Archive of Our Own ^beta

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The slamming of a door behind him shocked Jeremy out of his thoughts. “Well here we are!” Announced the lanky care worker that picked Jeremy up from the airport, Trevor if Jeremy remembers correctly. “You can meet everyone in the morning!” Trevor carries on unperturbed despite his lack of response, “You can have the spare room tonight as it’s so late but tomorrow we can get you set up in the Lads room”. "Yippee sharing" he thought sarcastically “this is gonna be worse than I thought at least last time I had my own room” he shuddered at that thought, nothing could be worse than last time.

“Jeremy, you okay” Trevor asked concerned, knowing his concern couldn’t be sincere Jeremy simply nodded and followed Trevor as he led him up a staircase that was surprisingly narrow considering the large size of the house, this place had to at least have 7 bedrooms. As they reached the first floor Jeremy could see there was at least one more, noticing his gaze Trevor whispered jokingly “You don’t wanna go up there just yet, it’s dangerous to wake a sleeping Ryan”. Hearing that name made him flinch before simply nodding, not recognising Trevors jesting tone, “you’ll be sleeping here tonight” Trevor said, seeming to realise he wasn’t going to get any sort of verbal response, he pointed at a small room with a single bed, nightstand, pale blue walls and light grey drapes.

“Well I’m sure you’re tired I’ll leave you to get some sleep, you can meet everyone at breakfast in the morning” Trevor carried on, slowly closing the door leaving Jeremy standing in the centre of the room. Jeremy seeing he was finally alone placed his faded purple rucksack, that had definitely seen better days, onto the floor next to the bed before walking over to the window. The night sky was even clearer here than it had been in Boston, far less city lights polluting the sky, yet the bright stars that should have been comforting, made the night sky seem foreboding. Here he was stuck in some random house in downtown Austin almost two thousand miles away from anything or anyone he's ever known, but maybe that was for the best.

Hearing a creak on the landing, he sprung towards the bed hurriedly shedding his thin jacket and placing it on the nightstand, not eager to be caught out of bed and be punished within his first hour at this home. As he got under the cover he realised this bedding had to be the softest and definitely the most expensive he’s ever been given. He froze debating what to do, "there’s no way they gave me these unless it’s a test" he thought, reluctantly getting out of bed to stand staring at the traitorous sheets. A little part of him wanted to get into the bed, screw whatever punishment it earned him but he knew better, he hadn’t survived so many homes by being reckless. Instead he shoved himself with his back against the wall between his nightstand and the bed, with a clear view of the door, using his jacket as a make-shift pillow he settled in for a long cold night.

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"You didn't see him, Burnie! He's so thin and he hasn't said a word since he got off the plane!" wow barely day two and he could hear people whispering about him, slowly awakening he recognised the loud whisper to be Trevor and he was apparently talking to someone called Burnie, he vaguely remembered that name from Trevor's ramblings on the car ride over, he was one of the care workers here along with some guy called Gus who he assumed was managing the ruckus he could hear downstairs in what must be the kitchen. "Oh God" ,he thought, "I must have over slept" how he'd managed that was beyond him as he could feel his back shoulder aching from the awkward position of his body between the furniture. He was brought out of his thoughts by Burnie replying to Trevor "Most of the kids barely spoke when they first got here, give him some time, he's a special case you know that". "Special case" nice I'm already going to be targeted there go my hopes of simply being ignored.

Suddenly the door opened revealing a tall dark haired guy standing next to Trevor, both their eyes immediately went to the bed before being drawn to his shivering form on the ground. "Jeremy, what happened?" Trevor asked concerned while rushing towards him causing Jeremy to flinch and scoot closer to the wall. Quickly Burnie grabbed Trevor's shoulder bringing him to a halt before slowly approaching Jeremy but kneeling a few feet away, "Hey" he said softly, "You wanna come down and get some food before the zoo consumes it all?" he asks with a gentle smile. Seeing his opportunity to avoid answering any questions Jeremy quickly nods and stands up staying a few feet away from both the adults, "Okay then, lead the way Trev" Burnie replies gently shoving Trevor in front of him and towards the stairs, Trevor seems to gain enthusiasm with his new task and bounds downstairs calling for everybody to save him some bacon. Reaching the bottom of the stair case Jeremy is hit with a new wall of noise, general breakfast conversation mixed with some argument over cereal and Trevor's own far too enthusiastic voice for this hour.

Seeing Jeremy a slight hush falls on the group, not everyone seems to get the message as two boys around his age continue their argument over what cereal to eat. "You guys could just eat different cereals" Burnie tells them while saving an unfortunate piece of toast that was to close to one of the boys ,with brown curly hair and glasses, wildly gesturing hands, "Burnie how could you even suggest such a thing" the other boy with messy brown hair replied sounding scandalised, "Me and Micool boy have to eat the same thing! Its part of the Lad Pact!"
"How could I forget" Burnie replied affectionately ruffling the boys hair as he squawked. Just seeming to remember him, Burnie moved to stand beside Jeremy and face the table before announcing "Guys this is Jeremy, he's gonna be staying in Michael and Gavin's room",
"The Lad Pad" interjected Michael,
"so be nice and introduce yourselves, don't act like a pack of wild animals", Burnie continued giving his interrupter a glare which made the boy he assumed was "Micool" grin happily.
"Well I'm Bruce and I'm 16" started a taller dark haired teenage boy who was stood next to the fridge, "and that's James he's 14" he continued gesturing towards a boy a bit older than himself who was preoccupied creating some sort of concoction involving kale and raw eggs in a blender.
"Im Alfredo AKA The Sauce and I'm 12" carried on another boy, "Gus just took Ryan, Jack and Geoff to the book store",
"You mean the Gents" prompted the boy Jeremy assumed to be Gavin.
"Whatever you say" Alfredo replied smiling before returning to munching n his breakfast.
"Well obviously I'm Gavin and I'm 11 and this is Micool who is 12 and you're gonna be our new Lad" Gavin said enthusiastically, "We tried to get Fredo but he said we were to crazy", he carried on frowning slightly before smiling manically. Just as he was about to continue he was interrupted by Trevor's phone ringing, "Guys time to get to the centre if you wanna play basket ball" he said to Bruce and James who immediately started racing towards the door, tripping each other as they went. "Jeremy why don't you help yourself to whatever you like" Trevor said to him as hurried out the door to ensure nothing would be broken by Bruce and James.

"Jeremy come sit next to us" Gavin called, causing him to tentatively slide onto the seat on the edge of the table, "As its your first day as a lad you can pick what we eat" subtly nudging his chosen box of cereal towards him.
"Yeah Lil' J you pick" Michael furthered plonking his box directly in front of him with a distinct lack of subtlety, Jeremy decided to ignore what was no doubt an insult about his height and with barely a glance at either boxes pointed towards Michael's box, he seemed far more likely to be aggressive than Gavin and he didn't want to start a fight already. This caused Michael to let out a loud whoop like he'd won gold and Gavin to slightly pout before loading his bowl up so it was almost overflowing, Michael following suit, leaving him to timidly pour a small portion of cereal in his own bowl all the while glancing round to see if anyone was gonna stop him. After a few minutes of him quietly eating while Michael and Gavin shovelled as much cereal into their mouths as they could all the while talking to him about school and how he was most likely gonna be in the same class as them since they mixed grades. Once they'd all finished Michael charged off yelling about giving him a tour while Gavin gently grabbed his hand a pulled him along and back up the stairs.

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It was about half way through the tour when everything went down hill, just as well we'd made it to our room, Michael thought, it woulda been bad if we were on the gents floor with Ryan being so strict about his privacy, but then again maybe not. The tour had been going well with Jeremy following along quietly, Gavin holding his hand pulling him along, they'd decided to show him the house from the top down so they'd already been to the club house in the attic where they had a chill out area with a pool table and bean bags as well as an xbox and computer for game nights and homework respectively. They'd quickly pointed out each of the gents rooms explaining that they could only go in if they were specifically invited "Or for an awesome prank" as Gavin had interjected.

They heard the gents and Gus arrive back but by then they were busy in the "Lad Pad" where Gavin was showing Jeremy each of his pet rocks and explaining where he found them, when the front door opened with a loud bangs signalling the arrival of Bruce and James ,who were in the midst of a loud argument about a foul, with Trevor who was trying to calm each of them down to no avail. Both Gavin and Michael walked towards the stairs in order to hear more about what was going on but when they returned Jeremy was no where to be found, Michael cursed himself he knew what it was like to live in a home where all loud noise definitely meant pain, knowing that Jeremy definitely wouldn't appreciate him getting any of the adults at the moment he quickly explained to Gavin that they were gonna have to find him quickly.

After about ten minutes of searching Michael was close to tears, they’d searched every room they could think of, except... “The attic” Michael almost yelled at Gavin who answered equally as loud, “YES” as they both sprinted up the stairs almost knocking Trevor flying. As soon as they reached the attic the relief Michael felt at seeing Jeremy vanished almost immediately. “Jeremy, you okay?” He asked the new lad softly seeing how he was jammed underneath the pool table in the corner of the attic. Receiving no answer Michael was at a loss of what to do until Gavin quietly stepped by him and sat on the floor leaning against the pool table before quietly talking to Jeremy about anything he could think of, from his origins in England to how awesome the color purple is, after about five minutes of this he quietly looked up seeing Michael hadn’t moved asked him to go get one of the gents, preferably Geoff.

Michael could've slapped himself of course they should get Geoff! He usually knows what to do whenever they need to talk about anything the gents are usually the ones they go to, not that they couldn’t go to one of the adults it’s just some things they’d rather keep out of their files. Reaching Jacks room, where the gents usually hang out, he shakes himself out of his thoughts before opening the door hastily.

“Michael we’ve talked about knocking”, Jack said exasperated. But upon seeing his panic quickly amended, “what’s wrong?” he asked with his voice full of concern. “Something’s wrong with Jeremy!” He answered looking around at both Geoff and Ryan. Geoff noticing Ryan’s flinch at Jeremys name gave him an inquisitive look which was ignored so he decided to focus on Michael as he started ranting with his hands flying wildly. “Where is he?” Geoff asked as all the gents got up and rushed after Michael as he took off in lieu of answering.

As they reached the top of the attic steps they all froze looking at the scene, there was a small skinny kid, Jeremy his brain supplied, wedged under the pool table visibly shaking While Gavin was next to him quietly talking. What shocked him the most was when Ryan stepped forward quickly but apprehensively lowering himself towards the floor before placing his forehead on Jeremys. None of them had seen Ryan make physical contact with someone so fast, sure he hugged the lads almost daily but that was something that only began after him being there for almost a year.

Shocked at feeling someone so close Jeremy was pulled from his cycle of panic, ready to fight or run, he opened his eyes. Hardly believing the sight before him, he froze staring at the boy in front of him, “Ryan is that you?” he asked timidly.

“Of corse it is, battle buddies for life, right J?”was all the reassurance he needed as he launched himself out of under the pool table and straight at Ryan both of them hugging the other tightly lest they be separated like before. They were both reminded of the other people in the room by a throat clearing, “I’m guessing you guys know each other” Said Michael, intrigue and relief obvious in his voice.

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“How do you know the kid?” Geoff asked his voice full of concern. Honestly Ryan was surprised they’d lasted this long before questioning him. After their reunion earlier Jeremy had been his shadow for the rest of the day, not speaking to anyone, despite all their attempts, just hiding behind Ryan which earned him a number of confused looks all round especially from the carers. Jeremy had finally left his side a few minutes ago after Trevor suggested he go get ready for bed with the other lads, which had caused an obvious struggle for Jeremy, obviously not wanting to leave Ryan’s side but also knowing better than to ignore a command, he was saved from deciding by Gavin simply grabbing his hand and pulling him out of the room while Michael ran ahead yelling about how awesome his first night would be in the ‘Lad Pad’.

He was pulled from his thoughts by a concerned hand on his shoulder, blinking himself out of his reverie he saw both Jack and Geoff sat on the small couch they’d managed to persuade Trevor they needed for their hangouts in Jacks room. “If you don’t feel like talking you don’t have to” Jack said kindly, shooting a glare at Geoff. “Nah it’s okay it’s just I haven’t seen him in almost 2 years”, Ryan answered surprised to hear his voice was trembling even after all this time remembering anything to do with his first foster mom made him emotional, Jack and Geoff both watched him with sad eyes both of them obviously putting the dates together from when Ryan had told them about his only real foster mom. “When Jeremy first came to us it took me ages to break through to him” Ryan carried on.

———————————-Flashback———————

“You need anymore souls over there buddy” asked Ryan, looking at the rather impressive blood altar Jeremy had built despite his very limited knowledge of the game, he’d been reluctant to start him off playing sky factory rather than a vanilla version but he couldn’t wait any longer to play the new mod Kate had downloaded for them. “You can never have too many souls” Jeremy answered in the happiest voice Ryan had heard out of him since he arrived a month ago, video games had definitely been a good idea.

After a while of continuing to build their new world they heard the front door slam which Ryan thought nothing of till he looked around in game and saw Jeremy’s castaway character just standing getting eaten by a zombie. He quickly dropped his controller just now noticing Jeremys absence from the sofa beside him, seeing Jeremy backed into the corner of the living room made his heart squeeze, he still didn’t fully understand all the evils that had affected the younger boy but he’d be damned if that was gonna stop him from helping his buddy. Quickly approaching the boy he gently bumped their shoulders before speaking, “you know Kate would never hurt you, she’s the kindest person I’ve ever met plus I promised you I’d never let my battle buddy get hurt and I keep my promises”, upon hearing the new name Ryan had created for their ‘team’ a small smile made its way onto Jeremys face.

The name had come from a sleep devoid night from nightmares, which had led to Ryan telling him about the accident that killed his parents and after a while Jeremy had given in and told him about group homes with too little resources and too many kids and a ‘family’ which reveled in violence giving him dreams of blood splattered floor and angry voices, after learning the minimal details the boy was willing to share Ryan had promised to protect his little brother no matter what.

——————End Of Flashback—————————

“I promised him he’d never have to go back, but I was just a stupid kid” Ryan carried on his voice turning bitter “Almost as soon as he’d stopped jumping at every loud noise, Kate got sick so the social worker came and said she had great news, that Jeremys old foster family would take him back and wasn’t he so lucky”, he was almost spitting the words out at this point. “No matter how much I protested and tried to tell them what Jeremy had told me, nobody listened and I was forced to stand their screaming as they took him away. You should have seen the kids face as they took him back he didn’t make a sound like he knew he was always gonna end up back in that hell hole”. “Kate tried to help him but she was too sick and once she died I promised myself I wouldn’t speak another word, she was the only one who listened to me about him and now there was no one left who would help him”.

Jack and Geoff sat there in horrified silence, sure they knew when Ryan first arrived he refused to talk but no one had any idea as to why. After a few seconds Jack got out of his seat and enveloped Ryan in a hug before whispering “Thank you for breaking your promise and talking again”. Ryan shrugged “If it wasn’t for you guys I probably wouldn’t have spoken for much longer”.

A heavy silence descended only to be interrupted by Geoff, “You know how to help him then?” Geoff asked sounding hopeful, he’d never seen a kid so young so scared. “I don’t know, when I met him he’d only been in that foster home for a few months but now he’s spent years in that place and I’ve no clue how to get through to him” Ryan replied sounding on the verge of tears. “But this time you have us” Jack said firmly, him and Geoff both moving to sit either side of him, “You’re not alone”.

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The following days followed a tenuous routine, Jeremy stayed Ryan’s shadow following him throughout the house but bolting anytime a door slammed or an argument broke out. All the kids tried to involve Jeremy in whatever they were doing, the lads with whatever video game they happen to be playing, the gents with games or trips to the store and James and Bruce inviting him to play basketball with them or to go and visit their friend Adam, who he was told they knew from a previous foster home but was moved out of state so they lost touch. The name sounded vaguely familiar to Jeremy which was never a good thing in his experience so he decided to avoid the pair to avoid any chance of meeting this Adam. While no one had hurt him yet he knew appearances could be deceiving so he decided to try to be as invisible as possible which proved to conflict with the plans of others much to his dismay.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~*****~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was the Friday after Jeremy first arrived when Geoff decided he needed to do something about the fact he’d barely been able to say two words to the new kid, he decided as he always did to vent his worries to Jack.

“He’s barely even spoken to Ryan, Jack!” Geoff finally exploded as Jack just sat passively at his desk watching the other boy pace. “How are we supposed to help him when he won’t even talk to us!”, he huffed as he sat down on the bed across from Jack giving him an unimpressed glare. In return Jack simply raised an eyebrow before stating “You do realise we’re not really responsible for this kid?” In return he received yet another glare. “Fine but you know it’s going to take a while for Jeremy to get used to this place, hell at least he isn’t half as bad as you used to be!”, this received a smirk from Geoff as his eyes clouded in remembrance “I was a little bit destructive in the beginning”, this prompted a disbelieving snort from Jack “You put a brick through Burnie’s car windscreen! All because he said you had to do the dishes”.

Geoff simply rolled his eyes “yes we all know I had a bit of an anger problem but let’s get back on topic here!”

“You do realise we’ve done some of this before, we did this with Ryan, it just takes time and patience”, Jack replied looking increasingly exasperated. “This is different and you know it! Ryan didn’t jump at every noise and disappear where no one can find him, not even Burnie or Gus!” Geoff replied looking despairingly at Jack before staring at Jack’s collection of photo’s that featured the three gents as well as the rest of the group.

“Well we just need to get him to spend time with someone even if it’s just one of the lads” Jack replied looking thoughtful.
“Let’s hope for Gavin rather than Michael” Geoff stated smiling as he stood making for the door, “what are you doing now?” Jack asked as he reluctantly got up to follow. “Do you know what can solve everything?” Geoff asked with a grin, “VIDEOGAMES” he yelled out without waiting for a response as he took off down the stair heading for the lads room, “I’ve got the lads and Ryan, you’re on James, Bruce and the overlords!”, he called his voice echoing in the stair way. Snorting at Geoffs newest name for the carers he made his own way down the stairs at a much more sedate pace.

Reaching the living room and finding James, Bruce and Trevor watching a documentary on penguins he cleared his throat loudly, “Geoff’s declared Video Games so anyone who wants to join should be upstairs in five minutes”, in response all three jumped up and rushed for the stairs, seeing Trevor along with the boys he huffed a laugh and made his way to Burnie’s office. Knocking lightly before opening the door he waved a hello at both Burnie and Gus who paused their conversation to greet him, before repeating his earlier message, receiving confirmations from both men he retreated back up the stairs.

Seeing the gathering upstairs made a smile light up his face, James and Bruce on the bean bags at the side while the lads were spread across the sofa cracking jokes as Geoff and Ryan bantered at one another as they set up the games console. Seeing a flicker of movement at the side of the room he noticed Jeremy hovering uncertainly eyeing each individual as if deciding whether any were a threat before glancing at the door, before he lost his chance Jack caught his eye before gesturing to the set of chairs with clear access to the exit as well as the screen. Jeremy still seemed hesitant so Jack tried to send him his most reassuring look as he sat and patted the chair next to him, he tried to contain his delight as he saw Jeremy inch closer before perching on the edge of the seat closest to the door. He almost hugged the boy before restraining himself, small steps he thought, small steps.

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I’ve loved writing this fic (despite my unreliable updates) but considering recent events I’ve decided to abandon it, at least temporarily, until I feel comfortable either editing, rewriting it completely or perhaps continuing it as it is. I hope you all understand and I would appreciate you guys letting me know what you think I should do.

Much love, Phoenix