Chapter Text
Baby Steps
Chapter One
After nearly a week of grueling 14-hour shifts, a caseload that refused to let up, and being on a stake-out with an asshole of a soon-to-be ex partner, Jared Padalecki practically fell in the door of his home. The only thing he wanted to do was to slip into an exhaustion-induced coma and sleep the next four days.
He’d been given a commendation for a job well done on breaking the drug and prostitution ring the department had been after for months. Then he’d been given time off after he punched the asshole, now definitely ex-partner in the face in front of a whole room of cops.
At 28, Jared was one of the youngest in the San Rio Texas Police Department to make full detective. He’d been driven to succeed in his chosen profession ever since he was five years old and he’d decided he wanted to be a cop. Now, after fighting to get to this place he could finally succeed and be taken seriously, considering the fact that anyone who saw him only saw who his family was, or how he had chosen to live his life.
Rarely did they see anything past a 6’4”, usually smiling, happy, laughing young man with dark brown hair that touched his shoulders and often fell into deep hazel eyes, and usually Jared accepted that. Except, lately he’d found himself wanting more and he seriously, in his sleep-deprivation, blamed the new guy who’d recently moved into the other side of his house two months earlier… Or, actually, the ever active, very loud baby that had moved in with his neighbor.
Ever since the day when his landlady, or, as Jared often called her, ‘Grandma’ told him she’d rented the other side of the split level house she owned and that Jared lived in and paid rent for, he’d known it could be a problem on a couple levels.
The first was trying to sleep with a baby living on the other side of walls that were not very thick, as Jared discovered, shortly after the first full day of his new neighbors moving in. The child, whom Jared hadn’t actually seen, or the father, so he didn’t even know if it was a boy or girl, had cried on and off all night. That told Jared either the kid didn’t like sleep or it was the most colicky baby in existence.
The second problem was a bit more troublesome and it was the reason why Jared was trying to avoid even meeting the guy and his kid. Jared knew if he had one weakness, it was his soft heart. Certain things triggered that soft heart into overruling his head, including babies, drop dead gorgeous guys with a baby, or a hard life. Those things would instantly trigger Jared’s need to protect and he’d been burned too many times to risk it again.
His grandmother, Evie Padalecki, knew about his infamous soft heart and soft head according to his siblings. She said she’d been wary about renting to the man and child but had given in because she just couldn’t bear to see him taking that poor baby and living in one of those run-down places on the other side of the city. Jared’s nosy but loving grandmother had subtly asked, and it seemed as there was no wife or girlfriend in the picture.
So far Jared had just caught glimpses of the guy either coming or going, and he noticed that when he was home he kept to himself and, in two months, no one had ever visited. At least not when Jared was home, so that made the cop begin to wonder just who’d moved in with a small baby that wouldn’t even have a friend or family come to visit.
Being a cop and also an over watchful person meant that Jared typically kept a close eye on things. Because of this, he’d been able to pick up on a few subtle things. The first was the fact that the guy’s car looked like it was on its last legs. It was an older model Chevy, probably older than Jared himself, and you could see more rust than color on the body. It also had a dangerous sounding miss. Jared had heard the car being started at some ungodly hour and had distantly wondered where in the hell the guy would be taking a baby before six in the morning. The guy hadn’t gotten home until after nine that night… And boy, had that kid cried that night.
He also noticed that most of the groceries that came in was either baby food, formula, diapers, or other stuff for the baby. Jared hadn’t been snooping but he happened to look out the front window, and the guy had left some stuff on the porch when he’d taken the baby inside to get it settled or whatever babies did that never seemed to sleep during the day.
When he started taking his neighbors’ trash to the curb the evening before trash day, Jared felt that the single bag of trash was probably mostly diapers. He began to wonder if the guy even ate. He hardly saw real food being brought in. He’d never once even seen a pizza guy come to the door and he couldn’t recall smelling anything cooking since it was summer and Jared usually had his windows open to relieve some of the heat before he had to break down and turn on the A/C.
So far though, he’d managed to avoid meeting his neighbors but that was about to change. As he laid on his couch wishing for sleep, he heard the car pull into the drive more loudly than normal at… He peeked through heavy eyes to frown when he saw that it was nearly 10:30 at night. This was the latest he’d ever heard the mystery guy come home.
Jared was pushing himself up with an inner warning to not go to the door, to not open the door and most definitely to not go out his door as he heard the baby crying. Jared frowned, however, as he realized this wasn’t the usual crying he heard. No, this was downright sobbing and as he heard the man speak to soothe the upset child, he wondered how much longer before the father began to cry. Jared could just hear the mix of exhaustion, worry, buried anger, and fear in the low, hushed voice.
He heard something hit the porch, and then something else thudded but then this thud broke and when he heard a sudden and very unexpected ‘Fuck!’, he was on his feet and moving. In two months, he’d barely heard the guy talk much less cuss unless it was the morning, the clunker of a car that wouldn’t start, but even then it wasn’t that word.
Jared had been brought up in a well-off, Texas family with a grandmother who was quite strict and stern about foul language. She thought everything had its place and time but that word had been banned in the Padalecki house or else the offender’s mouth tasted like soap for days afterward.
As a cop, foul language was something Jared was fluent in, but even then, he seemed to keep from using that word except in the worst of times, so hearing it now made him concerned.
By the time he got to the door, he could hear how much more upset both baby and father sounded. It seemed like the guy was struggling to get the door open while shushing his child, and suddenly it clicked in Jared’s mind that his own car was also in the driveway so the guy was probably trying to keep the baby from disturbing him.
“Shhh, it’s okay, baby girl. I know you’re tired. So’s Daddy. And I know it’s been a bad day for us, and that you don’t like the new babysitter. I’ll try to find a new one, since I also have to find a new job now. I have to do both before long cause there’s not enough money in the bank to handle rent, bills, and your formula, much less repair that thing that will probably blow up on us one day in the middle of nowhere and… Oh, fuck!”
One of the bags he’d been trying to juggle, along with his bookbag and his daughter, suddenly fell along with a second one. The glass jars could be heard breaking, and the quiet resolve that Jensen Ackles had been maintaining for the last several months broke as well.
The 26 year old had known moving away from his home in San Antonio would be hard but since the choice was to either move or be pressured into giving his baby up, Jensen made the choice to move. He’d known from the second he heard that heartbeat for the first time that he wouldn’t give up his child for love or money.
So, after Piper was born, he’d packed what little he had in his beat-up car and gotten as far as he could from his home, his family, and the jackass who had knocked him up in the first place.
In the space of a year, Jensen had gone from sheltered but trying to get out from under his family’s thumb, to being totally on his own with a six month old daughter. Jensen juggled trying to attend summer college classes at a small community college he’d found in San Rio during the day, and working his ass off in a restaurant waiting tables in the next town to earn money to keep his ever growing daughter in clothes and food.
Jensen had chosen San Rio to be their new home because (a) it had a decent community college and it was large that he wouldn’t be noticed but still small enough to have a nice feel to it and (b) he’d run out of gas and took it as a sign.
They’d spent a couple nights in the car since the weather was warm and he’d been trying to save his money for a down payment for rent or something, so when he’d noticed the ad for this place, he’d called about it.
Jensen wasn’t stupid, despite what people back home thought. He knew that a lot of people still looked down on guys like him. Being gay was hard enough, but being one of the rare kind of guys that could actually get pregnant made things even harder but he’d been lucky so far.
Evie Padalecki was a warm and friendly little old woman with Texas manners down to her ring-covered hand and kind green eyes when she’d played peek-a-boo with a cranky Piper. Jensen could tell the older woman had been hesitant to rent to him and he wasn’t sure for which reason. He hadn’t pushed, however; he’d politely thanked her for her time. He had one other potential place, but it was in a side of San Rio that made his nerves stretch, and it wasn’t his first choice to take his daughter. He also knew he couldn’t keep her in the car too much longer either.
When he’d asked for driving directions to the housing complex, the older woman’s eyes had about bugged out of her head and she’d very simply, very primly said he was not taking ‘this sweet jewel of a child anywhere close to that hellhole of heathens’. She’d slid the keys to the empty side of the house she owned.
The house was a split house that she told him her grandson, her cop grandson, lived in but that he kept crazy, ungodly hours and was hardly home, so Jensen probably would never even see him. So far, in two months, he honestly really hadn’t.
Jensen had caught rare glimpses, either coming or going. For the most part, though, he’d kept to himself and tried to keep Piper quiet but this move was just as hard on his little girl as it was for Jensen. She hadn’t adjusted to sleeping in the new place well, in addition to having colic at night. He’d been waiting for the complaints to start but, so far, nothing.
Either his neighbor was deaf, a dead sleeper, or not home when they were. That wasn’t often, since between school and work, Jensen was never home. He would be home more now since he’d managed to lose his babysitter and his job both in the span of a day and night. The babysitter wasn’t really a tragic loss since Piper hated her anyways and the babysitter hadn’t been nice to her at all. The job, however, was his sole source of income, and he’d lost it due to being tired after weeks of running on little sleep, a hard paper to write, and while being forced to work a double shift, a guy at the restaurant had come on a little too strong.
Jensen was reserved. It had been a huge shame to his well-off, society conscious family back in San Antonio that their youngest son was a shy bookworm who preferred reading and simple things compared to parties, snobbish people, or random sex with hot women.
At 6’1”, with a lean body that was leaner these days despite giving birth, Jensen had been told plenty of times that his rugged good looks made him perfect to marry into one of the other society families. He was too quiet, though, too shy; and his constant refusal to wear contacts over his glasses were an embarrassment… Not as big an embarrassment as when he not only announced he was gay but also pregnant. He was certain he’d never forget the dead silence in his parents’ home that night or the rage that followed.
Tonight he’d been too stressed to deal with the grabby hands and lewd words of a guy that he’d already constantly turned down ever since he was first hired, so when the guy grabbed him. Jensen reacted the way a friend back in high school had taught him and he’d been briefly proud to think that he might have broken the guy’s nose. Or he was before the snooty manager who hadn’t liked him ever since the owner hired him had fired him for not being able to control his violent tendencies.
Jensen resisted the urge to tell her that if he couldn’t control those, he probably would’ve leveled the guy a month earlier when he made the first inappropriate pass. He was able to control himself, though, and had simply taken his meager week’s wages and gone to pick Piper up from the new babysitter they had to find, after the first girl’s parents hadn’t approved of Piper being born to a guy… A gay guy to boot.
Since he’d had to work a double, even before being fired, that put Jensen late so he’d found his daughter already crying in a playpen in a soiled diaper and with an empty bottle. The older man simply said that his daughter wasn’t paid past a certain point.
So now Jensen needed to find a new job and hire a new sitter, all the while going to school and keeping a roof over their heads and food in Piper’s belly. It was only a matter of time before the money given to him by his friend back home ran out, along with the little amount his father had given him when Jensen had refused the demand to abort his child or give her up for adoption.
Right then, all he was trying to do was get through his damn door. He wanted to get his daughter in a soothing bath, feed her, and pray she slept for an hour so he could start looking for want ads over the weekend. He hoped this could be achieved all the while not disturbing the neighbor whose car was actually in the driveway. This let Jensen know that his neighbor was actually home. All of a sudden, the rest of his life seemed to turn against him.
Piper was still screaming and choking out sobs until her chubby cheeks were red. She was usually a happy baby… Well, except for the whole sleeping thing and that night she was tired, hot, hungry, and determined that Daddy know it.
Jensen was shushing Piper as best he could, given that he was one crack away from crying himself. Suddenly, he dropped his keys, and the bag went with it, shattering the jars of baby food inside. Just like that, Jensen’s nerves snapped. All he could do was slide down the wall on the porch. He held his crying and upset daughter to his chest and let out a muffled sob that contained all his worry and frustration.
He couldn’t lose this place. He wouldn’t let anyone tell him what to do or let anyone take Piper away from him. That meant he couldn’t even call Chris and ask for money because if he did, someone back home would find out. Jensen would be getting calls and snide text messages again. He also couldn’t risk Piper’s father finding him because he wasn’t dealing with the asshole. He had made it explicitly clear that he wanted nothing to do with her or him if he kept the unwanted brat.
“Daddy’ll make it better soon, Piper,” he promised between choked tears. “I swear I will. I’ll make this place good for us and we won’t lose it no matter what I have to do. I won’t lose you either, but please… Please, honey, stop crying for one second before someone calls the cops cause they think I’m hurting you or something. I…”
“Hey, you guys okay?”
When Jared heard the broken voice change, he decided his best intentions to steer clear were overruled, and he stepped onto the porch. While Jared might be able to avoid a crying baby, there was no way he could avoid checking on the child’s father, realizing suddenly just how broken and tired he sounded.
He wasn’t sure how long he stood in the doorway, but when the man slid down the wall and just sat there clinging to the baby who was crying and now hiccupping, he figured he should do something or else his grandmother would probably slap him for being rude.
When he spoke, he was careful to keep his voice low and soothing as to not scare either crying person in front of him. Jared had to suddenly blink and swallow hard when he was pinned by two sets of identical, bright green eyes. They were filled with tears, and he watched one set go wide as if surprised to see him.
“Oh my god,” Jensen breathed. His brain had finally clicked and he realized who had spoken. It hit him that this was his neighbor; this was his landlady’s grandson. This was going to be his first real meeting with the man; when he was practically a sobbing, pathetic mess on their shared porch. “You’re… You’re home and we… We probably woke you up.” He cursed himself. He tried to push himself to his feet but his arms were still heavy with the baby, the bags that hadn’t fallen, and his bag of school books. Not only was he off balance but his body was suddenly so tired that he almost fell forward. One strong hand shot out and caught his shoulder while the other gently went to the back of Piper’s head for support.
“Take it easy there.” Jared hadn’t turned the porch light on but he could see with the light from the street. He saw exhaustion and worry and also just the slightest edge of fear. It was the last one that warned him to be more cautious than he already planned to be. “It’s fine.”
Jensen could feel panic bubbling up like it always did when he was in a situation that could turn bad. He started to ramble, anything to keep himself calm. “No, no. Mrs. Padalecki said her grandson was a cop who kept crazy hours. And who was cranky and grumpy and didn’t really care for kids, so I’ve tried to not bother you and I apologize now if Piper keeps you awake. I know she cries so much at night and tonight it’s all just… Crap, I’m sorry. You don’t care about all of this. As soon as I manage to get her inside and into a bath, she should settle down and…”
“Well, most of that’s right.” Jared had to blink several times at the rush of words and the refreshing honesty he saw in those deep, worried eyes. The way Jensen acted made Jared think that his grandmother, who was normally level-headed, had told Jensen that he didn’t like kids. “I am a cop. I do live some crazy hours as you’ve probably noticed, since we’ve never actually met face to face before now. And I can be a little cranky depending on the day I’ve had, but… I don’t dislike kids. I actually adore them.” He offered his best dimpled smile in the hopes of reassuring the man who he could still feel shaking under his hand. “In fact, if I show you my badge and swear on a stack of Bibles that I’m not a pervert or someone with evil intent…Will you let me hold her long enough for you to get the door open and bring this stuff inside?”
Before Jared had stepped out of the doorway, he’d spent some time listening to and observing the pair. A little common sense gave him a clue that the baby must be a girl. Well, that and those big eyes, soft chubby cheeks, and pink ribbon in fine blonde hair. He guessed she must have gotten that from her father as well.
It was clear to the cop that the father was wary about handing his child off to a complete stranger. Jared really appreciated that caution in today’s world of crazies but he also recognized the signs of too much stress on narrow shoulders. Being cautious, he decided to ease into this slowly and that meant actually learning this guy’s name.
“I’m Jared, by the way. In case my grandmother never told you my name and just what I did for a living. She was never too big on the details.” He slowly moved the hand away from the baby but kept his other on a tight shoulder. “She didn’t tell me your name so… What can I call you?”
“Besides a pain in the neck who’s keeping you awake?” Jensen winced at the bitterness in his voice but he’d already been told so many times what a hassle he was. This time was worse but when he realized the man, who he actually had to look up a little to see into his eyes, didn’t appear to be angry or anything, he slowly took a shaky breath. “Jensen,” he finally replied. “Jensen Ackles and this,” he wiggled the baby, who was still hiccupping but not sobbing quite so hard. “…is Piper. And we are both not usually this much of a mess but… it’s… been a bad night and she’s tired and hungry.”
“So we’d better get her inside so she can eat,” Jared offered a soothing smile that he found he meant. When Jensen offered a small, nearly shy smile, he could literally hear the brick walls start to crumble around his heart a. “Do you want to risk me taking her or the bags? I swear I won’t drop either.”
“Oh, I’ve probably already broken everything that can be broken but…” Jensen paused another second and eyed the man. He knew he would be taking a huge chance. He almost never allowed anyone new to hold or touch Piper but during the last few minutes, Jensen noticed his daughter’s sobbing had lessened, almost as if she was curious. Curious about this new voice who spoke with a deep drawl that Jensen knew could turn his nerves to mush if he wasn’t careful. “If you could just hold her until I find the keys and unlock the door, I’d appreciate it. I’m sorry.” He carefully passed Piper into the waiting arms and automatically went to adjust the hold only to see that Jared seemed to already know how to hold a baby. “Umm, you have kids?” he asked and then could’ve kicked himself for prying. “Sorry. That’s rude and so not any of my business but it’s like you knew how to hold her. Most people look at her like she’s a sack of potatoes or something.”
Jared’s smile actually grew more as he cradled the warm little body in her light pink and white onesie to his chest like his sister had taught him to do with her first child. “No, but I have nieces and nephews and a hyper sister who thought for sure I’d drop her first son if she didn’t give me a crash course in baby 101,” he grinned. He pressed his nose into the soft face who seemed to be curious about him. Jared was shocked that the change in arms didn’t have her screaming bloody murder again. “Well, hi there, sweet pea,” he greeted the child softly. Letting his finger caress her soft blonde hair, Jared saw that her eyes were heavy and it was pretty clear to him that this was one unhappy baby but she was only sniffling now. “Aren’t you a pretty little girl? You will break hearts one day.”
Once Jensen turned to snatch the keys and unlock the door, he closed his eyes. It was so hard to let his guard down but this guy, Jared, might make it harder. No one, not even the few friends he still had back in San Antonio, had ever spoken to Piper like that. It hurt him so much that people didn’t see what he did when they looked at his daughter.
Unlocking the door, Jensen reached in to turn on the lights in the small hallway. He adjusted the bags he still held before picking up the ones he’d dropped. He inwardly winced at the broken glass and knew the baby food he’d just bought was probably ruined.
“Umm, she has a little seat on the counter there you can sit her in.” Jensen knew that Jared was following him through the house to go into the kitchen by the sound of Jared cooing back at the baby who was now gurgling. “I… I appreciate you holding her and I promise to keep her quiet so you can sleep.”
Jared, even before becoming a cop, had always been a sharp-eyed kid. He noticed things other people might not or wouldn’t think to look for. As he followed Jensen through the house, those sharp eyes caught quite a few things.
He knew that Jensen’s side was basically set up the same as his, so he knew where the kitchen would be. He was a little surprised to see that most of the furniture he saw was stuff for the baby. A swing that had seen better days, a small play area that must double as a bed for naps, and something that he thought should have wheels.
The sofa against the wall looked ragged with holes in the covering. It was covered in what looked like a sheet. The only decent chair in the room was an overstuffed, pale blue chair that was placed between two windows so that any air blowing in the evening would cool them, if this is indeed where Jensen would sit with his child.
A part of Jared was suddenly getting a little concerned and he wished he’d pushed his grandmother for details on this little family. He planned to soon.
It had been a hot, humid day. The house was steaming but instead of flipping on the switch that controlled the A/C, Jensen opened the window over the sink and the glass on the back door, all the while giving a sad, little look to the bags with broken glass and throwing them in the garbage. He’d figure out how to replace those jars in the morning. He knew he had enough to feed Piper tonight and all of tomorrow.
Jensen nearly forgot about the virtual stranger in his home. Eventually, he turned around and, as his tired eyes widened, he suddenly found himself needing to lean against the sink at the sight of this tall, handsome, dimpled man holding and jiggling his daughter. Piper, bless her little heart, had forgotten all about the badness of the night and was giving Jared her rarest smile while sticky hands reached for his face.
Jensen had learned the hard way that pretty faces could still have dark hearts, and he inwardly reminded himself even as the sight of his neighbor now had his nerves kicking in. He was also reminding himself of the last time he’d even looked at a guy in any way but suspiciously or mistrustful. He’d been used before and, these days, as soon as someone learned about Piper, he was immediately considered a whore and a freak.
“Hmmm, you taste like strawberry jam.” Jared was already halfway certain his heart was lost to this baby when she let out her first giggle and smiled at him. He could feel the tension and worry from her father across the room and guessed it would take Jensen longer to warm up to him. His cop senses were screaming that this young man hadn’t had a very easy life or that something had happened that made him skittish.
“I… I had to give her something in the car and she likes jam, so…” Jensen ran his fingers through short, dark blond hair while pushing his glasses up. He squeezed the bridge of his nose. “Sorry again. You probably don’t want to know that. I’ll just take her so you can…”
“Jensen.” Jared didn’t stop the man from taking back the baby, who was suddenly squirming. He did place his hand on his arm again, and felt the tension there. “I know we just met. That’s my fault. I should’ve come over sooner to introduce myself… But I want you to know that whatever it is that’s making you uptight around me, you don’t have to be… Unless you’re a criminal with a rap sheet longer than my arm, then that could be a problem.”
Jensen nuzzled the soft skin of Piper’s cheek; a habit he did when needing to center himself. He knew he was overreacting. He knew that Jared was just being nice. Given that the guy probably hadn’t gotten a decent night’s sleep in two months, he appreciated that but it was so hard to trust after so many letdowns.
“No… No rap sheets, but...” He shifted to place Piper in her seat, and began to remove her small sandals. He took a deep breath. He wanted to stay in this house. He liked it; Piper liked it, or seemed to. And while Evie knew about their situation, Jensen wasn’t sure what she’d told her grandson. Jensen wasn’t sure if Jared would want him living next door if he knew the truth… But Jensen had made a vow to not hide anything about him, so that meant finding out now just what his opinion would be. “Did… your… Mrs. Padalecki tell you anything about us?” he asked warily, fingers starting to shake. It wasn’t easy working on the tiny buttons which was made harder when his daughter suddenly decided she didn’t want in her seat. Instead, she wanted the guy still standing behind him.
“Are you kidding?” Jared snorted with a light laugh. Jared stepped just close enough to catch one tiny waving hand in two fingers in the hopes that if she held still, her father’s hands might stop shaking. He wasn’t sure if it was his presence or where the conversation was leading to that was making him shake. “Trying to get information outta that woman is harder than breaking a crook down. I have an easier time getting details out of a lawyer or doctor than I do my own grandmother.” He made silly faces at the baby while eyeing the way Jensen was chewing his lip. “The only thing she told me was to keep my blaring music down so I didn’t disturb the precious little jewel next door. I guess she meant you, sweet pea,” he winked at the giggling baby. “Is there something you think I should know that’s got you shakin’, Jensen?”
Once the onesie was off and Piper was only in her diaper, Jensen hesitated a second before reaching up into a cabinet to grab one of the few jars of baby food. He silently prayed Jared didn’t notice how little he had. The last thing he needed to worry about was a cop thinking he couldn’t provide for his child. He’d already had enough dealings with CPS before moving here, thanks to his goddamn parents.
“Tell Daddy you want jam,” Jared whispered to the baby and Jensen couldn’t help but smile a little more. He knew his daughter would only be too happy to eat jam of any flavor any time, day or night.
“She can have jam for a snack tomorrow but tonight it’s a little strained peaches before bath, and then bottle and… Well, hopefully bed.” Jensen could only pray she slept for a little while tonight. He needed to find a new job and maybe sleep a little bit himself but that was usually secondary on his list of things to do.
Right now he needed to work up the guts to tell Jared something. What Jensen had to say could make them lose their home but he couldn’t risk the man learning about him through rumors. “Well… Ummm, I know you’re a cop so you could probably find out about me just by running my name but I’ll just tell you the two biggest things. That way if you don’t approve of it or like us, then… I can start looking for a cheap place. I think it might be why Miss Evie was wary about renting to me. She was too kind to say it but I could’ve told her that Piper and I have been called every name in the book. It stops hurting after you hear it from your own folks.”
Jared frowned at what Jensen was saying, and wondered if he realized how sad he sounded or how much he was shaking. Jensen was trembling as he reached for a small spoon. He began feeding little spoonfuls of whatever that was supposed to be to the baby. It certainly didn’t look like peaches to him.
He was surprised at the small spurt of anger he felt at the thought of anyone calling this man or his beautiful baby anything. He was surprised why they even should but he kept his mouth shut to see what Jensen would say next.
“So, I’m originally from San Antonio. You might’ve heard of my last name since it’s been associated with oil up there for a few generations,” Jensen began slowly, calming down slightly as he fed his daughter. He loved watching her face as she ate.
He could feel Jared’s closeness and wondered if it was that or the kitchen, still steamy, that was making his breath speed up. He shook that off to focus on what he was saying. “Anyway, I could bore you with the whole tale of how and why I was basically disowned because I wouldn’t give up or let them abort my baby, but you probably don’t care and the two things I need you to know… The two things that always change how people look at us is… I’m gay and… She’s my daughter.” Jensen winced when he saw Jared’s brow was crinkled in confusion. He knew he needed to make that last one a bit clearer, according to Jared’s facial expression.
“Uhhh, yeah, I guessed that by the matching eyes and nose.” Jared was slightly shocked to learn that this handsome man was gay, mainly because that admission just tripled how screwed he was. Living next door to a drop dead gorgeous guy, even one as shy and wary as Jensen, was simple… so long as Jared thought he was straight with a few dozen hot women trailing in his wake, or the mother of the adorable little one… The way Jensen said the last sentence began to settle over him and other pieces began to click.
Jared came from a family with six sisters. He’d watched Brie when she had her first one. He’d seen how protective of Noah she’d been, how guarded she was, and the tone in which she would say ‘my son’. He realized he’d just heard that same protective, proud, but still worried tone in Jensen’s voice. When Jensen laid a hand over Piper’s little chest while saying ‘my daughter’, Jared recognized how he spoke of people wanting to abort ‘my baby’ and suddenly he understood what might be scaring Jensen.
Jensen had watched the wide open face closely as he’d learned to do. He saw the confusion slowly morph into something else. The man must have figured it out on his own because he did see shock there; it was quickly gone but Jensen had seen it, and he knew the reaction that would come next.
Confrontations were things Jensen normally avoided. He’d hated them growing up and he’d tried to give people what they wanted or expected of him in order to avoid them. After learning that the only result was him being walked on and used, the young Texan was learning to stand up for himself… Right at this moment, he swore his kitchen was moving.
He’d gotten used to the shock and then the mocking but he would not allow it in front of his child. With more courage than he expected to have, he placed himself between Jared and Piper and forced himself to meet the deep hazel eyes of a guy a little taller and wider than he was.
“I… I get that the one might not be so out of the ordinary, even in Texas, but the last one… I know that it probably disgusts you to look at me now, or to think what it makes me that I gave birth to Piper. I do. I do get it and I know that’s why your grandmother probably didn’t want to rent this place to me. I’ll… I’ll start looking for a new place along with a job tomorrow because I know you don’t want to live next door to a freak or his bastard mistake.” Jensen’s head was buzzing so loud but he focused on protecting his daughter. He missed the flash of heat that passed through Jared’s eyes. Jared was so angry at the thought of people calling Jensen and his daughter filthy words so many times ever since Jensen had learned he was actually pregnant.
Seeing Jared tense had Jensen stepping forward to press a hand to his chest, as if to keep him from moving forward. “I know this is your grandmother’s house so I can’t tell you what to do in it. But if you want to yell or call me every filthy name you’re thinking of, or…hit me then you do it outside or out of the kitchen. While I can’t stop her from hearing what people call me or her, I will be damned if I will ever let her see another man raise his hand to me.” Jensen wasn’t aware when his fingers fisted into Jared’s shirt or how rapidly his eyes were blinking. His heart pounded in his buzzing head, and slowly started feeling like the kitchen was closing in around him. “I’ve been a punching bag before but I swore the day she was put in my arms, I’d never let her see me be hit so you can… whoa… I’m… When’d it get cold?”
Jared had been torn between being amused at the hand on his chest, being pissed at the thought of anyone touching Jensen to hurt him, to angry that the man would think he’d react like that without even giving him a chance to explain. All of those feelings, however, fled when he realized how pale Jensen had suddenly become, how big his eyes were, how fast his heart was beating through his ragged and worn t-shirt, and also how cold the hands fisted in his shirt had just gotten.
“Jensen?” He moved to touch his arm, when the other man suddenly jerked back as if expecting a blow. “Wait a second… Calm down and let me…Damn it. Jen!”
Jensen jerked from the hand that he expected to hit him. Tom sure as hell had done a good job of showing him what a well-placed slap could do. He knew his first duty was to protect his baby but when he went to face Jared again, all he saw were stars as the kitchen spun quickly. Before he could move to grab onto something, Jensen felt his wobbly legs suddenly going out from under him.
He dimly thought he heard Jared yell for him and he knew he heard Piper let out a sudden cry. Jensen was helpless to do anything right then but fall into the darkness, with the silent hope that while Jared wouldn’t hurt his daughter, even if Jared might hate him now.
TBC