If you wait here, I can get an extra plate and bring it back if you would like.”

His smile faltered at that, replaced by a look of confusion. Usually they would have gotten to it already, but he was taken aback by the the outright refusal. “Wait, what?” he stuttered out, “but we’ve never… That’s not how this is supposed to work.” Kayn was obviously itching for a fight, and Irelia had to carefully control herself to keep from laughing out loud at the look of pure indignation and worry on his face. He was much nicer to look at when that cocky smile wasn’t plastered there, Irelia thought to herself. She remembered how her brother Kai had once pulled something like this on her when he had taken one of her favorite sets of dancing ribbons from her. She had burst into his room, red in the face, fully expecting a scuffle as they had done more than a hundred times, but he had treated her with pure respect and kindness. Simply returning the silk ribbons to her with a ruffle of her hair before leaving. Irelia imagined that her face had looked exactly like Kayn’s was now.

Deciding that she had teased him enough, she feigned a turn toward the door before spinning around and launching her blades at him in the rafters. She spotted a moment of surprise in his face before he quickly swung down to escape their murderous path. Kayn righted himself quickly as he sent another batch of shuriken flying toward her. With an easy roll clear, Irelia then leaped forward, tired of the battle of pot-shots and ready to test just how good he thought he was with that kama and polearm.

He deflected a blade with the edge of his weapon, and blocked a kick with a push of his forearm. Throwing the chain of the kama around her leg, he tried to yank her off her balance, but Irelia pivoted herself off the edge of one of her blades and broke free of the attempted hold. They stood several meters from one another, a scowl having replaced Kayn’s earlier grin.

“What was that about?” he demanded. Clearly he was still upset at the short little joke she had pulled. That made her smile grow even larger.

“Oh, just a little something I learned from one of my brothers,” she said. A little bit of longing sadness had crept into her voice for the moment. “You and your Order are well versed in fear, but kindness can be quite disarming as well, wouldn’t you agree?” His eyes narrowed as they circled one another.

Kayn was on the offensive then, violence being his answer to her question. Swinging the weighted ball at the other end of the chain above his head and sending it speeding toward her as fast as a viper striking its prey. It wrapped around the edge of the blade she had used to block it with. He yanked the blade away with the chain and exploited the momentary break in her formation to lunge forward with the kama. His movements practiced and natural as though he had been using this weapon his whole life. Fortunately for Irelia, she too was as natural with the weapons she wielded. She responded with a sharp slide below his incoming strike before swinging two blades in an uppercut toward the center of his chest. Kayn jumped in a smooth somersault, but the trick blocked his vision from the incoming hit. Irelia shot her knee upward toward the arm grasping the kama.  

The hit connected and it forced the kama out of his hands, launching it away and spiralling through the air to impale itself into the woven floor mat. He tried to yank it back with the chain, but part of it was still wrapped around one of her blades. A grand sway of her arm swept the rest of the metal links out of his hands and cast them across the room. True to his earlier critique on her artful flourishes, he was able to land a solid kick to her gut, knocking a bit of the air out of her lungs.

Irelia leapt away, but placed herself between him and the kama, keeping him away from it. He simply grinned in response as he slid the long polearm off his back and spun the wickedly sharp end toward her. She charged him, needing to get in close to counter the range of his weapon. His smile grew larger, expecting such an action as a series of tattoos on his skin began to glow blue and he melted away into an ethereal shadow and a puff of black mist.

She only let it surprise her for a moment before she spun around and brought all of her blades down behind her. They smashed into the polearm as Kayn was rising out of her shadow on the ground. The two of them had their weapons locked against each other. She returned his confident grin with one of her own.

“You used that one a few months ago. Learn some new tricks, Kayn,” she taunted him.

“And what makes you think I haven’t?” he replied. Something in his eyes concerned her, however, a scheming confidence as he began to shift into the shadows once again. She readied herself, trying to determine where he would come out next, but this time the shadows surged toward her. Irelia’s eyes grew wide as darkness consumed her vision. Her blades around her spun around in panic as she was frozen in place by the encroaching darkness.

Kayn’s laughter from earlier reverberated in Irelia’s head and drowning out all else. The lanterns around the room were all huffed out and replaced by the moon through the windows as the sole source of light. She could feel a cold grip wrap around her heart, his shadow magic curling through her veins and for a moment she was afraid that he would actually try to kill her tonight. Her breathing began to come in gasps as panic set in, all the while the laughter in her mind grew louder. His shadow magic intermingling within hers and ripping it apart as the darkness on the edge of her vision drowned out what little light was left.

Irelia’s blades began to tremble and lurch from side to side as the foreign magic spread into them as well. The rest of the room was blacked out and the only things she could see were her glinting blades around her. Her connection to them began to falter. Flickering like a candle in the wind. They turned inward and began making a slow, deadly path toward her as they were pushed along by tendrils of foreign magic. He was trying to rip them out of her hands like she had done with his kama. Trying to control them, her family’s seal, a part of her as much as her own heart becoming colder with the growing shadows.

The thought steeled her resolve. Anger filling her so much that she could feel a surprised reaction from Kayn’s magic. Memories of her family flashed behind her eyes. Quiet mornings with her father as the rest of her family still slept, the smell of the peppermint tea he loved so much filling the air. Zelos crouching beside her when she was a little girl after she had fallen after climbing the shimmermist tree behind their house, breaking her arm. He told her horrible joke after horrible joke, trying to lift her spirits as he carried her to the local healing house.

Irelia remembered the time she pinned both Kai and Ohn on the ground after they had teased her for mimicking the Lhotlan dancer that had passed through town. Irelia could feel the satisfaction and hear the sound of her mother’s laughter when she saw them struggling to get out from her hold. Irelia saw the time the time she had made little Ru squeal and laugh with a silly dance she had invented before spinning her around in her arms. 

Irelia saw herself in the moment her O-ma had given her her first set of silk dancing trails. Irelia could feel her O-ma’s arms around her after she had leaped into her arms, thanking her over and over again.

These images tore through the shadows curling through her mind, and she could feel the heartbeat of Ionia beneath her feet once again. Her blades made from the memories of her family righted themselves and spun around her in a maelstrom of whirling metal. Power flowed through her and, like a roaring flame, it cut through the darkness gripping her heart. With a shout, Irelia could feel Kayn’s magic falter and retreat, scorched by the force of her own magic before being expelled from her soul.

As though he were launched from the barrels of a Bilgewater frigate, Kayn was flung away. He crashed through half a dozen or so practice dummies, smashing them bits before coming to rest at the far wall of the training room. Kayn sat up confused and a little dazed yet still holding onto his polearm. They were both breathing hard from the exertion, and his eyes grew large when he saw her face.

She was practically snarling from across the room, her blades trembling in rage and mirroring the muscles in her arms. Irelia dashed across the room and by the look in her eyes it was clear that this was no longer a friendly competition. The next swing of her blades had every ounce of her strength behind them. They slammed into the ground, scattering broken pieces of wood everywhere, but Kayn had rolled out of the way just in time. He stood up some paces away from her, and unflinchingly yanked out a thick shard of wood that had embedded itself in his shoulder. Kayn’s confident smile was replaced by a firm, determined set of his mouth.

He seemed to decide that he had spent enough time on the back foot and charged her. He wielded the heavy pitched polearm as fluidly as he had the numerous other weapons that he had used against her before. Irelia dodged, dashed, and spun away from the strikes and swipes that would have opened her up like a hunter skinning an animal. He was always able to push her, force her to go that extra bit to keep up in order to win. Irelia swung her arm down and two blades curled down in an arc that would have impaled him from either side, but only to find that he had disappeared into the shadows once more. She heard a sweep through the air and had just enough wherewithal to lean down to avoid the speeding blade. Missing the blade by a hair’s breadth, she couldn’t dodge the other end of the  polearm as the hardened wooden shaft slammed into her legs and taking her balance out with them.

She landed on the mat with a grunt, but quickly threw her weight around, spinning her body and returning his blow to her legs with a strong kick of her own. He fell alongside her with eyes wide in shock. Giving up all pretenses of grace and movement, Irelia rolled over and pinned him to the ground. In this position, his polearm was less than useless as it effectively kept his arm in place as she drove her knee into his forearm. A loud crack echoed through the room as his bones broke. Effectively immobilized for the moment, Irelia delivered a sundering, brutal punch across his jaw followed by another, then another, and another.

“Yield!” she yelled at him as she dragged his face up by the collar of his vest. He glared into her eyes without an ounce of fear. He swung the unpinned arm up to strike her side repeatedly, but her armor plated suit absorbed most of their power. Irelia would definitely have a wealth of bruises, but in this moment she didn’t let it distract her.

Kayn’s strikes stopped when three of her blades came around to encircle his throat. The razor sharp metal pressed into his skin, and drawing a bit of blood when he grunted trying to get out of the hold. They were both breathing hard and each of their bodies shook from the exertion of the fight. But through it all, the strength of their glares didn’t waver for even a moment. Irelia could feel his heart racing in time with her own through the metal of her blades. Kayn gave a strangled gasp as she pressed the sharp edges even deeper into the soft flesh of his neck, and he finally relaxed, slapping the mat with his hand.

Irelia let out a giant breath that she hadn’t known she was holding in. The blades recalled from Kayn’s neck and fanned out behind her back. She fell to the side, rolling over to stare at the ceiling as they both came down from the adrenaline of the battle.

Irelia felt… empty. She didn’t feel like she won anything there. Their previous exchanges had always been enjoyable. Difficult to be sure, as any good spar should be, but that fight hadn’t been fun at the end. She recalled how she felt after breaking through Kayn’s spell, her pounding heartbeat the only thing in her ears and the pure, unadulterated rage filling every ounce of her being. She hadn’t felt that much rage since she killed  Duqal at Dalu bay, and it made her a little sick. Kayn wasn’t her enemy. He was an arrogant ass sometimes and it probably gave her way too much satisfaction to wipe that confident grin off his face, but her stomach turned at the idea of losing control like that.

A small groan to her side broke through her thoughts. She turned her head to the side to see Kayn working his jaw around with the hand on his uninjured arm. His face was a splotchy mess and his nose was bleeding, but he didn’t seem that overly concerned with it.

“Your punches could use some work,” he said pushing a sweaty bit of his hair away from his eyes, “not very graceful I’d say for someone who styles themself as a dancer.” He sounded a bit like an angry child in that moment that it almost made her laugh until her eyes locked on the red lines on his neck caused by her blades. Irelia sighed, feeling a little guilty as she got up with a grunt of pain. She was definitely going to have plenty of bruises tomorrow, but she still made her way to the the cupboard on the wall and grabbed a medical kit before returning to Kayn’s side.

“They weren’t meant to be, but sometimes you do what feels right, you ass,” she replied eliciting an amused exhale from the man still laying on the ground. “Up, up,” Irelia ordered, “I want to get those bandaged up,” she gestured to the puncture on his shoulder and his broken wrist. He grumbled a bit, but sat up all the same.

For a while neither of them said anything, content to let Irelia work in silence. As she stitched his shoulder, however, she blurted out a quick, “Sorry.” Both for the likely mediocre-at-best job she was doing patching up the wound, and for the events that had caused it. Kayn just shrugged with his good shoulder.

“Doesn’t matter,” he said. In a different situation, she might have tried to go on, but the way Kayn said those two words were absolutely convincing that he didn’t actually care that much about the wounds. She nodded in response and went back to her work.

“So,” she began with a swipe of healing oil across his shoulder, “you looked far more eager for this fight than you normally would be if you were simply in between missions and looking for a fight out of boredom. I’m guessing that you came here because you were getting fed up training with your fellow acolytes again?” His exasperated groan was answer enough for her and she giggle a bit in response.

“Ridiculous that Master Zed has me training such inexperienced people. Yen Bei kept messing up a her shadow shifting, and Popo absolutely cannot conceal himself nearly as well as he thinks he can,” Kayn said. “Their previous teachers assured me that they’d be more than ready for my training, but in the first ten minutes Yen Bei actually got herself halfway stuck in the ground. Took Popo nearly an hour to actually get her out of it.” Irelia chuckled a bit at the mental picture as she began to wrap the wound.

“Think they will get better?” she asked idly as she moved to work on the broken wrist.

Kayn shrugged as well as he could with the thick bandaging, “They aren’t the worst, but I still think it’s a waste of my talents to spend my time teaching. To make matters worse, Master Zed is travelling on a mission and so I couldn’t even train with him either. So you were the only one I could think of.”

“Hmph,” she grunted, “So I guess coming here was just you scraping the bottom of the barrel for sparring partners? Well, you shouldn’t think so highly of yourself. I do believe that tonight makes our record seven-to-six in my favor.” Irelia tried, and undoubtedly failed, to contain a cheeky grin as she wanted to save Kayn a little dignity, knowing that otherwise he would start to pout in that way he always denied that he did.

“It’s seven-to-seven,” he grumbled.

“No, that time you tackled me as I was making you some tea doesn’t count.”

“And why not? You were unprepared and I saw an opportunity,” Ah, there’s that pout , Irelia thought to herself even though Kayn’s look was still deadly serious. It was quickly wiped from his face, however, as in an instant he found himself pressed cheek down on the floor, Irelia twisting his arm and still broken wrist behind him.

“So does this make it eight to seven now?” she taunted. Never one to give up when challenged, Kayn tried to push and struggle away. Irelia saw the tale-tell signs of his shadow tattoos glowing as he tried to phase out of her grip into the darkness. She dug his face even harder into the floor and gripped his broken wrist tighter, causing him to gasp a bit. “What does that make it now?” she demanded. Her voice was like iron, unyielding and hard.

A few moments passed of quiet struggle. She pressed one of her blades against his back, and Kayn eventually relaxed. “Seven to six,” he breathed out. Irelia nodded with a satisfied smile and released her hold on him. She could have demanded a more firm admission, teased him a little bit more, but she decided that with him she should take what she could get.

They both went quiet again for some time as Irelia re-set his broken wrist with some bandages and a splint before getting to work cleaning the mess of cuts and blood elsewhere. Irelia had plenty of experience with field dressing from the war. These days she still kept a small amount of healing salves, potions, and other supplies within her blades’ pack. Never hurt to be prepared. She had to watch too many die during the war because they weren’t. Not always the best healer as some people had complained to her, but Kayn didn’t seem to object too much. He just continued to glance at her with a questioning looks every so often. He wanted to say something to her, that was for sure. “Something on your mind?” she asked.

Kayn scoffed a bit and turned his head away only for Irelia to grab his face and yank it back to get to the blossoming bruise on his cheek. He stared at her indignantly, but let her continue her task while he mumbled something under his breath. “What was that?” she said.

“Those memories, were those…” he seemed to struggle as he looked for the right words, “were those of your family?” Irelia’s hand froze as she was wiping away at his cheek. Oh, he saw those , she realized. She went back to treating him for a bit before she answered.

“Yes, they were, but you know,” she said as she caught his eyes with a serious look, “many would consider taking a peek at someone’s memories to be quite rude. But then again,” she shrugged a bit, “with the amount of stories they tell of me, I’m sure there are people out there who would be able to retell my childhood back to me better than I could.” She gave him a small smile before she grabbed his injured shoulder tightly and dug the heel of her palm deep into the bandaged wound. “That being said,” she began, a tight smile plastered on her face, “if you ever think about doing it again, then I’m just going to have to teach you an even tougher lesson than one you learned here tonight. Understand?”

A full laugh escaped him at that, “Sure sure, you don’t want to use the same techniques against an opponent who’s expecting it anyways.” His grin grew a little more sinister, “I’ll be sure to master something new to crush you with next time.”

“Hmph,” she grunted with a roll of her eyes, “I was hoping the rudeness of it would be enough of a reason, but I guess I’ll settle for competitive drive instead.” She finished up the cleaning and bandages, and sat back, checking her work. Kayn rolled his shoulders around to make sure everything was still working.

“I wasn’t trying to take a look. Those memories were just very... strong,” he said while flexing the hand with the broken wrist. Kayn looked like he was considering something, his face a serious and contemplative mask.

“My family was very important to me,” she said in response. Irelia couldn’t help the melancholic tone that crept into her voice, so she busied herself with packing away all the medical supplies. “It’s a fact that I’ve never shied away from.” She placed the pack away in the cupboard once again.

“They looked… nice,” his words were distinctly more careful than normal which Irelia found odd. He had never been one to be careful about what he said. Perfectly willing to point out any and all mistakes she had made during a fight. She turned around and looked at him, but he didn’t meet her eyes.

“They were,” she said just as carefully, “Not a day goes by where I do not miss them.” Kayn continued to look down at his bandaged hand, clenching it into a fist. She could see from across the room how much it was trembling.

“I hope you made them pay,” the anger in his voice for people that he had never met surprised her a bit. Then Irelia remembered Admiral Duqal , and felt an old, similar anger burning low within her. She had surged forward at the Battle of Dalu Bay, leaping from ship to ship, cutting through more Noxians that she could count. She only felt one thing that day, only had one desire: kill Duqal and avenge her family. Before she knew it, she was on his flagship. Several of his guards had already fallen before they even knew she was upon them. When Irelia looked into Duqal’s eyes across the ship, she saw nothing there. There was not even the barest flicker of recognition, and that infuriated her more than anything else. The thought that the murder of her family meant nothing to him. That it was a mere afterthought in the crimes he had committed against Ionia.

What came next she could never quite recall. She remembered a few flashes of red from the blood of the officers that tried to rush her, and then the pained shock filling Duqal’s eyes as her blades pierced through the thick plates of his armor, pinning him to the mast of the ship. Her hands had trembled with such rage then, and she refused to blink so she wouldn’t miss a single moment of the light slowly fading from his eyes. The fear and pain she saw there was a greater pleasure than anything she had felt in a long time.

Irelia didn’t hear how her forces cheered as they drove the rest of the Noxians into the sea. Didn’t feel the heat as the ships around her burned in the bay. After Duqal’s lifeless body had crumpled to the floor and the uncontrollable fury began to recede, she felt nothing. She had hoped for joy or at least relief, but she felt a crushing emptiness settle in her heart. Avenging her family should have made her happy, but when she looked around and saw how much blood dripped from her blades, the remnants of her family’s crest, all she could feel was a painful shame. The last two pieces of of her family’s line, both stained and dripping with blood, equally broken in that moment.

“Yes, I killed them all,” she murmured as she returned to what Kayn had said, her voice not much more than a whisper. If Kayn hadn’t looked up to meet her eyes, she wouldn’t have thought he had heard her. His brow creased in confusion.

“You don’t seem happy about it,” he said. Irelia walked back toward him and sat down on her knees in front of him.

“They deserved to die for what they did,” she said resolute. The Tyrants would find no sympathy from her. No, in this she only mourned her own soul and the memories of her ancestors. Afraid of how her family saw her from their place among the Spirits as she dedicated her life to violence instead of beauty and peace. “But my vengeance came at a great cost.”

“What could be worth more than bringing death to those that threaten Ionia?” he bit.

“You can’t reduce these things simply to better or worse,” she replied, “Am I happy the people that killed my family are dead and the Tyrant’s expelled? Yes, of course I am. But Ionia was tested in the war. We achieved definition in conflict, and showed what we are capable of. I just hope that what we may become is worthy of the sacrifices. The amazing things we used to be that we had to give up.”

“Traditions that outlive their usefulness need to be culled and discarded. There is no place for weakness when Ionia must be strong.”

“If we throw away all that we love and hold dear, then what will we have left when it’s over?” she said.

“You are alive, and they are not. That is what matters.” he shot back. She already knew that. Irelia could see that fact plainly in the faces of the people who would not be here had Noxus been able to destroy them.  

“While fighting may have been necessary, it didn’t bring my family back. It doesn’t allow me to hear Zelos’ terrible jokes or the sounds of Kai, Ohn, or Ruu playing. I won’t ever feel my father’s arms around me again or hear my O-ma’s laughter,” Irelia’s voice caught a bit, “And I don’t know if I would deserve to anymore after the things we all had to do.”

To her surprise, Kayn rolled his eyes and looked at her like she was a simpleton. “I’d take a live person over a dead one any day. At least alive you can do something. Get stronger. You survive, do what you have to, and if you can save Ionians while doing it, then it doesn’t matter what some old traditions say. If you don’t think that’s worth it, then that means I overestimated you.”

Irelia was taken aback for a moment at his directness, but it was refreshing in a way and she couldn’t resist a little chuckle at it. “I wish things were as easy as that,” she told him, “but my heart isn’t ready to simply let these things go just yet.” A slow smile crept its way onto Irelia’s face and she leaned forward a bit toward him, “And you’d better watch yourself, I think that was almost a compliment you just gave me.” She reached her hand up and flicked away the hair that he always let cover one of his eyes. Kayn’s face recoiled in such utter disgust that Irelia could not help but laugh even more. She couldn’t resist an opportunity to try and mess with him a bit. His reactions were always so dramatic, and it was nice to see that cock-sure face of his replaced by something a little more amusing.

She let him be and sat back again. They simply sat in silence, but it was not a painful one. Irelia had to admit that it was nice to talk with someone about these things other than her soldiers or Karma. Her soldiers looked to her for leadership and strength, not her wobbling triflings, and Karma was sometimes just as conflicted as she was. A thousand lifetimes not providing much guidance as they sought a third path for Ionia’s future. Her thoughts were interrupted, however, by a growl that came from Kayn’s stomach. “Hungry?” she asked him with a laugh, “I wasn’t lying earlier about the scryor fish in the dining hall. It’s actually quite good if you want me to go grab you some and bring it back. It might make up for the thrashing I gave you.”

He eyed her murderously while she simply smiled as if she had no idea what his problem might’ve been. “I never would have expected the so-called Hero of the Placidium to gloat so much,” he said with a cross of his arms.

“I’m just returning what you give me, and maybe trying to stoke that competitive drive of yours. I’m doing you a favor really, you should thank me.” He continued to glare at her, not dignifying that with an answer. “I’m offering you food, the least you could do would be to acknowledge my amazing generosity,” she was only slightly serious and waited for an answer. His response was another roll of his eyes and a long suffering sigh.

“Fine, if you won’t leave it alone,” Kayn waved his hand toward the door, “Go get the food then.” She stood up, but instead of walking out, she made her way closer to him and leaned down with her face a few inches from his own. He looked at her cautiously but didn’t recoil when she placed a gentle hand on his cheek. They stayed like that for a moment as Irelia watched his face redden a bit, and she gave him a soft, innocent smile.

Then she shoved his face to the side, toppling him over.

He responded quickly as he tried to sweep her legs out after he went down, but she merely danced away a bit, laughing. Kayn righted himself and his face was a red hot mix of anger, confusion, and - judging by the bright red color of his cheeks - embarrassment. Not at all sure what to actually do, and out of his depth. Irelia was quickly realizing just how much she loved eliciting those kinds of reactions from him. She clicked her tongue disappointingly, “That was a lesson. Next time someone offers you food, say thank you. The guest and host, each are equally responsible for good hospitality.”  Now, stay here and don’t let me hear that you were snooping and spying around my fort any more than you already have.” She winked at him before turning around toward the door, pushing her hair over her shoulder as she went.

As Irelia closed the door behind her, she just barely missed the even more confused look on his face. She also missed the way Kayn had gingerly lifted his hand and placed it lightly on his cheek where her own hand had just been.