Archive of Our Own ^beta

“I never forget to drink beer.”

Elsa Bennet-Darcy looked across the counter at Marianne Dashwood. “That’s what he said?”

Marianne looked down at her phone before nodding. “Yeah, that’s what he said.”

“Let me see.”

Marianne handed the phone to the brunette. “I asked him why he bailed on me last night.”

Elsa looked at the messages on her friend’s phone and then handed it back. “And you haven’t replied yet?”

“I don’t know what to say.”

“You could ask if he sent that to the wrong number or if ‘drink beer’ is supposed to have another meaning.”

Marianne sighed. “I could. But Elsa, this isn’t the first time that he’s done this.”

“It’s not the first time that he’s told you that he never forgets to drink beer?”

A smile flickered across Marianne’s face for the first time since she came scrambling into the Knit Wit. “Elsa, you know what I’m trying to say. It’s so not the first time that he’s stood me up or bailed on me or whatever.”

“I know.”

“I’m tired of this. Ed doesn’t do this to Nora. Your husband would never do this to you. Why can’t I get a guy like that?”

Elsa leaned forward resting her arms on the wooden counter. “Mari, can I be honest?”

“Okay.”

“You could. But you’re going to have to ditch Grant for that to happen.”

“But I hate being single.”

“And you hate the way that Grant treats you. If you want to find someone who treats you the way that you deserve to be treated, you’re going to have to suffer being single for at least a little bit.”

Marianne pouted. “I hate being single.”

“Mari, you can do it. I promise.”

“You promise?”

“Well, I can’t drink with you when you’re upset, but I know people who can. And I’m more than happy to listen to you vent.”

Marianne smiled faintly. “I’m just going to text him back and tell him that I never want to see him again.”

“You’re not going to call him at least?”

“Why should I call him? He doesn’t respect me enough to see me when we’ve agreed to see each other. I’m not going to show him the courtesy of actually making verbal contact with him.”

Elsa smiled before coming around the counter and hugging her friend. “Mari, you’re wonderful. And you’re going to get through this. It might suck, but you will get through this.”

Marianne didn’t mention Grant to Elsa again after that Saturday morning. She grumbled a bit about being single again and mused about joining an online dating site. But for the most part, she seemed calmer than her friends had seen her in a long while. And so, April blossomed into May. The weather began to get warmer. And when Grant Willoughby burst back into Elsa’s thoughts, she was in the middle of decorating tulip cookies while listening to Annie rant about wedding planning.

“And my sister won’t tell me whether or not she’s bringing a date.”

“Which sister?”

“Actually both of them,” Annie sighed. “I know that Mara is on-again, off-again with someone but she won’t tell me if she’s bringing him. And Lillie keeps saying that she might but she’s not sure. My wedding is in three days. I had to give a final number to the caterer last week. But I still might end up with two more people than I planned for because my sisters are absurd.”

“Your sisters make my sisters look like-“ Elsa began.

Annie never found out what her sisters made Elsa’s look like because Katy More-Land came rushing from the cash register. “Elsa, I need you. Or Annie, one of you; I need one of you.”

Elsa set down the yellow frosting on the prep table. “I’ll get it. Annie, just tell your sisters to go fly a kite.”

Annie smiled as her business partner bustled away.

Elsa followed Katy to the counter as her employee tried to explain what was wrong. “There’s a man who is looking for Marianne. He seems really agitated, and he’s making me uncomfortable.”

She squeezed the normally vivacious college student’s shoulder. “It’ll be fine. I think I know what this is about.”

“That’s him,” Katy said in a shaky voice as she pointed to a tall muscular man who was pacing in front of the counter. “He’s very handsome. But he seems angry.”

Elsa smirked before collecting herself and speaking. “Can I help you?”

“Yeah, where’s Marianne?”

“Marianne Dashwood?”

“Obviously,” he droned.

“Well, she works at the shop next door,” Elsa replied crisply.

He sighed. “Yeah, I went there. She wasn’t there.”

“Well, I don’t know where else she would be at ten-thirty on a Wednesday morning.”

“That’s what the old woman in the shop said.”

“Well, if Marianne’s mom can’t help you, neither can I. I’m sorry.”

He sighed. “Look. I’m Marianne’s boyfriend.”

“Are you?”

“Well, I haven’t seen her in a while, but I’m her boyfriend. And I just need to talk to her.”

Elsa shrugged. “I’m sorry. I can’t help you.”

“I just need to explain something to her. I have to tell her what happened.”

“I can’t help you. I’m sorry.”

Grant, who had never bothered to introduce himself to Elsa, pressed his hands on the counter and leaned forward. “I don’t think you understand. I’m her boyfriend. Something went wrong between us. I have to explain it to her.”

“And I don’t think that you understand. I own the business next to the one owned by Marianne’s family. I can’t help you fix your relationship problems.”

He sighed. “You’re her friend. I know that. You have to help me. I’m her boyfriend.”

“You keep telling me that, but I don’t believe you. And I don’t have to help you. I’m not the one who NEVER forgets to drink beer BUT does forget to go on a date with a woman whose boyfriend he calls himself. That’s you, not me. I don’t have to help you.”

“What?”

“You’re right that I’m her friend, but you’re wrong about being her boyfriend. She’s done with you. She told you that herself.”

“In a text message, she said that in a fucking text message.”

“Well, that’s all that she felt that she owed someone who left her sitting and waiting for him at Tres Hermanitas the night before and got her into a car accident that broke her leg on New Year’s Eve and missed her sister’s birthday party back in December and I could keep going if you like.”

“It’s complicated,” he insisted.

“No, it’s really not. You thought it was, but it’s actually quite simple. You used her, and she put up with it for a while. But she doesn’t want to anymore. And that’s fine. And it’s simple, Grant. She’s done with you.”

“But!” he sputtered.

“Do you want a cup of coffee or maybe a pastry? I could sell you a book. Otherwise, the door is that way.”

He sighed as he turned to leave. “Fine, whatever, I’ll get her back.”

Elsa rolled her eyes. “Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.”

An hour later, Marianne hurried into the café where she found Katy at the counter. “Is Elsa around?”

“Yeah,” Katy replied looking around. “I think she’s in the back with Annie. She’s baking maybe?”

Marianne pursed her lips. “Could you please get her? I need to talk to her for a minute.”

“Fine,” the younger woman huffed. “People keep interrupting her today. She does have work to do.”

“I won’t take much of her time.”

Katy wordlessly went to the café’s kitchen. She appeared a few moments later with Elsa who was wiping her hands on her floral apron as she walked.

“Now,” Marianne began. “I know that I’m distracting you from getting actual work done.”

Elsa waved a hand. “It’s not a big deal. I have time for you.”

“I just wanted to thank you for dealing with Grant.”

“Oh, that wasn’t a big deal.”

“It was to me,” Marianne said. “I was in the middle of processing a shipment when he stopped in at my shop, so I really couldn’t talk to him. And then, apparently you put him in his place.”

“I just told him the truth. I said that you were done with him.”

Marianne smiled. “Yeah, he sent me a pretty angry text about my ‘psycho friend’ who doesn’t understand our relationship.”

“Well, I’m happy to be your psycho friend as needed.”

“Actually I tried to channel you a bit, and I told him that he is the one who doesn’t understand our relationship. And then I said that we don’t have a relationship anymore.”

“Well done,” Elsa told her with a smile. “How did he take that?”

“He just said that I’ll miss him but he’ll be there when I come to my senses.”

“Did you reply?”

Marianne shook her head. “Nope.”

“That’s my girl.”

“I’m pretty sure that he’s got at least two other girlfriends in Mansfield. He doesn’t really need me, and I definitely don’t need him.”

Three days later, Marianne was in the basement of St. Martha’s Catholic Church helping Annie’s bridesmaids get ready. “This is a good day,” Elsa commented as Marianne worked on her hair.

Marianne smiled. “It’s a great day.”

“Although it should have happened about nine years ago,” the dark-haired maid of honor commented.

“I don’t know,” Marianne mused as she pinned another lock of hair into place. “It was horrible when they broke up or whatever you call that in college, but I think that their relationship is better now than it would have been then.”

Elsa nodded. “You’re right about that.”

“I mean,” Marianne continued. “It would have been nice if they’d gotten married then, but in a weird way, this is better. Don’t get me wrong; the way things ended between them and then the seven years that they were apart were horrible.”

“But this result is better,” Elsa concluded for her.

“Exactly, they have a better relationship now then they would have had otherwise.”

“You’re right.”

Marianne shrugged as she finished Elsa’s hair. “I want a relationship like theirs. I want…I want to be with someone who give me that sense of calm that they always seem to have when they’re together.”

“I hope you find that soon. I really do.”

“Close your eyes and put your hands over your eyes. And keep your mouth shut.”

Elsa complied, and Marianne liberally sprayed hairspray over Elsa’s head.

“Shit,” Marianne said.

“What?”

“That’s not bad for the baby, is it?”

Elsa laughed. “I think we’ll be okay. After all, eighties kids turned out fine, right?”

Marianne went upstairs after styling four bridesmaids’ hair and found the best man playing with the flower girl. “I hate to interrupt, Chris, but I’m supposed to do her hair.”

Chris Brandon picked up five-year-old Josie Kingsleigh. “What do you say, Miss Josie? Can I pass you off to Miss Dashwood so that she can do your hair?”

Josie shook her dark brown curls. “My hair is done. See? It’s all growing out of my head! I’m not bald like Grandpa.”

Chris’s face lit up with one of his rare full smiles. “Josie, we know that you aren’t bald. But Miss Dashwood is going to pin your hair up so that it doesn’t fall in your eyes while you’re walking down the aisle. Can you go downstairs with her so she can do that?”

“But Uncle Chris, I want to play with you.”

He looked her in the eye. “Josie-posy, I’ll play with you later, but right now, I need you to go with Miss Dashwood. Okay?”

“I don’t know,” she began.

“Hey, Josie,” Marianne tried. “Do you want to wear your pretty flower crown?”

“Yes!”

“Well, I have to play with your hair just a little before you can wear it. Do you think that we could go do that now?”

“And then we can come back upstairs and show Uncle Chris?”

Marianne smiled. “Absolutely.”

Josie grinned. “Okay, let’s go.”

Chris put the flower girl down, and she immediately headed down the basement stairs.

Marianne shrugged. “I guess I better get down there right away.”

“I guess,” Chris replied.

“Thanks for your help.”

Half an hour later, Marianne took Josie back upstairs to show her hair and crown to an appropriately appreciative Chris Brandon. Marianne found herself studying Chris as he crouched talking to the five year old. She supposed that he would be considered tall. He towered over her, but then again everyone towered over her and her sister. He was well-built and had a full head of thick dark brown hair. And damn but that man could wear a suit. She didn’t know when the last time that she’d seen him in a suit was (probably her dad’s funeral three years earlier), but he looked excellent in his dark gray suit. She was using to seeing him in jeans and a dress shirt or plain t-shirt; he wasn’t much for dressing up in her experience. But she might prefer it if he was.

“Marianne?” Chris’s level voice burst into her appreciative thoughts.

“Oh, yeah?” she started.

“It’s quarter to one,” he replied. “I need to go check on Erik, and you should probably get Miss Josie back downstairs. It’s almost show time.”

She smiled. “Okay, come with me, Josie. Chris, I’ll see you later.”

“Maybe at the reception,” he said with a smirk. “I doubt anyone will see anything other than Annie and Erik’s smile.”

The wedding was beautiful. Nora and Ed, Alice and Will, and Emma and George each walked down the aisle in their turn. The bridesmaids wore cornflower blue dresses and carried daises while the groomsmen wore gray suits with blue ties. The maid of honor and best man were about to follow Emma and George down the aisle when the flower girl was heard to loudly declare that “No, I’m not going alone. I need to go WITH someone.”

The organist continued playing, and the ensuing discussion couldn’t be heard over the music. But Marianne wasn’t surprised when Chris walked down the aisle with Elsa on his left arm and Josie holding his left hand. At the front of the church, Josie let go over Chris’s hand and ran to her mother.

And then the music changed from Love Divine, All Loves Excelling to For the Beauty of the Earth, and Annie walked down the aisle on Thomas Bennett’s arm. Annie decided that she didn’t want her father to walk her down the aisle as she’d never been close to her dad and had in fact barely spoken to the man in the past ten years. But since she’d spent every holiday of the past ten years with Thomas and Mary Frances Bennett’s family and they were the first people outside her peer group from whom she sought guidance she wanted Thomas to walk her down the aisle. Thomas responded by refusing to let her pay one cent for her wedding reception, which was being held at the Longbourn hotel because “that’s what we do for our daughters.”

The reception was lovely. It was in a beautiful room with great views of the sunset and the lake. But after dinner, toasts, and the first dance, Marianne felt a bit down. Her friends were all dancing with their significant others. Her mom was talking with her friends. Her younger brother was spinning Camilla Bennet around the dance floor. She had no one to dance with, so she took her glass of wine and went out to the porch.

The long back porch of the Longbourn had a wonderful view of the hotel’s lawn and Lake Michigan. Standing by the railing, Marianne could see people wandering the lawn and boats on the lake. She could hear indistinct chatter. She wasn’t completely alone, but she was able to mull through her thoughts.

She didn’t know how long she’d been standing there looking out at the lake in silence when a voice broke into her thoughts. “I’m not interrupting you, am I?”

She turned around to see Chris Brandon standing near the steps to the lawn with a rocks glass in hand. She shook her head awkwardly. “No, oh, no, you’re fine. You’re fine.”

“Are you alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. I’m just thinking.”

“About anything in particular?”

Marianne leaned against the pillar of the porch railing. “You don’t want to hear this, Chris.”

He shrugged. “I don’t know. I’m here, aren’t I? What’s bothering you?”

“Do you remember what the last wedding we were all here for was?”

“Will and Elsa.”

“And you remember what happened later that night?”

He took a step toward her. “Marianne, please tell me that you are not still beating yourself up about that car accident. It wasn’t your fault.”

She sighed slowly. “Everyone says that. You, my mom, Nora, Ed, everyone, but I didn’t have to get in that car. I didn’t have to leave the wedding early and go to a party with Grant. I told Nora that the reception was boring and I was going to go hang out with Grant because he was more fun.”

“He was your boyfriend.”

“My boyfriend who was such a good boyfriend that he didn’t come to that wedding with me,” she spat bitterly. “I RSVPed that he would come, and he didn’t. He made me look like a fool, and I let him. And then, I left a wedding reception that wasn’t actually boring to go to a stupid party with him. And what happened? He got drunk and then decided that he wanted to drive to another party. And I got in that car with him. I knew he was drunk, Chris, and I got in that car anyway. And we all know how that turned out.”

Chris pressed his lips together before speaking. “I don’t think that you can blame yourself for what happened.”

“He could have killed me. He was charged with drunk driving. And I didn’t have the good sense to end things with him.”

“Hey, the way I heard things, you broke it off with him last month. Maybe you weren’t ready to leave him in January, but you’re not with him anymore.”

“Stop defending me to me,” she sighed before taking a big gulp of wine.

He put a hand on her shoulder. “Marianne, we all make mistakes.”

“Mine were really dumb mistakes.”

“Whose wedding are we at today?”

She snorted. “You have a point.”

“Or I could point out that you’re talking to the guy who really thought that he could win back his ex-girlfriend who left him for his brother after she and his brother got divorced.”

“How did that work out for you?”

He shrugged. “She didn’t take me back, and then she died for unrelated reasons. And then my brother died. And then my mom ended up raising their daughter.”

“I didn’t know that.”

“What?”

“I didn’t know that your girlfriend left you for your brother. You and Ed must have great talks.”

He laughed bitterly. “They were slightly different situations, but there are similarities.”

Marianne leaned back. She hadn’t spent much time alone with Chris Brandon or ever been this close to him. She’d never noticed that his entire face was covered in freckles; it wasn’t a smattering here or just a splash on his nose. His entire face was freckled from his hairline to his chin. She took another sip of wine before speaking. “Chris?”

“Yeah?”

“How old are you?”

“You’re the one who is always calling me old.”

She took a sip of wine hoping to hide her blushing cheeks. “I know. But I’m realizing that I know that you’re older than Erik or George, but I don’t know how old you are. But I know that in high school my brother broke a track record that you’d set twenty years earlier.”

He smiled his casual half-smile. “So I have to be old?”

“Well, George is five years older than I am, and he’s thirty-four.”

“I’m forty-one.”

She thought for a minute. “So you’re twelve years older than I am? No, wait. I’m going to be thirty this summer. That makes you eleven years older than me, right?”

He nodded. “Yeah, my birthday came and went already.”

“We didn’t do anything.”

Chris chuckled and shook his head. “Marianne, you’ve pretty actively avoided spending time with me for the past few years.”

“And now I don’t know why.”

“The explanation I’ve always heard,” he began.

“I know what I’ve said. But I think that there are a lot of things that I’ve been wrong about. I’ve made fun of Nora and Elsa for a lot of things for a long time, but I think that maybe they were right all along.”

“This feels a little sudden.”

“I’ve been thinking a lot lately especially since the accident. There has to be a reason why Elsa and Annie are married to really good solid men and my sister is dating another one while I let Grant play with me for eight worthless years.”

“Marianne, finish that glass of wine, and let your worries go for one evening. We’re going to dance together and not worry about the past.”

She smiled. “That sounds great.”

Marianne fairly quickly learned that dancing with Chris Brandon would have been much easier before she realized how good he looked in a suit or found herself fascinated by his freckles. He was quite a bit taller than her, and his arms were unsurprisingly strong. She felt a bit insecure about his hand resting on the less than perfect softness of her hips and midsection. But he wasn’t saying anything about that. He was just smiling as they danced. “Penny for your thoughts?” he offered.

She shook her head. She wasn’t about to say I was just thinking about how stunningly good-looking you are. “Nothing really, I guess. I’m just happy to be here.”

“Do you like weddings?”

“I guess? I want to get married. I want to have a wedding of my own.”

“But?” he prompted gently.

“This might sound terrible, but I’m tired of going to weddings alone.”

“Grant didn’t go to weddings?”

She laughed bitterly. “Grant only went to parties when he wanted to. Do you know how many parties I’ve skipped over the years because he didn’t want to go to them?”

“A few, I’d guess.”

“I left my sister’s birthday party after an hour last year for him. I didn’t go to Elsa’s party last year.” She shook her head. “I was an idiot.”

“Word of advice,” Chris replied. “Beating yourself up over what you did in the past does you no good.”

“But I did some really dumb things.”

“Everyone has, Marianne. The point isn’t that you dwell on them. You have to grow from them.”

She pursed her lips. “Is that like how Elsa likes to say that you should think of the past only as it gives you pleasure?”

He smiled. “Exactly.”

“I’m not good at that,” Marianne replied.

“I don’t think that it’s something that comes naturally to anyone,” Chris said. ”I think it’s something that you learn to do by practice and sometimes by forcing yourself.”

“How is Elsa so good at it then?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know. You’d have to ask her that.”

After the song ended, Marianne and Chris made their way over to where several of their friends were standing around chatting. Marianne wordlessly leaned her head against her sister’s shoulder, and Nora wrapped an arm around her sister’s shoulders and rested her head against Marianne’s.

“Sisters,” Will Darcy sang.

“Sisters,” Ed sang.

Will looked at his cousin and continued. “There were never such devoted sisters.”

“I think that you have the wrong sisters,” Nora quipped. “The such devoted sisters are really Elsa and Gwen.”

“Right,” Ed replied. “Where’s Gwen?”

“She and Charlie left a little bit again,” Elsa answered.

“Why? It’s just barely nine.”

“Charlie’s sisters are coming to visit tomorrow, and they need to get ready.”

Ed made a face. “That sounds awful.”

“Gwen wants to clean the house before Caroline comes over.”

“If I was related to Caroline,” Marianne began.

“Which technically Gwen isn’t yet,” Ed inserted.

Elsa shook her head. “Your commitment to their relationship not working out baffles me.”

Ed shrugged nonchalantly. “I don’t understand wanting to be with someone who let his sisters convince him that you don’t love him and you were using him for his money.”

“She says that he apologized.”

Ed rolled his eyes wordlessly.

“Anyway,” Marianne resumed. “If I was related to Caroline or living with someone who was related to her, I wouldn’t invite her to stay in my house. I would encourage her to stay in a hotel if she insisted on visiting me. It’s what we do with Jack and Anne.”

Elsa smiled. “Mari, if you were related to Caroline, you’d avoid her forever.”

“Hey, I interact with Jack and Anne!”

“Only because Mom makes you,” Nora replied.

“But I still do it. I don’t know if I’d interact with Caroline even if someone tried to force me. Jack and Anne might not be my favorite people, but they’ve never actively done something to hurt me or keep me from something or someone that’s good for me.”

Ed pointed at Marianne. “And that, Elspeth, is why I don’t like Caroline. My sister is very different from me, and I find her frustrating often. She can be extremely selfish. But she doesn’t intentionally do things to hurt me.”

Elsa nodded. “Okay, that’s a fair point, Ed. And Marianne, I like the way that you said that.”

“Basically, Gwen and Charlie are nicer than any of us,” Nora concluded.

“Yeah,” Elsa sighed. “I’ve been hearing that my entire life. Why can’t you be more like your sister? Your sister is so sweet and kind. Your sister would never do something like that.”

“You weren’t a bad kid,” Nora said.

“Yeah, but she didn’t talk back or disagree with people. She just went with the flow. I asked a lot of questions, and there were issues with my timing and tone a lot of the time.”

“But then you were the one who was engaged for exactly a year, set a wedding date within a week of getting engaged, and got pregnant almost right away,” Will commented. “I think that pushed you pretty solidly back into the Great Mary Frances’s good graces.”

“Yeah, didn’t your mom recently tell Gwen that normal people plan a wedding after they get engaged?” Ed queried.

“She tells her that all the time,” Will replied. “Gwen just tells her that they’re enjoying being engaged and they’ll get married when they’re ready.”

“And how does the Great Mary Frances handle that?”

Elsa snorted. “My mother always says the same thing. When I was young, getting engaged meant that you were getting married in the near future, before your mother died of old age.”

Nora sighed. “They’ll get married when they get married.”

“Bingo,” Elsa replied. “There’s zero point in fussing about it. They’ll do it when they’re ready.”

“I wouldn’t want to be engaged forever,” Marianne began.

“But you’d never date Charlie either,” her sister inserted.

“True; maybe they don’t really want to get married.”

Elsa shrugged. “I don’t know. I feel like Gwen has always wanted to get married.”

“I think that it’s more of an issue on Charlie’s end,” Will said. “But it’s not really worth us discussing it. They’re going to do what they’re going to do.”

“Truth,” Chris said in a final tone.

“So,” Nora said to her sister when the two of them were getting drinks from the bar. “Chris?”

“I went out on the porch because I felt really alone, and he came outside.”

“Was he looking for you?”

Marianne shrugged. “I don’t think so. I think that he just wanted to be alone. But we talked.”

“Oh, you talked to the old man?” Nora teased.

“I know what I've said about him, but Nora, he’s nice.”

“I know. I’ve been friends with him for a while.”

Marianne sighed. “But I didn’t know. And I liked talked to him. It was nice. I think that I want to get to know him.”

“He’s a good man, Mari.”

“Are you warning me?”

Nora shook her head. “Not really; I’m more thinking that he is the kind of man that you’re looking for.”

“Look at you. I mention thinking that I want to get to know him, and you immediately start thinking about a relationship.”

“Well, I learned that art from my sister.”

Marianne stuck her tongue out at her sister.

“What?” Nora replied. “He’s not the type to tell you that he never forgets to drink beer.”