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Chapter Text

Peter’s tray thunked as he dropped it on the table. It wasn’t nearly as much food as he ate some days, but for the shitty cafeteria stuff public school gave out, it was like a mountain. He only ate lunch with Ned and MJ--both of whom knew about Spiderman--so generally there wasn’t much explaining to do about just how much he ate. However, he was still careful about not looking like too much of a freak because, of all the ways to be outed, the fact that he ate a lot was a stupid one. And no, it wasn’t insecurity, it was keeping his identity a secret. That. Definitely that. 

At home, the Tower, Peter could clean out any and all takeout orders with ease. The penthouse kitchen currently had three refrigerators, a pantry the size of his old bedroom, and two ovens. Even that was barely enough to feed two super soldiers, two ex assassins, three mad scientists, two badass women, one woman with magic powers, a man with metal wings, a spiderling, and a literal robot. Let it be known that Peter loved his family, but damn they could eat. He could still remember the great Thai feast of 2018. The fact that listing them sounded like the 12 days of Christmas also didn’t help. 

“Peter,” MJ said, jerking him out of his thoughts, “Please tell Ned here that Criminal Minds is an incredible tv show that is necessary for literally everyone to see.” She leaned across the table to look him in the eyes while Ned gave him a pleading look behind her back. 

“Um, well, you know--”

“ You’ve never seen it? ”

“I’m sorry! I know you told me to watch it a while ago, but I’ve just been so busy!”

“You’re not too busy to spend nearly every night at Ned’s watching Star Wars!”

“Not every night!”

“Uh huh, sure. But you will watch it, right?”

“Yeah yeah, I will, swear. So,” he turned to Ned without skipping a beat, “Tonight, your house? Legos, ice cream, and The Empire Strikes Back?” Ned nodded enthusiastically, but MJ sighed quietly and lightly touched her hand to her forehead. It was her version of an over-dramatic groan. 

“ Again ?” she asked, “Do you guys do anything else with your free time? No wait, don’t answer that, we both know you don’t.”

“Hey, don’t hate! Star Wars is too cool for you, anyway,” Peter joked and dug into one of his three baskets of tater tots. 

“Dude. It’s our senior year and you are spending it holed up in Ned’s basement watching kids’ movies.”

“How dare you!” Ned gasped, “Peter, why are we even friends with her? She just insulted the biggest movie franchise in history!”

“Nerds,” MJ laughed.

“Like you aren’t one too,” Peter cut in with a smile and popped a tot in his mouth. In the past year he had become much closer with MJ, and was even on a level where he could tease her. Tease MJ . “There’s a reason I’m only second highest scoring in this school, Ms. Jones.”

“First of all: I’m smart, not a nerd. Second: If you call me that again I’ll punch you in the mouth so hard you bite your own heart.” Ned looked terrified, but Peter was unfazed. Living with the Avengers and their weirdass threats did that to a person. 

“We both know you just quoted Brooklyn 99, MJ. But noted.” 

“Ugh, alright, the rest of your plan is cool, but tonight I’m coming too and we’re watching Criminal Minds .”

“All of it?”

“Uh, no, man. There’s like 15 seasons. We can probably get through like the first season if we watch until really late. It’s a Friday though, we have all the time in the world. You’d better have some cookie dough.” The boys merely nodded in agreement, knowing there was no point in fighting her on it. “Anyway,” she said, “I’ve got something. Peace out losers,” She flashed them the bird and swaggered out of the room. It seemed like either her tray had magically disappeared, or she didn’t get one in the first place. Either was very possible. Peter would never put anything past MJ. 

“...Something?” Ned asked.

“I’ve got no clue, and I really doubt she’s going to tell us.”

“Fair enough.” 

Peter dug back into his food, this time focusing on the half-decent mac n cheese. 

They slid into the kind of silence you can only get with your best friend. Where there isn’t any need to talk or fill the air with senseless chatter. You already know each other so well, there’s no point in talking when you can be completely comfortable with the quiet. 

That is, until it’s very rudely interrupted by the friendly neighborhood bully. 

“Hey, Penis!” Flash grinned as he slid into the seat directly beside Peter with no invitation whatsoever. “I just can’t wait until Decathlon this afternoon! You’re gonna love the announcement!” 

“What do you want, Flash?” Peter grumbled, annoyed and bored at the same time. He rolled his eyes at Ned, who was looking on with pinched eyebrows.

“I just thought you’d like to know, Petey-pie! Big news today, I really think you’ll like it!”

“Is that so?” Peter’s voice dripped with sarcasm. He let Flash bully him because it was better him than others, but he felt no need to be nice about it. 

“Yep! I think a lot of secrets are gonna be revealed real soon!” 

“Ok Flash, thank you for that courteous announcement. Can I eat my food in peace now?” 

“Sure thing, Penis!” Flash cackled, fucking cackled , then scurried off to his own table. Asshole. 

“So?” prompted Ned. He was met with blank confusion.

“So what?”

“What do you think the announcement’s going to be?”

“I dunno, and I don’t really care. If Flash is that excited about it, it can’t be good.” 

“Are you worried about it then?”

“Eh,” Peter shrugged.

“ Eh ?”

“Well, I don’t know, okay! Like, I can’t think of anything that could be super terrible, unless they’re going to kick me off the team. I guess I’ll just… deal with whatever happens, no reason to worry, right?”

“Yeah, right.” Ned nodded, seemingly pacified. 

And it was nothing to worry about. Really, nothing. Nothing at all. But that did nothing to stop Peter from worrying about it constantly.

Calculus test? That conversation was in the back of his mind.

AP Bio experiment? He nearly spilled acid all over his front because he was thinking about what would happen if he were kicked off the team. 

Lecture on the Civil War? He thought about how Flash probably knew all about his superhero identity and was going to reveal him to the whole world. 

Dodgeball during gym? He planned how he would survive in the world if the school expelled him, Tony and May decided they didn’t want him anymore, and his suit was taken away. 

And somehow, somehow , the actual result was even worse. Well, not worse than the last one, but it still really sucked. 

The literal second he walked in the door it started going downhill. Flash was sidled up beside Mr. Harrison, whispering with him. Peter strained his spider-enhanced hearing, but the room was already so loud that he couldn’t make out the conversation before Flash split off to go bother Peter.

He hitched his bag up higher on his back and quickened his steps in one last attempt to reach his seat before Flash got to him, but it was in vain. 

“So, Penis, you excited to hear the big announcement?” He smirked. 

“Considering you’re so happy about it, no, I’m really not.” Peter slouched into a seat beside MJ, who was sitting right in the front, closest to Mr. Harrison. Once she had taken charge, her attitude during practice had really changed. She used to just sit in the back of class and glare at people, barely saying anything except to answer a question. She was still just as sullen, but now she was angry and in charge. 

Peter was glad that she sat so close to Mr. Harrison now. Maybe keeping the teacher in hearing distance would at least shield him from Flash. True to his hopes, Flash slunk off after glancing at the teacher and found his own seat. 

MJ turned to grin at him and Ned, who had just sat beside him. A gleam in her eye made Peter think maybe she already knew what the announcement would be. With the way it looked like she was expecting bloodshed, his fear skyrocketed. 

“Alright everyone!” Mr. Harrington clapped his hands and grinned hugely. “I have some great news for you all! The team trip for this year has been decided, and thanks to some generous sponsors,” Flash nudged his friends and whispered ‘ My parents’ in their ears, “We will be going to none other than Stark Tower !” The room erupted into cheers and wild whispering about the trip. Nearly everyone leapt out of their seats to rejoice in this incredible turn of events. Everyone, that is except a certain spider-child. He was currently slipping into a panic attack. 

Peter’s ears rung. His breath stopped. His heart pulsed loudly in his chest. Stark Tower. The Tower. Home. His home. 

Fuck.

Art For Chapter 1

Chapter Text

Peter was numb. His senses blanked out until he was trapped in his own head, barely comprehending the ruckus going on around him. He couldn’t hear, couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe . One thought just kept bouncing around in his brain, sharp stabs of pain in his chest accompanying it’s every move. They’re going to find out. They’re going to find out. They’re going to find out.

About Spiderman. About Tony. About his fake real internship and his Avengers family. About him. 

“Peter?” MJ’s face filled his vision. For once, emotion flitted across her face. She was worried about him. Of course she was. Peter was such a wreck that even his most emotionless friend realized it. 

“I-I have to go. Um, can’t come tonight.” He lurched to his feet, barely remembering to grab his bag, and somehow made it out the door on legs that felt like he had just gone ten rounds on the teacup ride in Disney World. 

“Peter!” he heard Ned call out behind him, but he just sped up. He couldn’t deal with that now. He couldn’t deal with his best friend fawning over his family when all he wanted to do was leavegogetoutgoescape . 

Halfway down the hallway he finally lost control of his feet and collapsed against a locker. It felt like it did when he got bitten. Disoriented. Panicked. Terrified. 

Peter sunk to the ground, knees tucked up against his chest. He practiced the breathing his therapist taught him. Slowly, very slowly, he came back to himself. 

“Okay, Peter,” he told himself as calmly as he could, “This is bad. But you can freak out later. Right now, leave. Get to Happy’s car. Go home. Go to your room. Then you can freak.” He narrated each step as he went along. “Stand up, Peter. Walk forward. Turn left. Open the doors. Go down the steps. Wave at Happy. Smile. Shut up now, he’ll hear you.”

He slid into the backseat of the car, praying Happy wouldn’t notice the pain that must be obvious on his face.

“Hey Happy,” he said, trying to be as cheerful as ever, “How was your day? Tell me everything about it!” 

“It was fine,” Happy grunted at him before raising the screen. Exactly what he was hoping for. The more he asked of Happy, the sooner the screen went up.

Peter slumped back against the seat; his smile vanished as soon as the screen closed. A single tear tracked its way down his face. He furiously wiped it away. That could wait. For now, he needed to get home. 

He spent the ride in silence. Not moving a muscle, backpack still clutched in his lap, Peter’s mind went wild. 

They’re going to find out. They’re going to tell Mr. Stark how horrible I actually am. Flash is going to talk sense into him. He won’t want me anymore. I’ll have to leave. Pepper likes May too much to make her leave. I’ll be alone. No one really likes me, I know that. All Ned talks to me about anymore is Spiderman. That’s the only reason he’s my friend. MJ likes me because of how much crisis there is in my life. Isn’t that just great, pick the poor trans orphan to be your friend, just so you can draw his sad little face. Who would want me? This is the end. The end of it all. Once everyone knows my secrets, I’ll be alone. Alone. 

The same thoughts just kept repeating themselves. More tears appeared on his cheeks, and were rubbed away just as quick. He didn’t deserve to cry. 

Happy pulled into the private parking lot and parked the car. Peter shot out of the car, yelling a “Thanks Mr. Happy!” over his shoulder and hoped he hadn’t noticed his tear stained face. 

“FRIDAY?” he said quietly in the elevator, “Take me straight up to the penthouse; I don’t want to go to the lab today.”

“Of course, BabyStark,” she said kindly. Normally the nickname brought a huge smile to his face. Today he flinched. “Should I inform Boss of your decision? Would you like him to meet you there?” Yes. Yes, I want to meet him there. I want him to hold me in his arms and tell me he does care about me, I’m like a son to him. I want him to promise me that he won’t ever abandon me. I want him to love me. 

“No, that’s okay. Tell him where I am if he asks, though.” 

“Yes, sir.” The elevator began to rise. He spent the ride motionless, still trapped in his own head.

The second the doors opened he hurried towards his room. Thankfully it looked like none of the Avengers were around, May was at work, and Pepper was surely in yet another meeting. Tony always met Peter in the labs after school, so there was no chance of him already being up here. 

However, when he entered his room, Peter’s panic only grew. He threw his bag somewhere, and began pacing dents in the carpet. He wrung his hands, pulled his hair, shook his head. His little circle grew wider as he grew more and more frantic, until he ended up doing loops of the entire room, including the ceiling.

This is bad. This is so so so bad. How do I fix it? Do I not go? Do I tell Mr. Stark? Do I not tell Mr. Stark? Do I run away to Wakanda and live my days as Shuri’s strange assistant who always wears a mask? Oh god, she won’t take me either. I really will lose all my friends. Everyone. May and Pepper and Tony and MJ and Ned and Shuri and there won’t be anymore Hair Club or Superheroing or family movie nights or Steve making pancakes or training days or shopping with Wanda and Nat or teaching Bucky vines or building suits with Tony or web hammocks in the lab...

The thoughts just kept coming. Peter sunk back to the ground and crouched just like he had in the Midtown hallway, but this time he couldn’t get his breathing under control. It wheezed in and out of him and he buried his face in his knees and clutched at his hair. He barely noticed that he was sobbing with each breath, tears rushing out of his eyes. 

He didn’t hear the door open. He didn’t hear the halt of feet and breath of the person in the doorway. He didn’t the whispered “Oh, Pete,” out of his dad’s mentor’s lungs.

He didn’t notice him until he stood right below him.

“Pete, look at me, kid.”

“Mis-Mister Stark?” He lifted his shaking head to look at the man. Pain was written all over his face. “Why are you on the ceiling?”

“I’m not, Peter. You are.”

“Oh.”

“Can you come down?” Peter nodded, and didn’t take the time to think about how he would do so. Instead he just let go. And landed right on top of Tony.

“Oof,” he grunted under the weight of his the kid. Peter’s fall had knocked them both to the ground. Peter stared at him for a moment, still in shock, before realizing what had just happened. 

“ Oh my God , Mr. Stark, I’m so sorry ,” he gasped, speaking in Italian like he only did when he couldn’t focus enough to translate to English. He scrambled off of Tony’s chest and put his back up against the wall. He hunched up, looking like a frightened animal. He felt like it too.

“Hey, hey, Pete, it’s okay.” Tony reached out a careful hand, speaking Italian as well. “I’m okay. Are you?” Peter nodded. “Good. Wanna tell me what’s wrong?” Peter shook his head. “Okay. Can I touch you?” 

“Ye-yeah,” Peter’s voice shook and he looked at Tony with apprehension. Tony smiled softly. He scooted forward, not bothering to get to his feet, and sat next to Peter. Hesitantly, he wrapped an arm around the boy’s shoulders, and moments later found himself with a lap full of spider-child. Peter shoved his face into Tony’s chest and sobbed heavily, clutching at his shirt. 

“You’re safe, Pete, you’re safe.” Tony closed his arm more firmly around Peter’s back and rubbed it soothingly. His other began lightly brushing through the boy’s soft curls. “You’re going to be okay buddy. I know it feels pretty awful right now, but I promise to do my damndest to get rid of whatever it is that did this to you. Take your time telling me, but I promise you I will protect you.”

“You-you will?” Peter’s voice was muffled by Tony’s shirt.

“Of course I will, kiddo. You matter so much to me, I never want anything to hurt you.”

“I do? Matter?” Tony looked down at the boy in his arms. How the hell did this kid think he didn’t matter? He was everything! He was kind, compassionate, cheerful, and a genius to boot! He was everything Tony wished he could’ve become. 

“Of course you do, Peter. You’re you. You mean so much to me.” He took a deep breath. Even to the kid, this was hard to say. “I love you Peter.” 

Peter’s head lifted up to look at him. Tony’s heart broke at the tear tracks on his face, the way he looked genuinely shocked that he was loved. 

“You do? Why?” Tony’s heart clenched and his veins filled with rage. Whoever made his kid feel like this would pay .

“Because you’re Peter Parker. You made your own web shooters in a school lab, then went on to become part of the Avengers at age fifteen. You’re kind to everyone you meet, even if they don’t deserve it. You’re so incredible Peter, it breaks my heart that you don’t know that. And… You’re family. Peter, you’re like a son to me. That’s why I love you.” It took all of Tony’s confidence to say that. He waited with trepidation for Peter’s reaction. Please don’t hate me. Please don’t hate me. Please don’t hate me.

“I’m like your… son?” 

“Yeah, Underoos.” Peter broke down sobbing once more. For a second Tony thought he’d done something horribly wrong, but then Peter started talking.

“I love you too. I love you so much, Mr. Stark. I-I didn’t th-think you’d feel the same way because I’m me and you’re T-tony freaking Stark but you d-do and you’re like my dad and now I’m l-like your son.” Tony was crying too, now.

“Yeah, you are, kid. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.” He clutched Peter back into his chest, overjoyed and heartbroken at this turn of events. 

They were quiet for a long time after that. Neither made a move to get up, they were both too happy right where they were to go anywhere else. Peter stopped crying after a while, and after that they just sat in silence. 

“Hey, Peter,” Tony said eventually, “What happened?” Peter took a deep breath, then began to explain in rapid-fire Italian. 

“This kid Flash in my class convinced his parents to pay for a field trip here, and I’m pretty sure one of the main reasons is because he doesn’t believe I have an internship here. He’s been teasing me since freshman year, but it got a lot worse since word got around that I work here. My Decathlon team is going to come and walk around my home, while none of them believe I even have the internship. I just… freaked out, I guess. I convinced myself that Flash would tell you all that I’m not worth it, and you would believe him. I thought I was going to lose everything, all because of some stupid field trip.” Peter was crying again. “I mean, I know it doesn’t make any sense, but it did right then, you know?”

“Yeah, Pete, I get it. My brain gets like that too. But why didn’t you come to me?”

“I didn’t think you’d want to deal with some stupid teenage freak out.” He was back to English now, obviously calm enough to translate in his head. Peter looked down at his lap, embarrassed. 

“Peter, I don’t care how stupid you think it is, I want to be able to help. I told you, I love you, and I want to make sure that you’re okay.” Peter nodded weakly. “And Pete?”

“Yeah?”

“Exactly how bad is this Flash kid?”

“Um, he’s not too bad. I could get rid of him easily, it’s just better that he picks on me than someone else.” Oh, the self-sacrificing ways of a superhero. 

“Has he ever gotten physical?”

“No. He just teases me, calls me names.”

“Like what?” Peter shrugged. “ Peter .”

“Like, um, Penis Parker.” He barely whispered the last two words. 

“And he knows that you’re trans?” Tony was seething. 

“Yeah, he met me before I transitioned.”

“I’m gonna kill him.”

“What? No! Don’t!” 

“Why the hell not, Pete? He’s been making transphobic comments about my kid for years! He has no right to do that!” Tony raged, waving the arm that wasn’t around Peter. 

“Alright, okay, calm down. I know he’s an ass, but you can’t kill a kid, Mr. Stark.”

“Fine. But you can bet he isn’t getting into any colleges. Or jobs. He’s going to be penniless and on the streets by the time I’m done with him.”

“Mister Stark, you can’t ruin his life! He’s a bully, but he’s still just a kid. Kids make mistakes.”

“Then what do you propose I do?”

“Send a letter to the principle requiring that he be expelled for transphobia and bullying?”

“That’s… not a bad idea. Wow, kid, didn’t think you’d have it in you.” Tony grinned down at him.

“Like I said, he’s an ass.”

“Okay, I’ll be doing that. And Peter, do you want me to cancel this trip? Because I can, and I will if you want me to. I really don’t want to make you uncomfortable, and if this isn’t a good idea--”

“No, it’s okay,” Peter cut him off, “Don’t cancel it. The rest of the team shouldn’t have this taken away just because I live here. But do you think you could tell the other Avengers not to come anywhere near us? And maybe pretend I’m just your personal intern, not your adopted son?” Peter clapped his hand over his mouth and looked up with wide eyes. He obviously hadn’t meant to let that slip out. 

“Adopted son,” Tony said slowly, pondering. “You know, I like the sound of that.”

“Really?” Peter squeaked.

“I think so. How about it? If I can convince May, would you be open to me adopting you once you graduate?” Peter looked as though he couldn’t say another word. Instead he nodded his head so fast that Tony was sure he got whiplash. “Yeah, I think I’d like that too, kiddo. So, you think you can handle the field trip? If you ever need to back out, I can make it go away.”

“No, I think I can do it.” Peter nodded and looked more confident. 

“Good. And remember, you got this Travis!” Tony said in a funny accent.

“Make ‘em wait for it,” Peter grinned at him, mood lightened by the familiar reference they used to pump each other up.

“ Boom!” They both erupted into giggles. 

“Thank you Mister Stark,” Peter said with a quiet smile once they had both calmed down. 

“Of course, Peter. Now, I think we need a movie night. Why don’t you go get changed into your pjs--remember to take off your binder--and I’ll grab the hot cocoa and blankets.”

“Breakfast Club?”

“Sure thing, kiddo.” Tony smiled at him as he got up, grabbed his favorite Ironman pajamas, and headed into the bathroom. 

Fifteen minutes later, the pair were curled up on the couch, Peter once again in Tony’s lap. Peter took a sip of his perfectly warmed cocoa, then wordlessly handed it to Tony, who put it on the table for him. He rested his head on the man’s collarbone and started drifting towards sleep.

“Thank you, dad,” he whispered, “I love you.”

“I love you too, Pete. So much.” Tony leaned down and dropped a kiss on the crown of his head. 

Dad . He definitely liked the sound of that. 

Art For Chapter 2

Chapter Text

“Ok Pete, are you ready?” Tony asked.

“Yeah, I think I am,” Peter said with confidence. It had been a month since the field trip was announced, and things had gotten a lot better since. Firstly, after his talk with Mr. Stark, they were officially unofficially father and son. Peter had even begun regularly calling him “dad.” It felt amazing.

Secondly, his self-consciousness had gotten a lot better. After he admitted everything to Tony, his dad had made sure to always be clear about just how much he cared for his kid. He’d also finally told his therapist about all the horrible thoughts he’d been having, and she had really helped him work on them. Not that they went away completely. There were always still there, in the back of his mind, but he was better now. 

 And finally, Tony and Peter had taken time to talk about exactly what was going to happen on the field trip. They went over everything, and were positive that there wouldn’t be any funny business. All the Avengers who lived in the tower--save Nat and Bucky, who they trusted not to accidentally out Peter--were conveniently away on a business trip. Tony was there, and would be stopping by as to prove the rumors Flash had spread wrong (and possibly scare the pants off the kid), but would not reveal that he and Peter were anything more than intern and employer. 

“Good. I’m proud of you kid, but remember--even this late in the game--give me the word and I can make it go away, no questions.” They were currently in the elevator, heading towards the parking garage where Happy waited with the car. The field trip would take Peter right back home, but he couldn’t give any indication that he actually lived there. 

“I know, you’ve told me. I promise, dad, I can do this.”

“I know you can , bambino, but that doesn’t mean you have to.” He pulled Peter against him in a one armed hug. Peter immediately buried his face in Tony’s chest, like he was prone to do. 

“I want to. I told you, my team deserves this chance. And who knows, it might actually turn out fun,” he grinned up at Tony.

“Fun?”

“Just think about Flash’s face when he finds out I actually work here.” Tony barked out a laugh. 

“Yeah, you’re right, kid. We wouldn’t want to deprive the world of a horror-struck teenager who just realized he’d been bullying Tony Stark’s personal intern.”

“The size of your head astounds me,” Peter led Tony out of the elevator. “And we both know he won’t even pause to think about what he did. The second he finds out I actually have an internship, he’s just going to ask you for one himself.”

“We both know how that’s going to go,” Tony growled.

“You promised you wouldn’t kill him!”

“I’m not going to!” Tony exclaimed. Then much quieter he mumbled: “Some light maiming on the other hand.”

“ Dad !” 

“Get in the car, Pete. Won’t want you to be late.”

“I am literally coming right home.”

“Yes, yes you are. Now go.” Peter reluctantly slid into the backseat, and Happy pulled out. Peter looked back to see Tony watching them go. He had a smile on his face, but his eyebrows were pinched in a way that screamed “I’m super worried about my poor anxious spider-child.” 

He tried not to think about that, and instead focused on the day ahead of him. This could either go well or horribly, horribly wrong. 

“Peter! Peter! Right here!” Ned calls out, pointing to a spot next to him he’d obviously been saving for his friend. Peter trudged down the aisle and plopped into the musty smelling seat.

“Can you believe it? Stark Tower! The Avengers! Tony flipping Stark! I mean I know of course you can believe it you go there every day and you live there, but for a poor mortal like me this is the opportunity of a lifetime! I’m soooo excited!”He paused and took in the look on Peter’s face. “Peter? Hey are you ok, man? I mean of course you’re not i saw you in the hall yesterday but other than that what-” 

Peter groaned and slid down in his seat, interrupting Ned mid sentence. He mumbled something, causing Ned to strain to hear his friend over the chatter of the crowded bus. Peter heard Ned mutter “ What the hell did he just say? ” under his breath. He sighed and spoke up. 

“I’m worried something will go wrong. Knowing me, it probably will, no doubt about it. I’m just sick and tired of knowing things won’t go my way.” Ned stilled, forgetting all about his excitement in worry for his friend. 

“Peter-”

“Hey Penis! How do you feel knowing your entire lie is going to be revealed? I would think this entire trip was pointless, but now I could see you cry knowing you finally realize you’re a pathetic loser trying to be cool. I mean, why do you think my parents are paying for it?” Flash appeared behind them, his voice jarring and harsh in Peter’s ears. 

“Fuck off, Flash,” MJ snarled from her semi-quiet spot a few rows behind the boys. It looked like she had a book in her hand, but hadn’t made much progress. Not paying any mind to MJ, Flash threw something at the back of Peter’s head. Peter forced himself not to duck even after his spidey-senses went haywire. It was pointless, Flash would just keep trying. After a sharp pain, Peter saw a dull pencil fall into his lap. Pointless? Dull pencil? The irony. Flash grinned and turned to walk back to his friends, obviously pleased that he had hurt Peter. Peter turned back to Ned, waving a hand in Flash’s direction.

“Exhibit Number A of how things can go wrong. This dumbass who always makes my life-”

“Ummmm Peter? Sorry to interrupt,” Ned snorted. “But Exhibit Number A? Really? Who are you and what did you do to my friend who can count and spell?” Peter sighed burying his face in his hands, but soon an uncontrollable chuckle rose from him as well. He let himself giggle and laugh with Ned about dumb jokes all the way to the tower.

Fifteen minutes later, the bus pulled to a stop. Everyone rushed to look out the window. Gasps at the tower’s brilliance were heard all around the bus, but it’s effect had worn off on Peter by now. Don’t get him wrong, it’s incredible, but he wasn’t really tempted to fawn over the thing anymore. 

Mr. Harrington called for their attention and directed them all off the bus. Save from one attempted tripping that Peter had to pretend he barely missed, no one had really bothered him yet. 

All the students stood in the small courtyard in front of the entrance as their teacher went to get permission to go inside. 

Peter looked around; nearly everyone had their heads tilted so far back he was sure they’d get cricks in their necks. 

“ Woah !” Ned’s eyes look half ready to pop out of their sockets.

“Cool, I guess.” MJ mutters. Ned shot her an admonishing look before Mr. Harrington was back to lead them into the lobby. Anyone who thought herding cats was hard obviously hadn’t tried to get a group of starstruck teenage nerds into a science filled building. However, before he brought them inside, he dragged Peter a few feet away and began talking to him in a hushed voice.

“Listen, Pete, I need to talk to you.”

“What is it?” he asked, worried that something had gone wrong with the trip.

“Well, it’s about this internship you’ve been telling people about. Peter, I’ve done some research. Stark Industries doesn’t accept any interns below college-age. It would be a lot better for everyone if you admitted you made a mistake. We can’t have you still lying about it when we’re actually touring the place. I’m sorry, Pete.” He did look sympathetic, but that really didn’t matter to Peter. 

He understood his classmates not believing him. Flash had spread that rumor well, so it made sense that they believed the popular bully, not the nerdy quiet kid who always disappeared for weird reasons. But his teacher? Weren’t they supposed to be trustworthy? He liked Mr. Harrington, and it hurt that even one of his favorite teachers assumed he was lying. 

Peter just nodded mutely, sick to his stomach. Mr. Harrington clapped him on the back and led the way back to the class. He showed them through the front doors, and Peter lost his train of thought for a moment at the sight that was Stark Tower. 

The rest of the team made astonished and awed noises as they slowly made their way through the main lobby. Peter had to admit, it was incredible.

Floors with golden inlay, walls so high you can barely see the top, shield agents and scientists running around everywhere, and several displays of the newest tech made the lobby truly an amazing place. Just wait until they see the rest of it , Peter though.

He was currently staring up at the ceiling in awe. Despite how many times he came here, he was rarely in the lobby. There was metal art hanging from the ceiling that looked and moved like waves via hundreds of wires. So cool . 

“Peter! Pssssst, Peter! Peter, Peter, Peter!” Peter looks around, trying to determine where the mystery sound came from then hears it again. “I’m on your shoulder!” Oh no. That could only mean one thing.

“Mr. Scott! What are you doing here? On my shoulder ?”

“I wanted to check on you. And it’s just Scott, the ‘Mr.’ makes me feel as old as Cap. Your dad’s been freaking out all morning waiting for you, so Natasha sent me to check in and report back, so you-know-who didn’t blow something up.” Peter groaned. 

“He blows stuff up for fun Mr. Scott. I don’t think him being nervous about me is going to change the DER.” Pepper had instigated the DER--or Daily Explosion Rate -- after Tony had managed to blow up thirty different things in one day. 

Obviously you weren’t here this morning.” Scott’s voice sounded haunted. God, Peter really hoped his dad hadn’t beaten the record. 

“Ok, then tell Nat and Dad I’m perfectly fine, there’s nothing to worry about, and I should be seeing Dad soon.”

“Done. In the meantime I’m bored, so you get the pleasure of listening about the newest Pym Particles.” He started rambling some very interesting science in Peter’s ear. 

“Dude, Peter, is something wrong?” Ned asked. Oops.  It obviously looked like Peter was talking to himself.

“Oh shit, yeah. Scott, you know, Ant-Man, is on my shoulder and apparently you-know-who sent Scott down to check on me.”

“Language,” Scott said.

“Shut up,” he whispered back harshly. 

“Dude,” Ned stared at him, astonished. “A superhero shrunk himself and came downstairs just to check on you ?”

“Um, yeah?” Peter shrugged without thinking about it.

“Whoa, kid!” Scott yelled into his ear as Peter felt a sharp pinch on his earlobe, “Watch the shoulders!”

“Oh, right sorry, Mr. Scott!” Peter said sheepishly, “Could you maybe… go now? Not that I don’t like learning about the particles, but people will think I’m talking to myself and stuff.”

“Right, right. Off I go then. Bye Peter!” Peter felt the small weight disappear from his shoulder, but he had no idea where Scott had gone. Just hopefully not on the bottom of one of his classmates’ shoes. 

Peter glanced around the room once more, then caught sight of Lillian, one of the interns, standing next to Dorice, his favorite secretary. When they looked over at him, Peter raised his hand to wave at them. Flash glanced his way right as Dorice responded with a cheerfully blown kiss.

“Really, Penis?” He sneered, “That’s the best you can come up with? Waving at some secretary who doesn’t even respond to you? You’re really going to have to try harder to convince people you work here.” Peter just ignored him in favor of panicking at the tour guide currently walking towards them, who was none other than Lillian, one of the few people here he was actually friends with. 

“Hello everyone,” she said, “My name is Lillian, and don’t ask for my number since I don’t go out with children. My pronouns are she/her and I don’t tolerate any type of verbal or physical bullying. If I catch you doing either of those or just being a dumbass in general I will not hesitate to throw you against the nearest wall, record it, post it on every social media platform available, tag you, and laugh my ass off the entire time.” Peter was fairly worried. This was not the normal speech Lillian gave while touring, which only meant that she had heard the Flash stories. That wasn’t good. “Seeing as that topic is settled now I need to give everyone your badges.” She reached into the large while bin in her arms and pulled out the first badge she got her hand on. “Ned Leeds,” she called out. Peter’s friend rushed forward to retrieve his badge. It was white, with his name, access level, and some kind of barcode on it. 

Peter had started out with a badge--granted, with much higher clearance--but once he had accepted Tony’s offer to become an Avenger, he had been upgraded to a level where he didn’t need one. Lillian continued to hand out badges until the only person left without one was Peter. Somehow, nobody noticed. 

“Excuse me, ma’am,” Abe said, “Why does my badge say ‘Omega’ on it?”

“Good question. That’s your access level. Omega is the lowest level, for tour groups, visitors, and the press. Anyone with Omega level needs someone with a higher level badge to grant them access. The highest is Alpha, which is for Mr. Stark, Ms. Potts, and the Avengers who live in the tower. They don’t actually have badges, FRIDAY scans their biometrics. Next is Beta, which is for non-live in Avengers, very high-up officials, and the most important scientists. After that is Gamma, which is for the average scientists and tower officials. Then Delta, which is for interns and certain management staff. I’m Delta, because when I’m not giving tours I work in one of the R&D labs. Finally, there’s Epsilon, which is about the same level of access as Omega, but with different rules and places allowed. That is for secretaries and cleaning staff.” She gave a quick grin before looking over at their teacher. 

“Has everyone got a badge?” Mr. Harrington looked out over all of them. The class nodded, and Peter felt no need to speak up. Mr. Harrington would probably just chastise him and make a big deal out of something being exactly the way it was supposed to. 

“Ok then, let me show you through the security check,” Lillian said. She waved them towards an area in between the entrance and the rest of the lobby, complete with metal detectors and badge scanners. “Everyone needs to scan their badge then step through the metal detector, where Mr. Stark’s AI, FRIDAY, will announce you.”

Shit . For everyone else, it would be an automated response. “Mr. Harrington, Omega level,” and all that. However, FRIDAY was programmed to recognise and greet anyone with Alpha access. Mr. Harrington went first, and the rest of the class followed close behind him. Somehow, Peter managed to be second to last in line. 

Once everyone passed through the metal detector, they thankfully moved out of hearing distance to make room for the next person in line. Therefore, the only person to hear Peter pass through was the one behind him. Unfortunately, that person was Flash.

Unlike with everyone else, FRIDAY’s voice was cheerful and more human sounding when Peter came through.

“Peter Parker, Alpha level access. Hello, BabyStark! Would you like me to alert ‘the Holt to your Peralta’ that you have arrived?” Peter groaned and dropped his face into his hand. It was a mistake to introduce the Avengers to Brooklyn 99. 

“What the hell was that, Penis?” Flash snarled as he passed through behind Peter, “Did you hack the fucking AI to keep your lie going? You really thought giving yourself that high of an access level would make it more believable? Only an idiot would make someone like you that powerful.”

Peter was trying to come up with a retort, but Lillian called them over before he could. 

“Ok, first we’re going to go to one of the Research and Development labs. It isn’t the one where I work, but several of my friends are there.”

The whole group followed her onto the elevator, which began playing music. Now, this was a pretty normal thing to happen in an elevator. However, Stark Industries’ elevators were notorious--at least among the Avengers--for not playing music unless requested. This could be very fun, especially when pranking the Avengers. Peter had an entire compilation of security feeds where he suddenly made FRIDAY blare different songs when various heroes were in the elevators. 

All in all, Peter was very confused when the stereotypical elevator music began playing. That is, until he was situated right between Ned and MJ, right behind Lillian, and right in front of Flash. The music increased the already awkward situation ten-fold, and Peter was tempted to question FRIDAY about just who made the music start playing. His bet was on Tony, of course, but he wouldn’t put it past the AI herself. She had a pranking side, despite what you would think. 

He sighed and listened to the inconceivably boring music. This trip was going wonderfully . 

Art For Chapter 3

Chapter Text

Finally, after it felt like FRIDAY intentionally slowed down the ride up just to make it more uncomfortable, the doors dinged open and the team exited the elevator. 

“Woah,” Cindy said and was echoed by at least three other people. Peter had to admit, he felt the same way when he saw the labs for the first time. With sterile white walls, blue lit tables, holograms hovering all around, various projects scattered about, and real life scientists complete with crazy hair, lab coats, and protection goggles, the place was practically futuristic. 

“Alright everybody,” Lillian caught their attention with her slight southern accent after giving them a moment to fawn over the tech. “Welcome to the Research and Development labs. This is where Gamma and some Beta level scientists work, as well as their interns. As you can see, this lab is primarily working on the newest StarkPhone, which will be released next November.” True to her word, there were several bits of hardware and one nearly finished phone sitting out on the tables. 

At the sound of her voice, several of the weary interns glanced their way. Four in particular of them perked up at the sight of Peter. 

“Hey--” Xander called out, but they were cut off by the terrified look on the normally energetic boy’s face. He frantically mimed a cutting motioned at his neck and gestured at the class standing in front of him. The interns looked at him in confusion before Dylan gasped in realization and whispered in their and Katie’s ear. Xander’s eyes widened almost comically as they leaned over to whisper what Peter assumed was the same message to the final intern, Caroline, who looked just as shocked. 

“Are you all okay?” asked Lillian, looking at her friends all like they were insane. It must have looked pretty strange; all the interns looking up, getting excited, faltering, looking confused, gasping, whispering, then bouncing on their feet in excitement. Though, to be fair, the R&D interns could be a little nuts. Setting things on fire quite literally came with their job. 

“Uh, yeah, we’re cool. Cool cool cool cool cool cool. No doubt, no doubt, no doubt.” Dylan tried to play off his awkwardness with an equally awkward B99 reference. Peter nearly smacked his head in frustration. Why did it have to be these four?

“Yeah, ok,” Lillian said and rolled her eyes. “Anyway, kids, this is the lab. You can take a few minutes to look around, but if you touch anything, you might die. Not that I’d kill you, but many of the products in this room might.” She smiled a decidedly evil grin and left the kids to look around. They stared at her in shock for a moment before beginning to move, most with their hands clutched tightly to their chests. Peter was reminded of why he liked Lillian so much.

“You do know that none of this stuff is remotely dangerous, right?” He muttered to her as he joined her leaning against a wall.

“Yup,” she drew out the syllable. 

“So you did that…”

“Just to scare a bunch of wimpy highschoolers? Absolutely.” Peter threw his head back and laughed, earning a few looks from students and a hurried wave from Mr. Harrington, indicating he had to look around the lab he knew inside and out. 

Barely a few months ago, Peter hadn’t known anyone in the Tower. Hell, almost nobody knew he existed. Then there had been an incident involving a snobby scientist who didn’t believe he had clearance to be in one of Tony’s labs, some rough manhandling to get him out of the lab, resulting in said scientist getting fired for laying a hand on “ My goddamn kid! ” according to Tony, and it was decided that Peter should get to know some people. 

Thus, Peter had been introduced to the R&D interns, or “Lab Rats,” as they liked to call themselves. It consisted of Dylan (He/Him), Katie (She/Her), Xander (He/They), and Caroline (She/Her). They were all college-age students, and Peter had made fast friends with them. Despite him being younger than the group, he was just as smart as--if not smarter than--all of them, so they accepted him immediately. They even affectionately nicknamed him the “Lab Mouse,” since apparently he was just too cute to be a rat. Peter didn’t know how he felt about that. 

The group was known for their shenanigans, and with Peter in the mix, it just got worse. Only last week they had employed Shuri’s help in making FRIDAY display the “We shot him in ze legs,” Vine whenever Cap picked up his shield. Bucky, who Peter had properly educated in the world of Vine, cracked up every time. Steve just looked confused. 

Of course, this meant Peter was always working in the R&D lab, so it was hard for them to go against their instincts to ask him for help. Several times one of them would look up, spot him, start to call out, and then dejectedly drop their head again. Peter made an attempt to sneak by and take a quick look a couple of times, but it was hard not to interact with them like normal. 

“Okay, everyone!” Lillian called out after a few minutes of exploring, “We’re going to head out now. But first, does anyone have any questions?” Nearly every hand shot up. “You,” she said, pointing to Abe. 

“What other projects is Stark Industries working on right now?” 

“Do any of you want to take this one?” She shot a glance back at the interns, who had stood up when the class readied to leave. 

“Sure!” Katie said in the perky voice she used for tour groups that almost disobeyed the laws of nature. “Our group is working on the new StarkPhone, as you know. Tony Stark, his personal intern, and a select few others are constantly upgrading the Avengers’ tech, of course. We also have projects that focus on making completely clean engines, reducing plastic waste, and healing the ozone layer as part of Mr. Stark’s new climate change oriented initiative. But there are always hundreds of projects happening in the tower; those are just some of the main ones. You can always visit the SI website if you want more information.” 

“Thanks, Katie,” Lillian said, “You.” She pointed at Betty this time. 

“How many Stark Industries scientists are there?”

“World wide? About 160,000,” Lillian answered this time. “Yeah, you?” And low and behold, she had pointed at Flash. 

“Yeah, uh, I have a question about the internships here,” he smirked, but Lillian had heard stories from Peter about certain classmates, and she obviously suspected him of being one of them. She was not amused. 

“Then ask it.”

“Right. Are high schoolers allowed to intern here?” She rolled her eyes and glanced at Peter for permission. He nodded. 

“In the last twenty years of Stark Industries, there has only been one high school intern--”

“Ha! See, Penis! I knew you were lying!” Flash turned to jeer at Peter, who just sighed and propped his head up with his palm. You really didn’t want to piss off Lillian. 

“Excuse me!” Lillian said sharply, “If you would let me finish! I was saying: there has only been one high school intern, and that intern is Peter Parker.” 

The entire class, including Mr. Harrington, paled as one and looked at Peter. Well, almost everyone. Ned looked like he was about to pee his pants in excitement, and MJ seemed to be staring, dazed, and Lillian’s cold face. 

“ What ?!” Flash’s voice was strangled. 

“I literally told you, Flash! All of you! Did no one believe me?” Peter looked around at his classmate’s and teacher’s faces.

“I believed you,” Ned said wearily and feebly raised his hand.

“Ned you’ve been here, you’re like best friends with Xander. Of course you believed me.” His friend just nodded sadly. The interns had just been staring stupidly, but at the sound of his name, Xander jerked into action.

“Hold on,” they said, “You’re telling me that nobody--including your teacher --believed that you had an internship here?” 

“I know,” Peter said, exasperated. 

“Seriously?”

“ I know !” 

“God, Peter. I’m so sorry ,” Mr. Harrington said after a tense moment, “You told us, you were honest, and we just believed what Flash was saying. I mean, I gave you that whole speech downstairs and you never once…” he trailed off, looking dejected. 

“No, it’s okay, Mr. Harrington,” Peter said, kind as always, “It’s a little hard to believe. Like Lillian said, I’m the youngest intern here in twenty years. But, I mean, you all know now so it’s cool.” He shrugged. 

The class was staring at him in awe, except for Flash, who chose to glare at him instead. MJ had finally dragged her eyes away from Lillian and was now rolling her eyes at Peter’s awkwardness. 

“Um, does anyone want to ask me any questions?” He said after they just kept staring at him. It was getting creepy. 

“Do you know the Avengers?” Cindy asked. MJ snorted and Peter glared at her. 

“Yeah, I’ve met them. We’re not very close though.” He laughed internally. He’d double french braid the Winter Soldier’s hair last week, and Black Widow called him “Baby Spider” in Russian. Totally not close. 

“Where do you work?” asked Abe. 

“Um, I’m Mr. Stark’s personal intern, so everywhere he does. That’s why I have such high clearance.” More gasps. 

“Mr. Stark has a personal intern? And it’s you ?” someone in the crowd asked. Peter didn’t see who. 

“Yeah, I am. If any of you had bothered to believe me and ask me what exactly I did, instead of asking me if the job was actually real, then you would know that already.” Peter hadn't meant to be rude like that, but he was incredibly annoyed with all of them. There were mumbled apologies from most of them. 

“Okay, not that this little reveal hasn’t been just touching, but if we want to get on with the tour, we need to get some lunch into you. Everyone: back in the elevator, we’ll be going to the food court on floor seventeen.” Lillian herded the students back into the elevator, complete with the same awkward music FRIDAY seemed to be providing. 

“So that went well,” MJ muttered next to him.

“You can say that again,” Lillian said. 

“Agreed. At least they know now, right?” Peter asked hesitantly. 

“I mean, yeah. It might shut Flash up,” MJ sneered at the boy on the other side of the elevator. His face was so pale he nearly looked green. 

“Flash the asshole who calls him Penis?”

“Yeah.”

“Anything we can do?”

“Let’s talk about it over lunch,” MJ smirked at her across Peter. 

Dammit they went from worrying about me to flirting in three seconds flat. Really? 

The elevator dinged. 

“Alright everyone!” Lillian called and finally looked away from MJ. “Welcome to one of the three foodcourts in Stark Tower. Originally, Mr. Stark added one because it took far too much time and hassle for his employees to leave and get food out of the building. Then there were two, and now three. This is the one most commonly visited by lab workers, as well as tour groups. You have all been provided a meal voucher, so you only need to scan your badges at any restaurant you like and pick what you want. Sit anywhere, but meet back right here in an hour. Got it?” Everyone nodded. “Alright, go ahead.” All the kids rushed off in various directions. Peter, Ned, and MJ hung back with Lillian. 

“Okay, I normally go almost everywhere, but what do you all want?” he said. 

“Pizza?” Ned offered. 

“Al is pretty nice, I’m down.”

“Same,” MJ said.

“Why not?” Lillian nodded to them. The four headed to the left and Al’s Pizza came into view. Peter had actually helped Mr. Stark design this food court, and as such, it was his favorite. They had made sure to hire all local businesses for this level, and Peter loved interacting with all of them. He’d even gotten Delmar’s shop a place here. 

They ordered their pizza, Peter chatted with Al for a few minutes, then they went and snagged a table. A few moments later, the runner for Al’s came over with their two large cheese pizzas. Sally was one of Peter’s favorite workers here. She was middle-aged, red headed, and bore a slight resemblance to Molly Weasley. She looked at the anxiety on Peter’s face, the mere couple of pizzas on the table, and his strange company, and immediately went into mother hen mode. 

“Peter Parker!” she said, “What the hell is up with you today?”

“Wha-what do you mean?” he stammered. 

“You didn’t come down here for breakfast, you looked like someone just kicked your freaking puppy, and now you’ve only ordered two pizzas and it turns out you’re sharing them? Are you dying or something?” He just looked at her, shocked. Pepper had made breakfast this morning, and he had eaten with her, Tony, and May for moral support. 

“I don’t… think so?”

“Then what’s wrong with you?”

“Nothing, I’m okay. We’re just on a school trip and I don’t want to draw attention to myself.” He cringed. 

“Now Peter, there’s no need to deprive yourself of what you need to eat just because your school friends are around,” her voice oozed motherly-ness. Peter really loved Sally. 

“I wouldn’t really call them friends ,” Lillian muttered under her breath. 

“What was that, dear?”

“Nothing,” Peter said quickly for her, “We’re all good. If I’m still hungry I’ll come get more food, okay?”

“You’d better,” she brightened, “Alright, have a good time kids!” She waved and returned to the restaurant. 

“What was she talking about you not getting enough food?” MJ asked bluntly.

“You know how I always eat a ton at lunch?” 

“Yeah,” Ned nodded. 

“That’s me cutting back.”

“ Dude !” he exclaimed, “How fast is your metabolism?”

“We don’t really know, actually. Da--Mr. Stark and I are still testing that out.” 

“Peter?” MJ asked, suddenly soft.

“Yeah?”

“Did you just cut off saying ‘Dad’ and replace it with Mr. Stark?” His face turned beet red.

“... No?”

“You did !” she exclaimed, “Do you think of him as your father Peter?” Peter looked down, thought it over, then just decided to hell with it all. That seemed like a pretty common mood for him lately. 

“Not so much as I think of him that way as he is .” He looked up at his friend.

“Peter. Please don’t tell me Tony Stark is your biological father and you’ve never told me,” Ned stared at him with wide eyes. 

“What? No! Not biological at all. But, uh, he may have mentioned, um, adoption papers?” 

“WHAT?” Ned shrieked, earning a few glares from the scientists sitting nearby. “I’m sorry, just. He’s adopting you?” Even Lillian and MJ stared at him with wide, shocked eyes. 

“Yeah, once I graduate. I mean, he’ll only really be my legal guardian for a couple months, but it’s the fact that I’ll officially be his kid, you know? Pepper says that if I’m ready we can like, announce my relationship with him through a press conference once I’m out of high school.” Peter gave a small smile. Even the thought of legally being Tony’s son made him immensely happy.

“Dude, that is so cool ! My best friend’s dad is Tony freaking Stark! I might faint!” Ned did look a little scarily pale. 

“Peter, how many people know?” Lillian asked. 

“Um… Me. Tony, obviously. Pepper, May, Bruce, and Nat also know, and now I think Scott does too somehow? Natasha might have told Bucky, they're best friends and I told her she could. And I think Tony had to tell his lawyer or something. Other than that, just you guys. And, uh, please keep it that way? We don’t want the word to get out until we’re ready.”

“Of course, Parker,” MJ said, “Our lips are sealed. Right, Ned?” His friend just nodded mutely, seemingly at a loss for words. “That was certainly a special way to reveal things, Pete. Now, I want dessert. Lillian?”

“I’ll come with you, I know a cool pastry shop we should check out.” MJ flushed slightly. It was the first time Peter had ever seen her flustered. The two girls stood and walked off towards the supposed bakery, laughing all the way. 

“So, is anything going to change once you--” Ned was cut off by one Flash Thompson slipping in between them, slapping his tray down on the table. Somehow he managed to do even that arrogantly. 

“What do you want, Flash?” Peter sighed. 

“I want many things in life, Penis. Right now, I want you to tell me how you pulled that off. What, did you bribe the tour guide? Hack the AI? Do some favors to get yourself in here for the day? Tell me, Penis, just how many people did you have to blow to be sitting here?”

“Go away, Flash.”

“You know, I don’t think I will. You know why?”

“I’m sure you’re going to tell me.”

“Because I can do whatever I want here. I’m the reason we’re all on this trip, so I make the rules. And trust me, Penis, I’m going to prove that you’re just a sad loser who can’t do shit. You can’t make it to practices, you can’t get a real internship. Hell, you can’t even be a real boy.” Ned practically growled beside Peter, two seconds away from punching Flash, no matter how much stronger he was. 

“I suggest you leave right now , or I will have you permanently thrown off the campus for violating this company’s very clear bully policy. Namely: We don’t like or respect assholes, and are perfectly happy to throw them back out to their sad little lives,” Lillian’s menacing and firm tone sounded from behind Flash. Both her and MJ were fixing him with glares so strong that Peter was surprised he didn’t shit his pants then and there. He did, however, pale like a ghost and scurry back to his own table.

“You alright?” MJ asked him.

“I’m fine. I’m used to it.”

“You shouldn’t have to be.”

“You know, Mr. Stark said that too. But what else am I supposed to do? Let him bully someone else?”

“Peter,” Lillian said calmly, “Mr. Stark could easily get him expelled for bullying and transphobia.”

“Yeah, we’ve talked about it. He’s all for it, but I’d rather not ruin his life, you know? He’s just a kid. Anway, I think Mr. Stark might just be looking for some good ammunition. The security feeds from today might be that.”

“Good,” Ned grumbled, “He deserves it. He shouldn’t be allowed to keep doing this.” 

“I know. But we can’t deal with that today. For now, let’s just get through the tour?” Peter placated them.

“Speaking of, five minutes until we’re supposed to meet. I’d better head over to the elevator,” Lillian said and glanced at her watch. 

“What happened to your dessert?” Peter asked.

“We saw Flash over here and decided against it,” explained MJ.

“Thank you,” he said quietly.

“Of course, Peter. You’re our friend,” Lillian’s voice was warm. “Now, want to join me?” The highschoolers agreed to come with her, so they all threw away their trash and headed towards the meetup spot. 

Ten minutes later, everyone was gathered around Lillian once more. A couple kids, including Flash and MJ, were looking at their phones, as the food court was the only place they were allowed, but everyone else was listening raptly to her instructions. 

“Alright everyone, next we will be going to--” she halted as Peter’s phone went off very loudly. What the hell? I never have it off vibrate! Why would anyone be calling me--

Then he heard the ringtone. That stupid, stupid ringtone. 

“ You are my dad! You’re my dad! Boogie woogie woogie! ” Shit . Peter fished the phone out of his pocket and answered. 

“Yeah?” his voice shook. His class eyed him with interest. Nearly everyone there knew that his dad was, in fact, dead. 

“Hey kid,” Tony said, “You’re on seventeen, right?”

“Yeah, but--”

“Good, ‘cause I’m headed your way. Actually I see you right now. Turn around, kiddo.” Peter paled as he slowly turned around. There stood Tony Stark, waving at Peter and his class. He removed the phone from his ear and ended the call. Peter dropped his own phone. 

He walked over and lightly clapped Peter on the back in greeting. Normally it would be a hug, but today was certainly not normal. 

“Hang on,” Betty said and shook the rest of them out of their Stark-induced stupor. “That was you on the phone with Peter?”

“It was,” Tony grinned as he said so. He was obviously proud to impress Peter’s friends. Peter, however, felt a looming sense of doom at the back of his neck. 

“And that was his ringtone for you?”

“His ringt--” Tony started before freezing. He obviously remembered. Barely a week before, Peter had lost his phone. Tony offered to call it, and before Peter could stop him, that song was playing through the penthouse from beneath the couch. Peter nearly hyperventilated, but Tony had just wrapped him up in his arms and said he loved it. Peter had, of course, never even thought of changing his ring tone. Now that was coming back to haunt him. 

“Shit.” 

Art For Chapter 4

Chapter Text

The ringtone.

Tony.

His dad.

His class.

Oh no.

Peter stared at his dumbstruck class and felt himself slipping into a panic attack. His dad was frozen, realizing what had just happened. Lillian, Ned, and MJ looked just as shocked and scared for his secret to be revealed. Everyone else stood there, staring. Finally, Tony spoke.

“Er, just so you know, in regards to the ringtone, I’m not actually Peter’s dad. He’s my personal intern, so we have inside jokes and stuff, and that’s… one of them. I’m, um, in no way related to Peter Parker. He just works for me. You know. Like an intern.” Peter couldn’t tell if his class believed him. If he were in their shoes, he wouldn’t. 

Oh, god. Now they’re really going to find out. Peter felt his breath quicken. His heart rate spiked. His hands shook. He imagined he could see his classmates faces when they found out. Most of them awed, already planning how to make themselves friends with him, even if they’d barely spoken before. Some disgusted that Peter could ever associate himself with that weapons dealer who had a hand in destroying New York a few years ago.

 Flash probably wouldn’t even look at him. He would stare at Tony, with hate in his eyes. How could the man he honored so much adopt that annoying kid who lied about his internship and always managed to show Flash up? He would probably sneer at the disgusting thought of someone as worthless as Peter being related to Tony Stark. 

“Mr. Stark?” Lillian spoke up, obviously trying to take the focus off of a terrified Peter, “We need to continue our tour. Of course, you can come with us, but we have to get moving if we want to finish in time.”

“Of course, Lillian. I’m sorry. Please, go ahead. I need to speak with Peter here for a moment, but we’ll catch up with you all.” Tony nodded at her. The class finally started moving after some encouragement from Lillian and Mr. Harrington. The second they entered the elevator, Tony rounded on Peter with concern mapped across his face. 

“Hey, Pete? Peter, look at me,” Mr. Stark was suddenly in front of him. He reached his hands up, setting them on Peter’s shoulders. 

“Dad?” he said quietly, still unmoving, “Do they--do they know?” 

“No, bambino, they don’t. It’s okay, I told them you were my intern.”  Peter knew he told them he was his intern. He was there. That didn’t mean they believed him. Tony pulled him behind an outcropping wall, away from the prying eyes of the cafeteria.

“G-good.” Peter gave a jerky nod of his head. Maybe Tony was right. Please let Tony be right.

“Are you okay, Underoos?” 

“I--uh--I don’t know?” Peter looked up at his dad with scared eyes. This whole day had taken its toll on him. 

No matter what he said, how much he pretended, Peter’s soul was still scarred. He’d lost his parents at a young age. He’d gone through gender transition in high school, complete with bullies and transphobes. He’d lost his uncle not long after that. He’d become a superhero, nearly lost his life so many times, and developed severe anxiety and depression. Because of all that, days like this hit a whole lot harder. So no. He wasn’t okay. He was very rarely okay. 

“Alright, okay, Pete. I know. Do you want to go back upstairs to the penthouse?” Tony rested a comforting hand on the back of his neck. Peter leaned into the touch. 

“What would we tell my class?” That he went home? That he actually was the infamous Tony Stark’s son, and he actually lived here because the Avengers were his family? That he had a minor panic attack because the class heard his freaking ringtone of all things? 

“That I wanted you to work on a project for me?”

“Mr. Harrington would say I have to come back to school.”

“I could talk him out of that, Pete. I’m Ironman.” 

“No, no. We can go back to the tour. I’m good. I’m fine.” Peter lied. He nodded decisively, choosing to ignore the twisting feeling in his gut. 

“Are you sure, buddy?” 

“Y-yeah. I’ll, uh, tell you if I need to go.”

“Good. The second you need to leave, I’ll get you out of there.” Tony tugged him against his chest in a hug and ran his fingers through Peter’s hair. 

“Thank you,” he whispered.

“Of course, Pete. Do you want a fidget?” Tony had taken to carrying around various fidget toys once he found out how much playing with them helped Peter in a panic attack. Peter nodded, and Tony fished a cube out of his suit pocket. The sight of Tony Stark, crouched behind a wall, holding out a fidget cube to his son made Peter giggle. 

“What’s so funny, kiddo?” 

“We’ve come a long way from me mistaking you opening the door for a hug,” Peter snorted. He grabbed the cube and flipped the switch on one side methodically. 

“Yeah, about that…” Tony looked at him sheepishly.

“What?”

“That was me chickening out. It was a hug.” Peter laughed harder.

“Seriously? I was so embarrassed!”

“You think I wasn’t?” Tony started chuckling.

“We’re a mess, aren’t we?”

“A real hot mess,” Tony laughed. He tugged Peter once more into his chest. “Ready to go buddy?” 

“Yeah, I’m ready. FRIDAY, where is everybody?” 

“The tour group is currently visiting the Avengers museum.” 

“Thanks, Fri,” Tony said, “We’ll head that way now. Up we get.” He tugged Peter up beside him and slung an arm around his shoulder. They went into the very elevator his class had left through minutes ago, and it moved down. There was a distinct lack of elevator music. 

“Oh, no music this time, FRIDAY?” Peter asked, still grinning. Being with his dad did that, even on a bad day. 

“I would be more than happy to play something for you, BabyStark, but Ms. Romanoff has not requested it.” Tony looked down on him in confusion when Peter jerked.

“ Natasha did it?” He was not expecting that. 

“Did what, Pete?” Tony asked. Peter explained what happened and Tony started cackling. “God, she got you back, didn’t she?”

“You knew about that?” Peter had gotten all the Avengers with his music in the elevator prank, including Nat. 

“The second you did it to me I asked Fri to show me any other videos. I particularly liked Cap’s.” Peter had waited for Steve to get into the elevator alone. Five seconds later, FRIDAY was blaring the national anthem as loudly as her speakers could. The captain was so shocked that he flailed out and dented the elevator doors. Peter was very proud of himself. 

“Of course you did,” Peter fake groaned, “I actually made a combined video of all of them. We can watch it tonight if you want?” He grinned up at his dad.

“We are definitely doing that. It’s decided.” Tony smiled back at him as they exited the elevator and took in the sight that was the Avengers museum. Unfortunately, that meant that the comforting weight of Tony’s arm was gone from Peter’s shoulders. 

“Peter!” Ned called out. He was standing by a case just past the Black Widow exhibit. Peter hadn’t been in the museum since his first tour of the tower, but he felt like that case hadn’t been there before. He looked up at Tony for confirmation that he could go before running off to join Ned.

“Hey,” he said, “What’s up?”

“Everyone’s super confused about what happened, but I don’t think anyone thinks you’re his son. You okay?”  Peter gave a sigh of relief that no one had figured it out. You’d think for such smart kids, they’d be a little more observant. Ned was alone; it looked like Lillian and MJ were over at the case Tony had put in for Pepper.

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

“Good, because you need to see this!” Ned bounced on the balls of his feet. 

“See what?” 

“Dude, this !” He gestured behind him, and Peter finally took in the case he was standing at. There, behind several inches of bulletproof gas, stood his very first suit. It really did look like a onesie, he admitted to himself. The case was labeled “Spider-Man” and contained the suit, some of his first web shooters, and a screen with footage of his various missions and patrols. Beside the case stood a placard which read: “Things You Might Not Know About Your Friendly Neighborhood Spiderman.” Below that was a list. 

1. He denied his first mission because he had “homework.”
2. He’s allowed to stick magnets on the Winter Soldier’s arm.
3. One time he ran into a wall after a long day in the lab and apologized to it.
4. He’s terrified of spiders.
5. The first time he met Captain America he addressed him as “Mr. Captain Rogers America Sir,” turned bright red, turned around, and ran into Ironman. 
6. He once went to get a midnight snack and scared the Falcon half to death because he didn’t realize he was on the ceiling.
7. He has a web hammock in Tony Stark’s personal lab.
8. Pepper Potts likes him. If anyone hurts him, they have her to respond to. 
9. Black Widow calls him паучок which translates to “baby spider” in Russian. 
10. He managed to introduce Bucky Barnes to Vine and now we all have to suffer the consequences. 
11. He is a literal ray of sunshine, but also sarcastic as heck. 
12.  While he’s normally very sweet, if you touch his fruit snacks, you must fear for your life.  

Peter felt his face steadily grow more red the farther down the list he got. By the time he reached the end, he was sure his face resembled the mask of his suit. 

“Dude, are you really afraid of spiders?” Ned asked. 

“Is that actually what you’re taking away from this right now?”

“I mean, I already knew most of that already. Number eleven’s pretty much a given.”

“Seriously?” Peter’s voice definitely didn’t crack. Nope. Not at all. 

“What’s up, Parker?” Lillian asked from over his shoulder. 

“Oh, uh, nothing. We’re just looking at Spider-Man’s display,” he nervously explained. She nodded and hummed.

“Hm, cool. Are you really afraid of spiders?”

“Really? You t-- Hang on! You know ?” He looked between her, Ned, and MJ, who also didn’t seem perturbed in the slightest. 

“Dude, you’re not subtle at all . The number of times you’ve referred to the suit as yours and then corrected yourself is astounding. I can’t believe we’re the only ones who’ve figured it out.” MJ nodded beside her. Great. Just what he needed today. 

“Why didn’t you say anything?” he vigorously waved his arm in frustration. 

“So I could wait for the right moment and make you react like this,” she smiled an incredibly fake smile that was scarily creepy. 

“Great. Thanks for that. I’m just gonna go look at Bucky’s display.” With that he pushed away from his giggling friends and went over to the case labeled “Winter Soldier.” It had very few things in it, just some armor and information about missions and his time before HYDRA. He tried to gather himself after yet another big discovery, but his quiet was interrupted by the asshole to end all assholes. 

“So, Penis, I knew you were a freak, but really? Being a sugarbaby is beyond even what I expected of you.” Flash leaned against the rail beside him, signature smirk still on his face. 

“What the hell are you talking about?” Peter was tired. He was tired of Flash’s bullshit, he was tired of keeping secrets, he was tired of this whole trip. He was just so tired . 

“Tony Stark. ‘Personal intern,’ right? Yeah, I’m calling BS. Though, with a sugar daddy that rich, you must have some skill. Tell me, how’d you do it? How’d you convince someone like him to have someone like you ?” Of course that’s what Flash thought. Peter nearly puked in his mouth. 

“Go away, Flash, I don’t want to deal with you right now.” And my dad’s walking over here with a pissed off look on his face while my aunt and uncle walk in the door. Tony was, in fact, stalking over to the case with a look that meant he was very near summoning a gauntlet. Peter could also see Bucky and Nat by the Captain America case. 

“I’m sorry, but I wanted to see the Winter Soldier case. Are you gonna pretend you know him too? God, I can’t believe anyone would think that someone as worthless as you could actually work here. I mean, you’re nobody. Just Penis Parker, who somehow managed to get into Tony Stark’s--”

“ What the hell did you just say to him ?” Tony practically bellowed, stepping around Flash to situate himself between the two boys. Flash was somehow in no way perturbed, and just smirked at Tony freaking Stark. Peter had no idea what went on in that kid’s mind, but it couldn’t be anything good. 

“Nothing, sir. However, I think you got something wrong with that whole defensive yelling thing.” Tony stared at him, obviously astonished by how brave he was.

“Oh, yeah? And what was that?” 

“It’s ‘ her ,’ not ‘ him .’ I mean, earlier you even got her name wrong. It’s actually--” and then he dead named him. Oh, God he dead named him. And even worse, Tony had seen his school records. Tony knew what that name was. 

“ You mother fucking--! ” His dad snarled and lurched forward, looking like he was about to attack the kid. Suddenly, two pairs of strong arms came out of nowhere and held Tony back. Natasha and Bucky were standing on either side of Peter, who was now bracketed by two calm ex-assassins and a still-flailing scientist. 

“Tony, stop,” Natasha said in a cool, collected voice. 

“Did you hear what he said to him?” Tony was still raging. Flash finally had the good sense to look terrified, but the spectacle had already caught the attention of the rest of the class.

“No, but that doesn’t matter. You can’t hit a kid. Certainly not in front of other people.” Bucky supplied.

“But you didn’t hear! You didn’t hear what he called him!” 

“You need to calm down, Tony,” Natasha rubbed his arm, but it had no effect on the angry man. 

“He dead named him ! He fucking dead named him! He--he--my kid! He said that to my kid!” Natasha and Bucky shared a glance, then, as one, released him as if to say “have at him.” Shit, Peter thought. They really loved him, but this was not good. 

Quickly, he darted forward in between Flash and Tony. He had no intention of hurting his dad, but he was fully capable of using his super-strength to hold him back.

“Peter,” Tony growled.

“No,” he said firmly, “He’s an asshole. I know that. We all know that. And he did an asshole thing. But you cannot hurt him. That would be wrong, and his parents are rich, Mr. Stark. Not as rich as you, but rich enough to let this reach the press. You can’t do that. Okay? Now calm down. You can do other things, you can get him in huge trouble for this. I’ll help you. But don’t hit him, please.” Over the course of Peter’s speech, Tony’s shoulders slowly lost some tension. He was still very angry, however.

“But he called you a ‘her’ and fucking dead named you!”

“I know, I was there. But you cannot hurt him. You really need to calm down.” Tony relaxed further. He was still incredibly wound up, but Peter didn’t think he was in any danger of hurting someone. 

“Okay, okay. You’re right, kid. I shouldn’t, ah, punch him. I’m sorry.” Tony gave a nod and leaned backwards. Peter turned around to look at Flash’s ashen face.

“Flash, I really recommend you go away right now. Tony might not punch you, but Bucky does have a metal arm, and I think we both know it’s a bad idea to get on the wrong side of Black Widow.” Behind him, Bucky waved his shiny fingers, and Nat just stood there, not moving a muscle yet twice as terrifying as the man beside her. 

Flash gave a shaky nod and dashed away to stand by Mr. Harrington, who had the decency to glare at him. Tony took a deep breath, then looked down at Peter. 

“Can I go talk to your teacher about this? Get it all sorted out?” Tony asked him, “I promise not to punch anyone.” Peter gave a shaky nod. Tony patted his shoulder comfortingly and went the same way as Flash. Peter really hoped he held to his promise. 

“Come, паучок,” Natasha said, “Let’s go somewhere quiet.” She and Bucky led him out through one of the back doors and into a small conference room. They sat him down on an uncomfortable leather couch and situated themselves on either side of him. 

“Pete, are you alright?” Bucky asked. Normally. Peter didn’t think about it. His automatic reaction to this question was always, “Yeah, I’m fine.” Today he stopped. He thought for a minute, then decided he would just be honest.

“Uh, not really? ‘Cause Flash is an asshole, but I really didn’t think he’d go that far. I was just letting him bully me so he wouldn’t do it to others, and I wanted to punch him too but then Dad tried to, and I knew that was bad, so I had to defend him even when he was so mean, and I know you guys think I’m this sweet, kind guy who could never hurt a soul, but I really, really, really wanted to hurt him right then. He’s just so awful, and I lie to other people but also myself because I say it’s not that bad and it’s not a problem, but he makes me feel really really horrible, and now I’m scared that it’ll get worse because he’s going to get in trouble with Mr. Stark, and he’ll be angry about that, so I’m worried it’s gonna get worse, and I really don’t want that to happen.” He realized that tears were gushing from his eyes, and he had to breathe in through his mouth because his nose was so stuffed up. 

“Oh, Peter,” Natasha murmured and pulled him into a hug. He felt Bucky’s warm hand on his knee. Peter leaned into their touch and rested his head on Natasha’s collarbone. 

“Peter,” Bucky said quietly, “Can I tell you something?”

“Yeah?” 

“I met Steve before he took the serum. He was just this little guy, but he was so strong. Not in muscles, he was smaller than you are, but his heart was--and still is--the kindest and bravest one I have ever known. He stood up to any bully that came his way, even when he couldn’t really fight back. 

“I see him in you, Peter. He fought back against bullies through his fists and his outspoken words, but you did it in your silence. You were so incredibly brave to let Flash pick on you like that, just to protect other people from him. But listen to me, Pete. You don’t have to do that anymore. You have the Avengers on your side. You have Tony Stark as your dad. You get to be protected now. Tony is going to make sure that Flash never comes near you again. 

“Peter Parker, I promise you, you will never once have to deal with that goddamn idiot again. You have us now. You have a big family of people who love you so much, and we all promise to protect you. Peter, you don’t have to be brave all the time. We all get scared. Even Natasha,” Peter gave a wet chuckle at that. “But I really need you to hear me right now. If anything, anything like this happens ever again, I need you to tell us. Can you do that?”

“Yeah,” Peter’s voice shook. “I can do that. Thank you, Bucky. Nat. I love you.” Bucky looked like he was going to cry too, now.

“I love you too,” he said.

“Me too, Peter,” Natasha whispered into his hair, “I didn’t think I’d ever get to have anything close to a child. But I love you like one, малыш” (baby). Peter shook with a sob and wrapped his arms around her waist. They stayed there for a long time, wrapped up in a little circle of comfort. They finally looked up when the door cracked open.

“It’s just me,” Tony said quietly, “Are you alright, Pete?”

“Getting there,” he whispered.

“Good. That’s good. I sent the class to a panel with Scott and Bruce, who just got back. That should keep them busy. I told Mr. Harrington what Flash did, and he got sent downstairs to be picked up right away. I’m going to take this up with the school, and if I have my way, he’ll be expelled. Is there anything you need, bambino?” Tony walked over and knelt on the floor in front of the couch. 

“Um… hair club?” He looked up at Nat hopefully.

“What’s hair club?” Tony asked. 

“Wanda, Bucky, Pepper, and I invented it,” she explained, “If someone has a bad day, we get together and do each other’s hair. It was originally just the team members with long hair, but we loved Peter’s so much that he joined the club. Hill comes sometimes.” Tony gave a small smile.

“How did I not know about this before, Pete?”

“I thought you did. I dunno, I just never mentioned it. You can come too, if you want,” he offered. 

“Nah, that’s okay. If you want me to, I will. If not though, I’ll check on you later. I need to make sure Scott and Bruce aren’t giving away too much.”

“Yeah, you should do that,” Bucky said, “I trust Bruce, but Scott can be a wild card.”

“Don’t I know it.” Tony smiled. “I love you, buddy.” He patted Peter’s arm, gave him a quick kiss on the forehead, then headed out the door. 

“Wanda and Pepper are out today, so it’ll just be us. Where do you want to go?” Nat asked him. 

“My room?” 

“Sure, kid. Let’s go,” Bucky said. He scooped Peter up into his arms and held him bridal-style. 

“Agh!” Peter shrieked, and they even earned a laugh out of him. “Put me down!” 

“Are you sure? I can carry you all the way,” Bucky laughed along with him. 

“You know, that does sound nice. But no, I can walk upstairs, thank you very much.”

“If you say so,” Bucky said before dropping him to the ground. While he wasn’t being carried anymore, Peter did notice that he was always somehow in contact with both of the heroes, who had positioned themselves on either side of him.

They walked back through the now empty museum and to the elevators, where a door immediately dinged open on their arrival. Thank God for FRIDAY. The lift took them straight up to the penthouse and opened with another ding. Natasha snagged his hand and they made their way to his room. 

He went into the bathroom and changed from his regular clothes and binder into pjs and an oversized sweatshirt. 

Bucky and Natasha sat on his bed, while he situated himself between them again. His back and head rested on Bucky’s chest while his feet tangled with Nat’s. She kept a hold of his hand, and used her other one to run her fingers through his hair. Bucky did the same, and his eyes fluttered shut with a sigh. It wasn’t much of a Hair Club, but it was comfortable all the same.  

Finally, in a familiar environment with no potential threats whatsoever, his body relaxed. His eyes closed completely and he put his entire weight against the supersoldier behind him. He trusted these two ex-assassins with his life, and they obviously cared a great deal about him. Few people managed to get Black Widow to hold their hand and run her fingers through their hair, while they are being cuddled by Winter Soldier. And man, was it nice. 

Soon, he found himself drifting off to sleep. This day had been draining, and he really needed to rest. It was so comfortable here, in his bed, with two of his favorite people. 

As Nat lightly scratched his scalp, and Bucky ran his cool, metal fingers up and down his arm, Peter fell asleep. Tomorrow would be hard. He would have to deal with everything that had happened, and would eventually have to go back to school. But for today, he was okay. He was safe. He was home. 

Art For Chapter 5

Chapter Text

While Peter was sleeping, life went on for his class. They went to the panel with two of the Avengers and asked a mixture of complicated science questions and questions about Peter. The word about what happened between Flash and Peter spread like wildfire, and by the time the tour was over, everyone knew that the bully had gotten on the bad side of not only Tony Stark, but the two scariest Avengers as well. Of course, they had no idea that the ex-assassins were currently snuggling their classmate and playing with his hair, but what you don’t know can’t hurt you. Or terrify you considering your classmate cuddles with murderers. 

Once the panel was done, Tony had Lillian lead the students down a long hall towards a nondescript conference room. On the way he pulled up the security camera feed from Peter’s room. He smiled warmly at the sight of Peter with his aunt and uncle, obviously asleep.

“Um, Mr. Stark?” Peter’s friend asked from behind him. 

“Yeah, Ted?” Tony knew the kid’s name was Ned, not that he’d ever admit it to anyone. He had done thorough background checks on all of Peter’s friends, with the help of most of the Avengers. Ned was an incredibly bright student, and Tony had a lot of respect--mixed in with resentment--for him for helping Peter hack the suit. 

“Are you looking at Peter?”

“Uh, yeah. Why?” 

“He left pretty quickly, I didn’t get a chance to check on him. Can I see?” Tony felt a tug in his chest at how much the two friends cared about each other. He’d heard countless stories about Ned from Peter, to the point where he felt like he knew him well, even if they’d have less than a dozen conversations. Ned and Peter reminded him of himself and Rhodey. 

“Oh, yeah! Here, he’s sleeping.” Tony handed the phone over, but continued to watch his son over Ned’s shoulder. 

“Is that Black Widow? And the Winter Soldier?” Ned looked up at him, astonished.

“Yeah, but please don’t tell them I showed you. They care about him a whole lot, but it’d ruin their rep to let people know.” Ned nodded seriously, then looked back down at the screen. 

“Aw,” he said quietly, “He always looks so calm when he’s sleeping. When he’s awake he always go, go, going, but he’s peaceful like this.”

“I know what you mean,” Tony said quietly. No matter how much he loved Peter’s constant energy, he was just so cute when he was asleep. 

“Thank you,” Ned said quietly. His worry about Peter had obviously taken a toll on him. Every other time Tony had met the boy he’d been close to fainting in excitement. Today he was quiet, composed. 

“For what?”

“He’s had a hard life. A really, really hard life. I’m pretty sure you and I are the only ones who know anything close to everything he’s been through. He’s always so strong, so good at pretending. Lately, though, he hasn’t had to pretend as much. He’s got a nice home. A big family. A dad who loves him. Thank you for making him happier.” He said it all in a quiet voice so none of the class could hear, but that didn’t stop Tony from tearing up.

“I guess… your welcome? But it isn’t all on me, you know. Nearly every time he tells me the best part of his day, or a funny story, you’re part of it, Ned. You matter so much to him. You make him happy too. So, thank you , you know? Thank you for giving my son a good best friend.” Ned finally looked up from the screen displaying his friend. He had tears in his eyes too.

“I’m really tempted to hug you, but Peter said you don’t do much physical contact.” 

“Bring it in.” Tony opened his arms. God, Peter was making him soft. Ned wrapped his arms around Tony quickly. It wasn’t nearly as comfortable as Peter-hugs, frankly it was quite awkward, but it was nice nonetheless. After a few moments they pulled back, not wanting the group in front of them to see. 

“Alright, let’s get going. You’ve got some NDA’s to sign,” Tony said. He walked to the front of the group and opened the door in front of them. There, in front of each place at the table, sat a threatening stack of paperwork.

“Okay, everyone!” Tony called out, clapping his hands together, “I know this tour has been very entertaining, but there are certain facts that have been revealed to you today that you should not know. Therefore, you will each be signing a form saying that certain information you have seen or heard today will not go beyond this room. You will not tell your parents. You will not tell your friends. You will definitely not post it on social media. You shouldn’t even discuss it with each other. Do I make myself clear?” There were serious and slightly scared nods of assent from everyone in the room. 

The students and their teacher sat around the large table and began to fill them out. As they worked, Tony pulled Lillian aside.

“Did you learn anything new today? Please be honest.”

“Nothing that Peter hadn’t already told me or I figured out myself. Well, I did learn that you’re adopting him, but he told me himself over lunch.”

“What? We agreed not to tell anyone!” Tony was shocked that his kid would go against their decision, especially since he was all for it earlier. 

“Oh, he didn’t do it on purpose. He accidentally called you ‘dad’ then just decided to be honest.” Tony groaned and rubbed his eyes. 

“Of course he did. Well, you’ll be needing to sign one too, then. It’ll be a little different, and you can sign after your shift is over.”

“Understandable,” she said, “And I’ll do it. But I do want you to know, even without this form, I swear not to tell anyone. This is something for you and Peter to control, and I would never go against that.”

“Thanks, Lillian,” he grinned at her, “Do you wanna see where Peter is right now?”

“Why do I feel like you’re about to show me some great blackmail material?” She smiled back at him.

“Because I am.” He once again handed over his phone to a kid he’d come to care about through Peter. Soft.

Lillian laughed outright when she saw him cuddled up with the Avengers. 

“Damn, he’s never gonna live this down, is he?”

“Not a chance.”

Two hours later, after Midtown School was already on their way back to campus and Lillian was busy signing her NDA, Tony finally returned to the penthouse. He headed straight for Peter’s room, worried about how he was doing, despite keeping a constant eye on the surveillance. 

When he came in, Natasha got up from the bed and released Peter’s hand. He made a quiet snuffling noise and reached out for her. It looked like she had to force herself to walk away from him. Unlike Natasha, Bucky had fallen asleep as well. 

“You don’t need to leave,” Tony said.

“No, it’s okay. I have some work I need to get done, unfortunately, and I was just waiting with him until you got back.”

“Okay, if you say so. You can always come back, though.” Nat nodded her head, obviously thinking about taking him up on his offer. “How is he?” Tony asked. 

“He’s alright. Hasn’t woken up since he first fell asleep a couple hours ago. He seemed pretty shaken up about the whole thing downstairs, though. Might wanna deal with Flash before sending him back to school,” She explained. 

“That’s my plan. Peter said I can’t ruin his future, but I can get him expelled. He certainly won’t be getting a job here.” 

“Good,” she said firmly, “If that kid comes anywhere near Peter again, I just might skin him alive, no matter what the kid says.”

“Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that.” Tony secretly agreed with her. Nobody had a right to do that to anyone, let alone his son. 

She patted his shoulder twice before leaving the room. Tony walked quietly over to the bed, removed his shoes and suit jacket, and slid into her previously occupied spot. The second he ran his hand through Peter’s hair, the boy shifted from Bucky’s slumbering chest to his own. The man woke from the sudden shift in positions and looked around in confusion.

“Wha--”

“Shhhh,” Tony cut him off and pointed at Peter’s sleeping head on top of him. 

“Right,” Bucky murmured. His hand joined Tony’s in Peter’s hair.

“Hey, move! I was here first!” Tony whispered harshly.

“Actually, I was! He’s on your lap, why don’t I get his hair?” Bucky matched his tone.

“Because he’s my kid!”

“Well you’re not in Hair Club! I founded it!” 

“Are you guys f-fighting over my hair?” Peter said through a yawn.

“Now look what you did! You woke him up!” Tony berated Bucky. 

“That was you! He probably felt your chest moving so much and it woke him up!” 

“You’re louder than I am, and Peter has super hearing!” 

“Shhhhh,” Peter mumbled and flapped his hand so it lightly slapped Tony’s cheek. “Go back to sleep. We have war tomorrow. Gotta stop the r-rebals.” With that he slipped back into sleep.

“What the hell was he talking about?” Bucky asked, so confused by Peter’s strange objection that he forgot he was arguing. 

“I have no clue, but at least he’s asleep again.” Tony smiled down at his son again. 

“No thanks to you,” the supersoldier mumbled petulantly. 

“Oh, shut up and go back to sleep.” Bucky did, in fact, do just that. Eventually, Tony joined him. 

Two hours later, Steve walked through the door on a hunt to grab Bucky for date night.

“Buck? What’re you--” he cut off at the sight before him. Both Bucky and Tony were curled around the child between them. Tony still had his hand in Peter’s hair, but it looked like it had stopped scratching once he fell asleep. “Would ya look at that. FRIDAY, take a picture of this and send it to Pepper.” 

“On it, sir,” the AI said. 

He took in the sweet sight of his boyfriend and family once more before sitting on the bed beside them. He rubbed Bucky’s ankle lightly with his hand. 

“Nnnnngh,” Bucky groaned as he shifted slightly.

“Buck,” Steve whispered, “Wake up, darlin’. We’ve got a date.”

“Cozy,” he complained, wriggling slightly.

“C’mon sweetheart, I know you're cozy, but we’ve had this planned for weeks.” Steve did feel bad for waking his boyfriend like this, but he knew Bucky would thank him eventually. 

“Cap?” Tony asked, obviously having been awoken as well. “What’re you doing?”

“It’s nearly five. Bucky and I have a date tonight.”

“Right, right. I should probably wake Peter up too, we need to get some food in him.” Tony yawned. Steve smiled at Tony’s care for his kid. When he first met him, Steve never would have thought Tony Stark could be a good father. As it turned out, he was one of the best. 

“That’s a good idea,” he said before refocusing his attention on Bucky, “You awake, sweetheart?”

“Unfortunately,” the soldier grumbled, “I like cuddling with Peter. Why’d you have to do this to us?”

“We’ve been planning this date for a while, so I didn’t think you’d want to miss it. And Peter needs to eat anyway. You won’t be missing out on much.” Bucky just grumbled in response and pushed himself to a seated position. Steve looked over at Tony, who was trying to coax Peter awake. 

“Hey, bambino. You need to wake up now.” He smiled at Peter. 

“Dad?” Peter groaned as he finally joined the land of the living. Surprisingly, neither of the soldiers commented on him calling Tony 'dad.' Nat had figured it out a while ago, she must have filled her two friends in. “Wha’s going on?” he slurred his words. 

“Nothings wrong, Pete. We just need to get you something to eat, then you can go right back to sleep. That sound good?” Peter’s stomach gave a rumble, proving Tony’s point. 

“M’kay,” he said, “But I’m not walkin’. While I was asleep, I think someone took my legs. You’ll have to carry me.” He grinned loopily up at Tony.

“Is that right?”

“Mhmmm. Now take me away, servant!”

“Oh, so I’m your servant now?” Tony asked teasingly. 

“Yeah. I want pizza!” He sounded like a little boy, still exhausted from his day and in the clutches of sleep.

“Didn’t you have that for lunch?”

“I only had two slices! I want more!” Tony would address just how little his son was eating another day. For now, he needed to find some pizza. 

“I think we can arrange that, Underoos.” Tony lifted the teen into his arms and walked out the door, leaving Steve to get Bucky up and ready for their date. 

He carried Peter into the living room, where Natasha and Clint were watching Brave . 

“Make sure he doesn’t do anything stupid?” He asked them. The second he put Peter down, however, the boy scrambled into Natasha’s lap. 

“What am I, chopped liver?” Clint asked, splaying his hands out. Tony had no idea how Peter managed to turn nearly all the Avengers soft, but damn he did it well. Peter reached out his hand in Clint’s general direction and made a grabbing motion. “Oh, ok then,” the archer said sarcastically. He did, however, immediately sit right next to Nat and let Peter put his legs across his lap. 

“FRIDAY,” Tony said to the ceiling, “Why don’t you order us some pizza from downstairs while I make us some popcorn and grab candy. It’s movie night tonight, let everyone else know.” 

Five minutes later, Tony returned to the living room with seven bowls of popcorn and twenty different types of candy on a tray, as well as Peter’s favorite fuzzy blanket draped over his arm. The pizza had arrived while he was getting everything else ready, and it looked like everyone else had joined the party. 

The living room was equipped with plenty of furniture, perfect for an Avengers movie night. There were two couches fit for three people, one huge one big enough to fit eight if you squished, and enough pillows to make an entire bed if you taped them together. Tony knew from experience. The carpet was also comfortable enough to sit on the floor if you so choose, and there were a couple tables scattered around that were now covered in half empty pizza boxes. 

Peter sat in Natasha’s lap in the middle of the biggest couch, with his feet still in Clint’s lap. Pepper was beside Nat and had a big blanket with the Avengers symbol on it thrown over her. Rhodey was on the other side of Clint with his own blanket, this one decorated with a picture of War Machine. Bruce and Sam sat side by side on the corner farthest from Rhodey, Wanda and Vision were cuddling on the smaller couch to the left of the big one, and Thor took up the entirety of the other couch. Most of them were periodically glancing at Peter in concern, as they had obviously heard what happened. He looked like he had fallen back asleep. The sight of his family brought a warm smile to Tony’s face.

“Someone move some of these boxes, I come bearing snacks!” He said and caught the attention of his family. Wanda lazily raised a hand, and glowing red sparks clearing one of the tables of pizza boxes. Tony set down the tray, grabbed two bowls of popcorn, a king size kit kat, and some m&ms. He motioned for Pepper to scoot over and settled himself between her and Natasha. He handed one bowl of popcorn to Nat and the other to his wife, then set down the candy. 

“Can I take him?” He quietly asked Natasha. 

“Sure.” She smiled at him and shifted Peter over into his lap. “He ate some pizza, then fell right back asleep. He didn’t seem too upset to be awake though, so we should be good to keep him out here for movie night.”

“Thanks,” he said. He wrapped his arm around his kids waist and once more looked around at their family. Everyone looked so peaceful . Wanda and Vision seemed to be having a quiet conversation. Thor laughed animatedly at something Sam had said, while Bruce was happily watching their exchange and chuckling quietly. Clint looked a little upset that he had been robbed of Peter’s feet, but Rhodey reached out to share his blanket. Natasha was looking around at everyone, an ever so rare smile gracing her face. He couldn’t actually see Pepper, but her head was a comforting weight on his shoulder. 

“Alright guys, what do we want to watch?” he asked everyone. Peter mumbled something into his shoulder. “What was that, bambino?”

“Men in Black,” he said, “Thor promised to tell me if the aliens looked real or not.” 

“Is everyone okay with Men in Black?” He got multiple nods of assent and asked FRIDAY to pull it up. 

Despite how horrible the rest of their day had been, it was a really good night. Nearly all of their family was there, they were watching a good movie, and were all incredibly comfortable where they were. It was never very likely for people war-hardened and often hurting to be this happy. 

Thor kept them laughing the entire night by his outraged comments about how wrong the aliens were. Half-way through, Steve and Bucky came in.

“What the hell?!” Steve exclaimed when he saw what was on the screen.

“You guys have date night, we would’ve invited you!” Tony defended himself.

“No, not that! That guy! I know him!” Steve pointed at Agent K. Tony glanced at the screen.

“You know Tommy Lee Jones, who was born after you went in the ice?”

“No, he was a general! When I took the serum, he was there. I don’t think he liked me a whole lot.” 

“Damn, Cap,” Sam said, “I knew you were old, but we might need to get your eyesight checked.” 

“Shut up,” Steve grumbled, “C’mon Bucky, we need to go.” He grabbed a laughing Bucky’s arm and headed out the door. 

“Bye, old man!” Tony called out after him. 

“Fuck off Tony!” Steve yelled back. Tony gasped like an old woman.

“ Language !” 

So, yeah. Things weren’t perfect. Tomorrow was going to be rough on everyone, and Peter would be having a rough few weeks. But they still had moments like these. Where everyone was safe, warm, and happy. Where you could trust that if anything went wrong, the people around you would be there to protect you. Where Tony could wrap his arms around his wife and son while they watched a funny movie and he shared a bag of candy with his very own kid. Where you had a family all of you own, even if it wasn’t very normal. Who cared, anyway? The best things are never normal.