Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It was impossible not to smile at the sight in front of her. Oliver Queen was out on the dance floor, spinning around with the sweetest little dance partner, neither of them having a care in the world. Nyssa’s niece Jacey was clearly smitten with Oliver ever since he’d had to carry her down the aisle at the wedding, since the poor girl was too shy to handle her flower girl duties alone. She’d been attached to Oliver’s hip the whole day, barely letting him take a step without taking her with him. And it was just as obvious that Oliver was entertaining himself by making her laugh.

He swung Jacey around in a circle like she weighed nothing, filling the room with her squeals of delight, before flinging her onto his hip again. He took one of her hands, rocking back and forth. And the whole time, her giggles echoed through the reception hall, carrying over the music. 

Felicity knew that she wasn’t the only woman in the room who couldn’t take her eyes off of Oliver. Not even close. In fact, he’d been turning heads ever since he walked in wearing his tux, looking like he’d just walked off the pages of a magazine. He always did. Which was half of the reason Felicity hated going out with their friends if she knew Oliver was going to be there. She’d seen him flirt. She’d seen him aim that charming smile at other women in the hopes of taking one home with him. And there was no denying that it made her feel sick.

But the way he danced with the little flower girl was just...adorable.

For some reason, he’d decided not to pursue any of the eager and willing bridesmaids today. 

Thank god for that.

“Is he your boyfriend?”

Felicity pulled her eyes away from Oliver, glancing at the woman who had taken the seat next to her at the table. Her face was familiar...one of Nyssa’s sisters for sure. She winced, feeling bad that she couldn’t remember her name. There were six or seven sisters, to be fair. It was hard to keep track. And she had never spent much time with any of them besides Nyssa. “Oliver?” Felicity smiled, shaking her head. “No, he’s not my boyfriend.”

The woman smiled back, looking pleased with that news. “That’s good. He was flirting with me before the ceremony earlier. I wouldn’t mind finding a coat closet with him later, if you know what I mean.”

As if it was possible to not know what she meant.

Raising her eyebrows, Felicity blinked at the woman’s blunt statement. Definitely a relative of Nyssa. Looking back at Oliver, that nauseous feeling was starting to bubble in her chest again, and yep...she still hated it. 

It was hard enough knowing about Oliver’s reputation when it came to her fellow women. She wasn’t exactly keen on watching it happen right in front of her face.

Felicity nodded anyway, hoping there wasn’t too much venom in her voice as she replied, “Well, he loves baseball. You get him talking about that, and you’ll pretty much have him wrapped around your finger for the rest of your life.”

The unnamed sister looked a little surprised to get the advice, but then she smiled, nodding appreciatively. “Noted. Thanks.”

Felicity stood up from the table, grabbing her purse and straightening her gown with her hands. She felt a little bit uncomfortable in the dress; a silky, backless, lavender number that was tighter than the clothes she’d usually pick for herself. It wasn’t really her style, but even she could see that it looked good on her. Sara would never subject her to an ugly bridesmaid dress. She was a better friend than that.

After making her way to the bar, Felicity picked a chair that left her back to Oliver, deciding it’d be better not to let herself get swept up in any crazy, senseless, romantic wedding-induced ideas. Seeing him being sweet and kind to a kid shouldn’t make her feel any type of way. 

It wasn’t what she wanted.

It wasn’t what he wanted.

It wasn’t what they did.

So it was better not poke the bear. Not tonight.

Sara and Nyssa had always known how to throw a party, and Felicity wasn’t the least bit surprised that their wedding had the same flare. Luckily, she knew most of the guests, their mutual friends from college and Sara’s family, so she felt comfortable sipping her drink and chatting with various people that came and went from the bar while she sat there for a while.

And it didn’t take very long for Sara’s cousin Tim to finally approach her, pulling the chair close as he sat down beside her. 

Of course.

Felicity took a deep breath, fully aware that this conversation was going to come for her at some point during the day. That it would bite her in the ass eventually. Tim had hit on her at a holiday party the previous year. And at a family barbecue that Sara had dragged her to earlier that summer. He wasn’t a bad guy, just a little too stiff for her liking. Boring.

“Ms. Smoak,” Tim smiled, leaning uncomfortably close. “It’s nice to see you again.”

“Mr. Lance, nice to see you too,” she returned the smile, dreading the inevitable small talk. He seemed to think that striking up a conversation about the holiday decorations at the party last year meant that she was flirting with him. Or discussing the beautiful weather on that summer day at the cookout meant that she was interested in him. He mistook her politeness for an attraction. And that irritated her to no end.

“I couldn’t believe Sara wanted you in her wedding once I saw you up there today. You looked great. Bit of a show stealer, aren’t you?”

Felicity winced. Because that’s not a weird and rude thing to say about your cousin on her wedding day. And exactly the kind of thing that turned her off to him, despite the fact that he was quite handsome. She wasn’t opposed to a one night stand if the opportunity presented itself, but Felicity couldn’t even muster up a single fuck for the guy. Literally.

“Ah, well, thank you.”

Tim stayed next to her for a while, catching up while they finished their drinks. Felicity didn’t mind too much, since he mostly loved to talk about himself. Whether she was interested in listening or not, he didn’t seem to notice. Tim was also an accountant, and she could easily nod and hum her way through the conversation, pretending to be invested in his stories while he pretended he needed to lean in as close as he possibly could in order for her to hear him.

The music wasn’t that loud.

Felicity tried not to roll her eyes.

Eventually, thankfully, he got up to leave. But not without reminding her that she had his phone number and he’d be in town all weekend.

Felicity relaxed as he got up, knowing he’d probably have better luck with one of the Raatko sisters. Or he’d just get drunk and fall asleep somewhere, like he’d done at the barbecue.

Before she could even turn her head to make sure that Tim was really gone, she felt someone behind her. Felicity stiffened, uncomfortable with the sudden proximity of the man while he reached around her, waving to get the bartender’s attention. 

Personal space, much?

After a moment, she sighed, relaxing when she recognized the hand that came to rest on the counter in front of her. Suddenly, the presence on her back was a familiar one, and Felicity welcomed the warmth of his chest hovering just behind her bare skin. 

The bartender nodded in their direction. “Whiskey, neat,” Oliver ordered. “And another glass of wine for this gorgeous girl, please.”

Even as she scoffed at him, Felicity practically melted. It was just the solace of someone who she knew and liked, who didn’t require forced smiles and chit chat. He was her friend. She didn’t have to worry about holding a polite conversation when it came to him. And it was a nice change after spending most of the wedding reception doing exactly that with all of Nyssa and Sara’s friends and family. 

She felt him lean further over her shoulder, his lips dropping to her ear. “What are you doing talking to Dim?”

Felicity tilted her head, making sure he could see her narrowed eyes. “Don’t be mean.”

“What?” Oliver smirked, feigning innocence. “Sara and I have been calling him Dim since we were in middle school. Poor guy doesn’t have an adventurous bone in his body. He’s the most dull guy you’ve ever met and you know it.” 

She frowned, feeling defensive even though she knew that he was right. “He’s not dull.” Oliver answered that with one look. And Felicity sighed, “Fine, yes, he’s dull. Very, very, dull.”

Taking a sip of his drink, Oliver kept his voice casual as he asked, “I take that to mean you didn’t sleep with him? Or you did, and found out he’s a snooze in bed, too?”

Felicity’s mouth popped open, a flush rising on her cheeks. “That’s none of your business.”

He shrugged, setting his drink down as he leaned in closer, his nose inches away from hers. “So you did screw him? I have to say, that’s a little disappointing. But if mediocre sex is what you’re into...”

“I didn’t sleep with him!” Felicity shoved him off.

“Well, would you give him a chance? Is he the kind of guy that can hold your attention, Felicity?”

Seeing the curiosity in his eyes, masked behind a teasing smirk, Felicity decided to play along. “He’s not a bad option for wedding sex, is he? As you know, I don’t mind doing all the work. So what does it matter if he’s boring in bed?”

With a snort, Oliver moved to sit in the chair Tim had just been occupying. And what a difference in energy it was. Tim’s closeness had made her skin crawl. Oliver’s closeness made her skin ignite.

“You can do better. Even for a one night stand,” Oliver mumbled into his glass.

Her thoughts exactly.

“I don’t think one night stands and standards are two things that really go together,” she pointed out. He pinched his lips shut, his eyes searching hers for a brief moment. Felicity’s heart instantly sped up. She knew that look. She loved that look just as much as she hated it. Craved his attention as much as she feared it.

“Anyway,” Felicity huffed. “What about you?” It would be safer, and in both their best interests, to change the subject before he had a chance to continue discussing her sex life. Not that she really wanted to talk about his , either. “One of Nyssa’s sisters seems interested in you.”

Oliver glanced over his shoulder, murmuring back, “Which one?”

Slapping his arm, Felicity laughed. “How many of them have you been flirting with!?”

He shrugged, “Just Talia. I don’t think it’s going anywhere, though.”

“Why not?”

He looked at her, his eyes dropping down her body before locking with hers. “You know why. I’m having a hard time taking my eye off someone else.”

She shook her head. “I thought we agreed…”

“ You agreed,” Oliver corrected, knocking the rest of his drink back in one gulp.

Felicity closed her eyes, giving her head a slight shake. “We both said that it wasn’t a good idea anymore.”

“Well that was before I saw you in this damn dress,” Oliver grumbled back. He rested his elbow on the counter, leaning his head on his palm as he turned to face her. “Really, Felicity, tell me what’s so different about tonight than any other night we’ve shared in the last three months.”

Felicity opened her mouth, then closed it, struggling to find the words to explain it. “I—I don’t know. Weddings are just...more intimate. Romantic.”

His lips twitched with a smile, “And you can’t handle the romance of a wedding and the absolute mind blowing orgasms I give you on the same night?”

She leveled him with a glare. “One of our best friends just promised to love her new wife for the rest of their lives. It’s meaningful and I care about them and it just...it’s emotional for me too, you know? Seeing Sara like this. Seeing her and Nyssa do this for real. So no, I don’t want to blur those lines tonight. And you shouldn’t either.”

“We’re not them, Felicity,” he answered calmly.

She felt her cheeks growing red, “I know we’re not, Oliver. We’re not...I’m not saying that we’re in love or anything. But I do care about you. And I care about our friendship. We’ve been doing a pretty decent job of compartmentalizing that from...the mind blowing orgasms we have whenever the mood strikes us. I just don’t want to ruin that by getting caught up in all the feelings that come with today. Okay?”

What they’d done in the past was...strictly physical.

Or so she told herself.

“Okay,” he sighed, standing up from the bar.

Part of Felicity died a little bit inside at how easily he accepted it. Part of her wanted him to fight a little bit harder. 

She kept her head down and her eyes on her drink as she waited for him to walk away. He still had time to find a bridesmaid or that sister to take home, after all.

So, it surprised Felicity when Oliver leaned in low, whispering in her ear. “Dance with me.”

Nodding, Felicity slipped her hand into his waiting one, unable to say no to the request. He led her onto the dance floor silently, finding room for them amongst the other guests. One of his arms wound around her waist, pulling her close. The other hand wrapped around hers, drawing it to his chest as he started to turn them in a slow circle.

Surprisingly, he wasn’t an awful dancer. They turned and turned, his feet guiding them with only the minor, expected clumsiness. After a moment, Felicity sighed, smiling as she tucked her head beneath his chin. 

She felt him press his cheek against her hair, “What’s so funny?” Oliver asked, apparently not missing the fact that she was smiling.

“You’re managing not to step on my toes. I’m just impressed.”

He simply hummed in response, his thumb grazing the small of her back, skin on skin. Felicity shivered, clinging closer.

“You know,” Oliver murmured, “I care about you, too. I know what you mean about weddings. Honestly, I do. We’ve hooked up a few times, Felicity...and I’m sorry if I’ve led you to believe that it doesn’t mean anything to me. It does.”

Felicity paused, stiffening for a brief moment before falling back in sync with the tiny circle they were moving in. She pulled her head back, wanting to see his face. “What do you mean?”

Oliver smiled down at her, his eyes softening. “Look, the truth is, I know we’re not like Sara and Nyssa, or Ronnie and Caitlin, or any of our other mutual friends who have gotten married in the last few years. I know that you and I aren’t going to end up like them. But ever since we slept together...the thing that I like most about it is that it’s just...easy. It’s you. And it’s me. And it’s—” he shrugged, glancing away. “I know our feelings for each other aren’t... that , but like you said, we care about each other. And I feel like it just—I don’t know, it makes the sex better , somehow?”

Felicity blinked at him, “Um, yeah, Oliver...that’s usually how it works.”

The years they’d known each other and the respect they held for one another provided a level of intimacy and comfort that made having sex with him...kind of addicting. It felt good. It felt safe. And it was hot as hell.

But that was all that it was. A really good, really nice, really hot, physical connection between two friends.

In truth, Felicity was just relieved that it didn’t ruin their friendship or change things. The first time they fell into bed together could have ended very differently had they let their emotions into bed with them, too. Or worse, if the sex had been bad.

She wasn’t sure she’d ever be able to look him in the eye again if they’d taken that risk just for a disappointing fuck.

“Well I didn’t know,” Oliver grumbled. “I’ve never—I’ve never had that before, okay?”

She raised an eyebrow, “I just assumed that you, um...haven’t you slept with your friends before?”

He huffed, either frustrated that she didn’t get it or annoyed that she was pointing out the truth. “Not—I mean, it’s not exactly the same thing. We’re good friends, Felicity. We’ve been friends for three years. You know pretty much everything about me. I’ve never been friends with a girl like I’m friends with you, let alone adding sex into the mix.”

“Which is why it’s a bad idea.”

“No,” Oliver quickly shook his head. “That’s not what I’m saying. It’s a good idea. Great idea. I’ve enjoyed it...immensely.” 

Felicity rolled her eyes, “You mean that you’ve never fucked a friend you cared about before?”

Oliver bit his lip, squeezing her hand as he answered quietly, “Not like I care about you.”

Felicity stared up at him, trying to understand this thing between them. But it was complicated. It had been complicated since they met their sophomore year of college when Sara introduced them. There was something that was natural, and if she was being honest, sexual, that has been there since the beginning. They’d just been ignoring it and trying to stay strictly friends for the last three years.

Which worked.

It did.

He was right. She knew everything about him. Everything that mattered. And he knew her just as well. Yet...that still didn’t take away from the attraction she felt for him. And that he felt for her.

They should’ve known it was only a matter of time until they had to deal with it.

“Oliver,” she breathed. “I know that we have to talk about this. Since we’re good friends , I don’t want to lose that. And this is starting to feel like we’re playing with fire.”

With a sigh, Oliver slid his hand up her back, his eyes darkening as he watched her shiver, as he saw the effect that he had on her body. “We’re not like our friends, Felicity. You and me are the same. We’re realists. We can be friends who care about each other, and we can be friends who screw each other senseless. I don’t see why we can’t have both.”

She narrowed her eyes at him, a little offended that he could see things so black and white. It definitely wasn’t that simple for her. She didn’t look at half of him and label it ‘friend,’ then look at the other half and label it ‘fuck buddy.’

“I’m sorry if I can’t compartmentalize things as effortlessly as you can.”

“Oh, come on, Felicity!” He chuckled, “We hate love. We suck at romance. We cringe at the idea of spending the rest of our lives with one person. And we’re incapable of commitment. We say it all the time! You’ve told me all of that plenty of times. That doesn’t just change because it’s me that you decide to sleep with...does it?”

Felicity shook her head, hissing back at him, “You’re twisting my words! I never said that I hate love, or that I never want to get married, or that I can’t commit to someone. Maybe I just haven’t found the right person yet.”

“Oh, please,” Oliver scoffed. “You’ve had at least three ‘Mr. Rights’ beg for your undying love since I’ve known you, and you wiggled your way out of those relationships as soon as it got serious. Every time. You push love away, just like I do.”

Frowning, Felicity took a step back from him. Oliver’s hand tightened for a moment, but then he let her go. “Is that really what you think of me?”

For some reason, that hurt.

And it hurt even worse to think that he thought of himself that way. Like they’re just two fucked up people who happened to get caught up in a moment or two. That the feelings would pass. Because they weren’t the kinds of people who could handle something serious.

Oliver’s eyebrows furrowed as he read the sadness in her eyes. He opened his mouth to answer, but then snapped it shut. Before he could find the words, the sound of a throat clearing behind him interrupted them.

Leaning around his shoulder, Felicity saw Nyssa’s sister, Talia; the one who asked her about Oliver and the one who he’d apparently been flirting with earlier. She offered a smile, her eyes on Oliver. “Mind if I cut in?”

Felicity crossed her arms, instantly feeling uncomfortable. They’d practically stopped dancing as their conversation grew serious, but it was still a bold move of her to ask.

Glancing up at Oliver, Felicity could tell that he was about to politely turn Talia down, so she quickly stepped away. “He’s all yours,” Felicity flashed a grin, letting it fall from her face as she tossed Oliver one final glare. 

She’d heard enough and he’s said enough, anyway.

And she didn’t really want to hear more about how he thought they were two emotionally unavailable people who decided to hook up with each other for convenience. In fact, she felt like an idiot for thinking that Oliver thought more of her than that. For thinking that he was just as confused as she was about the whole thing. About his feelings and what it all meant.

Of course, Oliver wasn’t lost like she was. He wasn’t pouring over every touch and every kiss, wondering if there was something more between them than they’d originally thought. 

He wasn’t aching for her. But she was aching for him.

That was her mistake.

They’d said that it was casual. So for him, it was casual.

End of story.

Leaving Oliver to enjoy his new dance partner and probably his next lay, Felicity nudged her way through the crowd until she reached the doors that led to a wide balcony overlooking the lake. The air outside was refreshing, the breeze was chilly that blew in from the lake straight ahead of her. 

There were a few guests socializing near the Adirondack chairs on the porch. Felicity smiled politely at them as she passed, crossing her arms and making her way to the corner of the balcony where she could be alone. Hidden from the windows, she took a moment to herself, catching a few deep breaths.

And she stood there for a while, the sun sinking low over the water, casting the sky in a deep orange color that was so easy to stare at. 

She leaned against the railing, rubbing her hands against the goosebumps that rose on her skin as she tried to clear her head.

“Hey...You hiding?”

Glancing over her shoulder, Felicity noticed Oliver standing behind her. Apparently he knew what was good for him, since he approached cautiously, shuffling his feet. 

“Yeah,” she huffed back. “I guess I am.”

“From me?”

Ignoring the question, because unlike him, she wasn’t one for brutal honesty, Felicity changed the subject. “That was a quick dance. Hope you didn’t leave Talia feeling unsatisfied.”

Oliver shoved his hands in his pockets, moving to stand beside her. “I’m sorry for what I said earlier. You were right. I put that stuff on you because it was how I felt and I liked thinking that you felt the same way. It’s just...I’ve seen you hurting, Felicity. I’ve seen you cry over idiots who never deserved a single tear from you. And I guess it just made me think that you and I were on the same page when it comes to shit like commitment and marriage.”

She rolled her eyes, still offended, and still feeling defensive. But mostly, she was upset to realize that those few times they’d ended up in bed together meant more to her than it did to him.

“So for the first time in your life, you had sex with someone who you can actually tolerate outside of the bedroom? You realized that you like having sex with the same girl more than once? So what? You’re acting like that’s some huge step for you Oliver, and that’s pretty sad.”

Big fucking deal.

“Okay,” Oliver nodded, giving her a timid smile. “I deserve that.”

She didn’t answer, keeping her eyes focused on the lake, directing her angry glare at the view instead of him.

“I sort of have an idea,” Oliver said, looking at her out of the corner of his eye. “You have to promise not to get mad. Well, more mad than you already are.”

She let out a sharp breath, crossing her arms tighter. 

Without a word, Oliver shrugged out of his jacket, stepping behind her and carefully putting it around her shoulders before he said anything else. “I think I want to try it,” he sighed. “The whole commitment thing.”

“Oh?” Felicity asked, feeling her heart sink. She tilted her face against her own shoulder, taking in a subtle, comforting breath of his cologne that lingered on his suit jacket. “Good for you. I’m sure the next girl to come along will appreciate the effort you put into not cheating on her, Oliver.”

He shook his head, “I don’t mean with the next girl that catches my eye, Felicity. I mean with you.”

She froze, blinking up at him.

He could not be serious.

“You’re saying you want to...like, date me?”

Oliver shifted on his feet, his hand reaching to scratch the back of his neck. “Well, I’m not sure I’m really comfortable with that term, but...I just—Felicity, you’re like, the only woman in my life that I could spend all my time with and never get tired of. Think of it more like, I don’t know, an experiment.”

She was shaking her head before he’d even finished speaking. “That sounds like a terrible idea.”

And a quick and easy way to get hurt.

Being Oliver, he didn’t back down from the argument that quickly. “How about one month? We can go out, and hang out like we always do, just without seeing other people. We agree to only ‘date’ each other. I’ve never truly done the whole monogamous thing. But it actually might be kind of fun...with you.” He bumped his hip against hers, “Come on, you’re the one who said you don’t have anything against romance. Let me see what all the fuss is about.”

“You’re insane,” she couldn’t help but laugh, feeling a bit flustered at the idea of it. Of dating Oliver Queen for a month. Acting like they were a couple for a month. Pretending. Because he wasn’t proposing that they actually give it a shot for the two of them. He was proposing that she be his trial run to see if he was ready for a real relationship.

It sounded like a recipe for disaster. “I’m not really interested in being the guinea pig in that experiment , Oliver. Besides, I don’t think you’re capable of monogamy.”

“Ouch,” Oliver pressed his palm to his chest, feigning injury, but he smiled. “I mean, so what? That’s the point, right? We’d still be friends. You wouldn’t really be my girlfriend. So no drama if I slip up.”

Felicity cocked her head to the side, poking her finger into his chest, “Hell no. That’s not how this would go. If I were to agree to this, which I’m not, then you would have to commit to the commitment. That’s the point, right? So, if you ‘slip up,’ then I get to be pissed at you.” 

Oliver frowned, thinking about it, and clearly not liking the sound of it. “You know I hate when you’re mad at me.”

“I know,” Felicity smirked. “Doesn’t sound like such a fun experiment now, does it?”

“No, I still want to,” he shrugged, making her smug smile falter. “Why not? We’re already friends. We already have sex—”

“ Had sex,” Felicity corrected, pinning him with a glare. “Your little analysis of me took that right off the table.”

Oliver leaned in, grinning as he slowly brushed a stray piece of hair out of her face. “But you liked it when I fucked you on the table just the other night,” he whispered, his voice low. Seductive. “So should we really be taking anything off the table?”

She closed her eyes, her lips parting as her breath caught in her throat. Felicity waited for him to close the distance, his words instantly sending a rush of heat to her core. The anticipation of his hot, hungry kiss was almost too much. But when it didn’t come, Felicity had to bite her lip to stop herself from whining.

“That wasn’t the last time I’ll be between your legs, Felicity. You know that.” He spoke with such certainty that it almost made her wish she could believe it. And the confidence behind his words, unapologetic of how much he wanted her, was definitely turning her on.

Keeping her teeth clenched, Felicity forced herself not to ask the question that popped into her head.

Do you promise?

“We can’t keep this up forever, Oliver,” she sighed. “ The sex, the friendship, and the way we avoid the rest. We’re flirting with disaster.” Lifting her chin, she met his eyes. “So...I’ll do this on one condition,” she spoke slowly, certain that she knew exactly how to make him drop this subject entirely and forget about this stupid idea. “No sex.”

“No sex with other people?”

“No sex with anyone , Oliver. If you want to experiment with commitment, then I’d like to see you try committing to chastity, too.”

He sighed, “So...you would agree to do this for a month, but only if I don’t have sex, not even with you?”

“Yep,” she smirked.

“What about you? You’d be allowed to have sex with other people?” he asked. Felicity shrugged, and Oliver shook his head, staring at her. “Well, that doesn’t seem fair.”

She scoffed, “Well, this was your idea, not mine.” Rolling her eyes at him, Felicity relented, knowing that he wouldn’t agree to this, anyway. He was only entertaining the conversation. “Fine, I wouldn’t sleep with anyone, either. Unlike you, I can handle not having sex for four weeks, Oliver.”

“Okay,” he narrowed his eyes at her. “Then we have a deal.”

“Oh, please,” she laughed.

Oliver continued to watch her, his expression the same. “You said we would do this if I agreed to those terms. I agreed. So that means we have a deal.” He smirked, “And I guess it means you have a new boyfriend.”

Chapter Text

They had a deal.

Before Felicity really knew what was happening, she and Oliver had a deal.

She had only been bluffing. She never thought that he would agree not to have sex for a month. And she couldn’t believe that she’d somehow managed to agree to date him. Even if it wasn’t real, it was an awful plan. Actually, the idea of fake dating Oliver sounded more terrifying than real dating Oliver.

There was no way this wouldn’t end horribly. 

“So,” Alena stared at her from across the table, pulling Felicity from her thoughts. They were at Verdant, where they’d agreed to get drinks after work. 

“So...what?”

Alena sighed dramatically, dropping her straw back into her glass. “How is it going with Mr. Friends With Benefits? Did you guys hook up after Sara and Nyssa’s wedding?”

“No,” Felicity shook her head. “We actually decided that we would...stop doing that all together.”

Now that it had been a few days, it was hard to remember why she’d thought that cutting off the best sex of her life had been a good idea. 

Her friend’s eyes widened. “Wow. Just like that? I thought things were starting to get complicated there. Is that why you stopped?”

“Not exactly,” Felicity grumbled. “Apparently things weren’t as complicated for Oliver. He seems pretty unbothered by everything, actually. I just don’t think the lines are as clear for me as they are for him.”

“Well they shouldn’t be,” Alena assured her with a nod. “He’s an idiot if he thinks the two of you can maintain a friends with benefits type of relationship without either one; catching feelings, or two; ruining your friendship. Honestly, it’s probably a good idea to stop it before you guys got into something that neither of you are prepared for.”

Felicity bit her lip, swiping her finger over the water that dripped from the side of her drink. “Actually...he suggested something else.” Seeing her friend’s expectant look, Felicity groaned. “Oliver thinks that we should try to—uh, commit , I guess? He wants us to date, on an experimental sort of basis. We’d treat it like a relationship, just without the risk of falling in love because we’re friends . And because according to him, we’re not the type of people who fall in love.”

Alena blinked, her face blank as she processed the words. Finally, she opened her mouth, “But...why?”

“He wants to know what it’s like, I guess...to be monogamous. He said we could try it out for a month. See what it’s like. See if either of us are ready for a real relationship.”

“So he wants you to be his practice girlfriend!? Please tell me you kicked him in the nuts for even suggesting something that ridiculous,” Alena gaped at her.

Felicity let her face fall into her hands, knowing that her friend had every right to be shocked. Not only did Felicity have a bad habit of ghosting the people she dated when things got serious, but Oliver was probably the only guy in her life who remained a constant.

And this would be risking that.

Big time.

“Well, I added a clause that neither of us would have sex for the month because I thought Oliver would change his mind about the whole thing. But he still wants to do it.”

Alena looked a little worried as she watched her, “Felicity, this seems like the perfect storm to get your heart broken.”

Lifting her shoulder, Felicity just gave her a sad shrug. 

Yes, there was something deeper than friendship and deeper than sex happening between her and Oliver. Yes, she was terrified of finding out what that was. And yes, she was even more terrified that she would fall for him and that those feelings wouldn’t be reciprocated. But isn’t that what has been happening since they met, anyway? Steadily, she’d been developing feelings. Wouldn’t it be better to explore them now, before they got any deeper, and deal with the consequences? At least, it seemed like a better option than waking up one day when she’s in her forties and realizing that she’d been too much of a chicken to even try.

They had chemistry. Maybe it was as simple as that. Maybe they’d both come to the conclusion that it was nothing more than a mutual attraction and they’d laugh about it someday. Then they’d go on to have happy, healthy relationships with other people.

Yeah, that seemed like the most realistic option. Besides, she knew Oliver. Once he got an idea in his head...it was hard to convince him of anything else.

She could ride this out.

They’d do this ‘dating’ thing for a week, tops. Then Oliver would get tired of it. He’d want to have sex. And they’d forget about the silly plan entirely.

They had to.

After another hour and three more drinks, the two girls were giggling over some office drama at Palmer Tech that Alena was filling Felicity in on, happily forgetting about Oliver and his crazy plan. 

That is, of course, until the man himself strolled up to their table, Tommy Merlyn right behind him.

“You’re late,” Felicity narrowed her eyes at each of them. 

Oliver just shrugged, pulling out the chair that was next to her and sitting down. Tommy took the seat straight across from her, his attention already on Alena. “Miss Whitlock,” he purred, “I didn’t realize I’d have the pleasure of seeing you here tonight.”

Alena rolled her eyes, familiar with Tommy’s flirtatious ways whenever they crossed paths. Alena and Felicity had met over a year ago when they both started working at Palmer Tech around the same time. And Tommy had been trying to charm Alena’s pants off for almost as long. 

“Will anyone else be joining us tonight?” Alena pouted, pressing the heel of her hand against Tommy’s forehead and literally shoving him away.

Tommy just grinned. “Aren’t you tired of playing hard to get?”

“Aren’t you tired of getting rejected?” She snarked back. Then she turned her big, puppy-dog eyes to Felicity. “Don’t tell me that you roped me into a night with these two.”

“Sorry,” Felicity raised her hands innocently.

“Aw, Fel!” Her friend groaned, dropping her head. Felicity rolled her eyes at the nickname, which she hated so much that no one was allowed to use it besides Alena. And the only reason Alena was allowed to call her Fel was because unlike the rest of her friends, she didn’t care when Felicity nagged at her to stop. “I need another drink.”

Before Alena could even ask, Tommy was hopping up from the table, “I’ll help you.”

As their friends left, Oliver shifted closer to Felicity, his eyes meeting hers evenly. “You still haven’t given me a date.”

Felicity huffed out a laugh, “You’re still not giving up on this, huh?”

“Nope,” Oliver grinned, reaching over to grab her drink and finish the rest of it. Knowing that she was already a little buzzed and that Alena would bring her another one anyway, she didn’t really mind. “Are you scared or something, Felicity?”

“Scared?” She scoffed, brushing it off. “No, of course not.”

He raised an eyebrow, his face still very close to hers. And his eyes were so blue. “Well, I said that our deal would last one month. You’re supposed to tell me when that month starts. You haven’t.”

Felicity laughed, seeing his eagerness. “What are you in such a hurry for? I was just trying to give you some time to get all that meaningless sex with strangers out of your system before the month starts. I thought you’d be enjoying your freedom while it lasts.”

Oliver clenched his jaw, his eyes never wavering from hers. “I’m ready whenever you are.”

She licked her lips, glancing away and wishing that Alena and Tommy would come back. Just to buy her some time. Oliver was really putting her on the spot about this. He was being persistent. And it was kind of sweet that he was so eager to start their little ‘experiment,’ she just wasn’t entirely sure why he was refusing to let it go. When she dodged the subject, he didn’t laugh it off like he usually would. He pushed.

But he was also dead right. 

She was scared.

“Fine,” Felicity shrugged, hoping that she wasn’t letting it show. “We’ll start tomorrow.”

“Really?”

Felicity leveled him with a look, “What? Now you’re having second thoughts?”

Raising his hands in surrender, Oliver shook his head. “No. I’m all in. I’ve taken what you said at the wedding seriously. And I’ll take the commitment seriously. I promise. If I fuck up, you’ll have every right to be pissed at me. I know this whole idea seems strange, but I’m going to treat it like it’s real, and I would never want to hurt you for real.”

The way he said the words made her heart beat faster. The way he looked at her gave her butterflies. “Okay, Oliver…” Felicity mumbled, forcing herself to pull her eyes away from his.

“So,” he cleared his throat. “I think tonight, we should make a list.”

Her eyes swung back to him as she fidgeted in her chair. “A list?”

Oliver shrugged, “Yeah. I mean, we could ‘date’ for a whole month and barely see each other, right? I think we should come up with some things that we can do together. Things we would want to do if we were in a real relationship.”

Felicity furrowed her eyebrows, assessing him. She half expected him to burst out laughing and say that he was just messing with her. “Things,” she repeated. “Like what? I already told you—”

“I’m not talking about sex, Felicity.”

She narrowed her eyes at him, “Well, I know you’re always thinking about sex. So what are you talking about then?”

Oliver let out a breath, “I don’t know...like, I’ve always wanted to go on a road trip with someone. You know, just drive somewhere new and spend the day exploring.”

Shrugging her shoulders, Felicity allowed that.

It didn’t sound terrible.

“What else?”

Oliver smiled, tipping his head as Tommy and Alena made their way back to the table, each of their hands filled with drinks. “Come hang out at the loft when we’re done here. We can discuss the terms.”

Felicity rolled her eyes, wondering how he was so formal and serious about this arrangement when the guy she knew was anything but. They’d become friends so quickly because Oliver was outgoing and laid-back. And they’d become fuck buddies because he never took anything too seriously. He followed whatever desire he pleased. Not that that choice was all on him, of course. She’d been a very willing participant. It was just odd to see him so focused, that’s all.

Like a dog with a bone, he wasn’t giving this up. And bizarrely, it was a new side of him. 

Felicity felt more like they were discussing some kind of contract rather than a relationship. And that didn’t make her feel as excited about going back to his place as she’d been a few times before.

They spent the next few hours talking and laughing with their friends, putting the conversation on the back burner. The tension settled down once the boys had a few drinks, and once Tommy gave up on persuading Alena to sleep with him. Instead, he turned his attention to a red head in a short dress. As the night went on, Alena started to yawn and Tommy started dropping hints that he wanted the red head to come home with him. 

Eventually, Oliver leaned in close again, mumbling in her ear, “Ready to go?”

He left his keys with Tommy, wanting to make sure his friend wouldn’t be stranded. And then he drove Felicity’s car to Alena’s apartment, dropping her off before they headed for his. Felicity could see the looks that Alena was throwing her in the rearview mirror, and she knew her friend was going to bombard her with questions tomorrow. But for tonight, she kept her lips shut.

As Oliver pulled up in front of his apartment building, he handed Felicity his key. “Go on up, I’ll park in the garage and be right in.”

She nodded, hopping out of the car and heading straight inside, goosebumps rising on her bare legs as she walked the short distance to the door. Felicity did as he’d said, using the key to let herself into the private elevator that went right up to the penthouse. She sighed as the doors opened, revealing the spacious, warm, homey space that she’d become so comfortable in.

Before the elevator doors had even closed, Oliver’s cat was under her feet, meowing as he weaved around her ankles. “Hi Bigfoot,” Felicity bent down to pick him up, her thumb rubbing between his eyes. She carried him into the kitchen, kissing his head as she cooed, “Oh, hi handsome. You’re so handsome, yes you are. How’s my favorite boy today?”

Flicking the lights on above the countertop, Felicity found Bigfoot’s bag of treats, hearing him purr as he nudged his head under her chin. She took a couple of them out, setting him back on the floor and giving him both treats at once. 

They were gone in seconds, and Felicity couldn’t help but laugh as she picked the big cat back up.

Oliver came out of the elevator a few moments later, snorting when he saw her. “You know he only likes you because you give him treats every time you come over.”

Felicity pouted, her fingers scratching Bigfoot’s neck. “That’s not true.” She knew that Oliver was just jealous. He’d gotten the cat shortly after she moved to Starling, and she remembered the first time she went to the penthouse, he’d warned her about his new cat. Named Bigfoot. Because he had two extra toes on one paw and was rarely ever seen. Oliver had said that the cat liked to sneak around the house, stow away under the couch especially, and swat at people’s feet as they walked by.

So it surprised them both that the more time Felicity started spending at the loft, the more Bigfoot started to come out of his hiding places.

“All right,” she finally sighed, wanting to get on with this whole list thing he’d been talking about. “I guess we should make the rules for this fake relationship before I completely lose my buzz.”

In response, Oliver held up a finger, backing out of the kitchen. She followed him into the living room area, settling onto the couch with Bigfoot as Oliver jogged up the stairs. A moment later, he returned, holding a pen and a notebook. “Okay,” he breathed, sitting down beside her. “I’ll start.”

He put the pen to paper, slowly writing something, and Felicity leaned in to peer over his shoulder. “Cooking?” She asked, reading the single word he’d written.

“Yeah,” Oliver shrugged, “As in, I cook for you.”

“You’ve cooked for me before,” she countered.

Oliver gave her a look, “Yes, but I’m not talking about making you scrambled eggs and french toast because you feel like having breakfast for dinner. I want to buy ingredients, cook a real meal for you, and eat it together. The whole thing.”

At that, Felicity sucked in a breath.

This was going to be even harder than she imagined if he kept talking like that. 

Taking the notebook and pen from his hand, she added her own two cents to the first thing on the list. Next to his sharp, quick letters, her handwriting was large and bouncy, the contrast almost comical. She set the notebook back on his lap and Oliver chuckled as he read her addition out loud; “Only if Oliver can promise that Felicity won’t get food poisoning.”

He handed the notebook back to her, indicating that it was her turn to come up with an idea. She bit her lip as she thought about it, then wrote: Cuddling (clothes on)

Oliver smirked, shaking his head as he read it. “This is going to be a lot of firsts. Can’t say I’ve ever done that before.” Then he sighed, chewing on the end of the pen as he considered what else he thought they should try doing during their month of dating. “Okay,” he took the pen out of his mouth and turned his head to look at her. “Well, I’ve never just taken a girl out on a date. You know, picking her up, going out to dinner, dropping her off. Kissing her goodnight.” 

Felicity’s heart clenched in her chest at the idea of him doing that with her. At the idea of him wanting to do that with her.

Yep. This next month was going to be the death of her.

“I mean,” Oliver continued, “I have...aside from the last part. I’ve never had a date like that without spending the night with the girl. But since you already banned me from getting in your pants, I’d like to try the whole goodnight kiss thing.” 

And there was the asshole she knew and loved.

Oliver’s lips twitched with a smile, reading her tiny huff of irritation perfectly as he scrawled the words Goodnight Kiss onto the list.

“You’re disgusting, you know that?” Felicity reached over Bigfoot to grab a pillow, tossing it in Oliver’s direction.

“I’ve always wanted to know what it’s like to kiss a girl goodnight after a date,” he mumbled, his voice more serious than she’d been expecting. “You know, just a kiss? And I know that as long as I don’t act like a jerk, you and I could have a really nice date. And a really nice kiss.” 

He scribbled along the side of the paper as he spoke, not meeting her eyes. Like he was confessing a secret that he was embarrassed about.

Felicity smiled. “Wow. Oliver...that’s actually pretty sweet.” She started to write down her addendum to his request, which most of the items on the list seemed to have, a mix of each of their handwriting. 

“‘Date included,’” Oliver nodded, reading the words she’d tacked on. “So, kissing is allowed then?” 

Felicity shrugged, “In this case, yes. I don’t see the point in us making out just for the hell of it. But I think I can agree to a simple goodnight kiss. Especially if it includes a free dinner beforehand. You know, for the process of this whole experiment thing.”

“For the process,” he answered softly, his eyes combing over her face.

Clearing her throat, Felicity brought his attention back to the list. “Anyway, what about your road trip idea? Where should we go?”

“How about we just pick a Saturday that we’re both free and we drive, see where the road takes us.” Oliver suggested, making her grin. For someone who had never been in a serious relationship and who prided himself on noncommitment, the guy sure did have some romantic ideas. He took the pen back from her to write it: Day Trip.

They continued to talk well into the night, discussing the list until they’d narrowed down their thoughts. Oliver had tried to sneak in a few R-rated ideas, like letting him finger her in a public place, but Felicity promptly scolded him and crossed it off the paper. By the end of it, they had ten things on their list.

Ten wasn’t bad. 

Most of the items on the list were things that they could do in a single day. Most of them were small things. And they had a whole month. Felicity nodded to herself as she read over the list. She could do this. It wasn’t like she had to spend the month glued to his hip until she inevitably fell in love with him. If Oliver even lasted the entire month, she just had to embrace a few romantic, cheesy date ideas.

And then this would be over. 

They would go back to being friends. Oliver would probably decide that having a ‘girlfriend’ had been tortuous and he’d never subject himself to a real one. Or  he’d realize that it wasn’t as bad as he thought, and he’d try dating someone who he could actually see himself being with.

But that person wasn’t her.

And that was the part that she knew she just had to accept.

Felicity sighed, leaning back against the couch and dropping the list onto the cushion between them. As if he knew that they were finished with all the debating and plan-making, Bigfoot climbed onto her lap and laid down. His loud purring filled the room as Felicity scratched behind his ear. “I should probably be getting home.”

“Stay,” Oliver whispered, resting his arm on the back of the couch. “I’m sure Bigfoot would appreciate your company in the guest bedroom.”

She turned her head, checking the clock on the stove in the kitchen. “It’s not 11:00 yet. If you can make it quick, you still have time to find a girl in your contacts who lives close by. I’m serious about the no sex thing. Starting tomorrow, we’re celibate. So if you want a booty-call, this is your last chance.”

She swallowed roughly, imagining that if she stayed the night, she’d be lying alone in his guest bedroom when that happened. And there were certain things she never wanted to hear.

Oliver raised his eyebrows, his hand sliding to her shoulder where he slowly brushed her hair behind her back, his fingers warm and gentle. “Then why don’t you just come upstairs with me…”

Felicity bit her lip, considering that option. She would certainly miss sex for the next four weeks. And she didn’t have a phone full of random men that she could call and invite to her apartment for the night. Screwing Oliver one more time, potentially for the last time, was definitely an appealing idea. Although, it could make tomorrow even more complicated than it was already going to be.

“You don’t think that would make this next month sort of hard?”

“I’m sure that it will,” he looked into her eyes. “But denying ourselves of this pleasure is going to be hard anyway. I don’t want to have meaningless sex tonight. I want you.”

His voice was low, the heat in his eyes and in his tone was clear. And for a brief moment, Felicity let herself think that he truly meant what it sounded like he meant. That it wasn’t just about the really good sex they shared. She let herself believe that the desire burning in the air between them, a palpable thing, was about her. She let herself dream it.

And then she let herself burn along with it.

Unwilling to think twice, knowing that they were already heading into dangerous territory with this little agreement they’d come to, Felicity closed the space between them, her mouth searing to Oliver’s.

He kissed her back, his lips instantly parting hers to deepen it. 

His tongue slid into her mouth, his teeth grazing her bottom lip. Felicity gasped as he sucked on the spot, her head getting hazy. 

They were both breathless already. The spark between them was intense. Powerful. Which was exactly what made them cross the line in the first place, like their connection was an unstoppable force that they couldn’t fight. Once they’d had sex for the first time, on the floor of her apartment three months ago, it was impossible to stop. 

The world didn’t end. Things were off between them for a few days, but their friendship survived it. And then they’d kept doing it.

Sex was never really the problem.

Felicity wasn’t nearly as nervous about sleeping with Oliver as she was about dating him. 

Feelings, and romance, and commitment.

That was all so complicated.

But his hands in her hair? His mouth leaving marks on her neck?

That was easy.

That felt good.

“Upstairs,” Felicity moaned. 

The decision was made as soon as she kissed him. Actually, it had been made as soon as she agreed to come to the penthouse. Because somewhere deep down, she knew exactly where it would lead. They both knew. And they both wanted it.

So what was the harm?

Tomorrow would be when the real trouble began, anyway.

Oliver groaned his approval, standing up from the couch and pulling Felicity to her feet. Luckily, Bigfoot got the picture and jumped down from her lap. Staring back at her, ignoring the meows for attention, Oliver picked Felicity up, her legs wrapping around his waist. He started moving to the stairs, walking slowly and keeping his eyes locked on hers the whole way. The cat circled their feet, and Felicity couldn’t help but chuckle as Oliver managed to avoid tripping over the poor little guy.

Once they reached the top of the stairs, Bigfoot sauntered into the guest bedroom that he’d claimed as his own, or to share with Felicity when she used to spend the night. Of course, the last few times she stayed at the penthouse, it was Oliver’s bed that she’d wake up in. 

Apparently tonight would be no different.

He carried her into his bedroom, turning to lay her down on the bed. He didn’t bother turning the lights on, leaving the door open to give them just enough light to see each other. Then he made quick work of undressing her, dropping her clothes on the floor. And Felicity reacted accordingly, pulling his pants and shirt off. She tossed them in the general direction that her own clothes had gone.

Settling into his bed, leaning against the pillows, Felicity welcomed Oliver’s weight as he climbed on top of her. She could feel his erection against her thigh as she squirmed beneath him.

Oliver held himself above her on one elbow, his other hand reaching between her legs. He growled when he felt how wet she was, his fingers spreading her open.

His thumb rubbed back and forth against her clit while his index finger swirled around her entrance. With his eyes on her face, he slipped one finger inside of her. 

Pushing in, pulling out, pushing in again. 

Oliver kept the same pace, and in a matter of minutes, Felicity was writhing. 

The friction wasn’t quite enough to get her off, but it was certainly enough to turn her into a whining, desperate mess. “More,” she begged. “Oliver, please. More .”

Silently, his hand disappeared. She almost cried out in torment, but then she felt his thick length press against her sex, his hips rocking. “Yes!” Felicity spread her legs wider, her hands landing on his ass as she pulled him closer.

A moment later, he was pushing inside her. Oliver sighed, his face smoothing as his eyes slipped shut, as if being inside of her was exactly the relief he needed. And Felicity keened, her back arching off the bed to meet him. He gently rocked into her, shallow thrusts, letting her adjust to his size like he always did.

Felicity urged him on, her teeth sinking into her bottom lip and her nails sinking into his flesh. 

“Oh,” he let out a long, satisfied groan as her walls pulsed around him. “Felicity…”

His forehead pressed against hers. And then he started to move.

It was slow at first, building towards an orgasm that would truly be worth the next few weeks without this.

Seriously, whose stupid idea was that?

Felicity cried out when Oliver sped up his pace; his hips moving faster, ramming into her harder. It didn’t take long for her to feel a familiar numbness in her legs, her toes instinctively curling.

Oliver buried his face in her throat as she came with a shout, her fingers gripping into his hair and her legs tightening around him. She was still coming when she heard Oliver’s breathy grunts in her ear. He drove into her once, twice, and a third time before he followed her over the edge. 

“Oh god! Felicity! Felicity!”  

She loved when he screamed her name like that. 

His hips continued to jerk as he came inside her, his hands gripping her waist, pinning her to the bed.

She loved the complete satisfaction she could bring him. Loved that he never held back.

It was sexy as all hell. And Oliver knew that she loved it.

His breath was heavy and uneven on her neck as they each came down from the high, a light layer of sweat on their skin. He kissed her throat, pulling out of her slowly while they both winced. “You sure you want us to deny ourselves of that for an entire month?” He asked, his voice teasing. 

She could feel the smile on his lips as he continued to leave a trail of kisses up to her jaw. But the question made her suddenly feel anxious. Her arms tightened around him, holding him closer.

No, she wasn’t sure.

She wasn’t sure she could deny herself. She wasn’t sure she would be okay with however this whole mess would end.

She wasn’t really sure of anything anymore.

Chapter Text

The next day, after a quick breakfast and a cup of coffee at Oliver’s, Felicity went back to her own apartment. She always hated when she wasn’t prepared for a sleepover at his place. She also hated the walk to the parking garage down the street because it felt like a walk of shame. Because she somehow managed to bump into his neighbor every time, politely waving at the older woman as she walked her dog. And the woman would always look her up and down with judgement in her eyes as if she knew every dirty thing Felicity had done the night before.

With a sigh, she prepared for the interaction when she saw the woman with her dog, standing on the sidewalk and waiting for the little guy to do his business. Felicity crossed her arms over her chest, as if that did anything to hide her rumpled clothes she’d worn the day before.

She waved. Dog Lady glared. And then she went on her way.

When Felicity got back to her apartment, she showered and made herself more coffee, and then she sat at her small kitchen table and decided to get some work done. She spent hours looking over concept ideas from the engineers, approving project proposals from their team of inventors, and texting back and forth with Alena about which products were the most realistic and affordable.

In truth, she loved her job. She loved being on the developmental technology team at Palmer Tech. And she knew she was lucky that she got to do work she genuinely enjoyed and that made her feel proud.

It made the weekdays go by so much faster than the days she’d spent at Tech Village.

She even loved the work enough that she could dedicate a Saturday to it without being resentful. 

Sometimes when Felicity really got in the zone, like she did that afternoon while discussing the possibility of an implantable chip that could help regenerate dead cells with Alena and one of their co-workers, Curtis Holt, she could forget about everything else. It was only when she stood up from her couch and felt all the blood rush to her head that she realized the piece of toast and four cups of coffee she’d consumed weren’t enough to sustain her through the whole day.

“Felicity, I just don’t think it’s something Mr. Palmer would go for. The guy is known for fancy watches and a mirror that doubles as a fitness coach,” Curtis pointed out. “I mean, he’s charitable. But we’re not exactly leading the charge in cutting edge technology for the medical field.”

Making her way into the kitchen, Felicity sighed. “Yeah, I know,” she put their conference call on speaker so she could climb onto the counter and grab a box of granola bars. “But that doesn’t mean we couldn’t be.”

As much as she loved her job, she couldn’t help but feel like there was so much more good they could be doing for the world. Fancy watches and fitness mirrors were awesome. And she was beyond proud for the role she’d played in those inventions. But they were gadgets. Not exactly life changing or ground breaking. She just thought that between all the brilliant minds at Palmer Tech, they truly had the talent there to do something more meaningful.

Per usual, Curtis had to voice all the problems with the idea, beginning and ending with the fact that they didn’t have nearly enough resources for something so ambitious. Felicity insisted that the money was just a matter of time, so there was no harm in dreaming. And Alena listened to the debate halfheartedly, playing the middle as always.

It was how the three of them spent most of their workdays.

By the time they hung up, it was almost 5:00, and Felicity frowned when she saw that Oliver hadn’t texted her. Plugging her phone in by her bed, she laid down and opted to call him instead.

“Hey,” he answered quickly.

“Hi,” Felicity settled against her pillows. “You know, as the new guy I’m fake dating, you’re not supposed to fuck me and then not call the next day.”

Oliver huffed out a laugh, “To be perfectly honest, I wasn’t really sure how this was all supposed to go.”

“Isn’t that why we made a list?” Felicity countered. When he didn’t answer, she started to get a little nervous. And she hated the instant disappointment that she felt at the thought that he might have changed his mind. She was supposed to want him to change his mind. But after coming up with all those ideas the night before, and having sex, Felicity realized that she’d let herself get excited about it. “Do you think it’s a bad idea for us to be doing this?”

“No,” Oliver replied confidently. “I’m still in. I want to. I’m all for you being my fake girlfriend for the next month. I just...I’m not really sure where to start.”

Felicity smiled, “Well, I’m starving. So maybe we should start with that plan for you to cook me dinner.”

Oliver hummed, thinking it over, but Felicity already knew what his answer would be. “Okay, I’ll pick you up in twenty minutes.”

After getting off the phone with Oliver, Felicity freshened up; brushing her hair, changing into a pair of black jeans and a simple, purple blouse that had a low cut and flared out at the bottom.

She put a little bit of makeup on to kill the time while she waited, knowing it was going to be a relaxed kind of night and she didn’t need to put too much effort into her appearance.

He’d seen her under worse circumstances.

It was just her and Oliver. Eating. Hanging out at his apartment. Maybe they’d watch a movie.

It wouldn’t be anything they haven’t done before.

Then why did she feel so nervous?

Felicity took a deep breath, dropping her mascara back into her makeup bag. She was just putting a pair of flats on her feet when she heard Oliver knocking.

As soon as she opened the door, she pushed on his chest, following him outside and locking up behind her. “Well, hello to you too,” Oliver greeted.

“I told you I’m starving,” Felicity grumbled back, heading for his car. 

They chatted about their day and what Oliver planned to make for dinner, falling into the comfortable groove of the friendship that had gotten them this far. 

It seemed so normal, so platonic, compared to the way they’d ripped each other’s clothes off the night before. 

For them, it was one or the other. Comfortable friendship or overwhelming lust. They had yet to find a middle ground between bickering and going at it like bunnies.

So...despite her fears, Felicity was really curious to see what this little ‘dating’ experiment would bring. Maybe that’s why she even considered going along with this. Maybe she just needed to know if there was a middle ground. And maybe this was the only way that the two of them knew how to find it.

He turned down the wrong street, going in the opposite direction of his apartment, and Felicity frowned, “Where are we going?”

“The grocery store,” Oliver replied. “I have a few things I need to get to make dinner.”

She shrugged, remaining silent as he pulled into the parking lot and found a spot. 

As they walked into the store, Oliver surprised her by taking her hand, lacing his fingers through hers. Felicity’s eyes darted up to his in question.

And yet, it felt nice. Especially when he smiled at her, “I heard that people who are dating do this sometimes. Just thought I’d try it out.”

Felicity snorted, “I don’t remember putting ‘hand holding’ on our list.”

Oliver just shrugged, his thumb running back and forth across her wrist. “No, it’s not on the list. I don’t hate it, though.”

“Gee, thanks.”

Taking a basket from the pile by the front door, Felicity let Oliver lead the way, watching him when he walked over to the vegetables to find what he needed.

He carefully picked out everything; taking his time as he let go of her hand to analyze the produce, and then he’d reach for her again after putting it into the basket she carried. It almost seemed like he was doing it absently, reaching for her. Like his mind somewhere else as they moved down the rows of the store. 

When he was finished, Felicity dragged him towards the snack aisle. 

She quickly pulled down a box of cookies, groaning and already planning to crack them open in the car on the way to the loft.

Oliver gave her a disappointed look, “You don’t need backup junk food, Felicity. I told you my cooking is edible. I promised not to give you food poisoning when we made the list, didn’t I?”

Felicity scoffed at him, “Oliver, please. This isn’t in case of a kitchen emergency. Consider this pregaming. Because I’m so hungry right now, I could eat you.”

He raised an eyebrow.

Felicity’s mouth fell open as her own words registered in her brain. “I didn’t mean that kind of—” her eyes subconsciously flickered down his body. She swallowed, “I meant eat you, like, like in a cannibal sort of way. Because I’m starving.”

Oliver continued to stare at her. “That doesn’t make it better, Felicity.”

“Right.”

“You forgot to eat today, didn’t you? Again.”

She rolled her eyes, and tried to lie, not wanting another lecture from him. “No, of course not. I ate.” He gave her a look that told her he wasn’t buying it for even a moment. “Fine,” Felicity sighed. “Yeah, I forgot. I was busy with work all day. And I told you, I’m starving!”

Shaking his head, Oliver reached for the box of cookies, but Felicity quickly pulled them away. “Felicity,” he sighed. “I have cookies at my apartment, you don’t need these.”

“No, trust me, I do. I need these. Those organic cardboard things that you buy? They’re gross.”

Rather than trying to take the box from her again, Oliver grabbed her waist, pulling her against his chest. “Oh, they’re gross, huh?” He chuckled, his fingers tickling her sides.

Felicity squirmed, struggling to get away without dropping everything in her arms. “Oliver! Stop it!” She pleaded through her giggles, trying not to make a scene.

“Excuse me…”

Felicity and Oliver both stopped, turning around to see an older man waiting behind them. He smiled politely, gesturing his hand to indicate that he just wanted to get by. Oliver quickly stepped aside, guiding Felicity out of the way, too.

“Sorry,” Felicity pinched her lips together, her face growing red. “Excuse us, sir.”

The man just laughed, “Oh, don’t worry about it, kids. I remember being young and in love once. You two make a cute couple.”

Felicity felt her face turning a deeper shade of red. But Oliver grinned at the man, unfazed as he wrapped his arm around Felicity and nodded. “Well, thank you. My girlfriend’s quite the catch.”

Nudging her elbow into his stomach, she kept her mouth shut until the man was gone. She raised an eyebrow in question. And Oliver smirked, giving her nothing more than a shrug in response. Then he took her hand again, leading them towards the registers like it wasn’t a big deal. 

And it wasn’t.

He was obviously teasing. But that didn’t help Felicity’s heart recover any faster from hearing Oliver refer to her as his girlfriend. Saying it out loud, to another person, as if it was real.

With a sigh, she pushed the thoughts from her mind, following Oliver through the store until she noticed the wine aisle and made a sharp turn, yanking him with her.

“Oh, good idea,” Oliver followed willingly this time. She watched him out of the corner of her eye as he perused the selection. “I could use a nice white for the sauce.”

Felicity openly gaped at him. Not that he seemed to notice. His attention was on the wine. “Who are you?” she mumbled under her breath as she grabbed the closest bottle she could reach, prepared to drink the whole thing herself by the end of the night if Oliver didn’t start acting like himself again. 

He wasn’t a ‘let me just mosey around the grocery store’ kind of guy. He wasn’t a ‘I need to find the perfect wine to use in the sauce I plan on cooking’ kind of guy. And he certainly wasn’t a hand holding or a telling random strangers about his girlfriend kind of guy.

It just surprised her.

But even more mind boggling was how at ease Oliver seemed about all of it. Sure, this had all been his idea, but Felicity expected him to hate it. Or at least feel as weird about it as she did. Yet, he was acting as if grocery shopping was something that they did together regularly.

And it felt domestic.

Felicity’s eyes flickered away from him, focusing on the only other person in the aisle just to keep from staring at Oliver like he was some sort of robot look-alike instead of her friend. 

The woman that caught her eye was farther down the aisle. Felicity watched as she picked up a bottle of red, put it into her cart, then grabbed another and put that in as well.

She looked vaguely familiar, but Felicity couldn’t place her face. 

As if feeling eyes on her, the woman turned and made eye contact, and Felicity instantly felt her breath catch as she suddenly recognized her.

Laurel Lance.

Sara’s distant cousin who avoided Oliver like he was the plague, to the point that Felicity had never crossed paths with her. She never came to visit Boston while they were in school. Never came out with them once they all wound up in Starling. Laurel hadn’t even attended Sara’s wedding because she knew that Oliver would be there as Sara’s best man.

Because Laurel also happened to be Oliver’s ex-girlfriend from high school. And from what Felicity gathered, she hated his guts.

Oh boy.

Felicity quickly pulled her hand out of Oliver’s grasp, making him look down at her in confusion, his expression slightly hurt as he met her wide eyes. Just as he opened his mouth to ask what was wrong, he noticed Laurel, and his lips snapped shut.

He stood there frozen for a moment, staring at his ex while Felicity watched him for a reaction. She’d only seen Laurel Lance in old pictures that Oliver and Sara had shown her from their teenage years. And Oliver had always seemed content next to her. Gorgeous Laurel. Although, their history had been anything but content.

Straightening her back, Laurel approached them, her eyes bouncing between him and Felicity. “Oliver,” she forced a smile.

“Laurel. H–hey,” he floundered for a moment, clearly surprised that she was even speaking to him. “How have you been?”

“Good,” she nodded politely. “Just getting some wine for girls night. How are you?”

“I’m good,” he huffed. A long, awkward moment passed as the two floundered, neither of them seeming to know what to say next. 

So Felicity held her hand out, “Hi, I’m Felicity.”

“Felicity,” Laurel cocked her head to the side. “You’re friends with Sara too, right?”

“I am.”

Laurel’s eyes looked her up and down, sizing her up. And even though it was subtle, Felicity could feel the tension, like she was being gauged and compared. Instantly, it took her back to her own high school days. And instantly, she got the feeling that Laurel didn’t like her.

“And you’re Ollie’s…” she let the suggestion hang, obvious, waiting for one of them to fill in the blank.

“Friend,” Oliver quickly supplied, flashing a smile. “This is my best friend, Felicity.”

If hearing Oliver call her his girlfriend just a few moments ago to that stranger had made her feel flattered and breathless, then hearing him clarify now, for his ex-girlfriend, that they were only friends had the opposite effect.

“Right,” Laurel’s eyes continued to evaluate them, the look on her face still guarded. Cautious. “Well, I should get going. It was good to see you, Ollie.”

“Good to see you too…”

The undeniable awareness of being a third wheel made Felicity feel uncomfortable. And it was about one thousand times worse than seeing Oliver flirt with random women at a bar. This wasn’t a stranger. And this seemed different.

“And Felicity,” Laurel managed to pull her eyes away from Oliver, “it was nice to meet you.”

Felicity forced a smile, not wanting her, or god forbid Oliver, to see how much the moment was bothering her. “Of course, you too.”

She waved awkwardly as the other woman walked away, her high heels clicking on the tile. Felicity felt certain that if Oliver stopped her to ask for her number, or a date, or a second chance, Laurel Lance would probably say yes. The slow steps of her retreat told her that she might even be waiting for it.

So much for hating his guts.

To his credit, Oliver didn’t linger on his ex-girlfriend; not paying attention to her long legs or noticing the way she was swaying her hips with each step. As soon as the woman turned around, he looked down at Felicity and raised his eyebrows. 

“Come on,” he mumbled, grabbing a bottle of white wine from the shelf as Laurel disappeared around the corner.

Turning on her heel, Felicity crossed her arms and headed for the registers, which was luckily in the opposite direction that Laurel Lance had gone. She didn’t say a word while they paid for the groceries, each of them taking a few bags. She wasn’t really sure what to say.

Oliver hadn’t done anything wrong. It’s not like she could be mad at him for not lying to his ex about their fake relationship like he’d lied to that stranger who caught him tickling her.

After putting the bags into the backseat, Felicity got back into the car, feeling Oliver’s eyes on her as they left the store and headed towards his apartment. “So,” she looked back at him, knowing that if she didn’t break the silence, it wouldn’t take him long to start pestering her about what was wrong. “The infamous Laurel Lance returns.”

He gave her a wary glance, “Infamous...how, exactly?”

“Oh, please,” Felicity scoffed. “I remember Sara telling me that you guys used to date. You were blushing and you got all tongue tied. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you like that.”

“Well,” Oliver quipped, “that’s because it’s not very often that I come across people who despise me the way that Laurel despises me.”

“You were like a school boy trying to talk to his crush for the first time,” Felicity shot back. Oliver huffed in annoyance at that, narrowing his eyes at her. But Felicity just shrugged, giving him a passive roll of her eyes. “Not that I blame you...I mean, she’s beautiful. I just didn’t peg you as the type to be so hung up on an old flame, you know? I guess it would explain why you hate love and everything about relationships, though. It must have ended pretty bad, considering how she avoids you now. Well, up until today that is. I’m pretty sure she would have agreed to just about anything you asked back there. It didn’t seem like she hates you nearly as much as you and Sara made it seem.”

“I was not nervous,” Oliver cut off her rambling. “And I am not hung up on Laurel.”

“Then what was all of that about?”

Oliver frowned at the question, his eyes flickering from the road to her. “Look, we’ve talked about it and you know I didn’t treat her right. I cheated on her constantly, but the thing about Laurel...she never took it out on me. She would find out who I’d been with and make that girl’s life a living hell. I went to this girl’s house one night for a party; Suzie Pray. The cops busted it and Suzie got sent to a boarding school when her parents found out. Apparently, someone told Laurel that I was there to hook up with Suzie. She’s the one who called the cops because she knew Suzie would get in a lot of trouble. That was mostly the reason that I finally ended things with her.”

“Okay…” Felicity’s eyebrows furrowed as she absorbed the story. She hadn’t heard much about Laurel or Oliver’s history with her. It was all in the past by the time they met in college. But she did know that his relationship with Sara’s cousin was a brief, very loose interpretation of the term ‘dating,’ considering all the lying and cheating Oliver did. But if he disliked Laurel so much, then his behavior in the store didn’t really add up. “So why were you acting so weird back there? It seemed like you wanted her to know you’re single. Which, need I remind you, per our agreement, you’re technically not.”

“I saw the way she was looking at you, Felicity. She was like a shark smelling for blood.”

Felicity scoffed, “First of all, I think that’s a little dramatic, you’ve changed a lot and I’m sure Laurel has too. Did I get the whole catty-girl-vibe from her? Hell yeah. But Oliver, it’s been a decade since high school and you’re not her two-timing boyfriend anymore. And second of all, I can take care of myself.”

He sighed as she finished, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel. “I know you can,” his voice was soft as he turned to look at her. “You’re right. I just didn’t want her to treat you like that and in the moment it seemed best to avoid it. Besides, we haven’t really talked about what we’re going to tell our friends about this arrangement. I assume you’ve talked to Alena. But Laurel could say something to Sara, and I...I don’t know how you’d feel about that? Explaining this to her? That’s why I called you my friend...not because I wanted Laurel to think I’m single, Felicity.”

She quickly looked away, feeling all of her anger dissipate. That...made a lot of sense. Oliver hadn’t been nervous about bumping into his hot ex-girlfriend. He’d felt uncomfortable. And it was kind of sweet that part of his discomfort was because he was worried about her. Felicity blew out a breath as she mumbled, “Wow.”

His eyes flickered from the road to her, hesitation in his gaze. “What?”

Felicity made a face, “Was that our first fight as a couple?” 

Oliver huffed out a laugh, “We’ve had worse fights.”

“Arguments don’t need to progressively get worse every time you have them, Oliver,” she rolled her eyes. “Besides, you did good! Great job explaining yourself. I suppose you’re off the hook.”

“You’ve never been one to let me off the hook. You’re much meaner than that.”

Felicity slapped his arm, “I’m not mean!”

Oliver laughed, “I never said I didn’t like it.”

“Fine, but for the record, I’m not going to let us get carried away with this. We can just...keep it between us. As far as anyone else is concerned, nothing has changed. We’re not trying to do something crazy here like trick our friends and family.”

Or ourselves.

“Of course,” he nodded, “that never works in romcoms anyway, right?”

They arrived at his apartment a few minutes later and carted the groceries into the building. Felicity walked straight into his penthouse, heading for the island in the center of the kitchen, placing the bags on the countertop with Oliver right behind.

Once they had all their ingredients out, and once Felicity had stolen a couple of cookies, they washed their hands and Oliver guided her to the counter. “Okay,” he clapped his hands together. “What do you want to help with? Cutting up the vegetables, cooking the chicken, or making the sauce?”

“I’m helping? I thought you were cooking for me.”

Oliver leveled her with a look, “Where’s the fun in that? Besides...it defeats the purpose. Cooking together is a normal thing that couples do, isn’t it?”

“Like holding hands?”

He grinned, a devilish glint in his eye as he looked back at her from across the room. “Yeah, like holding hands. And plenty of other things. But we can start with cooking.”

“I don’t cook.”

“I know,” Oliver chuckled. “That’s why I’m supervising. I’d rather not have this evening end with my kitchen up in flames.”

Felicity stuck her tongue out at him before reaching for the carrots and potatoes he’d picked out. She was much more confident in her ability to use a knife than she was with anything that involved a chef’s instinct. Which, apparently, Oliver had.

He stood beside her at the stove, focused on cooking the chicken, adding spices to the sauce as he saw fit. She was surprisingly impressed when he leaned around her to get a lemon out of the fridge and then proceeded to zest it, commenting that it was just what the white wine sauce needed. 

She didn’t even know that Oliver knew what zesting meant.

The pan simmered on the burner as they cooked, filling the room with the most delicious smells that made her stomach turn with excitement. And hunger. The cookies weren’t doing much to hold her over, after all.

Once the vegetables were roasting in the oven and she didn’t have anything else to do, Felicity poured them each a glass of wine, then she settled onto a stool and opened a magazine she found on the table. But she barely cared about the catalogue of clothes and home décor, because she was much more interested in watching Oliver Queen work his way around the kitchen. He was a natural, despite the fact that Felicity had no idea he even knew where his cooking utensils were kept, much less that he knew how to use them. 

As she nibbled on another cookie and watched him, Felicity found herself preoccupied with other thoughts. The long-legged, ex-girlfriend kind of thoughts that she just couldn’t seem to get out of her head. Oliver’s explanation made enough sense. He’d always been protective of her in strange ways like that. Felicity had gotten the sense that the woman had claws, so it wasn’t all that surprising that Oliver wanted to avoid them. But the thing she really couldn’t wrap her head around was how he’d ever dated someone like Laurel in the first place.

She hated to be judgmental, but Oliver was one of the warmest people she’d ever met, and Laurel...seemed the opposite.

Ever since Felicity met Oliver, he’d been flippant about women, trivial about relationships, and thoughtless about almost everything. She liked to think he’d changed a lot since college. Surely he’d grown into a respectable man and business owner. But when it came to love? Oliver seemed just as clueless now as he had been back then. And Felicity couldn’t help but wonder how much Laurel Lance played a role in how he turned out. He’d said that Laurel was quite ruthless to the girls he’d cheated on her with, but that she forgave him and stayed with him every time. But...why? And why did he let her get away with that? Why didn’t he just break up with her, since he clearly didn’t love her enough not to cheat?

Felicity wanted to chalk it up to two people who were young, dumb, and didn’t know themselves. But with Laurel popping up at the store, right in her face like that, the questions were starting to eat her up. And Felicity knew she wasn’t going to enjoy this night very much unless she confronted it.

She and Oliver did that. They were friends and they confronted things. They were always honest with each other. It was why their friendship had lasted longer than any flings that either of them have ever had.

Right?

“Oliver,” Felicity pushed the magazine aside, waiting for him to look at her. “I was just wondering...was Laurel your first love? Or, I mean, is she the closest you’ve been to it?” Since he’s mentioned, many times, that he’s never been in love.

“Felicity,” he looked at her sternly, “do we really need to talk about this?”

“Why not!?”

“You know my dating history,” he pointed out.

“No,” Felicity disagreed. “I know your disgusting mating history. Huge difference. Come on, tell me.”

He blinked at her for a moment, then he sighed, turned the stove off, and stepped over to the island where she sat. “You seriously want to talk about this?”

“Talking about past relationships is a normal thing that couples do, isn’t it?” she tossed his words back at him.

“No, Laurel wasn’t my first love,” he sighed, giving in. “Actually, whatever we felt for each other was basically an unhealthy, twisted version of what we both thought love was at the time.” Oliver met Felicity’s gaze evenly, as if he knew that that was the best way to get his point across. “Despite my mistakes, I thought that was how I felt about her. But as I got older, I realized that it was never love. What Laurel and I had was probably the most toxic relationship of my life...and you’ve met my parents.”

“Well,” Felicity chewed on her lip. “That’s all hindsight, right? I mean, not to tear open old wounds, but why did you cheat on her, then? If you thought you were in love at the time, I can’t wrap my head around why you would...”

Oliver shrugged, “I was also really good at sabotaging myself. Still am, I suppose. Laurel was everything I thought I wanted because she was everything my parents wanted for me. She didn’t bat an eye at my...indiscretions. She had our whole future planned, and she didn’t care if I screwed up because she always said that I was just a boy...and that I’d become a good man someday.” He lifted a shoulder, “I guess I liked that she saw me that way. I assumed that we were great together because everyone else said we were. She said we were, even after everything I did.”

“So that night with Suzie Pray was the wakeup call?”

Oliver sighed, “I finally accepted that I wasn’t going to change if people kept letting me off the hook or finding someone else to blame. It made me realize that I wanted to be a good man, but I would never be a good man for her. I guess that’s what Laurel finally realized after I broke up with her. And why she decided to cut me out of her life completely when we went off to college.”

“You know me,” Felicity whispered, “and you know I love you, Oliver, so I don’t want this question to come across as rude, but...is she the reason that you got to be the way you are?”

“Felicity,” he laughed. “My opinions on love, sex, and marriage have nothing to do with a broken heart that never healed or a torch I still carry for an ex-girlfriend.”

She stared at him, skeptical. “Then what is it about?”

He sighed, “I don’t know...my family, probably. The fact that I was raised by two people who had more affairs than they had honest conversations. My parents despise each other and they have for as long as I can remember. I didn’t exactly have the best example of a stable relationship to look up to. So, over time, my way just seemed easier.”

Felicity nodded, noticing the glimmer of sadness that touched his eyes, the extra effort he put into keeping his smile in place. Of course, she understood that completely. While she had opened up to exes more than Oliver had, she didn’t exactly grow up with the best example of healthy love from her parents, either. 

Noticing the shift in the room, the mood a bit more somber and raw than was common for them, Felicity crossed the space until she was standing next to Oliver. She reached for him, cupping his cheek in the palm of her hand. “I think Laurel and I can agree on one thing, at least,” she mumbled.

“Hm?” Oliver tipped his head towards her hand, his eyes locking on hers. “What’s that?”

“You turned out to be a good man, Oliver Queen.”

At that, he cracked a smile. Just as she’d hoped. And then he moved back to the stove, finishing dinner while Felicity browsed through the magazine again. 

When it was finally, finally, time to eat, she hummed happily, hopping off the stool to follow him to the table. Felicity filled each of their plates with a piece of chicken and a generous serving of roasted carrots and potatoes; delighted with the simplicity of the meal while her mouth also watered from the aromas of his wine sauce. “This looks amazing,” Felicity groaned, sitting down in her chair.

Oliver had disappeared to the other side of the room, turning the radio on for some easy background music. He came back with a matchbook and proceeded to light the candles on the table before dimming the lights.

“Um,” Felicity pinched her lips together, glancing around at the sudden change in atmosphere. “Certainly setting the mood there, huh, Romeo?”

Oliver snorted, taking his seat across from her before reaching over to pat her hand. “Like I keep telling you, sweetheart, I’m going all out this month.”

“It’s really not necessary,” she huffed. They’d gone from a platonic car ride, to flirting in the grocery store, to a serious conversation, to flat out romance in the span of a couple hours (not to mention the incredible sex they’d had just last night), and it was all a little overwhelming, giving her whip lash.

“Listen,” Oliver sighed as he started filling their glasses with the wine she’d picked out at the store. “Maybe once you stop looking so surprised that I know a thing or two about romance, I’ll stop being so over the top. But until then…” he flashed a smile at her, clinking his glass to hers and taking a sip.

She was too hungry to debate Oliver’s romantic instincts. Everything smelled too good to even tease him back. So Felicity just shrugged, focusing on getting the delicious food into her mouth. She moaned as the flavors hit her tongue with the first bite. And then she found herself trying not to inhale her entire plate in one breath. Even as she forced herself to savor it, to eat slowly, they kept the conversation minimal. As soon as her plate was clear, Oliver was serving her seconds. Felicity didn’t even pause, stabbing a carrot with her fork and popping it into her mouth.

Eventually, with her stomach full and happy, Felicity picked up her wine glass and leaned back in her chair. “You did a wonderful job, Oliver. A girl could really get used to meals like that. Seriously, I would willingly commit to a lifetime of your cooking. I mean, as far as this experiment goes, you’ve made your girlfriend very happy.”

He smiled, his dimples appearing, a slight blush rising on his cheeks as she praised him. “Thank you. I’m glad you liked it. Maybe I’ll have to start cooking more and packing you lunches so I know you won’t forget to eat at work.”

“That might actually do the trick,” Felicity laughed, too. 

She wouldn’t deny food like his for the rest of the month. And eating wouldn’t slip her mind if this was what she had to look forward to. Oliver rolled his eyes, “So, how is work, anyway? Palmer asked you to clock in on a Saturday?”

“No,” Felicity shrugged. “He didn’t ask. I just got a little wrapped up in this idea for this piece of tech.”

“Mm,” Oliver hummed, raising his eyebrows as he watched her over his wine glass. “What was it this time? Another DNA tracking system to help catch criminals?”

“No,” she blew out an exasperated breath. “I’ve been thinking about some sort of microchip that could—wait,” Felicity paused, her eyes darting up to him, her face instantly feeling warm. “You remember Archer?”

It was a stupid assignment for a Criminal Justice course she’d taken as an elective in college. They were supposed to come up with a solution to the growing crime rates. And while most of her classmates had focused on their textbook for answers, Felicity dreamed up an entire program(and named it) that would ensure that police were putting the right people behind bars by linking evidence at a crime scene to a DNA database that could find a person from anywhere in the world. She’d argued that people were unreliable, but a scientific solution would never lie. And she’d gotten a B for creativity, but Felicity thought it was bullshit that her professor docked her grade because she didn’t simply write a lame research paper.

“Of course I remember,” Oliver chuckled. “It was just about the most interesting first conversation I’d ever had with a girl.”

She’d been in the campus library one night, working on her project, when Oliver came barging into her study room. He’d introduced himself, explaining that his lab partner wanted to sleep with him and he wasn’t interested, and he needed a place to get a break. Felicity had asked why he felt the need to hide from said lab partner, and he sheepishly admitted that he’d already slept with her once, so the problem was that he didn’t want to tell the poor girl that he didn’t want to sleep with her again.

“I can’t believe you remember that,” Felicity rolled her eyes, shaking her head at him as she recalled how Oliver had started to flirt with her that night by asking what she was working on. He had only been attempting to start a conversation, but it ended with the two of them spending hours in that study room while she explained the details of Archer to him. By the time they left, he’d even offered a few ideas that she put in her project. And he’d insisted that she had to tell him how she did on the presentation.

Of course, it had all been theoretical work, but Felicity had kept talking because Oliver had kept asking questions, looking like he was completely fascinated with every word she’d said.

“How could I forget meeting you?” He gave her a strange look, like he couldn’t believe she was even questioning it. “I knew you were special from the moment you opened your mouth, Felicity. Showed me all the genius stuff you have inside that brain of yours.”

Well, she’d be a robot if those words didn’t pull at her heartstrings.

Felicity stared back at him, basking in the warmth in his eyes. In his words. In the moment. “I remember meeting you too,” she answered slowly. “Even though I thought you were a total jerk at first, I guess there was something about you that stuck out to me. It was the start of a beautiful friendship,” she grinned.

“You know, I don’t really remember meeting many of the people in my life for the first time, especially in college. But with you, it was just… instant. A connection. I wanted to know everything about you.” Her breath caught in her throat as Oliver glanced down at his wine with a distant look in his eyes.

“Yeah,” she choked out, feeling off balance by his admission. By the emotion he was letting her see. By his honesty. “You didn’t want to go back to your lab partner who had the hots for you. I remember that, too.”

Oliver chuckled under his breath, “It was more than that. I knew you were going to be important to me, you know?”

Her head felt light from the wine and his voice. The low, careful way that he was speaking. “Yeah, I know,” she whispered back.

And she did. She remembered every detail of that night. From the moment he stepped into her study room and their eyes met, to when they finally parted ways and he’d given her his phone number, letting her know that he really hoped to hear from her again. 

That night, Oliver had allowed her to see how sweet he was beneath all the bravado.

It was the only reason she reached out to him to get coffee later that week.

And the only reason she continued to spend time with him ever since. He continued to treat her the same way. With respect. With care.

The rest was history.

“I guess sometimes,” Felicity murmured quietly, “when you meet someone who matters to you, there’s a part of you that just knows they’re going to matter. So you remember it.”

His voice was barely above a whisper when he spoke again, just a rumble from his chest, but she heard him. “I remember all of it, Felicity.”

Chapter Text

Someday. 

Someday, she would have her life together enough that every morning didn’t spiral into total chaos. Someday, she’d be a morning person. Someday, she’d be the kind of woman who woke up early, got a workout in, and never had to rush out the door.

But Monday would never be that day. 

Not this Monday. Not any Monday. Because Felicity hated Monday with a passion and always had.

She always struggled to get out of bed on these particularly evil mornings, and it never seemed to matter what she did. Even when she woke up on time and showered quickly, she wound up walking into Palmer Tech at least five minutes late. And on this Monday, she was stuck in traffic and wouldn’t have time to stop for coffee unless she wanted to be really late.

Which was a travesty.

It wasn’t like Felicity, or anyone that worked for Ray Palmer, was at risk of losing their jobs for being a few minutes late. Even if it happened every Monday morning, like it did for her. Mr. Palmer was cool like that, but Felicity hated the idea of her coworkers thinking that she was incompetent. And stumbling through the front doors with her hair falling out of her ponytail wasn’t a great impression.

As she pulled up to a red light, Felicity took a moment to fix the mess on her head, smoothing her hair back into the usual sleek ponytail she wore. Then in the parking lot, she touched up her makeup and her clothes until she was presentable, and hurried inside.

“Good morning, Ms. Smoak,” the receptionist greeted her with a warm smile.

Felicity smiled back, waving as she headed for the elevators.

Typically, she was the last person on her team to arrive, but she was certainly more productive with her day than others. Ray Palmer himself had even expressed an interest in her work.

Who knew, in another year or two, maybe she’d be seeing one of her ideas become a reality.

“Hi, Fel,” Alena greeted her as soon as she noticed her coming down the hall. 

Felicity narrowed her eyes at her friend, out of patience for that nickname she hated as soon as she entered the building. But then she noticed what was in Alena’s hands. “One of those for me?” She asked hopefully, gesturing to the two white coffee cups.

“Mm-hm,” Alena sang. “I thought you might need it.”

“You were right,” Felicity groaned, wiggling her fingers impatiently until Alena handed over the caffeine. Then she sighed, closing her eyes as they reached her office. “Thank you.”

Alena smiled, following Felicity inside. “You’re welcome.” To her credit, Alena waited until Felicity had her coat off, and at least one sip of coffee, before she dove in on an interrogation. “So, how was your weekend? See any charming and ruggedly handsome men I might know?”

Felicity cocked her head to the side, “Tommy Merlyn? I thought you weren’t interested in him.”

Sticking her finger in her mouth, Alena feigned disgust, making Felicity chuckle. “I’m not. Tommy makes me feel like I could catch an STD just by looking at him. Doesn’t Oliver have any cute friends?”

“Eh,” Felicity shrugged. “Sure, but they’re all arrogant douchebags.” She paused, frowning as she looked back at Alena. “Then again, I used to think the same thing about Oliver. You sure you don’t want to give Tommy a chance?”

Alena arched an eyebrow, “I’d rather take my own eyeballs out with a fork.”

“That’s…” Felicity winced. “A disturbing image.”

“Speaking of Oliver–” her friend pushed forward.

“No, we’re not speaking of Oliver,” Felicity pointed a finger at her. “We have work to do. So…Let’s get a move on.” Picking up her coffee cup, she walked back to the door, holding it open as she ushered Alena out.

They walked together down the hallway to the lab where the rest of their team was waiting.

Their team, meaning Curtis Holt, since the division was made up of the three of them. Sometimes they’d be joined by an occasional specialist if they needed one on a certain project. But lately it’s just been the three of them. 

As they entered the lab, Felicity saw that Curtis was already hovering in his area, files laid out neatly on the table in front of him as he waited for her and Alena to arrive. Patient as always. She smiled at Curtis as she walked in, grateful that he’d managed to get their work stations set up and everything in order. “Morning, Mr. Holt.”

Curtis spun around at Felicity’s voice, and she realized that he wasn’t alone in the room. She froze, her heart lurching into her throat at the sight of their intimidating yet handsome CEO. 

She’d spoken to Ray Palmer countless times, seeing as she oversaw one of their most important divisions. But...the guy’s name was on the building. It was hard not to feel a little nervous every time she talked to him.

Mr. Palmer waved as Felicity and Alena approached. “Good morning Ms. Smoak. Ms. Whitlock. I know I typically schedule my visits to the lab, I apologize for dropping in like this. My meeting this morning was postponed to this afternoon, so I thought I’d come take a look at the projects you’ve been working on since I had a free hour.”

“Of course,” Felicity breathed. “Yes, of course. Any time, Mr. Palmer.”

“Please, call me Ray.”

Felicity nodded, “Ray. My team has a few projects in early development we could walk you through. Although I’m sorry it wouldn’t be much of a presentation. We’re still in the early stages of developing a few ideas.”

Ray shook his head, waving her off. “I’m an inventor first and foremost, I don’t need a flashy presentation to be interested, Ms. Smoak. I’d love to hear what you’ve been up to. I’m certain that the plans you updated me on in your emails are even more incredible in person. I was actually excited when my meeting got moved.” He glanced at Curtis and Alena, a wide smile on his face. “It gave me a chance to come down and see you...Um—your team. And your work, of course.”

“Well,” Felicity kept her smile in place, “We’d be happy to give you the tour.”

Luckily, Felicity was good at rolling with the punches. It was part of the reason she was good at her job. Thinking on her feet came with the territory. So once she shook off her initial nerves, she and Alena tag-teamed a quick rundown for Mr. Palmer on the schematics of a navigation system Palmer Tech planned to roll out within the year. And while she and Curtis tended to get carried away with the technology, Alena kept the conversation grounded, chiming in to fill in the details and practicalities.

It took less than thirty minutes to show Ray everything. Well, all the most important and impressive parts, at least. Then he had the rest of his busy schedule to get back to, but not without complimenting the three of them again and saying how happy he was to know that their team was a well-oiled machine. One that he was proud to rely on.

And that turned Felicity’s morning around completely.

For the rest of the day, she and Curtis were bouncing with excitement, while Alena kept her composure for the most part. But even she couldn’t hide the fact that they’d just impressed the hell out of the most important person in the company. 

Their CEO wasn’t just a successful businessman. He was the successful businessman when it came to technological advances all across the country. Felicity was honored to work for Palmer Tech, and she knew that Curtis and Alena felt the same way. For all three of them, it was their dream job. So it floored them for the rest of the day, just knowing that they had Ray’s approval and respect.

Felicity had always known that she was smart. She always knew what she was capable of. Palmer Tech gave her the tools to turn her dreams into a reality. Getting a job there was her first step. Being promoted to lead the team was her second step. And there were still plenty of steps to look forward to. Despite her poor start to the morning, Felicity felt certain that nothing could bring her good mood down.

With fresh motivation, they decided to focus on the navigation project and made quick work of it. Alena even offered to buy her and Curtis lunch to celebrate. And just when Felicity thought her day couldn’t go any better, Oliver texted her and asked if he could bring dinner over to her apartment. Which left her smiling for the rest of the afternoon.

 They agreed on Indian, he promised to be there by 7:00, and Felicity’s good mood made everything else fly by.

When she got back to her apartment later that night, she headed straight inside with plans of getting into some comfy clothes, curling up on the couch with Oliver, and eating all the garlic naan that her stomach could hold. 

Felicity stopped at the front door to pick up the mail, taking it inside with her and throwing it on the kitchen table before she walked down the hall and into her bedroom. Her hair went up into a bun. She put on her favorite pair of yoga pants(the ones that had Oliver’s handprint on the butt from when she had first moved into the townhouse and he’d helped her paint the walls). Then she turned the TV on and started carding through her mail, ignoring most of it to deal with later, until her fingers stumbled over a handwritten letter.

With an Iron Heights Penitentiary stamp across the top.

Felicity froze. Her hands shook as she looked down at the letter she never expected to get. Her breath caught in her throat, the words in front of her the only thing she could see. And her mind began to panic. 

Years. 

She’d made her peace years ago.

What could he possibly want?

And why now?

“Felicity?” Oliver’s voice made her jump, pulling her from her thoughts. She whipped around, her eyes finding him in her doorway. He stood on the threshold of her apartment, their food in one of his hands and his other raised in apology. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you. You didn’t hear me knock?” 

“Uh,” Felicity huffed, dropping the letter and the rest of her pile of mail back on the counter. “No. Sorry, I guess I didn’t.”

Oliver gave her a strange look, taking that as his invitation to come in. He closed the door and moved to the kitchen, setting the bag of takeout on the coffee table. “What’s up with you?” he asked suspiciously as he raised his chin.

“Oh,” Felicity chuckled, sounding breathless even to her own ears. “Nothing. Nothing, I was just…” she waved her hand above her own head, “You know me.” 

Oliver knew better than almost anyone that when she had something on her mind, she tended to have a tunnel vision focus on it. He’d had to snap his fingers in front of her face until she listened on more than one occasion. And sometimes when that didn’t work, he’d resort to gently tugging on her hair until she gave him her full attention.

Cocking his head to the side, Oliver continued to watch her. “Is it work, or something else? You kind of look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

That was an understatement.

She must have jinxed herself; thinking she was having such a great day. Of course something had to come along and ruin it.

But...no. 

No, Felicity wasn’t going to let any ghosts, or their letters, ruin her night with Oliver. This whole month was about avoiding reality anyway, wasn’t it? Fake boyfriend. Fake relationship. Fake dates. 

Her real pain could wait until she’d at least had dinner.

With a quick shake of her head, Felicity shook off her demons and put a smile on her face. “I’m fine,” she promised. 

Felicity reached for the food, taking everything out and bringing it into the living room. She plopped down on the couch while Oliver went to the kitchen for plates and silverware. He handed it all to her before turning back to the kitchen. “Wine?” he called over his shoulder.

“Yes, please!”

Filling each of their plates with a little bit of everything, Felicity groaned at the incredible smells. “You went to Mother India, didn’t you?”

“That’s the one on Sixth Street that you said is your favorite, right?”

“Mmm,” Felicity hummed as the familiar smell filled her nose and her stomach growled in response. “Yes. Impressive memory.”

After her first few months of living in Starling, she’d tried numerous Indian restaurants in search of one that was as good as a place she loved back in Boston. None of them could quite compare to it when she had a craving for butter chicken. But eventually she found Mother India and all was right in the world.

Oliver sat down next to her on the couch, setting their wine glasses next to the plates. “I told you. I remember all of it, Felicity.”

She rolled her eyes, not nearly as affected by that swoon-worthy line of his when he was smirking at her like that. “You’re not as smooth as you think you are,” she teased. “Although, it’s nice that you remembered.”

“Nice, huh?”

His tone made it sound like a bad thing, and Felicity shrugged. “Yes. What’s wrong with that? You are nice.”

“I thought women didn’t like nice .”

Felicity snorted, “You have so much to learn, my friend. So much .” Oliver didn’t answer, his eyebrows furrowing as if he was really thinking about her words. And she sighed, shaking her head at him. “ I like men who are nice. Do you really think we would have kept you around all these years if you were a jerk to me?”

“Well, no,” he huffed. “It’s just...we were friends. It was different.”

“Not when it comes to how you treat me. That part shouldn’t change,” Felicity shrugged. “If this was real, I mean, I wouldn’t want that part to change.”

Oliver nodded slowly, his lips twitching with a smile. “Okay, then it won’t.”

“It better not,” Felicity grumbled back.

His smile ticked up a notch, “It never will.”

As he took his first bite, she watched him out of the corner of her eye. It was easy enough to put the letter out of her mind when Oliver started asking her about her day. And she relaxed even more when he told her about his own Monday troubles.

After they finished eating, both of them leaning into the cushions and their stomachs full, Felicity nudged her shoulder against Oliver’s. “Thank you for dinner.”

He smiled, his eyes skimming over her face. “You kind of make this whole boyfriend thing seem easy.”

“Ah,” she raised an eyebrow at him, “Just wait until I start spending all my time at work and you start flirting with the hot neighbor so you can stop feeling lonely. I think that’s when all relationships start to get messy.”

Oliver chuckled, patting her knee, “You watch too much TV.”

Felicity snorted in response, closing her eyes and resting her head on the back of the couch. She could feel Oliver’s eyes on her, lingering, but she ignored it. 

“You sure you’re okay?” He asked again, gently brushing his thumb across her cheek.

Felicity peeked one eye open and gave him a small smile. “Honestly...not really.” His eyebrows furrowed in concern, but she shook her head before he could ask. “Can we...please not talk about it right now? I just want to relax and hang out with you for a while, okay?”

Even though he still looked worried, Oliver nodded. “Of course. Anything you need.”

Felicity nudged him again. “See?” She said, “When it comes to this boyfriend stuff, you’re a natural.”

Oliver scoffed at that, “I highly doubt that’s it. I just know that trying to get you to talk about something that you don’t want to talk about is a waste of time. You’re the most stubborn person I know.”

“I am not!” Felicity tossed her hand out in his direction, looking at him incredulously as she smacked his chest.

“Hell yeah you are. Take it as a compliment, Smoak.”

Felicity laughed, “I will not be taking stubborn as a compliment any time soon.”

“Persistent?”

She made a face, “Eh.”

“How about headstrong?”

“A little better.”

“Tenacious.”

Felicity smiled, “All right, I’ll allow it.”

He was good at calming her nerves. And she still had no idea if he did it on purpose, or if he was completely unaware of his effect on her.

Once they finally managed to pull themselves off the couch, Felicity cleaned up while Oliver washed the dishes. And once they had that out of the way, they settled in to watch a movie.

He let her pick whatever she wanted to watch. Just like he always did.

Felicity put her feet in his lap, and Oliver pulled the blanket from the back of the couch to cover her legs with it. Just like he always did.

And while the movie began to play, Oliver’s warm hands came to rest on top of her legs as he relaxed into the cushions of her couch. Just like he always did.

It was that moment when it finally hit Felicity that there were some things, certain rituals such as this, that would always just be them. There were no boundaries to define, or lines to cross, or feelings to overanalyze.

She couldn’t define this. She couldn’t fit this feeling into a neat little box. She couldn’t label each side of him as Friend, or Fuck Buddy, or Fake Boyfriend, and then open and close the doors as she pleased.

In moments like this, which she now realized have always existed between them, there was just Oliver. And Felicity. Who they were. How they would always be whenever they’re together. 

There were times when Felicity couldn’t identify how she felt about him. Not because she didn’t know, and not because she was afraid.

It was because...Oliver Queen was never simply one thing to her. He was her best friend, and he was the best sex she’d ever had, and he was the man that she was falling for. He was all of it. All at once.

God, he was everything.

And that had always been a part of them, a layer of their connection that’s been there since they met and would continue to be there no matter what happened next.

Just like Oliver said. I knew you were going to be important to me.

“Oliver,” Felicity choked out, her eyes suddenly swimming with tears as she considered how important he truly was to her. 

Maybe it was the letter, or the moment, or the deal she’d made with Oliver, or maybe it was a combination of everything...But something made Felicity realize that she wanted him to be in her life, for the rest of her life. And with that realization came a gut-reaction that set her stomach in knots, an instinctive fear of losing him.

Oliver glanced away from the screen, his eyes widening at whatever emotion he saw on her face. “What’s wrong?”

“I just...I appreciate you being in my life, and I love you, and I never want to lose you.”

His mouth opened, then closed. 

He stared at her as if he was trying to solve a puzzle, which she couldn’t really blame him for. She was sort of all over the place tonight. “You’re never going to lose me, Felicity.”

She nodded once, blinking back more tears that threatened to betray her.

“Hey,” Oliver paused the movie, then rubbed her leg to get her attention again. “Where is this coming from?”

“I got a letter today,” Felicity blurted out, surprising herself. She knew that the wave of emotion was about more than just the letter, but it was an easy scapegoat in that moment, since she wasn’t sure she had the words to explain the rest.

Oliver raised an eyebrow, waiting for her to continue. 

“From my dad.”

“Wow,” He huffed in surprise. “What did it say?”

Shifting uncomfortably on the couch, Felicity shrugged. This wasn’t something she talked about often. Oliver knew that. Her dad and everything he did was a memory that she preferred to keep locked up tight. But he knew the story. And he knew where Felicity stood. “I haven’t opened it yet.”

“Do you…” Oliver’s grip tightened on her leg, grounding her. His eyes stayed locked on her face, calming her. “Do you want to? I can be here. If you want me to stay, I mean.”

The idea of being alone when she read the letter made her want to throw the thing in the fire and pretend she never saw it. But Felicity also knew that she’d never be able to do that. No matter how much she hated her father, not knowing what  he wrote would drive her crazy. 

“Hell yes I want you to be here,” she sighed, still feeling conflicted. “I’m just not sure I’m ready to open it right now.”

Oliver nodded in understanding, giving her a patient smile. “Well, whenever you’re ready, you just give me a call. I’ll be right here to hold your hand.”

Felicity’s heart warmed at the idea of that. Of course, she has always known that Oliver would be there for her. For anything. He’d always been a reliable friend. He’d always answer her calls, offer advice, and listen to her rant about everything that bothered her.

But maybe there was something else to be said. Something deeper about their connection. Something that went both ways. Maybe she’d just been too afraid to see it.

“Well,” she whispered, “It might take me a long time to build up the courage for...that.”

“Nah,” Oliver patted her leg. “You hate mysteries. Once you have some time to process how you feel, you’ll be ready to face it head on.”

She narrowed her eyes at him, “How are you so sure?”

“You’re tenacious like that, Smoak.”

Felicity couldn’t fight the smile that pulled at her lips. “Thank you.”

Oliver shrugged, “Thank you for letting me be here.”

“Like I said,” she grinned, “You’re weirdly good at this boyfriend thing.”

He let out a small chuckle, “Thank you for that, too. For going along with this...unorthodox take on dating. I couldn’t imagine trying something like this with anyone but you. I’m glad you agreed, Felicity. If it lets me be here for you in this way, then I’m glad you agreed.”

“Mmm,” Felicity sighed, wanting to forget about the letter for now. She’d had a good day. She and Oliver were sharing a nice moment. And she didn’t owe her father a damn thing.

Oliver was right. She would deal with it when she was ready. And he would be there for her whenever that was.

“Well,” Felicity watched him as he watched her. “I’d say it’s going okay so far. You? You’re feeling okay? No sudden urge to run for the hills yet?”

He laughed, “Nope. I feel fine right here.”

Good.

If she was being honest, Felicity wasn’t sure how she would handle it if Oliver decided that ‘dating’ her was too much for him. “Me too,” she smiled. “But you know what would make me feel even better?”

“What?”

In response, Felicity lifted her feet that were still resting in his lap, wiggling them against his chest. Oliver chuckled, shaking his head as she smirked back at him. “You know, when I wrote ‘Massages’ on our list, I was thinking of something a little more...sensual. Like you with your clothes off. In my bed,” he sighed, a slow grin crossing his face, “Maybe some oil involved.”

Felicity’s mouth popped open, “Yeah, now that I think about it, there’s no way we’re doing that.”

“You’re just saying that because you’ve never experienced an Oliver Queen back massage. I’ll change your life, Smoak.”

She narrowed her eyes at him, “Clearly I’d had too much to drink that night if I let you get away with putting that on the list.”

“You didn’t,” Oliver snorted. “If I remember correctly, you made sure to write that I can’t ‘make it weird.’”

Pushing her red-painted toes further up his chest, Felicity giggled. “So, get to it, Mr. Queen. But don’t make it weird.”

Oliver laughed as he plucked one of her feet up and slowly started to massage the sole of her foot with his thumbs. 

Felicity sighed, instant pleasure washing over every inch of her skin that Oliver touched. “I might let you off the hook in a few minutes, but you’re surprisingly good at this. So maybe not.”

“Told you,” Oliver hummed back, his hands sliding up to her toes.

She hummed in agreement as he applied more pressure, her eyes slipping shut. “Best fake boyfriend ever,” Felicity moaned, her head falling back against the cushion of the couch.

Chapter Text

He wasn’t sulking. Well, he was trying not to sulk.

Having a fake girlfriend was strange.

Oliver wasn’t really sure what to do with himself when Felicity wasn’t around. Not that that was anything new, though. He actually relied on that woman so much, he couldn’t remember a time when he didn’t need her advice, or her listening ear, or her company. He couldn’t remember how he’d survived without her.

He would be lost without Felicity. 

And sometimes, that made his plan to enter a fake relationship with her feel like the stupidest thing he could have ever done. He’d suggested it on an impulse that night at Sara and Nyssa’s wedding. 

He hadn’t planned to bring it up. But he’d be lying if he said that the idea of dating Felicity hadn’t crossed his mind before. Of course he’d thought about it. He’d wondered what it would be like. Obviously, he was well aware that she was an amazing woman and he’d be lucky to have her as his girlfriend. That was never the thing that held him back from going for it with his best friend. Rather, it was him. The fact that he had a real talent for damning every good thing in his life to hell.

Felicity Smoak was the exception to that. His friendship with her was the one thing he felt like he got right. He was good at being her friend. He liked that she saw the best in him. And he was rightfully terrified of losing that. Of losing her.

But those thoughts about her became impossible to ignore as the years went on. The older they got, the more he wanted her. In very non-platonic circumstances. Sometimes, those thoughts were of mundane, domestic things. Going to bed with her in his arms. Waking up the same way. Sharing a cup of coffee together before work, and then dinner together after a long day.

The thoughts about her, about a life with her, would assault his mind when he wasn’t expecting it. When he was in the shower, or driving to work, or nursing a beer alone in his penthouse, the images would just be there, pulling themselves from the back of his mind without his permission. And they scared the shit out of him.

Which is why he never brought it up to Felicity, despite the fact that it had been happening for a while now.

Somehow, his mind always seemed to go there.

Actually, it went there much more frequently once they’d started sleeping together. But Oliver also knew that what he’d told her was the truth. He needed to know if commitment and monogamy were really things that he was ready for.  Because if he wasn’t ready for them, then he didn’t want to risk his friendship with Felicity. Just because he could daydream about settling down, didn’t mean he was truly capable of it.

Part of him had always felt like he was too damaged for a real relationship. And he had no idea if he was ready to try.

He had no idea if he was ready for Felicity.

That thought was getting harder and harder to fight off, no matter how much he was trying.

Sara and Nyssa were back from their honeymoon, and apparently that meant ‘girls night’ for Sara, Felicity, Alena, and all of their friends. Which meant that he didn’t get to spend time with his fake girlfriend, so he was stuck at home on a Friday night, with no desire to go anywhere or do anything.

Even though he’d already had lunch with Sara and gotten a chance to catch up with her, he wished he was out with them.

Because it wasn’t his childhood friend that he wanted to spend time with. 

It was his fake girlfriend. 

He only got one month to experience this with Felicity. And he hated how anxious it made him that he couldn’t be with her for every moment of it. He hated how sad it made him to think about the month ending, too.

But there was still time. He still had three weeks. To do what...he wasn’t really sure. He hadn’t exactly thought that far ahead, since he didn’t think Felicity would even agree to his odd idea.

What would happen when their deal was over? When they went back to being friends and nothing more? He was afraid that he’d never be able to go back.

The girls were probably at Verdant, swapping stories and giggling over a few glasses of wine. Some random guy would hit on Felicity. They always did. Except this time, Oliver wasn’t there to glare daggers at the guy until he got lost. This time, Felicity might have had a few too many drinks. And what if Flirty Guy didn’t give up so easily? What if Flirty Guy got pushy with her or refused to take no for an answer? What if Flirty Guy was a creep and Felicity was too nice to tell him to fuck off?

Oh, the more that the thoughts filled his head, the closer Oliver got to driving down there and punching Flirty Guy unconscious.

Until he remembered that Flirty Guy wasn’t real.

Get a grip, Queen.

Groaning, Oliver slumped against his couch, wondering when and how he’d become the type to brood. To dwell. To create false scenarios in his head and then let himself get worked up about them. 

It really wasn’t like him.

He always let things roll off his shoulder. There was no point in brooding or dwelling over things he couldn’t change, right?

And the truth was that Felicity was out with her friends, having a good time. And if he was going to get all jealous and possessive about her, then maybe he was the creep.

Oliver nodded once, content with the self-scolding.

Still, he wished that Felicity was with him.

He’d been looking forward to her coming over for a movie night. They’d had plans, and she’d been so sweet; apologetic about bailing, promising to make it up to him. But of course, Sara had come home from the honeymoon a few days early and Felicity had wanted to see her. 

When he picked his head up, he was looking straight at Bigfoot; the cat having moved to the coffee table to glare at him, judgment in his bright green eyes. 

“I know,” Oliver sighed sympathetically at his companion, raising his hands in surrender. “I’m bummed she’s not here, too.”

Bigfoot meowed, hopping down from the table and sauntering over to his food dishes to pace in circles, waiting to be fed.

Of course, the cat had no idea or expectation of seeing Felicity tonight. He just wanted his dinner. But Oliver liked to think that he wasn’t the only one missing Felicity. That he wasn’t alone in his mood.

Across the room, Bigfoot meowed again, circling the closet where he knew his food was kept. Oliver sighed, putting his beer down and getting up to feed him. In turn, Bigfoot meowed louder, happily swerving between Oliver’s legs.  

“Okay, okay,” Oliver huffed out a laugh as Bigfoot’s noises became more desperate. “I’m coming.”

As soon as the food was in the bowl, the cat went to town, barely taking a breath as he ate it as fast as he possibly could. Oliver shook his head, “Someday you’ll realize that no one is trying to take this stuff from you.” He scrunched his nose at the cat food, “I have no desire to eat that. It’s all yours, buddy.”

Leaving the cat to his business, Oliver took care of his own, picking up his beer bottles and putting them in the recycling bin before grabbing another out of the refrigerator. Then he got started on another load of laundry, grumbling to himself again about his super exciting Friday night plans as he started the washer and dryer. 

After that, with nothing on TV that interested him, he decided to take a shower. 

Once the water was hot, Oliver stripped his clothes off and brought his drink into the shower with him, content between the warm steam and the cool beer.

He stayed in there for a while; until he felt clean and his beer was gone. 

And then he got out, wrapped a towel around his waist, and went back downstairs.

The television was still on and Bigfoot was nowhere in sight, probably off hiding under the bed in the guest bedroom. His favorite spot. Holding the towel in place, Oliver picked up his phone with his free hand, frowning when he noticed a missed call from Felicity. There was also a text, but that was complete gibberish as far as he could tell. She was usually quite efficient with her texting thumbs, but unless she had tried to send him a code of some sort, it looked like she’d mistakenly texted him ‘Oh liver I’m kunepowvas’

Still utterly confused about what she’d meant to say, he was about to give her a call back when he suddenly heard a loud bang from down the hall. 

His head snapped up, realizing it had come from the laundry room. Oliver froze, waiting to see if he heard something else before worrying about finding a weapon, calling the police, or the fact that he was still wet from his shower and only wearing a towel. Really not ready for a fight.

After a moment of silence, there was another noise; this time the distinct sound of the door on his washing machine being slammed shut. And it was shortly followed by a familiar voice saying, “Oh, oops!”

Oliver huffed out a breath of relief. At least he wasn’t being robbed.

Making his way down the hallway, he stopped in the doorway of the laundry room, raising his eyebrows at the sight in front of him.

Felicity stood in the center of the room, her arms raised high, and flailing, as she tried to wrestle one of his shirts over her head. His eyes instinctively flickered down her body, over the bra and panties she wore.

He cleared his throat, and Felicity yelped in surprise.

“Hey, graceful,” he leaned against the doorframe, watching her.

Her arms were still tangled in the sleeves of his t-shirt, her head still stuck in the fabric. “Oh,” Felicity squeaked, “Hi. Um, help?”

Unable to hide his chuckle, Oliver finally had mercy on her, crossing the room to pull the shirt down. It fell to her thighs, regrettably taking away his view of her underwear. But he smiled as he looked down at her face, “Hi. I wasn’t expecting you tonight.”

Felicity grinned back at him. “I know. Sara was going to drop me off at my place, but I told her to take me here instead. I hope that’s okay. I mean, I told her I just wanted to hang out with you. I don’t think she suspects that we’re dating,” her eyes suddenly widened, flying up to look at him. “Fake dating!” She yelled, correcting herself. “Uh, sorry to drop in. I had that key you gave me a few years ago. You said it was for emergencies. Not surprises. But, um, surprise?”

Fighting a smile, Oliver hummed. “It’s okay. This is a nice surprise.”

He sounded all too pleased about it, even to his own ears. But Felicity didn’t seem to notice. Her gaze fell from his face, trailing down his body. “Oh,” she gaped at his bare chest. Her eyes grew wide. “You’re naked. And wet.”

“Yeah,” Oliver nodded. “I was in the shower when you snuck into my apartment.”

“Right,” she mumbled back, her eyes focused on a drop of water that he could feel slipping down his chest. “I don’t suppose you’d want to take another one?”

Oliver cocked his head to the side, taking in her appearance; her messy hair, flushed cheeks, and glossy eyes. Her text, her struggle with his shirt, and her lack of filter.

All the signs were there.

“Are you drunk?”

Her lips twitched with a smile as she lifted her hand, using her index finger to wipe away the drop of water on his body that had been holding her attention. 

Swallowing thickly, he felt a shiver run down his back. “Felicity?”

Drunk Felicity was a flirt.

“Maybe,” she finally answered, her voice low.

Drunk Felicity had a superpower of always getting exactly what she wanted out of him. 

Oh no.

“Can I sleep over tonight?” She asked, biting her lip as she looked up at him, her finger still trailing over his chest.

Drunk Felicity was impossible to say ‘no’ to.

He was in trouble.

“Of course you can,” he huffed.

A smile crept across her face as if she knew exactly what she was doing to him. Like she had him in the palm of her hand. 

Hasn’t she always?

Shit.

The hint of mischief in her eyes cut straight to his heart. Like she knew it, too.

“In your bed?”

Oliver tried to laugh, but it sounded weak and breathless. How was he supposed to do the right thing and tell her that was a bad idea...when her hand was sliding lower down his body. And all the while, the look in her eyes held him hostage.

As Felicity’s fingers reached the towel on his hips, he snapped out of it, sucking in a sharp breath and stepping back before she could reach any lower. “I have a feeling the guest bedroom would be a better plan tonight.”

She frowned at that, slowly shaking her head. “You don’t want to have sex with me?”

God. Damn. It.

“Of course I want to.”

The crease between her eyebrows deepened, “Well, I want to have sex with you, too.”

“Honey, you’re drunk. And I thought we took sex off the table. At least until the month is up.” He smiled, trying to tease, but the look on Felicity’s face made it obvious that she wasn’t having any of it.

Felicity pouted up at him. Then she closed the distance between them, her hands landing on his waist. “But remember, you said it yourself…” she pushed up onto her toes, her body pressing against his as she leaned in to whisper in his ear, “I liked it when you fucked me on the table.”

Oliver shivered, his breath catching in his throat. And his body instantly responded to the words, the sexy tone of her voice, and her lips brushing against his ear. He gripped the towel tighter, keeping his voice stern as he said, “Felicity, you’re drunk. There’s not a chance in hell that we’re having sex tonight.”

Felicity quickly leaned back, and Oliver didn’t realize how aggravated he seemed until he saw the look on her face. Shocked, wide eyes stared up at him. And then her lip instantly started to tremble.

Fuck. He forgot that Drunk Felicity was also sensitive as all hell.

“Okay,” she whimpered as she removed her hands and dropped her head. “I’m sorry...I’ll sleep in the guest room.” Without meeting his eyes again, Felicity slipped past him, hurrying out of the room. “Or maybe I should just go home. Do you want me to just go home?”

Oliver stood frozen for another moment. Hearing the hurt in her voice literally made his heart feel tight. What the hell was this woman doing to him?

With a long sigh, he left the laundry room. “No,” Oliver called after her. “Stay.” She was still hesitant as he walked closer. “I don’t want you to leave, okay?” 

Bigfoot made his appearance then, plopping himself down right onto Felicity’s foot and rolling onto his back. She smiled as she looked down at the cat, bending over to rub his belly. 

“Just…” Oliver let out a deep breath. “Go on upstairs. I’ll be there in one minute.”

She bit her lip as she looked back at him, still unsure. Oliver smiled as he closed the distance between them. Reaching out to tuck her hair behind her ear, he whispered, “Stay.”

Felicity finally nodded in agreement. Then she scooped up Bigfoot and headed for the stairs. Shaking his head, Oliver made his way to the kitchen to get her a glass of water and some aspirin, then he followed her up.

She was in the guest bedroom, sitting on the edge of the bed while she slowly ran her fingers through Bigfoot’s fur. From his spot on Felicity’s lap, Bigfoot was purring loudly. He noticed Oliver’s presence before Felicity did, and the cat looked entirely unimpressed at the sight of him.

After another moment, Felicity seemed to realize that Bigfoot had stopped purring in favor of glaring at Oliver in the doorway. She glanced up at him, still looking wary of him as she chewed on her bottom lip. She looked so innocent. Sweet. And he couldn’t imagine falling asleep without her in his bed.

Just like that, all of his resolve was gone. “Come on,” Oliver said, lifting the water and aspirin. “Come stay in my room. As long as you’re on your best behavior. No funny business, Miss Boozy.”

She nodded back, carefully setting the cat back on the bed and then following Oliver out. She brushed by him as he flicked off the lights, and Oliver rolled his eyes at Bigfoot when the cat stretched out on the guest bed, already falling asleep in his favorite spot.

Walking into his own room, he tried not to stare at Felicity while she pulled the comforter back and slipped beneath the sheets. He didn’t say a word as he moved to his dresser and took a clean pair of boxers from the top drawer. Then he called on all of the control he had left, fully aware of Felicity’s eyes on his backside as dropped the towel and pulled the briefs on. When he turned around, his heart immediately began to race.

Felicity was lying in his bed. Wearing his shirt. Watching him.

They’d done so many things in that bed. Touched each other in so many zealous, desperate ways. Yet he couldn’t think of a moment that felt more... intimate than the one he found himself in right then. With Felicity’s sleepy eyes trained on him while he got dressed in front of her. As if this was something they did. As if getting ready to go to bed together was a regular occurrence. As if they shared a bed every night, not just when it was convenient.

It felt just like how he secretly hoped it would feel.

But thanks to his ‘dating’ idea, it wasn’t real.

Suddenly frustrated with himself; the fact that he was feeling these things for her and had never had the balls to say something sooner, Oliver slapped his hand over the lightswitch, turning the light off. Then he shuffled over to the bed, trying to ignore Felicity’s presence as he climbed in on his side.

His side. 

Even in his thoughts, Felicity owned these pieces of his life that he couldn’t explain. A side of his bed. A place in his home. She even had an eternal spot in the heart of his grumpy cat. 

It was as if over the years, Felicity slowly took residence in every part of his life. Yet the strangest part about it was that Oliver couldn’t think of a single second where he didn’t want her there. As someone who joked about being allergic to commitment, it probably should have raised a few red flags; the way he always wanted to be near her, the fact that he never grew sick of her, the reason that he was attached to her now.

Not once had he ever wished that they weren’t as close. 

Not once had he ever pulled away from her.

In fact, sometimes he wished that they were even closer.

Which...might be how they ended up in bed together in the first place. And it was probably the reason he suggested this little experiment.

Even though he didn’t want to admit what that meant...

Oliver wanted to tell Felicity all of that. If anyone could help him sort through his feelings, it was her. He just wasn’t sure if it was the best idea to bring it up to her. ‘Hey, by the way, I’ve been having these super confusing feelings for you for a long time now. Can you help me figure out what it means? Maybe just let me know how I’m supposed to feel about you?’

She would kill him. And she was drunk. It was probably the worst time to bring it up, anyway. 

“Are you mad at me?”

Oliver’s eyes snapped open, her voice pulling him from his own thoughts. He blinked in confusion. Mad?

He was sexually frustrated and emotionally exhausted, sure. But… “No,” Oliver whispered back. “I’m not mad at all, honey. And definitely not at you.”

“You’re not upset that I came over here uninvited?”

“No!” Oliver exclaimed, somewhat offended. He turned over to face her, already shaking his head. “You are always, always, always welcome here, Felicity. No invitation necessary. That’s why I gave you that elevator key in the first place.” He smiled, “I’m happy that you finally used it. And I’m happy you’re here.” 

Felicity offered a tired smile back, nestling her face into her pillow. “Okay. Good...I was afraid I ruined your plans or something.”

He snorted, “I’m spending my Friday night at home alone, doing laundry, drinking beer in the shower, and hanging out with Bigfoot. Trust me, you’re a welcome addition here.”

Her smile widened, her eyes slipping shut. “I like being here.”

Oliver reached across the bed, gently sweeping her hair back, out of her face and off her shoulder. “I’m not upset with you at all, okay? The opposite, actually. Look...I have a very hard time saying ‘no’ to you. Especially when you’re asking me to have sex with you and giving me that sexy smile of yours.”

“I have a sexy smile?”

“You…” Oliver groaned as she smiled again. “You have a sexy everything, Felicity.”

“I do?”

He scoffed, unable to fathom that she didn’t already know his answer to that. “I just need you to show me a little mercy here,” he sighed. “Or else this month of not fucking you is going to be a total failure.”

Well, he’ll probably feel like a failure no matter what happened. But that was his problem. As long as Felicity kept spending time with him this month, he could deal with the ‘no sex’ thing.

The room grew quiet. 

Felicity didn’t respond or open her eyes.

Oliver stared down at her face, realizing she fell asleep. He sighed again, closing his own eyes, content to spend the night just like this. Knowing that she was close to him. Safe. His hand slid to her shoulder, his thumb rubbing absently across her collarbone while he watched her.

It didn’t take him long to fall asleep, succumbing to the peaceful sounds of Felicity breathing. 

But he felt like he’d only dozed off for a few minutes before he was jolted awake again. Apparently he’d fallen asleep just like that; his face a few inches from Felicity’s, his hand still on her shoulder. He woke up when she shoved his hand away. 

Oliver gasped, his eyes flying open. “What–” He mumbled in confusion, blinking through the darkness, trying to get his senses back to see what Felicity was doing. He could hear her grumbling as she moved away from him, retreating to her side of the bed. “Hey,” he frowned, “what’s wrong?”

He’d just caught sight of her, a blurry mess of blonde hair as she rolled over to face the opposite way, when something; soft, cotton material, suddenly landed right on his face. Oliver grunted in surprise just as Felicity sighed in relief and grumbled, “Too hot.”

Still half asleep and utterly lost, Oliver pulled the clothing off his face. He stared at it in the darkness for a moment, recognizing his own t-shirt.

Then he choked on his next breath as he remembered it was the same one Felicity had pulled from the dryer earlier. The one she’d gone to sleep in.

His head snapped in her direction, realizing that underneath the waves of blonde hair, she was topless. 

Felicity’s eyes were closed again, her mouth hanging open. It was hard to see her in the darkness of the room, but he could tell that she was laying on her stomach, the blanket resting low on her back, exposing plenty of skin to his receptive gaze. 

And he was very awake.

“Oliver,” she suddenly grumbled, squinting one eye open to look directly at him. “Stop staring.”

 “What happened to being on your best behavior?”

Felicity grinned, “What’s the problem? Nothing you haven’t seen before.”

Right. 

Little did she know, the sight of Felicity Smoak naked had been making his heart beat wildly for months.

He clenched his teeth, being vigilant that he didn’t sound too harsh as he replied, “Just go back to sleep, Felicity.”

“Whatever,” she rolled her eyes. “I’m not asking you to have sex with me. It’s just hot in here. Relax, okay?”

Oliver grunted in response, reaching over to pull the blanket up to her neck, covering the exposed skin of her back. 

Felicity opened her eyes again just to pout at him, “I don’t know why you’re being so modest about my boobs, Oliver.” Slowly turning onto her side, with her back to him, she bent her knee, tilting her head to look over her shoulder at him. And the sheet slipped lower with the movement, revealing the soft, milky curve of her thigh. Her hip. Her back was in full view, the blanket barely covering her butt.

“I know you’re more of an ass guy,” she murmured. 

Oliver let out a sharp breath. She wasn’t wrong there. Especially not when it came to her ass. 

But he loved her breasts, too. They fit perfectly in his palms. He loved when she would arch her back, urging him to roughly knead her flesh. Or how hard her nipples would get when he tugged on them. Sucked on them.

“Keep this up,” he grit out, “and you’ll be sleeping alone while Bigfoot and I share the guest bed.”

Her smile fell as she flipped onto her back again. This time, she pulled the sheet up on her own, her hands holding it against her chest to cover herself. Thank god.

But then Felicity narrowed her eyes at him. “You are absolutely no fun, you know that?”

“Well, clearly I’m the only one here who is thinking about the promise we made not to sleep with each other, so I’ll care enough about keeping it for both of us.”

“Oliver Queen, world class flirt, can’t take a little teasing?”

He narrowed his eyes right back at her. “Not right now, when I’m horny as fuck. And not from you, when you’re the one making me horny as fuck.”

Her eyes widened, “I am?”

Oliver growled, “Yes.”

Felicity blinked up at him a few times, the words registering. And then she smiled; a wide, bright, goofy smile. “I’m making you horny,” she sang, her head bobbing happily.

Oliver leveled her with an unimpressed look, and Felicity pinched her lips together. “Fine, I’ll stop. But there is something I want to try tonight. From the list.”

That got his attention. 

Oliver raised an eyebrow, “And what would that be?”

“Cuddling,” she answered, her expression hopeful as she stared back at him. But Oliver paused, unsure if she’d be asking for that if she was sober. Was that really what she wanted, or was that the alcohol talking? 

The last thing he wanted was for them to wake up with any awkwardness between them in the morning.

Well...she did add it to the list when she’d been mostly sober. Yet...Oliver still hesitated.

He wasn’t a cuddler.

Actually, he kind of had a rule against it. He’d fallen asleep with Felicity in his arms after sex before. But they would always wake up on opposite sides of the bed. At some point, just after she’d fall asleep but before he’d give into it himself, it would start to feel...intimate. Too intimate. 

Whenever they fell asleep like that, it felt like he had everything important in his life right there in his arms. And she was vulnerable, and precious, and it was his job to protect her.

Every time she stayed over...cuddling would simply feel like it was too much. It felt more important than he was prepared for. Too many emotions that he wasn't capable of processing. So he would gently untangle himself from her embrace, always careful not to wake her.

Not that Oliver would ever tell Felicity to leave. Not that he ever wanted her to leave. But there would be that moment. One where he’d pull away and retreat to his own side of the bed.

And in the morning, neither of them would mention the fact that they woke up on their own, only sharing a bed but not one another.

When Felicity added ‘cuddling’ to their list, Oliver had a feeling that that was exactly why. 

“I want you to cuddle me,” Felicity groaned. “Please?”

“Cuddle you?”

“Yes.”

“Okay,” Oliver let out a shaky breath. “On one condition…” He nodded once before sitting up, searching the bed until he found the shirt that she’d discarded. He held it up before tossing it to her. “You put this back on.”

She scrunched up her nose, glancing down at the shirt when it landed in her lap. 

Like the adorable drunk that she was, Felicity didn’t seem to care that he was still watching her as she lifted his shirt to her nose to smell it. She pulled the shirt over her head, “M’kay.”

Laying back down, Felicity closed her eyes, turning her nose towards her shoulder again to smell the fabric. “C’mon,” she sighed, patting the bed behind her as she settled onto her pillow. “Lay down.”

Drunk Felicity was pushy too, apparently.

Oliver shook his head in amusement. Then he took his place on the bed next to her, and she instantly pushed back until their bodies met. Felicity made herself comfortable, her back plastered to his chest. 

With a satisfied sigh, she wiggled her ass against him, urging him to hold her closer. And Oliver couldn’t help but chuckle, relaxing as he rubbed his nose against her neck. Felicity hummed, “Be here when I wake up, okay?”

A strange sense of peace washed over him and he nodded in agreement. “I will.”

Chapter Text

The first thing that Oliver noticed upon waking up the next morning was a stifling, overwhelming heat.

Felicity was latched onto him like a koala; her head tucked beneath his chin, her arms wrapped around his neck, and her legs tangled in his.

Which he honestly didn’t mind.

But she’d also managed to cover them, from head to toe, under his comforter. And he needed air.

Tossing one arm out of the sweltering cocoon, Oliver pulled the blanket down to free his face, and took a deep breath. Then he squinted his eyes open to look down at Felicity.

Instantly, it brought a smile to his face.

She looked like a hungover mess. Her hair was everywhere. The mascara that she must have forgotten to remove was smudged across the skin beneath her eyes. Her mouth was hanging open and he was pretty sure she had drool on her chin.

She looked perfect.

As he watched her, Felicity sighed, squeezing him even more. Oliver huffed out a breath, realizing that nearly every part of her body was touching him somehow. He wasn’t even sure how that was possible, but Felicity found a way to make sure he kept his word.

Cuddling.

All night.

Clothes on.

By the looks of it, he had tried to back off at some point during the night. They were both on his side of the bed, as if he had retreated in his sleep, and she had followed.

He always liked his own space when he was sleeping. In fact, the situation that Felicity had going on in that moment...that was exactly the kind of thing he had always hated. 

Something could probably be said about that. The fact that he didn’t like this kind of affection. Feeling physically smothered and emotionally smothered all at once. 

And the way that Felicity was wrapped around him definitely felt like smothering. Yet...in a good way somehow? 

He felt protected, as if nothing could get to him when they were like this.

He felt needed, as if he was the only man in the world who was capable of holding her while she slept.

He felt... loved.

And it felt good. Oliver laid still for a long time. He didn’t do anything but watch her face as she dreamed, slowly tracing his hand up and down her spine.

It must have gone on for nearly an hour. Nothing in the room had changed, but eventually Felicity started to wake up, pulling him out of the strange spell he’d so easily fallen into.

She picked her head up from his chest, her eyes roaming over him in confusion, and then moving around the rest of the room. He bit his lip, waiting for her to remember the night before.

After another moment, Felicity groaned, dropping her forehead to his chest. “I was an idiot last night.”

“No,” Oliver couldn’t help but smile. “You were a drunk idiot last night.”

Felicity carefully lifted her head to glare at him, “Asshole.”

He chuckled, moving her hair out of her face. “How are you feeling?”

“Like I shouldn’t have listened to Sara when she told me to try every flavor of margarita on the menu,” Felicity grumbled back.

“Hm,” Oliver hummed. “Last time Sara got you drunk, you said you’d never listen to her when she tells you to take tequila shots.”

Felicity let out another groan, hiding her face on his chest again. “I need to start keeping a list of things not to let Sara talk me into ever again.” 

He gently patted her head, having enough sympathy to feel bad but not enough to stop himself from laughing. “How about I make you breakfast?”

She sighed, shaking her head. “It’s too much, Oliver. I’m sorry I ambushed you last night and made you take care of me.”

As if he wasn’t already moping and wishing she was with him by the time she dropped by.

“Hey,” he nudged her head to get her to look at him. “You can always come here. Always. For anything. I don’t care what the circumstances are, okay?”

She closed her eyes, “Also I’m sorry that I forced you to cuddle with me all night.” 

Oliver snorted, “Don’t be. I liked it.”

“You did?” She asked, sounding genuinely surprised. 

He nodded back, glad that she knew. Felicity had obviously spent the night in his bed before. Despite the things they’d done together, they didn’t cuddle. He never thought that Felicity cared, though. They could have sex, they could share a bed, they could talk, they could wake up in the morning and have breakfast together before she went back to her place. But they didn’t cuddle. He always thought that it would just make things...too intimate.

But it was clear now that Felicity didn’t have as big of an issue with it as he did. Clearly, she enjoyed this. And he hated to think that he had denied her of something she enjoyed. Especially after sex. If Felicity Smoak wanted to cuddle, then damn it, he would cuddle.

“Don’t tell anyone,” he pulled her closer, “but I think you’ve turned me into a snuggler.”

Felicity grinned at that. “Well, you’re a pretty good snuggler if I do say so myself.” 

“Yeah?”

She adjusted her head on his shoulder, moving so she could look up at him. “Yeah,” she whispered back. And as their eyes met, he felt that closeness. The intimacy he’d been so afraid to feel. His breath caught in his throat. His heart literally felt like it skipped a beat when he looked into her eyes, watched them soften right in front of him. 

In a moment like that, with a woman like her, it was impossible to remember that he was supposed to be controlling himself. That they had rules. He couldn’t even remember his own name. And Oliver found himself moving towards her, following the natural instinct he felt.

He had to kiss her. 

“Fe-li-ci-ty…” he hummed her name, his head tilting to catch her mouth.

A soft moan escaped her, her eyes flickering shut as he slowly nuzzled her nose with his own.

Just as his lips slanted against hers, the faintest touch, Felicity jerked her head back.

Oliver gasped, his eyes snapping open as her unexpected movement shattered the moment. She stared at him for a split second, her eyes going wide. “I have to get to work!” Felicity squeaked out. Then she quickly scrambled to untangle herself from him.

“It’s Saturday,” Oliver mumbled in confusion.

Felicity didn’t slow down, struggling to get her legs out from underneath his. And he was too dumbfounded to help. “Why didn’t you wake me up!?” She accused, kicking his feet away from hers.

He finally moved, letting her go. “It’s Saturday!” He said again, defending himself.

After wrestling to free herself from the blankets, she scrambled off the bed, mumbling something under her breath as she hurried out of the room. With a frown, Oliver pushed up onto his elbows and stared after her. “What...just happened?”

Apparently, the sacredness of a Saturday morning meant nothing to Felicity Smoak. By the time he caught up with her downstairs, she was fully dressed and running around his apartment in search of her purse. 

Oliver spotted it on the couch almost immediately, hidden beneath Bigfoot where he was silently watching and judging both of them. He sighed before walking across the room and nudging the cat off so he could get it. “Felicity,” Oliver huffed out a breath as she grabbed the purse from his hand and breezed by him again. 

She made a noise, acknowledging him with one look, but then she was moving again, trying to find her shoes while she worked on getting her hair into a ponytail.

“Do you really have to go into work?” Oliver bit his lip, “Or...?”

Felicity shot him a look over her shoulder, “Of course I do. Why would I make that up?” She found one of her shoes by the door and slipped it on, not looking at him again as she continued to search for the other.

“Because I was about to kiss you,” he grumbled back.

He’d tried to kiss her, and now she was literally running out of his penthouse. It wasn’t hard to connect the dots.

She stopped, turning to look at him again. “I do have to work,” she sighed, her shoulders slumping. “But...Oliver, we said we wouldn’t do that and it’s only been a week and we already almost did it.” The words rushed out of her, “And I know part of that is my fault because I showed up here drunk, and I wanted to sleep in your bed with you, and I’m pretty sure I remember taking my clothes off and you being the perfect gentleman, but I…we agreed that we would keep this PG, you know? I don’t want to confuse ourselves here. We said we would put the physical stuff on the shelf. Right? That’s what we said. No sex, no kissing, none of that messy shit that would just ruin things between them.”

If what they were doing had the potential to ruin things between them, then why was it starting to feel like it was exactly what they needed?

He blinked back at her, “I know. I’m sorry.”

Felicity closed her eyes. “No,” she slowly shook her head. “Please don’t be sorry.”

“I’m not sorry for wanting to kiss you, Felicity,” he clarified. “Or even for almost breaking the rules for this month. But I am sorry that I’ve let you believe it would ruin what we already have...if there was something more between us.”

She stared at him for a long moment, her eyebrows furrowing. 

And he knew he’d said too much.

From across the room, she stared at him with wide, confused eyes. 

And he knew that in that moment, he could change everything.

All he had to do was open his mouth and tell her that things could only get better between them. That they could take the next step forward, together, and never look back.

God...he wanted to tell her all of that. 

But he knew that he couldn’t.

Oliver bit his tongue. Because he wasn’t quite sure if he believed it yet himself.

Taking a breath to compose himself, he broke their eye contact. There was still time to figure this shit out. His shit. With his eyes low, Oliver noticed that Felicity’s shoe was tucked between the couch cushions, out of sight because Bigfoot had his tail laid over it. 

The cat glared up at him as if he knew he’d spotted it.

“Here,” Oliver cleared his throat, gently shoving Bigfoot aside and retrieving the shoe.

Felicity didn’t respond, her eyes still on him. So Oliver crossed the room, leaning down again to help her step into the shoe. Her hand slid over his shoulder for balance as he eased it onto her foot. And then he looked up at her face, raising an eyebrow when he saw that she was still watching him carefully, almost in a daze. He had no idea what was going through that brain of hers, and he was too afraid to ask. “You should probably get going then,” he whispered instead.

Another silent moment passed between them. Felicity eventually nodded, “Yeah, I’m going to be late.”

He stood up. She put her coat on. And after a rather stiff hug, she left.

Oliver spent the next couple of hours cleaning the entire penthouse...and worrying that Felicity might be upset with him. He shouldn’t have said what he did. He shouldn’t have alluded to the fact that he had hope for them. That he could imagine a future with her.

Keeping things simple and uncomplicated was the only way he could keep Felicity. If she thought that he wanted more from her, she would run.

He’d watched her do it with other relationships. She found flaws in all of the men who fell for her. She pushed them away before they could hurt her. And he knew that the only reason she kept him in her life was because he didn’t pose that same threat. Since they were friends, she didn’t have to put her walls up when it came to him. He’d always enjoyed being that man for her. The one she could rely on. The constant.

But...if he risked hurting her, he doubted that it would end any differently for him than it did for those other poor idiots who tried to win her heart.

This new agreement was an experiment. But it was probably time to admit to himself that...he might’ve had an ulterior motive. 

Oliver had always struggled to connect with anyone emotionally. That was for sure. But Felicity struggled to connect with anyone long-term.

At the very least, he just wanted Felicity to see that being in a relationship wasn’t so bad. And maybe he wanted to prove that to himself, too.

After he finished cleaning everything that could be cleaned, he took a shower and then pulled out his laptop and tried to catch up on a few of his emails from the week before. Unfortunately, he just couldn’t sit still. It wasn’t long before he gave up on the emails and turned to the kitchen instead.

His love for cooking was something that he didn’t really discover until after he’d graduated college and moved back to Starling. It started out of boredom, but after a few attempts and failures, and many moments where he’d found himself mindlessly watching some cooking show on TV, he began to enjoy it more. Being in the kitchen relaxed him, even when the finished products were barely edible. In the last year or so though, he’d really found his talent for it.

Enough so that he had added ‘cooking’ to his and Felicity’s list and insisted on making her dinner the other night. Just to show off.

But on this particular morning, Oliver just needed it to help him keep busy. So he pulled out all of the ingredients he needed for homemade banana nut muffins and let the tasks distract him. It wasn’t until he was pouring a few generous handfuls of chocolate chips into the batter that he remembered they were Felicity’s favorite.

Even subconsciously, he aimed to please her.

Oliver sighed, rolling his eyes at himself as he finished up and got the muffins in the oven.

When they were almost ready and his apartment smelled like warm heaven, he texted Felicity and asked her if she’d eaten. She responded right away, telling him no, she hadn’t. Oliver texted back to let her know that he could stop by in twenty minutes with breakfast, to which he received an enthusiastic ‘YES PLEASE!!!!’ in response.

Once the timer went off, he packed up the muffins and headed out, grabbing some coffee on his way to Felicity.

The security guard in the lobby of Palmer Tech opened the door for him when he pulled up, offering a polite nod as he gestured to the elevators. Oliver waved back, assuming that Felicity must have informed him she was expecting someone. 

He made his way upstairs and through the empty hallway of her floor, finding her office easily since he’d visited her at work a couple of times before. Although in the past, the building was bustling with people. The silence of such a place would probably seem creepier if he wasn’t familiar with an empty office building on weekends and late nights for his own job. 

As Oliver rounded the corner to Felicity’s office, he saw her right away. His hand froze where he’d been about to knock, taken aback by the sight of her. 

She sat behind her desk, wearing a pair of dark blue jeans and a pink sweater. She had her glasses on and her hair in its typical ponytail. Her legs were tucked underneath her, her feet bare, her shoes lying on the floor beneath the desk. And she had a pen in her mouth, absently chewing on it while she stared at the files in front of her.

Everything about her gave him a familiar, yet staggering, sense of calm. Comfort.

Home.

Before that thought could really throw him for a loop, Felicity glanced up, noticing him in the doorway. She instantly started to smile, and when she saw the container of muffins in one of his hands and the carrying tray of coffees in the other, she groaned. “Hi, hi! Oh, this is the best thing I’ve seen all day. Thank you. What’d you bring?”

He smiled back, “Banana nut muffins.”

“With chocolate chips?”

Oliver’s smile widened, “Of course.” He came inside and set everything down on the table by the window. And Felicity got up to join her, bare feet padding across the room. They each sat down on the couch, and Oliver couldn’t help but chuckle when Felicity bypassed the coffee and reached for the muffins first. 

“What?” She asked, licking her lips as she looked over the muffins.

He pointed to the cups, “It’s not often that I see you choose anything over coffee.”

She laughed, “These are my favorite.”

Letting out a soft breath, he answered, “I know.”

Felicity narrowed her eyes at him as she took a bite. Oliver pursed his lips to keep his smile at bay. He could spend the next month cooking her every meal as long as it made her happy. And as long as it ensured that she would eat. Because he knew that too often, she forgot.

“So,” Felicity said once half of her muffin was gone. “What’s next?”

He cocked his head to the side, unsure what she meant. “Next?”

“On the list,” Felicity clarified. She picked up her cup of coffee and took a sip, waiting for an answer.

Oliver sighed. He had no idea, he was still shocked that they were even doing this. That she even agreed to do this. But his honest answer was that he didn’t care. Felicity could ask him to do pretty much anything, on or off the list, and he would probably say yes.

God...he was screwed.

Clearing his throat, Oliver gave a noncommittal shrug. “Whatever you feel like doing is fine with me.”

If it means spending more time together, it will definitely be fine with him.

Felicity was watching him over her coffee, “I have an idea.” 

“Hm?” 

“Let’s do an item on the list right now.” 

He paused, his muffin halfway to his mouth, “Right now?” 

She grinned back at him with a hint of mischief in her eyes, “Sure. Why not?” “Um...which one?” 

It was too embarrassing to say out loud, but everything they’d come up with left him wanting more. It was a list of carefully planned romantic moments. Her office on a Saturday morning wasn’t exactly the setting he had in mind. Oliver wanted to make sure every item on the list went perfectly. He didn’t want to waste them.

“Well,” Felicity stood up suddenly, walking back to her desk to find her purse. She reached inside and pulled out the familiar piece of paper, “How about—” 

“You carry that around in your purse?” He interrupted.

She lifted her head to send him a glare, then focused on the list again. “Sharing secrets?” 

Oliver raised an eyebrow, “Here? Now?” 

Felicity laughed, “Were you planning on confessing to murder?” 

“No,” he grumbled. She’d already crushed his hope for his ‘massages’ addition to the list when she insisted that an innocent foot rub the other night was good enough to count. He didn’t know what he expected out of the ‘sharing secrets’ thing, but he thought that they would take more time and care as they worked their way through the list, at least.

Still, Felicity was staring at him expectantly, waiting for him to respond.

“Your idea, you go first,” he huffed out a breath.

She rolled her eyes, “Always so chivalrous. Hm...” tapping her finger against her chin, she thought about it. “Okay...I have one. You’re going to laugh…” 

His interest piqued when her cheeks flushed red.

“Remember when you introduced me to Sara?” Felicity asked. Oliver nodded, wondering where she was going with this. “I think it must have been a week or so after we met. It was at her apartment in Boston. She was having friends over and you wanted me to tag along…”

“Yeah,” he chuckled, remembering the way he’d had to beg and plead with Felicity to meet his friends. Even then, he’d known that Felicity Smoak was one of the best people he’d ever met, and part of him wanted his friends to see that, too. But Felicity was stubborn. She wasn’t one for big crowds and parties, so at first, the best he could get from her was study sessions and coffee breaks. “It took a lot of convincing,” Oliver sighed. “You didn’t seem too eager to make new friends.”

“I was scared to meet the people you called friends. You were enough of a handful all on your own.” She teased, sticking her tongue out at him. He rolled his eyes, and she continued, “But anyway...that night, when you brought me over to their apartment and introduced me to everyone...Sara...um, she told me that...uh, she thought you had a thing for me.”

He froze, “She did?” 

“Yep. She did. She said she’d never seen you as happy with a girl as you were with me. And she was quite convinced that you were going to ask me out.” Felicity snorted, shaking her head as if the idea was ridiculous.

And Oliver felt the air leaving his lungs, his face paling. Because Sara had been completely right. He’d had a thing for Felicity. As soon as they’d met in the library, he’d wanted to ask her out. And when they continued to hang out after that, he would always have to convince himself not to do it.

Once Felicity met his friends and started to become a part of their group, it got a little easier. He realized that it was for the best. That they were better as friends, anyway. Because he couldn’t lose her as long as they remained platonic.

Friends kept her in his life.

And he’d lived by that belief ever since.

Oliver choked on his next breath, “Why didn’t you ever tell me that?” 

Why didn’t Sara ever tell him that? 

If Sara thought he liked Felicity back then, why didn’t she ever call him out? Sara Lance had always called him out. For everything. The girl’s favorite past-time was calling him out on all of his shit. So why didn’t she push him about Felicity? Maybe if she had…

“Because you didn’t ask me out. We became friends instead,” Felicity shrugged. “And I figured it was better off that way.”

Well...at least they were on the same page about that.

The question now...was whether or not they’d both been wrong.

Or maybe if friendship simply wasn’t enough anymore.

“So that’s your secret?” He whispered, setting his food on the table and looking back at her, his appetite gone. “Sara told you that I had a crush on you when we first met?”

By asking the question, he knew that he was confirming the truth. He did like her when they were first getting to know each other, as more than a friend.

Hell, that never actually went away.

All he’d done was suppress it because he didn’t want to lose her.

And now he was paying for it.

Her eyes widened slightly, understanding. “So...Sara was right?”

“Hell yeah she was right,” Oliver huffed. No point in lying now.

Felicity whimpered, a tiny, almost remorseful sound, and dug her teeth into her bottom lip. “Well...that’s not my secret. My secret is that—after Sara said all of that, I thought, maybe...If you had asked me out back then, I would have said yes.”

His heart clenched in his chest; not knowing whether to feel relieved that he wasn’t alone in that crush all those years ago, or remorseful that they’d never know what would have happened if they’d just taken the chance on each other back then.

Maybe things wouldn’t be as complicated as they are now.

Letting out a shaky breath, Oliver mumbled, “You would have?”

At that, Felicity gave him a strange look. “Yeah,” she said, as if the answer was obvious. “I mean, in hindsight I’m actually glad you never asked me to go out with you. We still barely knew each other at the time. Who knows how that could have turned out.” 

“Right,” Oliver replied weakly. As far as he was concerned, it had to have been a better option than this. Maybe if they’d just gone for it in college, they’d be together now. Happily together. Truly together.

“I like where we are now,” Felicity spoke clearly, raising her eyebrows at him, like she knew exactly where his mind had gone. “I just...I would have said yes. That’s my secret.”

Oliver sat perfectly still for another moment, somewhat shell-shocked. 

Well, if Felicity wanted to open Pandora’s box...he could, too. 

“Okay. You want to know my secret?”

“Yes,” she answered slowly, her voice skeptical.

“Ever since we hooked up for the first time, I haven’t slept with anyone besides you.”

He caught her mid-sip of coffee, and apparently it was enough of a surprise to make her start coughing on the liquid. Oliver sighed, gently patting her back. Once she recovered, her wide eyes swung up to meet his, “Oliver, that was over three months ago.”

“I’m aware.”

She gaped at him, at a loss for words, and he tried not to be offended by that. Her shock was fair, if he was being honest. He’d never gone more than a couple of weeks without sex, and he wasn’t exactly known to keep at it with the same woman. “But why…”

He let out a long breath, knowing he had no choice but to tell her the truth. It was his secret, after all. “I slept with you for the first time, Felicity, and...as much as I hate to admit it, and as lame as I feel saying this, you kind of ruined other women for me.”

“What…?”

“Ever since it happened, I don’t just find myself wanting sex...It’s like I can’t stop thinking about having sex with you.”

“You’re serious?”

He gave her a look, “Is that really so hard to believe?”

“Well,” she breathed. “A little bit. I know I never asked, but I just assumed…”

“That I was sleeping with you and still sleeping around?” Oliver shrugged, “It’s not like I did anything to make you think otherwise.”

“Huh…” she leaned back against the couch, processing. “I mean, I’m sure the moment will pass, right? It’s just,” she sighed, shaking her head. “It’s new, and it’s us, and it’s...I don’t know. But I couldn’t have...ruined other women for you. I’m sure it’s just a matter of time until, you know, this thing between us gets old.”

He forced a smile, knowing that he was lying through his teeth as he muttered a halfhearted agreement, “Yeah, I’m sure.”

When their eyes met, though...it seemed to contradict that idea entirely. 

The spark he felt for her was always there, crackling under the surface of his skin. But these days, it was getting harder and harder to ignore. It felt as if every time he looked at Felicity, that spark threatened to explode. And this conversation was only making it worse.

His eyes flickered down to her mouth, his skin warming as she sucked her bottom lip into her mouth. 

He knew what it felt like to suck on that lip. Bite it. He knew what it felt like to pull that lip between his teeth. How her body would react if he did. And that feeling was intoxicating. 

Oliver wanted it. Craved it. Now. Tomorrow. Any day.

The sound of a throat clearing behind them made him gasp, both of them whipping around to look at the door where the voice had come from.

“Hi,” A tall, dark haired man raised his hand awkwardly. “Didn’t mean to interrupt,” he said with a wide, friendly grin. “Lester told me you were here today, Felicity, so I just wanted to stop by and say hello.”

Felicity quickly stood up from the couch, putting distance between her and Oliver as she walked towards the man at the door. “Mr. Palmer!”

Of course.

Before she reached him, her eyes fell to her feet, realizing that she was barefoot. And her cheeks turned red in embarrassment. Felicity laughed nervously, stopping in the middle of the room, gesturing between the two men. “Oliver, this is Mr. Palmer, um, as in the Palmer of Palmer Technologies, obviously.” 

Oliver stood up, crossing the room with his hand outstretched. 

Palmer shook his hand, acknowledging him politely before he turned his attention back to Felicity. “Please, I told you that you can call me Ray.”

“Right,” Felicity breathed, putting on a smile. “And Ray, this is Oliver Queen—”

“As in the Queen of Queen Consolidated,” Ray finished for her.

Felicity turned her smile to Oliver, “And my best friend.”

Ray nodded, glancing between them as he put his hands in his pockets. “It’s nice to meet you, Mr. Queen.” 

Oliver did the same, instinctively standing a little taller. “Nice to meet you too, Mr. Palmer.” Then he looked at Felicity, “Does everyone work here on Saturdays?” He asked teasingly, earning himself an eye-roll from Felicity.

The CEO of Palmer Tech chuckled, too. “Trust me, I’d kick her out of here on the weekends if I didn’t need her so much. I’m glad to see she at least knows how to take a break, though.”

“Oliver makes it impossible not to,” Felicity laughed as she gestured to the table. “He’s an amazing cook.” She picked up a muffin and offered it out to Ray.

“Wow!” He smiled at each of them as he took it. “Thank you. Impressive, Mr. Queen. I count it as a success if I can manage a meal without it turning into a kitchen nightmare.”

Tipping his chin towards Felicity, he raised an eyebrow, “Sounds like this one.”

Felicity waved him off, “Okay, okay.”

Ray’s smile remained in place as his eyes shifted between them, “Well, I should get back to work. Actually, Felicity, while I’m here, I just wanted to check if you planned to attend the gala next week? I know we have some board members who are eager to meet you face-to-face.” He let out a nervous-sounding laugh, “Not that you should feel pressured by that. It’s no problem if you can’t make it.”

Felicity made a noise, her nose scrunching as she considered it. Oliver knew her well enough to know that she wasn’t really sure what to say. After another moment, she settled for, “Yeah, I think I’ll be able to make it. Sounds like it’ll be a fun night.”

“Great!” Ray beamed, clearly ecstatic by that news.

Great.

“Well,” he continued to grin, “I should get back to work. I’ll look forward to seeing you there. If I don’t see you before then, of course.” 

Oliver narrowed his eyes at the nervous way he spoke. The guy was the CEO of a major company. It was unlikely that he was easily flustered. Which made Oliver think that it was Felicity that had Ray Palmer acting all fidgety. Still, Oliver stood up to shake his hand, and Ray finally took his eyes off Felicity. “Again, great to meet you, Mr. Palmer.” 

Lifting the muffin in his hand, Ray gave them a final wave as he backed out of the door. “Thanks again for breakfast.”

“Any time!” Felicity called after him. 

Her cheeks were pink and she still seemed a little flustered after Ray Palmer was gone, which left an uneasy feeling in Oliver’s chest. But Felicity just turned back to her coffee, talking to him about something completely unrelated as if Ray hadn’t interrupted at all.

She didn’t tell him what that was all about, so Oliver didn’t really want to ask.

Chapter Text

“I’ll take a Cobb salad with light dressing.” Oliver glanced down at his nearly-empty glass and shrugged to himself. “And another beer, please.”

The waitress standing over them smiled, retrieving their menus before heading back inside. 

Oliver sighed, leaning back in his chair as he finished the last sip of his first drink. He had to get back to work after this, so one would have been sufficient. But he felt like enjoying himself today.

“It’s beautiful out,” he praised, looking across the bay that was filled with boats. Plenty of people were taking advantage of the rare sunshine in Starling. 

Which is exactly what he’d been hoping to do by having lunch out on the patio at his favorite spot. 

“It is,” Sara replied as she watched the activity too, adjusting the sunglasses on her face. After another moment of silence, his friend did what she does best. 

Pester.

“So…” she said lowly. “How is Felicity these days?”

Oliver kept his face smooth, sliding his eyes across the table cautiously. “Didn’t you just have drinks with her on Friday?”

“I did. And then I dropped her off at your place afterwards because she insisted that she needed to see you. So I couldn’t help but wonder...”

He pursed his lips, shaking his head. “We’re not sleeping together.”

“Anymore,” Sara corrected.

Just as he opened his mouth to snark back at her, Oliver noticed that their waitress was coming over with his beer, so he kept his mouth shut and settled for narrowing his eyes at his friend instead. “Thank you,” he said as the waitress turned to leave. Then he focused on Sara again, leaning towards the table. “Felicity and I already connect on a friendship level. I know that we have no trouble connecting on a physical level. What’s the problem with exploring whether or not we can connect on a level that’s deeper than all of that? What’s so wrong about wanting to know if there’s something...romantic between us?”

Sara cocked her head to the side, “I never said there was anything wrong with exploring that possibility, Oliver. I just want to know what you’re thinking.”

“Oh,” he frowned, feeling a little guilty about getting defensive. “Well...okay then.” Reaching for his beer, Oliver looked away, feeling Sara’s eyes on him when he took a sip.

“Of course,” she continued as he put his glass back on the table. “If I didn’t already know that you’re an idiot, I might think that everything you just said is bullshit. But you really do believe all that crap, don’t you?”

He paused, blinking as her words sunk in. The defensive guard went right back up. “Excuse me?”

“You really think that you’re just considering whether or not you and Felicity can be more than friends and more than fuck buddies, don’t you?”

Well...not when she put it like that. That made him sound like a tool.

“You know I’ve never had a solid girlfriend, Sara. Going on dates, having a relationship, being committed to one person. I’m just...seeing what all the fuss is about. And Felicity was willing to do the same. What else would we be doing?” he grumbled back. Because it was the only explanation he had.

“Procrastinating,” Sara shrugged. “Running scared. Hiding from the inevitable.” Apparently she had more reasons for his behavior than he’d been able to come up with.

Oliver was almost afraid to ask… “What’s the inevitable?”

“You and Felicity are going to end up together,” Sara grinned, confidence in her voice.

Maybe, in the back of his mind, when he wasn’t actively avoiding thoughts of that very same idea, he had allowed himself to wonder. But hearing Sara say the words out loud made Oliver feel sick. Kind of like how monogamy and commitment used to make him feel sick. This time though, he was pretty sure the reaction came from fear , just as Sara had pointed out. 

The thing was, he wasn’t afraid of monogamy with Felicity. Or commitment. He’d lost all desire for other women as soon as he’d slept with her for the first time and realized that sex could be so much more ...when he cared about the person he was sleeping with the way he cared for Felicity. And he’d been a committed, loyal friend to her for years now. He already couldn’t imagine his life without her. And that was where the fear crept in. Deep down, Oliver knew he was mostly afraid to get his hopes up. He was afraid that Sara was wrong; that he and Felicity wouldn’t be able to make it as a real couple, and he’d lose her as the result.

So he lied. To his friends. To Felicity. And most of all, to himself.

Settling down and becoming someone’s husband used to be terrifying to think about. Then he met Felicity, and somewhere along the way, those possibilities for his life felt different when he thought about having them with Felicity. 

Felicity changed everything...and a part of him had always known that she was doing it, but he pretended that it wasn’t happening. She made him think about things he never bothered to consider with other girls. She made him want things he told himself he would never want. But he ignored it because he was too afraid he’d fuck things up if he tried to have them. 

His voice was timid when he spoke again, “There’s a lot to lose here, Sara. The last thing I want to do is lose her.”

“I think that somewhere inside of that dense skull of yours, there’s a tiny little brain,” Sara smiled cheekily, and he gave her a sharp look. “And in that tiny little brain, you know that Felicity is the woman for you. And you know that now is the right time for you two. And you also know that what you’re doing right now is way more dangerous to your friendship with Felicity than if you just admitted that you want more. You're playing games, Oliver, whether you see it that way or not. And no one is going to win unless you're honest with yourself. Why are you going to all this trouble just to spend time with Felicity?”

Oliver swallowed thickly, “You forgot that a side effect of my tiny little brain is that I tend to fuck things up.”

“No,” Sara huffed. “Most of the time, you choose to sabotage yourself, Oliver. I watched you do some pretty fucked up things to girls, you know. Cheating on them. Leading them on. Lying to them. Never calling them back after you slept with them. I mean, you were terrible. Sometimes I wished I wasn’t even friends with you because it was so hard to watch.”

“This is a great pep talk,” he grumbled.

Sara held up her finger, telling him she wasn’t finished. “But I know for a fact that no matter what mistakes you make, you would never treat Felicity like that. Do you really think that if I thought you were going to break Felicity’s heart, I’d be telling you to go for it?” 

“I guess not…”

“Listen,” Sara sighed, offering him a sympathetic look. “I can’t tell you that it’s going to be smooth sailing from here on out, but I can tell you that it’s going to be worth it.”

“How can I even...I mean, how can I trust that I won’t become that person again, or...you know, fall back into old habits? Lying, or cheating, or...not being good enough for someone like her.”

Sara stared at him incredulously, “Are you kidding? You grew out of that shit years ago, Oliver. As your friend, who watched it happen first-hand, I can confidently say that Felicity has been changing you for the better since you met. No matter what happens between you and her, you’re not that person anymore.”

He remembered what Felicity had said the other morning about the first time she met Sara. How Sara had told her that he was probably going to ask her out. “Why didn’t you ever talk to me about this? About her?” He asked, carefully eyeing his friend. “If you knew that I had feelings for her before I even realized it…”

Sara scoffed. “Honestly, because up until now, I wasn’t sure how you’d react. Even a year ago, you might’ve called me crazy for suggesting that you two should date. And you probably would’ve pushed Felicity away. I’m telling you now because this ‘platonic dating’ thing you’ve come up with tells me everything I need to know. The time is right for you and Felicity...and you know that. Your tiny little brain just has a very strange way of showing it.”

He chuckled, leaning back against his chair. 

“Plus,” Sara arched an eyebrow from beneath her sunglasses. “Our waitress has been trying to catch your eye since we got here and you haven’t hit on her once. In fact, I’m not even sure you noticed…”

Oliver let out a breath, his cheeks flushing. He had not. And she was right, that was unlike him. 

Before Felicity started to consume every moment of his life, he would have noticed if a pretty waitress was trying to catch his eye. And he probably would have walked out of the restaurant with that waitress’s phone number. But he’d meant what he said to Felicity the other day in her office. She had ruined other women for him. Not just the ones he invited into his bed. Not just the ones he drunkenly hooked up with. Every woman who looked his way was completely pale in comparison to the way Felicity Smoak made him feel.

Sara gave him a knowing smirk, “Clearly, you have it bad for our girl.” There wasn’t even a chance of arguing about it anymore, so Oliver just offered a noncommittal shrug in response. “Wow,” Sara raised her eyebrows, impressed. “Are we past the denial stage, finally?”

“Yeah,” Oliver said softly. “I think I’ve already gotten myself into the ‘trying to make my best friend fall in love with me’ stage. So, are you going to help me, or what?”

A mischievous smile spread across Sara’s face, “Obviously.”

By the time they were finished eating, and scheming, Oliver had taken a much longer lunch break than he usually liked to. But Sara had helped him to come up with a pretty solid plan. 

A date.

And since he didn’t have time to call Felicity and properly ask her out, he decided to put it in an email, hoping it had the same charming and formal effect. He drafted the email instead of paying attention during his afternoon meeting, and then sent it to Felicity. As the meeting was wrapping up, his phone buzzed in his pocket with a text from her.

He tried not to smile as he looked down at his phone in his lap.

Felicity: What the frack is this?

Oliver: I thought it was pretty self explanatory. Did I miss anything?

Felicity: Are you asking me on a date, or telling me that we’re going on one?

Holding in a sigh, Oliver quickly typed out a response: I’m suggesting , Felicity.

Felicity: Well maybe you should ask. What if I want to say no?

Oliver: You don’t want to say no. It’s on the list.

Felicity: We talked about it, but technically we never actually added ‘going on a date’ to our fake dating list. But fine. You’re right. I can’t say no to free food.

He couldn’t contain his smile now.

Oliver: I’ll pick you up at 7:00.

7 o’clock couldn’t come soon enough. He spent the rest of the afternoon trying to make himself busy, but he was too worked up about the date and the things he’d discussed with Sara to focus on work.

Just as the sun was beginning to set outside the windows of his office, Oliver shut everything down and rushed out of the building. He wanted to give himself just enough time to get ready and get to Felicity’s, making sure he wasn’t tempted to show up early because he knew how much she hated that.

When he knocked on her door, it was 7:00 on the dot. 

Of course, he hadn’t taken into account the fact that Felicity was notorious for running late. So she opened the door barefoot, fidgeting with an earring as she swung the door open and smiled at him.

His heart did a tiny flip at the sight of her. 

Her glasses were off, her hair down and flowing in soft, messy waves, her makeup was subtle and beautiful. 

And she was wearing a sultry red dress.

She turned around and hurried back into her apartment, giving him a nice view of the way the dress hugged her ass. His eyes darted back up to her face as Felicity looked over her shoulder at him, waving her hand to invite him in. “I’m almost ready!” she called. “Grab a beer. Sit. Five more minutes. I promise!”

Oliver didn’t bother with a beer, but he followed her inside. Taking a seat on the couch, he placed the bouquet of wildflowers he brought her onto the table in front of him and listened while Felicity ran off to her room, apparently in search of shoes. 

“Oh you stupid little…” he heard her grumbling to herself from down the hall. “Come on!”

“Felicity?” He called out, “do you need any help?”

“No,” she called back, sounding a little exasperated. “Be right out!”

Oliver sucked in a calming, but shaky, breath and ran his hands down the front of his pants.

His palms were sweating.

Why were his palms sweating?

It was Felicity. The same Felicity who had been his friend for years.

But what if she thought this whole idea was stupid? What if she laughed at him? What if she hated it?

“Okay,” Felicity’s voice carried through the apartment as she came into the room.

Standing up, he picked up the flowers again and turned to look at her. 

She’d smoothed her hair down, put on lipstick that perfectly matched her red dress, and now had on a pair of high heels that made her taller than a few minutes ago. She looked a little bit different, but she was just as gorgeous as before. 

He hadn’t seen her dressed up like this since Nyssa and Sara’s wedding. And it made him feel...some type of way…to know that she’d done this for a date with him.

Oliver felt all of his nerves melting away as he drank her in.

It was Felicity.

“You look incredible,” he complimented, earning himself a bright smile.

Her eyes flickered over him, from his hair, down the length of his body, to his feet. She looked like she liked what she saw, and that had his own eyes raking over her with the exact same approval.

“You’re not so bad yourself,” Felicity whispered. She pointed to his hand, reminding him that he was holding the wildflowers. “And you brought me those?”

“Oh, yes,” Oliver huffed out a breath, stepping closer and handing the bouquet over to her. They were vibrant and colorful and charming, exactly what he described to the florist for the arrangement, because it was exactly how he viewed Felicity. “I got them from the flower shop you made me go into last month,” he explained.

Felicity leaned in to smell them, her eyes roaming up to his face. “You mean the one by the farmer’s market that I also made you go to?”

Oliver nodded, smiling as he remembered that morning. 

She’d called him late the night before and invited him over. He’d teased her, asking if she was using him as a booty call. And Felicity had very bluntly told him that yes, she was. 

Their sex that night proved the same conviction. Hot and quick, like they’d had an itch that needed to be scratched. 

Once it was over, Oliver stayed the night (no cuddling), and in the morning, she insisted that he go with her to the farmer’s market.

When they’d passed the flower shop on the walk back to his car, Felicity had pulled him inside to look around. She’d ended up bringing home some lilies that she bought for herself, beaming as she told him that they would look great on her kitchen table. It was something that reminded him how easy it was to please her. He adored the way that little things, like flowers on her kitchen table, seemed to bring her so much joy.

In hindsight, he probably should have listened to the pang in his heart that day. Or any day before it when Felicity, just by being herself, had made him feel warm. In awe of her. He should have recognized that it meant he was falling for her.

“Let me just put these in some water and then we can go,” Felicity said. She moved into the kitchen to retrieve a vase. Then she displayed the flowers on the table where the lilies had once been, before she’d eventually had to throw them out. But the new flowers brightened her space just as well.

When he went to hand Felicity her coat and she smiled at him, he felt that pang in his heart again. 

This time, he listened to it.

He was absolutely, without a doubt, falling in love with his best friend.

A few minutes later, they were in his car, heading to a restaurant that Oliver had chosen. Felicity spoke up as he drove them downtown, “Your email was pretty vague, aside from telling me that it’s going to be the best date ever.” Oliver pinched his lips together, suddenly wishing he’d never said that. Sara had helped him come up with a great plan. He’d been feeling excited, and apparently confident, when he sent that email to Felicity. Now, he was just anxious.

“Are you going to tell me where we’re going?” Felicity asked.

He shook his head, keeping his eyes focused on the road and his hands on the wheel. “I think I’ll keep it a surprise.”

Once they were closer to the restaurant, Felicity seemed to realize where they were heading. She perked up in her seat, a smile spreading across her face as she looked out the window. “Are we going…” He tossed her a glance, grinning when he saw the expression on her face. “Ohhhh, yay,” Felicity laughed, doing a little dance in her seat. “I love that place! It’s been forever!”

They were both still smiling as he parked in front of the French bistro, quickly getting out and coming around to open her door. Felicity scrunched her nose at him, taking his hand and letting him help her out of the car. “I didn’t know that our date was also going to include Oliver Queen being the perfect gentleman.”

Placing his hand low on her back, they walked up the sidewalk. “Of course it will,” Oliver mumbled in her ear. “I’m hoping to get that ‘goodnight kiss’ tonight.”

Felicity sucked in a breath, her eyes darting up to his face. “Is that what this is all about?” She chuckled.

“Not all about that,” he smirked. “But you did say that a date needs to be included. We can go on as many as you want, but if you do want me to kiss you tonight, all you have to do is say so.” He opened the door, winking as she walked inside the restaurant ahead of him.

The hostess was friendly as she showed them to their table; a nice spot in front of the windows, open to a view of the gardens in a park across the street. Felicity waited until after the hostess walked away before she responded, “Oliver…”

Something in her voice caught his attention, and he quickly looked from the window to her face. She stared back at him for another moment, her eyes flickering between his as if she was searching for something. 

“I want you to kiss me.”

Oliver’s breath caught in his throat. Did she mean later, like they’d talked about...a goodnight kiss once the night was over? Or...did she mean right now?

As Oliver watched her, Felicity bit her lip. Her eyes dropped to his mouth.

Oh...now was good.

He couldn’t help but smile as he started to lean across the table.

Felicity let him get halfway there before she pulled the menu up in front of her face, making him freeze. Her eyes were shining with amusement as she looked back at him, more than entertained. “Just testing you,” she giggled.

Oliver huffed, settling back into his chair with a frown. “That was mean.”

She shrugged, still amused by her little trick. “You keep being ‘perfect gentleman Oliver,’ and you’ll get your kiss at the end of the night,” Felicity teased. “I promise.”

That only made his frown deepen. “I’m always ‘perfect gentleman Oliver.’”

“Mmm,” Felicity hummed. “You make a very good point.”

Their waitress came over just then, forcing them to look away from each other. They ordered their drinks and then quickly looked over the menu. Felicity had a particularly hard time choosing between the pan seared salmon and the chicken chasseur, until Oliver said he planned on getting the salmon and promised that he would share so she could have a taste of each.

As soon as the waitress walked away, they were right back to their little eye-contact game, neither of them saying much at all. At least not out loud. But the tension in the air was thick. Sexual. And impossible to ignore. 

And he was so done with ignoring it.

Sometimes when Felicity’s eyes would meet his, the connection they had took on a life of its own. A palpable thing. He was done pretending that that never happened. Or that it was strictly physical. He was done shying away whenever their chemistry felt too intense. Done hiding his eyes before Felicity could look too deeply.

“Oliver…” she whispered his name again.

If they weren’t in the middle of that bistro, he was pretty sure that he would be all over her.

But no.

Tonight was about being ‘perfect gentleman Oliver.’ Tonight was about making Felicity see that he could handle romance like the best of them. And it certainly wouldn’t be gentlemanly or romantic to rush this thing along as fast as possible so that he could get his hands on her.

Even if he really, really wanted to.

“Excuse me,” an older woman from a nearby table waved for their attention. Oliver glanced at her skeptically while Felicity turned towards her with a friendly smile. “I’m sorry to bother you, I just wanted to say that you look like a wonderful couple. Young love is so precious, and you two seem so sweet together.”

He wasn’t sure what the lady saw that seemed sweet , since his current thoughts about Felicity were anything but.

“Thank you. That’s very kind,” Felicity answered with a polite nod, her cheeks blushing. The woman smiled at them both before turning back to her table. 

As soon as her head was turned away from them, Felicity raised an eyebrow, leaning closer to hiss at him, “Did you pay her to say that!?”

Oliver laughed, “Swear to god, I didn’t. But that wouldn’t have been a bad idea.”

After they ordered their food and had their drinks in front of them, Felicity clapped her hands. “I’m so excited to be back here,” she said as she squirmed in her seat. “God, I don’t think I’ve even been in here since—”

“Your first night in Starling,” he quietly finished her sentence. “Me either.” Her eyes softened as she looked back at him, and Oliver reached over to squeeze her hand. “We’ve come a long way…”

“In a good way, right?” Felicity asked, turning her hand over to lace her fingers through his. Her gaze dropped to their intertwined hands, resting comfortably on the table. She smiled slightly as she rubbed her thumb across his palm.

“Yeah,” Oliver mumbled back, a little mesmerized by the way she was touching him. “In a really good way, I’d say.”

She nodded in agreement, “We’ve definitely become...closer than I think we’ve ever been.”

He liked the sound of that.

But he knew that he wanted to be even closer. He didn’t want a single boundary left between them. He wanted to take this fake relationship and turn it into a real relationship. “Yes, we have…” Oliver whispered back, wondering what Felicity would say if he told her that he wanted more. 

While he was trying to find the words, Felicity’s mind was somewhere else. Before he could figure out the right way to explain how he felt, she spoke. “I’d say we’re even, um, the kind of friends who can ask each other for favors.”

Oliver paused, thrown off guard by the hesitant tone in her voice, the shy look on her face, and the nervous way she was playing with his fingers. He nodded carefully, curious about what he was getting himself into as he answered, “Of course. You can ask me for anything, Felicity. I’m always here for you.”

She relaxed a little bit at that, her eyes shifting up to meet his again. “I know you are. And I hope you know that I wouldn’t be asking if I had any other choice.”

“Felicity,” he frowned, giving her a look across the table. “Are you saying that I’m your last choice?” 

The idea of her coming to him because she simply had no one else didn’t sit right with him. If she needed something, anything, he hoped that he would be the first person she called. She was that person for him, at least.

Her eyes widened. “No, that’s not what I meant!” Felicity shook her head. “It’s just...I need a date.”

“A date?”

Felicity groaned, “Yes. For this work thing that I have to go to next weekend. That gala that Ray asked me about while you were in my office the other day? I was just thinking about how much I hate those things. I’m dreading it, to be honest...and I could use a friendly face by my side.”

Oh. That.

He watched her for a moment, pretending that he had to think about it. Although the answer was obviously a resounding yes. “All your other date options said no?” he teased.

She gave him a playful glare, “Of course you’re my first choice. I just meant that I have no way of getting out of going since I told our CEO that I’d be there. So I thought I would be polite and ask my boyfriend first. But hey, if you’re not interested, I can explore other options.”

“No,” Oliver quickly shook his head. “No need. Count me in, I’ll go, I’m your man.”

Felicity smirked back at him, a glint in her eyes that made him think, just for a moment, that maybe she liked the sound of that as much as he liked saying it.

It didn’t take much longer after their food came, and after they had a couple more drinks in them, for Oliver and Felicity to loosen up a little bit more. He let her pick at his plate as much as she wanted, and he didn’t have a single complaint when she started holding her fork out to feed him bites from hers. Felicity’s laughter was melodic and contagious as they swapped stories, many of which they’d shared before or even been a part of. But everything that night felt as if they had put it under a new light. Something fresh and invigorating was brewing between them. Profoundly, their dynamic was shifting yet again. And all Oliver could do was pray that it was for the better.

Once they left the bistro, Oliver suggested a walk in the park, wanting to make the night last as long as he possibly could. And then when they finally reached his car again, Felicity procrastinated the end of their date even longer by asking if he wanted to stop for ice cream.

It wasn’t that he was afraid to kiss Felicity. That’s not why he desperately wished that he didn’t have to take her home. It was more about the fact that he wanted to keep his promise. And that meant saying ‘goodnight’ afterwards.

After such a perfect evening, he didn’t want to say goodnight. He didn’t want to leave her, go back to his own place, and then spend the rest of the night thinking about her. He didn’t want to sleep alone. Sleeping with Felicity was so much better.

But then again...wasn’t that his whole fascination with the concept of a goodnight kiss? Having to part ways afterwards? Having to show restraint? Having to feel that sense of longing? Of wanting more, but keeping his desire at bay?

As humiliated as he was to admit it; that wasn’t something that Oliver ever really had to deal with. He’d never cared to exercise that kind of modesty when it came to women, and they usually didn’t deny him, either. But even in the rare occasions that he struck out, it was never any skin off his back. If he’d been determined not to go home alone, then he never did. It didn’t matter who he ended up going home with, as long as he was attracted to her and she was willing to sleep with him.

With Felicity, Oliver knew that it would be extremely hard to leave it at just a kiss. Hence the reason he couldn’t stop having sex with her once they’d started. It was borderline addicting to fuck her. Even after it happened for the first time and things had been awkward for a while, even when he’d been terrified that it was going to destroy their friendship, they found themselves in bed together again and again. 

No matter how many times he’d told himself in the last three months that he would end it before it became a risk to their friendship, he couldn’t stop.

It felt too good. She was too... Felicity.

“You’ve gotten awfully quiet,” her voice pulled him from his thoughts. 

Oliver took his eyes off the road to look at her, realizing that she was watching him. “Sorry,” he forced a smile, not wanting to bring down the mood.

Felicity reached across the seat and patted his leg, “Thinking hard about what kind of ice cream you want?”

His smile quickly turned into a more genuine one, his hands relaxing on the wheel. “Yeah, because unlike some people, I don’t get the same thing every time.”

“Hey!” Her mouth fell open in feigned shock, “Mint chip is delicious! And it’s a classic!”

Of course, despite his teasing, Felicity ended up ordering exactly what he’d expected. And stuck her tongue out at him as she did. He ordered his own; strawberry ice cream in a cone. Then they ate in the car as slowly as they could without letting their ice cream melt, talking and laughing just like they’d been doing all night, while music played softly from the radio in the background. 

“This was a nice date,” Oliver said as they finished up, his voice hesitant.

“ So nice,” Felicity’s smile was warm, letting him know that she meant it.

He was dreading the end of it. But after another silent look between them, he knew that it was time.

The drive back to her apartment was quick, even with Felicity babbling. He could tell that she was nervous, talking about anything that came to her mind just to avoid any uneasy silence. But he felt like he needed the distraction as much as she did, so he listened with rapt attention as she told him all about the project she was currently working on with Alena and Curtis.

And soon enough, they reached her townhouse.

Felicity quieted as he parked the car. 

Oliver kept his hands on the wheel, wondering how the hell he didn’t come up with a plan for this part. He was too worried about making sure the date went smoothly to think about the logistics of this arranged kiss. Who the hell plans to kiss someone, anyway?

“Well,” she whispered. “I guess this is it.”

“Yeah,” he answered lowly, his hands still gripping the wheel.

“Oliver,” Felicity said around a breathy laugh. “If you’re waiting for my permission...you have it.”

His head snapped up, his eyes flying to her face. She reached down and unbuckled her seatbelt, and then she was sliding closer. 

“Let me walk you up,” he found himself choking the words out, despite the fact that his body was already gravitating towards her, his head tilting to meet her halfway.

Felicity stopped, surprised for a moment. But then she smiled and her eyes flickered to her front porch. “Okay.”

He took a deep breath as they got out, knowing full well that he had no reason to be this strung out about it. He’s kissed Felicity. A lot. He knew that she was a good kisser. And he knew that she seemed to like kissing him back. The only thing different now was that he had a better understanding of his feelings for her.

All night, he seemed incapable of telling her how he really felt. Of putting himself out there. Something told him that as lovely as the date had been, maybe it wasn’t the right time to lay all of that baggage out in front of her. Maybe it was better to enjoy this month as Felicity’s ‘boyfriend’ while it lasted, and let things take their course when the time came. Or maybe he was just a coward who was too afraid to take the opportunity he was given.

Either way...at the moment, the opportunity that Oliver did have...was to kiss her.

She stopped as they reached her front door. Her keys were in her hand, but she didn’t unlock it. Instead, she turned to him, her cheeks flushed and her smile shy. “Well, thank you for tonight. It—” Felicity chuckled, shaking her head in amusement. “It was probably the best date I’ve ever been on, honestly. So...thank you.”

If the sincerity wasn't so clear in her voice, Oliver might not have believed it.

He stared at her for a moment longer, their eyes doing that thing, as if he could feel the electricity bouncing from hers to his own. Sparks flying between them. Then he stepped closer, unable to tolerate the distance any longer.

As Oliver gently cupped her face between his hands, as her lips finally touched his, he took all of the emotions he’d been bottling up and poured them into that kiss. 

He let himself feel all of it, his mouth slanting to hers. 

He hoped that Felicity would sense it, too. He hoped that she would understand how he felt when he kissed her like this. And he hoped that she felt all of those same things for him; the pull they had towards one another, the way that their lives had always seemed to be heading to this . 

You and Felicity are going to end up together.

A soft moan fell from Felicity’s lips, and he answered it with one of his own. Her hands gripped at his shoulders, then his shirt, pulling him closer. 

Oliver quickly spun them around, finding the front door and pressing her back up against it. Instinctively, his hands moved from her face, down to her hips, until he eventually slipped them around to her backside. All night he'd been envious of the sexy red dress she was wearing. Wanting to feel the silky fabric and the perfect curve of her ass beneath it. And as he finally did, Felicity rolled her hips in encouragement, starting to suck on his bottom lip.

God...it felt incredible.

Just as his skin was beginning to get hotter, Oliver found whatever willpower he had left and leaned back. He pressed his forehead against hers, catching his breath, his hands still anchored on her ass. And Felicity did the same, her fingers still gripping the collar of his shirt.

In that moment, he knew that he could kiss her again, and she would kiss him back. She might even ask him to come inside. Or pull him through the threshold by his tie, looking up at him with those dark blue bedroom eyes that he loved to see.

Oliver swallowed thickly, wrestling with himself to resist the urge he’d been unable to deny for the last three months: stopping before they got carried away. “I’ll call you tomorrow.” 

Felicity's breath was ragged too, “Okay.”

Keeping his eyes closed, he whispered, “Goodnight, Felicity.”

She didn’t move as she mumbled back, “Goodnight.” 

Felicity nodded slightly, as if to tell him that it was okay. Okay to stop, or okay to keep kissing her, he wasn’t actually sure. But neither of them moved for another few seconds. 

Finally, Oliver forced himself to take his hands off of her. Well, off of her butt at least. He moved them up to her hips. Safer territory.

She whimpered as he did, pulling her head away from his. He opened his eyes and found her looking up at him, her pupils wide. 

The tension between them was undeniable, building thicker and thicker since they first saw each other tonight. 

But when she let out a breathless laugh, he returned it easily. 

A knowing look passed between them. As if they were both taking a moment to silently acknowledge that she could unlock that door, he could go inside, and they could end their perfectly nice date with some perfectly hot sex.

Instead, Oliver lifted her chin between his fingers, reconciling the tension with one more kiss.

It might not have been the innocent kiss at the end of a date that he imagined when he put it on their list...but they took their damn time saying goodnight. And that felt just as right.

Chapter Text

He’d been looking at himself in the mirror for ten minutes already, trying to pick a tie to wear to the gala. Of course, the real debate stemmed from not being able to decide which one Felicity would like best. Already in his tux, he just wasn’t sure if he should go with a classic black tie, or a bow tie.

Glancing over his shoulder, Oliver raised his eyebrow at Bigfoot, who was lounging on the bed, completely unaffected. “What do you think?” He sighed anyway. The cat blinked back at him, just as unamused and unbothered as ever, and Oliver rolled his eyes. “No help. Typical.”

When he heard a knock at the door, Oliver paused, confused since he wasn’t expecting anyone. He placed the ties on his dresser before leaving his bedroom, jogging down the stairs. 

And as soon as he got to the door and opened it, he regretted it.

Tommy Merlyn breezed into the penthouse without waiting for an invitation. Oliver swung the door shut, quickly following him. “Buddy, now isn’t really a good time. I’m going to be leaving soon.”

“I figured,” his friend scoffed. “I’ve barely seen you in two weeks, considering you’ve been spending all of your time with one Felicity Smoak lately.” He fell onto the couch, looking back at Oliver with a knowing smirk. Oliver clenched his jaw, shoving both of his hands into his pockets because he really wasn’t in the mood for teasing. He already felt silly enough, struggling to decide what tie he would wear on his second date with one Felicity Smoak. “Oh relax,” Tommy laughed. “I won’t stay long. I have a date with the twins tonight, anyway.”

Oliver shook his head. He assumed that Tommy meant Bridget and Regina, who luckily weren’t actual twins. But they did look a lot alike. Especially if you were drunk enough, it was hard to tell the difference between them. It didn’t help that they did everything together. Including Tommy. 

“You call that dating?”

Tommy winked, but gave nothing more than a shrug in response. “So, what’s going on with you and Felicity?”

“Nothing,” Oliver breathed.

His friend snorted in disapproval. “Sure, that’s why you’re dressed like you’re going to one of those QC banquets that you hate so much.”

“It’s a gala. And it’s for Palmer Tech.”

Tommy raised his eyebrows, waving his hand around in Oliver’s general direction. “So it’s for Felicity. I rest my case!”

He pointed a finger at Tommy, already walking away as he shook his head and told him, “We’re not talking about this.”

Of course, Tommy wasn’t quite so easy to shake off. Like a dog with a bone, he followed Oliver upstairs. “Oh, but we are!” Tommy insisted, still on Oliver’s heels as he walked back into his bedroom. “Come on. I know you’ve always had that weird flirtation thing—”

“There’s no...weird flirtation thing,” Oliver huffed, exhausted with the conversation already. 

“Of course there is!” Tommy insisted. “I thought fucking each other would get it out of your systems but damn,” his eyes grew wide. “It only made it worse, huh?”

He loved Tommy like a brother. And treated him like one, too. So Oliver knew that Tommy wouldn’t understand where he was coming from. Tommy wouldn’t be able to grasp the idea of wanting one woman and one woman only. In all honesty, it took Oliver quite a while to get there himself.

Resorting to childish methods, Tommy put his hands on his hips and pouted. “I know you’ve been talking to Sara about this thing with Felicity! Come on, man! I’m supposed to be your best friend.”

Oliver was still figuring it out himself, and he’d only confided in Sara because deep down, he knew that she would tell him what he wanted to hear. Tommy, on the other hand…

“Look,” his best friend sighed. “I get that you have feelings for her. Maybe even real ones. Anyone with eyes can see that you’ve always been a bit...smitten with the lovely Miss Smoak.”

“Tommy…” Oliver warned, knowing in his gut that whatever his friend had to say about this, he didn’t want to know.

Shaking his head, Tommy continued. “But I know you, okay? And you know you. If she was the woman to change you, don’t you think it would have happened by now?”

“What?” Oliver mumbled, taken aback by Tommy’s approach. He dropped in, uninvited, just to tell him that he hadn’t changed and shouldn’t get involved with Felicity?

“I’m just being straight with you, Oliver. I don’t want to see either of you get hurt. You’ve known each other for years. Don’t you think that you would have pulled your head out of your ass and done something about it sooner if Felicity was the one?”

“What the hell are you trying to do right now?” Oliver asked, narrowing his eyes.

“I’m...I’m just making sure you’ve thought this through. I know how close you and Felicity are. But guys like us...we don’t get girls like her. And it’d be a hell of a lot better on your heart if you came to that realization sooner rather than later.”

“Tommy, I’m not going to get into this with you,” Oliver practically growled. “Just mind your own damn business, alright?” 

Part of his defensiveness was because Tommy was being an ass. But another part of it was because Tommy was laying out everything Oliver wanted to ignore. He didn’t want to be afraid anymore. He’d much rather believe what Sara had said; that it was all about timing. Maybe it was finally the right time for them to try. Maybe everything was changing between them because he and Felicity were ready for it to change.

Oliver had thought that his eyes were open to the possibility of him and Felicity being a real couple now.

But what if Tommy was right?

“Just...think about it, Oliver.”

All he did was think about it. 

All he did was wonder if he deserved Felicity. 

“Fine, you’ve said your piece,” he grumbled back. “Are we done here?”

Tommy smiled and patted him on the shoulder, “I see that you’re a little touchy today.”

Oliver scoffed, “No, I’m just sick of you.”

“Oh, come on, buddy. I’m just trying to look out for you and for Felicity. You know I care and I just–” he stopped when his phone started to ring. Tommy let out a huff of irritation at the interruption but Oliver sighed in relief. “Speak of the devil,” he mumbled as he pulled his phone out and checked it, a wide grin spreading across his face. 

Oliver frowned as Tommy turned away from him. 

“Hello, Miss Smoak. To what do I owe the pleasure of hearing your voice on this fine evening?”

Oliver’s frown deepened as he moved towards Tommy. “It’s Felicity?”

“Why yes,” Tommy held a finger up, angling the phone away. “I am with Oliver right now. He’s getting ready for your date.”

“Why is she calling you?” Oliver asked. 

Tommy and Felicity got along just fine whenever an occasion called for both of them to attend, but they’d never gone out of their way to become friends. Oliver had tried to push them to get closer when Felicity first moved to Starling, wanting her to have as many friends in her corner as he could offer her. Since Tommy was one of his best friends from childhood, Oliver had known that he would be someone Felicity could rely on. Of course, she still could. But Tommy was still Tommy, and he had tried to sleep with her before she’d even finished unpacking her things. 

Felicity had maintained a clear boundary between them after that, making sure that Tommy never got the impression that she was interested again. Not to mention that it led to one of the biggest fights Oliver and Tommy had ever had when he found out. And that prompted Tommy to respect the boundary wholeheartedly ever since. 

Oliver reached over to take the phone from his friend’s hand, but Tommy swerved out of the way, nodding along as he listened to whatever Felicity was saying. 

“What does she need?” Oliver growled, his patience thin.

“Oh, Alena’s date to the fancy gala thingy has food poisoning?” Tommy asked, his grin turning wicked. “And she needs a last minute replacement, you say?”

Oliver instantly jerked his head back and forth, “No!” he called out, more for Felicity to hear than Tommy. “Bad idea! Terrible idea!”

Tommy Merlyn was barely the kind of guy you wanted to bring around children, much less a sophisticated party where all of Felicity and Alena’s bosses would be in attendance.

“I’d be happy to accompany Miss Whitlock,” Tommy ignored Oliver’s pleas. “Let me just call Bridget and Regina and tell them I’ll have to reschedule for another night.”

Oliver closed his eyes, shaking his head as he imagined Felicity’s disgust on the other end of the line.

After he hung up, Tommy informed him that they would be picking the girls up at Felicity’s apartment in an hour. “After I call the twins, I’ll call my driver and have him take us.” Without waiting for Oliver to respond, he bent down and picked up the bow tie that Oliver had been thinking about wearing, “Oh, and I’ll need to borrow a tux since I definitely won’t have time to go home and change.”

He was annoyed with Tommy from the moment he walked into his apartment, and that annoyance didn’t let up as Tommy helped himself to one of the tuxes in his closet. Or when he insisted that they needed to stop for condoms on the way to Felicity’s apartment, ‘just in case’ tonight ended up being the night that Alena finally agreed to have sex with him. In fact, Oliver’s irritation with Tommy reached a whole new level when they pulled up in front of Felicity’s and he insisted on going to the door with Oliver.

Tommy was quick to compliment Alena, telling her that she looked sensational in her dress. And then when Felicity came outside, he let out a whistle and said, “And you as well, Miss Smoak, look fantastic.”

As they walked to the car, Felicity nudged her shoulder against Oliver’s. “You know he’s just trying to get you riled up, right?” She whispered. “It’s what Tommy does best.”

“Well it’s working,” he grumbled back.

Rolling her eyes, Felicity replied, “Forget about him.”

Oliver sighed, looking down at Felicity as they reached the sidewalk. Tommy and Alena were already on the other side, getting into the limo. He put a hand on her shoulder, keeping his voice low and his eyes on her as he bent down to open the door for her. “You do look gorgeous, Felicity.”

And she really did. Half of her hair was pulled back, long blonde waves falling down her back. Her dress was a floor length, pink number that complimented her skin perfectly. He wasn’t sure he’d ever get over the red dress he saw her in on their date last week, but this was a close second.

“That’s more like it,” Felicity shot him a playful wink before slipping into the car.

The gala was being held at the Starling City Botanical Gardens and Oliver couldn’t help but be impressed when Felicity told him that Ray Palmer came up with the idea himself. They were raising money for an outreach program that Oliver was quite familiar with since Queen Consolidated had worked with them before to open food banks throughout the city. 

Now, Palmer Tech was going to help them create sustainable greenhouses that would be maintained by the company and utilized by the community. Which Oliver also couldn’t help but be impressed by.

When they pulled up to the Gardens a few minutes later, all four of them stared up at the venue with awe. The whole place was covered in twinkling lights, creating a gorgeous scene with the greenery and flowers in the gardens. The trails were all lit, a dance floor was set up in the clearing, and all of the guests were dressed for the occasion. 

“Holy frack,” Felicity mumbled as they left the valet and began walking up the stone steps to the gardens. 

As soon as they approached the party, Alena whirled around, yanking on Tommy’s arm to get his attention. “Alright, here’s the deal,” she said sternly. “I’m going to go get us drinks and you’re going to stand here quietly until I get back.”

Tommy shook his head, undeterred and still smiling, “That doesn’t sound very fun.”

Alena cocked her head to the side, “What gave you the impression that this would be fun?”

Turning on his charm, Tommy took a step closer to her. “Well, will I at least be able to dance with you?”

He got a sharp look from Alena in response, “Not a chance.”

Finally, Tommy seemed discouraged. “Well then why’d you bother bringing me as your date!?”

“It was Felicity’s idea,” Alena hissed back.

“And not one of her best ones,” Oliver chimed in. But he snapped his mouth shut when Felicity threw him a glare.

Alena nodded in agreement, though. “Exactly. Which is why you’ll keep your distance unless I need you as arm candy or something.”

Instantly, Tommy was smiling again. 

The kid bounced back fast.

“You think I’m arm candy?”

Alena groaned, shaking her head as she walked away from them, heading straight towards the bar. 

“Well then,” Tommy clapped his hands together. “Miss Smoak, since you seem to be the only one who wants to have a good time here tonight, would you care to dance?”

Oliver stiffened. If Tommy was pushing his buttons because he wanted to get punched in the face, then he was about to get exactly that. But it was Felicity’s response that had him baffled. 

“I would love to,” she smiled politely at Tommy, continuing up to the party. 

Then as Tommy went to follow her and Oliver stood dumbfounded, Felicity started to laugh. She reached around Tommy and grabbed Oliver’s hand, pulling him along with her instead. “With my date.”

She wrapped her hands around his arm, walking by his side until they reached the dance floor. “You owe me a dance anyway.”

Relaxing, Oliver looked down at her. “Do I?”

“It’s on the list,” Felicity sang, gesturing to the other guests; paired off and swaying to the music. “One slow dance, Mr. Queen.”

He hummed as if he was considering it. And she frowned as if she thought that he might say no. But then Oliver wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close, turning her onto the dance floor with ease.

Felicity beamed up at him while he started to lead, one of her hands latching onto his shoulder, and they began to coast through the crowd. He gently guided her other hand to rest over his heart, covering it with his own. They fell in step with the music and with each other. And Felicity’s laugh of delight was everything that he needed to hear. 

It quickly melted every frustration away, making him forget all about Tommy’s lecture as he focused on Felicity, her laughter, and this dance. 

“I was expecting you to say that you don’t dance,” Felicity breathed, clearly surprised at him. “I think Nyssa and Sara’s wedding was the first and only time I’ve seen it happen. And even then, it was only because that adorable flower girl demanded it.”

Oliver wouldn’t call his dancing impressive by any means, but he knew the basics. “I usually don’t like to dance, but I’ve never said that I couldn’t.” He spun Felicity around in a slow circle before carefully leaning forward, keeping her balanced. Felicity followed the movement, giggling again as he dipped her low.

Felicity let her head tip back, and then he pulled her upright again. Oliver met her eyes and smiled, seeing so much pleasure in her expression that he wanted to dip her again. 

Instead, he took her into his arms, pressing his cheek against hers and turned in a slow circle. His hand slid lower down her back, “Dancing with you isn’t so bad,” he whispered in her ear. 

“That’s what you said about cuddling.” Her voice was teasing, but he felt it when she shivered.

Oliver hummed, his eyes glancing around the crowd as he continued to speak only to her. “I’m actually starting to see that none of it is bad. Everything on our list has been...quite enjoyable so far. When I’m doing these things with you, at least.”

She lifted her shoulders, rolling her eyes as if it was no big deal. “Can’t say I have any complaints, either.”

“I’ve been a faithful, monogamous, attentive boyfriend for over two weeks,” Oliver grinned. “Who knew that was even possible?”

Felicity sucked in a breath, pressing her face into his neck for a moment too short, then she pulled back to look at him. And he was surprised by the earnest look on her face, a sad smile that ghosted across her lips but never reached her eyes. “I know you’ll make someone really happy someday, Oliver,” she said quietly. “And that won’t be so bad, either.”

Oliver opened his mouth to respond.

Of course it wouldn’t be bad. All he was trying to say in the first place was that none of it could be that bad. Not if she is the one who he can make happy.

But Oliver snapped his lips shut as he realized that he couldn’t even begin to cover how he felt.

He didn’t know how to explain it. The way that he felt about her, now that he was allowing himself to feel it. The things he wanted with her, now that he was allowing himself to want them. It was so much more than not that bad.  

‘Dating’ Felicity was new, and different, and exciting. And at the same time, it was comfortable and familiar. 

She was everything to him. She had always been everything to him. 

But how could he make her understand that? How could he convince her that his feelings are real, not a product of the recent developments in their relationship?

In his head and in his heart, he knew that it was deeper than friendship. More than sex. He wanted something better than the ‘experiment’ he’d originally propositioned Felicity with. He wanted something that didn’t expire when the month was up. He wanted it to be real.

Now just tell her that, you idiot.

But the longer he went without talking, the more Felicity deflated. After a few moments, she ducked her head, hiding her eyes as she glanced down at her feet. “Um,” she cleared her throat. “I think I’m going to go get a drink.”

A moment later, Felicity was walking away. Oliver shook his head as he watched her go, quickly collecting himself and following after her. “Felicity,” he said as he stepped through the crowd, keeping his eyes on her. “Felicity, wait.”

She didn’t stop, but he caught up as she reached the bar.

Oliver hovered over Felicity’s shoulder while she ordered a glass of wine, making his presence known when he stepped closer and ordered a whiskey for himself. She turned to face him as they waited for their drinks, but she didn’t meet his eye. Instead, Felicity scanned the crowd.

“Hey,” he mumbled. “Felicity, I’ve had more fun with you in the last couple of weeks than I’ve had in a long time—”

“Look at them,” Felicity lifted her chin, pointing his attention to whatever had caught hers. Oliver followed her gaze, finding Tommy and Alena on the dance floor. Tommy was being his usual goofy self, singing along to the song that was playing while he turned Alena in a circle, and then another one, and then another. Until her cheeks were pink and she was laughing. “Ten minutes ago, they hated each other.”

Oliver huffed out a laugh as he watched, seeing Tommy poke at Alena, tickling her and making her laugh even harder. “Alena hated him,” he pointed out. “But to be fair, that was never mutual.”

Felicity shrugged, “That’s true. But I think that we both know...those two aren’t right for each other. Alena doesn’t like random hookups, and all Tommy’s interested in is random hookups. She doesn’t want to waste her time with someone who isn’t serious, and he’s too easily distracted by beautiful women to put in any real effort with her.”

Oliver shook his head, “Maybe you’re right, or maybe that’s just how it seems right now. I think that people learn to compromise when they realize that they have real feelings for someone. Look,” he chuckled, “Alena is already more receptive to him than I’ve ever seen her.”

“But Tommy is who he is, right? He’s not going to completely change his nature if Alena gives him a chance. And my friend would end up getting hurt.”

Oliver paused, suddenly realizing that this was a very different conversation than he thought it was. 

Were they still talking about Alena and Tommy? Because it felt more like she was referring to the two of them.

Did Felicity think that he couldn’t change? That he didn’t want to? Was she afraid that he would end up hurting her?

Her eyes shifted up to him, and he made a point to hold her gaze. “I think that meeting the right person can change everything, Felicity,” he choked out, his heart hammering in his chest.

Felicity’s eyebrows furrowed as she thought about his words, “But it’s not like… Tommy and Alena are not strangers. We’ve made them cross paths plenty of times, Tommy has asked her out just as many times, but they never clicked before.” Felicity’s eyes flickered to their friends again, watching them for a few moments before she met Oliver’s gaze again. “So...why now? I mean...why do you think tonight would be any different? For them.”

He sighed, wanting so badly to tell her that at the moment, he didn’t give two shits about what was or was not happening between Tommy and Alena. All he cared about was what was going on between them. “I don’t know,” he answered. “Maybe sometimes...”

“Miss Smoak,” a voice cut in from behind him. 

Oliver closed his eyes. 

Maybe sometimes, it was all about timing.

“Sorry to interrupt,” the voice continued. 

Oliver turned around to find Ray Palmer standing there, smiling. The guy was starting to develop a habit of these interruptions. And Oliver wasn’t liking it one bit. “I was hoping to borrow Felicity for a few minutes. There are some people who would really like to meet our most promising young mind at Palmer Tech.”

Selfishly, he wanted to tell Palmer to come back later, once he and Felicity had stopped skirting around this conversation and actually figured their shit out. But of course, he wouldn’t dream of holding her back. “Of course,” Oliver stepped aside, putting on his best, most accommodating smile for Felicity. “Take all the time you need.”

As Ray ushered her away, Oliver took a seat at the bar. He nursed his whiskey and watched from his vantage point while Felicity approached a group of older men and women, all of whom embraced her with warm smiles and polite conversation. Naturally, she seemed a little stiff, and he imagined that she was probably wishing she’d had that glass of wine before facing the introductions.

Then Palmer brought her to a young couple where she repeated the process. 

Oliver eventually finished her wine, because for nearly an hour, Felicity was toted around the party by the CEO himself, as if she was the belle of the ball. He thought about intervening, but he knew Felicity well enough to know that she’d be embarrassed by that. Yet, with each greeting, Oliver could see that his girl was feeling more and more uncomfortable. She’d never really been a people person. She liked to keep her social interaction to a minimum and having to remember new faces and names made her nervous. 

Just as he was plotting a plan to save her that would be believable and subtle, Ray Palmer stepped in and did exactly that. Oliver watched as he leaned in and said something to Felicity. She smiled and nodded, and the next thing he knew, Palmer was walking her over to the dance floor.

Oliver instantly felt anger when Ray put his hands on Felicity. When they started to dance together. 

A wave of tension hit him; a territorial flame that burned in his chest and made him feel ashamed for it just as quickly. 

What was she doing to him?

He tried not to stare, but his eyes kept flickering to Felicity and Ray. And he hated the sick feeling in his gut as he realized that he was jealous.

Ray was driven and successful, and he’d made his own path for himself. Oppositely, Oliver was unmotivated and successful, and he’d been handed the keys to his family’s company when his father retired. Palmer seemed like a good man who would never cheat or lie, while Oliver had never even attempted to be faithful to one woman until his most recent idea to experimentally date his best friend.

And seeing Felicity dance with him...it hurt...because the two of them looked good together. When it was right there in front of him, it was impossible to deny that Ray Palmer and Felicity Smoak made sense.

Imagining himself with Felicity seemed much more far-fetched. He’d known that he didn’t stand a chance as soon as he met her.

Luckily, the torture on his heart only lasted a few minutes. 

Once the song was over, Felicity took a step back, smiling again as she said something to Ray, and then she started coming towards the bar. Towards him. 

Her eyes widened when she caught sight of him, and Oliver pulled out the stool beside him. He took in a deep, steadying breath as Felicity fell onto the chair. “I suck at small talk,” she mumbled under her breath. “I’m so glad that’s over.”

Flagging down the bartender, he ordered her another wine, the same fruity white kind he’d finished for her earlier. “Oh, thank you,” Felicity groaned, keeping her voice low, just for him. “And I’m sorry I left you alone for so long.”

Just being in her presence helped Oliver to relax a little, even if his insecurities and the view of her with Ray was still fresh in his mind. He bottled it, giving her a smirk as he whispered back, “I understand your pain.” 

He’d been through enough Queen Consolidated events to know how to play the games and suffer through the fake niceties. Even at a charity gala, everyone was always working an angle. Always looking to make some kind of connection, network themselves so that they could further their careers. 

“You got through it,” Oliver said fondly, patting her knee. “And it looked like you were doing great.” 

Felicity slipped her hand down to cover his, keeping it there, “It’s exhausting.”

“I know,” he chuckled. “But I’m sure Mr. Palmer is pleased that everyone could meet you.”

“Do you think you could call one of your drivers, have someone come pick us up?”

Oliver raised an eyebrow, “Already? Are you sure?”

Felicity nodded quickly, her eyes pleading with him. “I’ve danced with you, I’m about to have a glass of wine, I’ve talked to every person at this thing. I think I’m good.”

“Don’t forget your dance with Palmer.” The words were out before he could think twice. His eyes snapped down to her as he pinched his lips together, forcing an apologetic smile. 

Felicity cocked her head to the side, analyzing him. “You saw that, huh?”

“Well...yeah. It was hard not to notice my date being swept away by Prince Charming.”

She snorted at that. “Ray was just taking pity on me. The Andersons’ are relentless talkers and I didn’t know how to get away.”

“Ah,” Oliver tried to keep his voice light. “So he swooped in to save you?” He’d suspected as much.

Felicity gave him that look again. “Oliver Queen...are you jealous?”

Obviously.

“What? No. I mean— no. It’s just...you know that Palmer is um...into you, right?”

Felicity’s eyes widened, processing the idea. And Oliver held his breath, wondering if telling her would end up being the biggest mistake of his life. She and Palmer seemed like a perfect fit. With one rambling sentence, he could’ve just put that same idea into her head. 

“No way,” Felicity eventually decided, making a face at him. 

“If you say so,” he shrugged. If they could just leave the topic at that, he’d be fine with it.

She rolled her eyes at him, apparently on the same page. “How about you text that driver so we can get out of here?”

“Sure,” Oliver sighed. But as he pulled out his phone, he got a better idea. Instead of texting one of his drivers, Oliver sent a message to the head of his security and asked for a different favor. His motorcycle. They could drop it off at the Gardens in twenty minutes or less, which gave him and Felicity enough time to finish their drinks and make a clean exit.

When he eventually got a text back that the bike was in the parking lot, Oliver leaned closer to Felicity, “Ride’s here.”

She hummed happily, tipping her glass back to finish the last of her wine. “I’m just going to go check on Alena before we leave, you get the car and I’ll meet you out front?”

“Sounds good to me,” he smiled crookedly, imagining how she would react when she realized that they’d be taking his motorcycle home. She’d been on rides with him before, but not nearly enough. As Oliver walked out of the party, he made a mental note to himself about it. 

Get Felicity on the back of your bike more often. As often as possible.

Reaching the valet, he gave his name and let the kid behind the desk know that he was there for a motorcycle that would’ve been dropped off just a few minutes before. The kid’s eyes lit up, “We’ll have that right out for you, Mr. Queen,” he said, seemingly unable to stop himself from adding, “it’s a sweet ride.”

“Tell me about it,” Oliver grinned. And it would be even sweeter with Felicity wrapped around him. The young valet hurried off to bring the bike up from the parking lot, and Oliver glanced over his shoulder, hoping to see that Felicity wasn’t too far behind. 

Instead, he caught sight of someone much more surprising.

Laurel Lance was walking, or rather stumbling, down the steps from the Gardens. She’d almost reached the bottom when she glanced up and noticed him. She tripped on her feet then, her shoe catching on her dress as she failed to navigate the last step. Oliver instinctively sprang towards her, but he wasn’t quite quick enough. 

She fell, rather gracefully in typical Laurel fashion, onto her hands and knees. “Shit,” Oliver gasped, rushing over to help her up. Laurel groaned as he gently took her arm and pulled her back onto her feet. “Are you okay?”

Clutching her hands to his jacket, Laurel looked up at him and nodded. She didn’t seem very concerned that she was hurt, so he tried to step back. Laurel gripped him harder, “One sec,” she huffed, pausing for a moment as if to regain her balance.

Oliver stood still, waiting for her to let go because he wasn’t sure whether or not she’d fall again if he tried to move.

Laurel took in another deep breath, letting it out with a small chuckle. “You smell the same,” she mumbled, closing her eyes.

“Um…”

She leaned in closer, her face half covered by her hair, and pressed her nose against his neck, taking another deep breath. Oliver cleared his throat as he placed his hands on her shoulders, keeping her steady and guiding her to back up. She removed her face from his neck, but her glazed over eyes were still close as she whispered, “I forgot how good you smell.”

He stared at her as she took a step closer again, unsure what the hell he was supposed to say to that or how he should react. This was the woman who couldn’t stand him, after all. Despised him so much that she declined an invitation to her cousin’s wedding just because she knew that he would be there. She hated him, he accepted that, and they both moved on before they’d even gone away to college. 

This was not a situation that Oliver imagined ever finding himself in.

But as Laurel leaned closer, he didn’t move. She pressed her forehead against his temple, whispering in his ear, “There are a lot of things I’ve forgotten...that I wouldn’t mind remembering.”

Instinctively, Oliver understood that he disagreed. He knew that he would never go down that road with Laurel Lance again. Nor did he ever want to.

But in that moment, all Oliver could see was Felicity with Ray Palmer; the kind of man who would never hurt her. All he could hear was Tommy’s voice; telling him that he was the kind of man who would. And to add to the undeniable signs that were piling up right in front of his face, here was his ex-girlfriend who hated his guts because he’d lied to her, cheated on her, and broken her heart. And yet after all these years, he felt like he was inexplicably right back in that toxic cycle. 

Oliver couldn’t help but wonder if he really was the ‘piece of shit’ that Laurel once told him he would always be. His skin crawled at the thought. And in truth, at Laurel’s touch. But he didn’t push her away. In that brief moment, he certainly felt like a piece of shit. But maybe after all the mistakes he’d made, he didn’t deserve to feel good about himself. Maybe the toxic, hellish cycle he’d experienced with Laurel was what he deserved.

It felt like nothing had changed.

It felt like he hadn’t changed.

And that made him feel sick to his stomach.

“Nice, Oliver,” Felicity’s voice came from beside him.

His head snapped up, his eyes landing on hers as she stormed right by them. And the fire that he saw in her gaze made his heart launch into his throat.

Fuck.

He pulled away from Laurel, but Felicity was already walking away, ignoring the valet as she grabbed the keys to Tommy’s limo from the wall. One of the boys tried to stop her, but when he saw that angry look on her face, he quickly shut his mouth. She took the keys and headed off down the trail towards the parking lot.

“Felicity!” Oliver called after her, stopping long enough to make sure that Laurel was at least able to stand before he went after Felicity. “Wait a second!”

She didn’t slow down at all. 

“Oh no,” Felicity called over her shoulder. “Don’t let me stop you, Oliver! Wouldn’t want to interrupt such a heartfelt reunion!”

“Felicity, stop! Please.” She ignored him, heading straight for the limo near the back of the parking lot at what seemed like the fastest pace she could manage in her heels. “It wasn’t what it looked like!” Oliver caught up, keeping pace beside her.

“Oh my god!” Felicity shot him a look that could kill, tossing her hands in the air, “you sound like such a cliche!”

“I’m sorry,” he reached for her arm, trying to make her stop, but Felicity pulled out of his grasp, her footsteps quickening. “Please, trust me. It wasn’t what you think.” He was pleading, needing her to hear him. And he wasn’t above begging. Because whatever Felicity thought she was seeing between him and Laurel was definitely not what was happening.

“Oh? Then what was it?” She finally stopped, turning around on the sidewalk as she peered up at him. “Because it looked to me like your ex-girlfriend practically had her tongue in your ear!”

“Look…I...nothing happened, okay? Nothing.” He closed his eyes, “It was so stupid, Felicity. So, so stupid. She was drunk, she tripped on the stairs, so I helped her up. She could barely stand, and I was just...”

Felicity let out an incredulous breath, “What’s the verdict then?” 

“What?” 

She gave him a sharp, expectant look, “Does Laurel Lance still do it for you, Oliver? Are you still that asshole who goes on a date with a girl, one who won’t sleep with you, so you decide to go home with whoever will!?” Felicity put a hand up as soon as he opened his mouth to respond. She shook her head, “You don’t need to bother. I saw it with my own eyes. So thank you for that.”

“Felicity...she barely touched me. I wouldn’t have let it come to that.” 

“Well…it looked to me like if I hadn’t caught you, you would have done exactly that.” Her lip curled as she glanced away. And the expression on her face made his stomach twist into knots. “It’s what you do best, right? Is that the point you’re trying to make, Oliver? Is that the message you wanted to get across to me?” She let out an incredulous breath, glancing away. “Because I hear it loud and clear, okay? Point taken.”

He’d never seen that look on Felicity’s face. She’d never looked at him that way. Shocked and disappointed. He swore he even saw something close to disgust flash in her eyes, and he felt desperate to take it all back. Reverse the last five minutes and tell himself how stupid he’d been. Whatever self-pity he’d gotten caught up in a few minutes ago...it was nothing to the way it felt to see Felicity Smoak looking at him like this.

He had never wanted Felicity to look at him like that. One of the things he kept closest to his heart, one of the things he kept sacred, was the man that Felicity saw in him. But the expression on her face now; hurt and betrayed and angry...

It rattled him to his core. 

When Felicity took a step back, he was too terrified of what he saw in her eyes to stop her. And when she walked away from him, got into the limo, and drove away, he was still frozen. 

As she drove by, Felicity didn’t even look at him. And that terrified him even more. He couldn’t remember a day where he’d ever made her this pissed off at him. But it wasn’t just anger. She was upset with him. Just like she warned him she would be if he broke their promise. Which, apparently, she thought he did.

He just needed to explain what happened with Laurel. 

No...he needed to tell her everything.

Oliver snapped out of it, quickly jogging back up the trail to the valet, knowing that his bike would’ve been brought up by now. 

Thankfully, Laurel was gone by the time he reached the party again. But Tommy and Alena were standing outside. Tommy raised his arms out, “What the hell happened? We just saw Felicity stealing our ride.”

“Sorry,” Oliver grumbled, nodding to the valet as he took his keys back and climbed onto his motorcycle. “You guys might just want to call a cab.”

“Hey, man, she looked pretty upset. Maybe you should just give her some space.”

Oliver couldn’t help but laugh, more out of disbelief than anything. “Why am I not surprised that that’s your advice?”

Tommy held his hands up in surrender, “I don’t know what that’s supposed to mean. I’m just saying that whatever it is, maybe you should let Felicity cool down before you try to talk to her.”

“You don’t think I know exactly what you’ve been trying to do all night?” Oliver snapped.

“I’m just trying to help,” Tommy said, his eyes widening. 

“By getting into my head, telling me I’m going to hurt her, making me doubt myself? Seriously, Tommy...is this all a game to you?” 

Tommy shook his head, “I’ve been trying to protect you from getting hurt, Oliver!” 

He gave his so-called friend a disbelieving laugh, the humor lacking. “No, you were trying to protect yourself. Because you’re scared that if I finally get serious about someone, it’ll somehow mean that you have to grow the fuck up, too.”

“I…” Tommy sighed, squeezing his eyes shut as he rubbed his forehead. “I’m sorry, Oliver. I wasn’t trying to psych you out. I just wanted to make sure that you were thinking this through. I know how much Felicity means to you, and I didn’t want to see…” he gestured around them, “well, exactly this.”

Unfortunately, Oliver’s anger was still hot and the sting of Felicity leaving was still hurting. “I’m not that guy anymore, Tommy,” he growled. “But you still are. And I think that bothers you more than you can even admit. You can’t accept that I’ve changed because you’re terrified that you never will.”

Tommy stared at him for a long moment. And then he nodded, his mouth tipping up in a sad smile. “I think you’re probably right about that. But Oliver, I wouldn’t be your best friend if I didn’t at least ask... Are you sure about this? About her?”

The question Tommy asked wasn’t whether or not he deserved Felicity. That was the internal struggle that he honestly still wasn’t sure about. But Tommy was asking whether or not he wanted to be with her. And the answer to that was easy.

Oliver’s eyes flickered to Alena, aware that Felicity’s friend was listening and it wasn’t just Tommy who would hear the truth that was eating him up inside. The one thing that he was sure about and the one thing that needed to be said.

“I love her.”

“Finally,” Tommy nodded, like he’d known all along. “I was beginning to think you were going to punch me in the face before you admitted it.” His friend shook his head as he reached over, turning the key on the bike and bringing the engine to life. “So go get her.”

Chapter Text

For the first morning in years, Felicity didn’t wake up wanting coffee. After she’d left the gala, her stomach had been in knots all night. She’d slept like shit, spending most of the night up and thinking about what happened with Oliver.

Seeing Laurel’s hands on him had made her feel sick. And now she felt hurt. More hurt than she’d ever wanted to let a man make her feel. Especially not Oliver. He was the one man who she was never supposed to fall in love with. Because he was the only one she didn’t want to ever be hurt by. He was the only one who could make her feel this awful.

Somewhere deep down, Felicity knew that she’d been telling herself that since the day she met him. And maybe that was because in that same spot deep down, she’d known that he was the one man who could break her heart if she allowed him to have that kind of power over her.

God… And to think that this pain was only a fraction of what it could be if she really opened herself up to Oliver Queen.

At least it was over.

Before they’d officially made their deal, she told him that she would be pissed at him if he pulled something like this. Now that he’d actually done it, Felicity was more than angry. She knew that she had a right to be upset with Oliver. But she didn’t have a right to be heartbroken over Oliver.

All she needed was some time.

Lick her wounds. Be alone in her misery. Hopefully forget the sight of Laurel seductively whispering in Oliver’s ear, since that was still replaying in her mind over and over again. 

Once she got her head on straight again, she could talk to Oliver. Maybe she could tell him that her minor freak out was a combination of alcohol and shock. Then they could agree that this silly ‘dating’ thing wasn’t good for their friendship and they could forget the whole thing. She just wanted everything to go back to normal.

No, she wanted them to be better.

But she’d rather have him as a friend than nothing at all. It didn’t matter that she was still angry at him and upset about the gala... that would always be true. He was so special to her, she’d take friendship if that was all he could give her. She’d take whatever kept him in her life.

She just needed some time to get over these stupid, romantic feelings he was stirring inside of her.

Unfortunately, Felicity was still in the thick of her self-pity, staring out the window as she tried to convince herself that everything would be okay, when a knock on the door interrupted all the brooding.

She got up, begrudgingly, and made it halfway to the door before she realized who it probably was.

Oliver had called her last night. And texted her. She’d eventually turned her phone off. And twenty minutes after that, she’d heard a knock at her door but hadn’t bothered then, knowing that it was him and really not wanting to talk. Eventually he must have given up and gone home. 

She still hadn’t checked her messages and it was too early for most of her friends to be awake, so she had to assume that Oliver had come back.

Still, Felicity tiptoed over to the door to check through the peephole. Even if she wasn’t ready to talk about last night, she just wanted to get a look at him. See how he was.

God, she had a problem.

Her plan was ruined when she peeked outside and saw Sara Lance standing on her porch, leaning against the doorframe as she waited to be let in. With a deep breath, Felicity swung the door open.

Sara flashed her smile, “Why do you look so disappointed, Fel?” she asked, breezing into the apartment. “Hoping to see someone else here bright and early, groveling for forgiveness at your feet, perhaps?”

Felicity slammed the door shut, “I’m not disappointed. And don’t call me Fel.”

“Touchy this morning,” Sara tsked at her. “I see you’re not in any better of a mood than Oliver is.”

She pouted, crossing her arms over her chest defensively. “You saw him?”

“Oh yeah,” Sara scoffed. “He called me last night when you didn’t answer your door. Gave me the whole story. He’s pretty upset, Felicity.”

“He is?” Straightening her shoulders, Felicity caught herself, “I mean… No, he has nothing to be upset about. I’m the one who should be upset by last night.”

“Hm,” Sara narrowed her eyes. “Well, I agree. Just so we’re clear...I think he’s an idiot. And I came by to see if you wanted to go to the beach today.”

Felicity blinked back at her friend, trying to follow, but she hadn’t had a single drop of coffee and Sara’s energy was far too bubbly for the early hour. “The beach?”

Sara nodded, waving her hand towards Felicity’s room. “Come on, go get ready and we’ll stop for iced coffee on the way to the ocean.”

“I don’t know…” She’d been pretty set on spending the day sulking alone. She was a glutton for torture like that.

Of course, Sara saw straight through her. “You can mope in your apartment all day or you can mope at the beach all day. At least my idea will get you a tan. And a coffee,” she raised her eyebrows, “my treat.”

Felicity let out a long breath before giving in, “Okay, fine.”

Sara put her hands up in triumph, “Yay! Beach day!” Then she grabbed Felicity’s shoulders and shoved her down the hallway, telling her again to get ready.

Once she’d changed into her bathing suit, Felicity threw a sundress over it and then tossed what she needed into her beach bag; making sure she had a towel, sunscreen, a change of clothes, and a book to read. 

Minutes later, they were on the road.

Felicity suggested that they stop at her favorite coffee shop down the street, and Sara nodded in agreement, driving in that direction. She was actually starting to look forward to the day. She could read, people watch, dip her feet in the water, and get some much needed sun and fresh air. Plus, Sara wasn’t the kind of friend to push. Felicity knew that if she felt like talking to her about Oliver and the Palmer Tech gala, Sara would listen, but she wouldn’t pester.

“You know,” Felicity smiled as they walked up to the coffee shop. “I actually think this will be fun.”

Sara glanced up at her and winced, “Now I’m actually starting to feel bad.”

Felicity frowned in confusion as they stepped through the door, “Feel bad for what?”

Sara didn’t answer. But she didn’t have to. As they walked through the door, Felicity instantly noticed Oliver sitting at a table by the window, his eyes already on them. 

Her heart sank.

He stood up, hesitant as he approached. Felicity quickly spun around to narrow her eyes at Sara. “You set me up,” she accused, genuinely feeling betrayed by it despite the fact that Sara had known Oliver since they were kids and it shouldn’t have been surprising. Raising her hands in surrender, Sara began to back away without another word, heading for the door. Felicity’s eyes widened, “You’re unbelievable.”

“Unbelievably helpful,” Sara scoffed. “Just talk to him. I think you’ll feel better once you do.”

She was still glaring at Sara as her friend retreated.

“Hi,” Oliver cleared his throat from behind her.

Totally not ready for this.

“Hey,” she forced a smile anyway.

“I tried calling you last night.”

Felicity bit her lip, looking to Sara for some assistance, but finding that her friend was already outside...getting into her car. “Unbelievable,” she muttered under her breath before turning back to Oliver. He was looking down at her with those big blue puppy dog eyes of his. And she felt like her anger was already fading. “I know,” she sighed. “I’m sorry, I just needed some space. Actually, that was sort of the plan for today, too…”

Oliver frowned, “I’m sorry to ambush you…I just…I need to talk to you.”

“Well, I was prepared to lay in the sand all day,” Felicity winced, patting her hand on the bag that was slung over her shoulder. “Not really in the mood for this right now, Oliver. Hence the unanswered phone calls.”

“I’m sorry,” Oliver said again, but as he pinched his lips together, he didn't look all that sorry. He gestured to the counter, “You’re right, this wasn’t fair to you. But…um, can I at least get you a coffee while we’re here?” 

Felicity considered it, then slowly nodded in agreement. Good lord did she need caffeine today. 

By the time he ordered them each an iced coffee, the room had grown quite crowded. “Felicity, can we get out of here and talk? Please?” Oliver finally asked as he passed her the cup. A man bumped into him, trying to get in line. “Maybe back at your place or, uh, somewhere a little more private?”

For a brief moment, it was tempting to say no. She could walk home and spend the day alone like she’d originally planned. She’d protect her heart that way. Yet Felicity found herself nodding instead. Oliver smiled, relief flooding his features. And Felicity narrowed her eyes, “Don’t get ahead of yourself, Queen. I’m still mad.”

He sighed as he placed a hand on the base of her spine, giving her chills, and guided her out of the coffee shop.

As soon as they stepped outside, Felicity began walking towards her townhouse, but Oliver took her hand to stop her. He pointed to his car that was parked across the street, “Would you maybe want to go for a drive?”

Meeting his eyes and seeing the hopeful look on his face, Felicity felt the rest of her resolve slip away. “Alright…”

A smile pulled at his lips again when he leaned down to open the car door for her. And once they were on the road, Felicity glanced at him out of the corner of her eye, wondering how he planned to start this conversation or if she was even ready to have it. She felt so certain that it would be the end of their experiment. All she could do was hope they could start to get their friendship back and pray that the last three weeks hadn’t destroyed it completely. “Did you listen to any of my messages last night?” Oliver eventually asked, his voice quiet.

Felicity cleared her throat, taking a sip of coffee to give herself a moment to think. But she couldn’t exactly lie about that. “No,” she answered honestly, keeping her eyes on her hands. 

Oliver placed his hand over hers, his touch careful and tender as he rubbed his thumb across her knuckle. “Hey,” he whispered, “That’s okay. I’d rather talk to you about this in person anyway.”

“Right,” Felicity mumbled back, mesmerized by the tingling sensation that stemmed from his touch, flying across her skin like wildfire.

Oh she was so screwed. So so so screwed. How was she ever supposed to be friends with him when it felt like this just to touch him?

“So,” she quickly changed the subject when she realized that he was gearing up to dive into the mess of their issues. “Where are we going?”

Glancing down at her, Oliver muttered, “Um, well, I mean, we—we could go to the beach? If that’s what you had planned to do today.”

Felicity couldn’t help but smile as he floundered, looking him up and down. The jeans and gray t-shirt he was wearing looked great on him, but… “You don’t really look ready for a beach.”

He gave her an amused smile, “As long as you let me sit on your towel with you, I’ll be fine.”

“Okay,” she laughed. “I’ll even share my sunscreen.”

“Oh,” Oliver raised an eyebrow, “Well we don’t want another tan-line-catastrophe like last summer, so maybe you should just leave all of the sunscreen responsibilities to me.”

Felicity rolled her eyes, “You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

“Mmm,” he hummed dreamily. “I absolutely would.”

Their mood slowly shifted as their eyes met again, and they each seemed to remember at the same time that things between them weren’t as easy and carefree as they’d once been. She wasn’t supposed to be joking with him. Or flirting with him. But the jackass made it so easy. For a moment, she forgot.  

And it felt good to forget. Oliver Queen had always been her favorite distraction, after all. Clearing her throat again, Felicity glanced out the window, watching the trees as they cut along her view. She couldn’t shake the feeling that this could be one of her last good days with Oliver before things got really messy. Because once they had that talk...

“Felicity, about last night—”

“Don’t,” she whispered, her eyes slipping shut as her breath caught in her throat. She shook her head, “Let’s just...have a good day. We can talk about it later.”

And so they drove in silence for nearly two hours.

The day grew warmer as they drove out of Starling, away from the humidity and the fog. The air was fresh as they made their way up the coast; and it was simple enough to roll their windows down, turn the music up, and enjoy his company and the sunshine.

Although Oliver and Felicity didn’t speak much for most of the morning, things at least got a little less awkward. Once they reached Coast City, they walked around the shops by the pier until Oliver found a suitable bathing suit, and Felicity came away with some new sunglasses. Then they went down to the beach and picked out a spot, where they spent a couple of hours lying side by side on her towel. Even though she tensed up a bit when he offered to put sunscreen on her shoulders, it was hard to feel anything other than relaxed when she had the warmth of the sun on her skin and the sound of the waves in her ears. 

Still, Felicity had to actively push thoughts of Laurel Lance and the gala out of her mind more than once throughout the day. Every now and then, she would feel Oliver’s attention on her, or their eyes would meet and she could tell that he was biting his tongue. She could see how much he wanted to say something. 

But he didn’t. Because she asked him not to. And she didn’t say anything about it either. 

Instead, they spent the day with comfortable, surface-level conversation, which kind of made Felicity feel like they were new friends again. Strangers. In a bizarre, sort of sad way. 

Neither of them acknowledged what they probably should have just acknowledged. They both ignored the elephant in the room, or rather on the beach, in favor of tip-toeing around the other’s feelings.

It wasn’t like them to avoid such things.

Yet somehow, they knew that this time was different. It was as if they both knew that everything would be different. This little game they were playing that seemed innocent enough at first, but had proven to be incredibly dangerous to her heart... once they talked, it would be over.

Soon enough, it was late afternoon.

Felicity had her eyes closed and her chin angled up at the sun, and that was when she felt the first raindrop. 

It landed right on her cheek. She frowned, opening her eyes and looking at the clouds above that had turned dark since the last time she’d seen the sky. Sitting up, she tipped her head towards Oliver, seeing that he was fast asleep on the towel beside her. And as she glanced around the beach, she realized that the crowd had mostly cleared out. The people who were left seemed to be packing their things up, too.

“Hey,” she nudged Oliver’s shoulder, waking him up. “Looks like there’s a storm coming in.”

He rubbed his eye, looking to the sky first, then to the remaining beach-goers as they made their escape. Felicity felt a few more droplets of rain land on her skin as Oliver turned his attention to the water. She watched him as he watched the rough turn of the waves for a long moment, his head seemingly somewhere else. And she couldn’t help but wonder how someone she’d known for so long...could strike her as such a beautiful mystery.

It wasn’t until Felicity shivered that Oliver broke his broody-staring contest with the sea. The wind was picking up, and the rain was getting heavier by the second. “You’re cold,” he mumbled, frowning as he stood up. After helping her to her feet, Oliver shook out the oversized beach towel they’d been sharing. Felicity slid her dress back on, then he wrapped the towel around her and quickly got dressed himself.

They failed to make it to the car before the downpour, each of them breathless as they ran from the sheets of rain that chased them. The place looked completely deserted. They seemed to be the last ones in town to get the memo about the storm.

“Wow,” Felicity chuckled as they slammed the doors, cutting off the sound of the torrential downpour. “I survived the whole day without getting my hair wet. Now look at me.” Oliver laughed too, reaching over to brush a dripping lock of hair out of her face. Felicity sucked in a breath, instinctively turning her cheek into the warmth of his palm. He sighed too, his eyes bouncing between hers as she looked up at him. “I guess I should have checked the weather,” she finished her thought in a whisper.

“Felicity…” he breathed. His fingers curled into her hair. His eyes surprised her, pleading with her just before he mumbled, “I love you.”

She stared back at him, her heart jumping in her chest. 

But he’d said that to her before. She had told him the same thing, too. Countless times. Of course they loved each other. As friends. Yet the way Oliver blurted out the words and the way he was looking at her made her feel like he might mean it in a different way. 

Don’t go there, Smoak.

Leaning away, Felicity forced a smile, “I love you too, Oliver," she brushed it off. "You know that.”

He tipped his head to the side, a quiet sadness in his eyes as he studied her. “Do you remember what you said to me when we first started this arrangement a couple of weeks ago? When you were at my place and I cooked you dinner...you said that sometimes when you meet someone who matters to you, there’s a part of you that just knows they’re going to matter. So you remember it.”

“Yeah…” Felicity blinked up at him, confused.

“Honey,” he whispered. “You have always mattered to me. Every word you say and every opinion that you have is important to me. I just wish I’d known back then…” he paused, shaking his head as he held her gaze, “how much you were going to matter. There are a lot of things that I would have done differently.”

As sweet as the words were, and as much as they warmed her heart, there was only one image that came to Felicity’s mind in that moment. And it was the same one that she’d been trying all day to suppress. “Things like…kissing your ex-girlfriend while you were on a date with your fake-girlfriend?”

Oliver’s eyes darkened slightly, his nose screwing up with a soft grunt of disagreement. “I didn’t kiss Laurel last night.”

“Did she kiss you?” Felicity shot back.

“No,” Oliver answered just as quickly. Then he sighed, “But I think she was probably about to.”

Felicity nodded, believing as much, considering her mind was still scarred from it. “The way it looked to me...you were probably about to let her.”

Oliver’s eyes flickered to hers, “I wouldn’t have, Felicity.”

“Well,” she pursed her lips. “I guess we’ll never actually know, will we?” Letting out a humorless chuckle, Felicity glanced away, “Maybe I should have waited a few seconds longer before interrupting your little moment.”

“Maybe you should have,” he grumbled back. “But then maybe you would have seen that I had no intention of kissing her and you wouldn’t have a reason to be pushing me away right now. Maybe that’s the real problem here.”

Felicity looked back at him, her eyes narrowing. “Maybe,” she snapped, “You should stop blaming me for your shitty choices, and just drive.”

He huffed out a breath of annoyance, “Felicity—”

“No,” she shook her head. “I mean it, Oliver. I don’t want to fight with you. Not about this.”

“You’ve never been afraid to fight with me before. Or tell me what you’re thinking. Why is this different?”

As Felicity stared at him, the words were right there on the tip of her tongue. They were words she’d spoken to him before, yet the way she felt had changed and she just couldn’t deny that to herself anymore. Everything had changed and she couldn’t pretend that she couldn’t see it.

Because I love you.

Because I’m afraid of losing you.

“Please just drive,” Felicity pleaded instead, her voice a mere whisper through the rain that pounded on the windshield. 

With one last long look, Oliver finally sighed, his eyes softening in what seemed like disappointment. And Felicity let herself breathe again, relieved that he had dropped the subject before they got too upset about it. She had a feeling that her first instinct to take some time away from Oliver was probably the right instinct. She was still too hurt and too confused to act like it didn’t bother her. In a state like this, she might just say something that she means.

I love you.

I can't lose  you.

The car ride was only supposed to be a couple of hours. But thirty minutes after they left the beach, the storm became rougher than before. The sky turned ominously dark and the roads were slick. The rain, hail, and wind were all making Felicity’s anxiety spike as she noted the fallen trees and listened to the thunder rumbling in the distance, as if in warning. Even Oliver seemed nervous, his eyes focused on the road and his hands clenched on the wheel, the windshield wipers working as fast as they could to clear the rain that just kept pounding. The minutes continued to tick by, but they were barely making any progress getting home because of how slow he had to drive. 

Ahead of them, lightning struck, threads of angry yellow violence that descended from above. Felicity finally gave in as a crack of thunder seemed to answer, the sound booming, closer than the last one. “Maybe we should pull over,” she finally spoke. “Wait it out.”

“I don’t think this is going to end anytime soon,” Oliver replied, not moving his eyes an inch from the road. “There’s a motel up ahead that I remember seeing on our way in. We can stop for a bit until the storm passes.”

Even though a big part of her wanted to say no to that idea, she valued both of their lives. And a motel seemed safer than sitting and freezing on the side of the road in his car. “How much farther?”

“Just a couple of minutes.”

If they’d been able to drive more than ten miles an hour, he might have been right. Instead Felicity held her breath for another twenty minutes until she eventually saw a glowing neon sign for the Coast City Motel. 

Oliver parked, and they both quickly made their way inside, finding themselves freshly soaked, but they were all too happy to finally be out of the car and off the road. 

Felicity smiled at the receptionist as they walked inside; a young girl with dark hair and three piercings in her eyebrow that at first glance, made her seem older than she probably was. The girl had a name tag that read Tara and she stared at them as they approached the desk, chewing gum and looking unamused that they’d interrupted her phone scrolling with their appearance. 

“Hi,” Oliver started, “we were just on our way home and got caught—”

“$500 for the night,” the girl deadpanned, cutting him off. Her eyes flickered to Felicity, “$1,000 if you need two rooms.”

Felicity raised an eyebrow as Oliver stared at the girl. They both gave the lobby a quick assessment, each of them certain in a matter of seconds that the establishment was not worth such a high price. “Will you be providing a 5-course meal with our stay?” Oliver asked sarcastically. 

Tara flashed a snide smile in return, “Price goes up when we’re your only option.” Her eyes moved to the window, nodding at the storm that carried on outside. “Which it seems like we are. You could take it up with the owner, but he’s drunk in room five and he hates to be disturbed. As long as I give him a cut, he usually thinks my pricing is fair, but I can have him come out if you feel like wasting the next forty minutes debating it with him.” Oliver let out an annoyed grunt, and Tara’s smile widened. “What’s the problem, pal? You look like you could afford to buy this whole place if you wanted to.”

Felicity held in her laughter, thinking that the girl had some savvy business strategy that she could at least appreciate. But of course, taking advantage of two people who clearly needed help was entirely unethical. 

Oliver rolled his eyes, picking up on Felicity’s amusement as he reached into his pocket. Tara perked up at the sight of his wallet. “So, one room or two?” 

“One is fine,” Oliver grumbled back. Then he looked to Felicity, “If that’s fine with you, of course.” 

Felicity chuckled, offering a nod. She knew that he wouldn’t argue over a second room if she insisted on it, but he also had a lot of pride. He didn’t want to give Tara the satisfaction of paying her that much money. Besides, it wasn’t like they’d be there long.

The receptionist grinned as Oliver handed over his credit card, then she dangled a room key from her finger, “Go outside and take a left,” her tone was much more chipper now. “Room nine.”

Felicity and Oliver went back outside without another word. Their walk was, thankfully, covered by the roof, and the room wasn't too far from the main entrance. 

They found the door with a chipped "9" at the top and made their way inside in silence.

Neither of them were particularly surprised or impressed by the room, especially considering what it cost. There was a queen-sized bed that had two pillows and a blanket, which luckily seemed to be in decent shape. On either side of the bed, there were two nightstands with lights bolted to the walls above. Across the bed, there was a wooden dresser that had an old television on top, which was also bolted down to the furniture. Oliver flipped on the light as Felicity took a quick glance around, their eyes meeting again as the door shut with a loud thump.

Crossing her arms over her chest, Felicity shrugged, her eyes falling to the stained carpet. “I suppose it could be worse.”

Oliver nodded in agreement, his eyes shifting around the room again. “I’ll just um...run back out to the car and grab your bag.”

“Thank you,” Felicity answered.

Once Oliver was gone, she walked into the bathroom, deciding on a quick shower to wash away the sand, sweat, and rain of the day. Of course, the water pressure sucked and there were no amenities aside from a towel. But seeing that the towels looked and smelled clean, Felicity began to undress, leaving her clothes on the floor.

While she waited for the water to heat up, she heard Oliver gently knock on the door. “Come in,” she called, glancing over her shoulder at him as he opened it. Felicity watched his mouth pop open and snap shut just as quickly. And she couldn’t help but smile; part of her strangely satisfied whenever she could get a reaction out of the guy who was hardly ever surprised. 

Letting the towel slip down her chest, just an inch lower, made his eyes widen. Which was also immensely satisfying. Then he quickly looked away, his cheeks flushing red. And Felicity’s smile grew. 

“I…” Oliver cleared his throat, still not meeting her gaze as he held up her bag. 

“Thank you,” Felicity murmured, way too amused by his shyness. 

It wasn’t like him at all.

But she enjoyed it nonetheless.

“I’ll just um...is there anything else you need?”

She shook her head, “No, I think I’m all set.”

He simply nodded, closing the door again as if he couldn’t get out fast enough. Felicity chuckled under her breath, letting the towel drop to the floor. She looked in the mirror as she took note of the slight sunburn on her cheeks and chest. 

The water barely qualified as warm, but Felicity stepped under the stream anyway. She quickly rinsed off, feeling a little bit better when she stepped out. She slipped on the t-shirt and underwear that she had in her bag, the only clothes she had unless she wanted to put a pair of jean shorts on, which she really didn’t. Then she dug through the bag, relieved when she finally found the comb that she remembered throwing in there. 

Felicity did the best she could to get the knots out, and then she braided her hair to the side, knowing she’d be better off doing that than letting it dry into a frizzy mess.

When she was finished, she walked out into the room, tugging on the bottom of the t-shirt in an attempt to cover her thighs. Oliver was propped up on the bed, his arms crossed over his chest with the television remote in one hand as he flipped through the channels, dressed only in the jeans he’d had on before they went to the beach. The other damp clothes he had placed on the heater by the window. 

His eyes swung from the TV screen to her, automatically trailing down her body. Unlike before, he didn’t blanch at her lack of clothing. Instead, Felicity had the pleasure of watching his eyes darken as they traveled back up to her face.

Finally, he looked away. “I found this in my car,” he held up a sweatshirt that he’d left on the bed beside him. “Thought you might want something warm to sleep in.”

The look on his face was too tempting to just ignore. Felicity couldn’t help herself from shaking her head, walking closer as she whispered, “No thanks, I think I’m fine like this.” 

Stopping at the edge of the bed, Felicity faked a yawn before lifting her arms above her head and stretching. Just as she glanced down at Oliver again, she caught his eyes dropping to her abdomen, the small patch of skin above her underwear that peeked out when her t-shirt rode up. And she was rewarded with that wide-eyed, flushed-cheeks look on his face all over again. “I’m beat,” she sighed, trying to hide her smirk. 

“Yeah,” Oliver choked out. “You should rest. We might as well just stay the night at this point. I’m sure the storm will pass by morning.”

“Well you did spend a lot of money on this room,” Felicity answered as she climbed into bed beside him. “Maybe we should steal something. Make it worth it.”

He scoffed, “Even if everything wasn’t bolted down, I don’t think there’s anything worth $500 in here.”

Felicity settled into the mattress, which was lumpy but not entirely unpleasant, and turned over to face him. “Who said anything about the money? We’re here for the memories, Queen.”

Oliver’s lips twitched with a smile, his eyes on her face as she tried to get comfortable. “Oh, this day has been quite the memory.”

“True,” Felicity chuckled, “I’m not sure I’ve ever seen you look so nervous. Your knuckles were white, you were gripping that steering wheel so hard.”

“I could feel your anxiety the entire time. I knew you’d probably kill me if I didn’t get you here in one piece.”

“Yeah,” Felicity sighed. “That was definitely a new experience. Glad we didn’t die.”

Oliver grinned back at her, “Me too. Let’s never do it again.”

Felicity nodded, “Agreed. And I mean, at least this part feels a little more familiar. Safe.”

His eyebrows furrowed as he glanced around the room, giving her a strange look when he met her eyes again. “Sleeping in a sketchy motel is familiar to you?”

Instantly, Felicity felt a blush rise to her cheeks. “Um…I meant, more like… us.”

He paused, looking down at their bodies.

It was the way they laid beside each other with ease. She’d climbed into bed with him without thinking twice. And he probably never even thought to ask if she had a problem with it. Because sharing a bed was nothing new for them. It was the way they talked to each other in that bed. Two people who knew each other and loved each other. It felt natural. That’s what they were. 

Us.

When she wasn’t so busy worrying about losing him forever, it seemed easy. 

“Are we ever going to finish talking about what happened last night?” he asked in a whisper, his eyes scorching straight through her. “Are we ever going to move past it?”

Felicity knew that he meant the Laurel thing. They could forgive and forget and never speak of it again. But what if she couldn’t move past her feelings for him? Then what would become of them? 

Surely, things between them couldn’t be as natural and easy as they felt now...if he knew how she felt about him.

Felicity turned over to look up at the ceiling so that he couldn’t look into her eyes and read her mind the way he always seemed to. “Talk about what?” she deflected. “The fact that I caught you feeling up your ex while you were my date to a charity gala for my job?” 

Oliver let out an annoyed sound; half-huff, half-growl. “Felicity, I told you that it wasn’t like that. I promise that that’s the truth. What can I do to make you believe me?”

If Felicity was in the right frame of mind, she might be more willing to have a real conversation. But her thoughts were in fight or flight mode. Fight with him until they both fell back on the flight response. Then the whole topic would blow over.

Don’t forget the last time you tried that strategy, she scolded herself. He ended up convincing you to be his fake girlfriend for a month.

“I guess I shouldn’t be surprised, huh? When you first told me you wanted to experiment with monogamy, I told you that I didn’t think you were capable of it. Agreeing to date you for a month was my stupid mistake.”

Oliver sat up, pushing onto his elbows until he could see her face. Felicity chewed on her lip, still not meeting his gaze as she felt him analyzing her. 

Oliver clearly wanted to make up.

Unfortunately, Felicity wasn’t in the mood to.

Or maybe he was right before...she was too afraid to. Maybe the gala really was an excuse to bow out before her feelings got too real. Well, if that was the case, her head was running a little slow...because her heart was already lost in him in a way she’d never felt before.

“Why are you this upset, Felicity?” He finally dared to ask. “If you’re saying the last couple of weeks between us weren’t real, then whether I kissed Laurel or not…” her heart sank at those words. “Why would it bother you?”

Hurt came along with the sinking feeling in her stomach. And embarrassment. And anger. And defensiveness. “Because you’re the one who broke your promise!” Felicity cried. “I kept my word, Oliver. ‘Commit to the commitment,’ remember? ‘If I fuck up, you’ll have every right to be pissed at me,’ remember?”

“If you would just listen to me—”

“And I told you that if we did this, then we were going to commit. Don’t act like I’m not allowed to be pissed at you!”

Oliver raised his hand in surrender, “You are. I shouldn’t have let Laurel anywhere near me, Felicity. Not just for your sake or the sake of our agreement. It was about me! Laurel is not the person I want to be with. We’re toxic together. I know that! But when you saw me with her...I was feeling pretty toxic.”

“I don’t know, Oliver…”

“Felicity, you ran. You didn’t even give me a chance to explain. So I can’t help but wonder, if maybe when you saw me and Laurel, you saw what you wanted to see.”

Her mouth fell open in shock, certain that he was wrong about that. “You think I wanted to see her with her hands all over you!?”

“I think if this was just an experiment, then it wouldn’t have bothered you this much!” he fired back. “I think it gave you an excuse. I think that maybe you were looking for a reason to run, and maybe when you thought you found one, you were relieved.”

“Oh,” she shook her head. “Maybe I’m scared, Oliver. Maybe I didn’t like what I saw and that freaked me out more than I’m willing to admit. But you’re wrong if you think I was relieved. You're wrong if you think I felt anything other than disgust.”

His eyes dropped, his face falling as if she’d just given him the worst news. As if she’d just confirmed what he’d already been thinking. “Well,” Oliver whispered, “If it makes you feel any better...all I felt was disgust, too.”

Felicity stared back at him, guilt creeping in as she read the dejected look on his face. And she could see that he was embarrassed by the whole thing.

“It was one second, Felicity. One second where yes, Laurel probably had an idea in her head. And yes, she was drunk. And yes, I should have stopped her. But I would have never betrayed your trust. I was just...I was feeling incredibly insecure.”

“Insecure?” Felicity gaped, utterly confused by the confession. Insecure had never been a word that she associated with Oliver Queen.

“Yes,” he sighed. “I’ve made some terrible choices, and Laurel was an awful reminder of that. And you...when I saw you dancing with Ray at the party, I couldn’t help but think that you deserve a man like him. Someone who makes you happy. Someone who you never have to worry about whether or not he’s cheating on you or lying to you. And I knew that I couldn’t make that kind of a promise. How could I? When I’ve never even had a relationship that I remained faithful to.”

“Oliver…”

“That’s what was going through my head. I was...disgusted with myself, Felicity. And that moment with Laurel was just fueling the fire. She touched me, and it brought all of those awful feelings back, and my first thought was just...maybe this is all I deserve. But then when you were leaving, I saw your face...and I knew you were disgusted with me, too.”

“Hey,” she shook her head. “I was just pissed at you because it… This whole plan was supposed to be some silly game of commitment that you and I were playing. And I hated how it felt when I saw you with her and I thought... it just hurt, Oliver. It hurt for real.”

He nodded slowly, his eyes focused on hers while he whispered back, “I don’t ever want to make you feel that way.”

“I know,” Felicity sighed. “I could tell you that I'm just upset because...you deserve better than her.” She let out another breath, her skin heating as she finally admitted a truth that she had been holding on to for years. “But that would be a lie. The truth is, I don’t like seeing you with other women, Oliver. Not just Laurel. Anyone.” Holding her chin high, she mustered up some courage and gave him a confession of her own. “I might have been a little jealous.”

Oliver raised his eyebrow, hesitating for a moment in surprise before he repeated, “Jealous? You? Of Laurel?”

“Yes…”

She expected him to be angry, since the reality was that she had no real claim on him. And no real right to be jealous.

Instead, Oliver just looked bewildered.

After a moment of tense silence, he mumbled back, “At the wedding, when I asked you to do this…you seemed so smug. You thought that I wouldn’t agree to your terms if I couldn’t have sex. You didn’t even realize that for me, the problem was that you said we couldn’t have sex. I told you that ever since we slept together, I couldn’t imagine being with anyone else—”

“Right,” Felicity cut him off, “but that's just sex, Oliver. I’m not just talking about that anymore. I mean, lines are blurring. At least for me they are...”

He shook his head, “I know they are, Felicity. But I'd be lying if I said I didn't want them to. I see now that even when I suggested the experiment, a part of me wanted to mess things up. You've always had these clear rules about us. Boundaries. And I think that I just wanted you to see...we don't need them. Now that you’ve been my fake girlfriend for the past three weeks...I want it to be real.”

“What?”

“No more games, Felicity…” Oliver sighed. “I want it to be real.”

Chapter Text

He left the words hanging in the air between them. Ringing in her ears. Spreading through her heart. And it felt an awful lot like hope.

I want it to be real.

“What do you mean you want it to be real?” Felicity breathed.

Oliver sat up in the bed, pulling her with him. Then he took her face between his hands, looking into her eyes. He made sure that she was listening. “I want this, Felicity. I want you. I’m not going to pretend that I’m not scared shitless right now just saying this, but…” he sighed, his thumbs gently grazing over her cheeks. “I love you. Not platonically. Not as a friend. And not because it’s going to be easy. I love you.”

All she could do was stare at him. She knew she looked like a deer caught in the headlights. She knew she needed to take a breath. Say something. But all she could do was stare. And pray that she wasn’t dreaming.

Oliver’s eyes softened as he continued to caress her face, his fingers winding into her hair. “Felicity?” he whispered, his voice shaking.

“Say it again,” she heard her own voice answer.

There was no way she misheard him. No way to misinterpret his meaning or tell herself that she was reading too much into it. For once, Oliver was being very direct. And her heart felt like it would soar right out of her chest at any moment, but she cautiously kept it grounded, part of her too afraid to believe the words he'd just spoken.

Oliver let out a breathless chuckle before growling back, “I fucking love you, Felicity Smoak. Do you understand?”

Felicity nodded once in response. And then she was suddenly rising onto her knees until her lips met his. He kissed her back instantly, urging her to wrap her arms around his shoulders, open her mouth, and deepen it. Just as her teeth tugged at his bottom lip, Oliver sucked in a sharp breath, and Felicity smiled before whispering back, “I fucking love you, too.”

He cursed under his breath, something low and unintelligible. As he kissed her again, Oliver lifted Felicity up, turning her over and depositing her onto the bed. Her back landed against the mattress in one moment and his body was on top of hers in the next.

Words kept flowing from his lips as he kissed her mouth, her cheek, her ear, her neck. 

“You’re perfect, Felicity. You’re perfect for me.”

“I want this so much. God, I want you.”

“You mean everything to me.”

Oliver’s words were turning her heart into a wild mess. And his mouth was causing the same effect on her body. He made his way down to her chest, laying two wet kisses to the tops of each of her breasts. And then as he moved lower, Felicity’s back arched, desperate for more. Still, Oliver drew a slow trail across her stomach, the cool air making her skin tingle in the wake of each kiss.

When he finally reached her underwear, he paused. And Felicity couldn’t help herself. She lifted her hips off the bed, her core grinding against his chin. Oliver simply picked his head up and smirked at her. 

Felicity whimpered, raising her hips again in search of the slight friction his stubbled chin offered.

“We’ve done enough avoiding and assuming, Felicity,” Oliver mumbled, his eyes on her face. “Tell me.”

She frowned, not understanding. His mouth was too close to where she wanted him to focus on what he was trying to say. Felicity ran her fingers through his hair, opening her legs wider and guiding his lips closer.

“Talk to me, Felicity,” he whispered, pressing a soft kiss to each of her inner thighs before he looked back up at her. “Tell me what you want. Say the words.”

Felicity groaned, “I want you to kiss me.”

In response, Oliver smiled. He lifted his head and then started to crawl back up her body as if to reach her mouth again. “I’ll kiss you anytime you want me to.”

Felicity grinned back at him, locking her legs around his waist to keep him just where he was. “I meant down there.”

Oliver raised an eyebrow, dropping his head to her stomach. She felt his tongue slip out, gliding around her navel and making her whole body shiver. “Here?” he asked.

“Lower…”

His teeth scraped across her hip bone as he mumbled into her skin, “Here?”

Finally, with a frustrated huff, Felicity leaned up onto her elbows and glared down at him. “I want your mouth between my legs. I want your tongue inside of me. And I want you to make me come so hard that I forget my name.”

Oliver’s eyes widened. And then he quickly pulled her underwear to the side and gave her everything she wanted.

Of course, it was only the beginning.

Something between them was different.

Felicity knew it the moment he’d kissed her. The feeling in her chest grew when he finally filled her, when their bodies moved together in a way they never had before. And as he brought her over the edge of pleasure yet again, holding her tight even as he joined her in it, that feeling became impossible to ignore.

She fell against his chest, her body spent.

Burying her face in his neck, Felicity tried to catch her breath, coming back to herself. Their chests were covered in a thin sheen of shared sweat, rising and falling, in tune with the other. Oliver’s hands moved off of her waist, trailing up her spine as his cock softened inside of her. “Felicity?” he whispered against her ear, “Are you okay?”

Slowly, she picked her head up, kissing a path across his jaw. Felicity smiled as she rubbed her nose against his. “I’m perfect,” she answered, soothingly running her hands through his hair. “That was...perfect.” 

Then she lifted her hips, each of them groaning when he slid out of her. With her legs beginning to feel numb, Felicity shifted off of him, taking the sheet with her as she rolled onto her back and settled beside him with a huff.

Oliver merely turned onto his side, reaching for her waist again as he propped himself onto an elbow and looked down at her. “It was,” he grinned. “We—well, we’ve...it’s felt like that before. At least for me it has. It always does. Of course,  there was something special between you and me since we met. But after we slept together?” He blew out a breath, shaking his head in disbelief. “God, Felicity, it’s...it’s like—like this energy between us, you know? I mean, I realize now what it is, but fuck...I’ve felt that way long before we had sex for the first time.”

Felicity raised an eyebrow, “Love, you mean?”

“Hell yeah,” Oliver chuckled. “Tommy told me that when he found out we’d slept together, he thought we’d moved on. Like he thought it was just sexual tension with us, and once we gave into it, it would be out of our systems or something.”

Rolling her eyes, Felicity reached up to touch his face, her thumb caressing his bottom lip in the same spot that she loved to nibble on. “Well, Tommy is usually wrong about...pretty much everything.”

He laughed, taking her hand and bringing it to his lips so he could kiss her thumb, then her palm, then her wrist. He hummed as his mouth continued up her arm. “I knew that wasn’t going to be the case,” Oliver mumbled into her skin. “I had an unsettling suspicion that sleeping with you would only make my feelings stronger.”

Felicity furrowed her eyebrows, pouting at him as she asked, “Unsettling?”

“Yes,” Oliver replied. “Falling in love with my best friend who I never thought would want to take a chance on me was quite unsettling.”

“You thought I wouldn’t want to take a chance on you?” 

“You forget that I’m not much smarter than Tommy.”

Felicity scoffed, “Please. I was already in love with you, too.”

He smiled; a bright, wholesome one that made his dimples appear. “I like hearing you say that.”

Taking her time, Felicity leaned in and kissed the corner of his mouth, then his lips, waiting until the moment he tried to deepen it to whisper, “I love you.”

Oliver paused for a brief moment, but then she felt him smile. “I love you, too. A lot.”

“Good,” Felicity giggled. “No more worrying, okay? Let’s just give this our best, honest shot.”

Of course, by this…she meant a real relationship. Which was the exact thing that both of them have always avoided, feared, and pushed away.

Yet somehow, Felicity didn’t feel nervous. She was sure that in time, doubts would probably come. Things would get hard. They’d definitely fight. But for once, the idea of going through all of that didn’t make her want to run for the hills. There would be challenges and obstacles that neither of them had ever experienced, given their track records for quitting when things got too complicated.

And yet, she was excited to have those experiences. She was excited to work through those bad days and come out stronger with the man she loved. She was excited to love Oliver Queen and be loved by him in return. 

“I’m in this with you,” Felicity whispered, staring up at him as the emotion of everything swirled through her brain.

He must have seen it on her face. His arms tightened around her, his eyes searching hers. “I’m not going anywhere, baby,” he whispered, ducking his head to kiss the tip of her nose. “Well,” he cocked his head, “There is actually somewhere I want to go.”

Before she could even think about stopping him, Oliver shifted away and stood up. 

“Hey,” Felicity frowned. “Where?”

“It sounds like the storm has passed,” Oliver answered as he searched for his underwear. “And we still have a list to finish.”

He pulled his clothes on while Felicity blinked back at him, “The list? “I think the list has served its purpose,” she snorted. “We wanted to know what it was like to date exclusively. We tried it. Now we’re doing it for real.” She scrunched up her nose, “So how about you just come back to bed?”

Oliver turned around, looking a little offended as he said, “Have some respect for the list, Felicity.” Then he winked and tossed her the clothes he’d peeled off of her and thrown to the floor just a couple of hours ago. “And get dressed.”

Felicity huffed, but pulled her shirt over her head. “What’s even left on it, anyway?”

“Something that will be much better out here than it would be in Starling.”

When she was finally ready, Oliver grabbed a towel from the bathroom and then he laced his fingers through hers, pulling her out of the motel room. Felicity followed, holding in her question until he led her outside and started walking towards his car in the parking lot. “Where are we going?” she asked again, sounding much more whiny this time.

It was cold. Rain was still dripping from the eave of the motel and the surrounding trees. And she wasn’t even wearing a bra. “Oliver, come on! Do we really need a list to make us spend time together? I was perfectly fine cuddling in that cheap motel bed. Where it’s warm. And dry. And my shirt isn’t see-through.”

He smirked over his shoulder, his gaze dropping to her breasts, where she knew her nipples were reacting to the cold air. “Oliver!” she scoffed, yanking her hand out of his in favor of crossing her arms over her chest.

Oliver just laughed as they reached the car. “Don’t worry, we’re not going far.”

He used the towel to wipe down the hood of his car, clearing off the rain and pine needles. Then he threw the towel on top of the car, and scooted himself up onto the hood. Oliver held his hands out to Felicity from where he sat. “What are we doing?” she asked.

In response, Oliver wiggled his fingers, beckoning her closer as he rolled his eyes. “Would you please just trust me, okay? Trust me and trust the list, and get your fine ass up here.”

Well, that was a request she couldn’t refuse.

Felicity slipped her hands through his, letting him haul her up onto the hood of his car. She sat down beside him, the cool surface only bothering her for a moment before Oliver’s arms were around her. “Now,” he mumbled, holding her flush against his chest as he eased them back to lie down. 

On instinct, she nestled her face into the crook of his neck, her eyes slipping shut.

Oliver pressed a kiss to the shell of her ear and whispered, “Look up.”

When she did, Felicity was met with one of the most amazing things she’d ever seen. The sky was bright and full of stars. Possibly more stars than she’d ever seen. The city lights of Vegas had a tendency to dim the stars, and the clouds that usually hung over Starling made the view of the sky rather unimpressive most nights.

But even still...she’d never seen the stars like this before.

There were thousands of them, and they were all so bright, almost as if they were hanging right above their heads. “I’ve never seen anything like this,” Felicity eventually whispered.

Gently smoothing his fingers up and down her arm, Oliver hummed. “You wanted to see the stars, Miss Smoak…”

“And you continue to exceed my every expectation, Mr. Queen.”

Oliver smiled at that, but shook his head. “Unfortunately, I can’t exactly take credit for putting the stars in the sky.”

“No,” she breathed out a laugh, feeling herself falling even deeper in love. “But you can take credit for this moment.” And god, was it a moment. Her head on his chest. His hand combing through her hair. Laying there on the hood of his car while they admired the stars. 

It was a moment that she knew she would always remember.

And she had Oliver to thank for that.

After a few minutes of comfortable silence, Oliver pointed up at the sky and tried to show her the big dipper. When she failed to see it, he tried to point out the little dipper right beside it. Felicity still had no idea what he was looking at, despite Oliver’s best efforts to help her see them and Felicity’s frustration that she couldn't. “I think you’re making this up!” she eventually accused, poking a finger into his chest.

“Am not!” Oliver clicked his tongue before turning his attention back to the sky. “I know my constellations, Felicity. See?” He shot his hand into the air again, “There’s Orion.” Then he paused, his expression focused as he studied the stars for a moment. “And there,” he pointed in the opposite direction, “Ursa Major, and Lyra, and Aquila.”

Felicity sat up, squinting her eyes at the spot he was trying to indicate. “I don’t see anything!” she bellowed. When she glanced down at Oliver again, he was grinning ear to ear, and Felicity knew the look perfectly. “You are messing with me!”

He caught her finger as she went to jab it into his chest again, twisting his fingers through hers and pulling her back down to lie on top of him. “Okay, okay,” he laughed, “I do see the big dipper and the little dipper, but I have no idea about those constellations. That part I made up.”

Felicity rolled her eyes, “I should have known, yet mostly I’m just impressed that you know the names of three of them.”

Oliver squeezed her close. “I know more than that!” He defended himself. “There’s also...scorpius, and capricornus, and ophiuchus, and centaurus.”

“Wow,” Felicity grinned as she pinched his side, “I didn’t know my boyfriend was such a little astronomy nerd. It’s kind of sexy.”

“Oh yeah? Just wait ‘til I tell you about the galaxies.” He smirked back, and Felicity giggled. “Telescope for my tenth birthday,” Oliver explained, his cheeks turning pink. “I got pretty into it.”

She shook her head in amusement, “You’re adorable.”

That seemed to make him blush even more. Oliver cupped her chin and leaned in for a kiss, which Felicity was more than happy to participate in, but before their lips met, she noticed something flicker out of the corner of her eye. She gasped, quickly looking up just in time to see one of the bright lights above fall through the sky. Felicity blinked for a moment before realizing what she’d seen. And it never occurred to her that she’d never seen one before. 

“Shooting star!” Felicity yelped. “Oliver! Shooting star!” She pulled away from him, perking up straight as she stared up at the sky, searching for another one. “Did you see it!?”

“No,” he chuckled, brushing her hair out of her face so he could kiss her cheek.

She gently tapped her hand on his thigh, “Wait, wait, wait,” she breathed. “I bet we’ll see another one.”

Oliver ducked his head, trying to hide his laughter as his mouth grazed her shoulder. And then he focused on the stars above. It didn’t take long for another one to come shooting across the sky, and Felicity got just as excited as the first time. “Oh! You saw that one, right!?”

“Yes,” he nodded. “I did. And you’re adorable.”

Felicity couldn’t help but sit there watching the sky like a wide-eyed child, waiting for another shooting star.

After seeing a few more of them, the excitement eventually wore off. Oliver laughed as she placed her head on his shoulder and sighed happily. 

They sat in the comfort of the silence and the wonder of the stars. She could have sat there until the sun came up without complaint, but her stomach didn’t agree with her.

Oliver kissed her forehead when her stomach growled, ruining the mood. “It's getting late. You should go to the room. I’ll head back into Coast City and pick us up some dinner.”

Felicity rested her chin on his shoulder, looking up at his profile in the moonlight.

God, he really was gorgeous.

And it seemed silly, but after sorting through the majority of their bullshit and finally getting together for real, the idea of even spending ten minutes away from him felt like too much. “Are you sure?” she asked, “I can go with you.”

“No, it’s okay,” Oliver kissed her head again before pulling out the room key and handing it over. “You go relax, I’ll just grab a pizza or something and be right back.”

“Okay,” she sighed, not wanting to argue it when he was just trying to be a gentleman. Felicity cupped his cheek, drawing him in until their lips met. She kissed him slowly, savoring the moment. “Hurry back,” she practically purred the words, feeling Oliver shiver in response.

His eyes were still closed as he swallowed, his face lingering close to hers for another moment. Felicity chuckled and patted his cheek.

Then he got into the car and started it, waiting until she made it across the parking lot and got inside the room before he started to drive off. Felicity waved as he left, then she quickly shut the door. 

She didn’t really like the quietness of the place anymore. Now that she was alone, it actually gave her the creeps. Felicity was pretty sure that Tara at the front desk and the ‘owner’ she’d mentioned were the only other people at the motel. They hadn’t seen any other cars, at least. And she hadn’t seen either of them in the hours since they arrived. Was that weird? Or were she and Oliver just in their own world, happy to be left alone? And why the hell didn’t she insist on going back to town with him again?

Needing a distraction, Felicity turned the television back on, the screen lighting up to whatever sports station Oliver had been watching.

Apparently, there were only a handful of channels that came in, and the rest were static. Felicity skipped past the soccer game in search of something more her speed, stopping when a black and white film caught her attention.

“Psycho,” she mumbled to herself. “How fitting.”

She was already anxious about the creepy motel she was currently alone in. She also hated scary movies in general, and yet she couldn’t look away.

Rather than finding something more relaxing to watch, Felicity sat on the edge of the bed with the remote gripped in her hand as Norman Bates terrorized his victims. More than once, she told herself to switch the station, but her eyes remained glued to the screen, reconciling that she’d change it in just another minute.

That didn’t happen either. And when Oliver unexpectedly swung the door open and walked into the room, Felicity nearly jumped right out of her skin.

He gave her a disconcerted look as he froze in the doorway, a pizza box in his hands. Then his eyes shifted to the screen, and he sighed. Oliver set the pizza on the dresser, shaking his head when he looked at Felicity again. “You hate scary movies. Why the hell are you watching Psycho alone in this sketchy motel?”

Felicity groaned, wiggling her fingers out for him to come closer. Oliver chuckled, shaking his head again as he grabbed the pizza box and sat down beside her. He placed the food on the other side of Felicity, then he wrapped her up in his arms and hugged her tight. She waited until he was settled before answering, “Because the only other thing I could find to watch was a soccer game. And this is much more entertaining. Although terrifying.”

Oliver kissed her cheek, “Felicity, it’s a great movie. But it should hardly scare you. I mean, it’s in black and white and you’ve probably seen better effects on the Disney Channel.”

She nudged her shoulder against his chest, keeping her eyes on the movie. “I think loving boyfriends are supposed to say ‘don’t worry, baby. I’ll protect you’ or something like that.”

“Noooo,” Oliver huffed, “that’s what the loving boyfriends always say in scary movies right before they get hacked into little pieces.”

“Oliver!” she shoved him a little harder this time, but he just laughed even more.

Then he pulled her close again, bowing his head to whisper in her ear, “Don’t worry, baby. I’ll protect you.”

“Yeah, that has lost its sweetness now that I’m worried we’ll be hacked into little pieces.”

Oliver shrugged, “I won’t let anyone hack you into little pieces.”

“Wow,” Felicity put a hand over her chest, “that’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever said to me.”

Rolling his eyes, Oliver grabbed her waist and tickled her, “Oh, it’s sweet you want?”

Felicity flailed against his chest, trying to get away as her laughter filled the room. “Oliver, Oliver stop!” she gasped out the words as she struggled to catch her breath.

Finally, he showed mercy and let her go.

But as soon as he did, Felicity swung her leg over his lap and climbed over him. She pushed him down onto the bed, her nails digging into his chest. “If you were ticklish, I’d so be getting you back right now.”

He stared up at her with a smirk, “Can’t think of any other forms of payback, hm?”

Raising an eyebrow, Felicity hovered over him, her hair creating a curtain over their faces. Without a word, she slowly ran her lips over his ear, up to his cheek, across his temple. But she didn’t kiss him. When she reached his mouth, her lips ghosted across his, and Oliver surged off the bed to reach her, but Felicity leaned back before he could make contact.

And then she found each of his wrists and lifted them above his head, pinning his hands to the mattress. “I suppose I could come up with something,” she murmured softly.

From the television behind them, a loud scream echoed in the room, making them both turn to look at the television. 

“Yeah,” Oliver groaned as he reached for the remote. “Definitely time to turn this off.” Once the room was silent again, he tossed the remote onto the nightstand and smiled shyly at Felicity. “We should eat before it gets cold.”

After such a long day with barely anything in her stomach, she was way too hungry to argue with that. On the backburner of her mind, she was still incredibly curious to know what else Oliver might allow her to do. Where she could take things if she had him on his back with his hands restrained above his head. She had a feeling he’d pretty much let her do anything she wanted. 

And Felicity found herself eating faster than she usually did, partly because she was so hungry but mostly because she had an itch to make love to Oliver again. To feel it.

She finished two slices of pizza, unable to recall what was on it but she knew it was good, at least. Then she tossed the box aside and turned to watch Oliver as he ate his third. His eyes flickered down to her from where he sat on the edge of the bed, glancing at her with this strange, confused, self-conscious look on his face. “What?” he asked around a bite.

Felicity just grinned, shaking her head while her eyes fell to his hands.

He had big hands. And broad shoulders. Strong arms. Those veins that ran up his forearms, twining through thick muscles and tan skin. She reached out and touched him there, sighing as she tipped his hand over and gently placed her palm against his. 

It amazed her that she could just reach out and touch him like this now. That she could just... have him. Whenever she wanted. 

No more pining. No more suppressing it. No more hiding.

Running her fingers over his bicep and up to his shoulder, Felicity could feel Oliver’s eyes on her. She slid her fingers over his chest, dipping her hand beneath his shirt just to feel his heated skin and his heart beating beneath it. Her other hand moved up to his hair, a small smile crossing her face as she realized how much she would love being able to reach over and trace her fingers through it. Any time. Anywhere. Because he was her boyfriend.

He’d finished eating at some point, but he didn’t make a single noise until she decided to lean in and let her lips do the honors of exploring his neck.

“Fe-li-ci-ty,” he choked out.

Amazingly...for the rest of the night, her name, along with strangled moans and hurried curses, was the extent of their conversation.

Yet as their bodies did all the talking, Felicity never missed a single thing that he was trying to tell her. Their feelings for each other were shifting, deepening, and it was as if she could feel it happening. She'd never thrown herself into anything without carefully weighing all of the potential risks, but for Oliver, she jumped headfirst as soon as he admitted that he wanted things between them to be real. 

The feeling was addicting.

They came together again and again until they were both exhausted.

And unconditionally lost in each other.

Chapter Text

This woman was going to be the death of him. The actual death. He’d cared about her for such a long time, probably loved her for the majority of that time without even realizing it. Something about their friendship was always more , of course...but there was still that tiny piece of him that worried. 

Worried they’d never be more than friends.

Worried they wouldn’t last.

Worried that it wouldn’t be all that he envisioned it to be. 

Worried that if and when he finally found the courage to kiss her, they wouldn’t feel any sparks. And then he’d have jeopardized their friendship for nothing.

He felt so stupid now…for fearing such pointless things. 

Oliver had kissed her for the first time months ago, and he could still feel those same sparks now just by looking at her. Just by anticipating it. Just because...now he knew what it felt like.

The first time it happened, Nyssa and Sara had taken them out to dinner and asked them both to be a part of their upcoming wedding. Their friends eventually left the bar, but he and Felicity had lingered to share a few drinks and continue talking. 

And it was a combination of everything.

The drinks. Their friendship. The chemistry they had. But the air was especially charged that night because of the wedding and how happy Sara and Nyssa were. He couldn’t help but wonder if a love like that wouldn’t be so bad. If it would be worth it. He’d never been able to picture himself in a committed relationship, but somehow being with Felicity that night, everything seemed so simple.

He’d ended up kissing her on the sidewalk outside of the bar while they waited for a cab.

At first, Felicity had kissed him back. But then she pulled away and made some joke about how it was a miracle that in all the years they’d been friends, they hadn’t done that yet. Then she’d smiled up at him, gently caressing his cheek as she said, “That was nice, Oliver...but it shouldn’t happen again.”

His body was ready to argue with that statement. Argue all night, if they needed to.

But his head was much more concerned with the consequences of it.

So he had nodded in agreement at the time. She’d gone home alone and so had he. Yet, for the week that followed, that kiss was all he could think about. He couldn’t shake the feeling that they’d cut the moment too short. And it wasn’t long until he’d built up the courage to try it again.

That time...had ended with both of them naked on her living room floor, making up for the years they’d spent denying themselves the pleasure.

And then it just...kept happening.

He kept coming up with innocent reasons to invite her over that would end in much less innocent positions.

She kept finding thin excuses to call and ask him to her place, too.

The idea that at any point during those months, he could have just confessed his feelings and avoided all of the bullshit made him feel like an idiot. He could have been with her that much sooner. 

But at the same time, then they probably wouldn’t have ended up on that beach-trip-turned-Motel-sex-marathon. And then maybe he wouldn’t be watching her the next morning; her hair a wild mess, half of her face burrowed into the crook of his arm, her mouth open as she whispered something in her sleep. 

This was certainly worth the wait.

Carefully leaning in, Oliver kissed the corner of her mouth, slowly ghosting his lips across her cheek and up to her temple. “Felicity…” he whispered. “Time to wake up, baby.”

Part of him felt bad, considering how little sleep they’d gotten the night before. But he just couldn’t get enough.

It was an intoxicating feeling to look into her eyes knowing that she was his. All-consuming to think that the best woman he’s ever known was his . 

How could he ever possibly have enough of her when he wanted all of her?

Every inch of her skin. Every smile. Every fight. Every day.

Felicity groaned something unintelligible when he began to pepper her face in kisses, gently pulling on her shoulder to get her to roll onto her back. She finally did, her eyebrows furrowing, but she still didn’t look at him.

“If you open your eyes,” Oliver murmured. “I’ll make it worth your while.”

She grinned, but still, her eyes remained closed as she answered, “You can make it worth my while either way. I believe in you.”

Oliver let out a growl, shifting on the bed to hover over her. Then he reached down and lightly trailed his fingers up her leg, pushing between her thighs. 

“Oh,” she sighed, finally looking at him. “No, no, no.” Felicity shook her head, her eyes wide and tired as they met his. “Oliver, I think you’ve exhausted every muscle in my body. I’m jello.” 

He moved on top of her, holding most of his weight on his elbows as he covered her body with his own. Oliver gently stroked his fingers against her scalp, smoothing her hair away from her face. “I don’t think I’ve exhausted every muscle… and you’re not jello.”

“I am,” she sighed as she wrapped her arms around his neck and closed her eyes again, spreading her legs to accommodate him. “I’m jello and I’m tired and I’m hungry and I want to brush my teeth.”

Oliver chuckled, “All right...we can head home. After we finish the last thing on our list.” He smirked down at her as she took a moment to think about it, clearly trying to remember what they hadn’t done yet.

Once it came to her, Felicity narrowed her eyes. “The list says sun set on the beach. Not sun rise. ”

“I think we can allow ourselves a little bit of improvising, don’t you?”

“It’s way too early for me to be awake right now, Oliver. Especially after what we did last night. All night.”

He winked, “I know. Sunrise. Breakfast. Home. Showers. Sleep. More sex. In that order.” As Felicity continued to watch him skeptically, Oliver gave her his best puppy dog eyes, “Please?”

“Fine,” she groaned before nudging him to get off. “But you know this was only supposed to be a day trip, right?” 

“Hey,” he stretched out on the bed beside her, “I have no complaints about how this trip turned out.”

Oliver watched as she bit her lip, a slight blush coloring her cheeks. 

“Neither do I,” Felicity whispered back.

After they packed up their things and left the motel without a word, his girlfriend insisted on stopping for caffeine. But even after finishing her cup and most of his, Felicity was still pretty grumpy.

They found a nice bench spot on the pier that overlooked the horizon, and she sat beside him quietly to enjoy the sunrise. There were only a few other people in sight, which made the beach feel much more relaxing compared to yesterday’s crowds. A couple walking hand in hand in the distance. Two men fishing from the edge of the pier. And a group of five or six surfers out on the water, taking advantage of the accelerated waves left in the wake of the storm.

Oliver and Felicity didn’t speak a word, each of them content to watch the people and the rising sun as they sipped their coffee. He kept his arm around her the whole time, his thumb absently rubbing her shoulder.

As he enjoyed the moment with Felicity, he was amazed at how nice it was. No one else could steady him like this. Calm him. Make him want to sit still and savor the simple pleasure of a sunrise. No one but her.

When the sun had inched above the water and the sky was a gorgeous mix of blues and oranges, Oliver finally spoke. “You know,” he murmured fondly, drawing Felicity closer. “Just because I don’t think I actually said it today...I love you.”

Felicity pulled her eyes away from the sunrise to look up at him. And she smiled, “I know. God...you’ve practically been screaming it all morning.”

Raising an eyebrow, he couldn’t help but return the smile. “You want me to scream it? I can scream it.” 

Her face fell when Oliver suddenly stood up. He cleared his throat, stepping up to the railing of the pier, and Felicity yanked on his arm with a quiet, “Oliver, don’t!” hissed between her teeth.

But he ignored her.

Cupping his hands over his mouth, Oliver shouted, “Hey everyone!” He paused as the fishermen across the pier each jumped in surprise and the couple down on the beach turned to look at him. “I’m in love with this woman!”

“Oh my god,” Felicity panted, covering her face with her hands.

He was pretty sure he hadn’t seen her this embarrassed since they were in college and he’d accidentally walked in on her while she was changing. That was probably the last time he’d seen her cheeks get this red. It just made his smile widen. 

“Good for you, man!” one of the surfers shouted back from the water.

Oliver waved back, “Thanks!”

“Oh my god,” his girlfriend quickly grabbed his hand and pulled it down, dragging him back onto the bench beside her. “Are you insane?” she laughed in disbelief. “No, I’m serious, are you okay? Have you lost your mind?”

With a shrug, he took her hand, bringing her fingers to his lips as he muttered against her skin, “Strong possibility.”

“We need to go home. Now. Where you can return to the Oliver Queen that I know.”

“I don’t think I can ever go back now, Felicity,” he chuckled, kissing her knuckles one more time. “I understand now... I’ll never know what’s going to happen next. All I know is that I need you.” 

In her silence, Oliver glanced up, his heart sinking with the sudden dread that he’d scared her. But Felicity was watching him with a look in her eyes that he knew well.

“It sort of feels like…” he huffed out a breath as he searched for the right words. “Well, it’s kind of like you watching scary movies. You’re afraid, but you sit there and watch them anyway because you need to know. And maybe part of you likes being afraid, even if you have to close your eyes through some parts of it, you know?”

“Oliver,” she fought a smile, “You really have lost your mind here.”

He let out a sharp breath, determined to explain himself. “I’m saying that ever since I met you, I was afraid . Of how you make me feel. Of everything I could imagine having with you. Things I swore to myself I didn’t want. So I closed my eyes. I tried to ignore it. And all I ended up doing was wasting time that I could have been with you. But I’m not afraid anymore. I’m not afraid to love you, or for you to love me. In fact, I’m ashamed that I ever was...because I love you with everything that I have, Felicity.”

Her lips twitched with a smile, but he could see a hint of sadness in her eyes that made his stomach turn. “You know…” she sighed, “Ever since I was a kid, I believed that everyone would eventually leave me. Especially the men in my life. It’s no shocker that good old dad taught me that lesson. But you came along,” she let out a breathless chuckle as she continued, “And you kept coming. I think at some point, I got it in my head that as long as we stayed just friends, you would stay. So I kept all these boundaries when it came to you. I never wanted to let you all the way in, but you slowly chipped away at every wall I put up around myself, until one day I realized that...you know me better than anyone. And I like that.”

“I like that, too,” he whispered back. 

Felicity laughed again, easing his nerves. “I’ve...I’ve become a different person since I met you, Oliver. And I—I don’t just mean when I’m around you. I’m...more open , I think. I’ve never really been one to make friends very easily, and yet my life is surrounded by so many good people. I’m closer to my mom now than we ever were before. I have a job that I love, and I’m confident in myself that I’m good at it.”

“Don’t get me wrong,” Felicity held up her hands, “I’m not saying that you turned me from pumpkin to Cinderella or anything crazy like that, but…you bring out the best in me.”

She said it as if it was a simple fact, shrugging her shoulders. Yet Oliver felt his heart soar in his chest. “Felicity,” he mumbled, feeling a little breathless, as if she’d knocked the wind out of him with those words. 

You bring out the best in me.  

“I think that as long as we can look at each other and trust that that is still true, you and I are going to be just fine.” 

Felicity nodded in agreement, her eyes locked with his. “Well, there is one more piece of baggage that I need to unload before we can ride off into the sunrise.”

“What’s that?” Oliver frowned.

She reached into her bag that sat on the bench beside her, searching through it until she found her purse, and then she searched through that too, until she eventually turned back to him with a letter in hand. “The biological burden of my ‘damaged goods’ reputation.”

Oliver glanced at the letter, recognizing it as the one from her father that she’d received over three weeks ago. The one she hadn’t been ready to open that night, but promised she’d tell him when she was. After a few days had passed without her mentioning it, he thought she might have tossed it in a drawer and forgotten about it. It surprised him that she was carrying it around, but Oliver tightened his arm around her shoulders, ready and willing to be the support system she needed.

Felicity nodded once, a silent understanding passing between them. Then she opened the envelope and took out the letter, leaning into his chest as she began to read it. And Oliver did his best not to stare at her face the entire time, wanting to give her some semblance of privacy. But it was hard not to watch her when he started to hear her quietly sniffle and noticed a few tears on her cheek.

When she was finished reading, Felicity folded the pages and handed them over to him. Oliver glanced from them to her, realizing that she wanted him to read it, too. “Are you sure?” he asked, more concerned with the tears on her face than the contents of the letter. She nodded as she wiped the moisture from her cheeks.

Taking a breath to prepare himself, Oliver took the papers, holding them in one hand and keeping the other anchored on Felicity’s knee.

Noah Kuttler’s words were full of apologies and sweet sentiments. He wrote about his memories of Felicity’s childhood, and how he’d been keeping up with her career from Iron Heights and he was proud of her work at Palmer Tech, telling her that he had always known she was destined for greatness. He ended the letter by telling her that he often dreamed about seeing her face to face again, and he would really like it if she came to visit him someday.

Oliver looked up at his girlfriend once he finished the letter, and she smiled. But it was the kind that he knew she was faking. He shook his head, “You don’t have to go there. You don’t owe him anything, Felicity.”

“I know,” she nodded, rubbing her hand over the top of his. “Maybe someday I’ll want to talk to him about everything that happened, but I have no desire to bring him back into my life right now.” She shook her head, her next smile more forced than the last one. 

“Felicity…”

“It’s just funny, you know?” She waved her hand around her head, gesturing at her appearance. “We finally figured out our issues. Solve one problem, and a new one pops up.”

Oliver offered a small smile, reaching up to brush his thumb across her cheek, “I suppose that’s just life, honey. But your father isn’t baggage, and you are certainly not ‘damaged goods.’ You promised me that when you were ready to read this letter, you would let me be there for you. Now all I can do is ask you that if a day ever comes when you feel like you want to visit him, you’ll let me be there for you through that, too.”

“I’ll always want it to be you,” she answered softly.

He nodded, in full agreement, because he knew that he would never stop feeling the same way about her. “I want you to know that no matter what experiences you go through, I’m glad you did. They shaped the person you are. And you know how I feel about her.”

Finally, the smile that pulled at her lips was genuine.

“I love you, too,” Felicity whispered back. “But now that you’ve told everyone on this beach that you love me, I think it’s time to go.”

Oliver chuckled, “Agreed. I’m starving.”

After leaving the beach, they found a nearby diner that had large windows and a view of the water. Oliver ordered almost everything on the menu for them to share, including a cinnamon roll the size of Felicity’s head. And more coffee, of course.

They ate slowly, taking their time with it just as they’d been taking their time with everything since they left Starling. 

Once she’d had some food and two more cups of coffee, Felicity seemed to be in a better mood. Her eyes were still a little red and puffy, but she was more talkative, tossing him a shy smile every time she reached across the table to take something off of his plate.

He smiled back every time, finding amusement just to watch her. Openly. Without having to avert his gaze and pretend he wasn’t admiring how beautiful she was.

Felicity eventually caught on, though. With her thumb in her mouth, sucking off the excess icing from her cinnamon roll, she narrowed her eyes at him. “What?”

He cocked his head to the side, distracted for a moment by the way her lips were wrapped around her thumb. “Are you ready to go home yet, Felicity?” 

Felicity grinned, instantly catching on to his shift in mood. “Not really,” she whispered back.

“I was hoping you would say that.”

She put her elbows on the table, leaning in closer as she asked, “What did you have in mind?”

“Going back to the motel and spending the rest of the day inside you. Maybe the rest of the night, too. We could always go home tomorrow.”

Pinching her lips together, Felicity slowly nodded. “I’m all for that plan. But we need to make a pit stop.”

Oliver frowned at that, “For what?”

“Clean clothes,” Felicity laughed. “A toothbrush. Basically everything I need in order to stop smelling like an old motel mattress.”

He gave her a short nod in response, turning to look for their waitress to get the check so they could get the hell out of there. Because a quick trip to the store would definitely be necessary, and he would rather get it out of the way now instead of later. 

Once they got back into that motel room, he had no plans of leaving again until they needed to.

Luckily, Felicity was on the same page.

They left the diner and headed back to the main strip where most of the shops were, knowing they’d find a convenient store somewhere along the road. And his girlfriend was impatient; putting her hand on his knee while he drove, scraping her fingers up and down his thigh.

When they finally found a store, it was Oliver’s turn to get impatient. He hurried to grab most of what they’d need, along with a few drinks and snacks that would last them at least until dinner time. But he found Felicity in the aisle with the hair products, debating over which bottle of shampoo she wanted to buy.

He came up behind her, settling a hand on her waist as he reached over her shoulder and took it from her hand. 

“Oliver–” she started, but quickly snapped her lips shut when he pressed himself against her back, dropping his lips to her ear to give her a low, disapproving growl. “Right,” she squeaked, “That one works. I like that kind. We can buy that one.” Oliver nipped at her earlobe in response, and Felicity quickly spun around, yanking on his arm as she pulled him towards the checkout counter. “Okay, let’s go!”

It gave him an obvious sense of deja vu to walk back through the door of the motel, seeing the same dark haired teenager at the front desk as the night before. Once again, the girl’s attention was on her phone, vague disinterest in her eyes as the bell chimed with their entrance and she glanced up.

Then the girl, Tara, smiled. “You two, back again?”

Oliver approached the desk, already pulling out his wallet. “One night. Room nine again if it’s still available.” Tara raised her eyebrows at him, still grinning like she knew exactly what they were up to. Oliver ignored her. “Room nine,” he repeated, leveling her with a no-nonsense glare. “$500?”

Tara shrugged, “I’ll give you a deal for being such a loyal customer. $450.”

Without hesitation, Oliver shoved his credit card in her direction. He felt Felicity’s hand on his back, momentarily calming him until he felt her gently scratch her nails against his flesh, reminding him that he probably still had marks in the same shape of those nails on his back already.

As soon as Tara handed them a key, Oliver spun on his heel, taking Felicity’s beach bag from her shoulder, heavier now they’d stuffed all of their new purchases into it, and swiftly guided her back outside and towards the room they’d shared before.

He could feel the tension between them, possibly stronger than it had ever been. His skin was itching to get her alone, and he could tell by Felicity’s quick steps that she was feeling it too.

The second that they were in the room again, Oliver was dropping the bag on the floor and Felicity was slamming the door shut, and then their hands were all over each other.

He spun her towards the bed, laying her down and crawling on top of her in a matter of seconds. Felicity’s soft noises, whispered words in his ear, telling him to take her clothes off, were almost too much. But Oliver made quick work of the fabric, throwing her shirt and shorts across the room, vaguely hearing it thud on the floor before his attention was back on her. 

Felicity’s fingers pulled at his shirt, yanking it up to his shoulders until he had no choice but to help her get it off. Then she pushed his pants down, just far enough that she could dip her hand inside his boxers to stroke him.

Oliver let out a guttural groan, his hips instinctively thrusting to meet her hand. “Fe-li-ci-ty,” he gritted out her name. “As amazing as that feels—”

“You’re about ready to burst,” she panted against his lips. “Mmm, me too.”

“Fuck,” he huffed, pressing his hand between their bodies, finding her clit and rubbing slow circles over it. He loved the sound of her moaning in his ear, how her head fell back against the pillows, the way her hips rolled in perfect sync with his fingers.

God, he needed to be inside of her.

As if reading his mind, Felicity gripped his cock again, spreading her legs and guiding him home. His entire body froze once he was finally seated inside of her, smacked with the fervent look on her face; her eyes widening as her mouth fell open, and her walls pulsed around him, welcoming him and adjusting to him.

And then, beneath him, Felicity started to move.

She rotated her hips, lifting them off the bed and dropping back down. All the while, she kept her head ducked down, watching as he slowly slid in and out of her.

“Oh, god,” Oliver groaned.

“Don’t stop,” Felicity breathed back, tapping her fingers against the back of his hand that he still had hovering over her clit. “Keep touching me.”

Oliver nodded, sinking his teeth into his bottom lip as he rubbed his fingers over her again, thrusting into her at the speed she set.

“Yes, Oliver, yes...oh my god!” He felt her other hand on his back, dragging down to his ass where she grabbed on with a breathless, “Faster.”

He snapped his hips faster, plunging into her harder. Cupping his head between her hands, Felicity pulled his face down to kiss her, letting him swallow her moans. He swept his tongue into her mouth, feeling his body tighten as the base of his spine began to tingle.

With a loud cry, Felicity pulled back, her hands dropping to his shoulders while her legs moved to hook around his waist. He felt the familiar bite of her nails on his skin, and he couldn’t help himself from spurring her on. “Ohhh, yes, use your nails. Fuck! Just like that.”

Her nails dug into his skin harder, the slight sting on his shoulders mixing with the pleasure that was coursing everywhere else. 

“Oliver!”

He could tell she was close, her body tightening beneath him the way it always did just before she was ready to let go.

Felicity’s legs tightened around his waist, and Oliver buried his head against her chest, biting and sucking at the tops of her breasts as his fingers continued to rub furiously against her clit, his thrusts becoming more sporadic.

“Don’t stop, don’t stop, don’t stop,” she chanted. 

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Oliver growled in response, ramming into her harder just to drive the point home.

Only a moment later, his girlfriend came with a shout, her legs shaking around him. And Oliver continued to pump into her, holding onto to his own control for as long as he could, which was only a few seconds, just to savor how incredible it was to feel her come while he was buried inside her.

It was one of the many feelings that Felicity Smoak could bring him that made everything so clear. She was it for him. 

The one who mattered. The one that he had known, from the moment he met her, would matter to him more than anyone else.

Of course it’s her.

Even if only for this moment of shared bliss, there was nothing in the world that could ever be more important than that.

Chapter Text

“Wow,” Tommy Merlyn sighed as he snapped the box shut, looking up at Oliver with his eyebrows at his hairline. 

Oliver took a sip of his beer, assessing his reaction. He’d been hesitant to accept Tommy’s invitation to grab a few drinks earlier in the day, and he still wasn’t sure if it was the best idea. He had spent the majority of the day with Thea, digging through their mother’s belongings in search of their grandmother’s ring. They’d eventually found it in one of the safes back at their parents mansion, and Oliver had instantly felt a rush of relief.

“You think she’ll like it?” Oliver asked.

“Buddy,” his friend clapped his hand over his shoulder, “I think Felicity would like it even if you bought her a ring made of pebbles.”

Originally, he intended to hold on to the ring for a while longer. Formulate a fool-proof plan. But after seeing the ring, he realized that he wouldn’t be able to wait. He wanted it on Felicity’s finger. It was really a beautiful, unique, and timeless ring. All things that he’d been unable to appreciate when he saw it on his grandmother’s hand while he was growing up. But now, he could see the thing on Felicity. He was sure that she would love it. Confident that it suited her perfectly. And he was realizing that he wasn’t going to be patient enough to wait any longer.

They’d done enough waiting anyway, haven’t they?

He thought he deserved at least some credit for waiting a whole year and a half before he even mentioned marriage. And he’d been delightfully surprised that Felicity didn’t shut him down or laugh in his face. She’d actually been quite open to it. In the last six months, he felt like she had really warmed up to the idea.

Still...he couldn’t be sure that she would say yes this soon.

“I’m just hoping it doesn’t blow up in my face,” he mumbled sarcastically before tossing back the rest of his drink.

In truth, he was glad Tommy had suggested going to the bar. He could use some liquid courage.

“When are you going to ask her?”

“Tonight,” Oliver answered instantly. But he watched Tommy over his glass, still wary. 

“Wow.”

“Yeah,” he sighed. “Unless you want to try to talk me out of it like you tried to talk me out of dating her.”

“Man,” Tommy groaned. “I told you, I was just trying to make sure you knew what you were doing. And of course, sticking my nose where it didn’t belong. You’re never going to let that go, are you?”

Oliver snorted, “Hell no.”

“Well fine. And no, I won’t try to talk you out of it. I’d be smacking you upside the head if you weren’t planning to marry that woman. Although…wait, are you telling me about it now because you want me to talk you out of it?”

Oliver froze, his beer half-way to his mouth. Then he slowly turned to pin Tommy with a harsh glare. “No. Now what I want is to smack you upside the head.”

“Understood,” Tommy raised his hands in surrender. “But hey, in all seriousness buddy, I’m happy for you.”

The plan was only to stay for two drinks, but once he reached the bottom of his second glass, Oliver was nervous. So he decided to order a third. He was just on the edge of throwing himself a pity party full of self-doubt and second-guessing by the time he was ready for a fourth beer. 

Maybe he should take more time with this. Felicity deserved the best. She deserved a romantic, well-planned, possibly public, perfect proposal. Not one where he was unprepared. Just the two of them. At home. Where he could speak his mind and pour his heart to her. And then they could celebrate. Also just the two of them. At home.

And…yeah. That did sound really nice…

But what would Felicity want?

Luckily, Tommy stopped him from spiraling.

As Oliver raised his hand to get the bartender’s attention, his friend swatted it down. “Uh-uh,” Tommy gave him a stern look, “you have a future fiancée to go get home to.”

“I don’t know. Maybe tonight’s not the right night.”

Tommy scoffed, “It won’t be if you keep sitting here drinking with me, like an idiot.” Oliver frowned at being called an idiot. “Don’t overthink it, man. Go get your girl.”

Oliver nodded once, thanking Tommy for the encouragement, which mostly made up for his part in the night of that awful Palmer Tech gala that he and Felicity both preferred not to think about anymore. 

Those doubts were long gone.

After two years with Felicity, he was certain that he could, and would, love her for the rest of his life. He wasn’t worried about growing apart from her anymore. They’d both done plenty of changing in the last two years, and they only grew closer. No matter what happened, or what they said, or how bad the argument was, it just seemed to always work out that way. 

As soon as they left the bar, Oliver said goodbye to Tommy, and he went straight home. 

Felicity, like many nights before this one, was curled up on the couch with a blanket wrapped around herself, a book in her hand, and Bigfoot in her lap. 

The penthouse looked a little different than it did before she moved in. He’d told her that she could do anything she wanted with the place, and she had decided that some rearranging was in order.

But Oliver really didn’t mind. In fact, he preferred it. He had helped her reposition the couch, and redecorate his bedroom more to her liking. Her touches were all over the apartment. And he liked that it was theirs now, rather than just his.

Still, he wasn’t opposed to moving into a house on the outskirts of town. One with more room, where they might need to put some tiny humans one day. Somewhere with a backyard and plenty of space for those kids to play. Maybe even a dog.

But he was getting ahead of himself.

They were happy at the penthouse. That wasn’t something that needed to change right now. There were other steps that they could take first. Such as the diamond ring burning a hole in his pocket.

“Hi, honey,” Oliver greeted quietly, careful not to slam the door and startle her or the cat. Felicity tended to get engrossed in her books. And Bigfoot was just jumpy.

“Hey,” Felicity answered distractedly, her eyes still on the book as she tilted her head up at him.

Oliver smiled fondly, leaning down to kiss the top of her head while he waited for her to finish. “Good read?”

“Mmm,” she hummed, setting the book aside and reaching for his hand. “I had a stressful day.” 

“You did?” He frowned, “Did something happen at work?”

Felicity pursed her lips, “Uh, yeah. Kind of. Come here, come sit.” She squeezed his hand, pulling him to sit down on the couch beside her. She crossed her legs, still holding his hand between both of hers as she turned to face him. 

Oliver’s frown deepened, “You should have told me. I would have come home instead of going out…”

“No, it’s fine,” she shook her head. “I needed a little time alone anyway.”

He watched her for a moment, trying to read the expression on her face, but he couldn’t figure her out like he usually could. And that made him more uneasy than he’d already been. “Baby…what’s wrong?”

Her wide eyes darted up to him, her lips parting before she snapped them shut. “Um, I need to talk to you about something. And I wanted to wait until you were home so I could say it in person.”

His heart sank into his stomach.

Felicity saw the look on his face instantly, her hands reaching up to his neck, drawing his eyes back to her. “No, it’s not...it’s nothing…” she huffed out a frustrated breath. “I actually don’t know where to start. I thought I had figured out what to say, how to tell you, but I just—it’s not an easy thing to—”

“Just tell me,” he choked out. His heart and his head felt unbearably heavy. As did the ring in his pocket. “You’re scaring me, Felicity.”

Her fingers tightened on the back of his neck, and she offered him a small smile. “Oliver, I just want you to know that I love you more than anything in this world. And that will never, ever change. No matter what comes next, okay? No matter how you react or how this might make you feel, I want to be with you. And I’m sorry, I’m totally freaking you out right now, I just want to make sure you know that before I say what I need to say.”

Oliver nodded once, taking a deep breath.

She loves him. So how bad can it be? She wants to be with him. So everything would be okay.

“I think I’m pregnant,” Felicity finally whispered, her voice so soft in the silent apartment that he wasn’t sure he heard her right at first. But the words settled. And Oliver’s mind went completely blank, hearing it replay over and over in his mind but not truly grasping them. 

Fear was the first thing that registered. And the most notable feeling. Because as much as he was thinking about the future, and planning a life with Felicity, and hoping to have kids, it wasn’t something that he was expecting to happen now.

After the way their relationship had started; with all the problems, setbacks, and misunderstandings, he just wanted to make sure he did the rest of it right. Two years together, and they still had a lot to learn. But they were doing everything right. Taking the steps slowly and carefully. Felicity liked to say that they were swimming in the shallow end, where things were safe. Less risk of either of them getting overwhelmed. Drowning.

When they decided to move in together, they made sure that they were both completely comfortable with it, no doubts or rushed decisions. And he assumed that their engagement and wedding would go the same way. By taking all the baby steps they needed to take and doing it as slowly as they needed to do it.

But this ?

This was the deep end.

“Oliver,” she whispered, her hands sliding down to his shoulders where she gave him a slight shake. “I know I said you’re allowed to react however you need to, but I wasn’t expecting you to go catatonic.”

“I…” he shook his head, trying to clear it. 

Pregnant. Felicity might be pregnant.

“You said you think you could be pregnant?”

“Yes. I’m a few days late. I took a test at work today, just because I’m never late and I figured I could rule out the whole ‘oh god, what if I’m pregnant!?’ idea, but, um...it was positive. And you know, it could just be a fluke. I have another test that I want to take tonight, and I scheduled an appointment for next week, so I just...I wanted to tell you.”

“I don’t know what to say,” Oliver whispered back.

She smiled up at him, her eyes shining with unshed tears, and gently squeezed his shoulders. “Two years ago in Coast City, we decided that our relationship was worth the risk of our friendship. We agreed to allow ourselves to fall in love, Oliver. And we both know we’ve been letting life go easy on us ever since. So, you could tell me the same thing you told me back then.”

He stared back at her, relaxing, if only a little, as he saw that smile of hers. She wasn’t angry, or upset, or panicking. And that was keeping him grounded, too. “What did I say?”

“That you weren’t afraid,” Felicity whispered. “That you weren’t afraid to love me, or for me to love you. And I told you that you bring out the best in me. And then you said—”

“I said that as long as we can look at each other and know that that’s true, we would be okay.”

She nodded, chewing on her lip as she looked up at him. “So, is it still true?”

He stared back into her eyes, reminded of those days. Days that felt like a lifetime ago. Two kids, terrified of opening their hearts to each other but realizing that they were already in too deep to stop it, and finally letting themselves feel it. 

They’d spent the last two years ensuring that there were no surprises. And now they might be getting the biggest surprise of all.

“It’s still true,” he breathed. “Always will be.”

“Good,” she let out a breath. “Well...I guess we should take that second test, huh?”

Felicity was sitting at the counter in the kitchen, her attention being shared between the magazine she was reading and the boyfriend who was busy cooking dinner. It had become a tradition ever since the first night he cooked her dinner. Their first item on that silly list. 

Of course, Oliver didn’t always have time to cook. But when he did, Felicity enjoyed watching, and mostly pretending that she wasn’t. For whatever reason, she found it really sexy to watch him in the kitchen. 

She’d told him as much, which he had really enjoyed learning. And using it to his advantage. She was especially excited when she’d wake her up on a Saturday morning and find him making pancakes.  

Tonight though, it was all about the distraction.

Felicity was expecting a call from her doctor, after having blood drawn a couple of days ago. 

They had two positive pregnancy tests and they were both trying not to get too stressed out about it until they knew for sure. It was still very early, which Dr. Negret said could cause a false positive. Something about a chemical pregnancy that Felicity tried to explain to him after her appointment but he couldn’t quite follow since he couldn’t think of anything more than ‘holy shit, what if I’m about to be a dad? Holy shit, holy shit,’ for the past week. 

Cooking wasn’t a very good distraction, apparently.

Pursing his lips, Oliver glanced over his shoulder at Felicity and quietly asked, “Did Dr. Negret say when she would call, or…?”

Felicity leveled him with a look, clearly not impressed that he was bringing it up. He knew the idea that she could be pregnant was on both of their minds. All day, all night, all week. After a moment, she sighed and set her magazine down. “She wasn’t sure, she said as soon as the lab got back to her, she’d let me know.”

Oliver smiled, offering a small nod in response, and turned back to the stove. Usually when he cooked, Felicity would either insist on helping with something or she would lean against the counter beside him, munching on some kind of pre-dinner snack, while she told him all about her day. He understood why she wasn’t in a talkative mood tonight, though. And he didn’t really mind the silence. 

Her company was enough.

It wasn’t until they were both sitting at the table, quietly picking at their plates, that her phone rang.

“Oh thank god,” Felicity breathed, her fork clanging against her plate as she dropped it and lunged for the phone. “Dr. Negret, hi,” she answered. 

His hand automatically found her free one, squeezing it tight on top of the table. 

Felicity looked up at him, giving him a reassuring smile in response. He stared at her as she listened, and Felicity kept her eyes glued to his.

After a few long seconds, her smile began to slip, her eyes flickering as she sucked in a sharp breath. “Yes,” she whispered. “Yes, I understand. Thank you.”

As soon as she hung up the phone, she looked back at him, her smile tight. “I’m not pregnant, Oliver. It was a false alarm. Dr. Negret said if I took another test now, it would read negative. And she said that women my age usually have changes in their periods, and I could be late for any number of things.”

“Oh,” he mumbled, somewhat surprised at the overwhelming disappointment he felt.

He’d been so busy trying to mentally prepare himself for the news that Felicity was truly pregnant, he hadn’t taken the time to fully process how he might feel if she wasn’t . 

Oliver shook his head, gently stroking his thumb across her hand. “I just thought...I mean, I know we would have figured it out if we were having a baby, but I guess I just thought that I would be, you know, okay with it if we weren’t. I figured I’d just be relieved and that would be the end of it.”

“And what are you feeling now?”

“A little sad,” he admitted.

Felicity nodded, smiling softly as she answered, “Me too.”

His eyes darted up to her, “You are?”

“Yeah,” she lifted his hand to her mouth, gently kissing his knuckles. “Part of me was kind of...getting excited. I mean, it’s not like it would be the worst situation. We’re together. We love each other. I don’t think there’s anything more that I would need in order to bring a kid into this world than this .”

Instantly, he thought about the ring. 

It was currently hidden beneath the cooking utensils in a kitchen drawer because he knew Felicity would never go in there. And he seriously considered standing up from the table to get it right at that moment. But he decided against it just as quickly. There would be a better time, one that would be about them and not about the sadness they were both feeling, a future that they’d both been envisioning all week but not saying out loud.

Someday, they would know what the opposite side of this feeling was like.

Someday, they would have it.

But for tonight, Oliver just wanted to be with Felicity. Curl up on the couch and rub her feet, maybe talk about those quiet dreams…

So that was exactly what he did.

It was the perfect night for a girls’ night. 

Oliver was, reluctantly, out of town on a business trip. And Felicity didn’t feel like being alone. So she decided to invite some friends to the penthouse and make a thing of it.

Alena arrived first, as usual. Felicity smiled as she opened the door for her, Alena lifted a giant pitcher above her head, beaming back as she squealed, “I made sangria!”

Then came Nyssa and Sara, who didn’t bother knocking and instead walked right into the apartment while Felicity and Alena were fixing drinks in the kitchen. “Honey, I’m home!” Sara hollered.

“In here!” Felicity called back, rolling her eyes. 

Sara, coming as no surprise, waltzed in with a bottle of tequila in each of her hands.

“Jesus, Sara,” Alena chuckled. “I thought we agreed to take it easy tonight.”

Tossing her a wink, Sara set the bottles on the counter. “No, you agreed to take it easy tonight. I’m hoping to entice you with a repeat of New Year's Eve.”

Felicity cleared her throat, stifling a laugh behind her wine glass at the reminder. Alena rarely got drunk, but when they threw a New Years Eve party at the penthouse earlier that year, Alena had apparently decided it was the time to let loose. Luckily most of the guests had left by the time she got up on the table to dance, and Tommy had stopped her before any clothes came off. “Well,” Felicity pinched her lips together. “Now it makes sense why you acted so weird when I told you Alena was coming.”

Sara smirked, tapping her nails against the tequila bottle, “Oh yeah. I expect everyone to be ‘Alena on New Year’s Eve’ level drunk within three hours.”

Nyssa ran her hand through Sara’s hair, “I have to apologize for her. We’re still—um...on island time.”

“I’ll bet,” Alena raised an eyebrow. “Happy anniversary, by the way. It looked amazing! I was showing Tommy all the pictures you posted and now he thinks we need to take a trip to Fiji, too.”

“Oh, you guys totally should!” Sara gushed. “We did a couple of hikes and the views were unreal . I can hook you up with all the best places to go.”

“You’re going to have to tell us everything,” Felicity leaned against the counter, wanting to hear every detail of their epic, romantic anniversary trip. Since she wasn’t the most spontaneous person, she enjoyed living vicariously through her favorite couple. Nyssa and Sara could pick a place on a map, pack their bags, and be on a flight the next day. They had zero fear when it came to things like that, and of course there was a part of Felicity that envied their sense of adventure.

She watched as Nyssa toyed with her wedding ring, and Sara scrunched her nose at her wife. The look that passed between the two of them made her heart swell. She loved them both, and she loved their love. And yep, this night was exactly what she needed.

After a moment, Sara sighed, “Well, we’re going to need a few drinks in us before we tell you everything .” 

Felicity nodded once, promptly pulling two more wine glasses from the cupboard and filling them with Alena’s sangria. Then they all moved over to the couches and Felicity turned on the fireplace while Nyssa got the radio going.

“So, how’s Oliver these days?” Sara asked once they were all settled. “Too busy to call his best friend, I see.”

“Yeah,” Felicity shrugged. “Work has been crazy for him lately, but he’s good.”

“He wasn’t too excited to be spending time away from you when he stopped by the other day,” Alena smirked. 

“I know,” Felicity couldn’t help but smile, too. Considering the fact that they saw each other every single day, it would be understandable if a little break was something they looked forward to. But even after two years, they both dreaded any time they had to be apart. “But he’ll be home tomorrow.”

As promised, the girls had a few drinks while they caught the others up on each of their lives. And the more they drank, the more they shared, fringing into ‘Too Much Information’ territory after Sara insisted on tequila shots.

It started with the married couple telling them about their time in Fiji, but eventually it took a turn when Sara confessed that they’d gotten a little caught up in a moment under a waterfall, which led to Alena admitting that she and Tommy often enjoyed the great outdoors on their weekend camping trips. And Felicity just stared at each of them in surprise as they spoke.

“What?” Nyssa poked her arm, reading her expression. “You and Oliver have never messed around outside?”

“Under the stars…” Alena sighed dreamily.

Felicity frowned, “Well, Oliver does like those windows…” she snapped her mouth shut, cursing the tequila and her loose lips as her cheeks heated. “I mean, I guess the opportunity just hasn’t presented itself,” she huffed, her eyes flickering to her friends. Nyssa had the decency to look shy, but Sara watched her with a wide, knowing grin. And Alena cocked her head to the side, staring at the floor to ceiling window like it was a puzzle. “Okay,” Felicity groaned, nudging Alena’s shoulder to get her to stop, “Next time I take a walk in the park with my boyfriend I’ll be sure to jump his bones, all right?”

Sara chuckled, “I think we’re all just surprised that there’s something the two of you have never done. Since you know, you did tell me once that you have sex at least once a day.”

Felicity’s mouth fell open, “Hey! I told you that in drunken secrecy! And besides, that was like, a year ago!”

“And now we’re drunk again so I can say it!” Sara argued.

“That’s not how that works! But just because we haven’t done it outside and just because we’re not doing it every day anymore doesn’t mean we...don’t keep things interesting.”

Sara raised her hands, arching an eyebrow, “No one said otherwise, girlfriend.”

“Sorry,” Felicity huffed. “It’s just...he’s been out of town, so…”

“Right,” Alena scoffed, “Like you haven’t utilized the perks of modern technology.”

Felicity stared blankly at her, not understanding what the hell she was talking about. But then it clicked and her face fell. “Oh my god, I hadn’t even thought about it...is that bad? Am I bad girlfriend if I haven’t tried to have phone sex with my boyfriend while he’s out of town? Am I boring!?”

“Oh. No!” Alena quickly shook her head, “No, no, no, no, no. That was stupid of me to say. Of course there’s nothing wrong with that! Or not doing that!”

Still, she felt defensive.

“He’s taken trips like this before and we...um, I sent him pictures once or twice but we’ve never…you guys have?”

Alena pursed her lips, her silence a clear yes.

Nyssa patted her leg, “Don’t worry about it, Felicity. Sara and I have never bothered, either.”

Maybe she wouldn’t feel so strange about it if it was just this business trip. But her and Oliver’s sex life hadn’t exactly been active in the week leading up to his leaving. Everything else between them was fine, of course. They just hadn’t been intimate since…

“I thought I was pregnant,” Felicity suddenly blurted out.

Each of her friends paused, three sets of wide eyes landing on her. 

“It was just a scare,” she mumbled. “But it freaked Oliver out pretty bad. And me too.”

Sara was the first to move, her expression soft as she leaned over to squeeze Felicity’s hand. “That must have been tough.”

“It was,” Felicity sighed, her eyebrows furrowing. “I mean, I think it’s just been on both of our minds lately. But It’s not like anything is wrong, he’s still as affectionate as ever, we just…haven’t been in the mood. It was a lot of confusing emotions, you know? ”

“That seems perfectly normal,” Alena chimed in, giving Felicity a warm smile. 

“Yeah,” she shrugged. “The weird thing that I can’t really seem to shake though is that...I think I was actually... hoping I was pregnant.”

When Felicity opened her eyes the next morning, she was abruptly aware of the pain in her head and in her back. She was on her couch, in the same spot where she’d fallen asleep after the girls had gone home. With a pounding headache that told her she definitely had too much to drink, and a sharp pain in her spine that told her she should have crawled up the stairs to bed instead of crashing on the couch. And apparently Bigfoot had decided to come out of hiding once her friends had left, because he was sound asleep on her chest.

Groaning, Felicity shifted Bigfoot onto the couch and rolled over the side. She stood up slowly, feeling the consequences of the night before as she heard a few bones cracking, disagreeing with all the movement. 

“Ugh,” she complained to herself, squinting her eyes to look around the apartment. They’d left quite a mess if she remembered right. They’d moved the furniture to dance and pulled apart most of Oliver’s CD collection in search of the best music.

But everything was tidy.

Felicity frowned, certain that her friends hadn’t been sober enough by the time their uber picked them up to clean up after themselves. 

Her eyes flickered to the kitchen, where she saw Oliver leaning against the counter, his arms crossed and his shirt sleeves rolled up, with a towel thrown over his shoulder. He looked delicious. 

“You’re home,” Felicity croaked.

Oliver winced as he watched her, “How are you feeling?”

Felicity walked, or hobbled, right into his arms. She closed her eyes and took in a few deep breaths of his familiar scent, feeling his warm hands on her back and his lips in her hair before she replied. Just so she could give an honest answer, “Better now.”

He kept one hand on her back, smoothing his fingers up and down the length of her spine. With the other, he reached out to pick something off the counter, and Felicity opened her eyes, watching in confusion as he unfolded a piece of paper that seemed vaguely familiar. “I found this under the couch while I was cleaning up,” Oliver explained. “And I thought it was very interesting.”

Suddenly, the memory of what she and her friends had done came rushing back. “Oh no,” Felicity gasped. “Don’t.”

Oliver ignored her, gently squeezing his hand on her hip as he cleared his throat, “Number one: phone sex.”

“Oliver,” Felicity yelped, “no, no, no!”

“Sweetheart, shh, it’s fine. I already read the whole thing while you were asleep. There’s just a couple of things I wasn’t sure about thanks to your drunken chicken scratch handwriting. Like number six? Right here? Does this say ‘bondage?’”

“Oh my god,” she dropped her forehead against his chest. “Frack.”

“Hey, it’s okay,” Oliver chuckled, his breath blowing over her head. “I’m just saying, if you were going to make another list for us, I think my input should at least be considered.”

“That wasn’t...We weren’t…” Felicity let out a miserable groan, “I blame tequila. And Sara.”

“Uh huh, sure. So tell me, how serious are we about this?”

“Oliver,” she grumbled. “I can’t even remember what we put on there. All I remember is it started because—” she quickly snapped her lips shut as the memory of the night before came back to her. What they were talking about before the idea of making that list came to fruition. 

He leaned back, looking into her eyes, his expression changing as he saw that she was holding something back. “What is it?” Oliver cocked his head to the side. “How did you and the girls end up making a list of sex ideas? Not that I’m complaining, because clearly it’s for us since this one says ‘Oliver can lick—’”

“Eh!” Felicity huffed, cutting him off. She recognized that honesty was the only option, even if she wasn’t quite sure how she felt about the things that her friends and the tequila had brought to the surface. “I told them about the pregnancy scare,” she whispered. “And I may have said that I want a baby, and that may have spiraled into talking about you and I making babies.” She was too nervous to notice that Oliver had gone completely still. “I’m a little fuzzy on why we decided to make a list of sex ideas, or why phone sex would be on it, since, you know, that wouldn’t do the trick—”

“Fe-li-ci-ty,” he breathed out her name, putting an end to her babbling. “You want a baby? Like...now?”

She gaped at him, her eyes going wide. “I—well, yes? I mean, I just think, you know, now, later, if we just wanted to let it happen whenever it’s going to happen...that would be fine by me.”

“Well, I can tell you right now that I’m not opposed to this idea…but there is something else that I wanted to talk to you about. And I think I should let you know how I feel before we make any babies.”

She frowned up at him as he took a step back, putting enough space between them that he could reach into his pocket and pull out his wallet. 

Then he handed over a piece of paper of his own.

“Is this what I think it is?” Felicity asked cautiously as she unfolded it. She shook her head, reading the list and remembering the night they’d written those words. How unsure she’d been about how it would all turn out. Afraid and half-expecting everything to crash and burn.

She’d never been happier to be wrong.

Felicity frowned as she read the last item on the list, one that was written in Oliver’s handwriting and she was sure hadn’t been there two years ago. “Try something new?” She read the words aloud, her eyes shifting back to Oliver.

He smiled at her before taking another step back.

And then he lifted his hand, holding a ring in front of her face that instantly sent her heart lurching into her throat. 

“Felicity,” he whispered. “You have been a constant in my life since the moment I met you. Your friendship has made my life more meaningful. Your love has made me a better man. I remember, and I cherish every moment that I’m lucky enough to spend with you. I want to keep doing that for the rest of my life.”

She felt moisture prick at her eyes, but she couldn’t take them off of him. It didn’t matter that she was hungover and probably looked like a mess. It was the perfect moment. And she knew that he had more to say, but she couldn’t help herself. “Oh god, I love you.”

Oliver shook his head in amusement, letting out a sharp breath of a laugh. “Felicity Smoak, I love you with my whole heart. Would you please make me the happiest man on the face of this earth, and let me be your husband?”

“Yes,” Felicity answered without hesitation. For a girl who was no stranger to cynicism and hesitation, she was happy to say that word, to answer that question, without a single shred of doubt. “Of course you can be my husband.”

As Oliver slid the diamond onto her finger, Felicity took a second to appreciate it. It was simple and elegant. Beautiful. And as she stared down at it, she knew that it was hers. Would always be hers. Just like the man who had given it to her.

He leaned in to kiss her, and Felicity kissed him back, pouring all of her love, joy, and gratitude into it. “There’s just one problem with your addition to that list,” she mumbled against his lips after a while.

“What’s that?” Oliver mumbled back, still holding her face between his hands as his nose caressed hers.

“You said we would try something new,” she whispered the words to the corner of his mouth, running her lips across his bottom one to the other side. “And Oliver Queen, every new experience that I have in this life, I want it to be with you.”

Oliver hummed in agreement, his hands slowly trailing down her sides, anchoring to her hips. And then he picked her up without warning, setting her down on the counter. He didn’t give her a moment to catch her breath before his mouth was on hers again. “If you’re talking about making babies again,” he growled between kisses. “Then we can work on that right now.”

She smiled, carding her fingers through his hair as she spread her legs and wrapped them around his waist, drawing him closer. “Well, we’ve never been the type of couple to take things one at a time; friendship, love, marriage, parenthood, it all just sort of mixes together after a while, right?”

“Yeah, I’d say so…” 

Felicity was too caught up in the next kiss to realize that Oliver had that damn paper again. “Mm,” he pulled his lips away from hers, his attention turning to the list that she and the girls had made. “So about number nine…”

Rolling her eyes, she snatched the paper from his hand and tossed it over her shoulder. Then she wrapped both of her arms around his neck. “All you need to focus on right now is showing your future wife what I have to look forward to for the rest of our lives.”

Oliver’s eyes sparked with new passion as soon as the word wife had left her lips. “That I can do,” he promised. Then he hoisted her off the counter and carried her upstairs, and made good on that promise.

Every word he said to her that day, Oliver meant. Every day after it, Felicity returned that love and commitment just as fully. 

She always kept the balance in their life, never letting them slip too far. He always kept his promises, not just to her, but to the family that they’d eventually grow. 

As with anything, not every step was perfect. Things didn’t always go the way they expected or wanted them to. 

But they brought out the best in each other. 

And for the rest of their life together, there was never a day when that wasn’t true.