Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

    Darlin loved the way Sam’s care showed in everything he touched. In the way he patted Frederick’s truck door, twice before seeing his progeny off. In the gesture of holding his front door open for her. Through the gentle crease in Sam’s eyes when he gave a gruff smile about needing to ensure she ate something. The careful question of asking to take her coat. 

     A part of her felt cruel for not handing it to him. But she was about to hand herself to him if Sam kept speaking to her like that.

     Darlin cursed herself. What was wrong with her? She didn’t know how much more she could take before she launched herself at Sam and never let go. Darlin stomped snow off her boots in the entry.

    She smiled softly in the mirror above Sam’s keys. Fresh powder had already melted off her hair. Not that it mattered Her chopped bob cut around her jawline had been white ever since her shift had manifested at eleven.

     Darlin paused.

     She was smiling.

     How often had she been doing that lately? Her grin fell, and the scar etched through the left side of her lips returned to its familiar shape. She'd been letting herself smile more. And Darlin didn't know if that was a good thing yet. She wanted it to be a good thing.

     “Hot cocoa again, Darlin?”

     The first time he'd shown Darlin his place, he'd offered her a drink. And Sam had said he was sure all his hot chocolate packets were expired. She’d teased back that she’d take it, since it was the most dangerous choice.

     He’d stocked up on hot chocolate the next day. And the thought made Darlin smile.

     Curse this vamp. He had more power than he had the right to.

     “I do like to live dangerously.” Darlin replied before sliding her boots off. She stared at her fuzzy socks for a moment.

     She should keep them on. The floorboards were cold.

     But Darlin found herself with one hand on the wall and the other working the camo design wool off her feet. A recent gift from David.

     Darlin hung her heavy jacket and made her way to the tall living space. Sam’s kitchen cut diagonally across the living room with barstools and a counter. Years of his photography filled the walls. One was packed deep with shelves on photography, magic, medical anatomy, and a dirty western romance she couldn't tease Sam about without revealing she knew exactly what was inside it. Snowdrifts flapped against the windows overlooking the forest on her right. A little piano took up the rug beside them.

     Her favorite part of Sam’s home was…well, besides Sam, was the fireplace that filled the center of the room. Like a wall had grown itself just wide enough to fit the roaring hearth and let the open floor exist around it.

     Darlin glanced toward the couch, stopping when she saw how pushed back it was. Thick blankets and plush pillows piled in front of the fireplace.

     “Redecorating?” Darlin asked as Sam approached with two mugs.

     “Considerin’ your mad need for cuddlin,” Sam smiled, “I thought this would be nice.”

     Darlin let a grin pinch one side of her face. “Is that your heart I hear speeding up again?”

     “Oh hush.” Sam huffed, handing her a big teal mug.

     “Thank you.” Darlin sipped on the rim. “Not just for the cocoa, but for having me over tonight.”

     Sam nodded. “I don’t care how thick your fur is, it’s too cold for anyone rushing home when a storm is on its way.”

     “You let Frederick and Bright drive home.” Darlin countered.

     “Well they’re faster than you.” Sam wrinkled his nose.

     Darlin feigned a gasp. “Was that a challenge?”

     “Oh here we go again.” Sam rubbed the exhaustion down his face. Darlin hid her stubborn smile behind the chocolate. The steam thawed the cold on her cheeks and burned the back of her tongue, but she still guzzled it down. Faster than normal.

     There was a thick knot of emotion lurking at the back of her throat, and she didn’t know what it was. It was making it hard to breathe around Sam. Tonight was the first night she’d slept over since...

     Since Sam had survived the Inversion.

     S he’d lived with him for two weeks after that day. But, she didn’t know what he wanted. And she knew she wanted him. So she did what she did best.

     Darlin ran until she knew what she fighting. But whatever was kicking around in her chest along with her desire for Sam, she didn't know how to fight it. Because she loved him. And respected him. And didn't want to ruin that. She'd already ruined her past relationship with the pack, and she didn't want to ruin what she had with Sam.

     Everything else inside her was so twisted and confused, she couldn't let herself dwell on it. Darlin swallowed the knot down with the dregs of her drink. Setting the mug aside, Darlin threw her anxious energy into stretching her arms overhead.

     Sam caught the hitch in her breath before Darlin could hide it.

     “It’s nothing…”

     “Darlin.” Sam warned.

     “It’s just some bruises. I asked Asher to spar with me as part of getting back into shape for the business. I don’t want to let the pack…”

     Her voice drifted off as Sam considered her. With his all knowing gaze and ever gruff frown. She flexed her knuckles and prepared to fight his always triumphant argument for her wellbeing.

     “Sit with me?” Sam said in a voice that was far too tender.

     Darlin blinked, taking in the man in front of her. His stern brow and soft silver eyes. A notch in his nose that gave him a distinguished profile, something that would separate him without help from his heart melting accent. And those wide lips. That would smile and call her Darlin and ask her questions that made her feel…

     Safe.

     Loved.

     Secure.

     Strong.

     Happy.

      Mate .

     The word rang in her gut.

     Her core, her whole being, wanted so viciously to call Sam her’s. Her mate. To be his. But…she didn’t…it was too fast…he wanted…

     “Darlin?” Sam asked. Concern coated his firm desire for a response. 

     “Please.” Darlin murmured. 

     She didn’t know what she was asking for. He took her hand, the comforting rough texture of his thumb climbing every scar.

      “Can I see?”

      Darlin dropped her gaze to the pillows. “Can we sit first? Like we did at the solstice party?”

      Sam’s smile was her lifeline. “Course.” He settled himself on the floor against the couch, open arms ready to hold her between his legs and press her back into his chest.

      “May I?”

      “Please.”

      Sam held her softly, careful of her ribs while still securing her to him. He pressed a kiss against her neck.

      Darlin tilted her head, whimpering under her breath when his warm lips left her skin. Sam brushed her short hair back to kiss below her jaw. She sighed, failing miserably to hide the want in her moan as his breath shuddered against her skin.

      Sam’s grip tightened. Not painfully. Almost…she dared to hope protectively. A lustful part of her begged it to be possessively.  He stared over her shoulder into the logs crackling by their feet. 

      “Darlin…”

      “Sam…”

      They paused, Darlin twisting as she began to spew apologies for interrupting him. “You go first…”

      “No, Darlin. I want to hear you…”

      “No.” Darlin pressed. She rested a hand on his chest, not understanding how her voice fell to a whisper. “I can feel your heart beating so fast.”

      Sam dropped his gaze down to her fingers massaging against his shirt. He swallowed. “I…I have two questions. But, Darlin. I want to hear your thoughts after I ask my first one.”

      “Al…alright.”

      Sam hesitated before meeting her eyes.

      Darlin twisted a little more to face him fully, one hand on the floor outside of his hip, still close enough for his arms to circle her.

      “Darlin?”

      “Sam?”

      “What does it mean to be a mate?”

      The question liquified any coherent thought Darlin had. She stared. Sam darted his eyes up to her. “I…I…wanted to know…”

      “Why?”

      Sam fidgeted. It felt like he couldn’t decide whether or not to grip her tighter or to let go.

      Darlin nearly whimpered again when he let go.

      “I…suppose, it’s ‘cause…it's what Asher called you. He…called you my mate. And, I know it’s…kinda like marriage. Where you choose it. And that we hadn’t discussed that, any real title for what we were because you’re so wonderful and takin my slow heart into account.”

      “You don’t need to apologize for having a heart that needs time.” Darlin murmured, splaying her hand softly over his chest. “I’d wait forever for you.”

      Sam was frozen. Darlin brushed her fingers gently up and down his arm, waking him with breaths that hinted that he craved the strokes of her against him.

      “But…I ask, ‘cause…I hear that being a mate is something that can happen without decidin. That spending time with someone and building a relationship can lead to a bond…that…”

      “You’re asking if we’re mates.”

      “Yes…” Sam inhaled. “Because I want to be.”

      Darlin forgot how to breathe. Closeness had always scared her before. Closeness had always meant danger for someone else. But she wanted Sam too.

      “But…” Sam cringed, “I…I don’t want to ruin a bond I could have with you by failing to meet the expectations of it. I've read into it, but a lot of the werewolf texts William lent me are...well...ancient. And, I didn't want to check one out from DAMN."

     She didn't comment on how he hesitated bringing up the campus. He'd fearlessly run errands for the Solaire Clan to settle things with the Department and DAMN. But they'd eaten up so many of his nights. She knew it strained him to be so close to that place after the Inversion, but she hadn't forced him to say why.

     "So I wanted to ask you. But, I’m…still not ready for…certain things.” Sam blew out his cheeks, “Like…well…matin, for example. I don’t know if we have to do that to be mates, and I don’t know…”

      The laugh that burst out of Darlin shocked them both.

      Darlin slapped a hand over her mouth. “I…I’m so sorry…”

      “No.” Sam chuckled. “I love seeing you that way, with that smile.”

      Darlin blushed, burying her face in her hand. “Geez, Sam. I’m sorry. Here you are, trying to be serious with me and here I am laughing.”

      Sam shrugged. “Well, I already knew you didn’t pick up any of David’s manners.”

      Darlin scoffed, pushing his shoulder softly. 

      “I…well,” Sam laughed, rubbing the back of his neck, “Darlin, the way that the other wolves in your pack look at their mates. I feel like that. When I look at you. And that bond sounds just about like the only thing that would describe what I feel with you.”

      Sam glanced down. “Can I take your hands?”

      Darlin rested them in his palms. She didn’t remember the last time she gave herself to someone without hesitating. 

      “I…well. I’ve never had what I have, with anyone but you. And if that is what this is, I want to be sure I’m doing it right for you.”

      “The only thing you have to do,” Darlin rubbed her thumb over his, “to be my mate, is to be you.”

      Sam paused.

      Darlin’s smile grew. “A mating bond, it’s something that…grows, within two people’s cores. It’s a connection specific to each of them, and it’s built from both sides."

     He was the only person she knew that looked at her like that. Like Sam valued everything she said. She wanted to say it right.

     "There’s no other expectation than you, Sam.”

      Darlin rested her head against his. He sighed against her touch. “And I want you.” Darlin whispered.

      “So…I…I would call you my mate?”

      Darlin couldn’t stop the tear sliding down. “Yes.” She kissed his knuckles. “I’d be your mate. And you’d be mine.”

      Sam’s smile demolished any worry. “Can I?”

      Darlin nodded into the kiss. Soft and sensual and full of care that only Sam could manage. She could taste the salt of her tears on his lips. But Darlin slowly sank her lips into his, tasted him deep, and tugged on his mouth as she slipped out before they’d kiss again.

      “My mate.” Sam kissed her.

      Darlin’s heart rate stopped and then sped away as she felt the bond echo between them.

      “There…”

      Kiss.

      “Was one…”

      Longer kiss.

      Darlin was losing control of her tongue and ability to speak. Her words slurred against his lips. “There was one thing…” Darlin sucked in a deep breath, “About…being mates, that I would want to do.”

      Sam leaned back, hands still laced in her’s. “Yes?”

      “I…well. Wolves, we…when we have mates, one of the first things is…to shift for the other.”

      Sam stared. Darlin’s heart squeezed. “And I don’t mean it in a weird way. Or in a way to exclude you. You don’t have to be a wolf to be my mate. And I know you’ve already seen my wolf form but…”

     “Darlin.” Sam stopped her. His hand slid up to her jaw, cupping her cheek. Darlin leaned into his touch. “This is important to you. It’s not weird. Please, tell me more about it.”

      Darlin nodded. “Well, I want to shift…specifically for you. No other eyes. No other reasons. I want to shift for you.” Darlin wondered what was hotter, the fire on her back or the blush beating her cheeks. “We could go for a hunt. Or…well, I would just want to cuddle. And it could be for as long or short as you like.”

     She was ruining this. She knew she was. Darlin should have thought this through more. She had never tried to be close like this. Intimate like this. And she was tripping over herself like a pup…

      “I understand that. Making it special.” Sam rubbed a strand of her hair in his fingers.

      “Can I do that?” Darlin asked. “Shift for you?”

      “And that would make us mates?”

      “We…we already are. But this is something I want to do for my mate. Show you, all of me. And show that all of me is for you.”

      Sam’s eyes narrowed. Darlin was afraid he’d say no. But he only nodded, and what she thought had been scrutiny had been highly dialed in affection. Darlin hated that she was still getting used to affection.

      He kissed her forehead. “Can I heal your side before you shift?”

      “Yes. But let me take my sweater off. It’s one less layer to phase through…Are you alright with that?”

      Darlin wondered why she felt so panicky asking that. Sam had seen her with nearly nothing on when he healed her before. They weren’t going to do anything. But, she wanted to be sure he was alright with it.

      “Your choice. I don’t mind.”

      Darlin’s relief oozed out of her smile. A quick thought captured her. “Alright. But, before I do…what was the second thing you were going to ask me?”

      Something ignited in Sam’s eyes. His nostrils flared. 

      But he kept his mouth in a fine line. “It’s nothing. I want to focus on this gift.” His voice lowered to a murmur. “I understand it’s a gift.”

      Darlin hoped she could convey how much that meant to her.

      But she could sense it. That connection between them. Darlin had bad experiences with bridging. But this felt like a softer hint of a connection. And not like their cores were intertwined. Just a waiting hand, like his magic was ready and letting her know he was there.

      Mate.

      “Alright.” Darlin whispered brushing a light kiss on his lips.

      Sam nodded. His eyes didn’t leave her as she slowly rose to her feet. She was going to need more space. It was a good thing Sam had pushed the couch farther back from the fireplace. Darlin glanced over her shoulder. 

      “Do you mind me watchin?” Sam asked.

      “It’s just my sweater.” Darlin snorted. A piece of her still paused as she hooked her hands on the bottom hem. Scars. She’d worn a large sweater to cover her skin. She didn’t care who saw. Darlin usually paraded them around. But…with the pack and Sam…Each rough edge and uneven muscle felt a little less like badges of honor when they were smothering her in the desire to not let her earn anymore.

     “You can watch…I… I like it.”

      Sam waited reverently. Darlin inhaled. She was proud of her scars. And Sam had never shied from them. She stared at the kicking flames, felt the fabric rush up her face, and then she could see the fire again.

      It was warm inside Sam’s cabin, but the chill still seized at her exposed skin. 

      Darlin heard Sam stand. She stared down. Just a tank top over broad, ruined shoulders. Her leggings hugged the dented wounds that carved up her legs.

      “Can I touch?” Sam whispered in Darlin’s ear.

      She watched as the firelight bounced on her body. Flicker along the outline of Sam’s strong hands gripping her waist. 

      He kissed her neck again, and Darlin swore his lips sucked for the briefest moment of pure joy. She openly whimpered as his fingers slipped beneath her tank top. When they found the bruises.

      Sam growled, as if her pain insulted him. He brushed healing magic into her left ribs. Darlin’s breath hitched as Sam moved to stand at her shoulder. His mouth found the front of her jugular. He'd kiss. Then mend. Kiss again. More magic. Another kiss. Sam healed the bruises on her hand. The coloring sank into the canvas of her skin.

      Whimpering.

      Growling.

      Fingers on skin.

      Fingers itching for the hem of her leggings.

      Darlin shut her eyes. He slid his fingers just barely below her waistband. Healed a bruise. 

      And then he was kneeling in front of her, healing just above her abdomen with a kiss that sent goosebumps up her body. Panic seized her spine. She had so many bites down there. So many of Quinn’s…

      “Can I shift for you now?” Darlin asked quickly. She was being ridiculous. Sam knew her past.

      Darlin shivered at the way he looked up at her. There was a gate they’d blown open by calling each other mates. She saw it in his eyes. But he just watched her. The way his hand slid softly down her right thigh. Darlin waited for him to take her right then and there. The impulsive part of her didn't mind.

    “Any other bruises?”

     But Maybe Sam had better control of his emotions than she did. She’d forgotten he’d asked to heal her.  How did he know she had a bruise there? It was like he knew when her blood was where it shouldn’t be. Like he was drawn to her injuries.

     “Just that last one. You don’t need to worry about every scratch. I’m not fragile.”

      Sam obeyed, his hand rubbing the sore spot he’d found on the outside of her leg. She rested herself back onto the floor, bunching up a plush white comforter. His hand didn’t leave her thigh. Sam adjusted himself between her legs. Only the flicker in Darlin’s eyes hinted into the pain underneath his hand. 

     “ 'Pologies.” Sam sank his healing magic deep into her muscles. Darlin swallowed a moan.

     She dropped her head back onto the couch, feeling the fire warm her neck. “Thank you.” Shift first. Shift first, and then ask Sam what his other question was. He’d already agreed to officially be her mate. She didn’t need to throw herself at him for anything else. He wanted to wait. And she respected him too much to not give him that. 

     Darlin dropped her head back down. Sam was relaxed on his knees, waiting with his fingers on the edge of the blanket.

     “I won’t be able to talk, but one of anything is no, and two is yes. I won’t stay shifted too long, so I can talk with you about your other question.”

     Sam only nodded, the weight of his gaze more enveloping than the blanket on her skin.

     Darlin shut her eyes. She inhaled deep. Let the breath fill out her lungs. And then she exhaled.

     Her body changed with the magical sound of unfolding muscle and fur. She curled her limbs as they grew and joints changed, making sure she was now lying on her side so that she didn’t crush Sam. The sensation was like stretching after being cramped in a suitcase. Being in her wolf form was another reminder of how powerful her body was. Of how powerful she was. Darlin was proud of her wolf.

     So why was it so nerve wracking to show Sam? Stop caring so much! Darlin demanded of herself.

     The blanket fell off of her animal spine. Darlin flicked her tail shyly as she stared down her black nose at Sam. The couch was dwarfed next to her. She’d hardly fit on a king size mattress in her wolf form. What if Sam thought she was too big? Milo’s size was perfect for cuddling with his mate. Darlin had seen it at the solstice. She'd always found his size advantageous for hunting some animals and in pack games. Right now, she envied his smaller compact power a little more.

     But Sam erased any doubt.

     “I didn’t realize how beautiful you are.” 

     Darlin’s ears pricked up. 

     She was all white fur, grey speckling stroked into her coat. But among it all were the pink scars that interrupted the pattern. Only a few were deep enough to keep more fur from growing, but it wasn’t hard to tell where some raised lumps or carved valleys into her skin.

     Darlin huffed once.

     Sam grinned. “No no no, Darlin. You’re beautiful. You’re evidence of every fight you’ve ever taken part in, and won. May I come closer?”

     Darlin nipped softly at his hand twice, licking his fingers.

     He buried his hands in her thick fur. Darlin’s eyes rolled back into her head when Sam started working deep circles into her side. 

     Lolling her head to the rug, Darlin whined for more rubs. Sam searched down her long neck to her jaw, scratching below her jowls.

     “Feel good?”

     Darlin beat her tail against him twice.

     “Some mighty predator you are.” Sam chuckled.

     A growl slipped past her fangs, indignant rage flaring in her eyes. Sam raised his hands in cocky surrender. She only forgave him when he returned his hands to rubbing down her shoulders.

     “Can I lay with you?”

     Darlin flicked her head up. Sam froze at the sudden energy there. And then he was laughing into her chest as she leapt up and pinned him underneath her. 

      Some mighty vamp he is. Darlin huffed into his face.

     She settled all her weight softly onto him, tucking her clawed limbs and rumbling against him so he felt how happy she was. Sam grabbed fistfuls of her fur and adjusted her to his side. He was quick to turn her thick coat into a pillow.

     Darlin breathed softly against his hair, rubbing her foreleg against his arm.

     “You don’t gotta massage me.” Sam laughed. “They’ll be time later for that. Right now, I just want to hold you.” Darlin let his hands roam and cling to her. She realized with a comforting sigh that Sam seemed to enjoy holding her just as much as he enjoyed it when she rubbed up and down his arms.

     “I knew you were big, but Darlin’, you’re downright glorious. I feel bad for the two vamps who thought they could take you on.”

     She nipped happily at his ear.

     “From what I’ve seen, you’re the only white wolf in the pack, right?” 

     She nodded twice. 

     “One of a kind.” He grinned. “I love your color." 

     A lonely pang in her chest was instantly replaced with gratitude. Darlin was going to have to tell Sam how much that meant. Before she’d moved into the Shaw pack, she’d loved her coat too. The Mortimer Pack in Washington had vastly been grey and white wolves. 

     But when she’d moved to Dahlia, she’d been the only light one. The closest had been Asher’s amber coat with white marks or Christian’s chestnut blonde fur. Her coloring was worlds away from David, with his swaths of black and deep leather toned fur. Or Milo who reminded her of redwood trees. And mafia suits, with his accent ever present in their telepathic links.

     She’d been a patch of snow in Autumn, and she’d felt even more alone.

     And Sam, who’s favorite season was never used to label her coat, was telling her he loved it.

     Darlin snuggled tighter to him. 

     “You better be careful. You’re making the blankets jealous, I don’t think I’ll ever use them again.”

     She huffed out her approval. Sam met her gaze. She dipped her muzzle to look at him fully. He kissed her nose and rested his head against the fur between her eyes.

     Darlin’s heart nearly broke as she realized how relaxed he was. It was such a rare moment of peace for him. Sam scratched deep behind her ears, and she encouraged him. All his practiced massages trailed underneath her jaw, and that’s where she realized she was in trouble.

     She whined out desperately, flopping hopelessly and exposing more of her neck.

     Sam laughed. “That your weak spot?”

     Darlin wriggled twice and nipped his hand. His smile glowed as he hunted down patches of her neck, working his fingers in deep. Darlin writhed on her back and begged for more, nearly crushing him when she saw how rested and content he seemed.

     She wanted to howl and cry and run and stay glued to his side.

     Happy.

     She made her mate happy.

     A sly part of her remembered his weak spot too though. Darlin bit at his collar. "Hey what are you..." She snorted a breath onto his collarbone and tugged, until the first few buttons undid themselves. Darlin nested their broad head against his chest. If she had her other mouth, she’d make him writhe just as much as he was making her. His neck and shoulders were like live wires for him. Later, maybe.

     “Alright, hold on.” Sam unbuttoned his flannel and tossed it aside. Darlin made sure not to drool at the light warming his skin. That deep chasmlike scar cut down across his chest and ribs. Darling flicked her tongue at his old wound. He pushed her away with a laugh. “I will tickle you if you try anything.”

     Darlin wrinkled her muzzle in a teasing growl. Sensitive. But it was another comforting reminder. He didn’t mind her seeing his scars. 

     His heart and hands were a steady rhythm, a sure and calm force beside her. Darlin vowed in that moment to ensure he’d be ever at peace, even if she’d have to stay in her wolf form to do so.

     Sam’s hand rubbed her jugular.

     And then he frowned.

     Darlin whipped her head up, ears at full attention as she tried to understand the sudden tension in Sam’s brow. Whimpers leaked past her canines.  She’d done something to upset him. She’d ruined his few moments of bliss. She’d…

     “It’s alright.” Sam whispered. “It’s alright.”

     Darlin didn’t believe him. She gave an exaggerated look up and down her body several times. 

     “Can I hold you a little longer?” Sam whispered.

     Darlin licked his cheek twice, curling her body so that he could melt into her side.

     They stared into the fire, Sam brushing absentminded fingers up and down her foreleg. Darlin worried over the hundred and one things she could have done to upset him. Maybe she should have suggested a telepathic link. But she wasn’t very gifted with magic outside of communicating with the pack.

     She lost track of how long they lay there. The logs were going to need to be refreshed soon, the flames going dimmer and dimmer over the coals. She was glad her coat was keeping him warm. He was too lost in thought for Darlin to try and pantomime that he could put his shirt back on.

     “I’m such a coward.” Sam cursed. Turning over, he rubbed behind Darlin’s ears. “I…I’m too scared to ask you when you’re not shifted.”

     Darlin flicked one ear. It was still her either way, she wasn’t sure why it mattered.

     “Darlin, I…I…”

     His grip on her was so tight.

     “I wanted to ask if…”

     His heart was thunder against her.

     “I want to bite you.”

Chapter Text

     “I want to bite you.”

     The confession gushed out of his lungs. Darlin stared, eyes wide as he said it with so much desire and shame she’d wondered how it hadn’t broken him already.

     Sam let go when he felt her go rigid. “I’m sorry for asking. I shouldn’t have suggested…”

     Darlin shifted back, pulling the blanket onto her lap when her fur couldn’t keep her from the cold. “Sam.” Darlin took his hand before he could retreat. “You didn’t upset me,” Darlin consoled him, “Just surprised me.”

     Sam couldn’t meet her eyes.

     “Why are you afraid to ask that?” Darlin asked. “Please, I want to understand.”

     “I don’t want to shame you into saying yes…”

     “Sam.”

     He hesitantly met her gaze. She waited.

     “It’s just…” Sam sighed heavily. “I was thinking about all those bites on you. Well, I’ve been thinking about claiming you for a while, but then…”

     Darlin paused. He was waiting for her to interrupt him. To tell him off. Darling crossed her arms. “And?”

     She froze when tears welled in his eyes. “So much…so much has happened. When I think about…wanting to claim you…all I can think about is…”

    Sam hid his face until Darlin brushed her thumb across his stubble. He sucked in a breath. “Calling you my mate… Darlin, you don’t know how happy that makes me. Having something that shows people what we are to each other. But, then I start to think too much.”

     “About what?”

     “Quinn’s stupid blood bond with you.” Sam growled. “Makes me furious. That he’s allowed to have some sort of connection with you. It makes me jealous. And then I want to claim you, so that he and every other filthy thing that ever tries to harm you, knows they’d have to go through me.”

     Tears rolled slowly down his face. Sam twisted to hold her wrist, kissing her palm. “And then I worry. About what a future with you looks like…Because…After seeing Vincent have to turn his partner, I think about how they had something I never had.”

     Darlin watched him fall apart. Something he didn’t have?

     Sam shuddered, trying to draw a full breath. “Just, that promise and consent to be together forever.”

      Oh. Darlin thought with one stricken beat. Sam had stayed with Vincent to support the turning. He’d watched two people agree to something he’d never been given the opportunity to agree to.

     “And I think about Frederick, how I gave him that choice too. And as bitter as I am that I didn’t have that choice, I want you to know that you always have that choice.” Sam gripped her wrist, meeting her gaze fervently. “You have that choice.”

     “I know that.” Darlin said. “One of the most amazing things you’ve given me is a choice, Sam.”

     He blinked tears out of his eyes. “I just…I spend too much time thinking about all that, because I don’t want to turn you. Which is a ridiculous thing to think about when we’ve barely just agreed to be mates. I promise, I just want to bite you, but I don’t know what you’ll say.”

     Sam bowed his head. “And I feel like a monster for even considering just doing it without asking…”

     Darlin took in the rush of emotions that he’d kept inside since the Inversion. The first time she’d ever seen him cry was when she’d held him, collapsing to their knees on that campus field.

     If Sam hadn’t been there, Asher would have died. Darlin knew that much. David would have been alone with Asher’s body. If Sam hadn’t been there, Vincent would have been in such a panic. She’d had a brief moment with William’s progeny as he thanked her for staying with Sam following the Inversion. That he’d been Vincent’s rock.

     If Sam hadn’t been there, so much would have gone wrong.

     Darlin felt she hadn’t deserved Vincent’s gratitude. She’d just wanted to be with Sam. She was being selfish. And here Sam was, apologizing for wanting her like she’d wanted him.

     And she’d only guessed at what Sam had been feeling. To support so many people in all that chaos. To witness someone being turned, in a loving way, when he hadn’t had that. Darlin didn’t know how she’d feel about being turned. She loved being a wolf. But that was such a far off question, it didn’t really bother her. And it wasn’t something she wanted to dwell on right now.

     “Sam. Sam.” She scooted closer, wrapping her arms around him. He smelled like earth and leather. He clung to her. “You’re alright. I don’t mind you asking.”

     “I just…I just think…thinking about other vamp’s fangs in you, I got so furious I…I…I thought about Quinn’s stupid blood bond with you and I…” Sam shook his head, “I got angry. And then jealous. And then angry all over again at someone ever hurting you without knowing they’d have to answer to me. And I circle all over again.”

     Darlin smiled softly. Sam’s irritated rage was strangely comforting, once she understood why. 

     “You think too much.” She whispered in his ear.

     That made his quiet tears ease up. “You don’t think enough.”

     “I think you’re wonderful.”

     Sam chuckled, squeezing her tight before relaxing out of her hug. Darlin watched him collect himself as much as he could, wiping at his eyes and trying to ease his breathing.

     “I…I don’t mind you biting me.”

     Sam froze.

     Darlin shrugged. “I don’t know much about claiming, can you explain that to me?”

     He was staring at her like he’d never seen her before. Darlin let his thoughts tumble, pulling her blanket over her shoulders as the cold continued.

     Sam paused. He cursed and snapped his fingers, magic pulling more flames into the hearth. 

     She loved the little things he did like that.

     “You’re…you’re sure?”

     “You let me shift for you. And claiming sounds like what you want to do in return.” Darling chewed the scar on her lip. “Quinn…he…I don’t know if he claimed me the way that you’re meaning. He never really…would explain it…to me. But, please understand that I know you’re not him. And I trust you.”

     Sam's eyes flooded with an emotion Darlin had had to relearn. Love.

     “Now, are you going to continue sobbing like a little girl, or are you going to explain it to me.” Darlin sniffed, trying to be more smug. Sam huffed, knowing exactly what she was doing.

     “Well, claiming, it’s just a bite. But it would mark you as mine.”

     Darlin nodded. “I want to be yours.”

     Sam shuddered, and Darlin recognized the horrible wanting in his eyes. She drew in a deep breath. She could handle another scar. She could take more pain. It was for him. And she could do it. Vampires had taken her blood before…Wait. Blood. When was the last time she’d seen Sam feed on bags?

     “What’s wrong?” Sam asked.

     “Sam…” All this time, he was always careful to make sure she ate. She’d never considered. “Oh Sam, are you hungry?”

     He sighed, bone deep. “I…yes.” He admitted. “But that’s not why I want to do this.”

     “Yes, you can bite me.”

     “R…really?”

     “Yes.”

     She saw him hesitate. All his desire twitch in his arms. Darlin grabbed him and pulled. Sam had her against the couch, his mouth seizing her lips and refusing to let go. Darlin forgot the blanket. She wasn’t going to need it to be warm now.

     Sam was on her lap. Darlin gripped his arms, welcoming the heat and strength as he worked her lips over. As they kissed away the taste of tears and replaced it with the color flaring across their skin. He tasted fast and he tasted hard. All his hesitations were being crushed between their lips as they panted and grabbed at each other. 

     Bites were always best this way. Fast and hot. Like getting a piercing.

     Darlin rolled her hips under him. Sam growled and tangled a hand in her hair, returning the pressure and riding her. She gasped out, moaning into his teeth and begging for more. However much he wanted, she trusted. 

     Sam had to pull his bottom lip out from her canines. Darlin groaned as he burned hot kisses against her jawline. Down her neck. She pushed her body against his mouth. 

     “You can bite as hard as you need. The scar doesn’t bother me…”

     “Wait.” Sam’s tongue sucked off her pulse. He tilted her chin to meet his gaze, something serious overtaking the passion he’d tackled her with. “Say that again?”

     “The scar doesn’t bother me.”

     “Darlin.” He panted. “You know I’d never mark you like that.”

     Darlin tilted her head. “I…I don’t think I understand. What kind of mark then?”

     Sam’s thumb brushed her throat. Darlin ran her fingers up and down the muscles along his arms. He was slowing down. Breathing fuller. Watching her with an expression she didn’t understand. 

     “Did…did I do something wrong?”

     “What? No.” Sam insisted, still holding her. “I…I should’ve explained better. That this kind of mark…it…wouldn’t…”

      The logs popped during his quiet search for an answer. Each second was full of his eyes gently taking her in.

     “It wouldn't, what?” Darlin asked.

     “I wouldn’t let it hurt. And I wouldn’t maul you. A claim is just a magical kind of marker, like leaving my scent on you.”

     Darlin furrowed her brow. “It wouldn’t hurt?”

     “Do…do you want it to?”

     “I…” Her eyes widened. Did she? She didn’t know. Bites just always had. “What will it feel like if it doesn’t hurt?”

     Sam kissed her cheek. “You’re my mate. How do you want it to feel?”

     The tug inside her chest when Sam called her his mate. She wanted that forever.

     “My mate?” Darlin whispered.

     “Yes.”

     “I want it to feel like that.” She closed her eyes. “That pull I have toward you when you call me that.”

    Sam released a sigh. He rested his forehead against hers. “It won’t hurt. I promise you that.”

Darlin could only gasp at the sincere honesty burning through them. “I would never hurt you. You’re my mate. I would never let it hurt…”

     He fell into her mouth. The mad need to taste each other had dimmed into the need to communicate how much each cared. 

     Darlin surrendered to him. Let him feed off her kiss. Let him hunt down her throat. She could feel the deep press of his tongue on her jugular. But it wasn’t intense and pounding. He was savoring her. He was rocking up and down on her lap, gently like a wave. Darlin bowed and bent against him, wrapping her arms around him so their chests were pressed tight. 

     It was such a different kind of heat. A different kind of want. He’d started with a firework. Intense and sudden. But now he was igniting something that wasn’t going to burn out anytime soon.

    Sam ran his thumb up her cheek. Across the shape of her lips and the scar that went through both. He captured her hair behind her ear, combing it back to expose the left side of her neck. He kissed her like he healed her. 

     Warm.

     Deep.

     Thorough.

     Caring.

     “Can I?”

     Darlin gasped, tapping his shoulder twice. She could feel his fangs as he smiled against her skin. 

     “You tell me if you want me to stop.”

     “I won’t.”

     “Breathe in, and then breathe out.”

     Darlin followed the rhythm off his bare chest against her.

     “Thank you.”

     His hand was kneading into her back, the other cradling her head. Darlin breathed in deep.

     Sam bit down.

     Ecstasy didn’t compare. She exhaled, never knowing she could make such a desperate moan of pleasure until she felt his fangs slide into her neck. 

     Agony wasn’t the right word. It didn’t hurt. But the sensation was just as potent. It was wild bliss. Unlocking all the tension she stored away and softening anything that hurt. The initial puncture numbed. It fed into a web of pleasure coursing from his fangs. Flowered and melted into every fiber of her being until all of her was just pulsing burning heat.

     Like he was tearing her apart and putting her together again.

     Sam rumbled against her throat. She mewled and whimpered and choked out in wanting. His lips suctioned against her pulse, sucking and sucking and sucking as the bite throbbed. And then he released it slightly to let her blood flow.

     His breath was hot on her throat. Darlin rubbed her hips against his, their bodies pushing in time with his swallows.

     She felt his fangs begin to slide out completely.

     “Wai…wai…wait. You…you can keep going…”

     “Darlin…”

     “Please…”

     He bit down again, and then he bit down deeper. Darlin dug her nails into his back, gasping as Sam enveloped her senses in pleasure.

     His starving growls were flooding her ears. She wanted more. She wanted that strength and bliss igniting her veins. Her heart rocketed in time with his. How could he be so respectful and so infuriatingly passionate at the same time?

     Sam panted as he unclamped his jaw. Darlin clung to him, shaking and moaning as he held her. Kisses pressed into the bites. She felt magic soothe the broken skin over. He kissed her again before leaning back. 

     Darlin swallowed, chest heaving against his.

     “How do you feel?” Sam asked, pressing his forehead against hers.

     Darlin moaned and held on to him. “That was…” All she could do was murmur out her pleasure.

      “I’m glad you liked it.” Sam laughed, kissing the top of her hair. “I didn’t want to be rough…”

      “You weren’t.” She stroked her fingers through his hair. “You weren’t.”

      “Good. There’s other times for that. But this…I wanted this to be…”

      He pressed her softly against the couch, his thrumming heartbeat in her ears and warmth seeping through the blanket.

      “You make me so happy.” Darlin whispered into his neck. 

      The sound that left Sam made Darlin angry. The way he inhaled, as if he hadn’t known. Or he didn’t deserve.

       She rubbed her fingers up and down the muscles in his arms, corded like rope. His breathing always changed when she did that. 

      “Darlin, you’re shiverin.”

      She stretched languidly, letting her stomach press into his when she arched and pushed her hands overhead. “You wouldn’t know anyone I can cuddle with to fix that, would you?”

      “How do you want to do it?” 

      Darlin took in the warmth smiling in his eyes. She held his jaw and stroked her thumb along the stubble. “I want to be able to hold you.”

      The familiar texture of his fingers up her scars. “You should put something on then…”

      Darlin eyed Sam’s flannel. Thick and heavy with the scent of him. She scooped it up and slid it along her arms. “Is this alright?”

      Sam kissed below her ear as she buttoned up the black stitching. “I don’t ever want to see you wearing something that isn’t mine again.”

      Suddenly her fingers couldn’t remember how to button anything anymore. He sucked and kissed her neck reverently and helped her finish buttoning it.

     She wondered if she’d fit into a pair of his Levi’s.

     That nearly led to a long series of dark sensual thoughts, like drowning in chocolate that she’d been told she couldn’t have.

      She secured her arms around Sam’s back. He turned her so that the fire would hit her first. Darlin smiled and snuggled up against his chest. The collar of his shirt brushed her jaw. 

      “So…I smell like you now?”

      “Frederick and Bright will have questions, we’ll leave it at that.”

      Darlin breathed him in. “You smell like…Earth. Leather. Old paper..” She inhaled deep. “And mint.” She exhaled and stroked his arms. “I love it.”

      His legs tangled in hers until their hips were pressed tight. Darlin lifted her gaze to his. “How did I taste?”

      Sam’s fangs glinted as he smiled. “Like a force of nature. Heavy and powerful and deep, like a snowstorm. But…so hot.” Sam murmured and kissed her lips.

     Humming a proud note, Darlin listened to the rasp of her fingers on his arms. The storm whipped up outside. Their bond settled throughout the house and Sam pulled the blanket over them to contain the warmth. Darlin didn’t hide a laugh when he commented that the plush didn’t compare to her. She told him he was right for once. Sam nipped her ear. She kissed his collarbone. They tumbled into more heated kisses.

     And the pair of mates fell asleep, with the firelight low and smiles unashamedly seen.