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Terrabubble Teen (Cherub) Romance

Summary:

I used this: http://www.springhole.net/humor/awfulteenparanormalromance.htm

I don't know anymore.

Inspired by RoSH!

Work Text:

Terrible Teen Paranormal Romance Story

Caliborn English knew Caliborn English was different from the other boys at school.

She noticed it the very first time she laid eyes on him - there was something about the way he harshly became his an arm when he happened. Also, he seemed to have an unusual knowledge about how to draw yaois. And just last Tuesday after fucking shit up, she saw him gets poked in the eyes.

There was something else she knew: she was in love with him. But she didn't know how to win his affections, for he was always cold and distant.

One night, Caliborn English was reading the motherfucking newspaper about paranormal creatures when she realized the truth: Caliborn English was a Karkat Vantas!

The next day after class, Caliborn English saw Caliborn English head off into a hellish place. ''It's now or never,'' she told herself with resignation, and derped after him.

When she caught up to him, he was standing behind dick sculpture.

''Caliborn English, it's me, Caliborn English. I... I have to tell you something... I love you!''

He sighed deeply and dragged toward her. ''Oh, Caliborn English, there are things you don't understand about me.''

''I know more than you think,'' she breathed. ''I know that you're a Karkat Vantas.''

''It's more complicated than that,'' he said, staring into her shell no eyes. ''Love between your kind and mine is forbidden. They would destroy us both if they knew.''

''I don't care,'' Caliborn English said. ''I could never live without you.''

''Really?''

''Truly,'' she answered.

He reached up and gently caressed her eyeball in his shell yes hands. ''I love you, too,'' he whispered.
And then he kissed her. His kisses were like troll blood-scented asscheeks upon her lips.
The days and weeks that followed were floaty. They died and regenerated, murdered people, and wrote yaois. It seemed that nothing could come between them.
One night while braided eachothers' hairs, a CAW CAW MOTHERFUCKERS was heard from outside the kitschen window. ''They've found us,'' Caliborn English whispered solemnly.
Caliborn English sighed. ''At least we've had this short time together.''
''I won't let them take you from me,'' he promised.

As soon as he spoke, the enemy's leader burst through the door. ''Stand aside!'' the leader ordered Caliborn English.
''Never! She is my true love, and you will not take her from me!'' Caliborn English stood defiantly between Caliborn English and the leader.

''Then you will both die!''

The leader lunged forward, but Caliborn English stood his ground. With a HOLY MOTHERFUCK, he met the leader head-on. In a swift move, Caliborn English ripped off the leader's back and kicked him in the cheek growth. Mortally wounded, the leader gasped and died.
Seeing their mighty leader fall to Caliborn English's strength, his underlings panicked and ran away, disappearing into the night.
''That was amazing,'' Caliborn English breathed.

Caliborn English leaned down and gently brushed his lips against hers, his troll blood-scented breath caressing her cheek. ''Your love for me gave me the strength I needed. Now, everything is perfect.''
''Almost perfect...''

''Almost?''

''Everything would be perfect if you made me like you. I know you can do it.''

''Are you sure? If I did this, you'd never be able to exists again.''

''I'm sure,'' she breathed.

Caliborn English exploded Caliborn English's 6, allowing his very essence to flow into her body. She sighed, then MOTHERFUCKERS.
Soon, the transformation was complete. Caliborn English was now an egg Karkat Vantas, just like Caliborn English. Everything truly was perfect.
The End.