Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Being an office worker was as bad as it was known, he realized it since the very first day. It wasn’t that Shang Qinghua was particularly happy when he was hired, like seven months after graduating from college, but the bills and debts he accumulated in those months were part of his worst nightmares, along with poverty and homelessness.

For someone like him, who didn’t have no one to ask for economic assistance, earning money through whatever easy method was all he needed. He could buy cheap food; he was a pro in looking for all the sales and almost-expired food so his expenses in that matter were the lowest. That way he only focused on his little apartment’s rent and the services like internet, nothing was most important than his internet. For seven months, it was the only friend (so lame) who helped him find his odd jobs. And only he knows how much he suffered because of that desperation for money.

Now, his new and true job in the company wasn’t the best paid, the amount was barely enough to pay the normal bills, plus debts. If it wasn’t for his irregular income from the novel he wrote since graduating (maybe his second friend? He wasn’t as lonely as he thought… pathetic), he wouldn’t be able to eat!

That novel was a harem and cultivation themed novel. He wasn’t really proud of it; his original plot was completely different from the thing he wrote so it could win all the readers it had now. Not that he ever dreamt about having like a million of readers who fought constantly in the comment section and through every novel centered forum against haters. Sometimes he wondered if haters were more than his faithful readers. Who knows, at least most of them paid before their devastating disappointment.

He knew, better than any snob hater, how ridiculous his story was. He wanted a normal plot, a story more centered in the world, not in who occupied the protagonist’ bed, but people were more interested in the later. His readers wanted sex scenes and all the magical bullshit he came out with so they could have their papapa and, as he discovered, he was good at that. So it was a win and win situation for both.

In those seven months he wrote as many words as possible and devised new plots and side-stories everywhere with all the protagonist’s wives. He was glad that he saved a lot of stories because now with his new job, his energy and time for it was less. Hardly he wrote like eight thousand in the week and between twenty and thirty thousand in the weekends. He was almost sure that the end of his novel was near, and so his second income. If only it would endure until he had paid the bank his loans. It was all that he wished for, and wished for the illumination for a brand-new novel which could make the same trick with the readers. Maybe a BL story was best, he had seen that those leave good income if successful, but it was like throwing a flower to a skater ring, next to hundreds of others and hope for the skater to catch it. Why the analogy? He was watching a low-budget movie with that subject.

There were too many, even his own novel was a lucky strike. Surely, he now had a formed fanbase, but if he were to enter the BL world, the men, who were most of his readers, would hate him to the core. It could be that they, his former fans in that if world, could sabotage his new story just because homophobia.

At least he still had a good number of entries saved for the next months, hopefully six months, so those were worries that his future self would have to deal with, not him.

That day, though, all he could think of was in the softness of his cheap old bed and nothing more. He had to work some extra hours, after two months in that tiresome job, extra hours weren’t nothing new. But it was as hard as the first time when he had to leave the building at night, with most of his collages already gone. Not that he was friends with any, he was as invisible as his college days. But still, it was less lonely to walk towards the subway when they were around; and being a Friday night, the loneliness was more than palpable with the street full of bars he had to cross so he could take the last transportation he needed to arrive home.

He could make the thirty minutes’ walk, like every other day, but today he was so exhausted because the monstrous number of reports he had to do that day. It was a luxury he earned that day. It had nothing to do with his lack of social life in which he didn’t need money for going out to drink. Definitely not and not his loneliness of that day. Nope.

“Get the fuck out of here already.” A really cold and deep voice brought him out of his head. The first thing he saw, in the entrance of an alley, near of one of the bars, was a tall man pushing a thicker man, who was getting bald. You didn’t need to be an expert to know that the taller man’s job was to deal with the drunkards, just what he was doing that moment while the rest of the people wasn’t paying attention to him, it was a typical occurrence there, after all.

The taller one pushed the other once more, apparently, he was harassing someone in there due to his current state. His speech was slurring, at that distance, Shang Qinghua barely understood the words about still having money and being a client, so they had to do what he asked for. Apart from office jobs, his first most hated job was any customer service. He did it once and he wouldn’t do it never again. Dealing with stubborn people who didn’t want to acknowledge their mistakes was the worst.

Sighing and giving a mental shoulder pat to the security guy, he kept walking. Or so it was his intention when a blade shone a few seconds before stabbing the taller man in his side.

The fatter man went from angry to scared, then with a disgusting face that said, your fault, you got what you deserve. As that, he walked away with his hands in his pockets, barely nervous. Shang Qinghua looked back at the taller man, just in the moment he turned around and wobbled.

“Hey… hey!” called him until he reached his not hurt side so the taller man could use him as a, very, short support. “Let me call an ambulance, don’t move too much.”

“No,” said pushing down his cellphone, trying to give another step but being interrupted by the pain. “Not a hospital, just the back door.”

Was the pain altering his speech? Who speaks like that?! Asked Shang Qinghua mentally while obeying the stubborn man. If he were to become someone else’s problem, that would mean he could be back on his route to rest.

He had to knock at the said back door while the other kept his hand near the injury. Another bulky man opened, with a quick look understood the situation so he took a step back for them to enter. Shang Qinghua wondered why he didn’t take from him the taller man and walked in; he was obviously stronger than his tiny self who was even more tiny with that tall man at his side.

Still, the other didn’t offer any help while guiding them through the narrow halls at the back of the bar where music was a bit muffled along with the vibrations. Just a bit.

He started to feel somewhat scared, he was walking deeper in an unknown place with two strangers, one of them hurt and the other not even worried about that, as if it were something that happened with regularity. It was not a long walk, but his nerves made him feel that he was in a different building, even in a basement, although they never used any stairs.

“Lay him here, I’ll go fetch the first-aid kit.” He didn’t wait for an answer, neither did he entered the room, leaving the shorter and the taller men to make their way in. There was a sofa, maybe a bit insufficient for someone that tall, still, Shanq Qinghua was able to let him lay down. He almost fell over the injured man when letting him down. He was heavier than him, of course!

The clothes of the taller man weren’t drenched in blood, yet. He knew about those kinds of injuries because all the research he had to do in order to be a good writer, a decent writer. It was one of the funniest things of being one, or considering yourself one, because all the murder knowledge you gather. Nothing you could discuss in social gatherings if you didn’t want to be feared or avoided. He was avoided even without sharing those abnormal topics, anyway.

When the other man came back, he was about to walk out and say goodbye to all that crazy experience, however, that same man put the box’s kit in his hands and told him what to prepare while he was opening the taller man’s jacket and shirt. All his complaints were stuck in his throat when he saw the perfect body of that tall man. Six pack, toned pecs, clear skin, except for the bloody part at his side, gorgeous collar bones and those two beautiful and notorious lines that were in the direction of…

“Give me some gauzes and put some here, I’m gonna take it out,” ordered the other, making him focus back on what was needed. He complied and watched with wide eyes the fast move that he used to pull the knife out without any hesitation. It wasn’t his first time, Shang Qinghua was now sure of it.

As fast as he took it out, he made pression over the bleeding injury. With calm words, while the taller was moaning in pain, he instructed for the stiches he needed and started his job as if he were a certified doctor or something. The situation may be crazy, but it was giving him so much writing material. Things you wouldn’t feel or fully see if you were only to read about it online.

In less than twenty minutes, the wound was stitched and cleaned. Somewhere in the process, the taller man lost his consciousness, due to the pain of being sewn up. “So who are you?” finally asked the other to him.

“I’m just someone who was passing by and saw the drunk stabbing you coworker, or so I think he is?” The only answer he received was a hum and the instruction to wait there while he talked to his boss about what happened.

Defeated, once again, in his attempt to get out of their lives, Shang Qinghua sighed and turned around to observe the little room where he was. The walls were dark and dirty, even with that dim blue shade of color, the filthy stains were visible. Pretty much as how his apartment looked like when he first moved in. The noise from the bar was almost unnoticeable, because of that, he forgot where he was for a bit.

And then he focused on the black sofa in which the taller man was resting, it had it edges wore down, with places where the filling was poking out, and with cigarette markings here and there, that made him shudder because he couldn’t stand the thought of burnings. To prevent his mind to wander off to things that were better to forget, he occupied his mind in how handsome the fallen man was.

His black hair, short and arranged to the back, had some slim braids that surely beautifully framed his jawline, which was so perfect and pronounced, his skin as clear as the rest of his perfect body, his nose was risen in a manly and beautiful way that took all his focus for some long seconds before he fell for his lips. Damn, those still rosy and full lips, not too thin nor too thick. He couldn’t see but if those lips were to be hiding a beautiful row of white pearls for teeth and two prominent canines, that would made him go feral because then, he was his ideal man. Not that he would ever have the chance of having something with someone like that, he was too simple and dull that never in all his lives he could be seen by someone like that.

He threw away the thought instantly. He was a beautiful stranger that he might not ever see again; with his bad luck, he probably would keep using that street and never have a glance of him again. So he did what he was best doing, drowning his most wild wishes and keep telling himself that he wasn’t interested in any kind of relationship, not sexual nor romantic.

“Now then, the boss has given him some days off, so take this.” The second the other man came back, he started talking while handing to him a black backpack, which left Shang Qinghua confused, again. “I’m gonna take you to his house, so you can take care of him because I still have to work and he won’t be able to take care of himself the first days, so come with me.”

This time, he grabbed the taller man, his strong arms really carried him in a bridal way without much effort. But Shang Qinghua wasn’t even paying attention to that, his mind completely blanked out when he heard what the other said. “Was-was that a joke?” He stammered, not moving an inch from where he was standing.

“Why would it be? He’s hurt, isn’t he?” The other was serious, not a single sign of a smirk.

Chapter Text

“Wait, wait, wait.” He walked to stop in front of him, in his way out of the room. “I don’t even know him or you, I did my good deed and called out for help for him, but that’s all I can do! Or should do. I don’t see why I have to take care of him more than that.” He was sure that things shouldn’t go like that in those kinds of events, not in real life, at least.

“Why not? I can’t take care of him, and you are a good person.” The other man kind of looked like an innocent person, and serious as if it were the most natural thing to do. Was he nuts or something?

“Then why not in a hospital? His boss can pay, doesn’t he?” He decided not to let the other one manipulating him. “And I have my own things to do, I’m not a nurse, and I need to go to my own house.”

“Well, then let us go to your place, I leave him there at your care and that’s all, quick.” He tried to walk away once more, but Shang Qinghua didn’t move, still with his mouth open wide and his expression as he couldn’t believe his words. Because he couldn’t.

“No! Wh-why would I have some stranger inside my place?” He finally said, he was starting to feel irritated at the stubbornness of the other man, who looked like he wanted this over. “And why you so easily leave a wounded friend with a stranger?”

“I’m losing work hours because of you,” sighed the other, putting down the taller man, back in the sofa. When Shang Qinghua was about to get close so he could give back the backpack, the other pulled him from his wrist and took out his wallet with a terrifying expertise.

“Hey! Give me that!” When he tried to snatch back his wallet, the other man rose it up higher, too high for someone like him, and fished out his ID.

“Tell me, Qinghua,” the way he called him, as if they were familiar with each other, made the smaller man had goosebumps. “Are you gonna tell me where you live or rather, I look for that info with my own means?” And now it definitely was a threat. “Which will be, hm?”

Soon after he was seated in the car of a stranger who was driving him home with another stranger laying in the backseat of the car. Nobody could blame his choice, the threat was too real, and, for the looks of that impertinent other man, he knew it weren’t empty threats. Everybody, who had read mafia stories and the sort, knew that the people who owned those kinds of business were far from good people, right? So what other choice he had besides a picture of his dead body making it to the front page, or maybe a little article, about how it was found near a river or a forest? No, thanks, he wanted to live some few years still.

Thankfully, all the madness could be over once the taller man wakes up, maybe he wouldn’t want to be in the house and care of a pathetic man like him, or maybe when he feels better, he would walk off and never seeing each other again, like it was his plan before. Now he wanted to be a believer so he could pray for that to be the outcome.

With trembling hands and his throat completely dry, he arrived at his door and opened so the man carrying another man could enter. When the mad man saw how small his sofa was, he took direction towards the only room in the house, it had an individual and a bit old bed, so when the other was laid on it, he looked so out of place.

“He has money, so I’m kinda sure he’ll pay you for all this, if not,” the man put his hand in his shoulder, making him shrunk even more, “I’m sorry, but at least you can feel happy that you’re able to save someone’s life.”

With that, he walked out of the house, leaving a Shang Qinghua speechless and so scared. What should he do now? It was all that was in  his head, without finding any reasonable answer, so he just let the backpack in the floor, near his suitcase and let himself fall on his sofa with a sigh worth of all the happiness he might had as a child.

He didn’t notice how much time passed like that until he heard his doorbell ring. Half afraid and half confused, he went to see who rang it after so much time without being used.

“Here, these are his medicines, give one of each, every eight hours, starting now.” And that was the other man, giving him two little boxes of medicine, almost pushing them towards him before turning around and leaving one more time.

Now the reality hit him back. He truly had a complete stranger, from who he didn’t know his name, to take care of as if he was even good at taking care of himself. He went to the kitchen to retrieve a glass with water and walked to his room. The nameless man was still sleeping, his brows furrowed, showing that he was feeling pain, obviously, which made him sigh and walk towards him.

With a lot of effort, he barely made the other person mildly wake up so he could drink the water after he had to put the pills inside his mouth. He heard him growl as if he was some kind of savage beast or something. If his semi unconscious face wasn’t so perfect, he may had run away without giving him nothing. Was it normal for a person to do those kinds of sounds? He was starting to doubt his own knowledge in human behavior, as if he hadn’t interacted with people in years. He knew things, the things he had read in novels or watched on TV, but he always thought some were exaggerations or mere fantasies.

Once he tucked him back in his sheets, he went back to his living room, to fall over the sofa with all his joints finally giving up from all the stress of the day. He really just wanted to come back to sleep, his mind wasn’t even interested in writing that day, he was thinking on the first Friday in months in which he wouldn’t spent the night awake and eating instant noodles. Why would the heavens punish him like that? It wasn’t fair, and maybe now his life would be in danger for meddling with some gangsters or whatever they were.

“I shouldn’t have stuck my nose into this mess…” he said woefully. If he were another person, maybe he could be calling some close friend or family to tell them about his predicament, but then again, he was alone. Such a lonely life where he could die, and no one would know until late. “Just take me already and let me rest.” With that, he fell asleep.

The next moment he woke up, the sky was still dark. He realized he didn´t know at what time he made it back home, neither when he gave the meds to the wounded man. Cursing under his breath, he stood up from the uncomfortable pose in which he slept, to go check on the handsome man.

At least, or unfortunately, he was still there. He brought his backpack to the side of the bed, so he could find it if he would wake up when he wasn’t around. It wasn’t particularly heavy or full, it could have a change of clothes for the form it had or even a pillow, he wasn’t curious about it, and he didn’t like prying into other people’s things, even with their permission, so he just left it there.

The brow of the man looked a tiny bit less furrowed, which was a sign the meds were working or that he could be a bad-tempered guy. Not his concern in that moment, so he went back to try to sleep some more, his phone said it was still six in the morning, too early to try to hug thighs for him to live another day.

Yawning, he went back to his sofa, almost crying because he knew how uncomfortable it was, he hated every time he had fallen asleep while watching the TV, just to wake up sore and grumpy. Nevertheless, this time there was no other option besides sleeping in the cold floor, which made him realize how useful the rugs were. Those were his sloppy thoughts when he gave up to exhaustion.

There was nothing that hated the most than waking up so many times before his awakening hour. It was awful when it happened during the night, almost opening his eyes every hour or more, but now that it was almost eight, he had to stood up and give up on resting properly on Saturday!

The man in his bed was still sleeping, so he just went to the kitchen to decide what his breakfast would be. Usually on weekends he would have some eggs or sandwiches, but he wasn’t feeling that hungry, therefore he just made some coffee and chewed some cookies absent-mindedly until he heard noise coming from his room. The fated hour could have finally arrived.

If his place weren’t that quiet, he maybe couldn’t have listened to the other man when he groaned in pain. For sure he forgot about his injury and tried to move or stand up. Shang Qinghua didn’t run, he only filled another glass of water and took it with him to see the nameless man, hoping he could made him go. Maybe annoying him until he called back to his friend to take him out of there, people tended to say how annoying he was, right?

“Hi, you…” handsome man was glued to his tongue when the eyes of that tall man were fixed in his. He certainly looked annoyed, but more the confused kind, which reduced, like a lot, his moody expression and made him seem like someone younger and more vulnerable. At least for some really short seconds before he turned in an icy man that could kill with his eyes, if that were possible. Shang Qinghua had to clear his throat so he wouldn’t spill all the bullshit he kind of prepared to anger him, now that he knew it could be as dangerous as letting the other man investigate him.

“It’s time for you medicine…” he was able to articulate while walking towards him. The taller man watched him as if warning him not to get too close, so Shang Qinghua almost stopped at three feet from where he handed over the glass and the boxes. “He said one of each.”

“Who?” his voice was as deep as he remembered, but a lot more cold than last night.

“Your coworker? I don’t know who he is, he just told me to take care of you either in your home or in mine, I didn’t have any other choice, of course I didn’t want to be trapped in some stranger’s place, so I told him mine…”

“Shut up.” When Shang Qinghua rose his eyes to watch him, he had the most annoyed expression he had seen in years, so he shut it right away, still with his arms extended to give the meds. The man rubbed his temples with his hand, clearly, he had a headache, and who wouldn’t after what happened.

He took his time before sighing and taking what was offered to him. He checked the boxes to know what it was, then he followed the instructions. He left the glass in the nightstand and took out his phone, Shang Qinghua bit his lips, picked up the glass and almost ran away from there. That man was even scarier than the other one, now that he was awake.

He knew about men and women of bad temper, his mother was the first, some “exes” were next, if he was supposed to call them that even if they were only fuck buddies. Yes, he used to have a sexual life, incredible but useful.

He reviewed his food supplies, if the man decided to stay, what he had stored wouldn’t be useful to make a light meal, he needed to go to the grocery store for some iron replenishing snacks or something. Were those sold in the grocery store or the pharmacy? Would they be expensive? Instantly he checked his bank account, it had the last bits needed for his own food for the rest of the month, if he were to keep being such a remarkable and kind human being, he would be having one meal per day until the next paycheck.

It wouldn’t be his first time doing it, the first months of his graduated life went like that, so he could do it once more. Unless that unknown man were to pay or something for him nursing him back to health. Sure, keep dreaming, Qinghua.

“Hey, you.” The voice from the taller man came again, it wasn’t a shout, but it was pretty obvious it was him who he was calling to.

“Coming!” But he did shout. He wasn´t that close to him to annoy him more, was he?

“I want to take a shower,” was the only thing he said.

“Sure… let me help you walk to the bathroom…” The man stood up by himself, but his legs quickly seem to give up at the pain coming from his wound. This time, he didn’t make a sound, only his brows made it obvious. With a hand at his waist, avoiding where the pain came from, and the heavy and long arm of the nameless man over his shoulders, he walked him into the bathroom, which suddenly seemed too small with someone so tall. “I’m sorry that this is so… tight, would you be okay by yourself?”

Not that he wanted to see him naked, well he indeed wanted, but he was sure that the other wouldn’t like it. Besides, if he were to fall more into the perfect man he was, he wouldn’t be able to forget him later. So it was a no, which the other man agreed to, although for completely different reasons.

Shang Qinghua went back to the kitchen, now he was worrying even more about what to do for the other man if he were to demand for food. He racked the deeper part of his cupboard until he found a closed pack of rice which almost shone as a blessed treasure. Without losing time, he searched for recipes of easy-to-digest food, deciding to leave the rice soaking while preparing some hardboiled eggs, his last four eggs.

His excitement after finding the rice came to a stop when he realized how enthusiastic he was feeling for a breakfast that wasn’t for him. He never thought about himself being good to take care of others… He shouldn’t get used to it, to having someone.

When he noticed the shower coming to a stop, he got ready to the moment the door was opened. Was he being an ass-kisser too obviously, or it was still normal? Whatever the answer to that, he loved more his life over what the other might thought for all that.

The man was wearing a white t-shirt and some skinny jeans, if he were to use a black leather jacket, he would look even more gorgeous. But no, he was a dangerous wounded man, Shang Qinghua only helped him walk back to the bed without saying nothing, hoping that his face didn’t expose any of his dirty thoughts or his life could be getting shorter.

“Give me your password” was the only thing the man told him, showing him his phone’s screen that was in the wi-fi connection. Was the word please too hard to say? Shang Qinghua sighed while tapping it. “And I’m hungry.”

“About that… I don’t have too much food; I only have eggs and I recently found some rice…” he said while walking out the room to bring the plate. Now it looked too empty and dull, but it wasn’t his fault that some maniac decided to leave at his care a wounded stranger out of the blue. He gave the other man the four open hardboiled eggs and a cup of tea.

And he was disappointed. He was looking at the eggs as if Shang Qinghua just gave him some rotten vegetables or something more disgusting, making him scream internally. “I’m so sorry, I really am, but that’s all I have, that’s the true, I don’t usually cook, and I do the groceries until late today… I still can go and buy something, that was my intention, I swear and…”

“Shut up.” A pillow hit him right in the face, leaving him so confused. “Why do you talk so much? Get out.” And then he bit one of the eggs, it could be a funny sight because of his annoyed face, but Shang Qinghua couldn’t laugh when his bad mood could get worse. So he ran away out, as if that wasn’t his own room.

He wanted to cry. He saved such a mean and scary person, he, who was such a useless coward and now he wasn’t even sure how to keep himself alive. He was annoying by nature; he couldn’t change it after so many years of trying. Even if he were angry for the mean treatment given by the other man, he was too scared to defend himself. And all his life it had been the same, that’s why he was bullied since his early childhood, maybe that’s why the other man left his man in his care, because it was written in all his face how easy it was to take advantage of him.

He screamed into the pillow that hit his face, and the one he caught without noticing. Which was a bad idea, that pillow was impregnated with that nameless man’s colony. And it was delicious.

Chapter Text

His doorbell rang, it wasn’t normal for him to hear it more than once in a week, not even in a month! He wasn’t able to ask for things online because he didn’t have money to spent on himself, neither he had mail to receive that wasn’t via internet, and the landlord never came, he had to go downstairs to talk to him if needed or just made the bank transfer.

But of course, the one he saw was the same man who yesterday imposed the care of his friend to him. “Hey, how’s going? Did he thank you already?” He was laughing, knowing too well how the other was. Shang Qinghua wasn’t in the mood for jokes, even if that man could make scary threats, the more fearsome was the one inside, so he was about to move to let him enter and stop having to deal with him. “Nah, I won’t enter, I just came to deliver his clothes and things that he asked for.”

“Why do you think you can trust that I’m not a danger to him?” while receiving the bag, he decided to ask, not anyone would leave his friend that way. Right?

“You a danger? To him? How?” He burst into laughter; he was even holding his sides. At that, he may be right, he would never look threatening; then again, that was what made people to bully him. And now here he was giving to the other one a reason to do it. “Oh man, that was a good one, thank you,” finally he said while drying his tears. “You realize he works in security, right? Do you think you could have a chance?”

“Well, he’s hurt and, even unhurt, the other man was able to stab him.” Can you shut up and go back inside? Just shut the door at his stupid face, damn it. He berated himself internally.

“Oh that was his mistake, he’ll learn from it now, we always told him to be watchful of anything, so this is his lesson.” With a shrug of his shoulders, he began to walk away. Or either he truly had other things to do, or what happened really bothered him. Still, Shang Qinghua didn’t want to know, didn’t care.

He went back to his room, to leave the bag over the bed. The other man was looking at his phone, and the plate that had the eggs was now empty, along with the cup of tea. Remaining in silence, as per the king’s order, he picked up the dishes and went out again. Now he could finally go out to the grocery store and rant along the way.

He prepared a list of useful things before going out, now he just needed to carefully chose everything to not go over the budget. Even if he had to use what little he had saved, he would try to have whatever needed for him to recover quickly and get out his life. And because he still wanted to hug his tights so he could live another day, or month.

The fresher the food, the expensive it was. Which reminded him why he stopped buying healthy food. Still, he managed to buy “good enough” and quite simple things to cook for a week until his next paycheck arrived. Maybe if he could write some extra chapter or side-story worthy, he could buy food for himself, meanwhile, a cup of instant noodles by day would be his only meal. So lame.

Back into his place, the nameless man apparently made his way to the sofa to watch TV. If it were hard or not, it wasn’t Shang Qinghua’s problem, better if it weren’t that hard, it would only mean that they were close to part ways.

Determined to keep his mouth shut, he walked to the kitchen, his mind was even now looking for any hidden plot he had for his novel, while putting away the groceries. Since the beginning, he wanted to make a side-story for his favorite character in all the novel, who wasn’t the main character, but a secondary who barely received attention from his readers. In fact, he wrote him to be that hidden because he didn’t want the hate to touch him, not even the horniness from his female readers; he liked that character so much that he was even tempted to not make him appear at all.

If he were to focus that side-story on him, then every effort he put on hiding him would be wasted. He could maybe make a little appearance, made the story centered in some adventure with some new wife and the protagonist while that other character just helps for a bit. Was it too risky? He would need to plot it carefully, if he were lucky, he could be the only one to pay attention to him. And the few readers who were asking for more info about him, people he tended to ignore.

Every time he was really focused on plotting for his novel, he would forget about everything outside, he would move as in automatic to drink water when the thirst couldn’t be overlooked anymore, the same to when the need to the bathroom was there. That way his weekends could be wasted easily, except that this time a bothersome alarm took him out of it when the reminder of the medicine came.

At first, he was confused because he hadn’t bought medicine for him in months, maybe years, until he saw his TV on, and the silhouette seated in front of it. With his mind now clearer, he rose up quickly to fill the glass and went for the boxes left in the room, just to present them to the spoiled and mean man under his care. Was he a man or a child? Anyway, he was relieved that he decided to use his phone to remind him about the meds.

And maybe the childish one was him because he didn’t want to talk to that nameless man. Now it wasn’t out of fear, instead, it was a voiceless protest against his ungratefulness. He knew very well that the other couldn’t care less, still it was a little satisfactory for himself.

Because he had lived alone since his high school’s first year, he was used to the quietness of his place. Sometimes he used music to fill it, or his own voice when he was focused in his story’s development, but it was more mumbling that actually talking to himself, according to what he heard about himself through the few roommates he had in college before any of them changed room.

So it wasn’t especially hard for him to keep his muteness. Still helping him whenever he asked like going to the bathroom or going back to the bedroom, just like in that moment. After leaving him next to the bed, he walked outside to prepare the next meal for the nameless man, his mind without leaving the plot line he had since morning in his head.

Once ready, he left it on the nightstand along with the tea, he barely saw the disappointed face in the other while walking towards his closet, looking for his comfy clothes and a new towel to finally take a bath. He left his clothes on the sofa, and went back to his laptop. He was words behind of what he needed, so his bath and everything would wait longer.

His normal days used to be like that, anyway, with or without a stranger in his house. Most of his free time was used in his novel, even when he wasn’t seated in front of his computer. He always neglected himself, eating until late in the day or night, bathing until Sunday, doing laundry until Sunday morning and cleaning almost every two weeks, if the house was lucky enough to find him in a good mood, and his grocery shopping always depended on how much he had left from the week.

So him eating that Saturday until nine o’clock was normal, he bathing that day was only because the previous day he couldn’t do it, and he scrubbed someone else’s clothes to clean off the blood stains at nine thirty. He used home-made recipes he found on internet, which was useful to his writer experience, he wasn’t sure if the man would like to still use those clothes, still he made the effort. The stain in his white shirt only faded to a dim yellow stain, while the pant and jacket’s stains were a bit concealed, so no questions were to be made when he took it to the dry cleaning the next day. Then he took his well-deserved bath to make easier his rest in the cursed sofa.

His Sunday was pretty much the same, except that he had to do the laundry in the morning and the cleaning of his room while the moody man was bathing, then he did the rest of his apartment really fast so he could go back to his novel.

His breakfast’s cookies were gone on Sunday, so he had to steal a spoon of the wounded man’s breakfast, as if it weren’t bought with his own money, before going to work. Although it was still early, he heated the breakfast and left it in the nightstand, when he noticed the man awake, he shook the medicine boxes to silently remind him to take them.

Because that Monday went smoothly, with barely any back luck in his path, he thought that maybe his week could be a decent one if he were to ignore his new diet. However, it only got worse.

At work, his collages that were his seniors, were giving him more work of what he thought it should be normal for someone so new. Yes, he was a quick learner and worker, he never left any report until the last minute, he always tried to leave everything done and reviewed a day prior scheduled to be handed over. The only moment when he wasted time was a few minutes before the end of the day, and only if he really didn’t have anything pending.

And while he was all the time in front of his job’s computer, his coworkers went here and there, talked to each other and wasted a lot of time when their boss wasn’t looking. It was unfair, because of it sometimes he had to do overtime, which didn’t leave any considerable extra pay.

While at his home, he wasn’t able to rest properly with his uninvited and unknown guest. Day by day he became more annoying when criticizing the food ingredients and portions, or how he needed to walk to the sofa to watch TV because he didn’t have it on his bedroom or how the bathroom was too far away from the bedroom and that Shang Qinghua arrived too late, so he had to heat his own meal and so on.

He didn’t say it directly towards him, as if ordering for it to be fixed, but still the comments were irritating. While the first time Shang Qinghua only thought: Then scram! That Wednesday he was at his limit.

He was sure that his coworkers were taking advantage of him without any way of telling his boss, who was yelling at him because, lately, he made some mistakes on his reports; and those mistakes were because he was hungry. His diet of one noodle cup wasn’t enough as before, he never thought that moving through public transportation and his job would consume so much energy for him to be a bit lightheaded after two in the afternoon. He should had known but he pretended he didn’t.

The first thing he heard when he came home, late again, with a horrible headache and queasy stomach, was that man’s “I want meat”. He couldn’t keep it with his silent protest, he wasn’t in the mood, so he finally exploded.

“Congrats, buy it by yourself!” he shouted right away. “I don’t have the money for it, I can’t cook anything else because my fucking job barely helps me sustain myself. I’ve seen you’re looking better, so do something for yourself, you damn spoiled brat, or go back to whatever rich house you came from, because this is the shitty life of a shitty poor man, and if it’s not of your taste, then there’s the door.”

Throwing his suitcase to the floor, he walked to his uncomfortable sofa while undoing his tie and pulling out his belt to throw them too, before laying down in the sofa with his face towards the back of it. He was too tired to care what the other might do or say, he closed his eyes and fell asleep.

The next time he opened his eyes was still dark, his phone showed it was around four in the morning. His stolen bedroom’s door was slightly closed, meaning that the nameless man hadn’t gone yet. He wanted to be scared, he knew he should be, because he just yelled to a dangerous man as if he was any other person, but he didn’t have energy for it. Instead, he was about to ask to be beaten to death, so he didn’t have to suffer because money.

When his alarm went off, he woke up feeling even more sluggish. He reached to his phone, which was in the floor after falling from his hands, and saw it was fifteen minutes late of his normal awakening hour. He jumped out of the sofa and ran towards the bathroom to the quickest shower he ever had. Somewhere in the night he changed his suit for his comfortable t-shirt and his small shorts, the outfit he normally used on weekends and to sleep.

Without a second to lose, he went to the kitchen. He didn’t have the time to cook the other man’s breakfast, so he only wrote some quick instructions on a piece of paper, took a spoonful of the cold rice and begun his race to his job.

Only because he was feeling a bit dizzy, he decided to buy some energy bars from a convenience store in his way to the train. He had to use the tiny amount he earned with his latest chapters, which he was saving to buy a precious sleeping bag that could help his pained back and neck. It was kind of an emergency, nothing much he could do.

Shang Qinghua arrived at his job’s building six minutes pass his entry hour, he was still safe even though he was feeling less energetic than yesterday, as if the bars did nothing to help him. Still, he did his job as any other day.

Until the end of the day, in which he miraculously didn’t had to do more extra hours, he gave up and accepted that he caught a cold. Although, when he was jobless or studying, he never had a weak body; now with all the stress and low quality in his food, the cool breeze that entered from the window he forgot to close yesterday, when the night wasn’t that cold, was enough to make him sick.

He went home, almost, praying that his body could fight the virus on its own through the night. This time he would make sure to take a warm bath, close every window, eat before sleeping, even if it was not healthy enough food, and cover himself with sheets.

Yet, his fortune was not good. It was finally Friday, since the day before he was saying he only needed to endure one more day. This time his phone’s alarm wasn’t sufficiently noisy, he was awoken by someone calling him while shaking his shoulder. With bleary eyes, he noticed it was the nameless man.

His first feeling was fear. He rose up so quick that all his world spun around until he was on the sofa again. Despite the weakness, he took his phone to see that he was even more late that the day before. He started changing his clothes, completely forgetting about the quiet man; he took a mask from the bathroom while making sure his hair didn’t look as bad as his face and ran towards the door. He negligibly heard a Hey or a Wait, coming from the other man, however he was quite sure it was his imagination.

That day, although munching two energy bars, he arrived at his workplace even more exhausted than the previous day. The clock marked almost twenty minutes pass his entry hour when he seated in his place and turned on his computer to begin his work, hoping for the day to run fast so he could feel even worse through the weekend.

Chapter Text

“-hua… -inghua… Shang Qinghua!” When he was beginning to take his eyes off the screen because the voice ringing in his ears, a strong hit came from the front desk, making him jump and see his boss in that place.

“Boss! Sorry! Were you calling me?” he still dared to ask, even if the face of his boss was as mad as hell, but he wasn’t thinking straight anymore. He staggered a tad, but hold himself from his own desk.

“Your damn coughing doesn’t let anyone concentrate in their jobs, go to the infirmary or go home.” The man turned around to leave. “Stupid people that doesn’t know how to take care of themselves and are selfishly bothering the rest.”

Truth to be told, he was already feeling worse. At the infirmary they told him he had a high fever so he should rest, because it was already two o’clock, it was better for him to go home. The doctor made him take a pill for the symptoms and gave another for him to take when arriving to his house after eating something, it was the kind of meds that made people sleepy, so he couldn’t take it before.

After explaining to his boss what he was told, and reassuring that he didn’t had any pending reports, he gathered his things up, turned off his computer and left the office. His boss must have seen him really bad to told him to piss off on Friday, so maybe he wasn’t as heartless as he looked, although really rude.

He wasn’t particularly happy of going home early, his energy wouldn’t be enough if he had to give any kind of explanation to the nameless man or if he had to make him dinner. But he really needed to sleep and rest, his head was spinning faster with each step he took towards his place.

Taking a deep breath, he opened the door to his apartment. There was not noise coming from inside, when walking to the main room, he found it empty. He almost felt recovering his house’s happiness until he saw the man coming out of his room.

Sighing, Shang Qinghua walked to his kitchen to let some water boil while he untied his belt and tie, this time he wanted to hide from the other man, who was still silently standing at the bedroom’s door, which was starting bother him.

Until he was pouring the water to his delicious noodles, the man finally talked: “There’s still food in the microwave.”

“Why? Does his highness didn’t know how to cook or…?”

“It’s for you.” He interrupted Shang Qinghua while crossing his arms over his chest and rising one brow.

“… You’re the wounded here and there’s not much, if not any, food left for today’s dinner, and I have my own delicious food,” he rose his cup of noodles as if he were making a toast. After that, he walked to the bathroom to change his clothes and brought a little bowl with water and a pair of white clothes to use on his burning forehead.

“That’s not food,” the man spoke when he went back to his instant noodles.

“Works for me” and all the people who didn’t born with a silver spoon, Shang Qinghua answered, and only thought the rest, his damned good manners stopped him from being rude towards someone that, apparently, was trying to be nice with him, which was as bad as people being mean to him.

“You’re sick, aren’t you? You should…”

“OK, stop.” The medicine he received from the office’s doctor was losing effect, he really wanted to finish his useless meal and sleep in his awful couch, but that man was still being too persistent in whatever intentions he had. Plus, every time someone showed a bit of concern or interests towards him, he would always become a clingy and talkative guy until the other people got annoyed and left, many of them using words and actions worse than the people who hated him from the beginning. He promised himself not to fall by any show of care, again.

And the only way he could think to prevent any more pity from the nameless man was to be the asshole he hated so much. “I already know how an idiot I am for being sick when I were supposed to be taking care of someone, I know how useless I am that I can’t even take care of myself, and how I think only in myself and all of that, so I don’t need anyone to show me all my mistakes, thank you.” He ate almost half of the noodles until he felt nauseous, so he used the broth to, unhealthily, take the pill for his cold.

“Sorry that my useless care-taking services won’t be given today, hopefully tomorrow I’ll keep being a disgrace or whatever shitty adjective you wanna give.” Without any other word or look towards the other man, Shang Qinghua laid down in his couch with the wet cloth over his forehead and his back to his stolen bedroom.

He woke up constantly to change the warmed cloth to the cooler one; even if he didn’t get sick that easily, he was used to tend himself. His body was used to it and the medicine made wonders because in the morning of the next day, he was feeling a tad less weak.

It was almost ten in the morning when he rose up, although he was still feeling sick, his head and body hurt less. He walked to the kitchen to inspect the fridge and the cupboard because he was right, the food and ingredients were gone already. It was a bad idea to let the wounded man cook, but it was just the two days he had to do overtime.

With or without food, the travel to the outside world was a must, he needed to buy his medicine, which never before was a need but he didn’t want to keep being that pathetic man he currently was. That way, he took a refreshing bath and changed to his going-out outfit, which was only some skinny and wore down jeans, and a sweatshirt one size bigger.

When he came out, still drying his hair, the nameless man was standing in his bedroom’s door. “I’m going out to do the groceries, sorry that breakfast will be done until I’m back.” Now that he wasn’t keeping his quiet tantrum, he felt more like himself.

The other man watched him for some long seconds without saying anything until Shang Qinghua was tossing his towel and picking up his shopping bag. “Give me your bank account code.”

The request left Shang Qinghua looking at the other man as if he became dumb. Was he trying to take money from him? Was he not clear enough about his low money income? “Are you deaf? Give it.” He still didn’t know what he should expect from him, but if he were the spoiled guy, he looked like, his order could only be for him to finally pay for his stay and food. Right?

Trying to not anger him more, Shang Qinghua showed the code needed for a transfer. When the nameless man didn’t complaint, he sighed relieved. “Buy meat and more ingredients, I don’t like spicy”. Shang Qinghua didn’t ask questions or commented, only took back his phone, his keys and left.

Until he was a distance away from his apartment’s building, he looked at his bank account. He stopped walking the moment the numbers were shown and gasped. It was almost the same amount of money his job paid him for a month’s work! Was the security job that well paid, or he really was from a rich family?

Whichever was the source, he just couldn’t go and use everything. Sometimes he really wished he were more like the Shang Qinghua he wrote in his novel, someone that cunning and traitorous, that way he could take revenge from all the people who had been nasty towards him. And, like in that moment, maybe he would prefer to use all that money and buy things he didn’t need. But he wasn’t him, not even close in personality.

Because of that, he really bought better ingredients and some meat, but never picking up anything before looking at the tag price. In the notes of his phone, he had all the things he needed with the price, so he could sum at the end and predict the final bill. Shang Qinghua wanted to give back all the extra left.

His old shopping bag wasn’t enough to all that he was able to buy. Although he really picked only edible and healthy things, besides his instant noodles and medicine that he bought apart. He had to buy a new shopping bag to fit everything. So when he arrived home, he was as exhausted as last day.

The nameless man was watching TV on his sofa, Shang Qinghua walked to the kitchen to put away the groceries and start preparing the late breakfast, more like a lunch with how late it was.

“What are you gonna eat?” asked the other man after receiving his dish from Shang Qinghua, which surprised him for some seconds until he pointed to the kitchen.

“The same? I bought my part of groceries on my own, so I can give you back the money that’s left of what you gave me.” When he was about to take out his phone, the other shook his head and began to eat.

“I’m not asking for it to be returned.”

Shang Qinghua formed like ten answers, but he decided to no argue about it in that moment, that money could be used to anything that man needed through the week or to buy the groceries for the next weekend, if he was still there. So he just shrugged and went to the kitchen for his own food to sit in his table. It wasn’t long when the other man joined.

“Tell me something, why do you think I come from a rich family?” That the man came to sit in front of him was surprising enough, but him being the first to talk, and it not being any order, was something that left Shang Qinghua with his fork in front of his mouth for some seconds before reacting.

“It’s not obvious?” His question wasn’t answered, the other man only watched him through his eyelashes, black, long and full eyelashes, while eating. “Well for instance, you criticized my food and what I gave you, which in my world of poverty is considered as mild and easy-to-digest food, and you were quite upset of my apartment being so small, which makes it cheap, and that amount you gave me just to do the groceries is too much for a normal person. Either your security job really pays the bills and more or your family gives you a good allowance. But I supposed with how risky the security job is, the pay can’t be low.”

“I provide for myself.”

“Oh! And that’s other thing, you don’t talk like someone like your roommate, you’re proper and I bet you use a lot of fancy words.” He pointed at him with his chopsticks, noticing a really quick look of disapproval from the other man. The reason he changed it so quickly must be because he didn’t want to show more of his rich boy façade.

“You don’t talk bad either.” At that, Shang Qinghua didn’t have anything to reply, he could use his excuse about being a writer, no one with a lack of vocabulary could have a famous story like his. Nonetheless, explaining everything about his hobby as a writer was a big NOPE, first because the most “liked” of his novel were the sex scenes, not the plot; and second, it was embarrassing having someone he could see, know about it.

“Yeah, I went to college and read a lot.” He decided to say in the end. No one was listening so no prides were hurt. Unless the other man decided to feel offended. However, he just hummed and keep eating, no doing any more questions. So he thought.

“Thanks for the food, Shang Qinghua.” And now he almost chocked with his food when hearing his name coming from him. He totally forgot the other could see his name when doing the bank transfer. At first it was weird to hear his name in his beautiful voice, then he couldn’t bear the embarrassment for not knowing his name, even if it wasn’t his fault.

“And… what’s your name?” He was fairly sure that his receipt of the transfer didn’t had his name, or at least he could pretend not to know how to read it, even if the other knew how. Surely, he was an idiot at the other man’s eyes, another motive to evince himself was the same as none.

“Mo Bei.”

Shang Qinghua’s tea came out from his mouth and nose after hearing his name, making a fool of himself while coughing and trying to clean his mess.

“What’s wrong with you?” That man seemed really pissed off with his reaction, either the disgusting water coming out from him or how exaggerated looked to him.

“Sorry…” Shang Qinghua said, using a napkin to dry his face. “It’s just that your name… it’s almost the same as… someone…” he laughed nervously before going back to eat in silence.

One thing was that he had the most beautiful body he had ever seen, a body he always dreamed of seeing and imagined one of his characters as him. However, he not only having the body but a similar name to that character he loved too much and used to portrait his ideal man was something out of this world. Impossible! Was he a girl in a girl’s story? Now he wanted him out of his life before any disaster may occur, and that was referring himself and his loneliness and hardened heart.

Mo Bei was looking at him as if analyzing him, not believing his reasons were worth his reaction. “So… how do you write it? Ah! Let me take a piece of paper.”

He used the excuse to stand up and try stilling his expressions. After sitting down, he let the other man wrote his name. One of the characters were the same but the other wasn’t, which made him sigh in relief internally.

They didn’t spoke much after that, once their plates were empty, Shang Qinghua picked them up and wash them. Until then, he remembered he had a cold, it was as if his weird and short conversation with Mo Bei distracted enough to not notice his fever going up, thinking all it was because the big revelation of his name.

He took his medicine and went back to the table to keep writing that extra story he needed. He saw Mo Bei siting back at his couch to watch TV and keep staring without noticing for some minutes. It was obvious that concentrating was meant to be a formidable challenge that day.

Chapter Text

The next days after their formal introduction, they didn’t talk much, just exchanging questions here and there, mostly things about Shang QInghua’s unhealthy and poor choices in his lifestyle. To say that he never felt offended was a lie, more often than not, Shang Qinghua ended all the conversations nagging him for being so spoiled and with Mo Bei shutting him up with a command or, sometimes, with an icy look.

They were opposites. While Shang Qinghua could talk, more nonsense and critiques than anything else, for hours; Mo Bei spoke with only the necessary and hated when the other was making his crazy or petty assumptions.

Still, they could be in peace in the same room without disturbing each other. Not that Shang Qinghua was paying any attention when he started to throw up words from his fingers, writing at some supernatural speed for hours. Sometimes, when he detached his eyes from the screen, he would realize that Mo Bei moved back to the bedroom without him noticing.

The wound at his side, the last time he allowed Shang Qinghua to check, it was looking good. The inflammation on the borders was giving up, and so the pain coming from it; it was clean and fading slowly. When Mo Bei called his coworker, who actually was his roommate, he told him to remove the stitches on Monday if he were feeling like it was really closed or any other day that didn’t went over the next Saturday, because it would be harder and painful to do so.

In the end, they decided to leave it until Tuesday, the day he didn’t had to do overtime. With his house’s tools and a lot of courage from Shang Qinghua, he was able to remove all of them while Mo Bei didn’t show any pain if he had felt it. Which kind of gave a bit of ease, thinking that he wasn’t as bad as he thought he would.

Shang Qinghua, against all his desires, was starting to feel comfortable with someone around his house. He wasn’t startled anymore when he lost focus in his story whenever the restroom’s noise was heard or the other man’s steps, or the times he lost himself in his computer so much that the other man had to make the meal of the day.

It wasn’t much, but it was a lot more than when he lived with his mother after his father left them. She was only around late at night, every single day, so it was practically as if he were living alone, and whenever she decided to stay, she would be in the living room and he in his room. He was a sensitive person, he didn’t need words to kind of get the other people feelings; he knew his mother didn’t want to be at home, with him, but with Mo Bei he never sensed any feelings. Emptiness was far better than annoyance.

Nevertheless, he constantly reprimanded himself for thinking about it. Shang Qinghua forced his brain, every time those thoughts surfaced, to only focus on his novel; always telling himself how that man would walk away one day or another and never meet again.

Feeling a pang in his heart, he returned his eyes to his screen, noticing a mail had arrived from the web page where his novel was published. On that, kind of gloomy, Wednesday, he received a petition from the page to give his contact information to a company in charge of some novel’s official audio dramas.

He stood from his chair with his eyes open wide, reading again and again the mail to know if he was reading right. That was a big opportunity, not for him to be famous, but for him to earn more money. It might not be enough to leave his current job, of course, but at least he would feel less stressed with money and debts, only by a little.

He answered immediately, he even went to the said produce company website to know which famous novels they had. He found he had heard of some and felt it even more impossible.

Soon all his happiness was crushed when he thought about what his readers and haters said. The story at the beginning may had been good, but the latest chapters were more like a porno movie than a true story. If that audio drama would come to be true, it would turn to be just moaning and some dirty talk, with little to nothing context or plot. Was that even possible to pass the censorship? And now he was full of doubts, maybe they could change some parts and omit a lot from the final. Even he could write a true final for the novel, the one he had in mind since months ago but didn’t use, yet, while trying to exploit every part of it until it didn’t make any more money.

The mail from the company came until late on Friday. They were clear and concise, explaining their intentions with his story, talking about hiding most of those sex scenes to center more on the story, which they considered interesting by itself. He almost cried real tears when reading that, they understood his story! And, too, something about wishing to hear if he had any voice recommendations; it was still early to go there, but the faster they had cast choices, the faster the development could go when needed.

Without delay, he replied completely agreeing at their intentions, he even was bold enough to told them that he could help them writing or checking the script, even making extra chapters to characters that weren’t fully developed in the story, due to the lack of interest in his common readers. He had almost all the pasts for many of the characters, even for the canon fodders like Liu Qingge, Shang Qinghua or some demons. Even for many of Luo Binghe’s wives that were more than a beautiful face.

He hoped, that with the censorship as his ally, he could give a second chance to his plot, focus more on story rather than sex. Of course, they’ll have to leave some of it because it was what the fans paid more attention to, but that would be the company’s job to worry about.

As for the voices, he was totally clueless. He rarely listened to those audio dramas, because his favorite novels didn’t have, although he heard parts when their readers share some in the forums or to the comment section. Therefore, he would need to hear the most popular, or not that popular, voices and try to imagine his own characters speaking, which wouldn’t be easy either.

Some writers loved to show playlist with their songs for their story, he never did it, never felt like knowing how to do it. So with the voices it was the same, even when people were beyond and thought about dream cast, he was as clueless as with the voices. Like if he didn’t fully saw them as real, except for one.

“What creepy thing are you watching that have you changing from so many emotions?” Mo Bei’s low voice cut all his thought’s as if those were inside of a bubble. That tall and perfect man was looking at him from the kitchen where he was drinking a glass of water.

“Oh… um… nothing, it was just some news about a show?” It didn’t make much sense, but Mo Bei was used to it, and because he never cared, in the first place, he didn’t inquire more about it. Then an idea popped up in his head, the idea of using Mo Bei’s voice for his Mobei-Jun.

Shang Qinghua debated between telling Mo Bei first or the producer company. He needed to know if he could do a proposition about using someone who hadn’t done any voice acting before, at least his character would be someone that barely talks, if he were to keep him hidden. However, if he asked first to Mo Bei and they didn’t approve it, then the disappointment would be in Mo Bei, if he were to accept. With a sigh, he decided to consult first with the company. Then he would decide how to tell that cold man.

The dialogues his Mobei-Jun had in his novel were a few, luckily something like ten with no more than one sentence. He was the right-hand man of his protagonist and, yet he was barely seen because Luo Binghe could do everything by himself, only needing of the ice demon when having to be in two places at the same time. And that was before he officially formed his harem, because his wives were his adventure’s companions, leaving now the icy man more like a background character. And all because he cared too much of him.

Even someone as cold and expressionless as Mo Bei, could do something as simple as agreeing some orders or giving a few advises to his boss. Nothing that needed of him being overly expressive. So Mo Bei shouldn’t reject his first and only favor, right? Plus, he would earn a bit of money with it. As if he needed it.

Either way, he waited for his quesion’s answer all day. Which received in the evening. They told him they could give the chance to his friend (which themselves assumed, he didn’t call it like that) if they considered the lines not so difficult and if his friend were to pass the audition. They couldn’t give him any priority over professionals if any other were to try auditioning.

At least it wasn’t a no, but he still needed to warn Mo Bei, if he were to accept!

Now he was nervous to the extreme, almost as if he were about to go in front of the classroom to give a presentation. The opportunity never arose that day, he considered not telling him until there was more development of the chapters and the whole project, the voices were still far from needed, so there was no rush yet. But that was his second week at his house, it could be that in any given moment, he would decide to go back to his own place.

Yes, Mo Bei was quite comfortable using someone else’s bed, and being with someone as dull as him, but that didn’t mean that he was planning on staying forever. He had already told him that his friend tricked him about the threat of looking for his information, and that he manipulated him from the beginning when he asked to go to Mo Bei’s house to take care of him. Because Mo Bei’s house was his, and he didn’t have any intention of having them both there, and he knew Shang Qinghua would prefer to go to his own home, with or without Mo Bei.

“Yeah, he knows how to manipulate people to do what he wants,” had told him when he asked if his friend was out of his mind. “And besides, he told me he knew you, from afar but he knew some things you did in the past, but he didn’t tell me what. Who knows if that was true or not.”

Although it seemed that Mo Bei didn’t trust completely his friend, he never showed any hatred or loathe towards him, except for the time that they tended to fight because his friend always brought a different woman almost every week. To Mo Bei it was bothersome to hear them had sex at the living room, the kitchen, the bathroom or his friend’s room; both always had to pretend the other wasn’t around.

Maybe that was what made him stay longer, even if his wound was out of danger already. He still had some days left off his job, but he was starting to miss it, or so Shang Qinghua was thinking because the times he heard Mo Bei talking to his friend or his boss to ask how things were going there.

Afraid of not being able to have his beautiful voice used in his favorite character, he gathered all the courage he could find on himself and decided to ask before going to the grocery shopping.

“So… do you really make a lot as a security thug?” Overcoming all the nervous responses of his body, like his sweaty hands and his loud heart beating, he finally asked the question. Almost wishing Mo Bei were too focused on his phone. When he noticed him turning around a bit to look at him, Shang Qinghua walked towards the sofa and seated on its’ arm.

“Why?” Mo Bei looked at him, at his small and weak body, it was all written in his face. “They wouldn’t hire you.”

“Of course they wouldn’t,” Shang Qinghua protested, trying to swallow all the bad comments he had at the tip of his tongue, his remark and glare were so rude! “Well how about you making some extra money?”

Mo Bei returned his eyes to his phone, but when he heard that, he looked at him again. This time the way he traced all his body, it was different from the one before. With the first one, it was in a mockingly way, as if he had already imagined in the security job being pushed by the ones he should be pushing out. But now, he was looking at him with some kind of animadvert on him.

It was clearer than water for Shang Qinghua, even if that man was so cold and wooden. Although he didn’t catch the reason, it was obvious that Mo Bei thought that he was about to propose to sleep with him for money. All was written in his eyes and the hidden disgust.

“What the actual fuck are you thinking?” Shang Qinghua Stood up as if the place where he was seated was on fire. He didn’t even know what to say, it was such an illogical conclusion and out of nowhere, until something hit his memories. His friend had told him that he knew about something he did in the past, and his past from middle, high school and college were kind of clean. He used to be much of a ghost to any to put attention to him, but he neither did things too out of the ordinary for someone as gloomy as him. So what was left? His seven jobless months.

Only then he kind of understood his expression. He said his friend didn’t tell him and that he wasn’t believing everything he told, but still something must had had implied if his thoughts went that way for a simple question about earning more money.

“Forget it.” Half embarrassed and half upset, Shang Qinghua went to the bathroom to change his clothes to his street outfit and then went out with the excuse of going shopping.

To begin with, he never paid to no one to had sex with him, because he was too poor, so it was impossible. However, there were some occasions in which he was paid for it, and he was the one who reached those persons in the first place, but he never went to places to offer himself as a prostitute, he found them through some shady site on the internet, and never went with whoever, only with the ones he considered “safer” and after one or two normal dates. After that he found a sugar daddy that gave him a bit of money, his TV and his laptop, but the man got tired of him quickly, hence he had to accept any job offer he found.

It could only be possible that Mo Bei’s friend had known about his deeds from a friend of a friend, but he obviously couldn’t have recognized him when he was helping Mo Bei, unless he had seen him at some point. At least he was sure he hadn’t slept with him in those fuzzy and desperate months. Or so he hoped, he never was too out of himself to not remember fully what happened in those times, there were little piece of his memory which weren’t that clear, but it was still impossible to not remember someone.

When he finally arrived at the grocery store, he tried to suppress his anxiousness about those memories. He had already forced himself to forget it when he found his current job, so he had to do it once more. At least it helped him to not think in the disappointment of not being able to frankly ask Mo Bei that favor to use his voice. He knew he wouldn’t have the guts to try it ever again, so better to forget everything about him.

Fortunately, there was still food at home, so his two shopping bags weren’t as full as last weekend. This time he indulged himself with ice cream, one for him and one for Mo Bei. He wasn’t sure of what kind of flavor he would like, so he bought some common flavors, waiting to surprise the other man.

At his place, he found the living room empty, thinking that maybe Mo Bei was in his room. So, he went to put away the groceries. Shang Qinghua knew he may had overreacted in their last conversation; it could be that Mo Bei was just joking around or even thinking about something entirely different. Although he was sure the other’s expression wasn’t far from his assumption, there wasn’t any other explanation for it, at least he couldn’t come up with any other.

That’s why he took the ice creams as a peace offering, maybe with it everything could be forgotten, and if he didn’t have the courage to ask about his voice that day, another day could be possible.

Shang Qinghua walked to his room, taking deep breaths to calm his nervous heart and entered with his hands holding the ice creams. Nonetheless, the room was empty.

With his place being that small, there wasn’t space for someone as big as him to hide, and the bag with his things was nowhere to be seen. When he walked closer to the bed, he found a piece of paper over his pillow. Leaving the ice cream in the nightstand, he took the paper to read it.

“Thanks for everything, now I’m going back to my place. I hope you learn how to take care of yourself.”

Those were the only words written. Short and rude thanks from someone that didn’t even try to say it face to face and preferred to go away without worrying if his host had anything to say or ask.

Shang Qinghua made it into a wad of paper and thrown it to the floor with anger. He was angry, of course he was, but not because his words, his way of leaving or the man himself. He was mad because now he was feeling disappointed and alone, he felt how now his apartment seemed too big and quiet, how his fridge and cupboard were filled with more food than he needed.

He hated that although he tried since the beginning to not care, now he was caring and suffering the consequences of him becoming too dependent of whoever showed him a bit of kindness. He hated what a mess he did in their last conversation. He hated the small wish about having a way to contact him, as if he was his friend. And that was what he hated the most, that a part of him was thinking he was something for him, not only the owner of the house he used to recover from his wound. They only knew each other names, Shang Qinghua knew Mo Bei’s workplace and that he came from a rich family, even if he never agreed to that; while Mo Bei only knew his name and never asked about anything else, because he never cared.

And it should be what made things easier, that Mo Bei never cared. Neither he cared, Shang Qinghua himself didn’t tried to know more about him; however he had what he considered as an excuse, the fear about annoying him or being rejected by him. It never was that he didn’t feel curious, on the contrary, he really wanted to ask but refrained of doing so. And still, here he was feeling so alone after some minutes without him.

In a fit of rage, he took the pillow and covered his face with it so he could muffle his exasperated shout. With only two seconds over his face, he threw it to the floor with force because all of it smelled like him. At first, he intended to take a deep breath and enjoy it, but his brain took away the heart’s control quickly, so he stood up and removed all the bed clothes and threw them into the washing machine.

After that, he went back to his computer to focus only on his novel and the things the other company was still explaining about the audio drama. It was hard the first hours, he really had to force his brain again and again until all he could think about was anything else but Luo Binghe and his harem.

Chapter Text

Although his job consumed most of his energy during the weekdays, Shang Qinghua managed to make his mind think in nothing more than his novel. Mostly because the producer of the audio drama allowed him to make the rough sketch of the script for the chapters and then he was one of the reviewers of the final script.

He wasn’t particularly excited when he received the offer for the audio drama, but when it began to take form and feel real, he was completely into it. Nothing to do with him looking for any possible way to keep his mind busy, of course not.

At the office, he stopped caring about the others giving him a huge amount of work, just because it was enough for his mind to not wander off. Even if doing overtime was as bothersome as the first times.

Besides, happened that his boss noticed how much of the work he was doing.

It was on the third month, after all the audio drama’s development started, when he handed over to his boss, an urgent report his coworkers gave him. He usually gave everything to one of his senior coworkers, but that day they had already left to had lunch and only his boss remained, aside from him.

They told him it was urgent, although he didn’t know which was the time limit, so he began doing it since receiving it until then; putting aside the other reports, which were for that day too. He checked a few times before handing it over, but still asked his boss to review it and tell him any change he needed to do.

“I didn’t give you this, did I?” The question coming from his boss broke his concentration for some seconds, even he doubted who had order him to do it.

“Um… no, sir, my senior gave it and said it was urgent.” Shang Qinghua answered after some seconds trying to understand if he had done something wrong.

“Are you not going to had lunch?” The second question left him more confused than the first one, which made him a bit wary, trying to see what his boss was getting at.

“No, I forgot to bring something, and I still have so much to do, if I go, I’ll leave late again…” he answered, looking how his boss only nodded and left the report over his desk; then he walked towards the exit of their office section without anything else to say. Finding it a weird exchange, he quickly tried to forget about it and got back to his five reports left to do.

After that, apart of his coworkers, his boss was giving him some reports to do. He thought the man was mad about something he did, but because he couldn’t understand or remember what it was, he kept quiet and did what was told. It wasn’t more job, anyways, only that his boss’ request were a bit lengthier than the normal ones.

It took like two or three weeks of that hard work until his boss told him that from then on, he would only do the reports he will ask him to do. “And since your workmates are so eager for you to do their job, from now on I’ll give you the assignments and you’ll give them to your team. Am I clear?” He said while looking at the rest of them who nodded with embarrassment and a tad of rage.

Shang Qinghua thought that it would lead to his coworkers to hate him and made things difficult for him. However, what he received was the same old cold shoulder, but they still did what he asked them to do, only receiving from time to time some eyes full of anger. Yet, he made the effort to divide the work in the same amount for everyone, even for him who had his own assignments from the boss.

Besides his fortune with his job and his novel, the only memorable change was when he took a new route for going and coming from his workplace. It took him like seven to ten more minutes, but it was a reasonable sacrifice to do in order to not ever see The Man again. Because he didn’t know what to say, because he was angry, because he was really trying to forget that all of that ever happened and because he wanted to exercise his legs a bit with that walk. Sure.

Like that, nine months went by. The audio drama development went swiftly, the news was spread after five months of work, so they could foresee how popular or accepted it might be. His haters were outraged, obviously, but the new and old fans were quick to defend the possible product and to encourage the production.

By that time, Shang Qinghua was used to the haters, all their hurtful, derogatory and harsh comments were ignored by him, he let his own readers to defend. In the beginning he obviously felt awful about himself and his creation, a lot of times he thought about giving it up; however he changed because the people that enjoyed, openly, his novel. They wanted more and they were paying, so it was only natural of him to keep going. After all, he learnt from his real life that no matter how much effort you make, there always be people who will hate you and everything you do.

In the end he opted to ignore the bad comments or, when it was inevitable, laugh and agree without replying. He knew all the lacks in his writing, he knew how much he hated a lot of his choices and how he could made them better, but the moment he chose to write for his readers happiness instead of his own, he accepted it wouldn’t be a masterpiece.

So now, he was pretty shocked of how many were truly waiting with anticipation for the audio drama. His own excitement grew bigger when he thought it couldn’t go beyond that.

After all those months working on it, the first chapters were almost finished. He was amazed by how good the music was, he never thought they would put so much into his story, that maybe they would do it half-heartedly because how close the numbers were between the acceptance and the hate towards the story itself. On the contrary, the developer’s company wanted it to be a challenge, to make all the haters lose their heads when the results showed an improved work when all the hidden plot was now explained in a better way.

At first all of them, Shang Qinghua included, thought that the fans would be disappointed because the story would be slightly different from the novel itself. Everybody knew how popular the audio dramas were when they followed line by line the original stories; in spite of this, they took the risk when the author demonstrated that the new version would be worth it. Besides, the most important parts wouldn’t be affected at all. The rhythm and speed may vary, but the scenes and big moments would be the same. And when they noticed in the credits that he was part of the producers, people would react less negatively. So they prayed.

On that day, Shang Qinghua had finished another chapter draft and sent to the co-producer. The previous day, they sent him the final design of the rest of the characters they would use to the covers, and in those was his beloved Mobei-Jun, who was looking as stunning as he ever dreamt. He even asked for a solo image of him, not caring if it was only a doddle or whatever, he wanted him as his screensaver, using in the meanwhile that middle quality sample.

While thinking on it, he sighed when he remembered the gorgeous voice he wouldn’t have, waiting that the one they found would be enough. His train of thoughts quickly arrived at a place he didn’t want to when he asked himself about that Mo Bei.

Mo Bei assured him, quite many times, that neither him or his friend knew nothing about the underworld or the mafia, as he thought when he met them. But even after all those days, he still feared that they would show up asking for money, that he still didn’t have, or maybe to hide after killing someone or if someone was going to kill them. Maybe they could try to blackmail him, with what his friend supposedly knew about him, for him to do some dirty jobs or whatever.

He slapped himself in the face, mentally, when he knew that the fear was overpowered by the subtle wish to see him again. As if all the mental harassment he did to himself wasn’t enough to keep those thoughts out of his head, he was once more yearning for the impossible.

Suddenly, his doorbell rang, making him almost spill his cup of noodles over his computer. Lately it had been many times in which he was about to ruin his computer with noodles! The second rang took him out of his contemplations to get up and see who was pestering him when he had such a revelation of his clumsiness and the danger it was to his files.

The moment he opened the door, he froze for who knows how much time until he looked away as if he had seen no one outside and slowly closed his door. However, a black boot stood in between the door and the frame, the owner pushed the door open and entered with a smirk. Uninvited, and as he was the owner of the place, he walked towards the sofa, leaving a shocked Shang Qinghua still holding the handle and following him with the eyes with a heavy storm of thoughts in his head.

“I see you still eat that trash,” were the first words Mo Bei said. He seated with one arm extended over the back of the couch and the other over the arm. Until then, Shang Qinghua closed the door and came closer.

“What… what are you doing here? Are you hiding from someone or something like that? Didn’t you said that you weren’t working in nothing shady? Or did you come back for your money? I keep it in my…” as always, he blurted out everything that came to his mind, and was silenced by him. As usual.

“Why is that you barely talk but when you do, it’s only spill out such foolishness?” And there it was, his characteristic scowl and annoyance. “Come here and sit, and give me your contact info.”

“Why should I?” he finally said after taking a deep and long breath.

“Give. It. Now.” And that was convincing enough, if it didn’t persuade you, it’s because you didn’t see the intensity in his eyes and voice. Shang Qinghua complied, writing his mail address and his phone number. “I want you to work for me, later I’ll send you the details about salary and what it’s needed from you.”

“Didn’t you say they would never hire me for security?” This time he wasn’t intimidated enough, he was still a bit angry about that failed conversation. Just a bit. “Besides, what makes you think that I want to leave my current job?”

“It was pretty obvious that you hated your job, and I doubt you were brave enough to leave it and find something better.” And that was something he hated the most when they had their rare talks: he talked as if he were familiar with him when he never made the effort to know him. Of course sometimes he hit the mark, because he was such a boring and simple person, but there were times when he assumed the worst. “And I’m not doing that kind of job anymore.”

“Then what? Do you started a new business and want some low paid workforce? I won’t leave my job for instability or some leftovers.”

“You’ll find out soon enough, mister Airplane Towards the Sky.” And with those last words he was left speechless until a notification came from his phone. He knew it came from the mail he was using to speak to the co-producer, so he had to look at it, even if he really wanted to know why Mo Bei used his pen name.

The mail wasn’t the answer to his last mail, it was a new one with an attached file and the sender saying: “I’ll check the other mail later, I wanted to give you the final list of voice actors that were left to confirm. Now we have the important ones, you should check one special name there.”

In complete disbelief, Shang Qinghua opened the file and looked at the name. His inner voice was telling him he was being illogical with whatever thought stuck in his mind. However it wasn’t as impossible as it felt. The name in front of his Mobei-Jun’s name was ‘Mo Bei’.

He read it like a million times until he rose his eyes, his couch was empty, and the man was standing close to the door, ready to leave and left him full of questions. “Stay right there.” He said with all the authority he could put in his voice over all the confusion. “Wh-what’s the meaning of this? How is it possible? Is this some kind of joke?”

“I supposed you wouldn’t believe me, so I told them to tell you today,” he said as if it was nothing. Which made it even harder to believe. As the anxious overthinker he was, he began to think in all Mo Bei could have done to make a joke like that, or how it could had been planned by the audio drama team? Anything was more believable than he getting what he wanted from the beginning. He even was thinking that at some point of the afternoon he died electrocuted when the noodles fell over his computer and the plug. Maybe it was better, because if he were to awake in the morning with all being a big fantasy, it would make him mad for all the eternity. “Are you still there?”

“Get. Out.” His mind was still in complete disarray, he couldn’t think straight anymore, and looking at that perfect man with his eyes over him, with something like expectation and worry, made everything more difficult for him. He couldn’t focus on anything that the phrase “This is a bad joke.” And the only way to calm himself was to be alone until his brain rebooted or something.

“Wait, relax, you really don’t look good.” He tried to walk towards him, but he received a strong push on his chest and a furious look on the face of the smaller man. Although the storm inside his head, he suddenly had a sudden revelation, almost making all the noise inside in his head to be totally silenced with that mere though.

“Do you usually spied on what I had on my computer?” What he received, at first, was silence and a dumbfounded face, that till the other knew what to say.

“No, I never did it… before that.” So he did look at his computer. “Let me explain myself.” He rose his arms as if trying to pacify him and to not be hit again. “Since days prior, you’re looking at your screen and making all kind of weird faces, and even you were more nervous or weirder, I never asked but when you began to make those strange questions about money and my job, I frankly believed you were still clinging to the idea of me being a mafia, so when you went out, I decided to peek just to confirm you didn’t want me to kill someone or something like that.”

Shang Qinghua knew he usually did funny faces to his screen and mumbled under his breath, constantly, with or without his computer. However, he never noticed Mo Bei watching him, he was never interested. And even if what he said was true… “Then why? Why did you contact them and auditioned?” It didn’t make sense, again. Why someone with a stable job and a life uninterested in any shitty web novel, would do something like that just because he read it in someone else’s computer?

“That’s a long story… but the offer made me realize I could do it and wanted to do it.” And now Mo Bei seemed a bit embarrassed, yeah, embarrassed. “Thanks to that, to you I guess, they’re willing to give me proper training for other roles and I was even recruited into a modeling agency. And that’s where I need… your help.”

“You know what? Forget it, I don´t know what’s happening anymore, surely, I’m dreaming or maybe those noodles were outdated? Am I having food poisoning again?” As if he was alone in his house, he walked to the table where his cup of noodles was abandoned before, the date was still right so those weren’t expired yet. “No? I might be exhausted then, yes, that may be the thing. Have I forgotten to sleep again?” Shang Qinghua walked to his bedroom, but when he heard steps following him, he stopped and see the man.

Mo Bei halted in his place when the other turned around looking at him with a bit of suspicious and confusion. In fact, with all he said and his expression, he looked like a mad man. “I’m not sure what’s happening, but I’ll go now, I’m going to send the info, so please thought about it.”

When he heard the door close, he walked to his bed and let himself fell face down. He and his mind refused to believe that whatever happened in those seconds, minutes or hours, was real or possible. Everything Mo Bei came to tell him made less sense than the next one, as if someone with a big imagination came to list all the most stupid tropes for fanfics or comics.

So this unknown man was left in his place when he was wounded, he lived with him for two weeks without showing any kind of interest to get to know his host, only making rude remarks and annoying demands. And then, said man, saw a mail from the host’s computer about accepting an amateur to try and demonstrate if he could give his voice to a character, he didn’t know where the character was from or who he was, and suddenly decided he wanted to try something so out-of-character for himself and auditioned for said role. In which world something like that was possible?

Then, that man was selected for the role and left such and impression on the voice-acting studio or whatever, that they even asked him to train, study or something and take bigger roles. Out of the blue, just because his voice is so deep, hot and what else? Wasn’t he emotionally constipated? Can he do more that sound angry, annoyed, spoiled or bored? Could he?

Next to that, from who knows where, he was recruited by a modelling company. Sure, his looks were a 30 out of 10; sure the underwear would be barely noticed if he were wearing it, or, surely, those clothes and jewelry could be so ugly and mismatched but with his face no one would dare to said it looked bad. Because it wouldn’t! But was that enough to become a model? Didn’t people had to knock from door to door, suffer humiliations, harassment and many other ugly things to get a little photo shoot for a camera that no one else would buy because it’s too crappy? How was that he was looking for an assistant when he just began?

To think that all of that could be possible, maybe this Mo Bei was really lucky in his life, that maybe he really was from a rich family and they were moving strings for him to get what he wanted. Even when he questioned if he was or not a rich boy, Mo Bei seemed beyond annoyed and never answered, as if it weren’t true. Whichever the reason he got the role, the spotlight and the chances for a whole new career. Fine, he was one in a million.

There was this last thing that was even more impossible, something that not in a million years could happen. That man with all the luck in the world, with looks so perfect that anyone would throw themselves to his feet to be stepped over if needed, a man born under a star full of success and, apparently, with a charisma or a convincing stand that made people do hastily decisions just to not lose him; why would he go back to a shabby department where lived a pathetic, lonely and broke weirdo and ask him to help him with a job? That was insane!

All must be a part of a vivid dream, so the next time he had to wake up, all be back to normal and boring. Yeah, he just needed to sleep and let all the insanity wash away and keep living his pathetic life with no one bothering him.

Or so he wanted to do, but on his bed, he only turned and trashed around with his brain going at high speed from thought to thought, with noise, anxiousness and fear that all was real, or that it wasn’t. At that point he wasn’t sure anymore.

Chapter Text

He woke up when the day was already bright. When he picked up his phone to see the time, he only noticed he had two Wechat messages, which was new because the only time he received something was when his landlord answered with an OK every time Shang Qinghua notified him about the monthly payment. The number was unknown, but it was enough reading the message to know from who it was from.

“Read everything before answering so you don’t complain later,” that one arrived around eleven P.M., but the second one had like ten minutes since was sent. “Hey! How come you’re still sleeping? Hurry up and read what I sent to you.”

Mo Bei was as bossy as in person, however he used more expressive words through messages, which was something funny. And probably he would have laugh if he weren’t feeling that all that was told yesterday was a dream.

He closed the app without replying, until he received another message: “You’re no allowed to leave me in Read.” It didn’t pass more than five minutes since he read the messages when Mo Bei sent that, so he sent back: “What? Are you looking at your phone waiting for my answer?”

Of course it was illogical to think he would do that. Maybe he was just texting with someone or something and ended up opening the wrong chat. However, the response coming from the other left him as speechless as the day before. “Yes, so hurry up and tell me if you will do it or not. Read. Now.”

Can the world give him a break, please? Although he considered himself a writer, he was feeling out of options of impossible synonyms. Destiny, or whatever, was like trying to give him everything he never dreamt of, to later took it away from him, and that was which made him more scared to accept everything as real. Nevertheless, if he wasn’t daydreaming, having some hallucination due to lack of sleep or food poisoning, then he can only let himself be taken to wherever the odds were taking him. Maybe later he would have to deal with reality.

“I’ll read it, I’ll read it,” he sent back before finally opening what he received yesterday.

The proposal was too formal, but straightforward. The payment was a few yuan more than his current job, although they assured it could rise with Mo Bei’s fame; there didn’t exist a job schedule per se, the work time and days were decided upon Mo Bei’s offers and jobs taken, being sometimes too early or too late. His duties as an assistant were to be where Mo Bei was to help in anything he needed, and to do some paperwork like hotel and travel registrations and the sort. Mo Bei still had a manager, so a big part of the job was going to be taken care of by them.

It didn’t seem like a too-hard job, maybe just for the random schedule, but then again, he didn’t have no one to wait him at home and he could keep doing his writing on his phone, which he didn’t like it because he always ended with wrist and thump pain, but it might be needed if they don’t get any day off.

However, it wasn’t like he was all excited about the job or like it was truly better than his current one. Yes, he wanted to leave the office job, and this was a great opportunity, but why did he had an accountancy degree if he was going to work as an assistant in something completely unrelated? Nor that people would criticize him, no one would care. Even if in the end he would be Mo Bei’s accountant, which was the other part of his job, was it worth it?

Maybe because Mo Bei was still new in the media, they wouldn’t have too much to do at first, but if his luck were still as insanely good? Wouldn’t that lead him to be popular in no time? He was used to work under pressure and most of it wouldn’t require mental work, only physical, which wasn’t the best of the two for him. He knew he was best suited for desk work than field work, but right now he couldn’t be too picky, not when he was almost over with his bank loans, which would end faster if he were to take the job.

Yet, he decided to ask Mo Bei until Tuesday or Wednesday to get his true answer. Even if nothing would change from his current job in just one day, he needed to be reminded why he wanted to leave it.

His coworkers weren’t making things difficult for him, but neither easy. Every time he had to hand over their share of work, they used such an annoyed expression that half of the time made him want to tell them he would do it, but he couldn’t because the boss was always watching who did more or less reports. He was at peace with his boss, but it wasn’t like they were close, barely acquaintances.

Probably because he wasn’t attached to anyone or anything in that job was what made so hard to woke up every morning and get ready to work. He couldn’t guess if the new job would made mornings easier, which doubted when he thought about waking up at any time before seven, but at least he would enjoy the view of the perfect build of Mo Bei’s body and face. What?

Either way, on Tuesday he gave his resignation letter to his boss when all his coworkers had already left to have lunch. The man read it slowly and then stared at him for some long seconds until he finally spoke: “Are you truly leaving because you got a better offer?”

“… Well, yes… though I’m still not so sure if will be harder or easier,” he ended up telling him after the surprise of the question made by his boss.

“That’s good, at least you’re not like those weeping young’uns who can’t endure a month of hard work and resign from every job because they can’t bear it and complain about everything.” The man signed the letter before giving it back and while giving the traditional speech that the previous generation loved to give. Shang Qinghua, actually, was from that generation of “weeping young’uns”, but they too give their speeches about how the old ones preferred to be stepped on and live with injustice instead of fighting for better job environments.

However he hated conflicts, so he just kind of smiled before taking back his letter and went to the fifth floor to leave his letter in human resources. Friday was his last day there, so he needed to finish all his work. If he had a higher position, leave would take him more time because the training of whoever would take his place, but he didn’t, so it was easier to leave.

On Friday he vowed to his former boss and thanked him when the departure time came, not caring if there were still some of his coworkers. And while he was leaving his former workplace, he received a message from Mo Bei telling him where to go tomorrow to sign the contract and meet with his manager. So no day off, apparently.

The building at where he arrived that Saturday was taller and more modern that the one of his last job, but still was a bit far from the more sophisticated and excessive ones at the capital.

Mo Bei was waiting for him at the entrance of the building, he was wearing a black leather jacket, a dark blue shirt which barely hid his toned body and perfect fitted jeans. Shang Qinghua had to make a huge effort to stop staring and get close to him because it was time for his interview with the manager. And because it was an interview, he opted to use his suit, actually one of the less used.

“You didn’t need to dress so formal,” said Mo Bei after scowling the moment he saw him.

“You could have said so, now I feel like an idiot.” And that was true, no one inside the building looked as boring as him. “So to work can I bring my sleeping shorts or something casual?”

“Why would you bring those shorts? You don’t feel shame?” The face Mo Bei did was kind of funny, so he pointed to some girls that were walking out on the fourth floor where the elevator opened to let the only person, beside them, got off. Those girls had long and slender legs, which look gorgeous in those shorts, almost as short as the one he owned.

“I wore them better,” Shang Qinghua said when the doors closed.

“Yeah, sure,” was the only response from the other until they arrived at the seventh floor.

His manager was a woman around her 40’s, who still had a lot of her beauty even if the time was already leaving its marks. She smiled at them, looking kind and excited to know Shang Qinghua. She led them to her office where they introduced themselves and she began to disclose what was needed from Shang Qinghua in that kind of work and the advantages he would have.

After like, half an hour, she asked Mo Bei to leave, with the excuse that someone was looking for him, so she could talk to him more privately.

“You know? I’m pretty amazed that Mo Bei asked for you to be his assistant, he always accepted and not cared much about what we offered, if it benefited him, but when we told him he would need an assistant and that we would search for them, he instantly said that it wasn’t needed, that he had a candidate but needed to talk it before.”

What the manager said left him, again, dumbstruck. Was he his first choice when they told him that? Maybe was another person but they didn’t accept so he came to him, right? Mo Bei already had told him that he didn’t know how to take care of others or himself, so it couldn’t be him.

“What? You think you weren’t his only choice?” She was quite observant, or maybe he had all the disbelief written over his face. “We told him to wait until he had some more offers and the higher ups accepted our petition for his assistant, he asked us to tell him right away when it was accepted, and that happened on Saturday, the last Saturday. When did he contacted you?”

“On Saturday’s night…” He hesitated before answering. Why world? Why lately you give him all the unthinkable?

“See? You’re his first choice.” The manager laughed boisterously, seeing something none of them was aware of. “Tell me something, how long you’ve known each other and where do you meet?”

“We met the first time like nine months ago, it was something casual, merely by chance.” Shang Qinghua decided to not say they weren’t close, nor friends, only if would make it harder for them to hire him. He even avoided the “where” because it would be stupid to say outside a bar or in the street when he was stabbed.

“That’s not much but at least believe me when I tell you that he said, and I quote: he’ll be my assistant, no one else’s errand boy; you better understand that he wants you for a reason.” The manager winked at him before asking him to follow her for his mandatory new workplace’s tour.

The first places he barely heard what they were for because his head was still on the last comment. Shang Qinghua wanted to believe that Mo Bei said that because he was useless, so he didn’t want him to embarrass himself in front of the others. Maybe, a tiny part of him thought about it being to protect him. Maybe?

He went back to what the manager was showing him when they arrived at the cafeteria, and after some offices and studios, they came to the one in which Mo Bei was. He was talking with a cameraman, who was pointing at the two male models who were in session with another cameraman, it was obvious that he was telling Mo Bei about poses, the light and how to learn from those men. To Shang Qinghua’s surprise, Mo Bei was all serious paying attention to every detail.

“He’s really a hard-worker and quick to learn, whatever we told him to improve today, the next day he would do it a lot better, same goes to his voice-acting skills, that’s why we couldn’t just let him go,” the manager spoke close to him while the other man was still unaware of their arrival. Watching at how focused he seemed while looking at the other, Shang Qinghua was sure that all Mo Bei’s luck went along with true effort.

Even if he was a spoiled guy born with a silver spoon, he was taking seriously his jobs and not out of a whim. Whatever his reasons were, he seemed determined to keep doing it and giving his all, either if he was proud of it or not.

When Mo Bei noticed them, the manager walked with him to get close, so she could introduce the newcomer to the cameramen and the other models. After that, she took both back, to sign the contract and to say the last things before letting them go. Not before warning them that they had a photoshoot at a public park on Monday, where they should arrive at six thirty in the morning.

“And? What do you think of the job?” asked Mo Bei while they were on the elevator.

“So far, it’s not that bad until I think about having to wake so early…” he laughed nervously. “Truth to be told, I’m not sure yet, if I like it or not, I’ll have to suffer a few weeks before knowing. At least I hope I’ll have time to keep writing.” He wasn’t sure if Mo Bei read his stupid novel or just his character’s parts, but he felt a bit relieved that he finally had someone who knew the reason why he spent so many hours in front of his computer.

“You still write? Doesn’t that thing has like 300 chapters?” Mo Bei was utterly amazed, and without the “that thing”, Shang Qinghua noticed it was a genuine wonder.

“Yeah, it gives me a bit more of money and my readers hasn’t gotten tired, yet.” Shang Qinghua shrugged; they both were now at the entrance of the building. “And I do the rough designs of the audio’s chapters, so I’m quite a busy man, you know?”

“If only it was something more decent than porn, you could tell that to anyone.” And with that, now Shang Qinghua was sure that Mo Bei had, at least, looked into his novel more than needed.

“It’s as decent as writing an adventure’s story or any other, thanks. People is who consumes it, why or why mine, that’s their problem, I just want money.” The interview was less than two hours long, so he still had plenty of time to make the most of the day. “And I need to get ahead on work to prevent if my writing time will be reduced, so I’ll see you on Monday.”

Chapter Text

From the first day, Shang Qinghua learnt a lot from watching other assistants and from knowing Mo Bei, or kind of knowing. He knew the kind of tea or drink he liked when the day was too hot or rainy, he always carried some snacks which were easy to grab, didn’t stain his fingers, dirtied his mouth or ruined his makeup. He learnt which was his favorite seat on bus or on a plane. Also that Mo Bei was one of those people who awoke in a bad mood, fortunately, he never hit him, but was about to hit another coworker, so from then on, Shang Qinghua was the only one assigned to wake him up, something he wasn’t proud or happy with. At least, Mo Bei barely took naps in their way to the photo shoot’s locations.

Till the first month, the job wasn’t excited for Shang Qinghua, although it wasn’t as bad as his previous one. He had a good relationship with Mo Bei’s manager, maybe they weren’t friends, but she worried about how he was doing in his job, if he needed something or if something was bothering him; almost the same attention she paid to her model.

On those thirty and so days, they decided to do a social gathering at some bar after work. Shang Qinghua did all he could to run away and go home, but the manager wanted him there so they could celebrate his arrival and that he stayed, and many other things; plus, Mo Bei was going too.

He didn’t enjoy drinking, the alcohol’s taste was one of the things he hated the most, and he told them, so they convinced him that he could drink sodas while they were with the baijiu. With that promise, he accepted.

Nonetheless, the reality was different. Of course that when they arrived, they respected his no drinking choice, that was until they were more drunk. At the beginning he was seated with the manager, two spots far from Mo Bei, but when she went to the restroom, his left and right were occupied by two female models, the manager worked with them, so were like Mo Bei’s older sisters.

Usually, at the office, they liked talking with Mo Bei about tips and healthy food; because were chats not so interesting to Shang Qinghua, he would be on his phone, never getting in their conversation. However, when they were bored and Mo Bei was working, they always came to tease him, in an innocent way; it was about how if he took better care of himself and his looks, he could be as handsome as Mo Bei, which obviously was a big lie, and he didn’t care not being not even close to their beauty or Mo Bei’s handsomeness.

So that day at the bar, they didn’t let a moment to tease him go to waste, they wanted him to drink one cup. He tried to resist as much as he could, but they didn’t relent, they served him a cup, and insisted until he gave it the first sip. Shang Qinghua couldn’t suppress his grimace when the taste filled his mouth. It was too sour, even with a drink with a low percentage of alcohol as that, it was too much for him. He thought that would be enough for them, but instead of tease him with any other thing, they were asking him to keep trying the drink. It was until the manager came back that took his cup off him and told them to stop bother him if he didn’t want to drink.

Using the opportunity, Shang Qinghua went to hide in the restroom for some minutes. Not only alcohol wasn’t appealing to him, but drunk people also made him anxious. He wasn’t a girl, so he shouldn’t have that kind of fear, even so, he didn’t like it and made him feel uncomfortable, even bringing back some bad memories.

After like ten minutes hiding, he had to came out because he didn’t want to be too obvious. This time he occupied a place near the cameramen and others, he just sat in a corner, eating some of the snacks without mixing in whatever they were talking. However, his choice was even worse than being with the girls because drunk men were more annoying than women.

He didn’t last more than five minutes when he took out his phone and pretended to receive a call, to went out the bar. He squatted down some feet far from the entrance and sighed loudly, hiding his face behind his knees.

“You’re more antisocial of than I thought.” When he faced the man who talked to him, Mo Bei had his arms crossed over his chest and was watching at the bar in front of them.

“Wasn’t it obvious already?” Shang Qinghua put down his face again, he couldn’t fool Mo Bei with the phone thing because only him knew, or thought he knew, that the only people who could call him were in that bar with him. “Can I just go home? I paid my social hours already.”

“We have been here only one and a half hours, they’re barely starting, and it would be rude.” Mo Bei said what Shang Qinghua feared he would say. He knew it was too early, he already watched his phone to confirm it. Somehow, he wished Mo Bei would tell him that it was okay if he disappeared in that moment.

They stood there in silence for some long minutes until Mo Bei asked him to go back, that maybe in one hour he could finally be free. Not being so sure about it, Shang Qinghua complied and went inside.

To say that the time went faster after that, was entirely the opposite of what really happened, and what he wanted to happen. As always, he was so bulliable, even if none of them was being mean, all of them were teasing him for whatever reason they found. Of course, he was used to that and to ignore it, that was until the models were back into how jealous were of his body that had so little fat. They were thinking that his body was like those that no matter how much they ate, they wouldn’t gain weight, however the truth was that he had bad eating habits.

What started with them comparing the size of the models’ waists with his, went as far as they trying to pull up is sweatshirt and shirt to size even without the clothes and know how tiny it really was. He was trying to not make a fuss, just holding down his clothes with all his might, but the drunks’ strength was beyond his own, so it was long until he was almost laying on the floor with them all over him.

“Enough.”

A hand came down and pulled, from the neckband of his shirt, Shang Qinghua up and out of their hands easily. While the woman made a pout full of disappointment, the men just laughed it off.

As soon as he was standing, he ran to hide again in the bathroom, now hating drunk people even more than before. This time he was considering hiding in there until twelve and hope that they were gone after that, because going through that kind of humiliating display was a big NOPE for him. He hated being so defenseless and useless, it was even worse because Mo Bei had to intervene for him.

People were getting in and out of the bathroom, he should be hiding inside of one of the restrooms, however he wasn’t too eager to that option, although any of his coworkers could walk in and see him doing nothing but stand near the hand drier. Maybe his plan wasn’t doable at all. Full of frustration, he turned around to face the wall and hit his forehead on it.

“Hey, stop that, let’s go.” A hand was placed over his shoulder, it took him some seconds to notice it was Mo Bei who was talking to him, again. Shang Qinghua shook his hand off and shook his face.

“I won’t go back, I wanna go home, I’m so tired of drunk people, I hate so much these gatherings because of that and…” he stopped complaining when he remembered to who he was talking to, and that he didn’t know if he came alone or not.

“We’re going.” Mo Bei took him from his wrist and dragged him out, he knew it was useless to try to resist, so he let himself be controlled, barely noticing anything until the cold breeze of the street hit his face. Mo Bei had taken him out of the bar.

“Wait, they’ll be offended if I just disappear like that.” Shang Qinghua tried to walk back, but the other man hadn’t released his wrist, he was stopped.

“Didn’t you hear? I told them we were going back because we had to work tomorrow, which obviously is a lie, before you start to freak out that you didn’t know.”

“Oh… no, I didn’t hear it… but didn’t the boss should know it’s a lie?” He turned to see the man, who made him began to walk.

“She knows it’s a lie, she let us go, thank her later or tomorrow.” Mo Bei finally released him. “Stop being a pain in the ass and go home.”

“Right.” Shang Qinghua sighed, he couldn’t lie and tell those words didn’t hurt, even if it was the truth and he was, as always, bothering him. “Sorry for that and for making you go, I’ll go now.”

On the bright side, they would never invite him again to one of those gatherings, knowing how boring and embarrassing he was, which was totally fine with him, more than fine, it was perfect. And, probably, they would even stop talking to him at the office; not that they always spoke to him, but maybe they could begin to ignore him. Which it wasn’t that fine, but at least would give him space to keep doing his writing on his phone in every free time he had. He wasn’t looking for friendship, so it was okay, he was used to it.

On the other side, it could affect Mo Bei’s reputation, or something like that, with the manager for having such a wimpy and weenie assistant. She couldn’t blame her or Mo Bei, he and socialization were sworn enemies, peace between them was not an option, never.

Because of that, he spent the weekend biting his nails, figuratively, and full of anxiousness that Mo Bei or his manager would call to fire him. Even if, when he was walking back home that night, he sent his most sincere and full apology, almost full, to the manager; he expressed his regrets about his behavior, for ruining the mood, for making Mo Bei left and almost for being alive, but he didn’t want to be that pitiful, yet.

Although her answer was one “Don’t sweat it, wasn’t your fault,” he was sure that bad things were bound to happen on Monday. When he saw Mo Bei waiting for him on the entrance, he began to shake in fear, preparing to be yelled, if not there, at the elevator or at the manager’s office.

“What? Are you sick again?” Mo Bei had his arms crossed over his chest, looking at him, he was annoyed, or mad, it was obvious. “If you’re sick, go back, now.”

“N-no! I’m fine, seriously, I swear.”

When Mo Bei took a step towards him and raised his hand, Shang Qinghua’s instinct was to shrink and close his eyes as if he were about to be hit. However, he opened them when he felt a hand over his forehead, to see the taller man too close without looking directly at him, until he moved away his hand. Was he looking angrier? “You better don’t lie to me.”

“I wouldn’t dare,” he blurted out, before realizing he just lied to him.

They walked in silence to the elevator, Mo Bei’s expression wasn’t softening, more like becoming worse.

“If we run into them and they apologize, just don’t say “it’s ok” or some crap like that, just accept it.” Shang Qinghua couldn’t understand why would they apologize if he were the one making a scene on a normal social gathering, wasn’t he the one that needed to apologize? “Do you hear me?”

“Yes!” he almost shouted when he found Mo Bei’s freezing eyes over him. Could he get even more mad? Probably he was about to find out.

“And don’t you dare to apologize, or I’ll kill you.”

With that simple threat, he left the elevator to go to the studio they were going to use that day. Now Shang Qinghua was a bit more confused than scared, why was he unable to apologize? It was because it was meaningless? Because his words were useless?

He jumped out of the elevator when the doors started to close and followed him. His only possibility to avoid any mistakes, was to keep quiet until he understood what Mo Bei, or the others, wanted from him. He hated that day more than anything, thinking about why he didn’t die in his sleep.

The floor to which they arrived was completely arranged to be seven different studios. Most of them had pure white walls, others had the green screen, an excellent lightning and a storage where they kept almost everything that could be useful for the shoots like chairs, tables and many decorative things that could be used to sit or to lean on.

When they were about to enter the studio Mo Bei had to use, they met with those Shang Qinghua didn’t want to meet. The two models and two cameramen, who were “teasing” him that night, were in the studio next to theirs, so they came the moment they noticed them.

“Hey… umm…” one of the models began after their usual hi. “Sorry for what happened on Friday, I can’t remember all of it, we…”

“We mostly remember being with you and the others, and then Mo Bei was looking at us as if he wanted us dead,” the cameraman helped her. “And the manager didn’t tell us what we did but yelled at us and ordered us to apologize to both of you…”

“She said to especially apologize to you, xiǎo Shang,” then the four pair of eyes were over him.

“Ah… that… it’s…” when he was about to say “okay”, a heavy hand was placed over his head and squeezed him with some strength. Mo Bei told him something before going up, didn’t he? But what else he could say? He wasn’t familiar with being the apology receptor. “Um… apology accepted?”

“Oh thank god!” both the models said almost at the same time, which amazed Shang Qinghua, the four of them truly seemed relieved because his answer.

“Seriously, the manager is frightening when she’s angry, but you should have seen Mo Bei, he was killing us with only his eyes, yes, right like that!”

Shang Qinghua tried to turn around and see what they were seeing, however the hand was still over his head, so it was held harder to prevent him from turning and led to enter the studio. “Come, time to work” Mo Bei said, even if he hadn’t to do nothing because he was only an assistant.

After that weird incident, the manager came to them. While Mo Bei was changing his clothes, into what was needed for the takes, the manager interrogated Shang Qinghua about the apology and if he was fine with only that or wanted for her to punish them, which left him even more confused. He was wondering why it seemed that the embarrassment wasn’t he.

Mo Bei’s photo shoot that day was to promote some watches, rings and bracelets, but because it had to be formal, he had to use a suit. While they were giving him the final touches, Shang Qinghua came near to the expensive looking accessories that were going to be modelled. Out of curiosity, he took one of the watches and felt it was really heavy and so manly looking, all the body on black, with some decorations in deep blue and the little details on silver.

“Try it.” The sudden voice of the manager made him jump in surprise and almost making it fall. “Come on, I have an idea, but try this other one.”

The one she selected was smaller and smoother, after putting it on him, she saw his wrist for many angles, pulling him to one place to another to see the lightning on it. Then she called the cameraman and the one representing the manufacturer’s company, Shang Qinghua clearly hear the idea for him to be part of the shoots, but only his hands along with Mo Bei’s as if comparing two different hand body types.

He thought someone would point out how bad the idea was; however, everyone was excited. They sent the cameraman to ask for a blouse and a suit jacket from the clothes storeroom that fitted him while the makeup artist prepared his hands, with a full and quick manicure.

“Why am I using woman clothes?” asked Shang Qinghua when they were making him try the clothes he found.

“Because our male models are a lot bigger than you, we don’t have your size, and no one will see but us, what’s the problem?” The manager’s tone was enough for him to not complain anymore, which he wanted desperately to do because Mo Bei snorted when they saw how it was the right size.

At the beginning, the photos were simple, with nothing out of the ordinary, just two different hands posing together. But when it was time for the star to shine, they made Shang Qinghua put his adorned hand on Mo Bei’s shoulder, chest, cheek! or even half covering his eyes. Which wasn’t far from normal because they were using matching jewelry. If he weren’t him, he would think that the manager and the rest were matching them both, which, obviously was beyond the bounds of possibility.

Even so, the saleswoman was more than satisfied with the takes and excited to see the final result. While the manager and she talked, and the cameraman gathered his things up, he and Mo Bei were in the changing room.

“The manager and her crazy ideas, right?” Shang Qinghua laughed nervously; he wasn’t sure if Mo Bei was mad because he was included, it wasn’t his fault but who knows what the other was thinking, so he decided to test the waters.

“I guess. Whatever sells.”

And, in fact, even though the modelled brand wasn’t popular amongst their country, the advertising became quite popular throughout Weibo for some weeks, probably because it was almost too obvious the anonymous hands were from another man and the disposition a bit too suggestive; until it faded slowly.

Chapter Text

New jobs were becoming more constant, even if Mo Bei still didn’t have a huge fanbase or fame, more popular brands were looking for him, though were more renowned in their area, more than in the entire country, which was enough. Shag Qinghua’s paycheck was becoming more and more generous, although it was not enough for him to buy a house, nor that he wanted either.

Though he already had paid his debts, he didn’t increase his expenses because he saved as much as he could to reward himself with a tablet, which was a lot more comfortable to arrange and maintain Mo Bei’s schedule, answer mails, monitor his social media profiles and gossips, and to work on his reports. But, more importantly, to write the chapter drafts for the audio drama, now that they were starting with the planning for a second season, even if they still had to see how well the first one would be received; and to keep going with the last chapters of his novel, more like some short extras with information that would be more important in the audio drama.

And after his tablet, his next acquisitions planned were a new computer, a new TV and a new bed. He was too used to a cheap life; he could keep it without problems if that meant to have better things that he truly needed in his life.

Moreover, healthier or fresher food wasn’t part of his interest, not when most of the time the ate outside because the locations of the shoots or how late they ended. Besides, he was barely hungry when he ate from Mo Bei’s snacks, only when he decided he didn’t want anymore, which, too, was making him put on some weight. That alone, and how sloppy his wardrobe was, he considered to save some more for new clothes, but, then again, those weren’t first necessities like what he had already planned.

Fortunately, no one, never, told him anything about him always wearing oversized sweatshirts, cardigans, shirts and jeans. Which were more than useful now that he was losing his thin figure, even if his belly wasn’t protruding, yet. He hoped it wouldn’t happen, a bit of fat was enough for him to stop being considered so abnormal.

But things shouldn’t be thought, not once, because his bad luck would activate as if it smelled fear and made things hard for him.

They were in a photo shoot inside a clothing store, it was a brand quite popular in the neighboring cities and theirs. Mo Bei had to use the store clothes and pose here and there, inside and outside the local, taking advantage that it was a weekday, so there weren’t many people strolling around. However, after three hours they hadn’t finished yet.

At first, he was concentrated tapping in his tablet, until his fingers became sore and tired, along with his neck. He was thinking whether going out to distract himself with the rest of the stores in the shopping plaza, or to go back to writing.

“Hey, I have an idea.” Suddenly the manager’s voice came close to him, as if she had become as bored as him. “Come, try some clothes, just for fun.”

She grabbed him from his wrist and made him stand up and walk to the fitting rooms. “Why? We will make a mess for the girls working here, let’s not disturb them.”

“No, no, it’ll be okay, trust me, and you won’t be using as much as Mo Bei.” With a quick glance through the clothes, she pulled out a set that looked as if it was already put together. “Here, try with this one first.”

He knew the manager, she was as stubborn as Mo Bei but with the hierarchy too high for anyone to disobey or, even, to refuse. Because of it, he shut it and went inside the fitting room, leaving aside all the pity and embarrassment he felt towards the girls who will have to re-arrange the clothes.

That first set of clothes consisted in three pieces: a black t-shirt, not as oversized as the ones he used but neither too tight-fitting, which had to use inside the baggy olive green pants which were hold over his waist by a brown belt, as per the manager’s instruction; and a checkered shirt that seemed cut at less than an inch above his pants and waist, which had to use closed only at the last button, again as per her instructions.

“That’s a nerd style, it truly fits you, huh?” said the manager when he came out and was made to turn around so she could watch him completely. Was he a notorious nerd? He didn’t use glasses or used that kind of nerdy clothes, so why did she know? “Now try this one.”

That second was again a three pieces set: it was a white t-shirt, a little bit more tight than the previous one; a black and tight jeans that weren’t as tight as some skinny type, and a black jacket long enough to almost reach his knees, almost because he wasn’t as short as he believed, with three quarter sleeves, this one should be wear open, she said.

“This one I call it: maturity” the manager was like holding her laugher. “You look so different, but it’s not bad, actually, right?” She asked to the girl from the store, who seemed to be enjoying as much as the manager as if he was some kind of doll. With that he wasn’t feeling guilty for his boss’ bright idea. “Now this one.” The smile on the manager’s face was more than suspicious, so Shang Qinghua waited until he was inside the fitting room to see her new choice.

“No way I’m using this,” he almost screamed from inside.

The new set was like a mix between the prior ones: black skinny jeans, skinny as if they were a new skin on top his real skin because it was almost impossible to him fit in; the shirt this time was black but transparent! Even if it was so dark, it was possible to see his navel and nipples! The only thing that made him accept to come out was that over all he had a royal blue jacket with some black decorations, which should be open, but he would never use it like that.

He had his eyes on the floor, too ashamed to face them and too scared of the manager if he were to refuse her order. He walked with his hands over his abdomen, trying to cover that see-through part, but when he turned around, he opened his arms for a bit until he raised his eyes and noticed that beside the manager was Mo Bei.

“What the… Don’t look!” Shang Qinghua crunched down and hugged his belly, feeling his face becoming too hot.

“Aw come on, that outfit it’s perfect!” The manager came closer to him to make him stand up, however, this time he wasn’t manipulated. “Look, Mo Bei has turned around, let me see again, it looks good, I swear.”

“Forget it!” He let himself be raised so he could run to hide in the fitting room. Because he saw himself on the mirror, he knew the outfit didn’t look bad on him, but he would never accept that it looked good either. It was too showy, not his style at all, nor something he dreamt to use, ever.

“Fine, whatever, but now try this one, Mo Bei chose it for you.” The manager passed the clothes from above the door. Shang Qinghua considered not taking them, yet his curiosity to know what Mo Bei could have picked was bigger than the last embarrassment.

He guessed that, being Mo Bei and how little knew about him, his choice couldn’t be far from what he normally wear. That’s why he was so taken aback when he noticed the set was made of a shirt with long sleeves and horizontal thin white and red lines, black tight jeans and a denim jacket that made his body look larger.

Since the first time he met Mo Bei, he never thought Mo Bei would have a decent sense of fashion style. However, when he was staying at his place, he never had to use clothes to leave the house, so he couldn’t be sure if he learnt while working as a model or he knew things already.

Either way, he changed to it and came out. Both the manager and the store clerk were too amazed to make any comment, while Mo Bei only raised one brow. He was feeling confident before stepping out, now he felt too self-conscious and almost ran to hide until the manager came to him and walked around him.

“Mo Bei won, and he only made you try one set!” she complained when she went back to her seat and Mo Bei, after a quick snort, went back to where the photos were being taken. Shang Qinghua didn’t know what that meant! Mo Bei was thinking that they overpraised him, and he didn’t look that good? Or that it was obvious that he would win because he was a model? “Well, it was the expected outcome. Go change back and give back the clothes.”

He did as she said, still trying to understand what had just happened. However, things got weirder when she took the clothes from his hands and gave them to the clerk, asking her to charge everything.

“What? Why are you buying that?” Shang Qinghua ran to catch up with her when they were already in the register.

“Because we had discounts thanks to our model” she didn’t look at him, only watching the girl folding the clothes to put them on the paper bags they used for the purchases. “Besides, you’re his assistant, you should dress better.”

When she paid, he knew any complain would be useless. Now he had to bear the shame to be dressed by his bosses, because his idea to repay them was not accepted. On top of that, the next day the manager arranged a meeting with one of the stylists of the company, to where he should go with photos of his wardrobe and be prepared to be instructed by him.

Shang Qinghua couldn’t understand the obsession about his appearance after almost six months working as Mo Bei’s assistant. He wasn’t tall enough to be a model, he had a common face, far from the handsomeness of the true models, and he wasn’t even popular among Mo Bei’s fans when he appeared in any of the photos taken by them, he was as invisible as always.

The stylist made him a lot of questions and, when he saw how lacking his fashion sense was, he decided to take it as a challenge. Of course, Shang Qinghua warned him how unwilling he was to make big changes in his clothes collection, because monetary reasons.

He even received a new haircut after that first visit, and while his hair was drying, he heard the stylist talking to the manager and, probably, Mo Bei.

“He’s so lost, like a child!” Even with a door separating them, Shang Qinghua was able to listen to his rambling. And he was saying nothing more than the truth, he was never interested in fashion or in looking good, he knew that part of his invisibility was thanks to his plain look, and he didn’t want to make it different. “I bet he can’t take care of him or a pet, even a fish might die in his hands.”

“Oh no, he surely knows how to take care of others, he does a splendid work as Mo Bei’s assistant.” The manager defending him, made him feel a bit happy. “He just doesn’t want to be spotted, apparently.”

“Whatever his reasons, I wonder how he has reached this age, although he’s pretty young, his parents surely spoiled him too much.” And that was new.

In all his life, he never heard no one to address his self-loathing as being a spoiled brat. Not that he had ever met people who were interested in knowing him better to analyze him. The questions the stylist made were about his lifestyle, like his skincare routine, how often he went shopping for clothes or what was his diet, things like that and nothing too nosy as who he lived with and so on.

Fortunately, Mo Bei saved his face and stopped them from making assumptions, when he asked if he was ready, with the excuse that they had things to do. The stylist gave the final touches to his new haircut, that was more like a bit of bangs fixing because he refused to let the man cut the rest of his hair.

It was long enough to be below his shoulders, he had always considered to make it shorter or longer, but he was too comfortable with the way it was. He loved to have it on a high bun or a low ponytail at home, using a half or high ponytail when going out to work. It was short enough to not get tangled too often, and long enough for him to “change” hairstyles, even if those were only four, or maybe five if having it loose counted.

The people at work loved the new hairstyle, even if it was not so different from the prior one. He couldn’t pinpoint the changes correctly, but he loved the new form it took, so he easily forgave the man for calling him a spoiled brat.

Time flew faster. Soon months became one and a half years working as an assistant of a model who was as popular as to appear in some web magazines, made 8 to 10K likes on his Weibo posts and having been invited to some entertainment events because his popularity as model and as a voice actor. Heck, he even had some lingering offers for him to become a singer, which he kept refusing because he wasn’t confident in his singing, although when he had to do it for some voice acting works, he was as perfect as ever. And, certainly, he was offered opportunities as an actor, which were refused too, because one thing was to act behind a mic on a small cabin and something completely different was to do it in front of many others and to be recorded.

The manager never got tired to show all the offers to Mo Bei, she believed that, at some point, he would accept only to be left in peace. She should know how stubborn he was, though she was the same, so it was more like a battle of patience and perseverance. Shang Qinghua was fine with whoever win that, since one winning meant more money and the other less work.

However, all that calmness was disturbed by one visit.

Chapter Text

One morning, when they were arriving to the company’s building, they were stopped by a man that called Mo Bei’s name. His bodyguards stepped between his client and the unknown man, while Shang Qinghua even took a defensive stance. No one has ever hurt Mo Bei, not even by accident from his fans when the way into the airport was crowded by them. Still, prevention was the best course of action.

“It’s me, Zhang Ning. Do you remember me? I was your father’s friend.” The man wore a dark grey suit with a black tie, he was almost as tall as Mo Bei and with a prime, proud and smart demeanor, he was only looking at Mo Bei, not moving from where he was standing and waiting for the model to answer him.

“Come inside.” Was all Mo Bei said, giving his consent to his guards lo let him in. Shang Qinghua walked behind Mo Bei, who was leading the other man and someone who looked a lot like an assistant or secretary, more than a bodyguard. In the way towards one of the meeting rooms on the second floor, Mo Bei asked Shang Qinghua to tell the manager he was going to be a bit late because a personal reason and where they were.

While Mo Bei’s two bodyguards stayed behind, Shang Qinghua entered along the other three to the meeting room. The place was simple and small with three couches, one low table at the center, some common decorations like plants and cover magazines, and a coffee table to serve either coffee or tea, but both refused the offer.

“Both of you wait outside, please.” Zhang Ning was talking to the pair of assistants, but looking only at him. He felt nervous, all the air between them was tense and cold, however, he didn’t move until Mo Bei nodded and approved the request to be sent outside.

Shang Qinghua was more than happy to comply because it was too much for someone like him who preferred running away from conflicts rather than face them. He had the time to observe the other man, the assistant; he was dressed in a suit too, he could be around 35 years old, in contrast with the man he came with who was like more than 40. He seemed like a mature and exceptional man, earnest and professional, kind of. Quite the opposite of him, at least he was using the outfit that Mo Bei chose for him, and not his usual sloppy style.

Yes, even after so much time working there and being obligated to renew part of his wardrobe, he still felt more comfortable on oversized clothes. At least one or two days in the week he would use that style, more if they were working in the building rather than going to any other location.

Suddenly some heels were heard walking quickly towards them, when he turned around, the manager was watching him with confusion and worry. Once in front of him, she took him by the shoulders and shook him. “What happened? It’s there any big problem?”

“No, no, wait, it just like I told you in the message,” he almost pleaded until she let him go, to fix her hair and see the other man waiting outside, who smiled at her and walked closer.

“You must be his manager, nice to meet you.” The man vowed and gave her a business card with Zhang Ning’s name, his post as some important executive at some important company. “My name is Rong Qianhui, I’m Boss Zhang’s assistant. Sorry that we came unannounced, my boss won’t take too much of mister Mo’s time.”

“Do you know or can tell for what he came for?” asked the manager, looking genuinely curious although she was guessing the answer already.

“I’m sorry, I only know that’s a personal matter.”

They had to wait around 30 minutes until they came out, none of them seemed angry or especially happy; with expressionless faces both bid farewells, with the last part said only by Zhang Ning: “Think about it, I’ll wait for your call.”

“Sorry, boss, it was unexpected.” To anyone, Mo Bei may look as calm as always, however, Shang Qinghua could feel like he was concerned about whatever they talked.

“Are you okay? Do you need the day off?” and the manager noticed too. She knew Mo Bei would refuse, still, she offered time for him.

“No, I’m fine, it’s nothing serious.”

After that meeting, Shang Qinghua curiosity about Mo Bei’s family and past was bigger, however, Mo Bei’s bad temper got worse since then, too; there was no way he could make any kind of question when that quick visit changed the mood between them too much. And it was not even his fault!

Everyone else noticed how exigent Mo Bei became, giving more work to Shang Qinghua than before, he became too picky with whatever his assistant gave him during his photo shoots, sometimes making him run to far away stores for specific snacks or drinks or, even, clothes. He became rudder than before, although Shang Qinghua never complained, bottling everything up, because nothing was new anyway.

The treatment lasted for more than a month, Shang Qinghua was feeling exhausted but not fed up, yet. He, kind of, liked his job and the payment, so he decided to endure as much as he could, knowing that Mo Bei’s temper would get better when his tantrum ends. And the manager and other coworkers were trying to make Mo Bei realized how tyrannical he became towards him, although they were as scared as him to speak about it clearly, only giving hints.

That day, Shang Qinghua went to bed almost until three in the morning, and even being that late, he didn’t finish the last reports because he gave all the priority to the chapters’ drafts he was still doing for the third season of his novel’s audio drama. He was more used to do it, so he worked faster, the thing that took the longest was to review his story to know what parts were next and had already happened, which he usually did while waiting for Mo Bei.

And the reports that Mo Bei asked him to do were easy to do but a bit time consuming because were mostly about trends, information about the works he was offered as voice actor or everything about the people he would work with. Lately he was asking to know how much his renown has grown in the last months and if it was raising or if it had stalled.

He was even dreaming about graphics and comparisons when his ringtone awoke him. With his head still muddy for the lack of sleep, he saw the name on his screen was Mo Bei, and that it was his third call.

“Oh shit, he’s gonna kill me,” the phone bounced over his hands when he got nervous and almost let it fall. With trembling hands he got to answer before the sound stopped. “I’m sorry, my alarm didn’t wake me up and I just heard the…”

“Shut up.” He was completely angry, mad, infuriated. His voice sounded more like a growl than a human voice and that made him shiver, ready to beg for his life. “Come to my place, now.”

“Yeah, I will just…”

“Now.” And he hung up.

With that, his mind cleared a bit, he stood up and went to the bathroom to take the fastest shower ever, he drank like two sips from the coffee he didn’t finish last night; shoved his laptop, his tablet and some papers into his backpack and ran to Mo Bei’s home.

He knew the place; he had been there a couple of times. Like the first time Mo Bei moved in because he was made to help the model to unpack his new furniture and the little belongings he had. It was a bigger apartment than his, more modern and luxurious looking, although the rent wasn’t as high as he thought the first time he saw it. He knew because he was Mo Bei’s accountant, ok?

However, it didn’t have anything that give away any knowledge about the owner of the place. The style was minimalistic and monochromatic, it was almost like his own simple apartment but with a better investment. At least Shang Qinghua recently bought some plants to help him distract himself from superfluous troubles. Like loneliness, a love that would never be corresponded which he treated it like a crush towards a man that barely treated him as an equal or showed anything different than annoyance, the huge overload of work he had recently and the emptiness of his already finished novel and the block towards the new one. Nothing really important, only useless thoughts.

He knew Mo Bei’s combination key to enter, yet he knocked because that was the right thing to do. Apart for the time he helped him unpack, he went to his house only to pick whatever Mo Bei forgot, so it had been more than a year since the last time he was there with him.

He waited until a face with the darkest of the expressions showed when the door was open, he almost ran away as if he was in the wrong address. Mo Bei opened and walked back inside, without telling him to enter or saying hi or thanks or anything!

Shang Qinghua closed the door after walking in, he hugged his backpack and walked behind Mo Bei who went back to his room. Now that he was thinking more clearly, he noticed that it was only seven in the morning, they usually went to their job at nine or ten if they didn’t have any early job.

“So… do you need me because…?” He dared to ask when the taller man lay down on his bed and covered himself with his sheets as if he was going back to sleep. To say that Shang Qinghua was confused was an understatement, he didn’t know what was going on.

“I won’t go to work today; I’m not feeling good.” His expression was like he wanted to cover his head with a pillow to not listen to him. “Go buy medicine and something for me to eat.”

“What? Did you catch a cold? On spring?” He wanted to touch Mo Bei’s forehead to see if he had a fever, however, Mo Bei slapped his hand away.

“No, I’m sick of the stomach.”

“Oh it’s only that? Let me see what medicines you have.” He went to the bathroom to look for those, but it was empty behind the mirror, the same in the pantry and every open cabinet or bookshelf he had. “So… where do you keep your medicines?”

“Didn’t I tell you to buy some? I don’t have anything.” Now he really covered his face with the pillow and lay over his side to shrink.

“Not even a thermometer or some band-aids?”

“Get out to buy the things already, my stomach hurts too much to have to bear with your idiocy.”

With a sigh, Shang Qinghua left the room again to walk towards the kitchen to assess how much of the food would be useful for a healthy and light meal. Barely two ingredients.

Whether he was going to get paid for the expenses of that day, he wasn’t stingy and bought a lot of healthy food, sport drinks to prevent dehydration, and he got every item necessary to fill his mirror cabinet with medicines and the sort with: painkillers, antiacids, anti-inflammatory meds, band-aids, gauzes, bandages, alcohol and peroxide, antiseptics, a thermometer, some pads to reduce the fever and masks. It was a heavy unforeseen expense, he had to use his savings for the new couch, still he didn’t want Mo Bei to keep living without medicines at the reach of his hands, even if he barely got sick.

After arriving, the first thing he did was to cook while he labelled the medicine with their preferable use and dose (according to the box’s instructions) and then putting it in its place. When the food was cooling, he went to see if Mo Bei had already awakened to take his temperature and consider if he needed a real doctor. Fortunately, he didn’t have a fever, so the healthy food, meds and rest would be enough.

“Hi, boss, yeah I’m at his place,” he answered the manager’s call at nine in the morning, he was serving the food with the phone stuck between his shoulder and his ear. “He’s a baby, you know him, but yes, I’m taking care of him, as always. Me rest? What’s that? I don’t know it.”

He enjoyed joking around with their boss when she was in a good mood. Of course she was worried about Mo Bei, she was about to call to a doctor to go see her favorite model, until Shang Qinghua convinced her that his illness wasn’t that severe. Being stronger than Mo Bei, even if it was only for a day or two, made him more daring so he was kind of bad-mouthing him.

“Qinghua, I want my breakfast, now,” came Mo Bei’s voice from his bedroom, he still sounded mad, so he had to apologize to the manager to finish and go to see him.

“Everything will be fine, I can take care of him, don’t worry. Yes, I’ll call if I can’t handle it, I’m fine. Bye.” He put his phone in his pocket and ran with the plate to give it to the scary man sitting in his bed with the arms over his chest. “Sorry, I was waiting for it to cool down, let me go fetch the tea for your meds.”

He moved fast so he hadn’t to be with him and his angry face for too long. While he was eating, Shang Qinghua heated the steam buns he bought for his breakfast. When the timer of the microwave went off, he heard Mo Bei shout from his bedroom: “You’re not eating your trash noodles on my house, are you?”

“Of course not, I knew it would be an insult to your fancy microwave, it’s only some steam buns, you want?” he took out his food from the appliance and blew to them. “Oh but sorry, you can eat it when you’re sick.”

With his laptop on the dining table, he began to work in everything he had to do. If Mo Bei hadn’t gotten sick, they would be in the company’s building arranging the next week schedule and Mo Bei in a photo shoot from some promos. It was the manager who told him to take the day off, because of course he didn’t have anything to do if Mo Bei weren’t there, and what he needed to do, he could do it wherever he was with only his laptop or tablet.

With his pending matters occupying his mind that day, he forgot entirely where he was until he was called back by a mail from the person in the other room. It wasn’t hard to guess that maybe he didn’t listen to the voiced call. It wasn’t mealtime yet, it had been only like four hours since he arrived, so he went to the bedroom to see what the other man wanted.

“Sit.” He pointed to the other side of his bed, Shang Qinghua was left speechless until he noticed Mo Bei’s angry glare, so he complied, sitting more in the air than in the bed, too afraid to get closer and make him madder. “Remember the man that came to see me? Uncle Zhang?”

So that man was really known by him, but why would he brough it back in that moment? Was what they talked about confounding him to the point of feeding his bad temper? Whatever the case, he nodded.

“He asked me to go to work with him, but first let me explain something.”

Mo Bei began explaining about how his father, owner by inheritance of a kind of important company of air conditioners, married his mother who was an actress. Both, the company’s name and his mother’s, weren’t famous nationwide, but had their considerable renown; even if their wedding didn’t reach the front page of the newspapers, it still was some famous news on the net.

However, his father’s family disapproved the marriage, they didn’t want their son married to someone whose fame and prestige was won by having a pretty face and good connections, as they said. They married either way, his father loved her too much and she was willing to endure the rude and despicable treatment from them just to stay with the man she loved. His father asked to his family to stop dissing her, of course they kept doing it, behind their backs and sometimes being too obvious.

That was until he, Mo Bei, was born. There was a silent accord to not tarnish him with all that talk because, whoever his mother, he was the heir of their company, so they needed to be in good terms. At least for the first years of his life, Mo Bei never heard any offensive comments. No until he was around twelve that their family ceased to be that discreet.

Sadly, his parents passed away when he was twenty, due to a car accident when both of them went overseas to one of the abroad branches of their company. Because he was still in college’s first years, his uncle, brother of his father, was the one selected to take care of the company while he was studying.

Things didn’t go well for him. Even after his mother was dead, his family was still dissing her, even making her like the one at fault that his father died. Then he learned that his uncle was the one who introduced his father to his mother, he was friend of her and had a crush, nevertheless, she married his brother instead of him. So the person who always roused the disrespectful comments was him.

Knowing that and tired of all the hate towards his mother, who was kind and composed, Mo Bei decided to leave his home and family. He went to his college friend’s place, he dropped out from school and jumped between jobs until he found the bar guard job, which was the best paid.

When he got the opportunity to get into the entertainment industry, he decided he wanted to make what his family despised so much from his mother, even if it weren’t the same media, the end to be popular would be enough. He took advantage of his good looks and luck, he wanted that someday his family would find out and come to make him stop.

However, what the man came for wasn’t to stop him for the Mo family’s pride, instead, he wished Mo Bei going back to his company and take his place as the head of it, because his uncle was leading the company into a path not all the board members agree to. If he took back his rightful place, he might save the company.

“And what did you decide?” asked Shang Qinghua when the model stopped talking.

“I don´t know.” Now Mo Bei wasn’t looking at him, his eyes focused on the empty cup he was holding. “I truly don’t want to go back to that kind of family, but my father was proud of his company, I don’t want to someday realize it has been sold or closed.”

“Then do both?” When he said that, Mo Bei’s expression was like a roller-coaster, going from disbelief to anger to confusion. Which made Shang Qinghua shrink a little before getting the courage to explain something he thought it was too obvious. “I mean… go to work there, try to get the company back, kick out your uncle and laugh at your family’s faces while keeping your job as model. It won’t be easy, that would made it more satisfying when you succeed, don’t you think?”

Silence remained between them for a long period of time; at first, Shang Qinghua was keeping his eyes on Mo Bei’s, but when the other didn’t take them off from him, he felt too self-conscious that he had to lower them to his hands. What he said was that undoable? Maybe Mo Bei was amazed of how much shit and brainless thoughts came from him, like his whole novel.

“Apparently, you’re the schemer here, so tell me, how should I do that?” His voice was as cold as ever, maybe as much as when he was really angry, like the last days, however, his face showed more like true curiosity.

“Well, let me think…” at first, he had an almost formed plan, until he saw Mo Bei’s changing mood was that he threw everything away. Even so, he just needed a few seconds to get everything back. “What about this? You go with boss Zhang and tell him you wanna help, maybe he won’t give you a position as a director, but he will keep you close to teach you how to manage the company, I guess because that’s what he seems to want. You, while working on the day with him, in the night you could take online classes to get your degree, probably you can come to an agreement with your university to ratify the classes you already took.”

“The hard part comes here, well another hard part, where you have to choose one to quit temporarily: either voice-acting or modelling. I think, whichever you choose, they’ll understand if you’re honest with them and remark how it will be until you get your degree and have a stable position on the company.” Now Shang Qinghua was getting excited, he loved schemes, he loved writing them and the exhilaration he felt when doing it was beyond the highest roller-coaster or any extreme sport, as if he had ever been or done any of those.

“If we think it better, you can tell the one you choose to keep as a weekend job, that in this next month you’ll work your ass off to complete as many offers as you can, so you can have some backup works if things get too busy in the company. That will be your decision, of course.” He felt his eyes shining while talking to Mo Bei, never noticing how the other looked surprised. “And now comes the best part… well, not the best part… maybe you won’t like it… but could be useful if…”

“Spit it out already. I’ll decide if I like it or not.” He cut him off when all his courage began to falter, as if he didn’t want to lose any of the ideas he was telling, as if he was considering them useful!

“Well… I could go work with you at the company, but hear me out, instead of me going the same division as you, I’ll go as close they can made me go to your uncle’s division. I’m a nobody, so they won’t care much about me while I’ll be trying to dig out everything I can about your uncle’s deeds or methods so you can best him, that if boss Zhang can help you, of course.”

And that was it. He could be a coward and an annoying guy, too easy to bully and who never defend himself; however, he had always had that sharp mind to seek revenge, maybe not for himself but for others. That made easy to write Luo Binghe’s revenge against everyone who wronged him, especially his shizun. It could be his only outstanding skill, which wasn’t something to be proud of, though.

“Let’s try it, then.” Shang Qinghua opened his eyes and mouth wide, until Mo Bei shoved to his mouth a napkin.

Chapter Text

To say that he was amazed by Shang Qinghua intelligence to make a plan that fast, was too underrated. Mo Bei has always thought about him being too gutless and, even, dumb to something like that, however it made sense if he remembered the few good parts of his novel were the things about schemes, revenge and hidden plot. Probably no one knew about that skill of his, considering how friendless he was.

When he decided to stay at Shang Qinghua’s place, after waking up and talking to his friend about him leaving him in some stranger’s house, he did it because Shang Qinghua seemed to be someone too easy to delude and use, he didn’t want nothing from him, obviously he wasn’t that kind of asshole, but decided he wanted some days far from his friend and his tendency to take in a different woman almost every day.

And when he wanted him as his assistant, it was more out of pity because he knew how much he hated his job, and a bit of gratefulness for taking care of him even if he was never too kind to him. Not that he had the strength to kick him out, anyway. He thought that maybe it could work for both of them, considering that he really knew how to take care of others, but not of himself. He was really relieved when the short man accepted the job offer.

Mo Bei didn’t notice at the beginning that, in fact, he was really interested in that stupid and cowardly man. He knew he was too weak to stand against whoever bullied him, he saw it clearly on that night out with their coworkers; but against him, Shang Qinghua always talked back and refute about everything, as if angering him was his hobby, although he never was too rude. What made him so angry that night at the bar was discovering that fact about being coward with anyone but him, or so he liked to think.

There was something else that made him curious. Shang Qinghua always acted as if he tried to please everybody, as if he didn’t like being hated by others, so it could be the reason he never stood up for himself. Which was contradictory with how secretive he was about himself. Whenever someone tried to know anything about him like hobbies, family, reasons to be where he was and stuff, he always joked, change the topic or gave questions as answers, never giving a true response. People said he was just shy, however he had lived with him for some days and Mo Bei never saw anything that gave his past away, his house was an empty shell, as if he didn’t want to anything about himself be exposed.

He read his novel completely, not because it was truly needed to understand his character, but because he wanted to know if there was something about himself. The only thing he found was the character with a similar name, however they had nothing in common, except for the schemer façade, apparently.

For Mo Bei, he was still a mystery, someone who was weak and strong, dumb and smart, observant and absent-minded. He wasn’t sure which was the real and which the false. That was part of what made him so interested in him, wanting to know more about him, but, at the same time, he didn’t want to know him.

Either way, after the next day when he was feeling a bit better, they went to talk to the manager. Shang Qinghua was about to stay out of the office, so he had to drag him from the collar of his cardigan to make him get in with him. It was his plan after all. Mo Bei chose to keep modelling and retire for some time from the voice-acting, so first they talked with her.

In the beginning she looked like she was against the idea until they talked about how Mo Bei’s family considered the entertainment industry. With that, she was more than happy to help them. On a serious note, she was frank and told them that their plan wasn’t as easy as it seemed, that it would be terribly hard for both, so they should think about it thoroughly. However, they both had done that since the idea was spoken, so they could only brace themselves and try, more Mo Bei than him, said Shang Qinghua.

With his voice-acting boss the talk went pretty much the same. He promised to finish all his lines as Mobei Jun, which was the only job in the do, declining all the offers he was considering before. They only wished him luck and a quick comeback.

The last one to hear about his resolution was Zhang Ning, to him he just kept to himself the decision to keep doing his model job because he wanted to go against his family. Although he probably understood it because he didn’t make any comment on it and only smiled.

With that, their true hell began. Zhang Ning found a perfect spot for Shang Qinghua, he said that, although most of Mo Bei’s uncle activities were known by the board members, there were some things that were too well hidden, so he working there was incredibly useful.

To call it a hell wasn’t because they were being dramatic, it truly was the hardest nine months Mo Bei has ever lived. He barely saw Shang Qinghua, because he was like an undercover agent, they couldn’t meet while working in the same building, which wasn’t hard because he was constantly learning in Zhang Ning’s office or going to any other section but Shang Qinghua’s. The only time they had to see each other was during weekends, and there sometimes it was hard because his assistant sometimes had to travel earlier than him to meet with the contractors and arrange things for it to be ready when Mo Bei arrived.

In spite of having only two days to work as a model, his job offers weren’t from places too far from their city, only to places where he could arrive in trips no longer than three hours and sometimes, he was in two different photo shoots in one day for it to be worth it. Mo Bei was amazed of how good his manager was to convince the most difficult clients to agree in closer places for the shoots or to do it only on weekends even if the places had more people around.

While with the company, he learnt everything from it in the first month, from all the branches nationwide and overseas, to all the departments and their activities, and pretty much the whole story of the company, the last ten years sells and everything it was needed for him to know as an owner. That was the hardest part, along with his studies.

At first, he asked Shang Qinghua to help with his assignments, with the less representatives and when more than one teacher asked for him to do readings and essays. Shang Qinghua helped him reading some of those and making summarizes for him to work with the essays, or he did entirely the essay if time was not enough for him.

With time going by, he had more time to focus more on his career, because at work the things to do were less demanding and faster to do. Maybe things didn’t become easier after those nine months, only a bit more bearable when he started to get used to it and made his own routine.

That was until one day, an issue came to be in his section. Zhang Ning hadn’t let him take care of everything, and still asked for his help to consider what to do. There was a delay in a big amount on components for their last big shipment because the manufacturers had some kind of problem with their production. The client was someone new and was already being too impatient with their shipment, so they had it rough to resolve the problem and to not anger the client or, for the worst, lose them.

After thinking about it the whole day, late in the night when he arrived home, he called Shang Qinghua to come over. The other man first told him that he was too busy, but with just a few commanding words, he had to agree. In less than an hour he was there. Mo Bei hadn’t seen him in a couple of weeks, he was really busy with assignments and office work, even in the photo shoots he had to travel without him; so the first thing he noticed was the huge black shadows under his eyes.

Nevertheless, he needed his help, so didn’t comment on it, only giving him some coffee while the shorter man opened his computer and apologized because he had some urgent things to finish but he would listen. Of course Mo Bei closed the computer so he would only paid attention to him when he related all the issue with the delayed components and shipments.

“Have they try using parts from defective devices? Obviously, parts that weren’t damaged” Shang Qinghua said while seemingly be thinking.

“Yes, but there was not enough.”

“It’s truly not an option to ask for a few days more and the promise of a compensation?” He was rubbing his eyes until they were too red, that and that his ideas weren’t useful, were making his rage get bigger.

“No, I told you already why.”

“Then I’m sorry, I can’t think of anything else, I’m not that familiar of how they manage that or whatever. I don’t know.”

How was possible that someone who always found like five solutions to one problem, was now acting as if he wasn’t even paying attention to him? He kept rubbing his eyes and scratching his hair, not even drinking the coffee he offered, and it was more than notorious how distracted he seemed, not even looking him at the eyes.

“I’m tired but I need to finish those reports, let me do it and tomorrow I’ll try to find something, I guess I just need to investigate the…”

“What are you tired for? The one working and study at the same time it’s me and I hadn’t asked you to help me in my essays, so why are you so busy, huh?” Now all he could see was red, the disappointment because Shang Qinghua wasn’t able to help him that fast was breaking all his rationality. He had promised to always help him, didn’t he? So why now was taking whatever he had to do as priority over him? Was he enjoying too much working for his uncle that he had forgotten about him? Could he, maybe, be making things difficult for him because his uncle has convinced him about it?

“You’re so useless, you barely had things to do and when I ask you one thing, you can’t do it. Did you become dumb or something? Why is it that you can’t help?” Until that moment, Shang Qinghua was now looking directly at him, as if he just discovered where he was, as if he had just awakened. Mo Bei thought that he would finally realize about his mistake and try to fix it, throw some flattering words to apologize or something.

However, the outcome was the opposite.

“Yes, I’m a useless trash who can’t do anything right, I’m not worth of the chances you had gave me, I’ll fail you now and ever because I’m an idiot, but didn’t you know that already? Where does the surprise come from? I knew someday you would get tired of me, because I know how worthless I am, so I kept doing everything you asked, the better I could, I even endured being your punching bag every time you got too stressed or angry, yes, you never hit me but who needs physical pain when you only hear how you were looked for out of pity and how you’re always waiting the moment I’ll fail?”

Shang Qinghua stood up from where he was seated, his hair was already messy when he came, but now it even fell off his hairband. He had spoken up, the loudest he had ever heard him speak, and with eyes full of tears he managed to contain until his last words.

“Then, don’t stress anymore because my incompetence, look for someone who fits in the job as you please and leave me alone. Here, this have all the schedule for your modeling job, and I’ll sent to you and the manager everything I had left to hand over. You won’t have to see my useless ass ever again.” Shang Qinghua left the tablet on the table, he took his laptop and walked towards the door.

“If you go, don’t ever think about showing your face to me ever again.” Mo Bei was sure that it was just the heat of the moment, however he was truly enraged, Shang Qinghua had never done something like that in which he left with the last words.

“Don’t worry, I’ll make sure you don’t see me.” When he said that, his voice was now too calm, something new for him, but his anger blind him and didn’t turn to see him close the door.

Mo Bei got up from where he was and went to his room to make a mess, only then he could cool off his head for a bit and be back to thinking about what was important: his job.

The next day when he went to work, Zhang Ning had told him that the issue had been solved. They asked one of their oldest clients, whose had some orders in the wait, to wait a bit longer because the missing materials while they gave the finished devices to this new client they didn’t want to lose. With some compensation to the loyal client, they wouldn’t get angry for waiting a bit more.

Mo Bei felt relaxed now, his head was aching since last night because the pressure, but hearing Zhang Ning with less anxiousness, made him feel relieved. He knew he still had too much to learn, so he occupied his free moments to read more from the books that Zhang Ning has recommended to him and the ones the school made him buy.

His anger towards Shang Qinghua, however, hadn’t disappeared yet. He didn’t get a message from him, of course he was waiting to hear him apologize, and only came some mails he decided to ignore because were things related to the other job.

A week went by and, only then, he did notice how quiet his life was. He wasn’t contacted by Shang Qinghua, as if he were the offended and was waiting for an apology. When he saw his manager on the weekend, he didn’t hear anything about Shang Qinghua, nor he saw him; his pride made him reluctant to ask about him, and if they didn’t ask, it could only mean that they knew they fought. It was pretty obvious he had run to them to cry, who else he would go to?

Or so he thought until he received a call from his manager on Wednesday. “Have you called xiao Shang?”

“Why? Is he not more friendly and trusty towards you?”

“Whoa there, stop, what’s wrong with you? I just asked.” After listening to her become all serious, as the older adult she was, he felt a bit guilty. “I hadn’t heard from him, he sent me his work and reports almost five days ago and told me he wasn’t coming, but I never thought he referred as never coming back. What happened?”

“Ask him, he was the one who left from my house telling me like he was quitting.” The rage from before was getting back. “And, seriously, he surely talks to you more than me.”

“What are you talking about? He and I had never talk about something that wasn’t work, heck he never even complained when all of us could see how bad you were treating him when all about your company started.” She was angry too; it was too noticeable from her voice. “What do you argue for? And, seriously, I’m worried about him not picking up since last Monday when I tried to reach him.”

“He…” Mo Bei doubted his words, if he were to explain, it would seem a stupid reason to argue, and it could mean he was at fault. When he was not. “He didn’t do what I asked him to do…”

“…” And that silence made him feel more stupid that he already was feeling. “Ok, how many times he had failed you?”

“Not once… but he was using excuses, saying he was too tired and had too much to do, when he clearly was not.” Mo Bei decided to use that card, about how his reasons to not help were lies.

“Fuck dammit, tell me you didn’t tell that to his face.” It was clear that now her anger was bigger than his, so he remained quiet. “What the fuck is wrong with you, Mo Bei?!” He was surprised, now he was being reprimanded. For what? “Let me count to ten…” She was taking deep breaths, that much she was enraged.

“My dear Mo Bei… it may be hard for you, I can guess how hard it’s for you to work, learn everything about how to manage a whole company and study at the same time, all of us knew it would be hard, ok?” she wasn’t waiting for a true answer, so he waited for her to continue. “But do you have the slightest idea of what xiao Shang has been doing? What his job was and what was doing as an assistant?

“No.” There was nothing else to say, of course he didn’t know but what could he be doing? Reports over accounting someone else has done already, because they hadn’t given him some high post in the office. And for the modeling job? He was in charge of making the arrangements to travel, to schedule and that sort of thing, doesn’t he? If he told that to her, he knew it wouldn’t be the right answer.

“The one who has convinced the hardest clients to not go far for the shoots has been him. He went and looked for alternative places and showed to them, he helped me to convinced them about the schedule and he’s the one running here and there to make sure the places were delimited so outsiders wouldn’t interfere.” The manager voice was softer, as if she wanted for him to realize that Shang Qinghua hadn’t been slacking or doing the minimum. Was he really in the wrong? “Please, Mo Bei, think about it and call him, he’s not answering to me but maybe to you he’ll do it. I’m worried.”

With that, she hung up. Mo Bei’s rage had lowered, but not entirely dissipated. He couldn’t be wrong, right? Even so, he felt that something was off. He may had been rude towards him, but why did he jump off like that and went as far as quitting?

He decided to go to Shang Qinghua’s division, maybe he was still working there, and the tantrum only reached the places where they could see each other. He was against calling him, not yet.

Before going, he talked to Zhang Ning to know when the lunchtime was in his division, it was the best option to find him without having to go look for him directly at the office and blew off his cover. Fortunately, at the time they began their lunch, the cafeteria was almost empty, at least for like ten minutes until the other group came.

When he arrived, he went to a pair or men who were in a table. To his luck, they were coworkers of the same office.

“Shang Qinghua? No, he hadn’t come since… well I guess like a week?” said one of them.

“And frankly, we’re not surprised, more like relieved, he had it rougher than anyone should have,” the other man added, which made the first to hit him with the elbow as if they shouldn’t talk about it.

“Tell me why,” Mo Bei used the coldest glare he had to make them talk.

“W-we can’t… we might lose our job…” His fear was real, so he took him by the collar of his jacket and dragged him to the nearest bathroom. “Please, I don’t want to be fired.”

“You won’t, if they fire you, I’ll hire you back, I’m Mo Bei.” With that, the other’s mouth opened wide, everybody has heard about the returning of the heir and his fight to get back his company, it was the most popular gossip around there.

“Do you promise?” To that, Mo Bei gave him one of his business cards that had his phone number. “The thing is, our division chief, I swear I don’t know why, had something against accountant Shang. He always gave him the hardest assignments, and too much for one person to handle, none of us could help him so he constantly either went back too late to his home or take things to finish at his house. And he never came to have lunch because he always had too much to do.”

“But the worst part… the chief was too rude towards him, at any tiny mistake he would be called to his office and be yelled at, he always used derogative words, all of us could heard most of it when he shouted and even we felt bad, until things started to go beyond that.” The man was squeezing his hands, he was too nervous and didn’t look at him in the eyes. “Sometimes, Chief spilled his tea over him, we told him to report the treatment because it was wrong but he told us he needed the job so he would endure, but the last two times… Chief made him kneel, maybe even kowtow, and kicked him. We don’t know what his mistakes were but that was too much.”

“The last day he came, even our ears hurt of how foul the things he said were. And that time he kicked like twice, accountant Shang felt sick all day, he even ran to puke after that, but he stayed to work until late, we too had things to do and left late but he stayed longer.” The man shook his head, only then he raised his head to look at him. “I don’t know why he endured that much, maybe he needed the money, but it was too much for him. I’m happy that he didn’t come back.”

“Have you spoken to him recently?”

“No, we were nothing more than acquaintances, none of us was close to him.”

“Thanks, go back.”

The man seemed like he wanted to ask something but decided to not do so. Mo Bei stayed in there for some seconds, his hand clutching hard to the sink until his knuckles became white. Then, he went back to his own office, inside he dialed Shang Qinghua’s number, however, the only thing he received was that the phone number was disconnected or out of the service area.

“Uncle Zhang, I need to leave early,” he said to Zhang Ning, who looked surprised for some seconds. “It’s important, I don’t think I’ll be back today.”

“Sure, don’t worry, if anything happens, I’ll call you.”

With that, he left in a hurry. Now he was sure that everything was wrong, their fight was stupid, and now he knew why things went that way. And it was his own fault, he wasn’t angry with Shang Qinghua anymore, but with him for saying things without thinking. He noticed Shang Qinghua was unwell but never put the finger on it. He had deep bags under his eyes; when they were working in the modeling company, he gained some weight, but last time he saw him, he was too thin, a lot more than when they met; all of his face screamed how exhausted he was, but he never asked for help, from no one.

When he arrived to Shang Qinghua’s place, he felt nervous for some seconds, he had to gather the courage to knock. There wasn’t any answer. He knocked like a whole five minutes, thinking that maybe the other was still angry. However, no one opened.

He called him from outside a couple of times until he decided to enter on his own. He knew the combination from one time he went with him to look for something, he didn’t have any reason to know it, only he felt it was fair since he knew his.

The first thing he saw when he entered, was that the house was a mess. Sheets of paper and things like pillows were in the floor, his phone was not far from the door, with the screen smashed as if he threw it away with too much force. The sink was empty, he didn’t have time to look at the refrigerator, he only walked to his bedroom.

A sigh almost escaped from him when he noticed Shang Qinghua was in his bed, curled up with the bed sheets almost over his head. “Qinghua,” he called waiting for the other to show some surprise or, maybe, to yell at him. Anything.

The quietness lingered inside the room. The only perceptible movement from the smaller man was his slowed breathing, as if he really were sleeping. “Hey, Qinghua, stop pretending.” This time he shook him by the shoulder, the only response was him curling up even more. “Common, we need to talk, get up.”

Without any other answer, Mo Bei decided to be a bit more aggressive. He pulled off the sheets to uncover half of his body. The normal part was that he was using what he considered his pajamas, the abnormal was how the clothes were stuck to his body, almost completely drenched with sweat, he knew it was because his face was the same and his cheeks were a bit flustered. The worst was his erratic breathing motion and the way he looked like he was in pain.

“Qinghua! Wake up! Hey!” Now Mo Bei was freaking out. How long has he been sick? There wasn’t any wet cloth or medicine’s box near to indicate that he had been taking care of his cold, nor empty bowls of food. He almost missed the view of his trashy instant noodles. After a bit more shakes, he decided he needed help.

He didn’t have a car, he regretted not buying it when he had the chance, so he could only call to the manager and pray she was free, or else, he would have to call for a cab and go to the nearest hospital with an unconscious man in his arms. “Sent me the address, I’ll be there right away.”

He heard her tossing everything she had in her hands, only because he even listened to that, he felt a little bit less anxious. The building wasn’t that far from there, and maybe in like ten minutes she would be there, so he used the time to put some decent pants on him and change his shirt for a dry one, which made him see one almost-faded bruise on his abdomen, and how much weight he lost. Not wishing to lose any more time, he went to the bathroom to get a wet cloth and try to lower his fever.

Once the manager came, he carried him to the car and seated in the backseat without releasing him. Although the manager looked as worried as him, she didn’t talk.

Chapter Text

Shang Qinghua was quickly admitted while the manager filled the admission forms, she was more thoughtful and brought Shang Qinghua’s insurance documents they had at the office. Leaving Mo Bei standing in front of the door where they had taken him.

Only when the manager took him to seat in the waiting room, he told her what he had heard from his coworkers. It was obvious that his uncle, somehow, discovered who worked Shang Qinghua for, so he allowed his subordinate to make things hard for him, as if telling him: “You want to know what I do, I’ll let you know but you’ll have to pay the price”.

Although the worry for Shang Qinghua’s condition was bigger, he couldn’t let aside his anger towards his uncle. Because he knew that everything he did to Shang Qinghua, were things to make him angrier and to make him rush and make mistakes. However, none of them guessed how much Shang Qinghua wanted to endure to protect Mo Bei. Why? Why was he so eager to sacrifice so much for him? It’s not that he had some kind of debt, it was more like Mo Bei owed him. It didn’t make sense. Nor did it make sense how angry Mo Bei was because someone has toyed with and hurt him, it was the same thing he felt when their coworkers were harassing him in that night out.

“Hey, look at me.” When the manager’s hand touched his hand, he discovered how strong his hold had been, almost drawing blood from where his nails sank in his palm. “You need to think clearly, don’t let you rage blind you, okay? Yes, we still don’t know how bad his condition is, but you need to focus. We know he never asks for help, but maybe this time he was trying to not distract you, which I know is foolish, so I’ll admonish him later, but you can’t.”

“You need to be there for him, to apologize and make him understand you don’t think whatever you told him as true. You and I know how kind and hardworking he is, he’s strong even if he doesn’t believe in himself. When you get to talk to him, don’t make excuses or shift the blame, not that you have to take all the blame, that’d be uncomfortable too, just admit your mistakes and search for a way to compensate him, but talk.”

They waited in silence from some minutes more, although Mo Bei was feeling it like hours. It was then that he got curious and asked the manager if she or the hospital had contacted Shang Qinghua’s family, to which she responded that when he filled his insurance form, he left in blank the space where the emergency contacts were. She was the one who told him it couldn’t be left that way, so with an embarrassed smile he asked permission to put her and Mo Bei as his emergency contacts, which obviously she conceded. The manager decided not to make questions about why he didn’t have anyone, that was not the right moment.

A little bit more after that, a doctor finally came and called them like “patient Shang’s friends”. He led them to Shang Qinghua’s room and began with his report telling their findings: severe anemia, malnutrition and subsequent cold caused by his immune system weakened.

“Does he normally skip meals? Gain and losses weight constantly?” asked the doctor to keep filling his clinical sheet.

“He only does it when he’s under much stress, and we don’t notice in time,” explained the manager while Mo Bei had his eyes stuck on the sick man lying in the hospital bed.

“Well for now his fever is being controlled, but we’ll have to wait until he wakes up to know if there’s been severe damage or not, considering we can’t know for sure when the fever started and how high it’s been. Apart of that, he’ll be fed by a nasogastric feeding tube until he wakes because the nutrients from the IV won’t be enough. You may stay with him until visit hours are over. Any questions?”

Only then, the doctor stepped aside for them to walk to him. He was looking only a tad better than when he found him: his cheeks less reddened, his face not drenched in sweat, his breathing steady and his brows less furrowed. If he weren’t looking pale, he would think that Shang Qinghua was just sleeping.

The manager stayed with them for an hour more until she thought Mo Bei was less stressed and Shang Qinghua looked stable. She promised to come when she left from work in the afternoon, while Mo Bei said he would be there since the beginning of the visiting hours, which has already discussed with Zhang Ning to take it as some days off. He wanted to be there when he wakes up.

The second day went without changes, Mo Bei spent his day sitting in the chair close to his bed, reading books about administration and legal procedures, he wanted to bring down his uncle, now more than ever, so he would use every free time he had to make his plan while consulting with Zhang Ning about the possibilities and any information he needed. Maybe when Shang Qinghua awakes, he would listen to his plan and help him making it better. That if, Mo Bei wins him back with the apology he had been practicing almost all nights and in his way to the hospital. With those, his mind was distracted enough to not think about how scared he felt if Shang Qinghua wouldn’t wake up or would end with irreparable damage, of course he would take care of him in any case.

It was in the afternoon of the third day that he noticed Shang Qinghua moving. At first his fingers were twitching, his eyes moving behind his eyelids and his lips opening and closing by a bit. He came closer and took his hand, and resisted the urge to call the nurse until he saw he wasn’t fully awakening, more like having a troubled dream.

When the nurse came, he was clenching his hands with too much strength and trying to curl himself up, against Mo Bei hold, who was pressing his shoulders. Both of them kept calling him as his movements became more aggressive and his voice came low saying “I’m sorry, sorry, won’t do it, can’t do it. Sorry.”

Another nurse and the doctor arrived, asking Mo Bei to wait outside until they get to stabilize the patient. He didn’t want to leave his side, he was worried, however the nurse told him he shouldn’t see him like that and that they would take care of him. The nurse, although shorter, pushed him towards the door. If he wasn’t that shocked for what was happening, no one would have been able to move him.

Mo Bei walked from one side to the other, trying to identify any voice coming from inside, even if the door blocked the sound perfectly. He waited ten minutes, that felt like ten hours, until they allowed him to reenter.

“Apparently it was a nightmare, a terrible one it seems, that brought back his fever. We gave him a light sedative, so today he won’t wake up. We still can’t assess how is his condition, however it’s a good sign that he dreamt and had a response to a nightmare, although too violent.”

As the doctor said, Shang Qinghua didn’t wake up or, even, moved in his sleep the rest of the day, still, he kept his guard until the time to go arrived. It was until the next day, when he was coming back from taking a call from Zhang Ning, that Shang Qinghua reacted.

This time, he called the nurse right away while he took Shang Qinghua’s hand and called him. He opened his eyes slowly, as if he had awakened from any normal night, but when he realized the ceiling was different, he looked around nervously, just when the nurse was arriving.

It wasn’t hard to noticed how he was panicking. “Qinghua, I’m here, look at me,” said Mo Bei still holding his hand, Shang Qinghua’s eyes were wide open, as if he couldn’t believe what he was seeing, when the nurse approached him, he lost focus on Mo Bei and started to hyperventilate, his eyes moving from one thing to another.

“Mister Shang, do you hear me?” asked the nurse, moving her hand in front of his eyes until he was looking at her. “I need you to relax, you’re in a hospital because you were sick, remember? You were brought by your friends.”

As she was talking slowly to him, helping him to breath now and then, the other nurse arrived with the doctor. Once again, they asked Mo Bei to wait outside, which he had to obey.

He had to wait more than before, making him feel anxious. He received as an answer from the manager that she was coming in some minutes, that after he told her about Shang Qinghua waking up. He was sacred that maybe they couldn’t control his panic attack, which he couldn’t understand because never before he saw him like that. The most probable reason of their delay was how they were verifying in he had any kind of damage or pain.

When his worry was getting at an anxiety level, they finally opened the door to meet him. The doctor told him that, apparently, he was fine, but they needed one or two days more before discharging him. He asked him to not disturb him with much information, to make him talk just a bit and to not exhaust him. After that, he let him get in when the nurses were finishing the temperature and blood pressure measurements.

“Hi… how are you doing?” He wanted to slap himself in the face for his question, he knew that the nurses and the doctor might have done that same question before. Truth was that he didn’t know how to begin.

“I’m alive, that’s something.” Shang Qinghua’s answer was nor good nor bad, he felt conflicted about it. Was that out of relief or regret? The line in between was too thin, Mo Bei wasn’t able to pinpoint to which side his response was guided.

He didn’t want to lose more time trying to understand it, so he decided it was the moment to apologize. “Qinghua, listen, I’m sorry for everything I said that day, I shouldn’t have talked like that, whether I knew or didn’t know about what you were doing. I have never believed in anything I said, I don’t think anything I said was true.” Mo Bei didn’t want to repeat the words he said that night because he remembered how hurt Shang Qinghua looked that day, even if he didn’t notice in the moment because his rage was too strong.

“You may not believe me, I’m pretty sure you won’t and I’m not trying to make excuses because I know my behavior was terrible, however I want you to understand that I was scared, that fear turned into irrationality and rage, for a moment I thought you were working for my uncle, I’ve been betrayed before, you going to him wasn’t hard to guess in my head, at least until I heard what was happening in your office.”

Shang Qinghua was expressionless through his whole discourse, his eyes focused on his hands that were grabbing the bedsheet, but when those last words came from Mo Bei’s mouth, the hold became stronger, as his brows knitted together after some short seconds of shock, if Mo Bei hadn’t been seeing his face all the time, he might had missed that small change.

“Nothing happened there,” he said. It was obvious that either he was embarrassed of that, or he still didn’t want to cause problems. If he didn’t want to talk about it yet, or with him, he wouldn’t make him.

“The thing is I trust you, more than anyone I have ever met, I trusted you since the day we met and fully realized it when I lived at your place, I didn’t come back to you because I was pitying you, I know I said it like that, but I was lying to myself, I came back because I wanted you at my side. I knew I could trust you to help me reach the place I wanted.” Mo Bei moved closer, he wanted to take his hand but resisted because he didn’t know if he were still angry and, more importantly, he wasn’t sure if the other would dislike it.

“I’ve been a dick to you, I know, and I understand if you hate me for it, but I can only tell you that you’re the only one who had seen me in some of my worst. However I promise I won’t be like that anymore, I want to take care of you as you have taken care of me all this time. You don’t have to go back to work if you don’t like it, but please let me take care of you, don’t leave my life.”

He wanted to repay for all the things he had done for him, only that if he were to use those words, the other may misunderstand and say that he didn’t owe nothing, he knew because he would say the same to whoever told him that. So he decided to go the other way around. Maybe if he was that honest and open, Shang Qinghua might forgive him a bit and don’t walk away from his life, as he intended to do.

However, the outcome was beyond all his expectations, again. Tears began to come down Shang Qinghua’s eyes. Was his anger too big that he started crying? He, kind of, guessed he was that type of person who couldn’t argue without crying, but why did he not shout or insult him before crying? It couldn’t be that he was moved to tears by his words, could it? For the first time in his life, Mo Bei was panicking. Well maybe the second time, after he did it when he found a sick Shang Qinghua.

“You’re such a selfish prick!” And there was the shout. “Why do you only think in yourself? What if I don’t want to be with you anymore? Everything about you only give me troubles so why would I listen to you and keep doing whatever you tell me to do? I don’t believe you, that’s true, you won’t change because no one does it, you will be the same rude fucker you had always been and I’m sick of it and sick of you! Get out!”

“Woah, what’s happening here?” When the manager entered the room, Shang Qinghua had almost risen from his bed and Mo Bei had backed away a bit. While the first one was looking between hurt and furious, the other was like scared. “Mo Bei, could you wait a bit outside? Or go home, you need to rest, please.”

Mo Bei was lost for words; he didn’t know what he wanted to do or what he should do, so the manager intervention saved him from doing whatever he may had regretted later. He took his things and walked outside, when he passed close to her, she whispered: “It’s ok, let me handle it. Rest.”

Truth to be told, the manager heard a big part of Mo Bei’s apology, she decided to stay out of the room until he had finished, not because she wanted to eavesdrop but because she didn’t want to interfere with the mood in the room. She was kind of amazed of how well chosen were Mo Bei’s words, everything carefully planned to not cause any misunderstandings or to be too rude.

If she hadn’t listened to him, she would have taken Shang Qinghua’s side when he started yelling at him. The best she could do was to be impartial, while helping Shang Qinghua to realize that he hadn’t been the only one taking care of the other.

“So, tell me, what does that jerk told you? Did he come with a whole bunch of excuses and refused to acknowledge his mistake? I don’t really know what made you fight, he only told me he was a dick and said rude things to you or something.” It was best to feign ignorance about some parts, to know which will be Shang Qinghua’s point of view.

“No, he didn’t give any, or I don’t think so, I don’t know.” It was obvious that his mind was too confounded.

“I could swear he did, why else would he be a selfish prick? Besides always asking for you to do everything, if I had known he was making you find ways to keep the hardest clients, I would have stopped you.”

“No! He didn’t ask me to do anything… nothing more than what we told you before going to the other job…” The manager had to hide his smile, she knew he was beginning to see things differently, although it wasn’t enough yet, which meant that she had to push him more.

“Then? What stupid thing he said to you? You need to be clearer, or I won’t have enough rational reasons to yell at him.”

“He… he asked me to stay with him… and let him take care of me…”

“Oh… now I understand a bit more,” the manager softened her voice and expression, he took Shang Qinghua’s hand that was holding tightly the sheets. She was going to give the last push before trying to open his eyes entirely. “Those words must have really hurt you, now you hate him so much that you don’t want to see him again. And that’s fine, you have the right to be upset. If you wanna keep working with me, I can assign you a new partner and make sure you don’t see him again, or until you’re ready, and I’ll ask him to no get close to you. It’s OK if you prefer to look for a different job too, I’ll support whichever decision you make.”

“No, well, yes but not that… it’s just that…” each one of his words stepped over the next one, he was trying to keep them inside, the manager was sensing that struggle. “I don’t think it’s fair, my reasons to stay with him are completely different from his, and whenever he gets angry and says hurtful words… it hurts harder that any stranger telling me I’m an idiot… I can’t be with him anymore when I do everything for him while he just sees me as only a trusty assistant.”

The manager watched him, he had his eyes stuck, again, in his bedsheets. To many, his words may be a bit confusing, but no one but she knew better. She had seen, for the past two and a half years, one pinning for the other. Each one of them caring for the other in their unique ways, afraid to be too obvious, and at the same time, keeping their distance between each other.

She may not be too old, and yet, she had seen a lot of people fall in love in many different ways. This was nothing new, so she kind of knew how to open the eyes for a new pair of dorks in love. “Xiao Shang, I want you to listen to what I’m gonna tell you, don’t you dare to interrupt me and listen till the end.” With a confused nod, she finally had his eyes on her.

The first thing she made him remember was what she had told him that very first time they met, about how Mo Bei said that he was his assistant and nobody else’s errand boy, so no one was allowed to ask things from him but himself. She told him how he always asked for big bags of snacks and bottles of tea, so he could share with Shang Qinghua, which always made him complaint about how Mo Bei asked for more than he could eat. Maybe the snacks and drinks weren’t his favorites, but were good for both, and from time-to-time Mo Bei would let him choose his own snacks along with whatever Mo Bei wanted.

And how every time they had to go to fancy meals with some clients, Mo Bei always demanded that his assistant was to participate. For all that matters, Mo Bei always cared of what Shang Qinghua ate, trying to help him go for healthy meals more than instant or second-rate meals, making him had enough and good lunch and dinner before letting him go home. Or how Mo Bei never let him go home too late, and when it was unavoidable because the shoots were in nighttime, they went together, either to one or the other’s place.

The manager let him know, too, that the idea of the change of clothing style was hers, and that at the beginning Mo Bei was against because Shang Qinghua didn’t like being criticized. When she got to convince him, he was the one that paid entirely for what they bought. The last thing she told him was that Mo Bei sent to jail the section chief that mistreated him.

“Whaaat? Is that possible?” Shang Qinghua asked dumbfounded.

“He sued him with the evidence he gathered from your coworkers, they still need your testimony, but he made sure that even if you don’t want to present it, the bastard will be fired, finned and had every company known about his deeds.”

With that, Shang Qinghua didn’t know what to say. The manager saw him with disbelief over all his face, whether he felt that it was a just outcome or not, he wouldn’t tell in that moment, so her job was done.

Now with all what she said, he could start to see Mo Bei with different eyes, even if she feared that both were too stubborn to acknowledge the other’s feelings, yet. So it was still a long way to go. When she called Mo Bei, after leaving the hospital, he wasn’t sure if he should go the next day, she had to tell him that he HAD to go so the other could feel the honesty in his words. The only suggestion: he should remain silent until Shang Qinghua talked to him.

Chapter Text

Shang Qinghua barely slept through the night, he was tossing and turning in bed with his head filled in confusion. It couldn’t be true all what the manager told him, although there were not enough reasons for her to take Mo Bei’s side in that matter, not when she was so eager to protect him from Mo Bei and don’t let him see each other again. Was that a lie so he would trust her? But why? If he were to disappear from their lives, they wouldn’t lose anything, he wasn’t the model, nor the manager. It didn’t make sense unless she genuinely believed in Mo Bei’s honesty.

In the morning, Mo Bei arrived when he had already awakened, after his first checkup from the nurse and the doctor. He came to the room after speaking briefly with the nurse, he sat in the same visit’s couch he was yesterday, before Shang Qinghua yelled and made him go. He came in silence and kept quiet while taking out some books and a notebook from his bag, barely looking at him, who wasn’t looking directly at him either.

Shang Qinghua thought that he would try to say something again, maybe more apologies or something about his offer, maybe something if the manager told him more than she should have. However, Mo Bei didn’t utter a word while being in there and whenever his phone rang, he would walk to exit the room and take the call. Shang Qinghua didn’t know how to take his behavior, he couldn’t remember if, in his rage, he told him to shut up or something like that, the most he remembered was his “get out”.

That silence remained between them, he tried to get distracted by watching TV, although he couldn’t stop himself from looking at the other man every now and then. Even with how often he was seeing him, he never caught Mo Bei looking back at him, which kind of disappointed him, at the same time he was relieved that he could maintain his angry mood.

Around two in the afternoon the nurses came to the next checkup, Mo Bei exited without them saying anything, so Shang Qinghua stared at his back while he was taking out his phone and walking to the hall.

“Did the both of you fight?” asked the nurse, a lady at her fifties. Since he woke up, she has been one of the kindest nurses that had treated him, he even wished that if he had a grandmother, she was like her.

“I guess so… he was being… rude.”

“Him? How so? With us he had been so sweet and attentive,” her smile was too pure and honest, which made Shang Qinghua frown because he couldn’t picture Mo Bei with those adjectives. “In the morning he arrives with coffee and bread for the nurses in this floor and some for the receptionist and the doctor, at noon he gives us some snacks and at night he delivers more coffee, everything for the different shifts.”

“He’s bribing you.” The moment he talked, he regretted it, she was too sweet to receive that kind of mock, even if it was against Mo Bei. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be, he hasn’t been the first one to do so when they only want for their family or friends to be treated with the utmost care, though he’s one of the few that has truly asked of what we wanted.” She was now checking his blood pressure after taking out the thermometer. “I don’t know neither of you, but you look like a kind man and he too, a man you scared so much,” she laughed softly, not at all like a mock, it was an honest amused laugh. “I wasn’t down there but the girls that were there said he was looking as pale as you when he came in with you in his arms and that he never let you go until they brought a stretcher and the doctor admitted you, they even said that the beautiful lady that was with him had to call him so he wouldn’t follow the ones that took you.”

Shang Qinghua frowned even more, that didn’t sound like Mo Bei at all, but who else could it be? There was no one that would visit him there beside the manager and him. “Maybe he was feeling guilty.”

“Why? Did he make you sick? Was it his fault?” The way she looked at him was full of concern, she wasn’t being nosy for the sake of it, she genuinely wanted to know if things were deeper and darker that it seemed so she could help.

“No, no! Don’t misunderstand, we argued but I felt sick some days afterwards… while sulking…” he pouted without noticing, that nurse really took out his most childish self and he didn’t want it.

“Oh dear, I was scared, trust me when I tell you that I had seen those cases when the abuser is nice with everybody but a violent trash with their couple or child or parents.” When she said it, she was angry, he never imagined before how she looked with a frown until then, which made him feel a bit guilty. “But I’m glad that his kindness is true, he never leaves to eat, he says he eats when at home but who knows, he doesn’t like leaving your side for too long, the longer is when he tries to hide, some girls had seen him like he’s about to break down, but he never does.”

“Hear me here gossiping, I’m sorry dearie, I’ll go now so he can go back.” The nurse patted his hand with a warm smile, and before walking to leave, she took his hand and said: “If whatever he did wasn’t physical and can be forgiven if he changes, forgive him, he looks like he’s suffering from regret.”

After saying that and giving another smile, she left. This time Mo Bei didn’t come back right away, he took like ten minutes more until he was back in his chair without making any noise. Now he was feeling awkward, and kind at fault of how he treated him when he only wanted to apologize.

Even so, he was angrier because it seemed as if everybody was determined to make him look like the one in the wrong. He may have overreacted, although he had an honest reason. Mo Bei hurt him with the worst words he could have ever told him, yeah, he maybe didn’t know what he was doing because he didn’t let him know, but that didn’t give him the right to think he was doing nothing. He was clearly tired, the both of them looked awful but they were too immersed in their jobs that they didn’t saw at the other carefully.

Nevertheless, the thing that made him mad was that the words hurt him because Shang Qinghua allowed it. He loved Mo Bei, he had known that after almost a year working with him, he knew that his attraction turned into love when he was taking care of him and stopped imagining a life without him. He knew it was impossible, he told himself that being at his side until he was needed was enough because there was no way Mo Bei would ever accept his feelings. He had wanted it to be enough, and when Mo Bei asked for his help after Zhang Ning visit, he felt so happy and wanted, he made sure that he could help him as much as he could.

Everything he said about helping him then and beyond was true, he endured all the pain and offenses from the chief because he didn’t want to distract him and because he was getting useful information for him to overthrow his uncle. He was desperate but his hope to see Mo Bei thanking him was enough for him to endure, until he heard from his lips the word useless. That brough so many memories from the worst days with his mother, before she decided she didn’t want to keep living with her son that reminded her so much of her shitty husband that left her. She didn’t used useless but worthless and unwanted. The pain she inflicted back then was so much as the one Mo Bei made him feel, that was something he couldn’t endure, no more.

He knew enough about people to know that they would never change, no matter what they said, they would keep getting angry and frustrated and took everything out on him. The Mo Bei that was now all too quiet wasn’t proof of anything, he may be caring while the wound was fresh, but the moment it seems healed, he would be the same again. And he, who loved him, couldn’t take it anymore. Not when the other would never see he loved him, when the other would never try to cross the friends’ line. It wasn’t fair or healthy for him.

Still, he decided that, as the fool he was, he could give him a chance.

The next day he was, after what he felt like an eternity, discharged; he didn’t know if he had to fill any papers after wearing the clothes Mo Bei left him the day before. He was going to ask Mo Bei when he arrived, maybe it could be the perfect excuse for them to finally break the silence. However, his plans sank when the manager was the one who walked to his room, if he was smiling, he could feel it disappear for some seconds.

“Hey, everything is ready!” She said after hugging him. “So here’s the thing, Mo Bei couldn’t make it, but he sent a car with someone who will take you to his place where he had already taken your clothes and some stuff to. Stop, let me finish” she raised her hand to cover Shang Qinghua’s mouth when he was about to complain. “He told me he will be working so you won’t have to see him that much and you won’t get angry, he hired a helper who will cook for you and give everything you need, so you can rest.”

“Why do I have to go to his place?” He at last was freed to make the only question he had, which made his anger came back. He truly was a selfish prick; he didn’t change that.

“Because, clearly, you don’t know how to take care of yourself and, as how you put it, you don’t want nothing with him, so this is what we came up with.”

He was feeling something like bittersweet inside his thoughts. He was angry that they decided everything for him, even they checked everything for his discharge. He wanted to complain but the manager wasn’t listening, only being too easy going, so he would let them take him wherever they wanted and then he would yell at Mo Bei when he gets to see him.

But it didn’t happen in the next week.

The man hired to take care of him was like a butler, taking care of his meals, his meds, his laundry and dishes and everything he asked like when he wanted some snacks, which Mo Bei didn’t have in the house. He wasn’t like guarding some inmate, although he was too serious that never could make a conversation with him.

It wasn’t bad, nothing was except that he never got to see Mo Bei. He either went too early to work or came home too late, in both cases he was always sleeping, even when he decided to stay awake, the meds made him drowsy or the other went out without making any noise. He knew he was still living there because his helper had told him, and because from time-to-time, that man received a call from him to report how things were.

After that week, Shang Qinghua gathered the enough rage to fill his courage and sent a message to Mo Bei asking him to speak with him. The response didn’t come until late at night with the excuse he had things to do at the office, so he wasn’t going back that day. The next day was the same and the next. Of course he called the manager to tell on him.

“Is he avoiding you? But didn’t you tell him you were sick of him? You kinda asked for him to stay far away from you,” her answer froze him. It was true he said that, and he didn’t retract when they were together the next day, back then he was supposed to be the one ignoring him.

“Then why he makes promises things he won’t fulfill? He said he would take care of me, and I hadn’t seen him.” He knew he was being pitiful and childish, but those were his true feelings.

“He paid someone to take care of you, for the same reason.”

“Ugh fine, I don’t think so but say that you’re right. How can I talk to him if he doesn’t let me? I’m feeling like a prisoner.” She couldn’t get away with that.

“Why? Did you tried to leave, and they didn’t let you?”

“…” He hadn’t tried it, he only assumed it.

“Look, I’ll talk to him, I’ll tell him you want to talk to him, but!” The manager almost yelled that “but”. “You have to promise me you will be honest with him, if you genuinely want to leave, say so and give real reasons, don’t blame him anymore because I think he had paid enough for his mistake, you may not see it, but everyone does. You have the rest of this day and, probably, the next one to find your true feelings, I bet he will do the same. OK?”

“I’ll tr… do it, I’ll do it.” When he was about to say “try”, he heard the manager clear her throat in an obvious attempt.

After that call, he wasn’t feeling confident anymore about that postponed talk. He was scared of it because he couldn’t foresee how it will go. Before he wanted to yell at him, he was still angry, so he wanted to tell him he was going back to his own place and never come back nor see him again, he had a plan to where to look for a new job and maybe rent a new place, disappear.

And now, after calming down, he was confused. After their fight, he felt awful and thought it was because the hurtful words, until he caught himself weeping in the shower and missing Mo Bei, that was when he came out the bathroom with his hair wet and went to bed without drying it or covering himself, which led him to the sickness. And this week without seeing him, although they lived in the same place, he felt lonely and the longing was stronger, almost unbearable.

He wanted to know if everything he said was true or excuses to be forgiven. He was willing to try and accept him as a friend if he wanted to use that label, he was sure that nothing more could be achieved but maybe that was enough if he were to change as he had said. He didn’t want to part with him without finding those answers.

Through the day, the anxiousness increased to the point that he couldn’t find anything to distract him enough. He walked in and out his room, even the helper stopped asking if he needed something every time he got out. In one of those times, he finally made the helper talk about how he was hired.

Turns out he was part of a company of butlers. They were inspired in United Kingdom butlers of the past, however they, too, followed former Chinese servants’ practice. Every candidate had to study in some kind of college to learn how to do it and then, they took an exam to become a true butler. The company was private, and only the rich and renowned people had the access to their services, which answered Shang Qinghua’s question about how Mo Bei knew about it.

“I think I should go to try my luck working there,” said Shang Qinghua after listening to some of the common activities and obligations they had, like having to live where their masters were, having to wake up before their masters and going to sleep after and be prepared for a request at any moment of their day. Luckily, they didn’t have to work with the same family all their lives and they could take vacations every year.

“I don’t think it’s for you, they always say before anyone enters to the butler’s school that only people who won’t miss or be missed by their family and social life are suited for it, and for the looks of it, seems you have people that truly cares about you.” He was being considerate, or so it seemed, because who in their right mind would think that a person who cared for you would be ignoring you while living in the same house? Or was it because his services were expensive, and someone hired him for someone else?

Because his thoughts went back to where he was trying to avoid, he didn’t make any more questions to him and walked back to his room. Only then he realized it was past six, so it wouldn’t be long before he arrived. Or so he thought because it was almost eleven until he finally came.

Shang Qinghua hid in his room, previously he left the door cracked open before he arrived, now he was hearing through it how Mo Bei made a small talk with the butler, then sending him off to who knows where, because he couldn’t listen everything clearly. After that, he awaited. He was wondering if Mo Bei would go to see him, or he would wait until he came out.

Of course it was the latter. For like ten minutes, Shang Qinghua gathered enough courage to come out. He found Mo Bei sitting at the dining table, with his back towards him, and looking like he was drinking cold tea because the stove or the microwave weren’t used. He approached with insecure steps until he was two steps behind Mo Bei, at that distance he saw the row of painkiller meds, it wasn’t hard to identify those were for headaches. He felt a pang of remorse, it was clear his head was hurting him a lot for the posture in which he held his forehead with his hand and, probably, he had his eyes closed.

“So? What did you want to talk about?” Mo Bei asked with an exhausted voice, Shang Qinghua was close to tell him to go to rest, but he made a promise to the manager, and it would be unfair to have all his tantrum and not putting an end to it.

“When can I go home?” All the starts he had planned to his conversation were thrown to the garbage, his mind went blank with the other’s question and that one was the only one he was able to remember, which was one of the less liked as first option.

“The doctor said you need two weeks of rest, after that is up to you what you decide to do.” He wasn’t being rude, only honest with his reply, which kept making him feel worse, along with the disappointment because the response didn’t take the conversation to where he wanted.

“What you said that day… was it true?”  He opted to be direct, overcoming his embarrassment and fear. A part of him wanted to finish as quickly as possible, the other one wanted it to last longer, as if he was accepting a possible goodbye.

“I have never lied to you.”

“That’s…” Shang Qinghua tried to think about any situation when he had lied to him, although he almost reviewed since their first meeting till the last one, he couldn’t find any, “… true.” Silence filled the room, both of them in the same position in which they started, without facing each other and not feeling the need to. Shang Qinghua noticed he wasn’t as scared as he thought he would be with Mo Bei’s answer, he was feeling a bit confused only. “Why me? I’m a coward, pathetic, asocial and useless guy, you could find anyone better…”

He could swear that when he used the word useless, Mo Bei’s shoulders shrunk even more, as if he were about to press his face in the table. However, after his last words, he sighed and stood up to finally look at him. Or he supposed because he wasn’t feeling confident enough look at him in the eyes.

“The flaws and strengths you see in yourself differ completely from what I see, because you tend to self-depreciate yourself, and I won’t inquire why, though I’d want to know.” He wasn’t sure if Mo Bei was watching him while speaking, he wasn’t as those people who were able to feel other eyes over them. Either way, he was too focused in the way his heart started to beat since Mo Bei stood up, and trying to guess what the other was going to say. “You’re not a coward, I’ve seen you face the worst situations without running away, you only dislike contradicting people. You’re not pathetic, I’ve seen you plan, think and scheme and the result being fruitful. You might be afraid to get close to people, to trust them, but in that matter you and I are not different.”

For the next part, because Mo Bei took longer to keep talking, Shang Qinghua rose his eyes a bit, noticing the grimace. “You’re one of the most hardworking persons I had ever met, even if you hate your job, you’re tired or uninterested, you give your all; you know how to help others, although you clearly don’t care too much about yourself. You’re far too much than what you think you are worth.”

Once again, he couldn’t face him. What he was saying made no sense, he wasn’t as awesome as he made it look like, even if he knew very well his self-loathing tendencies.

“You could get whoever you wanted, there surely are people a lot better than me, even with all the things you think about me, but here you’re, treating me as if I’m someone special. Everybody has been telling me this last days about how lucky I am for having someone taking care of me with so much devotion and I can’t stop wondering why. Why you want me at you side? Why every time we part, you come back? Why you are so nice to me?”

Ever since he started to feel things towards Mo Bei, he felt that he couldn’t control his tears as well as before. He wasn’t a crybaby until he met him, which made him thought that maybe being with him was too hurtful for him, and then he discovered that it was worse when he wasn’t. Now he was barely able to keep the tears inside his eyes.

“I don’t know it either…” when Mo Bei began to talk, his phone rang but he ignored it. “I just know it’s you who I need, who I want with me.” After the phone stopped ringing, it started again, the owner ignored it once more and Shang Qinghua was more focused in his tears and the weird feelings inside himself. “But I won’t force you, if you want to still go, then go; if you want to stay, stay.”

The next phone that interrupted their deep conversation was Shang Qinghua’s. It was weird if it rang first Mo Bei’s and then his, so it must be important. He pulled it out and turned his back towards Mo Bei, the manager was the one trying to contact them so he answered thinking it might me something urgent for her to be so insistent.

“Finally,” was the first thing she said. “Have you told him you love him already?”

“Not yet.” The same answer came from two different voices and intonations. One was exasperated, angry because their moment was interrupted, and the other was resigned that almost ended with a sigh.

“Ooooooh.” That sound didn’t come from one voice, it was made by men and woman, who knows how many. “Then I’ll call back, but could you hurry, virgins? We want to go home.”

The manager hung up before any of them could say anything else. “What? Are they still in the office? Was she with the others? Why would we be stopping them from going home? No, wait… what did she said and what did I said? I can’t remember or rather, I don’t want to remember. She’s been enjoying herself quite a bit since this began, doesn’t she? Why does…” His rambling could have lasted longer, he was too embarrassed to think in what he had answered and heard, he was distracting himself with the manager until a pair of strong arms surrounded him from behind, silencing him instantly.

He was too afraid to turn around, and Mo Bei wasn’t making him, so he decided to talk first. “Since I met you, I’ve been using all the existing synonyms of ‘impossible’. Because meeting you when you were stabbed was infeasible, having someone dropping you and me in my place so I take care of you was unreasonable, feeling kind of comfortable with a stranger at my house was unimaginable, having you suddenly gone without words and me missing you was implausible, you coming back to ask for my help was unthinkable, we working fine for that long and me enjoying it was beyond my wildest imagination, you asking for my advice with something as important as your family business was inconceivable, me being able to really do something useful to get back your birthright was a hundred-to-one possibility, and you going back again to find me was way out of every prediction I made, you asking me to stay with you through all my flaws is preposterous… You loving me back is… is… just…”

“Possible.” When none other word could leave his mouth, Mo Bei was the one who finished his idea, although it was the opposite of what he was thinking. Now his tears couldn’t be contained, he started sobbing as if he had received the worst of the news, even if his heart rather than feeling hurt, was feeling light and warm. He was scared of clinging to that emotion, it’s been years since he had felt that way, he barely felt it when Mo Bei came back to his life after all the shock was over, but right that moment, it was an intense feeling, too strong to ignore, and too real to think it could end at any given time.

“All this time I’d had this wild thought that everything that had happened was some vivid dream or a hallucination I’m having while slowly dying in my apartment after electrocuting myself when my instant noodles were accidentally spilled over the plug of my computer. That when people find me will be because the stench of my rotten body will bother my neighbors, so they’ll make the landlord enter or when my landlord get tired of me who doesn’t answer his messages and calls to demand my overdue rent.”

“Seriously? I don’t know if you’re an idiot or your imagination is too big.” When saying that, Mo Bei finally made him turn around, the surprise erased Shang Qinghua’s pout when Mo Bei kissed him.

Chapter Text

At first, the kiss was clumsy, making Shang Qinghua assume that Mo Bei maybe had too much time without kissing another person, sure that his experience came from kissing women, but he knew how to help him a bit. Shang Qinghua was the one who take the initiative after the previous shock, he made the other open his lips with a soft bite in his lower lip and entered his mouth with his tongue only to pull out Mo Bei’s tongue into his mouth and leading him on how to take control.

So it was until he remembered something that made him separated from the kiss, apart from the fact that he was in the need of some air. “Wait… the manager said virgins… have you not kissed no one before?”

“Does it matter?” Mo Bei tried to go back to the kissing, until the smaller man covered his mouth with two finders and looked at him with the interrogation in his eyes. “Fine, I haven’t, I wasn’t interested in all of them who just wanted my face and my name, and in fact I wasn’t interested in relationships at all.”

“No way!” To prevent him from saying anything more, Mo Bei restarted the kiss, this time successfully because the other was too bewildered to react on time. Although inexperienced, he was learning fast, making the kiss more and more passionate, using both his teeth in the other’s lips and his tongue in a less shy manner. Shang Qinghua hadn’t been breathless with a kiss in like forever, always feeling like it wasn’t enough. “Wait, wait, wait… have you had sex?”

“I’m not gonna have sex with you, not while your body is nothing more than skin and bones, your ass will be too pointy” with his response, Shang QInghua raised both of his arms to cover Mo Bei’s mouth, that statement didn’t make him feel embarrassed, of course he wanted to have sex with him, actually since the day they met. And he was right that right now he was too thin. Although he knew how to have sex without hurting Mo Bei with his boney ass, he found his own body hideous the way it was. However, his question wasn’t because of that!

“I was simply curious if you had the experience in that, there’s people who have sex with others without the loving part and those who doesn’t let other kiss them even while having sex, that’s all I wanted to know! I’ve waited like almost four years; I can wait longer.” With that, their kiss resumed. This time both clumsily walked to the couch where Shang Qinhgua made him lay, so he could be touchier with Mo Bei’s body. He had earnt the right, even if he won’t take it further than just feeling his perfect body.

“Now you wait,” in the middle of the kiss and Shang Qinghua’s hands touching his hot abs, Mo Bei was the one who broke the kiss, and the mood, for all that matters. “You have had sex, haven’t you? And you’re too good at kissing to be the pathetic friendless man you said you are.”

“Aaww do you think I’m good?” His intention to change the topic was halted with Mo Bei’s stern look. “Fine… I had had sex, a bit I guess, but let’s not talk about it now? I’ll talk about it when the time comes hahaha….”

With his nervous laugh, Mo Bei understood it wasn’t an important matter for the moment, they still had things they should tell each other, and they would have plenty of time after that to talk.

After some hot minutes of kissing, they were interrupted once more. The manager made a videocall they couldn’t ignore any longer. That made them know that she wasn’t at the office but at some bar with the rest of her crew, they easily guess the mood between him and Mo Bei because with a quick glance, they raised their beer mugs and cheered with congratulatory words and claps. Surely the people around them were annoyed of how loud they were.

“Oh my god, I swear I though we wouldn’t see you together, never!” said one of the models, it was clear how drunk they were already. It was useless to try and hide it, they weren’t sure how they assumed what had happened, but at least they looked happy.

“You lost the bet! She and Lao Wang doubted about you and lost the bet!” the second one was the other model.

“Seriously, what a ride with both of you,” added the manager, putting down her mug after a long gulp. “We’ll let you keep enjoying the night, tomorrow you have the day off but not Sunday, do you hear?”

“Manager truly enjoyed our drama, right?” Shang Qinghua was the first one to talk after all the overflow of emotions.

“As I told Mo Bei yesterday, I was really worried about you two, both pinning for each other and hurting yourselves instead of seeing the things as how they were, but, as I told him too, I knew I could say I enjoyed it when you get together as now.” She was slurring her words a bit, although her expression was kind of honest and serious. “Enjoy yourselves, we’ll congratulate you properly on Sunday.”

With that, she finally let them be by themselves. The manager had helped them a lot, although some things she suggested were a bit too much for them, Mo Bei said so about her asking him to not meet Shang Qinghua after he was discharged until he asked by himself to talk. He was against the idea, but she was too persistent about it that he had to do it, and soon the work built up at the office, helping him stay away as much as possible from his own place.

That’s why that day he had a strong headache, he was really tired, but after all that happened, he was able to lift most of the pressure, feeling a bit more relaxed, although sleeping was still one of his needs. Therefore, they went to sleep, this time shyly together in the same bed, without any other intention than rest.  The next day they could talk about everything that was left.

When they woke up, Shang Qinghua was sprawled almost all over Mo Bei. He had his left arm on Mo Bei’s chest while his left leg was over his tights, his face too close to his chest. When Shang Qinghua noticed his messy position, he jumped to sit with his back straight, however, Mo Bei caught him before he could do anything and made him keep resting beside him.

“I never noticed before how messy you are while sleeping.” Mo Bei pointed out, making him pout.

“Well excuse me, but I had never slept in a bed this big, why would I let all this space go to waste?” he said pretending to be aggravated.

“Is not the other side completely empty?” It was true, they only occupied half of the bed, any excuse Shang Qinghua could make would be worthless to hide the fact that he hasn’t slept with anyone in years, so his loneliness made him clingy. “Not that I’m complaining, you work well as a blanket.” With that Mo Bei pulled him to stay completely on top of him, not that it was hard for someone so strong, although Shang Qinghua had to position himself carefully so his elbows, knees and any other protruding bone weren’t to hurt Mo Bei.

“I always considered my body cold, but now I see your is far colder.” He actually shuddered when half of his exposed skin was touching Mo Bei’s, it wasn’t that he felt like a corpse but even under the sheets, Mo Bei was still a bit colder than him.

“And luckily you’re too small to reach my feet but those and my hands are the coldest in the night and early dawn,” while speaking, Mo Bei placed his hand under Shang Qinghua’s shirt to let him feel his hand. It certainly was colder than the rest of his body, so much that he almost hissed. “I’m telling you, right now is warmer that late at night.”

“Another point given to my small size,” Shang Qinghua chuckled, then felt silent. While watching Mo Bei’s eyes he was wondering, again, if everything was real. He had never had a peaceful awakening like that, it was something he only saw in his dreams and movies, something that always thought unconnected to him. It was never a need, because he knew he wouldn’t get it by only wishing for it. And now that he had it, or so it seemed, it was too surreal, he was afraid it would disappear at any given time or that it wouldn’t last long. He wanted to enjoy it, and, at the same time, he didn’t want to get used to it, to prepare himself if he were to lose it in the future.

“Hey, I’m here.” Mo Bei placed his hand on his head and made him get close so he could kiss him. Apparently, he was able to see the turmoil inside Shang Qinghua’s head, and as scary as it was, it felt right and not as bad.

“Sorry, I just… I just need to get used to it I guess…” he laughed nervously a bit, then he smiled with a more sincere expression before pulling himself up. “I’m hungry, let me make breakfast.”

“Breakfast is already done, our butler made it earlier.” With that, Mo Bei reminded him that the butler was hired for two weeks and that, although his priority was Shang Qinghua recovery, he was as much butler for Mo Bei as for him. Even so, his mind lingered more in the “our” than in “butler”. It kind of felt nice, and so out of his world.

With a smile, he rolled out of the bed, noticing that he was wearing Mo Bei’s upper part of his pajama, while the taller man wore the pants. It was a deep blue pajama made of a soft and fresh fabric, which made it extremely comfortable. Of course it was oversized in his small body, even all buttoned up, it kept sliding from one or the other shoulder, if not, leaving his chest almost half uncovered; at least it was long enough to cover his underwear perfectly.

Still, he was considering if it were fine to come out the room looking like that when the butler could see him. For the past days, out of decency, he had been using his shorts only to sleep, changing them every time he went out of his room for some old jeans. Not only because he felt shame of being looked like that (which was incredible because he never felt shame in his own place with Mo Bei, The Stranger), but because it wasn’t cool to be with the same clothes you slept with all day long. It wasn’t cool but he stopped caring about that since he began to live alone. Alone!

“He’s back to his room, if that’s what you’re wondering while lost into the pajama, because if you’re thinking that you had dirtied it, I swear I’ll…”

“No! Wait… you’ll what?” All the anxiousness because his angry tone, was washed away quickly by his own courage and desire to not be stepped on anymore, not by him. He wasn’t angry, per se, only genuinely curious because he was still trying to convince himself that maybe Mo Bei could change for the better.

“I’ll take it off from you and wear it all day,” he answered with a raised eyebrow. He knew what Shang Qinghua was thinking, so he wanted to know what he would say after discovering that he wasn’t threatening him as before.

“No pants?” Mo Bei threw at his face the pillow and rose up to walk outside the room.

“No pants, but you lost your chance, the offer has expired.”

He wasn’t sure if Mo Bei genuinely wanted to say that or if he was quick enough to notice and change it right away, but he wanted to believe in him, he was still trying to enjoy what was happening for it to end so fast.

They only needed to reheat the food, which Shang Qinghua offered to do while he asked about the butler’s room. Only the first days he saw him sleeping on the couch in the living room, after that he never noticed where he went, and he was sure that the huge apartment of Mo Bei only had two bedrooms, each with its bathroom, and a studio in the top floor, which was more than a half smaller than the low level, in which there was only the living room, the kitchen, another bathroom, the laundry room and a storage room. Either he was sleeping in the studio or the storage room.

“Of course not, what am I? A Tyrant?” When Mo Be asked, he immediately looked at Shang Qinghua with a warning in his eyes, same that the smaller man answered with a shrug. “He sleeps in the next apartment.”

“What? Did you pay the rent of a whole apartment only for him to sleep? Because he was always here taking care of me.”

“Nah, I bought it.”

“…” Shang QInghua forgot about the food he was serving to turn around and watch him full of incredulity, waiting for him to say that it was a joke, that he only was paying rent. “You damned rich child! Are you crazy? Why would you have to buy it if you already have this enormous place?”

“Actually it’s smaller and cheaper, for a bit.” His justification wasn’t enough. “Truth to be told, I didn’t buy it for him but for you, it was some kind of countermeasure if you didn’t want to stay here and lose you independence, you could live there on your own. I wouldn’t allow it but if you were too stubborn, I would let you to pay for it.”

And that was sweet? Could it be considered sweet and not mental because he didn’t want him being too far away? No, it definitely was sweet now that he had told him he loved him… Although the words literally hadn’t been said by none of them, only said by another person and never denied by them. Either way, he buying an apartment for him was too much and too good, yet, he preferred living in the one they were already in. If possible.

“Can I see it?” he finally asked, placing the served dishes on the table, Mo Bei snorted and took out his phone to text something really fast.

“Sure, I told him we’ll gonna enter the apartment when he is out doing the groceries.”

While having breakfast, Shang Qinghua finally asked about how things were going at the company. He still wasn’t sure if he would be able to keep helping him; yet, he was curious and wanted the uncle to be dethroned.

Mo Bei told him how more than half of the board members wanted him rather than his uncle, his support was getting bigger although his uncle wasn’t backing away, still showing his own achievements while trying to make Mo Bei flounder and lose that support. Now Mo Bei had lawyers kind of trusty that were helping him with all the matters he couldn’t understand and needed their legal approval.

“And your family? Have they contacted you?” That was one of the things Shang Qinghua was more curious about, he felt worried for Mo Bei having to confront them and kind of excited if he showed his determination.

“Yes, I went to the house two days ago… It was a mess, they yelled, and I yelled but, in the end, I took back the bank account my parents gave me.” Mo Bei was almost over with his food; however, he was looking at it while using his chopsticks to mess with it. He still was so bothered by whatever his family told him that he was playing with his food. Such rudeness for someone that well educated. “At least they know I’m doing better changes to the company that their second son, so they can’t be that rude.”

That only met that at least they left him enter the house and went through his things, with how stern Mo Bei had described his family to be, Shang Qinghua was almost sure that they wouldn’t let him get inside their house if he would refuse to leave his modeling job. Although it was impossible to them to argue outside where people would listen. Their face was more important than nothing, just as the old school.

Nonetheless, if they had let Mo Bei talk, or yell, was only because they truly recognized the effort he put into the company. “And what do you think? Will they let you run the company if you “win” this war against your uncle? Even after knowing you won’t leave the other job?”

“I think so, they had argued with my uncle because his methods, but they can’t do nothing, though, and because the company is the family heirloom and pride, they may prefer have someone like me running it that someone like him.” There was true disgust in his voice every time he mentioned his uncle, more than the one Shang Qinghua noticed from before.

“I guess they’re waiting for real results from my side, before making a decision about who they’ll support.” Since the beginning, Shang Qinghua has considered that as a decisive point: Mo Bei’s results and changes being far more fruitful than his uncle’s. He had heard some of Mo Bei’s ideas from before and from now, and were good but those were projects or ideas, he needed for it to be done and successful to show them how good he was.

And soon, that thought led him to an idea. Mo Bei’s biggest project, in which he had almost all his attention, aside from his weak assistant, was the manufacturing of cheaper but not low-quality systems. His uncle, since he took control, had surely risen the quality of their products at the cost of making them more expensive, which was the same or fine for bigger companies as five-stars hotels or offices buildings from rich owners, but because of that they were losing sales coming from the people who wanted an air conditioning in their normal homes.

Before his uncle, those costumers were not a priority, but neither were neglected. Their systems had always been a bit expensive, known by people above the middle class, that’s why his company was not one of the more renowned for people like Shang Qinghua, or even some less poor. So Mo Bei wanted to make those more common air conditioners and expand their sales and costumers’ range, he had already ask for help in the manufactures division to made the prototypes and everything about the cost, so now he just needed someone who could sold those systems to approve that the rest of the population could or would like to buy them.

And that’s where Shang Qinghua knew how to help both Mo Bei’s project and to show off how he being a model wasn’t just a useless and shameful thing. If he got to made it possible, then it would be Shang Qinghua’s time to pay back that time when Mo Bei came to his place to surprise him, like when he made other people tell him he would be his beloved Mobei-Jun’s voice.

Chapter Text

They didn’t become a lovely couple from one day to the next, both of them made their best efforts trying to break down the invisible walls each of them built. One while trying to not see his own feelings and the other while trying to maintain their boss and assistant relationship while thinking that nothing else could be achieved.

That’s why their Saturday was a lazy movie day in which Mo Bei showed one of his mother’s movies. Aside of that, none of them dared to get into more personal matters if the other wasn’t willing to talk about it. Not that Shang Qinghua wasn’t willing, it was that telling about himself was totally a mood killer and kind of embarrassing, he was even scared that maybe Mo Bei will throw him out if he tells him how he survived those seven months after graduation.

Because of that he kept telling himself that it was best to wait until his second week of resting was over. Mo Bei could hate him or feel disgusted by him but if he were the promise keeper he seemed to be, he knew that it would be awkward for both of them to stay in the same place until the set time was over.

Thinking, too, in not making things harder, he never asked to Mo Bei to stop and talk about what their official title was. It was pretty obvious that they weren’t friends because friends didn’t kiss nor sleep together in the same bed. However, that night when they kissed, none of them say clearly about liking or loving the other, so he wanted to keep that doubt and nameless relationship between them until Mo Bei heard about his past deeds. Not that he had murdered someone or stole anything, it wasn’t a crime per se, although could be seen as it or as something to be hated for.

With that in mind, he focused entirely in helping Mo Bei, not because he wanted to make some extra points about being useful, only because he knew how to help. And so was telling himself to keep his mind at ease and let all his anxiousness at the back of his mind for later.

By himself he looked for the contact info he needed from the people he wanted Mo Bei to make the deal with. Some were already acquaintances from Mo Bei’s modelling job, which meant they already know him and, probably, wouldn’t refuse meeting with Shang Qinghua to hear about his boss’ project. Once he had the four men interest, he called Zhang Ning and explained his plan to keep everything from telling Mo Bei until the last moment, which he excitedly accepted and sent his assistant to all the meetings Shang Qinghua had with the representatives of the companies he was contacting.

All of it took two weeks until the day to tell Mo Bei came. With Zhang Ning’s guide and suggestions, Shang Qinghua reserved a private salon in some famous and expensive restaurant for the “introductory” meeting. At first, he was almost certain and decided to not go, however Zhang Ning and his assistant convinced him that it was important for him to be there.

To Mo Bei, Zhang Ning was the one who told him that the people they would be meeting were interested in a partnership with the company; by only the name, Mo Bei could only tell they wanted to sell their existent systems because there was no way that no one from outside knew about the new ones. So, a day before the dinner, Mo Bei told Shang Qinghua that he won’t be arriving to dinner the next day, Shang Qinghua had to do a huge effort to hide his grin and excitement.

At the restaurant, Zhang Ning’s assistant was the one who received the four future business partners while assuring them that Shang Qinghua would arrive shortly so they should begin. Normally, they would take dinner while making idle talk, leaving the business matters till the last part, however this time they did it before the main dishes were ordered.

“Excuse us for being blunt and impatient, we’ll order after this,” said one of the men while taking out some papers from his briefcase, the same the other three did and handed over towards Mo Bei, who was surprised but accepted, nonetheless.

“We’ve been talking to your assistant about all this project of yours and we’re really interested in having your products on our stores, we just need to discuss about prices, quantity of the order we can make, and some issues we only can talk with you, these are our conditions for you to review.” While the other one was talking, Mo Bei overlooked the papers to find out what they were exactly talking about.

Big was his surprise when he read the name of the air conditionings that were part of his biggest project, which made him wonder who that assistant was until Shang Qinghua arrived and took the seat at his left side. Shang Qinghua was feeling nervous and a bit jumpy, he seated with a shy smile on his face and almost trembled when he caught Mo Bei’s eyes.

“What an amazing assistant you have, that we four, being competitors in the same market dinning with our shared future business partner is quite incredible.” Another of the men talked when the couple had already exchanged their mute words through their glances, which made them turn and focus on them again. “He spoke highly of you, and I bet you talk highly of him too, if not, you should.”

“Yeah, he’s great.” Mo Bei comment made Shang Qinghua blush, which made the rest laugh, then they talk a bit about the business while the dishes came.

The dinner ended around ten, they set a date for their formal meetings to finish the contract. The mood between them was serious but pleasant, some asked why Mo Bei had decided to try the modeling job while having a big company as a legacy, others were curious as why he hadn’t contacted them before, and even joked around asking Shang Qinghua to go to work for them, which rose Mo Bei’s coldness for some seconds until he was the one saying that they couldn’t afford him.

After all that, Zhang Ning gave them a lift to Mo Bei’s place. They had just closed the door when Mo Bei was all over him, kissing his mouth and his neck. Shang Qinghua let him take the lead, humming in surprise, still with his mouth connected to his, when Mo Bei carried him from his tights, making him surround Mo Bei’s waist with his legs.

Every action and kiss were becoming more and more desperate than the previous one. At some point Mo Bei took him to his bedroom. It was until he was placed over the bed, when he made his mind come back to what was happening or may happen.

“Waitwaitwaitwaitwait!” With strength and decency he never thought he had, he pushed Mo Bei up from him. In the beginning he let out and exasperated growl, before looking at him with confusion. “I’m not ready for this…” He was afraid that he could misunderstand the situation, or that Mo Bei wasn’t going beyond the kisses, however, his conscience about the thing he hadn’t told Mo Bei made him prefer killing the mood than let everything keep going.

“Why? You have gained weight, at least a bit, want to shower first?”

“No, I mean yes, but not that, wait…” From his messy words, Mo Bei was about to take him to the bathroom, so he had to stop him again. “I mean I’m not ready… I want it too but not yet?” He didn’t know how to tell without telling all, he never had thought before that THAT time was close, so he never considered nothing besides that he had to have a serious talk with Mo Bei.

Now wasn’t the moment, Mo Bei needed to focus entirely on the new contracts to bring to life the things he had wanted since coming back to his father’s company. Telling him about himself would only made things harder for them, and if he was to be despised, it was better when his new business partners had already sign.

It was better to bear Mo Bei’s fast disappointed expression than having him get upset in an important day as that. He just made the mental note that he had to tell him sooner than later, this week or the next one but not wait more than that because the pain of being rejected would be too much for him if he had to fall deeper for the new Mo Bei.

Fortunately, Mo Bei agreed without making any rude comment or questioning his reasons. So relieving and painful at the same time.

The rest of the week had both of them busy, Mo Bei more than him, with the new contracts and systems to make. Which didn’t allow Shang Qinghua to speak with Mo Bei about the issue. As more time went by, he felt more anxious and afraid to say it, he knew he should have done it in whatever situation because the other deserved to know, however this was an important and decisive moment in Mo Bei’s life, only when things were more secure for him would be a better time to talk.

If it weren’t because the work was taking the most of their time, he would feel even more guilty when Mo Bei treated him kindly and, even, lovingly. He thought that when the contracts were signed and the orders made, they would be a bit more relaxed, however one Sunday his plans were blown off when Mo Bei received a call from his family.

The manager and him were a bit far from him, they couldn’t hear what he was saying and only watch his expressions full of disgust and repressed anger, even one time he rolled his eyes to whatever they were saying, something none of them had seen him do before.

The call was, as he explained to them, because his family was preparing a banquet for the company partners and sponsors or friends. It wasn’t something that weird between the biggest, richest and famous companies in the country, almost considered a social and private affair for the most important people in the industries. He was guessing that probably his family and the board members had come to a decision, and it would be announced there, which obligated Mo Bei to go although he hated so much those events.

With that new excuse, it was even more difficult for Shang Qinghua to focus on anything different.

It was on the day previous to the banquet that Rong Qianhui, Zhang Ning’s assistant, asked him to meet him at his office so he could prepare him for what the banquet would be for them, the assistants, because Mo Bei asked him to accompany him if he wanted, but he could only agree or disagree after Rong Qianhui’s explanation.

Because the main reason for an opulent banquet like that was for business, if they wanted, they could go with an assistant, secretary or anyone who would be in charge to assist them. However, the origin of those banquets was too old, which meant that they kept some old traditions that nowadays weren’t seen as good and proper as before. Like how them, as the assistants, have to be behind their bosses, not too far nor too close so they could hear every conversation with everybody, with the whole reason that they should remember everything if their bosses were to forget something in the future. Of course if the boss asks for it, they could step aside and don’t hear.

They should carry on themselves their bosses’ business cards to give the people they meet and their bosses’ pen if they need to sign or write something; carry the business cards the others give their boss and move to whenever the boss goes. Which mean, as Rong Qianhui advised him, they shouldn’t drink, not even water, so the use of the restroom wasn’t frequent.

They should be silent all the time, unless their bosses’ ask for them to talk, held their head highs without being too cocky for others and be prepared for anything their bosses may need. And, lastly, while their bosses will be eating in the main dining room with the rest, they would be seated in a different room, because business talk was forbidden while eating.

That was one of the worst parts of those banquets, that while they were only assistants, they had some of the highest statuses in their company, thus being treated as mere servants as in the old times, was offensive for many. The rest learnt how to ignore the treatment, because they still will be given food and only follow their bosses’ instructions. However, it was said that while Mo Bei’s father’s and Zhang Ning’s generation, weren’t passionate anymore about those banquets, it would be Mo Bei’s generation who would be changing that old fashioned tradition, so the next generation had something completely new and less snobbinsh.

Meanwhile, Rong Qianhui made sure that Shang Qinghua decided if he would be fine in a banquet like that. Once he accepted, he took him to buy a new and expensive suit for the night, and not only the suit but the belt, shoes, socks, shirt and tie. His suit was dark blue, a bit brighter than the ones Mo Bei had, a white shirt and a pale blue tie.

When he got home with Mo Bei, he asked the same about being sure that he wasn’t bothered by their treatment towards the assistants and if he really wanted to go.

“Of course I want,” he answered after hanging his new suit on the back of his bedroom’s door. “You know I like new experiences; I want to have something to criticize and write about later. I’ll be good, I’ll promise.”

“I know you’ll be but some of those people are beasts and look for others in who to step on, so don’t leave my side, ok?”

“I’ll do, don’t worry.” Mo Bei kissed him in his forehead before going to the kitchen to prepare their dinner, that day it was his turn.

They arrived at the banquet in Zhang Ning’s car, Rong Qianhui was driving while Shang Qinghua occupied the next seat, and their bosses were sitting in the back. The old social manners they wanted had to be done from even their car.

Once in the luxurious building that was where Mo Bei had grown up, Shang Qinghua kept in mind all the advises given so he never lost from his sight Mo Bei’s back, even when he was curious to stare at the whole place because as the poor guy he was, he had never seen a place like that, only in the movies.

He never left Mo Bei’s side, his memory was enough to memorize people’s and companies’ names, even their posts and the few businesses they were interested to do with Mo Bei’s company, although more than a half was only introducing themselves with him. He still wrote everything down whenever was the opportunity, though, so his memories didn’t tangle or get lost if something more important were to be said.

He was already feeling annoyed, but at how most of the people approached Mo Bei as if they knew a lot more than him, maybe many knew more, and wanted to mentor him. All of them were too full of themselves, some going to the point to tell him what he should do or have done for the company, to which Mo Bei never agreed or disagreed, only saying “I see” and changing the topic, neither thanking them for their unsolicited advises.

Nevertheless, those weren’t the worse treats he saw there. Shang Qinghua knew that amongst the lower class were a lot of trashy people, but between those highly educated and presumptuous bastards were some that were harassing some of the female assistants every time they walked past them, pinching them in their buttocks or “accidentally” getting too close to them with dumb excuses as if there wasn’t enough space for them to walk farther.

Mo Bei told him how it was a snobbish and sexist environment. While male assistants and dull looking female assistants were ignored or seen as some low life, the number of businesswomen was reduced to five, or five was the most Shang Qinghua spotted, and if it wasn’t for them taking the initiative to approach the rest of the men to talk about business, none of the men did it by themselves. He was never close enough to any of them to know how the other were looking or speaking with them, however, it was pretty obvious it wasn’t full or respect.

Either way, Shang QInghua was only waiting for the moment the dinner was served, although he never asked Rong Qianhui at what time it was. Not that he was hungry, it was that anything was better than keep seeing the rich bastards and their boastful personalities.

“Come, let’s go to the restroom,” Mo Bei told him while walking to the opposite side in which Shang Qinghua deducted before the restroom was. Through the time there, he had seen many of the guests whisper a question to the waiters and they always pointed at the same place every time, so he considered that was the restroom.

And he wasn’t wrong, Mo Bei led him towards one room not far from the main hall which seemed to be some kind of office without owner, more like a business room? Who knows, he didn’t have the vocabulary for all the rooms a house as big as that could have. But now he knew in what he would waste one free afternoon.

“I’m so exhausted, I hate these events.” Mo Bei got close to him and rested his forehead in Shang Qinghua’s head. If he weren’t that short, they probably would have their foreheads touching.

“There, there, you’ve done great,” Shang Qinghua rubbed his back, which made the taller man sigh. “Is the time to eat getting closer? Do you think they’ll give us good food or packaged food?” He felt Mo Bei’s breath move his hair when he laughed softly.

“One more hour, and after it we can’t leave yet. But I guess the food served to you and the rest won’t be that bad, at least better than instant noodles.” Mo Bei rose his head to look at him.

“Excuse my poverty, you great oh lord that only eats Matsutakes for dinner.” Shang Qinghua hit him softly in the chest while pouting, making the other laugh and steal a kiss from him.

“Let’s go back in five minutes, I can’t hide for too long.” They occupied the same individual couch while criticizing for some minutes everything they hated the most until they had to go back and keep the boss and assistant mask.

Chapter Text

Dinner time didn’t come as faster as Shang Qinghua wanted, still, it was a good moment to take a break for all the assistants. The moment the last of the bosses entered the dinner hall, the tension and stiffness of the assistants was lifted, little by little they gathered together to talk with the ones they knew already, like Rong Qianhui that went to meet Shang Qinghua almost in the first second their bosses were gone.

Zhang Ning’s assistant had been worried about him since they got separated after arriving to the place, so now he was able to question the younger assistant about his impression and if it was too hard for him. Fortunately, having to be Mo Bei’s shadow wasn’t as hard as if must be for Mo Bei who had to be the one making the talks, aside of all the things he hated of the snob bastards and how tired he was feeling already for standing for more than two hours, he wasn’t fed up yet.

Their meal, as Mo Bei had warned him, wasn’t as fancy as the dishes served to their bosses, not that it mattered to Shang Qinghua because he barely found appetizing those kinds of meals. All the dishes were common Chinese cuisine, although surely, they used the best of the ingredients, and it was served in a buffet style so they could serve themselves. Either way he wasn’t that desperate for food, so he only tried two different dishes.

While they were eating, Rong Qinahui was close to him, but he was distracted by other assistants that knew him and wanted to talk. Some tried to speak with Shang Winghua, because who he was assistant of, however he didn’t want to gossip against no one, not even Mo Bei’s uncle who he hated so much, so they lost interest quickly with his constants “I don’t know”.

After the dinner, like almost two hours later, the bosses walked back to the main hall to talk, and their assistant went back to be their shadows. Not long after, over the balcony at the end of the double stairs in the hall, Mo Bei’s grandfather and some of the board members drew the attention of all those present. Mo Bei’s uncle and Zhang Ning were standing on the landings of each stair.

“Thank you all for coming today, as you know, we have an important announcement to do.” Thanks to how tall the hall was and that all inside were quiet, Mo Bei’s grandfather’s raspy and deep voice was easily heard. Shang Qinghua felt his heart racing, as if he were about to hear some test results and not someone else’s. “My grandson, Mo Bei, will be taking over the company, through this last months he had demonstrated be up to the post, although he’s still inexperienced in many things, and Zhang Ning and Mo Linguang will be still helping him.”

With that, he raised a glass towards Mo Bei, to which he answered with bowing his head slightly. The people around started clapping and, softly, cheering, it was what everyone knew they come for, and now that it was official, they could get close to him with their true intentions, which made things harder for Shang Qinghua that was constantly pushed away so the people could surround Mo Bei. He had to put up with elbows hitting his ribs, shoulders from right to left squeezing him and some painful stomps in his feet.

The chaos ended, or Mo Bei managed to run away for some seconds, after another hour! Shang Qinghua leant on the closest wall while massaging his ribs and his face because someone had accidentally hit him in the jaw, or he wanted to think it was accidentally.

“It was like boarding the bus at the office workers’ departure time.” He groaned after using his tongue to see if the skin inside his mouth wasn’t broken because the hit. “Seriously, I’m amazed how they never pushed you.”

“Because they controlled themselves when they reach me, I guess.” Mo Bei fixed his hair, then he made him raise his head so he could look at the place where he was hurt, apart for the dim red mark, it hadn’t swollen. “Go to rest, most of the people is leaving already, it’s not that necessary for you to be around.”

Mo Bei gave him instructions to follow the hallway and turn at the left almost at the end to reach the west hall of the house, upstairs he was supposed to find some couches in the balcony at the end of the stairs, there is where he should wait until Mo Bei was over biding farewell for the rest of the guests, although it wasn’t his job.

“What if someone see me and thinks I’m lost, or that and suspiciously trying to steal something?” He was too afraid to walk alone in that huge house, he was sure he could easily get lost, or even murdered if he were someone important or living in a crime story.

“Tell them I sent you there, they may call me or you call me so I can reprimand them for doubting you, either way it won’t take more than ten minutes before I’m with you.” Because they were not far from the main hall, none of them could do anything else besides smiling to each other before parting.

Shang Qinghua wasn’t sure if he should pretend confidence or let his nervousness to take control of his body. With whichever option, the person who find him would think he was plotting something for being in a place with the lights turned off, because it was obvious he couldn’t find the switch as if in a normal house. It was fortunate enough that the windows were so big that the light from the moon outside allowed him to know to where he was going.

The west hall was the half in size with the main one, it had a big living room in the center and tables around with flowers in expensive vases. If the curtains were closed, he would have misstep at some point already and broken one of those things. He walked with his arms fold towards his body, to prevent touching anything accidentally. He felt as nervous as when he walked in the glassware aisle in the supermarket.

The moment he reached the stairs, he climbed as fast as he could to let his breath out again after holding it since he entered the place, almost. The place Mo Bei described was like a little lounge with fancy furniture, he sat in one of the armchairs with his back straight and his hands over his lap, when he took out his cellphone, after so many hours without doing it, he found it was almost midnight. Now he understood why he felt so tired and sleepy, apart from the energy he had to waste trying to not be squeezed to death.

He was about to distract himself with his social media when he heard some steps coming close to where he was, when he rose his eyes, he saw a silhouette coming from the upper door of the hall, the light at the other side didn’t let him know who it was until he heard his voice.

“Little mouse, have you become a rat and now you’re trying to steal something from here?” Of course, it was de annoying voice of Mo Linguang, Mo Bei’s uncle.

“Can I steal this armchair by only sitting on it?” He asked, although he was even more imposing than Mo Bei, Shang Qinghua wasn’t scared of him, he only felt hate for all the things he had done to Mo Bei. It was obvious the man wasn’t expecting that kind of answer because he looked surprised when the light reached his face.

“I don’t know, you’re the one who knows how to steal, didn’t you do it a lot in the office?”

“That? I paid the price for the little information I could give your nephew, and you yourself said you didn’t have nothing to hide nor anything useful for him, remember?” He clearly remembered the conversation they had after his second week working there when he was called to his office where he told him that he knew he was working for Mo Bei, of course he denied it, saying that Mo Bei helped him get the job because being the assistant of a weekend’s model wouldn’t let him pay his bills. “Or you truly are a forgetful old man than even forgot he allowed one of his workers to mistreat a lowly accountant?”

“You vermin!” As fast as his temper flared up, it cooled down while looking to the sides as if he didn’t want to no one see him lose control. “I don’t have anything to do with it, you were only the unlucky bastard who made him lose his temper. You truly are annoying; I don’t blame him.”

“I won’t deny that, I’ve been told the same for many years, not even my mother wanted me,” he shrugged while resting his back in the armchair, letting his body feel comfortable. “But tell me, boss, did you need me or why are you here? Oh no wait, I only work for boss Mo Bei, mister, so I can’t do nothing if he doesn’t tell me first, talk to him if you want something.”

“You seem confident, but have you forgotten that I will be close to him? Anything can go wrong in his decisions, or something else.” The man remained standing, only walking towards the railing to lean on it.

“I know but at least Zhang Ning will be there, as for me, I’m not afraid.” Shang Qinghua crossed his arms over his chest. “I don’t have family to be threatened with, my mother surely would tell you she doesn’t know me and if you indebt her, she will made me pay, so it’s the same. Me dying or getting hurt? By all means, please do your worst, but Mo Bei will know who did it and will do what he did to your chief section. What else? Me having dirty business? Have you seen my house and what I own? I don’t have any luxury, so don’t make a fool of yourself with that approach.”

Once again, his writer/reader knowledge had helped him to see all the possible threats, although he was scared that he could be missing some more realistic ones, he was sure Mo Bei could help him if he asked, or even the manager if he was afraid to disturb Mo Bei’s fame and face. He was feeling a little confident with it, probably it would be different If anything would truly happen.

“Oh, a fearless rat, I see.” When Mo Linguang wasn’t amazed at all, he felt goosebumps, he felt cold coming from him, if that was even possible. “But how about this? What if I were to tell Mo Bei you’re a slut who had sleep with other men for money? I bet you haven’t talked about it with him, because otherwise it only means he’s paying you too and he’s getting laid with your used ass.”

And that hit him hard. All his calmness was broken, he instantly rose from his seat to watch him with and angry glare, even if his heart was racing at high-speed. He was trying to come up with ideas of how to make it sound as if he was lying, however when he turned around to face him, he showed him photos some of his “clients” had took without him noticing. All the color in his face drained, how it was that he never saw those until then?

“So, tell me. You have told him, right? If I show him this and you past account comments on your service, I’m sure he wouldn’t feel betrayed or disgusted, right Mo Bei?” With that, he turned around to the end of the stairs where Mo Bei was about to step in. Shang Qinghua felt like he was about to pass out when he noticed the surprised face in Mo Bei.

He was thinking in what to say, when a notification rang in Mo Bei’s phone, and he took it off to see it. Even at the high in which Shang Qinghua was, he saw it was what Mo Linguang had showed him some seconds ago. He really sent it to him!

“Wait, no, don’t see!” He shouted while trying to get down with him, however, Mo Bei watched him with rage and walked away! When he was about to get to the first step, a hand seized him by the collar of his jacket.

“So you didn’t have told him.” The entertained voice from the uncle made him go mad, he was too scared to face Mo Bei now, but he was angrier with the man for telling him that way. He turned around and tried to punch him, but Mo Linguang dodged it without even needing to release him, only catching his wrist to lower it with the other one. “Let me tell ask you something, rat, are you using my nephew’s money to leave poverty or he’s a homo like you? My parents would love to know that he’s with a whore like you.”

With that, Shang Qinghua stopped all his attempts to freed himself and stayed still, he knew the other was waiting that moment and reaction to threat him. Either he would like to use him against Mo Bei, to work undercover and sabotage Mo Bei’s decisions or to tell Mo Bei to do whatever his uncle said.

“You know you’re trash, right? Worse than rat shit.” He didn’t know why, suddenly his calmness came back to him while his mind cleared a bit. “Tell the world I’m a slut, tell your parents if you want, but I’ll say I did and pretended everything to get Mo Bei’s money and that he didn’t know nothing, I rather be seen as the shit I am than pretend I’m not, like you pretending to know how to manage a company when not even your parents want you there!”

That finally hit him where it hurt because he released Shang Qinghua’s wrist and punched him in the face so hard that it left him seeing black dots and feeling dizzy while blood started pouring from his nose along with a piercing pain. Shang Qinghua tried to stop the bleeding, however when he tried to cover his nostrils, the pain made him cease any intention. For some reason, he felt like laughing although his eyes were filled with tears.

“And now it’s pretty obvious why your subordinated abused a worker, the boss hits his people, have you all seen it?!” He spoke pretending someone was at the back of Mo Linguang, which made him turn around quickly, when he noticed it was all a farce, he punched again Shang, when he was trying to walk away.

He punched him once and less hard than the first time, so he was lucid enough to keep talking. “I bet your family knows about your bad temper, what would they say if they see you hurting some nobody like me? Isn’t it something improper for some well-bred like you be hitting people because they make you mad?” He knew it was dangerous to make him angrier than what he was in that moment.

Seeing his eyes almost turning red from rage, made him gave one step back, however Mo Linguang easily grabbed him from his tie and shirt and shortened the distance to start punching him without giving him a rest. “You useless rat, who cares what they think, they’re old and no one will know what happens to a trash like you!”

“Mo Linguang!” A group of footsteps came from the same door he had arrived, just what Shang Qinghua had been waiting in behalf his face. Both, the hitter and the victim, watched Mo Bei’s grandparents, Zhang Ning and his assistant and some servants and guests that walked behind them.

Of course, it was easy for them to cover something like that if they wanted but Shang Qinghua was almost sure that his parents were tired of his behavior, and probably they had saved his ass many times in the past, so now with all he said they surely wouldn’t let it go easily. Maybe it wouldn’t made it to the news, nonetheless, being seen by guest and workers was a black stain in their reputation already.

“You filthy rat, I’ll made you pay for this,” Mo Linguang almost whispered before releasing him. He was already dizzy from the hits but when he gave a light push when letting him go, he lost control of his body and actually fell off the railing! In front of all the surprised looks of the people there, he wasn’t even able to grab himself from anything, his body by itself was barely able to spin so the first thing hitting the floor was his feet, and then his butt, instead of his head.

“Assistant Shang!” he heard someone shout from upstairs, his mind was filled with a mist, he heard some nervous laugh that he discovered was his after raising half of his body from the floor with his elbows and seeing assistant Rong running to his side.

“Damn, it hurst… Why am I conscious?” Shang Qinghua moved his hand towards his face, although conscious, he wasn’t able to do anything else but that, he was feeling a bit lost of what else to do.

“Don’t move!” the assistant said while sitting close to him.

“Tell me something, is my nose broken? Will it be crocked the rest of my life? Can it be saved?” he gripped Rong Qinahui from the lapels of his jacket, only to notice his hands were trembling, full of blood and hurting. The older assistant made him release him softly, while looking completely confused, checking almost every part in Shang Qinghua’s body.

“I don’t think that should be your worry right now, I think your foot is broken…” When he said that, Shang Qinghua was thinking it couldn’t be possible, it wasn’t that high, until he turned around to confirm. “Don’t look!” The shout came too late, he already saw his feet in an unfeasible way, which made him, finally, pass out.

Chapter Text

The next time he woke up, he was, once more, in a hospital bed. It took him some minutes to figure out where he was and almost as much to remember why he was there. Actually, the pain he felt in his hands when he tried to help himself to rise a bit from his sleeping position, the second pain coming from his leg and the last one coming from his face when he groaned from the pain, were the things he needed to remember what happened that night.

With more than one groan from pain, the people talking near his room’s door came running towards him. Once his mind was a tad more lucid, he was able to notice that those people were the manager and Rong Qianhui, not Mo Bei like the last time.

When the realization came to him, about why Mo Bei wasn’t there because there couldn’t be any other possible reason, his anxiousness became a panic attack. He knew Mo Bei had the right to not want to see him ever again, to find him nauseating to the eyes for the things Mo Linguang had shown him and said, however Shang Qingha didn’t want to part without saying goodbye, or how much he had wanted to tell him before anyone else or how he was sorry for keeping it from him for so long, that he didn’t want to hide it for so long and that he would accept if the other hate him.

He had so much he wanted to tell him, to explain, but if he refused to even see him, it would break his heart more than before. Because of that he couldn’t be still, he couldn’t hear whatever the manager and assistant Rong were saying while trying to keep him in bed. When the nurses arrived, he was hyperventilating for the rush in his thoughts and his constant intent to stood up even though the pain in all his body, against the force the hospital personnel were putting in him while trying to make him focus or hear them.

He was used to pain, physical and emotional, even if he never liked it, he could endure it if he wanted, so all their efforts to contain him were useless against his broken heart and mind focused in going to wherever Mo Bei was so he could apologize.

Suddenly, at the door appeared the person he was looking for, Mo Bei seemed like he had run from somewhere because his hair was all messy as his clothes and how his breathing was fast and labored. Until he was sure he truly was him, Shang Qinghua finally stopped. Now that he was there, all the words in his head disappeared and only the tears were able to come out.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry… please… let me explain… please…” he begged with all his energy suddenly drained.

All the chaos risen in the private room cooled down and became a heavy silence while the hurt man apologized in such a broken way, the nurses were at lost at what to do. Looking between both men to know if they should leave or check the recently awakened man.

“I’m really sorry… you can hate me and feel all the repulsion you want but… I wanted to tell you, I truly wanted you to be the only one to know…” while his words came out clumsily, not caring about all the people there, Mo Bei walked towards him and hugged the crying man.

Shang Qinghua cried harder while the taller man didn’t say anything for a while, only holding him, rubbing his back and caressing his hair softly. “Calm down, I didn’t want to leave, I had to, but now I’m back.”

“Why?” He asked with a raspy and broken voice. He could be there only because he had to “pay” for what his family did, even for the guilt of leaving him alone with his uncle; not because he wanted to be there, even less if he was willing to touch him. Once more, nothing made sense for him. Shang Qinghua tried to push him, it would be better because this time the dirtying had a real reason, however, Mo Bei held him tighter, as tight as the pain he knew he was feeling, allowed him.

“I should be the one apologizing, I shouldn’t have left you alone with him, I was surprised and confused, I didn’t know what I saw… I was angry and scared that him or the bastard that was your boss had done something to you…” When Shang Qinghua listened to his reasons, he didn’t know what to say. He wasn’t expecting nothing like that, not even once that kind of thoughts crossed his mind because it wasn’t believable.

“What? No! Nothing like that happened,” Shang Qinghua managed to push him enough for him to finally let him go, of course it made the pain traverse from his palms to his shoulders, yet he bore with it for the sake of keep talking with Mo Bei, because at some point the room was emptied, leaving them alone. “Other than your uncle threatening me for working for you and he sending me to the bastard chief who kicked me and spilled tea over me… there was nothing more to that, I swear. But let me explain what your uncle wanted you to know.”

Mo Bei looked at him some seconds as if trying to find the lie in his words, it was until Shang Qinghua patted the edge of the bed so he could sit, Mo Bei stopped watching him like that. The hurt man was about to move his leg in the cast, until the other man made him stop, then he pulled the chair closer to him, taking his hand inside of his with care.

“I wanted to tell you before anyone else, for me it was the better if no one knew besides of you, but I kept making excuses like I didn’t want to disturb you when you were so busy with the new contracts, or not wanting to sole your happiness or not being the right time.” If his hands didn’t hurt so much, he would be twisting the bedsheets, hence he could only focus his eyes on the union between their hands, still afraid of going to the point. “I was scared, and convinced, you would hate me if I told you, you would find me revolting and because of that, I kept paying the rent of my place and waited for a good moment… because I don’t think you’d like me anymore…”

Before Mo Bei could protest or say that he couldn’t understand, Shang Qinghua prevent him to talk. “Just listen till the end, don’t say nothing even if you want to yell at me… not until I’m done…” With that, Shang Qinghua retracted his hand and freed it from Mo Bei’s hold, feeling the warm for some seconds before the dull pain came back.

His tale started on the second semester of his high school’s first year. His mother asked him if he were planning to go to college, he had considered and decided that the best would be to start working after high school and find somewhere to live. Before he could answer, his mother changed her question into a statement, saying that he would go to college, that she would take care of the expenses needed, only that he should chose a short-term career. With that, she stopped living in the same home as him, warning him than when he went to college, she would sell the house so he should look for a university with dorms.

In high school he did nothing more than study to make it to a good university, then he began a career he didn’t wanted but chose because it was “easier” to find a job with and was short as his mother asked for. While being in college, he studied and took some part-time jobs to save money for his future, knowing too well his mother didn’t care what he would do after graduation. At the end of his major, he began to write his novel to make a few more yuan.

Once he graduated, he discovered that his expenses were paid by a loan his mother made in his name, so he had to paid back to the bank. He used his savings to find a cheap place and to give the first payment of the loan, then he had to look for odd jobs while applying for a job related to his major. Of course, it wasn’t easy, all the few earnings from the jobs were barely enough, until he heard two coworkers talking about a dating site were instead or looking for dating partners, you made fuck buddies.

In that site there was an option in which you could make profit of it, which meant you should be more willing to go into different kinks or be the best of the sex partners. Needless to say, he was scared but it was his only option to make more money and don’t let the debt consume all his earnings because the one-meal-a-day was becoming harder to endure.

His first client was more motivated about “popping his cherry” than any other reason, even was willing to taught him about blowjobs. After two “dates”, he never asked for him again. Whenever he had to go with someone new, he always chose a bar or coffee shop to meet before going to the chosen hotel. It never stopped being frightening, although he was lucky most of the time with people that wasn’t too kinkier. And, besides, he only chose people who was of his liking after going through his profiles to see if they had any bad comments.

The site was simple, the client gave tips and rated the service with stars; the more you get, the best the payment was. People could leave comments about being a good or bad service or client, so it was pretty open, although the owners of the site weren’t responsible if something bad happened. All was on the users, as they had to agree to those terms before accepting the job or dates.

Because of that, Shang Qinghua was too cautious with who he chose, and never going out with too many. At some point he even did it with a woman, but neither him nor her liked it. Or the time he found a sugar daddy that loved having sex with him and paying extra when giving him things he wanted as his TV and laptop, sadly that “relationship” didn’t last more than a month until he found someone new, at least he left without taking anything back.

He slept with something around ten people in seven months until the last one made him erase his profile and promise to never go back to that kind of “job”. It was a man around his thirties, he was charming and kind in the first date, he even asked for normal dates before their sexy time. The first two times were gentle and calm, the third one he shyly asked if he wanted to try some bondage, to which Shang Qinghua accepted because he was curious doing with him and because he had tried before with other of his clients.

(****) 

All the love and passion ended in the fourth sex date when he kind of became a person completely different with the bondage. He hid his drunkenness and turned a lot more violent to the point to draw real blood from Shang Qinghua’s skin; he went from ignoring his safe word and pleas, to even burning him with a cigarette and making him pass out from exhaustion. In the morning, when he realized he had one hand a bit loose, he fled.

(****) 

Once arriving at his home and breaking down, he wrote a complaint against him and erased his profile when the answer came back. Fortunately, he was precautious enough to always chose places too far from his home and on routes he never used, so no one would be able to find him. Nor that he enjoyed going for a drink to those places normally, although after that incident he was even more reluctant.

“After that I took tests every six months, now I took them every year, and I can assure you I don’t have any STD, I can take one now so you can rest easy…” Shang Qinghua couldn’t find the bravery to look at him in the eyes, he was afraid of his angry or disgusted glare. “I’m sorry for not saying anything, I know I don’t have any valuable excuse and you can hate me, but I didn’t want to part, not this time, without telling you… because it wasn’t fair… I’m sorry, I truly am… I won’t bother you any more after this, I won’t ask for any compensation for this, I just want you to…”

Mo Bei stood up, Shang Qinghua shrunk in fear of the upcoming hit, or he so he thought before the taller man hugged him again, only some seconds before he rose Shang Qinghua’s face from his chin to kiss him right in the lips.

“Your imagination wasn’t as wild as usual this time, but as negative as always,” Mo Bei said when he parted, more out of care to not make things more painful for him, rather than having a real desire to let him go. “But I too, prefer to think negatively so when I’m prove wrong, I’m surprised; instead than having to feel disappointed or frustrated when I’m being optimistic.”

“Tell me something,” Mo Bei held his hands again. “You regret it, don’t you? You won’t do it again, right?” He looked serious.

“No, I’m not proud of that past… I don’t want to go through that again.” And he wasn’t lying, although it gave him experience enough to write about sex in his novel, he never particularly enjoyed sleeping with people he barely knew and wasn’t interested in get to know them. That’s why he was decided to be frank with Mo Bei and tell him everything before they had something more serious.

“Then I’m ok with it, I wouldn’t want you to have to go through that, but we can’t change what already happened, now I can only swear to you that I won’t ever let things go hard as much as you have to do that or any other thing you don’t like, I’ll take care of you and never left your side as much as you allow me to.”

“As long as you don’t tell me otherwise, you won’t be able to get rid of me, never.” Shang Qinghua was trying hard to keep his tears from falling, he was tired of letting Mo Bei see him crying so much when he knew himself and how rarely he cried in the past. Although this time it wasn’t sorrow, it was true happiness what he was feeling, not even the fear that everything could disappear at any time.

After their talk, they finally let the nurses get in. Shang Qinghua apologized to all of them and then let them check him up while Mo Bei talked with the manager and assistant Rong outside, he wanted to ease their worries about a possible argument between them, which wasn’t the case this time, although he wouldn’t tell them all the truth.

The nurses and the doctor asked questions to make sure that he didn’t hit his head with the fall without no one noticing and to know how much his pain was, which had gone worse with every passed second for his past struggle and how the painkillers had worn out.

At this point he was used to the large interrogation from the doctor and check ups from the nurse, so he endured as long as they applied more painkillers. They explained him he had a broken ankle because it was the limb that absorbed almost all the hit from the fall, while his other foot, hips, spine and arms had received a bit lowered impact, which made them be so sore. For all that he should keep total rest for the next week and medium rest for the next month.

When his visits came back to the room, Mo Bei told him how his grandparents were paying for all the medical expenses and had hired a butler to take care of him for the next five months. Which was their way to bribe him so he didn’t go tell on what Mo Linguang did, although Mo Bei told them he wouldn’t do it.

As for Mo Bei’s uncle, he would be occupying the same post they said in the banquet to keep the incident as a secret, after four months they’ll sent him to the overseas branch to manage only that from there with some trusty people sent by Mo Bei’s grandparents to keep an eye on him. At first Shang Qinghua was worried that he would have to keep seeing him in the company, but with the resolution was a bit more relaxed until he remembered his threat against Mo Bei.

“Did your uncle didn’t tell anything to your grandparents about me or you?” asked Shang Qinghua after an hour when the manager and Rong Qianhui had left.

“No, he was smart enough to know that whatever he said would be seen as a petty excuse when all the people that was there saw him push you down the rail.” Mo Bei looked as angrier as he sounded when he said all of that, he hated his uncle even more than him.

“Everybody thinks he pushed me?!” asked Shang Qinghua surprised about that, the things happened too fast in the moment, however he never thought the people would think Mo Linguang did it intentionally, not even his parents. Mo Bei’s nod made him scoff a little. “We may hate each other but he wouldn’t kill me with his own hands in front of so many! Truth is I was already too dizzy when he grabbed me by my tie and pushed me not so hard, all the hits were the reason as to why something so light as that push made me fall, I swear.”

“Either way it was his fault.”

“Well yes, I won’t deny that, but I think your grandparents should know, if I keep it like how it’s now, in the future your uncle will find a way to demonstrate it as if I lied to get repaid.” He wasn’t sure if it was possible, it was only because his fear about his uncle dirtying Mo Bei’s name with anything.

“Fine, you’ll tell them when we see them, probably next week if you’re feeling better, they want to talk to you.” As always, his expression when referring to them was full of distrust and without a single piece of pride or love towards them. It was fair.

His first week back at home was a living hell. As the doctor predicted all his body ached, every movement he did, except for his neck, left him feeling in agony because his sore muscles and aching joints. Obviously, he whined all day in the butler’s presence until Mo Bei arrived home, then he endured as much as he could without making big movements so the taller man could rest while being at home and wouldn’t be too distracted when working.

After ten days in pain, at the twelfth since being discharged, he finally attended to Mo Bei’s grandparents’ invitation. It was around noon, he was using the wheelchair although he was now trying to use more the crutches, but because he couldn’t walk too much on those without getting tired, he accepted Mo Bei’s suggestion about the sitting option.

Naturally, he was nervous when they arrived, he wasn’t sure of how to act in front of them, considering how they had the old-fashioned way to see the assistants as servants. Mo Bei, and even assistant Rong, told him to be just formal and courteous, not to have any bigger cares, and to not let them belittle him, although Mo Bei wouldn’t allow it anyway.

They were supposed to have a normal lunch, however, their first intention was to talk with him, so they gathered in the garden table, under a gazebo in the east garden. Shang Qinghua couldn’t believe, still, how big the house had to be to have a “name” for every garden, hall, stairs or whatever needed to differentiate them. At least this time, in the short way towards the meeting place, he was able to see a bit more of the house, which quickly regretted because the only thought formed in his head was: “Mo Bei, you damn pampered rich brat that was raised in a house as enormous as that and still preferred his “small” department and not even a house.”

The tea was already served when they arrived, after some quick introductions, Mo Bei placed Shang Qinghua and then seated at his side waiting for his grandparents to begin their interrogation or whatever they wanted Shang Qinghua for.

“So, tell me assistant Shang, why did you help Mo Bei?” And they were more direct than the other two considered, with one look Mo Bei’s grandfather asked him not to interfere.

“Why? Why not? I knew how to help him, so I helped him” Shang Qinghua felt his hands too unsteady, so he never picked up his tea, and just squeezed his fingers under the table, luckily his voice didn’t tremble. “I didn’t have any motives more than doing something for someone, and most of the time he was the one who looked after me.”

“And you never asked for nothing in return?” It was obvious his grandfather was trying to see why he was still with him and what he was after in exchange for his help, trying to see if he was taking advantage of their grandson.

“Grandfather…” Mo Bei said warningly, from his voice it was too notable he was angry, however nor his grandfather nor Shang Qinghua paid attention to him.

“The day I met him and the next, I was poor and I helped him because I could, I never asked him to pay me back and I wasn’t even considering the possibility, when he asked my help I did it because I didn’t have anything better to do and, in the end, he kind of saved me from my misery without giving me money, only a job, and since then I’ve been paid for my work rather than me extending my hand for someone to give me everything only because one favor, I have never asked him for anything and if you allow me, I’m willing to even pay you back for my medical expenses because I have the money to do it.” Shang Qinghua wasn’t angry, he was kind of expecting that outcome since he was “invited” by them, he had practiced that answer almost since he woke up and Mo Bei told him his grandparents wanted to see him. “I’ll be helping Mo Bei always and be by his side as much as he wants me to, until then I’ll do my best in whatever he askes me to do, because I’m not a slacker, nor a mediocre assistant.”

“You’re pretty straight-forward, huh?” said the grandfather after some seconds of silence in which Shang Qinghua’s determination was beginning to falter, almost making him apologize for what he said, although he wasn’t wrong.

“I’ve learnt that being blunt is best than being a hypocrite, sorry if that offended you.” All of them could see how little sorry he was, still, the grandfather only laughed. His laugh didn’t reach his eyes entirely, although he wasn’t looking angered at all.

“You’re good, I don’t know how you met my grandson, but it appears it was a good thing for him, maybe for both.” He drank from his tea a few times before continuing. “Please, as you said, be by his side and help him, he still needs it and someone he can trust like you at his side is the best thing that could have happened to him, now that he’s back into the business.”

“He’s more capable of what you give him credit for, but I’ll keep it as a promise, and I won’t leave him until he says otherwise, only him.”

The next thing they talked about were less serious, allowing the mood to loosen a bit. They asked him how his recovery was going and if he would need rehabilitation, which wasn’t the case. Even if during their eating time it looked like it wasn’t accustomed to talk, they keep talking about how was managing the company in the beginning and how was now, giving some loose advises to Mo Bei and Shang Qinghua as his assistant. It was all normal and calmed until they did the next question.

“So where’s your family? Are they still around?” Asked the grandmother, who before was like she wasn’t allowed to meddle when business were discussed.

“Oh… I was only with my mom until the last year of high school…” and that was an uncomfortable question because he hadn’t fully had that talk with Mo Bei yet. “She lives in another region and only focus on her job, so we don’t talk that much…” Actually, they didn’t talk at all in the past eight years, more or less, but it wasn’t something he wanted to tell them.

“Now I see how you can be too focused in the job too, then.” With the grandfather’s comment, Shang Qinghua forced a laugh and didn’t say anything. They quickly change the subject again and again until they were finally released.

Shang Qinghua was exhausted when he arrived at the apartment. He wanted to watch movies for the rest of the day and don’t think in whatever happened, although he knew concentration would be something hard to achieve. He was guessing Mo Bei had to go back to the office after dropping him, however, the taller man only led him inside a bit and then pulled him up in his arms to take him to Mo Bei’s room.

He seated him in the bed, only to use his lap as a pillow. He was as tired as him, which made him chuckle and stroke his hair softly. “Don’t you have to go back to the office?”

“Uncle Zhang said I don’t have to, but I know I have to…” he was whining, it was obvious he didn’t want to go. If it weren’t that he was the CEO, he could listen to his own desires. “By the way, congrats in surviving them without licking their feet.”

“I’m a tight hugger expert, but I know who’s worth it,” he said proudly. Surely, it was more an inside joke, even so Mo Bei scuffed laughingly. “And know that I think about it, wasn’t this meeting as getting to officially know your family? Although I hope they never get to know it.”

“Yes, it was, and they won’t know, and even if the bastard says something about it what can they do? Let the news know so they lose their honor when they fire me for dating a man?” Mo Bei’s statement made Shang Qinghua laugh nervously. “Even better if they fire me, we’ll found a new job while still modelling, I’m sure I’ll get good offers from someone who doesn’t care about it.”

“Are you not worried?” To answer Shang Qinghua’s question, he turned, rose a bit to kiss him and then laid down again.

“I’m not, are you?” If Mo Bei wasn’t worried, then he neither was. At least not in that relaxing moment.

After some seconds of comfortable silence, he decided to tell him about his mother. With she, it was impossible a meeting like the one they had with his grandparents, so it was better to use the opportunity to talk. It wasn’t much, anyways, only about how his father left his mother when he was five years old, tired of her bad-temper, and how she had to work a lot to live comfortably and without complaints until Shang Qinghua was growing and looking more like his father.

Because of that, he reminded her about the man, so he became angrier and ruder. She never hit him, only reproached him for looking like him and gave him a cold shoulder until she began to spend less and less time in the house to avoid him. That’s why she wasn’t in his life anymore.

“The bright side of all this is that we won’t have problems to know which family visit first in New Year or any other celebration,” Shang Qinghua chuckled, and Mo Bei easily saw through his attempt to make things less awkward because he moved again to kiss him and then he stood up so he could sit behind Shang Qinghua, holding him from the waist.

“Less people to who we need to hide the fact that we’re together.” The sentence left Shang Qinghua feeling warm, although at the same time he was thinking how his family at some point in the future would be pestering Mo Bei about his heir. It was something important, however it would be something they of the future would have to deal with, not them. “One movie, then I’m off.”

Chapter Text

Shang Qinghua was never someone who was always eagerly waiting for vacations because when he wasn’t in the school, he had to hear his mother’s complaints about how all men were trash, how marriage was useless, how people can’t be trusted and all the hate to the world, whenever she was around. And after he was living alone, although most of his time was well spent writing, there were some moments when he realized how lonely and empty his life was.

Now that he had someone to share the free time with, there was no free time!

His cast was taken off after one and a half month since his fall, and he went back to the office and to his assistant post after Mo Bei had made almost four months since his new CEO appointment. His uncle left the central offices shortly after that, which meant he had to be there and not keep just doing what he was doing from home.

Although the job was not that hard, it was a lot. The two of them made a perfect team, which allowed them to pass work between them and share the load without any trouble, and there was Zhang Ning and assistant Rong too, they never stopped helping them. And yet, the time they had for themselves were mere minutes between meetings in which they kissed on Mo Bei’s desk or in the car whenever they took some minutes off.

At home, after the butler’s contract time was over, they only had enough time to cook their dinner and watch a movie while cuddling in Mo Bei’s bed. Not to say how they didn’t have free weekends because they were still doing the modelling job. Even when Shang Qinghua was able to organize Mo Bei’s schedule, so he took some of the short photoshoots on weekdays, there were some longer he had to do on weekends.

Of course both were exhausted. The last break Shang Qinghua had, were the seven months after his college graduation, since then he had been working, and Mo Bei wasn’t too different from him in that matter. Even if never before neither of them considered vacations as something important, now they were missing it.

That day specially, it was Friday and they had to work in the office until late because it was the last day of June, and the reports for the month had been all that had filled their heads since a week ago.  And the week was even more exhausting because Mo Bei had to go to many meals and dinners with some of his business partners, which meant that the time they spent together in the week was merely for the breakfast.

Mo Bei drove them back to the apartment, the mixed playlist they did with music they both liked was the only noise between them. They loved each other but when their minds were as tired as in that moment, each one was on their own world, and they were okay with it, they had talked about it and only some kisses here and there were needed before sleeping.

Shang Qinghua made some tea while Mo Bei took out some cookies that they ate in silence while going through their day to make sure they did everything they needed to do. After that, Shang Qinghua was the first one to stand up, kiss him in the forehead and attend to his bed’s calling, he wanted to shut off his brain.

He was wakened with the noise coming from a door closing. It took him some minutes to discover he was in the back seat of Zhang Ning’s car and that his pajamas were changed for a random outfit, not so random when he remembered it was the one Mo Bei chose for him back then when the manager and him were playing to the dolls with him.

When he was lucid enough to ask where they were, Mo Bei opened his door and looked at him with surprise. “I though I had to bring you to the airplane asleep.”

“Air… what? Where are we?” he asked while taking the hand that Mo Bei offered him. Once out of the car he saw they were in the airport and some worker was loading off their suitcases. Theirs? “What’s happening?”

“We’re taking some days off,” Mo Bei said nonchalantly, he was more focused in the one with their luggage.

“Are you crazy? We just made the monthly report, there’s still the half year report and the photoshoots that had been scheduled for this week and…” Mo Bei put in his hands a bag with pastries and a cup of coffee.

“Relax, we’ll only take three days, I’ve arranged everything already.” Mo Bei put him a neck pillow and started guide him to inside the airport with his hands over his shoulders while pushing him. When Shang Qinghua looked back, he saw assistant Rong waving at him with a funny smile, as if he was enjoying his curious departure.

“And where are we going?” finally asked, resigned that once again Mo Bei was doing whatever he wanted to do.

“To London, you’ll like it.”

He never thought about leaving his country; as poor as he was, even leaving his city was an unthinkable situation, though he did it when he was only model Mo Bei’s assistant. Back then the idea of going that far from his home was unimaginable. Apparently, after all those years knowing Mo Bei, his impossible situations were not over yet. He shrugged and let himself be dragged to wherever he wanted, if he was with him, everything would be better.

He let Mo Bei do whatever he had planned, because it looked like most of his supposed meetings and dinners were more like escapes for him to arrange everything. They travelled in first class, they landed, and a car was already waiting to take them to their hotel, they slept some hours because the jetlag and then they went to the restaurant and places Mo Bei chose, and although they were tourist, they weren’t like the rest taking photos of everything and speaking as if they knew all that had to be known.

No, they were just taking strolls holding each other hands, kissing from time to time here and there without the fear of being discovered, because they were not the only ones. More than tourists, they looked like a married couple enjoying some free time, even a honeymoon.

At noon, after their meal, Mo Bei left Shang Qinghua in the room while receiving the manager’s videocall asking about his trip, she was more like a mother or an aunt for them than a boss and it was heartwarming. When he was in the middle of describing the Westminster Abbey, Mo Bei came back and walked toward him.

Out of the blue, he kneeled in front of Shang Qinghua and pulled out from his pocket a couple of rings. “Shang Qinghua, I brought you here only because we cannot do this on our own country, and I truly wanted what we had be more than dating... so… will you marry me and stay to my side forever?”

“Mo Bei…  why you… you… seriously…” Shang Qinghua’s words weren’t coherent anymore, once more the tall man in front of him left him speechless with a new unforeseen circumstance that made him wonder if he was dreaming or not. “I don’t know how I ended in a world where everything I could dream of is granted to me, I don’t know what good deed I made in my past life for me to be this fortunate since I met you… so I don’t want to all that good fortune to end, never, only if that means to be with you forever.”

Shang Qinghua stood up, making his phone fall from his lap where he placed it after the surprise, and threw himself over Mo Bei to hug him and kiss him. From his phone he heard a lot of claps and shouts, meaning they all know and wanted to be there when the proposal was being made.

And because all was truly planned since way before, that moment Mo Bei took him with his tablet to one of the hotel’s halls where they had ready the official documents to be signed. Through the tablet the manager, their coworkers, Zhang Ning and his assistant were ready to be part of their wedding from afar.

Shang Qinghua, until then, had never felt less lonely and more loved. The papers signed in there might become useless in their own country, however the feel of belonging one to the other was real, their rings were real even if they will have to wear them in the neck and always hidden to the rest of the people. Even if all their life they will have to hide their love for each other, until they’re safe from prying eyes, nothing would take from them their privacy and all the love they can give each other at home, their home.

Just like after that short and tiny ceremony in which their vows were signed. They received the congratulations from their friends, the toast and ran back to their room because there was only one thing to do, now that they were alone, to celebrate the occasion: sex.

When they made it to the bed, they were more than ready to take each other’s clothes off. Since the elevator’s door closed, they kissed with increasing passion, as if each floor they ascended was elevating their own temperature and horniness.  

It wasn´t their first time, they had done it every few times when they arrived from work not so tired. The fist one was a bit a disaster because Mo Bei was being too cautious while Shang Qinghua was being too eager, and because none of them talked about it before doing it, it was like synchronicity wasn’t theirs.

For the rest of the tries they got better at letting the other know what they wanted. Shang Qinghua easily got rid of his shyness for being the more experienced, and Mo Bei stopped treating him as if everything would be too painful or unpleasant for the other. Once they discovered how good sex was between them and how they always wanted more, they enjoyed it and tried to make themselves some time.

However, all they could do was one or two rounds before deciding to stop, or else they would be too tired to work or too marked for the cameras. Shang Qinghua loved biting and leaving love marks in Mo Bei’s body, while the taller one loved to be too rough when he was more into it, which of course Shang Qinghua loved too.

That’s why that night they decided to finally free themselves from all the past restrains to let all their hidden and suppressed desires come out. And Mo Bei of course was well prepared because he had brought a bag full of the toys and equipment they had been buying the past months. Their relationship may not be sex centered, though they had agreed to try all that there was to try in gay sex, thanks to the internet recommendations.

They made it to the bed and instantly Shang Qinghua was on his knees unzipping Mo Bei’s pants so he could take out his dick and start licking it as if it was an ice popsicle and he too hot. Mo Bei took off his own upper clothes and helped the busy man to took off his, then easily he carried him to the bed to remove the rest for both of them and restart the kissing session.

Once their lips were again all swollen and almost having become insensitive, Shang Qinghua made Mo Bei lay in the bed while placing his body a top of him with his face at his lower part to keep preparing his length with his mouth, before using the lubricant and make him enter him. Mo Bei instantly understood the pose, raising his head to lick at Shang Qinghua’s entrance and play with one and two fingers to enter before preparing him correctly.

After some few minutes with that pleasure, both felt it was enough and the next step was needed. Without time to waste, Shang Qinghua pulled out the lube and began to prepare himself only to provoke more in Mo Bei, which he did satisfactorily because after having only played with two fingers inside himself, Mo Bei moved his hand out of the way to use his own three and four fingers. Laughing at his impatience, Shang Qinghua made use of his now free hand to cover Mo Bei’s phallus with a condom and then in lube while massaging it as if it hadn’t grown big enough.

He was moaning and moving his hips to let the fingers get deeper while the other was trying to find the spot; and Mo Bei was softly groaning as if warning him to not touch him even more or his wild instincts would react. It had happened before, maybe Shang Qinghua’s annus didn’t rip for the brusque insertion, but he was left in some kind of soft pain for some days. For this, he had learnt where Mo Bei’s boundary was set.

With that in mind for the two of them, they stopped almost at their limit. Shang Qinghua set himself onto the bed, facing towards Mo Bei while the taller man rose up and knelt in front of his entrance, moving slowly his member towards him without taking his eyes off his partner. His intense glare and the way he was taking his time, made Shang Qinghua twist in desperation for having him inside already. He loved Mo Bei’s intense glare, that and his body were the things that turned him on more than everything else, even more than the fingering, so it was impossible for him to resist with him looking at him like that.

Because of it, Shang Qinghua was rocking his hips towards Mo Bei, only for the other man to keep pulling it away to tease him in his desperation that was making him hold the pillow with too much strength and groan dissatisfied. He knew Mo Bei wanted him to plead, but he was stubborn too and wanted to keep his pride intact, let the other be the first one to give up.

In a battle of endurance and wits, both were quite the competitors, no one but them knew that better. So, while Mo Bei was enjoying teasing his now-husband, the other was making it more enjoyable with the supplication in his face, so he would be driven to despair. Which wasn’t leading them to nowhere, not that day in which both wanted to show off so much.

When they noticed how stupid they were acting, only then both gave in. Shang Qinghua rose up so he could embrace Mo Bei’s neck at the same time when Mo Bei let his cock fill his insides with a strong charge, not with the force to hurt him, only to enter in one stroke.

With his legs around Mo Bei’s waist and arms over his shoulders, Shang Qinghua let the shaft rock inside of him while the taller man held him from his buttocks to made him go up and down too. At the same time, Mo Bei was biting, licking and sucking one and then the other of his nipples, making his skin became too sensitive. With that, he began to give the same treatment to Mo Bei’s neck skin from one side to the other, going as far as to lick him in the ears and suck at his earlobe. Fortunately, Mo Bei wasn’t ticklish, so the hotness of the moment wasn’t ruined.

When both were close to the release, Shang Qinghua was moaning even louder, clutching the other man’s hair with force while he was parting his cheeks wider so his dick could go deeper to easily reach the spot that had his partner making the sounds he loved so much to hear.

Once the cum came out of both at the same time, Mo Bei fell backwards along with Shang Qinghua that was like a lifeless doll resting over his chest, both breathing quickly. Only after a few minutes Shang Qinghua had the strength to lift himself with his elbows and fill Mo Bei’s face with soft pecks and laugh when the other closed his eyes and smiled tenderly.

The moment he felt energized once more, and taking advantage that the member hadn’t left his innards, he made Mo Bei remain laying while he used the rim of his entrance to stimulate back to life Mo Bei’s cock, helping a bit with one hand in his balls and the other tracing the perfect lines in his body. It wasn’t easy, he practiced a lot when he was in the need of money because that made the people he chose to not reject him so quickly, even though when he gave up on that “job”, he never did it again until he began having sex with his ideal man.

He had never done it with Mo Bei before, because he wanted it to be perfect so he practiced a lot while taking a bath by himself, which wasn’t as common as he had wanted, so it took him all those months until today to reach the level of skill he needed. Only to look at Mo Bei’s surprised face and then heard him moan and move his hips as he wasn’t supposed to be doing as the top, that made all the efforts worth it.

It was extremely tiring, if Mo Bei wasn’t so much into it, it would had taken more than the few minutes in which he had to carefully control his sphincter longer until he was too exhausted to enjoy the next round. That may had happened with his costumers back then, not now and that made him incredibly happy.

The moment he felt Mo Bei’s dick got hard enough to continue, he gathered the rest of his strength to begin riding it. He had his hands over Mo Bei’s chest to give himself a bit more of support while the man himself helped him with his hands on his waist and a bit moving his hips. Soon Shang Qinghua bent down his torso to kiss him, who easily opened his mouth to welcome his tongue and let him roam inside his mouth before taking the control. From time to time, Shang Qinghua used his fingers to tease a bit of Mo Bei’s nipples, he wasn’t as sensitive as him, but it still made him feel a bit more, like in that moment that he arched his back and made his member to penetrate him even deeper, same that force Shang Qinghua to moan inside his mouth.

The room was filled with wet noises coming from their mouths and the fapping sound from their act, the intensity increased as their breathing started to speed up. Shang Qinghua legs were now a bit weaker than when he began, rising was becoming a little bit harder and Mo Bei noticed right away, so he made the change in their position, making the shorter man fall over the bed while holding one of his legs over his shoulder and the other over the mattress.

With the hips sideways, he was able to go the deepest, provoking Shang Qinghua to rise his voice and open his legs to their limit. Whenever he turned to bite the pillow to muffle the noises coming from him, Mo Bei coaxed him with some kisses or playing with his dick that was wet with the cum from the last time. If he still refused to let go and moan openly, like in that moment that he was going crazy of how deep and how much he was feeling, Mo Bei always trapped the base of his phallus between his thump, index and middle finger, which gave him the sensation that the cum couldn’t be released. Only then he came back to his senses a bit to plead to be freed. The taller man always remained with his hand the same way although the supplication coming from the too sensitive man until the time to come had both at their limits.

That was one of the secret kinks that Shang Qinghua acquired and which he found to be too embarrassing. The first time he asked Mo Bei to try it, he was too nervous to say it properly and the other man had to guess it when he saw him eyeing the urethral dilator, the one he bought that time they went shopping for the tools they wanted to try, that one he bought without him noticing, too afraid to say he had used it before and he liked as much as the restricting rings, which he hadn’t bought, yet. He shouldn’t like being restricted, it was one of the things the bad last man did for a time too long for his liking; nevertheless, now he felt some kind of pleasure and safety when Mo Bei was the one inserting it for him, with only looking at him he felt that if would be taken off whenever he said so, in the most convincing way, that way he wasn’t as afraid as he thought he would. Thanks to that, he was able to reenjoy that cringeworthy kink he had and to which Mo Bei hadn’t criticized him for.

Besides, he was determined to find a kink for Mo Bei who was still trying all the things they learnt through watching porn when they were too tired to try them physically. They will have all their lives to find it and try it.

Meanwhile, they came for the second time in the afternoon. This time Mo Bei pulled off his shaft to let Shang Qinghua rest for a bit, while both of them take a break to order some food that helped them to recover some more energy for the next rounds. It didn’t matter if the next day one was feeling hurt everywhere and the other too drained, they will have the whole day to recover before having to go back to their country. From then on, they will find ways to take more days off whenever they needed unstoppable sex to restore their energy and motivation to keep giving their all in their full-time jobs. Together as husbands everything was possible.