Archive of Our Own ^beta

August 2011

     I woke up in the dark, shabby hotel room and heard the rest of the guys in the adjoining room still partying. I had a bad hangover migraine but that was nothing new. I turned over and glanced at the digital alarm clock on the bedside table. It was 6:20 A.M. I tried to sit up, but my head began to spin, and I flopped back down on the bed. The party noise suddenly got louder and there was a flash of light as the door between the rooms opened and someone came in, closing the door. He, stumbled around in the dark room, I heard the rustling of clothes being removed, then the mattress next to me dipped. I stayed still, hoping that he would fall asleep and let me do the same.

     I lay on my left side, facing away from whoever it was. I was about to drift back to sleep when a big hand landed on my hip, tugging me backward, and a warm, bare, hairy chest pressed up against my back. Obviously, it was Danny. He didn’t say anything at first, and I assumed he just wanted the physical contact. Sometimes he liked to cuddle me. I know that sounds gay or weird, but we both slept better that way. I could smell the whiskey evaporating off his skin. Danny was always drunk this time of night but then so was I, so I wasn’t judging. On the road we all did it. Everybody was plastered off their asses. It was the only way to endure the grueling schedule of endless touring night after night. He snuggled closer to me, and I felt his hot breath on the back of my neck. It wasn’t at all unpleasant. If my head hadn’t been pounding, I’d have just fallen back to sleep.

     I yawned, arching my back to stretch. When I did, my bum pressed against his crotch, and I was immediately aware that his cock was hard. Before I could pull away, Danny’s hand, which was still resting on my hip, clutched me tightly and held me still. He began to rub against me from behind. I tried to scoot away from him, but it only made him hold on tighter. We always play-flirted with each other for the fans. They loved it and came up with stupid nicknames for it like ‘Brusop’ or ‘Bromance,’ but we didn’t normally act like that when we were alone. I was confused by his behavior but chalked it up to him just being drunk off his ass.

     Then I remembered how he’d overdone the flirting act on the stage that night and he’d not been drunk then. The fangirls went nuts when he grabbed my hair, pulled my head up, and kissed me on the mouth while I was playing my guitar solo. He’d kept coming over to my side of the stage, wrapping his arms around me from behind and kissing the back of my neck, or holding his mic so we could both sing into it at the same time. It had felt like he’d been in my personal space way more than he usually was during the entire set. If anyone else noticed it, they didn’t say so. I guess the other guys in the band were used to the way we acted and didn’t pay it any mind.

     I wasn’t sure how to process the situation. Should I just lay still and let him rub off on me till he was finished? He’d fall asleep after that and then I could go back to sleep myself and forget the whole thing even happened. Danny was probably so drunk that he didn’t even realize what he was doing or who he was doing it with. He fell into bed, I just happened to be in that bed, and biology took over. At least that was what my alcohol-addled brain was producing at that moment. That supposition went right out the window a split second later when he shifted position, rolled me onto my stomach, and began to pull my underwear down.

     “The fuck you doing?” I demanded, simultaneously trying to roll back over and make a grab for my boxer briefs at the same time but I was unsuccessful in both respects.

     Danny had my underwear already pulled off me by the time I realized what was happening and he was on top of me at that point so I couldn’t move very well. I attempted to push up on my forearms so I could get better leverage, but one of his big hands grabbed the back of my head and pushed me down flat against the mattress. Adrenaline rushed through my body. I realized that I was in an extremely dangerous position. The music coming from the next room was loud and I wasn’t sure if I yelled for help if anybody would even hear me.

     “Stop it, Danny! You’re scaring me!” I protested, still trying to squirm out from under him, though I knew that wasn’t going to happen.

     He pulled my hair away from the side of my face and began kissing my neck and licking the shell of my ear. It felt good, I wasn’t going to deny that, but I was freaking out. I tried to slow my breathing and calm myself down. I had to be rational. This was Danny, my best friend, and drunk or not, he had to know it was me. He would never deliberately do anything to hurt me. Would he?

     “Danny?”

     Why wouldn’t he answer me? Was he so drunk that he didn’t realize it was me? I was close to panicking at that moment but trying to keep my grip. He wasn’t doing anything that was so awful. Yeah, he was on top of me, naked, rubbing off against me. But he hadn’t tried to shove his dick up my bum or anything like that, so I took a deep breath and forced myself to relax. Danny seemed to notice that I wasn’t fighting him anymore. That was the moment he spoke for the first time.

     “You gonna give it up for me?”

     His voice sounded rough, husky against my ear and it sent shivers down my spine. Did he just ask me if I was going to give it up for him? I tried to look over my shoulder at him, but the darkness prevented me from being able to see his expression.

     “Are you fucking serious? I asked.

     Danny braced himself up on his arms and continued thrusting against me, rubbing his cock along the crack of my ass.

     “You know you want to. You flirt with everyone. You come on to everyone. You make constant sexual remarks and kiss the guys. It drives me fucking crazy,” Danny replied. “You know you want it, Ben.”

     “It’s just for show, all just an act. You know that!” I protested.

     “No, I don’t know that.”

     Danny rolled off me and I sat up quickly. He was moving around in the darkness, but I couldn’t tell what he was doing. He got up and I heard the distinct sound of jeans sliding on a zipper closing and the click of his metal belt buckle.

     “Danny, what are you doing?”

     He didn’t answer me I heard his footsteps retreating. The door opened and he went back to the other room where the rest of the band was still partying.

     “What the actual hell was that shit?” I wondered.

     I reached for the lamp on the bedside table and flipped it on, then looked around for my underwear. I found them under the blanket at the foot of the bed and slipped them back on. I turned the light off and curled up on my side, facing the wall and trying to drown out the sound of the party in the next room. My head was still throbbing, and now, thanks to Danny, so was my cock.

                                                                       ###########################################################

     I woke up with sunlight streaming in my face. I rolled away from it and shielded my eyes, glancing at the clock. The digital display read 5:30 P.M. Fucking great! I’d managed to sleep away another day. I sat up to stretch and noticed Danny laying in the bed next to me. He was wearing a t-shirt and jeans and was facing away from me. He must have come back to bed sometime during the night after I fell asleep again. I started to wonder if the whole thing hadn’t been a weird hangover dream and I’d imagined it all. I got up and went to get a shower.

     While I stood under the hot water, I tried to recall exactly what had happened. I had no proof that anything had happened. I’d about managed to convince myself that it had been my imagination when the shower curtain was yanked aside, and a very naked Danny climbed in behind me. He grabbed my wrists and pinned me face-first against the wet tiles.

     “Fucking tease!” he growled, pushing his body flush against me from behind. “You know what you do to me.”

     “I’m not doing anything to you!” I protested. He let go of my wrists, grabbed my hips, and pulled me back against him. I sucked in a big breath and got water in my mouth. As I was sputtering and trying not to drown, he slid one of his hands down my stomach and wrapped it around my cock.

     “Oh fuck! Danny, what the…” I had every intention of telling him to stop, but then he started tossing me off.

     My head fell back against his shoulder, and I bit my lip to stifle a loud moan, no sense waking up the guys in the next room. He tightened his grip and sped up.

     “Yeah, that’s it. You fucking love it, don’t you Ben.”

     Just as I was about to blow my wad against the shower tiles, he stopped and turned me around. He gripped my chin, tilting my face up toward his, then kissed me hard, directly on the mouth. I found myself trying to rub against him to get some friction to my dick, but it wasn’t enough. His tongue slid into my slightly open mouth and began to roll with mine. I felt hot, and flushed, the water running over his body making him look very enticing to me. It didn’t matter that this was Danny, my best friend; not to mention the fact that he was also a dude! Then, without any other word or warning, Danny pulled his tongue out of my mouth, opened the shower curtain, and walked the fuck out of the bathroom.

     “God damn it!” I shouted in frustration, reaching for my now wilting cock. I tried to jerk off, but I was so confused and flustered that I didn’t have any luck. It was like my cock was hard-wired to only react when Danny was near me.

     “Fucking bastard!” I yelled but there was no reply.

     I finished my shower and just as I was getting out to get dressed, Kyle, the tour manager, yanked open the bathroom door and told me to haul ass, that we had soundcheck in less than an hour. Danny wasn’t in the room when I got out of the bathroom. I hurried to finish dressing, shoved my feet into my black converse low tops, then grabbed my baseball cap and put it on sideways as I headed out the door. Tyler, the personal assistant to the band would come behind us and gather up our clothes and belongings from the hotel rooms to take back to the busses. We’d be leaving after the show tonight to head somewhere else.

     Danny was already on stage by the time I got there. The moment I saw him, dressed in black leather pants and a sleeveless t-shirt, I felt my dick getting hard again and was glad for the tightness of my jeans and the long t-shirt I’d had the foresight to put on. My state of arousal would be well-hidden if I didn’t do anything stupid.

     Sam walked up to me and handed me a cold beer. “Who were you calling a fucking bastard?” he asked.

     “What?” I asked, trying to hook up the wireless for my guitar.

     “I heard you in the bathroom earlier. You yelled God damn it and then called somebody a fucking bastard. I just wondered who you were so pissed at.”

     “Oh, I was just yelling at Danny,” I replied.

     “Makes perfect sense,” Sam laughed.

     I hated soundcheck and I really hated it today. The sun was beating down on us and it was sweltering and extremely humid. The shower I’d just taken wasn’t going to make any difference. In a matter of minutes, I’d be sweating like a whore in church. To make matters worse, Danny was ignoring me. Not that I wanted him to do anything in front of the other guys, but it felt weird. Our sexual tension on stage was something the fans, especially the girls, expected. If our dichotomy was off, everyone would notice it and then the next Kerrang magazine story about us would have the headline “Trouble in Paradise for Asking Alexandria. Brusnop is Over!” Well, whatever the hell. Let them talk shit if they want to.

     “Fuck it,” I mumbled, still struggling with my wireless setup.

     “Need some help?” Mike asked. He came over, adjusted the wireless and got it working then helped me put in my in-ears. “Not feeling it today?”

     “Nope,” I answered but didn’t volunteer anything else.

     I looked up to see Danny chatting up a redhead at side stage left. She had enormous tits and a great ass. I couldn’t help noticing her myself. She only had eyes for him, though. They always wanted Danny first, then if he wasn’t interested, the rest of us got in line. Asking might be my band, but Danny was the frontman. I was just a satellite orbiting his star. It made me a little sad to think that I’d always be second.

     “Fuck it,” I mumbled again, and Matt glanced up at me raising his eyebrow. He must have thought I was having a come-apart or something.

     “Bruce are you gonna be able to do this?” he asked.

     “Yeah, I’m just…”

     “He’s sexually frustrated cause I keep edging him and won’t let him cum,” Danny said as he walked up to us.

     I glared at him as everybody else laughed at what they assumed was another one of our bromance jokes.

     “Yeah, you fucking cock tease!” I yelled. “What kind of selfish prick does that to his best friend?”

     Danny just grinned, his dimples showing through the couple of days’ worth of ginger stubble he was sporting. At least the tension had been cut a bit. Now things felt more like normal. Soundcheck went ok, and we left the shark stage to go to the tents set up on the backlot for the bands. They were stocked with refreshments and snacks and had fans blowing so we could at least get out of the heat for a bit.

     Danny disappeared and I assumed he was somewhere shagging that redhead. I sat down in a folding chair next to James and sipped my beer. James was texting Brandi and ignoring me. I was between girlfriends and didn’t have anyone to text, so I was surprised when my phone pinged. I pulled it out of my jeans pocket and glanced at the screen.

     “Are you horny?”

     “Fuck you, Danny!” I replied.

     “No, Ben, fuck you,” he answered. I didn’t bother honoring that with a reply and shoved my phone back in my jeans. I turned to James and tried to get him to talk to me.

     “Who are you texting?” I asked, knowing full well that it was Brandi.

     “My girlfriend,” he answered.

     “She doing ok?” I asked.

     “Yeah.”

     Well, so much for the conversation with James. He clearly didn’t want to talk to me Who could blame him. The sun was suddenly blocked from in front of me and I looked up to see Ronnie Radke.

     “Hey, Ben! How you doing?” he asked.

     “Oh, you know, baking in this fucking heat,” I answered.

     “Yeah, me too. Hey, why don’t you come by our bus tonight after you play? We play before you guys. You could hang with us. I got some good shit.”

     “I thought you didn’t drink or do drugs anymore?” I asked.

     “I don’t, but I still have access to the goods, and I know you still use. Come party with us,” he encouraged.

     James looked up at that moment. “We have to leave right after we play. Kyle says so.” I noticed that James was not smiling and looked pissed off. I wasn’t sure why he seemed irritated with Ronnie.

     “I wasn’t talking to you James,” Ronnie stated.

     I felt the tension rising and noticed Sam had walked up and joined the group at this point. Cameron was standing a few feet away as well, watching the interaction.

     “Ronnie, Ben doesn’t need to be around that shit. He has a drinking problem,” Sam said.

     Ronnie shrugged. “Come by if you want to, Ben. I’d love to see you. If not, hang with these limp dicks.”

     Ronnie walked away and the tension deflated immediately. I sat back down beside James and took a sip from my bottle of water. Did the guys think I had a drinking problem?

     “Ignore that prison rat,” James said, as he went back to texting. “Danny doesn’t want you around him.”

     “Danny doesn’t want me around him? Why?” I asked but before he could answer, my text alert pinged.

     “Come here.”

     “Fuck you, Danny!”

     “I said come here!”

     “Where the fuck is here?” I texted, looking around to see if I could spot him anywhere.

     “Get up, walk toward the shark stage and you’ll see me.”

     I got up, keeping my phone out in case I couldn’t find him and started walking toward the stage. I’d almost made it all the way there when I noticed him standing near an open door at the back of the stage concessions. I put my phone away and headed over to him.

     “What the hell do you want?” I asked.

     Danny grabbed my arm and shoved me through the open door and down a short hallway. He opened another door that led into a storage room. There were stacks of folding chairs and equipment but not much else. When he closed the door to the hall, it was pitch black with only a small slit of light coming from beneath the door.

     “What are you doing?” I cried. “We’ll get locked in here!”

     “The door doesn’t have a lock. Do you think I’m stupid?” he asked.

     He pushed me up against that unlocked door and began to palm me through my jeans. I didn’t even try to fight him. Every ounce of my being wanted exactly what he was giving me. I had a suspicion that he was just going to edge me again and then walk out but I didn’t care. I was taking whatever I could get.

     “Why you talking to Ronnie?” he demanded. "I don't want you talking to that son of a bitch!"

     “I couldn’t find you,” I replied, hoping that he would be nicer to me if I was nice to him.

     “You want him?” Danny asked, leaning close and licking up the side of my neck.

     “No!” I gasped.

     “Do you want me?”

     I was in a quandary. If I said I wanted him, then I’d be admitting to something that I didn’t really want to say. If I said I didn’t want him, then he’d walk out and leave me hanging again. I had no choice but to be honest.

     “You know I do.”

     Once it was out, it felt like a weight off my shoulders. Danny pressed his forehead against mine and rubbed noses with me.

     “Was that so hard to admit?” he asked.

     “It was, actually,” I replied.

     “Kiss me,” he demanded, and I didn’t consider objecting. His tongue slid into my mouth at the same moment that his hand slid down the front of my jeans and into my boxer briefs.

     He struggled to get a good hold on my cock, but my jeans were too tight. He pulled his hand out, popped open my belt buckle, and yanked my jeans open. I hoped he hadn’t ripped out the zipper or I’d have a big problem when we headed out onto the stage in less than an hour. I didn’t have time to think about that as my jeans and underwear were both soon down around my ankles. Danny broke the kiss and backed away from me for a second, then he wrapped his hand around the base of my cock. Before I realized what he was doing, he knelt in front of me, and my cock was engulfed in his hot mouth.

     “Oh, fuck me!” I cried out, my hands splaying out on the door behind me for balance.

     Danny hummed and popped off for a second. “I will later.”

     I wasn’t sure if I should take that as a threat or a promise. But it didn’t matter. He was back on me; his mouth so much stronger and more precise than any girl had ever been. He knew what to do and how to do it. It made sense. Only a guy would know exactly what another guy would want. One of my hands found its way into his long, hair and tugged. He growled and that sent a glorious vibration along the length of my cock. I couldn’t help thrusting into his mouth. He didn’t seem to mind. I wondered if he’d ever done this before and if so, with who. It made a twinge of jealousy roll through me and my hand in his hair tightened. I had no claim on him like that, but I felt it just the same. He sped up his motions, sucking harder, faster, stronger, flicking the head of my cock with his tongue each time he reached the tip.

     I was so pent up by that point that it wasn’t going to take me much longer. I was close, right on the edge. I could feel my balls tightening up, the pleasant itch about to explode into a hallelujah. Then it was gone. Danny pulled off me, yanked my jeans and underwear up, kissed the tip of my nose, and walked out.

     “FUCK YOU!” I screamed. I leaned against the door as it shut behind me and banged my head on it a few times. Why did I think he was going to get me off? He’d already denied me once today. Maybe this was his way of paying me back for cock blocking him the night before.

                                                               ************************************************************************

          We were waiting in the wings for Matt or Kyle to give us our cue to head up onto the stage. The sun had started to go down and it was a little bit cooler but still hotter than a fresh fucked fox in a forest fire. James was at the top of the steps as he always went out first. Cameron would go out second followed by Sam, then me. Danny was always the last one. He was the one they all came to see anyway. Save the best for last, I guess. I could feel him standing close behind me. Occasionally, he would lean up and breathe down the back of my neck. I refused to turn around and acknowledge him. Let him think about that for a minute. I was beyond ‘sexually frustrated’ at that point.

          I watched the others go up and was on the top step myself, waiting on my cue from Matt when Danny grabbed my hips, spun me around, and kissed me. It wasn’t a peck on the lips. It was a hard, demanding, ‘I wanna fuck your mouth with my tongue’ kind of kiss and he’d done it right in front of Kyle and Matt. When he turned me around and gave me a shove out onto the stage, I was in a lust daze, my lips slightly swollen, and my cock hard as a rock and straining against my zipper. I stumbled into my usual spot left of center and was barely cognizant of my surroundings.

     When Danny ran out and the crowd exploded in shouts and applause, I realized I’d missed my cue to start playing and quickly got my shit together. If the fans noticed, they’d no doubt think I was drunk or high. Danny had picked the setlist for tonight and the first song was The Prophecy. It was one of my favorites to play. I tried not to notice what he was doing and to get into my usual rhythm. At first, he ignored me and played up to the crowd, but it didn’t take him long to start his shit. He got behind me, pulled me back against him, and started grinding on me. The girls in the audience started cheering and the guys looked either disgusted or turned on. It was always hard to tell. Then he left me alone for a bit and harassed Cameron and Sam. He never stayed away from me very long, though.

     The second song was Not Your American Average and I started to get a little nervous, just as I always did when we played it. I had a small solo part where I sang a few lines. It wasn’t difficult, just made me self-conscious. Danny walked over to me a few moments before that part of the song, and then when I was reaching for my microphone to adjust it, he yanked it away from me, held out his microphone for me to sing into, and put his arm around me, grabbing the back of my head firmly in his other hand. He leaned up, into the microphone.

     “Sing,” he demanded, running his hand through my hair. I started singing, my voice a little shaky. I was so damn nervous.

     “One step too late, and I never told you…”

     Danny leaned closer and began to sing with me into the shared microphone.

     “That I can’t take another disappointment.”

     As I finished the last two lines, he sang with me, his hand running through my hair, his mouth only inches from mine. When I was done and Cameron started up the rhythm guitar riff, Danny pulled the microphone away, and planted another one of those blistering kisses on me, like the one he’d just given me before I hit the stage. I was so flustered that I missed the “10-inch” line I was supposed to throw in. Nobody noticed though. I would normally have just laughed off something like that, but I realized that it meant a whole lot more than it usually would have. I felt dizzy and light-headed. I had to shake it off or I wouldn’t be able to finish the set. As soon as the song was ended, I took a moment to go back by James’s drum set and grab a bottle of water. I splashed it on my face and took a couple of sips.

     “What the hell is going on?” Kyle demanded. “You’re acting like your stoned or something, and I get that you and Danny do the ‘bromance’ thing for the fans, but this is taking it a bit too far. What next, is he gonna blow you center stage?”

     “My God! I hope the hell not!” I answered.

     James was giving me the side-eye with one of his eyebrows raised in a questioning look. I ignored him and got back out front just in time to start the third song. Nothing too crazy happened during Alerion but it was short and sweet. My respite wouldn’t last long. Before we started the fourth song, Danny was back at it. I climbed up on one of the speakers and jumped off. It was something I did at almost every show, but I was off my game tonight, and I landed a bit odd. I dropped down to my knees instead of landing on my feet. Danny took advantage of it and ran up to me. He grabbed my head with both hands and shoved my face into the crotch of his jeans. I was too shocked to react, but the roar from the crowd was deafening.

      He didn’t hold me there for more than a few seconds, but it was more than enough for me. I knew better than to do anything in front of the fans but if Kyle had thought the French kiss was too much, I was sure he was about to shit kittens. I didn’t look at Danny when he let go of me. I got up and went to get another drink.

     “Do something about him,” I begged Kyle.

     “What the hell do you want me to do, Ben?” he asked.

     “Pull him out and tell him to knock it off!” I insisted.

     “He’ll probably just act up more if I get on his shit,” Kyle warned.

     “He’s pushing it,” I replied, then headed back to my spot.

     When we started the next song, I ran to the other side of the stage and switched places with Sam. I could be closer to Kyle that way and if Danny tried anything else, I’d just run to another spot and keep moving around if I had to. Sam glanced at me as we traded positions and gave me a sympathetic look. I was lucky for the next three songs though. Danny got the idea that he was taking things a bit too far and didn’t bother me. When we got to the last song of the night, the fans started chanting ‘one more song’ like they always did. I had not been on my game all night and I just wanted to get the set over with. Danny was thoroughly enjoying himself though. I stayed back a bit and began playing my guitar part for “I Used to Have a Best Friend but He Gave Me an STD.”

     Danny walked up to me, grabbed my crotch, and licked the side of my neck. I shoved him away and flipped him off. I suppose his actions fit the song, but I didn’t appreciate the way he was using me for his own entertainment. I was the first one off the stage when we finished the song. Normally I would be one of the last ones, staying to thank the fans for coming out to listen to us. I was over it all. I tossed my guitar to Matt and literally ran across the backlot toward the bus. There was already a line of girls standing outside the fence waiting to get on. They were going to be disappointed tonight because we were leaving as soon as the last band played.

     For a split second, I considered taking Ronnie up on his offer. I could use something stronger than alcohol at the moment but I knew if I went to that bus, I'd probably regret it. Danny had warned me not to talk to Ronnie though I had no idea why he felt so strongly about it. James and Sam had both been putting out a vibe that they didn't want me around him either. Maybe they knew something I didn't know. I decided to err on the side of caution and just head into my bunk, pull the curtain, and hide from the world. 

     I banged on the doors and Tyler let me in. He tried to ask me what was up, but I shoved past him and went to my bunk. I didn’t bother with a shower. I yanked the curtain shut and turned over on my side. I didn’t want to see or talk to anyone right now, especially Danny. It wasn’t long before I heard the guys coming back. Thankfully, Tyler must have tipped them off to leave me alone because nobody bothered me. I wasn’t the least bit tired since I’d slept all day and the last place I really wanted to be was inside a cramped bunk on a smelly bus, but I had no choice. They started partying right away. I didn’t know what to do. Part of me wanted to go join them but the other part of me wanted to be someplace quiet. The bus pulled out of the lot, and we started off down the road to wherever we’d be playing next. The moment of peace didn't last, though.

     The sound of footsteps outside my bunk sent my adrenaline jolting up. The curtain was yanked aside, and somebody grabbed my arm. I felt myself being pulled out and I landed on my ass on the floor. I didn’t stay there long, though. Danny dragged me up and shoved me down the hall toward the bathroom. He pushed me through the door and came in behind me, slamming it shut. He grabbed my face and simultaneously shoved me against the wall and slid his tongue into my mouth He drove his knee between my knees then shoved his thigh against my crotch and started grinding on me. I put both hands on his chest and tried to push him off me, but it was an exercise in futility. He wasn’t budging. The harder I tried to fight him, the harder he ground against me. By the time he pulled away from the kiss, I was breathless.

     “Run away from me, will you? Ask Kyle to get on my shit, will you? You little punk! I oughta drag you out there naked, throw you over a table and fuck your ass! I bet they’d love to see that, you arrogant shit! You think everything’s about you, don’t you, Ben fucking Bruce! ‘Asking Alexandria is my band.’ Yeah, we’ll see about that, won’t we? It might be your band, but they come to see me.”

     “They come to see all of us!” I protested but he wasn’t listening.

     He grabbed my shoulders and shoved me down on my knees on the floor, then yanked the front of his jeans open and pulled out his cock. I tried to get up and he shoved me back down again.

     “Open that pretty mouth, Ben. Open it right now or I swear, I’ll tie you down and edge you all fucking night. You’ll have a God damn stroke before I’m done with you.”

     I could have screamed for someone to help me, and someone would have come, but they’d have to beat down the locked door. I looked up at him. He was standing there, looking down at me, his big cock in his hand, already well on the way to full erection. He must have noticed how scared I looked because he reached down and cupped my chin in his hand.

     “Come on, Ben. You know I’m not mad at you. I told you earlier that you drive me crazy. I wasn’t kidding. You do.”

     “I don’t want to do this here,” I pleaded. “Can’t we…”

     “What? Go back to your bunk? Not very private, is it?” he answered. “I wanted to do it in the hotel last night, but you weren’t having it. I waited days for that hotel night and had to go to sleep with a hard-on.”

     “Is that why you’ve been torturing me all day?” I asked. “Danny, I wasn’t trying to stop you. I was just freaked out. I didn’t know what you wanted. By the time I figured it out, you were walking out the damn door. I called out to you, but you were already gone.”

     Danny ran his hand through my hair and smiled. “Then let’s not tease each other anymore. Be a good lad and suck me off a bit. It’s the least you can do since I did it for you earlier.”

     “You left me hard and wanting in a fucking storeroom under the shark stage!” I protested.

     “Ben, stop stalling,” Danny answered, tugging my chin forward. “Open your smart mouth and suck me off.”

     I knew he was on to my ruse. I had two choices. I could do what he wanted, or I could refuse. If I refused, I’d be going back to bed with a hard cock and so would he. Danny would probably be pissed. I’d be nursing blue balls and it wasn’t something I was looking forward to.

     “I won’t be any good,” I said, reaching up and brushing the tip of his cock with my fingers.

     Danny shuddered and guided my hand to wrap around the base. “Just try for me,” he encouraged.

     I opened my mouth, and he pushed the tip of his cock in. It tasted salty but not unpleasant. Danny wasn’t the most hygienic person on a good day, but I was lucky. He smelled like soap and must have showered at some point after we played earlier. I worked to breathe through my nose as he thrust forward, one hand on the back of my head to hold me still. I gagged a little and he pulled back to let me get my bearings.

     “Easy, Ben. You don’t have to take the whole thing. Just go as far down as you can. Use your tongue, flick it around a bit, you know, like you like the girls to do when they suck you off.”

     I took a breath through my nose, tightened my grip on the base of his cock, and did as he asked, taking in just what I could without gagging, then applying the suction as I slid back to the tip. I flicked the head of his cock with my tongue, and he shuddered again, moaning softly.

     “God, Ben, that feels so fucking good. Do you know how long I’ve dreamed about that mouth of yours? Do you have any idea how long I’ve wanted you like this?”

     I couldn’t answer since my mouth was full of cock. He was fully erect now and I felt some trepidation about the size of him. He had a big one. It was bigger than mine. If he wanted more than just my mouth tonight, then I hoped to hell he had some lube hidden in one of his pants pockets or I wasn’t gonna be able to walk tomorrow. I shifted position to take some of the pressure off my knees, and leaned forward, taking more of him into my mouth. I began to slide my hand along the base of his cock as I went down on him, and he moaned again.

     “You’re a natural, Benny!” he encouraged. “Hold still and let me fuck your mouth.”

     He pulled my hand off the base of his cock and gripped my head in both hands. I put my hands on his thighs to steady myself as he began to thrust shallowly into my mouth. I was really struggling not to gag but when I relaxed it was easier. I tried to imagine how we looked, me on my knees in front of him like that. Somehow that visual aroused me; the thought of one of the other guys opening the door and walking in on us even though I knew the door was locked.

     “Damn, baby!” Danny gasped. “I’m so close. I’d love to blow right in your mouth, but… Oh fuck!” he cried as he suddenly pulled off. I watched as he gripped the base of his cock, squeezing tightly and forcing himself to deep breathe.

     “Just imagine your fucking your mother,” I teased.

     “Is that what works for you?” he asked, grinning down at me.

     Before I could answer, there was a loud pop from somewhere beneath us. The bus lurched to one side and Danny fell over against me. I caught him before he hit the door and helped him get upright.

     “What the fuck?” he demanded, yanking up his jeans. “Did we hit something?”

     He opened the bathroom door and I followed him out into the hall. Anything that hadn’t been properly secured, like several full bottles of liquor, was now rolling all over the floor and we had to pick our way through the mess to get to the front of the bus. Kyle was helping the bus driver pull on the steering wheel to get us to the side of the road.

      “What happened?” I asked Sam who was sitting on the sofa in the front lounge.

      “I think we blew a tire,” he replied.

      Kyle and the driver got out and went to check. I heard Kyle cussing and the sound of something hitting the side of the bus which was probably his fist. When he and the driver got back on, he was on his phone calling the driver of our second bus where most of the equipment was stored, to let him know what was going on. A few minutes later, the second bus pulled off on the side of the highway behind us and we all just sat milling around in the front lounge waiting to see what would happen. Kyle was on the phone with a tow driver. Apparently, the tire was badly damaged, and the rim had been bent. He’d found part of a chunk of metal embedded in the rim from whatever the tire had hit, and we weren’t going anywhere in this bus tonight.

      “Ok, guys. Everybody in the other bus,” Kyle ordered.

      “You mean we all gotta pile in there with our gear and everything?” Cameron asked.

      “Yeah, unless you plan on sitting here on the side of the road to wait for the tow truck driver,” Kyle answered.

      “Can’t we just get a hotel and head out in the morning?” James asked.

      “We won’t be able to make it to Milwaukee in time for the show,” Kyle reminded him.

      Just then the driver from the second bus climbed in and motioned for Kyle. Kyle walked out to talk to him, and Sam leaned up, opening the window a crack so he could hear their conversation. We heard another loud bang on the side of the bus and Kyle reappeared.

      “Looks like we might be missing that show after all,” Kyle lamented. “The other bus has a flat tire too. He must have hit whatever we hit.”

      Kyle sat down and started flipping through his phone to find a local taxi company. I glanced over at Danny and noticed that he was staring at Kyle with the corner of his mouth slightly raised in a hint of a smile. Hadn’t he said that he had been waiting forever for a hotel night? Looked like we might be getting one.

      Kyle had managed to find a taxi company that had a shuttle and after about an hour of sitting on the side of the busy freeway, the shuttle arrived. We’d all packed up the bare minimum of what he would need and shoved it into our backpacks. On the ride to the hotel, I sat next to Danny. He reached over and took my hand, wrapping his fingers through mine. Nobody could see us in the van’s dark interior and it felt very intimate. We sat outside in the van while Kyle got room keys for us at the same hotel we’d just been at the night before. When he came back out, he looked glum.

      “Guys, the situation is thus. All they have available is one double queen room and a single king room. Two of you can take the king room and the other three will have to take the double queen.”

      “I call dibs on the king room!” Danny shouted. “Ben can sleep with me.”

      The other guys groaned but nobody really argued too much. It was the usual sleeping situation regardless of the number of beds. I got my bag and slung it over my shoulder, following Danny through the blistering August night and into the hotel lobby where the blast of cool air hit me in the face. It was a relief. I was warm all over without the summer heat. Me and Danny would be sleeping in the same bed tonight. As we rounded the corner to the elevator, Danny spun around and leaned over to whisper in my ear.

      “Hope you’re ready for this, Bruce. Your ass is getting fucked tonight.”

      I didn’t say anything in response. I was so nervous at that point I wasn’t sure I could vocalize properly. I stood next to him in the elevator and could feel the sexual tension growing between us. Cameron seemed to notice that something was up.

      “God, Ben, you look like you’re gonna be sick. Are you ok?”

      “He’s nervous. He’s about to lose his boy-on-boy virginity,” Danny teased, leaning over, and licking the side of my face.

      “Knock it off!” Kyle warned.

      Danny grinned at Kyle but said nothing else. Me and him were in a room on the 4^th floor and the rest of the guys and crew were on the 5^th floor above us. When the elevator stopped on the 4^th floor, Danny grabbed my arm and pulled me off.

      “Don’t be too brutal on him,” James teased. “It’s too far into the tour to find a replacement guitarist.”

      “Shut the fuck up, James!” Kyle hissed. “I’ve about had it with this immature shit for one night.” The doors slid closed, and we were left standing in the empty corridor.

      “Come on,” Danny said.

     He turned and began to walk down the hall. I followed him, adjusting my pack as it slipped down my arm. He stopped in front of our door and slid the keycard into the slot. I almost wished it wouldn’t work, but it did, and the door swung open. He walked in and dropped his pack on the floor next to the bed.

     “Why don’t you go get a shower? I know you didn’t bother with one after the set tonight.” He put his hand on the side of my face, then leaned down and brushed his lips against mine. “Go get cleaned up for me.”

     I nodded and headed into the bathroom. I dropped my pack on the bathroom floor and fished around in it for a clean pair of boxer briefs. I put them on the sink, then flipped on the water and adjusted it, stripped off, and climbed into the shower. I was so anxious that my hands were starting to shake, and I could barely get the package of hotel soap open. I dropped it twice and would have been cussing out loud if not for the fear that he would come running in and find me bent over, looking for it.

     I took a bit longer than usual as I wanted to be sure I got very clean. Guys in their twenties don’t usually spend a lot of time in the shower anyway. At least I never did unless I was planning on a hook-up later. This was going to qualify as a hook-up night. I refused to think about the fact that I was hooking up with my best friend who was three years younger than me. I pulled my razor out of my backpack and took a few deep breaths to steady my shaking hands. I wanted to do a little manscaping before I went back in the room. A few months earlier, Danny had dared me to shave off all my body hair and I’d stupidly done it. He said he liked it, though. Maybe I should do it again. I lathered up and shaved my armpits first, then the few scant hairs I had on my chest and stomach. I wasn’t going to shave my legs. I didn’t think I had enough time. I shaved off my bush and the hair on my balls, then did some creative acrobatics to shave my ass cheeks and the crack of my ass, although I didn’t really have much hair in either place.

     Once that horrendous job was complete, I lathered up and scrubbed every square inch of my skin, then it occurred to me that maybe I should ‘clean out’ as well. Danny hadn’t asked me to, but I was self-conscious enough as it was. I had heard that if you took a plastic water bottle or a flimsy shampoo bottle and filled it up with water, you could use that. I had part of a bottle of water in my backpack, so I pulled it out and filled it with warm water then pushed it against my asshole and squeezed the water out. It took me a couple of tries to get most of it inside of me, but it felt so damn weird. I held onto it as long as I could then left the shower running when I got out to get rid of it. I did it twice to be thorough, then scrubbed myself again from head to toe.

     By the time I finally got out, I was starting to wrinkle up like a prune. I ran some gel through my hair and pulled out the blow dryer to get it mostly dry or else it would be a complete frizzy mess the next morning. When that was done, I rushed through brushing my teeth and gargling some hotel mouthwash, then I put on my deodorant and slipped my underwear on. I glanced at myself once in the bathroom mirror. Ok, this was it.

     Danny had pulled the bedspread off the bed and tossed it into a corner of the room. The sheets were flipped to the foot of the bed, and he’d turned the lights off. The only illumination in the room was coming from the television that was set to a music channel of 80’s hair metal, no surprise there. I was glad for the music. It would make the uncomfortable quiet of a hotel room when there wasn’t a party going on next door, bearable. He was sitting on the side of the bed in his underwear smoking a cigarette. He lit another and handed it to me.

     “This is a no-smoking room,” I reminded him.

     “I don’t give a fuck,” he replied grinning up at me. “Sit down, sexy.”

     I climbed into the bed beside him and stretched out, enjoying the much-needed smoke. It would help calm my nerves a little. He leaned over and ruffled through his pack.

     “You need something strong tonight?” he asked.

     “What?” I questioned, turning toward him.

     He sat back up with a baggie full of something white. It could have been cocaine, or it could also have been heroin. I wasn’t sure which. I was instantly on guard. I needed Danny to be clear-headed tonight. If he wasn’t, then I could get hurt.

     “No, and I don’t want you to either,” I replied.

     He looked over at me and I shook my head no to ensure he got the message. He shrugged and put the baggie back in his pack, then stretched out beside me in the bed.
      “Just thought it might help you relax,” he said, taking a drag off his cigarette and slowly exhaling.

     I watched him as he leaned over and tapped his ashes into an empty soda can on the bedside table. Damn, he was fucking gorgeous. How could one man have gotten such good genes? He held the can out to me, and I tipped off my ashes into it, then took another drag myself. We lay like that in awkward silence, smoking and tipping our ashes until we’d both finished our cigarettes and there was nothing left to do or say. It was now or never.

     “Are you nervous?” he asked, crushing out his cigarette and reaching for mine to put it out as well.

     “Yeah, I’m not gonna lie,” I replied.

     “Why? Are you afraid it’s gonna hurt?”

     “Yes, but honestly, I’m worried that it’ll change things between us,” I admitted.

     Danny propped up on one arm and leaned over me. He ran his hand down my chest and cupped me through my underwear.

     “It won’t change anything, Ben. I loved you before, I love you now, and I’ll love you even more tomorrow morning.

     As sappy as that sounded, I knew he was being serious, or at least, trying to be. I nodded and let out a breath, then looked up at him. He was looking intently at me and for a moment, we just stayed like that, staring into each other’s eyes. Normally, something that intimate would have bothered me. I didn’t like making direct eye contact and I’d noticed that he didn’t either, but it didn’t seem to be like that with each other. It occurred to me that I was completely comfortable with him and only with him.

     “You ready to do this?” Danny asked. “If you’re not, then say so, cause once I start, I ain't gonna wanna stop.”

     I nodded then reached up and traced my fingertips along his jaw over the couple of days of stubble. I never felt nervous or anxious during sex with the multitude of groupies we all screwed after the shows, but this was something else entirely. I started to understand how they must feel. It wasn’t easy being in a vulnerable position. I was the type of guy who always needed to be in control of everything. I wasn’t in control of this situation at all. Danny was obviously the one doing the driving tonight. I’d heard enough stories about how awful catching could be if it wasn’t done right. I’d never had sex with another guy before. Every guy thinks about it but doing it was a whole different thing.

     Danny must have noticed how quiet I’d gotten. He grinned down at me and chuckled. “What’s going through that head of yours?”

     “Just nerves I guess,” I answered.

     “Relax, Ben. I’m not gonna hurt you,” he assured me. “How about you get naked for me, yeah?”

     I let out a breath and nodded again, then reached for my boxer briefs and slid them down, kicking them off the foot of the bed. Danny slipped out of his as well and leaned over to get something out of his bag on the floor. He sat back up and put a condom and a small bottle of lube on the bedside table. It was then that he noticed I'd shaved everything off for him.

     "Nice, baby! Did you do all this for me?" he asked, grinning down at me. 

     I nodded, swallowed my slight feeling of humiliation, then waited to see what he'd do next. He braced himself over me and leaned down, brushing my lips with his. Heat coursed through my body and I made a grab for my cock, intending to give it a few pumps to take the edge off but he wasn’t having it.

     “Don’t touch!” he scolded, grabbing my hand, and pulling it away. “I’ll tie you up if you do that again,” he warned.

     “Please don’t tie me up,” I begged.

     “Don’t give me a reason to, then,” he replied.

     Danny rolled on top of me, took both my wrists in his hands, and pinned them to the bed on either side of my head. He looked down at me and smiled. God, he was so beautiful! How could he possibly be turned on by me? I wasn’t handsome like him. He leaned down and kissed me again, driving his tongue into my mouth and nipping at my lip rings with his teeth. That was a massive turn-on. Both our cocks were trapped between our stomachs, and it felt so good when he slid against me. I was breathless by the time he pulled out of the kiss. He released my wrists and moved his mouth down the side of my neck and over my chest. He bit down hard on each of my nipples, then glanced up at me.

     “Why don’t you get these pierced? It’d look so fucking good on you.”

     “I might,” I replied.

     “I’ll attach a chain to them and lead you around with it,” he teased as he kissed down over my stomach.

     I tried to hold still and not squirm. I had a feeling he wouldn’t like it. Almost like he was reading my mind, he grabbed my hips with both hands and held me firmly, licking up the underside of my cock as it lay on my stomach. It twitched against his mouth, and I gasped in pleasure. I wanted to cum so fucking bad and I knew he wasn’t going to let me, at least not yet. He gave my cock a couple more licks, then knelt up.

     “Get on your knees,” he ordered.

     I got up, turned to face the headboard, and started to get on my hands and knees.

     “No, get up on your knees, lean back against me. You know, sit in my lap.”

      I did as he asked, kneeling up on my knees and reaching back to grip his hips for leverage. His cock was rock hard, pressing against the crack of my ass and he started thrusting up against me. One of his hands went around my neck and squeezed tightly, the other wrapped around my cock and began to jerk me off.

     “I better never see you flirting with another man again. This is mine!” he emphasized his point by thrusting hard up against me, his cock almost penetrating me. “You hear me, Ben?” he asked, squeezing harder on my throat.

     I reached up with both hands trying to pry his hand off my neck, but it was useless, so I just nodded my head yes.

     “Good boy,” he said, and loosened his grip just a little. He was still holding too tight, and it was hard to draw a good breath.

     I was a little shocked to find that him choking me was turning me on massively. I knew about autoerotic asphyxiation, but I thought it was an urban myth. He stopped jerking me off at that exact moment, and bit down very hard on the spot between my shoulder and my neck on the right side, sucking and breaking the skin with his teeth. My whole body shuddered as he marked me, and I dug my nails into his hips where I was holding on to him.

     “Let somebody else even look at you. I’ll waste them!” Danny growled into my ear.

     “Nobody is looking at me!” I argued.

     “That’s not true, Ben!” Danny hissed. “I saw Ronnie Radke chatting you up earlier today. He's been spreading a rumor around that he intends to turn you out. That's a prison term, Ben. Do you know what it means? It means he wants to fuck you. I warned the other guys about it. We've been looking out for you. That felon so much as breathes on what is mine…”

     “I don’t want Ronnie!” I protested. “I want you!”

     That seemed to placate him, and he let go of my neck and put one hand on my back between my shoulder blades, pushing me forward. I let my weight down on my hands and braced on my forearms. Danny reached under me and slid his thumb over the head of my cock, then left me there on my hands and knees while he slipped the condom on and got the lube.

     “Hold still,” he said.

     I tried to look over my shoulder to see what he was doing and one of his hands disappeared between us. He pushed a finger inside me, and I instantly tensed up. It felt kind of strange; not painful, just weird. He pushed it all the way inside me and began to twist it around. A sudden jolt of white-hot pleasure shot through my groin.

     “What the fuck?” I cried out, my head falling to the mattress.

     “Prostate,” Danny replied. “Haven’t you ever played with your own ass?”

     “Not like this,” I answered a little short of breath. “Do it again, please?”

     Danny chuckled and pushed a second finger inside me. When it hit again, it was twice as strong as before and I literally felt like I was cumming dry. I slid down flat against the mattress, unable to hold myself up. It felt too good, and I just wanted to lay there and let him work on me. Over and over, he drove his fingers against that spot, and I felt like I was going to pass out. He had worked three fingers into me at that point and it was borderline uncomfortable but totally worth it for the intense pleasure that followed. I couldn’t think clearly at that point and when he pulled his fingers out and tugged on my hips, getting me back up on my knees, it took a moment for me to process what was about to happen.

     “Relax, breath, don’t tense up,” Danny warned, and I tried to do what he said.

     Anxiety spiked and I clutched the sheets tightly. He was going slow, easing into me, all seemed to be perfect until the sharp pain hit me, and I lurched forward, pulling away from him.

     “Fuck, that hurts like hell!” I protested. “I can’t do it!”

     “Yeah, you can,” Danny urged, grabbing my hips, and pulling me back. “Don’t run from it. Relax like I told you. People do this all the time. You’ve done girls in the ass before, haven’t you?”

     “No, I never have!” I answered, still trying to pull away from him.

     He tried pushing back inside me again and I panicked for a moment, then he leaned up, resting his chest against my back. He started kissing me between my shoulder blades and licking along the shell of my ear.

     “Ben, give it to me,” he urged. “Relax and take it for me. You can do this.”

     I let out another big breath and braced myself up again. I counted backward from 10 forcing myself to breathe and relax my body completely. He tilted his hips forward and pushed. The sharp jolt of pain hit again but he was ready this time and his arm was around my hips holding me still. I couldn’t get away and had no choice but to take it. I bit down on my lower lip and tasted blood. He pushed against my shoulders and pressed my chest down to the bed, keeping me up on my knees. As he started thrusting into me, I wondered how anybody could ever enjoy this. It was horrible.

      I was trying not to cry. It was that painful. I just wanted it to be done with at that point. But Danny leaned over me again and kissed the back of my neck. His mouth was right against my ear as he began talking to me in that deep, raspy voice.

     “Your mine, Ben. You’ve always been mine from the moment you first started talking to me on Myspace. I wanted you. I was just waiting for the right moment. I had to be sure. I knew you were bisexual at least. I know it hurts. I love how you’re giving it up to me. You feel so fucking good on my cock, so tight. You make me so fucking hard when I watch you play on stage. I love the way you move, how you dance, your smile, the way you blush when someone compliments you. I go into a mad rage when other men look at you. It makes me hard though,  knowing that they want what’s mine. They’ll never fucking get it.”

          I felt my body beginning to respond despite the pain. I started to relax and when he thrust especially hard against me, I got a little jolt of pleasure again. If I could just get positioned exactly right so his cock would hit my sweet spot…

          “Love your body, your cute face, those big, beautiful eyes, that messy hair. Love the way you dress like a teenager. You look so damn young. Fuck, Ben, you turn me on just by breathing! Ronnie wants to rape you. I’ll fuck him up. Nobody touches this but me!”

          His possessive words and compliments were going straight to my cock. I couldn’t help but be turned on by it. Danny knew what he was doing. My arms were starting to shake from holding that position and I went down on my forearms. When I did, it put me in exactly the right position. Danny’s cock hit my prostate and the world went white for a moment.

          “OH FUCK!” I shouted. Pleasure exploded all over my body.

          “I can feel you cumming on my cock!” Danny cried out. “God your so fucking tight, I can feel it. I can feel you cumming…”

          I could feel him cumming inside me too, with each pulse of his cock. It made me feel powerful to know I’d caused that. I slipped down flat against the mattress, and he went with me, his body completely covering mine. It was hard to get a full breath with all his weight on me like that, but it felt good. It felt right.

          “God damn, baby!” Danny laughed, raising up and fluffing his hand through my hair. “I haven’t cum that hard since… Fuck, I’ve never cum that hard!”

          “I’m glad you enjoyed it!” I teased.

          He rolled off me and went to get a washcloth from the bathroom. He tossed one to me so I could wipe the cum off my stomach, then he flopped down beside me on the bed and got us both a fresh cigarette. He would occasionally reach over and brush his fingertips down my stomach as we smoked.

          “Did you like it?” he asked, looking over at me.

          “Took me a minute to get over the pain, but yeah, I loved it,” I answered, feeling myself blushing to have to admit that.

          “I wanted to make it good for you. I had every intention of edging you all night, holding you down, tongue fucking your ass. Oh, I had such grand plans for you, but all the sexual frustration I built up over the last 24 hours or so got the best of me,” he admitted.

          “Damn,” I breathed. “I’m glad you were frustrated, then.”

          Danny smiled and ran his hand through my hair. “Don’t worry, Ben. There’s always tomorrow night.”