Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

"look, kid, i really can't hire you to bartend when you don't look old enough to drink yourself."

"i'm nineteen."

"yes, you've told me that many times. i wanna help, but there's really not much i can do here."

yoongi walked in for his friday night shift at epiphany, namjoon in tow. he heard the voices immediately when he opened the front door. the first one was seokjin, without a doubt, the owner of the bar, his boss and one of his closest friends. the other voice he couldn't recognize. namjoon and yoongi eyed each other, confused, and proceeded to the main room to find out what was happening.

yoongi saw a tall figure leaning on the counter from the customers' side, while seokjin was behind it, already starting preparations for the night. when they walked closer, he could see the lines between seokjin's perfect eyebrows when he huffed at the person standing opposite of him, clearly conflicted. the stranger had to be a beta, since yoongi couldn't detect any other scents than jimin's floral one. the omega must've arrived early for his shift.

"how about this? i know some people, leave me your number and i'll give you a call if i hear about something that would suit you."

the stranger deflated visibly. then he shrugged and quickly scribbled something down on a napkin he'd grabbed from the side and slid it over the counter to seokjin.

the older man eyed the other with sympathetic eyes. "need a drink? on the house."

seokjin didn't let even his employees drink on the house. except on birthdays. what was going on?

the beta huffed out a humorless laugh. "thought i wasn't old enough to drink?"

"i said you don't look old enough, now know you are. it's nothing personal, you do understand that we have to keep up our appearances." seokjin was setting down a coaster and a beer on top of it. yoongi could tell it was from their more expensive selection. huh. seokjin really did feel bad for this kid. yoongi wondered what was the story here while he slipped to the back to change into more appropriate working attire. namjoon had beelined to the counter to meet his boyfriend. yoongi shook his head. how the two got any work done when their establishments were located in the same block, yoongi had yet to find out. seokjin was always slipping out to namjoon's tattoo shop around the corner and namjoon more often than not got taehyung to open up for him so he could hang at the bar for as long as he could before going to work himself.

"what's going on out there?" he asked after spotting jimin at the back, lounging on one of the leather couches. the omega was scrolling through his phone absentmindedly, his blonde hair falling in front of his eyes. he raised his head and his eyes flitted to the door that was still swinging after yoongi.

"i didn't really pay attention. some beta kid waltzed in like half an hour ago and has been bothering jin-hyung about a job since then." jimin's brow furrowed in thought. "he seemed really desperate."

"wonder what's his story," yoongi hummed while throwing off his hoodie and replacing it with a black t-shirt with the bar's logo on it.

"since when do you care about random strangers so much?" jimin smirked. "got a good look at him yet?"

"no." yoongi rolled his eyes and checked his appearance from the mirror. his hair looked like he'd just gotten out of bed. great. he tried to flatten it to look at least somewhat presentable. jin wasn't really on their asses about personal appearances, but he still tried not to look like an electrocuted cat when he walked behind the counter every friday.

"shame he's so young. wouldn't have minded a little eye-candy around here," jimin hummed, fixing his attention back to his phone screen.

yoongi scoffed at the omega. "you make it sound like the rest of us are all hideous."

"hate to break it to you, hyung, but you're not really my type," jimin smirked. "but seriously, the kid was cute. go see for yourself."

yoongi rolled his eyes again. inevitable occurrence when talking with the omega. they'd been working together for close to a year now and yoongi still wasn't able to quite detect when jimin was being serious and when he was just spewing nonsense with the teasing little lilt in his voice. "i'm going, but to work, not to ogle at some random kid. hope he's gone by now, otherwise hyung might down the whole prime selection down his throat."

"mm-hmm," jimin hummed and eyed him with a familiar glimmer in his eyes. yoongi sighed and walked back into the main room.

the kid was still there, flinching a little at the sudden creek of the swinging door when yoongi walked in. namjoon had taken a seat beside him, but the stranger didn't seem so responsive to namjoon's conversational advances. seokjin had disappeared, probably to get refills from the storage room. yoongi took his spot behind the counter, nodding at namjoon, who seemed a little lost, like he wasn't sure what to do, left alone with the strange beta.

yoongi grabbed a towel and swung it on his shoulder. he arranged the row or glasses like he wanted on the corner and started checking that everything was filled and ready for the night. he listened with half an ear to the conversation going on on his left. if it could be described as a conversation. namjoon asked a question, and the beta hummed or grunted as a response. he had his face now hidden inside a black hood, so yoongi couldn't see much more than the corner of his jaw. yoongi would've started questioning his ability to speak if he hadn't heard his voice loud and clear when he'd walked in the first time.

"so, why do you need a job so bad, anyway?" namjoon was asking.

the stranger flipped his head up and the hood slid off his head. yoongi's breath got caught in his throat.

"why does anyone need a job?"

this stranger was maybe the most attractive person yoongi had ever seen. damn jimin for being right, again. he had these big, beautiful brown eyes yoongi found himself drowning in. yes, he seemed young, seokjin had been right about that, but not in an innocent, child-like way. yoongi couldn't quite grasp it, but there was something in the beta's whole being that captured his attention. suddenly, the stranger's gaze flitted onto yoongi and he flipped his head down like he'd been burned. why exactly did he do that, yoongi couldn't say. there was something in those eyes.

"i'm looking for a new place to stay, and for that, i need money," the stranger clarified. yoongi looked at him from the corner of his eyes and found that the beta was still looking at him.

"you happen to know anything about tattooing?" namjoon asked, brow furrowed in thought. "i own a shop just around the corner from here, we could use some help even if you don't."

if they had ears, yoongi swore the beta's would've turned right up at that. he shifted his eyes back to namjoon. "i do, kinda? i've done some on myself, but i'm not sure if they're any good. i'm a fast learner, though."

namjoon laughed, amused at the kid's newfound enthusiasm. "can you show me?"

yoongi dropped his eyes to the floor when the stranger started ripping off his hoodie. he knew both namjoon and the kid were betas and thus, couldn't detect shifts in scents, but the backroom was just a few meters away and yoongi wasn't about to give jimin the satisfaction.

namjoon whistled and yoongi just couldn't help his curiosity and he glanced at the kid. okay, maybe he should stop calling him that. what the hell he had those arms for?

the beta had some kind of flowers tattooed on his forearm, coupled with some lettering in english yoongi couldn't translate. yoongi was no expert in tattooing, but even he could safely say that those looked good. and judging from namjoon's widened eyes, they were really good.

"you did these yourself?"

the stranger shrugged. "i've got some more, but they're kinda unfinished and i'm not about to start stripping right here on the counter." yoongi gulped at that. "but this is my favorite."

"kid, if you want a job, you've got it," namjoon still sounded unbelieving. "this is some really good work. have you been tattooing for long?"

"since i was fourteen. mainly on myself and a few friends. i knew someone who was an artist."

namjoon shook his head, still staring at the shaded flowers. "wow. if you want, you can come with me right away? i don't have clients today and i can show you the place?"

yoongi had never seen someone move so fast. the kid was up on his feet in a second, nodding his head, pretty eyes wide.

namjoon waved yoongi goodbye and stopped to give a peck to his boyfriend's cheek who had just walked out of the storage room. then the two betas rushed out and left seokjin and yoongi equally dumbfounded, staring after them.

"what was that?" seokjin turned to yoongi.

"i guess you've got a new son," yoongi smirked, trying to hide the fact that he was still recovering. those eyes were illegal. and the way they'd lit up when namjoon had offered him the job. like a dozen stars lighting up at the sky.

yoongi blinked and shook himself out of his thoughts. what the actual hell was he thinking? he'd never been more glad about the fact that his coworkers were mostly betas.

jimin eyed him knowingly when he slipped beside him at the counter five minutes before opening time. damn that kid and his good nose.

***

"he's like, insanely talented," taehyung flailed his hands around and jimin quickly slid to the side before he was splattered with his friend's spilling drink. "i've been doing this professionally for five years and i'm not nearly as good at shading as he is. and he did it. on. himself. like how?"

yoongi sipped his beer and smiled at his friend. "maybe he lied? how do you know if he has done this before or not?"

jimin glared at yoongi. "always the pessimist. why would he lie?"

yoongi shrugged. "hell if i know. just seemed odd."

"well, jeongguk might be a little closed off, but he's a good kid." namjoon sat at the table. they were all gathered together like they had every friday for as long as yoongi could remember. it was the only day of the week they all got off work at the same time and so, it'd been deemed the official day for afterworks. seokjin was still at the back doing inventory with hoseok, but the rest of them were sitting at one of the tables, beers in hand and listening to taehyung's ranting about the new addition to their little circle.

"i'm gonna need him to do something on me," taehyung continued, not paying much attention to the rest of them, he seemed to be absolutely enamored by his new coworker.

"jeongguk? so that's his name," yoongi hummed and jimin eyed him, the familiar glint in his eyes.

"you were wondering?"

"what?" yoongi perked up at that. "no, i mean, he didn't really introduce himself when he was here so i just—"

jimin laughed, bright and cheerful. "it's okay hyung, i'm just teasing."

"the lack of respect here is astonishing," yoongi muttered into his beer and jimin just rolled his eyes, a smile ever present on his lips.

"anyway," namjoon eyed the two of them. "i'd like to invite him to our place this sunday. everyone okay with that?"

sundays were their other weekly tradition. at first it had been only namjoon, seokjin and yoongi, the three of them being friends from college, then later, when seokjin took over epiphany after his brother moved back to korea, jimin and hoseok had joined the group. taehyung was the latest addition, he came to work for namjoon straight out of high school, opting out of university to chase his passion of being a tattoo artist. after that, the group of six had been inseparable.

"of course you should invite him!" taehyung seemed almost offended.

"fine by me," jimin smiled. "i'm looking forward to actually meeting this new prodigy of yours."

seokjin and hoseok, who joined them just then, agreed too, seokjin almost matching taehyung with his enthusiasm. all five pairs of eyes then turned to yoongi. he blinked.

"what? yeah, of course, if he wants to come."

taehyung scoffed. "why wouldn't he? we're awesome."

the night continued with less jeongguk-talk and by two o'clock, yoongi was pleasantly buzzed, all warm and happy and smiling at his friends' antics. he'd missed this. he had spent so much time lately with his music, cooped up in his tiny home-studio, that he had missed out on their friday nights for a few weeks in row. yoongi made a mental note to start spending more time with his friends. it didn't hurt to have some fun once in a while.

seokjin stayed back to lock up the place, yoongi volunteering to help. namjoon hanged back too, waiting patiently for his boyfriend to check the place thoroughly before leaving. the other three were rooming together and thus, shared an uber back to their place. seokjin and namjoon had an apartment above the bar and they waved yoongi goodbye as he started to head home. he didn't live far, so he decided to walk.

yoongi was digging for his keys outside of his building's front door when he spotted someone slumped against the brick wall, a few meters to the side. he wouldn't normally pay much attention to something like that, he didn't live in exactly one of the best neighborhoods, and he'd seen worse in the three years he'd had this apartment. but something in the person hugging his knees to his chest caught yoongi's attention. he couldn't detect a scent, but the smell of blood was unmistakable.

"hey," he started softly, taking a few steps toward the figure. "are you okay?"

the person snapped his head up and yoongi froze in place. he'd know those eyes anywhere. a little less starry than they'd been last he saw them, and a nasty bruise forming up around the left one, but still, he was as mesmerized by them as he'd been last week at the bar.

"jeongguk," he rushed to kneel beside the kid. "what are you doing here? what happened?"

the kid flinched away from him and dropped his eyes to the ground. "i— i'm fine." his voice wavered a little.

"you don't look like it." yoongi eyed the boy. he had blood drying up on his hairline, a few drops dripping down the side of his face. "look, i live just up there, come inside?"

jeongguk lifted his gaze up and his eyes flitted between yoongi and the door behind him. "why?"

yoongi stared at him, confused. "why? because you're bleeding, you look like you've been run over by a truck and i wanna help you. at least let me clean those up." he gestured towards his face.

jeongguk still seemed suspicious, but he rose up, slightly wobbly on his feet. yoongi made sure the kid was following, and led them in, up the stairs and into his apartment. it was nothing out of the ordinary, a tiny two-bedroom, with the other one turned into a makeshift studio. yoongi gestured toward the living room and went to rummage through his kitchen cabinets, looking for a first-aid kit and some disinfectant.

jeongguk was sitting on the couch when yoongi came back with his haul. he set the supplies on the coffee table and wetted a pad of cotton with the disinfectant fluid. jeongguk didn't make a single sound while yoongi was cleaning the cut on his hairline, just sat there, jaw tightening a little.

"so," yoongi spoke silently, trying not to spook the kid. somehow he felt like he was dealing with a wild animal that could fling away in a second if he made the wrong move. he suspected that feeling wasn't so far from the reality here. "wanna tell me what happened? it's okay if you don't."

jeongguk was silent for a while, wringing his hands together on his lap. yoongi noticed a couple of cuts and bruising there too. he picked a fresh pad from the pile and took one of jeongguk's hands in his own, carefully tapping the blood away.

"i just— i was in the wrong place at a wrong time," the beta sniffled a little. yoongi glanced at his downturned eyes. "it's not like i've never been in a fight before."

"this happen a lot?" yoongi hummed.

"not anymore, no." jeongguk tilted his head and winced, screwing his eyes shut.

"we should go to the hospital, you might have a concussion." yoongi rose up to get a better look at the kid's head but he flinched backwards, away from yoongi's touch.

"no hospitals. i didn't hit my head, i just get these headaches sometimes," he was quick to explain.

yoongi hummed and decided to let it go. he gathered the supplies and went to put them back to their places. he contemplated whether he should call namjoon, but the kid had been so reluctant to accept help from yoongi, he doubted inviting more people to this would be a good idea.

jeongguk was standing up when he got back to the living room. the kid seemed lost, wide eyes flitting around the room. yoongi was again reminded of a startled animal.

"do you live far from here? you can stay the night, of course, if you wanna, the couch is all yours," yoongi offered, still cautious of not making any sudden movements.

jeongguk was silent again, biting his bottom lip, buried in thought. finally he spoke, glancing at yoongi. "why are you being so nice to me? you don't even know me."

yoongi sighed. "you work for one of my best friends. apart from me getting my ass kicked if i'd let you go back wandering to the streets, you seem like a good kid. there's no reason for me not to help you, really." he then realized he hadn't even introduced himself properly before dragging the kid inside. "i'm yoongi, by the way."

"i know. namjoon-hyung talks a lot about you." jeongguk plopped down on the couch. "fine. i promise i'll be out of your hair first thing in the morning."

"that's not necessary," yoongi was quick to assure. "i'll get you some clean clothes. the shower is that way, make yourself at home."

jeongguk accepted the clothes and a towel yoongi brought to him and slipped into the bathroom. yoongi stood leaning against the kitchen counter, warming up some water for tea, lost in thought. what was this kid mixed up in? he'd said it wasn't the first time. yoongi had no details about what had happened, but judging from his knuckles, jeongguk wasn't the only one with a bruised face. yoongi didn't want to think badly about the kid his friends seemed so fond of, but he couldn't help but worry that the kid might actually be trouble. what did they know about him, really? he'd been working for namjoon for only a week.

he was shaken up from his thoughts by the sound of soft steps padding into the living room. yoongi peeked in on his way to his studio.

"there's tea for you on the kitchen counter. help yourself if you're hungry, there's some leftovers in the fridge. i'm gonna work for a while, but i'll use headphones so i won't be bothering you."

jeongguk was toweling his damp hair and yoongi swore he could detect a slight citrusy smell, which was odd, cause he didn't remember owning any products with that specific fragrance. he could be wrong, though. yoongi tried to keep his eyes from not flitting over the beta's form, but he couldn't help but notice how tiny his waist was compared to his shoulders and well-defined thighs. yoongi's clothes weren't exactly the right size, even though he'd picked his largest pair of sweatpants. jeongguk nodded, not meeting his eyes and muttered a small 'thank you'. yoongi tore his eyes away from the kid and slipped inside his studio, shaking his head at himself. what the hell was wrong with him? and what was it about this strange beta that made him act like this?

***

jeongguk was gone in the morning when yoongi woke up. well, it wasn't exactly morning anymore, but by yoongi's standards, waking up before noon was unacceptable. he made his way to the kitchen and turned the coffee maker on. yoongi's eyes flitted over to the living room. the blankets were folded neatly on one end of the couch, pillow on top of them. it was like jeongguk had never been here at all.

yoongi was on his fourth cup of coffee when his phone rang. it took a while to locate the device under all the sheets of paper spread over his desk, but finally he grabbed the buzzing thing.

"hi joon."

"took you long enough," namjoon chuckled at the other end. "let me guess, some track kicking your ass again?"

"about to be. i swear if i don't figure this bridge out in the next half an hour, i'm gonna lose it," yoongi huffed to the phone and fiddled with his notebook absentmindedly.

"sounds like you're right on time then. you still coming tomorrow?"

"yeah." yoongi twirled around on his chair. he started to feel a headache coming his way. maybe it wasn't such a great idea to drink a pot of coffee for breakfast and then proceed to stare at a screen for five hours.

"good. i'm trying to get a hold of jeongguk, but his phone is off. tae is working tonight with him, i'll ask him to send a message." yoongi was only half listening. his brain wandered off to last night at the mention of jeongguk. he had still to decide whether he should tell the rest of his friends what had happened. only yoongi wasn't even sure what all that had been about, so it wasn't exactly an easy decision to make. he didn't want to go jumping to conclusions, but the whole thing had been suspicious at least.

"hyung, are you listening?"

yoongi blinked. he'd totally zoned out for a minute. "yeah, what did you say?"

"i asked if you wanted help with the track."

"mm, not really. i'm sure it'll come. preferably some time today," yoongi huffed, staring at the stubborn couple of notes on his notebook page. he was old fashioned, maybe, but he liked putting the notes on paper first. it felt more personal, more authentic.

"okay." namjoon hesitated for a moment. "don't work too hard. and remember to eat. i bet you've only drank like two pots of coffee today?"

"only one," yoongi hummed, already slipping back to work-mode. namjoon sighed on the other end.

"see you tomorrow hyung. don't be late."

"see ya."

yoongi dropped his phone on the table and started vigorously scribbling. he was frustrated, he knew the answer was somewhere inside of his brain, but it refused to come out. those were the kinds of days he hated. a pair of starry eyes flashed in his mind. okay no, he had to concentrate on his actual work, now was not the time to daydream about anyone, no matter how cute and hot and tiny-waisted they were.

yoongi threw his notebook on the side and massaged his temples with the tips of his fingers. he wasn't going to get anything done like this. maybe namjoon's idea of dinner wasn't so bad. though it was more like lunch for yoongi.

he had just turned the rice cooker on when the doorbell rang. yoongi smiled to himself and rolled his eyes. namjoon was bound to worry, but to actually come and check up on him was a bit much. he walked to the hallway and was in the middle of figuring out how to reassure his friend that he was really fine and there was no need to come all this way, but all the words died in his throat as he opened the door.

"jeongguk?"

the beta smiled at him, timidly, holding a plastic bag in his hands. "hi," he said, voice low, eyes on the ground.

"what? did something happen?" yoongi was busy gathering himself and so, he just stared as jeongguk handed him the bag.

jeongguk shrank into himself a little more when yoongi made no move to take a hold of it. "the clothes? i'm here to return the clothes you lent to me."

yoongi snapped out of his haze. "oh, i'm sorry, i didn't expect- do you wanna come inside? i'm making dinner."

jeongguk seemed to be considering accepting yoongi's offer, but still, he shook his head and took a step backwards, as if to put some space between them. yoongi flitted his eyes over the younger.

"are you coming tomorrow?"

jeongguk's brow furrowed a little. "coming where?"

"to namjoon's and seokjin's? tae didn't ask you yet? namjoon has been trying to call you, he said your phone is off."

"ah," jeongguk was wringing his hands together in front of him. why was he being so nervous, yoongi had no idea. yeah, he'd been closed off and acted with major suspicion last night, but now he seemed… shy? "i haven't been to work yet, i came to drop these off first. and i guess i left my phone at work yesterday."

"it's okay." yoongi's instincts were screaming at him, trying to get him to release calming pheromones in the air. those wouldn't help, they only worked on alphas and omegas. it was weird, suddenly getting that feeling, for many reasons, but yoongi was mostly distracted by the fact that this didn't happen often. his alpha was the silent, broody type, not easily provoked and people often wrote him off as a beta, based on his mellow behavior. so he didn't quite get why his inner wolf decided to try to claw his way out of yoongi's chest right now. maybe it was just that jeongguk seemed so lost, so out of place and tense that his alpha felt obligated to try to help. yoongi tried his best to ignore it.

"what's tomorrow then?" the younger asked, meeting yoongi's eyes for the first time in this conversation.

"oh," yoongi was snapped out of his thoughts again. it had become a habit, apparently, to lose his head in the presence of this strange beta. "it's just our weekly get-together. food, some wine, movies, just hanging around. seokjin is a really good cook, you should come."

"me?" jeongguk looked at him with slightly widened eyes. yoongi couldn't quite count the sparkles in them, thanks to the dim lighting of the hallway, but he swore they were brighter than a minute ago.

"yeah, you." yoongi smiled. okay, what was it with him and those eyes? yoongi was beginning to think they held some kind of magical power, as he found himself adding: "and i'd really like it if you came."

"well then, i suppose i could," jeongguk was smiling this tiny little shy smile again. yoongi was beginning to like this jeongguk. he was less moody, more open, easier to get a hold of, to understand. yoongi'd always had a bit of a hard time with betas. his whole family consisted of alphas and omegas and he'd never learnt to actually read peoples' emotions from the way they were acting and speaking, it was just easier when he could sense the change in their scent.

"see you tomorrow, then. are you sure you don't want to come inside for a bit?"

jeongguk shook his head, his smile a little apologetic now. "i really have to get to work. thank you, though, for the invitation. and for letting me stay last night."

yoongi assured him it'd been no problem and as he closed the door and leaned his back against it, he found his mind drifting again. he felt like he was pulled in two directions. one of them the weird protectiveness he felt for the kid, considering they'd only met like three times now. and his alpha was acting out, which was the first time, for like, ever? but still, jeongguk was a stranger to them all. yoongi didn't really know him. he could be real trouble. yoongi hadn't always been a prime citizen himself and he didn't want to be quick to judge someone without knowing the whole story, but he was concerned, mainly for his friends. they got attached so easily and yoongi was worried what would happen if jeongguk actually turned out to be a bad guy.

he sighed and wandered back to the kitchen, just in time for the rice to be done. he grabbed some leftovers from the fridge and heated them up. with his haul, he walked back to his studio, his mind suddenly filled with ideas. maybe he should just mind his own business for now and not worry so much. time would tell, anyway.

Chapter Text

Chapter Text

he was running. he felt the soft ground under him, the thump of his steps in his ears. he felt the wind on his face, the chill of the night as he breathed in the cold air. he was running, running with the breeze, his steps feather-light, he was running until it felt like he was flying.

and then he stopped. he stopped and turned his head up into the night sky. there was nothing, no moon, no stars, just deep, deep darkness. the ground didn't feel soft under him anymore. he felt like he was standing on glass, the sharpness of the shards piercing his skin.

he looked down and he saw himself. he was standing in front of a lake, his reflection staring back at him with slightly widened eyes. tall, dark pine trees surrounding him wherever he looked. he took a step forward and felt the cold water wash away the pain of his wounds. the water turned dark from the blood.

and then he was drowning. gasping for air, his lungs filling with water instead, drawn to the bottom of the lake. his body fell limp and he looked up, eyes wide open. he saw himself again, but now the figure was watching him from the other side, standing on the shore. deep, red eyes staring straight into his soul.

somewhere in his mind he knew he could just swim back to the surface. if he just raised his arms, kicked with his feet, he would be back there, surrounded by the fresh scent of pine trees, breathing the cold night air again.

his body wouldn't listen. his gaze was locked in with the other version of himself. he felt his feet hit the bottom of the lake and then all he could see was red.

***

yoongi woke up to the sound of buzzing coming from somewhere in the direction of the night stand. it took a moment for him to realize that the annoying sound was his phone, but when he did, he just swiped at it blindly, not fully awake, but enough to realize it was still nighttime and he wasn't about to get up yet. the room fell silent for a moment, but then his phone started moving on the table again.

yoongi groaned, flopped around on his bed and lifted the thing up to his ear. ”what?” he snapped, annoyance evident in his tone.

"i'm so sorry to wake you up, but i didn't know what else to do," he heard jimin's voice, too loud and clear for his half-asleep state. yoongi tried to shake himself from the haze since he could detect an undertone of distress in the omega's voice.

"what's going on?" he aimed for a slightly softer tone.

jimin sighed. yoongi could hear from the noises in the background that he was still at work. he glanced at the time on his phone. a little after one am.

"look, i wouldn't have called you if i had a choice, i know you're not in the best terms at the moment, but i really can't—"

yoongi rolled his eyes and carded his fingers through his hair while sitting up on the edge of his bed. "get to the point, jimin."

"yeah, okay, so, jeongguk—"

yoongi's alpha stirred awake in his chest, but he tried his best to ignore it. yoongi didn't really know what had happened yesterday after he'd left, but his alpha had been restless ever since. "what now?" he grunted, trying to hide the concern in his voice.

"hyung, listen." there was shuffling on the other end and yoongi could detect the sound of the backroom door creaking. "he's been here for hours and now he's kinda wasted and i can't get anyone else to come get him, the place is packed, joonie-hyung had to come down here to help and tae is out at some club with his friends and i don't think he should leave alone in that kinda state, i'm not really sure he even can leave on his own at all with how drunk he is—"

"breathe, jimin." yoongi sighed. "why'd you let him drink so much, then?"

yoongi could vividly imagine the omega furrowing his brows at that. "i'm not his guardian, he's an adult and my job is not to get people to stop drinking."

"hm."

"look, hyung," jimin sighed, his tone a little smaller, little more tired and yoongi was already getting up to pull on some pants. "i'm worried about him. he's not himself. i think something's wrong, but he won't talk to me. ever since yesterday when tae and jin had patched him up, he hasn't spoken a word to anyone."

yoongi threw on his leather jacket and made sure he had his keys with him. "i'm coming. fifteen minutes, i'll be there."

"thank you, thank you, thank you." it sounded like jimin was jumping up and down. yoongi smiled to himself. "hyung, you're the best."

"you owe me," he quipped halfheartedly and started hopping down the stairs.

***

yoongi made his way to the farthest little corner table in the room after spotting the beta. he was slumped over in his seat, leaning his head on one hand and twirling a glass in the other. yoongi stopped beside the table and cleared his throat. jeongguk glanced up at him.

"don't wanna talk to you," the beta mumbled. yoongi was glad to notice jimin had managed to switch his beer to water. didn't seem to have had any effect yet.

"i know, i'm sorry, but i'm here to take you home."

jeongguk let out a humorless laugh, but made no move to get up.

yoongi shifted his weight from one leg to the other, impatient. he was tired, annoyed and there was this little sting behind his eyes that told him that he would have a massive headache tomorrow. "look, kid, i'm not really in the mood to argue right now. either you tell me where you live and i'll drop you off there, or you come with me. your choice."

jeongguk mouthed something inaudible, his eyes not meeting yoongi's.

"okay then, we're going to my place."

jimin waved at him from the counter with an apologetic smile. jeongguk wasn't really in a state to walk on his own, so yoongi had to practically lift him from the chair and they made their way to the door with yoongi holding most of the younger's body weight.

***

yoongi cursed under his breath while going through his closet, trying to find some clean clothes that would actually cover more than half of jeongguk's body. he marched back to the living room with his haul to see jeongguk spread out on the couch, forearm over his eyes. yoongi thought for a minute that he'd fallen asleep, but then the beta was raising his head, looking straight at him.

"why did you come?"

yoongi should've been expecting that. but honestly, he wasn't sure. when he'd heard jeongguk's name come out of jimin's mouth, he'd just jumped up, ready to go and he himself didn't know why. it was like his body had a mind of it's own and yoongi had no idea how it worked. he suspected his alpha had something to do with it. it had developed a weird connection with jeongguk, in spite the fact that they'd seen each other only a handful of times. yoongi snapped out of his thoughts when he realized jeongguk was still looking at him, expecting an answer to his question.

"i'm getting really tired of you questioning everything every time someone tries to help you." yoongi knew he was being unnecessarily mean, but he'd been woken up in the middle of the night and forced to drag himself up to rescue some kid who couldn't handle his liquor. he wasn't in the bestest of moods. his alpha may have been happy to jump at the mention of the beta, but yoongi valued his sleep.

"no, i mean—" jeongguk was searching for his words, huffing in frustration. yoongi waited, not-so-patiently. "why did jimin-hyung call you? you hate me."

"i don't hate you." yoongi shook his head and placed the sheets and a pile of clothes on the coffee table.

"hm." jeongguk turned his gaze down on his lap and fiddled with the sleeves of his shirt, biting his lower lip like he still wanted to say something, but didn't know how. the alcohol might have something to do with that. yoongi knew from experience that these kinds of talks generally went a lot better while sober.

"look, kid, we can talk about this tomorrow, i'd really like to get back to sleep now and i think your brain might be a little clearer in the morning too." yoongi motioned towards the bathroom. "you can go shower first, if you want, but don't you dare fall and hit your head, i'm going to sleep, not to the hospital."

"sleep," jeongguk mumbled, his arm flopping back over his eyes. yoongi threw his head back, closed his eyes and counted to ten.

"okay, i need you to work with me here. you have to change out of those clothes and i'll make a bed for you while you do that."

"mm." the kid didn't move a muscle. yoongi forced the heat from annoyance to dial down. he wasn't going to get anywhere if he got mad at the beta.

yoongi was beginning to think he deserved some kind of medal after tonight. this was impossible. yoongi sighed and practically dragged the younger down from the couch. jeongguk plopped down on his ass and snapped a bit more awake.

the beta glared at yoongi, a pout on his lips. he looked like a five-year old. "that hurt."

"change," yoongi grunted at him and started throwing the cushions on the floor. then he turned around to get the sheets from the coffee table and was met with a shirtless jeongguk standing only a feet away.

okay, now the heat that flashed through his body didn't have anything to do with his annoyance.

"shirt," he mumbled. great job, min yoongi, be a little more flustered and obvious.

"'m hot." jeongguk carded his fingers through his black locks and yoongi very much tried to keep his eyes away from the way the beta's muscles flexed with the motion.

yes you are but that's not the point here.

"okay, do what you want, i'm leaving a glass of water and some painkillers for you in the kitchen, don't wake me up in the morning," yoongi rumbled, maybe a little hasty, but thankfully jeongguk wasn't really in a state of sharp observance.

yoongi threw his bedroom door shut and plopped down on his bed, burying himself in the covers. now his face was as heated as his body. what the hell? his alpha was giving him a whiplash. a week ago he'd been growling at the beta, firmly believing that he was a threat to them all. then he'd spent a week with his alpha practically pining after the younger, constantly in a war with himself, trying to get to the same page with his inner wolf. after yesterday's incident at the reflection, yoongi had forcefully ripped himself away from there to give the shaken up beta some privacy. he'd known his help hadn't been needed there, but his alpha had disagreed. strongly.

and now he was what, lusting after the beta? yoongi was convinced there's was something wrong with him. there was absolutely no logical explanation for his alpha's behavior. this was not normal. he'd have to look into it. there had to be a reason. yoongi's body was getting tired of the constant fight, he'd have to find some kind of solution, this couldn't keep happening. especially now that jeongguk seemed to have become a solid part of their tight-knit group, and they would most likely be seeing each other regularly even more.

***

yoongi opened his eyes. he stared at the ceiling for a few minutes, trying to get his brain to co-operate and figure out what had woken him up this time. his phone was laid next to him on the bed, screen black. so that was not it.

he sat up on the bed and shook his head. his nostrils flared. why was his apartment smelling so strongly of lemon? it wasn't bitter or tangy, but a sweet, sugary lemon thick in the air. yoongi tilted his head and his brow furrowed in confusion.

his head was still a little hazy from sleep and he wandered into the kitchen, nose twitching, trying to figure out where the citrusy scent was coming from. he turned the coffee maker on and glanced at the living room, partly expecting for the couch to be empty, blankets folded neatly like it'd been last time. but no.

jeongguk was still asleep. his hair was fanning around his head on the pillow, few black curls falling on his forehead. he had his hands resting above his head, blanket kicked mostly on the floor. yoongi hummed. the younger seemed peaceful, content in his sleep. yoongi's alpha was humming with him.

jeongguk shifted in his sleep, about to wake up. yoongi's eyes widened when the fresh, sweet scent of lemons got even stronger in the air. jeongguk slowly opened his eyes, his gaze flitting over the room and locking on yoongi's.

they stared at each other for what felt like hours. then jeongguk's nose scrunched and his eyes flew wide open and filled with panic. the air turned from sweet and mellow to bitter in the matter of seconds. yoongi was frozen in place.

the scent was coming from jeongguk.

yoongi couldn't get his body to react. his alpha was screaming in his chest, trying to get him to move, but all yoongi could do was stare as the younger scrambled up, grabbed his clothes from the floor and ran to the door.

"jeongguk, wait—"

the door was slammed shut. yoongi felt actual physical pain from the way his alpha started howling after him.

***

shitshitshitfuckshitfuck

that was about all that was swirling in jeongguk's mind as he was flying down the stairs, three at a time. he struggled to get his hoodie and jacket on while running, but he couldn't stop. he'd spent so much time running, it was the first reaction his mind went to when he realized that he'd gotten caught.

jeongguk finally slowed down when he'd gotten a few blocks away from yoongi's. he squatted down, panting, holding his pounding head in his hands. he hadn't even realized the blinding headache he had, he'd been so focused on getting as far as possible as fast as he could. his thighs were trembling and he could feel the drops of sweat trickling down his spine.

yoongi knows. he knows and there's no going back now. why did he have to be so stupid and reckless?

okay, he needed a plan. but first, he needed to get to his car.

jeongguk took a few deep breaths and tried to stop mentally kicking himself. as he straightened up and glanced around, he was happy to realize that he knew exactly where he was. living on the streets had its benefits. he knew this part of the town like the back of his hands. luckily it was still so early that the streets were empty.

a few blocks ahead, he finally spotted a familiar vehicle. there it was, in all it's glory, almost rusted through in places, paint chips stripping off every time he closed the door. the most valuable thing he owned. also the only thing he could even begin to describe as a home. he'd been living from his car for about a year now. yeah, it's not easy to get a job when you have a record.

as he walked closer, he started to get the familiar bad feeling in his chest. something was wrong. and he quickly noticed what.

all of the windows were shattered, bashed in. some of his clothes were spread out on the seats, the glove compartment ripped from it's place, the middle console rummaged through and half of his stuff was gone. panic spread yet again through his body. he ripped the back door open, lowering one of the back seats. empty. everything he owned in the whole world, gone. a few articles of clothing left behind.

he slumped on the seat and screwed his eyes shut. okay, this had to be a bad dream. a nightmare. in reality he was still happily inside yoongi's apartment, still dreaming, safe and sound in his living room. if he could only figure out a way to wake up.

a few minutes later he was starting to accept the fact that this really wasn't a dream. it's not like his reality had been the rosiest of them all anyway. jeongguk opened his eyes and tried to get his head together. this was not the end of the world. it might seem like that now, but he'd fought his way out of bad situations before. he could get through this, too.

his eyes widened when he remembered why he'd been fleeing in the first place. he jumped out of the car and circled back to open the trunk. he lifted the carpet up and opened the little compartment. there, under the spare tire, safe and sound, was the first answer to his multi-dimensional problem.

he ripped off the little pouch that was neatly taped on the bottom of the compartment and opened it. he picked two of the little white tablets and swallowed. he tasted the bitterness of the scent blockers on his tongue, but he didn't have any time to go look for water. he pocketed the little pouch and placed the carpet back.

"i should've known," he heard a familiar voice come from behind him. jeongguk sighed, defeated. there was no point, really. he had no way out. no plan. might as well just give up.

he turned around. yoongi was standing there, arms crossed, furious expression on his face. the blockers hadn't really kicked in yet, so jeongguk could taste yoongi's anger in the air. what confused him, was the distressed undertone. it had been so long since he'd last been without the blockers, so he couldn't be sure, since he was a little out of practice in detecting peoples emotions from their scents. one of the nice little side effects; others couldn't smell him, but his senses were blinded, too.

"hi," he whispered, his voice tiny, almost inaudible.

yoongi glared at him, brow furrowed, his sweat-damp hair sticking on his forehead. he'd been running, jeongguk realized. "you live in a car?"

jeongguk glanced around, flinching a little when he noticed he was standing in a pile of shattered glass from the broken widows. "well, at least i did," he mumbled, cursing inwardly at how lost he sounded. he hated showing his weaknesses in front of others. yes, he didn't have a proper home, didn't really have his life together, yeah, he knew he was seriously messed up, but he'd become so good at pretending, he felt extremely uncomfortable to be confronted like this.

yoongi eyed him, expression softening just a little. "i knew you were keeping secrets, but after we found out about the jail thing, you could've told us."

"juvie," jeongguk corrected.

yoongi scoffed, eyeing the remnants of the thing jeongguk had called home for the past year. "not the point."

jeongguk was starting to feel defensive. he crossed his arms to his chest, trying to shield himself. he forced his voice to be a little stronger. "yeah, okay, i lied. what difference does it make, where i live?" jeongguk was now looking at the older straight in the eye. his instincts were telling him to drop his gaze and not argue back. jeongguk had never been really good at following the voice that resonated inside his head.

yoongi sighed. "i really, really wanna help you, but you're making it impossible."

jeongguk tilted his head in confusion. "you— what?"

the alpha rolled his eyes. "yeah, i can't really explain it either. but i'm tired of fighting against my instincts, so if you could meet me halfway here, it would be greatly appreciated."

they stood in silence for a while, jeongguk's eyes on the ground. his thoughts were running faster than he could keep up with and that didn't help his headache that was getting worse by the minute.

"okay," yoongi huffed, breaking the silence. "you've got some serious explaining to do. and i need coffee. why don't i help you gather your stuff, or what's left of it and then we go back to my place?"

jeongguk's instincts were still begging for him to runrunrun, to get away, to find a safe little corner and hide away. but the rational part of him wanted to listen to yoongi. there was something in this alpha. he was different.

jeongguk hadn't felt safe in a long while. and maybe it didn't make any sense, but he felt safe with yoongi. even when the alpha had been practically growling at him last week, jeongguk hadn't been really afraid of him. he'd been ashamed. scared of their reactions, scared of being cast out. again.

"okay," he whispered and yoongi offered him a little smile. it was tense and didn't reach the older's eyes, but it was a smile, nonetheless.

jeongguk was starting to feel a little better about the fact that this hadn't been a nightmare after all.

Chapter Text

Chapter Text

yoongi had been lying awake for an hour. he was just staring at the ceiling, feeling a little numb, little confused and a lot sad. they'd walked back to the apartment, yoongi had let them in and jeongguk had disappeared to the living room before yoongi even got a 'good night' out of his mouth.

he flopped around on the bed and cursed at himself. he shouldn't have let his instincts take over. he wasn't regretting that he'd kissed jeongguk, but everything that had happened after, he regretted deeply. what kind of an idiot tries to scent a person that is on blockers? that was dumb enough on it's own, but considering the fact yoongi still had no idea why exactly jeongguk took them and why he had such a weird relationship with his inner wolf, yoongi might've just been the dumbest person that ever lived.

he stared at the blackness of his room for another hour. he heard the seconds tick by from the clock on his nightstand. then he decided he'd had enough. he wouldn't get any sleep like this. and there was no way jeongguk was sleeping either.

yoongi got up and padded to the living room doorway. he'd been right. jeongguk was sitting on the couch, his knees up and arms wrapped around his legs. he raised his head when he heard yoongi's steps. yoongi noticed immediately that the younger had been crying and he felt a little growl in his chest. this time it wasn't aimed towards jeongguk, but at himself. he'd been the one to make the younger cry and he and his alpha both were kinda freaking out.

"jeongguk, i—"

"i don't want to talk about it," the boy wiped at his tear-stained face furiously.

"but i do." yoongi sighed, walked a little further into the room and sat down at the carpet, leaving a good few feet between them. "i don't know how to make this right, but we're getting nowhere if we don't talk about it."

"just forget it," jeongguk mumbled, staring stubbornly in front of him, not facing yoongi.

"we can do that, but i think that's not what neither of us want." yoongi picked on the loose strand on the carpet.

"please, as if we don't both know that the only reason for you to kiss me is because your alpha wanted to. and just because you know that i'm an omega." jeongguk spat out the last word like it had burned his tongue.

yoongi just stared, speechless, he couldn't quite believe his ears right now. was the younger really that blind and oblivious?

"why are you so obsessed with your status? that's not all you are, that's not all i am, it doesn't define you. whether you're an alpha, omega, beta, it doesn't matter." yoongi's attempt to calm the younger down backfired, badly. he had no idea what ticked him off, but right after yoongi had stopped speaking, jeongguk was jumping up from the couch, marching towards the front door, his eyes blazing with anger. yoongi didn't have time to think, he just leaped after him, grabbing at his wrist. jeongguk stopped, shook him off and turned to face him again.

"it doesn't matter?" jeongguk's voice was full of venom and yoongi found himself flinching. "just because you're living happily ever after with your alpha, doesn't mean everyone is!"

"who says i'm 'living happily ever after with my alpha'?" now yoongi was getting annoyed himself. he knew that jeongguk was upset and wasn't really thinking before the words came out, but he couldn't help the anger that flashed through his body. "you're not the only person in the world that has had problems with themselves. the whole world doesn't revolve around you, you know?"

"i'm not saying it does." jeongguk was practically growling by then. tears started falling from his eyes again, but the younger made no move to wipe them away this time. "you have no idea what you're talking about."

"then why don't you enlighten me."

"i need to get out of here." and then jeongguk turned on his heels and walked straight out of the door. yoongi didn't try to stop him. maybe it was a good idea to let the younger be for now. it's not like their conversation had been going anywhere good anyway.

***

jeongguk knew full well he was being stupid. stupid and immature and every single synonym for those words that existed. still, he couldn't exactly help it. he knew that he'd never been really good at expressing his feelings and it hadn't helped that there had never been anyone that cared enough to help him.

there was this little, long since suppressed voice in his head whisper yelling that now there was someone who cared. but he just ignored it, hopped down the stairs, picked a random direction and started walking.

jeongguk felt like he was back in square one. he'd thought for a while that maybe this time he would be accepted as he was. maybe this time he'd found a place for himself, a place where he could finally start building his life, instead of just trying to survive from one day to the other.

and then he'd been so stupid and went and kissed yoongi. what in the world had he been thinking?

oh right, the same thing he'd been thinking for a while.

it'd been a long time since jeongguk had last felt like that. felt like kissing someone for himself, not to please the other person. not out of obligation, but out of want. jeongguk wasn't really sure if he'd ever felt like that. like he was allowed to feel, allowed to want something for himself.

he continued walking, hands inside his jacket pockets, head down. he wasn't exactly running from yoongi this time, more like he was running from himself. from his own feelings. he was smart enough to recognize that he was afraid. that was a familiar feeling, but now he was more scared of himself than anyone else. he was afraid that he wouldn't be able to shake off all the things from his past and he would get hurt because of that. because of what he was.

he sat down on the curb and leaned his head into his hands. he hadn't realized he was still crying, but now he could feel the hot tears pooling onto his palms.

why was he so messed up? he should be fine now, he had gotten away. why was he still feeling like this? would this ever go away? would there be a day somewhere in the future when he would feel normal? or was it always going to be like this?

"you really are a pathetic little bitch aren't you? the only thing you have of value is your last name. and even that isn't really yours, isn't that right, omega?"

jeongguk sniffled and tried to get his ex-boyfriend's voice out of his head. he hadn't thought about that night in a long time, but something had brought the bad memories out just now. he knew that these new people in his life, that yoongi wasn't the same, wasn't like his ex or his family, but he couldn't help himself. those thoughts were rooted so deeply in his brain, it was hard not to go there, especially in situations like these, when he was doubting himself and everything around him. he wiped his face on the sleeve of his jacket and digged out his phone from his pocket.

jeongguk didn't really have anyone to call to. but he knew he didn't want to go back, not now. not like this. so he tapped the first name on his short list of contacts that he was pretty sure would answer.

and they did, after three rings. "hello? jeongguk?"

"hi hyung," jeongguk's voice was broken and so, so small. he cleared his throat. "i'm sorry, i know it's late, but i didn't really have anyone else to call to and i—"

"oh my god, darling, breathe," jimin's voice was unbelievably soft and jeongguk felt like crying a little more. "where are you? did something happen? do you need me to come get you? where's yoongi-hyung?"

the questions were flying out and jeongguk started to feel like he should be the one telling the other to breathe. "i'm— not really sure where i am?"

"send me your location." jeongguk heard something from the background that sounded suspiciously like a car door being opened. "i'm coming to get you."

"i— i don't—"

"it's okay, honey. you don't have to say anything. i'll be there soon, okay?" jimin's voice was calmer, now, and jeongguk started to feel a little less hysteric himself. "don't move."

"i won't." they finished the call and jeongguk was left staring at his phone, speechless. he couldn't quite believe what had just happened. jimin had just woken up in the middle of the night and left to get jeongguk from who knows how far from his house and all without no explanation. why?

jeongguk sat there, trying to shut down his thoughts. he wasn't sure how much time had passed, but then he saw bright headlight turning the corner a few blocks away and soon jimin was pulling over in front of him. jeongguk got up, still a little stunned and watched as jimin leaned to to open the passenger door for him.

"get in, it's freezing out there."

jeongguk sat in the car and realized only then that his fingers were kind of numb. he hadn't even noticed how cold it was. 

***

"no, hyung, he's fine. he's here now, you don't have to worry."

jeongguk knew he wasn't supposed to be listening, but it was hard not to hear when jimin was standing just on the other side of the room. he'd known that their apartment had to be a little bigger since there was three people living there, but this was not quite what he'd expected. he'd never actually been to the place, despite the fact that he'd grown close to the two omegas of the group. jeongguk was sitting at the kitchen table, holding a steaming cup of tea between his frozen fingers and trying to suppress the pang of quilt he felt in his heart when he'd heard yoongi's muffled, but still clearly worried tone when jimin had answered the phone.

"yeah, he's gonna stay the night."

"no, he didn't say." jeongguk saw jimin glancing at him from the corner of his eyes.

"it's okay."

"i'll see you tomorrow."

"goodnight, hyung. try to get some sleep."

jimin finished the call and flashed jeongguk a little smile. then he walked back and sat beside him at the table. jeongguk stared down at the cup, scared of lifting his gaze up.

"it's okay if you don't want to tell me what happened," jimin said, his voice only a little louder than a whisper. jeongguk had the feeling he was doing that on purpose, to not scare him. he couldn't really blame his friend for that. jeongguk did have a tendency to run. but now he was just numb. and tired.

"i'm— not really sure."

"did you two get in a fight?"

"he kissed me." jeongguk blurted out and closed his eyes, waiting for jimin's reaction.

"what?" jimin's tone wasn't what he'd been waiting for. it was louder and a little… angry? "he did what? and he just let you run out after that, alone?"

"oh no, no no no, it's not what you think," jeongguk was quick to open his eyes again and turn fully to his friend. "he kissed me at the bar. after you guys left. and i kissed him back." and then he realized there was quite a big plot point to the story, one that jimin wouldn't get if he didn't know the truth.

"okay," jimin eyed him, a little suspicious still, but softer. "so, why did you ran out like that?"

jeongguk sighed. he might as well. it would come out eventually anyway. "so, there's something i need to tell you. something i've been lying about."

jimin was waiting, now completely void of anger.

jeongguk took a deep breath and tried to reason with himself. jimin was safe. jimin had never been anything but kind, supportive and he'd literally just ran out in the middle of the night just to help him. he could do this. "i'm… not a beta?"

the other tilted his head in confusion. "but your— what?"

"i'm taking blockers. have for a while now."

"so you're an omega, then?"

"how'd you know?"

"there's really only fifty-fifty chance, just took a guess." jimin was tapping his fingers against the wooden table. "so, i'm assuming this has something to do with tonight?"

now it was jeongguk's turn to be confused. "you're not mad? that i lied?"

"i'm sure you have your reasons." jimin let out a little smile and jeongguk felt his mind calming a little. "your status, your business, really. why'd you think i would be mad at you?"

"i don't? know?"

"so, anyway, back to the matter at hand."

"yeah, so." jeongguk cleared his throat. he flushed a little at the memory. "he tried to scent me. and i guess i freaked a little."

"wait, so yoongi-hyung knew already?"

"yeah."

"okay." jimin carded his fingers through his silvery blond locks. "i still don't quite see what the problem is here."

"i'm—" jeongguk searched for his words. "what if he only did that because i'm an—"

"don't even finish that." jimin's tone was a little more sharp now. "i don't know who has made you feel like that before, 'cause i sure as hell don't believe that thought came to your head just now, but hyung isn't like that."

"i know," jeongguk said silently. jimin didn't seem very convinced, so he continued. "i do. i know i haven't known any of you guys for long, but long enough to know you don't think like that. but i do. i can't help that it's the first thing that pops into my head."

jimin's gaze was a bit more sympathetic now. "look. i think this is something you're gonna have to talk to him about. not tonight, no, but soon. preferably before you two are so tangled up in this mess you don't know how to get out of it."

jeongguk nodded and sipped his tea. it had gotten cold by now, but it still tasted good.

"now, we're going to go to sleep. you can take my bed, i'll go sleep in tae's room. he won't be home till noon, anyway."

jeongguk remembered just then that there was more than one person living in this apartment. "is hobi-hyung—"

"they're both out," jimin was quick to assure him. "we were at this club, but i left early, i have to go to work tomorrow. i teach a dance class at this academy, i doubt the children's parents would be pleased if i'd show up there hungover."

"yeah," jeongguk mirrored jimin's smile. "thank you. for coming to get me. and for, i don't know, not freaking out?"

"never." jimin ruffled his hair with an affectionate smile. "go to sleep. i'll drop you back home tomorrow when i leave for work."

"okay." jeongguk yawned.

it was only after he'd already gotten into jimin's bedroom, changed his clothes to the pair of sweatpants jimin had digged up for him from hoseok's closet, that he realized he hadn't even questioned it when jimin had called yoongi's place his home.

huh. maybe there was still hope for him. he'd just have to clear things up with yoongi. jeongguk wasn't sure how he'd be able to do that, but at least now he was ready to try.

maybe now was finally the time to stop running.

***

he felt something soft on his face. soft and freezing cold. he looked up and saw that the whole sky had tuned white. it was snowing. he looked down and saw a trail of footprints in front of him, leading towards the forest. the trail disappeared under the darkness of the pine trees.

he wasn't sure if he'd always been following this path. but now it was all he could think of. it felt like some unknown force was pulling him forward, into the forest, into the dark. and he was happy to follow it.

his cheeks and nose were starting to feel numb. he had no idea how long he'd been walking, but he wasn't getting tired. at first, all he could see was just more trees, more darkness, no path other than the footprints on the ground. and then he saw a flash of white behind the shadows of the forest. he couldn't stop now. he knew he had to get there.

he stepped in the clearing that was surrounded by the tallest pine trees he'd ever seen. the area wasn't very big, but big enough to fit a tiny lake in the middle. the water was completely frozen, a thin layer of snow on top of the ice. he continued walking. the footprints lead him to the center of the frozen lake and then there was nothing. the trail stopped, like the one that had left them had vanished into thin air.

he kneeled down and swiped at the snow resting on the ice. he saw his reflection like he would from a mirror, but a little distorted, a little less clear. the only difference were the eyes. his reflection had clear blue eyes that were staring deep into his soul.

then the ice shattered under him and he was falling.

***

yoongi had been up for a few hours when his phone rang. he'd been trying to replace the lack of sleep he'd gotten with drinking a full pot of coffee for breakfast. hadn't really helped that much. he glanced at the flashing screen and furrowed his brow in confusion.

"hello? jimin?"

the voice that came was definitely not jimin's. "no, it's me."

yoongi wasn't sure if he should be shocked, happy or relieved. "jeongguk? are you alright?"

the other end was silent for a while. "i'm sorry."

yoongi smiled a little and plopped down on the couch with a deep sigh. his legs weren't feeling very stable right now. "i'm sorry too."

"no, i'm really sorry. for yelling at you and for running out, it was really immature and you didn't deserve it and—"

"gguk?" yoongi was smiling even more, softer and softer by the minute.

"yeah?" the younger sounded a little out of breath.

"come home? we'll talk then?"

"yeah," jeongguk said, a little stronger now. "jimin's going to drop me there in an hour, i just wanted to call first in case you—"

"i'm sorry for interrupting you again, but if you're going to question whether i want you here or not, let me just stop you right there." yoongi wanted to make this clear for the younger. "you're always welcome here. always. i don't care what kind of a fight we've had, you can always come back home."

"home," the younger repeated, sounding a little stunned. yoongi chuckled silently, not wanting the other to feel embarrassed. "okay. i'll— i'll see you in a bit?"

"see you."

yoongi let the device slip from his fingers to the couch and he leaned back, burrowing himself in the softness of the cushions. he'd been so restless the whole night, his alpha pacing back and forth, trying to reason with himself to not run out to fetch the younger back by force. he hadn't been sure if jeongguk would come back on his own. his rational part had told him that the younger just needed some time, some space to himself.

yoongi was glad that he'd been able to control his instincts this time.

Chapter Text

Chapter Text

"you're all set then." jeongguk summoned his best customer service smile. "see you in a few weeks."

he sighed from relief and slumped against the front desk the minute the customer was out of the door. taehyung eyed him from his side of the room, too happy, too bright.

"what's so funny?" jeongguk mumbled against the table.

"you're so oblivious," tae snickered. he rolled closer on his chair, placed his forearms on the desk and plopped his head on top of them. "you have absolutely no idea when someone is flirting with you."

"she was not flirting," jeongguk groaned and rolled his eyes. his head was starting to hurt. the woman was nice and all, but she talked a mile a minute and jeongguk found the constant blabbering to be very annoying. and headache-inducing. "she just likes to talk."

"yeah, alright, since you're the expert here." tae winked at him and jeongguk's eyes would soon become permanently turned to the back of his head from the force he rolled them with.

"so," he was desperately trying to change the subject. "you have a free hour now? want to take a look at the design?"

tae had been on his ass for weeks now, pleading and pleading for him to do something, anything on his skin. jeongguk had no idea why tae wouldn't go to someone more experienced, namjoon, maybe, or one of his other artist-friends? but no, tae had been persistent. and jeongguk wasn't known for his resistance against his puppy eyes.

"these are amazing!" tae had spread the sheets of paper all over the table in three seconds when jeongguk handed them over.

"i still have no idea why you want me to do such a big piece for my first one on you, but i guess it turned out pretty good," jeongguk mumbled and chewed the inside of his cheek. taehyung eyed him, brow furrowed.

"my dear friend, you're better than you believe," the older huffed and pointed at one of the sketches. "this is perfect. just what i wanted."

it was an abstract drawing of a bird, half of it sketched and half done with watercolors. jeongguk was quite proud of it, he could admit that much, but he was still hesitating. he was a perfectionist, very attentive to detail with all his clients, but it was a whole lot bigger of a deal to be tattooing his friend.

"so, when do we start?" he asked, collecting the scattered pieces of paper in his hands.

"i have a free day next week, thursday, do you have time then? i know you're pretty much booked, but we can work in little sections, whenever you have time."

"i'll make time," jeongguk smiled at his gleaming friend. he clicked the calendar open on the computer and rolled to next week. "my last client leaves at eight, we can do it then?"

"its a date." tae did a little spin on his chair and jeongguk eyed his friend with amusement. he was the youngest of the group, but sometimes he thought taehyung would fit the role better, with his free spirited nature. jeongguk envied his social skills, tae was just simply good with everyone. he could make anyone feel comfortable, even the most reserved clients. and jeongguk, too.

they both still had a few clients booked for the day and by nine, jeongguk was sure his hand was about to fall off. he didn't usually work days this long, but he'd overbooked by accident and now his poor fingers were paying for it. jeongguk cleaned up his space after the last client had left and fetched his backpack from the break room. tae clicked all the lights off and they headed out together.

"so, i've been meaning to ask you," tae started after a few minutes. jeongguk tilted his head in question. "i had this client last week who invited me to a party this saturday. he's opening a new club, i think? jimin and hobi are coming, i thought i'd ask if you wanted to tag along?"

jeongguk was a little surprised. "me?"

"yeah," tae went on, not noticing the wonderment in jeongguk's tone. "i'm gonna get jimin to guilt trip yoongi-hyung to come too. joonie and jin are working, but i don't think it would've been really their scene anyway."

jeongguk thought about it for a minute. clubs and parties weren't really his thing either, but maybe it wouldn't be so bad with his new friends there. and yoongi.

"okay," he huffed and taehyung flashed him the brightest smile yet.

"great! you going home now?"

"no, actually, i thought i'd stop by the bar, yoongi-hyung gets off in like thirty minutes."

tae was practically beaming. "i'll come with you. jimin owes me a drink anyway."

they walked in the epiphany ten minutes later. there were no customers, wednesday night's weren't really crowded, so jeongguk wasn't that surprised to find yoongi and jimin just sitting at the counter, already pretty much ready to go by the looks of it. though yoongi was still in his work clothes and jeongguk couldn't help but let his eyes linger a little. how could a simple black t-shirt look so good on someone?

jimin was the first to notice them and he smiled, waving a hand. yoongi turned around, but his smile died on his lips, his eyes stopped to jeongguk and sharpened a little. jeongguk found himself squirming under the intense gaze of the older.

"what?" he asked, glancing down and tapped the leg of yoongi's stool with his shoe. taehyung hopped to sit on the counter and fished a beer for himself from the other side, ignoring the slap he received from jimin at that.

yoongi just continued staring. "what are you wearing?"

jeongguk raised his head, eyes wide in confusion. "a hoodie?"

"it has fur."

jeongguk eyed himself. he had a black faux-fur hoodie on, it was getting cold and his leather jacket wasn't really warm enough anymore. "well, yeah?"

"it's fluffy."

"it is." jeongguk tilted his head. yoongi's tone was flat and he hadn't stopped staring. jeongguk was at a loss for words. he had no idea what was happening and why yoongi was suddenly so interested in his choice of clothing.

"why?"

"i like it. it's soft." jeongguk threw on the large hood and swiped at a few curls that fell on his forehead.

"oh my god," yoongi groaned, gave a little glare at jimin who was chuckling beside them and then stood up from the stool. jeongguk heard him muttering something inaudible under his breath when he disappeared to the back.

jeongguk turned his wide eyes to jimin and tae, only finding them to be on the verge of bursting into laughter. "what did i do?"

taehyung was howling and jimin almost fell from his chair. jeongguk furrowed his brow, extremely confused and pulled the sleeves of his oversized hoodie over his fingers.

"i rest my case," taehyung got out between the bursts of giggles. "oblivious."

yoongi walked back out and brushed past jeongguk, motioning for him to follow. jeongguk gave one last puzzled look to the other two and then walked to the door, where yoongi was waiting, holding it open for him.

"hyung, are you alright?"

"let's just go home." yoongi gave him a small smile and jeongguk's mind was somewhat eased.

***

"so, how's it going?" jimin's question came out sing-songed. he had the damned glimmer in his eyes and yoongi was prepared to slip into the first hole he'd lay his eyes on.

they were, surprisingly, shopping. jimin had insisted he needed some new clothes for the apparently very fancy club opening they'd been invited to and had managed to blackmail yoongi into coming with him. yoongi wasn't super thrilled, he didn't really like malls or crowded places of any kind, but he was prepared to make the sacrifice. he couldn't really be sure if jimin had been kidding or not when he'd threatened to tell jeongguk about the whole 'hoodie-incident'. jimin had a tendency to exaggerate and yoongi didn't want to think of all the ways jimin could phrase the fact that yoongi's scent had spiked just a little, tiny bit when jeongguk had walked in as a black ball of fluff.

"how's what going?"

"oh, don't be like that," jimin huffed. "i know you guys already kissed, though i admit it wasn't really the ideal first kiss, but still. and now that all things are pretty much cleared up and you're not afraid he'll murder us in our sleep, how are things going?"

there's the exaggerating. yoongi trailed after jimin while the omega was jumping from stand to stand, apparently on the hunt for the perfect pair of shoes that yoongi was starting to suspect didn't exist. "it's… complicated?"

"be a little more vague," jimin tutted at him, unimpressed and frowned. "have you talked about it? has there been any more kissing or other such actions?"

"well, no." yoongi crossed his arms to his chest an shifted his weight from one leg to the other, uncomfortable. "i'm not about to jump him right after he told me how badly he got treated in his last relationship, what do you take me for?"

"you know i don't mean it like that." jimin gave him a little smile. "i just think that our ggukie is really shy. and yes, i realize you want for him to set the pace or whatever, but you could at least give him something to work with. show some interest. he freaked because he thought your alpha was only interested in his omega. show him that yoongi is interested in jeongguk."

okay, that made more sense than yoongi had been expecting. "for such a pain in the ass, you're actually kinda smart," he muttered.

"i know i am, you guys should listen to me more often." jimin was gleaming at him. "ggukie does."

"you're his hyung, of course he does." but yoongi's complaint went unheard, since jimin was already squealing and running towards another store.

"this is it, hyung, here i will meet my one true love!"

"such a strange relationship you have with shoes." yoongi followed his enthusiastically bouncing friend to the store, smiling to himself.

***

"put this on."

"hyung, i've tried on like four different pairs of jeans, i don't own any more."

"well, then, we're gonna have to change your shirt."

"is this really necessary?"

"yes, it absolutely is. now, quit complaining and do as i say."

yoongi chuckled into his glass. thank god taehyung and jimin had a new life-sized doll to dress up, he had been the victim of that game for too many times. the three youngest were camped in jimin's room, while yoongi and hoseok had managed to escape to the kitchen. jeongguk had been snatched from the door when he'd barely got a foot into the apartment.

"i'm kinda surprised you agreed to go." hoseok poured himself some more wine and motioned towards yoongi's glass, which he happily pushed forward.

"well, i've said no like ten times in a row, i guess it doesn't hurt to have some fun once in a while," yoongi mumbled, avoiding his friend's knowing gaze. yoongi knew his explanations were useless, everyone here knew that he'd agreed only because of jeongguk. except maybe jeongguk himself.

"well," hoseok glanced at his phone to check the time. "we have to leave in twenty minutes if we wanna be there before midnight, they better be ready soon."

as if summoned by that, taehyung jumped into the room, eyes gleaming. "done!" he chirped, and waltzed in to take a sip out of yoongi's glass. "let's get going."

yoongi had to blink twice when the other two emerged from the bedroom. jimin was of course all dressed up, like always, the omega was really particular about his appearance. but yoongi had only seen jeongguk wearing his hoodies and leather jackets, never in a fancier outfit. he looked illegally good in his every day attire, yes, but this was something else. his jeans were so tight yoongi was a little worried about his circulation and the flowy black dress shirt was giving problems to yoongi's. at least he felt like his heart stopped beating for a second.

jeongguk stood in the doorway, looking a little unsure and his cheeks were tinted adorably pink. okay, yes, yoongi had been an idiot when he'd agreed to go to the stupid party. it would be a miracle if he survived this evening in one piece.

jimin cleared his throat and flashed a teasing smile at yoongi's direction while ushering them all to the hall.

"i called an uber, it should be here any minute now, let's get going!"

jeongguk waited for him while the others were already running to the elevator. "i'm not so sure this is a good idea," he mumbled, so silent only yoongi could hear him, wringing his hands together.

yoongi eyed the younger, a little worried. "why? i don't really care for these kinda things myself, but tae said his friend got us a private table and all, it might not be so bad."

"i just," jeongguk bit his lower lip and his eyes flitted over yoongi, a little nervous. "i've never been at a club. bars, yeah, but nowhere you'd have to dress up like this."

"you know you can change if the clothes are bothering you," yoongi offered. "though i think you look really good," he added when he couldn't stop himself.

jeongguk's eyes brightened a little. "yeah? well, they're not so bad, i think."

"they're not bad at all." yoongi smiled. he finally got his jacket on and they walked to the elevator. apparently his mouth was not the only one acting without his permission, 'cause when the elevator dinged and the doors slid open, he placed his palm on jeongguk's lower back. yoongi was mentally slapping himself when they got in and he let his hand fall back to his side. the last thing he wanted to do was to cross any boundaries and he really didn't want to appear too forward or pushy. to his relief, jeongguk was only smiling at him, doe-eyes wide and the pretty pink still staining his cheeks.

the club was located at the top floor of one of the tallest buildings in the city. it was the kind of place yoongi would've normally never found himself in, but now, here he was, standing in the open area filled with flashing lights, glamorous people and his nose was hit with dozens of different scents. yeah. that's one more thing he didn't like about clubs like these. all the pheromones in the air were clogging his senses.

it got better when taehyung led them further into the back, towards the vip -area. they were guided to a table that had a sign with tae's name on it and they all took a seat, one of the bartenders already waiting by for their orders. yoongi didn't feel like drinking that much, so he ordered only a beer, while the others were dead set on taking full advantage of their tab that would be paid by the owner, the one that had invited them in the first place, and ordered bucketful's of champagne.

yoongi glanced at his right and was happy to notice that jeongguk didn't seem to be so uncomfortable anymore. he was laughing, chatting with jimin, eyes sparkling in the flash of the colorful lights. yoongi's alpha was a bit restless due to the cloud of scents in the air, but as long as he would stay away from the dance floor where the air was thickest, he should be fine. his alpha wasn't one to thrive in situations like these. he was more of a lone wolf, really, no pun intended.

the night went by fast. jimin and tae disappeared to the dance floor, came back to chug more champagne into their bodies and then disappeared again. they tried to get jeongguk to go with them, but the younger declined every time. he seemed to be perfectly happy where he was, chatting lowly with yoongi and hoseok, coaxing them in stories about their college life and the earlier stages of their group, before it had fully formed into the thing it had now become.

"wait," the youngest was now laughing with actual tears in his eyes, struggling to get the words out. "joonie-hyung was an underground rapper in college?"

"yeah," yoongi hummed and smiled, trying to keep himself from bursting into giggles. yoongi didn't do giggles. or maybe he did? guess he had drunk a bit more than he'd intended at first. "oh, i gotta show you some of the videos i have, the lyrics, let me tell you, those were the days."

jeongguk's nose scrunched up when he was laughing and yoongi's heart did a backflip every time. he was truly too cute for his own good. yoongi had spotted a few alphas eyeing the younger and he'd set them with a glare every time, hoping jeongguk wouldn't notice. yoongi was beginning to have a hard time containing himself. he'd had to remind his alpha and himself multiple times that jeongguk wasn't theirs to claim, as much as he might hope so. they hadn't still talked about what had happened and it was entirely possible they never would. yoongi had said that he wouldn't force jeongguk into anything and he fully intended to stick to his word.

there was this little voice inside his head that sounded suspiciously like jimin, that told him that maybe he could do something. yoongi had thought a lot about what his friend had said, but he wasn't entirely sure where to draw the line. how could he show interest without making jeongguk uncomfortable?

yoongi was snapped out of his thoughts when suddenly a hand was placed on his shoulder. he turned his upper body to gaze at the person, who turned out to be one of the people he really didn't want to have to see tonight. or ever. yoongi tried his best not to show it.

"hey, it's been a long time!" the omega standing next to him chirped happily, not noticing the flash of not-so-positive recognition on yoongi's face. "what are you doing here? i remember you hating places like these?"

it was his ex. or maybe that would be even too strong of a word to describe it. they'd gone out a couple times almost a year ago, slept together maybe once or twice, yoongi couldn't quite recall. that's how memorable this guy had been. yoongi wasn't even sure about his name. daeho? daehyun?

"hi," yoongi tried to smile at least politely. "my friend got an invitation. thought i could at least give it a try."

yoongi tried to be as vague as possible, as uninterested as he could while still remaining polite. he angled his body away from the guy and tried to signal to hoseok with his eyes to do something. but hoseok didn't seem to get it and yoongi figured he could probably blame the champagne for that. jeongguk had fallen silent on the other side of the table, clearly uncomfortable with the sudden appearance of the stranger. that was one more reason for yoongi to get rid of this guy as fast as possible.

"well, it has been nice bumping into you—"

"would you like to dance?" the omega interrupted him and his hand travelled down yoongi's shoulder. okay, he was seriously starting to get annoyed. couldn't he take a hint?

"i'm really—" yoongi was cut short when jeongguk stood up abruptly, almost knocking over the glasses on the table. his eyes were a little wide, his stance a little stiff and yoongi really didn't like that look. not at all. "jeongguk, where are you—"

"i'll go find jimin and tae," the younger mumbled while turning around and stomping off. not towards the direction of the dance floor. yoongi furrowed his brow and only remembered the omega standing beside him when he felt his hand curl around his forearm.

"so, about that dance?" the guy was looking at him, hopeful, eyes a little hazy.

"i'm sorry, i don't really dance." yoongi brushed him off, maybe with a little too much force, but he was growing extremely uncomfortable under the unwanted contact. he stood up, raised his eyebrows at hoseok, who nodded and swatted his hand at him.

"go, see if he's okay."

***

jeongguk drew his lungs full of the fresh night air. he hadn't even realized how stuffy it had become inside. he leaned his forearms on the glass railing surrounding the narrow outside area that was surrounding the club. he looked down at the city spread under him. he saw flashes of color everywhere, lights from the windows and cars driving down on the roads. they were up so high he couldn't hear the traffic. jeongguk had always liked living in the city. never had he seen it from this angle, though. it looked beautiful.

"i doubt you'll find jimin and tae here."

jeongguk snapped his head around and watched as yoongi walked to lean on the railing beside him. he blinked in surprise, but kept his face otherwise blank. jeongguk had never been really good at hiding his emotions, so he was glad yoongi kept his eyes on the city before them and wasn't looking at jeongguk.

"why'd you come out here?"

"to check up on you? what did you think?" yoongi huffed and straightened his back, now shifting his gaze to jeongguk, brow furrowed a little.

"your friend's gonna miss you," he mumbled. jeongguk knew he was being stupid and jealous when he had no right to be, but he couldn't help the way his stomach had dropped when the strange omega had placed his hand on yoongi's shoulder so easily, so naturally, touching him like he'd done it thousand times before. maybe he had. jeongguk had heard enough of their conversation over the loud music that he could tell they knew each other.

"okay, seriously, what's going on?" yoongi crossed his arms, brow furrowing even more. "are you okay?"

jeongguk straightened himself too, facing the older. he got a little distracted by the way yoongi's hair fell on his face, a little disheveled from the alpha's habit of carding his fingers through it. his eyes flitted lower for a second, taking in the light leather jacket and the peek of collarbones that were visible thanks to the v-neck shirt he was wearing underneath.

yes, jeongguk had been looking at the older the whole evening. but after the four glasses of champagne he'd downed, everything looked a little different. and here, outside, the sparkle of the city lights surrounding them, everything looked so good. yoongi looked so good.

and then jeongguk's body was moving on autopilot. he grabbed a hold of yoongi's jacket and crashed their lips together, ignoring the gasp of surprise that came from the alpha. jeongguk swallowed it down, moved his lips to fit in perfectly with yoongi's and drowned in it. drowned in yoongi.

a loud bang echoed in his ears. jeongguk ripped himself away and whirled around, only to see the door to the club swing open, a group of people walking away from them to the smoking area on the other end of the rooftop. jeongguk tried to calm his wildly beating heart and turned around to face yoongi, who was looking a bit flushed. his brow was furrowed in concern and jeongguk started panicking again, realizing that he's once again went and done something he maybe shouldn't have.

"i'm sorry, shit, i'm sorry—"

"hey hey hey, calm down." jeongguk felt yoongi's hands wrapping around him again, pulling him into a hug. he felt yoongi's lips against his shoulder, his words hushed, careful. "can you please tell me what's going on inside your head? i'm kinda in the dark here."

jeongguk shuddered involuntarily and his body started to relax again in yoongi's hold. "i just— i know we haven't really talked about it since—"

"i was giving you space." yoongi stated and lifted his head a little to look into jeongguk's eyes.

"and i'm really thankful for that. but i just— i'm scared that i might not be able to do this. it's not that i don't trust you, i just don't want to drag you down with me. i don't want to hurt you." jeongguk tried to blink the tears away that he could feel forming in the corners of his eyes. he had never been one to cry in front of other people. but something in yoongi's careful touch and the way he spoke so gently made jeongguk emotional yet again.

and then yoongi said the words jeongguk would've never expected. "look, it doesn't have to be that serious."

oh. "oh." jeongguk's body was shocked still, the tears disappeared from his eyes and he felt his walls starting to come back up again. how had he read the situation so wrong? but then again, what had he been expecting, really? he took a step back. "okay, i see, i think there's been a little misunderstan—"

"no, god no, that's not what i meant." yoongi chased after him with wild eyes, cutting off his train of thought. "i don't just— want you, okay? i like you. like, really like you. dating and kissing in the rain -like you."

okay, maybe he really should stop jumping into conclusions so fast. "oh." jeongguk felt his face heating up. mostly from embarrassment.

yoongi gave him a small, tentative smile and took a hold of his hand. the older led them to sit on one of the benches near the wall. they sat down, side to side, jeongguk's hand still in yoongi's. "i just meant you don't have to put so much pressure on yourself here. or this. just, let's do what feels right, when it feels right and we'll go from there."

yoongi seemed so sure when he talked. like he really believed in every single word. believed that this could work. somehow, that made jeongguk believe too, even just a little bit more. "okay," he whispered and yoongi lifted their joint hands to place a soft kiss on his knuckles. jeongguk blushed again.

"and we really have to stop the panicked kissing. we can do better."

jeongguk laughed. he felt bright and happy and sparkling. he could see yoongi's lips curling upwards, too, his eyes full of light. he moved a little, lifted his leg to hang on the other side of the bench so he could fully face the older.

"so, what are you thinking now?" yoongi asked, silently, petting jeongguk's knuckles with his thumb.

jeongguk smiled, a little surge of boldness flashing through him. "i think i'd really like to kiss you again."

"then do it."

and so jeongguk wrapped his hands around yoongi's neck once more, this time bringing their lips together slowly. they were pressed up against each other, yoongi's hand thumbing at his jawline, the other wrapped tightly around his waist and jeongguk felt grounded, like he was just where he was supposed to be. yoongi's lips were soft against his own, moving sure and steady, his hands guiding jeongguk's head to tilt to the side a little. as they came up for air, yoongi placed little soft pecks on the side of his mouth, on the corner of his jaw. jeongguk felt dizzy, in the best possible way. yoongi tasted like the stars. he tasted of all the promises left unsaid and delivered with the careful touches, the gentle draw of lips against his skin.

they sat there just holding each other for a moment and jeongguk could see the reflection of the city lights in yoongi's eyes. he felt content, happy. for once in his life he felt like he belonged. there was no rush, no surge of panic in his mind, at last he felt like they had all the time in the world.

Chapter Text

yoongi blinked his eyes open and it took him a while to figure out what had woken him up. then he heard it. a tiny, almost inaudible whine from his left. he rolled around and wrapped his arms around jeongguk's middle. the younger was shivering in his sleep, tears streaming down on his cheeks, over his nose. yoongi raised his other hand to the side of his face, gently drying the tear tracks with the blanket, his other arm still around the younger's shaking form under the covers.

he wasn't expecting for the younger to wake up, and he didn't, but after a while, the shivering stopped and yoongi could feel his heart rate calming down, their bodies pressed together tightly. yoongi hummed, his alpha pleased to be able to calm the younger with just this, just his presence. he could feel jeongguk's breathing against his shoulder, lips almost touching his skin. yoongi nuzzled his chin over jeongguk's head, tucking him tightly in his arms and tried to go back to sleep himself. but his brain just wouldn't shut up.

this wasn't the first time yoongi'd been woken up to jeongguk having a nightmare. the younger almost never woke up himself and yoongi'd soon realized that just hugging him back to sleep seemed to be working the best. jeongguk was a very tactile person, something yoongi'd only found out in the past two weeks they'd been officially dating. and yoongi didn't mind one bit.

one other thing that yoongi'd noticed was that jeongguk was shy. it wasn't exactly news to him, but this was a different kind of shyness, not the one he acted with when someone simply complimented him or like when he had to initiate a conversation with a stranger. this, yoongi had gathered, came from the way the younger was treated in his previous relationship. jeongguk was naturally attentive and liked to take care of people around him, but he never asked for anything for himself. very rarely demanded anything, not hugs, kisses, nothing. at first, and sometimes still, it confused yoongi's alpha. he wasn't good at reading people from their actions to begin with and it made it that much harder when jeongguk did not only stay silent, but he also tried to hide his need for attention altogether. yoongi's instincts were sometimes telling him to back off, to not give attention when he thought it wasn't needed or wanted and that had caused some misunderstandings. they'd talked about it, but some things just couldn't be fixed with words. they took time. it wasn't like jeongguk was doing it on purpose, it was just the way he'd learned to act in a relationship.

aside from that, all had gone pretty well. they'd been taking it really, really slow, but yoongi was more than happy to, he knew that for jeongguk, this was a huge deal and he needed time to process things. time to learn how to live in a normal, safe environment and with normal, safe relationships. yoongi had encouraged him to spend even more time with other members of their group and it wasn't really a surprise to him anymore when jeongguk called him after work that he'd be staying the night at jimin's. yoongi wasn't possessive to begin with and he was so, so happy that jeongguk wasn't only coming out of his shell in the romantic sense, but he was getting good friends, too. he got worried, of course, his alpha tended to be a little overprotective with the people closest to him. but they were always texting each other during the days and nights they didn't see each other and that eased his mind a little. 

yoongi was woken up from his thoughts by a quiet whisper against his shoulder. "hyung?" 

"sorry," he whispered back, lips against the younger's hair. "did i wake you up?"

"i can hear you thinking." jeongguk shifted a little, brought his arms up between them and nuzzled a little closer. "go back to sleep."

"yeah." yoongi smiled and placed a kiss on the top of his head. "night, gguk-ah."

"night hyung," jeongguk sighed and the room fell silent again. yoongi felt his eyes slipping shut. his presence might be a calming thing for jeongguk, but there was no denying it worked the other way around, too. his mind had a tendency to run away from him, to make him drown in his own thoughts and for the past few weeks, having jeongguk there to notice that and to wake him up from his thoughts had been something yoongi hadn't even noticed he'd needed.

the next time yoongi opened his eyes, it was morning. the other side of the bed was empty and there was a tiny sliver of sunlight brightening up the room. yoongi sat up and was immediately hit with the sweet smell of coffee. he smiled to himself and padded to the kitchen. jeongguk was looking like he'd woken up a while ago, his hair damp from a shower, grey sweatpants hanging low on his waist while he was humming to himself, flipping a spatula around in his hand. yoongi wasn't one to eat in the mornings, other than a few cups of coffee and maybe a bite of toast. still, jeongguk always made breakfast for them both, usually some eggs, vegetables and fruits. and the younger made sure yoongi ate his portion, every day.

"morning," yoongi murmured into jeongguk's neck while wrapping his arms around him from behind.

jeongguk placed his hand over yoongi's. "morning. i made coffee for you." yoongi could hear his smile.

yoongi placed a lingering kiss on his shoulder. "i could tell," he said, lips against the younger's skin, but made no move to untangle himself. jeongguk waddled sideways to get two mugs from the shelve and yoongi waddled with him. he could feel the younger's light chuckle against his chest.

"hyung, i think you need to let go of me if you don't want me to burn the kitchen down."

yoongi groaned and reluctantly let go, attaching himself to the fresh cup of coffee jeongguk was handing to him. he sat down on one of the stools at the counter and sipped his coffee, watching the younger work. he flipped the eggs on the pan and started slicing up some oranges.

"there's something i need to talk to you about." jeongguk's tone was a bit more serious now.

yoongi snapped more awake at that. "yeah? what's up?"

"i've been looking at some apartments." the younger twirled around, the spatula still in his hand, eyes down.

yoongi furrowed his brow and tilted his head. "what?"

"yeah. two of them are really close to here and to work, of course, i thought you'd like to come with me to take a look." jeongguk must have caught on the surprise in his tone, since his own got smaller and smaller towards the end.

yoongi shook his head, trying to get on the same page with the younger. "just, wait a minute. why are you looking for an apartment?"

jeongguk looked at him, biting the inside of his cheek. "that was the plan? that i would find a place once i could afford it? i know it took a little longer than i thought, since i had to buy a lot of stuff to replace the ones that got stolen, but i'm in a really good place now, and i'm solidly booked for like three months—" he stopped his rambling when he saw yoongi's confused expression. "what?"

"i'm sorry, i just. assumed you'd stay here? i didn't know you still wanted to leave." yoongi tried to keep his tone as neutral as possible, but he couldn't help a little bit of hurt from seeping through. he could feel his alpha getting restless, at the thought of jeongguk leaving and simultaneously because he could sense the younger's distress. scent or no scent, jeongguk wasn't exactly the best at hiding his emotions in situations like these.

indeed, the younger was quick to explain himself, eyes wide. "oh my god hyung, no, it's not that i don't like living here. or with you. i—" he slowed down a little, thinking over his words. "we haven't really talked about it. i just think it might be a good thing. if i got a place of my own."

"oh."

"shit, how do explain it?" jeongguk carded his fingers through his hair and sighed, visibly frustrated. yoongi felt bad, he hated making the younger so nervous around him. "i need something of my own. after all, this is your place, your home. i need to be able to stand on my own two feet, i need that little bit of independence. i've never had my own space, if we don't count my car and i don't think that qualifies as a proper home."

yoongi placed the now empty mug on the counter. "well, i didn't know you felt like that."

"i don't want to make you feel bad, hyung, but this is just something i think i have to do. for me. i don't wanna be dependent on anyone. i've been before and i know how it feels like to have the rug pulled out from under you. and i never want to feel like that again. not that i think that's gonna happen here, but i need to be certain." jeongguk was full-on rambling now and yoongi wanted to make it better. he didn't know how. "i hope you understand."

"i do." yoongi tried to smile, but it came out a little forced.

jeongguk walked over to him, a little stiff, like asking for permission. "are you mad at me?" the younger tilted his head down a little and yoongi's heart ached.

he sighed and wrapped his hands around the younger's middle, placing his head against his bare chest. he closed his eyes and tried to choose his words carefully. "no." okay, that didn't sound so convincing. he took a deep breath and leaned back a little so he could look jeongguk straight in the eye. "i do understand. i'm sorry, i hadn't thought about it from your point of view, i hadn't thought about it at all, actually. but i understand. it makes sense. and i want for you to feel safe. if having your own place makes you feel better, then that's what we're gonna find for you."

jeongguk huffed, like he'd been holding his breath. "okay."

yoongi stood up from the stool and reached up so he could place a soft kiss against the side of his mouth. "and i guess we're moving a bit backwards here anyway. usually you start with dating and then move in together, not the other way around."

now jeongguk was chuckling lightly and yoongi felt a little better, his alpha purring in his chest, calming down. "i think backwards suits us."

"i think so too." yoongi smiled and lightly nuzzled at jeongguk's temple with his nose. he was still careful not to accidentally try to scent the younger, so he steered clear from his scent gland.

jeongguk was coming back to his usual, brighter self pretty quickly. "so, will you come with me? to check out the places?" he seemed actually excited about it. and why shouldn't he be.

"of course, gguk-ah."

"jimin wanted to come too, is that okay?"

"sure." yoongi shrugged. "he's probably more use to you with these kind of things anyway."

"give yourself some credit, hyung," jeongguk laughed and pecked his lips lightly before untangling himself to go save the eggs from burning. yoongi watched as he pulled out two plates and placed the fruit neatly on the side of the fried eggs. he smiled to himself. well, at least they were getting better and better at communicating. and that was the most important thing here anyway.

***

"so, do you need any help with your stuff tomorrow?" seokjin swirled around behind the counter, picking up a few empty glasses.

"no, i don't have that much, yoongi-hyung and i have it pretty much covered." jeongguk smiled and sipped on his soda. he'd come to the epiphany straight from work and seokjin had practically shoved him to sit down at the counter, claiming that he hadn't seen the younger in ages. jeongguk had to admit he'd been busy lately, he hadn't had time to stop by the bar that much and last weekend he'd had to work, so he hadn't participated in their usual get-togethers.

"okay, then, do you need any help shopping? there's tons of stuff you're gonna have to get."

"yeah, i guess." jeongguk twirled the half-empty glass in his hands. "i haven't really thought about it."

seokjin chuckled lightly. "start thinking. where are you gonna sleep? you at least need to get a bed as soon as possible. some kitchen stuff. i might have some extras, i'll take a look when i get home."

"thank you, hyung." jeongguk sighed and huffed out a little laugh. "i'm not really good at this stuff."

yoongi walked to the counter, jimin in tow. the older came to stand beside jeongguk and placed his hand to rest at his neck, absentmindedly massaging his stiff muscles. jeongguk leaned into his touch, sighing as he felt the tension melting away. he hadn't even realized how much he'd been stressing about moving, but yoongi was getting better and better at reading him.

jimin plopped down on the stool beside him, placing a tray full of empty glasses on the counter. "good for you i'm the best decorator you could ever wish for." the omega blinked innocently.

jeongguk eyed him, a bit wary. "nothing too crazy, okay?"

hoseok came in from the storage room, catching the end of their conversation. "jimin, i think you should let jeongguk decide what he wants to do with the place. omegas are usually pretty picky about their own space and—" the beta paused and jeongguk raised his head to see yoongi glaring at his friend. "what?"

jeongguk glanced down. he was getting better at it, but it was still new to him that the others knew the entirety of his situation. he'd been avoiding the subject for so long, it was a bit weird hearing someone talk about it so naturally. part of him wished he could do that too.

"oh." hoseok seemed to have gotten the message. "i didn't mean to be rude. i just meant—"

"i know, hyung, it's okay," jeongguk assured and flashed a smile at the beta. "i'm just not used to it."

"hyung, tone down the overprotectiveness," jimin smirked from beside them. "i get that your alpha is running a bit wild still, but we're harmless and you know that."

yoongi rolled his eyes at the chuckling omega and touched his lips to jeongguk's temple.

"so, drinks at your new place tomorrow night?" seokjin chimed in, changing the subject successfully.

"sounds good." jeongguk smiled brightly, happy to have the slight tension melt away from the air. jimin was right. yoongi was a little overprotective, but to be frank, jeongguk didn't mind it that much. it was nice to know he was cared for. not that he didn't know it by now, but he liked to be reminded once in a while.

yoongi wrapped his arm around his waist and tugged a little. "let's go, gguk-ah. we still have to pack, we have to be there bright and early tomorrow morning to receive the keys."

jeongguk groaned but let himself be pulled to his feet. "how do you sound so happy about waking up early?" he muttered, leaning on yoongi's shoulder a little theatrically.

yoongi smiled at him and pecked his lips lightly. "shut up and let me be excited for you."

jimin huffed. "some of us are still single here."

jeongguk could feel his face heating up at that. he knew jimin was just teasing, but he couldn't help the light pink coming to color his cheeks. yoongi just rolled his eyes, pecked his lips once more and started leading them to the door.

***

it was their busiest friday night in ages. yoongi had been on his feet for four hours straight and he still had another four to go. he raised his eyes from the drinks he was making to see taehyung huff and plop down on the only empty stool they had at the counter.

"i see you guys are busy tonight," tae sighed and accepted the bottle yoongi swiped his way across the counter. "us too. i had twelve clients today. twelve. gguk is crazy, i have no idea how he does this."

"what do you mean?" yoongi furrowed his brow, handed the drinks to the waiting customers and went to get a rag to wipe down the counter.

taehyung took a sip and looked at yoongi, head slightly tilted in confusion. "i took his clients today, they all had just consultations and some touch-ups, gguk is fully booked so they didn't fit anywhere else in his schedule."

yoongi threw the rag in the bin under the counter and took the next orders. his brain was busy trying to remember the complicated custom drink one of the beta customers had requested and yoongi was getting frustrated since he still had no idea what tae was talking about. "okay, i'm still lost, why'd you take his clients?"

the omega raised his brow in surprise. "he's sick? he called joonie last night." yoongi stopped in his tracks. tae eyed him, still a little dumbfounded. "you seriously didn't know?"

"no?" yoongi shook his head and went back to mixing. "but i've been so busy the whole day i haven't had time to check my phone, i'm sure he's texted me." he wasn't sure if he was trying to assure taehyung or himself. ever since jeongguk had moved out, yoongi's alpha had been growing restless. he knew that the independence was important to the younger, but now that he couldn't see him every day anymore, he got worried a lot easier.

taehyung could sense the shift in yoongi's scent. "don't worry, i called him a few hours ago, he's fine, just a flu."

"okay, good." yoongi sighed and managed to flash a slight smile. he gave the drinks to the three betas waiting on the other end of the bar, one of them tapping his fingers not-so-patiently on the counter top. yoongi rolled his eyes when he turned back to tae and the omega eyed him, understanding. yoongi didn't usually mind when customers were being rude, but today his patience was running thin.

there were no more waiting customers right at that moment, so he pulled his phone from the pocket of his jeans. "yeah, he's texted me this morning. i'll go check up on him when i get off." yoongi shared a smile with his friend, his mind somewhat eased. a little bit of worry still lingered with him for the rest of the evening. he tried to blame it on his overenthusiastic alpha, he was just restless 'cause the news had caught him by surprise.

and that's how yoongi found himself behind the younger's door, despite the fact that his feet were killing him after the day he'd had, but there was no way he was going to leave his sick boyfriend alone for any longer.

jeongguk opened the door after he knocked twice. he didn't open it fully, just enough so yoongi saw the side of his face.

"hyung? what are you doing here?" his voice was a little startled.

yoongi ignored him and just walked forward, pushing the door open and forcing jeongguk to take a few steps back. yoongi was just about to start rambling about how jeongguk should've called him last night the minute he started feeling bad when he raised his eyes to jeongguk's face and froze.

"so," he said slowly, tone flat, eyeing the younger from head to toe. "i guess you're not sick after all."

Chapter Text

"okay, what the hell is going on here?"

yoongi followed after jeongguk. the younger had just turned around and marched to the kitchen without saying a word. yoongi was beyond frustrated. his thoughts were running wild. he'd been expecting to find the younger laying around in his pj's with a slight fever, maybe, not dressed in a suit, half of his face swollen with an ugly shade of purple and black, dried blood on his white dress shirt.

"hey, i'm talking to you. what's going on?" yoongi could feel his annoyance building up. jeongguk just stood stubbornly in the middle of the kitchen, back turned towards him, not saying a word. "you texted me that you were sick. tae told me you'd called namjoon last night that you couldn't come to work today. i can clearly see that's not the case here."

"no shit," jeongguk mumbled and yoongi's eyes widened. he hadn't heard this kind of tone from the younger in a long time.

"look, i'm worried about you," yoongi walked around him so he could actually see his face while they were talking. jeongguk avoided his gaze. "please, tell me what happened? this is not like you."

jeongguk snapped his head up. yoongi's heart ached at the dark, empty look in the younger's eyes. "how do you know? you've known me for a few months. you met me for the first time after i'd gotten into a fight. how can you tell that this is not the real me?"

"because i know you." yoongi didn't have to even think over his words. "and i'm a pretty good judge of character. i can tell you're hurt right now, and i don't know what happened to make you act like this, but i know that this is not you."

jeongguk just stared at him, his face blank.

yoongi's first surge of annoyance was starting to simmer down, making way for worry and a bit of desperation. "you know you can talk to me," yoongi's tone was softer now. "i've already told you i'm not going anywhere and i still mean it. though you're not making this easy for us right now." he tried reaching for the younger, but jeongguk flinched away from his touch.

"i don't—" he stuttered a little with his words. "it would be better if you'd just go." jeongguk sounded tired. really tired. yoongi was beginning to get flashbacks from the first few times they'd met. how jeongguk had been so reluctant to accept help from anyone, questioning every nice thing anyone tried to do for him.

yoongi's eyes sharpened. "yeah, no. that's not how this works." he sighed, turned around and opened the cabinet he knew contained the first aid kit. "lets start from the basics. sit down and let me take a look at your face. while i do that, you can tell me how this happened."

"no."

yoongi whirled around. "what?"

jeongguk hadn't made a move, but his hands were clenched in fists at his sides. yoongi could see his knuckles turning white. "no. i think you should go."

yoongi's brow furrowed and he placed the supplies he'd gathered down on the counter, slowly. "look, i know you're trying to push me away here because you're scared, of what, i don't know—"

"i can't do this," jeongguk cut him off, eyes on the floor, voice just audible enough for yoongi to hear.

"okay." yoongi's thoughts were running a mile a minute and he could feel the way his alpha started to panic. he could feel jeongguk slipping out of his grasp. "are we still on the subject of what happened to your face or do you mean something else?"

"i don't—" the younger took a deep breath in the middle of his sentence and huffed the air out with force. "—know."

"right." yoongi tapped his fingers against the counter. "i want you to know that this doesn't just end here, okay? i promised i wont force you to do anything you don't want to and i intend to keep that promise. i will go, for now, but i'm still here, whenever you feel like talking."

jeongguk didn't say a word. yoongi walked past him, trying his best to keep himself together just for a while longer.

then he turned around at the door. "i just—" he hesitated. jeongguk hadn't moved, still just stood there, silently, refusing to turn around and face him. yoongi closed his eyes, searching for the right words. he absolutely didn't want to just leave things like this, but he wasn't the only one here who had the power to do something. "you know, relationships are not only about what you feel you can or can't do. at some point, you just have to let people love you. that's something you have to learn to accept. i want to help you and i really am here for you, but i can't do shit if you won't let me."

"i know," jeongguk whispered to the floor.

"and if you don't want to talk to me, fine, just, please call someone. jimin, namjoon, anyone. you have people now. remember that." yoongi's voice was beginning to sound more like pleading. jeongguk didn't give him an answer this time.

every single cell in his body was screaming at him, begging for him to just stay, make the younger talk, just, do something, anything. but yoongi forced himself to walk out and close the door after him. he leaned his back on the cold metal. he wanted to scream, he wanted to cry, he felt like his alpha was literally ripping his insides to shreds, going feral inside of him. but he forced himself to take a step, and then another, until he was out of the building. it took all his self control, but he didn't turn back.

***

the first thing that jeongguk grabbed was one of the new plates he'd bought a few days ago on a shopping spree with jimin. it shattered to the floor with a deafening sound. it wasn't enough. luckily, he'd bought a lot.

ten minutes later jeongguk sat down in the middle of the porcelain pieces littering his kitchen floor. he wanted to cry, but the tears wouldn't come. he just felt numb. all he could feel was this dull nothingness that was digging a hole in his chest and making a home there.

he felt once again like he had no way out, like he'd run into a wall.

he should've known that the good in his life wouldn't last. nothing was ever that easy. jeongguk chuckled dryly to himself.

he thought back to last night. how he had left from work, happy after a successful day. he remembered the shock that'd went through his body when he'd realized that the person leaning on the brick wall of his home building had been his brother.

***

"what are you doing here?"

jeonhyun pushed himself off the wall. "i wanted to see you. i'm glad you're not having the same reaction as last time."

jeongguk thought about that evening a few months ago. how he'd had an actual panic attack after seeing his brother just standing there, in the middle of the waiting area at the reflection, a piece of his past in the middle of his new life, looking so out of place he'd at first thought he'd been dreaming.

"yeah, well. i was kinda expecting for you to show up again. didn't think the first time was really an accident."

"it wasn't." jeonhyun shifted his weight from one leg to the other, looking a little unsure. "look, i'm really sorry. about everything that's happened. and i know you maybe don't wanna hear this, but i truly had no idea what mom and dad were doing back then. i thought you'd just ran away from home. at least that's what they told me. i came home from school at the end of the semester and you were just gone. and i had no idea how to reach you. but i wanted to. so bad."

jeongguk eyed his brother a little wary, clutching at the strap of his backpack with a little more force than necessary. "you're right, i don't really wanna hear it."

"gguk." jeonhyun took a step towards him. "you're still my brother. and i'm yours. please, just, give me a chance."

after he'd presented, his brother had been sent to this fancy boarding school overseas. it was true that jeonhyun hadn't been home for most of the year and thus, hadn't been there to witness everything that had gone down. still, jeongguk wasn't sure. he'd spent so much time resenting his family, resenting his brother. he hadn't liked the feeling, he'd hated that he had envied his own brother. they'd been so close when they were little and jeonhyun was the only member of his family he'd actually caught himself missing from time to time. but jeongguk had his doubts.

"does dad know you're here? what would he say? his golden boy, slumming it away with the outcast?"

"i don't care." jeonhyun's eyes were a little fierce now. "i don't care about any of it. they can think whatever they want, i'm here because i want to be here."

jeongguk sighed. "so, what exactly is it that you want?"

"i want to get to know you again. and i want to keep in touch." jeonhyun was looking at him with painfully hopeful eyes. "i want my big brother back."

***

as much as jeongguk hated to admit it, he'd missed that. he knew he was better off without his family that had only caused him pain. but he still missed having one. he missed the days before he'd presented, missed playing around with his brother, missed having a place where he would always belong.

so, jeongguk had found himself walking in front of a restaurant located in the fancier part of the town earlier that evening. jeonhyun had asked to meet him there, to catch up for real. jeongguk had been hesitant at first, he wasn't really comfortable dressing up and going back to the ways of his past, but he'd still decided to go. his brother had gone out of his way to track him down, least he could do was put on a suit and deal with it for a night.

he should've just stayed home.

***

jeongguk felt someone grabbing at his arm and pulling him around the corner. his complaints died on his tongue when he turned around and was met with the face he'd never thought he would have to see again.

"did you really think you'd get out of that so easily," his ex smirked and eyed him from head to toe. "aren't we fancy tonight. what's the occasion?"

"what—"

"hi gguk." his brother stepped up from behind the three other guys jeongguk had never seen before. "i wasn't sure it would work, but i guess haneul was right, you really are just that dumb. ate up every word, fucking eager as a little puppy to come and meet me here."

jeongguk was speechless. his body was frozen still from the shock, his mind drawing a blank.

"so," haneul took a drag of his cigarette, leaning on the wall, drawing the syllable out. jeongguk wanted to punch the sickening smug expression off his face, but his body was locked in place. "that neat little trick of yours cost me a lot of money. business was a little slow for a while. but now you're gonna pay me back, so it all seems to be working out here in the end."

so that's why he'd gotten away so easily. for the first three months or so after jeongguk had gotten out from juvie, he'd been so paranoid, waiting for haneul or one of his guys to jump out at him everywhere he went. but if haneul had been caught, that explained why it'd taken over a year for him to come after jeongguk. he should've known. nothing was ever that easy. not with these kind of people.

"and what if i don't?"

"oh, i wouldn't worry about that. i'm sure we'll find you a good motivator."

jeongguk was painfully familiar with threats like that. he'd seen enough of these kind of conversations back when he'd lived with haneul. this was going just according to the plan; haneul wanted something from someone, he found out who or what their weaknesses were, and he used them against the person that owed him. fair was not a word these people had in their vocabulary.

but this wasn't just business. this was personal. jeongguk hadn't just caused haneul financial troubles, he'd gotten the man thrown into jail. jeongguk had no doubt that his ex was prepared to do anything it took to get back at him. humiliation didn't sit well with the alpha.

"is that all?"

"for now. and don't worry about how to contact me, i know where to find you."

jeongguk had no doubts about that. he turned to leave, his heart beating in his chest almost painfully hard, ready to bolt when he'd gotten far enough from their sight. but one of the guys grabbed his arm again, stopping him on his tracks.

"just one other thing." haneul flicked the cigarette out of his hand. he walked straight in front of jeongguk, towering over him, looking down with a slight smirk on his face. jeongguk could just stand there, frozen, as the alpha drew back his hand. his fist collided with the side of jeongguk's face with a sickening crunch. pain shot through his nose to his cheekbone and jeongguk staggered back, his hand flying to his face.

"just a little reminder." haneul cracked his knuckles, loudly. "i see you're not the cowering little pup anymore, talking back so bravely." his tone was mocking. "but it would be wise to remember who's really in charge here."

jeongguk just stared down at his hands, red from the blood streaming down from his broken nose. he hated himself at that moment for not being able to speak up, or defend himself in any way. haneul turned around, threw his arm over jeonhyun's shoulder and the two of them started walking back to the alley, the three strange men quick to follow. jeongguk stood frozen still for a while, pain pulsing through the side of his face, blood still trickling down on his shirt.

***

jeongguk knew that haneul's threats weren't empty. he knew he was in major trouble. but the fact that everyone around him, that yoongi, all of his friends, could be in trouble because of him, that was just something jeongguk couldn't deal with. and there was still the question of why jeonhyun was suddenly running with haneul. jeongguk had no idea. but that was just one other thing he had no energy to figure out right now.

jeongguk's eyes caught on the little pouch sitting on his kitchen counter. it's funny how the one thing that had brought him comfort in these past two years was now something he resented. if he hadn't been on blockers, he'd been able to detect the scent of haneul on his brother. he'd maybe been able to tell instantly that jeonhyun had been lying. maybe he wouldn't be in this situation right now.

jeongguk got up from the floor and walked to the counter. he picked up the little pouch and dropped it straight in the trash. he'd lived his life practically half-blind for almost two years. he'd already stopped running from himself. maybe it was time to stop hiding too.

***

"oh, hi gguk, you're early today—" taehyung's voice died in his throat when he saw jeongguk's face. and then he was hit with the unmistakable scent of lemons, sharp and sour in the air. "what—"

"i don't really wanna talk about it." tae watched, speechless, as jeongguk just walked to his little corner of the shop, black hood over his head, shoulders drawn up, like he was trying to hide from the whole world. kind of pointless with the way half of his face was covered in bruises.

he marched after the younger. "gguk, what the hell? you don't just show up with your face looking like that and not talk about it." he sat down on the chair before jeongguk's desk. "i see you've dropped the blockers too? what's going on? is everything alright?"

jeongguk eyed him, his face blank. then he just turned back around, going through his supplies. tae wasn't sure if he was actually looking for something, or just trying to seem busy in the hopes that he would be left alone.

"yeah, okay, dumb question," tae huffed, brow furrowed. "but really, talk to me. please."

jeongguk huffed and turned to face him. "i ran into my brother," he said finally. "not the most pleasant of family gatherings, but i'll live."

"okay." taehyung wasn't really satisfied with the younger's rather short explanation, but he decided to let that go for now. "and the blockers?"

"i just thought it was time." jeongguk shrugged, gaze avoidant.

"right." taehyung crossed his arms at his chest and raised his brow a little. "look, i know this is none of my business, but is everything alright with you and yoongi-hyung?"

jeongguk seemed a bit startled at that. "why do you ask?"

"well, i stopped by the bar before my first client a few hours ago and hyung looked and smelled pretty much the same as you. without the—" taehyung motioned at the younger's face. "so. i just thought that maybe something happened?"

jeongguk twirled his sketchbook in his hands, biting at his bottom lip. "we had a fight," he said, silently, his gaze flitting up to taehyung and then down again.

"and?"

"i don't know, hyung." he placed the little black book down and leaned his forearms on the desktop. "i think i fucked up. pretty badly." jeongguk dropped his head in his hands. taehyung could practically taste the younger's distress in the air. he wasn't used to being able to smell him, but that train of thought was quickly forgotten when he saw a few drops dripping down on the papers scattered around under jeongguk's arms.

"hey, oh my god, please don't cry or i'm gonna cry too." tae was quick to stand up, circle around the table and gather the shaking form of the younger omega in his arms. "look, i'm sure it's just a misunderstanding, i don't think there's anything you two wont be able to figure out." he picked jeongguk's face up in between his hands and swiped gently at his tear-stained cheeks with his thumbs, smiling a little watery himself.

jeongguk sniffled, fingers clutching at the hem of tae's t-shirt. "i'm not so sure. i practically told him i wanted to break up."

tae bit his lip. "well, do you? wanna break up?"

"of course i don't. but it's not just that, it's—" jeongguk sniffled once more and then smiled, a sad little smile that tae wanted gone as soon as possible. "he doesn't deserve this. me. i'm so fucked up, i don't even know where or how to start fixing everything and hyung is so understanding and sweet and he's always there when i need him, but—" jeongguk raised his eyes at him, shining with the tears that threatened to start falling again. "i can't be there for him. i'll only get him in trouble. and that's not fair to him."

"neither is this, whatever it is that you're doing here." tae hooked his chin over the younger's shoulder and hugged him, tight. "let me just be straight with you here. you're being an idiot. this is not how relationships work, you can't decide things like this on your own, you have to talk about them. where did all the great communication skills go?"

jeongguk chuckled a little. "i know, i just—"

"doesn't sound like you know." tae drew back again to look the younger in the eyes. "here's what you're going to do. you're going to go talk to him, today, no arguments. and you're gonna let him choose. if he wants to be with you and you want to be with him, you guys are gonna find a way to make it work."

jeongguk was silent for a while. tae could tell that he was calming down, but the bitterness of his scent wasn't going anywhere. "he's mad at me," the younger whispered and bit the inside of his cheek.

taehyung huffed out a little laugh. "of course he's mad at you. and that's why you're going to go there and apologize."

"but i—" jeongguk's eyes were wide.

taehyung drew back his hood and ruffled his mess of a hair, gently. "shut up and get to work. you only have three clients today, i suggest you start thinking about the best apology speech you can come up with." he picked a few tissues from the table and placed them in jeongguk's hands.

"yeah, okay." well, at least he wasn't arguing back anymore.

"and gguk?" taehyung quipped as he started back towards the front desk. jeongguk raised his eyes at him and tilted his head a little in question. "throw in some of those starry eyes of yours. they're kind of his weakness," tae smirked and jeongguk rolled his eyes at him. taehyung chuckled at himself and went back to his own interrupted work. those two were going to be just fine. he was sure of it.

Chapter Text

Chapter Text

jeongguk was restless. he'd been trying to fall back asleep for half an hour now, just tossing and turning and cursing inwardly at his omega.

he forced his body to stay still and just stared at the ceiling, frustrated out of his mind. the alarm clock on the nightstand blinked at the edge of his peripheral vision. three thirty-five in the morning. great. he flopped around and buried his face in the pillow.

jeongguk had forgotten a lot of things about his inner wolf in these past two years. he knew it would take some time to get used to it again. but right now he wished he would have more control. his wolf was screaming at him, wanting to roll around on the bed, to run through the whole apartment, to mark it, to make sure that his and his alpha's scents were intertwined, both prominent. jeongguk rolled his eyes at his instincts and tried to suppress the need to make it clear for everyone that set foot inside that yoongi was his and he was yoongi's.

yeah, it was great that they'd made up and all, but his omega was overreacting a little bit.

"what are you doing?"

jeongguk flinched when he heard the alpha's low rumble from his left. "i didn't mean to wake you up, i swear. my stupid omega won't calm down." it came out as more of a whine than he'd meant.

"not stupid, don't say that," yoongi grumbled, eyes still shut, and dragged jeongguk closer by the waist. they laid there chest to chest, legs tangled together, yoongi's lips ghosting over the top of jeongguk's head. despite being the slightly taller one of the two, jeongguk liked the way yoongi made him feel small. he was safe, taken care of, fully content curled up against the alpha. he felt his omega purring in his chest, relaxing a little. he sighed and closed his eyes, finally calm enough to try to get some sleep.

jeongguk had no idea how much time passed, but next thing he knew he was blinking his eyes open again. this time he didn't feel the restlessness inside of him and a smile spread on his lips. he slid his arm around the alpha's waist. yoongi hadn't let go even when they had both fallen back to sleep, their bodies were still connected from head to toe. jeongguk's heart felt full, all warm and fuzzy and he placed a little soft kiss on yoongi's exposed shoulder.

jeongguk nuzzled his way up to yoongi's neck, still a little hazy from sleep, not fully in control of his actions, just seeking the warmth and comfort of the older. he nosed at yoongi's scent gland and froze when a tiny gasp escaped from the alpha's lips.

jeongguk drew back a little, embarrassed. "i'm sorry, i-"

yoongi dragged him back and pressed his lips to jeongguk's hairline. "it's okay," he mumbled and jeongguk could feel the words on his skin. "i was just surprised. go ahead, if you want."

well, jeongguk couldn't exactly blame him for that, remembering what had happened last time. but that was all in the past and the situation now was entirely different. and jeongguk wanted nothing more than to be enveloped in the comfort of yoongi's scent. he kissed his way back to yoongi’s neck and minutes later fell back asleep, dreaming of green forests and blue skies. he was finally home.

***

yoongi blinked his eyes open. it didn't take long for him to figure out what had woken him up when he heard a loud crash coming from somewhere in his apartment. he turned his head to the side. jeongguk was still sound asleep next to him, curled up on his side, hugging one of yoongi’s arms to his chest.

another crash, some muffled cursing from the other side of the door and yoongi was up. his heart was beating in his chest and he made his way into the kitchen faster than he'd ever moved at this time in the morning.

he was greeted by a familiar voice. one he hadn’t heard in a long time. "ah, did i wake you up? i really tried to be quiet, i guess i'm not as stealthy as i thought."

yoongi couldn't do much else than stare at the woman standing in the middle of his kitchen. "what the hell are you doing here? how'd you get in?"

"i have my ways," his sister smirked and turned back to the cabinets, rummaging through them with fury. "you should really get more kitchen stuff. how do you own only one frying pan? how do you survive?"

yoongi tried to motion to her to be quiet, but it was already too late. he heard soft steps from the bedroom door behind him and turned to see jeongguk wandering in the kitchen, still half-asleep, still half-naked and rubbing his eyes so cutely yoongi almost forgot all about his sister's sudden appearance.

"what's going on?" jeongguk muttered and his eyes widened when they landed on the third person in the room.

"nothing, go back to sleep." yoongi swatted at him, ignoring his sister who was whipping around so fast yoongi wondered how her head stayed on her shoulders.

jeongguk just stared, his mouth falling open. "wha—"

"oh, i'm sorry, i didn't know you had company." she hopped over to them, smiling brightly and greeted jeongguk with poorly hidden enthusiasm. "hi, it's so nice to meet you! really, i mean it. yoongi never brings his boys home, so you must be special."

"please shut up," yoongi groaned. "jeongguk, this is my sister yona. she's just leaving."

"no i'm not," yona chirped happily. "i brought breakfast. anyone hungry?" she rushed back to the counter and started unloading the two grocery bags that she'd apparently brought with her.

jeongguk's eyes flitted back and forth between yoongi and his sister, wide as saucers. "i didn't know you had a sister?" he whispered, brow furrowed in confusion.

"ah, we're not that close," yoongi muttered and ignored the glare he received from the kitchen.

jeongguk tilted his head. "not that close? she has a key to your apartment."

"no, she doesn't. yona has her ways." yoongi rolled his eyes and pulled jeongguk backwards back to the bedroom. "let’s get dressed. i don't think we have much of a choice."

"no, you don’t," yona chirped after them. "breakfast in ten!"

***

"seriously. i still can't believe you have a boyfriend? miracles do happen i guess." yona twirled her fork around on the plate and smirked at them. jeongguk tilted his head down, blushing furiously and yoongi groaned beside him.

"i wouldn't say a miracle," the alpha mumbled.

"what do you mean?" jeongguk’s curiosity won over his embarrassment. his eyes flitted between the siblings. the resemblance was clear. they both had the same smile, same attentive eyes. yona was an alpha too, her scent unusually mellow for one, jeongguk couldn't exactly pinpoint the right fragrance, but it made him think of springtime. cherry blossoms, maybe?

and now she was laughing, loud and bright. "well, my dear little brother here hasn't really been the commitment type. like, ever." she ignored the vigorous eye-rolling from yoongi's side of the table and continued, "i don't think you've ever had anyone you'd introduce as your boyfriend? correct me if i'm wrong."

yoongi stayed silent and nibbled on a slice of watermelon.

"i see." jeongguk made a mental note to ask about it later when they were alone. he somehow got the feeling that this was not the place.

"oh no, i didn't mean anything bad, i'm just surprised," yona rushed to add.

"i love the way you make it sound, really." yoongi's tone was dark, his words a little too quick and short and jeongguk noticed a shift in the alphas scent. not a positive one. "i've never met anyone interesting enough."

"and now you have!" yona gestured towards jeongguk and turned her attention to him. "really, jeongguk, tell me more about yourself. i'm dying to know more about you and how’d you got yoongi to settle down." she leaned her chin on her hands, elbows placed on each side of her now-empty plate.

jeongguk blinked, a little flustered at suddenly being at the center of attention. "i don't think there's anything that special about me."

"i'm sure that's not the case." yona's smile was a little softer. "well, tell me how you guys met?"

jeongguk saw yoongi's glare from the corner of his eye. "yona, leave him be."

"i'm just making conversation here." yona blinked innocently at his brother.

"hyung, it's okay," jeongguk placed a hand on yoongi's thigh and flashed him a small smile. then he turned his attention back to the other alpha, who was eyeing their exchange with poorly masked curiosity. "well, i guess we first saw each other when i went by jin-hyung's bar looking for a job. and the second time we really met, well—"

"gguk-ah—" yoongi's tone had a hint of a warning in it, but jeongguk was having a hard time figuring out why. yoongi’s scent was turning more bitter by the minute and jeongguk had no idea what was going on.

his brow furrowed in confusion. "hyung, she's your sister, i think it's okay to tell her?"

yoongi stared at him for a few long seconds, then shook his head and turned his attention back to his nearly untouched plate. "go ahead."

jeongguk had lost count on the mental notes he'd made in the past half an hour. he ignored the darkening undertone in the older's scent and turned back to yona, who was now watching them with slight concern. the expression was almost disturbingly familiar. jeongguk had seen the exact same one on yoongi's face more times than he would like to admit.

"well, the time we really met was when yoongi-hyung took me in and patched me up after i'd gotten into a fight." he tried to lighten the mood with a chuckle, but it came out a little forced. "not my proudest moment, I gotta admit."

yona was looking at him with sympathetic eyes. "aw, poor thing. who'd you get into a fight with? i hope you weren't badly hurt?"

jeongguk shook his head. "just some bruises, nothing major. it was some random guys, jumped me at an alleyway a few blocks from here, not that much of a story there. i guess they were after money or something. gave up pretty fast when they realized i wasn’t really worth mugging."

yona's bright smile had a hint or sorrow in it now. "ah, i'm still sorry. but good thing you got yoongi here to save you."

"yeah." jeongguk smiled and glanced at yoongi. the alpha was still staring stubbornly at his plate, not showing any interest in joining in on the conversation.

yona cleared her throat a little after a few minutes of silence had passed. "so, yoongi-ah, tell me how you've been?"

"same old."

"i wouldn't exactly say so," yona giggled, ignoring his brother's gloomy expression. "you still work at jin's bar? what was it called again? epiphany?"

"yeah."

yona sighed and leaned back on her chair, rolling her eyes in mock frustration. "really brother, give me something here. i didn't come all this way to get just one syllable words from you."

"why exactly are you here?" yoongi snapped his gaze up, his eyes sharpening a little.

jeongguk's omega started to get a little restless. yoongi's scent was all over the place, he clearly tried his best to hide his irritation, but the emotion was so strong it was still seeping through. the atmosphere in the room hadn't been the lightest to begin with, but now it was darkening, rapidly, and jeongguk was caught between two alphas glaring at each other.

"what? i can't come visit my little brother?" yona quipped, her eyes now a mirror image of yoongi’s.

"you can." yoongi stated calmly, his voice low. "but you never have. i haven't heard from you in three years. so, excuse me for my confusion."

yona crossed her hands at her chest. "well, i have some business around the area so i though it was about time to be reunited with my brother. it's not like i've been drowning in your messages either."

yoongi chuckled darkly. "i see you haven't changed. i can only imagine what business you could have here."

jeongguk was starting to get worried for real. the kitchen was now full of pheromones, the air a little thick for him to breathe. "guys—"

both alphas ignored him and shot up from their chairs.

yona flailed her arms in the air. "just because you wanted to leave everything and everyone behind, doesn't mean i did. i know this life is not for everyone, but i don't come here to judge you and your lifestyle, do i?"

a little growl escaped from yoongi's lips. "exactly. i left to get away from all of it. unfortunately, that included you too, but i don't regret it. not one bit."

"i know you don't. and i'm not saying you should." yona sighed and took a step back, clearly trying to calm the situation. "i don't wanna fight with you. i'm sorry, i shouldn't have brought that up."

yoongi eyed her, now looking more tired than anything. "why are you really here? i don't mean in town, i mean here, in my kitchen? and don't try to tell me you just wanted to catch up."

"i just thought—" yona bit her lip. "never mind. i don't know. i wanted to see you."

yoongi's face remained expressionless, his scent still strong in the air. "you've seen me."

jeongguk swore he could see a flash of hurt in yona's eyes, but it was gone and concealed so fast he couldn't be sure.

"i'm happy for you, bother, i really am. i see that you're doing good." her smile was a bit shaky.

"i am."

"well, then. i can see when i'm beginning to overstay my welcome." yona clapped her hands together and turned to the kitchen to pick her bag from the counter. then she turned to jeongguk and flashed him a smile, a lot sadder than it had been just an hour ago. "it was nice to meet you, jeongguk. take care of yoongi for me, would you?"

jeongguk blinked, his eyes a little wide, his mind trying and failing to keep up with all the rapidly shifting emotions in the air. "of course. it was nice to meet you too."

jeongguk watched as she glanced at yoongi one last time and then walked to the hall. he waited for the door to click shut and then he turned to the alpha, more confused than annoyed, but annoyed still.

"what was that?"

yoongi just stood there, leaning on the wall, hands crossed at his chest. "what was what?"

jeongguk rolled his eyes and shot a look at the evasive alpha. "all that? you've never told me you had a sister? and what was all that about business and lifestyle and leaving and—" he tilted his head, trying to keep his tone as neutral as possible, the heaviness in the alpha's scent still fresh in his mind. "i'm confused?"

yoongi sighed, pushed himself off the wall he’d been leaning to and walked back to sit down next to jeongguk. "i wasn't trying to keep anything from you, it just hasn't come up." yoongi carded his fingers through his hair and massaged his temple, a telltale sign that the alpha was beginning to have a headache. "ah, my relationship with yona is just? complicated? it's hard to explain."

"so?" jeongguk didn’t want to give up so easily. "now that it came up, could you at least try?"

"gguk-ah," yoongi sighed, clearly uncomfortable.

"what? i'm curious. now that i think of it, you've never really told me anything about yourself. or your past. don't you think it's weird? this is exactly what i was talking about. i've been selfish and only blabbered about my life and my problems. i want for you to be able to talk to me too."

"there's really not much to tell. yona is my big sister, three years older than me, she practically raised me when we were little and i got caught up with some questionable people for a while. i left, yona didn't." yoongi’s eyes softened a little and he took one of jeongguk’s hands between his. "look, i'm not trying to keep secrets from you, but all of that is in the past. i've made my peace with it. I don’t talk about it, ‘cause there’s nothing to talk about."

"okay." jeongguk bit his bottom lip. "i'm not trying to pressure you or anything, i'm just trying to get to know you. the good and the bad. the past and the present. i wanna know everything about you."

"i know, gguk-ah. i'll tell you all about it, just, not now." yoongi pecked his cheek and drew back, a small smile on his lips. "you have a client in two hours. you go get ready for work, i'll make us some coffee."

"tea,” jeongguk mumbled and ignored yoongi’s amused chuckle. "and how do you know i have a client in two hours?"

yoongi got up and walked to the counter. "namjoon texted me and asked me to remind you. you left your phone at work, again."

"i'm not used to having a phone.” jeongguk stood up too and started to collect the plates from the table. then he whirled around. "wait, how did namjoon know i'd be here?"

"news travel fast in our group." yoongi flashed him a smile over his shoulder while reaching for the coffee. why he kept in on the top shelf, jeongguk could never understand.

"right."

jeongguk wanted to give yoongi the same space the older had given him, the same patience. forcing someone to talk never worked, but he would be lying if he said it didn't bother him.

***

the clock had run from him again. the sun was already long since gone down when yoongi finally climbed the stairs up to his apartment, his mind equally exhausted with his body.  

he was greeted with warmth when he opened the door. there was this delicious smell of something cooking and yoongi could hear jeongguk's soft humming coming from the kitchen. he smiled to himself, kicked his shoes off and padded towards the low sound.

"hi," yoongi smiled and brushed his hand over the small of the younger's back. "what are you making?"

jeongguk smiled and turned his head to accept a kiss. "pasta. i was pretty tired when i came home, just wanted to do something quick."

"something quick would be just throwing instant ramen in a pot, you're downplaying your cooking again," yoongi mumbled into jeongguk's shoulder and yawned.

"rough day at work?"

"not really, just tired."

jeongguk's brow furrowed and yoongi was sure the younger had just been about to start scolding him about working too hard when his phone started vibrating on the table. yoongi watched as jeongguk glanced at the thing and froze when he saw the number flashing on the screen. odd, but yoongi was a bit too tired to think any more of it.

"i gotta take this." jeongguk's voice cracked and he cleared his throat. "keep an eye on the food for a minute?"

yoongi stared at the ladle sticking out from the pot. "what exactly is 'keeping an eye on the food'? what do i do?"

"just, stir it? don't let the pasta get all sticky," jeongguk quipped over his shoulder while rushing towards the bedroom.

"what constitutes as sticky?" it would be the understatement of the year to say yoongi wasn't really all that familiar with cooking. "it's bubbling. is it supposed to be bubbling?"

"it's fine, that's really impossible to ruin, you're all good." and then jeongguk shut the door behind him and yoongi was left alone in the kitchen, ladle in hand, having no idea what to do next.

"impossible to ruin," yoongi muttered, staring angrily at the rapidly multiplying bubbles on the surface of the sauce. "we'll see about that."

"what?"

yoongi eyed the door at the loud squealing.

"how did you get my number?"

yes, eavesdropping was bad, but jeongguk had to know these walls weren't exactly soundproof. yoongi tried to concentrate on stirring the sauce, but he couldn't help it, he heard every word, muffled, but still audible enough to make sense of.

"okay, i don't care, i have no interest in these games of yours, just tell me what you want."

yoongi's brow furrowed and he forgot all about the food for a moment.

"are you crazy? i don't have that kind of money!"

money? now yoongi was really starting to get worried. who was he talking with?

"stay away from them."

yoongi had never ever before heard jeongguk growling.

"fine! i'll figure it out. just— give me two weeks."

jeongguk's voice was muffled by the door between them, but yoongi was still able to hear the frustration in his tone.

"yeah, whatever. goodbye."

yoongi kept his eyes strictly on the stove. he heard jeongguk padding in and with him came a cloud of bitter air. thick, sour mixture of confusion, anger and? fear?

he tried to keep his voice leveled. he had a feeling that jeongguk wouldn't really be happy if he knew yoongi had heard practically every word. "who was it?"

"they had the wrong number," jeongguk mumbled, half-heartedly and came to stand beside yoongi, his eyes distracted.

yoongi was pretty sure the younger knew he wasn't being very convincing. he decided to let it go for now. he didn't want to pry, jeongguk would tell him when he was comfortable to do so. "oh, okay." yoongi pointed at the stove. "ready to eat?"

jeongguk blinked at the food. "you burnt the sauce."

"i told you."

"it's okay. i think you have some ramen here somewhere."

yoongi tried to keep his emotions in check, but he wasn't that worried since the younger was rusty with his omega senses and kinda preoccupied anyway. he eyed the other over the table while they ate in silence. why was he lying? did the phone call have anything to do with whatever had happened a few days ago? yoongi cursed at himself for not asking about that sooner. he'd almost let it slip out of his mind, being so happy that things were good with jeongguk again. but clearly something was wrong. very wrong. and with all the things jeongguk had opened up to him about, how big was this thing that he was still lying about it, after all that they'd been through?

he wasn't sure if it was the right thing to do, not letting jeongguk know he'd heard the phone call. yoongi didn’t want to cause a scene, not now when things were finally calm again. all he could do now was wait and see.

Chapter Text

they were running, together, paws thumping on the ground with the same beat. the warmth of the sun on his fur, his heart roaring in his chest. he looked to his right and saw the reflection of his own bright blue eyes in the red ones of the other. they leaped together over a fallen trunk and continued forward at full speed, hearts beating as one.

then, something stopped him. hands grasping at his fur from behind, yanking him backwards by his hind legs. the one with the red eyes continued forward and he could just watch as his frame got smaller and smaller and then disappeared into the blackness of the woods. he panicked, turned around to try to see what had taken ahold of him, but all he could see was darkness. the sun was gone. 

the world was silent again. there was no wind, no rustle of the leaves under him. it felt like his own heart had stopped beating too. 

he howled. the sound was deafening in the hollow, empty silence. full of sadness, loneliness, longing.

there was no answer. 

 ***

"so?"

jeongguk was woken up from his thoughts and he glanced up, startled. yoongi was looking at him over the table, like he was expecting an answer, but jeongguk had no idea what he'd been talking about.

he blinked at the alpha. "what?"

"earth to jeongguk," the older sighed but still flashed him a slight smile. "you didn't hear a word i just said."

jeongguk shook his head and straightened up a bit. "i'm sorry. it’s been a long day."

yoongi eyed him, barely detectable undertone of concern in his woodsy scent. "you're working too hard. i've seen you once this week. i'm starting to think i'll have to come and get a tattoo if i want to see you at all."

"it hasn't been that bad," jeongguk mumbled, wringing his hands together under the table.

the alpha raised his brow at that. "it kinda has."

jeongguk knew full well that yoongi was right. he'd been working like crazy, fully booked around the clock, taking clients even on his days off. it was the only way he'd be able to get the money he needed. but he wasn't going to tell yoongi about all that. he'd already caused enough headache for him and all of their friends and things were just beginning to mellow down. jeongguk didn't want to become a burden for them. he could handle this on his own. just a few more weeks. then it'd be over. for good.

jeongguk placed his elbows on the table and rested his head on his palms, signalling to the older that he was giving his full attention to him. "okay, so what were you saying?"

yoongi smiled warmly at him over the table. "i just asked if you're coming tomorrow. jin says he's missed you. and jimin too. you didn't show up yesterday. you know, friday drinks are kinda mandatory."

jeongguk knew the alpha was trying to lighten up the mood, but he still felt a pang of guilt in his chest. "i'm sorry, i had—"

"a client, i know." yoongi cracked his neck and stood up, collecting their dinner plates from the table. turning around and walking back to the sink, he continued, "look, gguk-ah. i know you like your work and you don't want to say no to anyone but you know, making time for your friends is important too."

guilt guilt guilt. "i need the money," he said, glad that yoongi was facing away from him. it would be so much harder lying straight to his face.

"money is not everything." yoongi placed the dishes in the sink and the clicking of ceramic to steel made jeongguk wince. 

"maybe not to you," he whispered under his breath and immediately cursed at himself. if he was trying to keep the whole situation a secret from yoongi, this wasn’t helping. the alpha was too perceptive for his own good.

yoongi whirled around, brow furrowed. "what?"

"nothing." jeongguk bit his bottom lip and searched his brain for words that would divert the conversation to something else. "look, i'll see what i can do. but i don't think i can come tomorrow. i'm already booked for the whole day and i can't cancel on such a short notice. it wouldn’t be fair, most of the clients tomorrow have been waiting for weeks."

"okay." yoongi leaned his back on the edge of the counter and crossed his arms at his chest, tilting his head in thought. "maybe you can come by after? even for a little while. i know everyone would like to see you. tae said you've been so busy at work you barely have time to say hello."

"i said i'll see what i can do. this guilt-tripping doesn't really help." he didn’t mean to be snappy, but he had already been constantly stressed for the past week and now he was basically straight up lying to his boyfriend. how had this become so messed up?

"i'm not guilt-tripping you." yoongi’s eyes flashed with the tiniest amount of hurt and jeongguk regretted his words even more. "i'm just worried."

jeongguk wanted to find his way out of this conversation as soon as possible. "don't be. i'm fine." 

"yeah." the alpha didn’t sound so convinced, but he didn’t continue, so jeongguk was almost sure he was in the clear. for now. 

he stood up and took a cautious step toward the elder. he felt like he needed to apologize, but he wasn’t sure how to, or what for. "look, i need to get going. i have to get up early tomorrow."

yoongi nodded, but didn’t move. "i know."

jeongguk dropped his head down, suddenly very interested in the pattern of the wooden floors. "are you mad at me?"

yoongi sighed and pushed himself off the counter. "i'm not." he walked to jeongguk and wrapped his arms around his middle, nuzzling gently at his neck. "i just wish you'd let me help you. i’m not trying to make you feel bad, or guilty, i just miss you."

"i’m sorry, i didn't mean that." jeongguk mumbled. he tried to swallow down the lump in his throat, but the bad feeling wasn’t going anywhere. 

yoongi swiped his thumbs over his cheekbones and placed a little kiss on his nose. "if you need money, if you're having some problems with that, i can help you."

jeongguk tried to smile, but it was a little too shaky and fleeting to be genuine. "thank you, but i'm not gonna take money from you."

"worth a try." yoongi placed his lips on the corner of his mouth. "are you sure you can't stay over?"

i want to stay, but i’ve been lying to you for a week now and i don’t deserve to be here. "i don't wanna wake you up when i leave in the morning."

yoongi hummed. "okay."

one more kiss and jeongguk was out of the door. his heart stayed behind though. the whole thing was eating him alive. he didn't like lying to yoongi, not after everything the older had done for him, not after everything they'd already been through. but this was just something he would have to handle by himself. he didn't want to drag yoongi into all the ugliness from his past. and he knew haneul. he knew what the alpha was capable of. and jeongguk was ready to do whatever it took to keep him away from yoongi and the others. 

***

“okay, it’s intervention time.”

“what?” yoongi looked up from the black screen of his phone. no new messages, calls, nothing. he wasn’t surprised.

seokjin marched to the living room, holding a tray of drinks that he slid on the coffee table rather aggressively. “i know you don’t wanna say anything to him, but this is getting ridiculous. you heard the phone call. you know he’s in trouble. we all do. so why don’t you just confront him about it? jeongguk is too stubborn to come to any of us for help, i guess we can safely say that by now.”

the others were nodding along with the beta’s words. 

yoongi sighed. “i wanted for him to come to me. i’ve told him countless times that he can always talk to me. it just— i don’t get it? why doesn’t he feel safe to do that with me? why is he lying?”

jin hummed and sat down beside his friend. he knew it made the alpha uncomfortable, laying his feelings out in the open and it said a lot that he was doing it now. it meant that this was really bothering him, to the point where he didn’t care about appearances. of course they all knew that their big, tough alpha was actually really soft and insecure under all the grumpiness and eye rolling. and the fact didn’t make yoongi any weaker in their eyes. on the contrary.

“i don’t think it’s about whether he feels safe with you or not,” jin started, his tone a little calmer now, his words chosen more carefully. “he’s come a long way from the kid that walked into the bar months ago. he’s more open, happier, has his life somewhat together. and i don’t think he would’ve done that if it wasn’t for you.”

"he was overlooked and dismissed for so long, it’s so easy to slip back to the mindset he’s had back then,” namjoon chimed in from the other side of the room. “don’t blame yourself.”

“he does feel safe with you,” tae hopped over and snuggled beside yoongi. “i know that. but he doesn’t feel safe with himself. i think that’s the problem here.”

“i guess so,” yoongi smiled, a hint of sadness in his expression. “i'm gonna talk to him.”

***

jeongguk was tired. so, so tired. his back ached, his head hurt and somewhere behind the rhythmic pounding he knew that he was supposed to text yoongi, to inform him that he wouldn't be coming today, but his brain was filled only with the primal needs that told him to get home, get something to eat and then sleep until he’d have to wake up tomorrow to do it all over again. 

the universe had different plans for his night.

“what now?” jeongguk grumbled when he saw the familiar figure leaning against the wall next to his front door.

his brother just hummed, twirling an unlit cigarette in his right hand. “want one?”

“i don’t smoke.” jeongguk brushed past him to open the door. he marched inside and started climbing the stairs to his floor. jeonhyun followed after him. 

this exchange was starting to get old. jeongguk had found jeonhyun at the same spot almost every other day since the phone call last week. it was just like haneul to send his minions to keep his ‘business partners’ in check. jeongguk should’ve known that whenever haneul could, he would make his life even more of a living hell than it already was. it wasn’t like jeongguk had anywhere to run. and haneul knew that.he was just harassing jeongguk for his own amusement.

“are we really gonna do this again?” he threw his keys on the little table by the door and kicked his shoes off, not bothering to place them neatly to the side. on most days, he hadn’t paid any mind to his brother showing up, but today he was practically dead on his feet and he just wanted to get this over with so he could dive into his bed and escape the reality for even a few short hours before dawn.

“i mean, yeah. until you’ve paid off your debt to haneul.” jeonhyun spoke like he would to a child. like jeongguk was just being a little slow and he should already know all this. “how’s that going, by the way?”

“same as it was two days ago,” jeongguk mumbled and made his way to the kitchen.

“being uncooperative doesn’t get you anywhere. you know that,” jeonhyun rolled his eyes, leaning on the door frame. “look, the sooner you figure out how to get the money, the sooner i’ll be gone. simple as that.”

jeongguk twirled around. he’d been patient, so so patient during this past week. jeonhyun had stopped by to make sure jeongguk hadn’t bolted his ass out of the country and then he’d left after a few minutes of snappy remarks and condescending commentary. but today, the alpha didn’t seem to be in such a hurry to leave and today jeongguk was running out of patience..

“why are you doing this?” he growled, nails digging into the wooden surface of the kitchen counter. “why are you here? why are you working with haneul? what happened?”

jeonhyun didn’t seem fazed at all. he just shrugged. “haneul was the only one who was there. after you abandoned me.”

“abandoned you?” jeongguk’s eyed widened. he wanted to laugh at that, but the situation was far from humorous. “you were the golden boy, dad adores you! you got everything you wanted, all the attention, the approval, the love. which one of those is something you didn’t want?”

“you forget that i was never supposed to be that. i was second to you, all my life and then suddenly, the fucking mantle was thrown at my face and i had no choice. suddenly i had no say about my own life.” jeonhyun was quickly losing his cool and his words got heated, his scent more prominent in the air. “you have no idea how that feels like.”

jeongguk refused to cower in front of his own brother, no matter what tricks the alpha tried to pull. “oh, poor pup, was dad giving you too much money? it must’ve been awful, being so loved you couldn’t take it anymore.”

“fuck you,” jeonhyun growled. “why am i even talking to you? just get him the money.” 

jeongguk watched as his brother turned around to stomp his way out of the apartment. he was tired, his brain wasn’t really cooperating and by now he’d lost the last shreds of any filters he had.

“are you really that dumb that you can’t see he’s just using you?”

he should’ve just kept his mouth shut. 

jeonhyun snarled and whirled around. little brother or not, he was still an alpha. jeongguk didn’t have time to do anything else than cover his face when his brother slammed into him, the two of them tumbling to the floor. 

jeonhyun’s eyes were burning bright red, his nails digging into jeongguk’s skin on his shoulders. the air around them was thick, hard to breath, his lungs burning with the aggressive, spicy scent of his brother. 

“you have some nerve talking to me like that after everything you’ve done,” the alpha growled, his face inches away from jeongguk’s. “you destroyed our family. my family. you have no idea what i’ve been through. so keep your mouth shut and do as you’re told.”

jeongguk blinked at the words, confused. he had no time to reply when his brother pushed himself away from him, his claws pressing deep into jeongguk’s skin. he wanted to scream, tears were welling up in his eyes, but he didn’t want to give jeonhyun the satisfaction. so he stayed still, not making a single sound, eyes shut tight. 

“one week.” jeonhyun’s voice came from somewhere above him. “you don’t wanna find out what happens if you don’t have the money by then.”

a few steps and then the door was slammed shut. jeongguk knew he should get up, clean up his wounds, do something, anything. but he was so tired. tired of everything. of this situation he was in yet again. of this life.

so he just laid still and waited for sleep to come and take him away. he would deal with it all tomorrow. 

***

time. a tricky concept. sometimes it seemed like not even minutes have passed and in reality it's been two hours. and sometimes it felt like the clock couldn't tick fast enough. today yoongi felt like the latter. he'd been at work for half a shift already and jin had asked him to stay overtime, so six hours to go. it wasn't that yoongi was bored or had nothing to do, quite on the contrary, it was just one of those days when he caught himself staring at the clock more often than usually.

he hadn't heard back from jeongguk properly in days, just a few short texts and he was getting really tired. space was one thing, but this, this was not normal. namjoon had called him yesterday, saying that he tried to talk to the youngest, but got next to nothing out of him. not that yoongi’d had high expectations from that to begin with. he had decided that today, no matter how late he got off work, he'd go straight to jeongguk's and demand some answers. the younger would surely get mad when he would find out that yoongi had been eavesdropping on his phone call, but that was the least of yoongi's worries right now.

he was so lost in thought he didn't notice the man sitting down at the stool right in front of him before he opened his mouth.

"ahh, min yoongi, long time no see."

yoongi raised his head from the drinks he was making and was met with very familiar, very unwanted pair of dark brown eyes. the alpha's scent was the kind that took over the whole room wherever he went, dark, musky, overpowering, just one other thing to add to the list why yoongi didn't like this man.

"what are you doing here?" he grumbled and tried to ignore the glare he received from jimin, who was tending to some customers on the other end of the bar. customer service wasn’t really the first concern on yoongi’s mind right now. not when dealing with this guy.

the alpha smirked at him and didn’t seem to pay no attention to his darkened tone. "heard good things about this place, thought i’d check it out." 

yoongi wasn’t fooled so easily. "last time i heard, you were in jail?"

the alpha grinned, all too cheerful for yoongi's liking. "got out a few weeks back." he tapped his fingers against the counter top, surely expecting to be offered a drink.

"i see." yoongi could feel jimin’s gaze burning a hole on his side so reluctantly he grabbed a coaster and the first bottle he got his hands on. 

"so, how you've been?" 

chit chat? really? yoongi watched as the alpha took a sip of his beer, perfectly calm and collected. his nonchalance made yoongi even more annoyed. 

"same as ever." he collected the empty glasses left on the side of the bar, desperately trying to find something to do with his hands. just a moment ago there had been a line of customers, where were they now when he needed a distraction? he glanced at his left. jimin. one of the things yoongi usually liked about sharing the same shift with him. the omega was undeniably very attractive and naturally, jimin’s side of the bar was always filled with googly-eyed young alphas trying to get his attention. less socializing for yoongi, more hearts to break for jimin. they were a good match like that.

right now yoongi would trade dealing with this one man to a hundred other customers.   

the man in question eyed him, smug smirk ever present on his lips, one that yoongi would very much like to punch away. not like he hadn’t done that before. "now, i wouldn't say that,” the alpha tutted at him and yoongi’s blood started to boil. “you've got a whole new thing going on, i see. honest working man, your sister nowhere to be found. wonder what happened?"

yoongi tried his best to keep the growl out of his voice. he didn’t want to scare the other customers. "nothing happened.” he aimed for a disinterested tone and proceeded to wipe down the counter. “got tired of that life. guess we all gotta grow up sometime."

the alpha chuckled. "grow up, run away, there's many expressions for it i think."

okay, enough of this. "what do you want?" yoongi threw the dirty rag in the bin and crossed his arms, glaring at the other over the bar.

"another drink would be nice." he had some nerve playing all innocent.

“drop the act.” yoongi didn’t care about containing his annoyance anymore and a growl escaped his lips. "you know what i mean."

the alpha finished his beer and then tilted his head, his brow furrowing. "i really don’t. this looked like a good place for a few cold beers after a long day’s work. i had no idea you worked at this fine establishment."

"right."

yoongi was just about to turn around and find something, anything else to do so he wouldn’t have to continue this conversation. the door jingled and a few new customers walked in. along with them came a slight breeze that carried over to the counter. and suddenly yoongi felt like his insides were on fire.

he snapped his gaze up and stared straight at the alpha in front of him, eyes blazing red. 

along with the breeze he’d caught the familiar scent of citrus under the alpha’s own strong musk. and even slighter, but still very much detectable with yoongi’s sharp senses, was the coppery smell of blood. 

yoongi had only one word in his mind before his instincts completely took over.

jeongguk.

Chapter Text

twenty-four hours earlier 

“gguk? are you here?”

jeongguk raised his head up from where it was buried in his sketchbook. namjoon walked to the doorway of the breakroom, smiling, his steps cautious, like he was approaching a small, scared animal. jeongguk hadn’t seen that look in months. it reminded him of how yoongi used to look at him.

“yeah?”

the beta sighed and sat down on the couch beside him. “i’ve actually been meaning to talk to you.”

jeongguk bit his bottom lip. he knew what was coming. “what about?”

“you’ve been working like crazy. that on itself isn’t a bad thing, but i’m worried. we all are.” 

there it was again. jeongguk hated that look, filled with worry and hesitance, a look he’d been receiving from his friends a lot lately.

“i’m fine,” he said firmly, trying to sound as assuring as he could. 

namjoon eyed him, suspicious. jeongguk had come to realize he wasn’t as great of an actor as he thought. “look, if there’s something bothering you, you can always talk to me. about anything.”

“i know.” jeongguk flipped his sketchbook closed and flashed a smile at the beta. “i really am fine. i just wanna make some extra money. why is that so hard for everyone to understand?”

“gguk—”

“no. this is getting kinda old.” jeongguk got up from the couch and swiped his hands over his thighs, like sweeping off imaginary dust. “look, i’ve never had anything of my own. and now that i do, i wanna protect it. i wanna make my financial situation stable. that means i’ll be working extra for a few weeks. i don’t know why you all are getting so alarmed about this.” he had this little voice inside his head that most likely belonged to his omega, that was screaming at him to just tell the truth, to stop lying and ask for help. but jeongguk had made his decision.

“we don’t mean anything bad by this, you know.” namjoon leaned forward, placing his elbows on his knees, looking so tired jeongguk immediately felt even more guilt gnawing at his conscience. “i can’t say i know what it feels like, but i can understand where you’re coming from.” 

“thank you.” jeongguk smiled again, trying his best to remain calm. “is that all?”

“just, take care of yourself. you won’t be doing anyone no good if you burn yourself out. it’ll only hurt you and the people around you.”

“i know. and i will.”

lies lies lies lies. jeongguk felt like his wolf had its tail between its legs permanently by now. it didn’t like lying to his friends any better than jeongguk. it was easier, hiding his emotions with the betas, but yoongi, jimin and tae were dangerous company for him right now. jeongguk hadn’t meant to start avoiding them, but it became inevitable when they’d started to worry and question his sudden workaholism. that was just what he’d been trying to avoid, making them worried and anxious for him. 

no going back now. he’d just have to ride this out. and then when it would all be over, he’d figure out a way to make this up to them. to yoongi. 

“one more thing,” namjoon raised his head up. “take the rest of the day off. you have no more clients today, only one consultation and tae can handle it.”

jeongguk hesitated. “but—”

“for me.” namjoon had this tone he used very rarely, but when he did, everyone knew there was no talking back to him.

“fine,” jeongguk sighed. he smiled and thanked his friend and for the first time during this conversation, he was genuine with his words.

***

“thought i wouldn’t see you so soon after last time,” jeongguk mumbled when he spotted the dark figure standing next to his door. he’d enjoyed his day off so far, the first one in two weeks. namjoon had called him this morning, saying that all of his clients for the day had cancelled, but he would still get paid full. jeongguk knew full well that the beta was lying, but he didn’t have it in him to fight back. one day. just for himself. he’d deserved that. but he sensed that the peaceful day he’d had was now about to take quite a different direction.

the voice that came from the dark wasn’t his brother’s. “thought right.” haneul stepped into the light shining from the street lamps. 

“what are you doing here?” jeongguk had no energy to be surprised anymore. if he’d been paying more attention, he would’ve been able to tell it was him from his scent, but he was still rusty, especially now that he was constantly tired from work. how was he supposed to find the time to practise his senses when he barely had enough time to sleep more than four hours at night?

“i’ve been really patient with you.” the alpha just stood there, arms crossed at his chest, looking down at jeongguk. “but it’s taking too long. you clearly can’t get the money by yourself. so you’ll pay with work.”

“i’m not gonna work for you,” jeongguk puffed out and turned to open the door. 

his face was slammed on it instead. “don’t you turn your back to me,” haneul growled in his ear. “you seem to have forgotten who’s in charge here.” then he pushed back, giving jeongguk room to move again. “let’s take a walk, shall we.” 

the last thing jeongguk wanted to do was to allow this alpha into his home, so he was relieved. they started walking down the street, toward the little alleyways not so far from jeongguk’s building. he didn’t live in the safest of neighborhoods, but that hadn’t bothered jeongguk before. now, in this kind of company, he started to get a little anxious. to think that if something should happen, no one would see, or care if they did, made his heart beat a little faster.

“getting scared, omega?” haneul was laughing at him. jeongguk cursed at his inability to hide his emotions. it meant that haneul would have the upper hand here and no matter what jeongguk said or did, his scent would always betray him to the alpha. 

he ignored the mockery and tried to get ahold of his inner wolf. “i’ll get you the money. jeonhyun said one week. i’ll do it.” jeongguk was starting to get more annoyed the longer they walked. they had an agreement. he didn’t understand why haneul was here, why now, when he’d been sending jeonhyun to check up on him every other time.

haneul looked at him sideways, amusement in his eyes. “that’s not enough anymore.”

realization dawned on jeongguk and his blood ran cold. “this was never about the money. you just wanted revenge.” he stopped in his tracks, eyeing his surroundings. they’d wandered into a narrow passageway between two tall brick-walled buildings. no one around, not even windows facing the alley. jeongguk gulped. 

“i thought you’d never get there.” haneul stopped a few steps ahead of him and turned around, a sickening smirk on his lips. “of course, you need to pay back what you owe to us. but you’re right, there is more in it for me. why did you think i would be wasting my time on a matter this small if it wasn’t personal?”

jeongguk started backing away, his omega snarling at the alpha inside his chest. he was pretty surprised at his wolf’s reaction. just a few years ago it would’ve been cowering down, submitting to the alpha at the first show of dominance. guess he wasn’t the only one who’d grown up a little. but now wasn’t the time to fight back, not here. jeongguk tried to take deep breaths to calm himself. the air was getting thick despite them being outside, he just wasn’t sure anymore if all the emotions in the air were coming from the alpha or himself. 

suddenly, haneul lunged at him, grabbing his shirt, his face so close that jeongguk could feel his breath on his face. “i was on my way to the top.” haneul’s low rumble crept along his spine, making him curl in on himself. “but now, how can i ever get people to follow and respect me again when all they know is that i got thrown into jail by some bitchass whiny little omega?” haneul grabbed his arm and started dragging him deeper into the alley. “i don’t know why’d you think that i’d let that slide.”

jeongguk pushed back, trying to get the alpha to let go of him, but he was powerless compared to the other. he didn’t have many options left and he wasn’t about to just give up and follow the alpha to wherever he was leading them. so he let his omega take control. maybe not the wisest of decisions. his eyes flashed blue for a moment and somehow, he found himself ripping his arm away from the alpha’s grip. “you brought this on yourself. what kind of an alpha blames an omega for their own mistakes?” 

next thing he knew, he was thrown on the ground, hard. he tried to scramble back to his feet, but the two kicks on his stomach and side he received next prevented that pretty effectively.

“i would advice you not to talk back to me,” haneul growled and pressed his foot on jeongguk’s chest, turning him to lie on his back. “jeonhyun warned you about that already.”

jeongguk got flashbacks from the night a few days ago, when his brother had jumped him and left his skin scratched and bleeding. but this time, he didn’t regret opening his mouth. he wasn’t just gonna take this without fighting back, not anymore. he was done feeling helpless. yes, he was an omega and naturally designed to submit and back away from conflict, but that didn’t mean he was incapable of defending himself.

he swiped at haneul’s leg that was still pressed on his chest, throwing it away and making the alpha stagger to the side. “i don’t see how this could get any worse. if you want the money—” he paused to cough, his lungs fighting to get air in between the flashes of pain on his side. “—you can’t exactly get rid of me.” he sat up, his muscles throbbing and shaking, but he refused to appear weak in front of the alpha.

haneul leaned down and grabbed his throat. “what makes you think that is the only way to make this worse for you?” he dragged jeongguk up from the ground. “you forget that i know you. pretty well, might i add.”

jeongguk staggered back when the alpha loosened his grip on him. “what?” he huffed out, bent down from his waist, gasping, trying to get his lungs to cooperate. his eyes were starting to get blurry, white spots dancing on the edges of his vision. he glanced up at the alpha.

haneul smirked. jeongguk didn’t like that look. “i think i need a beer. it’s been a long day.”

haneul was right. there had been a time when jeongguk had trusted the alpha more than anyone else. trusted him with all his secrets, he’d given him everything he’d had to give.

and now he was paying the price for trusting the wrong people. he was fine with that, but he couldn’t let his friends pay for him. 

haneul had already turned around and was about to walk away. jeongguk’s eyes were now completely taken over by the bright blue of his omega, his senses heightened, his pain giving way to the pure hatred running through his veins. 

he jumped on the alpha’s back with a furious growl, blinded by the rage he felt for the other. but haneul was still stronger than him and didn’t fall down, just lost his balance. jeongguk was thrown on the ground again, his head bashed against the cold, hard concrete and his mind blacked out for a while. 

“stupid, silly little omega,” he heard haneul growling above him. “did you really think that would work?” 

jeongguk tasted the awful copper of blood in his mouth and turned sideways to cough and spit it out. he saw haneul backing away from his peripheral vision, but he had no energy left to get up anymore.

he couldn’t just stay there. couldn’t give up. he had to find a way to warn his friends, somehow. 

he started crawling his way away from the alley. 

***

“yoongi!” 

he heard people shouting his name, but he couldn’t recognize their voices. all he saw was red. a loud rumble filled his ears. it took him a long while to figure out the sound was coming from him. all he knew was that the alpha in front of him had hurt jeongguk. he didn’t know how, or why, but he didn’t really care. he jumped over the counter and lashed out, blindly. the fresh smell of blood filled his senses. he was determined to end this alpha for hurting the one he cared about the most.

jeongguk.

hands grasped at him from behind and pulled him back. he snarled and tried to get away, but the grip was firm, sure on his sides. he could feel the other’s body slip from his fingertips. desperate, he tried to get a grip on something, anything, but all he could get his hands on was air.

he was dragged away and pushed down onto something soft. 

a slap on his face. “ stop it!”

his senses were filled with flowers. fresh, blooming scent, filled with concern and worry.

jimin.

yoongi was starting to get back to himself. he felt his conscious bubbling up again, his mind clearing. 

he shook his head and glanced around. he was sitting on the leather couch in the breakroom. jimin stood before him, arms crossed, his eyes filled with worry and a flash of irritation.

“what’s going on?” jimin’s lips were drawn thin, his jaw tightened.

yoongi dropped his head on his hands, leaning forward on the couch, trying to get his brain working again. “jeongguk’s hurt,” he mumbled to his palms. 

“what?” now jimin sounded alarmed, his scent spiking up. 

yoongi felt sick to his stomach. “i smelled jeongguk’s blood on him. i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to cause a scene. my alpha just took over.”

jimin sat down beside him, snuggling his way into his arms. “it’s okay,” he whispered. “jin cleared the place after you jumped him. not that people were really eager to stay here anyway.”

haneul. “where is he?” yoongi growled. even the mention of the alpha got his blood boiling again. he tried to stand up, but jimin had a firm grip on his arm and kept him from storming off.

“still out there, i think,” jimin tried to calm him. “jin stayed with him.”

“jeongguk.” yoongi’s mind was fixated on one thing, but who could blame him? “he’s hurt. i need to get out there, i need to find out what happened.”

jimin hummed, but didn’t let go of his arm. “i’m worried about him too, but you’re not going back out there before you calm down. that’ll do no one no good.” he dragged yoongi back by his shoulder. “who is he?”

yoongi leaned his head on the back of the couch and sighed, trying to get his heart rate to go down. “a man i used to know. works for my sister.” 

jimin glared at him. “i feel like there’s more to this story.”

yoongi rolled his eyes, but continued, “so, my sister yona. she doesn’t really go by the law. mostly drugs, illegal meds. i used to work with her and later for her. before i met any of you. i got out when i left for college and met joon and jin.” he raised his hand to massage his temple, his head hurting from the flashes of emotions and the inner battle with his alpha, who was going crazy inside of him, only out for blood. “that alpha, he— we used to be friends. as i began to realize that was not what i wanted, not what i wanted to be, he got even more immersed into it. the power. but i haven’t seen him in years. i don’t know what he wants, what’s the connection between him and jeongguk, for all i know, he might be here just to taunt me, that would be just like him.”

jimin just stared at him. yoongi didn’t blame him for getting caught off guard, this was something he’d never revealed to the newer additions of their friend group. he was ashamed of his past, still, after all these years, the guilt hasn’t subsided.

jimin took a deep breath. “hyung, this—”

“i’m going back out there,” yoongi cut him short. this was not the time. “i’m calm, i promise. i need to know where jeongguk is.” 

he didn’t wait for an answer, just got up and marched through the swing door. he glanced around, looking for the alpha, but the only other person left in the bar was seokjin, sitting at one of the booths, alone. yoongi made his way to the beta, his eyes blazing, about to lose the battle with his alpha all over again at the realization that haneul had slipped through his fingers yet again. he could sense jimin trailing after him, but he paid the omega no attention, only focused on one thing. 

“where is he?” 

jin raised his head and looked at him, tired. “he left. i tried to stop him, but—”

yoongi swatted at him, not wanting to waste any more time. “yeah, okay. did he say where he was going?”

“no.” jin took a deep breath and eyed yoongi, cautious. “but jeongguk tried to call me. earlier, like an hour ago? he’s not answering now, i tried to call him back.”

“could’ve lead with that,” yoongi grumbled while turning on his heels and rushing to the door. jin and jimin both called after him, but he didn’t stop to listen. 

***

jeongguk heard the doorbell ringing. and then it rang again. and again. it sounded like the person standing on the other side would come through the door if he wouldn’t open, so he gathered all the strength he had left and made his way to the door, leaning on the wall for support. 

he couldn’t get a word out before he was tackled to the floor. he hissed, the bruising on his side still fresh and pounding, but jeongguk quickly forgot all about it when he got a lungful of green, fresh pine, a scent so thick with worry and anger he almost choked on it.

“idiot,” yoongi growled and kissed him straight on the mouth with no grace, all teeth and uncoordinated desperation. “you stupid, thick-headed, stubborn idiot .” every word was cut off with a new peck on his lips. 

“i’m getting a lot of mixed signals here,” jeongguk got out when yoongi was finally done and just holding his face in between his palms. 

“shut up,” yoongi whispered, his voice cracking. “what happened? why didn’t you call me?”

jeongguk’s heart ached at the hurt so visible in yoongi’s eyes. “i’m sorry,” he whispered, his voice as broken as the other’s. “i’m so sorry hyung. i messed up. big time. i should've told you sooner.”

“about haneul?”

jeongguk’s eyes flew wide open and he stared at the alpha in shock. how did he knew?

yoongi smiled at him, a gentle, sad little twitch on his lips. “he stopped by the bar. i knew you were hurt the second i caught his scent. just didn’t get the details before he left.”

“you know him?” jeongguk’s mind was playing everything back so fast he couldn’t keep up with his own thoughts.

yoongi nodded. “unfortunately, yeah.”

jeongguk flinched. “hyung, what’s going on?”

yoongi didn’t stop him from crawling away. he stood up and let jeongguk get up too, trying to extend his arm to help him, but giving up when jeongguk staggered back from him, eyes wide. “i gotta tell you something. about my past. and yona.”

“okay.” jeongguk would’ve lied if he’d said he wasn’t afraid of what was about to come out of the older’s mouth. he’d never had any reason to be afraid of yoongi, he’d always felt safe with him, even back when he was afraid of everything, most of all himself. now he wasn’t so sure anymore, but he owed the alpha the benefit of the doubt. “go on.”

yoongi was looking at him, his eyes glossed over, his posture slumped, like all energy had left his body. “i don’t blame you for being afraid. i know haneul. i can’t even imagine what he’s done. but i need to know, how do you know him? what’s going on?”

“he’s the ex,” jeongguk whispered. his omega was whining, confused. this was their alpha. their sweet, soft, protective, strong and kind alpha. how was he associated with haneul? had it all been just a lie? was yoongi in on this all?

yoongi’s eyes cleared and flashed bright red. his hands were drawn to fists at his sides. jeongguk eyed him, watchful, hands pressed at his stomach, trying to ignore the throbbing pain. 

“i had no idea,” yoongi stated calmly, his tone in a harsh contradiction to the stiffness in his body. “if i’d known, i would’ve done something sooner. i do know him, yes, but it was a long time ago. i haven’t seen him in years, not before today.”

jeongguk still wasn’t ready to relax. “okay.”

yoongi sighed. jeongguk could sense it in the air, the conflict, flashes of emotions from the alpha’s scent. “he works for my sister. i used to as well. that’s how i know him. but as i told you, i got out. i left.”

“why?” jeongguk whispered, tears welling in his eyes. he didn’t want to cry, he hated showing his weakness, but all the things that had happened in these past twenty-four hours were catching up with him and he was just so done , so tired that he couldn’t keep all the emotions inside for much longer. 

“at first, it was just odd jobs here and there. i’m not from this town, so i didn’t exactly work with haneul, not at the start, but i knew of him and we met, sometimes. then we moved closer and yona started pairing me up with him.” yoongi slid down to sit on the floor, hanging his head low, eyes closed. “i didn’t know anything about him, we weren’t that close. that’s why i couldn’t make the connection when you told me about your ex. but i should’ve paid more attention. i knew he got locked up some time ago. but that’s pretty common in those kind of circles and i—”

“it’s okay,” jeongguk interrupted. he walked toward the alpha and sat down in front of him, still maintaining a little extra space between them. “just, continue.”

yoongi glanced at him, but didn’t make a move to get any closer. “the jobs started getting worse after that. we were sent to intimidate people, to collect debts, to scare them into compliance. i hated that.” yoongi took a deep breath. he seemed more serene now, but it was somehow still twisted, like the eerie calm before a thundering storm. “then came this one job. i’d already decided i wanted out. that this was the last one. i went with haneul to this one beta’s house. we were supposed to intimidate him, maybe trash his car, the usual. but he fought back.”

jeongguk didn’t like where this was going.

“it all happened in slow motion after the gun went off. it sounded so surreal, not at all like it does in the movies, like it was fake, nothing more than a car backfiring. i turned to haneul and saw him holding the weapon in his hand, completely frozen still. i expected to see his eyes blazing red, to smell the aggression, the adrenaline in his scent.” yoongi raised his head and looked straight into jeongguk’s eyes. he had tears streaming down his face. “but there was nothing. he was so calm. how could someone do something like that and not feel anything ? i ran to the beta, i tried to stop the bleeding but i had no idea what the hell i was supposed to do. and haneul, even after i started shouting at him to go get help, he did nothing. like it didn’t matter to him.”

yoongi paused when his words started to get a little shaky and took another deep breath. “i wanted to cry, to scream, to do something . i felt so powerless. i’ve never been so scared in my life. except today.”

jeongguk crawled closer, his heart breaking at the sight of his alpha so broken, so vulnerable, wounded. “i’m so sorry, you don’t have to tell me, i’m sorry—”

“no, you need to hear this.” yoongi sniffed and opened his arms, allowing jeongguk to climb into his lap. he nuzzled at his scent gland, seeking comfort, and jeongguk responded to the silent plea immediately, comforting pheromones filling the air around them. “i know him, i know what he’s capable of doing and after i smelled your blood on him, i just— ”

“i’m here,” jeongguk mumbled into yoongi’s skin. “i’m okay.”

“yeah,” the alpha whispered, breathless, and wrapped his arms around jeongguk’s middle, tight, like making sure he really was there. 

jeongguk could feel his heart cracking, breaking for yoongi, for everything he’d been through, everything jeongguk would've never known and never would've guessed. he was still hurt, his whole body aching, his lungs still struggling to breathe, but all of that was forgotten at that moment. he was here, he was in yoongi’s arms and he was safe . and he wanted to make his alpha feel safe too.

“what happened after that?” jeongguk’s voice was almost inaudible. he wasn’t sure if he wanted to know, but he knew he needed to. and yoongi needed to tell him. 

the alpha huffed and pressed his lips against jeongguk’s hairline, his tone hushed. “he didn’t die. haneul was a lousy shot, thank goodness. but we got caught. we were both young so we were judged as minors, but i think he still got off too easily. just six months in juvie. for the both of us. after i got out, i decided i’d had enough. of haneul, of yona, of everything. that wasn’t the life that i wanted. that wasn’t the kind of person i wanted to be.”

“and it’s not. you’re nothing like that.” jeongguk raised his head from yoongi’s chest and placed a soft kiss on his tear stained cheek and another on his quivering lips. “i’m sorry. i’m so sorry you had to go through it all, alone. and to think your own sister put you in that position. i can’t imagine how that must’ve felt like.”

“it’s in the past now. and i’m grateful for that. i owe everything to jin and joon, really. they got me where i am now.” yoongi carded his fingers through jeongguk’s hair, gently. “family consists of the people you would bleed for, not of the people you share the same bloodline with. and i would never bleed for yona. ever again.”

jeongguk glanced up and saw yoongi looking down at him, his teary eyes soft, so painfully soft and his scent full of emotions so strong jeongguk felt like drowning. he didn't mind. 

yoongi placed a kiss on his forehead. “i would bleed for you.” 

Chapter Text

“you’re pretty good at this.”

yoongi glanced up, finding it hard to get his gaze off of the younger’s wounded body. luckily there had been no broken ribs but still, yoongi had wanted to drag him straight to the hospital, just to be sure. jeongguk had resisted, and at some point they’d been just glaring at each other from opposite sides of the living room. yoongi had been the one to give up first. his alpha didn’t like it, but jeongguk was weird when it came to hospitals. though  that was a topic for a different day.

he’d managed to get jeongguk to lay down on the couch so yoongi could check him for any damages the younger could’ve missed himself. his alpha flared up every now and then, furious at the sight of their wounded baby. but yoongi held it in, he didn’t want to lose his head for the third time today. jimin had been right, that would do no one no good.

“had a lot of practise.” yoongi smiled, a little forced. jeongguk was trying to brush it off as a joke, but yoongi knew that he was really hurt. physically, that was obvious, but emotionally too. yoongi suspected that it would take a long time to get jeongguk to open up about it, but yoongi was willing to wait. he’d only been given the rough explanation, purely factual, not even a peek into the younger’s head, to his emotions. yoongi didn’t blame him. being openly vulnerable in front of people wasn’t one of his strengths either and considering the trauma, the history jeongguk already had with haneul, the alpha in question, it was no surprise he was putting some of the walls back up. yoongi would just have to carefully break them down again. brick by brick.

“hyung, i’m sorry,” jeongguk mumbled, pulling his shirt back down and sitting up, wincing when his core muscles disagreed with the motion.

yoongi was quick to wrap his hands behind the younger’s back and lift him up, minimizing the stress for his body. “you don’t have to apologize. you did nothing wrong.”

“but i did.” jeongguk bit his bottom lip and yoongi reminded him of that habit by swiping his thumb over the curve of his jaw.

he leaned forward to place a soft kiss on the younger’s bruised cheekbone, now much more careful with his touches after he’d realized how badly jeongguk was hurt. he regretted storming in like that before, cursing silently at himself and his wildfire of an alpha. what if jeongguk had been seriously hurt? what if his ribs had been broken? yoongi would’ve made it so much worse tumbling in like that. he would’ve never been able to forgive himself. 

jeongguk woke him up from his thoughts by nudging his nose to yoongi’s temple, careful, a little ashamed. yoongi didn’t like those emotions and wanted to wipe the younger’s scent clean of them, as soon as possible. as much as he tried to keep it in and stay calm, his alpha was strong and a little shocked after everything that had happened. he couldn’t help it, his instincts were still screaming at him to protect , even when he knew that jeongguk was now perfectly safe and sound in his arms. 

“yes, i agree that you should’ve told me sooner. but i understand why you didn’t.” yoongi pressed his lips on jeongguk’s shoulder, burying his face into his neck, brushing his nose over his scent gland, trying to overpower the anxiety with comfort. “next time, if you’re ever in trouble, just know that you can come to me. i need you to come to me. it doesn’t make you weak. it doesn’t make me love you any less. i want you to be safe. that’s all i’d ever want.”

jeongguk sniffed and yoongi’s head flew back up, his scent flaring with alarm. but the younger was smiling, his eyes teary, but sparkling.

“what?” yoongi searched jeongguk’s eyes for an answer.

“i’m just—” jeongguk wiped at his cheek with the sleeve of his sweater. “i love you too, hyung.”

yoongi’s eyes widened when he realized that in fact, this was the first time he’s ever said it. it had been implied before, because that’s simply how he felt, but he hadn’t really said it out loud like that before. “gguk-ah, baby. i love you so much you don’t even know.” he leaned forward again and pressed his lips gently against the other’s. jeongguk tasted a little bittersweet, the saltiness of his tears mixing up with his natural sugary lemon, but yoongi didn’t care, just kissed him that much harder. he was in love. with all of his heart.

later that night they were laying together in jeongguk’s bed, side by side, yoongi being extra careful with jeongguk’s bruised body and keeping the younger on his side, tucked safely in the alpha’s arms. jeongguk was pressing kisses on yoongi’s neck, nuzzling his scent gland every once in a while, like it was completely natural for him, an afterthought. yoongi was happy. jeongguk had come a long way in these past few months. yoongi’s alpha was over the moon to be able to make the younger so happy, content, feeling safe and comfortable with him. he knew it wasn’t over, they weren’t in the clear yet and he still had to figure out a way to fix it, with haneul and inevitably, with his sister. but at that moment, yoongi was happy. they were here, together, in love and yoongi would do anything in his power to make sure it stayed that way.

***

“i’ve been waiting for your call, little brother.”

that was kind of hard to believe, since yoongi had tried to get a hold of his sister the whole morning. he had no patience left for small talk. “did you know?”

“what?”

“when you came by? did you know who he was?”

“i really have no idea what you’re talking about.” she really sounded genuinely surprised. but yoongi wasn’t fooled that easily. he knew his sister and she happened to be a great actor.

“don’t play dumb. i already know you came back here just because you wanted me to come to work for you again. but did you really think blackmailing my boyfriend and sending people to beat him up would help with that?”

yona sighed on the other end. “i would never admit this to anyone else, but believe me when i say that i had nothing to do with the latter. haneul, the idiot, acted completely on his own. and he’s not gonna get away with that.” she paused and fell silent for a moment.

yoongi didn’t give in to it. yona seemed casual and carefree, but in reality, every word she ever said, every move she ever made was carefully calculated and planned in advance. his sister was really good at making people feel comfortable around her. comfortable enough to let their guard down and make mistakes. he wasn’t gonna fall for that. “and?”

“ahh. you know me so well, brother.” yona had the audacity to laugh. yoongi growled. “okay, yeah. i came here to try to convince you to come back. i had no idea you even had a boyfriend, but yes, i realized who he was during our little introduction at breakfast. you know how these things work. i can’t really make an exception. not even for you.”

“that’s what i thought.” yoongi wasn’t that surprised. yona was right, he knew how this world worked. “and that’s why i’m offering you a deal instead.”

yona hummed. “i’m listening.”

“you let jeongguk off the hook. and i’ll come work for you.” yoongi heard the sharp intake of breath from the other end of the line. he smiled to himself. that’s something yona hadn’t been expecting for sure. “there’s no reason why you wouldn’t agree to it. you get the money and you get me. that’s everything you wanted.”

yoongi didn’t expect for her to start laughing again. “you really are something else.” she calmed down a little, but her tone was still happy, cheerful. yoongi suspected it was just to rile him up. “say, brother, are you familiar with the expression ‘fatal flaw’?”

“i’m not here for a philosophy lesson. cut the crap, do we have a deal or not?” yoongi was starting to get annoyed.

“it means that one mistake, one characteristic, that ends up being the doom of an otherwise honorable man. my fatal flaw was letting you walk all those years ago.” yona’s tone was more serious now. her duality was truly amazing, something yoongi had once admired about her. “do you want to know what your fatal flaw is, little brother?”

“i don’t care, just get to the point.”

“your fatal flaw is doing stupid things for the people you love.” yoongi could hear the smile in his sister’s voice. “i don’t really care where the money comes from. if you really wanna do this, be my guest.”

“i do.” yoongi had made his decision long before this phone call.

“okay then.”

“are we done here?”

“you sound so surprised. why is that?”

“i beat the shit out of one of your men. aren’t you gonna say anything about that?”

“i’m not. i can understand why you did it.” yona’s tone was calm, soft, and for a moment, it reminded yoongi of the sister he’d once had. before all of this. “it’s perfectly reasonable for an alpha to want to protect their omega. haneul harmed him, you had your revenge. simple as that.”

she ended the call rather abruptly after that. yoongi was left staring at the device in his hand, a little dazed, a lot confused. it wasn’t like yona to let people walk that easily, especially if they’d done something to harm her, or her people. even if they’d had a reason. that’s not how that world worked.

yoongi had a feeling this matter was far from being over.

***

“i mean— what?”

seokjin and namjoon sat on the couch in front of yoongi and jeongguk, both of them sporting the exact same look on their faces, eyes a little widened, brows furrowed in confusion.

“so, let me get this straight,” namjoon massaged his temples, like his brain was really working overtime trying to make sense of the situation. yoongi didn’t blame him. “gguk has been harassed and blackmailed by his ex for weeks now? and this same guy is working for your sister?”

“sounds about right,” yoongi murmured.

“and jeongguk was trying to keep this from all of us? and then haneul beat him up and yoongi found out when the guy walked into the bar the other day?”

“mm-hmm,” jeongguk nodded.

“and now yoongi made a deal with his sister to pay off jeongguk’s debts by working for her?”

jeongguk mumbled something barely inaudible beside him, but yoongi paid it no mind. they’d been arguing about it all morning, the serenity from last night long gone, but yoongi knew jeongguk was just trying to protect him. ironic, since that was the exact reason yoongi had decided to do this. of course jeongguk wasn’t happy with him, but that was something they’d have to deal with at a later time.

seokjin flew up from the couch, shaking his head rather aggressively. “okay, enough with this.”

“what?” yoongi shrugged. “haneul was acting on his own. the order to collect the debt came from yona, yes, but she didn’t order the attack.” yoongi sighed. “i’ll still have to figure out what to do about haneul, but i think it’s good to start with my sister.” yoongi’s alpha was growling every time the other alpha’s name was mentioned. yoongi tried his best to ignore it. still, he moved a little closer to jeongguk, an instinct he had no problem with.

“yeah,” seokjin snorted. “i don’t really care whether she knew or not. this is ridiculous!” he marched to jeongguk and grabbed him by the shoulders. “gguk-ah, honey, never ever again are you getting yourself in that kind of situation and not tell us. promise me.”

jeongguk looked at jin with slightly widened eyes. “i promise.”

then jin walked to yoongi, arms crossed at his chest. “and you.”

yoongi rolled his eyes. “yeah?”

“don’t give me that.” seokjin sighed. “you’re not going back to that life. i get that you wanna protect jeongguk, but this is not the way.”

“i don’t like it any more than you do. i hate it, everything about it, about that world. but i hate seeing jeongguk hurt even more.”

“you’re being stupid.”

“and i suppose you have a better solution.”

“we’re going to the police,” namjoon chimed in from the couch. “we’re gonna go and tell them everything that’s going on. there’s no way they won’t help us.”

“and you think i haven’t thought of that?” yoongi huffed. “my sister ain’t that dumb. she’s been out there for years and the cops haven’t caught her. what makes you think the situation is any different now?”

“she trusts you.”

yoongi whipped his head to the side. jeongguk toed at the fluffy carpet and eyed him, careful, his bottom lip bitten raw.

“stop it.” yoongi walked to him and tugged his chin. “explain.”

jeongguk rolled his eyes but flashed him a tiny smile. “they haven’t caught yona before, because they had no proof. but she trusts you. you can get close to her. you could wear a wire? or whatever, i don’t really know about those kinda things, but i mean, that could work?”

“hmm,” yoongi tilted his head, a little surprised.

jeongguk bit his lip again. “the thing is, do you really wanna do that? she’s your only family.”

yoongi smiled. “gguk-ah.” he wrapped his arms around the younger’s waist and tiptoed to place a kiss on his forehead. “remember, family is not always the one you’re born into.”

“so, it’s decided?” jin asked from the side, hopeful.

yoongi leaned his forehead on jeongguk’s chest for a second and drew in a deep breath. it’s not like the decision was exactly hard to make, between yona and his newfound family, his life, jeongguk , there was no question about which one he would choose. but it didn’t mean the plan was gonna work. but right now, yoongi didn’t care, because jeongguk was right. it was their best bet to get rid of everything that was haunting them both, once and for all.

yoongi placed a kiss on jeongguk’s lips and with a smirk, he turned around. “let’s do this.”

***

“gguk-ah, please stop worrying. it’s going to be fine.”

“are you absolutely sure about this?” jeongguk sounded concerned on the other end of the line. 

yoongi smiled. “i am. as i’ve told you before. many times.”

“i’m just—” his voice was tiny, barely above a whisper. “i wish you’d let me help you. i don’t like this. you going in there alone.”

yoongi felt bad. he knew jeongguk was stressed and anxious, he would’ve been too if things were the other way around. just sitting still with nothing to do, waiting for a call either from yoongi, telling that it’s done or from the cops, telling that something had gone wrong. luckily jeongguk wasn’t alone, their whole friend group was gathered at jin’s and joon’s. yoongi knew they would help calm the younger down. 

talking to the police had been surprisingly easy. his record wasn’t the greatest and the chief of the station had been suspicious at first, which was fair, yoongi didn’t blame him. but then they’d contacted the department that had been trying to nail yona and her crew for years and they’d recognized jeongguk from the time he’d been in juvie and made a deal with them. after that, things just started moving forward on their own accord. 

yona hadn’t contacted him in two weeks. two whole weeks. jeongguk had started to get restless when he didn’t hear from anyone either. yoongi had tried to assure him that yona was probably just saving him for the bigger, more complicated jobs. he knew how his sister worked. he knew she wouldn’t put him in a position where he would have to bend the lines of his morals too much, but neither would she waste his talents on matters too small. so he waited. 

and then the call came. it was a simple drop, but the people in question were ones yona didn’t trust. at all. so she wanted her ‘best men’ on the job. haneul included. yoongi didn’t like it, not one bit and he had no idea why yona would put the two of them on the same team. he wasn’t sure if he would be able to control himself and he was beyond relieved when the plan they made with the detective was that they would try to get yona before it came to the actual job. 

yoongi’s mission was to wear a wire to the meeting where they would go over the plan for the drop. it was perfect. yona would be there, haneul would be there, a few of yona’s other big fish would be there. also, the meeting took place in an old abandoned warehouse, so it would be easier for the team to surround them and get in as soon as they heard enough to press charges. yoongi just had to get her to talk. that was the hard part. yona wasn’t one to brag. but yoongi knew her, better than anyone. and he had a plan. 

“hyung? are you there?”

yoongi was woken up from his thoughts. “yeah, gguk-ah, i’m here. sorry for spacing out.”

jeongguk mumbled something inaudible. then, “hyung, it’s not too late. i can still get there in time. i wanna help.”

yoongi sighed, together with his alpha. “baby, i know you want to. but right now staying safe is the best that you can do. i wouldn’t be able to concentrate if you were here, you know that.”

“i can protect myself,” jeongguk’s pout was fully audible and yoongi couldn’t help but smile at that.

“i know you can. but i’d still worry. i’ll always worry about you. that doesn’t mean i think you’re weak. that means i love you.”

“i love you too.” jeongguk’s voice was a little shaky now. yoongi could feel a lump in his throat too. 

he tried to gather himself. this would all be over in two hours. “i have to go soon.”

“just,” jeongguk took a deep breath. “be careful.”

“i will.” and he really meant it.  “i’ll see you soon.”

“see you soon, hyung.”

yoongi ended the call and glanced around. he was standing three blocks away from the meeting spot, all wired up and ready to go. he closed his eyes and reeled himself in, trying his best to calm his rapidly beating heart. forty-five minutes before their agreed meeting time at midnight. yoongi took a final glance at his phone and then switched it to silent. he didn’t need distractions tonight. this was it. the detective had been really thorough when preparing him for this mission. they had this one chance. if this whole thing failed, if yoongi failed, it would be over, yoongi’s cover would be blown and they all would be in real trouble. 

no pressure. 

Chapter Text

yoongi took a deep breath, eyeing the staircase with suspicion. the building really was abandoned, many, many years ago by the looks of it. the windows were all broken, one of the three stairwells collapsed completely and the second floor was simply gone, the structure of the flooring given up and fallen down, the rubble blocking the ground floor except for the stairs. the air was damp and stuffy, blocking yoongi’s senses, which made him more uncomfortable than he’d like to admit. 

he got to the fifth floor and didn’t have to look for long until his eyes found his sister, along with haneul and the three other men he was supposed to meet here. 

yona flashed him a smile. “so, now that yoongi was kind enough to grace us with his presence, i think we’re all here.”

yoongi shot a glare at his sister. he’d been here on time, but that didn’t matter. this was pure power play. this was what yona did best.

haneul smirked at him, leaning casually on one of the concrete pillars. “nice to have you back, min.”

he had some nerve. yoongi growled lightly back at the alpha standing opposite of him, brow furrowed. he’d been sure he could keep his alpha in check when it came to yona. but trying to remain civil with haneul was almost too much for him. no amount of practise and self control would’ve been able to keep the sour undertone from seeping into his scent.

“boys, play nice.” yona flashed them both a tired look. “we have more important matters at hand.”

yoongi reeled his annoyance in and moved his gaze away from the smug smirk on haneul’s face. he really did have more important things to do here. yoongi rolled his shoulders, trying to keep his body language relaxed, nonchalant. “so, how are we gonna do this?”

“ahh, dear brother, always straight to the point.” yona smiled at him, gently, her tone uncharacteristically soft. “i like it. i do. but first, i have a question for you.” she remained calm, collected, like always. her scent was barely detectable with yoongi’s dulled senses, but he could still feel the familiar aura of serenity that seemed to always surround his sister in situations like these. 

it felt like the calm before a raging thunderstorm. yoongi didn’t like the atmosphere at all. he had a bad feeling about this. 

“so ask,” he quipped, jaw tightened.

yona chuckled. “did you know about your boyfriend’s little plan?”

“what?” yoongi raised a brow at her. that wasn’t a good sign. but he could still save this. he had to.

yona ignored him. “i gotta admit, it was a good plan. your little omega is a brave one.”

yoongi’s blood ran cold. “i have no idea what you’re talking about.” he had an idea what had happened, though. his whole body tensed, fingernails digging into his palms, scent thickening. and everyone in the room could tell that he was lying. 

yona raised a brow at him and flipped her wrist, a snappy little motion that carried all the amount of power she held. “bring him.”

one of the men disappeared into a room that was surprisingly still intact on the far end of the floor and came back moments later, dragging someone with him. yoongi knew where this was going. he didn’t need to catch his scent to realize who it was. 

jeongguk. yoongi could feel the fire burning in his veins, the painful flash of anger, frustration. he tried his best to stay in control of his instincts, but one look at jeongguk’s bruised up face and he almost broke down. how did he get here? they’d just been talking on the phone and jeongguk had been safe and sound, with their friends, right where he was supposed to be? yoongi had no idea what was going on, but that wasn’t really important right now. the only thing that mattered was that he needed to figure out a way for them both to get out of here alive. 

“what are you doing?” yoongi tried to keep his voice from shaking too much. “we had a deal.”

yona shot him a disappointed look. “our deal had nothing about you going to the cops.”

“you’ve made a mistake. who told you that? haneul? do you really think you can trust him when u can’t even keep him in line, following your orders?” yoongi tried to keep his eyes strictly on yona. he could still see jeongguk in his peripheral vision, his body limp in the hold of the man who had dragged him out, his hands behind his back, barely staying upright. it looked like he was barely conscious. yoongi’s eyes sharpened. 

“don’t bother. i know what you’re doing. you forget that i taught you everything you know.” yona was starting to sound bored now, crossing her arms and motioning with a quick nod to the two men standing on the side. 

“i—” yoongi already knew there was nothing to save here. he was just stalling to buy them some time. for what, he didn't know. he was making it all up as he went on. “i came here to do a job. like we agreed. i don’t know how you got the idea that i was going to double cross you. and i certainly don’t appreciate you taking my boyfriend captive and threatening us for no reason.”

yona threw her head back and laughed. yoongi heard haneul’s chuckle somewhere on his left, but paid it no mind. the other men were startled by their boss’s reaction, but yoongi remained still, gaze steeled, not relaxing even one bit. 

“i sure missed you, brother,” yona smirked and wiped her eyes. “i gotta say, you really are good. i taught you well. you have no idea how much i wish this was just a misunderstanding. but we both know that’s not the case, you can drop the act. i know there’s about half of this town’s police force out there, ready to barge in the second they have what they want.”

yoongi’s eyes widened as realization dawned on him. “the whole plan was a lie. there is no job. you tricked me.”

yona’s smile was almost a little sad now. “you played well. but you lead us all into a dead end.” yona turned and walked over to jeongguk. yoongi felt something wet on his palms, his nails breaking the skin and drawing blood from the force he was clenching his fists with. “your rich kid boyfriend is gonna come with us. you’re free to go. after all, you are my brother. i respect my family. maybe too much for my own good.”

panic flashed through yoongi's body, his instincts flaring up, like his veins were on fire. there was no way he was going to let them leave with jeongguk. the younger raised his head briefly, eyes hazy, but sharpening when they locked with yoongi’s. jeongguk mouthed something at him, but yoongi couldn’t make sense of the words. his brain was going into overdrive, trying to understand what was happening.

yona turned her back at him, starting to walk away with two of his men close behind her. the third one started dragging jeongguk backwards to go with them, but he seemed to have regained some of his strength back, and started fighting against the man’s hold. yoongi leaped forward, abandoning every bit of a rational plan he’d been trying to come up with, only caring about the fact that they were trying to take jeongguk away from him. 

“oh no, i don’t think you’re getting out of this that easily.”

click

the tiny sound made yoongi freeze right where he stood. jeongguk’s eyes went wide, his head whipping to the side at the same time as yoongi’s. 

haneul was standing next to the pillar, at the same spot where he’d been for this whole time. but now, he was staring straight at yoongi, arm extended, the black metal of a gun flashing in the dim lighting. his eyes were black, cold, and yoongi didn’t need to catch his scent to realize that the other alpha wasn’t messing around. 

yoongi could see yona whipping around from the corner of his eye, he could see jeongguk fighting himself free, their shouting muffled in his ears, like he was underwater. but the words didn’t register, he was frozen in place, his limbs refusing to work, his legs refusing to move even though his alpha was screaming at him, going feral inside of his chest. 

yoongi wasn’t sure whose voice was screaming his name when the gun went off. 

a force slammed into him, knocking him down, pain flashing through his side. yoongi had never been shot before, but the pain was surprisingly not as bad as he’d expected, a lot duller, throbbing mostly on his back—

wait a minute. 

yoongi opened his eyes. he didn’t remember closing them. first he noticed the weight of another person on him. and right after, the sharp, crispy scent of lemons filled all of his senses. followed by blood. 

he scrambled backwards, sliding his upper body from under jeongguk’s limp one. the front of yoongi’s shirt was drenched in blood, but he didn’t care, hardly even noticed. gently, he rolled the younger to the side, to lay on the dusty concrete floor, all the while trying frantically to figure out what had just happened. 

“jeongguk!” he stared in horror at the rapidly widening red stain on the shoulder of jeongguk’s white t-shirt. “no, no, no, no, no—” his hands flew into action, pressing down on the gunshot wound.

jeongguk’s brow furrowed but his eyes stayed closed, his body going lax under yoongi’s hands. he was pretty sure that jeongguk was somehow drugged, he’d seemed so sluggish and weak at the hold of the man. 

the man. haneul. yona. 

yoongi’s eyes whipped up. the room was empty. all of them were gone. 

it didn’t take long for yoongi to notice the sound of multiple boots stomping up the staircase. the police were here. somewhere far away, he could hear a siren, probably an ambulance called by one of the cops after they’d heard haneul’s gun going off. 

the room was quickly filled with action again. the detective ran to yoongi, thought he barely noticed when the man dropped to his knees beside him, trying to talk to him. his men scattered and started searching the place. but yoongi knew yona was long gone by now. she wouldn’t have walked in here if she hadn’t had an escape route planned. 

jeongguk’s body started shaking and yoongi’s eyes focused once again, whipping down to the younger, who turned sideways to cough up the blood gathering into his mouth. yoongi felt powerless, so utterly lost, defeated. all he could do was wait for the paramedics. 

he had failed. 

***

“aren’t you coming in?”

yoongi was snapped out of his thoughts. seokjin was standing by his side, looking at him with visible concern in his eyes. yoongi shrugged, gaze dropping down. he’d come here to see jeongguk. he wanted to go in. but somehow he’d just stopped, before even getting to the main entrance. he felt so unsure, so small standing in the shadow of the tall hospital building. 

jin sighed. “it’s okay if you don’t want to. but i know he would like to see you.”

“he’s not even awake yet,” yoongi mumbled. it was a wonder jin could even hear him.

he felt arms wrapping around him and then he was pulled into a tight hug. “i know you went through a lot. but i also know seeing him, being with him will make you feel better.”

“i know,” yoongi mumbled into jin’s hoodie. “i’ll come. just, give me a few minutes.”

“take your time.” jin smiled at him. “call me if you need anything.”

yoongi watched as seokjin turned around and started walking to the entrance. rest of their friends were already waiting by the doors. he huffed, frustrated. he wanted nothing more than to run inside, run straight into jeongguk’s room, take him into his arms and never let go.

but his legs weren’t listening to his brain’s commands. 

if yoongi was being honest, he knew the reason for his stalling. he wasn’t sure if he was ready to see jeongguk, ready to see the consequences of his own carelessness. he felt guilty. jeongguk getting shot had been his fault, after all. but it had happened, all because yoongi had been so dumb and thought he could trick his sister into getting caught, when no one else had even come close to succeeding before. and so, jeongguk took a bullet that had been meant for yoongi. he wasn’t sure if he could ever forgive himself for what had happened yesterday. 

yoongi  felt a light tap on his shoulder and turned around, brow furrowed in confusion.

a hooded figure stood behind him, hands casually in the pockets of a long wool coat. “can’t go in?”

“what the hell are you doing here?” yoongi growled at his sister. his alpha flared up, fire spreading in his chest, but somehow, it was quickly buried under the same powerless feeling from last night. yona had won. there was no use fighting back anymore. 

she threw the hood back from her face and smiled at him, a gentle, sad quirk of her lips. “i wanted to check up on you. i didn’t like the way we left things.” there was something in her scent that caught yoongi’s attention, some kind of a spike. it couldn’t be? regret? 

yoongi scoffed, trying to hold on to the last shreds of dignity he had left. “and you thought now is the time to start acting like a good big sister? i don’t care. i want nothing to do with you.”

yona’s eyes skimmed over the hospital building towering over them. “your omega is gonna be just fine. he’s strong.” then she turned her attention back to yoongi. “for what it’s worth, i really meant what i said that day when we had breakfast at your place.”

yoongi was tired. so tired of her games. “what are you talking about?”

there’s that sad smile again. “i’m happy for you. i know you. like i said, you do stupid things for the people you love. but i think you have finally met your match. that boy literally took a bullet for you.”

yoongi felt his anger bubbling up again at the mention of last night. “you know that this is all your fault, don’t you? did you think i could forgive you? is that why you came here? if so, you’re crazier than i ever thought.”

“i didn’t come here for forgiveness. i’m not apologizing. i didn’t come to fight either.” yona’s scent was calm as ever, but there was still this almost undetectable undertone that yoongi just couldn’t figure out. “you’re brave, brother. so is your omega. i really wish only happiness for you two.”

“that’s just a little bit hard to believe right now.” yoongi almost laughed, the whole situation was so ridiculous. “just, take the victory and go. i failed. you know that as well as i do.”

yona shrugged. “i guess your goal was to get rid of me. and haneul. you did that.” she threw on the hood again and took a step back. “i won’t be coming back here. not for a long time at least. jeongguk won’t hear from us again. i’ll make sure of it.”

“if you’re expecting me to thank you for that, you’ll be waiting for a long time.”

“i’m not.” her eyes were steeled, cold, but they lingered on yoongi’s for a bit too long for her expression to be believable. “just, take care of yourself. and him.” she took another step back. “i hope we meet again. you’re my brother. that’s not something i can let go of that easily.”

yoongi didn’t have time to reply when she was already turning around and disappearing into the crowd. and to be honest, he wouldn’t have had the words to reply with either. he had no idea why yona had come back to talk to him. the only logical explanation was that this was just one of her games again, part of something yoongi didn’t know yet. and he surely didn’t want to find out.

but a teeny tiny voice inside of him was wondering, could it be possible that she really had been sincere. it came from the part of his brain that remembered how everything used to be between them, long time ago. remembered how his big sister had taken care of him when they were little. how she’d been there for him, how she’d taught yoongi everything he knew, how to control his alpha, how to learn to work with his inner wolf. how there was nothing more important than love and loyalty. how they’d been a family, just the two of them. 

he finally figured out what the emotion had been in his sister’s scent when she’d turned around to leave. 

despair. 

***

jeongguk blinked his eyes open. white. everywhere. he whipped his head to the side, core muscles tensing when he tried to sit up properly, but the throbbing pain on his shoulder and the soreness in his sides prevented all movement quite effectively.

he glanced at his right. monitors, with all kinds of lines and numbers that told him absolutely nothing. iv-bag hanging from the pole next to him, connecting to the tube going straight into his arm. he looked around the room. just white. everywhere. 

he felt his breathing getting quicker, shorter breaths that would soon turn into hyperventilating. he knew this, had heard the explanation many many times when he’d been younger. he hadn’t had a panic attack in years.

well, he hadn’t been in the hospital for years either. 

“breathe,” he mumbled to himself, nails digging into his palms, eyes screwed shut. “you’re okay, it’s okay—”

the door creaked, so silently that jeongguk almost missed it, too immersed into battling his own mind. probably a nurse. or a doctor. that didn’t make jeongguk feel any better. 

he almost jumped out of his skin, shocked to the core when a familiar scent hit his nose and at the same time he felt careful, gentle hands cupping his chin and lifting his face up. jeongguk’s eyes flew wide open. 

“what’s wrong?” yoongi’s eyes were filled with alarm, but still, his voice was calm. “are you in pain? should i call the nurse?”

“no!” that came out a bit harsher than jeongguk had meant. yoongi startled, but recovered quickly, sitting down sideways next to jeongguk, one hand on his waist, one petting his hair behind his ear. jeongguk huffed, trying to get his heartbeat to calm down, trying to get his body to stop shaking.

yoongi tilted his head, concern flashing in his scent. “okay, if you’re sure,” the alpha said, calmly, but jeongguk suspected he had a hard time containing his inner wolf. but he was trying, for jeongguk’s sake. 

finally, jeongguk’s was able to take a few deep breaths, yoongi’s presence calming him down, even with the thick layer of distress in the air. “so.” jeongguk tried to smile, but it didn’t really fit the atmosphere of the room. he wasn’t even sure what he was going to say, just wanted to break the silence. 

“so.” yoongi just sat there, his scent filled with worry and anxiety. if jeongguk had still been on blockers, he wouldn’t have noticed anything, though. yoongi really was a master of hiding his emotions. maybe the alpha could teach him too. 

jeongguk sighed, the adrenaline from the near panic attack fading from his body. he was starting to feel a dull ache in his shoulder. 

“jeongguk, what happened?” yoongi finally huffed out, like he’d been holding back for a while. “why were you there?” he sounded tired, really tired, and jeongguk wanted nothing more than to curl in his lap and bury his nose into the alpha’s neck, he wanted to wipe all of that sadness away. but he couldn’t exactly do that right now. he suspected moving like that would hurt quite a lot. 

he tilted his head, trying to clear the fog in his mind, without a doubt caused by the painkillers. “you were in danger.”

“idiot,” yoongi grumbled. “we had a plan. you can’t just go rogue like that. why did you leave jin’s and joon’s? i get that you wanted to help, but i told you, i told you to stay there and wait for me, that’s what we agreed—”

“she knew.” 

yoongi blinked. “what?”

jeongguk furrowed his brow, annoyed. “she knew about the plan. before you even arrived there.”

“again, what?” the alpha was tilting his head in confusion, a tiny sliver of anger still in his scent.

but jeongguk was getting a little angry too. “jeonhyun called me.”

*** 

jeongguk stared at the phone in his hand and then clutched the device into his chest, tears shining in the corners of his eyes.

“he’s going to be alright, gguk.” jimin came to stand behind him, leaning his forehead on jeongguk’s back. “hyung knows what he’s doing.”

“i guess.” jeongguk hated the way his voice came out, so tiny and unsure. he trusted yoongi, he really did, but he couldn’t help the crippling ache inside of his chest, knowing that his alpha was headed into a potentially dangerous situation.

“he has seen worse.” seokjin was standing behind the kitchen counter, chopping his life away. jeongguk couldn’t detect any emotions from the beta, but he knew jin well enough to know that he was anxious too, even if he tried to stay calm for the sake of everyone else, and make others feel better while he was at it. hence the cooking. 

“is that supposed to make me feel better?” jeongguk hummed, a humorless smile spreading on his lips. he slowly walked toward the living room, dragging jimin along with him. the other omega had been glued onto him ever since yoongi left for the meeting. jeongguk didn’t mind. he appreciated the comfort. 

seokjin tilted his head at him. “maybe. maybe not. it’s just— i know you haven’t seen him like that, not really. he’s come a long way since those days and it might be hard to believe looking at him now, but he knows his way with those kind of people. he was once like them.”

jeongguk didn’t realize he was growling until jimin drew him down on the couch with him and nuzzled his shoulder gently. “ggukie, he didn’t mean it like that,” the older omega whispered, anxiety spiking up in his scent.

jeongguk startled. he hadn’t realized how wild his omega was running. he still had a hard time containing his inner wolf, especially when he wasn’t actively paying attention to it. “i’m sorry, hyung.” his gaze fell to the floor. 

“it’s okay, gguk-ah. i get it.” seokjin’s voice was soft, a little bittersweet. “your omega is really instinctual. you just want to protect him. i’m glad that he has you.”

jeongguk slumped back on the couch, curling into jimin’s side. taehyung and namjoon were downstairs, helping hoseok who was closing up the bar. they’d be here soon, too. jeongguk was grateful for his friends, he didn’t want to even imagine what it would be like to be alone right now.

jimin started petting his sides gently, his sweet, floral scent covering jeongguk in comfort like a soft blanket had been curled around him. “it won’t take long. he promised he’d call right after it’s done.”

“yeah. it’s just—” jeongguk was cut off by the sound of his phone ringing. all three heads whipped to the buzzing device on the coffee table. jeongguk blinked and then shot up. 

“who is it?” 

“it can’t be yoongi-hyung, it’s only been like twenty min—”

their voices faded out in jeongguk’s ears, his heart pounding so fast that it drowned out every other sound around him. 

unknown number. 

“hello?” jeongguk’s voice cracked a little.

“hyung?”

“jeonhyun?” jeongguk couldn’t hide the surprise in his voice. “what do you want?” 

“hyung, you have to help me, please.” his brother’s voice was pleading. “you were right.”

“help you with what?” jeongguk ran his fingers through his hair and huffed, frustrated. “get to the point. i’m kinda busy here.”

jeonhyun took a deep breath on the other end of the line. “i’m in jail. well, not yet, but they’re gonna take me soon.” his voice was low, jeongguk had to escape the background noise from jin’s cooking into the next room in order to hear him. “i fucked up. we were on a job, it went bad, haneul ran but they got me. they brought me to the station and i knew yona had someone here, i tried to get in contact with her, but they wouldn’t help me.”

jeongguk gulped. yona had people inside the police force? like moles? what? “yeah? what does that have to do with me? why are you telling me this?”

“she got mad. like, really mad. you were right, she doesn’t give a fuck about me, none of them do. hyung, please. i wouldn’t call you if i wasn’t desperate, but i didn’t know what else to do. i have no one else. and we’re family, after all. i’m so sorry, hyung, please believe me, i see it now, i see how horrible i was to you, i see how fucked up this whole thing is, i wish i’d listened to you when i had the chance, hyung, i really do, please help me, please—”

“you’re right, maybe you should’ve listened to me.” jeongguk felt a tiny sting in his heart. but there was no way he was going to just drop everything to run to his brother’s aid, after everything he’d done. especially not now. “go call your new friends for help and leave me alone.”

jeonhyun’s voice was starting to get so high pitched it was harder and harder to make sense of it. “hyung, you’re not listening to me. i tried, she hung up. they don’t care.” he fell silent for a moment and jeongguk had to check on the screen to make sure the phone hadn’t disconnected. but then jeonhyun continued, “and they’re kinda busy right now anyway. something about setting a trap for some idiot who used to work for yona. hyung, you were right, this world is not for me. i didn’t know, i had no idea how cruel she could be, but then i heard what they were planning and—”

jeongguk felt like the floor had disappeared from under him. “what?”

“what do you mean what? hyung, are you listening to me?”

“what was that about a trap?”

“yeah, i’m sorry, it has nothing to do with this, i just—”

“tell. me.” jeongguk’s voice was just pure growling by now.

“fuck, okay.” jeonhyun gulped audibly. “i don’t know much about it, just that they’re meeting tonight and that yona found out he’s trying to double-cross her or something. i really don’t know hyung, what does that have to do with anyth—”

the phone slipped from jeongguk’s fingers and fell onto the floor, the screen probably cracking, but he didn’t care. 

yoongi. jeongguk has to warn him. 

***

jeongguk huffed, eyes down on his lap. “i tried to call you, text you, i tried to get a hold of the detective. no one was picking up. i had to do something . i needed to get to you. i needed to make sure you were okay.”

yoongi was silent for a long while. so long that jeongguk had to take a careful peek at the alpha. he was just sitting there, completely frozen still, eyes somewhere far away. jeongguk slid his healthy arm forward, fingertips lighty tracing the back of yoongi’s hand. that seemed to snap the older back to focus. “gguk-ah.” yoongi’s voice was barely above a whisper. “okay, i take it back, i’m sorry, you’re not an idiot. i would’ve done the same.” there was no anger left in his scent. 

jeongguk smiled. “that’s what i thought.”

yoongi tilted his head sharply, moving a little closer, careful not to jostle jeongguk’s body too much. “but still, i could’ve handled it. you can’t do things like that on your own. that’s dangerous.”

jeongguk’s brow furrowed, distress flaring through his body again. “you did. you made the deal with yona without telling me.”

“that was different.” yoongi started slowly petting his side again, clearly trying to calm him. 

“how?” he wasn’t really hurt, but this was a touchy subject for him. “because you’re an alpha?”

yoongi eyed him, brow furrowing a little. “no. baby. you know i don’t think like that.” his voice was firm, and jeongguk felt a little stupid. they’d been over this, countless times, he knew he had no reason to doubt the alpha. but some habits die hard. 

jeongguk bit his bottom lip, reeling in his omega pride. “then why?”

yoongi smiled and picked up his hand to intertwine their fingers, slowly, gently. “i know her. not as well as i thought, but at the time, i thought i had it all figured out. i thought i was two steps ahead of her. we all did.” the older took a deep breath, traces of past fear, anxiety flashing in his scent. “you were running straight into the unknown, straight into a situation you knew would end up badly. that’s too reckless, gguk-ah.”

“what else could i have done? do you really think it would’ve been possible for me to just sit there, waiting for the call from the detective, telling me that it had all gone to shit? that you’d gotten hurt? that you’d—” jeongguk hooked his healthy arm around yoongi’s neck and drew the alpha down into a hug, not minding one bit the tiny flash of pain he felt from the sudden movement.

“it’s okay. it’s over now,” yoongi mumbled into his neck, nosing over his scent gland, coating him with the comforting familiarity of the alpha’s scent from head to toe. jeongguk had come to love scenting, now that he’d become comfortable with it. he was still a little careful when it came to friends, but with yoongi, he loved it. 

but even with the comfort he got from yoongi, he still worried. “but we didn’t get them. it’s not over.”

yoongi placed a kiss on his collarbone and moved a little so he could wrap his arm around jeongguk’s waist. “trust me, she isn’t coming back. you don’t ever have to see them again. not haneul, not yona. i promise.” another kiss on his jawline, soft lips tracing his features. 

jeongguk hummed. “hyung?” 

“yeah?” yoongi stopped, his face above jeongguk’s, so close that he could feel the word spoken against his lips. 

jeongguk surged up for a quick kiss, then leaned back as quickly and smirked. “you’re leaning on my shoulder.”

yoongi stumbled back, his hands flying off of jeongguk’s body, eyes wild. “i’m sorry, oh my— are you in pain? i’m gonna call the nurse, just let me—”

jeongguk laughed and yoongi looked at him with wide eyes, scent flaring up with confusion. “no, i’m not, don’t you dare leave.” jeongguk chuckled and drew the older back down to lay beside him. he wrapped his hand around the front of yoongi’s hoodie and dragged him forward for a proper kiss this time. “hyung, i’m never letting you out of my sight ever again. you’re not allowed to go anywhere .”

yoongi smiled against his lips. “right back at you, baby.”

jeongguk’s heart was singing, beating steadily, his omega humming happily in his chest. he was safe, he was happy, he was loved. this was his home now. yoongi was his home. 

and that’s all that mattered.

Chapter Text

jeongguk sat down at the booth and after hesitating for just a moment, he picked up the phone on the side.

“hi hyung.”

“hi.” it was weird, seeing his brother’s lips moving on the other side of the plex, but hearing his voice right next to his left ear.  

“why are you here?” jeonhyun’s eyes were weary, his gaze cautious, his posture stiff, like he was ready to bolt whenever. 

jeongguk sighed, tilted his head quickly, a habit of his whenever he was nervous, or didn’t know what to do. yoongi had taken a mission of making jeongguk aware of every single one of his tells, so that he could learn better emotion control. controlling your pheromones meant controlling your body language first. but now wasn’t the time for that. he just wanted to get this over with, he didn’t come here to practise.

“so?” his brother was getting anxious, waiting for his reply.

“i wanna know the truth,” jeongguk stated calmly, looking his brother straight in the eyes, determination in his tone. “i need to know the truth.”

“about what?”

“don’t.” jeongguk shook his head. “don’t give me that. i know something happened. after i left. something happened that made you run off to haneul. and i know you blame me. so i’d like to know what i’m being accused of.”

“ah.” jeonhyun’s shoulders relaxed, just a little. “mom and dad sure kept it pretty quiet, so i guess i don’t blame you for not knowing.”

jeongguk’s brow furrowed. “kept what quiet?”

“mom left,” his brother just stated, blankly.

“what do you mean ‘mom left’? when?” jeongguk was clutching the phone in his hand, increasingly confused with the conversation. “why?”

“a little after they found out you got caught and were going to juvie.” jeonhyun sighed. “i don’t know exactly what happened, one night i heard them fighting and the next day she was gone. no note, no messages, nothing. she just left us. i haven’t heard from her since.”

“i—” jeongguk was kind of speechless. this was something he hadn’t seen coming. “i’m sorry. i know what it feels like to be abandoned by your parents. but that doesn’t explain why you blame me for that.”

jeonhyun’s jaw tightened visibly. he was on blockers now, of course, but jeongguk could imagine how his scent would’ve flared up just then if he wasn’t. “she left because of you. they fought about you. mom was blaming dad for abandoning you, whatever that means, and dad was shouting at mom for being weak. i don’t know the details, but what i do know, is that you were the reason my mom left me. you destroyed my family.”

“look.” jeongguk took a deep breath. he could see where jeonhyun was coming from, but that didn’t mean he would just take all the blame. not when his brother didn’t even know his side of the story. “i didn’t come here to fight. i’m gonna tell you what happened while you were away from home. what you do with that information and whether you believe or not, that’s up to you. but you deserve to know my truth too.”

and he talked. starting from the beginning, all those years ago, from the day he’d presented as an omega. he talked about those years he was at home with his parents while his brother was studying abroad and all the things that happened during those years, how little by little, he became less of a member of the jeon family and more of a burden to their name. and finally, he told about the running away, moving in with haneul, about the night when he found out his parents had just been trying to get rid of him without making a huge fuss with the press and how haneul had just been using him for the money.

“after i got out, i lived by myself for almost a year. i have no idea how i survived.” jeongguk shrugged. that time was just a bad memory now, but the reminder still made his heart ache a little. “but then i found yoongi-hyung. and my other friends. and the rest you know.”

“i—” jeonhyun was staring back at him, eyes wide. “i had no idea.”

jeongguk smiled. he felt a little bad for his brother, yes, but still. jeonhyun had jumped to conclusions without knowing all the facts and done horrible things based on his own assumptions. he really didn’t deserve jeongguk’s compassion. “i figured. dad isn’t exactly the type to advertise all his flaws.”

“hyung, i’m— i’m so sorry.”

“i don’t need that. i didn’t come here looking for an apology.” jeongguk bit his bottom lip in thought. he knew why he’d come here. that didn’t mean it was going to be easy for him. “you’re my little brother. i just wanted closure. now you know everything. i hope you’ll be able to think about your actions and take responsibility for all the things you’ve done and do what’s right in the future. that’s the best apology you can give.” then he placed the phone back on the wall and stood up. he was about to turn and walk away, when he saw jeonhyun waving rather aggressively at him on the other side, pointing at the phone.

jeongguk picked it up again, not bothering to sit down. “what?”

“will you visit me?”

jeongguk looked down at his brother who was looking back at him with pleading eyes. “no.”

jeonhyun flinched, eyes flying wide again, clearly surprised. “what?”

“i said i wanted closure. nothing more.” jeongguk kept his tone firm, stable. this is what he wanted. he wasn’t going to get sucked into his family’s problems. not anymore. 

“but— you’re my brother! we’re family!” jeonhyun’s voice got louder, higher, a wild look in his eyes, holding the phone up to his ear with both hands.

jeongguk tilted his head, eyes steeled. “are we? sharing the same blood doesn’t automatically mean we’re family. something i’ve had to learn.” with that, he let go of the phone for the last time and walked away. 

***

yoongi was leaning on the hood of jimin’s car, twirling his phone on his hands, waiting for jeongguk to come back. finally, the buzzer rang and the metal gate started sliding open. jeongguk walked to him, looking tired, but there was nothing alarming in his scent, so yoongi just waited, smiling softly as the younger walked to him.

he curled his arms around him. “how did it go?”

jeongguk nosed at his temple and yoongi felt him sighing deeply. “okay. he listened to what i had to say. just what i wanted.”

yoongi gathered his face between his palms and searched for any discomfort in his eyes. there was none. “i’m glad. i know i said it wasn’t a good idea to come here straight from the hospital, but i see that this is something you had to do.”

“thank you for taking me here,” jeongguk tucked his head into yoongi’s neck, breathing in, melting against his chest. “let’s go home?”

yoongi huffed, carding his fingers through the younger’s silky soft hair. “yeah.”

they didn’t speak for the whole ride home. jeongguk played around with the stations, apparently not satisfied with the music choices on any of them. yoongi’s mind was somewhere far, far away.

he was thinking about he first time they’d met. the look in jeongguk’s eyes back then. like he had no one, trusted in no one, least of all himself. the way he’d been so careful around them all back then, like he'd been afraid that if he’d take even the tiniest step into the wrong direction, they’d abandon him right there. and when yoongi had gotten to know jeongguk better, he’d learned the exact reason why the younger was how he was. and to be honest, he couldn't blame the younger for acting the way he had. 

but all of that was in the past. though yoongi doubted jeongguk would ever forget all of his scars, or how he got them. it wasn’t like the younger didn’t have things to work on, to improve, to get better at, but hell, everyone had those things. every single human on this earth had their own traumas and some of them would have to work on them for the rest of their lives. maybe jeongguk too. 

the important thing here was that jeongguk wasn’t alone anymore. he hadn't been really alone for a while now. but yoongi could finally see jeongguk starting to accept that. he was coming out of his shell. and not just with yoongi, but with himself too. 

“hyung?” 

yoongi was woken up from his thoughts by jeongguk’s tiny voice coming from his right. he looked over and slid his hand over the console. jeongguk placed his own on his palm and squeezed. 

“what are you thinking about?”

a warm smile spread on yoongi’s lips. “you. us. the universe.”

“what about us?” jeongguk’s eyes were curious, his scent calm and content. 

yoongi let out a small chuckle. “we never had a choice.”

“what?”

“i think there’s people you’re destined to meet. we’re like that.” yoongi eyed the younger and turned his attention back to the road while he continued. “think about it. we were connected even before we knew each other. and if you have to look for a silver lining in everything that’s happened, it’s this. us.”

jeongguk was silent for a while. then, “hyung?”

“mm?”

“thank you. for being here.”

“always, gguk-ah. i’ll always be here.”

***

jeongguk was led up the stairs, one of yoongi's hands resting on the small of his back. the alpha had been extra careful with him after they’d left the hospital this morning, fussing over him. jeongguk didn't mind. he felt safe. 

yoongi stopped right in front of the apartment door. “okay, just so you’re prepared, you know how our friends can go a little overboard from time to time?”

jeongguk’s brow furrowed in confusion. “what do you mean?” 

“gguk-ah!” jimin was first to throw his arms around his neck when they got inside, taehyung right behind the oldest omega, both of them drawn to jeongguk’s side like magnets. “we missed you!”

“be careful,” yoongi grumbled next to them, but jeongguk saw the tiny quirk of his lips. 

jeongguk smiled and hugged both of his friends back, letting them drag him further inside.

yoongi had been right. the apartment was turned into a full blown welcome home -party, seokjin had made all of jeongguk’s favorite foods and all of their friends were here. but jeongguk wasn’t complaining. he’d never had this. never had people like this in his life. it was still somewhat new to him, a little overwhelming, but he loved it. it was nice. he’d spent so much time trying to prove that he could handle everything by himself, it was nice to let himself be taken care of and not feel guilty about it.

they all gathered in the living room, jeongguk curled up on the couch next to yoongi, a blanket drawn over him, a cup of warm tea in his hand. per yoongi’s request, or well, jeongguk suspected there hasn't really been room to argue, this welcome home -party was strictly non-alcoholic. jeongguk was still on heavy painkillers, so no drinking. jeongguk had smiled widely when yoongi had brought him a mug of his favorite black fruity tea. the alpha knew him so well. 

“that was the dumbest thing anyone has ever done,” seokjin huffed after yoongi and jeongguk got to end of their story about what had happened at the warehouse for the millionth time. all of them had heard it before, at least the short version, but jimin and tae had been whining for half an hour to hear it again. 

yoongi’s arm was wrapped around jeongguk’s waist and he was drawn into the alpha’s side, held tightly. “i agree,” yoongi huffed and placed a kiss on the top of his head. “but it’s not like i wouldn’t have done the same.”

“i love you guys, but i’m not sure if i can take hyung being this sappy,” jimin groaned from jeongguk’s other side. 

“i love sappy.” jeongguk placed a kiss on the side of yoongi’s jaw, which made the older purr gently. 

“you really are meant to be,” seokjin’s laughter came from the kitchen now, probably on his way to fetch them more tea and snacks. “equally whipped.”

jeongguk smiled into yoongi’s chest. he was happy, body relaxing and molding into yoongi’s, fitting there perfectly. he could feel yoongi’s low purr against his cheek, felt his heartbeat, calm, steady rhythm the same as his own. jeongguk didn’t quite believe in fate, but if there was such a thing, this is what it must feel like. meant to be. 

***

“let’s go.”

jeongguk blinked his eyes open and his eyes focused on yoongi, standing in front of him, arm extended, two bottles of water clutched to his chest. “what?” he must’ve fallen asleep at some point.

the older arched a brow at him, expectantly. “did you think i was going to share you with them for the whole evening? no way. follow me.”

jeongguk let yoongi pull him up from the couch and followed after him, out of the front door and up the stairs. “where are we going?”

yoongi glanced at him over his shoulder and smiled.“you’ll see.”

they got to the top floor and jeongguk was hit with the flow of cool air when yoongi opened the door on the far end of the corridor. “to the roof, hyung? really?”

“just—” yoongi tugged him forward by his healthy arm. “trust me.”

jeongguk stepped on the rooftop after yoongi, but stopped right outside of the door, closing his eyes and breathing in the fresh air. the night air was chilly, but he liked it. cleared his still half-asleep head a little.

“gguk-ah?” 

jeongguk opened his eyes to see the alpha standing there, blankets and a few pillows at his feet, looking at him, brow furrowed just a tiny bit, head tilted, like he was waiting for something, a little nervous. jeongguk’s reaction, maybe?

“we can go back inside if you want, i just thought this might be— nice? since we haven’t technically even had our first date?”

“hyung,” jeongguk rasped, voice breaking a little and leaped forward, closing the distance between them. “i love it, it’s perfect.”

yoongi just smiled at him, wrapping his hands around his waist and leaning forward to press a gentle kiss on his lips. “i’m happy that you like it.”

they sat down side by side and yoongi threw one of the blankets around jeongguk, overly careful not to accidentally touch his right arm and jeongguk couldn’t help but to let out a tiny laugh. “hyung, i’m not gonna break. it’s okay, it doesn’t even hurt anymore.”

“as long as you have that thing on, you’re not okay,” yoongi grumbled, eyeing the sling, but his lips twitched into a tiny smile, still. “i’m gonna keep taking care of you and there’s nothing you can do about it.”

jeongguk smiled back at him and moved a little closer so he could lean his head on yoongi’s shoulder. “i think i’m fine with that.”

they sat in silence for a while, just enjoying being here, together, away from the hustle downstairs, away from the world. it had been a long time since jeongguk had felt this kind of peace. the lightness in his chest, like it was a little easier to breath, and not just because of the fresh air. 

he’d spent such a long time just surviving. without an end goal in sight, he’d just been going forward, trying to make it through another day, another month, another year. he’d never had a clear destination in his mind. and he didn’t have one now, either. but the difference was, he realized, that now he wasn’t surviving. right at this moment, he wasn’t just trying to keep his head above the water. he was floating. he was free.

he still wasn’t sure where he was going. but now he had someone to share the journey with. 

“hyung,” jeongguk mumbled, tilting his head so he could gently nose at the juncture between the alpha’s neck and shoulder. 

“hmm?” yoongi turned to him, drawing him closer, guiding his movements gently to help jeongguk into his lap. 

“i’m happy.” jeongguk kept his eyes down, suddenly feeling shy for some reason. this newfound peace was kind of overwhelming. he’d never been truly comfortable to just be . to accept himself, his status, his wolf, his past, his present. it felt good. but it was a lot to realize at once. he sighed, searching for the words, twirling his fingers into the hem of yoongi’s sweater. “it’s new for me. i mean, of course i’ve been happy these past months, after finding you and the guys, but. this is. different?”

“i know what you mean,” yoongi hummed and jeongguk felt soft lips grazing against his temple. “i feel it too. it feels lighter. like somehow, right now, all the pieces are in their right places. like this is how it’s supposed to be.”

“yeah,” jeongguk huffed out, glancing up, his eyes finding yoongi’s. “this feels right.”

yoongi raised his hands to cup his cheeks gently, looking straight into his eyes. they stayed like that for a moment, just getting lost into each other, until jeongguk couldn’t take it anymore, and with a sigh, he leaned forward to crash their lips together. 

one of the things jeongguk liked about yoongi the most was their communication. the alpha was always so gentle with him, not pushing too much but just enough to give jeongguk the courage to get the words out. he felt safe, he felt like he could be honest, even at times when he didn’t even know what he was feeling. yoongi was always there to help him stitch the words together. 

but right now, here on this rooftop under the beautiful starry sky, they didn’t need words. jeongguk could feel it. it was in the way yoongi held him, one hand on the small of his back, supporting him, the other cupping his jaw, moving to the back of his neck to press jeongguk even closer. it was in the way yoongi’s eyes were looking at his in between kisses, filled with so much feeling it was a little hard for jeongguk to hold the alpha’s gaze. it was in the way yoongi’s scent filled the air around them, happiness settling inside jeongguk’s chest, his omega purring, almost drunk on the feeling. it was in the way yoongi’s lips traveled from his neck to his jawline, the touch so soft, so gentle, but it made jeongguk feel like his skin was on fire. it was in the way their lips connected again, yoongi pulling jeongguk even closer, kissing him harder and harder, like he was trying to pour everything into that one kiss.

i love you. i’m here, you’re safe and i love you.

and jeongguk took all of his love and gave him all he had in exchange. jeongguk had found his purpose. he had found his home, his heart, a place where he belonged. yoongi was his and he was yoongi’s. there were so many words inside of him, everything he wanted to tell the other, but just as jeongguk knew, so did yoongi. 

i love you. i love all of you, i love all of us and one day, i’ll learn to love all of me. i’m here. i trust you. and i’m gonna stay.