Chapter 1: Some Things Start At The End Of Things
Chapter Text
Keith had been leaning on the balcony, watching Shiro and Curtis move through their reception, when he became aware of the silent presence behind him. He didn’t turn around - obviously Kolivan had meant him to know he was there, otherwise Keith would have no idea.
Finally, though, he got tired of waiting for Kolivan to say something. ‘What do you want?’
‘You have regrets,’ said Kolivan.
‘No. I’m glad he’s happy.’
‘But you wish that you were there beside him instead.’
Keith knocked back the remaining half of the glass of sparkling wine in his hand, and shook his head. ‘Doesn’t matter what I wish. Curtis got in before I could, more power to him. I hope they’re very happy together. I just…’
Kolivan waited, and finally came to lean on the balcony beside him. ‘Yes?’
‘I don’t know what I’m going to do next. The war’s over. There’s nobody left to fight. My blade’s gone, Voltron’s gone. I’m not the Black Paladin anymore. I’ve always been either fighting, or following Shiro. So I guess there’s nothing for me to do now.’
‘Ah. Well, you’re still a Blade. It takes more than luxite to make a Blade of Marmora, and we still have a lot to do. You can’t take an empire down in a few months.’
Keith snorted. ‘That’s nice of you, but there’s what, eight Blades now?’
‘You have so little faith in me,’ said Kolivan, cocking an eyebrow at him. ‘In fact, I have a position ready just for you. Nobody else can fill it, it’s a vital role, if you are willing to consider some duties that you may find shocking.’
‘Shocking?’ Keith frowned and turned all the way round so that both elbows leaned on the bar. ‘Shocking how, exactly?’
‘As you said, the Marmora’s numbers are low. But now we have time on our side. You are the only omega in our ranks, if you would agree to it, we could do as we used to when we were far stronger, and breed children to be raised as Blades.’
‘Hold it.’ Keith held up a hand. Kolivan waited patiently. ‘You’re saying I should get pregnant for the Marmora?’ He felt a little sick. ‘As in, artificial insemination?’
‘Not… traditionally. If you really feel that way about it then that option would be open to you, but bodily contact is important to us.’
‘Uh-huh, and… like, just the once? Or multiple times?’ He had a feeling he knew the answer as soon as he’d asked.
‘As often as you could handle it. We’re aware that humans are incredibly fragile creatures, prone to eventual injury from childbirth, but Galra are far stronger and our medical technology is far in advance of yours. You would be well cared-for and we would be watching specifically for any sign that the process was damaging you in any way.’
‘And how many - no wait, I know this one. As many different Blades as possible.’
Keith was aware that Kolivan was looking at him in silence, probably expecting him to say no. He pictured himself getting fucked again and again by faceless Blades in Marmora masks, and then helplessly pregnant, and almost retched at the mental image. Then he looked over his shoulder - Shiro and Curtis were over by the buffet table, Curtis had his arm round Shiro, their heads were close and they were smiling.
He looked back before he had to see them kiss.
Perhaps it wouldn’t be so bad. Perhaps they’d be good to him, it might feel good. He’d get to have family, maybe. Actually, that was a point.
‘I’d… get to see the kids after they were born, right?’ he said, looking up at Kolivan miserably.
Kolivan looked shocked. ‘Keith - of course you would! To suggest that we’d prevent such a thing - why would you think that?’
Keith mumbled something non-committal about care homes, wrapping his arms around himself and refusing to meet Kolivan’s gaze.
‘You’d get anything you wanted,’ said Kolivan. ‘And before you get any silly ideas about being some kind of enslaved concubine, you would still be a Blade, you could go anywhere you wanted to. The kits would belong to the Blade, yes, but also and primarily to you. Do you understand?’
You never have to be lonely again, said the little voice in the back of Keith’s mind, and he nodded. ‘Yeah. Yeah, I’ll do it. Sounds… like the next adventure.’
Kolivan smiled, and put an arm around Keith - Keith instantly let himself be folded into a gentle embrace. ‘Good. I hope it will be a good one. Is there anyone you wish to say goodbye to?’
‘No. Can we leave tonight? Can I bring Kosmo?’
‘Yes, and we can leave now, if you wish.’
Keith nodded. ‘Yeah, I’d like that. The sooner I get out of this pit the better.’
He left Earth with the music and chatter of Shiro’s wedding ringing in his ears, and he thought it would disturb him more, but he fell peacefully asleep in the back of Kolivan’s transporter, buried in Kosmo’s fur, feeling more purposeful than he had in some time.
To his surprise, he woke up not at the Marmora Base on the meteor, but at a new one that had been stationed on a moon of New Daibazaal - it was bigger, more luxurious, better supplied and had some actual outside space, if you counted the fact that the entire thing was enclosed in an atmosphere bubble to be ‘outside’.
‘Wow,’ said Keith, looking around as if he was a tourist. ‘Mom said there was a new base but she didn’t mention all this. Cool.’
‘We’re no longer at war, so we can afford to be a little less secretive,’ said Kolivan. ‘We can permit ourselves the luxury of things like running water and a variety of foods.’
‘No more protein mush, yes!’
Kolivan laughed. ‘Exactly. In fact any food you wish can be imported from New Daibazaal or New Altea.’
‘OK, I have a question though,’ said Keith. Kolivan lifted his chin in enquiry. ‘So I know only omegas can give birth, right. That means I’m not the only omega in the Marmora, because there’s my mom.’
‘Yes, and she refused. She said she was, and I quote, “a bad enough mother the first time around”. In fact she suggested I ask you.’
Keith stopped in the middle of the corridor. ‘She what?’
‘This was Krolia’s idea.’
‘But… why?’
‘I’m afraid you would have to ask her that. I only know that she felt it would be just what you needed at present.’
Keith reached up and petted Kosmo, to be sure that his wolf was still beside him, reassuringly solid and a part of home. Kosmo whined and pushed his nose into Keith’s hand.
‘If you are having second thoughts about this then it’s not too late,’ said Kolivan.
Keith swallowed. ‘No. No, I’m good. Show me around.’
‘This way, then.’ Kolivan showed him to the kitchen first, which had a large attached dining area where there were a couple of Blades already sitting around. ‘Your quarters have their own kitchen area but of course you can come and eat with us whenever you choose.’
‘Uh-huh,’ said Keith, thinking, my own kitchen? What the fuck?
The other two Blades looked up and Keith felt a little lift of recognition at the sight of them - Antok and Regris. Regris stood up and pulled down his mask, showing a delighted toothy grin which would have been terrifying to anyone who didn’t know him well, and said, ‘Keith! You said yes? Did he say yes, Kolivan?’
‘Careful, Regris, you will scare the boy,’ rumbled Antok. Then, a little hopefully, ‘Did you say yes to Kolivan’s proposition?’
Keith blinked, and looked them up and down. Antok was massive , it was easy to imagine what the rest of him would be like, and Regris was fast and toothy and could easily claw him to shreds without thinking. ‘Only if you two don’t rip me to shreds, okay?’
Regris softened his smile and said, ‘Nonono, I’ll be good, I promise. I’ll be very good. You’ll see. Hssss.’ He flickered a long, forked tongue at Keith and Keith flushed pink, suddenly picturing all the things that tongue could do.
‘You are doing us a great service,’ said Antok. ‘The greatest we could ask for. None of us would dream of hurting you.’
‘Also it’s even better that it’s you because you’re exceptionally attractive,’ Regris pointed out.
‘Regris!’ snapped Antok and Kolivan together, and Keith went beetroot red.
‘What? He is! Everyone on the base says so!’
‘You’re making him uncomfortable,’ said Kolivan. ‘I apologize for him, Keith, nobody ever taught him manners, clearly. Come, let me show you your rooms.’
Keith let himself be steered out, mumbling something about no-fine-really, and thinking, wait, rooms? As in plural?
It was not just rooms, plural, it was an entire apartment. It had a kitchen-dining room, a living room, a bedroom with a huge bed, a training room, a nursery, a spare bedroom and a massive bathroom, complete with a bath the size of a king-size bed and a shower big enough to hold several people. Kosmo teleported swiftly through all the rooms, then rematerialised on the couch - which was big enough to hold him and then some - and went to sleep.
‘I,’ said Keith, and then promptly ran out of words.
‘Do you like it?’ said Kolivan.
‘It’s… very fancy?’ said Keith, looking up through the glass roof of the bedroom at the expanse of space going by, and New Daibazaal rising in the lower right corner.
‘You don’t like it,’ said Kolivan, and he sounded bitterly disappointed.
‘No! No, it’s not that, it’s just… I grew up in a one-room shack in the desert, you know? And then I was in a care home sharing a dorm with a ton of other kids. This… this is amazing, it just… I can’t believe it’s for me. It feels… empty.’
‘Oh,’ said Kolivan. ‘The emptiness will change. There will be people here at all hours of the day, with your permission. You don’t have to go to anyone, they will gladly come to you, if you are willing - and leave you be if you are not. Nobody can be here unless you say they can.’
‘Oh.’ Keith chewed on his lip. ‘So… who’s here? I know not Ezor or Mom, cause I heard Mom say they were all going on a trip out to find some weblums.’
‘Well, aside from Antok and Regris, we have only Ulaz and Thace. Zethrid is on New Daibazaal, for negotiating purposes. She is not interested in you as an omega, if you were worried about that.’
Keith breathed a sigh of relief. ‘Yeah, OK, good. I’m not too happy with the prospect of fucking her either.’
Kolivan sat down on the edge of the bed - it gave a fair bit, and now Keith was looking down into his face. ‘You don’t have to do anything you do not wish, with anyone you don’t want. I thought I made this clear?’
‘Yeah, I… fuck. I guess I’m still kind of fucked up about Shiro,’ said Keith, sitting down and putting his face in his hands.
To his surprise, Kolivan put an arm around him and kissed the back of his neck. ‘I think you should summon Thace, he is an excellent cook who has been delighting in not being limited to vitamin-enriched protein mash any longer. He will doubtless be eager to cook for you, and then if you wish, we could help you forget.’
Keith knew he was never going to forget, but that voice, deep and a little gravelly, so close to his ear, made him think it was going to be one hell of a distraction. ‘Oh. Oh, god. Yeah, that sounds good.’ Before he could stop himself through nerves or embarrassment, he pressed Thace’s code into his wrist computer and said, ‘Thace? It’s Keith.’ Damn stupid, who else would it be, ‘If you’re not busy, could you come to. To.’
‘The omega quarters,’ said Kolivan.
‘Are you kidding, that sounds like a brothel,’ snapped Keith. ‘Just come to my apartment, Thace, you know where I am, yeah?’ When he shut off the communicator, he looked at Kolivan and said, ‘OK, this is officially Keith’s place. That’s it. Which also kind of sounds like a gay bar but that’s on my dad and his insistence on naming me after Keith Richards.’
‘I… have no idea who this Keith Richards is,’ said Kolivan.
‘Later I’m going to get hold of some Rolling Stones music so you can see. In the meantime - Kolivan, this has obviously been something you’ve been planning for a while. Why did you ask me today?’
There was a short silence - in anyone else, Keith would have thought they were embarrassed, but Kolivan was clearly immune to that kind of affliction and seemed to be merely ordering his thoughts for best effect. ‘I have been planning to ask you for some time, yes. But it seemed crass to put such a question to you so soon after the death of Princess Allura, and then you were very good at making yourself scarce - admittedly I could have summoned you, but I became a victim of my own cowardice. I could not see myself putting such a proposition to you as if it were mission orders. It seemed wrong.’
‘Really? Huh. So you waited till Shiro’s wedding reception?’
‘You looked lonely. And it struck me that it might be an idea that you would welcome. It felt like the right time.’
Keith thought about it. ‘Maybe it was,’ he said.
At that point the door chime went off, and Keith looked up. ‘That’s Thace, right?’
‘Yes,’ said Kolivan, getting up to let him in.
Keith hadn’t seen Thace in over a year, but it was a relief to set eyes on that reassuring, sensible face that somehow managed to be a little more familiar than every other Galra Keith knew. Thace smiled warmly and said, ‘Hello, Keith. Not regretting anything yet, I hope?’
‘No,’ said Keith, smiling back. ‘Still sure. It’s good to see you, I didn’t know you could cook.’
Thace laughed. ‘You hear that, Kolivan, he only wants me for my Deriban laakstew.’
‘Well, it’s very fine laakstew, Thace. Is that what the bag is for?’
‘Of course, I know there’s food in here but I don’t expect he has all the necessary ingredients in this little kitchen. Not for ammakoras, either.’
‘Wait, wait,’ said Keith, ‘The kitchen’s fully stocked already? Also what’re those things?’
‘You answer him, Kolivan, I’m going to go and make a start,’ said Thace, heading out to the kitchen. He paused as he passed Keith and dropped a kiss on his cheek, which caused Keith to startle slightly as if someone had flicked cold water in his face. Thace grimaced. ‘No?’
‘Uh. You surprised me,’ said Keith. ‘Is. Is everyone gonna be getting all touchy-feely like that?’
‘Only if you allow it,’ said Kolivan. ‘Say the word and it will stop.’
There was a pause, loaded with speculation and apprehension, and then Keith said slowly, ‘No… no, I think… it’s good. If you guys can get used to me being a bit jumpy at first. The only one who really touches me much-’
‘I understand,’ said Thace quickly. He leaned down, slow enough for Keith to be aware of his movements and stop him well in advance, and kissed him. It was nothing but a gentle brush of lip on lip, his hand passed lightly through Keith’s hair, but Keith was left watching him go through into the kitchen, and chewing lightly on his lower lip.
‘I see he’s left you unsatisfied,’ said Kolivan, clearly amused.
‘I. Uh. It was nice,’ said Keith.
‘Let’s see if I can’t sate you a little further.’ Kolivan hooked a finger under Keith’s chin and tipped his chin up - this time, Keith’s mouth was opening to the kiss as their lips met, his hands fisting in the front of Kolivan’s tunic as he gave as good as he damn well got. They both came up breathing heavily, and Kolivan pecked Keith on the forehead and said, ‘Possibly you may be insatiable - that’s good. But bad in that I can’t take you straight to bed just yet, we agreed to eat first.’
‘I can cook afterwards,’ said Thace, from the bedroom doorway. ‘Keith, what do you think? Should I come back later?’
‘No!’ said Keith sharply. ‘I mean, I- uh, wait, let me think.’ It was an incredibly hard decision, he suddenly wanted very much to call Thace in here and have him and Kolivan take him right now. But that was possibly rushing things a little. ‘OK, I think I need to eat. Thace, is there enough that we could have the others in here too? I want to get rid of the quiet. Maybe get used to having people in my space before I try… that.’
‘Oh, there’ll be plenty,’ said Thace. ‘I always make too much.’
‘We’ll do that, then.’
Kolivan nodded. ‘A very wise choice. Also you should probably let Ulaz look you over before you risk a pregnancy, in any case. He has been talking about how closely he wants to care for your wellbeing.’
A pang of warmth rose in Keith’s chest, but he just stood up. ‘Great, that’s settled. Are there any spare uniforms in here? Because I need a shower and a change of clothes - alone, Kolivan - and then if that’s OK I’d really like to come watch Thace cook?’
Thace smiled. ‘Come and join me when you’re ready,’ he said, and vanished into the kitchen again.
Kolivan went to one of the cupboards on the wall and opened it up - the contraption inside seemed to be part computer, part microwave, and he said, ‘This will produce any garment that you have in mind, through a mental interface similar to the one used at your trial - but naturally less invasive.’
Keith stared at it. ‘It’s a mind-reading clothes printer.’
‘I wouldn’t put it quite so… bluntly, but yes.’
‘Well, OK. I guess I better put it through its paces.’ He didn’t seriously think that the thing couldn’t produce hippo footie pyjamas, but he figured it would be a challenge. It didn’t turn out to be much of one - one set of hippo footie pyjamas, in pale brown fleece, with tusks on the hood and a tail and mittens that folded down over the ends of the sleeves.
‘What,’ said Kolivan, ‘Is that.’
‘You’ll see in a minute,’ said Keith, and retreated to the bathroom.
It was huge, and the shower stall was massive. Keith was quite glad to find that the walls could be adjusted to a less intimidating size. And there was actually hot water! After the sonic vibration showers at the old base, this was sheer luxury.
So here he was, and it wasn't too late to take back his decision - but if he did, what would he do then? He could stay here and just be an ordinary Blade, and he had every reason to believe that the others would still respect him if he did. He'd still have that hollow ache of loneliness, though, and the loss of purpose that he hadn't felt since Shiro had left for Kerberos.
He pictured his fellow Blades - stoic, efficient Ulaz; handsome and ever-reliable Thace; Regris of the wicked sense of humour and intriguingly fast tongue; massive, mysterious Antok. And, of course, Kolivan, every bit the leader Shiro was, someone Keith could rely on-
Fuck, he was thinking about Shiro again. Keith sighed heavily and stepped out of the spray to find his suit and communicator.
‘Kolivan? Can you… come in here, please?’
There was a short pause and the door opened - Keith had never been more aware of his body than now, standing naked in the middle of the cavernous bathroom and clutching his suit to himself.
‘Are you hurt?’ said Kolivan.
‘No, I'm fine,’ said Keith. ‘The shower’s great. I just… can't stop thinking about Shiro.’
‘Ah.’ Kolivan called out to Thace, ‘No, he's fine!’ then shut the door behind him. ‘Maybe it’s best we don't leave you alone just yet, then. May I help you with anything?’
Keith hesitated. The only person who had ever given him things - gifts, help, anything - had been Shiro. That had changed a little when he'd become a Voltron paladin, but still if anyone asked him what he needed, he never knew how to answer.
When Kolivan answered for him, it was an inexpressible relief. ‘Would you like me to wash your hair for you?’
‘Yeah,’ said Keith, relaxing suddenly. ‘That'd be nice. Thanks.’
‘Alright. And just so you know for the future, you can summon a holocomputer anywhere in your rooms no matter your state of undress. The system is remote logged to your voice and DNA signature. But also this room has wall ports by the door, the bath and in the shower.’
‘OK,’ said Keith. ‘That's handy.’
Kolivan expanded the size of the shower as though he'd done it a thousand times - of course, he'd probably built the thing - and pressed on one of the tiles. A smooth white bench slid out of a slot in the wall - Keith would have missed it entirely and now he was wondering how many other tricks that wall held. Then Kolivan started to undress and Keith had a whole host of other things on his mind.
He'd always known Kolivan was bigger than Shiro. It was one thing to know a thing was logically true, though, and another to actually see it, unwrapped of all the bulky Blade leader's robes, broad shoulders and hard muscle and scars all undeniably real under the faintly bluish bathroom light. Kolivan had left his underwear on, but even a brief glance downwards made Keith's eyes widen a little.
He looked up and caught Kolivan’s gaze - the pupilless yellow eyes made him hard to read; Shiro always wore his heart on his sleeve.
‘You look uncertain,’ said Kolivan, and all of a sudden Keith realised that Kolivan might possibly have trouble understanding him. Well, that wouldn't be new. People were always calling him opaque.
‘No,’ said Keith. He dropped the suit - he was going to have to get used to the others seeing him naked eventually - and Kolivan's little intake of breath took him off his guard. ‘What?’
‘Nothing,’ said Kolivan, sliding a hand over Keith's hip as he stepped into the shower. ‘You're so beautiful. Shiro is a fool.’
Keith shook his head and hid his face against Kolivan's chest, because he felt a shameful and rising urge to cry. ‘No, I'm the fool, I never said anything, or I did, but I, I was so scared of losing what I had, I called him brother, I probably lost him for good then. Oh, fuck. Look at this, you must think I'm so weak.’
The tears were streaming down his face, mingling with the shower water, and Keith was only peripherally aware of the strong arms wrapping around him and steering him to the bench.
Kolivan held him till he stopped sobbing, then quietly got on with soaping up the unruly black locks and rinsing them clean. When he was finally done, he said softly, ‘I do not think you weak. We all grieve. Do you remember how you got this scar?’ he ghosted his fingertips over Keith's right shoulder.
Keith sniffed and rubbed at his nose. ‘Well sure. How could I forget? Even after I went in the healing pod I had to learn new ways of using that arm.’
‘You were cut to the bone, I am not in the least surprised. All of us bear scars like that. It takes time to learn to live with them, and sometimes the pain never goes away.’
‘So this is another kind of scar, is that what you're saying?’
Kolivan smiled. ‘I admit it's not the most complex of metaphors. Would you like to show me what this thing you produced from the clothing replicator is?’
‘In a minute,’ said Keith, closing his eyes and enjoying the warm solidity of Kolivan’s shoulder against his forehead and the broad hand rubbing slow circles on his back. Finally, though, he lifted his head and said, ‘Yeah, let's go. Where do you - I mean where do I keep the towels?’
‘Anywhere you like,’ said Kolivan, shutting off the shower. ‘But we put them over here.’
He pressed his palm to a tile beside the huge sink - again, nothing about the tile distinguished it from any other as far as Keith could see - and a set of shelves slid out of the wall, laden with towels and bathrobes and slippers in all sizes, but all in white. Keith had expected Marmora blue.
Kolivan kept his back turned while he shed his soggy underwear and wrapped a towel round his waist, but that was an entirely distracting backside and Keith barely noticed when Kolivan returned to wrap a towel round his hair for him.
‘OK, fine, I'm not completely helpless,’ said Keith, looking away and snatching the towel Kolivan was offering him to scrub his skin dry. ‘Oh, god, this is not going to end with everyone treating me like some pretty princess who can't fucking stand unassisted. That is not in the contract, right?’
‘I admit it may be in a few people's fantasies, but even they would have to admit it doesn't suit the real Keith Kogane in the slightest,’ said Kolivan, lips twitching just a little.
‘Whose fantasies?’
‘That would be telling.’
‘Yours?’
‘No.’ Kolivan let him glare for a moment, then he said, ‘Later, I will tell you exactly what I would do to you. When you have eaten and seen Ulaz and we have time to kill.’
A shiver went down Keith's spine. That, he thought, would definitely be worth the wait. ‘Yeah. OK,’ he said breathlessly, and put on the hippo pyjamas.
Kolivan stared. ‘Keith. Is that. Is that some kind of costume? Is this a… What is the word, a, a, a kink? Do humans find this kind of thing sexy?’
Keith burst out laughing. ‘What? No! It's supposed to be comfortable.’ He flipped the hood up and over his head - it was just the right kind of too big, and the tusks hung down into his field of vision.
‘You… dress as an animal to be comfortable?’
‘Well, you don't have to. It'd be cosy without being a hippo. But I like hippos and of course it looks stupid, but that means everything is more stupid, including all my troubles.’
‘Therapeutic mockery, I see,’ said Kolivan. ‘You should show Thace, I am sure he will be impressed.’
‘Got it. See you in a minute.’ Keith pushed his hood back and stood on his tiptoes to kiss Kolivan, then wandered out into the apartment feeling much more at peace with himself than he had before.
When Keith wandered into the kitchen, Thace looked up, snorted and shook his head. ‘You and your human customs, I can tell it will be an adventure learning all about them.’
Keith grinned. ‘Kolivan said you’d like it.’
‘It’s… a spectacle.’
Suddenly, there was the pop of displaced air and Kosmo appeared in the kitchen, knocking Keith sideways and sniffing the air. Thace frowned and came around the counter to defend his ingredients. ‘No! I told you, you cannot be in here! Keith, can you make him obey you? This is the third time.’
‘I dunno, Thace, he’s his own wolf, but I can try. Kosmo, go play outside, you ate already, I’ll bring you more later.’ Kosmo whined and pushed his head against Keith’s shoulder. Keith rubbed his mane. ‘I don’t know what to tell you, if you’re in the kitchen you’re in Thace’s way and you’re even less likely to get food. You need to make him like you. Go do a perimeter check for me, you know I can’t do that.’
Kosmo whined, but vanished. Keith looked back up at Thace, who was looking frankly astonished. ‘Can you… read that creature’s mind?’
‘Of course not,’ said Keith. ‘We just understand each other.’ He climbed up on one of the chairs that surrounded the kitchen table and asked, ‘So what are you making? Can I help?’
Thace looked him over. ‘You just showered so I suppose I won't make you wash your hands,’ he said, pushing a knife and a chopping board loaded with dark meat at Keith. ‘Cut that into cubes about this big. It’s prime Deriban laak steak, the real thing. Nobody has been able to get this for over three hundred decaphoebs because of the barricades.’
‘And a laak is like… a cow or something?’
‘I'm not sure.’ Thace thought about it. ‘I'd have to experience more Earth aquatic ungulates to know.’
‘OK, I don't think we have any of those,’ said Keith.
‘No? Are you sure? I thought I’d heard the blue paladin mention sea cows, aren’t they related to land cows?’
Keith laughed. ‘No, they’re just a victim of this weird thing humans do sometimes where if we see something and we don’t know what it is we name it after the nearest familiar thing. The actual name for those things is manatees, they’re, like, seals and walruses? You know?’
Thace paused thoughtfully, scraping the pile of chopped unidentifiable vegetable into a pot. ‘I’m afraid I don’t. You should tell me later. I can see getting to know you better is going to be an education - Ulaz is certainly looking forward to it.’ There was a gentle chime from the doorway. ‘Oh, that should be him now.’
‘Speak of the devil.’
‘What?’ said Thace, alarmed.
‘Oh, nothing. Uh, I’ll be right back.’ Keith pushed back his chair and went to open the door - and yes, the visitor was Ulaz, and Regris and Antok as well. Keith blinked and stepped back to let them in.
‘Hello, Keith,’ said Ulaz, a little taken aback. ‘...What are you wearing? Is this some sort of human mating custom?’
Keith rolled his eyes. ‘No, it’s just dumb comfy novelty hippo pyjamas. You know, sleepwear? Only intentionally stupid? If you want to know the origin of it then ask Lance, he probably knows.’
‘I… will do that,’ said Ulaz. ‘It sounds fascinating.’
Regris cackled. ‘Look out, you've got Doctor Ulaz all interested. He'll want to investigate you now. Oh, by the way, that thing is amazing. Can I have one?’
‘Don't be silly, Regris, I was interested in Keith anyway,’ said Ulaz dryly, but a thrill went up Keith's spine at the thought nonetheless.
He covered it by turning to Regris and saying, ‘You can totally have one. Do you want to be a crocodile instead?’
There was a short, doubtful pause. ‘What’s a crocodile?’
‘Big earth reptile. Toothy. Most importantly, has a good big tail like yours.’
‘Oh!’ Regris brightened up. ‘Yeah, absolutely, that sounds like my kind of animal.’
‘Alright, but it’s gonna have to wait a minute. Hi, Antok, you’re being very quiet.’
Antok, as much as anyone could tell from behind the mask, seemed a little taken aback. ‘I… did not know I was expected to say anything,’ he said.
Oh god, thought Keith, he’s actually shy. How can he possibly be shy because of me? Also fuck he’s like twice my size, that’s terrifying, I’m gonna rupture something… He squashed that thought and said, ‘Well… “expected” is a bit strong, but “hello” would be nice?’
‘Hello, Keith,’ said Antok dutifully, and Keith almost laughed.
He was very grateful when Regris broke the tension. ‘OK well, this is all very nice, everyone circling around like very polite sharks, but if nobody minds?’ Before Keith could do much about it, he found himself tilted back in Regris’s arms, looking up into the alarmingly toothy smile. ‘Do you mind?’
‘Oh fuck,’ said Keith. His eyes flicked between the teeth, and then up to Regris’s eyes - Regris was the only one of the male Galra who had pupils, and they were jagged slits like a gecko’s. As he watched they expanded a little to watch him. ‘Um. Uh, OK, sure, just please don’t bite me.’
‘Wouldn’t dream of it,’ said Regris, and kissed him - after a second Keith knew he was stupid to think he’d be bitten accidentally. Regris had had these fangs all his life and knew how to keep them in check. The forked tongue, though - the instant he felt it against his own he gasped and pressed closer, and Regris chuckled into his mouth and kissed deeper, eventually breaking away and pecking Keith on the end of his nose. ‘You’ve gone pink,’ he said. ‘That’s so pretty.’
‘Oh fuck, don’t call me that,’ said Keith, aware he was panting a little. ‘Holy fuck, Regris, that… I could get addicted to that.’
‘Glad to hear it.’
‘But not right now.’ Keith patted Regris on the shoulder. ‘No fucking before dinner. Let me up, please?’
‘Aw. Right.’ Regris laughed and set Keith upright, and Keith was very aware of Ulaz and Antok watching him, and the fact that Kolivan had come in from the bathroom - and had changed at some point, although when he’d got the loose black top and soft pants he’d changed into was something of a mystery. Maybe there was loungewear stashed in the depths of the bathroom walls, too.
Either way, Keith had never seen Kolivan dress so casually, and it was a shock - the top clung to his frame and just revealed his collarbone, and he wasn’t wearing shoes, only white tabi socks. The whole thing was oddly, almost effortlessly, attractive. He didn’t realise he was staring until Kolivan coughed awkwardly and said, ‘I’m sorry, I’m making you uncomfortable. I didn’t realise this was some kind of taboo in human culture.’
‘No!’ said Keith. ‘No, no, you’re good! You’re… great, it’s fine, I just… I’ve never seen you dress down before. That’s all. It, uh, it suits you, Kolivan.’
Kolivan smiled - a quirk of his mouth, up and gone again - but he was plucking a little at the neckline of his top. ‘I’m… glad you think so.’
‘He’s right, leader, it does suit you,’ said Antok, and Kolivan visibly relaxed.
‘It would suit you too,’ he said, with a defiant little lift of his chin. That was interesting - not only were both Kolivan and Antok clearly nervous, but they were definitely more comfortable flirting with one another than they were with Keith. He looked between them and wondered how that would play out when he got them both in bed together, and then immediately dismissed that mental image before he made even more of an idiot out of himself.
‘Maybe next time,’ said Antok.
‘Hm. Did you bring the gift?’
Gift? Keith was about to start protesting about how he was being treated like royalty already, when Antok said, ‘It’s not exactly what you’d call a gift, Kolivan. But yes, I have it. Should we all go and sit down so that I can present it?’
And then everyone was looking at Keith. Keith looked from one face to another but they were all equally unhelpful, until Thace called out from the kitchen, ‘If you give it to him where I can’t see I will personally end each and every one of you. Come in here, and one of you give me a hand with these ammakoras.’
They filed into the kitchen and Keith was hit by a wall of delicious, spicy-meaty scent that made him hungry all the way down to his feet, if that were possible. Thace was standing at the counter rolling out a dark red dough and occasionally stirring one of two pots from which the savoury smells were arising, and he grinned at Keith when he came in.
‘Sit down, Keith. We’re nearly done. Ulaz, help me here.’
Ulaz sighed heavily but he didn’t protest, only rolled up his sleeves, washed his hands and started stuffing the dough with some kind of vegetable mixture from one of the pans, pinching the result shut with his fingertips and dropping them straight into the other pan.
‘Are you guys making dumplings?’ said Keith, sitting down between Kolivan and Regris, with Antok on Kolivan’s other side.
These short, mildly baffled pauses were getting very familiar. Eventually Thace said, ‘Well, I guess every culture has its own version of “stuff wrapped in dough”, so I suppose so? These are called ammakoras, they’re from Cybrachia. Traditionally - or at least the last time Deribis was in contact with the rest of the universe - you had kensa bread with laakstew but it turns out the kensa plant is extinct now and I’m not sure what the replacement is, so I had to improvise. I think it tastes pretty good, though.’
‘It smells amazing.’
Thace beamed. ‘Good! That’s a good sign.’
‘Now we’re all here,’ said Kolivan, ‘Antok, you have Keith’s gift?’
‘Of course,’ rumbled Antok and placed something about the size of his fist on the table. For a moment Keith wondered where he’d been keeping it - Antok had huge fists - and then he picked it up and his confusion grew even more. It was a rock.
It was a lump of gunmetal black ore that flashed under the lights when he tilted it, and when he turned it a certain way it had an odd bluish sheen. He pulled his onesie mittens off, suddenly certain that it was important to touch it with his skin - a pulse of something went through him, something familiar, that he’d only felt in one place before.
‘Kolivan,’ he said, voice shaking a little. ‘Is… is this… no way, this can’t possibly be…’ He laughed incredulously. ‘It’s… it’s a lump of actual real-life luxite ore. No way.’
‘Why wouldn’t it be possible?’ said Kolivan. ‘Daibazaal is returned to us. We have access to luxite once more. We would otherwise have given you the blade of one of our fallen to replace your own but now, in this bright new world, you have the opportunity to shape your own blade.’
‘I… how? Do I just hold it out and zap?’ Keith held the rock in front of him. Nothing happened.
‘Not quite. Don’t worry, we do not intend to put you through a second trial. But you must reach inside yourself and find the true shape of your blade, without holding back, or it cannot truly connect with your soul.’
‘Sounds familiar,’ said Keith. ‘OK, this isn’t my first rodeo, I can do this.’
Ulaz and Thace exchanged glances.
‘Exactly how many is an adequate number of rodeos?’ said Thace.
‘What is a rodeo?’ asked Ulaz.
‘Three,’ replied Keith firmly, ignoring Ulaz’s question in favour of going out to the bedroom and putting the lump of luxite ore on a shelf by the bed.
‘That seems like a low number of rodeos,’ said Antok when he returned.
‘Well, trust me, it’s not.’ Keith was trying his hardest to keep a straight face, especially since he would have been completely unable to explain the joke, so he changed the subject. ‘So, uh. This… assignment. Mission.’
‘Position,’ said Kolivan. ‘It has a title in Galran but it turned out to have… unfortunate connotations in English so I feel it’s probably best not to bestow it on you.’
‘Oh, god, what’s the title?’ asked Keith, fearing the worst.
‘Breeder of Marmora, would be the closest approximate translation, said Kolivan, grimacing slightly. Keith’s expression showed exactly what he thought of that . ‘Yes, I thought you might have a low opinion of it, although in the original Galran it has a much more respectable tone. So we collectively decided on a new title for the post, if you approve.’
‘I’m listening,’ said Keith.
‘There were a lot of ideas,’ said Thace, washing his hands and sitting down in the seat closest to the stove. ‘“Hope of the Future” was tossed around for a bit and then we agreed you’d probably think that was too fanciful.’
‘Oh god, you thought right, I'm not some chosen one out of a story.’
‘We did choose you,’ Kolivan pointed out.
‘Moving on,’ said Ulaz. ‘“Pack Mother” is technically biologically accurate - yes, I see by your face that is not a thought you like.’
‘I’m a guy, Ulaz. I’m going to be a father, OK? Let’s get that 100% crystal clear. Everyone understand that? My children will call me Dad.’
‘Understood,’ said Kolivan. ‘It is, of course, up to you. And so after much deliberation, we decided to offer you the title of Commandant.’
‘Commandant?’ said Keith, who hadn’t been expecting that.
Kolivan nodded. ‘It’s a rank name that we haven’t used much up to now. You would have, with complications, equal rank to Ulaz and outrank everyone but Krolia, Antok and myself, except here in your rooms, where your word is law.’
‘I’m… I’m an officer?’
‘I did tell you it was a very important job.’
‘So wait, what’s Ulaz?’
‘I’m Chief Medical Officer,’ said Ulaz. ‘If Kolivan, Antok and Krolia were all off base I'd be in charge. As far as the kits and their upbringing is concerned, you have absolute power over every decision unless I believe you are putting their health in danger, and even then, I would have to go through certain procedures to override you. That’s going to get more and more important the older they get, of course.’
‘The main implication is that you will one day inherit the title of Blade Leader,’ said Kolivan.
Before Keith had really processed that, Thace said brightly, ‘OK everyone, dinner’s ready. Antok, get me some bowls, please? Oh, and cutlery.’
‘You note that although I outrank him, he barks out orders like a General if he’s been cooking,’ said Antok, getting to his feet nonetheless.
‘The cook’s in charge, that’s the only way you get the meal to the table in time,’ replied Thace absently. He served to Keith first, and then to Kolivan, Antok, Ulaz, Regris and then himself, in that order, before putting the covered pan back on the counter and returning with a pitcher of something clear and vaguely orange-coloured and a stack of cups. ‘Here, I’m not going to serve you all your drinks too, you have hands.’
‘What is it?’ said Keith as Antok poured him a cupful of what looked a lot like peach soda. He took a cautious sip and coughed. It was not peach soda.
‘It’s hrak’mor,’ said Kolivan. ‘Is it too strong? It can be diluted. I don’t want you to think we are trying to get you drunk.’
‘Uh, no, it’s fine,’ said Keith. He could probably do with a bit of Dutch Courage at any rate. ‘It just looks like an Earth drink. A much sweeter Earth drink.’ He glanced at Antok, who still hadn't taken off his mask. ‘Can you eat through that?’
‘Of course,’ said Antok, taking a mouthful of hrak’mor to prove it. It passed through as if the mask was mist. Keith did his level best to hide his disappointment, and picked up the odd alien eating utensils -something like short chopsticks with flattened, dished ends.
‘Have you used these before?’ said Thace. ‘I'm sorry, I didn't think, I can get you a spoon?’
‘No, I'm fine,’ said Keith sliding them into his hand the way Shiro had taught him. ‘I was just thinking how much they look like coffee stirrers.’ He picked up a dumpling and took a bite - and immediately went for his cup. ‘Holy shit that's hot. Fuck.’
‘Thace, I told you,’ said Antok. ‘I told you to leave out the sa’ain. Humans aren't built to take Cybrachian spices.’
‘He’s half galra, and anyway have you seen what humans eat?’ said Thace. ‘Keith, I’m so sorry, if it's too much I can get you some-’
‘Thace, dhugn is poisonous to humans in even tiny amounts,’ said Ulaz.
‘Cream cheese, is what I was going to say. Ulaz, what do you take me for?’
Keith looked despairingly around the table. Regris, who was stuffing his face, smirked and rolled his eyes, and Kolivan simply shrugged and gestured towards the steadily escalating argument.
My rooms, my rule, huh? Well, let’s see… thought Keith, and he stood up and slapped his hands on the table.
‘Alright, enough! Jesus, you might have asked me whether it was too much? Yes, I'm half-human, we eat toxic levels of capsaicin for fun. This is nowhere near that time I ate an entire ghost pepper when I was fourteen.’ To prove a point, he shoved another dumpling in his mouth and sat down, chewing on it with every sign of delight. ‘Thace, it's delicious.’
Ulaz, who had been tapping on his tablet, said slowly, ‘Why would you eat an entire ghost pepper? It says here it's the hottest pepper in the world.’
‘You do a lot of stupid things to win a bet when you're a teenage idiot,’ replied Keith, leaning over and deactivating Ulaz's tablet. ‘No tablets at my dinner table, damn, now I see why it made Colleen Holt so mad.’
‘Ancestors, thankyou!’ said Thace. ‘I've been wanting to say that to him for years.’
‘I think we all have,’ said Kolivan, amused.
‘You say that like you're not twice as bad, Leader Paperwork,’ said Regris.
‘Yeah, well, I'm the only one allowed to have a tablet at my dinner table,’ said Keith. ‘If you wanna look something up, let me know and I'll do it.’
‘I can see you will be a hard taskmaster,’ said Antok, and something in his tone made Keith look up.
‘You like that idea? I wouldn't have expected that from you.’
‘I’m sure we will learn several unexpected things of each other in the coming months,’ replied Antok, and Regris ooooh’ ed playfully at him - Keith was suddenly very thankful for Regris and his irreverent skill at breaking tension.
The meal continued to a background melody of quiet chatter, interrupted every so often by the odd awkward pause to betray that nobody here was as relaxed as they were pretending, and the other pauses when Keith said something that nobody else understood and they all took a moment to work out what the hell he was talking about. By the end of dinner, after a lot more hrak’mor and a decision that Earth idioms just straight-up didn’t have to make any sense, things were getting noticeably more relaxed.
Thace delegated Antok to clear the table, so now Keith was sitting sideways in his chair, leaning on Kolivan’s shoulder with his feet propped up in Regris’s lap.
‘So I still don't get how this is gonna go down,’ he said, in the middle of a conversation about hoverbikes. ‘Am I supposed to fuck all of you at the same time or, like, taking turns? I mean I'm not a virgin but I'm not exactly Don Joo-arn. I've never done a threesome before, let alone an orgy. What.’
Everyone was staring at him, except for Regris, who was desperately trying not to laugh, and Ulaz, who had snorted hrak’mor out of his nose.
Thace smacked Ulaz on the back a couple of times and said, as reassuringly as he could manage, ‘It's up to you, Keith. Take your time. Regris, if you can't stop making those ridiculous snorting noises go outside.’
Ulaz, who had recovered from having his sinuses filled with alcohol, pulled a scanner out of his pocket and waved it over Keith. ‘You seem to be in perfect health,’ he said, his voice a little hoarse. ‘Aside from being very drunk. So you may begin when you please, although personally, I recommend you sleep it off first.’
‘Mm, that sounds nice,’ said Keith. ‘It’s been kinda a long day. Thanks for coming, everybody.’
‘I still think one of us should stay with you,’ said Kolivan. ‘It is your choice, of course, and you may call any of us if you need us, but-’
‘No!’ Keith turned and threw his arms around Kolivan's waist. ‘You stay. Tomorrow… I dunno, we can think about this some more. Everybody kiss goodnight. Specially you, Regris.’
Regris chuckled and leaned over to give Keith a long tender kiss. Keith sat up to receive it, stroking over the tactile scales on either side of his head, and then Regris broke away and said softly, ‘Sleep well, Keith. Good to have you here.’
Ulaz turned out to be a careful, methodical kisser and to Keith's disappointment, Antok didn't remove his mask, only pulled him close and wished him pleasant dreams.
‘No kiss?’ said Keith wistfully.
‘Not tonight,’ said Antok. ‘Major, I have disappointed him, will you make up for my shortfall?’
‘I can try,’ said Thace. ‘Especially since I left him wanting earlier.’
This kiss was not the careful affair from before - now, Thace wrapped Keith in his arms and left him gasping. ‘Better? Good. Sleep well, Keith.’
And then, all at once, they were all gone, leaving only Kolivan behind.
After the activity of the meal, everything seemed silent once more. The light and colour seemed to drain out of the apartment, and once again it was big and empty and too much for just Keith. He pulled the hood of the stupid hippo onesie off his head and looked up into the star-studded darkness, half expecting to see the black lion or the Atlas and cursing himself because he knew both were equally impossible.
Kolivan stepped into his peripheral vision, looked up into the sky and then back down into Keith’s face. ‘You look like you did before I brought you here.’
‘I… yeah.’ Keith looked at the bed. It was massive. Too big for him, too big for him and Kolivan. He found himself having to force himself not to think about what Shiro’s bed was like, or whether Curtis made him happy in it - all at once the pleasant warm aftertaste of Thace’s cooking vanished, leaving him cold.
‘You’re thinking of him again, aren’t you,’ said Kolivan. Keith nodded, and Kolivan drew him in - he didn’t resist, just let himself be held. It helped, it really did. ‘Come to bed. I will not leave you, and nothing else is expected of you tonight.’
Keith let himself be led to the bed - Kosmo followed, and although Kolivan raised an eyebrow, he left it alone when Keith did, and Keith fell asleep with his face buried in Kosmo’s mane and Kolivan’s steady breathing against the back of his neck.
He slept deeply, and didn’t dream.
(Also this picture of Kolivan marvelling at the marvellous hippo onesie is by Diococky!)
Chapter 2: Performance Issues
Summary:
In which Keith's Issues become Issues, several people join the queue for a piece of James Griffin's hide, Keith learns about scenting, Krolia is Mom, and Dad's mac n cheese is the best in the universe.
WARNING: OK there is a trans slur used in Keith's history in this chapter, if you get triggered by this, here is your caution tape, as it were.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
When Keith woke the next day it took a while to work out exactly where he was and why, and then the events of the previous day slotted into place. He was here in his own beautiful set of rooms in the New Daibazaal base, he had a new title which came with the expectation to have- oh.
He looked down. He’d turned over in his sleep so that now he had his head pillowed firmly against Kolivan’s chest, and there was a muscular, purple-toned arm draped loosely around his hip. It was nice. They hadn’t undressed to sleep, so Keith was still wearing the hippo onesie and Kolivan was still wearing the bewilderingly un-Kolivan-like loose black top that showed his collarbones in a way that was probably entirely deliberate. He was still fast asleep, his face relaxed, and he seemed almost younger. Certainly less like he had the fate of the universe on his shoulders.
Keith was going to have this man’s child. And the children of four other men, too, if he could handle it. No pressure. He only just stopped himself from snorting. Of course there was pressure. There was so much pressure, and so many doubts, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t going to do it, because it would be worth it.
‘I hope you’re fucking happy, Shiro,’ he murmured, and then wished he hadn’t. He should just pretend Shiro had never existed, it was safer.
Kolivan snorted, opened his eyes and focussed on Keith - the split-second’s calibration was impressive, much faster than Keith’s, who decided he’d have to get Kolivan to teach him how to do that. Not now, though. Now, Keith gave him a lop-sided smile and said, ‘Hey. Morning. At least, I think so?’ He looked up. The glass roof was darkened, and almost none of the glare from Daibazaal’s star was coming through. ‘Yeah. Morning. Sleep well?’
‘I did,’ said Kolivan. ‘And you?’
‘Yeah. Much better than I thought I would. Thanks.’
Kolivan smiled. He was smiling a lot more often, now the war was over, and although it sometimes made it seem like he was having a private joke somewhere inside his head, it was still good to see. ‘It was my pleasure. It seems the animal costume is in fact good for your comfort after all.’
Keith laughed. ‘You find this thing completely incomprehensible, don’t you?’
‘I do, as with many of the things you say and do. But it is part of your charm. The thought that I will be learning about you and your ways for a long time yet is an adventure of its own, and one where nobody need get hurt at all. That’s… very new, to me.’
‘Yeah,’ said Keith softly. ‘Same. I’ve never had this many people so… invested in me before.’
‘Not even as the Black Paladin?’
‘That’s different. They needed the Black Paladin, not me. There were other Black Paladins. Hell, Allura played me in the Voltron Show and nobody even noticed. The only person I’ve ever been this important to was-’ He stopped, unable to say the name.
Kolivan waited a short moment, then cradled him close. ‘Keith, it is likely that you will not want to hear this, but you are certainly still important to him. I understand if you are bitter and you should grieve, but you should also look to the future and move on, and when you are ready, contact him.’
‘I’m not bitter,’ said Keith, muffled against the curve of Kolivan’s neck. ‘...Maybe a bit bitter. I’ll get over it. I don’t wanna talk about it.’
‘Well, then, we should certainly change the subject. You seemed surprised by the storage arrangements last night, I could show you around?’
Keith sighed irritably, winding Kolivan's braid around his hand. ‘You're stalling. Why are you stalling? I thought I would be the hesitant one. It seems like the only one who isn't shy at all is Regris.’
Kolivan turned back the ridiculous hippo hood and combed his fingers through Keith's hair. ‘I didn't want to make you feel rushed,’ he said.
‘Yeah well I feel like you think I'm fragile.’
To Keith's surprise, Kolivan actually laughed. ‘Fragile? You? No, you are your mother's son in that respect - small, yes, but full of strength and drive and I truly pitied the Blades that stood between you and your goal on the day of your trial.’
‘Yeah, well… you said you’d tell me what you wanted to do with me.’
Kolivan hesitated. ‘I think… later. When you are settled in a little more.’
‘Seriously?’ Keith sat up. ‘Are you worried about pressuring me or hurting me or something? Kolivan, seriously, look at me, I can take anything you can dish out.’
Kolivan reached out and caught his hand. ‘Keith. I have no doubt in you.’
‘You’re afraid of what I’ll think of you.’ said Keith, folding his other hand over the top of Kolivan’s. Kolivan said nothing. ‘Huh. That’s… new.’ The silence seemed to go on forever, punctuated only by the sound of their breathing and Kosmo’s doggy snores. ‘So am I right in thinking that the others won’t come in here unless I call them?’
‘That would be correct.’
‘So I’m gonna go find something to feed Kosmo, then I’m gonna come back and then do you wanna explore a bit, have some fun, and maybe when we’re done call everyone back in here for lunch?’
‘That sounds like a wonderful plan.’
‘You have to come with me and explain how to make the kitchen actually produce food.’
Kolivan groaned, but he laughed as well. ‘Antok is right, you are a hard taskmaster.’
‘Damn right. Kosmo, wake up, buddy!’
Kosmo woke up with a yip and the three of them headed to the kitchen - it turned out that the cooking facilities were mostly there to indulge Thace, and that there was a culinary equivalent of the clothing printer mounted on one of the counters.
‘So wait,’ said Keith, taking what appeared to be several pounds of prime steak out of a mind-reading food generator. ‘Am I right in thinking you could basically solve hunger with this thing? Yeah, here you go, Kosmo, take it outside, good boy.’
Kolivan watched Kosmo vanish before he replied. ‘Not exactly. The device is in fact fed with protein blocks and supplemented heavily with the real thing - what you just gave your wolf was about fifty per cent protein, thirty per cent tornei meat - tornei is about the nearest thing we can get to beef this far from Earth - twenty per cent lab grown meat. With additional flavourings, vitamins and colourings, of course. But your wolf should enjoy it just the same.’
‘Woah. So… is it expensive when I do that?’
‘Not particularly. If you would refrain from requesting too much metal or precious gems from the clothes printer it would be appreciated, however.’ Kolivan gave him a small smile, a quirk of one side of his mouth, and Keith smiled back.
‘Damn, there goes my ruby-studded suit of gold-plated medieval armour. Oh, well, you win some you lose some. That was a joke.’
‘Yes, I could tell.’ Kolivan had been smiling now for a whole three minutes. Keith counted that as a triumph. ‘Also while we are here I should point out the other generator.’
The other generator was also in the bedroom. It generated, apparently, anything Keith wanted, as long as it fit in a box thirty inches on a side. Kolivan produced a small bedside lamp just to show him how it worked, and Keith’s mind instantly filled with possibilities.
‘Oh my god,’ he said. ‘The things I could do with this. Fuck.’ He looked around his bedroom and smiled, a real, big smile, eyes sparking for the first time since he’d come here. ‘Oh, damn, this is fancy, but with this… I can make it nice.’
Kolivan stood back and folded his arms. ‘Should I leave you to decorate? Or would you like some help?’
‘What?’ Keith focussed. ‘No! We had a plan. We still have a plan, and these rooms will still be ready and waiting afterwards.’ He let the generator scan his head and pulled out a nondescript tube, then turned and walked straight into Kolivan’s arms. ‘Did you deliberately wear that top to make me think you look hot?’
Kolivan grinned. ‘Maybe a little. It is very comfortable, and I am told it shows my neck well.’
‘Oh, yeah? By who? By Antok?’
‘Never you mind.’
‘Antok’s right, it does,’ said Keith, satisfied. He leaned in and nibbled the juncture of shoulder and neck, just the tiniest hint of teeth, and Kolivan gasped and bucked suddenly against him. ‘Holy shit! Kolivan, you OK? I barely touched you!’
‘More than “OK”,’ said Kolivan, who was definitely breathing heavily. ‘Have you never- Keith, has nobody ever scented you? Or touched your neck?’
Keith shook his head, baffled, his confusion increasing when Kolivan looked at him like he’d just said nobody had ever said anything nice to him in his entire life.
‘Alright, take off that bizarre confection you are wearing, we must remedy this immediately. Ancestors, it’s a good thing Thace isn’t here or he’d keep you here for the next movement at least!’
‘Maybe I don’t have the same erogenous zones you guys do?’ said Keith, climbing out of the hippo onesie. Without it he was naked, and felt very vulnerable, sitting in just his skin on the edge of the massive bed.
But Kolivan stripped too - Keith caught a glimpse of what he was packing and swallowed hard - and steered them both to sit in the pile of pillows, so that Keith was straddling his lap, cradled against his chest.
‘Is this alright?’ he asked, smoothing a hand up and down Keith’s back.
Keith rested his forehead in the crook of Kolivan’s shoulder and caught his breath. This is it. Here we go. It doesn’t matter that your only sexual experience so far was that one terrible heat with James Griffin, you’re here now and it’s already better on balance. Breathe, Keith, it will be fine. Eventually, his breaths evened out and his heart stopped hammering. ‘Yeah,’ he said. ‘Yeah, I’m good. This is fine. Everything’s great. Yow, you’re packing some heat there, aha.’
‘...Pardon me?’
Keith reached between them and let his fingertips brush Kolivan’s cock. Oh my god it has ridges. And little lumps. It looks like a Bad Dragon sex toy, is that a knot? I’m going to die.
‘This. It’s… it’s huge. And here was me thinking Antok was going to be the problem, do all galra have massive horse dicks or something?’
‘Oh. Oh, I see - you are worried it will hurt you?’
‘I’m kind of scared I’m going to get split in half.’
For a moment Keith thought Kolivan would kiss him, but then he put his face against his neck, just behind his ear, and breathed in - and all of the panic and tension released itself at once. He was still concerned, but it wasn’t pulling him up into an anxious fight-flight response anymore, he could think clearly, Kolivan was here, everything was right with the universe.
Scenting. Right.
He put his arms around Kolivan and let himself sink into the safe golden cloud that had formed around his mind. ‘That’s not gonna happen? I was probably stupid to have worried, right?’
‘It was a perfectly logical worry, given your smaller human average size,’ said Kolivan, and Keith just tipped his head to the side because Kolivan’s lips moving against his throat felt so good, and the deep, gravelly rumble was the most soothing sound he’d ever heard. ‘But you are galra. You are not built the same.’
‘Pff, yeah,’ said Keith softly. ‘The last person I had sex with said I was a freak.’
Kolivan went still. ‘He… what?’
Keith felt him tense and said, ‘Nothing. It’s nothing.’
‘No, Keith, it's not - he mistreated you and you brush it off as if that kind of thing should be allowed.’
‘Allowed? No, I'm saying it's nothing because it was ages ago and I already kicked his ass for it. Now drop it.’ It was the longest, ugliest silence yet. Finally Keith got desperate. ‘You said I'm the leader in these rooms, right? Do I actually have to pull rank on you?’
Kolivan chuckled. ‘I can see Commandant was the correct title for you.’
‘Yeah, now come on, you were gonna teach me about this scenting thing.’ Even without pupils Keith could see the doubt in Kolivan’s eyes, so he huffed impatiently and licked a broad stripe up over the pulse point. For a moment he was worried it might be missing, but there it was, exactly where he expected to find it, a strong, steady beat against his tongue. He sucked the skin there lightly between his lips and was gratified when Kolivan immediately groaned and arched a little against him.
‘You clearly do not need much teaching,’ he said, and returned the gesture, fangs pointy and just grazing Keith’s skin, and his hot breath sending heat down every nerve.
Keith pulled him tighter with a hiss. ‘Oh my god. Do that again, harder.’ Kolivan obliged, letting his fangs press more firmly against the skin, and it was delicious but still not enough. ‘Harder. Fucking bite me, Kolivan. I wanna see my blood on your lips.’
When Kolivan did not bite him, it occurred to Keith that he might have said too much, too soon. Yeah, the expression on the Blade commander’s face was definitely not one of someone who was comfortable with what had just been requested.
‘Keith,’ said Kolivan eventually, ‘are you trying to hurt yourself? Or make me hurt you?’
‘What?’ Keith retreated instantly, pulling a pillow into his arms for whatever defense it offered. ‘Of course I’m not. Why the hell would you think that? I just think your fangs are hot, is all. So I have a shitty human kink, what’s the problem?’
Kolivan narrowed his eyes at him. ‘The problem - leaving aside the question of whether or not you are telling me the truth, which I suspect you are not - is that it is unfair to attempt to coerce your partner into harming you, at least not without discussing it first.’
‘Seriously?’ said Keith, and immediately regretted it.
Kolivan looked absolutely stunned. ‘Really? Keith, I know you do not wish me to ask about your previous sexual encounters and I will not, but-’
‘Good, don’t. And it was encounter singular. Anyway, we’re not gonna fucking talk about that - what I want to know is, do you actually take me seriously at all? Like as an adult who can make his own decisions? Because it doesn’t feel like it right now!’ Keith was starting to feel unreasonably angry - how dare Griffin get in the way of this, even from all the way back in the past. But James Griffin wasn’t here to get punched, so he was going to have to take his frustration out on Kolivan.
‘Yes, I do,’ said Kolivan (oh god, how dare he sound so reasonable and patient). ‘But I am starting to wonder if you knew what you were getting into when you accepted my offer.’
‘Of course I didn’t know!’ Keith hadn’t meant to shout, but it was too late. He turned his face away and clutched the pillow tighter. ‘I mean. I knew the basic premise, what you told me. But how could I possibly have really known? I mean fucking hell, Kolivan, you said I could get away from that mess on Earth and have a purpose again, so why should I have expected all this stupid tiptoeing around? I’m not fragile and I don’t need to be put on some kind of pedestal.’
If only Kolivan would stop watching him like that. Like he pitied him. Keith almost hated him for it.
‘Do you trust us?’
‘You expect me to just bare my soul to you just like that? No, you know what, this conversation is over, if you’re not going to fuck me now you’d better just get out.’
Keith didn’t look up. He didn’t want to see the expression on Kolivan’s face as the yawning maw of the silence stretched on and on. Eventually Kolivan sighed and got off the bed, heading to the clothes printer.
‘I can see that there is going to be a great deal to process,’ he said quietly. ‘Would you like me to send your mother here? She returned late last night.’
A strong yearning rose in Keith’s chest - something he didn’t remember feeling since he was a child, but now he really, really wanted his mom - and he nodded. ‘Yeah. Yes, please. Thanks.’
A pile of fabric dropped down on the bed beside him. ‘Here is your new uniform. You should probably dress before she arrives, whether you wear this is, of course, entirely up to you. I… Goodbye, Keith.’
‘See you later, Kolivan.’
Keith didn’t look up. There was nothing for a few beats, then Kolivan turned around and left.
After a minute or so, Keith uncurled and inspected the new uniform. It had a similar cut to the Blade officer’s uniform, with the tunic and undersuit, but with some significant differences - the wide, shallow neckline, short hooded cloak, the fact that the tunic was apparently more flexible over the chest and cut to the hip on either side, so that it fell to the knee in the front and back. The part of Keith that still thought the job description was for some kind of concubine had been expecting something a lot more revealing - once he was dressed in this he faced himself in the mirror and there he was: a Blade of Marmora. He pulled up his mask, and thought that anybody who didn’t know about his job would think him no different from any of the others. Some kind of infiltration specialist, maybe.
The door chimed and he turned around, pulling the mask down. ‘Come in!’
It was, of course, Krolia, but that didn’t register at first because Kosmo bounded in ahead of her and jumped up to wash his face thoroughly. Wolf discipline aside, Keith let him do it. Sometimes you needed doggo hugs.
‘Kosmo, get down,’ said Krolia. ‘Let me see him - you’re spoiling his lovely new uniform, get down boy - good boy.’ Eventually, Kosmo was persuaded to back off, and Krolia looked Keith up and down, then pulled him in for a crushing hug. ‘You look incredible,’ she said. ‘I’m so proud.’
‘Hi Mom,’ said Keith, returning the hug as hard as he could. ‘Kolivan said it was your idea.’
‘Yeah, I failed one child already, I would be so bad at it. You, though - you’re so much like your father. You’ll be so perfect for the job.’
Keith buried his face in her shoulder and tried not to cry. ‘I think I might have failed already, Mom. Didn’t Kolivan tell you?’
‘He said you’d had a fight and you needed to talk to me. So how about you go and sit on the couch with Kosmo, I’ll bring you some mac n cheese like your dad used to make, and we can talk about it?’
Keith made a needing little moan. ‘Oh my god, I haven’t had proper mac n cheese since Dad died. The stuff they served in the care home was complete shit, I think you and me might be the only ones alive who really know what it actually tasted like.’
‘That’s ironic, considering I never really knew what he put in that stuff,’ said Krolia with a laugh. ‘But I’ll do my best. Go hug Kosmo, I’ll be out in a minute.’
Keith nodded and headed out to the living room, where Kosmo was waiting for him on the couch. He flopped down beside the huge wolf and buried his face in his mane - probably Kosmo gave the best hugs in the entire universe, bar none. Kosmo whined and nosed at his back, Keith just held him tighter, but the wolf seemed to understand that he simply needed comfort right now and settled. If Keith thought about it, he could tell why so many people thought he had some kind of psychic bond with his wolf, but they’d been around each other so long they just knew how to read one another. Krolia could read Kosmo almost as well, in fact.
‘Awake?’ she said, and Keith and Kosmo both raised their heads.
‘Yeah. Oh my god that smells exquisite.’
‘I hope I got it right,’ said Krolia, sitting down and handing Keith one of the bowls in her hands. ‘This was how I remembered it. Careful, it’s hot.’
It was too hot to taste for a few tantalising minutes, and then when Keith finally got to try it he very nearly burst into tears. ‘Mom, it’s perfect. It’s just like Dad made it. I think… I think I can even work out what it is? Oh my god, it’s the best thing I ever tasted in my entire life.’
Krolia sniffed and brushed her cheek with the heel of her hand. ‘Go on then, tell me what it is.’
Keith shovelled a spoonful into his mouth. ‘Tastes like… Kraft mac n cheese made with half n half, with strong cheddar melted in and chilli Doritos crushed on top to give it crunch. And oh my god I know what it is, there’s Tabasco in this, no wonder I could never make it right, goddammit, my dad was a fucking genius. Fuck, I’m crying, I’m sorry, Mom, I just… I miss Dad.’
‘I know, love,’ said Krolia. ‘It’s fine. I miss him too. He’d have been so proud of you, you know.’
‘Would he, though?’ said Keith, looking down at his bowl. ‘I mean, even if he did get the whole breeder thing - I threw Kolivan out. I was mad at him because he wouldn’t just get it over with. Honestly though, if I don’t want to drag it out does that make me chicken?’
‘Drag it out?’ said Krolia slowly. ‘He… did say something about you asking him to hurt you.’
‘It was gonna happen eventually, there was no need for him to taunt me about it. I was only trying to make him stop making me wait.’
Krolia stared at him for a few seconds, opened and closed her mouth a couple of times, and then said, ‘Keith… sex isn’t supposed to hurt.’ Her brow creased. ‘Kolivan wouldn’t have hurt you.’
‘It always looks like it does in the porn,’ Keith mumbled into his bowl. ‘And my first heat-’ He stopped himself before he could go any further. ‘It doesn’t matter. Even if I keep on being a chickenshit about it we’ll just wait until I go into heat and then I won’t be able to stop.’
He glanced up and wished he hadn’t. Krolia was staring at him in undisguised horror. ‘Oh, my son, who did this to you?’
‘Did what?’
‘Who made you think it has to hurt? I’m not talking about your horrible Earth porn. Who was it that hurt you?’
‘First boyfriend,’ said Keith after a long pause. ‘Couple of heats in, I was, what, fifteen? Couldn’t stop myself from wanting it. He said I was a freak, like the ladyboys on the porn videos. It hurt like hell and he was calling me some really shitty things but I loved it anyway because that’s heat, right? Anyway once it was over I dumped him and also broke three of his ribs so we’re done now.’
‘What’s his name?’
‘I’m not telling you.’
‘Keith…’
‘Mom, drop it, OK?’ Keith looked up and slapped the empty bowl onto the coffee table. ‘It’s over. I don’t want you murdering a fucking Garrison member, no matter how much of a prick he is.’
Krolia sighed, finished her mac n cheese and stacked the bowl on top of Keith’s. ‘Alright. I won’t go investigating or trying to find out but if I do eventually find out who it was, no promises.’
‘Sure.’
‘Anyway, the thought occurs that now I need to give you a bit of a more thorough talk about galra anatomy than I gave you while we were on the space whale. I didn’t actually think you’d really have children, honestly - I can’t think why I thought that, to be honest. At the time there was so much to do, and you’ve always been so focussed.’
Keith gave a little lopsided smile. ‘Yeah, I can’t say babies were on my mind back then. So one thing that does keep bugging me is that these guys are all huge. Antok and Kolivan especially, are they going to, like, fit?’
Krolia laughed. ‘Oh, of course! In fact that’s why it’s vital to them that you have a good time!’
‘I don’t understand.’
‘Remember I told you that you as an omega produce slick, and your vagina will get more relaxed the more orgasms you have?’
Keith flushed and looked away. ‘I think I may have just about successfully erased that conversation from my memory.’
‘Well, don’t, it’s important. Be an adult about it, this is your body we’re talking about. Anyway, yes, the better prepared you are, the more dilated you become and the more you will be able to take. There is absolutely no need to worry about that.’
‘I feel like maybe I don’t have room inside me for whatever Antok is packing.’
‘Yes you do. You’re not built like a human. Even when you’re pregnant it will be fine, as long as you’re careful. And then when you start breastfeeding-’
Keith glared at her. ‘When I start what.’
‘Breastfeeding,’ repeated Krolia patiently.
‘But I don’t have boobs!’ said Keith, gesturing expansively at his very flat chest.
‘But you will,’ said Krolia. ‘They should start to come in towards the start of the second quadmester - that’s about two months - although there’s some room for variation. Don’t worry, they’re not permanent.’
‘Wait, so does that mean Galra pregnancy only lasts eight months?’
Krolia grinned and reached across to pat him on the knee. ‘Well done, you’re keeping up very well! Although if you gestate for nine months like a human that’s probably fine too. Anyway, I was saying, breastfeeding - you’ll need to ask Ulaz for a breast pump because they leak even when the child isn’t hungry and sometimes the child is hungry and you only want to sleep, so it’s good to have a bottle on stand-by.’ She grinned. ‘You might find your alphas get… interested in them.’
Keith snorted. ‘Men love boobs no matter the species, huh? Can’t say I blame them, Kolivan’s got some great tits.’
That caused Krolia to give a short bark of laughter and Kosmo sat up, puzzled. Keith petted his mane until he lay down again and Krolia got her giggling under control. ‘Yes, I have to agree, our leader is exceptionally well-endowed in that department. You like it?’
Keith flushed. ‘I am not talking to my mom about what I do or do not find attractive in my huge alien husbandos.’
Krolia raised an eyebrow. ‘That didn’t stop you talking about Shiro while we were in the Void.’
All at once, the temperature in the room seemed to drop, the levity crushed out as if by a huge weight. Keith hugged his knees to his chest and said, ‘I don’t want to talk about him right now, Mom.’
‘Oh. I’m so sorry.’ Krolia shuffled closer to Keith and put an arm around him, and he leaned closer - only to leap away when she pressed her nose against his neck. Kosmo immediately jumped to attention, all teeth and bristling mane.
‘Mom, what the fuck? What are you doing?’
‘I’m scenting you,’ replied Krolia, looking hurt, eyes flicking between Keith and Kosmo. ‘Kolivan said he’d told you about that. Kosmo, I’m not going to hurt him. Keith, tell him I’m not going to hurt you.’ Kosmo snarled at her.
‘Yeah, but he said it was a mates thing!’
Understanding dawned on her face, and she laughed. ‘No, silly. Sit down, it’s a pack thing. Yes, scenting can be a thing you can do with your mates but it’s also a family thing.’
Keith sat down, a hand on Kosmo’s back, and he whined, but settled down again. ‘It’s OK, Kosmo, don’t attack Mom, you know Mom.’ Kosmo nosed at Keith’s chin - scenting me, he thought, - and curled up on the couch again. ‘OK. A pack thing. So why not do it while we were in the Void?’
‘I was afraid you would react badly. You were still getting used to the idea that I was your mother, and Tex had responded to scenting entirely sexually. I didn’t know how you would interpret it.’
Keith considered this, then shrugged. ‘Fair. So why not show me how families scent each other, it’s been over twenty years.’
‘Ancestors, it has been much too long, hasn’t it,’ said Krolia, smiling. She held out her arms and let Keith accept the hug, burying her nose into the soft skin behind his ear and breathing in briefly.
The sensation was entirely different from when Kolivan had done it. This time, the flood of comfort and safety, the feeling that he was home, was so powerful that he almost burst into tears - in fact when he scented her in return and she smelled not only of metal and ozone and fur lotion but also of the desert shack and now of Dad’s mac n cheese as well, tears were pouring freely down his cheeks when he pulled away.
‘Oh, no,’ said Krolia, thumbing away the tears. ‘Was it bad?’
‘Lil bit too much,’ said Keith. ‘I’ll be OK in a minute.’ Then he dropped his head on his mother’s shoulder and let himself cry, no, howl out the stress and the loss of the past few months.
Ten minutes later he was a little red-eyed, but sitting with a mug of tea and able to talk perfectly normally about why exactly Krolia and Ezor were looking for weblums if the teleduvs were obsolete now.
‘Actually they might not be,’ said Krolia. ‘Allura gave the Mark of the Chosen to Lance, so we’re going to have him try, or Matt Holt mentioned that Romelle has never actually been ruled out.’
Keith frowned. ‘Yeah, she hasn’t, has she… That’d be really cool for Romelle if it did work. But anyway tell me about Lance. How is he?’
Krolia grimaced. ‘Not… actually very good at present. Still grieving Allura, and therapy is not helping him much. And you leaving so suddenly-’
‘Wait, does he think it’s something he did?’
‘Not… exactly. He thinks, and I quote, he’s “been such a sadsack lately” that you obviously would want to get away. What is a sadsack?’
‘A sack of sadness, obviously.’ Keith sighed and dragged his hand down his face. ‘God, I didn’t think Lance would be the moping type. I kinda thought he’d be the “bottle everything up until something breaks and then do something drastic” type.’
‘No, darling, that’s what you’re like. Lance isn’t the moping type, he’s the unprecedented levels of self-blame type.’
‘Oh. Yeah.’ Keith paused. ‘I should call him except it’d get back to Shiro. Mom, can you tell him I left because of Shiro, not because of him? And I’ll call him soon but I have a lot going on right now and I don’t want Shiro knowing I called, but I will call him first?’
Krolia looked Keith up and down. ‘You do have to call Shiro eventually.’
‘Pressure on the eventually.’
Krolia sighed. ‘Yes, I will pass your message on. Now, did you have any plans for the rest of the morning?’
‘Well, I was going to call the others in for lunch but it’s not time yet…’ Keith smiled. ‘Wanna help me decorate?’
Krolia grinned back. ‘I’d love to.’
Notes:
So I have been ill and basically doing nothing but write in between sleeping and watching Danganronpa playthroughs, so you get a second chapter! You guys, your comments have been giving me so much love and happiness, I love you so much!
No smut yet but if you have read any of my stuff before you know me, I'm a slow starter and then there's nothing but smut for days, if you're here for the smut we'll get to it, if you're here for the text version of a romcom then OH BOY have I got good news for you.
Also in case anyone is wondering, I don't capitalize 'galra' because we don't capitalize 'human' - if the name was derived from a planet, like Olkarion/Olkari, I would capitalize that, or if they were called Daibazaali, but they're not. If any alien refers to a human as an Earthling? That is, as it were, a capital offence, har har.
(btw, I have not in fact tested Tex's mac n cheese recipe, I just put in what sounds good to me. It might be dreadful, and what makes it taste so good to Keith and Krolia is Nostalgia Sauce. If anyone wants to test it and report back, that would be awesome.)
Chapter 3: A Pedestal Just For You
Summary:
In which Keith starts his new job, AKA, this chapter is almost entirely smut, and we find out that Someone other than Keith has a Crush.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
The main hall of the Marmora base was big and impressive, made even more so by the clear dome that curved gracefully from the floor on two sides and took up the entire ceiling, and the tall windows on a third wall - it was easy to watch New Daibazaal and all the magnificence of space spiral past and think you were about to drop straight into it. Keith had thought, the first time seeing it, that it was like being on the bridge of the Castle of Lions again. Set in the walls were big lighted cases, displaying all the blades of the fallen Marmora agents that they had been able to recover. Too many fallen, too many blades, and so many that weren’t here. Keith could put faces to only a few of them, but the collective loss still felt huge and heavy when he saw the display.
And now, entering with Krolia, his lump of luxite ore in his hand, he hesitated in the doorway and looked around - everyone else was standing at attention in a circle, clearly waiting for him.
‘Don’t worry,’ said Krolia, and squeezed his other hand. ‘You’ll do fine. I’m proud of you.’ Then she raised her mask and went to take her place in the circle on Kolivan’s left side.
Keith took a deep breath, raised his mask and entered the ring of blank, many-eyed faces. At least he knew them all well enough now to know which was which, which was a relief. He faced Kolivan and raised his chin, the lump of rock held in both hands in front of him.
‘Commandant Keith,’ said Kolivan. ‘It is time for you to form your own blade from the ore which you have been given. How you will use it and therefore its shape is something only you can know, and must draw it from the rock. If it cannot be done, then only you know the reason why and what must be done about it.’
Right. No pressure, thought Keith, but he nodded, then remembered himself and said, ‘Yes, Leader.’
‘You may begin when you are ready. Do what you must.’
Keith huffed a little breath, trying to forget about everyone watching him, sat down in the centre of the circle, and closed his eyes. He reached out to the rock, almost expecting it to respond as the Red and Black Lions had, and to his surprise there was something there - but it was out of reach and strange. Like trying to talk to a goldfish, or something.
OK, so what was the blade for, now? Not for war. If anything he needed a practical knife and a sword that would let him defend his children should anything attack the base. Something double-bladed and relatively short for fighting in close quarters. He’d used his old knife as a tool as much as anything, before - the same kind of thing would be great, except maybe with a straighter blade? Keith could picture them both so clearly, and picture himself using them, and the lump of ore almost tingled in his hands.
But nothing happened. And nothing continued to happen, even though it charged his body and made every nerve electric, buzzing along the sides of his neck and his inner thighs and-
Oh.
Keith’s eyes snapped open. The electric feeling stopped, all at once. ‘It’s not gonna work,’ he said flatly. ‘I need a blade for a Commandant but I’m not being a... Commandant yet.’
There was a rustle around the circle and Keith was extremely glad that Ezor and Zethrid weren’t allowed to say anything right now.
‘Have you a solution?’ said Kolivan. ‘You have time still. Or you may step down and try again as your old rank.’
‘No,’ said Keith. He turned to the right. ‘Major Thace, will you assist me, please?’
‘Of course,’ said Thace. ‘I’d be honoured. Leader, may we be excused?’
‘You’re dismissed,’ said Kolivan. ‘Good luck.’
As they left, Keith really would have preferred not to hear Ezor say, ‘What did he mean, “not being Commandant”?’
Zethrid’s ‘He means he hasn’t been banging, dimwit,’ in reply was even worse.
The door to Keith’s quarters swished closed behind them, and Kosmo instantly came to greet him - Keith scruffed his mane briefly and said, ‘Not now, boy. Go find mom.’
Kosmo glanced at Thace, then back at Keith, then obediently vanished. Keith still said nothing to Thace, just went into the bedroom, put the lump of luxite on its shelf, discarded his hood, and turned around. ‘OK. What are you waiting for?’
Thace, who had been looking around the room at the string of bare bulbs above the bed, the stark steel shelves up one wall, what appeared to be some kind of primitive radio device, the posters of hoverbikes and the steel table fan, looked around. ‘What? No, I was just admiring what you have done here. It’s certainly unexpected.’
‘It’s a bit more like home,’ said Keith, shrugging. ‘Now come on, Thace, get it over with.’
Thace’s eyes widened. ‘“Get it over with”? Oh. I see. Yes, I heard about your argument with Kolivan.’
Keith’s shoulders immediately went up and he folded his arms over his chest. ‘Does everyone know?’
‘Oh, no. Just Krolia and myself. And I told him to tell Antok.’
‘Antok?’
‘Kolivan is our leader, he is here for all of us when we need him. And Antok is here for him when he needs someone. You must have noticed.’
Keith nodded. ‘Oh, yeah, I saw. They flirt with each other way easier than either of them flirt with me. Anyway, we’re getting off-topic. Did he tell you what it was about?’
‘He said… that he suspected you were sustaining significant trauma concerning a previous sexual experience, and had expected him to hurt you likewise.’ Thace stroked the side of Keith’s face with a big, surprisingly soft palm, and Keith found himself leaning into the caress despite himself. ‘There is no rush, Keith. You can take as much time as you like.’
Keith shook his head. ‘No. Cause if I don’t put out then my blade won’t activate, so I have to actually face up to it.’
‘Put out?’
‘If I don’t fuck, Thace. You don’t need to treat me like I’m made of eggshell. I did your trial, you know what I can take.’
Thace smiled sadly and leaned down to scent him. ‘What if I wanted to treat you like that? Like you were precious, and deserved every good thing?’
‘Oh god, you’re the one who wants to put me up on some pedestal,’ grumbled Keith, but he swayed in against Thace’s chest and tipped his head to the side to expose his neck the instant he felt the touch of lips against his throat.
‘Is that so bad? You talk about sex as though you’re facing a battle.’
‘I… don't know what to do with this.’
‘Just don’t force yourself. Remember, I don’t want to hurt you - if I do, I want to know. I can tell a certain amount from your scent but I’m not actually psychic.’
Keith drew back enough to look Thace in the eye. ‘Oh, yeah? What can you tell, exactly?’
‘You’re afraid,’ replied Thace. ‘There are many reasons why your pulse could be racing like that but you’re tense and you reek of adrenaline. If you’re aroused you’re an exceptionally good actor and also? You don’t smell of slick.’
Keith stared at him in silence, then looked away. ‘Oh, fuck you. Alright, fine, yeah, I’m scared. It doesn’t matter. I promise I’ll tell you if I want to stop, now get the hell on with it.’
‘Keith-’ What Thace had been about to say was lost as Keith lost patience with him, caught hold of his face in both hands and mashed their mouths together - there was a painful clash of teeth for a second, then Thace turned his head a little, their lips slotted neatly into sync and the kiss turned into gentle, unhurried exploration, and Keith was so absorbed that he barely realised their bodies were tightly pressed against one another, and when had he pushed a knee between Thace’s thighs?
He pulled away a little, breathing hard but with a smile twitching at his lips, and raised a fingertip to push Thace’s upper lip back and examine his fangs. ‘How can you be so big and toothy but still so gentle?’
Thace chuckled apologetically. ‘I know I’m not very human-like-’
‘Oh, fuck, stop right there, Thace. I like your fangs, OK? They’re hot. I wanna feel them on my neck.’ Then he demonstrated by stretching up as far as he could go and biting Thace on the neck. He wasn’t trying hard and with his blunt human teeth he would have had to do a lot more than that to break the skin, but Thace shivered all over, whimpered and picked Keith up, depositing him on his back on the bed so he could scent him and rub up against him at the same time. Keith threw his head back and spread his legs, opening up for him before he was even aware he’d done it. ‘Holy hell, Thace… Get me out of this suit right now. That’s an order.’
‘Yes, sir,’ said Thace, unclipping Keith’s belt and opening his tunic, then taking hold of one corner of the neckline and unzipping the entire suit diagonally down the front and between Keith’s legs. If Keith hadn’t sat up suddenly so that Thace had had to avoid having their heads knock together, probably it would have unzipped even further.
‘Wait, how did I not find that?’ said Keith. ‘Does it split completely in half? Also why in the fuck?’
Thace laughed and sat down, pulling Keith into his lap and discarding the tunic completely. ‘No, it doesn’t go completely in half,’ he said. ‘Just about this far.’ He reached back and finished unzipping it - apparently it split about as far as the waistline. ‘And then there’s another split here - look, if you look closely you can see the break in the fabric.’ Thace indicated the faint pucker in the slick black cloth, which Keith had assumed was a seam, and then he took hold of it and unzipped it all the way around Keith’s waist. ‘It’s mostly for convenience if you give birth somewhere away from the base. But it’s also got other uses too.’
‘Right,’ said Keith, thinking, My god, he undressed me in under thirty seconds. He looked down at himself, at the front of his suit now hanging open over his chest, and pulled on the draped fabric a little. ‘Oh, hey, there’s another zip on the other side of my chest here - is this for breastfeeding or something?’
‘That’s right,’ said Thace. He unzipped it and what would have become a superfluous rag of fabric vanished like the mask. ‘But that’s later.’ Then he scraped his teeth along Keith’s collarbone and kissed down his exposed chest - Keith made a confused whine and fisted his hands in Thace’s hair at the wet slide of a tongue over his nipple, the possessive raising of a red mark in the shape of Thace’s mouth on his clavicle.
Holy shit, he was wet now and getting to be half-hard and he was so exposed, and that was terrifying, no matter what anybody said. Thace would know, and use it as a weapon - everyone always did eventually. ‘Thace,’ said Keith desperately, ‘What are you doing?’
Thace raised his head, lips shining with spit, and for an instant he was gorgeous enough that Keith didn’t care what he did to him. ‘What do you mean?’ he said. ‘You said get on with it.’
‘You’re playing around, is what you’re doing. You’re still fully dressed, aren’t you supposed to have your dick in me by now?’
Keith immediately hated the look Thace gave him. It was like the look Kolivan had given him when he’d found out Keith had never been scented, but Thace was much more expressive so this was much, much worse.
‘Haven’t you ever had anyone properly warm you up?’
‘Not this again. It doesn’t matter.’
‘Of course it matters.’ This time, Thace tipped him into the huge pile of pillows and started stripping himself of his uniform - which was far more cumbersome than Keith’s - stating as he did so, ‘Alright, this is how this goes. All ranks aside, just speaking as someone with far more experience than you, this is how actual civilized people have sex. As the alpha it is my responsibility to get you properly prepared before I even think of penetrating you. That means you get to come at least twice and then, if I think you’re ready, we can try. Usually I’d ask you if you were ready but it’s pretty clear you both don’t know and you’ll probably lie about it, and that will only get you hurt. If you get too tired or have to eat then we’ll stop and try again later; it’s fine, there’s no pressure, sometimes it takes a while to get to knot.’
‘I wouldn’t lie to you!’ said Keith indignantly, still stripping himself of the remaining jigsaw pieces of his uniform.
Thace leaned down and kissed him hard. ‘Again, you obviously have no idea when you’re ready. Let me take care of you.’
Keith glared at him, then his shoulders sagged in defeat. ‘Fine. You win.’
Thace cupped a hand around his jaw and tilted his face up into a warm, soft kiss - part of Keith wasn’t ready for the intensity and wanted to wriggle away, but it was overwhelmed by the desire to surrender and be cherished. When it ended, Keith could only gape at Thace and say, ‘But you only get to come once, how is this any good for you?’
Thace flopped down beside him, smiling, and stroked his cheek with the backs of his fingertips. ‘First, it’s not about me, it’s about you. Second? I’m happy just to be here. I’ll probably - no, definitely come more than once. Now let me show you how this is supposed to feel.’
‘I’m probably going to call you Shiro at least once.’
Thace’s smile went a little lopsided but it didn’t go away. ‘That’s alright. I don’t mind.’
Keith swallowed, looking Thace up and down - the broad curve of his chest, narrow hips, the Lichtenberg figures tracing over his thighs and torso from his ordeal with the Druids, his very obvious arousal - Keith hoped like hell that what his mother had said was true because that was big enough to really hurt. But still, enough stalling. He gave Thace what he hoped was a convincing smile and said, ‘OK then. Show me.’
He was expecting the kiss, wet and sloppy and full of promise. He wasn’t expecting Thace to instantly slide down the length of his body and start mouthing his cock. The moan that eeled its way out of his throat entirely surprised him and he slapped a hand across his mouth to check any further sounds - Griffin had called him whore and worse when he'd cried out in his heat - but Thace only wrapped his hand around Keith's shaft and pressed a sucking kiss to his hip.
‘Keith,’ he said, and there was only hungry pleading in his voice. ‘Please let me hear you,’ and another kiss a little lower down, at the junction of hip and thigh.
Keith gasped through his fingers - it's fine, it's Thace, he isn't going to make me feel like a slut because of what he made me do, that's why he's here - and forced himself to say, ‘I'll do my best.’
Thace smiled up at him, and Keith had to look away, it was too like the proud-of-you smiles Shiro had given him before everything had fallen apart. And then soft, warm lips were wrapped around the head of his cock and any attempt at feeling sorry for himself dissolved completely.
‘Thace, what the fuck?’ he yelped, watching his shaft vanish into Thace’s mouth. ‘Oh god, you don't have to do that, fuck…’
Thace, maintaining eye contact, pulled off slowly with a wet pop. ‘I want to,’ he said, then he gave Keith a not entirely wholesome smile. ‘I want to taste you. Do you think you might hurt me? No offence, my darling, but I have had men three times your size fuck my throat raw and loved it. I've blown Regris and he has suckers, that left me hoarse for a week.’
Keith blinked. ‘Suckers.’
‘He says to tell you he promises to be gentle.’
‘...Alright. Fine.’ That was when something that had been knocking on Keith's brain for attention finally got impatient and put the boot in. ‘Wait, what did you call me?’
Thace hid his face in Keith's hip. ‘“My darling”? If you don't like it I can stop it.’
Keith bit his lip and smiled. ‘No, I… I like it. It make take a while to get used to. But I like it.’
Thace kissed the inside of Keith's thigh. ‘Precious? Treasure?’
‘I, uh, sure.’ Keith was flushing now, his legs spreading wider and wider under Thace's ministrations. ‘Anything you want. It's nice.’
He wasn’t sure he could bear Thace’s smile, so maybe it was better when he licked a searching stripe starting where Keith had suddenly got very hot and wet, and Keith shrieked and almost bucked him off. Thace looked up, concerned. ‘Oh, no, did I hurt you?’
‘Oh, god. No. That feels amazing - uh…’ Keith hesitated, then remembered that Thace wanted to worship him, put him on a pedestal and make him feel good. Well, then… ‘Do it again.’
Thace instantly pressed his lips to Keith’s dripping hole and Keith was ready for the deep, drawn-out groan this time, but didn’t try to suppress it. Instead he kicked one leg over Thace’s shoulder and started rubbing his fingertips in his hair and said, ‘Deeper.’
Thace obliged, plunging his tongue into Keith and wrapping a hand around his shaft - Keith became breathless and noisy very quickly and then, as his scratching behind Thace’s ears increased and Thace began to purr, the vibrations shaking him all the way up from the base of his spine, there was rapidly nowhere to go as his orgasm overtook him, stars in the edges of his vision and his whole body purring alongside Thace.
When he pulled himself a little more together, he realised he was not getting fucked, and Thace had not left the room. In fact Thace was still there, head resting on Keith’s thigh and he was panting a little, watching him with a pleased expression and messy lips. Keith gave him a sloppy smile back. ‘Hi.’
‘Hi,’ said Thace, drawing a meaningless squiggle in the jizz on Keith’s chest. ‘Feel good?’
‘So good,’ said Keith. ‘So what now? Round two?’
‘Mmm.’ Thace licked his fingertips clean and a shiver went down Keith's spine. ‘Let me take care of you a little first.’
He sat up and retrieved a pouch of water from the shelf above the headboard - the bed was wide enough to make nightstands nearly useless - and wrapped Keith's hands around it. Then he went back to meticulously licking his chest and stomach clean.
Keith very nearly squeezed the pouch and got water everywhere. ‘What are you doing?’
‘Don't worry, I'm just cleaning you up. Drink your water.’
Keith nodded and stuck the straw in his mouth, watching as Thace licked every drop of jizz off his chest, then started spreading kisses along his collarbone, sucking up little tender hickies on his solar plexus, barely scraping his fangs over his nipples - there was such a single-minded devotion to it, if Keith was stupid he might almost let himself think he was loved. He realised he'd forgotten to drink, finished his water as soon as possible and sat up to scent Thace and gnaw on his throat, drinking in the warm-home smell and the undertone of good food behind the metal and ozone scent that Keith was starting to expect from all the Blades.
Thace chuckled, a warm sound that shook them both a little, but was entirely contained within the circle of his arms. ‘You can bite harder if you want to,’ he said. ‘You’d have to try a lot harder than that to break my skin.’
‘Mmyeah, I’m not trying to… you know,’ mumbled Keith into the curve of Thace’s shoulder. ‘It’s weird, I should be getting a mouthful of fur but instead it’s sort of comforting. I can taste your scent this way, it’s… really fucking nice. You smell like home, not like the desert back on Earth, but just like home generally, is that weird? Thace?’
Thace, who looked like he’d just been hit with a plank, had nothing to say for a moment, and then his face crumpled into confused joy. ‘That’s the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me in my entire life.’
Keith bit him again a couple of times, just so he didn’t have to look at that stunned-sweet expression, and muttered, ‘Well, I don’t know why. You have a nice smell, it’s no big deal.’
Thace put a couple of fingertips under Keith’s chin, tipped his face up and pressed their lips together, then said, ‘One day you will find out what a big deal it really is. In the meantime I’m just going to say, thankyou very much, Keith. I’m enormously flattered.’
‘OK. Thanks for not dwelling on it,’ said Keith. ‘Um. Omegas get to make requests, right?’
‘Of course. In fact I’ll do anything you want. Unless I think it will harm you, your word is my command.’
‘Right.’ Keith drummed his fingertips on Thace’s collarbone for a second, then looked up into his face. ‘Can I… have a look at you? I mean that’s OK, right? I can touch you too, yes?’
‘Of course!’ said Thace. ‘How - I mean, I hadn’t realised you didn’t know you could, if I had I would have said. Do anything you want.’
‘Yeah, well, say if I do something wrong,’ mumbled Keith sliding his hands down Thace’s chest and around his sides - Thace hissed suddenly and Keith froze. ‘What? What’d I do?’
‘Nothing,’ said Thace, leaning back a little to show the lightning-bolt scars all the way down his sides, wrapping halfway round his front. ‘These scars just don’t really stretch very well. They’ll probably go numb with age but I haven’t had them that long and I’m still having to put lotion on them twice a day to keep the skin supple.’
‘Oh. Oh, fuck, yeah, of course.’ This time, Keith’s fingertips barely traced the fractals on Thace’s skin, and he thought about some of his own scars. The one to his right shoulder in particular had required exacting care, and still did. ‘At least yours are pretty.’
‘I’m glad you think so, at least.’
At this, Keith reared up and wrapped his arms round Thace’s neck to kiss him as hard as he could. ‘Yes, I do,’ he said. ‘They’re totally badass. You might not think so and I get why not but one day you’re gonna look at them and think, “hey, I got those scars being so amazingly brave and competent it takes Keith’s breath away and he thinks they’re gorgeous. I think they are too”. One day.’
Thace laughed and returned the kiss, then kissed down the column of his neck out to the edge of his shoulder. ‘Ah, Keith, don’t you realise I’m supposed to be worshipping you?’
Keith laughed. ‘Yeah, well, you made me realise I like seeing my partner smiling at me. Now where was I?’ He snaked his fingers down Thace’s chest and between his legs, blinked and looked at his hand. ‘Thace… you’re soaking. Did you come already?’ He licked his hand. ‘No, wait, this is slick. Alphas produce slick?’
‘Yes, we do, did nobody tell you this?’ Thace raised his brows. ‘Doesn’t your cock produce slick too? Ancestors, so your heat-’
‘Humans use synthetic lube,’ said Keith, hastily. ‘Like, a lot of it, usually. But no, I don’t have a self-lubricating dick, what the fuck…’ Before Thace could worry, Keith had closed his hand around Thace’s shaft - purple, huge and leaking slick from several firm protrusions along its length - and stroked twice. Thace gave a long, drawn-out sigh and closed his hands on Keith’s thighs, settling him in his lap. ‘Great idea,’ said Keith, catching Thace’s hand and closing it around both their cocks. ‘Help me out here, Purple Wolverine.’
‘What?’
‘Earth pop culture reference, I’ll explain later,’ replied Keith. ‘For now, let’s put that slick to good use. I want you in me today, please.’
Thace smiled and squeezed gently, causing Keith to grunt softly. ‘Whatever you want, my darling.’
‘Ughh,’ Keith hid his face in Thace’s chest but he had a feeling it was too late and Thace had already seen him flush. He could only hope he didn’t know what it meant. Oh, damn, and he was purring too. ‘Fuck, Thace, I should make you stop calling me that. No, don’t stop.’
‘Is there a problem?’ said Thace, stilling the movement of his hand.
‘I said don’t stop,’ said Keith, rocking his hips and applying teeth to shoulder to get Thace’s hand going again.
Thace took the hint and started sliding his now very slick hand over their cocks in a slow but steady rhythm. ‘Should I stop calling you darling?’
‘Ngggghhh…’ said Keith. ‘When you say it it feels like you think you love me. And I wanna believe it but I know why I’m really here and it’s good, Thace, I didn’t think it would feel this good, but I can’t fall into that trap again.’
Thace had stopped again, his movements broken and distracted, to look down into Keith’s face. Finally he said, ‘This does not seem like the time or place for a love confession.’
Keith snorted. ‘You’d better not.’
Then Thace nodded. ‘Then I won’t. Kiss me, Precious.’
‘Yeah, I can deal with that,’ Keith reared up on his knees a little to give Thace a passionate kiss and Thace used the opportunity to push a finger of his free hand down between Keith’s swollen labia and into his hole. Keith keened and bore down on it, wrapped a hand around the big paw encircling their dicks, and encouraged Thace to move faster.
Thace obeyed, with a little twist of his wrist at the top of each stroke that rapidly had Keith whimpering desperately into Thace's mouth. ‘Mm, mm, yes, more…’
Thace mumbled something that the base’s translator only caught as an expression of generalised worshipful awe, but he did give him a second finger, just as far as the first knuckle and that was a good thing, because it was tighter than Keith had expected. Not tight enough to hurt, though, and he bit down hard on Thace’s shoulder, rutting up into his hand as much as he could. ‘Come on, give it to me, give me more, do you think I’m gonna break just because I’m smaller?’
‘Ancessstors, no,’ growled Thace, his voice coming from very deep in his chest and with a shock, Keith realised that Thace was far closer to losing control than he was.
He grinned and tightened his grip on their dicks - little stars came and went at the corners of his vision - and then said softly, ‘Go on, Thace, I can tell you’re close, I wanna see you come for me.’ He bore down a little on Thace’s hand and added, ‘Think we can go together?’
Thace gave a gasping moan and pushed the second finger inside him completely, it took two more strokes of their joined hands on their slick and swollen cocks before Keith was gone, sobbing happily into Thace’s shoulder - and when he turned his head and sucked on his partner’s neck that was both of them, Thace grunting animalistically and tightening his arms around Keith.
The sound of both of them gasping for breath as they came back to themselves sounded far louder than it should, Thace's shoulder heaving under Keith's forehead and vibrating with his purr, but eventually Keith turned his head and pressed a kiss to Thace's jaw. ‘You still there, big guy?’
‘Isn't that Antok?’ rasped Thace.
‘You're all big guy. Even Regris. On account of you all being so damn big.’
‘Ah. Well, yes, I am still here. Not that I would ever abandon you, but I don't know if you realise that you are clenching down on my fingers with a ferocity that makes me fear for their safety should I attempt to withdraw them.’
Keith hadn't even noticed, but he grinned. ‘Good. Gimme another.’
‘Quiznak, Keith, allow me a tick to breathe. I promise I will satisfy you.’
‘I bet you will,’ said Keith, nuzzling Thace's jaw.
‘Now may I have my hand back? I can't do anything with cramp.’
Keith rolled his eyes theatrically. ‘God, the demands of some people,’ he said, but he relaxed his pelvic muscles and Thace pulled his hand free with an obscene slick sound that went right down his spine. The painful little clicks as Thace flexed his fingers were not so fun, and snapped Keith out of his silly mood right away. ‘Oh, hey, does that hurt? Did I hurt you?’
‘Not overly much,’ replied Thace. ‘I am not fragile either. And it's well worth it to see you taking pleasure in this.’
‘Oh - well, you definitely got that,’ said Keith. He kissed Thace, just because he could and it was, well, a nice diversion. Then he sat back and looked at this man, with his hair mussed and spiked in places with slick and jizz, his lips plump and shiny and with dark bitemarks up and down his neck. Keith had made a satisfying mess of Thace, even if they hadn’t finished yet. He couldn’t wait to see how he looked. First, though…
He nipped Thace under the ear and murmured, ‘If you don’t fuck me now I’m gonna flip you on your back and take care of the issue myself.’
‘If you think I can be ready again in under a minute you have another thing coming,’ said Thace. ‘I haven’t knotted yet, so not long, but you are going to need to be a little patient, my treasure. Here, let me entertain you.’
Thace laid Keith on his back again - this time, Keith bracketed Thace's hips with his knees, looking up into his face and rubbing behind his ears with his thumbs. Two big, dextrous fingers went in easily and Keith made an animal sound and arched his whole body up against Thace, knotting his hands so tight in his hair that it had to hurt.
Thace gave no sign of pain, though, only murmured Keith's name against his throat and worked his fingers, in and out, scissoring them, until his hand was dripping wet and Keith was begging incoherently for more. This time, Thace gave it to him, and almost the second the third digit was inside him, Keith came a third time, a clawing, gabbling mess of emotion and need and instinct. When Thace withdrew his hand he howled at him and tried to hang on, and Thace - probably risking getting his fingers bitten off - put a couple of slick fingers into his mouth.
Keith's eyes, hugely dilated, focussed on Thace's face, and he sucked his fingers clean, suddenly quiet except for his heavy breaths.
‘Feel good?’ asked Thace. Keith nodded, licking his lips. ‘Great. Now we’re both ready.’
‘Fuck, yes,’ breathed Keith. ‘I… I really need you right now.’
‘I know. Just relax, I'll take care of you. You… you should turn over.’
‘Oh, we’re doing it that way? That's fine. It's a shame I don't get to keep looking at your face but I can't have everything. Don't look surprised, you're easily the hottest Blade, that's always been true.’
Keith had turned over by this point, so he didn't see Thace's face as he said this - he only felt the hands on his hips and the kiss on the back of his neck before Thace said, ‘Actually, Keith, I think you will find that's you. By a long way.’
Even after all the gentle buildup, Keith was waiting for it to hurt when Thace entered him, but there was only a feeling of tightness, an acute awareness of the slick slide of the thick shaft as it pressed deeper inside and Thace was finally holding him tight against his hips. Was his breath trembling on Keith’s neck? It was, in fact, and Keith was going to have to work out later just why that was the hottest thing in the universe. Right now, Thace had stopped moving, and that just wasn’t OK.
‘Thace,’ said Keith faintly. ‘If you ask me if I’m OK I’m gonna smack you. Fuck me.’ He raised his hips as high as Thace’s weight would allow, and Thace drew himself up, pulling Keith back against him - when Keith twisted to look back at him, he had to bite his lip. Hot damn, he actually looked a little overwhelmed.
‘You’re going to be the death of me,’ Thace rasped, but he did start moving, and Keith whimpered and buried the side of his head in the pillow, trying unsuccessfully to keep an eye on Thace and not caring when the first thrust pushed pure sensation all the way up his spinal column. Someone moaned, and Keith wasn’t entirely sure it was him.
‘Harder,’ he gasped, almost shocked when the request was obeyed, and then he bit down on a scream as Thace bumped something deep inside him that sent lightning shocks through every nerve and if he hadn’t come so many times already tonight, he absolutely would have done this time. It was close. ‘Holy fuck, Thace! What the fuck was that?’ He only part heard the reply, and it was an uncomprehensible gabble of scientific-sounding galra nonsense, so Keith cut him off half-way with, ‘Freaky alien G-spot, right, now please, more of that, that’s amazing, you’re amazing, oh god…’
The rumble he got in reply was better than anything Thace could have said, primal and possessive as the strong hands dug into his hips and held him helplessly still and all he could do was lie there and feel the slide of Thace’s cock, the ridges of his slick glands and the burst of dizzying sensation as it slammed home. Words were gone, useless, the only thing Keith could do was gasp into the pillow, ‘Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god…’ louder and louder as he felt Thace start to swell and catch on the rim of his hole. That’s the knot, he thought, somewhere in his mind where he was still coherent. I can’t hold on, I’m gonna come before him, fuck.
It was true. Keith tried, he really did, he thought about dead bodies for a splitsecond before realising he was ruining this for himself, and then Thace leaned down and scraped his magnificent teeth over Keith’s shoulder and he was gone, sobbing Thace’s name and twisting fruitlessly to try and reach him. He was just coming down when Thace followed him, filling him with bright satisfying heat and making him see stars a second time, even if it was too soon for him to actually come.
For a long time there was silence, apart from their breathless panting and purring and the sound of Keith’s heartbeat thundering in his ears. At some point, Keith noted, he had developed a coat of peachfuzz violet fur, that was interesting, although probably not permanent. When he could think, he said, ‘Thace?’
‘I’m here.’
For some reason, that struck Keith as unbelievably funny and he couldn’t help giggling like an idiot, but finally he got that under control. ‘Of course you’re here, you have your knot in my cunt. You can’t help being here.’
‘Oh. I only meant I’m not going to leave you. I… the knot should go down in ten minutes or so, but...’
‘It’s fine.’ Keith patted the purple wrist draped across his stomach. ‘That was way better that I ever thought it could ever be. I just wanna… fall asleep now. Just like this. I don’t even care that I’m a mess, I just don’t wanna move.’
Thace’s embrace tightened a little, and Keith felt the press of a kiss to the back of his head. ‘I don’t think you know what a compliment that is.’
‘Yeah? So explain.’
‘Yes. Essentially you are implying that I have satisfied you well enough and made you feel safe enough that you have all you need, right here, and can rest without worrying about anything else.’
‘Oh… yeah. Well, it’s true. Here’s another thought before bed. You and me are gonna have such cute babies.’ There was no reply to this, but Thace spread his palm over Keith’s stomach, so Keith patted it, then said, ‘Now go to sleep, I’m tired.’
Keith woke in the middle of the night, strong arms around him, still too drunk with sleep and sex to remember clearly where he was and why. His bedmate stirred and made a questioning sound, and Keith slurred, ‘Shiro?’
There was a pause, then a quiet, calm voice replied, ‘No, I'm sorry, Keith. Not Shiro.’
That was when Keith put everything together, remembered what bed he was in, whose arms he was in, who was in fact still inside him. ‘Thace. Oh, god, I'm so sorry, Thace.’
‘It's fine, you warned me you might. And you never did while we were having sex, so I feel you did very well.’
Keith snorted. ‘Technically we're still having sex. I wanna turn around, could you..?’
‘Oh. Of course.’ Thace carefully pulled his deflated knot from Keith’s hole with an obscene wet schlorp and a considerable addition to the bodily fluids already sticky on Keith’s backside and thighs. Keith made a punched-out gasp at the sensation, almost a sob, and Thace scented him thoroughly, mouthing his throat until he relaxed into sleepy contentment once more. Then he turned him onto his back, reached up to the bed shelf and produced a warm, damp cloth to gently clean him up, and then himself. That done, he discarded the filthy top cover of the bed, tucked Keith in and got in beside him.
‘There, feel better?’
Keith, with the air of one scratching a troublesome itch, snuggled up against him with a careful arm round his side, head tucked up under his chin. ‘That’s better.’
This time, he closed his eyes and slept peacefully till morning.
Notes:
Oh hey so yeah this fic will likely have a ton of smut in it. There was also a recent decision that a lot of the fluff and kink vignettes that I like but which don't actually help the story are likely going to be farmed out into shorts, so expect a series! I mean, at this point this thing has five developing relationships and three sub-plots, because I can't ever do ANYTHING simple.
As for this chapter, egh. I have had hayfever all month and it wasn't sexy in the least. This was hard to write, I gotta admit. Never let it be said I don't work hard for you guise. <3
Chapter 4: The Morning After
Summary:
In which Keith wakes and hands out gifts and rules, gets his new blade, and finds out what Ulaz's deal is.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Keith should have been woken by the sudden weight of Kosmo materialising on the bed, but both he and Thace slept right through it, until the space wolf’s limited patience gave out, he whined loudly and licked Keith’s face.
Keith woke with a start. ‘Agh! Oh… Kosmo. Hi, boy.’
‘Keith? Are you- oh.’ Thace, who had woken and immediately hugged Keith protectively to him, relaxed when he saw Kosmo. ‘Is he… allowed on the bed?’
‘Yeah,’ said Keith, scruffing Kosmo’s mane. ‘I’ve been sharing my bed with him since he was a puppy, so sorry Thace, you and the others are just gonna have to like it or lump it.’
Thace shrugged and yawned hugely. ‘Mmmnh… You think I would protest? Here? This is your bed, after all.’
‘It’s a good bed.’ Keith let his head sag on Thace’s shoulder for a moment, but Kosmo whined again. ‘Unfortunately I have to get out of it and feed Fuzzbutt here. Also, last night was fucking amazing but we’re… kinda sticky. I could use a shower. And something to eat.’
‘Would you like me to go?’
At this, Keith grabbed Thace by the shoulders and kissed him urgently. ‘That answer your question? I want you to stay here till after breakfast, at least. I mean, I wanna talk to the others too but I want to have breakfast with just us. If… you want that?’
Thace’s smile was warm and soft and Keith almost couldn’t bear to be looked at like that. It was an answer, even before Thace spoke. ‘I’d be honoured.’
‘Great.’ Keith gave Thace an awkward smile, then sat up and stretched, locking his fingers together above his head and grimacing as his spine cracked agonizingly. ‘Jesus motherfucking christ, I am sore. No, don’t make that face, it’s not bad sore, just… wow, I feel like I was training for a week.’
‘Really?’ Thace stood up and offered a hand to help Keith off the bed, which Keith took. ‘I’ve left… rather a lot of bruises and bites on you.’
‘Yeah, I can feel them. Don’t worry, they’re fine, and by the look of you I gave as good as I got. No, I was worried about it hurting more, you know, inside.’
Thace immediately looked worried again. ‘Does it? I thought I’d taken enough time, you seemed slick enough, how do you feel?’
Keith laughed, rocking his hips from side to side a little. ‘It’ll be maybe a little achey for a while but nothing I can’t handle. No, it’s my thighs that’re gonna give me trouble and I don’t think there was anything you could do about that.’ He paused and then said, ‘My first boyfriend, he was proud that I hurt afterwards. You know, the whole “fuck me till I couldn’t walk for a week” thing?’
Thace said nothing for a moment, then said, ‘No. No, I don’t know that thing. And if I find this man we will absolutely have… words.’
‘Words are allowed but you’re not allowed to beat him up. Can’t have a diplomatic incident because of my sex life.’ They stepped into the bathroom and Keith said, ‘OK, now we have to try out this hot tub. It looks amazing. You go fill it up and I’ll feed Kosmo.’
Thace nodded and squeezed Keith’s hand - Keith was very aware of the attention on his naked backside as he went through the kitchen door. It was the work of a minute to get Kosmo his breakfast and rejoin Thace in the bathroom, in which time the huge tub was filling and the room was starting to fill with steam.
‘Oh, that looks nice,’ said Keith, mostly for want of something to say. Damn, Thace had a bite mark right over his nipple, had Keith done that? Some night…
Thace smiled. ‘Yes. In the meantime, Ulaz charged me with teaching you about this. Could you come and stand over here, please?’
He led Keith to a large, square tile in the corner, slightly raised from the rest, and had him step on it. ‘Now, if you would place your hand on this tile here-’
‘Which one? They’re all the same.’
‘No, this one with the rounded corners.’
‘Oh. Oh, yeah. OK.’
‘Now, say “initiate scan Omega 003”.’
Keith repeated the words and was immediately washed with blue light. Writing appeared on the tiles in front of him, proclaiming that he was Commandant Keith Kogane, Human, Origin Earth, 22 Decaphoebs, weight 53 glaishicks, clean health scan, next heat estimated within 3-4 movements, not pregnant.
Not pregnant. Keith breathed out sharply between his teeth and looked over at Thace, who looked resigned. As soon as he stepped off the scanner, the words vanished.
‘Hey, it’s OK. Next time, maybe?’
Thace smiled. ‘Maybe. Now, about that bath.’
The bath was heavenly, and Keith lingered maybe a little longer than he should have in the steaming, chest-deep water, leaning back against Thace's chest and listening to his rhythmic, comforting purr. When Thace offered to wash Keith's hair he accepted just because it had felt good when Kolivan had done it - it turned out to feel even better when Thace did it, and he was purring before he knew it.
Eventually, though, they had to get out, and Keith had to locate the tile Kolivan had pushed to get the towels - when he looked closely it turned out also to have rounded corners, and he got it right on the first try.
‘Oh, well done,’ said Thace, grabbing a towel and rubbing himself down vigorously. ‘Regris wondered if we should put lights on them but Ulaz said you'd pick it up quickly. What? Why are you laughing?’
‘You've fluffed up like a scared cat,’ said Keith. ‘Fuck, that’s nothing like last night.’
‘Is that bad?’
‘It's cute.’ Keith raised himself up on his tiptoes to kiss him, then went back to drying himself down and wrapping himself in one of the fluffy white robes from the rack.
He ignored his uniform, still in pieces on the floor, and took Thace's out of reach when he tried to pick it up. ‘No uniforms in my rooms. I'll explain when the others get here. Don't care what you wear, you can dress as an Oonulu pirate if you must, but no uniforms of any kind.’
Thace stared at him for a moment, then said slowly, ‘I can see you have a plan.’
‘Damn right I have a plan,’ said Keith, his head in the clothes generator. He emerged with a stack of fabric and grinned. ‘Your turn, I hope you have some ideas.’
‘A few,’ replied Thace. ‘Also, you should stand back from the bed.’
Keith, who was starting to expect this kind of thing by now, stood back and watched as Thace pulled a lever in the footboard and suddenly all the dirty bedlinen vanished into the headboard, then the mattress flipped, revealing a clean and perfectly-made bed. He raised his eyebrows at Thace.
‘If we ever get attacked I am totally using that as a trap.’
‘Your resourcefulness is one of the things I admire about you.’
‘Aw, that's so sweet, thankyou,’ said Keith. He dressed for the day in grey jeans, boxing boots and a green and blue hoodie with the logo of a sports company on the back, then went to retrieve several Mysterious Boxes from what he'd started to think of as the Stuff Generator. He found Thace in the kitchen comparing pans, wearing a long sleeveless tunic with a stiff collar, open down the front, over something with loose sleeves - currently rolled up to the elbow - and loose pants tucked into soft boots. The whole thing was mainly in shades of grey with gold embroidery that set off his eyes and made his fur look even more purple. Keith, arms full of boxes, watched him for a few seconds until Thace half-turned and smiled at him.
‘Are you coming in, my d- I mean, Keith?’
‘You can call me that if you want,’ said Keith. ‘ I can deal. You look great, by the way.’
‘Really? Thankyou - I think you will find that most of the Blades have worn some kind of uniform for most of their lives, and I include myself in that.’ By now, Thace had chosen a pan and started chopping strange alien vegetables, throwing things together as if he was barely thinking about it. ‘Before I was a Blade I spent much of my youth on a ship in the orbit of Olkarion.’
‘Oh, that explains the outfit.’
‘Yes. It was a lovely place. I wish things could have been different.’
‘You - we - did all we could,’ said Keith.
‘I know, but I can still wish. Now come here and taste this.’
Keith immediately went to Thace's side and was given a spoonful of some kind of scramble - it tasted tangy and a little peppery over the smoothness of the probably-eggs. ‘Good,’ he said, then Thace raised an eyebrow and he conceded, ‘Maybe needs something, I don't know, something not so strong?’
‘I thought you might say that,’ said Thace, and this time the spoon was topped with a liberal helping of what Keith was fairly sure was plain old Earth cheddar.
‘Way better,’ said Keith, licking the spoon. ‘How do you know about Earth dairy?’
‘How do you think anyone round here knows about Earth things? I talked to your mother.’
‘Oh, that makes sense. Speaking of Earth things, when you have a second, this is for you.’ Keith set down a small, square box on the counter, and Thace looked quizzically at it for a moment. It had his name on it.
He offered the spatula to Keith and said, ‘Please do not let this burn,’ and then opened the box. Inside was a large coffee mug, decorated with images of a clearly very angry man in combat. In some of the pictures he was wearing a very silly yellow and black outfit, so maybe that was the cause of his anger, or the fact that the blades protruding from his hands couldn't possibly be comfortable or practical. ‘Keith, I assume this is written in human?’ said Thace. ‘I can't read it.’
‘English, not human,’ said Keith. ‘It says “WOLVERINE”. That’s your designated mug.’
‘Oh.’ Thace stared at it some more. ‘So when you called me Purple Wolverine, you were saying I resemble -’
‘Him, only purple, yes.’
‘He looks extremely angry.’
‘Oh, sure. He's usually got something to bitch about. But he's also a total marshmallow.’ Keith watched the confusion on Thace's face and sighed. ‘He's really a nice guy. Also the resemblance is striking.’
‘If you say so,’ said Thace. ‘I, uh, thankyou. Did you get mugs for the others?’
‘Yes, and for mom, and myself.’ He handed the spatula back to Thace and produced a plain black mug with ‘I Love My Dog’ written in large blue letters around the base.
‘Appropriate, but it seems plain,’ said Thace, pulling some more ingredients from the food printer. Something in a bottle, a loaf of something, a few things that appeared to be spices…
Keith took the mug to the sink and said, ‘That's because you haven't seen the trick.’ Then he filled it with hot water and turned it so that Thace could see the picture of Kosmo, backed by stars, appear against the black.
Thace laughed. ‘I see. That's perfect. I expect the others fit just as well.’
‘Hope so, but you have to wait and see.’
Breakfast turned out to be the scramble on top of something that was somewhere between a grain and a bean in size and which Thace said was called carsu.
‘They eat this all the time on Arus. Not the side you were on, the other side, where they had harsher winters. You wouldn't believe where this thing will grow. But your side is too hot for it so their staple was hniki peb instead.’ Thace poured something steaming and purplish into both their mugs - Keith’s mug instantly displayed its Kosmo picture - then topped it with a creamy froth from a bowl and shook something which Keith could have sworn was blue sprinkles over the top. ‘And this is olfracta - the froth is seda midari and these,’ Thace rattled the shaker, ‘are macsus, they’re not strictly essential, the others have their own preferences, but I thought I’d show you my favourite first.’
Keith tried it. The drink tasted tart yet sweet, in the same way a berry pie would, and the foam mellowed it a little - the little blue things were more gingery than sweet but they served only to throw the taste of the drink into relief.
‘Oh, wow, that’s delicious,’ he said. ‘OK, the only reason I haven’t downed it in one is because it’s way too hot but seriously, you’re doomed now, I’m gonna want that all the time. You need to show me how to make it.’
Thace laughed. ‘I’d love to teach you anything you’d like.’
Breakfast passed with mostly conversations about food, several more mugs of olfracta and Thace producing a few more options for toppings - it turned out Keith’s favourite, even more than marshmallows, was Ooi, which were small crunchy white balls which tasted a little like warm icecream. They were apparently Antok’s favourite. Thace pronounced in favour of the marshmallows, but still remained loyal to mascus.
And then Keith summoned the others, with Krolia, to join them: ‘You can eat here but we’ve eaten, so bear that in mind. See you within the hour.’
Regris arrived first, about ten minutes later, grinning enthusiastically, and just like the last time he’d seen Keith, he swept him up in his arms and gave him a kiss to take his breath away. This time, when he let Keith up, Regris looked over his shoulder at Thace and said, ‘Everything alright? Do you want one too?’
‘Quite alright,’ said Thace, walking over and smearing his lips across Regris’s, quickly enough that Regris couldn’t quite reciprocate.
‘Tease,’ said Regris, and turned back to Keith. ‘How did it go?’
‘Uh, great,’ he said. ‘I’ll tell everyone when they get here, yeah?’
‘Got a taste for public speaking, huh?’
Keith winced. ‘More like, don’t really want to talk about it more than once. Thace, don’t give me that look, you know it was awesome, I just… we don’t talk about this shit so much on Earth. Or at least I don’t.’
Thace nodded. ‘I understand.’
‘In the meantime, I have a question for you guys.’ Both Galra just looked inquisitively at him, so Keith forged on. ‘What is with you two? Do you have a thing like Kolivan and Antok? I mean, Thace says he’s blown you before and then there was that thing just now, but-’
‘Oh, that,’ said Regris. ‘I don’t know if you’d go so far as to call it a thing. More like, alpha galra get raunchy even between ruts and you’d be surprised how bored you can get on a military base between missions.’
‘I really don’t think I would be surprised,’ said Keith.
‘But most of the galra here have had some level of casual sexual contact,’ said Thace. ‘We help with each others’ ruts, if sexual frustration runs too high that could be bad for the mission, and it’s bad for anyone to be touch-starved. I think until you took the Commandant position the only people who were exclusive were Antok - with Kolivan, who was not exclusive to him - and Krolia, who… honestly, I have no idea what Krolia does. I don’t think she’s shared a heat with anyone since the death of your father.’
Keith, who had been about to recoil from hearing about his mother’s sex life, grimaced. ‘But that can’t be healthy, right?’
Before Thace could answer, the doorbell rang, admitting Krolia herself, and Keith resolved to confront her about it later on. She hugged him and got herself breakfast from the food printer - something Keith didn’t even come close to recognising - and was almost done with it by the time Ulaz arrived, closely followed by Antok and Kolivan, who arrived together. All three of them declined food, saying that the reason for the delay had been that they hadn’t wanted to be the only ones sitting there eating.
‘Sure, that’s fine.’ said Keith. ‘How is everyone this morning?’
There was a cautious murmur of general assent from around the table, and the consensus that Keith appeared to be up to something. Krolia put that on the back burner for now, though, and said, ‘I think the important thing is, how are you? How did everything go?’
‘I’m fine,’ said Keith, finally relenting. ‘It was really, really nice. So much better than I thought it would be. I chose Thace… well, for a few reasons I don’t wanna discuss out in the open like this, but he took such good care of me. I might have stiff legs for a couple of days but that’s absolutely fine.’ He laughed a little. ‘Also I’m not pregnant this time.’
‘I had a feeling you might need this,’ said Ulaz, and slid a couple of jars across the table. ‘The blue one is a muscle rub, the big one with the orange writing is a bruise ointment. Let me know if you run out.’
‘Oh… thanks,’ Keith pocketed the jars.
‘Also you will likely find it harder to conceive outside your heat. Not impossible, but harder.’
‘Right, good to know.’
‘Thace, do you have anything to say?’ said Kolivan.
Thace took a deep breath. ‘He speaks too well of me - I think his expectations have been lowered enough that we would have to dig to find them. Yes, I did my best for him, but I would do my best for anyone, and expect that from them.’
‘It’s true,’ said Regris. ‘I tell you what, Keith, if you don’t make him your primary one day, I might steal him.’
Keith turned to Kolivan for explanation. ‘Primary?’
‘Yes, the Blade of Marmora as it is now is an example of a pack - back when there were thousands of us, each base was its own pack, or social group. But within that group, a breeding or family group is known as a circle. We - that is, all of us and Krolia-’
‘And Kosmo.’
Kolivan stared at Keith impassively for a second, then shrugged. ‘Alright, and the wolf too, we are your circle. But you are free to choose a primary if you wish. And a secondary too, if it pleases you.’
Keith narrowed his eyes. ‘Aren’t you and Antok primaries?’
‘No. Please cease this line of enquiry.’
Keith glanced at Antok. Of course he couldn’t tell anything from his face and his shoulders were calmly down, but his tail was thrashing. Hmm. Keith raised his eyebrows and changed the subject. ‘Well, I’m not ready to pick a primary. Besides, I have some new rules to lay down, I hope you’re ready. Thace, could you please get us some olfracta?’
‘Ancestors, I really have got you addicted,’ said Thace, but he left the table, returning with a huge steaming pot, a dish of seda midari and a forest of shakers, jars and bottles. No mugs, though, except for Keith’s Kosmo mug and his own Wolverine mug, which made Krolia bark a laugh as soon as she saw it.
‘Alright. So, first rule, here are your official mugs.’ Keith distributed the boxes. There was silence broken only by rustling cardboard for a moment, then Krolia said, ‘“World's Best Mom” aw, thankyou, Keith, that's so sweet. Antok, that says, “SUPERSIZE ME”.’
‘Ah,’ said Antok, who had been staring at the enormous blue mug in his hands as if he could learn to read in English by context alone.
‘These are all in human,’ said Ulaz. ‘May I use my tablet to translate?’
‘English, not human,’ said Keith. ‘And yes, just this once.’
Ulaz put his mug under the tablet and read aloud, ‘“I Hate Being Sexy But I Can’t Help It, I’m A Doctor”... I. Well. Keith, why did you give me this?’
‘Partly to make you make that face, to be honest.’
‘It’s a great face,’ said Regris, grinning over his mug, which was black and had no writing, only a smiling shark mouth.
‘It was a toss-up - I mean, a choice between that and another one. Yours too, actually, Regris, but you get another one if you knock me up so I guess you'll see then.’
Kolivan, who could read some English and who had opened his mug - garish leopard print with LEADER OF THE PACK in big pink letters - and handed it straight to Thace for filling, had no comment. He started adding some kind of gold drizzle and flakes of something black to the froth and said, ‘And so what is the next rule?’
‘Kosmo is allowed anywhere he likes, including the bed. Unless there's actually fucking happening, you can kick him out then, or you can kick him out of the kitchen when you're cooking. Only ask nicely, he’s family.’
‘So if I'm in the bath and he comes in to stare-’ began Regris.
‘He won't,’ said Keith. ‘Not unless it's important.’
‘He's actually a very well-mannered wolf,’ said Krolia.
‘I will take your word for it,’ said Ulaz. ‘So what’s this next rule, Keith?’
‘Good question, Ulaz,’ said Keith. ‘This is arguably the most important one. While you're in my rooms, no uniforms. If you're gonna be here for only like five minutes, you don't have to change, but you can't wear any sort of uniform if you intend to stay.’ Keith caught Antok's eye, or rather the set of his shoulders, and added, ‘Masks don't count.’
Antok visibly relaxed, but he did say, ‘May I ask why?’
Keith was about to reply, but he was interrupted by Regris. ‘Keith, I don't have any civilian clothes. I was raised on a Marmora base, I've always worn either a uniform or a disguise!’
‘That's basically why,’ said Keith, standing up and collecting something from the kitchen counter. ‘I've lived on a military base and had every damn second of my time doled out for one thing or another. My kids might be raised as Blades but we're not at war anymore and when they're done training they get to come here, dress like ordinary kids and be done for the day. And you guys don't get to fuck that up by wandering around after hours still being their commanding officers. In here, you're family.’
‘Ancestors, I wish you'd been around when I was a hatchling,’ said Regris dreamily.
‘Also unless the doors are locked, you all can come and go as you like.’
Kolivan's brows shot up. ‘Really? I would have thought you would prefer your space.’
‘If I want my space I will lock the door. I've been in crowded places ever since I was eight - the group home, foster homes, the Garrison - I'm shit at socialising but I was lonely in the desert.’
Krolia made a little distressed noise at that. ‘I’m so sorry, I shouldn't have left,’ she said.
‘Mom, please stop saying that like you had much of a choice. I already forgave you. Regris, as for you…’ Keith leaned over the table and pitched a pile of green fabric into Regris’s lap. He unfolded it, and curiosity became wondering laughter.
‘Is this… Is it the corky-dile you were talking about?’
Keith grinned and nodded. ‘Crocodile. Yep! Now we can be dangerous Nile predators together.’
‘Oh, yes! I’m gonna put this on now!’
He vanished into the bathroom and Kolivan dropped his head into his hand. ‘Sweet mother of stars, it's contagious…’
Keith grinned and licked his froth moustache from his top lip. ‘So I could wait till Regris comes back but this next rule depends on Thace and I haven’t asked him yet.’
Thace, surprised, turned to look at him. ‘What is it? I don’t expect it can be that hard.’
‘At least one meal per week in here, cooked by you. Everyone else can offer cuisine a la them if they want but I like your cooking, and I feel like it’s important to eat together, especially for a family.’
Thace, for a moment, looked like he was about to cry. ‘I’d love to do that. Of course. You didn’t even have to ask.’
‘You know he'd cook for you every day,’ said Krolia, hands wrapped around her mug.
‘What did I miss?’ said Regris, coming in wearing the frankly ridiculous croc onesie, which enclosed his tail perfectly, ringed his face in unconvincing felt teeth and gave him a ridge of soft green spikes from the top of his hood all the way to the end of his tail. ‘This thing is so comfortable. I absolutely see your point.’
‘Suits you,’ said Keith. ‘Also just saying that the last rule is we’re having at least one meal a week in here with everyone, cooked by Thace. But if you want to cook for us that’s fine too.’
‘You don’t want my cooking,’ said Regris. ‘Aardru food is basically fish, seaweed and salt. I have to put extra salt into everything Thace gives me. Here, look.’ He extracted one of the tiny square crystals that he’d scattered liberally on his olfracta and handed it to Keith. Keith tasted it and wasn’t at all surprised to find that it was a salt crystal.
‘Ew,’ he said. ‘Point made. So that's it for rules. Any questions, anyone?’
There was a short silence, broken by Antok, of all people. ‘One thing I know is not my business since I have no chance here, but I think we should establish who will be staying with you tonight.’
‘“You have no chance here”?’ Keith frowned. ‘What the hell do you mean? Are you saying I don't like you or something?’
‘Not at all - only that I am accompanying Ezor and Zethrid on a recruitment mission and we leave this afternoon. I will be at your service on my return, though.’
‘Oh. Cool.’ A thought occurred to Keith. ‘Do I have to include the new recruits here if they're alphas?’
‘As has been stated, you need not do anything with anyone you do not wish,’ said Kolivan.
‘Great. Well in that case I've slept with Kolivan and Thace so I guess now it's Ulaz’s turn. Regris tomorrow and presumably Antok should be back by the day after so we can stick to that rotation if you like.’
‘But before we leave, you should attempt the blade ritual again,’ said Antok, huge hands almost obscuring his mug as they wrapped around it. ‘There are other missions which you are welcome to be part of if you wish, but you should have a blade.’
Keith perked up and drained his mug in one go. ‘Right, yes! I feel good about this one. I think it’s going to go right.’
A couple of hours later, changed into a clean uniform and holding his head high, Keith strode into the main hall once more. It seemed brighter somehow - he looked up, and it was brighter; Daibazaal was moving away from its parent star and filling the room with light. Keith spared a glance to the side where Thace was standing and a little upward twitch of his mouth, but otherwise didn’t react until he was standing in front of Kolivan.
‘Commandant Keith,’ said Kolivan, as he had before. Keith let the words wash over him until Kolivan got to, ‘You may begin when you are ready. Do what you must.’
Keith nodded, held the rock out and this time didn’t think of the blade at all. Instead he thought first of Thace, and how gentle and kind he’d been, how he’d soothed away all his fears and replaced them with only pleasure. The way he smelled like home and comfort, and then he imagined a child that looked like part himself and part Thace - or a serious child like Kolivan, who’d probably take to protecting their siblings like a duck to water. He thought of the big empty apartment full of people - full of children and family - and himself protecting them and seeing that they were raised right. And then he took a deep breath and confronted the mental image of himself actually pregnant - and found it wasn’t so terrifying after all, because his alphas would take care of him and see he was safe and happy.
In his hand, the rock glowed brightly, changed shape and became a knife. It wasn’t quite the same knife as he’d had before - this one was single-bladed, and serrated along the back edge like a short fishing knife. He barely had time to examine it, though, before it changed again into a large, upcurved thing weighted heavily towards the blade - a machete, only bigger and sharper at the tip.
Keith slashed it through the air a few times, grinning in satisfaction, then saluted Kolivan.
‘He has awakened his blade once again!’ shouted Kolivan, and everyone cheered.
There had been a celebration meal in the middle of the day, in one of the smaller meeting rooms so that Antok, Zethrid and Ezor could attend. Keith was very reticent about letting Zethrid and Ezor get their hands on his blade again but they only slapped him on the back, congratulated him heartily and made no move to touch it.
Krolia, though, examined it thoroughly as soon as it was put in her hands - of course Keith sought her opinion first - and pronounced it a fine blade, and how glad she was that Keith finally had one that was truly his own. ‘And now you can go on any mission you want, isn't that right, Kolivan?’
Kolivan smirked a little. ‘With very few exceptions, yes. In fact, I was going to invite you to accompany your mother and I to New Altea in a few days to ask the Red Paladin about the teleduv project.’
Keith went still, smile draining off his face. ‘Uh. Wow. I… would love to do that, but I'm definitely not ready for Shiro to know where I am. Lance will definitely tell him.’
‘I can make sure everyone we will see understands the importance of silence on that matter.’
‘Really? Well… Great, then sure, I'll come. Oh, one question.’
‘I am aware that the wolf goes where you do,' said Kolivan, and Keith beamed in relief. Antok made sure he inspected the blade carefully before he left, but said nothing, only nodded, then slipped away with the two newest Blades in his wake.
The celebration went on for most of the afternoon, complete with Keith testing his new weapon in sparring matches with everyone there - he won against Regris, everyone else beat him, although only Krolia in under thirty seconds. Finally, though, the day came to an end, and it was only himself and Ulaz in his quarters. They'd arrived here in uniform but Keith had produced track pants, hoodies and thick socks for both of them almost the instant they'd walked in. He had only got as far as stripping down to his underwear before Ulaz had stopped him.
‘Ulaz, look, nothing personal, but I'm dead tired and fucking sore, I'm really not up to fucking tonight.’
‘What?’ Ulaz looked taken aback. ‘Oh - Keith, I'm sorry, of course I know that. I don't expect that of you. But even though you didn't need time in the pods, you have sustained a considerable number of minor injuries. Let me see to them for you.’
Keith paused, a refusal on the tip of his tongue, but he bit it back and said, ‘Would it make you feel better?’
‘Naturally. I am both an alpha and a doctor. Seeing you hurt goes against both nature and nurture for me.’
‘Oh, it's like that, huh?’ Keith shrugged. ‘Well, OK then, do what you gotta. Where do you want me?’
Ulaz, who was busy at the Stuff Generator, said, ‘Just sit on the edge of the bed for now.’ He had only dressed as far as the dark blue track pants, which hung low on his hips and exposed a long, sinewy back and the fact that the mohawk did, in fact, go all the way down. He turned back with a pump bottle in his hand, and set it beside the jars on the hopeless nightstand before climbing up to sit behind Keith on the bed. Keith expected his touch to be cold and clinical and he tensed for it - his hands were cool with whatever was in the bottle, but his touch was both sure and gentle, firmly soothing away all Keith's little hurts. Keith gave a shuddering little sigh and started to relax. He may even have begun to purr just a little.
‘That's it,’ Ulaz, more softly than Keith had ever heard. ‘You're so tense. Let it go.’
Keith just nodded and let Ulaz work his magic. Eventually he said, ‘Keith? Can you lie down on your front for me? If you have any bruises on your hips we could get rid of your underwear, I promise I won't push the issue.’
Keith, who was so relaxed he probably couldn't get an erection if Ulaz blew him, kicked off his boxers and rolled over onto his face. ‘You know I'm gonna fall asleep like this.’
‘Then I shall turn you over to prevent you from suffocating and repeat this process on your front while you sleep.’
‘Mm. Sounds nice. So let me get this straight. Alphas get off on… looking after omegas?’
‘You could say that. It's a big part of our instinctive drive, just as omegas have a tendency towards defending their home and loved ones, a strong pull towards home and family and selflessness often to their own detriment. It's pure coincidence that you are seeing the Marmora as stacked towards alphas as it is; omegas actually make very good Blades.’
By now, Ulaz was running his hands over the backs of Keith's thighs and honestly Keith wished he'd dig his thumbs in a bit, but he only said, ‘Sure. So that explains why Thace lights up like a Christmas tree whenever I ask him to cook for me.’
‘And to a lesser degree, why Regris is so delighted when you include him in casually friendly flirting. He believes you have enough pressure on you and that you need a friend. I'm inclined to believe he's right.’
Keith snorted sleepily. ‘Not just a pretty airhead, huh?’
‘Far from a pretty airhead. Regris is one of the most astonishing minds on the base.’ Ulaz switched to the jar of bruise ointment - a greasy, tealish glop that felt a little buttery against Keith's skin. ‘So tell me, what is a Christmas tree? I assume a tree with lights on it?’
Keith chuckled. ‘Yeah - on Earth we have this winter celebration called Christmas. You have a feast, gifts, parties, and for some reason a tree with a bunch of decorations and lights and a star or a fairy on top. No, I don't actually know why either but that's what we have. The one at the care home was always made of fraying silver tinsel and the gifts were donated, not that they were any good. One year I got an electric toothbrush, what kind of gift is that for an eleven-year-old?’
All at once, Ulaz's nose and lips were against Keith's neck and he was releasing all the tension he hadn't realised he'd built up, so fast, in the course of two sentences. But he had a family now, an entire circle of alphas, and he was never going to be the grieving kid in the care home, the delinquent at the Garrison, the mourning desert hermit ever again.
‘Keith?’ said Ulaz, very close to his ear. ‘You're crying, are you alright?'
‘Yeah,’ said Keith, sitting up and putting his arms around Ulaz. Ulaz held him close, scenting him and stroking his back while the tears fell. It didn't last long, and soon he was sitting back and wiping his eyes on the heel of his hand. ‘I feel like I've been doing more crying since I came here than in the rest of my entire adult life put together.’
Ulaz smiled. ‘That bodes well for your trust in us. Maybe it helps that you are being scented more now?’
‘Yeah, that could be it. Thanks, Ulaz, I really needed that.’
Ulaz looked almost flustered for a moment, then he said, ‘Any time you need it, I assure you, it's no trouble. Shall we continue? Your front, now?’
‘Promise not to make any smart comments if I pop a woodie,’ said Keith, lying back against the pillows. He waited a beat, then said, ‘If I get hard.’
‘Oh. How silly of me, I should have guessed that one from context. Of course not, I'm not Regris, am I?’
‘Sometimes it's nice to have a grown-up around,’ said Keith. ‘Although to be honest I didn't think you'd be like this. This… I dunno, soft isn't the right word. Gentle? Eh, nearly. Sorry, I'm not good with words, I'm just used to you having either your serious doctor face or your serious spy face on every time I see you.’
Ulaz paused, then started smoothing the clear pinkish wound gel into a long shallow slash that started near Keith's right shoulder and ended just below his left nipple. Inflicted, Keith remembered, by Ulaz himself, who had overpowered him but had had to fight hard to do so and might not have done it if he wasn't already scuffed up and tired from sparring with Kolivan. ‘I admit I have been attempting to keep some level of distance.’
Keith's brows shot up. ‘Why? If you don't want to be in this circle you don't have to, nobody's forcing you - are they? I mean, nobody's forcing me, it wouldn't be fair if-’
He was stopped by Ulaz’s lips against his own - a brief, unsensual kiss, purely to stop him talking and get his attention. It worked. ‘Nobody is forcing me to be here. Kolivan had to run every aspect of this past me and get my approval, if I had wanted to remain as medical supervisor and not be involved myself I would have.’ He got some more gel and started working on a broad scrape on Keith's bicep, caused when Regris had thrown him across the room.
‘So what's the problem?’ said Keith.
‘It's not good for either the patient or the doctor to have too close a relationship. Doubly so for a counsellor, and although I knew you were attractive I underestimated the effect you would have on me once you were here. I am far closer to falling than I am comfortable with.’
Keith considered this. ‘OK. That's fair. But like, I like having you as my doctor. I trust you.’
Ulaz sagged a little. ‘Oh, Keith, why must you say that when you can see my face? I… Alright, but I still can't be your therapist and we still need more doctors here than just me.’
‘Is that where Antok's gone?’
‘Primarily, yes.’ Ulaz switched to the bruise ointment and started rubbing it into the purpling mark on Keith's side where Regris's tail had caught him. ‘We're a peacekeeping organization now and so we need more doctors and diplomats than we have warriors. It's a state of affairs I wouldn't have dared dream of two years ago, and you and your friends brought us here.’
Keith raised a languid hand and stroked Ulaz's cheek. ‘Hey. We couldn't have done it without the Blades of Marmora. And most of them died in the fight, too.’
Ulaz paused, head bowed, hands resting on Keith's waist. ‘Yes,’ he said. ‘But they all knew that they died for freedom, even if they didn't live to see it. I am one of the lucky ones. The inexpressibly lucky ones.’
‘Yeah,’ whispered Keith, running his fingers through as much of Ulaz's hair as he could reach. He gave it a little tug, smiling, and Ulaz leaned down into his arms and kissed him, long and slow and right, and Keith knew that he, too, was one of the lucky ones.
Notes:
I was going to post this three days ago - I'm glad I didn't, because in the end it turned out to be far from finished. Thanks everyone for your patience this past couple of months - my hayfever has been improving but I've been extremely tired due to my anti-histamines, and a little while ago I actually overdosed and ended up in the A&E!
Anyway, I had a good long think about how Keith's blade should look now, but I didn't want it to look like the old one, partly because that was *Krolia's* blade, and partly because Keith isn't a soldier anymore so he needs something more practical than a longsword. Something you can use to build or clear paths or, should you wish, to cook. I very nearly gave him a Chinese cleaver like the one Li Ziqi uses in her videos but that would be too much of a departure, he can have a bowie knife instead.
The mugs Keith gave himself, Thace, Antok, Krolia and Kolivan were made up, but this is Ulaz's: https://www.teepublic.com/mug/477070-sexy-doctor and this is Regris's: https://www.spreadshirt.co.uk/toothy+smile+full+colour+mug-D16057176#?redirectFrom=en_IE&redirectToken=toothy+smile+full+colour+mug-D16057176&affiliateId=323148.
All of you are definitely seeing my inner anthropologist here, holy shit. I have a tendency to go off the rails a little and start explaining about history of textile manufacture or whatever shit when it doesn't have the slightest bearing on the plot - here we're getting a lot of food and fashion blithering, but also tons of other stuff like the usual A/O biology crap (for the record we don't actually have betas in this universe. Ignore my other current Marmora story, that's not canon here, nor will Vrek be showing up), and so forth. If you feel any of this is a waste of time and gets in the way of the plot, let me know in the comments. Conversely, if you want me to just spout random universe facts at you, let me know in the comments!
Chapter 5: Finish What We Started
Summary:
In which Keith and Kolivan work through some of their issues, and there is a trip to New Altea to discuss plans with Lance - who is in a startlingly bad way.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Antok had not returned by the time Kolivan’s turn came to spend the night with Keith, but Kolivan had received regular messages - the fame of the Marmora’s role in freeing the universe had spread, and Antok and his team were dealing with more volunteers than they had anticipated.
‘Are you giving them all the same Trial I had?’ asked Keith, packing a bag for the following day’s trip to New Altea as Kolivan inspected the latest list Antok had sent him.
‘Of course, but it means a different thing for everyone. You did not only conquer your fellow Blades that day, but also your greatest fear, which was that you might never find out who you are. But to do that you had to also face your other great fear of abandonment.’
‘Mm.’ Keith frowned and shoved a grey jacket into his bag.
‘I will not make you discuss it,’ said Kolivan.
‘Cool,’ said Keith, eyes steadfastly fixed on his bag..
Kolivan waited for further comments that didn’t come, then said, ‘Keith, if you wish to have one of the others stay, please don’t feel obliged to have me here. Or you are entitled to time alone if you feel you are ready.’
An uncomfortable awkwardness hung in the air until Keith finally forced himself to say, ‘Kolivan, I’m sorry I yelled at you, you were right. I should’ve trusted you.’
And there it was, the source of the distance and the discomfort. Kolivan simply smiled and said, ‘I accept your apology, but there is still a great deal you don’t know, both about us and about your situation, so it is natural that you fear. You owe your circle no trust. It’s up to us to show you that we are deserving of your faith in us.
‘Sure, but that’s the job,’ said Keith. ‘Thace said it was your duty as my alphas to look after me. Mom said that too, in fact, long before I even knew I could do this as a military position. That’s right, isn’t it?’
Kolivan, who had been leaning on the bedpost, sat down on the bed. ‘That’s true, but sadly it has not always been that way for those in your position. The Blade of Marmora has been in operation for almost as long as the Galran Empire, and war causes savagery on both sides.’
‘Tell me,’ said Keith, holding a pair of jeans in front of him like a shield.
‘The Blades as an organization is almost as old as the Empire, and your position is even older than that. But the Marmora have had hundreds and thousands of leaders and many different philosophies. Sometimes you might say we were nearly as bad as Zarkon, in our way, but war is war, and especially at the start we were more rage than anything else.’
‘You say “we” - were you there?’
‘No. Antok is the oldest living Blade and he’s the equivalent of eighty-seven Earth years. Krolia said you would ask so we all sat down and worked it out. I was born on a galra mining ship in the Fernaxs sector. I would be around fifty-nine years old.’’
Keith’s eyes widened. ‘Wow. I’m twenty-two, I feel like a kid. Eighty-seven? Really?’
‘Our lifespans are likely wildly different from human expectations - Ulaz, Thace and I are the only pureblood galra here so we probably all age at very different rates. I shouldn’t worry. If you are, you should talk to Ulaz about it later.’
‘Yeah… yeah, I’ll do that,’ said Keith. ‘Anyway, you were saying. War is war, rage, that stuff? What was that title that meant Breeder of Marmora, anyway?’
‘Aghammara Marmora,’ replied Kolivan. ‘And there have been a lot. Ten thousand years is a long, long time. So in that time, some leaders - especially the early ones - thought that since the ultimate goal was to get new soldiers for the rebellion, the Aghammara Marmora could be a prisoner of war, and so long as their health needs were met it didn’t matter whether they were happy or whether the experience itself was enjoyable.’
Keith shuddered. ‘I… gotta admit I pictured something like that,’ he said.
‘I anticipated you might. Well, over time it turned out that those Aghammara weren’t as healthy and neither were their children, they spent more time recovering from injury and difficult births, child survival rate wasn’t as high, their children were less loyal and harder to train, and much higher rates of depression, suicide and defection in the children, the Aghammara - and also in the alphas, too. It was eventually realised that the Marmora were essentially behaving like Zarkon and his kind, and the Aghammara Marmora should be a position of respect, taken voluntarily, and it should be a point of pride for an alpha who satisfies the Aghammara - after all, if I don’t, if we don’t, you might want to stop, yes?’
‘Huh,’ said Keith, who hadn’t thought of that. ‘So the less fun I have the closer to Empire you guys get?’
‘That is… one way of looking at it.’
‘So… did it work?’
‘Not all at once. These things don’t. But it didn’t take long before it was considered unthinkable to treat the Aghammara Marmora the way they used to. And it turned out to be good for everyone, not just the omega concerned - the group bonded better, they were less distracted, there was someone to mediate the petty personal disputes that the Leader hates so much.'
Keith raised his head. ‘Wait, what? Is that my job now?’
Kolivan smiled and reached out to caress Keith’s cheek - his smile broadened when Keith not only didn’t pull away, but leaned into his palm. ‘Only for your children, Commandant. They are going to be yours, after all. The records say that sometimes in the Marmora’s heyday there would be two or even three Aghammara in the group, each with a select circle of alphas, and in charge of their own offspring. But you are the only one here.’
‘I… right. Wow, that’s a lot to wrap my head around.’
There was the split-second of confusion as Kolivan’s face went from bafflement to inferring from context, and moved on to the next thought. ‘So just to clarify - are we, as you say, good?’
Keith laughed, zipped his bag closed and dumped it on the floor, then climbed on the bed so he could crawl into Kolivan’s lap, cradling the big scarred face between his hands. ‘Oh my god, look at you, you’re so big and serious the whole time, how the hell are you this cute? Yes, of course we’re good.’
The kiss was slow and careful - there was a lot to explore - and it devolved into a lot of further, smaller kisses, traded back and forth before either of them was ready to stop.
‘Do we have to leave first thing tomorrow?’ asked Keith, forehead resting against Kolivan’s.
‘I’m afraid so,’ replied Kolivan. ‘They’ll be expecting us. But you can get a nap in the back of the ship if you really must. Why, are you anticipating a poor night’s sleep?’
‘The worst,’ Keith trailed his fingers down the side of Kolivan’s neck and was delighted to see the Blade leader’s eyelids drop for a second. ‘I think you should finish what we started. I’m not scared now, and I’m not trying to get it over with. I still think your fangs are hot, though.’
‘I still refuse to draw your blood with them.’
‘Just let me suck on them some more. And please don’t be gentle, I’ve been with two Blades so far, one of them treated me like a porcelain doll, the other one manhandled me a bit and I know what I like better.’
Kolivan’s brow creased. ‘Two? But I thought-’
‘Yeah, I haven’t fucked Ulaz yet, I was way too tired after all that sparring.’ Keith lost patience with this line of conversation and started pushing his hands up the front of Kolivan’s top - very like the first loose, wide-necked cotton top, only this one was dark grey. ‘Hey Kolivan, do you think you’re ever gonna tell me what you wanted to do with me? Or is it just a sick fantasy for your own mind alone?’
Kolivan laughed and buried his nose against Keith’s neck - he shivered and lifted his chin to allow easier access. ‘I could tell you, but I don’t know if you trust me.’
‘I trust you, tell me.’
‘Do you though?’ said Kolivan, spreading little kisses alon Keith’s jaw and then pulling back to look at him. ‘You don’t act as though you do. Almost every mission I send you on I have to account for the fact that you will not trust that I know what I am doing, and will recklessly go your own way.’
‘Well, I-’
‘If only, for once in our lives, I could make you follow orders.’
‘Oh.’ Keith stared at him, eyes wide, a little smile playing around his lips. ‘Oh, well. Why didn’t you just say so?’ He pressed his lips to Kolivan’s, then sat back on his hands, smirking, and said, ‘Awaiting orders, Sir.’
Kolivan looked him up and down. ‘Insolent kit. You will tell me to stop if I hurt you.’
‘Even if I like it?’
‘If I want to hurt you pleasurably I will tell you first. If I hurt you without warning you, tell me to stop.’ Kolivan waited. There was no reply, so he sighed shortly and snapped, ‘This won’t do. On your knees in the middle of the bed. When I speak to you you reply so I know you understood.’
‘Oh. Yes, Sir.’ Keith scrambled to get to his knees. ‘Yes, I will tell you if you hurt me, Sir.’
‘Very good. You also tell me if you want to rest, or you need anything, however small. I am your alpha. I look after you. What am I?’
‘You are my alpha who looks after me, Sir,’ replied Keith, dutifully, watching Kolivan carefully and wishing he’d get on with it.
Luckily, Kolivan was not in the habit of fucking around. ‘Now undress and pass me your clothes.’
‘Yes, Sir.’ It wouldn’t have occurred to Keith to make a show of divesting himself of the black jeans and t-shirt he was wearing and the boxers and socks underneath, and Kolivan simply took it all without comment, folded them and put them on the floor by the bed. And then he looked Keith critically up and down with the air of one appraising a work of fine art - Keith could almost feel the pupilless gaze on him, assessing the pallor of his skin, every scar, all the ring-shaped suck-marks on his inner thighs that Regris had given him the night before, the bruises in various shades of healing on his hips and the scratches down his back. But he stared straight ahead and said nothing, even as he started to get hard and the slick started to leak down his thighs.
‘Touch yourself,’ said Kolivan.
‘Wh-’ began Keith, but Kolivan’s expression turned, not to anger, but to disappointment, which was much worse, so he said, ‘Yes, Sir,’ and started smearing slick along his cock as Kolivan stripped, never taking those blank yellow eyes off him. By the time he was jerking himself to full hardness, Kolivan was magnificently naked and Keith, even though he knew the mechanics of this by now, was still looking at his cock and having doubts.
He’d thought he was good at hiding his emotions, but it seemed Kolivan could see right through him, because he took one look at Keith’s face and said, ‘You look apprehensive. Tell me what is worrying you.’
Keith considered denying it, but he was here to follow orders, wasn’t he? He swallowed and said, ‘You’re… way bigger than Thace. I trust you, Sir! It’s just… a lot.’
Kolivan nodded. ‘I see. Spread your legs, kit.’
‘Yes, Sir.’ Keith, biting his lip a little at the nickname, parted his knees, aware of just how wet and open he was.
Kolivan climbed up onto the bed and ran his hand up the insides of Keith’s thighs, noting the still-tender sucker marks - Regris had indeed turned out to have a weird alien tentacle, and what’s more it was entirely prehensile. Sex with him had been exciting to say the least. ‘I see Regris showed you an interesting time,’ said Kolivan, a twitch of amusement at the corner of his mouth.
‘Yes, Sir, he did,’ replied Keith. ‘He’s the only one so far not to treat me like I’m some kind of fragile breakable doll, it was refreshing.’
‘I’ll bet.’ Then Kolivan dragged two fingers through the slick between Keith’s legs and brought it up to his lips. ‘Lick.’ Keith obeyed instantly, sucking the broad, cool digits into his mouth and licking them thoroughly clean. ‘I don’t intend to treat you as if you’re fragile,’ said Kolivan, watching him work. ‘But I will take my time and I won’t hurt you without reason.’ His fingertips came free with a pop and he stroked them across Keith’s lower lip. ‘Do you understand?’
‘Yes Sir.’ This time it was almost a whisper.
Kolivan stood up, so that Keith’s head was now level with his impressive erection. ‘Taste it, kit.’
Keith leaned forward, breathing hard, and swiped his tongue up Kolivan’s dick, then gasped, ‘Oh, fuck. Sir, I have to stop. I can’t take that.’
Kolivan instantly dropped to his knees and drew Keith into his arms - he was shaking like a leaf - and scented him thoroughly. ‘Hush, shh, it’s alright, be calm. I have you.’ Gradually, the shaking stopped, Keith’s breathing evened out again and he was merely slumped against Kolivan’s shoulder, eyes closed. ‘Keith?’ Keith nodded. ‘Can you tell me what happened?’
There was a long, tense silence, and finally Keith replied, ‘When I was in heat - he fucked my throat. I choked but he didn’t care, it just made him laugh. I thought I’d die there. The next day he kept trying to make me talk in front of other people so they’d hear how hoarse I was.’
There was no need to say who. Kolivan, even grimmer-faced than usual, stroked Keith’s hair and said softly, ‘I would never make you do anything I thought you could not handle. And in bed I would not ask you to do anything I thought you would not find pleasurable. I was never going to make you attempt that.’
Keith nodded. ‘Kay.’
Kolivan leaned down and dropped a kiss on his forehead. ‘Are you done for tonight?’
Silence, and Keith held on tightly to Kolivan and buried his face in the crook of his neck, breathing him in deeply until his breaths slowed and his heartbeat calmed down properly. Anyone who wasn’t Kolivan would have thought he’d fallen asleep after a while, and even with his head on Kolivan’s shoulder it was still hard to catch the faint murmurs under Keith’s breath: ‘You are my alpha, you take care of me. You are my alpha, you take care of me.’
Kolivan stroked Keith’s hair and wound it round his fingers - it had got so thick and long, past his shoulders, since his Trial, and only the fact that it made springy, obstinate curls at the back of his neck stopped it from reaching as far as his shoulderblades. The tension in Keith’s body released at Kolivan’s touch and he smiled blissfully and said softly, ‘OK. Yeah, OK, I’m good to go. Sir. That’s really nice.’
‘Your hair is very attractive,’ replied Kolivan, still winding fat black curls around his fingers and scratching absently at the nape of Keith’s neck. ‘And I fear I have mistaken the mood a little - you will have to excuse me, I am also new at this particular way of doing things.’
‘You’re not telling me you’ve never had an omega before. Or are you saying you’ve never had a sub before?’
Kolivan frowned. ‘What… is a sub?’
‘Well… this,’ said Keith, gesturing to himself. ‘You’re the dom, you give the orders, I’m the sub, I follow them. That’s more or less the nearest thing humans have to alphas and omegas except I think it’s nearly always sexy. I mean I’m not an expert or anything, I watched a bunch of porn but that’s about it.’
‘Oh.’ Kolivan thought about it. ‘I have had many omega partners before and, in fact, several alpha too. But no. I have never really wanted to do this before.’ He smiled wryly. ‘You bring out strange urges in me, kit.’
Keith shivered theatrically. ‘Urges, ooh. We’d better explore them, then. Should I get on my knees again?’
‘No,’ replied Kolivan. ‘You should stay exactly where you are, right here in my lap.’
Keith opened his mouth to say ‘Yes Sir’ but it was kissed right off his lips, so he opened his mouth willingly into the kiss, felt out the shape of the magnificent fangs with his tongue and wrapped his arms and legs around Kolivan as he did so - by the time they parted, both of them panting for breath and dripping with slick, he could feel Kolivan’s erection, iron-hard against his own. Without thinking, he dived back in for another kiss and rocked his hips against Kolivan as hard as he could.
Kolivan scraped his nails down Keith’s back, just hard enough for him to feel the edge, and Keith moaned, deep in the back of his throat. ‘Harder - mark me up a little, c’mon!’
Kolivan gave Keith a little shake at that. ‘Who is in charge here? You’re forgetting your place, kit.’
‘You are, Sir, you’re in charge, you’re my alpha but maybe you should give me something so I remember that tomorrow, hey?’
Keith flashed Kolivan a quick smirk, and Kolivan rolled his eyes - it was amazing how much of the entire face was involved in the gesture, that you didn’t notice until the eyes themselves were taken out of the picture. ‘Oh, you’ll remember tomorrow. Kneel up.’
Keith obeyed, rising to his knees with his legs straddling Kolivan’s meaty thighs, wet and needing to be touched. And Kolivan gave him what he’d asked for, a scrape of nails down his back, enough now to draw five thin red lines and make Keith arch back, keening between gritted teeth.
‘Oh god. Thankyou, Sir, that’s the stuff. Oh, yeah.’
‘It is nice to be appreciated,’ replied Kolivan solemnly, then ducked his head and sucked hard at the side of Keith’s neck - his throat and shoulders were rapidly filling up with round bruises in various shades of fading, and this one was another for the collection. Then he slipped one hand up Keith’s inner thigh, rubbing the tip of his index finger in the slick to listen to the wet sound it made before sliding the finger in and wrapping the other hand around Keith’s cock. Keith let out a long, shuddering sigh and tipped his head back, instinctively hugging Kolivan’s head with both hands.
‘Oh, my god,’ he whispered. ‘That’s so good, so fucking good, aaahh…’
Kolivan only purred against the hickey he’d made, and Keith’s knees buckled a bit - if he hadn’t been leaning on Kolivan he’d have gone down. As soon as it was clear that Keith wasn’t going to fall, Kolivan gave him a second finger - it was a bit of a tight fit, but not too bad, and he started moving his other hand too so Keith was extremely distracted and couldn’t do much else but whine and buck and tug on Kolivan’s braid.
Kolivan kissed wetly around Keith’s collarbone, both hands working faster - he let go of Keith’s dick once to gather slick from his own, and Keith yipped so indignantly that Kolivan couldn’t help but laugh as he resumed his rhythm, working Keith higher and higher until he came with a taut spine and an incoherent cry, then slumped against Kolivan’s chest.
Kolivan cleaned off his hands and rolled Keith over, a floppy heap on his back, and Keith gazed up at him, uncaring of the sweaty black hair hanging in his eyes. ‘Hey Kol,’ he murmured, then caught himself. ‘I mean Kolivan. I mean Sir. I mean… fuck. That was awesome.’
Kolivan considered the nickname. ‘Call me that if you wish, only I would appreciate it if you kept it between ourselves.’
‘’Kay. I can do that.’ Keith smiled and stretched, and Kolivan smiled back.
‘Is this enough for you for tonight? We don’t have to go for knot every time if you do not wish.’
Keith snorted. ‘Hell, no, this is just me recovering. I will be up again before you know it so don’t think you’re getting out of this that easily.’
‘I shouldn’t dream of it.’ Kolivan leaned over Keith’s prone form and closed his lips over Keith’s - Keith raised his chin to accept the kiss, long and leisurely and demanding nothing at all, and both of them pulled away smiling. ‘I must say that much as I like having you obey my orders, it’s also very nice to have you like this.’
‘Covered in come and waiting to get fucked?’
‘Smart mouth. Although that is indeed an enticing sight. No, I mean like this, smiling and relaxed and seeming happy at my hands, although far be it from me to tell whether you are.’
Keith blinked at him in surprise, and started to consider the question, then focussed on Kolivan’s face again. ‘You know what, I think the best answer I can give you right now is: if I think hard about it I won’t be, but eventually? I think I will be. Now hand me that water bottle and then I think you should distract me.’
‘I think,’ said Kolivan, passing him the water bottle, ‘That you are absolutely right.’
The following morning, Keith had woken squashed tightly between Kolivan and Kosmo, and had only grumbled about his aching thighs a little bit as they got ready for the day. The others came to have breakfast with them - Regris wearing the alligator onesie for the third day running and Keith with his mask activated up to his chin to hide all the hickies - and see them off, and Keith kissed each of them goodbye.
Now, though, he was on the ship that had brought him here, with Kolivan, Kosmo and Krolia, ready to visit Lance.
‘And everyone there knows that Shiro can’t know I’m here?’ he said.
‘As far as anyone on Earth is concerned, you were never here,’ said Krolia. ‘Don’t worry, dear, it’s fine. Looking forward to seeing your friend again?’
Keith nodded. ‘Yeah… yeah, I am.’
‘Please sit down, everyone,’ said Kolivan. ‘Keith, can you make that wolf sit down for take-off? Oh. He’s sitting already. Stand by.’
As the craft took off, Keith wondered how Lance would be now, and whether he’d be pleased to see him.
It turned out the answer was pretty bad, and not very. In fact, Lance looked as though he hadn't slept well in weeks, and was having trouble mustering up the energy for the indignation in the glare he was levelling at Keith. Romelle just looked worried, but she was trying to smile. She didn't even look angry that Keith had left without saying goodbye, Keith realised with a pang of guilt. He had actually missed Romelle.
‘What the hell are you doing here?’ asked Lance.
‘I’m supposed to be here,’ replied Keith. ‘You knew I was coming.’
‘I didn't know you were going. Mister Impulsive has to just get up and fuck off without telling anyone? Did you think that was funny?’
‘Hey, no, of course not, I-’
Kolivan's hand on Keith's arm silenced him immediately. ‘Red Paladin, I apologise, I am partially responsible for Keith's sudden departure. If you are to blame anyone, blame me.’
‘See!’ said Romelle to Lance. ‘I told you he wouldn't just go without a good reason.’
‘And you can talk about those reasons after we have discussed our primary reason for coming here.’
Lance sagged and said nothing, so Romelle, bless her, said brightly, ‘Aren't you building a teleduv? And Lance can power it!’
Lance sighed heavily. ‘You're all deluded,’ he said. ‘I can't power a teleduv. The Blue Lion probably made a mistake choosing me in the first place.’ Then he shoved his hands in his pockets and stormed out of the room.
‘Oh, no, not again,’ said Romelle. ‘Hold on, I'll get him back.’
‘No, I'll do it,’ said Keith. ‘It's me he wants to punch.’ Then he jogged out after Lance before anyone could stop him.
He found him heading out of the house towards the fields - presumably to sit with Kaltenecker and clear his head, and as someone who frequently thought out his troubles with his head buried in Kosmo’s mane, Keith didn't blame him. He called Lance's name and Lance turned on his heel - Keith wasn't entirely surprised to see his cheeks shining with tears.
‘What? What do you want? I thought you were my friend, Keith, but you keep fucking off. Why don’t you leave me alone when I want you to?’
Keith kept approaching until he was within reach, and said, ‘If you think hitting me will make you feel better then do it, give it your best shot. I won't stop you. You can have this one for free. I probably deserve it.’
He was half expecting Lance to refuse, instead he immediately got a right hook that made him see stars and sent him staggering. He righted himself, shaking his head to clear it, and poked gingerly at his left eyelid, which was already beginning to swell shut.
‘Damn. Not bad,’ he said. ‘Did that help?’
‘Little bit,’ said Lance grudgingly, shaking the life back into his knuckles. ‘You’re still a dick.’
‘So what's new. Look, can we talk?’
Silence for a moment, then Lance sighed. ‘Follow me.’
Keith followed him into what was clearly a very well-used kitchen and pulled an ice pack out of the freezer, handing it to Keith and waving the other hand at the table. ‘Sit down.’ He produced a pitcher of juice and a couple of glasses and sat down opposite Keith. ‘It's orange juice, we make it here on the farm, drink it or don't.’
‘Lance, you bet your ass I am absolutely going to try your farm's orange juice. Do you realise I've never had real fresh oranges before?’ It tasted, as expected, like morning sunshine, and Keith was sure to tell Lance that, but from his face he clearly didn't believe it, and further, didn't care.
‘Sure, right, we'll send some to the Marmora base on the regular. I'm still fucking mad at you.’
Keith sighed and sagged a little in his chair. ‘I know. I'm sorry. You might understand if you knew why I left, or you might try and stab me in the throat, I don't know.’
‘If you make one more joke involving one of us being dead I'll black your other eye and not give you any ice.’
‘...Right. Sorry.’
‘This had better be a damn good excuse.’
‘It’s probably a really bad one, but here goes.’ Keith took a deep breath and another sip of the wonderful juice, and began. ‘First of all, did you know I was in love with Shiro.’
Lance snorted and rolled his eyes. ‘Well, duh. The only person obtuse enough not to see that was Shiro himself, we’d have tried to do something to get you two together except you might have cut our throats while we slept.’
Keith hesitated. ‘I… probably would have, at that. Just goes to show, I don’t know what’s best for me, either, huh?’
‘You were really well suited. You were matched disasters. So it was all about Shiro marrying some other schmuck? Seriously?’
‘Not… entirely. Voltron was gone so I wasn’t Black Paladin anymore, Shiro was married and I spent my entire adult life looking up to him and chasing after him. It was more than just being in love, but he’s grounded now and happy, there’s nowhere to chase him now. So… what now? And there I was at the reception, watching them be disgustingly domestic and happy, and Kolivan came up to me and offered to take me away with the Blades.’
‘But you could have said goodbye!’ said Lance, hurt standing out like a beacon in every line of his face.
‘I… thought it was best if it didn’t get back to Shiro where I’d gone or why. I wanted to clear my head and I just wanted to be alone for a while, I definitely didn’t want Shiro showing up at the base trying to bring me back. Which you know he’d do if he thought he’d upset me at all. I didn’t wanna be connected to Voltron for a little bit - nothing personal.’ Keith put out a hand. ‘There’s just…’
‘A lot to forget,’ murmured Lance. ‘Yeah, I know. I was there, remember? You know I kind of expected you to be wearing that red jacket over your Blade uniform. I guess it doesn’t fit with those shoulderpads.’
‘Oh, yeah…’ Keith shifted, turning to holding the icepack up with the other hand. ‘No, I just mostly stopped wearing red. Especially that jacket. All the clothes I had in the time you really knew me were, well, Red Paladin clothes and I’m not that anymore. I’m not even the Black Paladin. I’m a Marmora Commandant instead.’
Lance looked like he was going to say something, but shut his mouth again, and Keith didn’t attempt to make it better. It was what it was, and anything he could say would only make it worse. Instead he said, ‘I really think you could work this teleduv. Allura gave you those marks for a reason.’
‘Yeah, it was so every time I look in the mirror I remember her,’ said Lance sullenly. ‘I couldn’t do anything she could.’
‘Give me one good reason why not. She wanted to carry on her father’s legacy. Why couldn’t she pass it on to you?’
‘I’m not amazing like her.’
‘I said a good reason, and that’s not even true.’ Keith put down the icepack, leaned across the table and gave Lance a little shake. ‘Both of you flew the Blue Lion, you could both do that. In fact she looked up to you as she was learning to do that. Do you think, if she could hear you now - actually, what do you know, she might, who knows what actually happened to her? - if she can hear you now, what would she think if she knew you were giving up without even trying? Do you think she’d like that?’
Lance stared up at Keith. Then he shoved him in the chest, and Keith sat down. ‘Don’t you dare put words in Allura’s mouth,’ he hissed.
‘I’m not,’ said Keith. ‘I’m asking you a question. You knew her better than I did, I’m asking you what you think she’d say. She gave you some of her life force and brought you back to life, we saw her restore a planet-creature to health, she gave everything to save the universe. Do you think she’d want you to give up without even trying?’
Lance glared, then looked down. ‘No. I’ll give it my best shot, for Allura’s sake. But I can’t guarantee anything.’
‘Your best shot is all any of us would want of you.’ Keith finished his juice. ‘I’ll go back first so I can tell mom and Kolivan not to kill you for giving me this black eye.’
‘OK. Look, I’m gonna go outside for a bit.’
‘Fine by me. Give Kaltenecker a pat for me.’
Lance nodded, and Keith found his way back to the rest of the Marmora delegation, and Romelle.
Persuading Krolia and Kolivan not to be angry about the black eye took a bit of doing, and some strenuous insisting that he’d literally asked for it, but by the time Lance joined them again, all was calm. They stayed on New Altea until the next day, and later in the evening - changed into jeans, t-shirt and jacket, with a scarf flipped around his neck against the chill night air - Keith and Romelle took Kosmo out for a run.
‘What did you say to him to make him do that to you?’ asked Romelle, throwing a stick for Kosmo. Kosmo watched it go, but failed to go after it.
‘I told you, I said “hit me”.’
‘Why, though? That looks like it hurts!’
Keith shrugged. ‘I’ve had worse. And he was mad at me, he needed to let some of it out. It got him talking. Romelle, is he always that bad? He’s given up .’
Romelle sighed, trudging along for a few steps with her hands in her pockets. ‘Some days he’s worse,’ she said eventually.
‘But I’ve not even been gone a movement!’
The look Romelle gave him was more serious and more mature than any Keith had ever seen from her, and made him wonder exactly how much you could know a person in three years. ‘He’s been like this since before the wedding, Keith. Ever since Allura died. Sometimes the only thing that gets him out of bed in the mornings is the fact that the animals need to be tended to, sometimes not even that, and I have to do it on my own. When you left he and Shiro had this huge argument that they thought I didn’t hear, about whose fault it was that you left.’
‘Blaming each other?’ Keith’s forehead creased. ‘No, wait, that’s not right. They’d be blaming themselves.’
‘Yes! And Shiro keeps calling at least once a day in case you turn up here, between him and me we’ve convinced Lance it wasn’t his fault you left, but Shiro still thinks he did something or said something…’ Romelle stopped under a spreading fruit tree. ‘Now you have showed up, you need to call him.’ Then she turned and started to climb the tree.
‘Romelle, I can’t call Shiro, I can’t face him,’ began Keith.
‘Coward,’ said Romelle. ‘Catch.’ She dropped an irregular blue-green fruit covered in soft fuzz into Keith’s hands, then climbed down again, cramming her own fruit into her mouth with one hand and hanging onto the branch with the other.
‘If I can see him then I know exactly how he’ll look. He’ll be hurt that I abandoned him after I promised I wouldn’t, and I don’t know what to say to that.’ Keith bit into the fruit, expecting it to be soft like a peach and surprised when it was firm like a slightly underripe pear. ‘Hey Romelle, what’s this?’
‘Gashan t’her,’ said Romelle absently, wiping juice off her chin with her sleeve. ‘It makes great juice. Look, if you can’t face him then record a message and stop him fretting. Let him know you’re alive and still like him.’
Oh, god, how could Keith not still like Shiro? He nodded. ‘Yeah, OK, I’ll do that. Thanks, Romelle. It’s a good idea.’
Romelle smiled. ‘I know. I have great ideas!’
‘And you have to try the teleduv too.’
There was a short silence while Romelle finished the gashan t’her and threw the core into the grass. ‘Are you sure? I’ve never shown any kind of alchemical powers before.’
Keith smiled, taking his time with the fruit. ‘Have you tried?’
‘Well… not really?’
‘Then you need to give it a shot. For Allura’s memory.’
Romelle stood up, wiping her hands on her pants, and sighed. ‘Alright, but don’t be disappointed in me if I fail. Let’s get back to the house.’
‘Hi Shiro - fuck, I can’t do this.’
Meditate, deep breaths, calm mind, try again.
‘Hi Shiro - first of all don’t worry about the black eye, I’m fine, Lance was understandably mad at me for running off without saying goodbye so I told him to let it out some. All that sparring training you put us through really paid off! So, uh, yeah, about that. I really am sorry I didn’t say goodbye. I was afraid you’d try and stop me.’
Delete ‘I was afraid you’d try and stop me.’ Continue.
'I needed some distance to clear my head, I promise I’ll explain everything as soon as I’m ready. I’m safe with the Blades, I’m well and happy. Please don’t visit me or try to contact me yet. I wish it could have been different between us.’
Delete ‘I wish it could have been different between us.’ Continue.
‘I wish you and Curtis the best.’
Pause, stop crying, go and wash face, meditate, deep breaths, continue.
‘I’m glad it was someone like him if it couldn’t be me. Don’t worry about me, Keith.’
End message, send message.
That night, Keith was glad of Kolivan’s huge, warm embrace as he cried himself to sleep.
Notes:
Hey, you get to know some of the history of Keith's job in this chapter! Also the Blade of Marmora were never sweetness and light, probably as a Galra rebel organization they have been downright brutal at times. War's like that. Incidentally Antok is eighty-seven Earth years old but in terms of actual aging he's about 36. Kolivan is 59 Earth years but Antok's a hybrid and Kolivan isn't so how old Kolivan is is anyone's guess. He looks to be in his late 40s but he might have looked that way since puberty. Alien aging, who knows?
I must remind everyone once more that I did not actually *see* season 8 and am mostly going from what I picked up off Tumblr and Twitter, so if anything doesn't fit with canon, who cares, this is an ABO poly fic and s8 was universally agreed to be a shitpit anyway.
I know this is getting more and more complex but it's not going to just devolve into chaos, I promise, anything that's actually superfluous is getting trimmed and may eventually get written as a short for a series - Keith's first night with Regris, for example, for those of you who were looking forward to that. THERE IS A PLAN.
Also thankyou so much to Hegglet for betaing this chapter - I don't often use betas but when I do they need to be fast and thorough and Heg did what I needed her to do within 24 hours so I could keep the words coming. Praise Hegglet!
Chapter 6: Dreams Slip Through Your Fingers
Summary:
In which Regris's experiments with casual clothing don't go as planned, the new recruits arrive and Keith's first pregnancy brings more sadness than joy.
Notes:
Not to beat arround the bush, there's a miscarriage in this one, and Keith doesn't deal well. If this is a trigger for anyone, this is your warning right here.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
By the time Kolivan’s shuttle was back from New Altea, Antok was also returned from his recruitment mission, and apparently it had gone well. There had been hundreds of hopefuls and Antok, Ezor and Zethrid had whittled them down to twenty, and now the prospective new Blades, in their cadet uniforms, were lined up on one side of the main hall as Kolivan and the rest of the Marmora looked them over.
Kolivan glanced down the line, then back to the datapad in his hand. ‘So… four medics - Antok, it says here psychologists, we are not studying brains here.’
‘No, Leader, that means we have three trauma counsellors, two general therapists and one mental health specialist. And four medics.’
‘Oh. Very well. And then five engineers, two computer specialists, and three fighters. If all pass their Trial, this will more than triple our membership, well done.’
‘Thankyou, Leader.’
Kolivan handed the datapad back to Antok and addressed the new recruits. ‘Welcome to the New Daibazaal base. Lieutenant Antok you have already met, also Sergeants Zethrid and Ezor.’ At this point Ezor and Zethrid both looked round sharply - apparently the promotion hadn’t been discussed. ‘I am Leader Kolivan, these are Lieutenant Krolia, CMO Ulaz, Major Thace, and Sergeant-Major Regris. And you may also recognise Commandant Keith Kogane, also Black Paladin of Voltron.’
‘Commandant?’ blurted one of the new recruits, and cringed in the face of the glare he got. ‘I'm sorry, Leader, I just didn't think that was a term the Marmora used, I'm not sure what it means here-’
‘It's fine,’ said Keith. ‘Is anyone here familiar with the term Aghammara Marmora?’
That got him mostly looks of confusion, but a few wide eyes and, to his surprise, a couple of awed looks and even a bow from one of the new medics.
‘Commandant, I'm delighted the Marmora is raising its own family again. I couldn't think of anyone more suited to the job.’
It was a compliment, it was, and a huge one, but Keith still had to fight to keep his face under control. ‘I, uh, thankyou, sorry, I'm terrible with names, Xaniel?’
‘That's right, sir! From Ynci. If I can do anything to help you at any point you have only to ask. I'd be honored.’
Keith was about to refuse, to say he had Ulaz for that, but suddenly he changed his mind. ‘Actually, yes, there is something. I need you to explain to all our new recruits what it is I actually do, and that my Circle is Kolivan, Thace, Ulaz, Antok and Regris, and not just anyone. You can do that, yes?’
‘Absolutely, Sir!’ Xaniel saluted. ‘I won't let you down!’
‘Good. Thankyou.’ Keith flashed Kolivan a brief smile, and returned to attention.
‘Trials will be taking place over the following two movements,’ said Kolivan. ‘Ezor, Zethrid, Regris, escort the new recruits to their quarters. Dismissed.’
Everyone filed out, and Keith headed straight to his rooms. There was something he wanted very much to do, but he was joined almost instantly by Kolivan and then Ulaz, and then Krolia, Antok and finally Regris. Everyone was in various styles of casual clothes, but the really distracting one was Regris.
‘What,’ said Keith, ‘are you wearing?’
He had been expecting his circle to show up in clothes he’d never seen the like of before - it was a big universe - but Regris had clearly dressed from an Earth wardrobe. A really weird Earth wardrobe. He looked down at himself, at the eyebleeding neon orange funfur jacket that looked like he’d killed a Muppet and was wearing its pelt; at the green crop top that said, in silver hologram letters, ‘SEDUCTION MY IS NEW STRATEGY’ and oh god, those were Crocs. Bright blue glittery ones, with knee-high striped socks.
‘What? I didn't know what to wear and Krolia said the croc onesie needed to be washed so I looked at Earth internet to see what you wear. It's comfortable!’
Keith didn't have the heart to tell him.
‘You brought this on yourself,’ murmured Krolia into his ear.
‘Yeah,’ said Keith hopelessly. ‘I know.’
‘What?’ said Regris indignantly. ‘What’s funny? I look stupid, don’t I? Fine, Keith, come here, you think I look stupid, you have to tell me what’s acceptable.’ And he grabbed Keith by the wrist and marched him out to the bedroom, tail lashing angrily.
Keith, momentarily taken off guard, staggered for a second but ran out after him. ‘Regris! Hey, Regris, hold on, no, I don’t think you look stupid, look at me, I- come on, now, are you mad at me?’ As soon as Regris stopped, Keith put his hands on his shoulders, drew him down and scented him. ‘Calm down now, I’m sorry, you just… surprised me. I’m not gonna stop anyone wearing anything they want, as long as it’s not a uniform. It’s fine, shh.’
‘But I’m obviously wearing it wrong,’ said Regris sullenly, draped over Keith’s smaller frame and with his face buried in his hair.
‘What? No. Just… not usual for Earth. Do you know what this says?’ Keith tapped Regris’s chest.
Regris shook his head. ‘No. I just kind of assumed it said something cool.’
‘Yeah, that’s pretty common, you get a lot of people walking around in places like Japan and China and Russia saying stuff like FUCK BUTTER and VALUE DOOR INNOCENSE and crap like that, just because they have a different writing system and no idea what it says. This one says SEDUCTION MY IS NEW STRATEGY. Which is, well, it makes sense. Mostly. But seduction’s always been your strategy, if I’m not mistaken.’
Regris grinned and combed his fingers through Keith’s hair. ‘Well, that’s true. What about the rest, is that OK?’
‘Well, the jacket is kind of painfully bright but I won’t stop you wearing it. As for the shoes - if you like them then go ahead, I’m just going to say that they’re considered very ugly on Earth, especially with socks. But they’re Crocs, they’re not meant to be pretty. They’re the kind of shoe you wear for utility and nothing else.’ Keith looked down. Regris was wearing what appeared to be some kind of three-legged culottes that encompassed his tail as well, and they were in pink city camo. Keith grimaced. ‘Damn, you do sure like to wear a lot of colours all at once, huh?’
‘Is that… bad? Or abnormal?’
‘Are you trying to dress like a human male, here? Because human men mostly dress boring as hell, I mean look at me, I wear mostly black.’
Regris thought about it, and took off the jacket. ‘I want you to take me seriously. Can I at least get a new jacket that won’t hurt your eyes. And some shoes that aren’t ugly.’
Keith looked at Regris, surprised. ‘Regris - I do take you seriously. You’re my best friend here, in fact…’ He swallowed around the sudden lump in his throat. ‘In fact now Shiro’s gone I think you might be my best friend, period. You don’t have to dress right for that.’
Regris leaned down and kissed him, smiling now, and said, ‘That means a lot. But also you know I didn’t own non-uniform clothes till you arrived, so come on and teach me about this casual dressing thing, since you made the damn rule.’
Keith laughed. ‘Right. Let’s see what we can do.’
Eventually they re-emerged into the dining room, Regris wearing a grey and teal bomber jacket with orange trim, much longer dark blue pants and a pair of what to the untrained eye appeared to be bright yellow hi-tops.
‘Not bad,’ said Krolia approvingly. ‘What did you do with the stop sign jacket?’
‘Recycled it,’ said Regris airily. ‘Keith said it hurt his eyes.’
‘That’s not to say you couldn’t have kept it!’ said Keith. ‘Oh, well, if you want it again you can remake it.’
Thace had cooked for the circle to celebrate two successful missions and Regris's unexpected promotion - the two new sergeants had been left in charge of the new recruits for the rest of the evening. Dinner turned out to be some sort of orange mash rolled up in broad purplish leaves and served with a drop-shaped green grain mixed with a creamy sauce. Kolivan and Krolia doused it in something dark red out of a bottle, and when Keith asked what it was, Krolia handed it over but just said, ‘It's an acquired taste.’
Keith put a drop on his fingertip, tasted it and grimaced. he'd expected hot, bitter, salty perhaps, not this overwhelmingly, cloyingly sweet. ‘Oh, yech, excuse me if I don't acquire that,’ he said, emptying his water glass and filling it again. ‘What's the other one?’
The shaker full of grey powder, which everyone but Krolia was adding to their food, was pushed in his direction.
‘This is g’arakeh,’ said Krolia. ‘It's about as common in the galra empire as, well, pepper on Earth.’
Keith tasted it, fully expecting it to taste like pepper. It didn't, though, it tasted bright and sharp, and he added a liberal helping to his food and dug in.
‘OK, first of all this is delicious, as always,’ said Keith, watching the satisfied delight bloom across Thace's face. ‘Second, I have an announcement to make!’ He stuffed a leaf roll thing into his mouth and waited until he had everyone's undivided attention. Pause for drama, smile at Kolivan. ‘I'm pregnant.’
The table instantly went into uproar and Keith was bombarded by congratulations and questions from all sides. That's wonderful! Whose is it? For how long? Congratulations, that’s amazing! How do you feel?
Keith waited for things to calm down before laughing and shushing them all. ‘Alright, alright, chill. It's Kolivan's, I checked the morning we left for Lance's place but I wanted to keep it as a surprise.’
‘It certainly is a surprise,’ said Kolivan, getting up to come around the table and kiss him. ‘I’m so proud.’
Keith beamed, then looked over at Ulaz. ‘As for you, I feel… OK, yeah. Now I do, anyway.’
Kolivan, standing beside Keith with one of Keith's arms around his waist, went very still, and Ulaz's smile froze. ‘Now you do?’
Keith shrugged. ‘I was a bit sick on New Altea, it might've been an allergy to some of those fruits they're growing. Shame, they tasted good.’
‘Keith,’ said Ulaz carefully, ‘I think you should test again.’
Keith looked at Ulaz, then Kolivan, then Krolia, suddenly terrified, and to the anxious faces of the rest of his circle. None of them could help him, he realised. He stood up on shaking legs, and had to make himself let Kolivan support him.
‘Ulaz, come with me,’ he said. ‘Kolivan, you stay here. Mom, you too. Everyone else please go, I'll let you know when there's more news.’
There was a brief hesitation, then Antok nodded and left. Thace gestured towards the dirty plates and pans and Krolia said, ‘Don't worry, Thace, I'll take care of that.’
‘Alright,’ said Thace. ‘Keith, everything will be fine, call me if you need anything.’ Then he stood up and left.
Regris smiled. ‘Yeah, stop acting like the worst already happened. You're just checking.’
Keith nodded. ‘Yeah. Thanks. Night, Regris.’
When Regris had gone, he allowed Ulaz to lead him into the bathroom and up onto the scanner tile. He placed a shaking hand on the wall and said, ‘Initiate scan omega 003.’
The blue light washed over him, and the words appeared on the wall: Commandant Keith Kogane, Human, Origin Earth, 22 Decaphoebs, weight 55.7 glaishicks, clean health scan, next heat estimated within 3 movements, not pregnant.
He read it again. It still read, Not pregnant.
‘Ulaz. Ulaz, come and read this,’ he whispered.
Ulaz read it over his shoulder and all Keith's disbelief crumpled into awful acceptance when he spoke. ‘Oh no.’
Keith howled, would have dropped to his knees if Ulaz hadn't caught him and drawn him into a gentle embrace. ‘Oh, Keith. Come here.’
‘It’s my fault, though!’ said Keith. ‘I knew I was, I went on the mission anyway, the space travel must have done it, what am I gonna tell Kolivan?’
‘Shush. That’s the most ridiculous nonsense I ever heard. My omega parent went into space while pregnant with me. So did Kolivan’s and Antok’s and Thace’s and Regris’s, although he’s a bit of a special case. It’s normal for galra.’ Ulaz scented Keith, rubbing his back in circles, until he calmed down enough to listen a little.
‘So what did it?’ sobbed Keith. ‘What did I do wrong?’
‘You did nothing wrong,’ replied Ulaz. ‘You were what, two, three days gone at most? Your body just… reabsorbed it. It happens all the time, especially this early on. Medically speaking it’s not even a fetus at this stage, just a gamete. It doesn’t even have a heartbeat. Keith, I know you’re excited.’
‘I don’t know why,’ said Keith. ‘It doesn’t make sense. I wanted to be a pilot and then I wanted to find out what really happened to Shiro and then I wanted to find out who I was, then Shiro again… I want, I want… I want a family.’
‘I know.’ Ulaz kissed Keith on the temple and said, ‘It’ll happen. Your heat is soon, it’s almost certain to happen then. Can I get you anything?’
Keith shook his head. ‘I have to tell Mom and Kolivan, don't I. I can't face Kolivan yet.’
‘I'll tell him. He'll understand. Come on, put on your comforting hippo outfit and I will bring you a mug of olfracta and anything else you need.’
Keith nodded. ‘That's a good idea.’
Keith changed in the bedroom, hearing the hushed voices outside and the sound of the door. When he was sure Krolia and Kolivan were both gone he padded out to the living room. ‘Ulaz?’
‘Yes?’
‘I think I need a quilt for the couch. And then…’
Ulaz was already retrieving a quilt and bringing it to the living room. ‘And?’
‘And then I think I just wanna be on my own for a while. Thanks, though.’
Ulaz said nothing for a second, then he nodded. ‘Call me if you need anything,’ he said, and left Keith alone with Kosmo.
Keith heard the doorbell chime and ignored it, turning his face further into Kosmo’s fur. Sometimes if he burrowed in deep enough he thought maybe he would fall through and appear alone, in the vacuum of space, or perhaps back on the space whale. For a moment, he thought that would be the only thing he wanted right now, but then remembered all the visions and decided against it. The visions had been cruel as far as his future went - there had been the fight between himself and Shiro, and nothing beyond that.
The ones that featured the Blade of Marmora had come in short flashes, as likely to be from an alternate universe as anything else - little visions in which he was actually giving birth, or breastfeeding, and watching children who looked undeniably like himself argue and play and eat and grow - what sort of universe was that? He’d seen this, too, but hadn’t realised what it was - just the same room he’d seen with some of the visions with the children, and himself, curled up against Kosmo, too unhappy to even cry.
The doorbell chimed again, then the message beep on his tablet. He sighed and picked it up, feeling a little bad that he didn’t want to talk to Kolivan yet. But it was Krolia, so he let her in.
She didn't say anything at first, just held him tight and scented him and smoothed his hair while he sobbed noiselessly into her shoulder. It was a relief to finally be able to cry, but it was over before he was ready, leaving him with a chunk of grief stuck in his chest where he could dislodge it.
‘I know it hurts,’ murmured Krolia. ‘None of them can possibly know how much it hurts. They're all such good alphas and they try so hard but it's an omega thing.’
Keith sniffed hard. ‘...You… You lost a kid?’
Krolia nodded. ‘More than once. And I won't lie, I have had pregnancy held over my head as a weapon - losing that one was a relief but it hurt too because I wished it could have been happier.’
There was silence for a moment. Then Keith said, ‘Was I your only one?’
‘There's a faint possibility you have an older sister. But her alpha mother took her with her when she joined the empire’s mission to colonise Hniki, so I never heard from either of them again. That's what triggered my impulse to join the Blades.’
‘What's her name?’
‘Yelka. It may have been changed by now, I don't know.’
‘Hm.’ Keith sat there, rubbing the end of his mother's pigtail between his fingertips for a second. ‘Is Kolivan OK?’
‘He’s with Antok.’
‘Oh.’ That hadn't been what he'd asked, but it would do, for now.
‘Here is what I suggest,’ said Krolia, dropping a kiss on the top of Keith's head. ‘I will get you some mac ‘n’ cheese, and some hot chocolate with cream and sprinkles, or whatever flavour of ice cream you'd prefer, or olfracta, or anything you want. And then you can watch distracting cartoons or, I know, those baffling movies that Tex liked.’
‘We have those?!’
‘We're in contact with Earth now, of course we do.’
Keith blinked for a moment, taking this in, then something else occurred to him. ‘Mom, you did know my dad's name wasn't actually Tex, right? It was-’
‘Samson Oliver Kogane, I know, dear. He liked Tex better. Now what would you like to eat?’
The rest of the day passed in a blur of nostalgic foods and even more nostalgic movies - The Good, The Bad And The Ugly; Ghostbusters; The Mummy, Bill And Ted's Excellent Adventure. By the time Bill and Ted were triumphantly playing God Gave Rock And Roll To You, Keith was fast asleep. Krolia carried him to bed and tucked him in. Kosmo immediately appeared on the bed, ears pricked dutifully, and Krolia smiled at him and rubbed his head, then went off to sleep in the spare room, just in case.
Keith slept through the night, arms tightly clamped around Kosmo's long-suffering neck, but he woke early, a specter of guilt and failure chasing him out of a sickening dream he couldn't quite piece together. He'd lost something important and it had meant the loss of his purpose.
All at once it came back to him, and as it did Kosmo teleported him into the bathroom just in time to throw up. Vomit turned to dry-heaves just as cool hands pressed against his temples and there was warm breath against the back of his ear, calming him all through. He relaxed, and accepted the cup of water he was handed.
‘Morning, Mom.’
‘Hello, Dear. Bad dreams?’
‘Not so I can remember. Just general bad feelings.’
Krolia nodded. ‘Come and have something to eat, it’s not good for you to go around with an empty stomach after throwing up so hard. What are you going to do today?’
Keith followed her through to the kitchen and shrugged miserably, although Krolia was busy at the food printer and had her back to him by now. ‘Dunno. I was going to stay here for a while longer. I still don’t wanna face Kolivan.’
‘Well, much as it’s nice to hide in a hole when we’re miserable, dwelling on it by yourself will only make it all seem worse. You need to let your alphas help you, even if they don’t fully understand.’
‘But Kolivan-’
‘Might be the one who understands it best right now.’ Krolia placed a plate full of waffles with maple syrup and a mug of olfracta in front of Keith, and sat down opposite him with her own breakfast. ‘But I’m not actually saying you have to speak to him yet. Just eat, shower, get dressed and leave your rooms. Go and see how all these new recruits are doing, maybe.’
Keith hesitated, his mouth full. That actually sounded like a pretty decent distraction. Still… ‘I’m not watching them go through their trials.’
‘Nobody’s asking you to,’ replied Krolia. ‘In fact, I believe at least one of them has passed already.’
‘Oh?’ Keith perked up. ‘Xaniel?’
‘No, they’re due to trial in three days. You like them?’
‘Seemed like they had… potential, anyway. Who was it who’s passed?’
‘Oh, one of the trauma therapists. She’s from Guor, did you see her, with the four legs and the big paws? Her name’s… quite long, actually, but she said it was alright to call her Horns-Never-Lowered.’
Keith raised his eyebrows. ‘That’s still pretty long.’
‘You should have heard Kolivan saying the real thing in Oq’daspec’tanic. Maybe you should go and talk to her?’
Keith thought about it. ‘Maybe. But I will get dressed properly and get out of here. I promise.’
Krolia leaned over and kissed him on the temple. ‘That’s my brave boy.’
He didn't feel brave, and he didn't want to see Kolivan, or anyone, but eventually he got out his uniform - and completely failed to put it on, because of what it meant. Instead he called Kolivan. Krolia’s ears pricked up at the sound of the name.
‘Do you need me to stay?’ she said.
‘No. Thanks, though.’ Keith hugged her tightly, scented her and then she left, just as Kolivan was arriving - out of breath and trying to look as though he hadn't run all the way there. Keith couldn't help but smile a little.
‘Keith! I- are you alright?’ Kolivan reached out to him, then hesitated.
Keith cursed inwardly and stepped into the forgiving circle of his alpha’s arms. ‘I'm… so fucking sorry, Kol. I failed.’
‘What? No.’ Kolivan rubbed his back, scented the back of his neck and it would have been blissful if not for the guilt. ‘How could you possibly have failed? You didn't fail.’
‘I'm supposed to be the Commandant, the Aghammara Marmora, the omega. And yet not one successful pregnancy yet. The nearest thing I've had miscarried - you let me think I'd have some kind of purpose and what did I do? I flushed out your kit. What if I can't do this?’
Keith felt Kolivan tense against him and realised he could have put that more elegantly, but then Kolivan only picked him up and carried him to bed. Once there, he changed out of his uniform into plain, soft black pants and got in beside him, hugging him tightly against his chest.
‘You borrow trouble, Keith. I have absolute faith in you, so do the others. Nearly all galra conceptions occur during heat; the fact that you conceived at all outside of heat proves that you're more fertile than average. You have not failed your mission.’
‘But you- ’
Kolivan silenced him with a kiss on the forehead. ‘You have not failed me, either. Someday I am sure our child will be born, and be both strong and beautiful, although I hope not as prone to jumping to wild conclusions as its omega parent.’
Keith snorted and snuggled into the space under Kolivan's chin that he was starting to think of as his spot. ‘If it's as adorable as its alpha parent it can't lose.’
‘Adorable?’ Kolivan's forehead creased.
‘Ask Antok, he'll totally back me up.’
Keith had fallen asleep before Kolivan had quite worked out what to say.
The next day, a message arrived from New Altea, confirming that Shiro had received Keith's message and sent a reply. Keith deleted it without reading it.
‘Don't you want to know what it says?’ said Regris.
‘I know what it says,’ said Keith.
Ulaz looked at him for a long moment, then said, ‘Fine. But I believe you should speak to Horns-Never-Lowered at some point. She really is very good.’
‘I’ll think about it,’ lied Keith. ‘Can we talk about something else? Do we have any decent fliers?’
Antok and Regris immediately started discussing the merits and failings of the new recruits, but from the way Ulaz was looking at him, Keith didn't think the topic was as forgotten as he'd hoped.
Notes:
I am aware that some of the ways I dealt with the issues here may have been seen to be problematic by some people - I'm just going to say that the views held by the characters aren't necessarily the views held by the author and leave it there. I'm not here to give a class in unproblematic thought, I'm here to tell a story.
On another note, the Blades' ranks are *roughly* based on a combination of UK/USA military ranks, both army and navy, mostly using whichever one I most liked the sound of out of the Wikipedia list. It's a translation from the Galran. Don't worry about it.
I am also aware that this is not how pregnancy works and that Keith should have noticed. Well, shh, it's how galra work and they lose pregnancies early on without noticing all the time. Omega galra don't have periods, they have heats.
Chapter 7: The Man Behind The Mask
Summary:
In which Antok removes his mask.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
After that, things started to fall into a routine for Keith; he started to get used to the new recruits - fourteen of the twenty passed, and Keith attended exactly none of their trials, but made sure to congratulate them all individually afterwards. He was privately smug that Xaniel had made it - it confirmed that he was right, and that always felt good. But that didn't mean he was going to go easy on them when he started their piloting classes.
It came as a slight surprise that the next significant setback turned out to be Antok. Antok was always quietly unexpected, of course - going from the menacing presence at Kolivan's right hand to the shy gentle giant, quietly flirting with Kolivan and waiting for permission to do the same with Keith. He had responded to the no-uniforms order by softening his outline, all fluffy sweaters and soft pants and thick socks, as deliberate a camouflage as any infiltration, and Keith had responded to that by draping himself over him at every opportunity, like he was a living beanbag. It had surprised Antok at first, and then he’d seemed flattered and accepted it happily.
Except he still never took off his mask and hood. It hardly bothered Keith at all right up until they were in bed and the mask still wasn't coming off.
Keith placed both hands on the massive, scarred chest in front of him and took a deep breath, trying not to think of the fears of getting chained down to get fucked by an endless rotation of faceless Blades in masks just like this one. Antok noticed immediately, took his hands off Keith's hips and placed them firmly on the bed, leaning back so he was looming as little as possible.
‘Keith? Are you alright?’
‘I’m sorry,’ said Keith hoarsely. ‘I can't. Not with the mask.’
There was silence, in which Keith could feel Antok’s eyes, or maybe those blue lights - how many eyes did he really have, anyway? - burning into him. ‘I see,’ he said eventually, and Keith was kicking himself for the tone of his voice but it was done now. ‘Kolivan mentioned you may feel something like this.’
‘Antok, I'm really sorry.’
Antok just nodded. ‘And I am sorry that I cannot accommodate you.’
Keith's brow creased and he reached out for Antok's hand. ‘Hey. If you think you're ugly or something, it can't be that bad. I promise there's no way you're hideous enough that you can't show me.’
Antok snorted, but he took Keith's hand. ‘Sometimes you show your youth so starkly, little Blade. If it were only so simple as cosmetic worries. No, this scar,’ he indicated the wide scar taking up most of the right side of his chest and neck, ‘covers much of my face and in the getting of it my sight and breathing were badly damaged. I need the mask to compensate.’
‘Oh.’ Keith reached out to touch the edges of the scar. ‘I'm. I'm sorry.’
Antok shied back. ‘You of all people should know I do not want pity.’
‘Alright, fine,’ said Keith, settling his hand on Antok's shoulder. ‘Will you tell me how it happened?’
‘It was in my early childhood, it's a tiny thing in all the galran crimes I have experienced.’
‘Don't tell me if you don't want to,’ said Keith, then winced at how petulant that must have sounded. ‘I mean - you really don’t have to tell me. It’s fine.’
‘I merely do not see how it can matter now, after all this time. But if you really wish to know I will tell you.’ He pulled his sweater, a soft, creamy thing, oversized even for him, back on and lay back against the pillows. Keith watched him carefully, wondering if old wounds really had ceased to bleed and whether he was doing the right thing here? ‘I was born to a Blade of Marmora while she was on an exceptionally deep cover mission. My omega parent had been living as the governor of an important trade planet for fifteen years, and of course while there she went into heat several times, and one of those times resulted in my birth. Understand, while she was there she diverted many important galra attacks, or caused them to fall short, and had she succeeded she could have slowed that section of the empire by tens of decaphoebs. But when I was a small child she was discovered. Of course she was killed, but they made her watch them torture me first. They didn't waste the druids’ time on a mere child, the simply drenched me in acid and let her watch me scream for her, where she couldn't reach me. That was the last I ever saw her.’
Keith felt, in that moment, as if he could resurrect Zarkon just to kill him again, instead he threw himself into Antok’s arms. ‘Fuck. Those bastards.’
Antok just laid a hand on Keith’s hair and continued dispassionately, ‘By the time I was rescued it was too late for her and very nearly too late for me.’ He let out a huff of laughter, as jovial as an execution. ‘I’m told I was a very pretty child, too.’ Then he scented Keith and said, ‘But perhaps we can reconcile this some other way. In the meantime… I should go.’
‘Wait, no, Antok-’
‘I am no use to you,’ said Antok, standing up. ‘I will send Ulaz in my place.’
Keith knelt up on the bed and reached out to him. ‘No, Antok, c’mon, stay, we don’t have to fuck, what do you mean you’re no use to me?’
‘I need to go. Goodnight, Keith.’ Antok turned his back and left.
Keith slumped. ‘Shit.’
The first thing Keith did when he saw Kolivan come in after breakfast the next day was steer him into the guest room and say, ‘Kolivan, how’s Antok? He came to you last night, didn’t he?’
Kolivan raised his eyebrows. ‘He did, yes. He is well.’
‘OK, cool.’ Keith shifted his weight uncomfortably. ‘Right, this is going to sound weird.’
‘I’m listening.’
‘Did you tell him you care about him?’
A short, speculative silence, then, ‘I don’t see why that concerns you, Keith.’
‘It’s important, alright. Look, you might think I can’t see that you two don’t have total heart-eyes for each other but I can and I really think I fucked up last night and actually hurt him, so that means he went to you and it’s vital that he knows you care about him.’
Slowly, Kolivan mouthed heart-eyes, then his brows twitched up in a little oh-well gesture of dismissal as he decided to concentrate on the part of the sentence that had actually made sense. ‘As it happens I did, but what I wonder is why didn’t you?’
Suddenly, Keith’s shoes were incredibly fascinating. ‘Look, I just… I can’t just say that kind of thing, it’s… it’s complicated, I don’t know, I’m not good at this feels shit, Kol.’
‘And yet you clearly do care for Antok.’ There was no reply. ‘Keith, you can care for someone without being in love with them.’
Keith nodded. ‘Yeah, I know that.’ He considered a second, and said, ‘Then I guess what I meant is that you should tell him you love him. Cause you do, right?’
‘He knows,’ said Kolivan quietly.
‘You should still tell him.’
‘I will take that under advisement. Now we should join the others before we are missed.’
Keith nodded. ‘Yeah. Don’t wanna be late for classes, I just got ‘em properly terrified.’ He gave Kolivan an impish grin and Kolivan smiled back as they headed out to start their day.
A few days later, after Keith and Antok had finished thoroughly embarrassing the new recruits at their piloting classes, Keith noticed that two of them - a spindly probably-male with bat wings and some kind of android, although how that worked with the galra blood thing was a mystery - had stayed behind to talk to Antok. He watched the three of them talk, and then the android reached up and adjusted something just inside Antok's hood. Then the winged boy noticed Keith, then they all did, and the three of them crossed the room to join him.
‘Well hi,’ he said. ‘You all look pleased with yourselves, although I'm not sure how I can tell that since Gitun is the only one able to smile right now.’
Gitun flexed his wings a little and his extremely pointy smile became even more so. ‘Yes, sir, we are!’ he said. ‘V12 had a breakthrough with Lieutenant Antok's mask.’
Keith's heart gave a little lift and he looked at Antok. ‘Really?’
‘Yes,’ said Antok. ‘I am currently not wearing that breakthrough. I am wearing one of the prototypes, which I will show you once we have some privacy. But it should be ready within ten days.’
In time for your heat, was what he didn't say, and Keith was very grateful for it. He said nothing about that, just smiled and said, ‘That's amazing - you two are here as engineers, correct?’
‘Yes, sir,’ said Gitun. ‘Explicitly not as a pilot.’
‘That does explain a lot. Unfortunately we do need you all to be able to fly a ship.’
‘Would it help if I had pilot subroutines installed?’ said V12. ‘I feel I am not learning as I should.’
‘You're doing fine,’ said Keith, deciding to give them a break. ‘Honestly, if you'd seen what the Paladins were like at the start… We were pretty sad. That's not an excuse to slack off! Just don't give up, I was useless once too. Anyway… Antok?’
‘Yes. Thankyou, you two. Dismissed.’ Once they were on their way to Keith's quarters, Antok turned to Keith and said, ‘You were never a useless pilot. I know this from Garrison records. You were a prodigy.’
Keith shrugged one shoulder. ‘I still made a pretty crappy job of learning to fly Voltron at first and I was a terrible leader for a while. Also Lance, Hunk and Pidge were all really bad pilots, although if you tell them I said that I'll kick you out of the circle.’
‘Noted, although your opinion that you were a bad leader will have to remain as a disagreement.’
‘I can live with that.’
They went straight to Keith’s rooms, locked the doors and immediately went through the little ritual of changing clothes and getting drinks - olfracta for Keith and green tea for Antok, who had developed a taste for it the last time he’d been on Earth. Antok sat down on the living room couch and Keith sat down on his expansive lap, trailing his fingers through today’s oversized fluffy sweater, which was slate blue.
‘So,’ he said. ‘You said you were wearing a prototype - what does the prototype do? Is it anything I get to see?’
‘Oh, yes,’ said Antok, sipping his tea. ‘The ultimate aim is to have a mask which will make me seem as though I am not wearing a mask at all, and which will hide my scars.’ He traced a fingertip down the scar on Keith’s cheek. ‘Many people are lucky enough to have facial scars which don’t detract from their looks in the least - mine are much more… startling.’
‘OK. And the prototype?’
‘We have got to the point that this mask can show my face as it truly is and still allow me to speak, eat and breathe normally, just as the old one did.’
Keith’s face lit up. ‘Antok, that’s amazing! Can I see?’
Antok hesitated, somehow he seemed to not quite know what to say, and wouldn’t look Keith in the face when he spoke. ‘I have been wearing some kind of mask for nearly eighty Earth years. It feels to me now as if this is my face. To remove it, even if only hologramatically…’
‘Is hard,’ said Keith softly. ‘I know. I shouldn’t have asked it of you. I’m sorry.’
Antok placed a hand on his shoulder, engulfing it completely. ‘No. And you will see, but… I need a moment, is all.’
Keith smiled, placing both hands over the hand on his shoulder. ‘Take all the time you need, I’m right here. Want me to give you a minute alone?’
‘No, stay. Just… stay.’
Keith waited, until after they'd both finished their drinks and he was leaning against Antok's chest, face in the crook of his neck, breathing in his scent of metal and uniform spandex and sweat and green tea and something he was starting to find familiar from Thace - the mellow and slightly chemical smell of Ulaz’s scar ointment.
‘Alright,’ said Antok finally. ‘Keith, you can sit up now.’
Keith obeyed, and Antok took a feel breath and adjusted the mask. He was right about it being shocking, and for a moment keith had no idea how to react as he looked at the ruined face - half of the flesh of the mouth and nose gone, the burns eeling up and turning the pupil of the right eye sightless white.
‘It's alright,’ said Antok. For a moment, only the unscarred half of his face moved, the awful exposed teeth and muscle of the right side lagging before the simulation caught up. ‘You can stare, although I appreciate your trying not to. Aside from Kolivan and the various people on my personal medengineering teams, you are the first person to see this in eighty years. I… know it's horrible.’
Keith put a hand on each of Antok's shoulders, leaned up and kissed him. Antok flinched, eyes wide, then set his hands on Keith's waist and kissed him back - despite what Keith could see, he felt soft lips the entire length of Antok's mouth, and he seemed to have no trouble turning his knees to jelly.
‘I always wondered how many eyes you had under that mask,’ said Keith softly. ‘And you have pupils! You know what a big thing that is for humans? Thace is a hottie but eye contact is a powerful thing.’
‘Is that what the problem with the mask was?’
‘Only partly.’ Keith kissed him again. ‘And Antok? Just so we have this out of the way. I think what was done to you was utterly hideous. It makes me so fucking mad, I hope the people who did it are already dead or I might have to track them down and slice them thinly from the feet up. You are never going to be horrible.’
Antok snorted at the overelaborate threat. ‘Oh, they're all dead. My omega parent's leader killed most of them and then later Kolivan made a special mission to clear up the last two, with extreme prejudice. He thinks I don't know he has their ears pickled in a jar in his quarters.’
‘Good,’ said Keith firmly. ‘So how did you find that out if he didn't tell you?’
Antok chuckled, a deep, rumbling almost-purr. ‘That’s a secret. Can you keep a secret?’ Keith nodded eagerly. ‘I caught him muttering threats to a jar full of ears after the mission where we lost Vrek and Ilun and - well, so many Blades. I wondered why he'd have such a thing and then he addressed one of them by name and it all made sense.’
‘Wow,’ did Keith. ‘That seems like such an un-Kolivan thing to do. I figured he'd, I don't know, meditate or spar or something.’
‘We all have hidden depths. Especially Kolivan. He might be Leader but he fears for us all, often.’
‘Mm.’ Keith thought about it, about all the losses, about all the times he'd failed to follow orders and become the sudden unknown quantity in Kolivan's plans. ‘That must pretty hard on him, huh.’
‘Of course. But you must not let him know that you know. He would be hurt and angry at the intrusion.’
‘Duh.’ Keith petted at the fluffy sweater. ‘I'm not that much of an idiot. He won't hear it from me.’
Antok swatted gently at Keith's back. ‘You are by no means stupid. I am merely making sure.’
‘Cool.’ Then he mentally changed the subject and focussed on the man in front of him. ‘Now, I understand if you want to put your mask back on straight away but I'm hoping you can leave it off long enough to take me to bed.’
Notes:
This one eventually ended up getting divided into two because Antok is big and sweet and fast when he needs to be but my god does he take his time, and so this chapter you're seeing here is almost entirely emotional reveal. Yes, he deliberately softens his outline in order to make himself less intimidating for Keith, that means chunky soft sweaters in calming colours and loose samurai pants and fluffy socks. You may infer that he has had something similar done for him before.
Also I went to see an eye specialist and am feeling better than I have since Christmas! Yay! The bad news is that I kind of need to accept that I am just basically chronically ill and frequently too ill to write, you just need to bear with me and trust that the chapters will come when they do. Shout out to all you spoonies out there!
Happy August, and the smut comes next chapter. Then more smut. Too much smut? You tell me.
Chapter 8: Your Love Is Big And It Swallowed Me Whole
Summary:
In which Keith and Antok fuck.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Now, Keith didn't have to detect Antok's astonishment from his body language; it was clearly written across his face. ‘You… want that? You want… me?’
Keith worked himself a little closer, straddling Antok's enormous thighs, and ground down hard, giving his best fuck-me grin. ‘You think I'd put you to all that trouble if I didn't know I wanted you, whatever was under the mask?’ He took two fistfuls of the cloudy-soft blue sweater and nipped Antok under the chin. ‘I never thanked you for this, by the way.’
‘For what?’ said Antok, sounding mildly stunned.
‘This.’ Keith tugged at the sweater. ‘I can tell you're trying to play down the giant-intimidating-spy-lieutenant bit. I appreciate it. But now I can see your expression I want you to fuck me.’
Antok opened his mouth to say something, then decided against it. ‘Well. Far be it from me to argue with a direct request,’ he said, then picked Keith up princess-style, carried him through to the bedroom and laid him on the bed with utmost care. Looking up at him, Keith noted that under all the scarring Antok had an elegant, strong bone structure and thick, pale hair that would have framed his face if it hadn’t been prevented from falling forward by the mask. One eye was blinded but the other was brilliant dark against the gold sclera and both were well-shaped and expressive. Keith reached up and ran his thumb over what remained of a surprisingly full lower lip.
‘I can feel the rest of your lip when I do that, it’s fascinating,’ he said.
Antok looked away. ‘Quiznak, please don’t. We both know it isn’t real. It’s only a simulation generated by the hood so I can eat and speak.’
‘And kiss,’ said Keith, demonstrating. ‘Who cares if it’s a simulation? I like it, it feels good. Can you feel it?’ Antok nodded and Keith grinned, leaned up and dropped a kiss on his mouth. ‘Good, then you’ll be able to feel it when you eat me out later. You know what that means, right?’
Antok laughed. ‘Yes, I have been familiarising myself with your sexual slang. Also I hope you are aware that this might take longer than you’re used to.’
‘Oh, no, I’m well prepared to take hours working up to take whatever kind of a monster dong you have in there. I slept in this morning.’
‘Good.’ Antok combed his fingers through Keith’s hair over and over, lifting it up off the back of his neck. ‘Because I absolutely intend to take my time with you.’
Keith dropped his chin, looking up at Antok through heavy black lashes. ‘That’s nice,’ he said, pushing a little into the caress. ‘Yeah, sure… take all the time. If we’re still here tomorrow I’m sure the others will understand.’
Antok chuckled and went back to kissing Keith, long and slow and deep, apparently in no hurry to move on from this - Keith let him for far longer than he thought was reasonable, then gave him a little shove in the chest. ‘Antok. Listen, I know I said we could take our time, but-’
‘Then let me take my time with you,’ rumbled Antok. ‘I always knew you were beautiful but I never knew you were so tactile, that your scent was so good or your taste-’ He stole another kiss, ‘so sweet. Let me experience you too?’
‘Wow. Um.’ Keith bit his lip, his eyes tracking Antok’s face. ‘Huh, didn’t know you were so poetic.’
Antok looked down. ‘Yes. Well…’
‘No, I like it. It’s just a surprise. Just… yeah, take all the time you want, do whatever you want, I trust you.’
‘That is quite the change in attitude.’
Keith shook his head. ‘No, I trusted you before, I just can’t deal with people hiding their faces for sex. It is not and never will be my kink. It might even be called an anti-kink.’
‘Oh.’
‘Now kiss me again, please?’
Antok replied with a long, searching kiss, and this time when he broke away, he reached down and peeled Keith's T-shirt up and over his head - Keith raised his arms to help the action, intending to let them fall around Antok's neck once more, but Antok caught his hand, pressing his lips to the palm and licking slowly up each finger.
Keith let out a long, shuddery breath as he made eye contact with the single perfectly-formed large, dark eye. ‘Holy fuck, Antok. I am just gonna stop wondering how you're doing that but that's so hot.'
'Doing what?' asked Antok, a little muffled with his lips pressed against Keith's palm.
'Sticking your tongue out past the mask. You know what, I'm just going to thank Gitun and V12 when I see them next, OK.'
'That's a good idea.' Antok kissed the ball of Keith's thumb, then scraped his teeth lightly over the pounding pulse point at his wrist, pressing his tongue against the vein for a moment. 'You have such elegant hands. So beautiful.'
‘Yeah?’ said Keith stupidly, unable to do anything but watch Antok nibble down the soft inside of his forearm and suck a big, dark mark on the inside of his elbow. ‘Oh fuck. Can we get that sweater off?’
Antok smirked. ‘Impatient?’
‘Suddenly, very.’
Antok dug his teeth in a little in the inside of Keith's forearm, causing Keith to curse and clutch at his shoulder. ‘Alright. I see I must make some concessions.’
It turned out to be not much of a concession, since he was wearing a black T-shirt underneath - although it barely covered his navel and strained around his bulging muscles, and for a moment Keith had to sit back and stare.
‘Holy fuck, Antok,’ he said admiringly. ‘Is that one of Kolivan's? I can count your individual abs through that thing.’
‘One of Thace's, actually,’ said Antok, clearly trying not to look pleased. ‘It was his idea.’
‘Damn.’ Keith reached out and brushed his fingers over the undamaged left nipple. Antok made a soft noise and the nub of flesh hardened visibly under the cloth. ‘Have you been sewn into that? Cause I might not be able to get you out of it without destroying it.’
‘That’s fine. Thace said that’s probably what would happen,’ Antok said, a little breathlessly.
‘Great.’ With that, Keith applied teeth to the neck seam and ripped it open as hard as he could, right down the front, so that Antok's magnificent chest was on display before him. ‘Oh wow. Um.’ He licked his lips. ‘OK, you have to tell me if I should avoid touching anywhere because right now I want to touch you everywhere.’
‘But -’ Antok began, and stopped under a Look from Keith. ‘No, I have had my scars far longer than Thace, they are largely numb.’
‘Got it,’ said Keith, and licked a broad stripe over Antok's nipple, up his chest and sank his teeth into the meat of his shoulder, where there was already a suspiciously mouth-shaped dark bruise, bigger than Keith's lip print. He stroked it thoughtfully. ‘Good to see someone's keeping you happy. Kolivan? Thace?’
Antok actually blushed, at least that's what Keith assumed was happening as his slate-coloured skin turned the teal-grey of a stormy sea, all the way down to his collarbone. ‘I confess that I have never slept with anyone other than Kolivan.’
Keith blinked. It took a few seconds to process this. ‘I'm your first omega? Haven't there been offers?’
Antok hesitated. ‘There have been a few. But there has been no time, and I am too damaged, so many of them backed out as soon as they realised, and after that I simply refused outright for my own wellbeing. So yes, you are my first omega.’
Keith surged up in Antok's lap and pressed their lips together, kissing him with a passionate urgency that made Antok freeze, then pull him close and return the kiss in every bit the spirit it was given. They broke apart panting, and Keith stayed barely an inch away, petting the back of Antok's hood and kissing him occasionally as he spoke. ‘Assholes,’ he said. ‘They're all assholes. You deserve to be happy. Nobody should get treated like that.’
‘You deserve to be happy too,’ replied Antok, running one massive hand down Keith's back and cupping his butt in the palm.
‘We could aim for mutual happiness? And not just because Kolivan will kill me if I make you sad.’
Antok laughed. ‘You could never make me sad. But alright, I like the sound of that.’
‘By the way, my butt holds itself on, if you want some ideas you could start with getting my pants off, I'm getting pretty wet here.’
‘Just making sure,’ said Antok, giving Keith's backside a judicious squeeze. ‘And I know, I can smell it.’ He leaned Keith over so he was propped against the pillows and could watch as Antok leaned down and took a deep, luxurious breath of the steadily-dampening dark cloth covering Keith's crotch.
‘Oh god,’ said Keith faintly, parting his legs almost automatically. The sight of Antok as he licked the fabric was intoxicating, the texture of damp cloth against his cock, and then Antok opened his mouth and engulfed Keith's entire groin and Keith could only whimper.
‘I could become addicted to your scent,’ said Antok and licked him again, making him moan and push up into Antok’s mouth.
‘Fuuuck. Antok, you need to let me get undressed or I’m just gonna come in my pants,’ said Keith.
Antok just kept on licking, and now the front of Keith’s sweatpants was soaking with saliva and slick. ‘Then you should do that,’ said Antok, kissing up the thin trail of black hair leading up out of Keith’s waistband and watching his stomach muscles jump in response. ‘Your clothes can be washed, and then I can lick you clean and explore you some more.’
‘Ohhh… I hope you’re not thinking of waiting until after my pants get washed cause that’s way too fucking long.’
That made Antok laugh, a low rumble that sent vibrations right through Keith’s cock and very nearly finished him. He started pushing at the waistband of his sweats, desperate at least to be free of the fabric that was suddenly too heavy, too hot, too much - Antok relented and helped him peel them down. Keith had given up wearing underwear, at least when he knew he was going to have Alpha company for the night. There just didn’t seem to be much point. So now he was naked, and slick, and his erection was hard against his thigh - and Antok wasn’t doing anything but staring.
Keith raised his eyebrows, arched his back and spread his legs, watching the teal flush spread down Antok’s chest. ‘Look at that, I made Antok of the Marmora blush.’
‘I…’
‘It’s pretty.’
That seemed to take Antok completely by surprise. He blinked, then his face hardened a little and he said, ‘You needn’t lie to me, Keith. I know what I look like.’
‘I’m not a liar,’ replied Keith hotly. ‘And I bet Kolivan would back me up. Does he like it when you blush for him too?’
A short silence, then Antok said, ‘Yes.’
‘And you trust him to tell you the truth?’
‘...Yes.’
‘Well, I’m telling you the same thing, so how can it be a lie?’ Another silence. Keith decided to change the subject. ‘But I just had you between my legs, I nearly came in my pants because of your mouth, you were talking about licking me clean and then I sure as hell hope we can go again because I want your knot tonight.’
‘Are you sure? It doesn’t have to be tonight,’ said Antok.
Keith rolled his eyes. ‘You worry too much. Just trust me when I say I want you and leave the worrying to me, yeah?’
Antok let out a little huff of not-laughter through what remained of his nose. ‘That’s what Kolivan is always telling me.’
‘Well, you should take his advice.’ Keith raised a leg and put his foot on one of Antok’s shoulders. ‘Now, weren’t you doing something?’
‘I was,’ said Antok, leaned down and licked Keith’s cock from root to tip.
Keith whined and arched his back, only to be held down by two hands that felt like they could tear him in two without even trying. Suddenly that was hot instead of terrifying, so he pushed back as Antok kept licking and kissing his shaft, then started lipping at the head - he paused when Keith yelled but continued at the desperate, ‘Don't stop!’
Possibly Antok had meant to deep-throat Keith, but they didn't get that far. At the sensation of warm lips wrapping around his head and a huge hand closing around the shaft, Keith wailed and came, all the world narrowing down to Antok's mouth and then shooting sensation to every part of his body outwards from there.
After a while, he noticed that Antok was licking his lips and looking absolutely smug, which was bizarre to see on the Marmora lieutenant. He caught Keith's eye and raised his intact eyebrow. ‘Again?’
‘Gimme a minute, Jesus Christ,’ gasped Keith. ‘Goddamn, Antok.’ He reached up with a suddenly floppy arm and swiped a stray speck of white from Antok's chin. ‘Sorry, I should have warned you.’
‘Oh, no. That I can make you incoherent so quickly is vastly flattering.’
Keith smirked. ‘So much for taking it slow.’
Antok's returning smirk was almost evil and sent chills down Keith's back. ‘Oh, no. I'm certainly nowhere near done yet.’
‘Well, I’m along for this ride. How about we get your pants off so I can see what I’m actually dealing with here?’
‘Alright,’ said Antok, and untied the soft black wraparound pants he was wearing. The fabric pooled on the bed and he kicked it away, and this time Keith was staring, chewing on his knuckles, his brows drawn in tight. ‘Keith? Is everything alright?’
‘Oh my god,’ said Keith. ‘Okay. I really hope everyone’s right about omega anatomy because that’s huge. Fuck.’
Antok leaned down and scented him, and spread little kisses across his shoulder. ‘I would not dream of even attempting to penetrate you unless I was certain you could take me. I promise.’
Keith nodded. ‘I know. Just… let me up, let me up.’ They sat up and Keith reached out to touch the gleaming blue-purple monstrosity that Antok somehow successfully hid in a skin-tight uniform every day. He could only just get both hands around it. ‘How the hell do you get this into your suit,’ said Keith flatly, spreading slick up the underside and thinking, more than anything, what a long time it took.
‘The suit’s made to adapt to it,’ replied Antok, his voice breathless and faint, and Keith looked up suddenly. Oh, that’s right, he wasn’t just investigating this monster, he was playing with Antok’s cock. A wicked smile spread across his face and he smeared the slick down his throat, eyes locked with Antok, whose mouth fell open as he watched.
‘Hell of an adaption,’ he said.
‘Really, I am… not especially large for an adult galra-Cybrachian hybrid,’ said Antok weakly.
‘Uh-huh.’ Keith traced his fingertips up the shaft, delicately outlining the ripples and the bumps that the slick glands made, and grinned wickedly when Antok inhaled sharply. ‘Problem?’
‘Keith, no, but I am supposed to be-’
‘No. No supposed.’ Keith cut him off, and watched his throat move as he swallowed hard. Keith's eyes narrowed and his smile widened, and he leaned forward to press a slow kiss to Antok's mouth. ‘Just a hunch, do you… like it when I tell you what to do?’
Silence. More silence, and Keith wondered if he'd made a mistake, as Antok stared at him like a deer in the headlights of an oncoming eighteen-wheeler. Then he swallowed again and said - no, croaked - ‘Yes.’
Keith ghosted his fingers over the unscarred side of Antok's face and smiled as Antok turned towards the caress like it was a benediction. ‘Good thing I outrank you in here,’ he purred.
‘Yes, sir.’
‘No, still Keith. You can run any other name by me but not sir. Omega or Commandant are fine too.’
‘Yes, Keith.’
Keith grinned and caught hold of Antok's hand, examining the size of it, the thick, calloused fingers, and thinking how two of them were easily thicker than a human cock. He sucked the first two fingers into his mouth, getting them good and wet - Antok made a sharp intake of air and his other hand tightened on Keith's hip. When Keith finally released him, a trail of saliva threading from lip to fingertip, Antok's good eye was almost totally dark. Keith hadn't felt this triumphantly smug since he'd had the purr of a hoverbike between his thighs, and this was arguably even better. He leaned back and spread his legs.
‘You know what to do,’ he said, looking up at Antok through his lashes.
Antok nodded, spellbound. As he loomed over him, Keith reached up to draw him into a kiss, one that muffled his ecstatic whine as Antok pushed one thick finger into his hole. He thought he'd have to beg for another but Antok was far more astute; he responded to Keith's bucking desperately against his hand by sliding another finger alongside the first. It felt like heaven and Keith could have declared everlasting love then and there; instead he just arched and sobbed and gabbled ‘moremoremore’ into Antok's mouth as Antok stretched and scissored him judiciously.
At the touch of the third finger, Keith shrieked and came, body tight as a bowstring, nails digging pink lines in Antok's back. For a moment, there was silence, only Antok's scent, the eternally warm sensation of being cradled against Antok's chest, his old-tractor purr, the deep, even sound of his breath.
‘How do you feel?’ said Antok eventually, quiet but close enough that the sound seemed to be right inside Keith's head.
‘Mm. Really good,’ replied Keith. ‘I love your hands.’
There was a low chuckle which echoed through them both, and then Antok handed him a water pouch. ‘Drink up.’
‘I give the orders here, remember?’ grumbled Keith, but he did drink.
Antok kissed the top of his head, wiping the sweaty hair out of his eyes. ‘I'm still the alpha though. I take care of you.’
‘OK, that's fair.’ Keith finished the water pouch and threw it across the room to deal with later. Then he turned over and wrapped his arms around Antok's middle. ‘If we have a nap, do we have to start again?’
‘Getting tired?’ asked Antok, petting Keith's hair.
‘Lil bit. Might take a little bit longer to get it up this time, at least.’
Antok smiled and scented him briefly. ‘That's normal outside of heat, especially with the number of alphas you maintain. Sleep a little, then I will wake you and if warming you up is set back a little, what of it? It's a vastly pleasurable activity.’
‘Thank fuck, I was sort of afraid it might be a chore.’
‘Never. Now sleep.’
Antok woke him twenty minutes later with a kiss, which would have been a lot more romantic if Keith hadn't startled awake and instantly started flailing at his imaginary attacker.
Antok took the punch to his shoulder and reeled back; Keith focussed, sat up and let Antok hold him close as his hammering heart calmed down again. ‘Fuck. Sorry, Antok, I thought you were…’ He stopped.
‘It's alright. It was my fault, I should have known.’
‘We’re all kind of fucked up, aren't we?’
Antok made a humourless huff of laughter against Keith's hair. ‘A little. But it's better than being fucked up alone.’
‘Words of wisdom, those. And now I think you should be kissing me.’
Antok didn't speak, just cupped Keith's face in both huge hands and tipped it up until their mouths met, Keith's already opening to let him in. When they finally parted, it wasn't far, foreheads barely touching, Keith watching the movement of those eyes he'd thought he'd never see.
‘Antok. I want you so fucking badly right now.’
Antok smiled, and Keith felt the movement against his mouth. ‘Not long now,’ he said, and then there was the brush of fingertips against his thighs. He spread his legs eagerly, already slick, and arched up to Antok's clever touch.
Antok didn't try to give him the entire hand but it didn't matter; under his careful ministrations Keith came again, and once more, and was writhing and whining and begging that please, he could take it, don't make him wait any longer.
Eventually, just as Keith thought he was about to lose his mind, Antok withdrew his hand with a sickening slick sound and trailed hot wetness down Keith's chest - he arched to meet it without hesitating.
‘Can you sit up?’ asked Antok, his voice husky. Keith nodded and bit his lip, and Antok's good eye suddenly darkened.
‘Oh fuck, Antok. You look amazing.’
‘If only you could see what I see right now. But come. Kneel up for me.’
Keith obeyed; Antok lay back and helped him straddle his enormous hips - it was a good thing Keith was flexible; even so he'd probably have aching thighs tomorrow. Today, though, he braced his hands on Antok's chest while Antok steadied him with one hand on his hip and guided his huge, slick cock home with the other. Keith was partly thinking about how that couldn't possibly fit, but he was also vaguely aware of something wrapped around his waist - oh, right, Antok's tail. And then he was being breached, and there was the tight, hot ache… but no increase in pain, just a feeling of increasing fullness.
‘Mother of god, Antok,’ he gasped.
‘Hn,’ said Antok, his entire face crunched in concentration.
It took an age, seemingly sex distorted time just like collapsing stars, but finally Keith was sitting in Antok's lap and trying not to come immediately from the firm pressure on his g-spot.
‘Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck,’ he swallowed hard and looked down at the new slight bulge in his abdomen. He patted it in disbelief and looked up at Antok. ‘What the fuck? Antok, this should have ruptured something in a human.’
‘You are not human,’ replied Antok faintly. ‘How do you feel?’
Keith swallowed again. ‘Full. Good. Really horny. In a minute my legs are gonna stop shaking so I hope you're ready for that.’
Antok grinned. ‘I feel I have never been ready for anything more.’ He reached up and brushed slimy fingertips across Keith’s lips, Keith nipped at the touch and sucked the first two fingers into his mouth. The taste of Antok’s slick was strange - Keith had expected it to taste like come but it didn’t, instead it tasted more like Antok’s scent in concentrated form. It definitely helped Keith ground himself, and soon he released Antok’s hand, took a deep breath and rolled his hips downwards.
It was almost too much, and this time the moan came from both of them in tandem. Keith curled his fingers against the broad expanse of pectorals beneath him and did it again, a little more shallowly this time, but picking up speed every time.
‘Ah, fuck… Antok, I… Antok…’ he gasped, and whatever else the thought had been going to be dissolved as shocks of pleasure punched through him with every movement of his hips.
‘Keith,’ purred Antok. ‘Don’t stop, you’re perfect.’ A massive paw closed around Keith’s leaking erection and he clenched his teeth around a squeal.
‘Fuckin’ - Antok, no, don’t, I don’t know how, oh, how much more I’ve got in me tonight, I, I, I want you to knot me, goddammit.’ He braced his hands on Antok’s chest and forced himself up on shaking legs, and then Antok’s hands around his thighs and butt were supporting him, making it easy to lift himself up and drop back down. ‘I don’t know what’s - hahhh - gonna happen when you do, but you gotta.’
‘You don’t. You don’t have to talk,’ Antok grated out between his teeth, and Keith snarled back at him.
‘Guess I’m just, ohh fuck, just a chatty bitch, huh.’ Then he smacked his fist down on Antok’s unburned shoulder in frustration and a shower of sweatdrops falling from his forehead. ‘Can’t - get - faster!’
Only half of Antok’s face could make a wicked grin, but he made one all the same, then suddenly caught Keith around the waist and flipped him over onto his back, hitching his legs almost up as far as they would go - which turned out to be almost to Keith’s ears before Antok stopped, staring.
Keith stared back up at him, panting and gleaming with sweat. ‘I can get my feet behind my head, what’s the big deal? You’re gonna fuck me, right? So give it. Come on, please, I’ll beg.’
‘That’s not necessary,’ replied Antok. He leaned down, smudged a kiss across Keith’s lips - Keith tried to chase it back up - and then started fucking him in earnest. Now that he could entirely let go, Keith simply hung onto the pillow, threw his head back and shrieked as pleasure rapidly overwhelmed him - and just when he thought he was about to come, Antok changed the angle a little and pushed him to even further heights. By the time he finally came he’d been nearly delirious and very loud for some time, and the sensation of the smaller omega’s body pulsing around him pushed Antok over the edge after him.
It was a while before Keith could focus enough to remember where he was, who he was with and why - for a while there was only the pleasure and the heat, centred on the knot. The next thing he registered was a dull ache in his thighs, and tried to straighten them out, only to find that someone was holding him bent double - not for long, though, almost immediately he tried to move, he was released and muscular, warm arms wrapped around his back instead. He clung to those arms and scented their owner, head still spinning, and things started to come back a lot faster. Antok was cradling him close, lips pressed to his forehead, purring deep enough to vibrate both their bodies. And Keith was crying. He didn’t know why, but tears were streaming down his cheeks and dropping off his chin.
He looked up and nuzzled into the curve of Antok’s jaw. ‘Antok?’ he croaked. Wow, he must have done a lot of shouting just now.
Antok looked down at him. ‘There you are. I thought I’d hurt you horribly. How are you?’
Keith dashed the wetness off his cheeks with the back of his hand. ‘Pretty good,’ he said, and smiled. He looked down between them to where they were still joined, there was a mess of slick and jizz on both their stomachs and his own belly was noticeably bigger than before. His brows shot up. ‘Wow, and I thought the bulge from your cock was big. Is that the knot making it bigger?’
‘Partly. But also I came in you - it’s temporary, I promise.’
‘I believe you.’ Keith kissed him again. ‘Fuck, that was incredible. Well worth the wait.’
Antok smiled like he’d been handed a trophy. ‘You have no idea what that means to me.’
‘Don’t I?’
Antok paused. ‘Not wholly, at least.’ He snagged a couple of water pouches and a cloth from the shelf above the bed and let Keith rehydrate while he set about attempting to clean them up as best he could. ‘Unfortunately we will be connected like this for a little while, so I feel it may be best if you try and get some sleep.’
Keith nodded. ‘Sure. Normally it’d be difficult with something this size in my cooch but I just got a hell of a workout.’
Once they’d both finished their water, Antok folded Keith up in his arms once again and they dropped off to sleep almost instantly. Ten minutes later they were woken by the knot going down enough for Antok to pull out - which was a slow, tortuous process now, as Keith’s body had decidedly had enough for the night and every slick gland bumped against his over-sensitive and heated rim, followed by a gush of jizz that would have excited Keith before, but now he only saw it as something stopping them from sleeping.
Antok refused to let him deal with any of it himself - he changed the filthy bedlinen, then brought clean cloths and wiped Keith down till he was really clean, then tucked them both into the bed together. By the time the covers folded over his shoulders, Keith was already asleep, snoring gently into Antok’s armpit.
Notes:
This one was basically all sex scene, and what's wrong with that, and Keith's due to go into heat pretty soon so it's a damn good thing you people seem to like my smut. Now I've finished Blades & Bees this *may* go faster, except I may have to start a second fic to work on when I'm creatively dead-ended here - I seem to work better when I have two or more things to switch between. I'm thinking of digging Words On A Stubborn Heart out of its hole - but then I might also make the odd little thing for the Crit Role fandom.
PS: The chapter title is a misquote from the Alanis Morisette song 'Head Over Feet', just so you know. Oh, I keep meaning to say, this is Keith's song for this: https://youtu.be/JG8oc87oncs '9 Lives' by Mad Sin.
Chapter 9: Precursor
Summary:
In which Keith is in preheat - and everyone is getting ready.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Over the next ten days, Keith started to settle into something resembling a routine. On the second day Ulaz noted the plethora of bruises littering his skin, how his hole was starting to look a little raw and the fact that he’d strained a thigh muscle, and told him to take a stint in the healing pod and did he realise, he didn’t have to have sex every day. That was news to him - and when he asked Kolivan about it, the expression on Kolivan’s face said instantly that the idea that Keith should have thought otherwise hadn’t even crossed his mind.
‘I’m so sorry,’ he said. ‘I have failed you as your leader and your alpha.’
Keith almost denied it, but he hadn’t gone to the pod yet, and his thigh muscle ached maliciously at him, so he shrugged one shoulder. ‘You can make it up to me.’
He watched the hope dawning in Kolivan’s eyes and knew he’d made the right answer. ‘How? You know this is no small thing.’
‘I’ll think of something.’ Keith put his arms out. ‘In the meantime kiss me and then you can carry me to the healing pod. My leg hurts.’
‘Of course.’ Kolivan tipped Keith’s face up and kissed him, then picked him up with the utmost care and carried him off to the pods.
So after that Keith spent his days teaching piloting and combat to the new students, ruling his circle from his little palace full of noise and warmth and good food, and having sex when he felt like it - which was quite a lot.
Each of the Blades was so different - they fucked differently, clearly they liked Keith for different reasons and he liked them back for different reasons.
Thace’s need to worship him completely ceased to be unnerving after a short while and became just another alpha thing, and rather cute, especially his obvious delight whenever Keith praised his food. Ulaz’s careful, methodical ways had also taken a little getting used to but now Keith always felt secure in his hands, he liked his firm, muscular body and especially how he always seemed fascinated by the process of taking Keith completely to pieces and making a total sweaty mess of him. While Ulaz being calm and in charge was sexy, Kolivan getting frustrated at Keith for refusing to obey was arguably even better, although his quiet command was hot pretty much everywhere, which might start to be a problem eventually. Antok of course, huge and self-depreciating and careful, insistent on taking his time, all night if necessary, to make sure Keith had a good time and wasn’t ever hurt by him. And then there was Regris, with his actual prehensile tentacle dick and total control over his fangs and forked tongue, all of which meant Keith got exhausted fast but meant Keith didn’t sleep much when he took Regris to bed. In fact once Keith took Thace and Regris to bed at the same time and it worked beautifully, Regris’s energy divided among two people, and he and Thace made the exciting pair he’d always thought they would.
And then on the eleventh day he woke up sweating.
He wrenched himself out of Thace’s arms, grabbed at Kosmo without really thinking about it and the two of them vanished, to reappear in the bathroom, just in time for Keith to throw himself over the toilet and empty his stomach. After a few seconds a warm hand appeared rubbing circles on his back, the other scooping his hair out of his face.
‘It’s OK, nothing’s wrong,’ said Thace soothingly, pressing his nose to Keith’s neck. ‘You’re about to come on heat.’
‘I know,’ said Keith, between heaves.
‘Of course you do.’ Thace stayed there till Keith had stopped puking, then walked him into the shower and washed his hair for him. ‘So how did Kosmo know where to take you?’ He nodded to where Kosmo was pacing around anxiously in the bathroom.
‘Dunno exactly,’ said Keith. ‘He’s been around for a bunch of my heats, though, and Mom’s too. He knows what they smell like and how they go.’
‘Oh, yes, I heard about the space whale. How did you even handle heats there?’
‘Badly. You wouldn’t believe how badly. Just… Mom and Kosmo would feed me as best they could and I’d get real acquainted with my right hand. Mom would give me backrubs sometimes but it got so fucking awkward so I made her stop.’
Thace paused, then pulled Keith tight against him, nose pressed against his neck. ‘Quiznak, Keith. Nobody should have to go through that. I promise you will never have to go through another heat like that again.’
Keith laughed softly, a sound which dissolved into a little choking sob. ‘Yeah, I… sometimes I catch myself thinking that and I don’t dare complete the thought in case it turns out to not be real.’
‘Well, it’s real. I promise. Even if all the rest of this fell apart I would fight the empire all over again to keep that promise. You believe me?’
The smile dropped off Keith’s face and he blinked up at Thace. ‘Don’t… don’t say that. Just don’t.’
‘What?’ said Thace, all concern. ‘What’s wrong?’
‘Just don’t make that kind of promise. Don’t do it, Thace!’
‘I… alright. If it makes you feel better, I won’t. Are you alright?’
Keith’s laugh was a touch hysterical now. ‘I’m coming into heat, I’m starving and tired, I feel sick still, I somehow feel hot and cold at the same time, I’m prickly all over and my emotions are really not under my control, yeah, I’m fine.’
Thace stared at him for a second, then turned off the shower and wrapped him in a huge fluffy towel, with another for his hair. ‘Well, I can fix at least one of those problems. Shall I call Krolia? I think we should.’
Keith wilted. ‘Yeah. And Ulaz too.’
The standard uniform for occasions when Keith was unhappy or tired or unwell in any way had become the hippo onesie - there were now three of them ready, so that there would always be a clean one waiting in case of emergency. Thace retrieved one from the bathroom shelf and helped Keith into it, then saw him wrapped in a blanket on the couch under Kosmo’s watchful eye - he dozed off again almost instantly - before calling Krolia and Ulaz and vanishing into the kitchen.
When Keith woke up again, the room smelled like cooking and he was aware he was being watched - Krolia on one side, Ulaz on the other, and Kosmo had remained dutifully in place as his pillow.
‘Buh - Oh. Hi Mom, hi Ulaz. What’s up?’
‘Your heat, apparently,’ said Ulaz. ‘And right on time, too.’
‘Hi, honey,’ said Krolia. ‘Kosmo’s been guarding you well, huh? How about I leave you with Ulaz while I take him outside and feed him?’
Keith stared at Kosmo. Oh yeah, that’s right, he’d been standing vigil since the second Keith had woken up this morning. ‘Damn, yeah, could you do that? He’s been such a good boy. He always is.’
‘He knows how these things go,’ replied Krolia, reaching out to ruffle Kosmo’s mane. ‘Come on, Kosmo, you can stand down now, Keith’s in good hands.’
Kosmo looked doubtfully at Ulaz, then back at Keith, who smiled and nodded, then back at Krolia, and vanished, taking her with him. When they were gone, Ulaz sat down in Kosmo's place - Keith curled up miserably in his lap - and called out, ‘Thace, he's awake!’
An answering call of, ‘Be there in a tick!’ came from the kitchen, and then Ulaz occupied himself with combing his fingers through Keith's tangled mass of hair.
‘Look at you, gesg tra. Don't worry, we're going to take the best care of you.’
‘Whatever you just called me I'm definitely not right now,’ mumbled Keith. ‘I'm a fucking mess.’
Ulaz smiled and leaned down to give him a gentle kiss. ‘You are still a sweet thing no matter what state you're in.’
‘Oh. Ulaz, why do I feel so tired before heats? Mom didn't know either.’
‘Your body is storing energy for the heat. You’ll need it.’
‘As far as I can tell you've never been properly fed or rested before your heat,’ said Thace, sitting down at Keith's other side. ‘Partner or no partner that's bad. So sit up and eat, my darling.’
Keith grumbled at being made to move, but Ulaz tipped him upright and then he was looking down at a bowl of what appeared to be entirely Earthly oatmeal. He blinked at it, and directed a baffled look at Thace.
‘I thought you'd prefer something familiar and easily digestible,’ said Thace. ‘It’s not exactly the same grain you’re used to, and Lance’s farm’s crop isn’t ready yet, but this one is very similar in taste, texture and molecular structure. The honey is from Lance’s farm, though.’
‘I. Okay. I’ll give it a shot,’ said Keith, a little stunned, but he took the spoon and ate. He was ravenous, and finished two and a half bowlfuls before he declared himself beaten. By that time, Krolia and Kosmo were back, and Thace gave up his place beside Keith to Kosmo and vanished back into the kitchen.
‘Is he staying in there?’ asked Keith, watching him go.
‘Oh, he was cooking the entire time you were sleeping,’ said Ulaz. ‘He's determined to be ready for your heat. In fact if he isn't careful I may have to stop him, make him rest - but don't worry about that, that's my responsibility, not yours.’
‘Mm,’ said Keith sleepily.
‘Oh, tired again? Need to go back to bed?’ Keith yawned and nodded. ‘Well, alright, come on then.’ Ulaz picked Keith up - Kosmo growled but Ulaz just looked at him and said, ‘We're going to the bedroom. Are you coming?’ and made a couple of false starts until the huge wolf started pacing alongside.
Once there, Kosmo jumped on the bed first and so Ulaz laid Keith down against him as if he were a sofa cushion. Keith snuggled back into the thick fur, then blinked up at the narrow face above him.
‘Stay?’ he whispered.
Ulaz smiled. ‘Of course.’ He stripped to his underwear and got in beside Keith, stroking his hair back from his face. ‘Just say the word and you never have to be alone again.’
Keith smiled back, tucked his face in the crook of Ulaz's shoulder and fell asleep.
Over the next three days, Keith slept and ate, wandering around in a sort of daze, usually with an anxious Kosmo on one side and whichever Blade was watching him now at the other. By the end of the first day he’d decided that clothes were completely unnecessary and was slouching to the bathroom for a shower in nothing but his skin. Kolivan watched Kosmo nudge him gently along, stopping him bumping into furniture and doorways and refusing to let Ulaz help, then turned to Krolia, who was sitting on the sofa beside him.
‘So… was he like this on the space whale?’
‘You mean… with the total disinterest in who sees him naked?’ said Krolia. ‘Not at first. It was actually very embarrassing for both of us, the first six months or so. But we had each had two years of heats ahead of us, and so we got used to the idea eventually. Nobody here is seeing anything new, so why should he care?’
‘Did he act this way at the Garrison? Or in the Castle of Lions?’ said Kolivan.
‘No. Generally he’d be confined to his room for the duration. It was harder for him with Shiro around, of course - he wanted so badly.’
‘But you must both have had a most trying time.’
‘Yeah,’ said Krolia. ‘It was pretty bad. But there were good times too, I got to know Keith and that was better than anything.’
In the bathroom, Keith heard none of this, which was definitely for the best. Instead he was trying not to fall asleep standing up in the shower as Ulaz washed his hair - now one of Keith’s favourite things. A jolt and a pair of strong hands under his arms hauling him up, and Ulaz said, ‘Don’t fall! Keith, maybe we’d better sit down for this.’
‘Nooooo… I’ll totally fall asleep then,’ mumbled Keith.
Ulaz activated the bench and steered them both to sit down. ‘Maybe it doesn’t matter. Don’t worry. Sleep all you like, eat all you like and then when you wake you will have all the energy you need. Pre-heat is exhausting, I’m told.’
But his only audience was Kosmo. Keith had already fallen asleep against his chest, so he smiled a little to himself and got on with rinsing the soap out of the inky curls.
Thace had been cooking as much as Ulaz and his Blade duties would let him, and now the suspended animation food storage in Keith’s rooms was stuffed to the brim. Regris had been taking extra tank time so he could be sure he wouldn’t dehydrate. The Marmora was under Krolia’s command for the duration, since all the other officers would be otherwise occupied.
As expected, like clockwork, Keith came on heat.
He woke up in the middle of the afternoon, suddenly wide awake and wanting, needing to be touched so much that it felt like he might shrivel up from the sheer empty loneliness. Not just that, he was scared - heats were painful, solitary things, where he reached out into the void of his chaotic mind and found at worst gleeful hostility and at worst… nothing.
He whimpered, and instantly long, strong arms gathered him close and there were lips against his neck, scenting him.
‘It's alright, gesg tra. I'm here.’
‘Ulaz?’ Keith turned in his arms and buried himself, shivering, against Ulaz's chest. ‘Oh fuck. Don't let me go.’
‘I won't, I won't. There's no need to be afraid, nothing here will hurt you and you're not alone anymore.’
‘Promise?’ said Keith thickly, audibly fighting back tears.
‘I give you my word as a Blade of Marmora. Do you believe me?’
Keith nodded, and scrubbed a hand across his eyes. Kosmo nudged him and whined at Ulaz, who smiled at the wolf. ‘Good. Now I am going to summon Regris and Thace, and we will begin getting your needs properly taken care of. Incidentally you know crying in heat is normal, yes? Even if your emotions don't seem to immediately match.’
Keith stared at him in owlish wonderment, and then burst into tears. Ulaz laughed softly, kissed him on the back of the head and called Regris and Thace in turn. ‘They should be here soon. We'll call Antok and Kolivan later, we don't want you getting overwhelmed too fast. Is that alright?’
Keith nodded again, then realised he'd gone effectively non-vocal, gulped hard and said, ‘It's… it's fine. I just… I never looked forward to a heat before. It's… a lot.’
Ulaz kissed him, and Keith leaned up hungrily into the kiss, grabbing handfuls of the mohawk on the back of Ulaz's neck. When they parted, with another little kiss for luck, Ulaz said, ‘I hope you will look back fondly on this one, too. And all the heats to come.’
Keith tipped his head back to look into Ulaz's face, the yellow already starting to bleed into his scleras and his pupils turning cattish - not that it was easy to tell, from how dilated they were. All the colours were brighter, contrast was higher, a faint sheen of purple shimmered over Ulaz's skin and the same colour lit up his eyes and scent glands and, when he spoke, the inside of his mouth too. Curious, Keith leaned in and licked one of the shining violet patches on Ulaz's neck - Ulaz groaned and tightened his embrace and an intoxicating scent-alpha-safe taste exploded into Keith's mouth. He gave a shuddering sigh and did it again, sure now that this was what he needed, what he'd always needed.
‘Keith,’ gasped Ulaz.
‘You taste amazing,’ mumbled Keith.
‘I’m your alpha, of course I-’ said Ulaz, then stopped. ‘You've never had proper alpha scent during your heat, have you?’
‘Nuh-uh. Well, there was-’
‘He doesn't count.’
At this point Keith, who hadn't raised his head from Ulaz's neck since his Discovery, was aware of the mattress dipping on the other side, and another strong scent in his periphery. He looked up, and it was Regris, shimmering purple everywhere to the point that he almost had a halo, and behind him Thace who for some reason was still dressed and not making any move to fix that.
‘Hi, Aglorrah,’ said Regris fondly, leaning in to kiss Keith - he tasted glorious, and Keith barely heard that someone was saying his name.
‘Keith? Keith? Darling, can you hear me? Regris, let him go - Keith?’
But when Regris attempted to release him Keith clung on like grim death, licking his way down the side of the scaly throat and sucking lightly on his scent glands - it was amazing he hadn’t really been aware of them before, one on each side of the throat, tucked away behind the ears, but of course they were here, this was where any galra’s scent came from, he should have worked this out before his heat - before this heat in particular - lit it up for him in full living colour.
Regris’s throat was moving under his mouth. He was trying to talk. Keith looked up, but Regris was looking away, he wasn’t talking to him - great, that was fine, he put his head down, only to find a finger slipped hastily into his mouth and a broad hand turning his head carefully around. He knew that taste, too, although it wasn’t so strong just from a fingertip. Thace.
‘Darling? Can you hear me?’ Keith nodded, and Thace smiled and took his finger back. ‘I just need your attention for a minute. I’m going to take Regris away and the two of us will eat - we can’t handle your heat on air alone - and then come back with food for you, and Ulaz will get his breakfast, but while that’s happening you won’t be left alone for a second, I promise. Do you understand?’
Keith nodded. ‘I’m not hungry though,’ he said, a shade petulantly. ‘Not for food.’ He had a hand between his legs, playing with himself without really thinking about it, and the air was thick with the smell of heat and slick.
‘I know. That’s why I’ve stocked up on things that are easy to eat and give you lots of energy. Don’t worry about a thing.’ Thace kissed Keith - Keith was breathing hard now, every nerve alive and starting to feel too hot and too cold both at once - and grabbed a hair tie off the shelf to twist his unruly locks up off his face and neck. ‘Now I’m going to take Regris and Kosmo away and leave you with Ulaz, alright?’
Keith whined, his neck suddenly feeling cold and exposed, but then Ulaz scented him and he relaxed, still panting desperately. ‘Yeah. Yeah, alright. Please don’t take long.’
‘We won’t. Kosmo?’
Kosmo growled. Keith glanced at him out of the corner of his eye - he was glaring at Thace, hackles up, determined to stay near his charge. ‘It’s… it’s OK, Kosmo, go with Thace. I’m gonna be fine. My alphas will take good care of me.’
It felt like a lie, or words out of someone else’s face, and Keith didn’t quite believe himself as he said it - that he could have alphas, or that anyone would devote themselves to him that way. But he smiled, and Kosmo grumblingly got up and followed Regris and Thace out of the room.
Notes:
I did actually think this was going to be a MUCH shorter part of what I've been thinking of as 'the heat chapter' which may end up being like two or three chapters, what can you do. It seems to me that most preheat that I see is barely distinguishable from *actual* heat - so I thought I'd mix it up a little.
Oh, and Keith has had quite a lot of heats! They've all been bad. The ones where he wasn't getting tormented by Griffin, he didn't have any sort of heat partner, so they were very lonely and really pretty painful - and to just get your minds out of the really dark places, there was no incest or bestiality on the space whale. Kosmo did get very protective of both Keith and Krolia, though - he is, as we all know, a good boy.
Love you all! <333
Chapter 10: All I See Is All I Need
Summary:
Keith's heat really gets underway, his alphas take care of him and Regris gets a little carried away...
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Keith looked pleadingly up at Ulaz, shimmering purple as his heat-enhanced vision picked up every drop of scent on his skin. He knew what he wanted, he just didn't know what would happen if he tried to reach out and take.
‘Ulaaaaaz…’ he moaned.
‘I have you,’ murmured Ulaz, and he did. He gently but confidently eased Keith into his lap with the confidence of one well used to handling insensible patients, then slid a hand down between them to take hold of Keith's cock. Keith yowled and twisted in Ulaz's hand, trying to get more of the sensation and then realizing he needed slick.
Luckily, Ulaz realized at nearly the same time, muttering apologies and sliding his hand lower to scoop up slick from Keith's already soaking entrance and smooth it over his cock.
‘Oh god oh yes more,’ gasped Keith, licking Ulaz's scent glands over and over. ‘Fuck, you taste incredible, does your cock taste even better?’
‘I thought you hated that,’ said Ulaz, a twist of a laugh in his voice.
Keith hesitated, aware that his mouth was watering, and licked his lips. ‘I… dunno. I don’t know anything.’
‘Yes you do, Keith. Only you know what you really need. You know what you’re feeling. What do you want right now?’
‘Fuck, don’t make me taaaalk…’ whined Keith, but he did his best. ‘’M too hot, it’s better when you touch me, I feel so empty, you smell so good, I want more of your scent…’
‘Only you can tell where the scent is strongest. This is for you, remember.’ Ulaz finished his sentence by sliding a long middle finger up inside Keith, who cried out and dug his fingers into Ulaz's sides.
‘Hold still a minute, lemme think,’ gasped Keith and Ulaz obediently froze, letting Keith sag against him, panting and trying to gather his fractured thoughts. ‘I… it scares me, OK? The last time, it hurt. A lot. For a long time after.’
‘Nobody’s going to make you do anything you don’t want to,’ said Ulaz.
‘Yeah, I know,’ said Keith. He looked down between them, and much as he’d expected, his own skin was just as scent-shiny as Ulaz’s, but everywhere there was slick stood out in sharp relief, almost glowing in iridescent blue and purple. He swallowed and his eyes widened. ‘I might have to give it a shot, though. Later.’ He reached down and dragged his fingertips up Ulaz’s cock and sucked them into his mouth - Ulaz gasped and bucked a little at the sensation - and his eyes went round at the taste, not that it was possible for them to dilate any further. ‘Fuck. That tastes amazing.’
He licked Ulaz’s neck again, sucking hard at the scent gland - Ulaz gasped and when he spoke, his voice sounded strained. ‘Nobody’s going to hurt you. Anything you want, you can have, this is for you, just… ah… don’t worry about a thing, we-’
Then he yelped as Keith kissed him, hard, and ground down onto his hand. ‘Stop talking, more fucking,’ he growled. ‘Gimme more.’
‘Right.’ Ulaz smiled and slid another finger up inside Keith’s hole, causing a gush of slick into his hand, and then a third finger. Keith moaned and pushed back down, arching his back and clinging tight, groping between them desperately to take them both in hand and rock feverishly against Ulaz’s deliciously cool body.
He felt he was burning up - the last time he’d felt like this out of heat he’d had a fever as a kid and had a temperature of 106F, which had really confused the doctors on Earth. There was a reason they called it ‘heat’, he supposed. Everywhere Ulaz touched him sapped away the unbearable heat as well as the horrible need to be touched, to be penetrated, replaced it all with a goal - now they were climbing together towards orgasm and it was going to be perfect.
Ulaz pressed his mouth to Keith’s own scent gland and Keith gave a long, shuddering sigh, winding his fingers in Ulaz’s hair hard enough that it had to hurt but the doctor gave no sign of pain, only thrust his hand harder into Keith, the slick oozing down his wrist and their hips rocking together into Keith’s grasp until Keith froze and came, teeth clamping down on Ulaz’s shoulder, painting white across the pale firmness of his abs.
There were a few moments of dazed silence as he returned to what passed for sensibility, thighs still trembling, and looked down at himself - not only were he and Ulaz both practically glowing with slick, but his jizz on Ulaz’s stomach was bright white, shining brighter than anything else to his heat, which was how he could tell that Ulaz hadn’t come yet but his cock was leaking precome, mixing with the slick and making it oddly beautiful.
Mesmerised, he shuffled down the bed till he was eye-level with Ulaz’s cock, danced his fingers down the shaft and licked his fingertips. It tasted… strange, like a concentration of Ulaz’s scent and also like something metallic and also exactly what he needed. Ulaz coughed, somewhere above him, and he looked up to see him leaning back on his elbows, gnawing on his knuckle and watching him with the air of a wildlife photographer who is getting to film something previously thought extinct and very much hoping not to fuck it up. Keith glanced down again, then back up so that their eyes were locked when he gave Ulaz’s cock a tentative lick.
Ulaz threw his head back, teeth clenched, then looked down again, visibly collected his thoughts and said, ‘Keith… you know I’m going to knot if you do that.’
Keith nodded, and licked him again, more assured this time, gratified to hear him suck in air through his fangs. ‘You can knot twice, though?’
‘Yes… yes, of course. Anything you wa-ha-haaaant…’ The last part of his speech had dissolved as Keith had wrapped his lips around the head of Ulaz’s cock and sucked off the bead of precome that was forming there. He didn’t try and take him in further, just started licking slick and precome off the shaft in earnest, occasionally interspersed with kisses and sucking precome off the head as it formed, which was more and more frequently as Ulaz got closer and closer to his peak - desperately trying not to thrust against Keith’s mouth and succeeding, for the most part, but getting breathier and less verbal as things got more heated. In fact there were only just enough words to warn Keith, ‘Gesg tra, I’m about to-’ and Keith raised his head just in time for Ulaz to come, hard, all over his face and chest.
He stared down at Ulaz, who was on his back, messy and panting with his eyes dilated and his knot swollen, and swallowed the not inconsiderable amount of jizz that had landed in his open mouth. Yes, he thought, as much as thinking was possible right now. Perfect. And, Wow, that fits in me.
Gradually, Ulaz’s eyes focussed on Keith and he smiled. ‘Goodness, I made a mess of you.’
Keith nodded, and licked his lips, searching for more of that taste. Ulaz lifted an eyebrow. ‘You like that?’ Another nod, and so Ulaz sat up. ‘Then let me help you.’ Carefully, he scooped all the mess off Keith’s face and chest with his fingertips and fed it to him; Keith sucked his fingers clean and then went searching for his scent gland once more. Ulaz held him close. ‘You did so well,’ he said. ‘So well.’
‘But now he should eat,’ said another voice, and another weight on the bed. ‘Man cannot live on lazkra alone.’
‘Hello, Thace,’ said Ulaz. ‘Hello, Regris.’
‘You should eat, too. And rest, since you’ve knotted already. There’s lots of food in the kitchen, if you want the jav’amafri hot then just heat it through.’
‘Alright.’ Ulaz turned Keith’s face up and kissed him. ‘Keith? Ready for a change?’
‘I’m not hungryyyyy,’ whined Keith. ‘Not for food.’
‘I know that,’ said Ulaz, tipping an unresisting Keith into Regris’s arms. ‘I’m sure Thace will have something you’ll like, though. I’ll see you later.’ He shrugged into one of the many robes that were hanging up by the bed, and wandered out. Keith watched him go, eyes big and pathetic, and then a gentle hand caught his chin and turned him back to look into Regris's smile.
‘What's the matter, Aglorrah, are two of us not enough for you now? You weren’t saying that last week.’
Keith made an animal grunting sound and kissed him, not at all gentle, and Regris allowed it until his hand went wandering, searching between Regris's thighs for the wonderful tentacle dick. So Regris smacked him on the hand with it and pulled away from the kiss. ‘I'm not going to fuck you till you eat something.’
Behind him, Keith heard Thace snort with laughter, and then he appeared in his peripheral, holding a bag and a water pouch. ‘I knew I could rely on you,’ he said, and took a small lump the colour of cinnamon out of the bag. ‘Alright Keith, if you eat three of these and finish this drink then you're considered fed for now. Open up.’
Barely comprehending, Keith automatically spread his legs, making Regris laugh and Thace sigh heavily. ‘Your mouth, open your mouth.’
‘Oh.’ Keith obeyed and Thace put the bite-sized lump inside, deftly dodging Keith's attempt to suck his fingers. It didn't taste like cinnamon, but Keith was used to Thace's food not matching appearances by now. Instead it was very sweet, with an undertone of tartness, and it crumbled quickly in his mouth and was gone. A second and third went down equally quickly, and then Keith found himself faced with a water pouch - except on tasting it turned out not to be water at all. Much later he would describe it to Lance as ‘some kind of caffeinated energy smoothie’ but right now he concentrated on getting it all down without complaint. It wasn't easy, and by the time he got to the bottom of the pouch he was practically vibrating.
‘Alright,’ said Thace finally, discarding the empty pouch and the bag and returning to scent Keith liberally. ‘All done, now you can do anything you like.’
‘Ohhh.’ Keith leaned back against Thace's chest and spread his legs, one hand reaching up behind him to tangle in Thace's hair and the other scooping up slick from his hole and smearing it over his erection. He stared at Regris, eyes big and dark under heavy lashes, licked his lips and said, ‘Come on, please, fuck me. Don't make me try and talk dirty, I'm so fucking bad at it.’
Regris swallowed hard, exchanged a heated glance with Thace and said, ‘Ba’il ddasimalin rhi, I would not say that at all.’ He crawled over them both, snug in the V of their legs, and Keith cried out delightedly as he felt the muscular softness of the tentacle as it insinuated its way up his thigh and entered him.
‘Do you know how amazing you look?’ asked Thace, reaching around and taking him in hand.
‘Ahh … I'm hoping… hoping pretty good?’ said Keith, automatically rocking between Thace's hand and Regris's dick, which hadn't even reached his core yet.
‘Like every Alpha’s dream,’ said Regris, fangs just touching the underside of Keith’s jaw and sending a dangerous shiver down his spine. ‘Ancestors, I love you.’
‘What?!’
‘Later,’ said Thace firmly. ‘Regris, not now. Afterwards.’
‘Right, right,’ said Regris, hitching Keith’s hips up a little and letting the tentacle swell a little so that Keith could feel every inch of its sinuous, rippling progress. ‘Don’t worry about a thing, just let me make you feel good.’
Keith gasped something incomprehensible - the tentacle had hit his core and latched on, sending sensation bursting outwards into every nerve, and even he had no idea what he’d intended to say, so instead he just dropped his head back on Thace’s shoulder and hung on tight to Regris’s hips. Thace's free hand sliding over his chest and pinching his left nipple to a peak had him grunting and arcing his back, but it was nothing to the howl of protest when Thace actually let go, sitting up and making as if he might leave.
‘Shh, shh, I'm not going anywhere,’ kissing and nipping at the back of Keith's neck, then leaned over his shoulder and drew Regris forward until they were kissing over Keith's head. It was brief, and then Thace was saying something to Regris that Keith didn't hear, something Regris wasn't happy about but nodded as he replied anyway.
‘Wha’s hap’n?’ slurred Keith.
‘Damage limitation,’ replied Regris. ‘Don't worry about it.’ His tentacle sucked a little on Keith's core and Keith obediently didn't worry about it. ‘Now, Thace, hold him steady for me, will you?’
‘Of course.’ Thace's hands were suddenly immovable on Keith's hips, holding him in place.
Keith was strung so tight by his heat that the first two real thrusts sent him right over the edge into the spiraling dizziness of climax, but Regris didn't stop and overstimulation didn't come to claim its price, the orgasm simply seeming to stretch on and on, climbing higher and higher. He caught Regris's face and dragged him down into a hungry kiss, vaguely aware that he had been shouting something and Regris probably trying to say something, and not caring at all.
The second climax slammed into him like a tsunami, leaving him wrecked and breathless and unable to do anything but lie there gasping in Thace's arms and take it as Regris chased his own end. He came again when Regris did; it impacted him hard and shook him down to every cell so he could only sob mindlessly, powerless to even lift his hands. So it took a little while to realise that Regris had tried to bite him, and that the reason why he hadn't was because Thace had blocked it, and Ulaz was sitting behind Regris holding a muzzle over his mouth.
Keith could only stare - Regris didn't struggle, just gestured wildly in Ulaz's grip, looking back at Keith with pleading eyes. But Keith understood nothing right now, least of all this, and started to panic, twisting to look at Thace over his shoulder and back at Ulaz, searching for answers and finding none.
Thace scented him, holding him close. ‘Shh, be calm darling, my treasure, all is well, Regris just got a little carried away. He's fine, he just needs to collect himself. Ask him.’
Keith looked back at Regris - Ulaz had finished fastening the muzzle and no longer needed to hold it on, and immediately released the younger Blade. Regris collapsed into Keith's arms, nuzzling at his throat.
‘You OK, Regris?’ murmured Keith, holding him tight. Regris nodded hard.
‘When the knot goes down I'll take him away and remove the muzzle once I'm sure he's sensible again,’ said Ulaz gently. ‘Then he can come back.’ Regris nodded again.
‘Oh. OK,’ said Keith. ‘Ulaz. You're not touching me.’
Ulaz chuckled. ‘You're right, I'm not.’ Then the bed dipped to Keith's right and Ulaz was scenting the other side of his neck from Regris. ‘Is this better?’
‘Yes. Oh - oh no…’ Both Ulaz and Thace looked disturbed, but caught on fast that Keith was responding to the little pops deep inside of Regris's suckers coming free as what passed for his knot went down.
Both of them tried to hang on but it was ultimately futile, and Ulaz kissed Keith tenderly and assured him, ‘I'll bring him back. Thace, take good care of him.’
‘Always,’ said Thace, and then Ulaz and Regris were gone.
Notes:
Bit of a short chapter this time - if I'm guessing right the heat will take about the next three chapters and I will do my level best not to make it tedious (would a viewpoint change be weird at this point? What with Keith being so out of it...). I figured it was best this way rather than making you wait forever for the entire heat in one go.
I've also been having a bit of writer's block so thanks for bearing with me, but I'm glad to get to one of the major relationship beats in Regris's arc! Incidentally when Thace berates him a little he's speaking Aardru, which the translators don't pick up and Keith doesn't know, so Keith wouldn't have understood even if he had heard him. All this stuff about the biting? We'll get there, I promise. As Thace says, 'after'. Love you guys! <3
Chapter 11: Take Good Care of You
Summary:
In which Thace and Ulaz take excellent care of Keith during part two of his heat.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Keith looked desperately up at Thace, rubbed his scent gland against the inside of the violet thigh and whined softly. Thace bent his head and kissed him, endlessly tender, and murmured, ‘I know, darling, I know. I'm here.’
In response, Keith got his knees under him and lifted his butt - Thace stared at him for a second, gazing up at him with void-dark eyes through a curtain of hair like ink in water, pale face shiny with sweat and lips swollen and wet from kissing. Then he took his place behind him, kneeing Keith's legs apart and sliding a hand down his spine. A high-pitched warble emerged from Keith's throat and he wasn't entirely clear why he'd done it but he felt the faint touch of claws on his back so he pressed his face into the sheets, lifted his backside higher and did it again, louder.
This time there was no mistaking it - Thace wound his fingers in Keith's hair and the hairtie pinged across the room like a bullet. A big hand on his hip steered him gently but firmly into place and Thace growled, a deep, echoing sound that shook Keith to the bone and made him want him even more. So he warbled back, and Thace kept growling, lips against the back of his neck as he finally - finally! - entered him. It was too much and not enough all at the same time, he could feel the stretch and the perfect grounding security where Thace was holding him down, but he wanted more. So he reached back with one hand - clumsily, his hair was in his eyes and he couldn’t see a thing, so when he smacked Thace lightly in the face it wasn’t totally surprising, but eventually he found his scent gland, scraped his fingers across and touched them to his lips.
Thace laughed - at least, the growl stuttered for a moment, and the hand in Keith’s hair lifted to scoop it away from his face. Instead of grabbing a handful of hair again, he offered his wrist - Keith blinked for a second, then his eyes went wide and he seized it, sucking hard on the gland that he hadn’t even known was there and moaning happily. The taste of Thace’s scent was almost a drug, instantly on every tastebud and in his sinuses and flooding his brain with safe-want-alpha-protect, and then Thace reached his core and it was everywhere. It was a miracle Keith didn’t come, but he gasped and bit down, only to have Thace’s grip tighten for a second - no, he hadn’t broken skin, and somewhere on the trembling wire between sanity and the frenzied chaos of heat, he wished he had fangs and enough jaw strength so he could have a hope of reaching whatever it was that was so vital about this, he wanted blood in his mouth and he didn’t even know why.
‘Thace,’ he slurred, lips still pressed against Thace’s wrist. ‘If you don’t fuck me hard right now I will make you leave.’
‘That’s a lie,’ snarled Thace, the growl rippling right down Keith’s spine. ‘You need me.’
‘Yeah. Yeah, I do, I really do, Thace, please… ’
‘Shh.’ Thace scraped his teeth down the back of Keith’s neck, making him sob in response. ‘No need to beg, I need you too, I’ll give you what you need.’ He drew back, giving Keith just enough time to brace himself before the first thrust almost knocked his knees out from under him - Thace adjusted fast, one arm around Keith’s waist so even if his knees gave out he wouldn’t fall, and slowed down a touch, which brought a howl of protest from Keith.
‘No! Faster, harder! Please, give me everything, I want your fuckin’ knot, Thace!’
‘Yesss…’ Thace hissed and sped up, alpha instincts the only thing keeping him from pounding Keith to pieces. Keith came with a wail and an incomprehensible string of verbal clutter that he thought might have been begging, but was too out of his mind to care. By the time he was anywhere approaching back in his head, Thace was still going, and his knot was starting to grow.
Keith didn't think he could come twice in such quick succession, but as Thace’s knot swelled and the hot burst of his orgasm flooded inside him, he cried out and came a second time. Not as intensely as the first, but it left him panting and dizzy in Thace's arms, legs shaking, listening to him trying to get his breathing back under control.
Thace broke the silence. ‘Keith?’
‘Mnh.’
Warm lips on his neck, the security and peace of being scented. ‘You did so well. I'm going to roll us over now.’
‘Sure.’ The feeling of the knot shifting inside him had him moaning and arching, but Thace managed to roll them over onto their sides without incident. Keith yawned. ‘You smell so fuckin’ good. Gimme a minute, I'll be ready to… to…’
‘To do what?’ Thace dropped a kiss on the top of his head. ‘Of course you get tired, even in heat. Go to sleep, you probably won't sleep long, anyway.’
Keith craned his head over his shoulder, trying to look at him. ‘You sure?’
‘Yes, Treasure. Rest. You need it.’ His tone was so firm that Keith had no choice but to obey.
He woke to find the knot gone, leaving him feeling cold and empty, and he reached out for Thace who he could smell was still in the room without even opening his eyes - Thace caught his hand and kissed the knuckles.
‘It’s alright, it’s fine, you were out about fifteen minutes, well done.’
‘Ready to let Thace go rest now?’ said Ulaz, settling down at his other side. Keith whined, but then Ulaz scented him and all the tension - or at least some of it - released and he breathed out, one long sigh into the silence.
‘It’s alright,’ murmured Ulaz against his throat. ‘I’ll stay, you won’t be alone for a second as long as your heat lasts, I promise, we’re your alphas, we’re going to look after you. You believe that?’
Keith nodded. ‘Yeah. OK. Thanks, Thace, have a good rest.’
Thace leaned down and kissed him softly. ‘I’ll try. Ulaz, how’s Regris?’
‘He’s fine. He’s in the hot tub now, you should join him, I’m sure he’d be glad of the company.’ Thace nodded and left, and Ulaz turned his attention on Keith.
Keith waited to be taken, watching him with hungry eyes, and then mounting impatience when Ulaz only looked him over, stroked his hair out of his eyes, fetched a damp cloth from the shelf and started cleaning him up. In fact that was the worst, Keith writhed and kicked and tried to get away from the cloth, but Ulaz flipped him onto his back and held him there as he wiped away the sweat and stickiness - and also all the glorious smell of Regris’s and Thace’s scents, that were powerful on his skin and now just a memory.
‘No, no Ulaz stop it, what are you doing, you’re spoiling the scent, I need that, I-’ Keith was cut off with a kiss, and Ulaz pushed the now filthy cloth into his hands while he combed Keith’s hair up and off his face and neck once more. Keith instantly shoved it up to his face and inhaled, the scent of alpha-home-safe calming him immediately.
‘You’ll be stinky again soon enough, gezg tra,’ said Ulaz. ‘Better get rid of the worst of it before it starts to congeal.’ Keith made a little whimpering sound in reply, eyes following Ulaz’s every movement, and Ulaz watching him in return. Ulaz smiled and licked his scent gland - beneath him, Keith’s entire body twitched. He ran the tip of his tongue around the edge of Keith’s ear, nipped the lobe and Keith whined. ‘Look at you,’ Ulaz whispered. ‘You’re fascinating, I don’t think there’s ever been a human hybrid before, and you’re so lovely - I could spend forever working out how your body works, how to make you moan and writhe and beg. Will you beg for me?’
‘Oh god,’ gasped Keith. He was used to this from Ulaz - Ulaz had always been intrigued by him and delighted in finding out what reactions he could coax from him, but it was playing dirty to do it during Keith’s heat. Of course, that just meant Keith wanted it more. ‘Please…’
Ulaz’s hand trailed down Keith’s chest, making his stomach muscles jump and his hips lift off the bed in automatic response - and then a long fingertip, gathering up the slick drooling out of his slit and spreading it up his cock. Keith sobbed, and his lips formed soundlessly around the word, please, but he had no voice. There were lips on his throat, some of the tension dispersed, enough to let him moan, but he was shivering with need and still Ulaz hadn’t taken him.
‘Tell me how you feel, Keith,’ said Ulaz, his voice soft and very close to his ear.
Keith swallowed. ‘Em.’ The syllable scraped in a dry throat, he had to try again and it still came out as a rasp. ‘Em. Empty. Ulaz, please, I can’t. Don’t. Don’t. Don’t play games, I need, please, Ulaz…’
Ulaz reached out of Keith's field of vision for a moment, then there was a straw at his lips. Keith gulped down a mouthful of water without complaint before pushing it away. ‘Ulaz, please, you want me to beg, this is me begging, you said you'd take care of me, it hurts…’
Ulaz stared at him for a second, then held him close, licking at his scent gland and murmuring, ‘I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I didn't realize, I'll make it right, I promise.’ Then he hitched Keith's knees over his elbows and entered him, still agonizingly slowly, Keith’s back arched up like a bow as he was filled up once more.
‘Better?’ asked Ulaz, finally bottoming out and nipping Keith lightly on the ankle.
Keith made a long hiss between his teeth that might have been ‘yes’ and then croaked, ‘Move.’
Ulaz could do nothing but obey, and it was beautiful. Keith closed his eyes and let himself experience the push and pull between them like a boat in the tide, Ulaz starting gentle and shallow at first but increasing in both force and speed. Keith dropped into the endless void of the mounting sensations, knowing the impact might destroy him but it would definitely be worth it. He thought he was begging for more but it might just have been his lips moving as everything built more and more, touch built on sound and scent and taste until he came with a small scream, bucking and spilling ropes of white across his stomach and chest as electricity ripped through every nerve.
After a few moments he was still dazed, but realised that Ulaz had slowed down and he couldn’t have that. He swatted weakly at Ulaz's face - he missed - and mumbled, ‘No, harder. Don’t stop. Don’t ever stop.’
Ulaz laughed breathlessly and picked up the pace again. ‘I can’t promise that last one, kad’v zi kun, even I have to eat.’ But he kept going, his breath harsh in Keith’s ear and the heavy smack of his thighs against Keith’s suddenly very loud as the knot started to swell. It didn’t take long after that - a few strong thrusts, a strangled gasp, and Ulaz was filling him up like lava inside him. Keith whined and pawed at himself, but after a minute or so, Ulaz was releasing his legs so he could get a hand around Keith’s swollen dick and do the unbelievably easy job of bringing him off again.
They lay there for a little while, panting and messy in the silence, and Keith, his legs still spread, wrapped his arms round Ulaz's back. ‘You always take such good care of me,’ he said dreamily.
Ulaz scented him, kissed the scent mark for good measure, then said, ‘Any of us would. You know that’s what alphas do.’
‘Yeah but especially you.’ Ulaz buried his face in Keith’s hair again, apparently lost for words, so Keith went on without him. ‘Why’d you always call me things I don’t understand?’
‘I have called you two Galra pet names in the past, and the translator doesn’t catch them because they don’t have a real English equivalent. Earth doesn’t have real alphas or so of course there’s no equivalent pet names, and no names for the alpha or omega parent, or in fact anything for the language that accompanies the culture. I’m amazed it managed as well as it did borrowing from animal theory.’ There was a puzzled silence. ‘But you’ll probably understand this conversation after your heat. I should shut up.’
‘Nonono, don’t shut up. I mean I know I’m stupid cause of the heat but you should keep talking. Tell me what you called me.’
Ulaz kissed the top of his head. ‘I called you a feisty omega who thinks he’s in charge.’
‘Oh,’ said Keith, unable to hide the self-satisfied grin. ‘Cool. Keep talking?’
So Ulaz talked. He talked about names he might call Keith, names for alpha and omega parents, names for types of couples and for circles and for roles within circles. By the time his knot was starting to go down Keith would have been a lot more informed if he’d remembered any of it at all, and hadn’t just been focussed on how much he liked Ulaz’s voice.
‘Ah,’ said Ulaz finally, looking up. ‘Time for me to go.’
‘What?’ said Keith. ‘Nooooo…’
‘Don’t worry. Antok and Kolivan will take care of you.’ He pulled out, leaving Keith feeling cold and empty and lonely once more, and kissed him tenderly, before looking up at the much taller figure standing beside the bed. ‘He’s doing pretty well. Very heat-hazy, but still knows what he wants. Please make sure he drinks?’
‘Absolutely,’ said Kolivan, sitting down on the bed. ‘Hello, little Blade. Aren’t you going to give Ulaz a break? He isn’t on heat, you know.’
Antok sat down on his other side and scooped an arm around him. ‘Go, Ulaz. We will take good care of him.’
Ulaz nodded, slipped on a robe and Keith clung to Antok as he watched him leave.
Notes:
In case it isn't clear, Thace gets thrown into kind of a mini-rut in response to Keith during this. Also, all the cultural crap around the A/O thing? I *really* wanna get into that so bad. It will be at least partially explored since Keith is learning about this, and just to clarify, this is not a universe in which there were alphas and omegas on Earth.
One of the hard things about writing a very sex-dense fic is worrying about whether you're getting repetitive - doing things that bug me when I see other writers do them, like using the same word or phrase a zillion times a chapter, using the same description over and over again and so on. I am not saying this to fish for compliments, but if you guys wanna recommend some fics to help me get in the game I would totally appreciate it.
Chapter 12: In The Fire I Burn Up
Summary:
In which Keith spends the end of his heat with Kolivan and Antok, and it's all getting a bit much - but Antok has a gift for him...
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Keith didn't get much time to dwell on Ulaz's absence - as soon as the doctor had vanished through the living room door, Kolivan drew him back into his lap, scenting him deeply. Keith whined and sagged against the cool strength at his back, staring imploringly at Antok in a way that suggested he didn't even care that Antok was still masked.
‘Ancestors…’ muttered Antok.
‘A little patience, Keith,’ said Kolivan. ‘I promise it will be worth it. Are you listening?’ Keith gasped something incomprehensible, pawing at his cock, and Kolivan gave him a little shake. ‘Keith, give me a reply, so I know you still understand me.’
Keith scowled. ‘Yes, ‘kay, how’s it worth all this waiting?’
Kolivan chuckled. ‘Antok has a gift for you.’
Keith blinked at Antok, who seemed to be trying to avoid his gaze and, indeed, had the teal blush covering most of his chest. ‘It's… You've mostly seen it already,’ he said, and raised his hands to his face. The entire mask vanished, hood included, leaving a perfectly unscarred face framed in shaggy lilac hair, smiling with the shy awkwardness of a man who has a complete smile for the first time in eighty years and isn't sure of the etiquette.
Keith stared owlishly at him, then got up on his knees and brushed his fingers through Antok's hair - there was something hard at either side of his head, and he left them alone - and then he said, his voice shaking, ‘Antok. This - you're beautiful. Isn't he gorgeous, Kol?’
‘Indubitably,’ said Kolivan, the smile in his voice undeniable.
Keith missed Antok's glance flicking over his head to Kolivan, mainly because he was busy doing something that he'd always wanted to do and had always been foiled by the hood, and that was scent Antok properly. The smell of scar lotion and electricity and warm, sensual alpha filled his sinuses, together with an undercurrent of anxious tension. Keith glanced up into Antok's face and made a questioning sound.
‘Don't worry, my nerves are not your problem,’ said Antok softly.
Warm lips pressed against Keith's back. ‘He won't stay anxious long,’ said Kolivan, and pushed two thick fingers into Keith's hole, making a frankly obscene squelch with the jizz and slick collected there. Keith gasped and arched his back, clinging to Antok's massive arms hard enough to leave dents in his skin. The sensation of being scented on both sides at once, by two alphas at the same time, had him drifting into a cloud of endless happy contentment so overwhelming that Kolivan’s cock pushing slowly into him almost couldn’t feel any better - almost. Keith put his arms around Antok’s neck and gnawed lightly on his collarbone, not really aware he was doing it. Kolivan spoke to him, but he ignored it, only rocked back against the delicious hardness filling him up - Kolivan was moving slow but while he was surrounded by alpha from both sides, that was OK this time.
‘He’s… a little nippy,’ murmured Antok, stroking Keith’s hair.
‘Let him nibble,’ replied Kolivan. ‘He doesn’t have the jaw strength to draw blood, or sharp enough teeth. Does it feel good?’
‘You know the answer to that.’
Kolivan licked the back of Keith’s neck and thrust in a little harder. Keith keened and Antok’s hands tightened a little on his back. Very close to his ear, Keith heard the purr in Kolivan’s voice as he said, ‘Tell us anyway.’
Antok moaned and said, ‘Yes… yes it does,’ but Keith barely heard him through his orgasm, during which it occurred to him that Kolivan and Antok were flirting with each other over him and he absolutely wanted more of that, to be a part of that, even if he couldn’t think well enough to trade in their banter right now.
Instead he cried out, one of those warbling cries that had had such an effect on Thace, and was rewarded with Kolivan pushing deeper, and the deep thundering purrs of both alphas in reply, vibrating through the broad muscle at his front and back so that it felt like he would be shaken right out of his skin. All the better for it too, every nerve was lighting up with it, it was like being in a full body vibrator and it rapidly became more than he could stand. He gasped and writhed, both trying to grind back against Kolivan and get away from the feeling, unable to decide what he really wanted - it was too much, but without it he thought he might die.
The decision was taken away from him as Antok mumbled something Keith didn’t understand, then Kolivan lifted him up enough for Antok to slide a hand between them and take them both in hand. Keith screamed at the overload of sensation, and then was shouting into Antok’s mouth, struggling to calm down enough to participate in the kiss. In the end he gave up, there was nothing he could do but give himself up to the ministrations of his alphas - Kolivan was really starting to thrust in earnest now and Antok was smearing his cock with slick in time, their rumbling growls shaking Keith’s body as he wailed in return.
When he came he felt Kolivan tense in response, and neither he not Antok stopped, and yet now it really was too much. ‘Fuck - please, wait, I can’t, it hurts, too much…’
Both alphas stilled instantly, and his back and hair were being covered with kisses, he was being scented and gradually the electrical crackle in every nerve calmed itself enough for him to register where he was, what he wanted, that he wanted more. Still, he was gasping for breath too much to speak, so when Antok kissed him on the forehead and said, ‘Better?’ He just nodded and started grinding back against Kolivan again.
Kolivan responded instantly, in little sharp, shallow thrusts, his lips moving against the back of Keith’s neck, and Keith pushed his face into the curve of Antok’s shoulder and slurred, ‘Deeperrr… ’
‘Fuck,’ whispered Kolivan, but he obeyed, and this time Keith didn’t stop him as he pushed the pace harder and faster, sitting up a little to gain more leverage and really slam into Keith’s sloppy hole - Keith only screamed happily and hung on tight to Antok, doing his best to get his knees under him and push his backside up. Antok purred at him and helped support him, and all he had to do was kneel there and take it as finally Kolivan snarled something incomprehensible and came, pulling him tight back against his knot. Then he reached down to scoop Keith up from Antok’s grasp and scented him, hand around his cock for the very few strokes it took to make Keith come yet again - and it was a very small climax, so soon after the last and latest in who knew how many. He was too lost in the feeling of the knot, and the sensation of being scented, as they both collapsed back down on the bed, panting hard.
It was a while before Keith could gather himself enough to reach for Kolivan’s hand, and when he had it, wave vaguely around until Antok got the idea, took the other hand and came up the bed to join them. He didn’t stay holding Keith’s hand, though. He merely smiled, kissed the knuckles, and started…
Keith blinked, trying to work out what he was doing.
Antok was licking the mess off Keith’s chest and stomach, working his way down, and when Kolivan passed a hand over Keith’s cock - making him gasp - Antok paused long enough to suck his fingers clean and lick every drop off his palm. Both of them glanced at Keith to see his reaction but he was just staring, chewing lightly on his lower lip, and when he realised they were looking at him, he started a little, collected every last heat-blurred braincell, grinned and said, ‘Kiss him.’
Kolivan smiled back. ‘When he’s done. I want to taste you in his mouth.’
That made Keith and Antok both flush very interesting colours. ‘Oh my god, Kol. That’s so hot.’ He spread his legs a little more. ‘You heard him, Antok. Leader’s orders.’
Antok chuckled and resumed getting Keith absolutely clean, slightly hampered by the fact that he came again when Antock was sucking his cock, then he licked his thighs clean of sweat and slick and come, and finally the place where he was stretched around Kolivan’s knot still, finishing with a kiss to what he could see of the knot. Keith could only watch, mouth hanging a little open, hand wandering to stroke Antok’s hair that he’d never seen, let alone been able to touch, before tonight.
‘Well done,’ said Kolivan softly.
‘Now kiss,’ said Keith. He watched as Antok crawled up the bed and settled beside him, one arm around him, the other around Kolivan… and then had to look away. It suddenly seemed as if he was invading on a very private moment, like they hadn’t expected him to be there. But then Antok’s hand caught his chin and tipped it up and there were two mouths kissing him at the same time - it was sloppy and uncoordinated and almost instantly dissolved into laughter, but the third wheel feeling had gone. In fact they stayed there, trading kisses between the three of them, until Kolivan’s knot finally went down and he pulled out, easing Keith forward into Antok’s arms.
‘Shall I leave you two alone?’ he asked.
‘No!’ said Keith, and both of them looked at him in surprise. Oh, god, he was going to have to explain, and he didn’t think he had the brain. He swallowed hard, and did his best. ‘You’re… both great. But even better together. I mean…’ He looked pleadingly from face to face for understanding and help.
Antok looked apprehensive, but Kolivan leaned in and kissed him briefly. ‘Antok, you look as though you’ve been rejected. Stop thinking the worst of our Lok kad’v, he clearly thinks the universe of you. He merely means he’s generous enough to let us go on with our ridiculous public displays of affection while he’s stuck in the middle.’ Kolivan’s tone, and the fact that he dropped a kiss on Keith’s head and then on Antok’s lips when he was done, betrayed the fact that he didn’t think it was ridiculous at all, and that far from being stuck in the middle, Keith was very much an object of that affection too.
Antok’s arms tightened around Keith. ‘I… very well. Keith, do you want to turn around or stay as you are?’
Keith tried hard to think. Staying as he was would mean facing Antok and his lovely new face, but if he turned, he’d get to kiss Kolivan this time. He had started rubbing his cock in frustration by the time he realised he couldn’t decide. ‘I don’t knowwww…’ he said. ‘You decide.’
‘Don't worry,’ said Kolivan, ‘I will have plenty of time to see you in future. Antok will stay handsome, but there will only be this one first time that you see it.’
And so Keith stayed as he was, Kolivan and Antok both helping him straddle the waist more than twice as wide as his own and ease himself down on Antok's massive cock. It had never been as easy as this, as smooth as this, and the huge shaft slid in, in one slow, even slide, as Keith clung to Antok’s chest and moaned in blissful relief. Kolivan scented him and he purred, seeming to go into a kind of trance, kneading his fingertips into Antok's fur like a happy cat.
‘Ancestors,’ murmured Kolivan. ‘How does he feel?’
‘Like… like nothing I’ve ever felt before,’ replied Antok breathlessly. ‘Not even himself. Hotter, tighter, slicker… oh, stars.'
‘I would say it was omegas in heat for you but I am sure this one is special.’ Kolivan scented Keith and blinked. ‘However, if you continue to stay still like that I feel this peaceful stage can’t continue.’
Antok let out a breath of a laugh, but as quiet as Keith was, his entire body thrummed with tension and his breathing shivered with need. Antok’s first thrust could barely have been called movement at all, a slight rock in and out of his hips, but Keith gasped, keened softly against his clavicle. Kolivan stroked a hand up Keith's sweat-soaked spine, making him shiver - Antok met his gaze, a little overwhelmed. Kolivan, smiling and dropping his hands to Keith's hips, just said, ‘Don’t worry. We both trust you.’
‘I. Yes,’ replied Antok, dropped his gaze to Keith’s back, shiny with sweat, and started rocking his hips, still shallow, but with a regular rhythm. Bursts of grey flooded Keith's senses at the peak of every tiny thrust - he'd come more times than he could count, he was so overwhelmed and exhausted that the only thing holding him together now was the heat, and that was starting to fade. And yet, still he put his hands on Antok's shoulders, forced his trembling thighs to bear him up and pushed himself down as hard as he could bear.
There was a gasp in each ear, then a kiss on the back of his neck to match Antok scenting him from the front.
‘Let me,’ said Kolivan from behind him, wrapping his hands around Keith's thighs. ‘Let us.’
Keith could only make a bitten-off section of a whine as Kolivan took his weight, helped him move faster, harder against Antok, and after that everything rapidly got very nearly too much. Too much of Kolivan, too calm and tender and Keith could barely comprehend it right now, let alone deal with it, and he just wanted to hide; and too much of Antok, in him and around him and making everything feel so much in ways Keith didn't have the energy to handle but couldn't bear the thought of stopping. When he came he was sobbing, a broken mess in his alphas’ embrace, and when Antok finally knotted it was a huge and inexpressible relief.
Keith immediately passed out.
He came to a minute or so later, still feeling bloated with his own slick and the semen of five alphas, plus Antok's enormous cock and knot. As he lay there, exhausted, on Antok’s chest, he realised that his vision was returning to normal and he was no longer seeing things in the super-contrasted, body-fluids-seeking night-vision of his heat. In the dimmed light of the bedroom, the bed looked almost passably clean instead of neon with sweat and semen, and Antok…
Keith looked up at Antok. He was smiling sleepily down at him, face now much more normal in shades of amethyst and mauve, his hair slightly more greyish than it had looked in heat but still noticeably pale purple. He still had a scar across one side of his face, but he was still, in Keith’s opinion, gorgeous. The smile - lopsided and a little uncertain still - widened a bit. ‘Hello, Keith. Heat broken?’
‘Uh. I guess?’ said Keith, then stopped, wondering at the hoarseness of his own voice. He dismissed it immediately - he had probably done a lot of shouting. ‘Where’s Kolivan?’
He was answered immediately by a squeeze around the waist and a water pouch poked into his peripheral, but no verbal reply. Antok chuckled softly as Keith took the water pouch. ‘I think you wore him out a little.’
‘Hm.’ There was silence for a while, Keith lying in Antok’s arms and sucking on his water pouch, but when it was empty he said, ‘What happens now?’
‘Usually you and all of your alphas sleep in a pile until everyone is rested, so you know you’re safe. Is that something you want? Should I call the others?’
‘In a minute.’ Keith hesitated, then he said, ‘Antok, I… feel like you guys let me into something back there.’
‘You’re our omega,’ said Kolivan sleepily from behind him. ‘You were on heat.’
‘No I mean… you two. I know I was out of my mind on hormones but it still felt… different.’
Kolivan just grunted. Antok stroked his hair and said, after some thought, ‘We can’t be omegas for each other. But you are our omega. Remember I told you I didn’t have sex with anyone but Kolivan or you?’
‘Oh.’ Keith blinked, still not quite comprehending. ‘Then you’re OK with being in bed with Thace and Ulaz and Regris?’
‘They know not to get grabby.’
Keith nodded. ‘Okay. You better call them in, then.’
Antok nodded and dropped a kiss on Keith's head. ‘Kolivan, will you? I should change the bed.’
‘No,’ grunted Kolivan. ‘You do it. I'm dead. This pool of bodily fluids is too comfortable.’
Startled, Keith let out a cough of laughter - he hadn't thought Kolivan was capable of laziness, let alone petulance - and Antok leaned over as far as he could. There was the sound of a smack, not very hard, and an indignant snort.
‘You can sleep in a few minutes’ time,’ said Antok. ‘Now stand up and summon the others while I deal with the bed.’
Kolivan sighed the sigh of the extremely heavily put-upon. ‘Yes, alright, I'm up, alpha.’
Keith realised he was gaping when Kolivan rolled over into his field of vision, reached over to put a finger under his chin and closed his mouth. Then he stretched and yawned - a crackle of ill-used muscles and an impressive display of fangs - and got to his feet. Antok rose too, with less leonine grace considering he was still cradling Keith against him like a baby, but he only pulled the lever to freshen the bed before tucking himself and Keith back in it. Kolivan, having sent a message to the others that they should return, climbed back in the bed in the crook of Antok’s arm and almost instantly fell asleep.
‘Look at that,’ murmured Antok. ‘What a disgrace. Oh, here we go. Are you ready?’
‘Ready? For-’ The question was bitten off with a harsh intake of air and he was glad for Ulaz's cool, steady hands on his back as Antok attempted to pull out, the knot gone. ‘Fuck, it’s too much, I can't-’
All five of them were here now, Kolivan awake in an instant, Thace scenting Keith and kissing his scent gland, but still every move Antok tried to make made Keith tense up even more.
‘Wait,’ said Ulaz. ‘It's not as though we're short on time.’ He stroked his hand slowly up and down Keith's back, and gradually Keith’s breaths calmed a little.
‘Ulaz?’
‘Yes, Keith?’
‘Is this… normal?’
The room was instantly filled with assurances of exactly how normal this was, how it was practically expected for an omega to be oversensitized and raw at the end of their heat, how this kind of thing happened all the time and a good alpha should help their omega cope.
At which point, Ulaz slapped his forehead and headed over to the stuff generator. ‘I'm a dummy,’ he said, returning with a pump bottle of clear green gel. ‘I'm sorry, Keith, I should have thought of this before.’
Keith tensed, of course, not ready to be touched, but Ulaz’s hands were infinitely gentle and the gel, which he had expected to be unpleasantly cold, was blissfully cool against his burning rim. He sighed, shut his eyes and felt the ache start to leave his body.
‘It has a mild-to-moderate numbing agent as well as being both cooling and a lubricant,’ said Ulaz. ‘When you feel ready to try again..?’
‘I. I. OK, yeah.’
Gradually, gradually, with much stopping and starting, much gasping and clenching of teeth from both Antok and Keith, and scenting, kisses and reassurances of how well Keith was doing coming from all sides, Antok slid free. With his now-flaccid cock came a spill of fluid that made Thace swear under his breath before Ulaz was there with a soft, cool cloth cleaning it up, and then Keith realised that the man whose arms he’d been rolled into smelled of salt and soap and freshness, and he looked up into a sleepy, jagged-pupilled smile.
‘Hey,’ said Regris softly. ‘How do you feel?’
‘Hey.’ Keith managed a weak smile. ‘Sore. Tired. Been this exhausted before but I didn’t know it was possible to do it and feel incredible too.’ Regris let out a little huff of laughter. ‘What about you? Are you OK now?’
‘I’m fine. Don’t you worry about me.’ Regris dropped a kiss on Keith’s forehead. ‘Get some sleep, you can clean up and get things sorted out tomorrow.’
Keith nodded, yawned, and drifted off to sleep, with the sounds of his alphas sleeping around him.
Notes:
Happy end of the year, everyone, whatever your denomination or hemisphere. I hope you have nice people to celebrate with; if not, I hope this helps distract you from that at least a little.
We are done with the extended sex scenes at least for a little while! But not for good, you know I know what you want here. Also I know it looks like Keith's having a bad time with Antok here, that's mainly because he's overloaded, oversensitized and coming to the end of his heat. It's not Antok's fault.
Incidentally, 'kad'v' means 'omega' here, so 'Lok kad'v' just means 'precious omega'. I would put up a vocab/worldbuilding document for this story but since it would be changing and being added to constantly I have absolutely no idea where.
Chapter 13: Awakening
Summary:
In which Keith wakes, remembers a bad time, and discusses a contentious issue with Regris - and also finds out what the big deal with the biting was.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
When Keith woke, he had no idea what time it was. It was dark, but the fact that his roof could be totally blacked out, combined with his shaky at best grasp of the orbits of Daibazaal and its moons, meant that time was a pretty nebulous concept. What he did know was that he was sore, a bone-deep, leaden ache like he’d only ever experienced after someone had been trying their level best to kill him.
He turned his head and buried his nose in the thick fur of the throat beside him, which immediately started to vibrate, almost too quietly to be called a purr. Around him, huge warm bodies begin to stir, although not very far.
‘He wakes?’ asked Antok sleepily.
‘It seems so,’ said Thace, combing a hand through Keith's hair. Keith was horribly aware of how tangled and sticky it was. ‘Hello, my treasure. How are you?’
‘Hfngh,’ said Keith. This eloquence summoned a fond laugh from everyone around him, so he snuggled further into Thace's shoulder. ‘’M fuckin’ filthy.’
‘Mm,’ said Thace, sounding no less than pleased. ‘That's what the hot tub is for, after all.’
The prospect sounded heavenly, and Keith made an attempt to move, but… ‘I don't think I can walk.’
‘Don't try and move,’ said Ulaz. ‘Anyone would think you wanted to strain something.’
‘You know what he’s like,’ said Kolivan fondly. ‘Always something to prove. No, Keith, today you will let us take care of you.’
A flush of warmth, sweet and pleasant and utterly unlike the all-consuming burn of the heat, bloomed in Keith's heart. ‘Uh, sure,’ he said. ‘Is it… OK if I have twenty minutes with Thace though? No offence, I just… need to ask some questions.’
Maybe Keith should have expected the surprised faces by now, but he was still just as shocked as they all looked.
‘OK?’ said Antok carefully. ‘Keith - do you think we'd be… jealous?’
‘He does come from a largely monogamous culture,’ pointed out Ulaz reasonably. ‘In fact he's been showing far fewer signs of culture shock than I thought. I suppose I was a touch optimistic.’
‘We’re your circle,’ said Regris. ‘Why would we be jealous of someone else in the circle? That isn't how it works.’
Keith let out a held breath and smiled. ‘Right. Thanks, guys.’
‘Bathtime, then?’ said Thace.
‘Oh god you bet. I am sticky and full of questions.’
Everyone laughed, and allowed Thace to extricate himself from the pile of bodies, pick Keith up princess-style and carry him off to the bathroom. Once there, he put him down on the bench, kissed him and got them both robes while he set the hot tub filling and headed out to the kitchen - at least, that seemed to be the idea. He stopped short at the door.
‘Ulaz!’
‘You forgot this. Don't leave him, call us when you need us if twenty minutes turns out not to be enough.’
‘I. Thankyou.’
There was no reply, but Thace turned back fielding a hovering tray, which he left by the tub. He tested the water, nodded and turned to Keith. ‘Come, then, my darling, let's get you clean.’
‘I have come more than enough tonight,’ said Keith as Thace helped him into the water, supported on his broad violet chest. Thace's laughter shook both of them, and then he brought the tray to float over the water so he could reach its contents.
Keith wrapped his hands around the mug of olfracta immediately - it would be too hot to drink for a little while, but it was comforting to hold. Then he realised Thace was squinting at a large glass jar and said, ‘What's that?’
Thace smiled. ‘Oh, I thought you'd know this better than I, it's an Earth thing. Your mother loves it, it's called…’ He frowned at the bottle again. ‘Bath salts. Sodium chloride, magnesium, sulphur, plus a number of other natural chemical agents and some additives that Krolia says are mostly to suppress the smell.’
‘Oh! Yeah, I know about those, Lance swears by them,’ said Keith, as Thace scattered a liberal dose in the bath. They foamed a little, then turned the water pale green. ‘I've… never seen them do that before.’
‘These have a special herbal additive to promote healing, especially in galra,’ said Thace. He waved the tray closer to Keith - there was a plate piled high with intriguing little foodstuffs, and a selection of bottles and jars. Keith took a little pink cake that tasted of plums and sipped his drink. ‘So,’ said Thace. ‘Your first heat with us here. How did we do?’
‘Honestly, Thace? You're really asking me that?’ said Keith. ‘All of you were amazing, I've never felt like that in my life. I didn't know it could be like that. Actually I was gonna ask you the same question.’
Thace scented him, and he shut his eyes and relaxed back - he would have spilled his drink, but Thace was steadying his hand before it trembled. ‘There is nothing wrong you could have done. But you were the best any alpha could wish for - better, even. Perfection.’
‘No,’ said Keith softly, and Thace kissed his scent gland.
‘You don't think so? Ah, well, perhaps we will have you seeing it someday. Now, you had questions?’
Keith raised his head enough to drink, then leaned back against Thace's shoulder. ‘Why did Regris do that? And why won't anyone tell me about it? I want a real answer, no trying to wriggle out of it.’
‘Wriggle out… Keith, the only reason we didn't tell you at the time was because you were in heat, we didn't think you wanted conversation.’
He had a point. Still… ‘Well, I'm listening now. Why did he try and bite me? And why not let him? You let me bite you all the time.’
‘For one thing, Regris is capable of breaking the spine of a Deriban kattafuurl in one bite, although he would not have done that to you. You have blunt teeth and a weak jaw and can't break the skin of anyone here.’
Keith was about to protest, but it was obviously true, so he sipped grumpily at his drink and stayed quiet.
‘Regris was trying to give you a bond bite. A permanent scar to your scent gland that would have proclaimed to alphas everywhere that you were taken, as it were. He… likely wasn't thinking straight; heat does things to both alphas and omegas, but you'll have to ask him.’ Thace hesitated, then added, ‘If you no longer feel safe alone with Regris I could come with you.’
‘No, we're fine,’ mumbled Keith. ‘Thanks, though, I appreciate it. So it doesn't form some kind of mental bond or obligation?’
‘Only in the old stories.’
‘And… What does it have to do with the primary thing?’ Keith drained his mug and put it back on the tray.
‘Only the most tenuous connection,’ replied Thace. ‘People who aren't in circles bond all the time, and your primary can be platonic or familial but your bond mate… No.’
‘Huh.’ Keith thought about it, and decided he'd think better later. ‘Wash my hair for me?’
Thace smiled. ‘Gladly. Should I call the others too?’
‘Yeah. Yeah, that'd be nice.’
Keith was getting his hair liberally soaped as the others filed in, so he couldn't do much more than smile and wave at their greetings, although he was a little surprised to see that Antok was still unmasked. Apparently, he wasn't the only one.
‘Keith, doesn't Antok look amazing?’ asked Regris as he settled in beside him. ‘And I never knew…’
‘I would thank you to drop the subject, or I will put the mask back on,’ said Antok stiffly.
‘Yes, sir,’ said Regris immediately, shoulders hunching and - Keith could have sworn - his hair and ears flattening against his head. He felt through the water till he found a scaly hand, and gave it a squeeze. Regris stared at him for a moment, then returned his smile. They were going to have to talk, but it could wait for now.
The morning - and it turned out that it was morning, just - continued in luxurious laziness. Keith attempted, just once, to help with the food preparation but the look of wounded confusion on Thace's face told him all he needed to know. It was the day after his heat, this alphas wanted to coddle him and he had to put up with it.
He had to admit, after being tucked up in bed and given one of Ulaz's very best massages, that there were benefits. He just hoped it wasn't going to be a permanent thing.
Kolivan, dressed now in soft pants and loose long-sleeved top, sat down on the bed beside him. 'Is something wrong, Kit?' he asked. 'You look remarkably sour.'
'Mmh.' Keith wiped his hands down his face and sighed. However grumpy he felt, he owed Kolivan an answer. 'No, I'm fine. Really. I just… I'm not used to having so many people - or anyone - constantly dancing attendance on me. I'm not helpless.'
Kolivan nodded. 'I can see how that would clash with your personality. Well, I am leaving now, I have duties I must fulfil. Your mother has been leading admirably in my absence but I am needed. Would you like Antok to stay?'
Keith though about it. 'Yeah. Yeah, if you can spare him?'
Kolivan chuckled, and reached out to brush a lock of hair away from Keith's eyes. 'I don't own him, Keith. And I would say you are a decidedly special case, and this a special time.'
'OK.' Keith sat up a bit more. 'Kiss me. Oh, and tell Mom I'm doing great, and can she send Kosmo in? I bet he's going nuts.'
Kolivan laughed, cupped Keith's face in his hands and kissed him tenderly. 'I will tell her. When shall I say she can see you?'
'I'll call her myself when I'm ready. Bye, Kol.'
'Goodbye, Keith.' And Kolivan was gone.
It seemed he had relayed Keith's concerns to the others, because very soon the apartment was quiet, the only sound being his own breathing. He sat up in bed. ‘Antok?’
‘I'm here,’ came Antok's voice from the main room, and there he was, leaning on the doorway in a soft green sweater and dark grey sweatpants, his feet bare. ‘You look strange, are you feeling alright?’
‘Fine,’ said Keith. ‘Just wondering if you dress like that for Kolivan.’
Antok smiled, an odd quirk of a thing pulling up on his good side. ‘Kolivan has different turn-ons than you. I'm glad I got lucky with yours, though.’
Keith was about to reply, but he was interrupted by the pop of displaced air, and suddenly Kosmo was on the bed, sniffing him anxiously.
‘Kosmo! Hi, boy, good to see you, how're you doing?’
Kosmo kept sniffing, then turned around, sniffed the air and growled at Antok. Both men's brows shot up.
‘I… should go,’ said Antok.
‘No, he's just never been around anyone I would happily call my alpha before.’ Keith caught hold of Kosmo's mane and said firmly into his face, ‘Kosmo. That's Antok, you know Antok. I have alphas now, he's one of them, he took such good care of me, now be a good boy and be nice to him.’ Then he let go of Kosmo, went very deliberately over to Antok, and kissed him. Kosmo whined, padded over and sniffed them both, and whined again.
‘Probably he smells the others too,’ rumbled Antok, holding Keith tight.
‘Then we'll have to go through this four more times over the next day or so,’ replied Keith. ‘In the meantime come to bed, I need a nap.’
Sleeping was always easier when cupped in Antok's massive arm and with Kosmo huddled up against his back. He might have thought it would even stop him dreaming. No such luck, and sleep brought memories of beloved silver eyes glinting deep within with a cruel purple light; a fight he knew he couldn’t win because he couldn’t kill Shiro and Shiro was trying his level best to kill him; the burn in his cheek and then, worst of all, realising that they were both going to die and this time, he couldn’t close his eyes so he had to watch…
Keith sat up, gasping and snatching at the air in front of him, but the blinding light was gone, the clone facility was gone, the ache in his arms from hanging from his sword and holding Shiro up - well, his arms did ache, a little, but not the bone-deep burn he remembered, and in different places too. He rubbed his scar, almost surprised to find it painless and completely healed - and damp. Oh, and he was crying too.
He jumped violently in response to a wide hand on the small of his back, and Kosmo’s head on his lap, but then the last of his disorientation dropped away and he realised where he was and who he was with.
‘Bad dreams?’ said Antok softly.
Keith nodded, then turned and rested his head on the broad and infinitely comforting shoulder. ‘More like a memory,’ he whispered, as the other hand came up and carded through his hair. ‘I… don’t think I ever told any of you guys what happened to Shiro on the way back. How much do you know?’
‘We knew that his original body was killed and his soul preserved in the Black Lion, and then later transplanted by Allura into a galra-made clone. And that that clone was spying on you for some time first.’
‘Right. So I tracked it to this moon where there were so many clones, I-’ Keith choked and hid his face in Antok’s throat for a moment. ‘All these lifeless Shiros in bottles, what was she gonna do with them all? And then there was… well, I’d been thinking of him as Shiro, but he was looking at me and he looked… vicious. He… he said n...neither of us would leave, and he looked so cruel, I should have known, but I wanted so much for him to be alive…'
Keith was sobbing openly now, curled up in Antok’s arms, and Antok was scenting him and stroking his back, letting him get everything out. ‘And so there was a fight? Is that how you got that scar?’
Keith nodded and sniffed. Antok handed him a tissue and he blew his nose hard. ‘I was always a bit weaker than Shiro but this time I really couldn’t win because I didn’t wanna hurt him and he. He. He.’
‘It’s alright. You needn’t say it.’
Another sniff. ‘And I told him. I’m so stupid! It was the first time I ever told anyone I loved them. And for a moment it made him stop, I thought I’d got through to him, and then it just made him angrier. But it gave me the opening I needed to chop off his arm and break the control. And then the place really started breaking apart and…’ Keith trailed off.
Antok smoothed his hair and kissed him on the forehead. ‘No, it’s fine, there’s no need to tell me. Krolia told us how you were found. No wonder this recurs in your dreams, and it’s common to get vivid dreams after heats and ruts.’
‘Well, good to know it’s normal,’ grumbled Keith.
‘At least something about you is,’ said Antok with a smile. He glanced at Kosmo, who butted Keith’s elbow and whined. ‘See, he’s worried about you.’
‘Yeah, I know, everyone’s worried about me these days,’ said Keith, wiping his eyes with the heels of his hands. ‘I bet if I get pregnant that’ll get even worse.’
‘But we all love you so much. We want to keep you safe and happy.’
Keith went still, and said nothing for a minute, then finally said, ‘Antok… You know Regris said he loved me yesterday? And he tried to do a mating bite?’
Antok’s good brow went up. ‘I did think something along those lines, yes. I saw him with the muzzle when I came in.’
‘I told you about what happened with… well, I guess not Shiro really, except it was Shiro to me, so yes Shiro. That’s the only person except my mom or my dad who I ever said I loved them. And they immediately tried to kill me. I don’t know what to do with this.’
‘I think it’s going to be different for everyone, Lok Kad’v. Please don’t feel any pressure on you to love just because we love you. We’re happy you’re our Commandant.’
Keith made a doubtful noise, but didn’t try and debate it further. Instead he said, ‘I’m gonna try and sleep some more.’
Antok nodded, lay down and offered his arm - Keith lay down in the crook of it and closed his eyes. It took a while, listening to Antok’s deep, sonorous breathing and Kosmo’s doggy snores, but eventually Keith’s mind slowed down and he fell asleep.
He thought he'd be more frustrated with the level of care that the circle insisted on lavishing him with over the next few days but even after a spell in the healing pod he was so deeply tired he could do nothing but drowze in his bed, watching his alphas tend to him between long bouts of sleep.
On the afternoon of day… four? Five? Keith sat up realizing he had no idea how much time had passed, or who was with him. Well, both those were easily solved, since he knew his alphas wouldn't leave him alone till he was capable again.
‘Thace? Kolivan?’ he called, raising his voice slightly.
‘Close. No vape,’ said Krolia, appearing smiling in the doorway. ‘Hello darling, how do you feel? You look a lot brighter.’
‘Uh, yeah, I feel way better. I think I'm done sleeping for now.’
‘That's good. Are you hungry?’
‘Not right now, I just… Mom, how long since my heat? I think I've lost a day or so.’
Krolia came in and sat down on the bed, and Kosmo put his head in her lap. ‘That's incredibly common, dear. Your heat was a bit over five days ago.’
Keith thought about it, petting Kosmo as he did. ‘Has Regris been in while I was sleeping? I don't remember seeing him…’
‘He has, yes, once,’ said Krolia slowly. ‘He said he wanted to apologise and then he saw you were asleep and left, but he hasn't been back since.’
Keith narrowed his eyes. ‘Right. Well then, I'm getting up. I need to go talk to him, he's avoiding me.’
‘Keith you need to have a scan-’
‘Later. Not yet.’
‘Darling, I know it's hard but avoiding the subject won't make it any easier.’
Keith got out of bed on legs a little more wobbly than were dignified, and when he'd found his footing and a robe, turned to his mother. ‘I'm not avoiding anything. I'm just waiting a week, then I'll have Ulaz do it. OK, now what I need before anything else is a shower.’
He got himself a fresh uniform and headed to the bathroom, and Krolia didn't try to stop him.
Keith had never been to Regris’s room but he knew the way, and he was surprised to find the door open. Inside it was mostly dark. The room was lit by a dim greenish light filtering through a fishtank that took up the entirety of one wall but didn’t seem to have any fish in it, and Keith could see the other wall had a bank of computer screens - all ticking and humming in various degrees of digital sleep. Most of the furniture seemed to be hanging chairs of various sizes, and in the half-light they loomed ominously, making Keith almost wonder why he was here.
No. He knew why. He knocked on the door frame. ‘Hey, Cthulhu? You in here?’
There was a sloshing sound and the light in the fishtank rippled, then something Keith had thought was a rock uncurled and Regris swam up and looked over the top. ‘What did you just call me?’
Keith shrugged. ‘Cthulhu. Earth horror movie reference, I think? I'm not sure, the tentacly old god is a pretty old trope and the only movie I actually saw was this porn movie called Cthulhu and Me, and I only saw about ten minutes of that because the special effects were so bad they ruined everything - anyway. I'm not here to talk about that. Are you busy?’
Regris blinked. ‘No, I'm not busy. Come in, have a seat, turn up the lights. I'll get up properly and get us a drink.’
Keith found the light control pretty easily - the Marmora base rooms were laid out with a certain homogeneity - and soon discovered that even when brightened, Regris's room still looked like it was lit with sunlight filtered through water. It was nice, Keith decided. Relaxing. The chairs were also relaxing, once he could see them clearly and enjoy them in their blanketed, cushiony reality. Keith picked one, slung the blanket around his shoulders and said, ‘I like your room, can I come hang out here more often?’
Regris, who was halfway through putting on his uniform, stared at him. ‘What? I mean, yes! Obviously! If you want!’
‘You think I wouldn't want to?’ said Keith. Regris drooped, not meeting his gaze. So Keith hopped out of the chair and crossed the room to him, drawing him down to scent him, regardless of how wet his hair was. ‘Regris. There's a ton of stuff that went down while I was in heat that we do have to talk about. But what's important is that you're still my alpha and my best friend. Of course I wanna hang out with you.’
‘I don't see why,’ said Regris. ‘I betrayed your trust.’
‘OK, why don't we start with that.’ Keith steered Regris to the biggest swing chair he could see and curled up with him on it, catching his tail and arranging it around his own waist. Eventually Regris got the picture and started hugging him of his own accord, looking frankly astonished as he did so. ‘You tried to bite me, that's a thing. Thace told me why it’s a big deal, that’s a thing too.’
‘I tried to force a bond on you.’ Regris looked down, unable to look Keith in the face. ‘I'm so sorry.’
‘It's OK,’ said Keith. ‘I forgive you.’
‘You shouldn't!’ snapped Regris, whipping round to face him and setting the chair rocking. ‘It's one of the worst things I could have done as your alpha!’
‘Good thing Thace and Ulaz stopped you, then,’ replied Keith unconcernedly. ‘I mean, are you going to do it again?’
There was silence for a moment. ‘I don't know. I still love you.’
Keith thought about this for a bit, then climbed into Regris's lap where he couldn't escape his gaze. ‘OK, Regris, if you said this where Kolivan could hear you, do you know how many extra training sets he'd give you? We are Blades of Marmora. You are stronger than this. I have faith in you, I know how well you were trained, back there was just a temporary lapse. Now, will it happen again?’
Regris, spellbound, shook his head. ‘No. You're right, I can control myself.’
Keith nodded. ‘Good.’ Then he sighed and kissed Regris, who lifted his face into it like a swimmer coming up for air. ‘As for the love thing… Regris, I don't know what to do about that. I don't even know how I feel. I've never had anyone say that to me before I came here.’
‘That's fine,’ said Regris, combing a hand through his hair. ‘Take your time. It doesn't make that much of a difference; after all, it's been a while for me already.’
Keith sighed. ‘No, you don’t understand. The last time I told someone I loved him he tried to kill me.’
‘Yeah,’ said Regris softly. ‘I know. Antok told me about that.’
‘He did?’ Keith looked up, not knowing whether to be relieved or indignant.
‘Yeah. He said he didn’t know whether he should talk about it but that he thought it would be better if I knew. So… it’s OK, don’t worry, take your time. If you want me not to say it I won’t. I don’t want it to be your problem.’
‘I… look, you can say the L word if you want to. I don’t want you bottling shit up more than you already gotta.’
Regris laughed and kissed the messy hair away from Keith’s brow. ‘Like you, you mean? I’m not bottling anything, aglorruh.’
Keith’s eyes narrowed. ‘Oh yeah? “Little star in the water”, was it? If you’re not bottling shit up, why do you keep calling me something unattainable? In case you hadn’t noticed, I am right here in your arms.’
‘If you were llebalorill then I’d be your primary and you’d have my bite on your neck.’
Something in Regris’s tone made Keith hesitate, and he rubbed the back of his neck as he spoke. ‘What’s that mean? “Shiny fish”?’
Regris snorted. ‘No. Aardru aren’t that romantic, all told. Llebalorill means “my catch”. My catch, my prize, mine. No need to look that startled, we both know you’re not.’
‘Er.’ Keith stared at him, a little wide-eyed. ‘It’s… a thought.’
‘If you want to leave now I understand.’
Keith rolled his eyes and kissed him. ‘Cut the crap- I mean, enough with the feeling sorry for yourself, Regris. Let’s get one thing straight. You’re my alpha. You’re important. Next time you start feeling doubts about you and me, come talk to me about it, OK? Don’t just assume I don’t want to see you. Promise?’
‘I can promise that, certainly,’ said Regris, and kissed him again.
It took a while before they surfaced, but eventually Keith raised his head and said, ‘Right, I’ve been hiding in my room for more than a week, shall we go show the cadets we’re still alive?’
‘I’m sure they’ll be delighted to see you. Let’s go.’
Notes:
Happy new decade! This one actually came out sooner than expected, given the number of distractions on my time - I have an OC fic to write for a friend's christmas gift, and I got a Switch for christmas and I'm starting up my fashion doll Tumblog again, besides the whole CHRISTMAS rigmarole - but here it is!
How was your Winterval? Mine was pretty good, but as always I'm glad it's over. Incidentally if anyone wants my Switch code so we can meet up in Pokemon then let me know. Nintendo's internet finction is pretty crappy but OH WELL.
Chapter 14: Potential
Summary:
In which the results of Keith's posts-heat scan are revealed, the progress of the teleduv project is noted, and he eats an alien fruit.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
On the seventh day after the heat, Keith dressed in his uniform and made his way to the medibay. Ulaz knew he was coming, of course, still he was surprised at how quiet it was - just himself and Ulaz, not even any auxiliary medics. The door to the healing pod room was open and Keith found himself staring at the row of purplish glass cylinders, a sudden lump in his throat. Not that he really expected them to light up and to see four identical, comatose Shiros, but…
Ulaz closed the door, and Keith blinked and looked round. ‘I'm fine,’ he said, a little prematurely.
‘I'm very glad to hear that,’ said Ulaz, earning Keith's eternal gratitude. ‘How do you feel other than that? You're here for your post-heat physical, correct?’
‘Yeah. Uh, I feel good. Pretty good, yeah. Do galra get morning sickness?'
Ulaz raised an eyebrow, just a fraction. 'Not as such. We're less inclined to eject much-needed nutrients than humans are, it seems. Have you been vomiting or feeling nauseous at all?’
‘No. If I was I’d tell you.’
That produced a smile. ‘Glad to hear it. Now, will you please undress and get up on the bench?'
Keith obeyed, and Ulaz ran careful hands over his body, checking every healing bite and bruise, testing carefully for tender points and strained muscles. After a moment, Keith let himself relax under Ulaz’s touch.
‘Have you been having any internal pain since your heat?’ asked Ulaz. ‘Part your legs, please.’
‘Depends what you call pain, really,’ said Keith. ‘I mean, it’s been a little bit achy? But nothing unusual.’ Keith had been wondering how intimate the examination would turn, but Ulaz merely waved some kind of scanner between his thighs and nodded slightly when it made a faint bip sound.
‘No bleeding, cramping or stabbing pains?’
‘Nothing like that. Honestly, with the amount of sex I had that night I’m amazed I wasn’t more sore. I mean, I think I might have pulled a muscle in my thigh a bit? But that’s probably from trying to get my legs round Antok’s waist.’
That got a twitch of a smile and a huff of laughter. ‘Yes, well, that’s why I gave you the muscle rub,’ said Ulaz. ‘Possibly you should start doing stretches before you attempt that sort of thing in future. Anyway, did you actually run any kind of scan yourself?’
‘Well, I… No.’
Ulaz looked as though he was considering starting a lecture, but instead he just said, ‘Well, under the circumstances that's understandable, but please in future, run the scan. You seem to be perfectly healthy, but if you had an adverse reaction of any kind you might not know till it was too late.’
‘Right,’ mumbled Keith, shades of the sullen teenager from the Garrison creeping back into his voice.
‘Anything wrong?’ said Ulaz. ‘You sound… offended.’
‘No, I just…’ Keith groaned and rolled his eyes theatrically. ‘I know you have to do this professional boundaries crap, you’re not the first person to give me that lecture, I get it. I realise you’re not actually mad at me. I’m just... ‘
Ulaz waited a few seconds. ‘You’re just..?’ he prompted gently.
‘I’m just really bad at being told what I ought to be doing, people who measure up and are healthy don’t do that or do do that, or whatever, everyone’s so disappointed in you, Keith. Yeah.’ He turned his face away, trying to hide in his hair - it was easier of late, since his hair was getting long enough to tie back but still inevitably managed to gradually escape its bonds during the day.
‘Nobody here is disappointed in you,’ replied Ulaz. ‘And I apologize if it sounded as if I was scolding or lecturing you. I merely meant to offer information and advice.’
Keith looked up sharply. ‘Oh, sure, nobody has ever said that before.’
There was a pause that only got more more awkward the longer it went on, and then Ulaz's eyes narrowed. ‘Alright. I can see we are are at something of an impasse. Keith, you are here for a scan, not a drill. I am your medic and your alpha, not your superior.’
‘But you do outrank me.’
‘That's debatable, and only in that I've been here longer. This situation concerns your body and your children and therefore not even Kolivan outranks you.’
Keith hesitated, chewing this over, and he hadn't even realised he was cold until Ulaz draped a blanket around him and that, oddly, put the finger on what was worrying him. ‘Alpha?’
‘Yes?’ said Ulaz immediately.
‘So… You're still my alpha, even when you're on duty?’
Ulaz smiled and squeezed his hand. ‘If I couldn't do that I would never have joined your circle. Is everything alright?’
‘No, really, it’s fine,’ said Keith. ‘I’m just, uh… yeah. Uh.’
‘We should move on. Are you ready for your scan?’
Keith took a deep breath in and out. ‘Ready as I'll ever be. Ulaz, if it turns out I failed, you’ll…’
‘“Failed” is not the term I would use, but of course I'll be here for you in any capacity you need, yes,’ said Ulaz, and Keith let himself relax. Ulaz produced a tool like a smooth white ping-pong paddle from a drawer, and waved it over Keith's abdomen. Immediately it hummed and lit up in shades of indigo, blue and orange, much to Keith's unease, and then Ulaz looked up and smiled.
‘You may dress now, the examination is over, all is well and it would appear, as long as everything continues to stay the same, that you have twins.’
‘Twins!’ Keith stared at Ulaz, startled. ‘What do you mean, “as long as everything stays the same”?’
‘Well.’ Ulaz pressed a button on the paddle and a hologram was projected into the air so that Keith could see the scan of his own abdomen, and the miniscule dabs of light that were nowhere near recognisable as people but still were alive, full of possibility. Keith’s eyes went wide and he almost forgot to listen to what Ulaz was saying. ‘This early on it is fairly common for one twin to absorb the other in the womb - or there is a far more distant possibility that one could split and you could end up with triplets or, if we consider the vanishingly long odds of both gametes splitting, quadruplets. That’s if they all survived to term, of course. But for now, and unless anything like that changes? Twins.’
‘That’s… that’s incredible,’ said Keith, putting a hand on his stomach. ‘Can we tell if they’re boys or girls?’
‘Not yet,’ said Ulaz. ‘But we can tell accurately who the other parents are. If that’s a thing you would wish to know.’
‘Are you kidding? Of course I want to know!’
Ulaz smiled and tapped a few points on the paddle, and one little blot of life showed up glowing slightly green and the other in orange. Keith looked up in alarm. ‘Oh, fuck, are they OK?’
‘They’re fine, Keith,’ said Ulaz softly. ‘That’s just so I can easily point out which is which. And this one’s alpha,’ he pointed at the green one, ‘was Thace. A fact that I think will be a source of immense pride to him when you tell him. You like that thought?’
Keith, who was watching the little green dot and chewing his knuckle as he imagined what the infant product of himself and Thace might look like, nodded. ‘I… yeah. Thace is gonna make such a good dad. What about the other one?’
Ulaz said nothing, and Keith looked up after a minute. He was standing, looking at the screen, and every few seconds he would open his mouth, deem whatever he was about to say unworthy, and shut it again. A slow smile spread across Keith’s face. ‘Yours?’
Ulaz nodded. ‘I hope I can be the parent your children deserve.’
‘Ulaz. Just for once, fuck the professional crap. Come here and hold me, alpha. I want to scent you.’ Ulaz looked up in surprise and his mouth opened and closed a couple of times, but his resolve crumpled. He went to Keith - who still hadn't dressed - and held him tight, Keith sitting with his arms around Ulaz’s neck as he breathed him in. The first time he’d scented Ulaz he hadn’t smelled much other than disinfectant, metal, and then a little later on, the heavy smell of sex. Now, though, he was learning to pick up nuances, and under the powerful smell of his job, Ulaz smelled clean and fresh like air into a long-closed room, and a little like the paper of a new book. ‘You’ll be great,’ Keith murmured. ‘Our child will be amazing. You’ll see.’
‘Our child…’ Ulaz buried his face in Keith’s hair, blinking hard.
‘Were you thinking of this as just my child?’
‘I admit I was, yes.’
‘Well, don’t. Our child. Probably going to have a fluffy black tuft of hair on top and everything, they’ll be so cute. And if they’re anything like you dangerously intelligent so we’ll have to watch out for that.’
Ulaz laughed a little breathlessly. ‘Honestly this was not what I thought this would be like. You are a deadly enemy to professional distance, gezg tra.’
‘Damn right I am. Now kiss me, and then I have to go tell Thace.’
Ulaz took Keith's face between his hands and kissed him as though he'd never see him again in his life, then Keith reluctantly released him, dressed, and scented him again before leaving to find Thace...
Before that, though, he went to tell Kosmo the good news - it was a good thing there was nobody there but Krolia and the wolf or the entire game would have been given away, because the instant Keith stepped in, Kosmo sat up, focussed on Keith, ears pointed forward, tail wagging furiously.
‘Kosmo! What’s wrong?’ said Krolia, who had only just saved her mug from being knocked off the table into her lap. ‘Keith? Is that you?’
‘Yes, Mom,’ called Keith from the bedroom, ‘everything’s fine, I’ll be right in, just gotta get a couple of things!’
‘Right, I- HEY! You stay right here, you!’ Krolia grabbed a handful of Kosmo’s ruff to stop him rushing into the bedroom but he vanished with a pop and a tang of ozone, reappearing in the bedroom to an indignant screech from Keith.
‘KOSMO! Down, boy! No, I- what the fuck..?’
Krolia went into the bedroom and found Keith standing by the matter generator with a box in each hand, gaping at Kosmo, who was carefully but thoroughly sniffing his stomach. He looked up at Krolia, back at Kosmo, and said, ‘Buh?’
Krolia blinked. Then a delighted smile spread across her face. ‘You went to get scanned today, didn’t you?’
‘Well, yeah, but…’ Keith’s face went blank. ‘Of course he knows, he’s a giant teleporting space wolf. How could he not know? Here you go, Mom.’ He tossed one of the boxes to Krolia and used the free hand to pet Kosmo, who was still sniffing him and curling around him protectively. ‘Fuck, I don’t think he’s going to let me out of my sight. And I wanted to tell Thace by myself.’
‘It’s Thace’s? Congratulations! Oh, wow, that’s going to be such a beautiful baby.’
‘Two babies. Twins,’ replied Keith. ‘One’s Thace’s, the other is Ulaz’s. Brains and beauty, and I get to supply the chaos, so we’re all doomed.’
By now, Krolia had unwrapped her new mug, which was pink, and had WORLD’S BEST GRANDMA written on it in gold cursive that she squinted at for some time before working out what it said. ‘Oh! Keith, thankyou, it’s lovely! And that sounds like the perfect combination for a Blade of Marmora, if you ask me.’
‘Yeah, speaking of asking you, there was one thing I wanted to talk to you about. If there’s a boy or two boys, how would you feel if I called one of them Yorak?’
Krolia’s face crumpled a little. ‘Keith… It was your grandfather’s name, it’s a traditional name in my family, I always felt a little regretful that I couldn’t give it to you - you’re making me so proud, my son.’ She came over and hugged him, and Kosmo whined a little at the unsanctioned hugging, but didn’t try to interfere.
‘Nobody’s ever been proud of me,’ said Keith softly into her shoulder.
‘That’s ridiculous,’ replied Krolia. ‘I’m proud of you. Your dad was proud of you every day. Shiro is proud of you. Allura and all the other paladins are. The Garrison is, all of Earth is, all the Universe is proud of you. The Blade of Marmora is so, so proud of you, Keith Kogane.’
It took a while for Keith to be ready to go after that, but eventually he managed to stop crying, wash his face, tie his hair up again and leave.
Thace wasn’t in his room or in training - in fact Keith ran into Ezor first in the central lounge, and she grinned hugely when she saw him. ‘Oh hey, if it isn’t the Commandant! You’re looking happy, did they knock you up yet?’
If looks could kill, Ezor would have been a smouldering crater. Instead she cringed and said, ‘Sorry, uh… didn’t realise it was such a sensitive subject.’
‘I know everyone’s curious, the news’ll get out when we’re ready, alright?’ said Keith irritably.
‘Right. I mean yes sir.’
‘Okay.’ Keith wasn’t too sure how he felt about Ezor - they’d been allies and they’d seriously attempted to kill each other, but she didn’t seem malicious and now she was a Blade she seemed perfectly happy to accept him as a superior officer. Which was another weird thing to think about. He pinched the bridge of his nose and said, ‘Have you seen Thace?’
‘Uh… yeah, he’s gonna be in the engineering bays all day helping build this new teleduv.’
Keith nodded. ‘Great. Thanks, Ezor.’ Then he turned around and left.
And Thace was indeed where Ezor said he would be - in the biggest of the base’s four engineering bays, standing under an already terrifyingly large piece of space tech that Keith knew was only a tiny part of the finished teleduv. Accompanying him were Antok, Zethrid and two cadets that Keith only vaguely knew, currently all poring over a set of plans in Zethrid’s hands.
‘Honestly, I feel like we’ve built bigger teleduvs in worse conditions, this should be a snap,’ Zethrid was saying. ‘At least we’re not tryin’ to shoot each other now, huh?’ This was met by a stony silence, in which Keith’s footprints echoed on the floor.
‘Tough crowd,’ said Keith as they all turned to face him. ‘Yeah, we’re all friends, this should be easy. The hard part is up to Lance. Hi, everyone.’ He was greeted with a chorus of ‘hello sir’s and ‘hi Keith’s and he turned to the two new faces, a young woman who looked even more feline than most galra usually did, and a fullblood galra of indeterminate gender and very luxurious fur, almost as tall as Kolivan. ‘Let’s see… Cadets Meeshka aaaand… oh, damn, I’m sorry, you’re going to have to help me. There’s been a lot of new faces around.’
‘Danit, sir,’ said the cadet.
‘Pleased to meet you, how’s the teleduv going?’
Danit looked a little uncertain, but this was apparently addressed to Antok, who had not stopped wearing the mask and hood in public. Keith was disappointed, but not surprised, and hadn’t commented on it.
‘It’s been going very well. No major hitches just yet - actually I am only here to oversee, today. This is Thace’s project, and under his supervision, Zethrid and Ezor’s, since they have prior experience in this.’
Keith’s brow creased. ‘Is there any reason why I found Ezor in the lounge and not here, then?’
‘She’s fetching lunch for us,’ said Thace. ‘I ordered her to go.’
‘Huh.’ Keith thought for a second. ‘OK, well, I have a different idea. How about all of you except Thace go and have your lunch with Ezor in the lounge. I need to talk to Thace alone for a bit, please.’
Meeshka and Danit looked surprised, Zethrid gave him the start of a knowing smirk until Keith returned a death-glare, Thace suddenly tensed and Antok merely watched him with that inscrutable mask.
‘Of course, Keith,’ said Antok. ‘Come along, everyone. Zethrid, call Ezor and tell her we’re on our way.’
When they were gone, Keith checked the door - Antok had locked it behind them but Keith checked anyway - and went back to Thace. ‘So,’ he said, suddenly shy. ‘I bet you’ve figured out what all this is about.’
‘I’ve got an idea,’ said Thace, drawing him close and breathing him in. ‘Actually, more than an idea, I can smell it on you.’
If Keith had thought being scented by Thace was good before, now was ten times as good. He gave a little shuddering sigh and wrapped his arms around Thace’s neck, thinking of home and family and safety and how he wanted to stay right here like this forever and never let go. He licked his suddenly dry lips and said, ‘Yeah. It’s twins. The other one’s Ulaz’s. That’s OK, right?’
Thace chuckled softly and licked Keith’s scent gland, making him shudder all over. ‘That explains why I can smell him on you. Yes, darling, it’s absolutely fine. I’m going to keep telling you till you believe me, if you have children with every other alpha in the circle I am going to be happy for you and love them like my own.’ He paused. ‘You’re shaking, precious. Want to sit down? Are you alright?’
Keith nodded and Thace sat down, Keith safe in the cup of his crossed legs. ‘I’m fine, really,’ he said, leaning his head on Thace’s chest. ‘Even better now. I mean, I know they’re gonna come back and I’m going to have to move, but right now, this…’ He scented Thace, who cocooned him safely in a tender embrace, ‘...this right here is perfect.’
‘Well, yes, eventually you will have to move,’ admitted Thace, kissing Keith on the top on the head. ‘But I could let Antok take over the project for the day. We could go back to your room, or mine, and then I could hold you as long as you want.’
Keith looked up. ‘Would that be OK? This is the big project, I don’t wanna get in the way and I’m still gonna be here tonight- mph!’ The protest was kissed right out of his mouth and Keith almost froze, but his defenses were overridden by the scent of Thace and security and he could only close his eyes and melt into the kiss.
When it ended, Thace rested his forehead against Keith’s and said, ‘This project will absolutely be here tomorrow. There will never be another day like this for you. You realise Ulaz could have stepped down to spend the rest of the day with you? That’s how important you and your position are.’ He made a dismissive little gesture and added, ‘And how dedicated to his work Ulaz is, I suppose, but he has fewer people he can trust to take his place, and I daresay we will see him before the day is out. Do you understand?’
Keith nodded, only half-comprehending. ‘Then… I guess I should go back to my place so Ulaz can find me when he comes off shift. But I’ve never seen your quarters before. I kinda wanna go there. I guess later, we’ve got time.’
Thace smiled. ‘We can tell Ulaz you’re there, he can come join us later. Nobody said you had to be tethered to one location - in fact I believe one of the conditions of your being here was that you go where you like.’
Keith nodded, chewing his lips. ‘Yeah, sure, let’s go to your room. That sounds good.’
It turned out that Keith didn’t know the base as well as he thought he did - he’d been in the habit of having Kosmo teleport him around if anything was further than a couple of corridors away, so he was a little surprised when Thace steered him through a doorway at the back of the room, which he hadn’t noticed was there before. But right ahead was a glowing orange display which said, in galra, ‘Surface: Engine Room 3’.
‘Floor 14: Room 9,’ said Thace, the door closed behind them and almost immediately, the display changed and a different door opened, on their right. They stepped out, straight into what had to be Thace’s room.
Keith looked around. There were plants everywhere, and the fact that the room was underground didn’t matter because it was bright with artificial sunlight, two of the walls replaced with screens showing scenes of the Olkarion horizon as if through floor-to-ceiling windows. Of course there was a little kitchenette, and instead of chairs, a couple of enormous beanbag-like things a little like the ones they’d seen the king of Olkarion using when Voltron had tried to rescue him that day. Keith blinked hard.
‘This… this is amazing. You liked Olkarion, huh?’
‘Is it that easy to tell?’ said Thace, his smile gone a little sad. ‘Such a shame. It was such a lovely place. A few of these plants are from there, but when they die, they’ll be extinct. Anyway - would you like to sit down?’
‘Sure!’ Keith sat down in one of the beanbags and was instantly swamped. ‘Fuck! Thace, you have to sit here with me, your beanbag thing’s gonna eat me. Also I got you something - fuck, no I didn’t, or I did, but I left it back at my place.’
Thace laughed and sat down beside him, and then the chair was significantly more buoyant and comfortable. ‘It doesn’t matter, you can show me later. First order of business, we must let Antok and Ulaz know where you are.’
‘And Mom. I’ll call her, you call them.’
That was the work of a few minutes, and then Keith was curled up against Thace’s side, listening to him talk about the various plants around them. One of them in particular Thace was very proud of, a tall, wide-leaved sapling in a blue ceramic pot, which sprouted pink blossoms and a couple of oblong fruits about the size of a hen’s egg. Thace plucked one and handed it over - it was smooth like a mango, but the skin, vermilion shading to gold dusted with blue freckles, gave under Keith's fingernail, yielding a bead of pinkish juice.
‘It’s called a sah,’ said Thace. ‘We've been trying to grow them as much as possible but they’re known as omega fruits for a reason, this one has only really started producing either flowers or fruits since I've been feeding it your slick.’
Keith stopped, the fruit halfway to his mouth. ‘You what.’
Thace winced. ‘Is that bad? It doesn't blossom at all until it comes into contact with a fertile omega.'
'That's fucked up. So what, does it pass through my system to germinate or something?'
‘No - here, look.’ Thace dug out a tablet from somewhere and brought up a picture of the plant - it looked much bigger in the picture, towering over the person beside it, who was holding a fruit the size of an ostrich egg. ‘Normally, they would grow, and if not fed any slick they would simply not flower and therefore not fruit. But with your slick dug into the soil, it attunes to you, and begins to produce these fruits, which are - well, anyone else would find them tasty, but they considered the best thing for a pregnant omega for a very good reason.’
‘Huh.’ Keith examined the fruit in his hand, then looked back at the picture. ‘Is it ripe? It looks… small, compared to that one.’
‘Oh, yes. Perfectly ripe.’
Keith looked at the fruit, then back at Thace. Thace wouldn’t give him anything without vetting it with Ulaz to find out if it was poisonous to humans, he was pretty sure. He could trust Thace. He raised the sah fruit to his lips and took a bite. The skin burst under his teeth and his mouth filled with fresh-sweet liquid, he had to suck quickly to stop it all dribbling down his chin. To his surprise, it was like a citrus inside, instead of fleshy like a peach.
‘Fuck,’ he said, wiping some off his lip and sucking it off his fingertips. ‘That’s delicious.’
‘I hear it tastes different to everyone,’ replied Thace. ‘No, thankyou, I don’t want any - it simply won’t taste very good to an alpha. But if you would give me the stone when you’re done, I’d be grateful.’
Keith had his mouth full and so his reply was hampered, and besides, this was when the door buzzer went - to his surprise and indignation, Thace actually called out, ‘Come in!’ instead of telling the intruder to leave. And then his hackles went down when it turned out to be Ulaz.
Ulaz, who took one look at Keith and turned his best stern face on Thace. ‘I don’t believe you gave him the sah while I wasn’t here. He’s pregnant with both our children and you present him with that alone.’
Thace shrugged. ‘You could have come off shift and accompanied your omega. Now come here and sit with us.’
Ulaz looked like he was going to come out with some kind of answering retort, but then he didn’t, and crossed the room to join them on the beanbag. There really wasn’t much room for three, and Keith had to stop stuffing his face for a second so that Ulaz and Thace could arrange him so that he was comfortably cradled between both their laps, their arms around him.
‘It’s good, then?’ said Ulaz. ‘I promise I checked it for any possible adverse affects to humans before I agreed to let him offer it to you.’
‘Uh-huh,’ said Keith, through a full mouth. ‘Tastes great.’ That was all they heard from him till the pinkish fruit was all gone, leaving only a large, tear-shaped stone. He raised up to eye level between finger and thumb and said, ‘Hey Thace, do you need my slick with this?’
Ulaz and Thace shared a smiling little glance, then Thace took the stone and said, ‘Well, technically yes, but it can wait till you’re ready next. Are you ready?’
‘I… not right now. I actually have some questions if that’s OK?’
‘Always,’ said Ulaz, nose pressed to Keith’s neck.
Keith closed his eyes and let himself be calmed, and when his breathing had fallen in step with Ulaz’s and he knew all the things he wanted to ask, he opened his eyes and said, ‘So, is it safe for me to fuck now? Won’t it harm the babies?’
‘At the moment, it’s perfectly safe, even with someone as… well-endowed as Antok,’ replied Ulaz. ‘I will let you know as soon as it will become an issue.’
Thace dropped a kiss on the other side of Keith’s jaw and said, ‘If you were into some of the more violent type of galra sex practices that might be something to worry about, but so far you don’t seem the type.’
Keith snorted. ‘Right. OK, that leads me to the next thing. What about training? Can I still do combat training? Will it affect the advanced pilot class?’
‘Yes, it will affect both to some extent,’ said Ulaz. ‘You’re officially on temporary medical leave, please refrain from either till I have talked to Kolivan, then I will give you your altered schedule. It shouldn’t take longer than a day or two, don’t worry, I know you hate being inactive.’
‘Cool. I’m not, like, too buzzed today, though. Or at least I was, but not anymore. Here, help me get this tunic off.’
Helping each other, the three of them stripped down to their undersuits and then, after a moment’s thought, Keith removed his top and settled down again, only to have a soft blanket wrapped around his shoulders by Ulaz. Thace draped a warm palm over Keith’s stomach, making him grin.
‘Little bit early to be feeling them kick, Thace.’
‘I know that,’ replied Thace. ‘I just want to be close, is all. Have you thought of any names?’
‘A few. What about you guys?’
Thace dropped his gaze. ‘I… actually never thought I would have kits. So I would need more time to think. What about you, Ulaz?’
Ulaz pressed his lips to Keith’s hair, arm wrapped around his middle over Thace’s hand, clearly thinking. Finally he said, ‘Well, a long time ago I had a good friend named Makat.’
‘Oh, I remember him,’ said Thace softly.
‘Was he a Blade?’ asked Keith.
‘Oh, yes,’ said Ulaz. ‘And Blades frequently die so that others might live, but he… fought three Empire soldiers to the ground so that I could complete a vital resuscitation. We brought him back, but we couldn’t save him.’
There was a short silence while Keith contemplated this. ‘I told Mom I’d name one Yorak if there was a boy,’ he said at last. ‘That’s what she wanted to name me, she said it’s traditional in my family.’
‘So I hear.’ Ulaz smiled and kissed him just behind the ear. ‘It’s all up to you, Keith. It was only a suggestion.’
‘Ulaz, Makat is a fantastic name and if I don’t name one of these after your friend then I’m totally going to have more, right? That’s what a Commandant does , right?’
Ulaz turned Keith’s face up to his own and kissed him - Keith opened his mouth to the kiss, but it stayed tender and gentle, and when Ulaz released him, all he said was, ‘Don’t strain yourself. You have much longer than a normal human lifetime, so take your time.’
Keith nodded and smiled. ‘Yes, doc.’ At that point, Thace tipped Keith gently into Ulaz’s lap and stood up, and Keith turned and glared at him. ‘Where are you going?’
‘We two haven’t eaten since breakfast, and sahs won’t feed omegas forever,’ said Thace firmly, leaning down to drop a kiss on Keith’s upturned lips. ‘We need a proper meal, my darling.’
‘Oh. Well… OK.’
It was not to be, however, at least not for Keith. What with the soothing sounds and smells coming from the kitchen and the gentle petting from Ulaz, he found himself getting more and more drowsy until finally, he closed his eyes and knew no more that day.
Notes:
(Of course Thace makes some food for when Keith wakes up, but it turns out he's basically out for most of the morning and Kosmo shows up to take him back to his quarters. So the next thing Keith eats, besides snacks, is dinner.)
Yeah, this one took a while, sorry, no excuse for that, but hey, I got a fair way on Breath of the Wild! I know I'm a bit late for Valentine's Day, it occurred to me about two days later that if I'd put in a bit of a spurt about a week later I could have had a V-Day release but maybe it's for the best. Now this won't get lost amongst the millions of Valentine Sheith fics.
I hope you had a good Commercially Mandatory Couple Day, Ace hugs to all of you, and I especially hope you took advantage of Cheap Chocolate Day on the 15th. I didn't, I'm too lazy.
Chapter 15: I Ask You This
Summary:
Keith has some doubts, some questions and a really good meal.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Keith told himself he should know better, there would be no jealousy, no bitterness tainting the air. Still, as he thought about the upcoming announcement at the following night's dinner, he couldn't help the memories rising in his mind: the rough hands that had snatched away his toys in his first care home; the hate campaign that had scared away his first best friend; the jealousy whenever anyone spoke of his talents. And Griffin, too - to him he was a prize, to be crowed over, Griffin would never have tolerated anyone else's hands on Keith.
The hand taking his own made him jump, jerking him out of his reverie, and Keith realised that he hadn't even noticed Antok sitting down beside him, or Kosmo's concerned nose in his lap.
‘Keith? Are you alright?’
Keith leaned his head gratefully on Antok's shoulder, petting Kosmo's head with his free hand. ‘Fine… Well, maybe not.’
Antok said nothing, just left space for Keith to fill. In that moment, Keith adored him for it.
‘I think… This might be where I admit I'm kinda fucked up.’
‘That's normal,’ said Antok. ‘If there isn't the right sort of help on base I'll comb the universe-’
‘Hey. No dramatic promises,’ said Keith, scowling. ‘You know the rules.’
Antok chuckled and kissed the top of his head. ‘Alright. Then I will do my best to get you the right help for you. Better?’
Keith nodded. ‘Yeah, better. I mean… I think I'm gonna give this Horns-Never-Lowered lady a try but I met her and she's really… weird . I think I'm gonna spend more time explaining being human than anything else.’
‘Understandable,’ said Antok. ‘It’s been a while since the Marmora have had a Blade more alien than Regris but I think Horns-Never-Lowered could steal his throne. She is certainly nothing like human.’
‘She’s also, well… female? I think? At least she said it was simpler to think of her that way?’
‘The Oq’daspec’tan have a total of five sexes and eight secondary genders. I believe they all use female pronouns when off-planet in order to be diplomatic.’
‘Oh.’ Keith counted the possible combinations. ‘Forty possible sexes?’
‘No. Not all combinations are possible. You should ask Horns-Never-Lowered some day. Also, you shouldn’t feel any pressure to take her as your counsel. What would be ideal?’
Keith turned into the grey cable-knit embrace, and Kosmo climbed onto the couch and arranged himself over both their laps while he thought about it. ‘It needs to be a guy. Someone who knows at least something about humans? I’d say it should be you, except having it be someone in the circle sounds like a really bad idea,’ he said at last. ‘You’re a really great listener, Antok.’
Antok purred, leaning down to scent him. ‘I’d love to be your counsel, but you are entirely right, it should be someone outside of the circle. I am very flattered that you feel you can talk to me, though.’
‘Never would’ve known when I met you, huh?’ Keith gave a chuff of a laugh through his nose, which Antok echoed.
‘Indeed. Well, I was trying to give an entirely different impression. I remember I failed to intimidate you then. You saw me and challenged me the first chance you had.’
‘Oh, I was intimidated, I just always dealt with threats by trying to fight them.’ Keith grinned up at him. ‘You must have noticed that.’
‘I had. It’s variably an endearing and an infuriating quality, depending on how much danger it puts you in. I will send you a list of the therapists we have, and if none of those will serve, we will find you another. Does that help?’
‘Yeah.’ Keith nodded, and breathed in Antok's scent, warm and calming. ‘That's enough for now.’
Just then, Thace sat down on Kosmo's other side, smelling of warmth and good food, and said, ‘Sorry to interrupt, but the others are on their way.’
It took a while for everyone to arrive and be settled - some of the things Thace was working on in the kitchen had to be put into suspended animation because of it, and someone apparently had stopped Kolivan on the way on some important item of business, but eventually everyone was there. Keith looked around at them all, his circle, and a warm swell rose up inside him. He locked eyes with his mother, who grinned encouragingly.
‘OK. Well, you all know what I've got to say,’ he said. Why am I so nervous? There's no need to be nervous. Antok reached over and squeezed his hand, and he let out a long, shaky breath. Yeah, he could do this. ‘Right. First of all… Yes, my heat was successful and I'm pregnant. In fact it's twins, so great job, guys.’
‘You flatter us,’ said Kolivan, although he looked uncharacteristically pleased. ‘You are the one who performed excellently here.’
‘Who's the alpha?’ asked Regris hopefully.
‘Ulaz and Thace,’ replied Keith. ‘Sorry, Regris, maybe next time.’
Regris laughed. ‘Sorry? Don't be sorry. I'm gonna be an uncle!’ He turned to Ulaz, who was closest, and gave him a powerful thump on the back. ‘You better watch out, I'm gonna teach your kit to hack into allll the medical databanks.’
‘Then we shall know who to blame, won't we,’ said Ulaz, but he was smiling.
‘Improve your firewalls next time,’ replied Regris, toothily smug. Keith got the impression Regris may have hacked into Ulaz’s computers before.
‘Anyway,’ he said, ‘I just have something here - Ulaz, this is for you.’ He handed over a box - from the size of it, it was clearly another mug, which turned out to be dark blue and have written on it in Galran, ‘I DON'T STOP WHEN I'M TIRED, I STOP WHEN I'M DONE’.
Ulaz read it aloud and nodded. ‘Well, I can certainly agree with that sentiment.’
‘Thought you might,’ said Keith. ‘You’re like Kolivan, you work too hard. Anyway. Thace, catch!’ The package he tossed to Thace was clearly not a mug - it was bigger, flatter and softer, and when Thace unwrapped it, turned out to be a blue apron with a pink frill and ‘KISS THE COOK’ written across the chest in big pink letters, in Galran.
Thace stared at it, then started to laugh. ‘I suppose this is some big human joke?’ he said, putting the apron on. ‘How do I look?’
‘Supremely kissable,’ replied Keith, leaning over Kosmo - who refused to move - to kiss him. ‘And yeah, of course it’s a big human joke, you know me by now.’
‘Sometimes I am not so sure, but yes. And as I am the cook, and have been kissed suitably, it is time for dinner. It’s a special celebration meal based on what we still know of pre-empire galran tradition, only I had to fill in with Olkarian and Korean-American where there were gaps.’
Keith nearly choked. ‘With what?’
‘Oh, darling, don't look so shocked,’ said Krolia. ‘Of course I told him where your father is from. Well done for doing the extra research, Thace.’
There was, in fact, Tex’s mac ‘n’ cheese, which Keith doubted was traditional anywhere, and a bowl of sliced sar fruit in front of Keith’s place. The centrepiece, though, seemed to be some kind of long roasted bird - at least it had wings, and feet, but also it had a fish tail and the skin was scaly and shone silvery in the light. It was surrounded by almost totally spherical hardboiled eggs and roasted vegetables, and around the plate was laid a necklace of red and green beads, little bones and shockingly large fangs.
Keith blinked at it. ‘What in the hell is that?’
‘It’s a chtar’kh,’ said Kolivan, taking his place and accepting a serving of rather more familiar sticky rice with seaweed from Thace. ‘A predatory flying fish from Daibazaal, they are now no longer extinct and so Thace and Ulaz took some time off this morning to hunt one down for you personally. And very efficiently, I may say.’
‘We very nearly didn’t have the time,’ said Ulaz. ‘But you slept very heavily this morning, so we did it then. Also, you have given us gifts, but there is one we wish to give to you. Thace?’
‘No, you do it, Ulaz, I will serve dinner,’ said Thace.
Ulaz nodded and picked up the necklace. ‘This is made from the bones and teeth of the chtar’kh, and Thace and I made it in the traditional way, although I admit we did have to replicate the red and green beads on such short notice.’
‘Oh. Oh, wow.’ Keith took it, examined how the leather had been intricately braided (with a little unevenness, clearly neither Thace nor Ulaz were used to this) and the tips of the fangs carefully filed so as not to scratch his skin. ‘That’s lovely - help me with this?’
Thace, who was nearest, immediately put the jug of sauce down on the table - Krolia picked it up again and started serving herself - and fastened the necklace around Keith’s neck. Then he leaned down and scented him, and in that moment, Keith felt entirely happy.
‘It looks incredible on you,’ said Thace softly.
‘I bet,’ replied Keith. ‘Thanks so much, this is amazing. I can’t remember the last time anyone gave me something so nice.’
‘I wish your father could have been here to see this,’ said Krolia. ‘He’d have been so proud.’
‘I…’ Keith looked down, nothing to say. ‘Yeah. I don’t know what he’d have thought of all this, to be honest. But… yeah. Oh wow, is that budae jjigae?’
‘I hope so,’ said Thace, heaping spoonfuls onto Keith’s held-out plate. ‘I did research it, and followed Krolia’s instructions to the best of my ability.’
‘Oh, everyone’s budae jjigae is different,’ said Keith, scooping a forkful of ramen, sausage, tofu, rice cake and what definitely looked like spam into his mouth. ‘It’s great. Not quite like Dad’s but still great.’
The chtar’kh turned out to be rather more meaty than Keith was used to fish tasting, but delicious all the same, with the skin salty and crispy like chicken skin - he noticed that Regris had taken a double portion and added extra salt, with what looked suspiciously like shredded nori on the side.
After the meal was mostly over, Keith cleared his throat and said, a little nervously, ‘So… does this mean I’m sleeping with just Ulaz and Thace now? Like, till the twins are born?’
There was a brief, surprised silence, and Thace said, ‘Not if you don’t want to.’
‘Of course, I should have realised this was going to be a thing,’ said Krolia. ‘Keith, honey - you can sleep with anyone you want to. This isn’t Earth.’
‘Oh.’ Keith considered a moment, then looked at Thace, and then Ulaz. ‘So you guys won’t be mad if I ask, say, Kolivan to stay tonight?’
‘Of course not,’ said Ulaz.
‘We’ve had your almost undivided attention for a few days now. Why would we be mad?’
‘Cool.’ Keith smiled, and turned to Kolivan. ‘You’re not doing anything tonight, right?’
Kolivan returned the smile. ‘Nothing that can’t be cancelled. I’d be delighted.’
Keith leaned his head on Kolivan's shoulder and stared into the semi-dark. The celebration dinner, the laughter, all the happy kisses and delicious comforting food, all of it seemed a distant memory - not so distant that Keith couldn’t still taste the complicated sah fruit soufflé-sorbet concoction that Thace had produced for dessert, or the tangy berry pancakes that everyone else had got. But now, with the only sounds Kosmo’s doggy snores, his own breathing and the sound of Kolivan’s heartbeat under his ear, it seemed like an echo. He rubbed the short, fine fur of Kolivan’s chest between his fingertips - all the Blades had different fur, even, and that had come as a surprise. Kolivan’s wasn’t the softest in the circle, that honour went to Antok, but Keith had still been surprised to find how pleasant it was to the touch.
‘Something's bothering you, kit,’ said Kolivan softly, running his fingers through Keith's hair.
‘A lot of things are bothering me.’
‘Do you wish to talk about it?’
Keith laughed mirthlessly. ‘God, no. I probably should, though. I probably need a professional.’ He turned and buried his face in Kolivan's shoulder, breathing in his scent.
‘That doesn't mean you can't talk to other people you trust. In fact, the more opinions you have, the closer you may get to the truth.’
Keith looked up. ‘I thought you were a spy?’
‘Knowledge or death, as they say,’ replied Kolivan, shrugging slightly. ‘Besides, we are no longer spies, we are spreaders of peace and goodwill, and I believe you are responsible for that.’
‘Pff.’ Keith collapsed against Kolivan’s shoulder and was silent again, absorbed in the touch of warm fingertips dragging up and down his spine. ‘Kol?’ he said finally, drawing circles in the fur of Kolivan’s arm. ‘Is it normal to feel guilty that I'm here in bed with you when I'm pregnant with Ulaz and Thace's kits?’
There was a short silence, and the hand on his back stilled for a moment, then Kolivan replied carefully, ‘Do you know, I was waiting for you to ask that? If not of me, of one of the others, or your mother. Yes, it’s very normal, especially for first pregnancies. For you, who comes from a largely monogamous culture, it would be strange if you didn't.’
‘So… how do I deal with it? I can’t make it just stop.’
Kolivan opened his mouth to answer, then frowned and reconsidered. ‘That is true, you can’t. There are some enemies you can’t cut down in one blow, and many of them come from inside yourself. But you should remember that you are not facing any of these foes alone - and oh, what is that face? Do we not have your trust? Do I not have your trust?’
Keith hastily stopped rolling his eyes and schooled his face into an apologetic smile. ‘No, no, that’s not what I meant, I’m sorry, Kol-’
‘Hm.’ Kolivan sat up and dragged a finger along Keith’s jaw. ‘I don’t think we do have your trust as much as I would like. It was wrong of me to assume and I apologise.’
Keith leaned his cheek into Kolivan’s hand, closed his eyes and said, ‘It’s OK, I know who you are.’
‘And who am I?’
‘You’re my alpha. You look after me.’
‘That’s right. And the others are also your alphas. In the circle, they - we, even - exist to keep you happy and comfortable, to make sure you and the kits wish for nothing. If there is jealousy then it is a failing of the alpha concerned and a dishonour to the circle. I would hope if any of us behaved that way you would eject the alpha concerned post-haste.’
‘And that wouldn’t come back to bite me in the ass later? I mean, come on, Kol, it’s all been real nice but sooner or later one of you has to stop being perfect.’
Another silence - Keith didn’t remember Kolivan ever having this much trouble finding his words, it was unnerving, but at last he said, ‘None of us are perfect. Of course we are all doing our best to make you feel safe and at home, but I understand if you are…’
‘Suspicious,’ said Keith, at the same time as Kolivan said, ‘Cynical.’
Keith hid his face in Kolivan’s neck and breathed in his scent, it saved him from having to look up. ‘Amounts to the same thing in the end. The honeymoon period can’t last forever.’
‘That's the… happy period?’
‘The cute lovey period after you first get together. It stops after a cou- a circle start living with each other for a while and really being aware of each other’s flaws.’
‘Ah.’ Kolivan lay down again on his side, curling Keith into his shadow, and drew contemplative circles on Keith’s back with his clawtips. ‘Well, I’m sure mine are obvious.’
‘Not right now,’ mumbled Keith, right into the dip of his collarbone. ‘Keep doing that, please.’
‘No? If you wish to list the things you find irritating about me, I promise I will only take them as constructive criticism.’
Keith licked his lips and took a deep breath. ‘I. I wish you’d be nicer to Antok when other people are around.’
Kolivan’s hand stilled for a moment, then resumed its hypnotic path. ‘Oh, Keith. Antok and I… what we have is complex. He wouldn’t respond well to that.’
‘Yeah, maybe, but it does bug him when you outright deny that you have a thing. You have to be blind not to notice that.’
Keith pulled back enough to glare at Kolivan, who hesitated, then said, ‘I promise I will discuss it with him. Is that enough?’
‘You care about him and want him to be happy, right?’
‘Of course I do.’
‘Then yeah, that’s enough.’ Keith settled back down in Kolivan’s arms. ‘Let’s just go to sleep.’
Notes:
So this is a very short chapter, and it's been a while coming, almost entirely because of current events. I'm not sick, for once, but I've been concentrating on keeping sane, so I figured I would give you a short chapter sooner rather than make you wait longer for a bigger one. Everyone stay safe out there! <3
Chapter 16: An Evening For The Three Of Us
Summary:
In which Keith goes to spend a night with Kolivan and Antok. Regris and Thace discover something about their own relationship. Kolivan has a really awesome hobby.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Keith didn’t hear any more about it until a couple of days later, but it seemed that Antok was simply waiting for a chance to get him alone. The apartment always seemed to have at least two other people in it, though, so eventually Antok just drew Keith aside and said, ‘Keith, may I have a word? In private?’
Oh, here it is, thought Keith. Aloud, he said, ‘Sure. Uh, Regris is still in bed, want to go sit in the nursery?’
‘Lead the way.’
Keith had taken to spending a lot more time in the apartment’s nursery of late - it had two doors, one leading to the bedroom and one to the main room, and big windows along one wall that showed the stars spiralling slowly by. It was too early to have done much discussion about decor, but already there were two cradles, plenty of real storage - not the hi-tech stuff in the bathroom, tangible things like bookshelves and closets and toy chests. Keith had been adamant that the nursery have real furniture and be cosy as possible, hence the rocking chair and the squashy sofa and matching armchairs scattered around the room.
He sat down on the sofa and patted the space beside him - when Antok sat down he took up all the remaining space, but that was fine. This was a sofa meant for cuddling up, not for holding as many people (and space wolves) as possible.
‘You’ve made a good start on this room, I see,’ said Antok.
‘Yeah, I want… my kids should be comfortable.’
‘I’m sure they will be.’ He hesitated. ‘Keith, Kolivan said you were concerned for me. For us.’
Keith turned and rested his cheek against Antok’s chest, today cushioned in thick oatmeal-coloured wool, and sighed. ‘Yeah. Like, the way you get real tense when he denies you have anything in public.’
‘I don’t believe he’s ever done that,’ said Antok, surprised.
‘No, like that time when I asked if you were primaries and he told me to stop asking-’
‘Ah. That’s not the same thing.’ Antok tilted his head, thoughtfully petting Keith’s hair, then he said, ‘Obviously Kolivan and I have, as you put it, “a thing”. We have been, uh, partners? Couples? Best friends? Lovers, maybe…’ he winced, and Keith took mercy on him.
‘Any of those works except the best friends one,’ he said. ‘I could give you more but that’d just be confusing, humans have a lot of words for… that kind of thing.’
‘One day I will make you draw me a chart.’ Antok chuckled and the bass wobble reverberated through his chest. ‘Anyhow, we have been… partners, shall we say, for nearly thirty years and friends for longer. Our relationship is deep and complex. Kolivan is not the type to discuss his personal issues with just anyone and while you are not just anyone, I suspect I am very personal to him.’
‘Oh,’ said Keith, a little crestfallen.
Antok scented him and kissed the top of his head. ‘But don’t despair, lk’tak, come and have dinner with us tonight, and spend the night. We could let you in a little while you were in heat but you weren’t really in a mood to pay much attention, were you?’
‘Not really. I remember it was nice, though,’ replied Keith. ‘And Kolivan’s OK with this?’
‘It was his idea.’
‘Oh. Well I’d love to, then.’
By now, Keith knew - mostly knew - better than to think the other alphas would be put out by him leaving them to their own devices to the evening, but their actual reaction was completely unexpected.
‘For quiznak’s sake, at last!’
Keith stared at Ulaz - it was a most unexpected outburst, but the doctor only looked back over his mug and raised an eyebrow. ‘What do you mean, “at last”?’
‘He means,’ said Thace, ‘That ever since your diagnosis you’ve been walking around like a hunted animal, as if you thought the rest of the circle was off limits to you.’
‘Well… I’ve not exactly been keeping it secret.’ Keith sat down on the sofa between Ulaz and Regris, who put his arm around him. ‘I did kinda think that.’
‘Can’t really blame you, you never really had a circle before,’ said Regris, combing his fingers through the loose hair at Keith’s temple.
‘Mm.’ Keith leaned his head on Regris’ shoulder and said, ‘Just so you know, don’t feel like you have to not be in here while I’m gone. I know the kitchen in here is nicer than the general communal kitchen, and you can all hang out and train or play video games or bang or whatever you want to do.’
‘Honestly, I appreciate the offer, but I have a lot of work to do,’ began Ulaz.
‘And then he’d be very grateful to come back here and have dinner,’ interrupted Thace, a little louder. ‘With Regris and me and Krolia once her duties are over, and Kosmo. Because we’re a circle, aren’t we, not just each of us and Keith?’
That made everyone stop and stare at him. Ulaz found his words first, only to give a twitch of a smile and say, ‘If you say so,’ before draining his mug. Then he turned, kissed Keith tenderly, and added, ‘I have to go if I am to get anything significant done before this sentimental fool calls me to dinner. Have a good night with Kolivan and Antok and don’t worry.’
‘Uh… yeah. Later, Ulaz,’ said Keith. And Ulaz was gone.
Out of the corner of his eye Keith could see Regris, who looked as though Thace had casually thrown a new idea into his head and he was having a little trouble processing it enough to fit. Keith and Thace exchanged glances and Regris’s hair fluffed up and down a couple of times, his scales changing color from iridescent lavender tinged with blue-green, to bright mauve, to violet dusted with sky blue - when he turned back to Thace he was a nearly normal blue-violet, but his face was scattered with a faint sprinkling of bright green freckles that kept changing colour as he spoke. ‘So… I’m in your circle?’
Thace smiled fondly. ‘Yes, Regris. You’ve been in my circle for a long time.’
Regris’ hair fluffed up again and his scales went a deep, warm purple, so iridescent it was almost as if he was glittering. He didn’t move, though - at least, not till Keith pecked him on the cheek and said, ‘I’m gonna go change. You two have fun.’
Regris nodded, and the last thing Keith saw of either of them was Regris being folded into a sweet, tender kiss - it made something in Keith’s heart ache, reminded him of the wedding, but he stamped it down. It was stupid to feel that way, because Thace and Regris being together didn’t mean he couldn’t have either of them. It was nothing like Shiro at all.
In the end it turned out he’d been completely unable to decide what to wear to dinner, so he wore what everyone said made him look good - tight black jeans, a tight black t-shirt with a v neck that dipped just below his clavicle, and biker boots.
He found himself holding a recreation of his old red jacket for what seemed like hours, staring at the colour, thinking, This is what people see you as, the Red Paladin in the Black Lion, this is what you wore all that time, this is what he always saw you in. It’s just a jacket. Just a colour. You can wear red again. You can wear this jacket again, you always liked it.
Not today.
In the end, he threw it in the recycle chute and made another, this time in green and white, with epaulettes and white frogging down the front. Like the first one, it showed his stomach at the front and his butt - and knife - at the back. It would do.
It turned out Thace and Regris were far too preoccupied to ask their advice - although they raised their heads long enough to wish him luck as he left. So Keith had had no idea whether it was appropriate to bring a gift. When he messaged Krolia, she had not replied immediately, and Ulaz had said only, ‘Something small, if you must.’
So here he was at Kolivan’s door, holding a blue vase of yellow tulips and turning it nervously in his hands as he waited for the door to be opened. He didn’t have to wait long - and instantly he wished he’d taken more care with his clothes. Kolivan looked stunning, in a dark grey soft tunic with a wide, low neck, sleeves split to the elbow, hems embroidered in silver and purple; a pair of loose but clinging dark purple pants and a sleeveless open robe over the top, also purple and covered in intricate silver patterns. His hair was free of its braid, and fell carelessly over his shoulder, and his feet were bare.
‘Kolivan!’ said Keith. ‘You look… wow.’
Kolivan smiled, genuinely pleased. ‘You like it? You look very nice today as well. Come in, come in, don’t just stand in the hall. Antok, he’s here!’
‘I brought you - yeah. It’s not much.’ Keith stuck out the vase, feeling like an idiot, but Kolivan took it with a sense of surprised wonder that was definitely not expected.
‘Are these… real flowers?’
‘They’re only tulips. I couldn’t think what else to get you, I’m kinda bad at gifts that aren’t jokey.’
‘That falsehood aside, where did you get them? I’ve never heard of tulips, and the generator doesn’t produce live things.’
Keith shrugged. ‘Out of the food printer in the kitchen. I figured if it could print Earth veggies it could sure as hell print flowers, specially since so many of them are edible. Not tulips though! Well, maybe tulips for galra? I dunno. Sorry, I’m babbling…’
Kolivan placed the vase on a grid-like shelf on the wall to the right of the door, and turned his attention back to Keith. ‘No. Never. They are beautiful, thankyou.’ Then he turned his head in the direction of the door leading to the left and called, ‘Antok, he’s here! What are you doing in there, piercing your nipples?’
‘No, I’m just- Ugh, I should have done this half an hour ago,’ replied Antok from the other room. ‘Alright, ready.’
Kolivan and Keith exchanged glances. ‘It’s not what you’re thinking,’ said Kolivan softly. ‘He did that two hours ago.’
Keith’s mind raced, his eyes widened, but he recovered well. ‘I bet you helped him, too.’
‘Well, I’m his alpha, of course I did.’
At this point, Antok appeared - at first Keith thought he was wearing the usual long loose pants and soft sweater, only this time the sweater was cropped enough to show a stretch of muscled stomach and settled comfortably around his shoulders in a creamy haze. But he was wearing something underneath with a halterneck, and when he stepped forwards, the black pants parted down the outside seam, revealing a long length of surprisingly elegant leg - and, yes, bare feet. Keith had never seen Antok with his hair up before, the half-bun would have made him look good, but the eyeliner and smudge of dark lipstick made him positively sinful and Keith found himself wondering how Kolivan had coaxed him to do that.
Antok swallowed. ‘Is it too much?’
‘It’s incredible,’ said Keith. ‘You both look amazing. Damn, I wish you’d warned me, I feel like just some schmuck now.’
Antok was beside him in a second, warm arm around his waist and nose and lips ghosting along his shoulder. ‘You could never be just some schmuck,’ said Antok, as Kolivan’s breath glanced along the other side of Keith’s neck and his knees buckled from the overwhelming bliss of being scented by two alphas at once. He didn’t fall, though - strong arms around him from both sides held him up, he closed his eyes and just enjoyed the carefree drifting feeling for a moment.
‘You don’t even know what a schmuck is,’ he murmured at last, turning his head to smudge a kiss to the corner of Antok’s jaw.
‘That’s true, but nobody describes themselves as “just some hero” or “just some brilliant star in the heavens, glowing in every way”, so I’m fairly safe in assuming that it can’t be anything good.’
‘Pff.’ Keith was too floaty to shove Antok away, but he turned to Kolivan instead. ‘You’re going to turn me into food goo. And then fat lot of use I’ll be to you.’
Kolivan chuckled, lips vibrating against Keith’s pulse point. ‘Well, you’ll be full of essential vitamins and minerals, calorie-dense and very protein-efficient. But I see your point.’ He kissed Keith’s ear and straightened up, and Antok did the same, making very certain that Keith was steady on his feet before they released him.
‘So… I should probably take off my shoes, huh,’ said Keith, looking at Kolivan and Antok’s feet - both of them very galra, with two toes, like every other member of the circle except for Keith himself.
‘I wasn’t going to insist,’ said Kolivan. ‘But we usually go barefoot in here.’
Keith sat down and pulled off his boots and socks, - just as he was wondering what to do with them, Antok took them from them and stashed them in a hidden drawer by the door. ‘I like your feet,’ he said, offering him a hand up. ‘Sometimes I wonder why humans need so many toes.’
Keith stood, the carpet surprisingly soft under his feet. ‘Uh, I think it’s a tree-climbing thing? We’re descended from climbing apes.’
‘Fascinating.’ Antok’s voice dropped. ‘Now, we have a little while before dinner will be ready, why don’t you ask Kolivan about his hobbies?’
‘I heard that,’ said Kolivan.
‘I know,’ said Antok happily. ‘I’m going to see how the food is getting on.’ He turned and vanished into what was presumably the kitchen, and Keith turned back to Kolivan, who was watching him carefully.
‘What’s that look for?’ asked Keith.
‘You look…’
‘I’m not nervous.’
‘I was going to say guarded.’ He hesitated. ‘I must say on occasion, I wish I understood you better. Why so tense?’
Keith looked away, rubbing his arm fitfully. ‘I just… don’t want to get anything wrong. This is… well, it’s your place. Yours and Antok’s. I still don’t know hardly any thing about how you guys do this shit and-’
Suddenly, Kolivan was in front of him, cupping his face in his hands and tipping it up to look into steady, calm golden eyes. ‘You worry more intensely than anyone else I know. There is no need for it. We invited you here, our quarters are yours and we want you to be comfortable.’ Kolivan dropped a kiss on Keith’s forehead and smiled. ‘Do you truly wish to see how an old man amuses himself in his spare time? Or would you like a tour?’
The tour was tempting, but learning more about Kolivan was an opportunity never to be missed. ‘You know I have to know what this hobby of yours is,’ he said, unable to suppress the grin.
‘Alright. See there?’ Kolivan pointed to the set of shelves where he’d put Keith’s tulips. Some of the shelves in the grid were empty, most of them held a myriad of objects - lumps of rock or crystal, books, boxes, pictures in frames; even a Voltron Show action figure. But the display was dominated by many, many tiny figures, carved in wood, wielding…
Keith looked closer. ‘These are all Blades of Marmora. Are these all tiny little luxite blades? Did you-? How-? Wait, how many of these are here?’ He raised a hand to the shelf, then dropped it to his side again.
‘I made them, yes,’ said Kolivan, from just behind Keith’s shoulder. ‘I have statues of every Blade for the past, oh, I’m not sure. Nearly twenty years in Earth years, I think. Not all of them are here, of course, I ran out of space. Oh, but I tell a lie, many of the new recruits have no statues yet, and I’ve only just been able to make luxite blades for them all - luxite used to be far too valuable a resource to waste on…’
‘A memorial,’ said Keith softly, leaning in to Kolivan’s side.
‘I suppose you could see it that way,’ replied Kolivan, arm round Keith’s back.
‘So… let’s see… oh, there’s Regris.’ Keith pointed to the very obvious tailed figure, posed with a communicator in his hand and his blade in the other, tilted deliberately off-balance so that he could brace against the side of the shelf with his tail. ‘And there’s Ulaz, and - oh, that’s Thace, and Mom… oh. Oh, wait, that’s me.’
The tiny Keith figure was not in a combat pose, and he didn’t have his sword out, although there it was at his belt, where he always wore it. Instead he was seated on the edge of the shelf, one arm full of supply parcels. The really remarkable thing about the little statue was that he was the only one in the shelf that Keith could see who wasn’t wearing a mask.
‘Do you want to hold it?’ said Kolivan.
‘I… yes, please.’ Keith held out his hands as the tiny figure - maybe six inches tall - was placed in his hands. He was aware that Antok was watching from the doorway, and said, ‘You can come in, you know.’
‘Yes, don’t hover, come in,’ said Kolivan.
Antok obeyed and put an arm around Keith’s shoulders as he took in the loving delicacy of the carving’s face and hair, how it really did look like him in every detail. It must have been a very fine-grained wood to achieve this, but here it was.
‘There was another of you in the mask, before you became Commandant,’ said Antok.
‘I still have that one,’ said Kolivan. ‘But I needed a new one. New blade, new role, new uniform, new Marmora. New statue.’
‘It’s… amazing.’ Keith handed back the little statue. ‘So I bet you probably have loads of both of you.’
Kolivan and Antok exchanged glances. ‘A few,’ said Antok eventually.
‘Antok’s is the current project. But the previous version is up there.’ He pointed, and sure enough, there were the statues of the Blade leader and his lieutenant, standing to attention up on the highest shelf, looking for all the world as if they were searching the sky for enemy jets - except for the little detail that Antok’s tail was wrapped around Kolivan’s ankle. They must have been carved in one piece, in that case, thought Keith.
‘Could you…’ Keith began, then stopped.
‘Could I what?’ said Kolivan, cocking one brow.
‘It doesn’t matter. It’s a big ask for you but definitely nothing necessary for me.’
Keith definitely didn’t miss the half-amused, half-tired glance Kolivan and Antok shared over his head, but then they clearly weren’t trying to hide it. Besides, a second later he was being cradled in Kolivan’s arms, and Kolivan was stroking his hair over and over. ‘Keith. Tell me, please. Let me please my omega.’
Keith snorted into Kolivan’s shoulder. ‘I bet you say that to all the omegas.’
Kolivan sighed heavily. ‘How many do you think there’s been? If you must know, I’ve only ever been in a circle with two other omegas. The others were mainly just to help fellow Blades with their heat.’
‘Maybe I can help you get what you want?’ said Antok suddenly, lips against the back of Keith’s neck. ‘I want to make you happy too.’
‘Ohgodthat’sgood,’ moaned Keith. ‘Fuck. I think you need to stop or I can’t talk.’
Antok chuckled, laid another kiss to Keith’s nape, and straightened up.
Keith cleared his throat. ‘Sorry, Antok, this one’s just for Kolivan. I just… I think… It’d be nice to have my own set of carvings of all of us in the circle. In the clothes we wear at my place, maybe with our mugs, or something like that?’
‘Obviously your hippo suit for you, then,’ said Kolivan, not looking flustered at all. ‘Naturally including Kosmo, and the kits when they arrive.’
‘I… well, if it isn’t too much trouble?’
Kolivan cupped his cheeks in massive blue palms and kissed him right on the dawning, hopeful smile. ‘No, lk’tak, it will be a pleasure and an honour. I’ll be glad to do it.’
‘What does that mean?’
‘Approximately… dear, or beloved. That you are close to my heart. There are many English words that mean nearly the same thing, but none that make an exact match, which I believe is why the translator failed to catch it.’
‘Oh.’ Keith smiled hugely, one arm around Kolivan, and turned to catch Antok in his embrace too. ‘You called me that too.’
‘I did. You are lk’tak to us both,’ said Antok, putting an arm around his alpha and his omega and kissing them each in turn. A warm thrill went up Keith’s spine and he let himself revel in the shared embrace.
Then Kolivan smudged a kiss on Antok’s chin and said, ‘How is dinner doing?’
‘I don’t know,’ replied Antok. ‘You should find out. It’s my turn to look after Keith.’
Kolivan chuckled. ‘That’s fair. Alright, I will be back shortly.’ Another quick peck for Keith, then Antok, and then he was gone.
‘God, you two have such an old-marrieds vibe,’ mumbled Keith into the curve of Antok’s shoulder.
‘Oh?’ said Antok, steering Keith towards a couch that looked a lot like the Garrison-issue style, which Keith had always privately thought was designed deliberately to be as uncomfortable as possible. ‘I know that marriage is the closest human thing to a primary bond, but other than that I don’t know what you’re implying here. Also what’s that expression for?’
‘OK, first of all I have sat on couches like this and they’ve always been like upholstered brickwork. This is so fucking comfortable, god damn.’
That made Antok laugh. ‘Well, I suppose when you can have a computer generate anything you have in mind, you can have it fulfil both your aesthetic sensibilities and your comfort requirements, even if they seemingly contradict each other.’
‘Yeah, fuck, I can’t wait to see what the bed is like.’ This made Antok choke a little. ‘Anyway, when I said you and Kol were like old-marrieds… it means it’s clear you’ve been a couple for a very long time. You’re - don’t take this the wrong way, right? - obviously part of each other. Like humans who’ve been married for so long that life now just includes each other and that’s that.’
Antok said nothing for a long time, and Keith waited for him to finish mulling it over. At last he turned to him, smiling and a little teal around the cheekbones, and said, ‘Yes. I think that’s… accurate. And I can’t speak for Kolivan but I’d like for that description to include you, too, one day. That would be nice.’
Keith had to bite his lip to stop the sudden swell of emotion - it must have shown, and dramatically, on his face, because Antok folded him in his massive embrace and held him till he could sit up again. At that point, he realised Kolivan was leaning on the doorframe, watching them with his arms folded and a fond little smile playing around his lips.
Keith wiped his suddenly damp eyes on the heel of his hand. ‘Sorry. Dinner getting cold?’
‘Not noticeably, but the table is set and it will be cold if you wait much longer. This way.’ And Kolivan turned and left the way he’d come, leaving Keith breathlessly grateful that he hadn’t asked any awkward questions.
Antok smudged a tear out of the corner of Keith’s eye and got up, helping him to his feet in the process. ‘Come on - time to show you that Thace isn’t the only one on this rock who can cook.’
‘I can’t wait,’ replied Keith, and took his arm.
Notes:
I honestly didn't think this fic would be this long. If I had, I'd have broken it at the pregnancy reveal. Oh, well. Anyway, this chapter is the first part of what was ambitiously going to be one chapter but I think I'll be lucky to fit into three, but hey! We get something to read in these trying times. I am at least glad the muse Clio still seems happy to kick this nonsense my way. Very long nonsense, but that's what you get when you appeal to the muse of epics.
Two other things: My pet peeve about sci-fi shows is how uncomfortable the furniture always looks. Voltron is in fact one of the worst offenders for Futuristic Airport Furniture and I will not have it for my characters who I love.
Second, the thing that Antok and Kolivan call Keith, lk'tak, is not ik'tak. If it were capitalised it would be Lk'tak. Pronounced kind of like 'luk-takk'. Just so that's clear.
Chapter 17: Wine Me, Dine Me, Satisfy Me
Summary:
In which Keith has dinner with Antok and Kolivan, and then gets to see them up close and personal.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Keith was a little surprised when the round table turned out to be set with Earth food - something that looked very much like Thai green curry with sticky rice and sweet and sour mixed vegetables, with plenty of prawn crackers to go with it.
‘Is it not to your liking?’ asked Kolivan, a note of concern surfacing in his voice.
‘Oh, no, it looks great,’ said Keith, taking his seat. ‘Smells amazing too. I just… wondered if you were gonna show me some more traditional Daibazaali cuisine, or something. I’m not disappointed, I promise!’
‘Ah, I see,’ said Antok, sitting down on Keith’s left. ‘We were intending to do something along those lines, but Krolia reminded us that most humans don’t eat arthropods on a regular basis, certainly not at the size found on Daibazaal, and you might be… that is, many Daibazaali meals, ah…’
‘We thought it would be best to ask your opinion first,’ supplied Kolivan, pouring them all a glassful of something yellow from the elegant blue decanter on the table.
‘Arthropods? You mean… giant insects?’ Keith considered, then shrugged. ‘Probably way better than a year and a half’s worth of food goo, especially with how well you guys can cook. I’d definitely give it a shot. What’s in the bottle?’
‘Banana-pineapple juice, or something very like it,’ replied Kolivan. ‘Now please, don’t delay any longer, the food will get cold unless we eat it.’
Keith was very happy to obey.
Dinner conversation had been slow to start - Keith desperately reaching around for something to talk about after he’d recovered from the chilli heat enough to talk at all. Of course Kolivan and Antok noticed and asked about his silence; he ducked his head and said, ‘I don’t wanna talk about heavy shit at the dinner table. And I can’t think of anything that’s not heavy or boring.’
‘Don’t trouble yourself about that,’ said Kolivan. ‘You needn’t entertain us, or worry about dragging the mood down. What do humans normally talk about at dinner?’
Keith grimaced. ‘Uh, at a dinner like this, a pretty common one is “so how did you two meet” but I could make a decent guess and I’d bet it wasn’t pretty.’
Antok leaned his elbows on the table, smiling wryly. ‘I can see why you’d think that,’ he said, and reached across to steal the basket of prawn crackers from in front of Kolivan.
‘Hey,’ said Kolivan, without much rancour, took the cracker Antok was holding out of his hand and turned back to Keith. ‘Actually we met when he was transferred from his base to the one I was living on because Haneke was also there and was pioneering a new type of reconstructive surgery. Haneke died long before the return of Voltron, but she trained Ulaz. I’ll show you her statue later, if you wish.’
Keith leaned forward in his chair, fascinated. ‘So is that where Antok met Ulaz, too?’
‘No, Ulaz didn’t appear for a long time,’ said Antok. ‘I was, oh, around the age Kolivan is now. Fifty-something. Kolivan was barely twenty. As for when…’ Antok trailed off. Keith realised he’d been holding a full fork in the air for several minutes, and put it in his mouth.
‘What Antok and I have has been a gradual slope,’ said Kolivan. ‘There is no telling “what” or “when” anything.’ He swirled his drink in his glass. ‘Actually no, that’s a lie. I can tell you that when you arrived and demanded we face one another in more ways than one…’
‘Oh god, I didn’t mean to get between you,’ began Keith, and both galra snorted.
‘Don’t be silly,’ said Antok. ‘If anything, we are closer because of you. I no longer have to wheedle Kolivan’s thoughts from him like dragging a sanlarch from its den.’
Kolivan’s brows went up, but he finished his mouthful before he said, ‘Oh, am I becoming transparent? I shall have to remedy that.’
‘No, don’t,’ said Keith. ‘Talking to a wall isn’t sexy.’ He stuffed a forkful of rice into his mouth as Antok very nearly choked on laughter across the table, and Kolivan merely shot them both a chastising look. ‘Actually, I do have a question.’
Kolivan raised his glass to him. ‘Anything you like, I will do my best to answer.’
‘Isn’t there a word in galra for what you guys have? You’re so… vague.’
There was a long pause, and Kolivan and Antok looked at each other in what Keith could only interpret as dismay - he winced, was on the point of apologising, when Kolivan sighed and said, ‘As I said, humans have so many complex terms for this, with minute differences in meaning and connotations - but galra don’t do things that way.’
‘At least, we don’t speak of it like that,’ said Antok. ‘I suppose in some ways it’s easier because we don’t have to fit under some rigid label? But it does make it harder to speak of, I agree.’
‘All I can say is that we’ve been in one another’s circle for a long time. Sometimes the circle had different members, sometimes it was just us.’
‘Antok said his circle has always been just you,’ said Keith.
‘Well, no, that’s not true,’ said Antok. ‘You don’t have to be having sex with someone to be in their circle. And I’m in your circle with all the others, aren’t I?’
‘We understand what you mean, though,’ said Kolivan. He finished the last bite of food on his plate and laid down his chopsticks. ‘We wanted you to know that you’re not getting between us. Or rather, we want you here. You’re invited.’
Keith had nothing to say to that, he was too busy thinking that his cheeks were heating up and he was probably blushing, god that was embarrassing, but Antok had got to his feet and was clearing the plates - pausing to drop a kiss to Keith’s temple and to Kolivan’s as he passed - to make way for dessert. When he returned, he didn’t set the table with bowls and spoons for everyone, or sundae dishes or anything of the sort - just a single plate in the middle of the table. He sat down, exchanged a knowing smile with Kolivan, and then both of them looked at Keith in a way that made him extremely suspicious.
The plate contained six small pastries that must have been extremely delicate from how carefully Kolivan picked one up - it crumbled slightly between his fingers and scattered the plate with a small shower of lilac powder even so.
‘You wished for Diabazaali traditional food? These are mnenga.’ He extended his hand towards Antok, who carefully bit the pastry in half, immediately coating both Kolivan’s fingers and his own mouth with the powder, pastry shards and an oozing, greenish liquid filling that practically burst from inside the cake. He ignored it, though, and let Kolivan feed him the rest of it, and then licked the mess from his fingers, finally closing the distance between them so that Kolivan could suck the sauce from his lips and kiss the taste out of his mouth.
Keith realised he was watching with his teeth buried in his lower lip at about the same time as two pairs of hooded, golden eyes turned on him.
‘It signifies-’ began Antok.
‘I can see what it signifies,’ rasped Keith. ‘Hot damn. Can. Can I try?’
‘Of course,’ said Kolivan, picking up the second pastry and offering it to him.
Keith leaned forward and bit the mnenga in two, deliberately clumsy - the filling, as much of it as he got, was both sweet and tangy, and he felt it drip down his chin so that pastry shards and the sweet powder coating stuck to it. He opened his mouth to lick Kolivan’s fingers - then had a second thought, locked eyes with him and waited, lips parted and tongue hanging out a little way, for Kolivan to feed him the cake. It was worth it to see Kolivan flush darker blue, swallow hard, and glance over at Antok.
‘I see him,’ said Antok in hushed tones. ‘Give him what he wants, I want my turn.’
Kolivan cleared his throat and focussed on Keith again. ‘Right.’ Then he placed the mnenga onto Keith’s tongue, only to have Keith suck it and his fingers right into his mouth like he was sucking on something else entirely. It didn’t last long, but when Keith had swallowed his pastry, Kolivan immediately cupped his other hand round Keith’s jaw so he could tilt it up, lick the sauce from his chin and drag him into an almost desperate kiss.
‘I like this tradition,’ purred Keith, right up close to Kolivan’s face. ‘How often does it end in people being fucked over the dinner table?’
‘That’s considered very bad table manners,’ replied Kolivan. ‘So I suggest you stop dithering and offer one of us a mnenga. We are both very highly trained but sometimes you tax even our control.’
Keith sat back, grinning. ‘You don’t wanna be telling me that. I might want to find out how much.’ But he picked up a pastry and examined it - the coating almost glittered in the light - and held it up to Antok. Antok’s eyes - one pale, one a bottomless pool of darkness surrounded by gold - flicked up to Keith’s face, back down to the mnenga, and his hand closed around Keith’s wrist, holding his hand in place as he bit the cake in half. The filling oozed out over Keith’s fingers, making flakes of pastry stick to his hand, but Antok was already sucking it clean, working carefully on each finger and finishing with a kiss to the palm - Keith whined softly in the back of his throat and bit the sound off halfway, mortified that he’d made it.
Antok looked up, smiling. ‘Oh, shy suddenly? Maybe you’ll gift one of those lovely sounds to Kolivan instead.’
The sound Keith made was an indescribable garble of syllables, but at least he got a moment to recover and watch Antok offer a mnenga to Kolivan. For the short time it took for Kolivan to eat the thing, eyes locked with Antok’s the whole time, Keith felt like they’d totally forgotten he was in the room - but that was fine, because it was one of the hottest displays he’d ever seen and he could have watched it for hours, if not for the fact he was getting uncomfortably hard. Why had he worn these tight jeans? They were a horrible idea.
‘Is it bad table manners if we take the last two to bed with us?’ he croaked.
The alphas laughed. ‘Absolutely appalling,’ Antok assured him.
‘I don’t see why that should stop us doing it anyway,’ said Kolivan.
‘Good.’ Keith stood up and grabbed the plate. ‘Then lead the way, ‘cause it’s my turn and I really wanna lick this off your scent glands.’
Kolivan’s eyes widened briefly and he laughed again. ‘We’ve started a fire, Antok.’
‘Clearly,’ said Antok, coming round the table to offer his arm. ‘Well, I don’t know about you, but I intend to stoke it. You can sit there gaping at the dirty dishes if you want.’
Then he let Keith out, followed almost immediately by the clatter of a chair being pushed back and an indignant, ‘Antok!’
The bed was nowhere near as big as the one in Keith’s room - of course it wasn’t, it wasn’t expected to accommodate six people and a space wolf - but it looked just as comfortable, although it was stretching the definition of ‘bed’ slightly. It was a large, heavily padded pit set into the floor, full of massive pillows and quilts.
Keith set the plate down on the nightstand - which did have a purpose on a bed this size - and regarded it. ‘Huh. It’s a nest.’
‘Yes,’ said Antok. ‘It’s… helpful, on the bad nights.’
‘Oh.’ Keith nodded and hastily changed the subject. ‘It looks really fucking comfortable, which these jeans really are not. And I know it’s interrupting the cake ritual but all of us are wearing way too many clothes, especially me, and I might need help.’
‘What kind of alpha would I be if I left my omega in such distress,’ said Kolivan, going down on one knee to open Keith’s fly and peel his jeans down past his hips. ‘Antok, assist me here, I believe he has put this garment on with a vacuum-forming machine.’
‘Yeah, sorry, I thought they might look nice, I didn’t think about actually getting them off…’
Antok laughed and sat down behind Keith, on the edge of the pit, and pulled him down into his lap so that Kolivan could ease the regrettable jeans down his legs and off. ‘They look exquisite, perhaps even more so than the rest of your clothes but possibly next time you should wear something looser.’ He leaned close to Keith’s ear, his breath hot on his neck, and purred, ‘Or we could simply cut it off. I notice that wasn’t the only tight garment you wore today.’
Keith took a shuddering breath and leaned back on Antok’s shoulder. ‘Fuck.’
‘Just a moment,’ said Kolivan. ‘Antok, aren’t you seeing this?’ He traced a finger up the inside of Keith’s thigh, barely dipped it between his folds and still it came away dripping, plenty to smear up his twitching shaft. ‘I like you in just the shirt, for now.’
‘It’s a very pretty picture from here, too,’ said Antok.
Keith swallowed hard. ‘I… OK. Hey, Kol, do I get to feed you that mnenga now?’
‘In a manner of speaking,’ replied Kolivan, taking the pastry himself, breaking it in two and then smearing the mess liberally over Keith’s thighs. Keith made a little bitten-off whimper and grabbed for Antok’s hand, but Kolivan ignored him, bending his head to clean up the sauce and broken pastry in broad licks and sucks and little nibbles of his terrifying fangs. Keith was rapidly noisy and begging, spreading his legs wider to let Kolivan in - and Kolivan answered him, one hand under his knee, the other palm flat on his stomach under the t-shirt as he swiped his tongue up Keith’s hot, soaking folds, again and again, but stopping short of touching his cock.
‘Kolivan - Kol, please, you gotta, I gotta…’ begged Keith, writhing and bucking, trying to get more sensation but held firmly in place by Kolivan’s hand on his stomach.
And then Kolivan’s gaze caught his own, and then Antok’s - and Antok’s huge hand enveloped his cock, not moving, but giving him something to pump into as Kolivan started to thrust his tongue into Keith’s hole. By now he was almost- no, he was crying, the fire was surging through him higher and higher and just when he thought it would burn him up he came, and for a moment his thoughts smeared across reality, reduced to registering the insane sensation in his own body.
When he came back to himself, panting hard, he was in the nest properly, with Antok on one side and Kolivan on the other, and Kolivan looked more smug than Keith had ever seen him. Keith gave him a half-hearted Look and said, ‘I bet you think you’re very clever.’
‘I don’t know about that. I just made my omega cry with pleasure, though. I’m entitled to feel a little proud of myself.’
‘When you’re sufficiently recovered, it will be my turn,’ said Antok against the back of his neck, and Keith realised he was holding the plate.
‘Fuck,’ he whispered. ‘Okay. Gimme a second to catch my breath.’
‘Anything you want,’ replied Antok, nuzzling at the sweaty black curls.
It was hard to think for a moment, but finally his shattered thoughts arranged themselves enough for him to lean over and steal the plate out of Antok’s hand. ‘You’re both too dressed. That sweater’s nice on you but I wanna see what’s underneath.’
Behind him, Kolivan gave a low chuckle that was hardly even a sound. ‘Oh, just you wait. Show him, Antok.’
‘Don’t think you’re getting away with it either,’ snapped Keith over his shoulder, but for now he was watching Antok peel the fluffy sweater off over his head, to reveal underneath a loose black halter top that was so minimal as to be barely worthy of the title of garment. It was as if someone had attached tapes to a vaguely triangular cut-out of clinging fabric and called it a day, it sagged in the front and bagged around the sides, and only existed at all in the back to tie around Antok’s neck and ribcage.
‘You’re staring,’ said Antok gently.
‘No wonder,’ murmured Kolivan in Keith’s ear. ‘I take it you like it?’
Keith nodded. ‘You look great, Antok. Damn. Did you wear that for me? Wow.’
‘Actually I wore it for Kolivan, but I’m very glad you have similar tastes,’ said Antok, hooking his thumbs in the waistband of his pants - which were slung low enough on his hips that they could barely stand the extra pressure.
Keith’s eyes flicked down to where Antok’s fur thickened and grew paler under his ribs and, further down, and reached out to run his fingers through the silky lavender strands, making the stomach beneath twitch. ‘Feed me,’ he breathed.
Antok glanced at Kolivan, but Kolivan was watching with an appraising eye, chewing softly at his lip with one fang. ‘Do what he said he wanted,’ he said, not taking his eyes off the stretch of chest that the halter top was no use at all at hiding. ‘Make him eat it off your scent glands.’
‘Of course.’ Antok smiled at Keith, who was now petting the fur just under the hem of the top. ‘Keith? I can’t do this unless you sit up. Kolivan, I may need you to hold my hair out of the way for this.’
‘After all that trouble you went to putting it up,’ said Kolivan teasingly, but he came and sat down behind Antok, scooping his hair off his neck and pressing a kiss to the nape, where a primary bite would go.
‘I knew it would come down again,’ replied Antok, a little breathlessly. ‘Keith?’
‘Coming.’ Keith sat up and then, after a moment’s thought, climbed into Antok’s lap and sat straddling his thighs. ‘There, now I can reach your neck. Tip your head for me, big guy.’
Antok tipped his head to the side, shivering a little as Kolivan carefully stroked his hair away from his scent gland. Keith broke the mnenga in half - or that was the idea. The pastry was more crumbly than he expected and his thumb went through the case, so he shrugged, sucked his thumb clean and smeared Antok’s throat liberally with sauce. When it was getting hard to hold he put the rest back on the plate and turned his attention back to Antok, to licking the strong, firm column of his throat, tasting the sweet-tangy sauce and under it, the richness of Antok’s scent, rising to fill his sinuses.
Today, though, it was… different. Keith pressed the flat of his tongue against the gland and licked, trying to get rid of the mnenga sauce taste to identify what was new. Metal, scar lotion, ozone, luxite, none of these were new scents at all, or unique to Antok. Keith buried his face in the soft spot behind Antok’s ear and inhaled deeply.
Antok’s shuddering sigh snapped him out of his reverie and he looked up to see Kolivan smiling softly at him, and Antok boneless and relaxed in his arms.
‘Fuck. Er. Sorry.’
‘Don’t apologise,’ said Kolivan. ‘He’s clearly having a wonderful time. Did you find what you were looking for?’
‘Not… exactly.’ Keith grabbed and ate the last of the mnenga, which wasn’t really protocol but he was done with sugar and games. He wanted reality. ‘He’s got… some kind of scent I’ve never… smelled? Before? Only I kind of tasted it?’
‘Then you’re learning his real scent. That’s good - so much of what makes our scents is artificial, and coloured by our day-to-day encounters. And Antok is so used to hiding.’ Kolivan glanced at Antok with undeniable fondness in his eyes. ‘Antok - wake, now. Do you want to miss everything?’
Antok’s contented smile broadened. ‘I’m awake,’ he said, and then he was sitting up, to pick the shattered remains of the last mnenga off the plate and smear it over Keith’s waiting lips. Keith opened his mouth immediately to lick his fingers clean, then Antok leaned in and kissed him, tasting of tangy sauce and sweet sugar, arms warm and firm around his back. Keith pushed his hands up Antok’s chest, under the flimsy black top - the left side was all smooth scar tissue and Antok barely responded, but the right side was soft fur. Antok shivered when it was pushed against the grain, and made a soft little sound in the back of hs throat when Keith found his nipple and flicked it with his thumb.
They sat back, breathing heavily, and Antok said softly, ‘So, dare I ask, what do you want to do now?’
Keith licked his lips, looked from Antok to Kolivan and said decisively, ‘We’re still wearing too many clothes, I wanna get both of you naked and then I want to watch you fuck.’
Kolivan and Antok exchanged startled glances, and Kolivan said, ‘Of course, anything you want, but… don’t you want to join in?’
‘Later,’ said Keith, already sitting up and peeling his t-shirt up and over his head. ‘I wanna see how you do it. See what you like. Also I like watching you together, it’s hot as hell.’
Kolivan let out a bark of laughter. ‘Well, in that case, who am I to argue?’ He kissed Keith’s scent gland, then leaned forward over his shoulder to kiss Antok, pushing Keith forward into Antok’s embrace.
Antok whined into the kiss, reaching over and grabbing a handful of Kolivan’s hair to anchor him - crushed between them like this, Keith could feel Antok’s massive erection, hard against his much smaller one, and he couldn’t resist grinding down. Both galra groaned and the kiss broke.
‘Oh, you do like it, hm?’ said Kolivan, grinding up against Keith’s backside.
‘Mm-hm,’ Keith nodded. ‘It’s pretty overwhelming. Fuck, why are you both wearing pants?’
‘A very good question,’ purred Antok in his ear. ‘But I fear I’ll have to remove you from my lap to be rid of mine.’ He put his hands under Keith’s thighs, lifted him up and placed him in Kolivan’s lap. ‘There, you take care of him for a moment.’
‘Keep the top on,’ said Kolivan through a mouthful of Keith’s hair.
Antok smirked, and stretched, showing how the flimsy fabric swayed out over his chest, hiding nothing and revealing virtually everything. Even the bare swathe of pale scar tissue meant nothing in the face of Kolivan’s obvious appreciation, and Antok met his gaze and drank it all in. Keith was pretty certain he was arching his back on purpose as he untied his pants, and he honestly wasn’t about to complain - this new Antok, showing off like he knew he was gorgeous, was a novelty he didn’t want to give up.
And then Antok was gloriously nude, except for the scrap of black fabric barely covering his chest, and leaning over to kiss Kolivan over Keith’s head. Kolivan groaned into Antok’s mouth, one hand cupping the back of his head, and trapped between the two of them, their scents overpowering, Keith couldn’t help the whine that escaped from between his teeth. He wanted to touch, he reached up and placed a hand on Antok’s hip and Antok instantly ground down against him.
The kiss broke into wet, breathless laughter. ‘You’d better give him back so you can undress and we can all play, Alpha,’ murmured Antok.
‘Take him then, Alpha,’ replied Kolivan, pushing both Keith and Antok over backwards and standing so he could strip. Whereas the others had discarded their clothing in all directions, Kolivan folded his neatly and placed it over a chair outside the nest.
Keith watched him for a minute and then said to Antok, ‘I don’t know what I expected.’
‘It’s a sign that we have driven him as wild as we have that he isn’t folding our clothes too.’
But despite their impatience, Kolivan was back, trapping Keith between himself and Antok, kissing Keith briefly on the way to a kiss that sounded like a battle more than anything else, both alphas growling and snarling and clashing their teeth in their rising frenzy. It was contagious and Keith tried to get a hand around his cock, but it was trapped against Kolivan’s stomach - rutting against the Blade leader didn’t give the relief he needed and Keith was sobbing with desire, gnawing hopelessly on Kolivan’s shoulder, within minutes.
And then suddenly both of them focussed on him with the intensity of the sun through a magnifying glass from the point of view of a single ant.
Notes:
Sorry to break the scene there! I wanted to give you a chapter before summer ended entirely.
This one has been a LONG time coming, both because of general world events and also because I had a resergence of last year's eye nastiness and was literally blind for two weeks. So I basically have to accept that I have a scary chronic eye issue that I need to keep on top of, but also that means I can have a full-time live-in carer, which I've actually wanted for years. This also means one of my closest friends gets a job taking care of me and a place to live and we have much more buying power as we look for a new place... which might also slow things down. Life, huh?
Anyway, thanks for sticking with me, I promise I'm not dropping this, I love you all. You're the best!

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