Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

You bit your lip to stifle another groan. Everything hurt and you were feeling a bit dizzy, but mostly, you were feeling confused.

You would have never, ever, imagined that you’d end up in Daryl’s arms…you hadn’t even shaken hands with the guy, or had even thought you would. You were starting to know him a little bit better, if you might call it so, during your search for Sophia, but still, being carried by him bridal style was something that hadn’t crossed your mind until that moment.

Sure, it was because you were injured and couldn’t walk by yourself, but your current situation was surprising anyway, But what was he going to do, just leave you there to be eaten? Daryl wasn’t like that. You might have thought it, maybe, back in the quarry, before you really knew anything about it, but not anymore.

“I ain’t taking you with me anymore” Daryl grumbled.

“I don’t think I’m going anywhere anytime soon, Daryl…”

“It hurts too bad?” He looked at you, it was just a second, but you wondered if he actually looked worried.

“I’ll live.”

You had been searching for Sophia with Daryl once again. Since the little girl disappeared and Daryl began his search, you had been joining him. You worried about the little girl, of course, but you also didn’t know what else to do with yourself. It wasn’t like you had any special and useful ability, or actual friends in the group, you had lost everyone already. But it was better than being alone, and they were nice. And so, you decided that even though you couldn’t track, you might do something useful by looking for Sophia, even though, honestly, you weren’t as confident as Daryl in finding her alive. You were mentally preparing yourself to find a corpse, either walking or not.

At least, until today, when Daryl found a cabin and you saw a closet in which someone the size of a kid could have been hiding and some empty cans of food. Someone had been there. Could be Sophia, or could be someone else. But even if it was someone else, that person might need your help anyway.

Then, you had suggested you split. At this moment, you didn’t know why you had done it, if you were trying to prove a point or what, but you were very much regretting it. Daryl had marked in a map the areas close to the cabin in which he thought Sophia might be, and so you had suggested splitting to cover more ground. Daryl hadn’t been very sure, though, but you had tried to appear confident, and so finally you had parted ways, which had been a mistake on your side. It seemed Daryl hadn’t gone too far from you, though, luckily for you.

You had ended up face to face with a group of walkers. You had put down a couple before, but always at Daryl’s side, watching how he did it, never alone. They were too many for you anyway, you knew it, and so not knowing what else to do, you ran. You had run faster than ever in your life, going downhill, but before you could get far enough from the walkers, you had tripped on a root and fallen down, rolling down a few meters before stopping. You had some scrapes, your head hurt, but the worst was how your tailbone hurt pretty bad, and your ankle shot waves of pain through you every time you tried to move it. No, the worst was how you could see the walkers approaching you.

You had tried to stand up, but when you’d tried to walk, the pain in your ankle had made you cry out and feel dizzy, and you had ended up on the ground again. You had cried for help, even if you were pretty sure there was no one around. But then Daryl had showed up out of nowhere, shooting at the walkers, and then just putting them down by knife with that skill that you didn’t know how he could have, as if he’d been putting down walkers all his life, as if those things were usual pests in his town before they roamed the whole world.

Then, he had approached you. You’d been sure he was going to start yelling at you for having messed the search, but he hadn’t. He had yelled at you, yes, but about you wanting to go alone when you couldn’t protect yourself, about you being an idiot, about almost, getting bitten, and so on and so on.

You had been scared, more than scared, you were hurting, you felt like an idiot indeed, and Daryl was angry and was yelling at you…so you had begun crying. It had been embarrassing, you had felt like even more of an idiot, you had been sure Daryl was going to yell even more at you, but he hadn’t.

He had stopped and he had looked at you in shock, in horror even, seeming like he didn’t know what to do, awkward as hell. He had stood there, looking at you while you hid your face in embarrassment, and then he had approached you. He hadn’t yelled more, in fact, he’d checked you and your injuries, even though he seemed beyond awkward.

He had assured you that you had nothing broken, and you had to trust him even though your tailbone hurt, and your ankle burned like hell. You’d tried again, but couldn’t walk, almost passing out when you put weight on your ankle, and so Daryl had scooped you up into his arms. It had more than surprised you, but you were grateful nonetheless. When your body jerked as he walked, pain shot through you, but it was way better than having to walk like that…and you couldn’t deny it, there was something comforting in being held like that, even if it was for practical reasons.

Daryl had been carrying you for a while now and you knew he was getting tired, even though he wasn’t saying anything. He was breathing harder and his arms were starting to shake a bit. He had strong arms, you knew…you had actually checked his arms subtly one or two, or five times before, but it wasn’t like you weighed nothing, he’d to get tired, strong arms or not.

“I could try to walk now, maybe…” You offered.

“Are you really this idiot?” Daryl retorted and you tried not to take offense, he was harsh like that but by now you had found that half of the time he didn’t mean anything bad, he just had that instinct of biting back.

“No, but you’re tired of having to carry me.”

Daryl didn’t say anything, but after walking some meters more, he carefully lowered you to the ground. You winced a bit as your tailbone hit the ground, and you wiggled until you found a way in which it didn’t hurt too much, half sitting half lying, trying to not bother your ankle either, though all your body hurt.

Daryl sat down too and he took a bottle of water out of his bag. After taking a sip he passed it to you, and you took a grateful sip. Once the bottle was back in his bag, he reached out to examine your ankle once more. Pain shot through you when he touched it, making you dizzy, and you had to stop yourself from kicking Daryl with your other leg and push him away.

“You sure it’s not broken?” You asked in concern.

“No, but you strained it or something.”

“And the tailbone?” That really had you worried.

“Definitely not broken, just bruised.”

“Okay…” It was reassuring, though you weren’t very sure as for why you trusted Daryl was right, you just did.

“You’re an idiot.”

“I know…” You murmured.

“Why you wanted to go alone if you couldn’t fight walkers?”

“I could have fought one…two maybe…” You protested weakly. “Just…wanted to be useful…didn’t want to be a burden for you…to the search.” You shrugged, wincing at how it made your body hurt, and you looked down as you tried not to cry again. “But I messed everything. I’m sorry, Daryl.” You hadn’t really checked the area and now Daryl’d lose that day because he had to carry you back.

“I’ll go back to the cabin tomorrow, if Sophia is out there, is the only safe place she has, she could go back,” Daryl said, and you didn’t know if it was an attempt to make you feel better, even though you didn’t expect it, or if he was just thinking aloud. “Didn’t find tracks or nothing around that could be from her, though…” He did look thoughtful, concerned even. He was always so hopeful about finding Sophia, you didn’t like to see him seemingly doubting like that.

“’ Cause you didn’t have time, you had to save my ass. Thank you, by the way…for not being far and…well yeah, for saving my life…” You shrugged, blushing. “And for being helping me now. Thank you, Daryl.” You had just realized you hadn’t actually thanked him.

Daryl looked at you, but didn’t say anything. “Let’s keep going.” He carefully picked you up again and you groaned in pain.

“It hurts every time you move…” You whined.

“Would you rather crawl?” Daryl retorted and you had to remind yourself again that probably he didn’t mean anything bad, it was just the way he was, he tended to snap like that, and so you said nothing, just held onto him and tried not to let dizziness overcame you.

*

Back on the farm, you were honestly surprised to see some of the people from your group looking truly concerned about you. They were nice most of the time, sure, but you didn’t really have friends, so you hadn’t expected it, but it was heartwarming, helping you feel better…maybe you weren’t that alone. Mostly, though, they seemed confused about the image of Daryl carrying you. Well, you were too, but what was the man supposed to do, leave you in the woods?

Hershel checked you, and much to your relief, he confirmed that you didn’t have anything broken, you were just bruised and your ankle was sprained, you had to rest it, and your tailbone too, so you’d have to stay in bed for some days. Daryl had carried you to the other spare bedroom in the main floor of the house, next to the one in which Carl was recovering, and left you on the bed, watching while Hershel checked you, and part of you was glad he was there, instead of you and Hershel alone, when you were feeling weak and you still didn’t know the man that well yet, and he didn’t seem that thrilled to have you in his land, though he was acting fairly professional.

He gave you some more than welcomed painkillers and he bandaged your ankle properly before leaving you alone, and you wiggled in the bed, trying to find a position than didn’t bother your tailbone neither your ankle, half lying on your side and snuggling a pillow to you. Daryl was still there, looking at you.

“You good?” He asked.

“Yeah.” Just knowing that he was right and that Hershel had said you’d be okay was enough for your peace of mind, besides you had a fluffy bed and pillow for the first time in months, safe walls and all, you had to look at the positive side, you guessed. “Painkillers are starting to kick in.” Daryl just nodded and turned around to leave the room. “Daryl, wait.” You called for him and he stopped, looking at you over his shoulder. “Thank you.”

Daryl just nodded again and left the room.

*

You didn’t see Daryl again after late afternoon the next day, and the sight was quite a shock. You had been bored all day, but boredom was welcomed these days, lying in bed and reading a book that Maggie had lent you, when you had heard a shot outside. You had tried to get up and go to the window, scared out of your mind, but you had almost fallen to the floor. There was no other shot, so you hoped everything was okay, maybe a single walker had wandered too close or something like that, and you limped back to the bed.

“Can someone tell me what’s going on? It’s everything okay?” You yelled but there was no answer, and suddenly Rick and Shane were rushing into the room, carrying an unconscious and bloodied up Daryl, Hershel following them.

“Oh my god, what happened? Is he okay?!” The sight of Daryl like that scared you but he seemed to be alive, he was groaning and his eyes opened when they placed him on the bed next to you, looking clouded, before they closed again.

For what you could gather listening to Hershel working, something seemed to have gone through Daryl’s side, and arrow, according to Daryl’s whimpers and grunts as Hershel stitched him up, and according to Daryl’s grunts too, the bitch had shot him but only grazed the side of his head. The bitch was Andrea, and you were lost, wondering what the hell was going on. At the very least, it seemed to have been a mistake, not that your group had decided to start shooting at each other.

After some disinfectant, stitches, and bandages, Hershel declared Daryl good enough, though he’d have to rest. Daryl seemed to be in pain, despite the painkillers, but he didn’t seem unconscious anymore, as if he were fighting to be awake. He was grunting and fighting to sit up, looking at Rick and reaching out for something you couldn’t see.

“The doll,” he mumbled and Rick nodded, sitting down on the bed.

“Yeah, I saw it, I saw it. It’s Sophia’s, yeah?” Rick asked and Daryl nodded.

“You found her?” You asked. It didn’t make sense, though, it Sophia were back you’d have heard of it, people would be celebrating…maybe Daryl had found her right before getting hurt? But no, Daryl wouldn’t leave her no matter what. Maybe…maybe he had found her dead…

“Just the doll,” Shane answered for Daryl.

“She gotta be close,” Daryl said weakly, reaching out again. “Map.” Rick took the map and placed it on top of the bed, next to Daryl, and he pointed at it. “Here, found it here.”

“Okay, okay.” Rick nodded, marking the spot. “The sun will go down soon, I can’t go out now, but I’ll check it first thing in the morning.”

It didn’t seem enough for Daryl, but he was too weak to do anything else, falling back onto the bed with a grunt. Rick and Shane didn’t say anything else and they left, leaving you and Daryl alone, and closing the door behind them.

Well, damn, this was awkward. Daryl turned his head to look at you, frowning, his eyes clouded, and opening his mouth as if to say something, but then he was closing it again, his eyes closing tight as if his head hurt. He grunted, shaking his head, which just seemed to make it worse. You saw him trying and failing to keep his eyes open, and then he was falling unconscious.

Now that he was out, you looked him down…he really looked like hell. Besides the bandages, his body was covered in fresh bruises and cuts, and you wondered what the hell had happened to him. There were some faint scars on his chest too, but those weren’t recent, or didn’t look like so.

You realized, although it had been kind of obvious since you were just thinking about his bruises and scars, that he didn’t have his shirt on, and you found yourself staring at the arms, shoulders, and part of his chest that the sheet wasn’t covering. You had been thinking about his strong arms that morning, and there you had them in full display, with the wide shoulders and barreled chest and…and yeah, you were a total pervert. This shit wasn’t right. He was lying unconscious, in pain, severely hurt, and you were ogling him. You blushed and looked away quickly.

You realized, too, that you were both in the same bed. It had been kind of obvious, too, and it made you blush even more. It was clear that Daryl needed to rest in bed, though, and you couldn’t move much either, and you were told to lay low for a couple of days more at least. There was no other bedroom on the main floor, so you guessed it kind of made sense that you two were put in the same bed, since you both needed it.

Still, it was awkward as hell. Maybe you could try and limp to a sofa or something, Daryl looked like he needed the bed way more than you, but when you moved your ankle and tailbone complained painfully, so you decided to stop trying for now.

A couple of hours passed while Daryl was still out, and the sun began to go down. You had been reading and so you turned on the nightstand lamp, hoping it wouldn’t bother Daryl, to keep reading. Honestly, you kept reading the same two pages again and again, unable to focus, thinking on Daryl lying next to you.

You didn’t know if it was the light or if Daryl had slept enough, but you heard him groaning and when you looked at him he was frowning, stirring awake and trying to blink his eyes open. His eyes landed on you and he frowned again, looking around before looking back at you, and then he tried to move further away from you, grunting in pain as he did so.

Yeah, you understood. Awkward as hell.

“Seems like this is the only free bed downstairs and we’re both bedridden…” You said, but Daryl still seemed as awkward as you, or more, frowning at you, his face flushed and seeming ready to storm away if it weren’t because he had stitches on his side. “It’s okay, you need it more than me, I’ll go sit down on the sofa.” You tried to move, stifling a groan as you rubbed your tailbone on the bed the wrong way.

“You’re an idiot.” Third time in a day, you were going to start to take offense. “You can’t walk.”

“I can limp…” It hurt, though, and you weren’t sure you could limp your way to the sofa by yourself. “You aren’t looking that healthy either, you know.”

“I’m good,” Daryl grumbled. He tried to get up, you didn’t know if to go to the sofa himself, but it seemed like so, and he grunted and groaned in pain but didn’t stop trying.

“Daryl, stop. Stop!” You repeated when he still tried to move. “You have stitches, you were shot at, an arrow went through your side. You need to lie down and rest. Stop.” It was probably the pain and not your words what made Daryl stop, landing back on the pillow with another grunt. “The bed is big enough…I know it’s super awkward, but we could both at least spend this night resting here, it could make us some good.

Daryl wasn’t saying anything but he wasn’t trying to move away either, so you guessed it was a yes. You moved further away from him, trying to give him space, and Daryl went to turn onto his side, his back to you, grunting as it made him press on his wound. He seemed to think it better, and he began to try to sit up again, reaching towards a chair where his shirt was, it was close to the foot of the bed but far from his reach, grunting in pain as he tried to grab it.

You had caught a glimpse of his back when he’d moved, and the faint scars you had seen on his chest were nothing compared to the ones on his back, he had more there, deeper and longer. You guessed maybe he wasn’t comfortable with you seeing him without his shirt on and so you sat up too, groaning at the pain in your tailbone. “Wait, let me…” You didn’t have stitches, after all. Still, you groaned in pain as you shifted towards the foot of the bed, falling onto your side, and you couldn’t help your chuckle. “Damn…we’re useless, aren’t we…”

Daryl snorted and when you looked at him he was smirking and nodding, much to your surprise. You tried again but couldn’t, and you rolled back to your spot on the bed, complaining and groaning as you did so. Daryl tried again and clutched his wounded side as he let out a muffled whimper, and you were afraid he had really hurt himself that time, so you were glad when he stopped trying, falling back onto the bed, seeming annoyed.

He began tugging at the sheets, trying to cover himself more, and without a word, you reached out to help him, hoping that at least it’d help him be a bit more at ease. Once his back and chest were covered as he wanted it, he turned onto his side, his back to you, grunting as he did so, shifting as he tried to put less pressure on the wound.

“Hurts?” You asked quietly.

“Yeah.” He admitted.

“What happened to you?”

“I was an idiot like you.”

“Stop calling me that!” You half complained, and you couldn’t help your smile when you saw him smirking…maybe he didn’t think you were an idiot, maybe he was just…Daryl.

“The horse got scared and threw me, I fell down a ravine, impaled myself with my own arrow, passed out, woke up to a walker gnawing my shoe,” Daryl retold, much to your horror. “Pulled out the arrow, killed the walkers, climbed back up, came back, bitch shot me.”

“Shit Daryl…”

“Yeah…shit of a day…” He groaned, turning to lie onto his other side, the one that wasn’t hurt, though that meant he had to face you. You felt that it made him uncomfortable and so you rolled onto your back, looking at the ceiling.

“I’m glad you’re okay.”

“You call this okay?” Daryl grumbled.

“Alive, I mean.” You shrugged, and Daryl just hummed.

You turned onto your side, your back to Daryl. He was covered with the sheet but had pushed the duvet off, and you tugged at it, wrapping it around you.

“Are you cold?”

“A bit…”

“How can you be cold?” You looked at Daryl over your shoulder and he was frowning at you. You knew the day was hot, but still, you were feeling a bit cold, lying there.

“I don’t know…but I’m cold a lot…like my blood isn’t warm or something.” You snorted.

“Could be a way to deceive walkers.” Daryl joked back, and you turned onto your back again, groaning, to look at him. He was facing the ceiling, eyes closed, but you saw him smirking.

“Well…if it is, it hasn’t worked for now.”

“Hmm…better not test it again then.”

Chapter Text

You were still looking at the ceiling in silence, and so was Daryl. The only change had been when Carol had come to bring you both dinner. She had also told Daryl that he was a good man, kissed his forehead even, as if she weren’t afraid of him snapping. It made Daryl awkward, but you also though he was moved, more than what you could have thought. You had said nothing, hadn’t looked at him, trying not to make him even more awkward, but you were starting to get bored.

“Do you want me to turn off the light?” You asked.

“I don’t care.”

“We should sleep.” You decided to turn it off, maybe in the darkness you’d feel less awkward. You could hope…. At the very least, you knew you had to sleep, and so you began to wiggle, trying to get comfortable without your ankle and tailbone hurting too much. While you moved, you bumped Daryl’s bare feet with yours without meaning too.

“Shit, woman!”

“I’m sorry!” You pulled away quickly, hoping he wouldn’t freak out.

“You have ice in your feet or what?” Oh…so that was the reason why he’d yelped, not just you touching him.

“No…or maybe yes, I don’t know.” You chuckled awkwardly. “They are always cold, sometimes in winter they’re so cold that they hurt.” You explained while you rubbed your feet together, trying to warm them. “Told you, I’m always cold…” It was a bit embarrassing. While camping outside, you slept inside your sleeping bag and also with a thin blanket covering you, no matter it was still summer.

“Want me to get you a blanket or something?” Daryl offered, and even though he sounded awkward, it surprised you in a good way.

“No…no, thanks, you shouldn’t move and I’m good with the duvet.”

“Okay…” You heard him moving as if trying to find a comfortable position to sleep, and you did the same, closing your eyes and trying to sleep.

*

You woke up in pain in the middle of the night when your bad ankle got caught in the sheet. You were about to curse aloud and kick the sheet with your good foot when you remembered that Daryl was sleeping next to you. You stopped moving, hoping you hadn’t awaken him up, but you heard his steady breath.

You couldn’t help but notice the warmth radiating from him. Damn, wasn’t it tempting to crawl closer to it…You weren’t really cold, but when you woke up at night, you were always a bit chilly, and Daryl’s warmth was luring you close. Besides, it felt comforting too… But you were sure Daryl’d freak out if he woke up with you curled up to him, or even just too close to him.

Still, as you tried to sleep, his warmth was just too tempting, and you couldn’t help yourself from scooting closer. You didn’t touch him, though, you weren’t crazy, and you left space between you two, but you were close enough so the body heat that he was emanating would warm you, and between that, the comfort that it brought, and the sound of his steady breath, soon you had fallen back asleep.

The next time you woke up was to Daryl grunting in pain as he moved, waking up. You realized that you had rolled onto your side and you were facing him, since he was sleeping on his good side. You weren’t touching him, but you were close, and you didn’t know if he was going to be angry or not, but it was awkward anyway, and so you closed your eyes before he opened his, trying to pretend that you were still asleep. Maybe he’d think you had rolled closer while you slept.

You felt Daryl tensing and you knew he had noticed how close you were. You thought he might wake you up, or even just push you away, but he didn’t. You wondered if maybe he wanted to let you sleep, or maybe he was afraid of hurting you if he pushed you to your side? It’d be actually pretty nice from him. Still, you could feel him all stiff, and awkward, and almost not breathing, and you took pity, forcing yourself to roll away from his warmth, pretending to be waking up now.

“Good morning.” You greeted and Daryl just grunted, trying to get up. “Where you going?”

“To look for Sophia.” You had assumed he was trying to go to the bathroom or something, you were waiting for Maggie to come and help you limp there, but yes, of course, Daryl wanted to go and keep searching.

“Daryl, you can’t. Daryl, stop.” You reached to grab his arm when he was about to get up, and if looks could kill, you’d be dead. “You’re hurt, you almost died. You have to rest.” He just scoffed, yanking his arm free. “At least wait until Hershel comes to check on us, he’ll tell you how you are doing.” Daryl scoffed, trying to get up but he whimpered as he clutched his side, and he fell down onto the bed again, seeming annoyed. You knew you should leave him alone, and still… “You told Rick where the doll was, he’s going to look for Sophia.”

“Yeah, sure.” Daryl scoffed again. “He doesn’t know shit about tracking anyway.”

You didn’t know what to say, and so you say nothing, awkward silence filling the room until Hershel came to check on you both. He didn’t have good news, though you were better than Daryl. He was told to stay in bed and rest, and when Daryl snapped at Hershel, the vet told him to leave if he wanted but not to come back when his stitches ripped.

Daryl was so annoyed that you decided not to say anything about it…or about anything else. You feared Daryl might not listen to Hershel and try to go searching for Sophia by himself, but if he had that in mind, it changed when he tried to walk. He had gotten up, putting on his shirt and heading outside the room, to the bathroom you thought, grunting and limping. When he came back he looked worse, seeming dizzy and in pain, his face clammy and pale, breathing hard as he clutched his side, groaning, until he let himself fall onto the bed.

“Hey, you okay?” You asked in concern and Daryl didn’t say anything, throwing one of his arms over his eyes. “Do you want me to ask Hershel for more pain killers?” Daryl shook his head. “Daryl, you’re looking-”

“I’m fine!” He snapped.

“Okay…” You shook your head. “You know, I had a girlfriend who broke an arm and she was telling everyone she was fine until she moved it and passed out.” You felt like Daryl was like that too, damn stubborn, he wouldn’t just accept that he had to rest. “However I dated a guy that if he sneezed he was sure he’d caught something and he’d die.” You snorted.

Daryl removed the arm from his face to glance at you. “You dated boys and girls?”

“You got a problem with it?” You snapped, defensive, you couldn’t help it.

“Was just asking…” Daryl muttered, closing his eyes again as he winced.

It didn’t seem he had a problem, though, and so you relaxed, but now you felt like asking him about it. You knew it’d probably end up with him kicking you off the bed, though, and so you didn’t.

However, as hours passed and you grow more and more bored, not able to focus on a book with Daryl lying next to you, you found yourself sharing little things about your life before, nothing important, but at least it was better than the awkward silence. You thought Daryl wasn’t paying attention, though at least he didn’t seem annoyed by your chat. Then, you realized he was indeed listening, as he hummed at your words here and there, offering even a couple of words sometimes. He didn’t tell you anything about him or his life before, and you didn’t ask. He did tell you, though, by the end of the day, some stuff about tracking and hunting, much to your surprise.

All in all, it didn’t feel like such a bad day, bedridden or not. It was still awkward, sure, but you felt you had shared more with Daryl in those hours than in all the days going out with him, even if he hadn’t talked that much.

That night, as you tried to sleep, you felt once again Daryl’s warmth coming from his side of the bed, oh so tempting. Once you were sure he was asleep, you scooted closer, making sure to leave some space between you two but enjoying his comforting warmth, and in the morning, you rolled away from him, pretending to be asleep again.

That was the last time you were able to enjoy Daryl’s warmth for a while. The next day, he decided he was good enough to leave the bed. You did the same, walking with a cane that Hershel lent you, and he assured that in a couple of days you’d be walking by yourself. That night, as you curled up alone in your sleeping bag, you had to admit you kind of missed Daryl’s company, and his warmth.

*

The Greene’s farm had fallen under an endless sea of walkers. You had never been more terrified in your life. People had died, and you had been sure you were going to be one of them, but somehow, you had survived. A couple of days later and you still were camping in the woods, not a roof over your heads, no tents or anything.

Autumn was there, the weather wasn’t mild anymore, and you were frozen. On top of everything, your period had come, while you were in the middle of nowhere, no running water. You were feeling like shit and you were feeling like crying, but mostly, you were so cold, wrapped in your coat, that you couldn’t stop shivering hard, no matter you were sat down next to the campfire.

You glanced at Daryl, sat down near the fire. Everyone was trying to sleep, besides Rick who was taking watch, and Daryl, who was sat down cross-legged, crossbow on his knee, looking around. You couldn’t help but think back to the couple of nights on which you shared a bed with him. You were sure that, being next to him, probably you wouldn’t be that cold…

You were sad, too, and feeling lonely as ever, in a group of people that, no matter were nice to you, weren’t friends, or family. You felt like you had no one. Daryl might be the person with whom you had spent more time with, and that wasn’t much to begin with, you didn’t even think he’d consider you his friend.

But you were so, so cold, and you were feeling so, so awful…You got up and walked to Daryl. He looked at you as if he thought you wanted something, but you just sit down next to him, closer than you had dared to while you were lying together in bed. His brow furrowed as he looked at you, seeming taken aback, and you couldn’t miss how he scooted slightly away from you.

Maybe you were over-reacting, but you took it bad, feeling like he couldn’t bear to be close to you, while everyone was curled up together, sleeping, they had friends, they had families, and there you were, cold and alone. And Daryl didn’t want to be near you. Were you that horrible?

You felt tears in your eyes and you were embarrassed of Daryl seeing them, so you got up, walking away from the group, sitting down alone and cold, away from them. You hadn’t been there for even a minute when you heard Daryl’s voice.

“The fuck you doing here alone?” You didn’t reply, sniffing, hiding your face from him in embarrassment. “The hell are you crying for?!”

“I’m cold…” You said weakly, sniffing again.

“You’re crying ‘cause you’re cold?” He scoffed. “Why ain’t you by the fire then?” You just shrugged, and you were surprised when you felt his hand grabbing your arm. “Come on.”

You yanked your arm free. “I thought you were disgusted to touch me!” You snapped, overreacting, but you couldn’t help it.

“The fuck you talking about.”

“I sat down next to you and you moved away…” You explained, feeling like an idiot now. “And…and I’m so, so cold…and my period came and there’s no running water and I feel disgusting…” You were embarrassed you were saying all that aloud, to Daryl no less, but you couldn’t help yourself, sniffing again. “And I’m cold and you’re warm but you don’t want me near…”

Daryl wasn’t saying anything and you hid your face in your hands, utterly embarrassed at yourself and still sniffing. You knew Daryl was right, you had to go back, it was dangerous to be away from the others and you’d freeze, but you were feeling too embarrassed. Then, Daryl’s hand was on your arm again.

“Come on. You can’t be away.”

You nodded, sniffing, and you got up to follow him, still too embarrassed to look at him. You walked with Daryl in silence and sat down next to the fire again. Still sniffing, you lied down, curling onto yourself, shivering despite the fire. You were so cold, and lonely, and feeling so awful…

You had been lying there for a little while when you felt someone sitting down next to you. You looked over your shoulder, startled, and you saw it was Daryl. He seemed really awkward, hugging his knees to his chest, and you didn’t say anything, afraid he might pull away again.

Then he was lying next to you, his back brushing yours ever so softly, and you could barely hide your surprise. You felt his warmth immediately, your body soaking it greedily, but what you enjoyed the most was the feeling of comfort that it brought.

You didn’t know why was he doing it, if he was cold himself, but maybe he was indeed trying to prevent you from freezing? Maybe even trying to make you feel better? You weren’t too sure, but you were very much grateful anyway. You decided not to say anything, not wanting to push your luck, and you did your best to fall asleep.

You woke up when you felt the warmth leaving you, chills going down your spine. “Where you going?” You couldn’t help but whine, not totally awake yet.

“To take watch,” Daryl whispered back and you nodded. It made sense. You wrapped yourself as tight as possible in your coat and closed your eyes again.

*

You didn’t know if you were more uncomfortable, awkward, or scared, but certainly, this wasn’t your best moment. You were away from the group, trying to have a moment of privacy to pee and change. To make it worse, you heard the rustle of some leaves close to you. Great, a walker was coming and all you had in hand to protect yourself was a fresh pair of knickers.

You dropped the knickers to the ground and made to take the knife that you had in your belt since Daryl had instructed you to do so when you started joining his search for Sophia, but you stopped when you saw the noise was Daryl himself. Certainly, much less worrying than a walker, and certainly much more awkward too.

“The hell you doing alone again?” He snapped.

“Pee?” You blushed red up to your ears, your whole face burning. “I mean, I had to pee…”

“Shouldn’t be alone anyway,” Daryl grumbled.

“Yeah, well…I needed a moment…” You all tended to stick with someone even to go pee, you, in particular, were paranoid since Amy had died going to the bathroom at the RV alone when everything seemed peaceful. “Daryl, I’m not going to pee and change in front of you.” You blurted out.

“I wasn’t saying that!” Daryl snapped and now it was him who was blushing red. “Don’t care, be alone if you want.”

You let out a sigh…he snapped so easily, you couldn’t get bothered on trying to prevent him from doing it, it was impossible. “I’m just peeing, you all are like right there!” You pointed at the area of the camp, behind some trees. “I have a knife, I’ll run if I see walkers! I just want to check my pants in peace and made sure I don’t bleed through and become walkers bait.” Yeah…there it was, too much information. You ran a hand across your face, embarrassed to death. “Look…I…thank you for coming to check, really, thank you, Daryl.” Knowing that someone cared was indeed good, even if the timing was awkward. “I just need a minute and I’ll be back.”

Daryl didn’t say anything else, just scowled at you, and you wished you could read his mind. Was he angry? Was he thinking? Was he just…himself and his resting murder face?

“You said something about running water,” he said, out of the blue, and you were taken aback but you nodded. Running water would be a blessing now. “There’s a creek near, I’m gonna tell the others now.”

“That’s great!” You grinned. “Just…give me a second and I’ll be there.”

Daryl nodded without looking at you, turning around and going back to the camp.

The creek was indeed a blessing, even if the water was freezing, but you could refill the bottles of water and clean yourselves as best as possible. It was awkward, making small groups to wash yourselves in the creek but also made sure that no walker sneaked on you, but it was better than getting eaten or go without cleaning yourself at all.

The cold water made you almost freeze, and you wrapped your arms around yourself, shivering as your teeth chatted. You noticed Daryl looking at you while he talked to Rick, and you tried to appear strong. You had embarrassed yourself enough. Then, you all went back to the cars to keep driving, hoping to find someplace safe to stay.

All you found to stay that night was a barn with a half-fallen roof and one of the walls almost gone, but it was better than nothing. You curled up next to the fire again, shivering, and you closed your eyes to try to sleep. You hadn’t been trying for long when once again you felt Daryl lying next to you, and his back against you, barely there, but enough for you to feel his warmth. You couldn’t help your smile.

“Thanks,” you whispered, and you had no answer, not that you were expecting one.

Chapter Text

It kept going like that. You moved every day or so, trying to find a safe place, trying to find supplies, but walkers were everywhere, chasing you, forcing you to constantly move. Much to your surprise, Daryl kept coming to lie next with you every night. The first time that you all had slept under a roof, you had thought he wouldn’t come, since you weren’t outside in the cold. You were cold anyway, and when you had shyly sat down next to him, he hadn’t pushed away, and eventually, he’d slept next to you too.

He never said anything about it, and neither did you. Still, you felt as if somehow it was bringing you closer to him, even though it was stupid, sleeping next to each other and sharing body warmth wasn’t going to magically make you two know each other better. And still…you found yourself starting little conversations here and there, enjoying his company, and then Daryl would actually speak to you, or at the very least, he would listen.

It was a strange feeling. You didn’t know if you were friends or not, but you knew that you liked his company, and talking with him. You liked it when it looked like he was really listening to you, and when he did tell you more about tracking, hunting, bikes…you had found those were the things that got him talking more easily.

Little less than two weeks had passed since that night Daryl went to lie next to you for the first time, and yet you felt like you would never sleep as good again if one day he decided to just stop…

You were now in a small cabin, anxiously waiting for him, Maggie, Glenn, and T-Dog to come from a run. It wasn’t their first run, but you knew runs were dangerous, and you were scared every time someone went to one. Rick was outside taking watch, and relief washed over you when you heard him saying the group was coming back.

They came back with cans of food and a some squirrels that Daryl had hunted, and also some winter clothes and more blankets that were more than welcomed, since you only had some sleeping bags and you didn’t think you could make it in winter with just that, if you had to camp outside, or even in a cabin like that.

“I uh…saw this…” Daryl’s voice surprised you as you were lost in thought. “Thought maybe it was your size…” You looked at him and he was holding a coat. It was longer than yours, which was made more for spring than winter, nicer, and it looked heavier and warmer too.

“Thank you…” You carefully took the coat, surprised, and you couldn’t help a smile, it felt so nice and warm. You tried it on and it was a bit too big, but it just made it even comfier. “It’s so fluffy.” It seemed to have some kind of fur in the inside, and the cuffs and neckline were made with fluffy, big synthetic fur too. It was perfect. “And it feels so warm. Thank you Daryl. It’s perfect.” He didn’t say anything, but you noticed the corner of his mouth twitching into a small smile.

Those were the last good news you had for the day, though, not much later you all had to leave the cabin, a group of walkers was approaching and they were too many for you. As you approached the cars, you were surprised by more of them, but that group was smaller. You stayed behind Daryl as he killed monsters, watching, trying to learn by looking at him, and when one of the walkers had his back to you and it was safe to approach, you put it down. Daryl held the last one, dodging its claws and teeth, and put it down.

“You gotta tell me how to do that, holding it without it biting you or grabbing you back.”

“Just made sure you have a good hold. It’s gonna struggle, you can’t let it go. These things are stronger than they look, but dumber too.” He kicked the walker that was on the ground, you knew how much he hated them. “Keep it at distance or it’ll grab you, then be quick with the knife.”

“Okay, I’ll try.”

“Careful, though…”

That night, you had to sleep out in the open again, though Glenn had located a place in the map that looked promising, but it was too far to go that day. And so you were once again on the ground, shivering, next to the dying fire. You were more than grateful for the coat, but you were shivering anyway. With your old coat, you knew your teeth would be chattering and all your body would be hurting form the cold. Some nights, only Daryl’s warmth had stopped you from thinking you’d freeze and die. You didn’t want to think about winter. You scooted closer to Daryl without a word, and lied down next to him, while he was still sat down.

“Thought you were warm with the coat?”

You weren’t sure if he was joking or not, but you hoped he wasn’t thinking about stopping sleeping next to you. “I’m less cold…cold anyway.” You heard him chuckling, and then he was getting up. You looked at him sadly, but you saw he was talking with Carol, taking one of the blankets. You hadn’t taken any since you had a new, warm coat, you were too shy to ask for a blanket too, but Carol gave Daryl one, and he came back to you.

He sat down next to you and threw the blanket over you. “Thanks…” you snuggled to the blanket…maybe Daryl wouldn’t lie with you now, but at least he had cared enough to give you not only a coat but also a blanket, that had to mean that he was your friend, right? You hoped so…

You were still thinking about it when you felt him shifting to lie down next to you, and you couldn’t help your smile. He had no blanket or coat, just his jacket and vest, yet he never complained. Without a word, you took the blanket that he had placed over you, and threw part of it over him too.

Soon, both your back and the blanket were warm, and you felt like inside a comforting cocoon, sleeping peacefully even in the open air. Somehow, when you were next to Daryl, you felt as if you were safe, walkers or not…

*

As weeks passed, winter approaching, you were more than grateful for the warmth of Daryl’s body next to you every night, but every night it was harder for you to not turn around and snuggle to him, looking more for comfort than for warm, and for that closeness to him, that sort of strange bond that you could feel with him when you slept next to him and when you got to talk with him alone, but that never felt like enough for you.

One night, you were once again sleeping out in the cold after you were forced to leave a warehouse where you had stayed for a couple of days. At least now you had some fabric that Daryl and Rick tied to some trees to stop the wind from hitting you too much, along with some cord and cans around the camp that would rattle if walkers got caught on them. It was an improvement from your first camps.

You woke up when Daryl came to lie next to you, after hours taking watch, and you heard him letting out a tired sigh and a grunt as he shifted to get comfortable, his back against yours. You thought he worked too much, eat too little, and slept even less, but you didn’t know how to word your concern to him.

You waited until you were sure he was asleep and then you couldn’t help yourself from turning around and pressing yourself against his back, careful not to wake him, your hand grabbing the fabric at the side of his jacket carefully as you gently rested your forehead against his back. You weren’t warmer like that, but it felt different, closer…

When you woke up in the morning, you realized your arm was thrown over Daryl. You weren’t quite hugging him, but you were closer than you had ever slept, your face still buried on his warm back and your arm resting over his side. You were embarrassed, afraid of Daryl catching you and getting angry, but you felt too good to move…

Then Daryl was waking up too, catching you off guard and you didn’t know what to do, and so you just pretended to be asleep, like those first times you had slept next to him at Hershel’s farm and had rolled closer to him. You felt him stiff as he noticed your closeness, your arm over him, and you were sure he was going to freak out and push you away, yell at you maybe, but he didn’t.

He stayed still for a couple of minutes, just lying next to you, and then he was grabbing your arm, but carefully, not to throw it away from him, just to gently reposition it on the ground so he could get up but as if trying not to wake you. You didn’t know what to think…maybe he didn’t mind that you snuggled to him like that…or maybe he thought you didn’t mean to…

You didn’t say anything about it, didn’t ask, and neither did him, going about your day as if nothing had happened. With…well…maybe nothing had happened…why would you make a big deal out of it…

That night, finally lying down on the hard ground of an abandoned tiny house that you had found, late in the day, you tried again. You forced yourself to wait awake and then you carefully placed your arm over him, not really daring to hug him. Came morning, and Daryl still didn’t freak out, lying there for some minutes until he carefully placed your arm off him to get up.

You still weren’t sure if it was him not minding it, or him not wanting to disturb your sleep, but either way, you liked it…

A couple of weeks passed until you tried something else. This time, you gathered enough courage to turn around when Daryl was still awake, and you placed your arm over his side, barely there, holding your breath. You felt him stiff, but he didn’t say anything, didn’t move, and you didn’t know what to think.

“It’s…it’s this okay?” You whispered and Daryl didn’t say anything. You feared that you were making him uncomfortable, that he didn’t like having you so close, but that he hadn’t done anything before in order not to wake you. “Sorry,” you whispered, taking your arm away, but then you felt Daryl’s hand on your wrist, ever so gentle, stopping you from pulling away.

He was still silent, and you weren’t sure of what he wanted. Did he want you to keep sleeping snuggled to him, your arm around him? He didn’t mind it? Not knowing what to do, you placed your arm around him, and you felt him relax slowly. So he didn’t mind…that was good to know…

Days passed, and one night your arm wasn’t just lying awkwardly over him, but actually wrapped around him, without Daryl seeming to mind, and then you were just cuddling to him every night, snuggling against his back as you hugged him to you. He didn’t seem to mind, and you certainly didn’t mind at all to spoon him, your nights getting better as you snuggled your very own Daryl heating blanket.

*

Autumn was almost over and the cold of winter was chilling you to the bone. You were camping outside after days of sleeping inside a cabin, and now you were again shivering hard, wrapped in your fluffy coat and a blanket, your teeth chattering anyway. Hershel was heating on the fire some herbs that he had collected, and Maggie approached you with a steamy cup.

“Here, it’ll warm you from inside,” she offered but you shook your head. “Why not? You’re freezing.”

“If I drink that now I’ll have to pee in the middle of the night, so I’ll have to get up and leave the blanket, and be even colder, and potentially get eaten.”

Maggie chuckled at all that. “You can tell Daryl to go with you.”

“Yes, ‘cause that doesn’t sound awkward at all.”

“I’ve gone to pee with you a million times by now.” Maggie shrugged.

“Yeah…not the same.”

“And I’ve been peeing in front of Glenn for months now.”

“Okay, first, too much information. Second, awkward as hell… and anyway, he’s your boyfriend.”

“So?”

“So what?”

“Daryl, he’s not that?”

You snorted. “I don’t know what Daryl is, but I know he’s not my boyfriend.”

“You sure of that?” Maggie lifted an eyebrow at you, smirking. “You’re always together when he’s not hunting, and you two get pretty cozy at night.”

“Yeah, well…” You blushed at her words. “We’re friends.” At least you were sure of that now. “We like each other’s company, and we share body warmth at night, because this weather is damn cold. That is.”

“That is then?” Maggie kept looking at you in that way, and you didn’t know why you were getting all flustered.

“Hmm hmm” You nodded.

“Okay.” She shrugged and nudged you with the cup of tea. “Come on drink this, you have to get warm, your lips are turning blue. I’ll go pee with you.”

*

You shouldn’t have drunk that damn tea. You needed to pee, you tried to hold it and sleep again, wait until the morning, but you couldn’t. You silently cursed your bladder, the tea, Maggie, and also Hershel for good measure. Now you had to get up and walk away from the group, and everything was dark and creepy around you.

You had put down a few walkers by now, but still, the idea of any of them creeping to you at night was scary…especially if you had your pants around your ankles. It’d be the most embarrassing death ever. You wondered if you would be the first one to die like that. Probably not.

You decided you were too scared to go alone by night, and you tried to swallow your embarrassment, tugging at Daryl’s shirt. “Daryl…Daryl…”

“Hmm?” He hummed, waking up, and then he sat up, looking around, searching for danger and frowning at you when he didn’t find any. “What?”

“Would you come pee with me?” You blurted out, blushing in embarrassment.

“The fuck?”

“I…I have to pee and I’m scared of going alone.” You admitted, making more sense this time.

“Oh…” You could feel how awkward Daryl was, and you regretted saying anything. “Okay…come on.”

He got up and you couldn’t help but look at him in surprise before getting up too. You walked slightly away from the others, stopping not too far, and then Daryl turned his back to you. It was all so awkward that you were surprised when you actually managed to pee, but at least you were so awkward that you forgot how cold you were for a moment.

“Done…” You tell Daryl awkwardly. “Thanks.” He just nodded and you both began to walk back to the others. You sat down with your blanket again, lying down on your back on the cold ground, and you began to shiver again. “Thank you,” you said again when Daryl went to lie down next to you. “I mean it, I’m sorry I woke you and I know it was awkward bu-”

“Shut up and sleep,” Daryl grumbled as he hid his face in the scrunched shirt he was using as a pillow, and you were surprised when you felt him casually throwing his arm over you. He wasn’t hugging you, or cuddling you, or anything like that, but still, it took you by surprise and you almost forgot how to breathe.

You didn’t know if Daryl knew what he was doing or not, if maybe he was just too tired to care, but you didn’t dare to move a millimeter, in case he’d decide to take his arm away from you. It felt so warm over you, heavy and comforting, protective even. It made you a bit nervous too, you didn’t know why, but you closed your eyes and tried to sleep, letting the warmth coming from Daryl comfort you.

When you woke up, his arm was still over you, and you kind of loved it. You guessed he was still asleep, and you couldn’t stop yourself from running a finger over his hand, ever so softly. His skin was so warm despite the cold weather, you couldn’t help your smile. Daryl’s hand moved ever so softly under your fingers and you glanced at Daryl, blushing deep when you realized he was awake.

You were going to apologize, pull away, but he wasn’t saying anything, wasn’t taking his hand away from you or moving away, he didn’t seem mad at you, he wasn’t freaking out…he was just looking at you. You caressed his hand again with your finger, ever so softly, and still he didn’t move or snapped at you. After some minutes, Daryl pulled away from you, gently, not as if he were angry or awkward, heading to take watch or to hunt, you guessed.

You wondered what Daryl might do if you tried to snuggle with him and hold him at daylight as you did at night, if he’d ever let you hold his hand, let alone caress it. You kind of felt like he wouldn’t, but you didn’t dare to try. You wondered, too, when you had begun to want to do all that, instead of just stealing Daryl’s warmth at night.

Maggie’s words echoed in your mind but you silenced them. It was nothing like that, just two friends keeping each other warm, even your friendship wasn’t the usual kind. You cared for Daryl, and you were more or less sure he cared for you, but that was all, nothing else.

Anyway, you knew that something like that…nah, it couldn’t be.

Chapter Text

You were in a warehouse, big and impossible to warm, safe but oh so, so cold. Autumn was gone, you thought, winter arriving and you were frozen every hour of every day, and you were sure that the only thing that had prevented you from freezing at night was Daryl’s warmth next to you. You kept holding him at night, getting more daring the colder you were, snuggling to his back and hiding your face on his jacket, greedily soaking his warmth, scent and comfort. Daryl didn’t hold you, not really, but sometimes you woke up to his arm thrown over you, heavy and warm, and you’d stay still, pretending to be asleep, to keep him there a little longer. It was silly, but you couldn’t help it.

You shivered as you lied down on the hard, cold concrete, despite the sleeping bag, wondering what would be worse, this damn concrete or the ground outside. You couldn’t wait to have Daryl and his warmth next to you, shivering as you were, your teeth chattering. This must be one of the coldest nights, or at least you were frozen. You smiled, relieved, when you felt Daryl finally settling next to you under the blanket.

“I’m cold,” you whined quietly.

“I know,” Daryl rasped back.

Before you could move and turn to hug him, you felt him shifting closer to you and wrapping an arm around you, hugging you instead. You weren’t expecting that, and you almost gasped in surprise. Daryl didn’t say anything, just held you to him, his warmth enveloping you. It felt so good. Maybe he had thought this time that you were actually going to freeze? Did you look that cold?

If all it took for Daryl to hold you like that was lie down shivering and freezing, you could have done it way earlier. It felt so good, as if for the first time the cold were almost, almost, leaving your bones, a sense of comfort and safety filling you.

“Thank you,” you whispered, and you weren’t surprised when Daryl didn’t say anything back. You were surprised, though, when you couldn’t help yourself from snuggling back to him and Daryl didn’t only not tense up, but he actually held you closer. A nice surprise, indeed.

*

You lost the warehouse in a week, and anyway, you would have needed to go looking for more supplies soon, especially gas. You all drove to a gas station located on the map without much hope, only to find walkers there. Rick drove over the ones outside, crushing them…safer than by knife, but that car was going to need a good wash. It was disgusting.

As you had feared, there was no gas left, but Rick decided you’d all stop there for the night, and for that, you needed to clear the walkers inside. Rick knocked on the window glass and a group of walkers began pushing at it. One had the uniform of the gas station, and the others you guessed were people who had taken refuge inside. It hadn’t turned out that well for them…you decided not to think about it.

You went with the group to clear the place, knife ready. Rick opened the door and the few walkers tumbled out, but between you all, you managed to put them down without a problem. While you and the others cleaned the place and got it ready for the night, Daryl decided to keep riding alone, see if he could find something useful, and then come back. It worried you, but you knew he’d do it anyway.

You waited for him to come back, worrying, and when you heard the bike you walked out of the gas station, relieved to see him back safe. He stopped the bike next to Rick, who was taking watch, and you saw them talking. Then he realized you were there and he made his way to you.

“You’re always complaining you’re cold, what you doing out here?”

“I wanted to see that you were okay…” You said shyly, and Daryl glanced at you but didn’t say anything. You saw him rubbing his fingers as you both walked inside, and you knew they were probably cold, with his fingerless gloves. Daryl never said anything or complained about being cold, but you knew he was, sometimes, despite feeling so warm when he lied next to you, you had felt how cold his hands were most of the nights too, until you warmed each other.

After that first night, you had thought that Daryl hugging you to sleep had been a one-night thing, but much to your surprise, and delight, it wasn’t. Most of the nights it was you who would wrap your arms around him and snuggle to his back, but others, Daryl would hold you to him while you slept. You loved both, hold him and being held, maybe even too much…

“There’s a group of cars blocking the road down there,” Daryl explained when you both sat down over some fabric that you had thrown on the concrete. “We could get something from the cars, at least the gas. We have to clear the walkers first.”

“Too many?”

“Not enough, we have to do it.”

“Okay.” You trusted Daryl’s judgment. You looked at him shyly, biting your lip. “Can you…can you give me your hand?” Daryl frowned at you in surprise. “Just do it.” He hesitantly reached out his hand for you, awkward and looking at you with mistrust, and you almost snorted, wondering what did he think you might do. You were wearing wool gloves and you took his hand in yours, keeping it between yours to try and warm his fingers. Daryl didn’t say anything, and once that hand was a little bit warmer, you did the same with the other. “You freeze in that bike.”

“Nah, I’m used to it.”

“Still, you need to find yourself something more than that jacket, with the cold wind hitting you and all, it can’t be good.”

“Told you I’m used to it, it ain’t that bad.” Daryl rolled his eyes. “I ain’t you, I ain’t cold all the time.” You knew by the look in his eyes and his tone, that he was joking. It had taken you a while, but by now you could more or less read him. You scoffed and pushed him softly, making him snort.

You looked down and tried to push through your shyness. “I could go with you…if you want…maybe…so your back would be less cold…”

“Nah, you’d get cold.”

“Okay…” You bit your lip. “In spring, maybe? It’s just…I’ve never been on a bike before…”

“Okay.” Daryl shrugged, it didn’t seem to be a big deal for him, and you smiled, relieved.

That night, when you wrapped your arms around Daryl, pressing yourself against his warm back, your hand searched for his shyly under the blanket, and you placed your hand on top of his when you found it, not really daring to hold it. He didn’t seem to mind, keeping his hand under yours, and when you woke up that morning, a silly smile spread across your face when you noticed your fingers laced.

*

You had thought you couldn’t be colder, but you had been wrong. You were shivering hard as you walked through the woods. You had lost the place you had been staying in, but Daryl had found a cabin while hunting, but you couldn’t reach it by car, not even with his bike, and so now you were all walking to it, carrying your stuff, after having left your vehicles as best hidden as possible.

You were tired, carrying several bags with stuff, and feeling stabs in your feet as you walked, and you were so, so cold, you couldn’t stop shivering. You were getting behind both because you were tired and shivering too bad to walk fast, and because Daryl was walking at the rear of the group, making sure no walker came to you from behind.

“You okay?” He asked as he approached you.

“Yeah…just cold, the usual.” You tried to give him a smile. You were embarrassed of yourself, Lori was pregnant, cold, underfeed, walking non stop too, and she didn’t complain. You shouldn’t either, you had to be stronger.

Daryl gave you a worried look but he nodded, reaching to squeeze your shoulder. “Come on, it’s not far now.”

Once you were in the cabin, you distanced yourself from the others, leaving the main room where they were making a fire to go to one of the rooms. Your feet were feeling worse. You were freezing cold but they felt like burning, your toes itching to the point of making you cry. You didn’t want to cry in front of anyone else, you wanted to be strong.

You sat down on the floor and took off your boots and socks to inspect your feet. Your toes were swollen and red. Chilblains. You had gotten damn chilblains just by walking out in the cold for a while…you felt even weaker. They itched and burned, and it didn’t stop when you scratched them, it just made it worse. You couldn’t stop your tears, feeling weak, and cold, and hurting.

“The hell you doing here?” Came Daryl’s voice before you could react or even put your socks back on, and you looked at him with wet eyes as a deer caught on lights. “What are you crying about?!”

“Nothing.” You rushed to put your socks, but Daryl had already realized that you were barefoot and he knelt next to you, pushing your hands away to inspect your foot, noticing the chilblains.

“Hurt?” He asked and you were going to say no, but you found yourself nodding. He sat down next to you, placing your feet on his lap, and then he was rubbing his hands together to warm them before taking one of your feet between his hands, and he began massaging your hurting toes, trying to warm them up.

“You don’t have too…” You tried to pull your foot away, embarrassed and feeling weak and like a bother. Daryl ignored you, though, and he didn’t let you pull away. Once he finished rubbing your toes, he put your socks and boots back, tying them loosely.

“Come on, you gotta sit next to the fire.”

You let him pull you up and went to sit down with him and the others around the fire. Some of them looked at you, but they didn’t ask anything, much to your relief. Daryl rummaged through one of the bags, taking out your old coat, and after taking off your shoes, he wrapped the coat around your feet to keep them warm.

“Chilblains?” Hershel guessed and you nodded, embarrassed, but he gave you a kind smile as he passed you a cup with hot soup. “They’ll go away by themselves in a couple of weeks, just keep your feet warm like that, near the fire.”

“Thanks…” You murmured, still embarrassed. Daryl came to sit down next to you, with a blanket this time, that he wrapped around you, and so you whispered another thanks to him before lifting part of the blanket so you could cover Daryl with it too.

That night, you couldn’t be more grateful of having Daryl’s arms wrapped tight around you, holding you to him through the cold night. Your toes burned and the itching was maddening, but what made you tear up was how useless and weak you felt. You tried to keep it quiet, but Daryl noticed your sniff.

“Are you cold?”

You shock your head. You were chill, sure, you always were, but Daryl’s body protected you from the worse, you weren’t as cold when you were cuddled with him. “You’re warm.”

“Does it hurt?”

During all your nights sleeping snuggled together, you had never faced him, but you turned onto his arms now, holding to his jacket, biting your lip as you tried not to cry more. “I’m useless.”

“What you mean?”

“I got chilblains just from walking through the woods…I’m weak…” You whimpered, trying to keep it quiet so no one else would hear you.

Daryl scoffed. “I got chilblains one winter while hunting, years ago.”

“Yeah?” You looked at him and Daryl nodded, genuine. He was the opposite of weak, though. “But… I’m always cold, always. Everyone keeps going, they have their coats and blankets, just like me, but I’m always shivering, always freezing…”

“It ain’t your fault that you’re cold.” Daryl frowned at you.

“I’m not cut for this world…like, it feels I might just freeze to death one night. Look at Lori, she’s pregnant and she barely eats, or sleeps, she’s cold too, but she doesn’t complain, she keeps going, while I drag you to sleep with me every night, I’m pretty sure I’d have frozen to death by now without you.” Maybe it was impossible, but you felt like so. “I’m weak and useless, and-”

“Shut up with it already,” Daryl snapped, cutting your rant, and you flinched a bit, realizing that you were probably annoying him with your venting. “Sleep,” he said, gentler this time. “Come on. You ain’t useless, or weak, or all that shit. You just get cold easy. Ain’t the same.”

You looked at his face, trying to see if he meant it. He was chewing on his lip and looking away from you, but he seemed genuine, and you decided to believe him. Instead of turning your back to him, you snuggled further into him, wrapping your arms around him and hiding your face on his chest. You were relieved when he didn’t push you away, in fact, he held you tighter, placing his hand at the back of your head.

*

“I don’t know, it’s strange to see you with so much color…”

A few weeks had passed since you got chilblains and they were gone now, but not the cold. Daryl had gotten himself a poncho, finally something else that he could wear on his bike besides his jacket and vest, and you were teasing him a bit about it.

“You think I care how I look?” Daryl grumbled and you couldn’t help your chuckle.

“I’m kidding! I like it, I like how it looks.” You ran a hand over the material. “It feels good, warm.”

“You ain’t stealing it from me,” Daryl said, and you were glad he’d relaxed enough to joke.

“Don’t need it, I have this super nice coat that you got me.” You grinned and Daryl blushed, looking away from you. “But that poncho is pretty cool too.”

That evening, you sat down with Daryl at the outside of the house where you were staying now, keeping watch. Without a word, Daryl took off the poncho and wrapped it around you.

“I thought you said I wasn’t stealing it?” You teased and Daryl shrugged without looking at you. You unwrapped the poncho and placed it both over Daryl and you like a blanket. “See, enough for us both, this poncho was a good find.” He was still saying nothing, and you rested your head on his shoulder, thinking a way of getting him to talk to you. “How did you tell me that you learn to hotwire?”

*

You couldn’t believe it, but it seemed like the cold was finally going away. The days were less and less cold, and you couldn’t be more glad about it. Especially since Daryl didn’t stop sleeping next to you anyway.

You woke up now to not only his arm thrown over you but also his leg, and you giggled. Last night you had been tossing and turning, too worried about Lori and how big she was getting without a safe enough place to deliver the baby, and you had been unable to sleep. At some point, Daryl had grumbled to you to stop it and sleep, and he had thrown his leg over yours, pinning you and keeping you still, and also making you giggle.

You realized he was awake too when you felt him pulling away from you, and you turned to look at him. “Where’re you going?”

“Hunting.”

“Okay…”

Later, you walked out of the cabin where you were staying now. The day was sunny and you decided to go looking for Daryl, hoping not to bother him, he had had time to hunt something by now and he should come back and eat something. You usually didn’t go out alone, no one of you did, but by now you knew the place where Daryl usually hunted, he had taken you with him before, it was near the cabin and seemed safe enough.

You took your knife and a gun, and walked into the woods. You hadn’t walked far when you noticed two dead walkers on the ground. You let out a sad sigh…you had been sheltered from walkers there for a week, but maybe they were getting closer again and you would need to leave the nice cabin…

You knew by the kind of would on their heads that Daryl had put down those walkers with his crossbow. Some blood on the ground caught your attention, followed by a trail of blood. It didn’t come from the walkers, and the thought of Daryl being hurt and bleeding came to your mind…maybe…maybe even bitten? No, he was too good of a fighter, he wouldn’t get hurt by two walkers…would he?

“Daryl?” You called for him, and there was no answer. “Daryl?” You couldn’t shake the fear and you began following the trail of blood, getting more and more scared as Daryl didn’t answer your calls. Was he really hurt? Was he bleeding…he couldn’t be badly hurt, he couldn’t be bitten, he couldn’t. You were so scared, all the worse scenarios running through your head without you being able to stop it, that when you actually heard his voice, it took you by surprise.

“What? You trying to scare all the game or to bring all the walkers to you?” There he was, safe and sound, skinning a deer near the creek. You were so relieved that you teared up, it embarrassed you but you couldn’t help it. Daryl noticed, getting up and looking at you in shock and worry, making his way to you. “What?”

Daryl was next to you and you couldn’t help yourself from wrapping your arms around him to hug him, even if you felt more and more embarrassed, but you had been so scared seeing that blood and knowing that Daryl was alone.

“I…I…” You didn’t know how to explain it, the way you had freaked out. “I saw the walkers…and then the blood…and I called for you…and I though…I don’t know…I thought maybe you were hurt…I got scared…I…” You were feeling so stupid, you pulled away from Daryl, looking at the ground.

“I hunt the deer and then saw those two walkers coming for it, so I put them down, then I dragged the deer here to get it ready.” It made sense, he got his kills ready away from the cabin and near the creek when he was able to. You just felt more and more silly.

“I’m sorry…” You murmured.

“For what?” Daryl asked and you just shrugged. He didn’t say anything for a few seconds, before he spoke again. “Come on, it was time you learned how to get deer ready.”

You spent the next hour doing so, watching at Daryl in order to learn and also doing what he instructed you, feeling grateful that he was taking your mind off your embarrassment while also teaching you something useful. It was disgusting and hard, but you knew you should learn every bit of useful information that Daryl taught you.

“We look disgusting…” You said once you finished, making your way to the creek and submerging your hands in the water. “Shit, it’s freezing!”

“It was worse in winter.” Daryl was following your example and you nodded. In all honesty, no one of you all had washed much during winter, but the couple of times you had tried on a creek, you had been totally sure you’d die after it, no matter you turned yourself into a cocoon of blankets and sat next to the fire while Daryl held you. Sure, the water had been colder then, but it was cold now too.

Daryl was unbuttoning his bloodied shirt, probably to wash himself better, and you noticed he seemed awkward, so you looked away, turning your back to him. By this point, you all had changed clothes in front of everyone else, living in such close quarters, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t still awkward. You knew Daryl was uncomfortable about everyone seeing the scars on his back because he didn’t want people asking about them. You understood.

You heard him splashing water over himself, and you decided to do the same. It was less awkward to wash yourself when it was only Daryl there, and you would never go alone without someone to watch your back in case walkers came. You took off your shirt, shivering a bit as you stood there in your sports bra, and then you tugged off your trousers too before kneeling on the river bank.

“I haven’t shaved my legs in…I don’t even know.” You commented.

“And what you care?”

“I don’t…do you?” You didn’t know why you said that.

“Why’d you care if I cared?” Daryl looked at you briefly, seeming confused, before averting his eyes again.

“I wouldn’t…” You shrugged, defensive.

“I don’t give a shit…” Daryl still sounded like he didn’t know why you were making a big deal of something like that, and you chuckled.

“Yeah, you know what? Me neither. Good thing about the apocalypse? I’m not shaving ever again.” Must be the only good thing about the apocalypse, that, and meeting Daryl.

You stared at the water, trying to summon enough will power to actually begin washing yourself, when suddenly the freezing water was splashing you.

“Shit, fuck, no!” You yelped, glaring at Daryl, who was chuckling, looking at you and smirking. “Dixon, I’m killing you right now!”

“Nah you ain’t, I ain’t scared of you.”

You splashed him back, but he didn’t even flinch, as if he weren’t bothered by the cold, and he just splashed you again, making you yelp and crawl away, glaring at him.

“I’m so killing you right now, if the others ask I’ll tell them it was the walkers!”

Chapter Text

You walked out of the house in which you were staying and towards Daryl, who was taking watch, and you wrapped your arms around him, hugging him from behind and resting your cheek against his back.

“Don’t tell me you are cold,” Daryl joked.

“A bit…” You joked back, making him snort. You snuggled to him, you didn’t know when you had started hugging him just because, not only when you slept, but you liked it.

The cold was finally gone, or so it seemed, spring was here, and with it the welcomed warm and sun, and also the unwelcomed humidity. You wore a tank top now, not layers and layers of sweaters, though you still wore a thin shirt over it, and you got a bit chilly in the evening, when the sun went down. At night, you still slept with a blanket over you, or in the warmer nights, with Daryl’s poncho. Daryl kept sleeping with you, even if you weren’t shivering to death at night anymore, and you hoped he didn’t plan on stopping.

“Shit…” You heard Daryl’s curse and pulled away from him, following his gaze. A big group of walkers was slowly making its way down the road, and you let out a sad sigh.

“I was an idiot thinking we could live here forever, right?” Lori really needed a place to stay, the baby needed it, you couldn’t keep going like that.

Daryl gave you a small smile, reaching to squeeze your shoulder. “Come on, tell everyone, we need to leave.”

The next week went like that, finding places to stay just to be forced to leave them the next day, walkers everywhere, until one day, out of the blue, Daryl and Rick found a prison while hunting. At first you weren’t sure how you felt about it, but Rick was right, it was safe. You’d have fences and walls to protect you. It’d be the safest you had been.

But for that, you needed to clear the place, and there seemed to be hundreds of walkers in there. You’d go little by little. That day, you all managed to clear the perimeter of the fence so it was safe to spend the night there, no matter there were some walkers growling at the fence. Tomorrow, you’d have to try and clear a yard and a cellblock, but for now, it was time to eat and rest.

You lied on your back next to Daryl, looking at the starry sky. “What star is that?” You asked Daryl.

“The hell do I know.” Daryl turned his head to look at you, frowning.

“I don’t know…I guessed you might know stuff about the stars, since you know about the woods and tracking…”

“How knowing shit about the stars helps to track?” Daryl asked and you shrugged, but yeah, he was right.

“I don’t know, you just strike me as a person who could know about that…”

“I don’t.”

“Nobody is perfect.” You joked, turning onto your side and snuggling to him, throwing an arm over him and resting your head on his chest. His arm wrapped around you and he began playing with your hair absentmindedly.

You didn’t know when Daryl and you had started to be that intimate. You couldn’t pinpoint it, but you didn’t care about when, you just enjoyed it. You neither knew when it had stopped being something that you did just to be warm, but it felt like an eternity ago. You felt…something, when you looked at Daryl. When he talked to you, comforted you, smiled to you, held you…there was something there, that you didn’t care to acknowledge or name it, you just enjoyed it as it was.

You looked up from Daryl’s chest to smile at him, and he smiled to you too, his smile soft and small, the kind that made your heart flutter in a certain way. You didn’t care what it was this thing that you two had, whatever it was, you just wanted to enjoy it.

*

Clearing the yard and the cellblock had been scary, dangerous, and exhausting, but finally you all managed to do it. The next hours went on cleaning the cellblock and making it ready for living. You couldn’t believe you’d get to have your very own cell and a real bed, and you planed to share both things with Daryl.

You had left both of your stuff outside the cell while you got it ready. You had just finished when Daryl walked in after finishing his guard shift. He picked his bags walking away, and so you followed him.

“Hey, where’re you going?”

“To the perch.”

“You don’t like the cell?”

“I ain’t sleeping in no cage,” Daryl grumbled, dropping his stuff on the perch.

“You’re going to leave me alone to freeze?” You tried to joke, even though you were starting to feel anxious at the idea of Daryl actually deciding he didn’t care to sleep next to you anymore.

“It’s warm now,” Daryl answered, making you panic more, but then you caught his smirk. “Just come here too.”

It was a relief that Daryl still wanted to sleep next to you, sure it was, and you couldn’t help your smile. Still, you weren’t going to give up a bed that easily. “There’s a bed in that cell, Daryl, and an actual real bed, with a soft mattress…come on!”

“Told you, I ain’t sleeping in no cage.” Daryl tried to turn away from you but you grabbed his vest, pulling him to you.

“It’s not a cage…well, not anymore.” You tried to reason. “We’ll leave the door open. Hell, we can take apart the whole door for all I care. But le’ts sleep in a bed. Come on…” You pouted at him with puppy eyes and Daryl let out a sigh.

“Okay.”

You grinned and…and where that urge of pecking Daryl’s lips was coming from. You cleared your throat awkwardly, moving away from him and taking one of his bags to walk back to your cell.

You left his bag on the floor next to yours and you dropped onto the bed, bouncing on the mattress. “See, a real bed! Not more sleeping on the ground!” Daryl rolled his eyes at you but gave you a small smile. “Why you don’t like it? I mean I know a cell is not the best thing, but…”

Daryl was suddenly seeming nervous, his fingers twitching as he looked from you to the ground a couple of times, and you wondered if you had said something wrong. You didn’t know what to say, but then he began talking.

“My father used to lock me in a room, sometimes, when I was little…until Merle let me out…” He said quietly without looking at you. “I spent two days locked once ‘cause Merle wasn’t at home.”

You felt again that mix of sadness and rage that always came whenever you learned any tiny detail about Daryl’s father. You reached out for his hand, pulling him closer to you.

“We’ll leave the door open, always. Hell, I’ll shot at the lock if I have to and see if it breaks down.”

Daryl didn’t say anything, just nodded and smiled, squeezing your hand.

*

The bed was much of an improvement, and so was sleeping knowing that you were protected behind walls and fences, so you found yourself sound asleep for hours, sleeping better than since this the dead began walking. When you woke up Daryl was still holding you and your arms were wrapped around him too, your face hidden on his chest, both of you squeezed together on the small bunk. Not that you’d complain.

You looked at Daryl’s face and you realized he was awake too, watching you. You smiled and lifted one of your hands to run your fingers through his hair. It was getting a bit longer and you loved it. He didn’t say anything and neither did you, caressing his face with your knuckles softly.

Damn, you wanted to kiss him. Had you wanted to kiss him before? Yeah, probably…although you never had given it much thought, you had never wondered about what kind of relationship you wanted to have with Daryl, happy as you were with whatever you had…you weren’t very sure of what was Daryl stand on it, either. Right then, you just knew that you wanted to kiss him, and it was being hard to stop yourself from doing it…but, did you need to stop yourself? You chewed on your lower lip as you looked at Daryl, caressing his face again.

“Daryl!” Came Rick’s voice from outside the cell, taking you both out of the moment. “Daryl, I need your help with something…”

You pulled away from Daryl, giving him a shy and slightly nervous smile now that the moment between you two was broken. “Duty calls…”

*

Later that day, you were helping Maggie around, and you waved at Daryl when you saw him passing by not far, talking with Rick, and he nodded back to you. You smiled, feeling twirls in your stomach, but your smile was gone when you noticed Maggie smirking at you, looking at you in a way that made you nervous.

“What?”

“Did you sleep well?”

“Yeah, ‘course I did.” You shrugged. “We have beds at last.”

“And you have Daryl.” She snickered and you frowned at her.

“And? Like always,” you said as if nothing.

“Just…come on, guys! Why are you both so silly about it, you’re not good at being secretive.”

“What you mean? We aren’t being secretive or hiding anything.”

“Oh, right, so then you admit you both are together, not just that ‘keeping each other warm’ thing?”

You blushed up to your ears, you couldn’t help it. “We’re not together! Yes, we share a bed, but that is.”

“That is?” Maggie raised her eyebrows at you.

“That is,” you insisted, defensive. It wasn’t like you were lying, you and Daryl weren’t together, no matter how he made you feel, and you felt too shy to talk about it anyway. “Just…yeah, it’s good not to sleep alone, it’s…comforting…” Whenever Daryl held you, you felt better than at any other moment, safe and protected. “And…it’s warm…we keep each other warm…” Or at least, it was like that at the beginning, or that was what you told yourself. It had turned into something deeper, though, but you didn’t feel like talking about it when you weren’t even sure of how to feel about it yourself.

“Just that, then? So that’s all between Daryl and you? Just keeping each other warm?”

“Just that…” You bit your lip, feeling awful by saying it like that…

“Okay.” Maggie shrugged, getting back to work.

*

That night, you waited for Daryl to join you in bed, but he didn’t, and so you decided to get up and go looking for him. You were pretty sure it wasn’t his turn to take watch. You found him sitting down on the stairs of the perch, his back to you, and you made your way to him.

“Hey,” you greeted but Daryl didn’t say anything. You knelt down behind him and wrapped your arms around his shoulders, frowning when you felt him stiff. “Everything okay?” He nodded in silence without looking at you. “Come to bed?” Still silent, he shook you off him, and you frowned at him, worried. “What’s wrong?” You reached out to hold his hand and he moved away from you.

“Leave me alone.”

His tone made you flinch a bit, but you had no intention of leaving him alone. Something must be wrong for sure, and you needed to help him with whatever it was. You couldn’t leave him like that. “No, Daryl, tell me what’s wrong, please.”

“Nothing’s wrong,” he rasped.

“It’s not true…tell me about it…” You tried to touch him again, but he moved away once more. You didn’t know what to do. Maybe you should let him be, if he really didn’t want to talk about it. Maybe he’d tell you on his own time. “Just…come to bed, please?”

“What for? You ain’t cold” He snapped, and you looked at him, puzzled.

“And? What if I’m not cold?”

“Ain’t that why you sleep with me? So you ain’t cold?” Daryl glared at you. “That’s all, yeah, keeping you warm? Then if you are cold, go and tell T-Dog, I’m done.” Daryl got up, storming down the stairs and out of the cellblock.

Shit…your last words to Maggie. Daryl must have heard. Damn it…you had messed everything. You wondered what was he thinking, but whatever it was, it was no good. Did he think you only wanted him for that? That you only cared about him keeping you warm. That it was nothing else? You needed to fix this mess, and you rushed behind him.

“Daryl, Daryl wait, please!”

“Told you to leave me the fuck alone!” He snapped again, turning to glare at you, but you didn’t let it intimidate you.

“Just…just listen to me please…” You begged. “Just stop for a moment and listen.” Daryl glared at you with mistrust, but he stopped walking away, and you approached him. “I know what I said to Maggie, but it’s not like that, I just…I didn’t feel like talking about it, that’s just…it’s between you and me.” You bit your lip and you tried to push through your shyness. “It’s not just that, okay? I promise. It’s not. I mean, yeah, you keep me warm and I…I really like that. But it’s not just that, not at all.”

Daryl’s face was still hard, and you weren’t sure if he believed you or not.

“It’s…it’s comforting. I feel safe when I sleep with you. I feel…” You didn’t know how to explain it. “You’re not just someone who keeps me warm. You are my friend, my best friend, and you’re…well…you’re family, that’s how I feel, maybe you don’t, but…” You shrugged, blushing a deep red. “And I care for you, you know it, right? I care for you a lot, Daryl.” You really hoped he knew. “I don’t sleep next to you just because you keep me warm or even because it’s comforting. I sleep next to you because…I don’t know, because I like it, I like how it makes me feel, and I like it when you hug me, and I like hugging you, and…and yeah…”

You were feeling so shy and embarrassed, you thought your cheeks might be on fire, and you felt a bit like crying too, for whatever reason, you didn’t even understand yourself, but you kept going, letting all your confusing feelings out.

“And it’s not just sleeping. I like to be with you, and I like to talk to you, to listen to you, to spend time with you…you…kind of make me happy…so…so yeah…” You didn’t know what else you could say, and you rubbed your eyes, embarrassed. Daryl was looking at the ground, silent and unmoving. “So…so I’m sorry that you heard that, but I didn’t mean it that way…and I…I don’t know what else to say, just…I’m sorry.”

You turned around and rushed back into the cellblock, going back to your cell, and lying alone on the cold bed. You couldn’t help your tears. You had messed up everything, you had hurt Daryl, and lost what you two had.

You didn’t dwell in self-pity for long though, because then Daryl was walking into the cell. The bed dipped under his weight and he lied down next to you, his skin touching yours in the small bunk, and you rolled to face him, even though you could barely see him in the dark.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered.

“I’m too,” he whispered back, and he didn’t pull away when you caressed his face softly. You were so relieved you could cry.

“It’s not like that. Not just that. I promise,” you whispered and Daryl nodded, wrapping his arms around you, making you feel instantly better. For a little while, you stayed silent, and then you spoke again. “What it is, for you? This?”

“I don’t know…” You didn’t know what answer had been expecting, but that didn’t surprise you.

“But it’s not just you stopping me from freezing…” That’s what you had thought at first, though not anymore, not really. If it was just that, then he’d have stopped by now. Daryl must like to sleep with you too.

“No. It’s…it’s what you said…” Daryl shifted awkwardly. “I like to sleep with you, and…to be with you, and talk, and all that…I care for you…” You were feeling all kind of weird stuff in your belly at hearing Daryl fighting his shyness to tell you all that aloud. “I like it, when I’m with you.”

You didn’t know what to say, emotional as you were feeling, and you didn’t want to make Daryl more shy or awkward. Instead of saying anything, you searched for his hand, and you brought it up to your lips to kiss his knuckles softly. You heard Daryl gasp softly in surprise, and for a moment you were afraid you had made things wrong again, but then he was letting go of your hand to caress your hair softly.

“Daryl…” You whispered after a little while of thinking back and forth about your next words. You weren’t sure it was a good idea, but after everything you both had just shared, you felt like you needed to. You wanted to, even if it scared you, to admit it aloud to both you and to Daryl, even if it made you shy. “I think I’m a bit in love with you.”

Daryl didn’t say anything, and you tried not to be too disappointed. What were you expecting anyway…You decided to let it go, and try to sleep. Then Daryl’s hand traveled from your hair to your chin, warm fingers running over your skin softly, tilting your head up. You felt his lips on yours, then, soft and tentative, taking your breath away.

“Why you do that?” You asked when you finally could speak after he stunned you into silence with his kiss.

“I don’t know…felt like it…” You felt Daryl stiff again. “You don’t want it?”

“Oh, no, I do, I do want it, just…not expecting it…” You were still shy and shocked, but you couldn’t help but let out a giddy, surprised giggle. It was embarrassing, but you felt Daryl relax at it. “But I wanted it…I want to kiss you, and I want us to be together like…like not just sleeping next to each other, not just friends…but I understand if you don’t feel like-”

Daryl cut your awkward ramble by pressing his lips to yours again, almost making you gasp in surprise once more. “Stop it,” he whispered against your lips. “I…I want what you said too. Feel like you said…” He sounded shy, but genuine, and you thought you could just float of happiness at that moment.

Not knowing what else to say, you just kissed him. Daryl didn’t seem to mind it, kissing you back with more confidence this time, making you feel like you might just melt, and his arms wrapped tight around you, holding you to him.

*

The next morning, you were sat down next to Daryl having breakfast, after a night of trading kisses and just lying in each other arms, the feeling old but now new too, in a way. You looked at him and smiled softly, your grin going wider when he smiled back at you, looking at you in a way that made your heart skip a beat.

Maggie arched his eyebrows at you, seeming amused, and you rolled your eyes at her but couldn’t help your silly smile. You wanted to yell at her for the fight that you had with Daryl, but at the same time, it had forced you to make sense of your feelings, to admit it aloud, to tell Daryl. And it had been, so, so worthy.

You kissed Daryl’s cheek and he blushed, but he didn’t seem to mind, smiling shyly as he wrapped his arm around you, and you leaned your head onto his shoulder as you listened to Rick’s plans for the day, feeling Daryl’s warmth radiating from him like the first time he had held you, comforting, warming you from inside, feeling safer than in all your life.