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Chapter Text

It wasn't pleasant, standing there in the full sun, salty air on my skin, footsteps behind me echoed off of the cobblestone path which winded toward the palace - that small island off the shore of New Asgard. Unique, breathtaking, beautiful. Otherworldly. Those were the words which described the palace sitting upon that small island; gold iridescent spires shooting into the sky, it's surface reflecting the clear blue sky and ocean beyond.

'Don't be so overwhelmed.' a deep voice said behind me making me swallow anxiously.

Beside me, Thor stopped to admire the palace in all its glory. I peered up at him, his blue eyes narrowed and arms crossed over his chest. Though there was a small smile on his face, he was resigned, in another place. No doubt remembering his original home - my stomach flipped at the thought. All of his stories he had shared with me these past few weeks, his adventures and memories - all of it seemed fictional, like stories to tell a child before they went to sleep.

In my mind that was true, in his mind he was the hero, he was the God the stories were told about. It still didin't settle - the truth, the abruptness of how quickly the world around me had changed and how fast I had had to become accustomed to it.

Thor turned back to me with a small shake of his head, a hand clasped my shoulder firmly,
'I'm truly happy to have you here. I'm hoping you find yourself a home here, Evageline, a place to grow your own memories.'

I stared back at him and only nodded once, still not sure what words were right. My stomach was anxious but my head pounded with angry words, my heart however felt like it had sunken into the black depths of my body - like I was a walking ghost.

Thor's eyes narrowed slightly and I swore I saw tears well and because I didn't want him crying on my first day and because I didn't want to make a bad impression on the people of New Asgard I spoke quickly, offering him something,
'I hope I can too.' And it's all I could offer. I willed myself to speak some more but my mouth wouldn't open.

Thor dropped his hand and smiled broadly before stalking off and I followed him across the bridge, to where the palace only grew larger and my hands nervously smoothed down the skirt on my sundress.

The gates to the palace opened and Thor still continued onward. The grounds were filled with lush gardens and reflection pools. Families picnicked, small groups of tourists clicked their cameras and young couples strolled together on the grounds. The sight settled my stomach slightly, at seeing this place filled with life, where people - humans - were welcome to come and go.

People stared as we passed, at Thor not me, though I could sense their curiosity of who I might be. The stares ranged from adoration to respect and some even fear. Perhaps seeing me following the God of Thunder into his palace they might assume we were meeting to discuss the fate of the world, or some other important business.

There was a bittersweet ambience surrounding the fate of our world, regaining those we lost - though at the same time we waited, holding our breath for the next attack, the next big bad. Wasn't it in our lore, our myths and fairytales? Though the 'good guys' had won, they had dissipated like the Gods of old. Who would save us now?

The path continued through another gateway - this one closed to the public, guards dressed in traditional Asgardian armour flanked the entrance. Inside the hall stretched forward, the floors polished marble, columns flocked either side of the hall holding up the ceiling which only wove into intricate moving pictures on the ceiling of the familiar stories Thor had told me of recently. More guards stood in position, still as statues as we passed through wordlessly, only our footsteps echoed in the vast space.

To the left and right two long hallways stretched on to show closed doors, living quarters and bedrooms. Thor skipped down several stairs and the room opened, no walls or windows beyond us. Only a single throne before a group of columns and beyond, the sea - cerulean and glittering with the shine of the sun on its surface.

I stared in awe of the architecture. The simplicity and grandeur. Thor did not take a seat on the throne and he did not speak. He only watched me as I took it all in, moving toward the throne and skimming my fingers over its pure gold surface. It was new, built here on earth using Asgardian magic and craft - it was not the throne the All-Father had once sat upon.

I wasn't sure why that had bothered me so much, it had felt underwhelming, more of a prop than anything. It held no history, it had no lore and no impact upon the world. Not yet.

'You can sit, try it out.' Thor said giddily and I furrowed my brows wondering if he was serious, if he had caught the words in my head. But there was a lightness about him, an excitement rolling off of his person. So I sit to appease him and he grinned.

'How does it feel?' He asked.

I shuffled right back on the throne and despite my height, my feet didn't quite touch the floor. It was comfortable and a thrill hummed through me as I sat forward and placed my arms on the armrests. I looked over the empty hall and its guards stood in position. Images filled my mind, people dancing, talking and watching me. The joy this place could bring, the room filled with golden light and laughter, strangers hoping to become friends.

The image disappeared and I shoved off the throne to turn to Thor.

'I don't want to do this.' I told him. Though there was a small part of me that revelled in the potential power, in the attention and adoration from the people of New Asgard and potentially the world. Though there was a larger part of me that hated all of this. It was a fantasy for most women - most girls - but what it took to get here, I would have traded it all in a second.

My chest tightened and I had to bite down on the tip of my tongue, focusing on the pain to stop my eyes welling. Thor must have sensed this because he nodded again, deep in thought, thick arms crossed back over his chest. Despite his casual clothes, there was an air about him which fit this place, this room. A deep power about him I could never have.

'You don't have to do anything.' He said, 'This place is your home. It should never be a place that you fear or hate. I have learnt that a home is where love is and where joy is, not rage or hate.'

'I'm not saying I'll leave.' I said quickly. He knew the rest of my words without me saying them, that I had no where else to go. That the world was not full of possibilities for me - it was an empty void.

'You will always be welcomed here. I have no expectations of you.'

'Wow, thanks.' I smirked and his eyes widened, hands up in defence,

'I don't wish to presume this will be easy for you, Evangeline. We have time to work all of this out.' He gestured between us and I nodded. He was right, all we had was time. Millenia of it apparently. Or so I assumed when he had told me how old Odin was when he had passed.

'It's just Eva,' I corrected him.

'Right, Eva.' He said with a tight smile. 'It suits you well.'

'Thanks,' Then the air between us became rigid with unspoken things, things I knew Thor wished to apologise and make up for, things I didn't want to talk about because it reminded me of why and how I came to be standing there in the palace in New Asgard. An impossible reality.

'I've got some things to do.' Thor said, hands on his hips 'Take a look around, break some things, get into some trouble.' He grinned and I smiled back at his absurd words. I assumed his jokes were a way to ease the tension and awkwardness of the situation.

Thor left and I did as he said, minus the breaking and troublemaking. The hall to the left and its doorways led to empty lavish bedrooms, drawing rooms and weapons rooms. The hall to the right spun into more halls and stairwells and it took near two hours for me to find my way back to the main hall. Thor had mentioned on the way to New Asgard I could have any room I wished, only to let him know so he could have what little remained of my old things moved in.

I couldn't settle on a room, so instead wandered back into the throne room where the afternoon sun was sitting upon the water, casting the ocean and throne room into a warm golden glow. I slipped past the throne with a quick glance over my shoulder at the guards who stood still, unwavering and seemingly unblinking in their positions. Out on the terrace, I took a chance to breathe in the warm air. To beat positive thoughts into my mind.

They were incessant lately, particularly as I had ventured to New Asgard with a giddy, talkative Thor. He tried his best to fill me in on the ways of his people, his philosophies and what he had learnt as King. Though there were times on the plane in which he had become quiet and withdrawn, his eyes wandering and voice growing deeper. It was his mention of Thanos - or rather lack of - and what had transpired. He was preaching to the choir, I had lost too much too.

Thor had lost his entire family. So had I. He had lost his home and his sense of purpose. Maybe that's why I said yes to him when he proposed I come to live in New Asgard - it was better than salvaging what I had left of my life. I couldn't keep waiting for my family to return, it was evident that when the rest of the population of earth came back that my family wasn't coming back.

And I was the only one. Funny how my tragedy was what made Thor find me.

My eyes flitted over the beach which stretched the mainland, the hills in the east and a white lighthouse nestled farther down the stretch of land. With nothing else to do, I ventured out. No-one stopped me, instead, the gates opened and I hurried through the gardens, avoiding any curious glances my way.

The walk through the town was peaceful, the sound of townspeople chattering, dogs barking and children playing was enough for me to be thankful for. That despite all of the shit I'd had to face I ended up here. That the people who lived here had also faced horror and heartbreak and still decided to build a life for themselves. I hoped to do the same.

I kept onward with a little more joy in my step until the houses thinned out and spread into small properties and the cobblestone path turned into a worn dirt path. I was grateful for the cool air as I finally found myself up the hillside and near the lighthouse.

It was aged, the red paint near the top of the tower faded. The entire structure was shorter and stouter than I had imagined, with a few steps leading up to the door.

I paused, not sure whether to knock and go inside or leave. But Thor said I was welcome to explore, so I knocked briefly. There were no lights on and the door was open, with a hard push I was inside and a little disappointed. I awaited someone to shout out or a face to appear but instead there was silence and emptiness.

Dust coated the round room, thick dirt on the floorboards. Light filtered in as dust motes floated in the air and I screwed my nose up to keep from sneezing. There was no furniture save for a small card table pushed up against the far window and a broken, three-legged chair.

The stairs to the left were still standing and I hoped also sturdy as I climbed the tower. My hand skimmed the brick wall and I found myself grinning at the winding shelves built into the walls, still scattered with worn books.

I reached the top of the lighthouse to find another small room. Not as bare like downstairs but still dirty. A small desk and chair were pushed beside a ladder leading upward to the lantern room. A low and bare bed also sat pushed up against the curved walls. Bright golden light filtered through the room as the north-facing wall was built-in floor to ceiling windows. A balcony led off of the windows and with a hard push the door gave way, I ducked out to step anxiously onto the balcony hoping it didn't give way.

With a deep breath, I etched forward and grasped the railing to steady myself. It was quite stable for the whistling of the wind and flutter of birds above. I followed the balcony which wrapped around the entire building and back around. I leant back a little to peer up at the panes of the window for the lantern room to find the windows murky and unwashed. No doubt this place was abandoned.

Below the sea lapped at the sand and I skirted my eyes back toward the palace to see it in all its glory, from this angle I could make out small balconies lining the north-facing side. The town was minuscule in comparison, its green hillsides and simple buildings picturesque and welcoming.

My eyes skirted back to the beach where I decided to head next. Upon making it through the soft sand to the water, a bright light flashed in the sky like lightning and just as quickly the blue sky turned deep grey, thunder booming around me so deafening I flinched.

And then a soaring sound, the air moves too fast around me, my long hair whipped around my face and the wind pushed me from my feet onto the damp sand. Around me, sand flew into the air as something crashed into the ground, pushing through the sand and landing in a heap only a few feet away.

I stood and tried to brush my hair from my face, breath caught in my lungs to see Thor standing above something, Stormbreaker in his hand, aimed downward at the person sprawled before him. He no longer wore casual clothes but his full Asgardian armour. I couldn't glance the person before him and curious, a little nervous too, I crept forward to peer over Thor's shoulder.

'This is a little bit of an overreaction don't you think?' The voice said, deep and alluring - a little playful too.

In Thor's hand, Stormbreaker crackled as blue light moved over the surface of the blade. His own voice rumbled with the thunder in the sky, his long hair moved in the wind,

'I grieved you.' Thor spoke, his voice full of rage and something I couldn't pick up - guilt, shame?

I had rounded Thor now, he must have sensed me there because he turned his head slightly to glance at me, his shoulders straightening slightly, Stormbreaker lowering to his side. His gaze turned to the man before him, getting to his feet, brushing sand from his hands.

He was slightly taller than Thor, dressed in all black - his black hair long too and curled around his shoulders. His own gaze turned to me in surprise, blue eyes narrowing in on me. He said nothing and instead turned to Thor who offered no information to him. He was still angry though, his chest heaved in deep breaths.

I knew this other man. I had seen him on the news, images of him flashed on the TV from the Battle of New York. I had witnessed second-hand the havoc he had wreaked on the city, I had seen the creatures he had summoned. I had heard Thor's stories of him followed by his joyful laughter, stories of brotherhood and mischievousness, jealousy and love. I had seen the grief on Thor's face, I had seen the tears in his eyes and the pain set in his jaw as he remembered his dead brother.

'Loki.' I breathed.

And the God of Mischief grinned.

Chapter Text

Thor said nothing, he stalked past me on the beach and I was left staring at Loki, the very much alive God of Mischief.

He had only to look at me for a moment more, meeting my gaze with his questioning one before he stalked after Thor, his strides long to meet Thor's angry ones. I followed, not sure of what else to do or where to go, supposing Thor was heading back to the palace.

'I assume that you're angry with me, dear brother.' Loki said speaking to Thor, 'But can you not admit you are also happy to see me?'

Thor said nothing, let out a gruff mock of laughter and continued to stalk down the beach. I was able to keep up with the two of them and within earshot to hear Loki's words to Thor as he turned to walk backwards so that he could face Thor as he spoke,

'I have my reasons. You can't say you aren't impressed that I managed to fake my death, nonetheless convinced Thanos of it-'

Thor stopped walking and tossed Stormbreaker to his side where it landed heavily in the sand. Thor's hands were on Loki, grasping his shirt tightly as he grated out his words,

'What part of this is humourous to you, Loki? Asgard has been destroyed, our friends lost their lives to fight for the Nine Realms and you return after it all to think I wish to welcome you back with open arms? Not this time.'

Though he had finished speaking, Thor did not let go of Loki whose own long fingers pried Thor's hands from him. His face grew serious, leaning into Thor with a deep-set frown as he spoke,

'What do you think would have happened if I had returned?'

'You could have helped,' Thor said and shook his head at his brother. 'You could have not been so selfish.'

'Yes well, you and your costumed friends seemed to have managed well enough.' Loki said, crossing his arms over his chest, throwing a look in my direction. I had thought he would continue to ignore me but he moved past Thor to hone in on me. Thor turned his entire body to watch Loki, his eyes narrowed and untrusting.

I wondered if it was a distraction from Loki, to put the focus on me and keep it away from the conversation of his betrayal. I was ruffled by it, annoyed that he couldn't apologise for his death or lack thereof. I had seen Thor's grief, I had witnessed it from afar. Though I think perhaps the appearance of my own family would have had me befuddled, I would not hesitate to embrace them and cry tears of joy.

Though Loki had done this before, no doubt Thor did not understand the punch line.

'I'm not sure you belong here, darling.' Loki said, standing before me.

He was close enough I had to tilt my chin up to look at him, a game of his to inflict intimidation. But I was not intimidated, I was intrigued. Not only by the purr in his tone or the half-upturned smirk on his mouth but by how devastating he was.

I had become accustomed to Thor's handsomeness quite quickly, though it was a fact. The sky was blue, the earth was round, god's were beautiful. But Loki was other. He was chaos in the form of a man. Though I had wondered if this was partly to do with his Jötunn heritage, the coolness of his character probably connected to the ice in his veins.

Maybe it was the contrast of his blue eyes and black hair, his flawless skin or maybe the smile lines around his eyes; but Loki was never to be confused as anything other than a God. Though the word demon came quicker to my mind.

Not wishing to be wordless before Loki, I spoke confident words which had Thor hiding a smile, 'For someone who has so desperately wished to be king, you lack the courage to face your enemies.'

This seemed to rile him, something dark flashed in his eyes, some memory maybe. His hand snaked forward to grasp my chin, lightly to force me to look into his eyes. The softest brush of his fingers against my skin had me releasing a breath I had wished to be a hiss, instead, it had sounded like a pleasurable exhale. I felt my cheeks burn.

'Are you indicating I should make an enemy out of you?'

Thor stiffened behind Loki, though Loki was the only thing in my vision. I could see the sky darken further, I heard the brush of the wind as it broke against Loki's back and brushed past to ruffle my hair again. With it, I caught his scent, light citrus and deep leather, fresh and alluring.

'Loki,' Warned Thor, but Loki enjoyed the teasing, attempting to have me fight or flee. I would do neither. Loki leant in with a broad grin, his cool cheek caressed my own as he moved in to whisper in my ear.

'I would so delight in you meeting my blade.'

I pulled back from him and caught Thor's disapproving gaze, his face screwed up in dismay. Loki chuckled,

'I take that as a no? Another time, perhaps?' his gaze lingered on me, moving down my body, hesitating on my hips, lingering a second too long on my breasts. Though I had in recent years grown to notice the stares from men on my body, I didn't appreciate it. I had only enjoyed the attention with alcohol in my system for confidence - even then I relied far more on my face to attract them. But the way in which Loki looked at me was more than a look of lust or want, it felt like praise.

It should have made me feel disgusted. Instead, as his blue eyes met mine again, I could have sworn I saw the faintest red blush in his cheeks - I was captivated.

Finally, Thor's hand reached forward to grasp his brother's shoulder firmly. Loki shrugged him off in annoyance and Thor once again shoved his brother toward the palace.

'We need to talk,' Thor said.

'I don't think we do,' Loki said 'I'm not overly fond of small talk.'

'You might want to understand how the people of New Asgard will greet you,'

'With open arms and tears of joy, no doubt.' Loki turned to wink at me and I began to follow the two of them in silence.

'Your welcome here will not be as you wish it to be, I want you to understand that.' Thor continued onward, fingers stretched behind him to summon Stormbreaker back into his hand. A small crackle of blue on the blade followed and soon the dark sky eased into orange afternoon light.

'The scenery is quaint, but I'm sure I can make do.' Loki shrugged.

'You still act as if you are second in line to the throne,' Thor sighed.

'Well, I am.' Loki came to an abrupt stop as Thor did, tutting at his brother, hands firm on his hips.

'No, you're not.' Thor said with a shake of his head, his gaze landing on me.

Loki rolled his eyes, turned his gaze also to me, 'What, don't tell me you've married this Midgardian.'

'Eva is not my wife.' Thor said eyes lowered to the sand. I felt the scrutinising gaze of Loki as he tried to assess the relationship between Thor and myself.

I went to answer, to lay out the truth before Loki before he could begin to devise ways to rid me from New Asgard. Loki placed a hand over his heart,

'Am I to be an uncle then?' He smirked and Thor's face screwed up in disgust.

'Not in the way you assume.' Thor uttered, Loki frowned, confusion clouding his face.

'I'm certain I understand the way in which a child is produced.'

'I'm his daughter,' I blurted out, sick of their incessant bickering.

Loki's smile dropped from his face, Thor straightened his shoulders, meeting Loki's exasperated gaze, soon turning to a frown and then his head shook wildly.

'Absolutely not!'

'She is.' Thor shrugged.

'She's a child.'

'I'm twenty-five.' I crossed my own arms across my chest.

'Exactly!' Loki threw his hands in the air, and ran his hands down his face, I tried to straighten my posture as if to prove I was a woman and not a child. Though I suppose in their eyes I was, they had millennia of life already lived. I had less than three decades.

'Either way, Eva is my daughter. It was prophesied.'

'You can't prove that.' Loki spat.

'It was prophesied.' Thor said again.

'Prophecies aren't real. She could be anyone's child.' Loki moved toward Thor, not breaking eye contact, his hands placed upon his brother's shoulders as if to convince him he was making this all up. I wish he was, I wish I was not on this beach listening to two gods bicker about my parentage.

Loki spoke in hushed tones to Thor and I lifted up my hand and Thor caught the movement, releasing his grip on Stormbreaker as it flew from his hand into my own. I stumbled slightly with the force of it, the weight of it in my hand comfortable but substantial. Pure power. Divine power.

Loki had stopped midsentence to cast his eyes upon me, standing with Stormbreaker in my hand. My own gaze was firm on him, Thor had a grin plastered on his own face at the sight of me - his daughter - wielding his weapon.

'Well,' Loki breathed, 'I think we might need to have that talk.'

Chapter Text

There was only the sound of cutlery scraping upon dinnerware as the three of us ate in silence.
Thor had sat at the head of the table, I sat a ridiculous way away on the other end while Loki sat in the middle, silently sipping a glass of wine.

He was relaxed in the grand setting, sleeves of his black shirt rolled up to reveal veined forearms, his black tie loosened around his neck.

I had instead kept my head down, focused on my food and the sheer presentation of the quaint dish. Though my stomach was hungry, I couldn't force more than a few bites down my throat. My knee jostled under the table anxiously as Thor took a sip of his mead and slammed the glass down hard.

I jumped. Both men threw glances my way, Thor's apologetic, Loki's closer to a sneer. He didn't like me, more so he didn't like me being there. Didn't like how my mere presence had cast him down to third place - the throne even further from his grasp. Though a small part of me imagined it wasn't the throne he wanted, it was the attention being king brought.

'So what, pray tell is this prophecy?' Loki asked, refilling his wine glass with a flick of his wrist. I gawked a little at the trick, he smirked at me as he lifted the glass to his lips,

'And why are you taking it so seriously, I thought you didn't believe in prophecies?' He took a long sip of his wine, placing the glass back on the table and then licking his lips slowly. I looked away, pushing my plate away from me.

'I did not believe in many things a short time ago. I didn't believe it possible my brother could fake his death yet again. To deceive me the way you have, only proves me wrong once again. I cannot believe that I had mourned you all these years, you will never allow me to forget how I have wronged you in the past.'

Thor sank back in his seat, eyes watered with tears unshed. His own plate pushed away from him. My stomach tightened. I felt for Thor, I had only been introduced to my father post-blip but I had seen the desperation on his face when he had announced himself as my father, wondering if I would walk away and deny him.

Besides a few strange friends, Thor was alone. A king from another realm expected to rule his people and build back what they had lost. I admired my father, his strength, his passion to bring joy to those that had lost. Though it had been mere months since his introduction, I held him in high regard. A hero, worthy of the love his people gave him. But like me, he was alone.

Loki only shrugged, 'You did allow our father to lock me in the dungeons.'

'That was one time.' Thor bit back.

'Clearly, you were the favourite child.' Loki sneered.

'I did not try to conquer Midgard and deceive the Asgardian people.'

I pushed my chair out to stand and as I did both men's eyes landed on me.

'I'm going to leave you two to snipe at one another.' I said, moving to leave, I only managed to make it to the door before a voice told me to stop and sit.

It was not Thor, it was Loki.

'I wish to hear your story, how a Midgardian woman happened to wake up one day and become the daughter of Thor, the great and powerful God of Thunder.' His words dripped with sarcasm.

I turned and tried to level my glare at Loki but he only slunk back in his chair, glass in hand, the fingers of his other hand rapping on the arm of his chair. He would be incessant, I knew he would hound me until he got the truth - the full story of how Evangeline Harris, a human and ordinary young woman became Evangeline Thorsdóttir. Though I suppose I always was, it was just not known.

I didn't wish to stay but Loki nodded to my chair to sit, I did so just to please him. Thor allowed me to speak, his head turned to the side, his mind someplace else and his arms over his chest. I couldn't quite make out his thoughts or why this story would bore him, or why he was not willing to tell it himself.

'My family didn't come back post-blip. I sought out answers but things were hard, are still hard. People managed to fit back into their lives, some didn't. I was turned away when I questioned it, told to reconcile with the fact that my family wouldn't come back, or maybe they had and weren't able to cope with a world which had moved on without them.' I focused on the table before me, the plate of half-eaten food, the rounded edge of the plate.

'Things got stranger, several months after, when it was assumed that the entire population was returned, I was contacted.' I moved forward on the edge of my seat ready to stand and leave, not wishing to recall the events any longer. Loki was a stranger. It wasn't like he had any regard for my loss or what I had gone through. Rather, he only wished to figure out a way to deny the truth. To reclaim his place as second in line to the throne.

'Was it Fury?' Loki asked. The name was familiar, something Thor had mentioned to me. The man was important, I knew as much. His name only added to the long list of heroes and agents and spies and warriors Thor had often talked fondly of.

'No. Thor.' I told Loki meeting his gaze.

'I hardly believe that.' Loki balked, turning to Thor, 'How, dear brother, did you come to realise after all these years that you had fathered a Midgardian child? Seems a little too convenient, what with her entire family having disappeared.'

'It was kept from me, by our mother.' Thor replied flatly, a brow raised at Loki awaiting a smart comeback.

Loki swallowed, the glass in his hand slipped from his grip and he managed to take a hold of it before it dropped to the floor. His head whipped around to Thor, eyes narrowed.

'You're lying.' Loki spat the words.

'What would I gain from lying, brother?'

'A throne. A kingdom. Placing me second best, yet again.'

'Loki,' Thor said calmly, his tone levelled, 'I would never speak ill of our mother. What she did was best for me and for Eva and you will come to understand that the universe has not been kind, to any of us.'

'Were you always planning to come back?' I asked Loki who took a few seconds to turn and realise I was talking to him.

'Not at first.'

'So why is it such a great concern of yours that I am here? Shouldn't you be grateful you have a family to come back to?' My words were sharp, biting in anger and I knew Loki could tell I was ruffled by his lack of gratitude and nerve to question my appearance yet not explain his own.

'We are not family.' Loki said, pushing his chair pack and standing, smoothing down his tie. Taking long and purposeful strides toward the door, as he passed me I noticed a muscle in his jaw tick.

'Evangeline is my daughter, Princess to the throne of New Asgard. She is your niece.' Thor bellowed after him, moving from his own chair. I shook my head as Thor looked at me, it was a small moment that only secured my trust in him as he stood up for me. But it was unneeded, I didn't need to explain myself to a God who deceived even those closest to him.

Loki pivoted on his heel to point at Thor, his tone low and the air rippled with tension and rage.

'I am not her uncle.'

'Regardless, you are my brother.' Thor frowned.

I stood from my chair hoping to escape and leave the two of them to fight alone. The room was growing hot, both men's chests heaving with anger. Both were eager to have the other surrender and apologise. Neither would this early into the night I was sure.

As I passed Loki , his hand reached out to grasp my arm, I hadn't expected it and pulled back but his fingers only snaked around my wrist.

'You and I share no blood.' Loki breathed.

Cold bit into my skin. I peered down to see where his skin met mine, his long fingers fit around the circumference of my wrist, squeezing firmly as if his touch would also remind me that we certainly weren't family and that he could harm me without a second thought. It was made clear his loyalties lie with Thor, not me.

'Why would I want to?' I replied and peered up at his gaze. Not fleeing, not pulling away. I took the chance to take him in again and how his beauty hid the darker parts of him.

There was a small crease between his brows as he looked down at me, his lips pursed and blue eyes darkening, though they conveyed far more emotion than he wanted to show. Loki dropped my wrist and stalked from the room.

'Will you tell him the whole truth?' I asked Thor without looking at him. 'How you came to find me?'

'Eventually.' He replied, 'He has some grovelling to do beforehand.'

'He's a brat.' I turned to Thor who smiled and shrugged as if he couldn't change the fact.

'He's adopted.'

'All-Father help me.' I groaned running my hand down my face.

'He's dead.' Thor answered like I was unaware. I was beginning to understand why Frigga kept me a secret from Thor and Loki. How would I have ended up had I been raised by the God of Thunder and the God of Mischief?

Before I escaped I asked the one question which had been sitting on my mind since Thor had told me of my true heritage.

'What is it I am Goddess of?'

'I can't say.' His gaze was sympathetic, 'Your powers will manifest over time.'

It was not the answer I was looking for. But I would still seek it out in the future. Was it not prophesied that I was the daughter of Thor, surely I would come to grow some type of abilities which would make me worthy of being his child?

***

That night, after seeking out a room deep into the castle, upon one of the higher floors, I laid in bed, my mind running with my interaction with Loki. The God of Mischief was true to his name, his arrival timed perfectly much to his benefit - before my celebrations tomorrow night where he probably would upstage me with the news of his own return to his people.

My mind continued to hum with thoughts, the unfamiliar setting didn't help ease my mind or make me comfortable.

Instead, I drew on a thin robe and headed to the balcony - which stretched across the entire level and led to other closed doors - to listen to the dark lull of the sea. It did little to keep me warm, the clothes I had found in my wardrobe were elaborate and exquisite pieces looking more like they belonged on a catwalk than in my bedroom. Even my nightgown underneath was delicate, made of long flowing white silk.

I wanted my own things but they had yet to appear and a part of me hoped they wouldn't. A glance at them would only have me back in the before, to a simpler and happier time. A normal time when I was a woman and not the daughter of a God.

I was still Eva though, wasn't I? At the core, I was still me. Or was I only holding onto who I thought I was meant to be, did I have to relinquish my past to capture my powers, to become a Goddess?

I squeezed my eyes shut and allowed the tears to fall, opening them again to see the world waver slightly, the dark of the world only slightly illuminated by the bright moon.

A sob escaped me, and then another as I cried angry, hot and shaky tears. I let out a growl of frustration, to allow myself to stop and get a grip. Even alone I hated the vulnerability of it, of being torn open like that.

'Fuck,' I yelled and then again as a cool breeze moved around me.

'What pretty words you know, Princess.' A voice sounded from beside me and I jerked back, turning to see Loki a few feet from me leaning one arm on the balcony railing.

He was still dressed though he was even more relaxed than he was at dinner, no tie, his shirt half-unbuttoned to reveal a light dusting of chest hair and hard muscles. His hair had curled more, not as neat as earlier in the day.

His grin wavered as he met my eyes, I swiped at my face and frowned at him.

'What are you doing?' He asked me like he didn't know I had just been bawling.

'Nothing,' I lied and peered past him to see a door farther down opened, light cast out onto the balcony.

'What are you doing up here?' I rubbed my nose to make sure I wasn't blubbering snot too.

'Those are my rooms.' He said matter of factly. 'This palace is modelled after its predecessor. Though less grand and a lot quainter.'

I rolled my eyes at his privilege and said nothing as I turned to leave but Loki reached forward, I stopped and caught sight of his hand before me and he dropped it, his fingers flexing into a fist before he placed it in his pocket. As if he had suddenly remembered I was nothing to him.

'We should remain civil.'

'Why?' I asked. It must have been a good question because Loki actually bowed his head slightly and took time to consider it.

'We have some things in common.' He said finally meeting my gaze, eyebrow raised.

'A mutual dislike for each other and adoration of Thor?'

He smiled, not a grin, not a smirk but a smile and there was a slight flutter in my stomach. An uneasiness as he chuckled.

'Yes, that and an appetite for attention.'

'I'm lost.' I replied.

Loki stepped forward and again I caught the scent of him. My heart sped up. I shouldn't have been alone with him, I couldn't trust him, even my father couldn't. The height of him had me reeling slightly, though I had my own height behind me, my eyes only met his mouth.

'I'm not surprised.' He replied in that deep alluring tone of his, it almost made his insult fly by unnoticed.

'I meant to return to Asgard - New Asgard,' he corrected, 'And reunite with my brother. You see I've spent near twenty of your lifetimes by my brother's side, Thor irritating me and myself helping him on his silly little adventures.'

'I don't need you to set the scene. I understand what you are to Thor and how much he loves you.'

'Then you understand he does not love you the same.' Loki shrugged as if his words didn't feel like ice against my chest - like he could simply diminish my relationship with Thor so easily.

'He is my father.' I counteracted.

'And fathers are unnecessary monsters. Allow them to think they have a hold on you and you become subservient and weak.'

'That is your experience. Not mine.' I raised my chin slightly, though we were speaking of Thor I thought to the human man who raised me. The unconditional love and joyful childhood memories.

'Not yet. I'm just suggesting you take a step backward, realise that I will always precedent you, darling.'

I took in his meaning, not swayed by his argument. 'For someone so old, you're certainly fucking dumb.'

He cocked a brow at me and shifted forward, interested in my words. Now I felt the warmth of him. I was half-expecting him to be carved from ice, if I had touched him unwillingly would his skin turn pallid blue, would his eyes burn red? I managed to take a half-step back to push some space between us.

'You think Thor will choose you, the betrayer, the murderer, the backstabber over his child? His only daughter?' I bit my lip to keep from laughing.

'You have time and memories and inside jokes. I have something you will never have,'

I paused and Loki gestured for me to continue, closing the gap between us. 'Well, what is it?'

I wouldn't tell him because I would never make Thor choose. I know I would have chosen my own family over the two of them. Instead, I decided to keep my cards close to my chest, to keep Loki guessing. I shook my head, keeping my eyes on his even though I could feel his breath on my own face, sweet with the scent of wine.

'I'm not arguing with my uncle about love.'

'I'm not your uncle.' Loki all but spat the words at me like they were poison and his chest was pressed against mine, his brows lowered and mouth in a tight line.

'Right.' I licked my lips nervously but did not hesitate to stay standing, not allowing him the pleasure of thinking I was scared of him. 'You're Loki. God of Mischief. Though I find the title "selfish-cunt" more fitting.'

He tried to hide his smile and I tried to hide mine as his eyes sparkled with amusement, the corner of his mouth lifting. I had half-expected him to be disgusted at my words, to call me something half as degrading and lay his hands on me.

The both of us stood there, staring at each other silently. Loki just managed to shake his head but I caught the broad grin on his face as he turned to return to his rooms. When the door shut I let my smile slip.

It had been a long time since I had thrown that word around. It had been an even longer while since I had interacted with someone and enjoyed it, that I had left a conversation feeling lighter.

I managed to slip into sleep easily, the last image in my mind was Loki's hidden smile.

Chapter Text

Thor never mentioned what was expected of me as a Princess, how I should act or what I should say. Though I had enough common knowledge and I was a grown woman, I hadn't expected to be awoken at sunrise with a swift knock on the door and a maid sweeping in with a tray of breakfast.

I sat up hastily in the bed as the tray was placed across my legs. It looked appetising and the plate was overfilled with meats, cheese, some type of smoked fish and slices of thick-cut bread. There was a glass of water and a mug of black coffee in an oversized glass.

I thanked the woman who only nodded and left the room. I ate quickly, it was clear enough that I was meant to rise early and greet the day ahead though I would have rather laid back down in the thick covers and slept until midday.

I had half-expected an ancient bathroom but was thankful to see modern-day facilities in the bathroom and a quick inspection of the cupboards showed all the cosmetics and hair accessories I would have needed to present myself as a princess.

The sun had moved higher in the sky by the time I finished, my bedroom cast in a warm golden glow and someone had opened the glass doors leading onto the balcony, my bed was made along with my clothes back in the wardrobe. My fingers ran over the gowns displayed, though there were only a few, I could have sworn the ones I had admired yesterday had been switched out for new ones. Most of the dresses were monochrome in deep colours of red and blue and yellow. I picked the simplest of them, a sleeveless golden yellow gown, fitted at the bust with buttons trailing down the centre where the skirt split open.

Not surprisingly it fit me well, though I was surprised that it was simple to move in. I finished dressing and left the room to find a guard snap to attention and lead me without a word down the hall and down a set of spiral stairs to a lower level.

Much like the main hall, there was no furniture and the space was entirely grey from its ceiling to the floor. To either side of the space, men and women sparred in traditional Asgardian armour, some of them had weapons and some fought with their bare hands. There was no far wall but instead, an open terrace facing the ocean, stairs leading down to another sparring area where Thor was instructing a young woman, his fists held out before him as she copied him.

The first few steps I took into the room had everyone stopping what they were doing. I stopped walking as the eyes of the warriors fell on me their heads bowed in respect and my cheeks flushed, I was suddenly too aware of my dress and how I was walking and what to do with my hands.

I continued regardless, the guard following closely behind me, only his and my footsteps echoed in the space. It was not until I reached Thor and his group of warriors that I felt myself breathe properly again. He welcomed me with open arms,

'Eva, welcome!' He bounded up the stairs and embraced me roughly, grasping my shoulders and grinning down at me warmly.

'This is really cool,' I said lamely and my eyes meandered around the terrace where warriors watched Thor and I interact. Several of them in small huddled groups had begun to whisper amongst themselves, I pulled back slightly from Thor who must have realised my uncomfortableness and gestured to the stairs we stood on,

'Sit, watch. You'll pick it up soon enough,'

I nodded and as he turned to skip back down the stairs and continue his lesson I caught his arm,

'Wait, what do you mean? I'm not fighting.'

Thor chuckled, 'Not today. Eventually. Odin taught me most things I know, as I'll teach you.'

'Okay,' I uttered, hoping to avoid that at all costs and sweeping my skirt aside to perch upon the steps. Not only was I not fit, but imagining myself sparring in front of these people, out of breath, my body too heavy, too awkward - it would be humiliating. I had no grace about myself and I had never expected Thor to want to have me fight. What the fuck would I be fighting?

Thor's voice echoed in the space and I paid less attention to him and his words and instead took the chance to take in the people around me. I had noticed then that some wore simpler clothes, black and tight-fitting, more obviously human than Asgardian. How far had they come to be here? What were they training for? But my head spins, I knew the truth. Despite their courage for being here and the strength of their bodies. They were just as scared as the rest of us, still holding our breath for the next invasion, the next conqueror, the next beginning of the end.

My eye caught on the man Thor called into his space, with dark brown hair and sapphire blue eyes. Thor clasped his shoulder in greeting and the man took Thor's place, fists raised at the woman in front of him. She said something too low for me to hear to him and he smiled. Bright and white, straight teeth lit up his entire face, a soft dimple on his left cheek. I had shifted forward, my chin resting on my hands to keep my focus.

Thor circled the two of them as they fought, dodging punches and kicks, Thor often interjecting about their movements and technique. My eyes stayed on the man, only once did his eyes move toward me but it was too quick for me to think anything of it, that it was purposeful. I was the only woman in the space dressed in a yellow gown. I may as well have screamed, "look at me, I'm the princess."

I felt someone take a seat beside me and turned my face to see Loki reclining on the step, legs crossed in front of him and arms crossed over his chest. He was dressed in his Asgardian leathers, his pants tight on his legs, over his long arms.

I turned my face from him as he looked at me and focused my attention back on the fight. Loki spoke though, unable to go a moment unnoticed,

'Pretty,' My eyes flitted to him expecting him to be smirking, had his words been thick in sarcasm or was I just annoyed by his presence? Instead, his eyes meandered over the dress, and then my hair. His hand reached out to touch it, taking the end of a long bronze curl in between his fingers and expecting it. I swatted his hand away with an exhale and he crossed his arms back over his chest, his attention on the fight.

I didn't say anything, I had to bite my tongue to stop myself from taking his bait. Had I said thank you he would have remained condescending, had I told him to fuck off he would have claimed I was sensitive. It was best to remain silent.

The fight ended with no winner and the man and woman nodded at each other in good sportsmanship and Thor called up two other women and spoke to them. My gaze unconsciously followed the man as he went to unbutton his leather doublet, shaking it off and unravelling the ties of his shirt underneath.

His hand ran through his hair, slightly curled now with sweat around his brows. He took a glass of water offered to him from a man beside him and as he sipped his ocean-blue gaze met mine over the glass and it remained on me for a second too long for me to think it was anything but purposeful. Then his gaze was moving beside me where it lowered and he turned his back.

I swallowed, loudly and shifted back on the step.

'Eva,' Thor called and gestured for me to come and join him.

'Go on, Evangeline.' Loki purred, 'Show these fine Asgardian warriors what skills you possess.'

I stood quickly and avoided Loki's gaze, but I stumbled as I moved forward, I knew it was not my dress for the split down the front gave me free movement and as I turned back Loki was shifting his foot back from where it had caught upon my skirt. He smirked and mouthed a whoops to me.

I felt myself flush bright red and tried to create a calming mantra in my mind. Stay calm, these are your people. But it did little to help as Thor began to introduce me to the women, I didn't catch anything he said and instead smiled and nodded.

'Eva?' Thor said loudly.

'Sorry, what?' I said, my eyes blinking quickly to shake away my wandering thoughts.

He smiled tightly, 'Ulla here is going to walk you through some blocks. Ready?'

'No,' I blanched, 'I'm not going to fight her,' I gestured to the woman before me, she shrugged at Thor and flicked her brown ponytail over her shoulder, awaiting her king's order.

'Come on,' Thor nudged me playfully, 'You'll be fine. It's a bit of fun.'

'I'm not dressed properly,' I countered.

'All Asgardian dress is made for fighting.' and his tone was serious and condescending as if I should have known that if I'm in a fight and in a gown then there would be no limitations. Though this was Thor's kingdom, it was still my world. I wasn't fighting anyone. Least of all with my bare hands.

'No thankyou,' I shook my head and offered a polite smile to the woman and stalked back quickly to sit back upon my step, a little farther away from Loki. But again my gaze caught on the man from before. He was watching me intently, his eyes narrowed slightly as his face upturned in a small smile before he gave a slight nod, a sign of respect? Maybe, or maybe he had thought my decision smart, to keep the fighting to the experts.

Thor's disapproval was shown in his movements as his arms folded over his chest and he stalked the space, head lowered and face set in what had looked to be a focused frown as the fighters started their battle dance. I shifted back on the seat, aware of the whispering, the disappointment from the Asgardian people that their Princess didn't show them what she was made of - they probably thought me a weak idiot. A child of Thor was meant to be powerful, blessed, courageous and intelligent.

I was human. Smart in ways that weren't valued by the Asgardians. How could I prove my worth when these people wouldn't be impressed with my vast knowledge of fictional worlds or how to DIY furniture or drive a car.

'I don't need it.' I said to Loki.

'I didn't say anything.' He said. I couldn't catch his expression as I continued looking forward. I wanted to disappear, to run up back to my room and bawl on my bed. But I couldn't do that. I wouldn't allow myself the indulgence. How many months had I spent isolated, eyes swollen from endless tears, sick to my stomach with grief and anger?

'The smart-arse remarks,' I said to him, 'Or the condescending lecture about being a good daughter or about my capabilities. I don't need it.'

A soft chuckle emanated from Loki which had caught me surprise as I turned his way. And then my surprise turned into annoyance as he laughed at me, leaning toward me, his arm stretched out behind me on the step. I could feel the brush of his fingers against the skin of my back. He licked his lips before he spoke,

'How easy it is to get a rise out of you.' His eyes sparkled with mischievousness, how much he was enjoying my uneasiness was shown by his pretty smirk.

'Are you truly so upset because you cannot fight?'

'No.' I lied.

'You shouldn't be. There are many other things you cannot do which should upset you more.'

A frown settled on my face, my hands aching to wrap around his throat and squeeze though he would probably enjoy it, the sick fuck. Instead, I balled my hands into fists on my lap and opened my mouth to speak but Loki raised a finger before my mouth,

'You should start to appease dear Thor, it won't be long before he realises how much he favours his soldiers over you.'

'All because I can't fight?' I asked and Loki looked taken aback,

'Look at you,' he waved his hand at me and dropped it into his lap, his gaze then sweeping across the terrace, purposefully pointing out the female warriors, 'And look at them.'

I did. I saw the physical differences. The strength these women carried in their bodies, broad shoulders, tight muscled arms and strong legs, flat stomachs in tight-fitting clothing. The confidence they held when they interacted with one another and the men too. So proud of their bodies, comfortable in the skin they wore.

Leaning into me with a serious look in his eyes, Loki's voice dropped so that no prying ears could hear his next words,
'Laziness has no favour with my brother.'

I felt my heart contract painfully. Loki was inside my head and I was internally screaming as he knew I was suddenly realising. He was feeding on my insecurities and I would not have it.

'Get out of my head.' I snapped and stood to leave, pulling my skirt behind me so he would not snatch it in his hand and pull me down. I had believed him nasty enough to do so.

He followed me through the training hall, hot on my tail until I reached the spiral staircase and whirled on him only to be met with my own face. A trick of his - shapeshifting.

He was dressed in the same yellow gown which I had only realised now looked far too formal for a morning training session, most of the skin of my chest was showing as my hair fell over my shoulders, my breasts pushed upward by the bodice. Though I could feel my own eyes widen, Loki's illusion pasted on a smirk, large blue eyes blinking back in amusement - my eyes.

'Change back.' I demanded not liking it, not wanting him to feel what my skin was like, the shape of my body. It was far too intimate and offensive.

'Don't you find it amusing, this disguise?' I said back - Loki said back with an echo of my voice.

'Change back. Now. ' I repeated.

He smiled and my rounded cheeks grew tight in a grin. He lowered his head and looked down at my body he imitated, hands smoothing down the dress and resting on my stomach.

'Now!' I near shouted and shoved him in my body backward so hard that he dropped the illusion and had to right himself to keep from falling on his ass.

I was forced to look at him, my voice wavered, hands grasping his shoulders tightly so that my long nails dug into the leather of his jacket.
'Don't ever do that again. Do you understand me?'

Though my voice broke and betrayed my emotion, Loki only nodded once. We stood like that for several moments too long, my hands on him and chest heaving deep anxious breaths while his cold eyes kept on me as he pried my fingers off of him without a word.

I exhaled in relief as he dropped my hands which fell to my side. I had nothing to say to him. Sure also that he had nothing to say to me.

It was Loki who moved first, fleeing up the stairs, a glance over his shoulder had me flushed as his eyes met mine with fire in them. A deep ache in my lower stomach had me alarmed, my heart picking up its pace. I was angry. Desperate to have my hands on him, around his throat, pummelling him black and blue.

I replayed the moment in my head as I fled to my own rooms - of Loki's silent surrender to my demand. He could have easily said no, or did he know he had pushed me too far. It couldn't have been a small moment of kindness, could it? Did I think I would tattle to Thor and try to land him in trouble?

But that silence from him spoke volumes. It almost felt vulnerable and real, there were no sharp, smart words or tangled lies from the God of Mischief.

There was a spur of thought deep within the back of my mind I tried to ignore as I shut myself in my room and ventured out onto the balcony. I was drawn out to the soft roar of the ocean below and caught myself looking to the right, toward the doors which led to Loki's rooms.

The thought was still there, more prominent as I stood on that balcony alone and in silence. It was incessant and honest. Allowing myself to acknowledge it only created a deep well of need in me. It was a primal feeling deep in my gut, I hungered for it. It had been years since I had felt such anger, such raw emotions which had my body reacting physically. How long had I been kept in a state of numbness, how long had I been homesick for happiness?

I would welcome whatever ruin these feelings would bring me. I wanted Loki, Prince of New Asgard, God of Mischief to rattle my world and split it wide open.

Chapter Text

The fireworks were a little excessive. My welcoming party began at sunset and I had yet to leave the comfort of my room.

Thor had a traditional Asgardian dress sent up for me which still sat laid upon my bed. It was an exquisite piece of clothing, the fitted bodice was made from fine plated silver to replicate armour. The long shoulder-less sleeves flowed in a deep crimson red, embroidered with glittering jewels and crystals, cuffed at the sleeves with more silver. The skirt was a mass of red tulle, with a train which fell off of the bed.

It was ridiculous. It was not me. Maybe that was why I didn't put it on. Or maybe it was the reality of it all finally settling upon my chest - there was no going backward, no being normal and human. I could no longer want for simple things. There were expectations of me now.

The sky outside flashed in a rainbow of colours and several floors below the pounding music reached me. I stalked to the glass doors to slam them closed.

Instead I was dressed in the simplest clothing I could find in my wardrobe - once again the garments all new and unfamiliar. Though further digging I had found a sage silk slip dress buttoned down the middle.

It felt like butter against my naked skin and was far less intimidating than the heavy gown on my bed. I grabbed my heeled sandals and left my room, stomach coiled tightly and I brushed my long hair off of my shoulders. The air was growing hotter this close to summer or perhaps it was my nerves as my legs felt weak descending the stairs. By now the guests would have been fueled by sweet wine and intoxicating music.

When I reached the landing and faced the long hall which led toward the main hall and throne room I froze. Bile rose in my throat and I fled the opposite way, putting much needed space between myself and the party.

How was I supposed to enter this party, all eyes would have been on me - judging and devouring me, the people of New Asgard and some of Thor's older earth friends ready for me to impress them.

I couldn't do it. Not yet. I just need a few minutes or an hour away, to catch my breath and hype myself up for the pressure of it all. I followed the hall in the opposite direction and wound through rooms of the palace until I found myself outside in the gardens leading away from the palace.

Heels still in hand, I slipped them on before I crossed the cobblestone bridge and my gaze caught upon the distinct shape of the lighthouse in the distance - the lights of the town guiding me.

There was no one to stop me, no one to see me making my escape and it may have been pure luck but I'm sure Thor had the entire population of his kingdom and then some in that palace.

When I had reached the lighthouse, my skin sticky with perspiration and feet aching from my shoes - I didn't first notice that the lighthouse had been cleaned. I tried the light switch by the door and exhaled in relief. It was immaculate.

The floors were clean, the walls repainted a fresh white and there was furniture. A small couch and lamp in the centre of the room, a coffee table before it and in the far of the room a small table with two chairs. It had even smelt clean - of citrus and sea salt from the ocean.

Forgetting about the party and my disappearing act, I descended the creaking stairs which no longer creaked. Amongst the winding shelves were books, old and new and I stopped mid-step. Mine.

I choked on a sob and my face ached with a grin as my fingers traced the titles, hundreds of them. All mine. Worn from use, the familiar pages dog-eared or yellowed with age. Books from my childhood and books from my teenage years and even the most precious ones inscribed from my parents.

Heart in my throat I finally reached the landing to find the room above also clean and filled with more of my things. The bed was made in my white coverlet and handmade pillows and took up most of the room. The desk was empty save for an old lamp and small trinkets I recognised as mine.

These were my things. Things from my home. My comforts. I sank onto the bed and kicked off my shoes and fingered the coverlet with a soft smile. I drew my knees toward my chest and exhaled. It wasn't quite sadness which had me near tears, not for seeing these things which reminded me of the past - it felt like a wholeness. Seeing how they fit into my new life so easily.

This was Thor's doing. My father was so willing to impress me, make me feel safe here. He must have suspected already my discomfort in the palace, how empty and vast it had felt to me.

'Evangeline?' A voice called and I turned my head toward the low door where Loki leant against the frame.

And then my brief comfort shattered seeing him there amongst my things. It felt like he had intruded on me naked - he could see me now for who I was. It was unsettling.

I dropped my knees and my cheeks flushed bright red.

'I was about to head over.' I lied. I waited for him to leave. He didn't. He only crossed his arms over his chest and took in the space. I didn't want him entering the room or touching my things so I stood and headed toward the door but he did not shift to let me pass, his gaze only swept over me and my dress, and then he turned his back swiftly as he averted his gaze and stepped down several stairs.

He must have thought I wanted my privacy, maybe sifting through my thoughts again which I knew I had to have a hold on. How could I stop him from seeing them, though I also assumed my emotions were portrayed on my face.

I grabbed my heels from where I had discarded them by the bed and slipped them on and made my way to Loki. As I descended two steps he turned and looked up at me.

'You're not dressed.' he said with a furrowed brow, his gaze kept lowered.

'I didn't want to wear the gown Thor gave me. It didn't feel right to wear it.' I looked down at myself and shrugged, feeling the loose straps slip down my shoulders. I tugged them back up and stepped down another step but Loki didn't shift. His eyes slowly moved up my body and took in the gown. Was he embarrassed by me, was he expecting I wore the other gown? He himself was dressed in an all-black suit, formal but not his Asgardian garb.

I felt a mess, slowly unravelling in this small space with him so close. What was he doing standing there, did he want me to shove past him, did he hope I would get upset about my choice of dress? I was awaiting his words, eyes focused upon his mouth that when he spoke I had to drag my eyes up to meet his.

'That's a nightgown.' His blue eyes finally met mine though strangely, dark lashes fluttering as his gaze shifted anywhere but on me.

'No, it's not,' I let out a soft laugh and looked down at the sage dress. It was pure silk and though it was slightly low cut with loose straps and buttoned down the middle - it was definitely not a nightgown. I had to forgo underwear as my panty lines could be seen through the soft material.

I hadn't realised my hands had run down over my waist and fell flat against my hips. I felt my face heat. It wasn't really a nightgown, was it? I glanced over the buttons again, how they began at the crevice between my breasts and stopped midway down my thigh. The nightgown I had worn the previous night was not like this one, I felt myself grow hot. Being in that space alone with Loki had my mind dredge up torturous thoughts - dirty and threateningly all-consuming thoughts. I was only now more conscious of my lack of underwear. What the fuck was I wearing which had unsettled him so much, was it customary to avert your eyes when an Asgardian woman was in a silk gown?

'Excuse me,' I lifted the hair off the back of my neck with one hand and gestured for Loki to move. I had to get some fresh air. I had to go and see Thor and attend the party he was throwing for me. Loki watched my every movement as I tried to hide my mortification and turned my face away, dropping my hair just so as to hide behind it. Was I wearing some type of wedding consummation nightgown, was that why it was buttoned so - for easy access?

The stairs were too narrow for Loki to step to the side and let me pass so I had to push past him as he turned to his side and I on mine. I felt the heat of him and smelt him. God, he smelt good and it had me reeling so much that I actually inhaled loudly and my body betrayed me - face turning slightly to greet the origin of the smell.

'Eva,' Loki said my name like a warning and something deep in my belly curled. I liked the sound of my name on his lips. I continued down the steps and swiftly through the front door of the lighthouse, almost jumping down the outside steps. The door closed behind me and I flinched.

Loki walked beside me in all black, his height intimidating as with his silent treatment.

'I-' I began but Loki spoke at the same time.

'Thor was beginning to worry, he thought you might have run away.'

'I kind of did.' I answered.

'Everyone is waiting for you.' He said.

'Couldn't you just make it about you? I was assuming their shock from seeing you return for the hundredth time might have them forget about me.' It was meant to be a joke but Loki stopped walking beside me and I was forced to turn and look at him as he spoke,

'If this is something you don't want then you need to tell Thor.'

'What do you mean something I don't want? I didn't ask for the circus he's throwing or the gowns or the lessons on fighting.'

'Then what did you want?'

'A family,' I shrugged, 'I was given one and then they were taken. And now I choose you, and Thor. I could have easily turned away and said no to Thor and living here. But you're my family regardless. I'll have to learn to love you.'

'That does not mean I have to love the lifestyle.' I added before he could add a quick remark.

Loki nodded and spoke softly as he leant into me, hands in his pockets

'Does this mean you're abdicating?'

'You could only hope!' I chuckled and we continued our walk to the palace. Often we shared glances at one another, I was too nervous to make small talk with him and I think Loki was too cautious of what had happened in the lighthouse, how we would have to remain now. Distant but civil.

Though there was no blood shared between us and technically speaking he was Thor's brother. He was not my uncle. There would be no life lessons or doting from him on my behalf. I was a grown woman. There was nothing we could give one another.

Loki allowed me entrance to the palace first and kept behind me as we walked in. There were no trumpets or crowd fawning over me. The throne room and main hall were so packed I had to utter various excuse-me's and pardon's just so I could find Thor chatting amongst friends.

The music was far too loud so his voice boomed in the space. He was not in his traditional Asgardian clothing but in a long crimson coat, his hair tied back. When he saw me he grinned and clasped me around the shoulders.

'Evangeline, meet some of my friends.' Thor swept his hand at the motley crew of people before him.

A woman with dark hair and serious eyes cocked an eyebrow at me, two older men, one in a red cape and streaks of grey in his hair and the other much shorter with glasses and curled greying hair. Thor went through their names. Valkyrie, Dr. Strange, Bruce.

The other two with their heads turned to one another I had recognised easily before Thor even said their names.

Sam Wilson. Captain America.

Bucky Barnes. The Winter Soldier.

Everyone greeted me politely though the latter even with his bored stare had me flushed. Of course, I had a crush on Bucky Barnes. What images I had seen of him on TV with Sam or Steve had me drooling - he was my Avenger crush. Everybody had one.

It just so happened that he was much more attractive and intimidating in person. When Thor swept me through the room to greet other people I was a little disappointed I didn't have more time with the Avengers. Though what questions I would have asked I was unsure, even now so long after the Blip - the battles fought were not spoken about. It hurt everyone too much.

It was in the early hours of the morning when the crowd began to ease and most guests left. I had been paraded around proudly in Thor's arms as he boasted about having a daughter, being a father and his hopes for having me in New Asgard.

I was too anxious about making an impression I missed most of his words and instead smiled and nodded. I manage to get my hands on a drink and watch the guests enjoy themselves. Another four lonely drinks later and my head was swimming with confident thoughts about finding the Winter Solider and getting him alone. I had to examine my glass through a blurred vision to understand that I was drinking Asgardian liquor and not earth liquor. I was drunk.

I grinned to myself and took another sip, my muscles relaxed, body shifting slightly to the music. I wasn't that drunk. I could still think straight and my feet didn't ache anymore. Though the room felt hot and I wanted to lie down.

My eyes lingered on the back of a dark-haired man, when he turned I saw it was the same man from the morning training. His devastating blue eyes met mine and he strode toward me. I smiled when he stopped before me.

With a lowered head he introduced himself,

'Princess Evangeline, I would like to welcome you and introduce myself,' he offered his hand and I took it to where he lifted it to his lips and pressed a soft kiss, over my hand he met my eyes. I licked my lips.

'Kit Nielsson.'

'Nice to meet you,' I murmured too lost in his eyes.

'Could I get you another drink?' his eyes flitted to the drink in my hand and I let it slip through my fingers as he reached for the empty glass before it crashed to the floor between us and smashed. I was quick to kneel and reach for the glass not realising what I was doing before Kit's hand clasped around mine, the glass in my palm cutting into the skin.

Kit pulled me to stand my hand still in his grasp, his other hand on my wrist as I slowly opened my palm. Red flowed from the gash which was worse than I thought. Even at the sight of all the blood as it dripped to the floor, I didn't quite register the pain.

'I'm so sorry,' Kit paled and shook his head, his face kept turned down to examine the cut. I had thought he was laughing until his face turned back up toward me. He frowned and then my mind slowly caught up.

The sharp sting had turned into a deep burn and the blood came quicker now. My hand shook in his grasp. I tried to pull my hand back but Kit's grip was tight on my wrist. I was acutely aware of the warmth of his skin on mine, the rough feel of his palms calloused from training.

'Careful,' he uttered and gave me a reassuring look, his eyebrows pulled together in concern, 'We should get this cleaned up.'

'Okay,' I said.

'Where is your room?' Kit asked, his face was pale and his gaze kept flicking to the blood on my hand and now on his own fingers.

'Upstairs,' I gestured with my chin and he nodded, dropping my hand and placing a gentle hand on my back so I could lead the way.

'I'm so sorry,' I said to him, mortified and wanting to slink into bed.

'Please, don't be Princess Evangeline.' he shook his head quickly, 'This wasn't your doing.'

'What happened?' Loki appeared before me and took in my outstretched and bloodied hand, Kit beside me with his hand on my lower back. I closed my hand into a fist but Loki snatched my hand between his two to examine the cut.

'I dropped my glass.' I explained as his eyes dropped to Kit, narrowed in anger, or was it something else?

'You'll be fine.' Loki said but he was not looking at me but Kit, 'It should heal quickly.'

'Okay,' I said and Kit moved to have me lead him to my room.

'Let's get you cleaned up.' Kit said kindly and I was suddenly very aware of his hand on my lower back and the heat of his breath on my naked shoulder. I wanted to feel it against my lips, I wanted to see if he tasted like sweet liquor, if his pink lips were as soft as they had looked.

How soon would the cut heal? Would he be a gentleman and wait outside my room or would he come inside? I had a fleeting image of myself sitting on my bed, Kit knelt before me as he tended to my wound. And then there was a loss of clothes and the buttons of my dress being undone as Kit -

'I'll take her.' Loki smiled tightly.

'I wouldn't want to tear you away from the party.' Kit shrugged and he ran his clean hand through his brown curls. I was growing irritated with Loki's pettiness and suddenly very much wanted to follow Kit up to my room. My hand once again closed in a fist and there was only then a dull pain left, no more blood dripping.

Still, Loki held onto my hand, 'What kind of uncle would I be if I didn't look after my dear niece? I insist.'

Kit had no argument and shifted from me, only lowering his head to Loki, who was still Prince of Asgard and Kit's superior.

'But-' I began but in one swift movement, Loki was beside me, one hand still holding onto my wounded one, the other around my shoulders as he had me pressed to him to lead me through the room.

I hadn't even a chance to say thank you or goodbye to Kit as I was led down a hallway.

I shook Loki from me,

'What the fuck?' I shouted and he rolled his eyes at me.

'What?'

'You didn't have to do that. He was going to help me.'

Loki raised his brows, 'I'm certain he has no interest in stitching up your wound and tucking you into bed.'

'Well fortunately I was already dressed for bed,' I gestured to my dress and a muscle in Loki's jaw twitched. I shoved past him and stalked back down the hall but Loki sidestepped me with his long legs and stopped me.

'Absolutely not. Go to your room.'

'You're not my dad!' I tried to sidestep him again but he was a wall, too tall and strong for me to shift past. I growled low in my throat and did as he asked just to spite him, I would attempt to sneak back after he left.

He followed me to the floor where we shared our rooms and I stopped at my door hoping he disappeared and gave me a chance to flee.

'I hope you know I could just as easily sneak out once you're gone.' I tried to open my door but everything in front of me was blurred and my grip slipped several times until I realised I was using my bloodied hand, now the door was streaked in blood.

Loki tutted at me and gripped the handle, waiting to open it until I was forced to listen to him.

'You're drunk,' he snarled. 'What do you suppose was going to happen once he was up here with you?'

'What do you think was going to happen?' I snarled back, 'I was going to enjoy myself.'

'Eva..' And there was that dark tone of his, the way in which he said my name like a warning.

It must have been the alcohol in my system or knowing I had wasted an opportunity with Kit but I pushed back,

'Don't worry, I wouldn't have left too good an impression for him to ask for my hand in marriage.'

Loki pushed the door open and gestured inside.

'Goodnight.' he glanced at his hand, marked with my blood and tutted where it disappeared as if it had never marked his skin.

'Oh come on,' I breathed on him, pushing into his personal space. He peered down at me coldly through his lashes as I spoke,

'I thought you would have liked to see me make a fool of myself! You're the God of Mischief, aren't you supposed to promote drinking and fun and nonsense?'

'This is disobedience.' He rasped, 'Don't make a fool of yourself in front of my dear brother. Go to bed, Evangeline.'

I didn't move. It was driving him insane as I simply glared at him, a smirk playing on my lips at the absurdity of his words. What, suddenly he was so invested in not embarrassing Thor, his brother the king whose throne he wished to steal from beneath him?

'No.' I said and the air between us turned cold. Loki's skin turned pallid and near blue, his eyes turning blood red.

I was not fearful of him. I should have been. He had killed more powerful beings than me for far pettier reasons I was sure.

'I will count to three.' He warned.

'Make it two.' I shoved my hands against him but he did not shift. His form was solid.

'One,' he began and I felt my drunken amusement turn into sloppy anger. Unfocused but my mind buzzed like static. How dare he taunt me, belittle me like this. I was not a child. He was not in charge of me. He was not my father. Not my uncle. He was infuriating in his seriousness.

'Two.' I finished for him with a raised brow and then I was scooped up into his arms in one swift movement as he threw me over his shoulder and marched into my room, slamming the door behind him and stalking over to my bed.

I yelled incoherent words as I struggled in his grasp and he dropped me onto my back onto the bed, looking over me in the dark as I sprawled up on my hands.

'Are you fucking serious?' I asked.

'Clearly,' he replied.

I held back a string of curses and complaints as I shifted forward to leave but Loki was leaning over me, his knee between my thighs, I was conscious of how my dress had lifted when I felt the fabric of his trousers. His arms caged either side of me and I was forced to move backward, nearly on my back.

'I suggest that until you come into your power you do as I say. Or suffer the consequences.'

His face was mere inches from mine and his eyes had returned to their normal colour though through the shadows of moonlight coming in from the balcony, I could see the hard plains of his face and there was something which had me terrified about his threat. It was very much real.

Beneath him, I could feel the weight of him, the press of his body against mine. Would he hurt me here? He was a God capable of anything. I still had a doubt he would do anything, I was his brother's daughter, if he had killed me - what would Thor do? Would he confess or claim it was an accident?

The words bubbled from my mouth drunkenly, 'Go on then, tell me the consequences.'

'Humiliation,' his voice was deep and raspy and that's when I felt it, his hand snaking up my thigh, fingers soft and warm. I kept still, my heart in my throat and his eyes locked upon mine in the dark.

I felt my cheeks burn and chest lift to press into his as fingers crept higher and my breath hitched as they met the wetness between my thighs. Beneath the thin material of my dress, I felt my nipples harden and ache, wanting his mouth on my breasts, the silk to be burnt away by his touch. Loki said nothing as two of his fingers dragged over my slit. I lifted my hips slightly and his face was all seriousness, a small smirk playing on his lips.

And then his fingers slipped inside of me treacherously slowly and I moaned, my breath on his lips. And like I had burnt him Loki pulled away so quickly that I was left dazzled, half-laid upon the bed my dress lifted up to my hips.

I righted my dress and said nothing, my body on fire from his touch, hoping that if I said nothing he would return and continue. He stood there in the dark and I felt his gaze upon me and the air was stiff, I felt his anger ripple across to me. My reaction was not what he had wanted. He had wanted me to push him away and hurt him and swear at him.

Though as I lie there, I imagined that this was what he had planned all along. Was he making me want him, only to reject me and truly humiliate me, make me feel unwanted?

'Get out.' I said. I wasn't sure if it was a laugh he was stifling as he turned on his heel and slammed the door behind him.

Chapter Text

The next day I was summoned by Thor without any further explanation. To say I was nervous was an understatement. I couldn't even swallow down my breakfast and had to retie the straps of my dress four times - my hands shook furiously.

I was expecting he knew about what had happened between Loki and myself in my room. Though I tried to convince myself otherwise as a chambermaid led me to another wing of the palace

Had Loki rattled to Thor about being in my rooms? Had he twisted the story, had he said I tried to come onto him? My mind wandered back to last night, though really the images of him over me, touching me never left my mind. My skin still burned with his touch. And I wanted more.

I knew it was wrong. He was Thor's brother and Thor was my biological father. I would have said it was frowned upon, but still I shared no blood with him and he hadn't raised me. He was a stranger.

The chambermaid opened a door and gestured for me to go inside. I thanked her and as the door closed behind me I took in the room.

Mimicking the colour scheme and grandeur of the rest of the palace - the room was scattered with lush furnishings. Two deep red chaise lounges faced one another in the centre of the room, to the left of the room sat floor to ceiling bookcases though sparsely filled and to the right a heavy mahogany desk with intricate golden legs.

It was not Thor standing hunched over the desk but Loki. I froze. His eyes met mine and immediately he frowned.

'What are you doing here?' He asked brusquely.

'Thor called for me.' I said quietly and began to wonder if Loki really was going to tell Thor of our encounter. Though it had been inappropriate it wouldn't happen again. Surely. And Loki hadn't wanted it like I did. He wasn't the one laid half naked upon the bed. I began to wonder if it was all part of an elaborate plan, if he really had wanted me to tell Thor, if this was some kind of fucked up mind game to make me feel vile and flee from the palace.

I wouldn't. Where would I go?

'Right,' he straightened to his full height and crossed his arms over his chest. He was wearing all black again his sleeves pulled up to his forearms and tie loosened. There were dark circles under his eyes and it was then I realised he was in the same clothes as the previous night. Had he not slept or partied through?

'You haven't slept.' It was not a question.

Loki shrugged, 'I've far more important things to do.'

I continued to watch him and moved over to the desk but he held his hand out before him, gesturing me to stop.

'My lack of sleep has nothing to do with you.'

'I wasn't even going to mention last night.' But now the issue had been brought up I was acutely aware of how we were in this room alone. And that the only thing between us was the desk.

Was he thinking the same, did he think I was making my way over him to touch him, to try and seduce him?

'How's your hand?' The abrupt change in subject irritated me. I held out my palm before me to see it unmarked and clean. No evidence of last nights wound.

I closed my palm and dropped my hand back to my side.

'You know what, maybe I do want to talk about what happened.' I said lifting my chin at him defiantly.

'Absolutely not.' He scowled. I moved around the desk to stand beside him and waited for him to face me but he only cast me a sideward glance and ignored me. I didn't believe his contempt.

'Is this all a part of your grand scheme? Return home, repair your relationship with Thor and try to reclaim the throne?'

That did have him turning, 'That is awfully bold of you to assume my return to Asgard - New Asgard - was anything but genuine. I wanted to see my brother I didn't think it possible he would have fathered a child - not so young.'

'So now you're trying your best to get rid of me.' I said matter of factly.

'Oh Evangeline,' Loki cooed condescendingly, 'I'm flattered really that you think I would have to even try to get rid of you.'

I gritted my teeth and not knowing what to do with my arms, crossed them so I mirrored him. We stood there like that for a few moments, a grin growing on Loki's face as my face flushed hot.

'Why are you back, really?' I asked willing myself to calm down and stop the drumming of my heart. I couldn't let him win, his taunting words from the previous night about humiliating me echoed in my mind.

Something small flickered in his cold eyes, was it fear, dread? Whatever it was I had seen it and he knew as he stepped backward and exhaled through his nostrils.

'Loki,' I asked seriously as I stepped toward him, 'What is it you're running from?'

I had to know. It would help me figure out his angle, how he would undermine me in the future. Or in general how I could best avoid him. I no longer believed he wanted to be civil, hell I never believed that he ever wanted to be anything but vicious toward me. But was that really the meaning behind his touch - it hadn't felt malicious.

'You shouldn't meddle in things you have no comprehension of, darling.' He answered.

I shrugged, 'For someone so fond of attention, you've been awfully quiet since your arrival, where are your stories of triumph and defeat, how you managed after six years to return home? I'm not an idiot.'

'You act like one.' He smirked and tried to deflect my prying with callous words.

'I can see right through you.' I looked over his face: the ticking jaw, the lowered brows, the small lines between his brows as he frowned down at me.

'No one sees me.' His voice was venomous, eyes hard on mine 'Not unless I want them to.'

'You're so empty.' I uttered and it was meant to be to myself. I pitied him, how ancient he was and how lost he still was in the universe. A villain didn't become one for the sake of it, they were molded with the hands which had once embraced them.

It was a slip up, I hadn't even thought he would react as he did but Loki's hands grasped my arms and he spun me so my back was pressed against the desk and he stood over me.

'What do you know of emptiness? Your sadness is shallow.'

His chest heaved in anger against mine and his fingers grasped my arms tightly but I did not recoil from him even as I felt the heat of his breath upon my face and the ice in his eyes on my own.

'Then slit my fucking throat and see how shallow it is.'
I raised my chin to him, testing him, my eyes unblinking locked upon his own which narrowed in surprise at my words, how I didn't recoil from him.

How dare he question my pain. Just because it was different from his own didn't make it hurt less. He may have been empty but I was familiar with the deep darkness of grief and hate.

I would not let him belittle me because of the infinite differences between us. Even as he was a God and I was other, I was not weak.

His hands dropped from me with a short exhale of his breath. As he couldn't believe my words but I was not bluffing as I snatched one of his hands and pressed it to my throat.

'Go on then,' I whispered, staring at his widened eyes and parted lips. His eyes flickered to his hand around my throat and I curled my fingers tighter around his own so they squeezed slightly to make my own words come out breathy,

'Don't you ache for it? To rid yourself of me?'

There was an openness on his face, an innocence which I had never thought I would have seen there as he tried to pull his hand back but I grasped his wrist with my other hand and he was forced to look down at me staring up at him. He was still wordless.

He must have known it was me who had the power, that it ended with me choosing if I would live or die.

His face softened, the hard plains of his face softening into something more human, his facade dropping.

'Eva,' and it was my name on his lips which had me dropping his hand, I needed to rid myself of him and stop this crazy game.

But his hand still remained there around my throat but looser, his fingertips still brushing my skin and burning me. I knew he could feel my pulse pound against his fingertips.

He ran a tongue across his bottom lip and lowered his gaze to look at my own lips where I subconsciously copied his action and then his hand dropped from my skin and he leant down to me and I thought he might kiss me but instead he sighed and stalked away with a deep sigh as the door opened and heavy footsteps echoed in the room.

Thor stalked in with his face set into a serious glare. I glanced over my shoulder to Loki who now perched on one of the chaise lounges, his back to me. He said nothing and Thor must have noticed the tension because instead of greeting us he looked straight to his brother,

'What did you do?'

Loki turned his head to look at Thor and sneered,

'Me? You're so quick to assume I've caused trouble.'

'Because it is always you causing trouble.' Thor cocked a brow at him but Loki put his hands up in defeat.

I bit down hard on my tongue to keep from saying anything as Thor cast me a knowing glance, like my few lonely minutes with Loki had been the cause of the heat in the room.

Instead I just shrugged and kept my place as Thor frowned at the two of us but our silence was deafening to him as he went and sat opposite Loki on the other couch. He gestured me over and I did as he asked to keep the suspicion away from Loki.

I kept standing however as Thor spoke and kept my eyes from wandering to Loki as I'm sure he did his own.

'There may not be an easy way to say this,' he began

'Evangeline isn't your daughter?' Loki quipped.

Thor shook his head but Loki cut him off again,
'You've discovered a way to marry her off?'

It was joke which no one laughed at. Thor swallowed and his eyes flickered toward me and then down at his feet and Loki reclined back on the lounge.

'You have found your dear daughter a husband then?'

'Not quite.' Thor answered and I pushed off the desk to round it and move closer to Thor.

'You're not fucking serious?!'

I wasn't scolded for my language knowing Thor's mouth ran worse than mine. It was Loki who raised a brow at my father expecting he scold me.

'Thor,' I warned, feeling myself heat with anger, or was it anxiety?

'Don't worry, I'm not marrying you off. If anything he would be marrying into the family as you are heir to the Asgardian throne.'

'What are you talking about?' I shouted as Loki was on his feet and said at the same time,

'You're joking.'

Thor didn't like us standing over us so stood too so the three of us faced off. Our anger mixed and turned the air sour.

Thor's hands raised as he spoke, 'I knew that upon bringing you here Eva, you would have many suitors and I couldn't just let you marry anyone.'

'You have absolutely no choice over who I marry.'

'He does.' Loki nodded to himself and once again folded his arms over his chest and turned his head toward me though his eyes meandered.

'As King of New Asgard and your father, he must give you his blessing for who you choose to wed.'

'That's so old-fashioned. What if I want to marry for love and not convenience?'

'I never said you can't choose.' Thor added and finally met my eyes.

'No, only that I have to choose right.'

'Your husband will be Prince Consort of New Asgard, upon the commencement of your vows he will become a true Asgardian.'

My mind doesn't comprehend what he was saying so I looked to Loki for an explanation and thankfully he did,

'A God. In his own right. Like us.' Loki shrugged and his eyes flickered toward me and away again. That small crease between his brows forming.

'Oh,' is all I could say. Because I hadn't thought things through upon accepting my place as Princess of New Asgard. I was half-mortal but Thor had assured me I would live a long and near-immortal life matched to those surviving Asgardians.

I had imagined it to be lonely, I had ached for a family of my own upon realising my own was never coming back. Though I played the fantasy in my mind and craved companionship, I knew it was too far from reach. How could I age slowly and watch loved ones live and die? It seemed like a cruel fate. So that's all it remained in my mind these past few months.

But now... this was different, I actually had a choice. I could create the life I wanted with a husband and children and Thor would assist me in doing so. They would share my life with me, I would not outlive them. I could have everything I wanted. I could once again create a home and a safe place - I didn't have to settle for solitude.

My mind ticked over and I nodded to myself, taking an eager step toward Thor,
'Who is it? Did someone say something?'

There was a giddiness expanding in my chest at the thought of it. The romance, the happiness I could experience again. It could be my opportunity at life again. I tried to hide the smile in my eyes.

'Whoa,' Loki pointed to me, 'You can't possibly have him arrange your marriage.'

'I'm not arranging her marriage, I'm just putting forward a suggestion.'

'Who?' Loki and I said at the same time.

'Sir Khristophe Nielsson.'

Loki let out a sharp laugh and Thor exhaled loudly and I looked between the two of them.

'Who is that?'

Loki smirked to himself and tried to hide his amusement, his head twirled to me,
'Don't you know what Kit is short for?'

I ignored him to stop my cheeks from burning bright red and I addressed Thor.
'He asked you to marry me?'

'No, he just made a passing comment about keeping his eyes on you when I'm taking a leave of absence.'

'Oh,' I fingered the soft material of my dress and averted my eyes from the two men staring my way waiting for a reaction.

'You're leaving?' Loki asked. This caught my attention as Thor sat once again.

'Temporarily. It shouldn't be for long. There are some things I need to see to.'

'So let me go,' Loki pushed.

'You've just got back. This is something I need to do.'

'You can't leave.' I uttered and felt a deep pressing on my chest, 'I just got here. You can't go.'

'I apologise but it won't be for too long. A couple of weeks or months at the most.'

'No.' I breathed and moved toward him, 'You can't leave me here. You're my dad, you're meant to look after me and protect me and you've got twenty-five years of fathering to make up to me.'

Thor's face resembled a father's guilt with his lowered eyes, tight mouth and slumped shoulders, though his words were that of a king,

'It is my duty to serve and protect New Asgard and its people. I must keep my word to do so, I'm sorry Eva.'

Bewildered I bit down on my tongue to keep myself from throwing hateful words at him and also to keep the tears welling in my vision from spilling down my face. I wanted also to ask him the importance of his 'mission', where he was going and why and who with. I didn't though because I knew my words would pour out and I would end up an emotional mess as Loki would probably be amused by it and I couldn't handle more humiliation.

'Loki will look after you.' Thor added.

'I will not.' Loki snarled.

'I'll be fine.' I said.

'It's not a suggestion.' Thor shrugged. 'While I am absent, Eva is regent. Loki, you will advise her.'

'If anything I should rule in your absence, dear brother.'

Thor only gave a humorous look to Loki as he continued to speak. I had to refrain from rolling my eyes at his poor attempts at once again trying to usurp me.

'I mean the girl isn't accustomed to our values and way of life. I am older and of course wiser. I know our people and how to rule them. I beg you, Thor, rethink this.'

Loki's words were pleading and his face remained open. He wanted Thor's trust and a chance to redeem himself amongst the people of New Asgard - whether to prove he was still powerful or a threat I wasn't sure.

Thor addressed me, 'Eva, I need a moment to speak to my brother, alone.'

I strode out without a word or reaction feeling something akin to rejection. I did manage to slam the door behind me as I strode down the empty hall and down the stairs, making my way outside in an attempt to calm myself from combusting.

So that was it? Thor was already abandoning me and I was left to be babysat by Loki and Khristophe - Kit - who also suggested to my father that he would be a suitable husband.

Originally I was flattered but now I was furious.

What was the point of being a daughter of the God of Thunder, why was I still seen as weak. Why did Thor bring me here when he was going to leave and not even try to help me discover my powers or even bother being my father!

I knew it had something to do with a prophecy but Thor had only told me twice about it. Though even those times his words had been meaningless and he hadn't told me the actual words his mother, Frigga - my grandmother - had told him.

It bothered him though that he couldn't tell me, I knew that much from the deep frown on his face whenever it was mentioned. It had to do with me being his daughter.

Though I still wasn't sure if he was trying to prevent the prophecy from happening or if he wished it to come to fruition.

An inkling of an idea bloomed in my mind and though foolish and really fucking dangerous, I knew I had to go through with it.

I had to follow Thor to wherever he was going. Loki would help me I was sure, it meant he could play king for a little while. And I could put as much distance between us as possible.

Chapter Text

I did what I did best. I retreated. Back to the lighthouse in solitude while I tried and failed to come up with a way to leave with Thor.

I couldn't do it. Maybe my quitting was brought on by being surrounded by my old things. I didn't want to wander into any more unknowns in my life, I wanted safety and security and I knew I should have put more faith in Thor. He was going to do his best to protect me I was sure of it.

So I would stay and sulk and gather my energy to stay and try and build a somewhat normal life. The silence of the lighthouse and wind pressing against the window pane had me drifting off into a deep sleep before I awoke later in the afternoon and decided to head down to the beach.

It was still warm and the beach was scattered with few other people. I stood facing the horizon with my toes wiggling in the sand and arms pressed tightly around myself. My loneliness felt bittersweet. I hadn't wanted to be bothered standing there in the heat of the sun, but at the same time I craved attention, someone to ask what I was - not how - standing there, woman, girl or prospective goddess.

I walked the stretch of the beach until I reached the small pier where several boats had docked, fishermen bringing in their nets and joking loudly with one another.

Curious as to what they had caught I found myself shifting closer, the smell of fish and salt strong and I wrinkled my nose and turned but smacked into someone. The front of my dress turned cold and wet, I let out a sharp gasp at the sight of blood and guts running down the front of the white cotton.

'Oh my god!' I tried to wipe most of it from my skin but my hands became coated and slick with it. I suppressed a gag but at the whiff of the smell, I let one out followed by a cough. My hands held out awkwardly in front of me.

The stranger holding the bucket let out a deep laugh.

'You've gotta watch where you're going.' He said and I couldn't even look at him as I focused upon the mess on my front and wanted to fling myself into the ocean. Though I didn't want to risk making myself shark bait.

'Is this blood?!' Not that I was someone who got faint at the sight of blood but as it coated my skin I swear I could feel it congealing and I wondered if it would leave a smell.

'Mainly fish guts. Don't worry it's not in your hair. The smell should go in a few days.'

My eyes widened at the stranger and I was met with a broad white smile and eyes sparkling with amusement. He placed the bucket by his feet and didn't bother hiding his laughter as he straightened with his hands held up as if in surrender. Probably because I looked like I might start screaming or crying.

'I'm kidding. I'm sorry. Can I help you clean it off?'

'No.' I replied and he dropped his hands still smiling at me, his hands in his pockets. We stared at one another, him with a hidden smile and me with a burning face and fingers itching to be washed.

I nodded, 'Yes, please actually.'

It's like he knew I would cave and turned to walk towards a tackle box sitting a little way away. He knelt down and scrambled through the box and began making small talk as I stood beside him.

'How are you finding New Asgard?' He asked.

'Fine.' I answered hoping he wouldn't supply me with more than a wet wipe or some water. I took the chance to look him over. He had a mess of brown hair which was beginning to grey. Though his neat beard wasn't grey, he was older than me by at least a decade, there were smile lines around his eyes and as he looked down I could see how dark his lashes were.

'And the lighthouse?'

'How do you know-' I began but he looked up to me, his finger gesturing to it in the distance.

'I've seen you coming and going. I've never seen anyone there before.' He shrugged and met my gaze.

He blinked once and I held my hands out to him. He held two small containers in his hands but still, he didn't offer them to me and seemed to be awaiting my answer.

It must have been the light but his eyes were near blue as the water, clear and pretty and eerily similar to the cerulean of Kit's. In fact, looking at him, they shared similar features though this man was more rugged where Kit was neat.

'It needs some love.' I hoped my answer would be enough. It seemed to be as he looked at me for one-second longer and nodded in agreement.

'You'll have to let me in. To see it. I'm sure I can take a look at anything that's broken.'

It felt cliched the way I flinched as one of his hands took my upturned palm softly. Even his words were worthy of an eye roll for having a double meaning. Or maybe I was just looking into things too much as I began to notice how attractive he was.

He scattered some powder over both of my palms and then opened the other bottle.

'Cup your hands.' He said and I did. Watching him intently as he knelt before me and poured some liquid into my palm where they sizzled.

I flinched but he held my upturned palms in his.

'Easy, it's just vinegar. It should temporarily get rid of the smell before you take a bath.'

'Shower.' I corrected.

He laughed and cocked a brow at me, 'Wow, Princess. I didn't think they had those in the palace.'

'Hang on. You know who I am?'

He seemed unbothered by it and stood, my palms still in his.

'It's only a title, our King is rather informal so I supposed you were too. That and you are a bit of a recluse. I thought you maybe didn't want to be bothered.'

'Well-' I began but realised he was kind of right.

'You can call me Eva then.' I said. I caught the smile forming at the corners of his mouth. It made my own smile form and he saw this and dropped his gaze from my eyes to my hands.

'Eva.' He repeated in a low voice, 'Close to Eve of Eden. The first woman. You are Eva of New Asgard.'

'That's a little bold, don't you think?'

He shrugged and dropped his hands from mine to reach around and grab a cloth from his back pocket. He looked up at me through his lashes as he wiped my hands softly,
'Not as bold as introducing myself by sloshing fish guts all over you.'

He laughed as he saw my face screw up in annoyance, 'I'm sure that I've been the rudest welcome you've had to New Asgard?'

'Barely.' My mind wandered to Loki and subconsciously my head turned toward the palace in the near distance, eyes meandering over the golden spires and empty balconies. Was he there? What was he plotting now? Was he alone in his rooms? Did he even have friends here?

'Done.' the man said and I turned my head back to him to see my hands cleaned and dropped them awkwardly to my sides with a thank you.

'Where'd you go?' he asked with a cocked brow.

'What do you mean?' I asked. He gestured toward the palace.

'Not in a rush to get back?'

'Absolutely not.' I exhaled and while inhaling grimaced, glancing down at my chest and the fish guts still there, 'Though I should probably go and shower before I begin to repulse the entire town.'

'Sorry, about this.' He gestured to the mess on my dress.

'I'm sure they'll just make me a new one.' I hesitated and felt myself lingering, waiting for him to say something else but he just smirked at me and I felt my cheeks heat.

'Okay, bye.' I did an awkward half-wave and made my way back down the pier toward the town.

'Kit!' he called out from behind me.

I turned and had to shield my eyes from the sun, 'What?'

He was half-turned to me as if he had hesitated about telling me the name, was he telling me he knew about Kit's proposal to Thor? Was it a warning?

He finally made his way over to me and offered his hand before me,

'My name's Kit.'

'No, it's not.' I laughed unless Kit was a common name amongst Asgardians or a pet name.

He did not drop his hand, though there was confusion in his eyes as if he was questioning my denial of his name.

'It's Khristophe,' he dropped his hand, 'So I suppose you're right. You can call me whatever you want, but most call me Kit.'

'What's your last name?' I probed, 'It's not Nielsson is it?'

His brows raised in surprise, this time crossing his arms over his chest and as he did this I noticed his tanned forearms and how tight the shirt was over his biceps.

'Have you been watching me, Princess?'

'Your name isn't Khristophe Nielsson.' I said.

'Yes, it is.'

'No it isn't.' And my mind pulled up images of the Kit I had met, sure there were similarities but they weren't the same person. I wasn't making things up, I had met an entirely different man. So maybe they were related, cousins or maybe strangers who just so happened to share the same name in a town of fifty-thousand or so humans and Asgardians.

'It is. Do you mean to tell me we've met?' He said amused.

I wanted to say yes but I only shook my head and took a step back to stare at him.

'Did you make a proposal to Thor?'

Kit, or Khristophe or whoever he was made a strange face - his amusement turning to confusion as his eyes narrowed,

'I'm a little lost as to what's happening here.'

I decided to explain best as I could. 'I met someone called Kit Nielsson, last night actually at my welcoming party. It wasn't you, but the same man - I assume it's the same man - offered to marry me.'

'Do you want it to be me?' he teased and his words did something to me, my pulse accelerating and my breath becoming shallower.

'He's Asgardian.' I added and looked this Kit up and down as if such a glance could determine if he was mortal or Asgardian. It wasn't so simple to tell, though Thor and Loki could do it with a glance. I still struggled to understand in human years how old my father would have been when I was conceived.

'So am I. Though I might start to doubt it if you keep looking at me like that.'

I knew that Kit had meant it as a tease but his words were doing something to me, making me feel and want again and I was far too embarrassed to flirt with this man while half-covered in fish guts and probably stinking up the pier as I stood underneath the sun.

He must have sensed this because he offered his hand again and I took it, he shook my hand firmly and I felt myself smile at his touch as he did the same. Though I'm sure his smile was not secretly hiding dirty thoughts like mine was and how I imagined I might need help cleaning myself off when I got back to the palace.

'I'm sorry again, about the mess.' he said and our hands were still clasped together.

'I'll see you around, Kit.' I dropped my hand and he gave me a small nod before I walked away, a quick glance over my shoulder proved he was still watching me.

Chapter Text

I tried to keep my pace somewhat normal as I left the pier and ventured to the palace, my head kept down as whispers and confused looks followed me. Though I was in no mood to stop and explain that what looked to be blood on my dress was not mine, or anyone else's .

Even the ever silent guards gave me suspicious glances as I passed through the palace gardens and gates. I put Fisherman Kit's identical name to that of Warrior Kit's down to coincidence. I knew when and if I ever saw Warrior Kit again I would ask him, that and turn down his marriage proposal. So, sooner than later.

I was thankful the palace was quiet as usual and headed down the hall to my rooms but as I turned a corner I smacked into something and groaned loudly.

'For fuck sake,' I mumbled and took a step back to look up to see Loki looking down at me, the scowl on his face morphing into a look of disgust and then quickly concern as he moved toward me swiftly and his hands pressed softly against my waist.

'Eva, what has happened?' he breathed.

I looked down at my chest, 'Oh, it was just a fisherman at the pier.' I rattled on about meeting another Kit Nielsson but Loki didn't hear the rest of my words as one of his palms pressed flat against my chest and moved downward to cover the distance of the stain.

I remained frozen at his touch and his other hand tightening on my waist.

'Who did this?' he asked but I could only watch his face, the deepening lines on his forehead and the twitching muscle in his jaw as he moved his hand over my chest and I tried to pull back from him as my nipples hardened and I was hoping that the stain covered enough of my so that they wouldn't show through my dress. I didn't dare look down.

'Eva, who did this to you?' Loki's eyes met mine and it was noticeable how his eyes began to shift from baby blue to red like they were slowly being bled of their colour to crimson.

'Kit Nielsson. But another one. It's not my blood.' I answered, my voice barely above a whisper. I had to keep from breathing properly in fear that my entire body would shake while he held me.

Loki's hands didn't move from me, one hand pressed flat against my chest, the other around my waist. Surely he could feel my pounding heart, how hot I was becoming in his touch? I tried to retain my thoughts, he was only concerned that I had hurt myself, that was reasonable, I wasn't yet full Asgardian, Loki was my charge. Really he was covering his own ass.

Loki sharply inhaled through his nose and finally put some distance between us and his nose scrunched up from the smell of fish.

'What do you mean another one?' his hands were no longer on me and he stood right back, arms crossed over his chest.

'I-' I began but he continued to talk,

'Whose blood is it, and why do you stink of fish?'

'Listen,' I refrained from stomping my foot at him like a child as he began to look at me like one, only waiting to scold me and send me on my way.

'I went for a walk on the pier and I bumped into someone and he sloshed fish guts all over me. He told me his name was Kit Nielsson. I thought that was ridiculous so I got confused but he assured me that's really his name.'

'Cute little story.' Loki uncrossed his arms to glance at his hands and screwed up his face at the smears of fish guts on them.

Knowing that this conversation would go no further I began to head back toward my room and heard Loki's footsteps echo behind my own. I stopped before I ascended the staircase.

'Where is my dad?' I asked.

'Dad?' he feigned naivety and it took everything in me not to sigh or roll my eyes or throw my hands up.

'Thor.' I bit back.

'Right. Funny how I keep forgetting you're actually related to him.' his eyes flickered with mischievousness. 'He's gone.'

'What do you mean he's gone?' I knew what he meant the moment I asked and my stomach swirled anxiously as I had to swallow the bile back down my throat.

'He flew away.' Loki said and as I only stared at him, 'No, quite literally. In a spaceship.'

I felt the world grow smaller, the pounding in the back of my skull and my incapacity to draw in a proper breath making it worse. I had to put some distance between Loki and myself and his teasing and inevitable nastiness. I shook my head but spoke aloud, more to myself than Loki.

'I was at the lighthouse.' as if it explained he couldn't just leave without saying goodbye, I wasn't in the palace, he would have known that. I didn't even get a courtesy goodbye.

'Why?' Loki asked.

I hadn't realised I had backed up to the steps until I felt them knock against the back of my leg, my hand white-knuckled and grasping the banister.

'What?' my thoughts were spiralling about being here left alone and I tried to tell myself I was safe and protected but really I was trying to stop myself from sinking into the deep feelings of abandonment, of something bad happening to Thor and him not returning. What if I never got to say goodbye?

'-lighthouse?' I only caught the last word of Loki's sentence but still, I was shaking my head and he must have thought I was shaking my head at him and not my scattered thoughts.

'I can't.' I said and pushed past Loki to move quickly back down the hall. I had to just get away and breathe and think and calm myself down. I wouldn't have Loki laughing in my face or taunting me any longer.

I didn't realise until a short while later that I was heading toward the training room. To do what, I wasn't sure but I must have taken a wrong turn or descended the stairs too far because the room before me was a dead end.

It was not as welcoming as the rest of the palace and much less grand. Cold stone surrounded me and to my left and right sat small alcoves vacant save for empty pedestals which I suspected housed some sort of trophies or artefacts.

Though my breath still came in shallow bursts, my mind was distracted and intrigued enough to keep me moving forward, at the far end of the room sat a pedestal with a singular small-item resting on its surface. Upon closer inspection, it looked to be a type of amulet without the chain. Red flat stone in the centre with a gold frame, its four corners jutting out like sharp horns.

I was tempted to touch it but knew that if it was down here, out of the public's view then it was dangerous or had the potential to be. Still, I only wanted to reach out and touch it once but at risk of harming myself or imminent death, I refrained.

I heard the echo of footsteps behind me and I turned to be greeted by Loki, half down the stairs,

'Stop.' he warned.

'I wasn't going to.' I said, 'I don't want to risk death over a silly little necklace.'

He made his way down the stairs and toward me like he didn't trust me and I moved aside so that he could view the artefact. Whatever it was.

'Is it Frigga's?' I asked, watching him inspect it, though his long fingers hovered they never touched the item. He looked at me funny and shook his head. Probably realising that his mother was my grandmother.

'No. I've never seen this.'

'Maybe Thor brought it down here?'

'Everything was destroyed during Ragnarok.' Loki uttered and he went someplace far away in his thoughts, I lowered my gaze and gave him that small moment to grieve his home in peace.

'This is new.' he said and looked to me, I looked up to him expecting turmoil or sadness in his eyes but instead, I was met with wide eyes and a grin on his face. It caught me off guard as his hand once again reached forward for the amulet but I let out a gasp of shock and grabbed his hand to stop him from touching it.

'You don't know what it does!' I hissed at him but he snatched his hand away and I knew he would grab for it again so I did first and our eyes met before landing on my hand and the amulet I was grasping.

Nothing happened but still, I held my breath at the cool touch of it against my skin and the small vibrations it sent through me.

'Oh my god.' I breathed.

'Evangeline. Put it down.'

'What if this is a trap?' I met Loki's widened eyes and he spoke quietly and calmly.

'Put it down. Nothing will happen if it hasn't already.'

'But what if I put it down and something happens. It's vibrating.'

'Just put it down.' Loki warned and I dropped it onto the pedestal where the clatter echoed in the empty space around us. After several moments when nothing happened, we both exhaled in relief.

'What the hell is this place anyway?' I asked.

Loki turned his head and looked around the space.
'It's a replica of Odin's Vault. In Asgard, it was where he housed weapons and other things.'

I left Loki to elaborate though I was certain the old Vault unknowingly housed the Space Stone. He began to walk away from me and back down the length of the room, his head sweeping left to right in what I supposed was him checking the other empty alcoves. He stopped at the bottom of the stone stairs and walked back to me to inspect the last two alcoves set behind the centre pedestal.

Loki's shoulders hunched as he strode toward the alcove to my left.

'There.' he uttered and pointed his finger.

When I turned, there was only another empty alcove and pedestal.

'There's nothing there.' I told him but still moved toward the space in front of him to prove a point, Loki pushed me aside and walked around the pedestal where his frown deepened.

I glanced at the floor to see if there was an indication of something broken but instead found several small drops of blood, easy to place against the light grey stone floor. Panicked, my heart sped up and as I moved toward Loki to see what he was now looking at on the other side of the stone pedestal his head shot up quickly at my approach, one hand held up to stop me from coming any further but my curiosity got the best of me.

Back pressed against the pedestal, a man sat slumped over, his head lowered so I could not see his face. He was unconscious, though my eyes remained glued to his chest awaiting the soft rise and fall which indicated he was alive. There was blood which I could see, I didn't want to see his face. I also wanted to which only made my hands shake violently by my sides.

Loki said nothing as he kicked out his foot and there was no response from the man but he fell toward Loki and onto his back. Loki stepped back with a tut and I caught sight of the man's face.

It was Kit. The one from the training room and the party. Warrior Kit. Though where his eyes should have been were empty black holes, blood trailing down his cheeks and his mouth slightly open. That explained the blood on the floor. But shouldn't there have been more, where were his eyes?

My stomach churned and I gagged once and once again smelling the scent of fish still on me, I swallowed down the bile in the back of my throat.

I needed a shower and to flee from this place.

'He's dead.' I choked out, my throat burning and acidic.

'Obviously,' Loki made a face that suggested I should have been more familiar with dead bodies such as he was.

'Can we go?' I asked and half-turned from where Loki stood over Kit's body.

'I suppose he can't really keep his eyes on you anymore can he?' Loki chuckled.

I shot Loki a glare and he hid a smile, both his hands buried deep in his pockets.

'Strange though, that his death came so suddenly after asking for your hand. It's even more so a coincidence that you came down here where I happened to find him.'

'I didn't kill him!' I threw my hands up exasperated. 'What the hell would I gain from killing him?!'

Loki shrugged and prodded Kit's body and I once again had to avert my eyes.

'Maybe you intended to blame someone else for this?'
He pointed a thumb to himself.

'If you think I'm afraid of you then you really don't know me as well as you think you do. '

Loki cocked a brow at me, 'Well enough to know how to make your cunt wet, Evangeline.'

My entire body burned and my cheeks heated. I kept Loki's gaze and had to bite back my own equally filthy words.

'Don't say shit like that.' I tried to make my words firm but my voice wavered and Loki caught onto this as he stepped over Kit's body and moved toward me, I had no choice but to back up as he leant down, eyes narrowed on mine.

'Why, does it make you feel vile?'

I wasn't sure if he wanted the truth or a lie or from me or to say nothing but being so close to him and having him stand over me, smelling his scent and remembering his soft touch made me lose any sense of control.

'No.' I sighed.

There was his breath on my face, not as warm as I expected and the room was so quiet as we stared at one another and I wanted to be kissing him and pulling on his hair and climbing him like a fucking tree and he was so god damn intoxicating and no, it didn't make me feel vile and it didn't feel wrong that he was Thor's brother.

The vile part was I knew he was only doing these things to humiliate me, he would have already planned in his sick and twisted mind how to discard me later. Whether dead or alive, Loki didn't really care for me. I knew if I gave in and gave myself what I wanted - him - then he would win.

If I didn't, if I kept my distance, surely he would get bored. But that burning desire I had to claim him for myself, as mine wouldn't just up and disappear. I had to distract myself.

I stepped to the side and turned my head from him, I expected laughter or irritation but he didn't allow me to turn from him and his hand gently cupped my chin as he spoke,

'Give in or give up.' He leant in closer and his lashes fluttered closed as mine did as his last words were uttered against my lips,

'You will not survive me, Eva.'

And then he was kissing me, softly, gently as his tongue coaxed my bottom lip. I let out a soft whimper at his touch, the fact that even as he was doing this to spite me, it made me melt.

Loki pulled back and wiped his own bottom lip with his thumb before saying nothing and leaving. I stood there with my heart in my mouth and everything felt a little slower, my breath and my movement and as I reached the stairs I realised I should probably give warning to the guards to remove Kit's body.

I should have been more bothered by the fact that there was a dead body in the Vault but really I was so high off of Loki's kiss that when I turned back to check that Kit really was dead and he hadn't gotten up blind and zombie-like to follow, I hardly noticed that the amulet in the centre of the room was floating and glowing.

I fled, making a mental note to tell the guards not to touch that too should it kill someone else or enact another end of the world.

Chapter Text

Despite the size of the palace, I could not avoid Loki. Or rather, I believed he wanted his presence to be made clear. He wasn't going anywhere, I supposed he truly meant what he had said in the Vault, I would give in or give up. He would no doubt enjoy watching me seeth in anger and desire for him.

It was late afternoon the following day and as I sat on a balcony overlooking the ocean and drinking coffee - trying to figure out what to do with my time - Loki appeared and stood leaning against the balcony just to my left.

I glanced at him, still dressed casually in all black and with his sleeves half-pushed up his forearms. I didn't look at his face as I knew I would be met with a mischievous grin.

I didn't even ask him what he wanted and cradled my mug of coffee in my hands and continued to look out at the calm blue of the ocean. Though my mind began to wander, at what he might want or what he might say, I didn't dare move though because I didn't want his eyes on me. Having him in my presence was oddly exhilarating because I had no idea what his next move would be - though I knew whatever it would be would rattle me.

He must have met his match with me, my silence could have been endless because after what felt close to half-an-hour, Loki spoke, quietly I could hardly hear his words with his back still turned to me,

'He will be gone a while.'

Loki was talking of Thor and god knows what adventure he went on which was deemed so important.

I brought my knees to my chest and rearranged my long dress around my legs,

'So I'm in charge of an entire kingdom then, nice of daddy to let me know.' I tried to emphasise my anger through my words but they came out soft.

Loki looked over his shoulder at me and his brow furrowed,

'Actually, Thor put me in charge.'

'What?' I blanched.

Loki turned to me fully and crossed his arms over his chest,

'Once you left, Thor told me he wishes for me to be regent while he is absent. It is only right considering my experience and -'

'No.' I cut him off.

'What do you mean no?' he asked. 'These are my people.'

I shook my head and straightened, 'I don't care about the people. I'm talking about me. You're not in charge of me.'

'Well, technically speaking I am.' A small smile played on his lips and my heart thundered in my chest.

'I'm going to strongly advise that we think carefully about what is happening here, Loki.' I lifted my chin a little to prove my seriousness.

'And what is happening?' He asked with a cock of his head and I tried hard to hide the upturn of my lips. Was he flirting or teasing? Was he wanting me to say that I was attracted to him, that I wanted him?

'Something wrong.' though it was a lie the moment it left my lips, 'What would Thor think should his brother fuck his daughter?'

Then Loki's face hardened and he stepped toward me with an outstretched finger,

'You'd better be careful with the words you spew from that mouth of yours.'

'Or maybe I'm just trying to survive you.' I mocked his words from the previous day and shoved aside his accusatory finger as I stood, 'Whatever this attraction I have for you, it is cruel. But if I'm going to live a few thousand years, I'm going to make it very clear that it needs to stop.'

There was a slight truth to my words. Maybe it was seeing a dead body or having small daydreams about the man from the pier but regardless, Loki was right, I would not survive him. He had spent millennia taunting, calculating, tormenting and playing with people. I was another pawn to him, I had to set boundaries. I also had to make it clear that Thor was important to both of us, neither of us wanted to disappoint him or suffer his resentment.

There was only the deep exhale of breath through Loki's nostrils as he looked down at me, I expected more biting words but he only allowed me to continue, I rattled off my own thoughts to him,

'You are alone without Thor and so am I. We need him, as some type of stability in our lives. I will not lose him like I did the rest of my family and you won't either. We can continue this stupid little game of ours until one of us hurts the other and hurts Thor too. I will not leave though, I will not bow down to the likes of you.'

'You truly have no idea what it is to be a god.' He spoke in a low tone, 'You will bore of your civility.'

'Maybe I'll live long enough to see you gain back a fucking soul.' I bit back.

'How easy is it for you to paint me as a villain?' He questioned.

'You think I think you're a villain?' I moved toward him and poked my finger into his chest. He swatted my hand away but I poked again with my words,

'You are a victim of everything that has ever happened to you and yet you are so empty. How can you have lived for so long and be so fucking shallow?'

He blinked once and frowned, 'You are not capable of understanding me. It is your downfall, it is why it will be easy for me to drive you from this place.'

I rolled my eyes at his words knowing Thor wouldn't possibly choose me over Loki, would he?

Loki brushed past me without another word, I had wanted to follow him - desperate to have the last word but knowing that he probably wanted me to run after him.

I knew that putting distance between him would be much easier if I could just stay away from him. So I packed several things from my room and dragged them over to the lighthouse. Though there was only a small bathroom and no kitchen - I would have to make quick visits to the palace to eat and bathe properly.

But it was a retreat from Loki and his threats - empty or not. Until Thor got back, weeks or months from now. I would have to just wait and exist. At the least I had my books. And Kit.

My heart beat faster at the thought of the fisherman and my stomach dropped at the unexplained and almost forgotten death of the other Kit.

Loki had not mentioned it when he saw me and there were no whispers in the palace. My mind dredged up images of the eyeless Kit in the Vault and though I should have been demanding answers I knew I wouldn't get them. He was dead. Murdered.

By who? My mind tried to untangle all my questions but I failed and found myself walking the beach of New Asgard wondering if I was at risk, if the only item in the Vault was placed there or at risk of being stolen by Kit.

'Does this mean there's a free room at the palace?' A voice asked from behind me.

I looked up from the sand as Kit walked beside me. I was caught a little off guard when I realised he was talking to me and stopped walking.

He looked different. He was attractive before on the pier, in that not-trying kind of way some men have. But as he smiled at me I felt myself stalling for words.

He was dressed in a denim shirt which only made his eyes burn bright blue. His skin was flawless but tanned from the sun and the corners of his eyes crinkled lightly when he smiled.

'Uhh what?' I asked confused.

He raised one brow and gestured over his shoulder to the lighthouse,

'I'm not going to lie, I've been keeping my eye out, hoping to catch you. I saw you dragging a few bags into the lighthouse. Moving in?'

'Temporarily.' I told him and I could feel myself at a loss for words at how handsome he was and I should have been thinking instead about how nice he was or how a man with the same name as him was murdered but the wind picked up and I caught his fresh scent.

'Are you going somewhere?' I asked him.

He looked down at his jeans and boots and nodded,

'I was.' He didn't elaborate and I pushed for more from him.

'By yourself?'

He chuckled, 'No. I had a date but she cancelled.'

'Why?' I asked too quickly and crossed my arms over my chest as I felt my cheeks warm.

Kit only shrugged and copied my stance, 'She thinks we may be incompatible because I'm not a cat person.'

I laughed, 'That makes two of us.'

'I'm still very confused why people have to have preferences over animals.'

'You're Asgardian. I don't blame you.' I shrugged.

'Oh no, I'm human.' Kit said with a frown.

I thought back to our conversation on the pier,
'You told me you were Asgardian?'

'No. I'm human. I meant Asgardian as I'm from New Asgard. Not originally but since the-' he didn't finish his sentence and instead snapped his fingers.

'Sorry for any confusion. Though this little town before it was New Asgard was where my father grew up as a boy, when he passed I moved back here.'

'I'm sorry to hear that.' I said and don't say anything else, too caught up in that dark silence that came with acknowledging death.

Kit shrugged, 'It was pre-blip, I had enough time with him. I'm kind of grateful he wasn't here for everything that happened, it probably would have killed him. I was lucky, I didn't really lose anyone important from the Blip.'

I stared at him as his words took root and I felt my stomach roil, it wasn't meant to be insensitive but his words were painful. How lucky he was to have gotten a proper goodbye, he could grieve normally, he could live his life without all of the possibilities of what could have been.

Kit paled and reached his hand out to touch my arm but I escaped his touch as I walked back down the beach toward the lighthouse. Kit followed, a soft curse uttered under his breath.

'Eva, I didn't realise.' he hurried to keep up with my pace and I stopped.

'I can't escape it you know. It's infuriating that people could get their lives back. I'm continuously changing myself and I can't fucking keep up. I was human Eva and then orphan Eva and then daughter-of-Thor Eva and now, now I'm some fucked up in-between woman. Like, what am I meant to be? What the hell does this universe want from me?' I searched Kit's face only to be met with a deep frown, his eyes averted.

Shit. Now things were worse. Kit said nothing and I let out a deep sigh. His eyes finally met mine before he spoke,

'Nothing I say to you will make you any better, I can't even really relate to you. But is any of it worth it, would your family want to see you this upset?'

'What?'

'Think about it Eva,' Kit continued, his tone soft, 'They're never coming back, they would want to see you do well, I'm sure. Do not live your life in the shadow of your grief, you deserve to be happy.'

'You don't know me.' I grated, feeling tears well in my eyes.

Kit shrugged, 'Of course not. And I also shouldn't be spewing life advice to you. I know enough about pain to know that nothing will remain of you should you let it consume you.'

My mind went straight to Loki, his anger and viciousness and hurt. He was consumed by his pain, millennia of it had turned him into a shell of a man. I didn't want that for myself, so incapable of love - the right kind. Kit was right but I also hated standing in front of this stranger and being told what to do, for him seeing what my life would look like after meeting me twice.

'I don't know how to make it stop hurting.' I said and felt my tears run down my face, I swiped my hand over my cheeks and Kit offered me a tight smile,

'You don't. You just get on with it, it's terrifying but a little exciting.'

'Ok.' I said because I didn't know what else to say. Kit began to laugh, a deep and soft rumbling sound which had me smiling,

'The second time I'm in the presence of Her Highness and I'm making her cry.'

I felt a little lighter having him see me be vulnerable and having him let me be, no judgement. It was refreshing as being with Loki was dizzying and wrong I had to remind myself.

'You can make it up to me?'

Kit smiled and it was dazzling, his teeth were white and straight, his eyes crinkled at the edges and he leaned into me a little, his voice a whisper.

'Are you asking me on a date, Princess?'

'It's Eva,' I corrected him, 'And maybe, I'll have to see how else you can embarrass me.'

Kit nodded and just stared at me, I felt my cheeks flush red and shifted on the sand.

'It's a date.' he offered his hand and I took it, his grip firm and warm and only making me think of how large his hands were.

Chapter Text

I awoke that night to two hands grasping my throat. My initial reaction was that it was a terrible dream as I had so often become accustomed to nightmares of death and loneliness and more often than not falling and reaching for someone.

I jerked upright and the grip tightened around my throat. Though there were no curtains in the lighthouse bedroom, the dark of night outside still shadowed the person before me. I tried to scream but it came out as a strangled sound and I was pushed deeper into my pillow. My stomach lurched and I could hardly swallow down the bile rising in my constricted throat.

My legs flailed and I swatted at the person before me, the man with all his strength but I only his muscle. I could not breathe and felt myself being dragged into unconsciousness. I was going to die.

The sky fluttered in an array of white and then burning orange light. Was I dead or was it morning? Was this a dream?

The hands around my throat loosened as the man before me groaned and fell atop of me. I screamed but it came out as nothing. My throat felt raw and already bruised as I scrambled up on my bed, arms and legs kicking at the man to get off of me, my chest heavy. I had to run.

The man landed on the floor unconscious or dead. I didn't stop to look as another figure came toward me and this time when I did scream it was piercing. Hands grabbed me and I could not decipher the deep and calming voice. There was more than one person wanting to hurt me.

I continued to scream until I heard my name, uttered multiple times in the dark room. But my mind ran wild with twisted thoughts that whoever that person was, they would kill me.

I fled out of the room and down the stairs, almost close to breaking a few bones on the way down. I flung the door of the lighthouse open and was relieved to find no one awaiting me on the other side. My name was called from behind me but as I turned it was the sight on the beach which had me freezing.

At first it looked to be a large bonfire upon the sand, but it stretched almost the length of the beach from where I was at the lighthouse all the way to the pier and beyond where a larger fire curled up against the base of the palace.

'No.' I breathed and ran toward the beach. Though though the flames burned bright and hot, they were well enough scattered upon the sand in smaller fires that I could wander through.

I should have felt relieved in my short nightgown and bare feet but instead I felt exposed and an idiot for not having gone through the town but even upon the edge of the beach several groups of townsfolk in their own nightclothes looked at the scene.

As I kept my mouth covered with my hand, eyes peering into the curls of smoke in the sky. What burned was pieces of metal amongst other things. It was a wreck. A shipwreck.

'Thor?!' I screamed and began to scout the beach but there was only pieces of a ship. Things I had no idea of. It was all so broken up and scattered that I had no idea what I was looking for, what was the front or back or wings or engines.

The fire began to die and other people began to venture out to discover what or who remained. I had only thoughts of Thor as I called his name and I was desperate to believe that this was not his ship. A crash wouldn't kill him. He was a god.

Tendrils of dark and horrid thoughts weaved through my mind and began to paralyse me until all I could do was glance around me and then my eyes settled properly upon the palace.

It still burned. I was closer to the palace and the fire looked worse up close. Was it more than a shipwreck, was this an attack on New Asgard, on earth?

I hadn't realised I had sunken to my knees until I felt someone's arms around me. I flinched and pushed away and it was Kit who looked down upon me. His face was pulled into a deep frown and his hair was mussed.

'Eva, are you all right?' He asked and I had nothing to say as my palace burned and the world around me began to break once again.

What was happening? Why was this happening again?

'Eva, I need you to tell me if you are hurt. I need you to tell me if you can stand.'

I swallowed and my hand went to my throat. My eyes moving behind Kit to the lighthouse. Was that man still there?

'I can stand.' I croaked and Kit helped me to my feet but did not let me go.

'Thor,' I said unable to form a sentence.

'I saw two ships crash. I wasn't sure where they came from.' Kit tried to explain, his voice was levelled and I realised it was him in the lighthouse I instinctively pulled away.

'You were at the lighthouse.'

'After I saw the crash I headed straight there, I thought you might have been hurt.'

'That man was trying to kill me.' My hands snaked around my own throat.

'This feels like an attack.' Kit breathed and shook his head, 'I'm not sure what to do, we should head to the palace then we can-' he trailed off and his gaze swept across the beach to the crowds and curious I tried to glance at what he was looking at.

Off further in the distance, away from the crowds and the worst of the dying fires, a figure moved in the shadows of the night towards the cliffs and end of the beach.

I couldn't see clear enough to distinguish anything but that the figure was large and muscular and walked with a limp. Like they were injured.

'Is that,' Kit began.

'Thor!' I exclaimed and shoved past him, trying to gain traction and speed on the softer sand which was not crowded with debris.

'Eva, wait!' Kit called after me and his stride was matched to mine due to his height. He did nothing to stop me knowing possibly that after my near-death experience that I was not in the right mindset. I felt safe enough knowing Kit was with me and that there were enough people around that if something happened they could help.

But this was New Asgard, its people were good-natured and protected. Somewhat.

The cliffs were farther than I imagined and though I called after Thor as did Kit by my side, he didn't stop but kept his pace and something felt off. I couldn't put it down to Thor simply not stopping for us, not if he had been in a crash and badly hurt.

The dark began to withdraw as it gave way to dawn and before Kit and I lie a small cave. I glanced enough of the man before us to see a shock of long blonde hair and red cape. It was Thor, his face turned to us but his eyes did not meet mine as he gestured me to follow him into the cave.

Why was he hiding, what danger was he threatened by? I tried to recall how he acted before he left, his dismissal of me and then private chat to Loki. Talk of trying to marry me off. Was Thor scared Loki would act out in jealousy and hurt me? How convenient this attack coincided we me leaving the palace and Loki taking up residence as the regent. He was in his element. Only Thor coming back could disrupt his power trip.

I glanced at Kit who bit his bottom lip nervously, his hand reaching to run through his messy hair. As the sky lightened I could see now that he still wore the same clothes as the previous day. He hadn't slept, I was grateful. He saved my fucking life.

'This feels like a trap.' he said.

'It feels more like my father has something urgent to tell me.' I breathed and continued forward.

'And if he doesn't, if it isn't him. Doesn't Loki have some type of glamour?'

I turned to face Kit, frowning, 'Are you coming or not?'

'Sure.' but he made no effort to move. 'Or we could just head back to the palace. Wait him out. Maybe avoid being killed.' though he had obviously meant to be humorous, his joke fell flat neither of us laughed.

'If I die, I die.' I gave him a tight smile and was met with Kit's raised eyebrows. He walked side by side with me and halted me several moments later.

'You're not kidding. You aren't scared.'

'Jesus Christ, Kit. Of course, I am. But I would rather face what's in that cave, Thor or not and figure out what is happening and who tried to kill me and why because I have no powers and besides me being heir to a throne I don't have a whole interest in - I am pretty much human.'

Kit's eyes narrowed, 'You don't have abilities, but your father is Thor Odinson? You are the granddaughter of Odin the Allfather.'

'Why do you care so much?' I saw a curiosity play in his ocean blue eyes at my words, and maybe it was because I was half-delirious with the events which had unfolded in the past hour but his entire demeanour changed. His shoulders dropped a little, his eyes skirted up and down my body and there was an openness about his face, a softening of his features. If I had thought him handsome before, now he was beautiful. His eyes turned up with his mouth.

'Gods, Eva. This whole time I thought-'

'What?' I jumped to the defence, was he expecting something different? A powerful goddess he could pray to, who would grant wishes and slay armies. Absolutely not.

Kit shook his head but said nothing. I didn't want to wait for more disappointing words or to be embarrassed by this man for a third time so I continued on to the cave.

He still followed and as I reached the mouth of the cave I caught a glimpse of him at my side.

'Come on,' he said with an offered palm. I placed my hand in his and lead the way on shaking legs. I cursed myself for not asking him to take his shirt off for my warmth and for other reasons. Maybe if this was a trap I would have liked my last sight to have been something appeasing.

Wind whistled through the cave and otherwise it was silent and dark and some place deeper inside I could hear the continuous drip-drip-drip of water.

'He couldn't have just waited for us outside?' I snarkily said to myself under my breath.

'Too easy.' Kit dropped my hand and when I turned to glance at him over my shoulder and make a face at his poor humour he offered me a smirk.

'Maybe we should go?' He suggested.

'Yeah, probably.' I agreed but scoped the expanse of the dark cave only to see smooth rock and bulking shapes farther back.

Kit had gestured for me to lead the way until I heard a grunt and my name being called from Thor.

'He's hurt.' I uttered and called out to my father.

'Thor, where the hell are you?' I tried to keep my tone hushed but it only echoed off the cave walls and had me disoriented the deeper I went. Luckily the ceiling above sometimes opened up to show glimpses of the morning sky and offered enough light for me to carve out a shaky path. I let out a few colourful curses I knew Thor would enjoy as I felt my feet being torn up by rocks and shells and god knew what else.

I wasn't even sure if Kit was following and soon I saw Thor slumped over against the cave wall, most of his body resting against a small boulder.

'Thor!' But even at my loud voice he did not move and I glanced his hand pressed weakly against his bleeding stomach.

The path to get through to him was narrow and rocks crammed against me and the wall, my nightgown catching on several rocks. As I tried to squeeze myself into the smaller spaces - agonisingly squishing my breasts and thighs as I tried to manoeuvre sideways.

How did Thor manage to get through with his bulking form?

I stopped on my path to him. My stomach sank at the loud thought flashing in my mind. I could taste the words. It was a trap.

I scrambled backward cautiously.
'I'm getting help!' I lied and thankfully my voice portrayed anxiety. My stomach threatened to be let loose but I swallowed down the bile as my hands shook and I lost my footing, stumbling a little but righting myself quickly.

Though my arm twisted and the inside flesh caught between two rocks. I freaked and tore my arm away only to let out a sharp hiss at the pain as blood fled down my arm and across my dress as I cut myself.

The blood flowed heavily and as I continued to scramble to escape it was a pulsing sound which echoed around the cave. Before me floated the jewelled object that Loki and I had touched in the vault before it disappeared.

It blocked my way and as I tried to skirt past it, it moved to block me once again.

A nervous laugh escaped my mouth as I tried again to dodge it and behind me I heard rocks shifting, a deep grunt and a sword being unsheathed.

'Fuck!' I screamed as I touched the ruby jewel and felt the word grow cold around me.

Chapter Text

The world was warm and calm, birds chirped around me and I nestled down back to sleep only to wake abruptly with a pounding head and throbbing arm.

I sat up slowly with a hiss and looked at my arm which was crusted with dried blood but no cut remained.
My mind slowly caught up with me enough for me to realise I was not in that horrifying cave with not-Thor.

Sparse trees surrounded me, a lake several feet away with sweeping fields and farther away snow-capped mountains. I stood and stretched and made my way to the water, kneeling down to wash away my blood only for a soft voice to stop me.

'You will be stuck here if you wash it away.'

I turned and had to shield my eyes from the bright sun to see the outline of a tall woman dressed in white. I could not place her face due to the brightness off the sun.

'What's happening?' I asked.

She answered like she had been awaiting me, 'You have been brought here. By some greater force.'

I tried to hide my frustration with a straight face at her riddle of an answer. I must have failed as she let out a harmonious laugh.

'Evangeline dear, I don't mean to confuse you. Rather I can only give you small pieces of information which will guide you in becoming who you are meant to be.'

I shifted on my feet and took a cautionary step toward her, she did not move away from me but simply folded her hands before her. The light shifted and I glimpsed her face.

Her slim figure was dressed in a simple white gown, over one shoulder fell a gold embroidered cape. She was regal and poised, her lips upturned into a closed smile which reached her blue eyes. Her dark blonde hair weaved intricately on top of her head.

'Hello, Frigga.' I breathed. My eyes meandering over the landscape around me. There were no threats. This was no illusion.

'Is this-' I began, panic rising in my chest.

'Valhalla. Yes.' Though her words should have had me screaming in fear that I was dead - that I was in the place Asgardian's went to rest - it was her levelled tone which only had me nodding in acceptance.

'You're not dead.' She continued and swept her arms around her to venture to the scenic mountains in the distance, the lake and expanse of field.

'You were brought here because I am to tell you your fate.'

'Isn't everyone's future meant to a secret?' I could only take in the woman before me, the golden glow surrounding her, how warm she was, how the sound of her voice calmed me. Frigga was my grandmother. Thor and Loki's mother. And I was the one who could visit her in Valhalla? It made no sense, what was so great about my future that was deemed important for me to have travelled into another dimension?

'Come,' Frigga offered her hand, palm up and I had no choice but to take it and even flinched at the weight of her hand on mine and her soft and cool skin.

As sensing my unease, Frigga reached out to smooth back a stray hair of mine,
'You are safe here. I have so much I wish to share with you. You are a great blessing for this family my dear, I'm sorry I can not show you more than I am able.'

I frowned and Frigga softly ran her knuckles down my jawline,
'Eva, how much you do look like my dear Thor.' Her head cocked to the side and her eyes welled with unshed tears as my own began to form.

'I know it has not been an easy life for you my granddaughter.' She nodded as I did, my words choked in my throat.

'There will be love. You are worthy of the healing it will bring, I promise.'

My tears fell freely and she swiped at them with a sad smile,

'I'm so lost. I don't know what to do anymore. How to live, who to be.' My voice cracked on the last words. I was ashamed of so many things. Of losing my family, the false hope, not being the daughter Thor wanted, betraying him with my lust for Loki, even my nasty words to the man who was meant to be my family too.

Frigga smoothed down my hair and I felt like a child again in the safe and warm embrace of a mother.
'You are a goddess my dear, you do not become one, you are born one.'

I let out a confused laugh which made my tears fall faster.
'I'm not doing a very good job.'

'Walk with me,' Frigga offered her arm and I took it as she led us through a field of wildflowers.

'It is in your blood, greatness.'

'From Thor?' I asked taking in the endless sea of colour before us.

'Thor was always to be king, Odin - your grandfather - knew that Thor had the potential to be a great god but not a great king if he didn't earn the right. He had his own trials, some forced upon him by his father and I, some of his own doing.'

'So to become great, I have to be challenged?'

'Not quite. What lies dormant in your blood, the strength you possess have always been yours. You do not need to earn them, you need only awaken them.' Frigga answered.

Exasperated I was silent as we walked in the quiet, the wind a soft breeze on my face. My mind went to Loki however and how his own full abilities were awakened by the Casket of Ancient Winters. It was for him an awakening to his true self. Was I meant to face some new shocking truth about myself?

I already knew the father who raised me was not mine biologically when Thor showed up. My mother had bumped into Thor in the nineties on a skiing trip he just happened to be on earth as a dare from one of his friends.

They spent one night together. My mother never told my father as they were weeks away from being married.

There were no great truths awaiting me to uncover.

'So what is it then you wish to tell me?' I stopped walking and Frigga removed her arm linked in mine as I faced her.

'Are there prophecies of me slaying great monsters or marrying beautiful princes?' I tried to laugh but it came out strangled as I thought of Kit. And then of Loki, somehow my mind had kept wondering to thoughts of him. I frowned.

'You will love him. Even if it pains you.'

I blinked and feigned confusion but Frigga's face remained open and smiling. Though my mind wished to go to Kit and his handsome face, all my thoughts went straight to Loki and his deep blue eyes, his hidden smile and golden laugh.

'I don't love anyone.' I said.

This time it was Frigga's turn to frown, 'I know who it is your mind went to, it is okay to love him. Not many do or know how to.'

'He is my uncle.' I laughed nervously.

'And my son.' Frigga answered, 'Love is not bound by our own designations. Not true love anyway.'

'So what, that is why I was dragged to another dimension for, so you could tell me you give me your permission for me to love your son? Am I meant to accept him as he is because he is family?'

Frigga stared at me, her breathing levelled whereas mine raced. Was this a joke, an illusion of some kind?

'That was only me as Loki's mother asking you, my dear, to never give up on him. Despite all his flaws, Loki is kind but a little broken by all those who have abandoned him.'

I blinked at her but said nothing as I felt my cheeks grow hot from her arched brow.

'Fine.' I nodded, not saying much more without anger slipping into my tone, 'I will learn to love my uncle.'

Frigga frowned this time and tutted, grasping my elbow and giving me a soft push to begin us walking again. I hadn't noticed but our surroundings changed no longer endless fields and blue sky but an empty cliff top and rolling grey ocean beyond. The sky was a muted orange in its sunset.

'What are you doing?' I asked the woman as she seated me upon a rock and paced before me, hands clasped together. Her energy felt nervous and a little jilted.

'Dear Evangeline, we have spent too much time already I fear of speaking nonsense. My soft guidance doesn't seem to be enough for you I'm afraid.'

'Frigga,' I began and shifted on the rock anxiously, 'I'm here, in Valhalla, with you - my deceased grandmother who was also once a goddess and Queen of Asgard. You can punch me straight in the throat with your words and I'm sure they won't affect me much.'

Frigga smiled tightly at my humour and knelt before me, grasping my own hands in her soft, cool ones.

'When I ask you to love Loki, I am not asking you to love him as an uncle. I am asking you to love him as one does a husband.'

I felt my face burn with heat and had to swallow down my words, only a breeze brushed between us and caressed our hair. Frigga squeezed my hands.

'Evangeline, I need you to take Loki as a lover.'

I should have told her that he was my uncle, that was incest without the blood relation, even stranger so was Frigga telling me that I needed to have him as my lover.

'Why?' I breathed and stared straight into her blue eyes. They narrowed at me in seriousness.

'In doing so will help you gain control of your abilities. I know that it's aberrant but Loki is your future.'

'Why?' I asked again.

'It is difficult to say so little and so much. I'm not forbidden to say but I fear it will bring the wrong fate upon you.'

'I have multiple fates?' Now I was just grasping Frigga's hands as I felt an invisible clock ticking away until she sent me away even more confused as to when I came here only minutes or was it hours ago?

'The two of you will return to one another through time, you will tire of running. It is best that I should tell you that this bond between the two of you is intentional.'

'Frigga.' I grasped her hands as she pulled away to stand.

'You have to leave now Eva.' Her smile was bittersweet and I stood silently anyway and nestled myself in her warm embrace. She kissed my hair I felt my chest ache with love, a need to closeness and to be comforted.

'There is a reason why Loki is still here after all his time spent in the grasp of death and war and loss, he is here because eventually your own darkness will destroy you and he is the only one who can help you combat it.'

'It isn't that bad Frigga.' I pleaded, 'Whatever grand plan you have set, cancel it, alter it. My sadness is not so great I will go about destroying the world! I do not need Loki's help. I don't need him as a lover.'

Frigga nodded like she understood and grasped my shoulders firmly,
'It is your anger which will destroy worlds, Evangeline. Even if it is all a lie, love him.'

And before I could speak, Frigga pushed me backward hard and I fell into darkness as she disappeared before me in a swirl of silver and gold and then nothing as my back struck something hard and knocked the air from my lungs.

Loki's name was the last thing on my lips before it all turned black.

Chapter Text

I groaned as my back involuntarily arched off of a hard, cool surface and moved my head to the side as my skull throbbed.

A steady pace rung in my ears and echoed around me. Everything was much too bright.

'What the fuck?' I groaned and sat up, pulling myself onto all fours where I was met with the sight of leather boots. I looked up and sank back down on my heels.

'You're meant to be dead.' The rasp of Loki's voice had me waking from my supposed concussion as I gazed up at his full height as he peered down at me on the floor. I still couldn't work out where we were.

Outside with the warm breeze against my face, surely the palace gardens of New Asgard with the stretch of manicured gardens. It just felt odd, especially Loki in his Asgardian leathers. Where exactly had Frigga thrown me?

I grunted at him as my head pounded and stuck my hand forward so he could help me up. He did gracefully but I only swayed on my feet as I grabbed my throbbing skull and his hands held me tightly by the hips.

'Thor!' Loki turned me and wrapped my arm around his neck as he held me up against him and I had to close my eyes at the glare of the sunlight.

After a moment I opened my eyes to the sound of pounding footsteps on metal and the roar of laughter. A thick figure emerged from a ramp from the small spaceship or what I assumed to be some type of aircraft carrier mere metres before me.

'Eva!' It was Thor who appeared before me and embraced me in a rough hug which had me wincing in pain.

I swatted at him as he let me go and patted the top of my head gently. I swore I saw a shared look between Loki who still held me up and my father who swept his gaze over our surroundings.

'I thought you were dead.' Thor shook his head in disbelief, 'I returned home to find you gone and when that man told us of your disappearance I thought for sure-'

'I was taken.' I cut Thor off and dropped my arm from around Loki, though he still kept me upright, his arm around my waist. I tried to keep my face from burning up with the feel of his palm flat against my hip but remained focus on what I had to tell Thor and Loki. What I had seen, where I had been and what I had been told.

'We were told the same by that man, that someone had taken you, though he had no grounds to stand on. People saw him disappear with you into the caves on the shore of New Asgard and never come out.' Thor's voice was filled with what sounded to be guilt.

I shook my head and tried to shift forward to touch Thor, reassure him that I was tricked. I thought I saw him going into that cave, that Kit had nothing to do with it but Loki kept me firmly by his side and I realised why - Loki hadn't told Thor about the Vault or what we had found there, the body and the mysterious artefact.

As if sensing my tension, Loki spoke next, 'Evangeline should first get some rest. I'm sure after all of these weeks she is a little confused, given the circumstances it's best if we get her inside and comfortable before she tells us of her escape. You remember how frightening your first kidnapping was. '

'Escape?' I questioned but Loki's fingertips pressed into my hip as a warning and I nodded and offered Thor a wavering look, feigning confusion and exhaustion. Though I didn't have to try too hard before he nodded quickly and offered me a tight smile.

'You're safe now.' Thor offered and placed a warm hand on my shoulder. He looked as if he wished to say more but stalked away. I tried to glance over my shoulder at where Thor was headed knowing that we were far from the palace - but Loki was grabbing my face and forcing me to look at him.

'Where did he take you?' His voice held a small hint of anger but his eyes betrayed him and how deep his curiosity was, 'What did he ask of you?'

I swatted Loki's hand away and breathed in deep before telling him some of the truth. How I had awoken to someone trying to kill me, how I had stumbled outside to see the crash and Kit had saved me. We had both seen who we had assumed to be Thor until I assumed it was a trap. And then I told him about Valhalla and Frigga.

Before I could tell Loki what she had said he was knocking past me with such a brisk pace I had to run after him.

'Loki!' I called but stopped abruptly at the sight before me of the immaculate expanse of grass and gleaming white building which towered above me.

It was the Avengers compound. What reason did Frigga have for returning me here, though I suspected most of the reason was because Loki was here.

I continued after him until he spun on his heel, an accusatory finger pointed my way and I flinched as he stopped just before me. I looked up at his face with widened eyes at his dark tone,

'I do my best to protect my people and my kingdom and my brother,' he sucked in a deep breath through his nose before prodding his finger into my shoulder, 'But I will not protect you. Thor will know of the boy in the Vault and you wishing to rid New Asgard of me. He will hear of your lies of visiting Valhalla and speaking to our mother and you had best wish you never spewed such filth, for if I was king I would have your tongue for such vile lies.'

When he finished, his breath was ragged and his eyes were darkened with fury, his forehead lined in a deep frown.

'So, look into my mind then.' I told him grabbing his wrist and he tore it away but I grabbed it again and he allowed me to press his palm against my temple.

'What use do I have lying to you, God of Mischief?' My words were barely audible against the racing of my heart and fear bubbling in my gut. It was not that I had anything to hide from him, it was what his reaction would be hearing Frigga's words about him and that in some fucked up way he was to be my saviour.

But Loki only looked at me, for the longest while. I reached to remove his hand but his other shot upward and pressed against my skull and I felt a whisper of something against my mind. Like a zap of electricity, though it felt like emerald tendrils curling against my memories in my mind.

And just as quickly Loki was dropping his hands from me like I had burnt him and his eyes welled with unshed tears.

'What-' he began shaking his head, his own hands running through his hair in disbelief. My mouth was dry and I had no words, more ashamed than anything.

It was a rejection. I could feel how sick he felt, how his disbelief at Frigga's words of what we should be were turning into disgust.

'You were never there.' Loki mumbled and was still shaking his head in shock and I could do nothing but stand before him wishing Frigga was wrong, along with her prophecy.

'In all of the...' he trailed off again and I understood he was trying to make sense of it all, 'They never mentioned you. You weren't at the end. You weren't in any of it.'

I swallowed and pleaded with my body to move so I wouldn't have to endure any more of Loki's ramblings and instead could make more sense of everything else which had happened before meeting Frigga.

'Where is Kit?' I asked instead and hoped that he was alive and well in New Asgard. Mostly because that was a future I was willing to move towards, he was someone I could lose myself in temporarily to forget it all.

'Who?' Loki asked and the question caught him off guard though I sensed he enjoyed the distraction.

'The man. Not the one in the Vault. The other one, the one who I went into the cave with.'

'He's in New Asgard. In the dungeon.' Loki shrugged me off and sighed, avoiding my gaze.

'Why?' I asked, 'Is he alive? He saved my life he shouldn't be in the dungeons!'

Loki cast me an annoyed glance and it turned into a scolding look, 'He was last seen with the Princess of New Asgard. He was incoherent and mumbling nonsense about Thor leading his daughter into a trap to kill her.'

I breathed a sigh of relief knowing Kit was alive, though probably not doing well or looking forward to seeing me again for where he had ended up. 'Without a trial or any evidence? That isn't very fair of the Asgardian King.'

'Thor did as any father would do and locked him up. He had to blame someone for his daughter going missing as long as you did.'

'I was gone a few hours.' Though as soon as I said it I knew it was a lie. Time was obviously different in Valhalla. I looked to Loki for correction.

'You were gone for three weeks.' He said, eyes widening as he looked me up and down and finally stalked off toward the compound. I followed closely behind him.

'That doesn't explain why you're at the Avengers Compound.' I said to myself but Loki cast me a backward glance and I caught the smirk on his lips.

'Thor assembled them to find you, dear Evangeline.'

'Oh,' was all I could say as several figures emerged from a set of glass doors at the compound entrance.

'Fuck.' I whispered and Loki chuckled at me.

Chapter Text

Captain America, the Winter Soldier, Spiderman, Hawkeye and Ant-Man stood assembled in a line blocking the doorway as they saw Loki and I approach. Thor stood before them, his back to us so I could not see what he was saying but when he glanced back toward us his face was set in a grimace.

His effort to find me was thoughtful but from the looks on some of the Avenger's faces, they were less than pleased to have found Thor's daughter with him. More so confused to see Loki stop in front of them with a smug grin on his face, he folded his hands over his chest.

'What, not one of you missed me?' he asked.

There was a deep grumbling from the assembly of men, Hawkeye and Bucky turned to walk back into the compound the latter hesitating to lean toward Sam to utter something in his ear. Sam's response was a sharp nod and a broad stance, his muscled arms crossing tightly across his chest.

'Hi, I'm Peter.' Spiderman - Peter - offered his hand toward Loki who only blinked at the teenager's hand cast out toward him, Peter didn't drop his hand but instead offered it to me, 'Hi.'

'Hi,' I said and shook his hand and was met with a broad, youthful grin, 'Eva.'

'Hi, I'm Peter.' he repeated, his cheeks flushed red at his double introduction and I looked at his hand grasping onto mine still, he noticed and dropped it, that same hand reaching back to scratch the back of his neck.

'You need to bow.' Loki's voice was low and Peter's gaze widened as he looked at Loki looking down at him. Loki cocked his chin toward me and a glance at Thor told me he wasn't obliging to Loki's request.

'No, you don't need to.' I told Peter whose dark eyes widened as they moved between the three of us Asgardians, sizing us up, probably wondering what would happen if he didn't bow. Whose wrath would be worse, my fathers - Thor, God of Thunder - or my uncles - Loki, God of Mischief and former enemy to the Avengers.

'She's a Princess.' Loki added, helping Peter in his decision though from his sharp tone it was clear Loki wasn't giving him a decision. He wanted the kid to bow to me. Why hadn't he asked the same for himself?

'It is customary when you first greet royalty to bow.' Thor offered with a flick of his hand, 'And gods.' His shoulders widened at the statement.

Loki stepped forward to Peter, Sam and Ant-Man - whose name I couldn't recall stood to attention as Loki moved toward the kid.

'If you're to prove yourself a gentleman to my Princess, then bow.' The rasp of Loki's voice made my belly curl. It was dark and sinister and predatory and I half-believed his request had meaning. Like maybe he truly felt I should have been acknowledged and not left in the shadow of my father.

'Oh!' Peter near bent himself in half and I gasped, reaching out to stop him.

'You don't need to do that!' my voice came out in a rasp.

Loki turned to look at me, his anger now aimed toward me, like he had done me a favour I had rejected. His eyes darkened toward that insidious crimson shade, his chin lifted so I could glance the sharpness of his jaw. He said nothing though, a look was shared between himself and Thor beside me which only had Loki shrugging in reply.

'I'm so sorry, your Majesty.' Peter straightened and bowed again, there was a snicker of laughter from the men and it was Ant-Man who slapped a hand on Peter's back.

'Sorry about the kid, he's not used to being around royalty.' Ant-Man said, offering his own bow which seemed more of a curtsey. Sam cleared his throat and Peter cast me a short friendly wave and Ant-Man's widened gaze meant he more than likely would be asking questions later.

'Looks like you don't need our help after all?' Sam asked Thor, 'Though I'm a little confused. I thought you were dead?' Sam pointed to Loki and looked him up and down condescendingly. That didn't go well for Loki as he stepped forward to match Sam's stare,

'You can't kill a god.' Loki said, his tone flat.

'You know, that's funny, the big purple guy with the testicle chin - the one who had killed you - said something along the same lines and Thor over here,' he knocked his chin out toward Thor, 'He was the one to cut his head clean off his neck.'

Loki retreated, I assumed he was millennia old enough to know when to pick his battles. Though I sensed he wouldn't forget this conversation with Sam anytime soon by the way in which he glowered at him and his entire presence turned the air to a brisk chill.

'Since you're here,' Sam's attention turned toward me, his gaze softened and face welcoming 'Would you like to have a look around?'

'Yes!' I didn't bother to hide my excitement, Sam gestured for us to follow inside and I audibly gasped as I walked inside. Access to the Avengers Compound was strictly forbidden for anyone except those who worked for S.H.I.E.L.D or who wielded super-strength or magical powers. It wasn't much besides a hive of people walking around and talking in hushed tones, with tablets in their hands or phones to their ears. Everything was white, the ceiling was glass and the entire foyer was filled with light. Regardless, I felt giddy just being there.

A figure moved toward us briskly, greying hair a mess and pushing up his glasses with his index finger.

'Bruce, my old friend!' Thor beamed and embraced the scientist but Loki shifted closer toward me, half-hidden behind me as Bruce and Thor stepped away from one another and Bruce's eyes skirted over Loki one brow raised at him, Loki only offered a sharp nod in greeting. I knew Loki would not actively engage in any conversation with Bruce in fear of greeting the Hulk.

Bruce offered his hand toward me, 'Evangeline, it's nice to see you.'

I shook his hand, grateful for a human greeting, 'You too. Thanks for having us, Bruce.'

He smiled at me and the way in which his dark eyes fell upon me made me relax a little, I still found it difficult to fit the image of this kind man with the monster he could transform into. I knew though whatever shade he was, he was kind-hearted and generous. His close friendship with my father spoke of that.

'I'm glad you're safe, I'm sorry about the crowd but we tend to take things a little seriously when we're uhh, assembled.'

I could only nod at this. I could understand the dread each and every Avenger and worker within the Compound would have had when Thor called them in. Even mention of the Blip, post or pre, made my gut wrench and palms sweat. It dredged up an array of tumultuous emotions I had buried and wouldn't allow myself to feel. Thoughts that would only drag me into the depths of something which I could only describe as living purgatory.

Bruce spoke in hushed tones to Thor who led him away, Thor could only throw me a sympathetic look over his shoulder,

'Stay with her.' he told Loki. Though the way in which the air crackled and his voice boomed across the space made it clear it was a command as my father - as King of New Asgard protecting his heir.

Loki's hand pressed against my waist and the warmth pressing into me made me shift forward to escape it, but his touch followed. I swallowed and hoped that Sam would not see my blush or hear my racing pulse. Loki's finger splayed out and shifted toward my hip. I swallowed again and felt his eyes upon me. Even now, in front of all these people, he was playing at something. What did he feel I owed him?

What must we have looked like? Loki's hand on my hip with me pressed closely into his side. Was it an innocent picture of an uncle doing his duty to protect his niece, a man honouring his king's wish, a prince being chivalrous? Or was it something else, did anyone who pass us assume we were lovers, Loki holding me close to him, protective, possessive, guarding what was his - taunting any man to look my way so that he could kill them where they stood for even attempting to think they had the honour of looking at me.

I began to paint a picture in my mind of what he was doing. It felt like some type of claim, but that was stupid. Loki was acting, manipulating, planning. I was just a pawn to him.

My mind spiralled and Frigga's words were at the forefront of my mind. I knew what I had offered Loki hadn't included her words. Not all of them, I kept them guarded. Not wanting them to be true, wanting to choose my own future. One which was full of love and happiness and not desperation and ruin. Not taking my uncle as a lover. Blood relation excluded.

I attempted again to shift away from Loki again but his touch was like steel, though he must have sensed my discomfort and shifted his hand to rest on my lower back. Though any direction he would have moved his hand would have had me burning.

I had to shift my attention away, I was losing it silently and I was afraid Loki would somehow creep into my mind. Did he need physical touch to read my thoughts, could he grasp images or words even this close?

My gaze roved over the Compound and I could no longer see Thor or Bruce, I hoped at least not to be left alone with Loki. I would have rathered a tour of the grounds and Compound, to see where the Avengers worked, where Thor had been with the world's heroes, here and past when they figure out how to save us all. Sam must have read my thoughts from my expression because he gestured at a staircase to his right,

'Our quarters are on the third, fourth and fifth floors. Common rooms, bedrooms, gym, kitchen - you name it they have it. Labs are located in the lower levels, for those of us who are better with numbers than fists though I can't say I've ever been down there.'

'No dungeon?' Loki offered and his thumb moved back and forward against my back. I pretended not to notice and made an attempt to keep up the conversation with Sam.

'Actually yes, we have a few cells free if you'd like to rest your head.' Sam quipped.

Loki grinned, 'Fantastic,' he looked at me sideways and his blue eyes narrowed. Whatever he was thinking was neither appropriate nor ethical, 'I think Eva might like to see what improvements we could make to our dungeon considering how easy they are to escape.'

Sam let out a deep exhale through his nose, not quite understanding why Loki would be so interested in that part of the Compound. Though the look which passed over his face told me he trusted Loki enough because Thor and I were here. He wouldn't try anything. At least not anything too dramatic. Nothing Sam couldn't handle.

'Sure, just don't talk to my guy in cell six.'

'Who's in cell six?' I asked.

Sam didn't answer and was already walking ahead of us toward a set of elevators and Loki pressed his hand firmly into my hip once again, fingers splayed, his lips resting on my ear,

'When I get you inside that cell Eva, you're to be a good girl and do as I say.'

'And if I don't?' I uttered. Awaiting his answer with a held breath.

His fingers dug into my hip, crumbling the material of my dress in his hand and his tongue flicked out to trace the shell of my ear. My exhaled breath was a soft moan. Quiet enough for no one else but Loki to hear.

'You'd be surprised the things I'll be willing to do to make you obey me darling.'

Chapter Text

I was losing my fucking mind.

After Loki's assurance that I was to do as I was told, I couldn't think. My body moved, following Sam into the elevators and then down several flights of stairs and another elevator with too many key passes and security checks.

The entire time, my body felt weak. Zapped of any energy as if from his words alone, Loki had taken something from me. My sanity certainly, my ability to judge right from wrong and tell him no, stop, this wasn't okay.

Loki kept his distance, returning to his facade of bored guest and distant, uninvolved uncle. He brushed at the leather sleeves of his Asgardian garb and kept his distance from me, arms folded tightly over his chest.

The worst part was I yearned for him to look at me, for our gazes to catch. I felt like a lovesick girl, wishing to be noticed by the bad boy, his unavailability and disinterest only making my need for him grow.

Frigga's words blared in my mind with every echo of my steps on the marbled floors and every exhaled breath. It seemed I was relying on them as truth. But what use would Frigga have lying to me, she had been honest with me about many things. The worst of them being what havoc I may cause in the future.

I severely doubted her modest suggestion to fuck my uncle - her own son - was not a ruse. Though Frigga and her sons were ancient in my own terms, I did not think if Frigga had a choice in the matter she would haven chosen for Loki and I to be connected. Not physically anyway.

Take him as a lover, I will tire of running, he is still alive for a reason, he is the only one who can rescue me from my own fate.

Her words were a promise, the weight of them now just as heavy as when she had spoken them to me. The more I stewed on them the more I realised that my path was already carved. Just as I was to be Thor's daughter, I played a part in Loki's life and he in mine. A major part, I was to be his.

I looked to him then, Sam was leading us down a long hall explaining the materials used for the cells and Loki's eyes were peering through the translucent glass trying to glance at who was inside to no success. His blue eyes flickered toward me and just as quickly, a deep frown settled on his face. The entire hall was silent, save for the soft hum of electricity.

Sam stopped walking and pointed to an empty cell, punching in a code on the door where it opened a few inches, the glass turned transparent to showcase a grey room, a singular cot against the wall, a toilet and basin, a small shelf for a desk and stool and a tv mounted on the wall.

'This cosy little space is yours if you want it.' Sam said to Loki with a raised brow, 'We haven't had too many complaints yet. Though my guy in cell six did request some music and a punching bag.'

Loki sneered at Sam and I walked inside to escape the retorts I knew Loki would soon be throwing his way.

'Eva,' Loki warned, 'You shouldn't go in there.'

'Why?' I asked and wondered who had been in this cell, anyone of note or particularly evil or just the usual terrorists and assassins.

'Come out.' Loki stood at the doorway and his brow was furrowed, he still wore a deep frown and hesitated to step foot inside the cell.

'He thinks it's a trap.' Sam said and crossed his arms over his chest, leaning on the exterior glass window.

'I do not.' Loki snapped throwing Sam a venomous look.

I sighed, right about the bickering and perched on the bed, surprised at the softness of it. It seemed the Compound was concerned about the state of their prisoner's sleep.

'You do. Otherwise, you'd go inside. I can understand, you're getting flashbacks to when my guys threw your ass away.'

'It didn't last long.' Loki answered and a muscle in his jaw clicked.

'What'd you tell me, you're a god?'

'Yes.'

'Then go inside,' Sam taunted him then his eyes moved toward me, a glint of amusement in them as he chuckled and pointed toward me, 'Are you scared of her?'

'Don't be ridiculous.' Loki's smirked and turned, making his way into the cell backward, eyes on Sam the whole time with a look of triumph. The cell door closed and just as Loki moved toward it to leave, Sam pressed his hand against the keypad and the door made a locking sound.

'What are you doing?' Loki shouted, jiggling the handle of the door.

Sam shrugged, 'Leaving you to your tour,' he smiled at me as I leaned back on the bed, my back hitting the wall. I was in no rush to leave, or take part in their squabbling. I was tired, needing to sleep and be left alone with my thoughts.

'Sorry Princess, I'll let your dad know where to find you once we work out what to do with Slytherin here.'

I shrugged, irritated but knowing it wasn't worth the fight, as Captain America it was Sam's job to protect his country and the world. Loki was once a threat, well really a consistent threat. I understood Sam's concern and admired him for it a little.

He left us be, even as Loki slammed his fists against the glass in agitation, calling out after Sam to release him. But the glass glazed over and the only things we could see were the four walls and one another.

Loki kept his back to me for longer than I thought necessary, I spoke first.

'I'm going to tell you what Frigga said to me.'

This caught his attention - it was only a slight movement but I saw his hands at his sides flex but still, he would not turn, his back heaved with deep breaths and because he didn't tell me to stop, I continued,

'Do you want me to tell you?' I asked and hoped he would turn but he only shifted his head to the side so that I could glance at the thin lines of his downturned mouth set in a frown and hear his answer - whisper-quiet in the small space,

'You'll tell me anyway.'

I waited a while longer but he was preternaturally still, his shoulders a little hunched and his cape swept down behind him only shifting slightly with his heavy breaths.

I didn't wish to twist Frigga's words too much in my favour should Loki truly think I was lying or trying to coerce him into some type of relationship with me. Honestly, I didn't know what I wanted, to take him as a lover, to keep a civil and platonic relationship with him or have him disappear altogether. The latter was no option, Frigga had made it clear.

Intentional. Our bond was intentional.

Written in the stars? A chemical attraction? Was it simply a case of matched personalities or was it just because eventually, our life paths would intertwine?

Fated? Fated. Yes.

The word bounced around in my mind. Yes. That was it. And I hadn't needed any validation besides Frigga's word in Valhalla and the God of Mischief standing before me.

I slipped off of the bed and Loki whirled around as I came closer, close enough that I had to tilt my chin up to meet his stare.

'She told me what you are to me, what you will be.'

'And what is that?' His blue eyes widened in curiosity as I spoke and there in that small room, away from the world and all of the possibilities of what we could and shouldn't be I told him.

'You are my future. Our connection is intentional, it is fated.'

'Fated?' his curiosity truly piqued as he leaned in to hear my next words, confusion danced in his eyes, his lips parted slightly with unspoken questions.

'We could keep up this game for millennia, pretending we don't feel this attraction to one another. I was concerned,' I told him as he nodded to himself and shifted away, beginning to pace in the small space.

I watched him furtively, dismissing my own need to speak louder so he would pay more attention to the importance of my words.

'I was concerned,' I repeated, 'Especially because she outright told me that we should pursue one another intimately.'

I swallowed and only let my gaze slip to him for a small moment, he had stopped pacing and his attention was heavy on me, a small smirk playing at the corners of his mouth.

'Intimately?' he cocked his head to the side and gestured his hand to have me explain.

It was humiliating having to say the words and I had to stop myself from looking at the door, not wanting Loki to see how uncomfortable I was in sharing this with him. My pace thundered and I bit down on my embarrassment and vomited the words before him,

'Frigga said I'm going to take you as a lover. Sex. You and me. That's what she wants.'

The horrified look on his face had me moving toward him with lifted hands, 'No, she didn't say that is what she wants. She told me it is what will happen, we can't avoid it.'

Loki blinked at me and all of it felt ridiculous and he said nothing, just stood there staring at me. My heart dropped and my eyes prickled with unshed tears. I did not blink should they fall from my face and then what would he think? Did he think I was playing at something, trying to seduce him for my own benefit? I could only think of one but truly he would benefit as well.

There were too many repercussions, the biggest was Thor finding out. How horrified would he be, the blame would be put on Loki and that was hardly fair. Would Thor cast him out or would he be willing to listen to my reasoning?

An entire scenario played out in my head by the time Loki closed the space between us. My entire body quivered at his presence, his scent prickling each singular hair on my body, the fire in his eyes probably matched my own.

'You think I will tell you no?'

'Yes.'

'You think little of me and my title then.' his head titled, awaiting my realisation which took a little prompting on his behalf.

'God of Mischief.' I stated, my mind finally catching up as he gestured to the cell around us.

'You wanted me alone.' I internally groaned, he wanted me there with him, to be a good girl and do as I was told. But what would he ask of me? As my eyes raked over him, his black hair which my hands ached to tangle in, his sharp jaw which I wished to drag my teeth over and then down his long form, to his long hands at his sides.

Jesus Christ, how many ways could he kill me with those fine fingers? How many ways could he make me cum with them?

'I've been alive a long while. I know how to put on a good show.'

I didn't doubt it. I'd heard the stories of the shows he used to put on in Asgard and witnessed firsthand the glamour he was capable of fabricating.

'You want to fuck me.'

He sucked in a breath at my words and closed the space between us in one step, his hand raised. I flinched half expecting him to slap me for my foul words but instead, his tone was soft, eyes half-lidded in desire?

'You think me less than a gentleman,' his hand landed upon my cheek and the contact had me sucking in my own breath, his touch was gentle.

'I think you have your own motivations.'

'Which are?' his fingers moved over the soft curve of my jaw, and his lips began to upturn in a small smile as he did so. My throat bobbed holding back a gulp, I wasn't willing to so easily show him how he affected me. I also didn't want him to stop touching me.

'I'm not quite sure yet. I know you want to get rid of me.'

He hummed an agreement and his fingers skimmed over my lips, his thumb dragging down my bottom lip until he cupped my chin and gently lifted my it so I was forced to meet his heated gaze. 'Not yet.'

'What will you do?' my voice was small. Loki did not answer and searched my own eyes, his brows drawn together. 'If I don't obey,' I added.

His free hand moved up my naked arm and his fingertips skimmed over the shape of my breast. My eyes widened at his boldness, how far he was willing to take this. I swallowed back my moan as his fingers skimmed over my breast, a little crease between his brows forming as his fingers skimmed over my pebbled nipple.

'What do you want me to do Evangeline, darling?' he leant down to me, so close I could feel the heat of his breath, he angled his head just so that I could feel the flutter of his lashes against my cheek.

'What will drive you to insanity? Tell me.'

'Tasting you.' I angled my own lips to brush against his own, my eyes fluttered closed as he let out a deep growl and both of his hands moved swiftly, grasping my hair at my scalp and pulling so that my neck was exposed and I had to look through my lashes to see him.

'Open your mouth.'

I did as I was told and Loki spat into my mouth, he let go of my hair and presses his hands down upon my shoulders. I sank down onto my knees, my vision clouded in pale blue, but it was in fact the colour of Loki's skin, a pallid hue. I swallowed back his spit and he let out another deep guttural growl as I placed both of my hands on his thighs.

Before me, his erection strained against his leather trousers and I was hungry for him. To see the length of him, to taste him and have him slide into the back of my throat. Though he thought himself in control of me on my knees, I knew that I could make him desperate for me.

I craved it. I wanted to see how he looked when he released himself in the back of my throat. I wanted him to moan my name.

Loki reached to lift my chin so that I could meet his gaze now turning bright red, 'I want you to keep your eyes on me, pet. I want to remember the look on your face when you taste me. When I slide into the velvet of your mouth and unleash myself. I need you to keep your eyes on me, darling.'

I could only nod as he commanded me to open my mouth once again, three of his long fingers slipping into his mouth to suck upon them and then moving to my lips to coat them with his own spit.

I clenched my thighs together, wet. Needing him inside of me. But not now. Now I had to taste him. And then after...

I caught Loki's wrist before he could release himself for me and he threw me a look of concern, it was questionable and honest. I knew he would stop if I asked.

'There's something else.'

'I'll be gentle, Eva.' I dropped his wrist and struggled to tell him the important part of what Frigga revealed to me. In a gentle gesture, Loki tucked a piece of my straying hair behind my ear. As if he could sense my fear, his eyes clouded in concern, the crimson colour receded, lips pressed together tightly. Did he think I was already regretting this, was he thinking the same?

'I have to tell you there will be more than this.'

'Of course, there will be.' he caressed my cheek once again.

'No, Loki. Frigga didn't only say we were involved intimately. It is more than sex.'

As if the entire room had turned frigid, I felt Loki's interest wane. He knew what I was speaking of, my expectations. His hand dropped from my face.

'She had told me of how you need to be loved. How so many have abandoned you. You deserve it Loki. And I'm more than willing to do so, in time.'

'No.' he said.

'It is my fate. To love you. Even if so many haven't. Frigga said. She told me that our bond was intentional. I think we're fated. I've always believed in things happening for a reason and-'

'No.' his head shook fiercely, black curls moving around his face as he took a small step backward from me, 'No, Eva. No.'

I felt something lodge in my throat, something akin to desperation to try and form the right words. It was more so the fact that Loki had begun to recoil from me.

'Whatever it is I become, you are the key to helping me through it or avoiding it. She wasn't specific. Even if it is all a lie, I must love you. Even if they are nothing but empty words, eventually I could mean it and you-'

'No. No. You have no clue, you have no idea.' he was on his own knees before me grasping my face in both of his hands, 'You are being misguided by the words of a long-dead goddess, her wishes for her own misguided son's happiness. Happiness is not mine, it never has been.'

'And I could change that I could-'

Loki shoved me away and stood, moving backward until his back was against the far wall.

'No. Stay away from me, Eva. I swear it, I will sooner kill you than be led into a trap like that.'

'But Frigga said,' I shook my own head, annoyance at my incoherent thoughts not forming into the words I wanted.

'Frigga is dead!' Loki's voice was raised, a singular finger pointed out toward me, 'And you were not there. You have never been there, on my path, as a part of my life. You are nothing. You do not exist, they didn't ever speak of you. It was never going to be you. It was not meant to be you.'

Loki's words were incoherent, I began to wonder how much he knew of his own fate.

'Are you so scared, of what it might mean? To be loved by someone unconditionally.'

'Yes.' he did not hesitate, 'And if I were to choose someone it wouldn't be you. It should have been-'

He did not finish that sentence and I did not wish to stay there knelt on the floor before him, rejected; belittled and feeling like some foolish child relying on a prophecy spoken by her deceased grandmother.

Loki was right. It shouldn't be me. I don't think I could handle the rejection, the games, the constant feeling of dread when he opened his mouth to shut down my feelings. He was an ancient god, he was a mix of emotions and span of lifetimes muddled together with loss and pain and I did not wish for the rest of my existence to mirror his.

I got to my feet and sat upon the bed once more, dragging my knees up to my chin. Biting down hard on my tongue to keep the tears from falling. Truly, my rejection didn't need to be vocalised anymore.

My heart curled in my chest, a bitterness spreading throughout my entire body for the man in the room.

Neither of us spoke until Thor arrived. It could have been hours, it could have been a few minutes but the entire time I felt I had been holding my breath.

Thor popped his head into the room and it was my turn to play my part, to prove Loki right.

It wouldn't be me. I would go back to being his insolent niece and him my annoying uncle.

'You alright?' Thor asked, looking between Loki and I.

'Fine.' I answered and brushed past him into the hall. It wasn't until we reached the first flight of stairs Thor shared with us that we had been invited to stay the night.

'What for?' I asked.

'Tony's birthday.' Thor smiled but there was sadness around his eyes.

'Isn't he dead?' Loki asked. I did not acknowledge him.

'It is a celebration for the hero he was. I thought it best we stay and honour him.'

'Great.' I said through my teeth. More time spent in the presence of Loki, avoiding him and pretending he hadn't absolutely humiliated me in the space of minutes.

When we reached the elevator, the three of us inside I thought to ask Thor something I should have when I first arrived,

'When we get back home I want Kit released.'

Thor opened his mouth, probably to tell me it wasn't a great idea, 'And I want you to throw me a ball.'

The elevator dinged and we walked out into a quiet hallway, a woman dressed all in black holding a tablet lead us to our rooms.

'A ball?' Thor asked incredulously, 'Have you got a celebration in mind?'

'I want to find a husband.' and at my words, I felt eyes burning into the back of my head.

If Loki didn't want me as his lover, then I would just have to find someone who would.

Chapter Text

The room was cast in low light, bodies were packed together tightly and I was dressed in a gown similar to that of the one Thor had gifted me for my arrival party, though the cut of the dress was questionable as well as the train which followed it and the circlet crown which sat upon my head.

All eyes were on me.

Us.
Thor and I. The God of Thunder, King of New Asgard - now a kingdom recognised on earth - and his daughter the Princess of New Asgard, future goddess of something.

People stared, offered their welcome and information about who they were, and what they could offer us. Thor was a natural and worked the room taking in the crowd and their awe, in his stride. He beamed as he introduced me. To some of the men, he mentioned the upcoming hall in New Asgard.

I was enraptured by it all. More specifically the stares of the men Thor had invited to the palace. Their grins were hidden in their glasses as they drank, eyes raking over me beside Thor. The entire time their thoughts would have been on me.

It was a power I enjoyed. Having these men under my control, my power. I held their fate in my hands. One word to Thor, one pointed finger to tell him who I wanted and my wish would be granted.

None so far had been worthy though as the music grew louder and the number of glasses of champagne I had consumed turned into double digits; my eyes searched the crowd for someone I had been eager to approach.

But even as my eyes scanned the room, my stomach turned on itself in dread that I might see Loki. He was not who I looked for and I truly believed he wouldn't show up. Nearly everyone in the Avengers Compound had an indifferent attitude toward him, but then again he was the God of Mischief and what better way to cause a little trouble than right in the heart of the party.

My eyes caught a few times momentarily on flashes of dark hair or green clothing. I mentally kicked myself for allowing myself to feel nervous, scared really of seeing him.

We would go back to being nothing to one another. He would go back to being nothing to me.

I kept up my search for the one I wanted. The Avengers had floated around the room most of the night, all of them were in the room somewhere but due to the expanse of the crowd I had only seen Bruce as well as Peter who had been sent to bed after trying to steal a bottle of champagne from behind the bar and Ant-Man who very quickly introduced himself as Scott and invited himself to our palace uninvited; sharing with us he hadn't ever been to Norway.

I hadn't seen Sam and the man I knew would inevitably be stuck by his side - Bucky Barnes, the Winter Soldier.

Maybe it was the alcohol in my system or the fucking crown on my head but I asked around and was given a few gawking stares and shrugged shoulders until someone pointed me toward the terrace where the party continued.

A little giddy, I moved through the crowd to the large glass doors overlooking the terrace and expanse of manicured lawns beyond.

I was stopped mid-stride as a hand shot out to grab my arm. It was Loki.

At my glance toward his hand, fingers curled around me - his touch cool against my bare forearm - he dropped it. I almost winced at how much that affected me, like he was bothered by it.

'Eva,' my name on his lips was pure heaven, and there was something akin to hope which spread through my chest. That maybe he had reflected upon everything I had told him, that he would tell me he had only needed time to process it all, that we would have to go about things a certain way.

Instead, he straightened and smoothed down his black jacket and cleared his throat, 'Your father is looking for you.'

'That's all?' I breathed, hanging onto his words and trying to decipher if the way in which his blue eyes widened at me were in desperation or confusion. He looked divine dressed in all black, the suit fitted perfectly and made him hard not to look at. He was far too handsome for someone so wicked. But that was the worst part, that despite how disgusting he had been toward me I wanted him desperately.

Jesus Christ, what had Frigga's words done to me? Was this always her intention, had she only just planted a seed so that I might think my desire toward him was my own idea? Being attracted to him proved a problem and I only knew one way to scratch that itch. The only issue was that he had no inclination to return the favour. Not anymore.

Loki's lips parted just so, that I imagined running my tongue over the soft pinkness of them. I wished right then and there he would kiss me,

'Don't start to put me in your fantasies. It's not a place I wish to belong.' he knocked me on the chin as one would a child and never had I felt so belittled. I shrivelled away from him, only slightly and he didn't seem to like that I did that as he leant down to me, face turned up into a sneer, voice like pure venom,

'What you are incapable of understanding Eva, is that I will never want you.'

'You did want me.' I shot back, my head shaking slightly. Did he need me to remind him of every one of our interactions since first meeting? I had felt something. He had too. I knew it. I was capable of understanding how a man showed his desire and Loki's was obviously akin to something possessive and animalistic. I had felt it sometimes when he had looked at me; like he had put a silent claim upon me.

'Do you hear how stupid you sound?' he laughed at me, 'Oh don't look so heartbroken, Evangeline. I wanted a place to bury my cock. And I would have delighted in defiling you in a number of ways had you not thought to convince yourself that it could mean anything else but sex.'

I blinked at him, swallowing down the growing lump in my throat. I wasn't an idiot. I knew that the words he threw at me had intended to ruffle me, to make me cry or run from him. Instead, I only nodded,

'Frigga was wrong. About people not knowing how to love you. It's because they are incapable of loving someone so empty as you, so undeserving of anything good. I think she only loved you because she pitied you. I won't do the same.'

Loki's expression blanched, his brows twitching as he took in my words and at my levelled stare there was disbelief on his behalf that I would not take them back or coddle him. I was done.

My body felt far away as I turned from him and wobbled on my heels, heading toward the doors of the terrace. I wouldn't allow myself to look back, least of all should he believe I wanted him to follow or worse, should he believe I hadn't meant what I said.

Outside I was greeted by fresh, heavy air. Above me clouds shifted in the dark navy sky, the terrace illuminated by a flash of stars and warm lights. It was quieter on the terrace and though earlier I had been searching for Bucky, I decided that right then, as shaken and off-kilter as I was - also a little drunk - that now was not the time to fangirl over my favourite Avenger. I would instead tell Thor to invite him to my ball.

I bit down on a smirk at the thought of having my very own Cinderella moment with the Winter Soldier. Maybe he would leave his vibranium arm on the steps of the palace and I would have to seek him out to return it before making him my Prince Consort. I doubted the world would mind should I immortalise Bucky Barnes' handsome face.

As I was lost in my childish thoughts, someone shoved past me but did not offer an apology as a small group of people pushed forward to a rung ladder set into the far side of the terrace wall.

Intrigued, I followed. There were six of them - all males, young and fit. They jibed at each other as they climbed the ladder one after another. I glanced around and no one took much notice of the group, similarly dressed guards walked the terrace. Were they moving toward a threat, was it some type of training?

I slipped off my heels and climbed, swearing a few times as my gown caught beneath my feet. As I reached the roof and glanced down, several onlookers had thrown me suspicious looks. I had half the mind to offer them a curtesy.

The men gathered around in a tight circle on the middle of the roof uttering words to one another I couldn't hear. There was nothing of importance up there.

The men shifted toward the edge of the roof and my curiosity led me forward. One of them caught me following them and nudged the guy beside him.

'Hey, we've caught the attention of an Avenger!'

Like meerkats, the heads of all of the men whirled around until all eyes were on me. I lost my nerve and shifted back to the ladder but a dark-haired man started toward me and waved me over.

'Come on, you can watch the show.' He leered at me.

I shifted on my feet, 'I'm not an Avenger.'

He shrugged, some of the other men chuckled, 'Thor's daughter. That's pretty impressive. What are you, a god?'

'Goddess.' I shot back but instantly regretted my answer as he snatched at my arm and dragged me toward the edge of the roof so I was stood side by side with the other men.

It was a long drop down to the ground. Several other balconies jutted out at lower levels. Concrete paved each landing. My hands shook at my sides.

And then one of the men was scaling the wall, jumping and flipping his way down each level until a few moments later, with my breath held, he landed on the ground in a tumble before he straightened himself and offered his two middle fingers to everyone who looked down from the roof.

The man beside me laughed, 'I didn't think he'd have the balls.'

'Why the hell would he do that?' I piped up, my voice wavering as I shifted back from the edge of the roof.

'It's part of our training. Us normal people have to try and keep up with your kind.' He did not deliver his words kindly.

I wished I had Thor's powers so I could bring down a strike of lighting and have him jump off of the roof in fear. He caught my smirk and his hand raised to press against my back,

'Go on, Princess.'

I shoved back but he insisted, 'Don't!'

The others turned to see what was going on and began taunting me, I panicked and screamed as he laughed and continued to press me to the edge of the roof.

My body tensed and my vision wavered at the fear rising in my gut. I felt I would be sick. I shoved back but couldn't meet his strength and had nothing to use as leverage as he shoved me forward again and the world before me tilted as I began to fall.

I closed my eyes as a scream tore from my throat. But instead of the sensation of falling, I felt myself being torn backward, heard the clouds over me crash and rain poured down over me as I collapsed onto the ground.

My hands pressed into the flat surface of the roof and my chest rattled with a gasp as I opened my eyes to see a blur of movement and then I looked up to see Loki standing facing the remaining men on the roof.

He shot a glance at me, his eyes darkened and brows lowered.

As he turned back to the group of men, one whipped his hand around and pulled out a gun to shoot at him. The bullet was redirected as Loki shot out a hand to shift it from his path.

'That was a mistake.' A feral grin tore across his face as the rain poured down over us. As he parted his arms the men fell to their knees with audible groans over the rain and thunder.

The colour of the sky shifted and the lightening hissed around us in colours of deep emerald and white.

Loki knelt before me, lifting my chin to meet his gaze, his eyes not leaving mine as he spoke, his voice a low growl,

'But your biggest mistake was thinking you could lay hands on my Princess.'

'Loki,' I gasped knowing what he was going to do, my hands grasped his forearms but he shook me off. He pressed two fingers to my lips and stood to face the men on their knees.

'And as I've been told several times,' he flicked both his wrists and two long daggers appeared in his hands, 'I am empty and lacking a soul. So killing you all won't bother me at all.'

Chapter Text

The world shifted in colours of black, white and green. Rain pelted down from the skies and diluted the blood of the dead men lying before me, like small rivers of red running toward me, reaching out like lifeless tears.

Loki was standing above me his breath even as his twin daggers disappeared from his hands. He must have said something but I didn't respond, not until he knelt before me. I couldn't comprehend his words, not with the beat of the rain all around me and my thundering heart and the cold pressing in on my skin.

'Why did you do that?' My voice was a whisper.

'They touched you.' there was no hint of remorse in his tone.

I eyed him, completely entranced at the sight of him kneeling before me in the rain. His black hair was drenched and hanging around his chin, water running in rivulets down his straight nose. His eyes were blue fire circled with red and again I was shocked to see the cool pallor of his skin.

'You hate me.' I told him, shoving him backward by his chest but he did nothing, his brows only lowered as I raised my voice to be heard over the static rage of my mind and the pouring rain falling around us. eyes more

'You did this on purpose.' the moment the words came out, a heavy weight settled on my chest. My hands shot out again but Loki's own shot up too fast and caught my wrists and squeezed them tight. I tried to rip them from his grasp but his grip was like iron.

His breath was warm on my face as he hissed his words at me, a smirk danced upon his pink lips, 'Look at my power. Look at what I am capable of. Do you think what I have done has consequences?'

No. There wouldn't be, there never was. Short imprisonments, banishments which were quickly forgotten. Loki got away with the Battle of New York and near-decimating an entire city and its population and still my father was foolish enough to forgive but not forget.

Did he truly believe that because he had returned from death - that Thor had been left with his grief for Loki for so long - that he could get away with such vile actions? The world had ended and begun again but this time we were less forgiving, any threat was eradicated. It was a regret Thor had told me he and his friends had had when they had lost to Thanos.

Loki gave my wrists a tight squeeze as if he could feel me on the precipice of spiralling. My entire body trembled from the cold of the rain now settled onto my skin, even pooled around me I could feel the weight of my dress. A gift from Thor ruined.

'What did you want me to do?' Loki asked.

'Nothing?' I told him and felt my eyes well with unshed tears. I squinted my eyes so that no tears would fall. His form blurred in front of me, 'You didn't have to fucking do anything!'

'You wish I had not intervened, Evangeline? You wish I had let you fall to your death?' his chin jerked and again the blue of his irises bled to red, a common effect when he was angry.

'You're an idiot.' he exhaled lengthily and briskly stood so that I was staring at his shoes. I managed to shuffle to my feet though I struggled slightly to lift my dress with me. I could not escape him as a long look was shot my way, it made my stomach flutter, the intensity behind it although I couldn't begin to guess if it was lustful, rageful, playful or any other spectrum of emotions he was capable of acting out so well.

'You're making me one.' my voice wavered. I should have realised sooner how far into his bullshit he would drag me. He was near-immortal and bored. Loki thrived off of drama and the politics of emotions. I had known since first meeting him what fire he would set my world on, he wore the horns but I had imagined him in a glorious fucking halo.

Had I not craved a different life from the one I left behind, a new start, happiness, love, family? Not this, not another state of unhappiness disguised as gratification. I had looked at him and seen a possibility, a connection and he had looked at me like something to fucking conquer. Was I that difficult to love? Who had he let in? Who was it he had been referring to in that cell, who had it been if not me?

Frigga was wrong. Loki would not save me.

I forced myself to look at what he had done, in order to fuel my growing contempt for him or rather as just a reminder that this could not continue. Innocent people's blood would be on my hands but he would drive the blade.

Their throats were slit. It had been so easy for Loki to walk toward them and slide his daggers across the folds of their throats and drain the life from their bodies. Some had shot at him only for the bullets to be turned into green mist. He had grinned the entire time, but afterwards when he had seen me watching him he had faltered. It had been a slight widening of his eyes followed by a shift of his eyes onto the daggers in his hands. His lips parted but he said nothing because one of the men had groaned and Loki had slammed the blade down into his chest.

I don't think I had breathed the entire time. It had all transpired in seconds. And everything I had believed him to be, everything I had wanted him to be had disintegrated.

I was scared to love him only for him to sharpen his daggers on my heart with a wicked smile and venomous words of rejection. I know he could turn me into a shell of a woman, he could bind me to him for eternity only for him to remind me I would never be enough.

The world felt a little sharper around me at those thoughts. Like I could grasp my future, one I had chosen for myself. Not one handed to me by Thor or Frigga or Loki. My lips quirked at the memory of his words, meant to hurt me, intended to drive me away.

You are nothing. You do not exist, they didn't ever speak of you. It was never going to be you. It was not meant to be you.

So be it. It would be easier to hate him than love him. Fuck Frigga and the preposterous words she had told me, fuck Thor and his aloof parenting and fuck Loki for trying to ruin me for anyone else.

I drove forward and grasped his jacket and despite his strength, I had caught Loki off guard and managed to skate him backward to the edge of the roof.

'Eva!' he gasped, eyes wide and feet stumbling to find purchase on the slippery concrete.

I did not stop even as we tilted over the edge and Loki let out a scream but we did not end up falling. The world moved and we did with it as I backed him up against a wall. Loki's shock was not hidden as his scream became a strangled sound in his throat.

'You will never raise a blade to an innocent man again.' I shoved my forearms underneath his neck so that he had to lift his chin to drag in some air.

'Eva,' his voice was a low growl. I took it as a warning but my entire body trembled with rage and the cold which had settled into my skin from the rain was nothing but numbness now. I was hot with hatred for the man before me.

'Answer me!' I pushed him harder into the wall and he raised his hands in surrender.

'Okay, Eva. Okay.'

I blew out a breath and retreated from him as if he had burnt me, he hesitated in lowering his head should I slam him back into the wall. At my feet, my dress pooled in a puddle, a tingling green light slid up mine and Loki's bodies and we were dry, returned to our previous states. No blood on us, no proof of what he had done and what I had allowed.

I wasn't sure where exactly we were or how we had gotten there but as I shifted my gaze around I noticed it to be the foyer of the Compound.

The room was darkened by the night sky filtered through the glass ceilings above us. Loki was pressed in the space between two elevators. It was silent save for the hum of the party upstairs.

In the corner of my vision Loki shifted minutely and I shot back a glare toward him to find his eyes roving over me appreciatively.

'I wonder if I touch you if your cunt will be as wet as it was that first night?'

I couldn't help the flush that spread across my face and burnt a trail down my neck, breasts and settled into my lower body. I was already wet for him, needy. His filthy words alone had my pussy pulsing.

I said nothing but he curled one finger out toward me.

'Come here, let me kiss you.'

I attempted to change the direction of the conversation. If I brought him back to reality and the fact there would be dire consequences to his actions he might have shaken himself out of his animalistic urge to conquer me.

'They're going to kill you, you know.'

He did not reply but instead grabbed me and whirled me, softly pressing me against the wall. I bit my lip not allowing a treacherous moan to escape my lips, not like last time.

His hands pressed against the sides of my head, blocking me in. My legs tightened and as Loki leant down to press his lips against mine my skin goose-bumped.

It was a simple caress of a kiss. Both of us were restraining ourselves, the wall cracked both sides of my head where his palms met the wall and my hands curled into fists at my sides. I would not fold, I would not touch him.

Loki's tongue flicked across my lips but still I did not falter until he pushed it inside of my mouth and I tasted him. He groaned, loudly and his hands pressed beside my head moved to grasp my waist and squeeze as his tongue fucked my mouth, his teeth nipping at my bottom lip and a deep guttural growl tore from his throat into my own. I clenched my fists tighter.

It was torturous.

Loki could not get close enough, his body pressed so tightly against mine and his mouth devouring mine that I had to shift my head to gasp for a breath but it only made him ravenous, a hand slipping from my waist to press a finger under my chin and tilt my face back to his as he continued the kiss in an urgent and hungry manner. I was pained to admit to myself that I was relishing the taste and feel of him.

Loki's fingers dragged down my sides and back up again as he curled his fingers in the fabric of my skirts and lifted them.

I tensed at feeling his fingers on my bare thighs, conscious of the marks there, conscious of how thick they might have felt to him. Not like this slight women of

As if sensing my fear, Loki pulled back from the kiss and nipped at my jaw,

'Don't cower from me Evangeline. Please never cower from me, darling.'

My spine curved in invitation for him to further his touch. As my dress hitched and gathered at my waist he grasped my bottom lip between his teeth and pulled the pressure of his teeth making it swell. My breath rushed out of me.

'Hold your dress up.'

And at his demand I did as he lowered himself on his knees before me. His head flicked back to move his raven hair from his face and seeing him knelt before me, blue eyes wide and vulnerable in his submissive stance - I grinned.

So did he as he produced one of his daggers from thin air and held up the silvered blade. I froze, he cocked his hair and I felt the pressure of the air, his skin a shade lighter.

'Part your legs.' It was not a suggestion but a demand. I did as I was asked, his eyes on me the entire time. Mine on the blade in his hand, my knuckles white with the tight grip I had on my dress.

The room was still silent. No one came to stumble upon us. What a sight. The Princess of New Asgard with her skirts around her waist, her uncle on his knees before her. Ready to what?

My spine arched off the wall but Loki shot out a hand to press against my thigh and tutted,

'Do you trust me?' This time his voice was not lust filled, his eyes did not dance with mischief. He needed an honest answer.

I couldn't lie, couldn't form the words and speak them aloud so I could only meet his gaze and nod my head once, my conscious thoughts levelled onto his flat palm on my thigh holding me back, the searing pleasure his touch brought me.

Loki lipped his lips and nodded himself, his hand moved from my thigh to yank my panties down to my knees. He sucked in a breath at the sight of my pussy level with his face. I blushed and closed my eyes, wishing for it to be over. Wishing for him to never stop.

'Eyes on me, pet.'

I did as he asked but he did not touch me. I gripped my skirts harder, nails digging into the fabric, holding on for dear life. I felt like I might have passed out. I nearly did as Loki flipped the dagger in his hand so that the blade cut through his palm, the hilt aimed toward me.

I nodded again, not allowing myself a moment to think about what he might do, what it might do to me.

Then the sharp cold of the hilt of the dagger was pressed against the wet folds of my pussy and I gasped and a wicked grin tore across Loki's face. He shifted forward in his knees and squeezed his palm around the dagger. Blood ran down his hand and into the sleeve of jacket.

I swallowed and then ever so slightly he pressed the hilt into my pussy. My eyes rolled back at the sensation, cold steel met my hot, wet core.

'Eyes on me.' Loki told me.

I couldn't comprehend what had happened but my body took control, my legs parted further, my hips arched closer to him.

My eyes were back on him and then he thrusted the blade into my pussy, slowly, torturing my body and soul as I bit down hard on my lip to stop the moan that bubbled up in my chest from escaping.

He was careful with me, blue eyes never leaving my own in case I flinched or changed my mind.

I felt my climax build at the sensation of the blade inside of me, filling me, his hot levelled glare, smirk playing on pretty lips. I hoped to stain his dagger with my cum, to have him carry it around and grasp it with a hint of smile on his lips knowing it had been inside of me. That he had fucked me with it himself.

I could smell my scent of sex, the musky smell of my juices and his own desire, visible through his pants as he knelt. I could smell the tang of the iron of his blood as he bled for me, my own pleasure brought him pain.

But he did not stop fucking me, he did not grimace or withdraw from me. His pace fastened at my sharp exhale, I hadn't wanted to show him how desperate I needed the release.

Loki's free hand fluttered down to his crotch where he grasped himself through his pants. The sight had me reeling,

'I wish it were you.' my voice was a high moan as I came. My entire body quivered as I let out several small whimpers as my pussy coated his dagger hilt in a flood of wetness.

After my come down, my body slumped against the wall and my legs felt weak. The hilt was removed slowly, carefully as Loki stood, dagger still firmly in his closed palm.

He smelt different, his scent rich and heady. My panties were pulled up abruptly and I could do nothing but watch him in the darkened room, all of his attention on me.

I had no thoughts. My conscience had disappeared with the sight of his dagger, him before me on his knees. I never would have imagined such a wild sight.

Loki's blade disappeared and he waved his bloodied palm before me, blood rained down the sleeve of his jacket and dropped to the floor at my feet. He showcased the blood his chin high and chest lifted and I had half the heart to apologise before he cupped his bloodied palm against my panties.

'I will not bleed for anyone but you.'

As he separated himself from me and the elevator dinged beside me. I dropped my skirts just as someone stepped out. He showcased a self satisfied smile.

I couldn't help to do so as well as his blood spread through the thin fabric of my panties, some of it dripped down my thighs. Marking me. I wish it were his cum.

Loki's spine straightened and like he had heard my thoughts he drew his eyes to me and slightly raised one eyebrow.

'There you two are.' Thor greeted us as he stepped out of the elevator. 'Have you finally decided to show some kindness to your niece, Loki?'

Loki's wounded hand clenched at his side as he cocked his head and bore his eyes into mine with a knowing look.

'It was painful but so worth it, dear brother.'

Chapter Text

We departed the Compound before the party was over.

After almost catching Loki and me, Thor gestured for us to follow him back to the ship parked on the grass outside. Loki and I did as asked, walking behind Thor on the damp grass, the rain had stopped pouring and only drizzled on us in a fine mist. It did wonders to chill my burning skin.

I hadn't spoken or even looked at Loki since Thor had arrived. I planned not to as if Thor might catch me eyeballing Loki and guess what had happened between us or caught the scent hanging off of me.

I felt dirty, not only from what had been done to me but the simple fact that my uncle had gotten on his knees and fucked me with the hilt of his dagger before my father had walked out of an elevator and we had greeted him as if nothing had happened.

What felt the vilest was that I had liked it and had Loki's bloodied handprint imprinted on my panties, his dried blood between my thighs. I didn't want to wash it off just yet.

Before we reached the spaceship, I glanced back to look up at the roof of the Compound where those bodies laid scattered and I swallowed down the bile in my throat. How would we be reprimanded, what would happen to us when someone inevitably went up there to find the mess Loki left? We were saved briefly by the downpour of rain and Loki's emerald storm as people had scattered back inside but how many more hours did we have until we were found out as murderers? Would the palace of New Asgard be stormed? Would agents stalk in and steal us away, arrest us, kill us?

I couldn't focus on anything but my clanging footsteps on the metal gangplank and my daunting thoughts of my capture and Thor's look of horror at finding out the truth. What had I risked, what would I lose? Another chance at life I knew that much. A new life, the only one I had left would be ripped out from beneath me. Because I had gotten drunk and a little adventurous and Loki had thought to play the villainous hero to the princess in distress.

A brief touch caressed my hand and I looked to see Loki walking beside me, his brows pulled together in concern for my shifting gaze and tight lips. I shook my head, not wanting to start with him again. I was exhausted honestly, my head pounded from all that had transpired and all I wished was to slip into bed and sleep. To pretend it had all been a sweet, naughty little nightmare.

I focused my gaze forward and Thor's huge form shifted to showcase the high-tech space. I hadn't been inside a spaceship before and it was exactly as I expected. Neon lighting flashed in strips on the walls, and the cockpit consisted of a multitude of lit-up screens and buttons I had no idea what would do. Thor hammered a few buttons, his shoulders drawn together tensely as he let out a curse and the air whooshed behind me as the gangplank disappeared and the door closed sealing us in.

I didn't bother taking a tour or asking any questions as I felt something shift in the quiet space, a tight string of tension connecting the three of us. The ship hummed and took off and Thor stood with his hands spread out on the cockpit not bothering to talk to either Loki or me who took up seats opposite one another. As I buckled myself in Loki threw his head back and exhaled deeply as his eyes fluttered closed.

Thor turned at the dramatic sound and crossed his arms across his chest, his muscles bulged as did a large vein in his neck as he addressed both his brother and me in a booming blur of words,

'Both of you are consumed with your need to gain my attention.'

Loki did not open his eyes but his lips quirked with a smirk. I swallowed and itched to squirm in my seat as Thor's blue eyes bore into mine as he let out a disappointed huff at finding Loki's gaze unwilling to meet his own.

'Well,' Thor lifted his chin, 'Aren't you going to answer me?'

'No.' I answered merely because I didn't want to have that conversation with Thor and frankly I had no idea if he was talking about the entanglement I was getting caught up in with Loki or the dead bodies rotting in the rain on the roof of the Avengers Compound or seeing his dead mother in Valhalla and finding out that my fate was reliant on entering into a depraved relationship with my uncle.

I continued despite Thor's chin jutting out and his gritted teeth, the sky outside thundered with the threat of lightning. Fuck it, it had been a shitty past twenty-four hours - or three weeks depending on the timeline, if he wanted to make the conversation about him I would give him one,

'I'm in no mood to be lectured by the likes of an absentee father who has spent my entire life too consumed in swinging around his giant, shiny tools and showing off to his costumed friends than raising his own daughter.' the words flew out of my mouth in a rush of quick breaths and they must have hit Thor hard because he actually flinched.

His mouth opened to offer a weak excuse of an apology, his blue eyes softening and the neon lighting even made it look like his eyes wavered with unshed tears but it was the sound of Loki's rasped laughter that had us both pausing and turning to look at him seated beside me.

Loki had raised both his hands to his face and laughed into his palms - now clean I noticed - and his chest shook with the deep and rumbling tone until he removed his hands and his eyes lit up with amusement, at seeing him so carefree, wearing such a delighted expression, my heart squeezed.

He turned to me and smiled and I felt the world had - only if for a small moment - stopped turning because that smile was directed at me. Smile lines creased the sides of his blue eyes as they sparkled, his cheeks rounded with the width of his smile which only showcased two twin dimples on either side of his face and the God of Mischief glowed.

His aura was lit with a soft green light which had my fingers aching to reach out and touch it if only to feel the purity of it, the goodness of it. He could have kissed me with poison on his lips and suffocated me with promises of my own death and I would have bowed at his fucking feet at that moment.

Loki Laufeyson was consuming me and I was spinning out of control, something in my chest felt pulled toward him, I needed him, I needed him to consume me, to claim me in some animalistic and ancient way I had no capable way of understanding.

Loki's smile fell into an impish smirk and I could do nothing but blink at him and watch as his hand reached out to tug on a piece of my hair,

'Darling Eva, never in all my years have I heard someone reduce my dear brother, the God of Thunder down to an image comparable to that of a manic blacksmith.' his tone still conveyed humour and that delicious rasp from his dissipating laughter.

'Enough, the both of you.' Thor cleared his throat and straightened and Loki's smirk reappeared as he rolled my hair between his thumb and forefinger, my skin flushed and my heart beat rapidly in my chest at his closeness, I wanted to slip his fingers into my mouth and suck on them.

'Can't take a little joke, dear brother?' Loki finally dropped my hair and reclined in his seat, looking up at Thor with a lowered brow, 'She's right though, you should have been slightly more concerned about where she had been for three weeks.'

'I don't need your judgment Loki.' Thor snapped and looked then to me, 'I was concerned. I did what I could to find you.'

'Everything except look yourself.' Loki's eyes rolled and Thor hadn't liked the gesture as his brows lowered and his forehead creased into a tight frown,

'I had a kingdom to run.'

'Eva is your daughter,' and all dramatics from Loki were gone as he stood swiftly to face Thor, 'Shouldn't family take precedence over everyone else?'

'Suddenly you believe yourself to care for this family, where have you been for six years, brother?'

Loki stiffened as he and Thor stared one another down, I could only anticipate the worst as thunder boomed around us, so close the ship shook. My hands grasped onto the straps across my chest as if truly Thor might crack the ship wide open.

'I have my secrets as you have yours,' Loki shifted forward slightly with a finger raised at my father 'Be thankful I came back.'

'I should have known you wouldn't give me an apology.' Thor's face softened slightly at his words like he was already giving up on the argument, it would be a mindless circle of taunting. Thor had been accustomed to it for centuries.

'For what?' Loki hissed.

'For letting me believe you were dead all these years.' Thor stepped forward, thunder boomed again and the ship rattled. I tightened my grip on the straps.

'You had Eva.' Loki shook his head, like it was enough of an explanation for Thor not to miss him.

'She was not enough.'

I sucked in a sharp breath at my father's words as they squeezed at my heart. How quickly my existence had been disregarded.

'Take it back,' Loki warned, stepping closer to Thor as he raised himself to his full height. Thor jerked his head back at Loki's sudden defensiveness and wild look, though he did not cower as most would have.

'I didn't mean it like that Eva,' Thor raised his hands toward me, again his brows knitted together and his eyes pleaded with me. Such openness came from, such humility compared to what Loki offered. I believed Thor, it hadn't meant the words hurt any less.

'What did you mean?' I asked and leaned forward slightly so I could hear the words, in what way was I not enough? To ease his grief? Did my presence not alleviate the gaping wound that Loki left in the small family he made up with Thor? Or had he wanted someone else, had he wanted a son born in his image, did he expect me more powerful, more useful.

'I just feel it difficult to be your father.' and Thor laid the words out in the open and the long and knowing look he shared with me made it crystal clear he knew where I had been these past three weeks. He had known about my fate, Frigga had told him at some stage.

'You know,' I said, 'You've known this whole time.'

Loki lost in his own angry thoughts continued his conversation with Thor, 'You find it difficult to be her father?'

'Don't start Loki,' Thor flicked his hand out toward his brother as if it could stop him from talking.

'You despised Odin for what he did to me, how he treated me, you are doing no different.' Loki shifted closer to Thor who shifted closer to me in my seat.

'I am not father. I will never cast her out.' Thor's teeth were bared as he said the words.

'This is about the prophecy,' I continued, fiddling with the straps holding me to the seat 'You know.' I breathed a huge sigh as the strap released and I stood from the seat, rounding it to put some space between the two unsettled gods before me.

'Yes.' Thor's voice was a whisper.

'What will you do, keep your distance and give her pretty dresses and princes to dance with in hopes to keep her happy and away from you! Ignore her as Odin did me? Convince yourself she can't be your daughter.' Loki kept going, using biting and hate-filled words directed at Thor maybe to cover up where our conversation would inevitably lead to. Did Thor know that much, had Frigga been completely honest about my fate or only shared parts of it with my father?

'Enough, Loki!' Thor growled and the ship shook in a crash as lightning split across the glass of the cockpit. I stumbled and gripped the seat in front of me to keep from falling.

'I've been trying to not tell you, to protect you.' Thor closed in on me and I didn't trust him but I was desperate to hear his explanation. To hear what he thought of Frigga's words. But was he fearful of me or what I might become? Did it come from a place of concern as my father or terror as the God of Thunder?

The look on his face told me fear as when I inched closer to him he retreated. He was trying to protect himself and the rest of the fucking world, he had lured me into that palace to fill my head with fairytales and dreams of having whatever I wanted - should it distract me.

'No,' hysterical laughter bubbled from my chest, in which world was this all real, in which world would I become a being so powerful Thor Odinson feared me? 'No Thor you are scared I'll flip a switch and implode!'

'Yes, that too.' he did not lie and I think it made everything worse. Loki took one look at me and his face turned feral but I couldn't watch him begin to throw nasty words at Thor again as I pushed from the seat and stalked back toward the end of the ship as my breath hitched and I could not take control of the way in which my chest heaved.

'Did she tell you about Loki?' my stuttered breathing only made my words shake. I did not turn around to see Thor's expression.

'What about Loki?' he hissed as if he thought I was changing the direction of the conversation.

'Nothing.' I uttered as I pressed my hands to my chest and tried to level my shaking breath.

'Eva, please understand that I had no intention of bringing you into my world once I found out but when I saw mother and she told me what was to become of you - my daughter -I knew I had to save you.'

I whirled on Thor and even Loki was staring at me with wide eyes expecting me to break apart in a fit of rage. 'Save me? From what?'

'Eva,' Thor's voice boomed in warning, 'Calm down.'

'Why do you think I'll turn on you, I'll get hysterical and bring about the end of the fucking world!' my voice was pitching towards a scream and my eyes bore down onto my father's. I would not back down, I needed answers.

'Enough!' the ship did not shake at his words but the outside sky did and splintered into a mosaic of blue and white light.

'I have not had enough!' I screamed as I started toward him, 'I want to know what she told you. What I'm meant to become.'

'Djǫfull.' Thor spat out the word as I neared him and I stopped in my tracks.

'Devil?' Loki's voice was a soft whisper, his shoulders dropped as he sounded the word out again.

'A child born of both Asgard and Midgard. A fallen warrior cast out by his father,' he pointed to himself, 'will impregnate a human female. The child will rise to power and bring about the end of the world.'

'Your world has interpretations of its own.' Loki guided me to my own understanding, though his gaze would not meet my own. My mind whirled as I already knew the story, and had heard different renditions of it over the years.

'Antichrist?' I blanched, 'I'm the fucking Norse equivalent of the antichrist?'

Chapter Text

'You will bring war, ruin and death. Your arrival to a fallen kingdom will come at the end of a Great War.' Thor's words echoed around the ship and my body trembled, I felt as if I might implode but despite all the insults I wished to throw at Thor and all the screams scratching at my throat, I could say nothing. I could do nothing.

'Enough, Thor.' Loki warned.

He didn't, I could do nothing but stare at my father as he continued to speak about what was to become of me, 'You will break apart the sky with the tools of your father. You will prosper and thrive should you bury those of us who stand in your way.'

Loki turned to me, blue eyes pitiful as they bore into mine, 'Prophecies are the currency of the dead, don't listen to him.' His words did little to settle the roar of my mind.

'You believe mother to be a liar, dear brother?' Thor asked as he stepped toward Loki and then reached for me, his eyes also full of pity, 'Do you believe it to be a lie Eva?'

Loki placed himself between Thor and me, hands pressed against my waist as he kept his back to Thor and spoke softly to me. Could he tell I was about to lose it, that I was going in on myself?

It felt the same as when I found out that my family wasn't coming back. The body shakes, thick tongue heavy with unspoken words and shallow breaths. My mind was a black hole and all I had wanted to do was close my eyes and sink into it. Let that darkness take me over, allow myself the freedom of falling.

'You are not bad, Eva. You are not Djǫfull.'

My eyes shuttered closed and I felt myself drowning in the blackness of my own thoughts. The heaviness was all that I had known once and how easy it was to give into it.

Loki's grip on my waist tightened, his voice soft and filled with an urgency I had never heard from him, his words quick, a warmth spreading through me from his touch,

'Eva darling, I promise you that I won't let that happen. You won't ever realise that power.'

And what a fucking lie that was. His only reason for saying those words was to talk me down from the edge, he didn't want me to be powerful - didn't want his own power to be lessened because of mine. Was he afraid of what I might become like Thor was?

Loki had never wanted me to come into power in the first place. I opened my eyes to be met with Loki's own and though I attempted to shift away and have Loki stop touching me he didn't let me go. I had to peer over his shoulder at Thor whose face was set in a deep frown.

'How do I stop it?' my voice trembled, was I even sure I could? But I also knew I wouldn't burn down the fucking world, not that I didn't have it in me, but really what would I gain from doing so? Maybe my power was not mine, maybe I didn't come into it as suggested, maybe it was a type of curse?

'You don't.' Thor swallowed, 'The Thrice Prince will.'

'Who is that?' Both Loki and I said in unison, Loki shifted to face Thor but still his grip on my waist like iron, the warmth turning to a chill as I looked down at the bare skin of his hands and wrists to find they had turned blue and lined with curved markings, revealing his true heritage.

Thor's eyes meandered between the both of us and caught Loki's hands against my waist and his lips twitched as if he might ask why my uncle was touching me so intimately, why his skin was turning blue or why he had suddenly become so fond of me, so protective. Thor didn't, he pressed his lips together and turned from us with a twitching eye, stalking back to the cockpit, hands on his hips as he gazed out at the night sky before us.

The small moment was strange like Thor had been caught interrupting something, not like we had been the ones doing something wrong. I placed a small distance between Loki and me. Had Thor found Loki's sudden concern for me as confusing as I had? Had he assumed that there was something going on between us but was too embarrassed to address it?

'I don't know.' Thor answered our question. Loki emanated a strange sound from the back of his throat and folded his arms over his chest, I took notice of how he tried to hide his hands, slowly fading back to their normal shade.

'One day you will take up the throne. As the Queen of New Asgard or as the prophesied Djǫfull. It was never mentioned what his role in all of this is, only that he'll stop you.' Thor still didn't turn as he spoke, I couldn't make out what his expression was and it only added to the fear spreading through my body.

Did he really believe in my fate? Of what I might become or was he just pained that he even had to tell me this? I wasn't sure whether I was thankful for it or not. He was willing to be honest with me, with no lies or secrets or manipulations. He was doing his best - for him anyway. I had a dad, I had someone raise me and now that was not Thor's job, maybe he knew that all along, maybe it was why he had been absent, reluctant to reveal himself and the truth to me - easier to be a father when all he had to do was claim the title and not put in any of the work.

'Fucking great.' I breathed and sank back into my seat. Thor exhaled deeply and over his shoulder peered at me through narrowed eyes, I couldn't help myself as I offered him a tight smile to ease both his and my own anxieties. I wasn't imploding or burning down the world today.

The rest of the trip was silent. Thor dozed off in the captain's seat and Loki perched on the edge of his seat opposite mine as if as soon as the ship landed he would be gone. I didn't blame him, everything that had transpired that night, the past twenty-four hours was a whirlwind. Though I supposed he had a better grasp on all of it than I had what with his centuries of coping with outrageous and surreal events. It was probably a normal week for him.

In the quiet, I found my eyes drawn to Loki's hands folded before him. Long slim fingers curled around one another, thin veins visible underneath his soft skin - no sign of what lie beneath. I had only seen parts of him revealed as his jötunn self, his crimson eyes and pale blue skin. It was haunting really that beneath the skin he wore there was another version of himself, cold-blooded and feral.

Loki saw it as a weakness, I had gathered such when Thor had briefly discussed his adopted-brothers heritage. Already Loki was other to Thor, had been second best to the Crown Prince his entire life and when Odin had revealed to Loki that he was born of Jötunheim - was not of true Asgardian blood and had no claim to the throne - it had embarrassed him.

Funny how he had tried to make me ashamed of what I was when I had first arrived in New Asgard. My thoughts were conveyed out loud as I huffed out a disbelieving breath.

'Are you alright?' Loki whispered.

'I'm coping despite the circumstances.' I tore my gaze from his hands and offered him an awkward smile which did nothing really besides convey how terrified I was inside. Hardly coping.

Loki' tongue ran over his teeth. I shifted in my seat and checked on Thor to see if he was awake but his breathing was slowed and his legs were limp before him as he slumped in his seat.

'You're meant to be the one who saves me you know.'

'I won't be.' he wiped his hands on his pants and pulled his eyebrows together. I could only watch him, wait for a reaction from him, anger or mock or mischief. The sombre air in the ship and the hush of our voices had given me some confidence that at that moment I might have discovered more about him.

'Who was she?' I had been wondering for a while now, about the woman he loved. Or still did. The person who still consumed his thoughts. He had laid the truth before me in that cell in the Compound. He had almost admitted it, who he should have been with, someone else, not me. I could still remember that look in his eyes. Pain and anger and loss. It made me jealous, it made me realise how little I meant to him - how inconsequential any feelings I would have for him would be because I wasn't her.

'I've no idea what you're talking about.' Loki threw me a dark look and slumped back in his own seat folding his hands under his arms.

I shouldn't have been thinking out loud. Not with Thor so close and possibly feigning sleep but Loki didn't seem too concerned. I almost wanted to get caught, I wanted to tell someone about what Loki and I had been playing at. I wouldn't have even minded the disgusted looks I would have gotten. Maybe I just wanted to put it into words and out into the universe, maybe it would have made it feel more real and less like a fever dream.

'It's why you won't talk about where you've been all these years, isn't it? She was with you.'

'You've no idea what you're talking about Evangeline.' he snapped at me, his voice sharp and pointed. It was a defense mechanism I was all too familiar with.

'You loved her.'

'She died so what was the point of it anyway?'

'Did there have to be a point?'

He didn't answer me but I saw the way his jaw clenched, how his eyes dropped to the floor and focused in on one spot. He was thinking of her then I knew it and it gnawed at me. I had to know more. Anything he would give me. Not to know about her but about him, to see what type of person he would have loved, how they had gotten to be so privileged.

'What was her name?' I asked and to my shock Loki answered, eyes still focused on the floor before him.

'Her name was Sylvie.'

Pretty. Mysterious. Fun. She probably would have been fun, would have made him laugh. My heart squeezed as I lowered my own gaze from him and folded my own hands in my lap.

Now who was playing games Evangeline? I thought to myself. What the hell had I hoped to gain? I was growing jealous over a dead woman and only dredging up Loki's past.

'I'm sorry. I'm sorry, you didn't deserve that.'

'Thank you.' his voice was barely audible. Who knew what I was apologising for? The conversation, his grief, my prying? All of it.

'It doesn't matter what Frigga said you were right it's not meant to be me.' The ship was growing cold, the sky outside was clear, a dark canvas of navy dotted with silver stars. No more thunder or lightning.

'Do you truly mean that Eva?' Loki's head fell back against the headrest and I knew he was staring at me but I couldn't bring myself to look in his eyes.

I couldn't bring myself to see sadness or grief in them or remnants of love - for a different woman. Frigga's words rang out in my mind again. I would love him even if it pained me and I knew with every part of my being I was falling for him.

And fuck did it hurt. His ravaged immortal heart belonged to someone else. Sylvie. Loki was not mine.

'I can't manipulate people into loving me.' I shrugged, clasping my hands together tightly.

'I'm not quite sure what you wish for me to say.' His voice was softer, gentler as if he didn't wish to see me upset and I kept my gaze downward because I felt tears well in my eyes and if I had looked up at him in that moment I would have seen his pity and it would have hurt worse than his rejections.

I'd been humiliated enough. I had humiliated myself enough.

'Nothing. You don't need to say anything. You've said enough.'

We didn't speak for the rest of the journey but I felt his eyes wander over to me every now and again and I fought the urge to look at him and tell him everything on my mind. Instead I sat back in my seat and closed my eyes and imagined telling him everything I had wanted to but was too afraid too.

I think I may have already been falling for you.

I think that was the whole point, I was meant to love you and you weren't ever meant to love me but it doesn't mean I won't stop thinking of what it might have been like.

I wish I was yours.

And maybe it was a wonderful dream, maybe I was so caught up in my own childish fantasies but I swore I felt a tug on my mind and Loki's own voice echo there,

How desperately I wish I wasn't already ruined for you.

Chapter Text

In the deep belly of the New Asgard palace, I faced the man my father had accidentally locked up in a cell. He was not happy to see me. Though Kit's pretty eyes flashed with amusement when they fell on Loki behind me in his own cell being taunted by Thor.

'Honestly?' Loki hissed, slamming a fist against the force field which stood between him and Thor grinning at him from the other side. I could only watch the interaction with my own amusement - both centuries-old gods acting like bickering little boys.

'Be thankful I didn't have your head for that act you pulled at the Compound. And don't think I didn't know about the body in the Vault.' Thor's voice boomed along the wide, empty corridor of the dungeon as he stalked away to supposedly go and fix mine and Loki's mess.

Loki rolled his eyes and feigned ignorance, 'I've got no idea what you're talking about.' He called after his brother and I was grateful that Loki gave hardly any information to Thor other than the little white lie that the men had attempted to assassinate me.

'Have a think about it while you're down here then brother.' Thor shot back over his shoulder, his hands clenched into fists at his sides and then he disappeared up the stairs.

I faced Kit, stepping up onto the ledge before his cell. He looked worse for wear, his hair was unruly and a mess of brown curls streaked with grey, his neat beard was scruffy and longer and he wore the same denim outfit from that night on the beach - though his shirt was unbuttoned halfway so I could glimpse the top of his chest dusted with hair.

I stopped myself from wondering why I found his rugged appearance so attractive and how he still managed to look put-together after three weeks in a cell.

'I'll start with a simple "I'm sorry." and we can go from there?' I said.

He blinked his pretty eyes at me and I didn't realise how tense I was, anticipating a nasty answer due to his current circumstances until he exhaled and shrugged at me,

'I mean I really want to harp on about how I saved your life and I had an entire speech practised about how angry I was about being thrown down here. But then I realised you definitely owe me a second date.'

He grinned at me, cerulean eyes moving over my face and lower, hovering on my lips as his bottom lip flicked out to trace his own bottom one and then sweeping down the length of my neck in a heavy-lidded gaze. But his eyes ventured no lower than my breasts and fuck did it make me feel exquisite to be looked at with such intrigue and longing without any type of fear that it meant anything other than I was wanted.

'We never had a first date.' I told him, clearing my throat.

'Now you owe me two.' His words were spoken quietly, in a voice that made me feel small and delicate and I almost giggled had it not been for Loki's audible groan behind me.

Kit tilted his head to the side to get a better look at Loki behind me, he cocked a brow at him, his words kind but his tone nothing but condescending,

'I'm sorry we haven't met, I'm Kit, Eva's friend. And you are?'

'Loki Laufeyson, Prince of New Asgard. God of Mischief. Evangeline's charge. Be sure to address me correctly next time.' Loki snapped from behind me, his emphasis on his titles only had me rolling my eyes, especially the latter but I wasn't too willing to get into a domestic with him over it. Not when he was so close to throwing a tantrum. I knew if it wasn't for the force fields holding both men inside their cells Loki would have wrung Kit's neck.

'My apologies. I just assumed because you were on that side of the wall that you were the bad guy?' Kit shrugged and I willed myself not to turn and see the look on Loki's face, though I knew it would bring me so much satisfaction to see him riled up.

'As opposed to you?' Loki's voice was stone cold and I felt the chill of his words spread out of his cell and up my back as I shivered.

Kit shrugged and winked at me, a faint smile playing on his lips which had my own quirking.

'Your uncle, Eva?' Kit folded his hands behind his back and his eyes crinkled, the purely human way in which he showed his emotions made me relax, made me feel a calm I hadn't in days. He was not hiding his feelings, there was no angst, no manipulation or hidden agenda. He was simply being kind, and playful. Shit, he was flirting. I felt my stomach do a stupid little flip and allowed the flush on my cheeks to bloom.

'No blood relation.' I told Kit and shifted closer to him, stopping just before the shimmering wall between us, 'I should probably get you out of here, he tends to talk to himself a lot and he's an incessant whinger.'

'Hey!' Loki snapped and I turned to laugh at him to find him shaking his head at me annoyed. As he began to pace his cell I saw him lick his lips and fight back a smile.

'See he's a complainer.' I offered Kit as I turned back to him and glimpsed his own gaze on Loki for a brief second - watching the god in his cell as if he was picking him apart - scrutinising Loki's reaction to me, the faint smile tugging at the corners of Loki's lips. But just as quickly Kit's attention was diverted back to me and the small little lines which pulled between his brows disappeared.

Really he was probably just cautious of what Loki might do should he free himself from his cell. Kit was probably judging how far he could go with his insults before Loki threatened his life.

'Could we talk?' Kit tilted his head.

'Aren't you already doing that?' Loki said from behind us, he shouldn't have heard Kit's words from so far away but I didn't put it past Loki to be honing his attention in on us. It seemed Loki didn't understand privacy.

'Privately?' Kit added as if reading my mind. He stepped to the side so I could step inside his cell, he kept his hands behind his back and kept his distance as I stepped forward and behind me, Loki's voice warned,

'Evangeline, don't you dare.'

Choosing to ignore Loki's demand, I swivelled slightly and bent to gather the long train of my gown in a half-curtsey. Through my lashes I glimpsed at Loki whose jaw was clenched shut, brows drawn low and even from far away I could see the crimson which bled from his pupils, replacing the blue. He moved before me with a flick of his hand conjuring up a green velvet chaise and almost throwing himself down on it.

As I straightened slowly I caught Kit's befuddled look, I had imagined he might be peering at my breasts in the low cut of my gown but instead they were focused upon the golden circlet resting atop my head. Then before I could begin to think I was wrong, his attraction to me was something I had conjured up in my own mind - fantasised about -his eyes dropped for a moment to take in the low sweep of my gown and the swell of my breasts which were exposed.

Maybe it was his heated look or the way in which he sucked on his bottom lip but I shifted forward, through the force field, the pressure of it pulling me inside the cell, closer to Kit.

There wasn't much to the large space but Kit was courteous and quick to hide his gawking as he sat on a small but plush cot on the far left wall, his hands running up and down his thighs like he was nervous. Of my title, was that why his eyes kept being pulled to the pretty thing on my head? Or just in a general sense like he had feelings for me and didn't know how to act around me?

Shit. I hoped it was the latter. I had to keep myself from smiling like an adolescent girl and try to slow my breathing.

Kit's eyes flitted across the space to where Loki was laid in his cell and I thought I might have been met with a furious gaze from my uncle but Loki's eyes were closed, his arms folded behind his head, legs crossed at the ankles as it seemed he was done with watching the two of us. He would no doubt still be listening in on our conversation. Odd, one would have thought privacy would have been a given in a palace this side. Seemingly not.

I refused to let Loki be a part of this conversation, to have a say in my relationship - or friendship, I wasn't sure - with Kit. In that cell just with Kit, my nerves were calmed, there was no threat of turning into the blasphemous beast I was prophesied to become. Things between Kit and I had remained somewhat simple. Minus me disappearing into a cave and showing up three weeks later to find him imprisoned for supposedly kidnapping me.

'Is he like, your chaperone?' Kit's brows pulled together and his lips pressed in a thin line, it looked like he might start laughing but was holding it back based upon my answer.

'No.' I told Kit with a deep sigh and he let loose a soft chuckle which eased some of the tension and I sunk onto the cot next to him, placing him between Loki and myself, my back sinking against the wall so my words would have been slightly muted from Loki.

'Thank you, for forgiving me. For being so receptive about all of this.' I gestured to the empty cell.

Kit chewed on his bottom lip and nodded but he didn't look at me like he had heard me, too deep in his thoughts. There was a lull in conversation but I didn't push Kit to speak and really it was nice just to sit in the presence of another human being and not be expected to be excellent or enrapturing or anything as equally out of my control or capabilities.

I watched Kit as he sat beside me. He felt real. Solid, like a real person with genuine feelings and emotions and no hidden agenda. There was a deep tiredness about him, the way in which his shoulders slumped forward, the grey circles under his eyes and painstakingly I realised I had been the one to put him there in that cell and guilt gnawed at my gut at his kindness, how easily he could forgive me.

And where had my mind been instead?

My eyes were drawn inexplicably to Loki lying in his own cell. Flawless, achingly beautiful and perfect. Everything I fucking desired and wanted and would never have. I knew the distance the both of us were putting between us wouldn't change anything. But I would try, to stick by my word for my own sake, Loki was not mine. I wouldn't force it anymore.

'Eva, are you alright?' Kit asked, dragging me from my own dangerous thoughts.

'I'm fine.' I said and he slumped back onto the wall beside me,

'Okay.'

'What, you don't believe me?'

'You're unravelling, Eva.'

'I'm not.' I was. My voice conveyed the truth and Kit's hand rested palm up on my thigh, it felt a little awkward placing my hand in his but comforting nonetheless. It made it easier that he wasn't looking at me, no pitiful look on his face or expectant gaze awaiting my breakdown.

Kit's voice was barely audible as he spoke, eyes on our hands clasped together, his thumb brushing over my skin in soothing strokes,

'What happened, that's not normal. The crash, the fire on the beach and then the cave and that man that tried to -'

'What man?' and in his cell, Loki sat up in one swift movement, his hands on the chaise white-knuckled with their grip.

'There was a man in the lighthouse the night Eva disappeared,' Kit turned to look at Loki who was leaning forward to listen intently to his words, Kit's free hand had settled upon my wrist, pressed against the skin firmly, holding me next to him. His touch felt reassuring. Safe.

Did I know I wasn't going to bring it up? Not that I really minded him talking about it. Amongst all other things, I had forgotten about that small detail. But now the memory flooded back and my free hand reached up to touch my neck.

'I caught him with his hands around the Princesses neck, I managed to get him off of her. He almost killed her.'

Kit's thumb pressed against my pulse point in a gentle caress and I hoped he couldn't feel how it thundered and worse how I tried to hide my racing pulse as I looked at Loki.

'You didn't tell me this Eva.'

'I-' I began but had no chance to explain and really had no words to.

'Did you kill him?' Loki asked.

Kit's thumb continued to caress my wrist, he winced at Loki's words, 'I'm not sure. I think I hit him pretty hard to knock him out but it was dark and I had to pull him off, Eva.'

Loki was silent as his chest heaved and his eyes honed in on me. I squirmed underneath that gaze and Loki's hands white-knuckled and pale beside him. Everything around me felt sharp, like the biting cold of an icy winter.

I felt myself grow small as Loki looked close to losing it. How angry was he that I hadn't told him every single detail about what had happened that night? What would my reprimand be? How would he use this new information against me?

I felt Kit look at me too, his thumb pressed against my wrist and his hand squeezed mine reassuringly as Loki sat back upon his chaise, his elbows resting, hands clasped together on his knees as they bounced. How pissed was he? I tried not to imagine it was anything else but anger or irritation. I had to remind myself that he was the God of Mischief and

'Eva.' Kit pushed.

'Don't ask me again if I'm alright. I don't have an answer.' I snatched back my hand, 'And don't look at me like that.'

'Have you talked to at least one person about it?' Kit asked, I said nothing. I sat on my hands to keep myself from touching my neck, the memory of the strangers touch on me making my stomach lurch.

'Do you even have one friend here?'

'I just, I don't -'

'Eva, I think -'

'Don't!' I stood abruptly and put some space between Kit and me, Loki's head snapped up and he half-rose from his seat but my scathing look had him sitting again. 'Don't think, don't assume anything about me. Just get out.'

My hands tightened around the skirt of my gown as if to stop myself from laying my hands on Kit, or rather to hide the fact that he was right, that I was unravelling and something inside of me was aching to be unleashed.

Kit stood but did not leave, his gaze sweeping over to Loki watching the two of us and back to me and I felt stripped bare at the way in which Kit looked at me. The cerulean of his eyes had darkened to navy as he stepped toward me, slowly, cautiously as he believed it himself I might erupt.

'I see.' he continued toward me and I willed myself to take soft and even breaths because he looked at me like he might devour me. I shouldn't have been so unsettled by the sight of him looking at me like that but his voice dropped and the sound of his words caressed my skin like a warm embrace,

'You don't want a friend, Eva.'

Loki stood as Kit touched me, his hand reaching out to tuck a stray lock of my hair behind my ear as he leant into me and my body was persistent in betraying me as Kit whispered in my ear,

'I've been in this cell for three weeks and my thoughts about you have been anything but gentlemanly. I'm so sorry Eva, for assuming, for thinking I could be a friend to you.'

His fingers caressed the line of my jaw and downward, lower, skimming across the racing pulse of my throat. I didn't dare swallow should he stop or think I was nervous. Kit's eyes dropped to my breasts and I felt my skin burn red hot with the sight of his tongue flicking out to lick his pink lips.

'I've never wanted to be your friend, Eva.' Kit took one more step toward me to close the distance between us and I loosened my grip on my skirt to reach up for him, my fingers curling around his biceps and I took pleasure in the feel of his muscle beneath my fingers.

His fingers stopped before reaching the plane between my breasts and I almost groaned at the loss of contact as his hand cupped my chin, thumb pressing against my bottom lip as he dazzled me with his smile,

'I want to be your fucking toy, Princess.'

I moaned at his words and the room exploded in the colour of emerald. Loki was in our cell before I could realise that he had broken out of his own, stalking toward the two of us and I had only a second to place myself between him and Kit at the flash of his daggers in his hands.

The air was heated around us but as I pressed my palms up against Loki to stop him from lunging at Kit he was ice cold, his heart hammering in his chest so hard I could feel it beat to my own pace.

'Loki,' I started but his attention was on Kit who had backed away but not surrendered, Loki pushed against me, nostrils flared and jaw set,

'I'll kill him.' it was a promise.

'Go on then,' Kit taunted and I almost turned to snarl at him myself for his audacity at challenging Loki. Instead, I pressed against Loki's chest as he tried to shove me away,

'You touched her.' Loki's words were cold and the air in the cell turned, growing as cold as he felt beneath my hands, 'And now I want you dead at my feet.'

'Is that what your dear niece would want?' Kit asked, I felt his presence behind me, hands snaking around my waist as he pulled me back toward him and if it wasn't for Loki's daggers in his hands or the murderous look on his face I might have thought the entire situation was a joke.

'Kit,' I groaned, my hands covering his own, his nose buried in my neck, he bit me softly and my body betrayed me pushing back against his own as he nipped at my skin with a soft groan. I felt myself growing wet between my thighs at his touch, I had to believe it wasn't in the way in which Loki was looking at me,

'Do you want me to stop?' Kit whispered in my ear, hands moving upward to rest underneath my breasts on my ribs, 'Tell your uncle, tell him you want me to stop. Let him kill me, Eva. I'm yours, I'll do anything you want Princess.'

Kit's words, the weight of him behind me, his warmth enveloping me and lips skimming my throat had me dizzy. No, I didn't want him to stop. And Jesus Christ hearing him tell me he was mine, to do with as I pleased like a toy, it had me soaking. Is this what it meant to be a goddess, to have power, to be eternal?

I gave in to it and the thrill of it, my body was all too happy to slink against Kit's and the look on Loki's face only added to the rush of it all.

'Go to my room,' I told Kit and he removed himself from me and brushed past Loki without a word who could only keep his gaze on me.

When Kit was gone, Loki spoke, daggers at his side disappearing,

'You enchanted him.'

'Did I?' I cocked a brow at him. Maybe I had but I liked the idea that Kit had wanted me. I wouldn't let Loki taunt me any longer. If Kit truly wanted to be my toy I would take him up on the opportunity. I had to release some of the tension growing inside of me somehow. Kit would do for now, why wasn't I allowed to have a little fun? If I was actively avoiding turning into the Norse Antichrist then I was going to have fun doing so. I would take what I wanted while I had the chance.

'He's an idiot.' Loki rolled his shoulders, 'And you're an idiot too for believing that facade of his.'

'I didn't ask your opinion Loki.' I shot back and folded my arms over my chest.

'Be glad I'm offering it. He shouldn't have touched you.'

'Why?' my curiosity got the best of me and it seemed Loki didn't think I would ask for an explanation as he straightened and his eyes flitted from my own to the floor.

'You're the heir to the Asgardian Throne'

It was a poor excuse and I shouldn't have hoped that he would have told me he was angry because it meant he felt something for me. I shouldn't have hoped it was jealousy either, it was maybe possession, not liking to share me, even if I was just a toy myself for Loki.

'You're acting hysterical over this mortal man.' he shook his head at me scornfully,

'You're the one who blew apart your cell because he touched me, you killed a squadron of men for doing less.' I shot back and started toward him, enjoying the way in which his eyes narrowed at me as I lifted my chin to him defiantly.

He shrugged nonchalantly, hands folded behind his back as he looked down at me, 'I like to put on a show.'

'Then drop the jealous boyfriend act.' I reached for him, my hand curling around his jacket. I shouldn't have touched him because his cold hand curled around my wrist to snatch my hand away from him.

'You've no idea what you're talking about.'

I looked to the pale blue of his skin, the thick ridges of veins which appeared as I felt the biting cold of it right down to my bone but my skin did not turn frostbitten 'Why doesn't it burn?'

Loki caught on to what I was asking and looked down to see his skin revealed, horrified he uncurcled his fingers from me.

'It's meant to hurt me.' I asked him, eyes glued to his hand which he held out before him shaking slightly as the pallor of his skin changed, rising up from the collar of his shirt to his face.

'Am I one of you?' I asked and I knew there was no truth to it but I had heard the stories of what a Frost Giant's touch did to people, Asgardians rather. Loki was immune to the cold because he had the blood of the Jötun in his veins. Why was I immune to his touch, was it something as simple as him only being a half-breed?

I edged a glance upwards to meet his eyes, still their usual shade of blue as he forced his skin to return to its usual shade. His brows furrowed and mouth slightly agape as if he were trying to find his words but couldn't,

'What am I to you?' my voice felt hoarse as I tried to swallow down the lump forming in my throat.

Fated. Intentional. Every single word that Frigga had spoken to me was a whirlpool in my mind and the words were so close to escaping my own mouth but Loki shifted away from me, his voice loud and pressing but I could hear the tremor in his voice,

'You have no idea what you're talking about Evangeline.'

'I'm your mate.' and I was so sure as I breathed the words. The word itself was strange and fantastical, only familiar from supernatural romance books I had binged - completely unrealistic.

But from the way in which Loki looked at me, I didn't doubt the truth of it; devastated and completely disgusted that I had spoken the words out loud.

Chapter Text

Loki's answer was one word, 'Yes.'

But the way in which his jaw set and he pressed his lips together, I could tell he was regretful from both the truth and the fact that he had answered me. His chin lifted defiantly, his hands folded behind his back as he distanced himself from me.

I couldn't make sense of it. Why him, why me? I shook my head, trying to beat back the pounding pain building at the back of my head and all the horrid and hurtful thoughts my mind dredged up. I spoke before Loki could, not allowing him the chance to reject me once more. My palms held out to him as I spoke, I tried to hide the tremble of my fingers but as Loki's eyes swept downward, I knew he noticed, I knew he saw my fear, my anxiety.

'Take it back. I don't want it. I don't want -'

'Me?' Loki cut me off, his voice hoarse, eyes blue pits of cold fire as he stared at me.

My own breath hitched, my brows drawing together as I shook my head at him again, reaching up to press my fingers against my throbbing skull, 'False hope for eternity. I cannot live only to be completely unloved and unseen by you. Take it back Loki.'

There was a flicker of something in Loki's blue eyes, a vulnerability I had only glimpsed for small moments before and as quick as it appeared it was gone again. I shouldn't have been so honest with him, about wanting him and wanting to be loved by him, it made me vulnerable and weak - two things Loki as God of Mischief could use to his advantage.

He took two steps toward me and hesitated to take anymore as I sucked in a sharp breath, my hands dropped from my head by my side, itching to reach for him. Wanting him to take it back, reject me, the bond and whatever cruel fate brought us together. He had power and magic, the blood in his veins was enough surely to erase the bond.

Softly, Loki spoke, 'I can't.'

I swallowed, my head aching, 'What do you mean you can't, of course you can. You're a God.'

Loki's gaze did not waver from mine as he leant in toward me, his voice was clear and cutting with his words,

'I will belong to you until death.'

My breath shuddered, I could not tear my gaze away from him as I felt the weight of the truth upon my chest, 'So you can't stop it, you don't deny it, the bond?'

'I deny you.' and his words were final. His jaw clenched as he lifted his chin, making it crystal clear that he had known the truth much longer than I had and come to terms with it swiftly. Without a second thought.

I knew it was because of this woman he had loved and lost.

Sylvie.

Someone who ceased to exist except in his own mind, I could never measure up to her, I couldn't be her. And it was unsettling how badly I was beginning to wonder more about how to know her and how she was so that I could begin to understand how Loki loved her. Her and only her. If I could shape myself into someone like her, someone he would want.

I had to step away from him, to put a physical distance between my own thoughts about him also. Kit was right. I was unravelling and it was dangerous. I was becoming obsessed with him, with needing his approval and really how far would I go to mould myself into what he needed?

My heart squeezed in anger for the entire situation, for allowing myself to get caught up in the fantasy of it all. I had always wanted love, a partner, and someone to share my life with but I didn't deserve this. Fuck, my need to be consumed by Loki was vicious and maddening.

I had half the mind to flee from the cell but I knew I had too many questions left unanswered and the moment I left I knew I would never get a chance to ask them again. I had him where I needed him. I had myself where I wanted to be, I actually had the nerve to stay put though my eyes flickered briefly past Loki and to the exit.

'How long have you known?' My voice was a whisper and I could not drag my eyes up to face Loki, 'That I am your mate, that we are mates?'

Loki shifted and he didn't answer me for so long that I assumed he wasn't going to until I was forced to look at him and the scowl on his face. His expression pinched.

'I was blinded by rage, fits of it. I didn't think it was anything but jealousy, anger at you appearing and trying to usurp me and get in between Thor and I. I didn't allow myself to believe it to be anything more until you disappeared.'

'Did you feel something?'

'Grief.' his eyes flickered toward me, 'Much like when -'

He stopped himself, he didn't have to say her name for me to understand. But despite it all, his rejection of me there was a warmth spreading through my chest at knowing he had grieved me, felt enough about me to miss me, for my absence to hurt. But it was not enough, I had to remind myself of this. I was not what he wanted.

'Would it have been so terrible? You and I?' and I feared his answer as I looked up at him, my hands at my sides continued to tremble, I forced myself to keep my gaze levelled at him and he closed his eyes with an exhaled breath, his chin dropping,

'No.'

I couldn't hold back the sharp intake of breath at his answer, my mind taunting itself with happy memories of the two of us together, a small smile played upon my lips but disappeared just as quickly as Loki opened his eyes and stepped toward me closing the distance between us as his hands gently grasped my face,

'You deserve more than to be half-loved by me.'

'Bullshit.' I said, recognising the lie in his eyes, how he was fighting himself and our own fucking destiny, the path that had been carved for the two of us before we had even met.

'I am protecting you, Evangeline.' he pulled himself closer to me, his hands on my face caressing my skin and my own hands reached up to touch his own,

'Please, don't.' my words were broken, my breath shuddering as I fought back the sobs rising in my chest and the hot burn of tears I was holding back, my hands tore away Loki's own from my face.

'I never had a fucking choice in this,' I gestured between us, my hand pressed against his chest where I could feel the steady rhythm of his heart beating, my hand curled around his jacket as I spoke, my voice rising higher along with the anger which was coursing like black tar through my veins,

'Did I lose every single fucking person I love just for you? Did you lose her for me? Just for you to tell me no, for you to make the decision for me about my own fucking future. Don't you dare tell me Loki that you are protecting me, you are protecting yourself from me. As you fucking should.' I shoved him away and stalked away from him, my tears loosened and left trails down my face as I could no longer hold back the sobs in my throat.

I gestured to myself and through my blurred vision I could see Loki's shock as I let loose my harsh words, 'I would have ruined myself for you. I would have been the villain for you. I would have protected you Loki.'

Loki could only stare at me as I allowed myself to sob, to cry out my pain and I could not stop myself as I felt my entire body shake, my breath came in and out in harsh rasps and I swiped fiercely at the tears marring my vision, Loki opened and closed his mouth as if he might have said something but he kept quiet, his hands lifted before him like he was hesitating to touch me.

'I have to leave. I have to get out of here.' I started to leave, stalking past Loki but he stepped to the side, his body blocking the exit. I tried to shove him aside but he did not shift and instead I smacked my palms against him. His frown deepened as he looked down at me.

'What, do you have something else you'd like to say to me? Some other way to remind me I am not enough, that I don't belong?'

Loki shook his head slightly, his face softening, his tone was a caress, 'Eva, you need to calm down.'

'Why?' I asked him, my hands thrown up in the air. I stood back to face him, my chin lifted defiantly as I blinked rapidly to free my eyes of more tears, 'Isn't this what you wanted, what Thor wanted? To have me leave, to realise I don't belong here. That you are not my family.'

'Evangeline,' Loki uttered my name as a warning.

'I had a life, people I loved, people who loved me and now I have you and I am not allowed to love you and I am meant to spend the rest of my life trying to fight it? I would have fixed you if it meant destroying myself and you would have let me. So let me go.'

My chest heaved and I could only stare up at Loki as his shoulders dropped, all of his defences gone as his eyes wavered with his own tears,

'Would you have loved me?' Loki uttered, his voice breaking at the words.

I swallowed, 'I already fucking do.'

And then Loki was closing the space between us, his hands grasping my face as he kissed me and it was desperate and angry as he pressed his lips against mine hard, his tongue forcing itself into my mouth and when I tasted him the two of us groaned. Loki pressed forward so that I stumbled backward, my back hitting the wall of the cell.

I allowed him to kiss me for a moment more, we shared each other's breaths and I could feel our hearts hammering in unison, his body suffocating me as he pressed into me and I could feel the warmth of him, his body solid against mine and so real. Loki pulled back, his forehead resting against mine as we caught our breaths. My body yearned for his, I wanted him to undress me, to claim me, even if it meant nothing to him, even if he would regret it later.

'Tell me you love me.' he said and his lips skimmed my own gently, I closed my eyes and revelled in his touch, knowing it would be temporary, trying to hold off telling him the words before he left me again, rejected me again.

With no answer, Loki kissed me again, one of his hands shifted to press against my waist as the other snaked around my throat like he might force the words from me. My own hands shifted to press against his chest as I shoved him fiercely once but he did not budge as he continued to kiss me, dragging my body against his as he lowered the two of us to our knees, not breaking the kiss once.

When I could catch my breath, Loki's lips skimmed down my throat, pinching my skin in small bites, nuzzling into me with his nose as he inhaled me. My eyes rolled back at the sensation of it, at hearing him groan from touching me. I wondered what it might have been like when he had touched Sylvie, if he wished I was her. I tried to fight away the thoughts as Loki laid me down on my back, his knees nudging apart my thighs as he reached down to lift my skirts and lay his bare hands on my thighs, dragging me toward him so that he could place himself between my legs.

As Loki's hands moved down my chest, over my ribs and lower to my stomach and then I jerked upright so quickly that his head lifted, his eyes widened in shock that he had done something wrong,

'Don't touch me. I can't have you touching me.' I shoved his hands away from my stomach and the thought of baring myself to him like that, all of me, made the situation so real. I could be nothing that he wanted, I was frightened of him seeing me naked, what if the mating bond was what made him want to fuck me? What if it was only a desire, not a personal need?

Loki must have sensed my nerves and shook his head, his fingers reaching out to lift my chin so that I could meet his heated gaze,

'I thought this is what you wanted? I thought you wanted me?' and white-hot rage flooded through my body because they were not the words of comfort I had expected him to bring me, instead I felt like his puppet, if anyone would grow to regret what was happening it would be me. Loki was doing me a favour, trying to rid himself of me.

'I thought you wanted Sylvie?' I spat back at him and he sat back on his haunches as his hands dropped to my thighs and squeezed hard,

'Take her name out of your mouth.' Loki's words were venomous but I did not flinch at the threat, not when I could see how his pants were tented with his erection, not when his eyes still bled crimson for me. But how real was his attraction for me really? It was chemical make-up, his body's reaction to my own for the sake of breeding. There was no emotion to it, it was purely physical.

'Be glad she's already fucking dead, I would have liked to have done it myself.'

Loki let loose a growl at my words as he dug his fingers into my thighs and pulled me toward him swiftly so that I lay flat on my back, my head hitting the ground harshly and at my wince of pain Loki grimaced,

'Take it back.' he told me as he lowered himself over me and I could not help myself as I lifted my hips to greet his erection pressed against my pussy.

'No.' I blinked at him.

'I said take it back.' Loki reached to grab a fistful of hair at my scalp and he pulled but it did little but let a small moan escape my mouth and my pussy flooded with wet heat. My eyes narrowed as I took him in and I could only shake my head before Loki descended down upon me, his hand still pulling on my hair as he kissed me, his other hand moving down to cup my ass as he lifted my hips to press against him.

He was not gentle as he pulled my bottom lip between his teeth and bit so hard he drew blood. Between harsh kisses - his tongue dancing with my own and leaving the taste of my own blood in my mouth - Loki demanded I apologise. I told him no and then the hand that was in my hair was pulling up my skirts as his fingers skimmed across the line of my underwear to yank them aside.

I tried to sit up as Loki pulled back and began to unzip his pants but with one look up at me, his hand jerked forward to press me back down onto the floor, his other hand in my hair pulling gently, the sensation was delicious as his fingers massaged my scalp slightly.

'Don't.' He warned and his eyes were drawn to his fingers splayed upon my stomach, 'I'm already fighting the urge to breed you.'

I couldn't fight back the moan that escaped my lips at his words and the image of him in my mind fucking me raw, filling me up with his cum. I had to control every part of my body so as not to move, not to stop him from doing what he was about to do.

Loki let out a deep sigh as his eyes closed tightly, his hand on my stomach going back to working on his zipper and the anticipation was too much, watching him before me, unsheathing himself had my mouth watering. His black hair was mussed and my fingers itched to grasp onto it and pull, my mouth ached to devour his own, I had to taste his moans as he filled me.

But then Loki was frozen, his eyes opening and landing on me horrified, his pupils dilated as his mouth opened to let out a soft breath and then he was glancing over his left shoulder.

'What?' I asked and lifted myself up onto my hands to peer over him. Thor stood outside the cell, his brows pulled down low, a scowl on his mouth as his blue eyes dragged over Loki and me - turning white and luminescent as the air crackled around us with his power. My heart dropped into my stomach and horrified I swallowed down the sick rising in my throat.

'It isn't what it looks like.' Loki laughed but around us the palace shook with thunder as Thor stepped forward, a rush of air brushed over him and ruffled his long blonde hair as Stormbreaker appeared in his hand,

'It looks like you are mounting my daughter.' Thor hissed, his voice echoing all around us, almost as if the palace itself was speaking.

Loki could not fight back his grin as he looked at me laid out before him, my face heated in embarrassment. I could not bring myself to look at Thor and instead watched as Loki shrugged. I knew too late that Loki was finding the situation humorous and would offer Thor an equally outrageous answer only if to ruffle his brother and create drama. He knew as much as I did Thor wouldn't actually kill him, maybe maim him for my sake.

'Well, it is better than the alternative.' Loki offered.

'Which is what?' Thor asked.

'At least your darling daughter isn't mounting me.' Loki laughed and I gasped as Stormbreaker was thrown towards Loki's head.

Chapter Text

My hand shot up to call Stormbreaker toward me and as I grasped onto the axe's handle, it threw me back with the weight. Loki had only just managed to duck out of the way, his head dropped between his shoulders as he let out a shout.

Stormbreaker crackled with power in my hand and Thor stalked toward the two of us. Loki was quick to his feet, turning to face his brother with a playful grin, his hands held out before him in surrender,

'Don't get hysterical Thor!'

I scrambled to my feet, heaving Stormbreaker with me in a tightened fist hoping Thor wouldn't snatch it back and Thor let out an agitated shout at Loki's words as his eyes blazed bright blue with his powers, lightning crackling around his fingertips as he stalked toward Loki.

'I knew you always wanted the throne, but this is beyond what I ever imagined you might do! You make me sick!' Thor's voice had me near trembling in fear as the air around us went static, every hair on my body rising with the deep timbre of his voice. Around us, lightning struck at the walls. and Thor thrust his arm forward, grasping Loki by the throat and lifting him into the air.

Loki let out a strangled breath and his hands clawed at Thor's around his neck. I let out a cry of surprise at the sight of Thor choking the breath from Loki's body and I couldn't deny that every single fibre of my being wanted to wretch Thor's hands from Loki, something inside of me pulsed and I had to ignore the dark sensation wanting to be unleashed.

'I enchanted him!' I shouted at Thor, a lie but the only viable one I could think of, 'He was taunting me about my lack of powers and I had to do something.'

'I don't believe you.' Thor shot back and squeezed Loki's neck harder. Loki did not fight back and my palms sweated so much that I had to adjust my grip on Stormbreaker. Loki let out a choked sound and his face began to discolour, yet Thor did not stop, he did not waver and still, his eyes burnt bright. The dark thing inside me pushed against my skin like my anger was coming alive and wanting to escape my body. If it wasn't for my fear of hurting Thor or Loki I would have unleashed it.

'What that looked like was not enchantment, I smelt him and his -' Thor could not finish his sentence, a shiver ran through him as he grimaced at the memory of what had just transpired and dropped Loki at his feet with a disgusted groan. Loki's hands snaked up to rub at his already bruised neck, slightly burnt from Thor's lightning. I didn't dare fall to my feet to see if he was okay. It would have destroyed the lie, it might have made Thor more enraged.

With a shuddered breath, I straightened my spine and tightened my grip around Stormbreaker, readying myself for the vile lies I was about to spew all to cover up what had just happened, all to stop Loki from being the villain. Though even my gut twisted knowing he might believe them, that he might hate me for them. But at least they would save him from Thor.

Thor looked at me awaiting such an explanation, his eyes had returned to their natural state yet the lightning at his fingers still crackled.

'Loki is not my family and you should stop believing he is yours. He is a wound, a festering fucking wound in this family and the best thing he ever did for you was die.'

As soon as the words came out of my mouth I felt vile, my tongue felt like tar and I did everything in my power not to look at Loki sprawled at mine and Thor's feet. I had to swallow back my apologies as I stepped toward Thor and raised my chin, allowing that thing inside of me to breathe, to temporarily free itself.

Instinctively, Thor's own powers greeted it. His threads of lightning reaching for the shifting magenta threads of my own power reaching for his and it must have been my fear of the thing coming out of me but I jerked back as my threads of power consumed Thor's own and he was brought to his knees.

Stormbreaker in my hand felt weightless, I almost had the urge to lift the axe and swing. Instead, I dropped the axe and it fell to the floor, the weight of it dropping on the floor reverberated up my legs.

'I'm sorry!' I gasped but my own power wrapped around Thor and squeezed and he let out a groan of pain, his blue eyes lifted to greet my own, he was concerned for what was happening but I saw him fight his own fear - for my own sake as not to scare me.

Loki who had remained still on the floor shifted up onto his knees and uttered my name. I gritted my teeth and didn't dare look at him should everything fall apart, should my hold on Thor squeeze tighter and hurt him further or worse, kill him.

My breath came in short rasps as I kept my focus upon Thor and willed the magenta threads of power encasing him to loosen or disappear but I had no idea what was happening, how to control it even as I tried to will it back inside of myself. I was not in control.

'Eva, you need to let me go.' Thor's voice was soft but still edged with a threat. Did he think he would have to hurt me? Why couldn't he break free?

'I can't.' I told him and shifted further back into the cell until my back hit the far wall. My power pulsed and I hid my hands behind my back but even that did nothing to help.

I closed my eyes and took in deep breaths, I counted to ten and opened my eyes to find Thor still where he was moments before, this time a thin sheen of sweat had broken out on his forehead. He rolled his shoulders in an attempt to free himself.

His own power pulsated around the cell but it was only a dull hum of static. I looked to Loki then, his eyes were widened and full of sympathy but I didn't want it and my hands curled into fists behind me. Thor groaned again and Loki pushed himself to his feet and started for me.

'You're going to hurt him, Evangeline.' His voice took on a deep rasp and my skin prickled with goosebumps. The pink threads of power holding Thor in place began to loosen.

'Tell him I enchanted you.' I told Loki, noticing the wary look upon Thor's face, not having any doubt that the moment I freed Thor he would be upon Loki.

Loki couldn't understand my reasoning and his eyebrows knit together, his lips opened as if he might speak the words but instead he clasped his mouth shut, his own power reached for me, emerald green light wrapping around me in a gentle caress. My body slumped slightly as he pressed toward me, the threads of my power disappearing into nothing. Like a rubber band snapping, I felt my power coil back inside me and writhe under my skin, I lifted my hands before me to glimpse the magenta threads shift under my skin like a living thing.

Loki, seemingly pleased that I no longer had Thor in my grasp, glanced over his shoulder and addressed his brother,

'Continue to assume the worst of me brother, you'll never be disappointed in me then.'

And Loki was gone in a flash of green light.

Thor blinked at me, taking in Loki's words, the truth of the situation, his eyes meandering down to Stormbreaker on the floor. I knew he was fighting back the truth but I had hoped he was naive enough to go with my lie, even for his own sake as not to have his idea of me as his only daughter tarnished with the image of his brother fucking me. He would blame himself for the act, he would think he drove us to it out of hatred, so before he could speak I added,

'Loki is and has always been a liar.' I hated the way my voice sounded, almost desperate to have Thor believe my lie.

Thor stood and called Stormbreaker to him, looking down at me with disdain, a look I had never seen before on his face. It made me feel like a complete stranger, it made me feel unwanted and small and that thing inside of me pulsed, pushing against my skin. I managed to keep a hold of it as Thor spoke,

'I hope for the sake of my people, Evangeline, that Loki is and continues to be what he has always been.'

'A liar?' I answered him, holding myself back from swallowing down the lump in my throat, from showing Thor how rattled I was.

'An illusionist. I hope Loki was telling the truth for once because if it was you who had lied to me, betrayed me,' Thor gritted his teeth, a low growl shaking his chest as he shook his head, the picture of a disappointed father, 'I do not think I am capable of such forgiveness.'

'Thor-' I started for him, pushing from the wall and trying to find my words and offer an explanation. But what would I have told him, how I felt about Loki, what Frigga had shared with me? No, I don't think there was any reasonable explanation for Loki and I being together - not one that Thor wouldn't be disgusted with.

'I am old.' Thor raised a hand at me to halt me, his eyes narrowing in on me, 'Ancient in your eyes and I have lived many mortal lives and faced much heartbreak and many tragedies. But this is something else, this is a betrayal of every good thing I have tried to do. Not only for Loki but for you Evangeline.'

'I'm sorry.' Though it was a half-lie from my lips. Thor must have sensed this as his mouth turned into a scowl, he rolled his shoulders,

'I am not sure what is worse, expecting that Loki wouldn't have done this, or having you lie for him when he would never do the same for you.'

I had to press my lips together to keep every single nasty truthful thought from escaping. I wished to tell Thor with every fibre of my being that Loki was what I wanted, maybe all that I had wanted since being brought to New Asgard. It would have been a sick and twisted little payback for his own harsh truth back on the ship.

'You will turn into him.' Thor's finger pointed toward me, his eyes flashing bright blue and the air crackling around him. At his words and the threat of his power, that thing inside of me writhed and pulsed out of my skin, I managed to hold it back, the magenta threads weaving between my fingers as I lifted them before me to inspect.

'A villain.' I remembered Thor's words on the ship, what I was meant to become, who I was meant to become. The Norse Antichrist. Djofull. Devil.

'Lonely, Evangeline.' Thor corrected. My eyes lifted to greet his, and his had returned to normal once again but his power had not yielded as mine had not either.

'So who will you punish? Me or him.'

'Neither.' Thor shook his head and turned, stalking away from me with Stormbreaker grasped tightly in his hand, 'The two of you will manage just fine on your own.'

Chapter Text

The palace was quiet and I was left with my thoughts as I ascended the half-dozen flights of stairs up to my room. My mind was an abyss of dark, cold rage, my thoughts loud and rattling inside my skull. I had to ball my hands into fists to stop the power from pressing up against my skin to unleash.

But god did I want to unleash it.

As I took the last few steps up to my floor, exhaustion hit me and I couldn't think of anything else but sleep, maybe it was a better option though, to rid myself of everything that had happened the past forty-eight hours.

I hoped to sleep and escape all my poisonous thoughts of Loki, the nasty ones and the dirty ones too. To pretend there wasn't only a wall between us as I slept - stopping him from finishing what he started. To pretend that when I woke up everything might go back to normal, maybe luck would be on my side and Thor would allow me to escape back to the lighthouse for a while, maybe he might have Loki thrown out of the palace. I couldn't imagine he would want to throw me out, despite his embarrassment, really I should have run and left them to the world they were used to.

Though really I didn't want to run away and after the bombshell that Loki had dropped on me - that we were mates - I didn't want him running away either. I knew he would, eventually as he always did but now knowing the truth I'm not sure if it made it better or worse. So who was Loki protecting, himself or me?

As I stalked into my room, unpinning the circlet crown from my head and tossing it toward my bed I let out a surprised cry at the sight of Kit sitting on the edge of it.

The circlet missed the bed and dropped to the floor, the gold ringing out against the marble. Kit turned to me, first his eyes dropping to the circlet on the floor before lifting to me, his hands rested in his lap and he offered me a tight smile,

'I'm sorry. I can't seem to leave.'

I let out a long breath as the door slammed closed behind me and I started toward him. Kit stiffened on the bed, leaning back from me and I realised he was afraid. Of me. Of what I had done to him.

I averted my eyes, humiliated at myself that I had demanded he come to my room, that he was not there by choice. I gestured to the door, turning slightly from him, 'You can leave.'

Kit stood but didn't leave, instead, he stalked to the doors leading to the balcony and gestured me to follow. I did, swallowing back my questions and trying desperately to hide the blush creeping up my neck. What was this?

As if sensing my hesitation, as Kit opened the doors he shot me a tight smile over his shoulder, 'I've been in a cell for three weeks. I need some fresh air.'

'Right.' I answered not knowing what else to say for the sake of not getting my hopes up. My heart thundered as I followed Kit outside, the early morning light soft and gentle on my eyes. Maybe he just wanted to throw me off the balcony for all that I had done to him, both the enchantment and imprisonment. A small morbid part of me imagined greeting my death in the depths of the ocean that sparkled beneath the palace.

I took my place beside Kit, my eyes shifting from the ocean spread out before us and I could only watch as his hands grasped the bannister, his pretty eyes, settled upon the horizon in the distance and the soft golden orange of the sky.

Anxious to hear what he had to say to me, I spoke first,

'Kit-' I began but he turned to face me, his brows drawn together as his words were a rasp,

'I've sat in that cell and practised my speech, what I would say to you when I inevitably saw you again. I don't think I can say what I want to you without making an idiot of myself one way or the other.'

'Go on then.' I swallowed, my hands trembling at my sides.

'I'm decidedly in love with you Evangeline.' Kit's face transformed as he said the words, his eyes narrowing with sincerity, his lips pressed into a tight line. I could only let out an exhaled breath and fight back the bubble of nervous laughter in my throat.

My heart pounded in my chest as a blush spread across Kit's cheeks and he shook his head slightly, lowering his gaze,

'See, told you, idiot.'

'But we're-'

'Strangers?' he answered for me, meeting my gaze once again with a firm nod. He knew it was as crazy as I was imagining it to be. Though a feral part of me, the one that could only see the man before me as something to control, devour, enchant was enjoying his nervousness and his admission. I fought to keep my eyes on his though I had wanted to drag them down his body at recalling him telling me he wanted to be my pet. If he could so easily admit how he felt about me would he do anything I asked?

'Yes, strangers.' I answered him after a moment, my hands curled into tight fists at my side to reign in the power that pulsed against my skin like its own heartbeat. If I had let it slip would it enchant Kit, have him do anything I bid, or worse, harm him? Would it mistake my sexual hunger as murderous intent?

As if sensing my fears Kit raised his hands, 'You're not making me say this.'

'You can't just decide to be in love with me.' Even as the words left my mouth it felt ridiculous, and my eyes flitted over to the closed doors leading to Loki's room.

'Why not?' Kit asked like it was the simplest thing in the world, to just decide to love someone. To decide to love me.

My gut twisted at the realisation that Loki had never been able to make that decision for me as easily as Kit - a complete stranger - had. It hurt worse than I could imagine knowing that even though our lives were twisted together, Loki and I were made for one another and he could not make the choice to love me as easily as I had for him. It felt like a betrayal, it proved that Loki was powerful and I was powerless, an unwilling victim and then my chest tightened with anger, my skin burning.

'That isn't how it works.' I told Kit, my tone fierce and a frown settling on my face.

'Did Loki tell you that?' he shot back, his own gaze shifting to the doors behind me. I made the mistake of following his gaze, my heart fluttering imagining Loki standing there listening to our conversation but he wasn't there.

A warm wind picked up on the balcony and ruffled my hair and I turned back to Kit who looked at me with raised brows, expecting me to lie to him and deny my involvement with my uncle, deny that nothing was happening between us romantically. But what was the point, Kit had seen how Loki reacted earlier in the cells, it was more than a fiercely protective uncle, it would be hard to dismiss his behaviour as anything other than jealousy.

'Something like that.' I breathed and turned back to the bright morning sky before us, gripping the bannister like a lifeline, holding everything inside of me, to stop myself from tumbling over into the water and drowning in everything I felt.

Kit's sigh sounded apologetic and he leant forward on his forearms, looking up at me, 'Does it hurt, not having him love you back?'

There were nasty words I wished to spew at Kit at that moment, though I expected my power to pulse against my skin in anger at his bold words it didn't and my shoulders slumped with a long sigh. I had to take several shallow breaths to swallow down the lump in my throat before I spoke, still not looking at Kit beside me,

'It feels like I'm being punished.'

'Maybe that is his intent, he seems to enjoy playing the part of the villain.'

I felt myself grow angry at Kit's words, how easily he had stereotyped Loki as the rest of the world had done. Yes, his past actions had painted him as the villain, and he had been honest in his intent as to why he had first come to earth, but since then he had proved himself, his service to the throne at least.

'He is not bad. I wish people would stop saying that.' my eyes landed upon Kit beside me but he did not fight me on it, I felt a little regretful at snapping to Loki's defence at the look that passed upon Kit's face, how apologetic he looked for making such quick judgements,

'It will not keep you alive, loving him so fiercely.'

I knew this. It just hurt more having Kit - an almost stranger - tell me this. I knew if I kept on this path I would become what Thor believed I would become - Djǫfull - I would grow wicked in my loneliness, and my desperation and wanting I had for Loki would turn into resentment. I wasn't sure what would come quicker, hating him or myself.

My eyes had fallen onto my palms stretched out before me, threads of magenta power circled there like small spiderwebs in a soft wind but they did not pulse or unleash themselves from my touch - almost as if my power was not a part of me, its own beast. I had an inkling that eventually whatever power I held inside of myself would make its own decision about what to turn me into. Hero or villain.

I clenched my fists as I felt Kit's eyes upon me, watching and waiting for me to do something with my power. I wished that Frigga had not been so abrupt with her words, that she had given me more information, that she might have told me how to control my emotions and the power I now had no idea how to control.

Loki is your future she had said. And briefly, I had allowed myself to think her words were fantastical, almost hopeful, and that I might share a happy and loving future with Loki. But now the words soured and turned black in my mind, a curse rather than a wish. Had she known when she had told me my fate that Loki would dismiss it, that he had plans of his own?

My mind snagged on another piece of information Frigga had told me, something about having multiple fates, she had told me that she hadn't wished to reveal so much should she change my path. I hadn't allowed myself to take in everything she had said before, too caught up in my turbulent emotions for Loki, the confusion of the crash and everything that had transpired at the Avengers Compound.

I pushed off the balcony and stalked back into my room, I felt Kit's eyes upon me as I paced. I needed the movement to channel my thoughts which were pounding against my skull. Had Frigga mistakenly told me that Loki was not my only choice, that perhaps I had another chance at happiness?

I stopped for a brief moment and looked up to find Kit hovering by the balcony doors,

'When you say you're in love with me, what do you mean?'

Kit opened his mouth to speak, his brows furrowed as he struggled to find the words but I raised a hand to hush him, to explain myself instead,

'Do you mean that you see a future with me, do you want me to love you too?' I pressed my lips firmly together, hating that my question sounded so desperate.

Kit hesitated and reached up to run his fingers through his hair, 'Eva, I don't really know. I thought I might just tell you how I felt before I left. I hadn't really made a plan.'

I tried to hide my disappointment with a tight smile. I had half-expected Kit to have made a grand gesture of his love for me, to have pledged himself to me for eternity or for him to make dramatic promises of a life together filled with devotion and passion. I suppose being a princess only inflated my romantic ego. I tried not to imagine it had anything to do with being hopelessly in love with the God of Mischief, and how dramatic everything he did was.

Kit took several steps into the room, still hesitant of me but his smile was kind and his blue eyes did nothing but bring me closer to him. I appreciated the way the sunrise illuminated him, something about him seemed luminous, whether it was my tired mind playing tricks or just getting caught up in the moment - it almost seemed as if Kit looked younger, cleaner, his hair darker and face unshaven like Loki's. My stomach dropped imagining that Loki would reveal himself wearing Kit's skin, that all of this was a sick prank.

But Kit stepped toward me and the light shifted, he looked his usual self save for a smirk playing across his lips, I beat away any thoughts that it was Loki before me,

'What is this about?' Kit asked me,  'Why do I feel like you're making a plan?'

'I'm deciding my fate.' I folded my arms over my chest, now more cautious about what I might share with Kit should it really turn out to be Loki toying with me.

'You can't decide your fate.' Kit shook his head, a frown settling on his face.

'I think I can. I think I have to if i want to be happy.'

'Eva, I'm not a substitute for your happiness with him.' the way in which Kit said it devastated me and had me feeling small. The truth of his words stung, it hurt, even more, knowing that he could see through me so easily. I had never meant to think of him as a substitute, but I suppose some part of me knew that whoever I ended up with would inevitably be Loki's replacement.

He looked at me, a forceful breath escaped his nostrils as his brows furrowed and his jaw clenched. Kit started for the door wordlessly, brushing past me in a long stride, his hands buried in his pockets.

'Kit,' I called after him, trying to grasp onto an apology but nothing that came to mind would prove him wrong. The man admitted he was in love with me after spending three weeks locked in a cell and I had basically told him that he was my plan B.

I didn't follow him, thinking it best to let him go and be angry with me, maybe I even supposed that he could save himself the devastation of ending up with me and trying to fit into this fractured version of a family. But as I stood there, alone in my room I realised that I hadn't wanted to be a part of whatever trio Thor and Loki and I were. Inevitably I would be alone. Loki would leave and Thor would follow his friends wherever they went and be a hero to the world, and I would be alone awaiting my fate as Djǫfull.

I wasn't willingly going to head toward that future. I could love Kit, I thought perhaps I could love anyone that wasn't Loki if I tried hard enough. Even if it wasn't as deep, as fierce as my need for Loki, I could at least grant myself the favour of being happy. For a time. I could convince myself eventually that Loki was not what I needed.

I rushed from my room, swearing in frustration at the skirt of my dress getting caught under my feet as I sailed down the stairs with heavy breaths. Once I reached the ground floor I paused for a moment to catch my breath and followed the long halls towards the front of the palace.

The large gilded doors were open to showcase the gardens beyond but instead of being filled with tourists, a gathering of armoured men blocked my way. Some were fit out in the plated gold of the Einherjar, standing tall and fierce against more men in similar armour of rich crimson and silver.

Amongst them, voice deep and compelling was Thor. I hesitated to move further, not able to understand what he was saying, his words quick and furious in the Asgardian language. I could not see who he spoke to and thought to move toward Thor and ask but I didn't have to as he turned toward me, the Einherjar parting in one swift movement to reveal Kit stood before Thor, his left hand raised as if to halt the crimson guards behind him.

'What's going on?' my voice felt far away as I strode toward Thor, his eyes met mine and though I could still sense he was angry at me, he tried to bite back his grin as he spoke, but his words fell away, muted and garbled as I took in Kit before us.

But it wasn't Kit. Not fisherman Kit, not human Kit. There was no grey in his hair, his face was clean-shaven, his eyes were a deeper blue, and no lines creased his forehead with age, his teeth were white and straight, he was startingly gorgeous. As he blinked at me I let out a sharp breath, the golden glow of the morning upon the gardens did little to help my staring at Kit as he finally spoke,

'I didn't quite get to tell you the entire truth about who I am Eva. I'm sorry.' he dropped his head in what looked like a bow and I stood there wordlessly. Thor spoke my name beside me before letting out a soft laugh but I didn't quite get the joke or the fucking punchline.

Kit offered me a tight smile and opened and closed his mouth as if hesitating to speak to me, he glanced once at Thor who flicked his hand out at him as if in encouragement. My heart thundered in my chest in anticipation of his words of explanation. How he had gone from human, fisherman, stranger to something decidedly inhuman and ethereal and important from the looks of the guards that flanked either side of him.

'My name is Khristophe Nielsson, third son of King Nielsson of Vanaheim,' Kit spoke and his words were confident, his chin lifted slightly as he spoke, offering me the truth about who he was.

'Prince of Vanaheim.' Thor leant down to me and whispered the words. I stood back, away from Thor who was grinning like Kit's title meant something like they had not all lied to me since my arrival about who he was.

'The Thrice Prince?' I blurted out loudly, my voice seeming to echo around the gardens. I felt the eyes of all men on me, judging, curious, belittling me as I stood there amongst them and I could only move away from them as Kit moved toward me, his hands raised in apology for his lies.

I could not settle my nerves as the Einherjar shifted behind me, blocking my path back into the palace with their strength and gold-plated armour. Kit's own guards mirrored those behind me and Thor shifted beside me telling me to calm down, to take a deep breath but the soothing tone he used only felt like a betrayal like he was trying to convince me that this was not a trap, that the guards blocking my exits meant me anything but harm.

That thing beneath my skin, the power that had stayed hidden for a brief while rose up to the surface of my skin and as I glanced down I could see my forearms tinted in magenta. I felt the world tilt, my thoughts raced in a jumbled blur, my only understanding was that I was not safe, that there in that palace, with the man who was supposed to be my father, I was not safe. I had been lied to, manipulated, and influenced so that I could be what they needed me to be.

I glanced up at Kit, his eyes cast downward to my hands. Thor spoke my name as a warning.

And I let it loose.

Chapter Text

Around me, the world smelled of saltwater and flowers in bloom. I stood with my hands curled into fists at my side, scattered around me were the Einherjar. Somewhere close, Thor called my name in a pained stutter. I could not see Kit amongst the scattered guards and armor.

I didn't stay to see how many I had killed. I fled. No one followed me, no armed guards or townspeople with pitchforks. Perhaps the silence made it worse, only the slapping of my feet on the pavement and pounding of my heart in my throat.

Whatever power I had expelled had weakened me and I didn't make it far, my feet dragging as I hid behind a tree, collapsing against it, the landscape of green before me tilting as I struggled to draw in my breath, my hands pressed against my chest.

I sat like that for a long while, my body filled with nervous energy, my head pounding and I could not concentrate on any one thought or piece together what had just happened. The power, the magic, whatever it was, it had just come out of me, as simple as breathing, a natural reaction to the fear. I lifted my hands to see the magenta pulsing beneath my skin, calmer now that I was safe. As if my outburst had satiated it. I tried to swallow, my throat dry.

There was a rustle of grass and soft footsteps coming toward me and I turned my head to see who it was that was stupid enough to come for me, the power did not pulse against my skin, and I could feel nothing inside of me shift or yearn to be released, I could only feel the thudding of my heart and the heavy pain of my chest when I inhaled. I thought my unease might draw my power out of me again.

Loki appeared before me and he offered me a small if not mocking smile. I sat up straighter as he made his way toward me silently, he was not cautious about his movements around me and it settled my nerves as he looked down at me, folding his hands behind his back. He was dressed in his Asgardian leathers, much grander ones than I had ever seen before, embossed with gold that gleamed in the early morning sunlight.

Even now as he stood before me - the backdrop of the palace gardens behind him, the small smirk on his lips, his blue eyes firm on me - I wanted him. Desperately. So much so that something curled in my lower belly, a  delicious feeling of anticipation that only made my body react in wicked ways. I pressed my thighs together tightly but it did little but make me wetter.

I was too enthralled by his appearance before me to say anything smart-arsed and I had thought he was gone for good after what Thor had witnessed. I folded my arms over my chest, lifting my chin to him defiantly,

'Are you coming to see if I'm okay?'

Loki's brows furrowed, a small crease forming between his brows,

'No.' he said looking down at me like I'd asked him something scandalous.

I didn't bother hiding my disappointment as I frowned at him, sitting up a little straighter against the tree. I shouldn't have hoped as much. Even after having annihilated the Einherjar and releasing my power, I thought maybe he might have come running more so after the revelation that I was his mate. Did he not want to protect me? At least instinctually? Was he really so adamant to fight it?

'You're here to taunt me then.' I stated.

He shrugged, 'It was too good of an opportunity.'

I grasped the tree behind me to pull myself up, my body still weakened by the release of power that I almost collapsed but Loki's hands were on me, grasping my waist. I almost collapsed again with the feel of his fingers pressing against me. I shook him off me quickly to dispel the need to have him touch me more, my mind bringing up torturous thoughts of us in the cell, how close we had come to fucking. I knew it would have been bliss, I wasn't sure who I hated more, myself for knowing I would have let him have me anyway he wanted or Thor for interrupting us.

'You're a piece of shit.' I muttered in his direction, shifting on my feet so that the tree took my support.

Loki chuckled at my words. It was surprising to hear the sound and as he laughed I saw the way that his face changed, how his blue eyes lit up and I could see the length of his dark lashes, the small creases around his eyes, the way that his cheeks rounded. He was joyful.

I couldn't help but let my own smile slip at the sight.

'I thought you'd be gone, after what Thor caught us doing.' he told me, eyes narrowed jeeringly.

'Me?' I balked.

Loki pressed his hands to his chest,
'My dear brother has caught me doing much worse, I don't embarrass easily. I can't say the same for you.'

'When I turn into the Djöfull, I'll remember to kill you first.' my words were half-hearted but I'd had enough of his taunts, I couldn't say the same for the sight of him though. Maybe it was why I hadn't walked away from him yet, I wanted to look at him a little longer.

Loki shifted closer to me, raising one hand to rest beside my head against the tree. This close I could catch his scent, sharp and intoxicating and heavily perfumed with something I couldn't place my finger on. He lifted his other hand, I half-expected him to draw out his dagger but instead, he lifted his index finger to press underneath my chin, lifting it just enough that my lips were levelled with his as he stared at me, his gaze pressing, his words uttered gently in that rasping tone of his I had grown so hopeful to hear again,

'You honestly think you could kill me?' his eyes widened, almost as if he was pleading with me to say no, that I would never do such a thing. His kindness or rather, softness towards me could only have been mistaken as flirting. My cheeks burnt red and my hands turned into fists at my side. This was only him doing his best to torture me.

'I'll try my fucking best.' I promised him, not breaking his gaze as I said the words. My power pulsed and I was eager to let it go, but still, deep within my belly there was desire building and all it wished to do was to be released and consume Loki.

'How I do love it, darling, when you use such foul words,' Loki leant toward me, his fingers wrapping around my throat. His eyes cast downward as they settled on my lips.

'Are you done?' I asked him already eager to flee from him, from my own thoughts that were becoming consumed by him.

'I'm only getting started,' his fingers pressed into my skin, gently. I did not give him the satisfaction of reacting. I stood still, waiting, watching him unravel. I knew he could feel my pulse, I knew he could smell my desire but I would not be the one to fold, I would not give him the satisfaction.

A long moment passed and Loki finally tilted his head back so that he could see my face and hope to catch whatever I was thinking but I only looked at him blankly, my lips pressed together tightly, holding back everything I wished to say to him, rather to ask of him.

'You're not making this very fun.' he said, blowing out a deep breath through his nostrils.

I smiled at him, fluttering my lashes, 'Is this your best?'

His hand around my throat tightened again, this time firm enough that I knew he would leave bruises. Loki dropped his hand beside my head and reached for my cheek before his hand curled into a fist and he dropped it to his side. He was fighting touching me, I knew, and if anything it only made me want to push him more.

But I refused, this fight I wouldn't be willing to lose.

Loki shifted forward so that our bodies were pressed together, his hand on my throat like an anchor, stopping him from doing anything completely reckless.

'I want to consume you.' he told me, in an instant his irises changed from blue to red, and his hand on my throat burned with cold but I did not cower, he had asked me never to cower from him. And I wasn't afraid of him or his past or the power he held but of myself because I knew I did not have it in me to ever tell him no.

It was a disastrous truth, how much I already loved him, made worse with the fact he would do what he could to stop himself from loving me.

What little anger I had left in me I released and it took Loki with it, shoving him from me so forcefully that he was flung across the garden before his back hit another tree, he collapsed before it.

Before I could worry that I had done him any damage, Loki was on his knees, throwing his head back to shift his long hair from his eyes, there was a grin on his face.

'Don't tempt me.' I warned him, grateful for the space between us now. I felt I could breathe a little, and get my thoughts straightened out. Loki stayed knelt in place, his jaw clenched as I stalked toward him, my legs still unsteady but I forced myself to appear strong.

'I am done.' I told him. It was a lie. With the way he looked at me - his eyes still red - I knew he knew it was a lie but he did nothing to correct me, he only watched as I closed in on him.

At my closeness, his skin transformed. He did little to stop the process, every inch of visible skin shifting into that cool blue pallor of his Jötunn self, in broad daylight I could better make out the raised markings on his skin that defined what he really was.

'Are you going to renounce me that easily?' his chest heaved with deep, angry breaths but his words were mocking.

I couldn't help myself, my hand swung forward to slap him on his cheek but I was not fast enough as Loki grasped my wrist and pulled me down onto my knees before him, his arm snaking around my waist as he pulled me to him and kissed me sharply, his lips cool on mine but at the touch, I was boneless, if not for his support I think I would have collapsed.

Loki forced my lips open with his tongue, his breath in my mouth crisp and cold, like breathing in winter. His hand around my wrist squeezed, my pulse thundered, having him touch me like this, in his Jötunn form was bewildering, I felt like his prey not his equal, rather than an object of his desires an enemy.

I bit down on his bottom lip as hard as I could and tasted blood as Loki's grip on me loosened just enough that I could shove him away from me.

'Enough!' I shouted at him, collapsing onto my back. I threw him a dark look as he reached two of his fingers up to swipe his bottom lip, looking down at his own blood I had drawn.

Before I could drag myself to my feet, Loki's hand was capturing my ankle and he dragged me to him.

He shifted so he hovered over me, one hand reaching up to shift my hair from my eyes before moving to tangle in my hair.

'Stop me.' He said.

'You know I won't.' I told him and without a moment's hesitation his lips were on mine once more, hungry and forceful as his tongue seeked invitation into my own mouth again and I tasted his own blood. My body writhed beneath his at the taste, like tasting forbidden nectar, I was fuelled by it, my strength returning to me in a rush.

His free hand tore at the top of my dress, tugging so hard I heard the material rip and I arched my back with a moan as I felt his cold hand grasp my breast roughly. Loki's mouth moved away from mine as he tore at my dress again to reveal my other breast. Then his mouth was on my chest, his tongue flicking out to press against my hardened nipple before his lips closed around it and he sucked.

My body was a flurry of nerves as his other hand groped my breast roughly, his teeth grazing my nipple in his mouth. I had to fight back my moans and thought it best to close my eyes to try and drag some sense into myself but I could not tear my eyes away at the sight of him lapping at my breasts, his blue skin contrasted with his black hair, his crimson eyes finding my own and locking my gaze in his.

'Loki-' I started and then his hand that was grasping my breast moved, shoving up my dress forcefully, like he was angry at the garment itself. My underwear was ripped from me and discarded beside Loki whose hand cupped my pussy.

I let out a deep moan and that thing deep inside my belly was released at the touch of his skin against my sex, around us was a cloud of magenta mist, greeting it was Loki's own emerald magic, casting a cloud around us so that we could not see the outside world.

Loki pulled his mouth away from my breast and pressed his lips back to my own, my hands reaching for his hair and pulling so hard he pulled back with a hiss, his fingers dragging up my slit so painfully slowly I could do nothing but buck my hips and pull on his hair and then he grasped my bottom lip between his teeth and bit down, drawing my own blood like I had done his and as I groaned at the painful sensation Loki plunged two fingers into my wet heat, grinning with my bottom lip between his teeth.

My eyes rolled back, my hands shifting to tear at the earth beside me, my thighs pressed against his hips, my back arching upward so I could fuck his fingers. Loki gave me one last forceful, wet kiss before he pulled back to look down at where his fingers disappeared inside of me.

His fingers curled inside of me, moving in and out once and then twice before he pulled them from me and I whimpered at the loss of him. Loki lifted his fingers to his mouth coated with my wetness and he sucked on them, closing his eyes and groaning loudly. The sight was enough to undo me, as he sucked on his fingers, on the taste of me, I watched the chords of muscle in his neck strain, his nostrils flare with an exhale of breath.

Then Loki's eyes snapped open, his pupil's had all but disappeared, I looked at him but I wasn't sure it was him anymore but rather what he really was.

'Loki,' I breathed his name, like a prayer as his eyes roved over my bare breasts and downward to where my legs were opened, my pussy bared to him and I could do nothing but wiggle closer to him, to show him I wanted more, I wanted him to touch me. I needed him.

He took his fingers from his mouth and plunged them inside of me again agonisingly slowly before he pulled them out to coat my pussy with my own slickness, pressing down on my clit.

'Say my name.' he demanded, not moving, each word a growl between his teeth.

'Loki.' I barely finished speaking before his fingers were back inside me, he continued his torturous pace, the length of his fingers surprising me.

'Louder,' he demanded.

I did as he asked, his name a plea on my bloodied lips. Loki curled his fingers upward and moved his thumb against my clit only drawing pathetic mewls from me, his other hand grasped my thigh, digging into the skin.

Lokis gaze was fixed on my pussy, to where his fingers disappeared inside of me and he licked his lips, his nostrils flaring again and I could glimpse the strain in his leather pants. My fingers dug deeper into the ground, tearing at the grass and dirt beneath. I felt I could tear apart the earth if he released his cock and plunged it inside me.

Loki glimpsed at me, where my gaze was focused and smirked, his eyes still crimson but his pupils returning to black.

'Do you want someone to catch us Evangeline, to see me here fucking you with my fingers?' Loki continued moving his fingers in and out of my pussy.

I whimpered at his dirty words, glancing around at the mist of pink and green around us. It didn't recede and I knew we would not be seen. We were in our own world.

At the thought, Loki's power pulled away like a curtain to reveal the garden around us. My own power receded and my pulse quickened, my mind clouded with my desire so that I didn't have it in me to pull it back, to conceal us.

'What would they think of their dear princess sucking up her uncles fingers so eagerly?' Loki inserted another finger into my pussy and quickened his pace, his thumb circling my clit delightfully.

I could do nothing but squirm at the dirty sound of how wet I was, how my pussy squelched as he fucked me with his fingers. Loki's free hand moved from my thigh and grasped onto his cock still hidden in his leathers.

'What would they think should they see my mouth latched onto that pretty cunt, lapping at it like a man quenched of thirst?'

Before I could understand Loki's words, he was pulling his fingers from me and grabbing my hips, lifting my pussy before his face and dragging his tongue up my slit before enveloping me with his mouth.

I think I screamed but everything was drowned out with the sight of Loki latched onto my pussy, his red eyes rolling back into his head. He let out a deep guttural moan so that it reverberated against my pussy.

Unable to move, to breathe or think all I could do was watch as Loki opened his eyes and kept his gaze locked onto mine, his tongue pushing into my tight hole as he fucked me with his mouth. At the taste of me on his tongue he could do nothing but groan, the sound closer to a whimper and his own pleasure only added to my own, the moans escaping me were wild, uncontrolled things.

I wanted to cum and then, delirious from my orgasm I wanted him to slam his cock into me, my pussy sopping wet from what he had done to me so I would easily welcome the size of him.

Loki licked up the length of my pussy again and latched his mouth around my clit, sucking and drawing my release from me. If I gave it to him would he fuck me? At the sight of him this wild at the taste of me, I could only imagine what type of beast he would be once his cock was inside of me.

I tried to stop myself from coming but I could not stop the release, my body uncoiling as Loki did not stop his ministrations on my clit, his tongue lapping at me, my hips grinding against his face at my best attempt to ride out the waves of euphoria that rocked my entire body, my legs shook with my release, my fingers curling into the first beside me.

Before I could even finish my orgasm and draw breath back into my lungs Loki dropped my legs, my ass hitting the ground, legs splayed open, I could feel my arousal sticking to my thighs.

Loki stood, looking down at me, his lips and chin coated with my release, the back of his hand moved across his face to wipe himself clean.

His skin had returned to its normal porcelain shade, the red of his eyes subsiding to their usual blue.

'I will tell you when I've had enough.' He told me before turning his back to me and heading toward the palace.

Chapter Text

Maybe it was a little cowardly but I spent the rest of the day huddled up underneath the covers of my bed trying to unsuccessfully lull myself to sleep, figuring that when I woke and finally left my room I would have to face the wrath of Thor and what I had done to Kit and his soldiers. Not that I was sorry, I had no control. I was angry.

The truth was that Kit had lied about who he was and for whatever purpose - good or bad - I couldn't trust him. There was a niggling feeling in my gut that the body Loki and I had found of the other Kit in the Vault was closely linked to the sudden appearance of the Vanaheim prince. But everything in my life at the moment felt like disjointed pieces to a puzzle and I wasn't too sure if it was worth piecing it together, if I would like the answers I might find - if the truth might just tilt the scale too far and induce my fate as the Djǫfull.

There was also the strange red amulet in the Vault. The only artefact in the Vault that also snatched me away from Kit and discarded me in Valhalla only so Frigga could relay to me that eventually, I would have to love Loki, take him as a lover- though from his forced admission that we were mates, that seemed unlikely, at least as something more permanent.

I still ached for him though and I feared I always would, physically, emotionally, and spiritually - like I had found the meaning of life but was told that I was unworthy. Still, I wanted to be consumed by him in whichever way he wished to do so.

But needing Loki like I did so desperately was going to decimate me, already my insides blackened with grief at the truth that he would never confess love or affection to me, that we would never be together in the way I wished we could be. I had allowed myself briefly to imagine us married, matching golden bands on our fingers, sharing a near-eternal life together, happy and in love. We would have first had a daughter and then -

I pulled myself from the daydream again as my heart constricted. It was idiotic of me to go there, to imagine that Loki who had never loved anyone - save for that fucking woman Sylvie - would love me, let alone wish to bring a child into the world.

Those daydreams of him and what our life could be easily pulled me into their depths but I had to be cautious, that was not Loki, only a version of him I wished to exist, I couldn't confuse fantasy with reality. I knew I also didn't have it in me not to allow myself the guilty pleasure of those thoughts, not after he had confirmed we were mates. I was still holding onto hope, what small slice he had given me after our encounter in the palace gardens earlier.

Even now laid in bed, I could feel my belly curl with desire at the memory of him touching me in the gardens, I felt myself still coated with my own cum from the wet, smooth laving of his tongue. I knew I would pursue him to whatever end - to have him over me, his cock thrust inside of me right to the hilt, chasing his own release, his blue eyes bleeding crimson as he claimed me, his mate - even if it caused my own insanity.

This bond between the two of you is intentional, Frigga had told me. She had known, just like Thor had known to some degree what I would become, who I would become. But the specifics were hazy, Frigga had never mentioned a Thrice Prince but Thor had, my father knew more than he was letting on and I could only assume Loki did too. So why hadn't they tried to stop me just yet, was it as simple as the fact that they were holding onto hope that I just decided not to become the fucking Antichrist?

Loki could help me grow my powers, perhaps even control them if our showcase in the gardens was an example, his own power reached out to mine in somewhat of a caress. Was a physical relationship with him the answer to controlling that part of me? And if Kit was the Thrice Prince, would he be the one to stop it all? As an ally or an enemy?

There was a loud pounding on my door and I sat up in bed as Thor strode into my room, a broad grin on his face. I gazed at the doors leading to the balcony, a swath of orange over the blue sky indicating the late hour.

Thor stood at the foot of my bed, his hands on his hips. I noticed his black Asgardian leathers were of a different, more decorative design adorned with thick veins of gold and his usual crimson cape was gold. He was dressed as the King of Asgard in all of his fineries, wide gold bands adorned his wrists. I knew this meant he was here to see me on official palace business, he was in his Asgardian king garb.

'Are you feeling well?' He asked me, his light brows raised expectantly awaiting my answer.

'Fine.' Though my tone suggested otherwise, Thor seemed content enough with my short answer and gave a small nod, letting out a huff of breath, like whatever news he was here to deliver would be unpleasant. I awaited the news of Kit's or his guard's deaths but instead, Thor said,

'We have guests,' he gave me a tight-lipped smile and awaited me to rise from bed and dress. I didn't, choosing instead to simply blink at him like I had no idea what he was asking of me. Thor flicked his hand out, gesturing to the covers I still remained underneath, the grin he wore when entering my room long gone.

'You have to dress.' He told me.

'No. I don't want to.' I told him, crossing my arms over my chest. I knew I was being petulant, that if anything I should have been listening to Thor after my little tantrum but the power that still wound its way underneath my skin was persistent and my body felt wound tight like it still wished to be released and cause some real pain to make up for my own.

Two small lines creased between Thor's brow and he mimicked my actions, straightening his spine and shifting on his feet like he was readying himself for a fight. He wasn't wrong, if he kept pushing I would give him one.

'You're expected at dinner, Eva. The least you could do to make up for injuring the Prince and his guards.'

I sat up a little straighter in bed, so I had hurt people. I kept myself from unfolding my arms and looking at my hands in search of that power beneath my skin as it hummed gently in what felt too closely like an approval at Thor's news. A wave of guilt washed over me but I couldn't have done too much damage if Thor's casual entrance was any indication.

My gut roiled and I swallowed down any weak excuse I might give Thor as to why I couldn't go downstairs and apologise for what I had done. I just couldn't face them, any of them. He had to know of my humiliation but it was more than that, I didn't like the company - I don't think I could force myself to sit through a dinner with men who had done nothing to lie to me.

If I knew Loki, I knew he would be attending, probably making innuendos across the table about our rendezvous in the gardens - he was unable to keep away from mischief and scandal let alone cause it.

And what did Thor expect, that the four of us sit around a table and interact like dignified and polite royalty? What would we discuss? That my uncle was my mate, the palpable sexual tension that was between us, Kit lying to me about who he was despite a shocking love confession, my father being absent for my entire life or maybe something less scandalous like climate change?

I couldn't stand the lying anymore. I couldn't handle any more postponed truths. It was becoming apparent that each man in my life was deceitful and their reasons for being so were always so that I could be protected - from myself.

That was a bitter fucking pill to swallow, it was made worse by the fact that they assumed with my human age that I was more akin to a child, that I still needed to be coddled and had no emotional intelligence. Everyone around me assumed I was going to implode. But I was too spiteful to prove them right and honestly, I was exhausted.

It was clear from the soft tone of Thor's voice that he didn't want to upset me further, that he knew I didn't have the nerve to face Kit, and Loki as well but I didn't need to fill him in on all the details.

'It will be fun.' Thor promised and rounded the bed to perch at my side, the bed sinking with his weight.

'For who?' I asked, my eyes widening, could he see my fear? I could see his pity clear as day and it irked me. I wasn't weak but it seemed my circumstances in this palace, as the Princess of New Asgard were proving so. I had too much to prove, as the daughter of Thor and granddaughter of Odin. Two gods, two mighty, powerful and infamous gods who had made real change in the universe.

And what did I offer? How could I sit there and not be made a mockery of, what power I did have was uncontrollable, I was no warrior, no saviour of the universe, I hadn't battled monsters or risked my life for anyone or any great cause.

I didn't know why Thor's simple demand that I attend dinner had brought this on, maybe because I sort of liked Kit, or because it was the first time I would have to be present in official palace business. I didn't even know what my purpose was here in New Asgard, one day I would become Queen of New Asgard but I had told myself that was millennia away, that in the meantime I could enjoy my life. But now, faced with the prospect that I would need to perform as a princess, my blood turned cold.

'Is this about Loki?' Thor's voice was near a whisper, as he tore me from my thoughts once again.

'What, no,' I grated, suddenly the weight of the covers was too much, my skin heated and I had to kick them off of me, my eyes meandering to the doors leading to my balcony. I needed some fresh air.

'That wasn't where my mind was.' I frowned and started for the doors.

Thor stood and cleared his throat, 'I understand that Loki is not blood but I cannot allow the two of you to-'

I turned on my heel to face my father, 'We are not talking about that.' I cut him off, my gaze firm, I tried to hide my own embarrassment as I turned back and flung the doors open and breathed a sigh at the rush of ocean air on my skin.

'Loki is still your uncle, Eva.' Thor pressed, following me out onto the balcony closely. I wasn't sure if it was me or him but the air crackled with electricity and heat.

'Not by blood.' I kept my gaze firm on the horizon before me, thinking Thor wouldn't hear me. I planted myself before the railing, arms resting against the cool marble, grateful for the sharp, cool wind from the ocean on my skin.

'That isn't-' he stuttered and I turned to my side to catch a flustered version of my father gripping the railing, sharp cracks forming in the marble from his strength, 'I forbid it.'

'You forbid it?' I couldn't help but let out a bout of laughter at his ridiculous demand.

'Yes. As your king and foremost as your father.' A muscle in his jaw twitched as his blue eyes bore into my own. I was sure this time that the darkening clouds above us and the static causing the hair on the back of my neck to rise was Thor's doing.

'And you think I'm just going to let you decide who I love, who I choose to be with? Jesus, Thor this isn't-'

'You love him?' Thor exhaled sharply as if my words had physically stolen his breath. Something flashed in Thor's eyes akin to betrayal, I had somehow felt that in admitting my love for Loki I had failed my father and the realisation only brought my power to the surface, it pressed against my skin awaiting release with a dull pain like pins and needles.

'And so do you.' I threw back at him, 'How is it any different?'

'I am his older brother, it is my duty.'

'And I'm his...' I caught myself before I admitted the truth of my and Loki's matehood. I refused to share that with Thor in fear that he would look down upon me further, and think less of me. I knew Loki had hated even telling me about the deep bond that we shared but to tell Thor, even in the spur of the moment felt wrong - like Loki and I being mates was secret, special. But I suppose that was just me holding onto hope again.

I cleared my throat, turning to face Thor head-on, hoping to drive home my feelings, that I refused to back down, that he had no power over me and Loki.

'He is not unloveable.'

But I failed at convincing Thor as his face softened and I didn't know what was worse, the look of betrayal on my father's face or the look of pity. My gut twisted with a mix of anxiousness and guilt.

'Eva,' Thor's eyes narrowed, his broad shoulders slumped a little as he released his grip on the railing, his hands gently laid upon my shoulders and I had never felt so small. A lump formed in my throat and I swallowed it back.

'That is his allure, his trick. He is unobtainable. Loki has never loved, he has only ever wanted love. He has killed for it, he isn't capable of understanding that love and kindness go hand in hand, he thinks it is something to be won. This is a game to him.'

I shrugged Thor off of me, 'He's capable of change.' I nodded knowing I was convincing myself more than I was him, 'You know he wouldn't have come back home otherwise.' I could barely get the words out and I swallowed down the sob rising in my throat.

Was I just lying to myself? Grasping onto any good deed Loki had done for Thor in order to convince him that he give his brother yet another chance, that Thor give Loki a chance with me? What good had Loki done for me besides save me from those men in the Compound - even that was a stretch, the mating bond probably convincing him to do so.

'You'll stop this, you'll keep away from him.' Thor's tone was like cold steel, he rose to his full height, chin raised as he glared down at me—no longer a demanding father but an obstinate king, an old god.

'Or what?' I snapped, sick of his attempt to suddenly start parenting me. I was a grown woman, I refused to have what little freedom I had left be dictated.

'I will banish him from Midgard. I will strip his titles. I will imprison him in Jotunheim for the rest of his existence. Alone.'

'That isn't how this works, you cannot just throw threats my way. I'm not some child, Thor.'

'You are my child!' Thor roared. The sky split in half with lightning, thunder echoed and reverberated against the palace, shaking us where we stood on the balcony. Thor stepped forward, crowding me, his right hand crossed over his chest to rest against his heart, his eyes shone electric blue as they bore into my own.

'I will do what I must to protect you. I will not let you die, I won't let you be another person I lose.'

And even though the world around us darkened with his power- the sky slashed with azure bolts of lightning, the ocean churning into a wash of grey -Thor fell apart before me, shedding silent and easy tears as he spoke, barely audible, his words rough and broken,

'I carry with me the grief of an extinct realm, my home - what was meant to be your home - my daughter's home, your legacy. But that is now gone and I must face my curse of heartbreak, even if it means finally casting out Loki.'

'Thor.' I needed him to stop, because seeing him like this struck me down with the truth of my actions, of my feelings and though I knew I didn't want to, my entire fucking soul fought against it - I knew that whatever Loki and I had or didn't have or what I wanted to have with him was not worth it, not when he could take it all away in a moment. Not when it hurt Thor - my dad - as much as it did.

'I have one thing left Eva and that is you and I refuse for it to be only for a short time.' Thor shook his head, reaching for me and pulling me to him in a tight hug, his large hands cradling my head like my dad did when I was little and the gentleness of the gesture had tears falling from my own eyes. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried not to let my own sobs burst from my mouth, instead, my body wracked with them silently as I shook in Thor's arms. Everything felt heavy.

'Promise me,' Thor pleaded with me, his voice muffled above me, ' Promise me you will stay away from Loki.'

I couldn't answer him. I unravelled and wrapped my own arms around him as I let out a choked breath with everything I had been holding in slipping loose from my chest, finally being breathed into the world. Losing my parents, being thrown into this new world and hardly managing to keep afloat here and holding onto Loki and what I felt for him like a fucking lifeline.

And none of it would last, not like I wanted it to anyway. And I cried for Thor, for what he had lost and what I knew he wished he could give me, that in his own way, he was trying and I was giving him little in return, no gratitude no thanks and how must that have felt for him, how lonely was he? And this was so much larger than Loki - Thor's pain, my pain, the pain of nine realms - what we had all lost was beyond the scope of understanding, it was why we had to keep moving forward, shrouded in guilt for surviving and wishing we hadn't.

Thor said my name, shifting so he could grasp my face but I couldn't open my eyes, I couldn't face him, I couldn't face the decision I knew I would have to make and regret but it was the only way.

'Eva,' Thor said again, 'Promise me.'

Finally, finally, I opened my eyes and blinked away my tears to see a blurred image of my father before me, that bright light gone from his eyes, his anger and his pain having dissipated. I swallowed, forcing the words from my mouth,

'I promise I'll stay away from Loki.'

And all Thor could do was nod in approval and press a soft kiss to the top of my head before he stepped away and I wiped furiously at the tears on my face with the back of my hands, small sobs causing me to hiccup but I tried to swallow them down.

When I looked at Thor again he was scrunching up his nose trying to stop his own tears, his hands placed firmly on his hips. If I wasn't still so upset I would have laughed at him and how hard he was trying to make himself look unaffected by his own tears.

'I will see you shortly, for dinner?' it was a question and one I hadn't expected.

'Sure.'

Thor hesitated before starting for the door, his golden cape flowing behind him. The sky above me shifted, clouds parting to reveal glimpses of darkening blue and the stars beyond. I turned to glance at the inky sea behind me still awash with Thor's diminishing distress. I half wanted to throw myself into its depths and scream beneath the weight of the water.

A sharp thought tugged at my mind, one I knew I had to ask while he was still here, before all of this is forgotten, before I carried out my promise to him.

'I thought you were going to let us punish one another?' I called after Thor, referring to his earlier declaration when he had caught Loki and me in the cell.

Thor didn't stop, he only slowed his pace, his head thrown over his shoulder as he spoke rapidly,

'I suddenly remembered I was the King and that it is my job.'

Chapter Text

When Thor had told me he expected me for dinner he was being modest. It was a fucking party.
I wondered if Thor had invited half of the kingdom's nobility to impress our guests or to piss me off for taking so long to come downstairs. I was terrified of what I would be walking into. I would do good on my promise to Thor but what was I meant to do when Loki so obviously placed himself in the centre of my world?

Every strategy I had come up with would inevitably be futile because I couldn't for the life of me guess what his reaction would be. If I ignored him would he laugh, grow angry, tease me, humiliate me? What if I was polite but withdrawn, would he throw all of our secrets in front of Thor and our guests to get a rise out of me or would he grow bored and plan to play with me later?

And then that also left Kit. Who the fuck was he and what did he want? How much of what he had told me had been a lie? Surely he wouldn't disclose to Thor what happened in the cells, would he?

I stood at the open doors of the dining room as my gaze wandered, looking for Thor amongst the opulently dressed guests whose eyes landed on me and my traditional Asgardian dress of black and gold. Though Thor's garb was also fit for battle, my dress was nothing more than sheer pieces of chiffon that wrapped around my breasts fell over my shoulders and dropped to the floor in soft waves. A thick and heavy piece of gold armour cinched in at my waist and as I walked the skirt parted at my thighs.

The dress covered enough of me but still as guests continued to stare as I made my entrance, my hands felt clammy and I couldn't help but notice their eyes as they passed over me and flickered to the space on top of my head where my circlet crown was meant to be.

I wondered how quickly news had spread of my rage in the palace gardens and was more than a little pissed off that even though I was their princess I was still the topic of their gossip. My anxiety morphed into contempt quickly as I met their stares with a harsh glare, not quite in the mood to feel belittled in my own home, my palace.

My chest burned with hot, white rage and the sudden onrush of it surprised me. I glanced at my clammy hands to see swirls of my power caressing my fingers like rings of magenta mist. I shook my hands like I might rid myself of it but it did not disappear, instead, I chose to ignore it hoping it would go away. I had enough fucking problems that I didn't need to imagine myself turning into the Antichrist in the middle of my dad's impromptu dinner party with half of the kingdom.

I shifted through the crowd, packed tightly and spilling out onto the terrace overlooking the expanse of ocean and to the left the city of New Asgard that followed the coast lit with a soft golden glow. Deep music echoed throughout the dining hall, large wooden tables were overfilled with food, and every single guest had a silver goblet in hand, some even two. I scanned the crowd for a servant I might snatch a goblet from, the Asgardian wine would do wonders for my nerves and it would help to have something in my hands.

Though I was searching for Loki, hoping to spot his dark hair or a swath of his emerald clothing. I couldn't fucking help myself, even after he had left me in the gardens, even after my promise to Thor, I had to see him - to keep myself away from him, at least a small distance away.

I had convinced myself that if he was here that meant he couldn't keep away from me. At this point, his presence felt like a safety blanket - one that was on fire -but I knew that our mating bond meant he needed to ensure my safety. Right?

Sharp curses caught my attention and I spotted Thor upon a raised dais on the terrace, standing between several overstuffed chaise lounges and opposite him stood Loki. My stomach twisted at the sight of him but I refused to let myself think about the other responses my body was having to see him as I gathered my gown in my hands to descend the stairs, there was no railing and people were already so half-drunk that no one moved out of my way so I had to keep my eyes in front of me and on the shit show I was quite literally walking into.

Thor was half-turned from me so that I couldn't quite see his facial expression, but from the constant shaking of his head and raised palms I knew he was arguing with his brother - their hushed words were heated and Loki's finger jabbed at Thor's armoured chest as he sneered at him, his hand waving in my direction.

I swallowed, expecting Loki's eyes to fall on me but someone blocked my view, a tall man with rich chestnut hair dressed in deep navy leather, gilded with silver, a velvet cape falling over one shoulder. He said something, his hands moving as he spoke and Loki turned from Thor to the man and stalked toward him, a dagger slipped from between his fingers as he raised it to the man's neck.

I guessed it was Kit from how Thor's brows shot up, his hands raised in a panic as he slowly approached Loki who paid him no attention, his eyes not shifting from Kit as they bled red. I was conflicted about how I felt seeing Loki change before me, excited to imagine he was threatening Kit out of some overprotective mating bond or panicked to imagine he might hurt Kit and I would be to blame. My steps became more hurried.

I couldn't see Kit's reaction but he didn't shift, whether in fear or indifference, I couldn't tell. The surrounding guests were no help either, though the spectacle Loki was making on the dais had their heads turning their interest dissipated just as quickly. I had a feeling that seeing their prince threaten someone with a blade was a regular occurrence. Some of my panic subsided knowing whatever threat he had made wouldn't be carried out - at least not in front of everyone.

When I reached the steps of the dais, Thor announced me, startling both Kit and Loki, the latter yielding his blade as he moved away from Kit and sunk onto a chaise with a sneer aimed at Thor whose panic had shifted into a mask of hospitality at his brothers retreat. I ignored it and Loki's eyes swept to me but before I could allow myself the pleasure of drinking him in - even in his furious state with his pretty mouth turned into a scowl - I looked away and to Kit who had shifted to face me.

I stumbled as I ascended the last steps of the dais, my gown dropping from my hands as our eyes met and I righted myself with Kit's help, his own warm hands grasping my own, my cheeks spread with heat as I drank in the man before me.

It was Kit. The real one, no more glamour. Prince Khristophe of Vanaheim.

And Jesus fucking Christ did he look the part. I had been stunned before by his appearance but seeing him again without my anger, without my power pushing at my skin I could take him in.

Dropping my hands from his own, I urged myself forward onto the dais and I couldn't help myself as I stood before Kit, making it blatantly obvious I was staring. He was beautiful, perfect almost and he offered me a playful smile, dipping his head as he greeted me, no sign of having just had a dagger at his throat,

'Princess,'

I took the chance to look him up and down, the dark chestnut colour of his hair and contrasting sapphire shade of his eyes, the sharp chiselled angle of his jaw, the broad set of his shoulders and narrow waist, strong thighs and decent bulge in his leathers. What had he said, I want to be your fucking toy, Princess.

My skin rose in goosebumps at the memory of his words. Had I enchanted him or were those enticing words of his part of the act of Fisherman Kit? What about his admission of love? Standing before me now was he still in love with me?

Kit couldn't contain his grin as our eyes caught and my smile grew, something electric passed between us. I was entranced by him, truly. No wonder he had glamoured himself, if he had come to me like this I would have thrown myself at him, quite literally. Something inside of my chest expanded as I stared at the prince, a fluttering in my belly and lightness in my head that had me feeling girlish and giggly and desperate to lean forward and kiss him just to see if -

Thor cleared his throat and my eyes slid away from Kit to settle on my father before they were pulled away to Loki who turned his head from me, the muscle in his jaw tensing. My heart dropped. Was he angry at me for being here and interrupting whatever death threat he had made? I tried not to allow myself to get caught up in whatever Loki was thinking, that wasn't fair.

But I felt a change in the air, a pull in his direction, like an itch that needed to be scratched I had an urge to look at him again but refused myself the pleasure. Even as I felt my entire body yearn to go to him, I refused it and felt sick in my gut.

Him? I heard Loki's mocking voice in my head but ignored it. I was growing insane with my desire to have him, imagining what nasty words he would say to me.

'Prince,' I greeted Kit with a small curtsey and his brow furrowed, behind him Thor's gaze swept the crowd of guests behind me and I turned to see what they were looking at. Had I offended the Prince? Was I making it too clear that I was enamoured by his true looks?

I straightened feeling my face burn and ran my hands down the front of my gown as Kit stepped aside with a gentle smile, gesturing to a chaise for me to sit.

You do not bow to him. Loki growled. I knew this time that it was Loki who was in my head and felt my skin crawl. How was I ever going to keep to Thor's promise now when Loki was in my fucking head. This entire situation was fucked up and now things were made worse with Kit here. I was distracted by the two men and not entirely sure which of the two I would end up embarrassing myself in front of.

I sat on the chaise, Kit sitting beside me. Thor sat to my left on his chaise and uttered something under his breath before reaching for a goblet laid upon a small table between us all. I felt Loki's heated stare but refused to let myself look at him and forced myself to turn from him and toward Kit who offered me a broad smile, so surprisingly genuine and handsome that I couldn't help hide my smile. I hadn't yet had any wine but wondered why what I felt when I looked at Kit was akin to infatuation.

Look at me, Loki demanded.

Again, I ignored him but Loki leant forward and I stiffened at his sudden movement. I wasn't sure what I was expecting, for him to grab my face and force me to look at him. I wouldn't have put it past him. But I couldn't quite catch what he was doing and focused on Kit before me, though my mind felt far away, the hair on the back of my neck rose as Kit leant toward me ever so slightly, I caught a whiff of his scent - clean citrus and something heady that had me leaning in toward him as he spoke.

'You look beautiful,' Kit's gaze darkened as he looked me up and down.

I swallowed, my voice weak, 'You look different. I'm sorry-'

'Eva,' Loki's voice was low and the sound of him addressing me, so gently, so abruptly made my head spin and I could only force out shallow breaths from my nose to keep my anger from rising to the surface and making a fool of me. What fucking game was he playing now?

I refused to say anything and kept my gaze on Kit but his own eyes darted to Loki and back to me and I allowed myself to look toward Loki, not making eye contact as I noticed he was standing, leant over the small table between us, offering me a goblet of wine.

A fucking peace offering? I threw toward him but was met with silence and that only managed to piss me off more for even attempting to communicate with him. I snatched it from him, ensuring not to touch his fingers but Loki let go of the goblet before I could fully grasp it and it slipped, the red wine coating my dress and dripping down the exposed flesh of my thigh.

I nearly fucking screamed. So that was his plan, humiliation?

'Oh dear,' Loki feigned surprise, 'I'm sorry.'

You aren't, I retorted but was met with no response.

'Here,' Kit reached for a napkin on the table but Loki grabbed it first and stood, rounding the small table and bending over me as he placed the napkin on my thigh and his fingers pressed into my skin through the cotton a little too tightly.

'I made you all wet.' Loki said with a tut as he rubbed the napkin against my thigh, rising higher up my leg than the wine reached and even though I didn't want to let him win and have to touch him, I grasped his hand and shoved him away as gently as I could manage all while trying to pretend like I didn't enjoy the feel of his cool skin against my own.

'It's fine.' I lied through my teeth and Loki retreated to his chaise a smug smile on his face. Thor uttered his name but it was ignored as Loki conjured his goblet and smiled into his wine before taking a long drink, My eyes fixated upon the exposed skin of his throat and the way his Adam's apple bobbed as he drank, a singular drop of wine ran down the side of his mouth and dribbled down his throat and I so desperately needed to lick that drop of wine from his neck before sinking my teeth into his throat.

Loki pulled the goblet from his mouth and let out a low growl, his eyes narrowed and set upon me with something akin to fury,

Do it and I'll have you right here in front of everyone.

It was Thor who interrupted us with a rough laugh and I was grateful he did because I had only just leant toward Loki ready to launch at him.

'Enough of your silly games.' Though his objection was aimed towards Loki I knew my father was also warning me. We had guests, the most important one sat at my side. So I fixed my dress, smoothing the fabric over my legs so that they were covered and I fought back the blush rising to my cheeks as I turned back to Kit and pretended I didn't notice Loki's heavy presence, the energy that emanated from him that was directed towards me - a mixture of disdain and sexual aggression that I had to pretend didn't want to make me squirm in my seat. The bastard was right, he had made me wet and I had to press my thighs together to stop myself from throbbing as I could feel Loki's attention entirely on me. I'd be damned if I didn't admit seeing him jealous and so possessive only made me want him more.

Kit's patient and warm smile was enough of a distraction from my racing thoughts as any and I placed my hand atop his on his thigh as I spoke, ensuring that he had all of my attention,

'As I was saying, I'm sorry I was late I -'

'A queen does not apologise.' Loki said trying to divert my attention from the prince once more. I refused to look at him, to acknowledge him after his first stint with the wine - it was one of many for the night I was sure.

Thor laughed, a deep booming laugh that should have lightened the mood but only grated on my nerves as he fed into Loki's bullshit and another one of his interruptions,

'I am still the King.' he said.

'So am I.' Loki's tone was sharp, but his words confused me and my eyes fell upon him sitting straight-backed in his seat, his chin tilted down, the soft glow of the candles around us highlighting the sharp lines of his face, his blue eyes darkened to a shade akin to midnight, his black hair a mess of curls shining with silver light. Something in the air changed - a heavy power that called to my own but also made it cower, strung tight beneath my skin - I felt myself holding my breath awaiting instruction, awaiting Loki to command me.

If there was ever a moment for me to fear him it was then, not when he was wielding daggers or throwing threats at anyone should they look at him wrong. Sat quietly in the New Asgardian Palace, Loki was many things, a god, a prince, a man burdened with many roles and faces but truly he was a King. And often did I forget it and the power that he kept hidden, he was capable of much more than he let on and the heavy realisation of it had me grateful that I had promised Thor I would keep away from him.

His invasion of New York and capture of Asgard were feats played out by Loki for other greater powers, he had been a pawn in those battles but what would he do for me? The thought was sickening but intoxicating and I couldn't help but imagine Loki offering the universe to me on a golden platter.

The magic in my blood sung, a gentle yet thrilling feeling akin to being tickled - that rush that came after the initial shock, a lightness that jolted you with energy but ached for more - it seemed to enjoy the vicious and twisted images of Loki on his knees for me, bloodied from slaughter, grin on his handsome face, offering me someone's heart in his hand still beating, his own maybe?

'What throne is it you are heir to Loki, exactly?' Kit asked.

'Jotunheim.'

'You're a little small for a frost giant aren't you?' Kit teased and I bit back a groan as Loki's lips lifted in a slow smile. The sight was a warning for what was to come - the God of Mischief had started his game,

Don't, I warned Loki but he didn't acknowledge me as he reclined in his seat,

'It has been a while since I have been to Vanaheim. How is your father?' Loki was swift to direct the conversation where he wanted it to go and Thor and I were sharing the same anxious thoughts about how Loki might embarrass or distress our guest as our eyes caught.

Thor spoke, sitting up a little straighter in his seat, 'Loki, you are familiar with the Vanir.'

'You forget I had taken a leave of absence from my duties.' Loki tutted at Thor, ever the actor commuting to his part.

'If that's what you want to call it' Thor took a long drink from his goblet, wiping his lips with the back of his hand as he slammed it down in the table before him and letting out a belch. I cast my father a scornful look at his lack of manners when he had been harping on about mine earlier. He shrugged, Kit chuckled and even the sound of his laughter was enchanting.

I faced him again with a smile at the sound and when our eyes caught there was a zap, a shared moment that was light and comfortable and a little too perfect, just like him. Kit slowly drew his eyes away from me and back to Loki with a shrug, wondering why he was obliging my prying uncle at all,

'He passed onto Valhalla several years ago - as well as Harald, the second eldest - both protecting our realm.' Kit answered.

I am not your uncle. Loki told me at the same time.

Can you hear everything I'm thinking? I asked astonished.

'How sad,' Loki rapped his fingers on the arm of his chair before snapping his fingers and leaning forward, as if he was genuinely interested in the conversation, 'What of your brother, the eldest, Eitri?'

'Erik. He is king.'

Thor said no more games? I tried to press my words into Loki, seeing if they landed, if it was an open channel or if he had some mental power that let me in when he wanted to. I'd have to learn to tune him out. Loki didn't so much as blink, even if he had heard me he was great at pretending he hadn't.

I'm not fond of being told what to do.

'Erik is married.' Kit said simply.

Me too, darling. At this point I was too focused on the slight lift of Loki's lips at my nickname, however quick it was - than whatever conversation he was having with Kit. I saw his eyes flicker to me before settling back on Kit, he wouldn't be distracted from his game.

'I am shocked he has not honoured the treaty.' Loki told Kit.

Am I not an exception, Eva? Loki asked me. If I demand you kneel for me will you part those pretty lips and swallow me whole?

Loki projected an image into my mind - all from his point of view - me on my knees before he sat on the chaise, his hand a tight fist around his thick cock, his other hand caressing my cheek before shifting to move into my hair, pulling harshly to jerk me forward and press the smooth swollen pink head of his cock against my lips and then I opened them willingly with a smile before swallowing him whole with a gag. Loki's eyes drew upward, the party guests watching us wide-eyed.

Audibly, I let out a moan, closer to a whimper but just loud enough that all three men's heads turned to me and quickly I cleared my throat, as the fantasy faded - Loki's or mine, at this point I wasn't even sure - my skin burnt hot at the attention on me. I reached my hand up to tug on the hair at the base of my skull, my lips pressing together. I could feel him, his hand in my hair, his cock pressed against my lips, the length of him as I swallowed him, the tight fit as my lips felt stretched around the girth of him.

Enough. I demanded of Loki.

'What treaty are you talking about?' I looked to Kit because I couldn't face Thor's questionable and offensively clueless looks at my increasingly strange behaviour,

You're a bore, Loki replied but his tone was light, I was hopeful he was putting a pause on his teasing.

Kit didn't answer me and shifted in his seat uncomfortably, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down as he cleared his throat. I wondered if I had overstepped by how his eyes slightly widened when he looked over my head to Thor. What wasn't he telling me? What were they all not telling me?

'Kit, what treaty?' My weak voice conveyed the swelling unease in my gut. Kit shook his head at me before his brow furrowed, sapphire blue eyes conveying his panic. There was remorse there too but it was overshadowed by the simple fact that despite his nice words he was a stranger, I shifted away from him as he attempted to speak, no doubt trying to break whatever news he was about to drop onto me gently but Loki, once again beat him to it,

'The one that dictates you marry Kit's brother.'

'What?' I asked incredulously. Kit cast a dark look at Loki, he had spilled a secret he hadn't wanted to share. I also looked to Loki, as much as I didn't want it to be him, I knew he would be the only one to tell me the truth - even if it was only for his entertainment.

Loki lifted his drink to his lips, his darkening eyes narrowing at me over the goblet awaiting my reaction. A warmth spread through my hands, my power surging again as a mist of magenta covered the tips of my fingers ready to be unleashed.

'Loki.' Thor warned shifting forward in his seat beside me. I didn't dare take my eyes off of my hands in my lap, off of that power. I couldn't risk it, though I could feel my body begin to thrum, my skin strung tight with sharp pinpricks of pins and needles. There was a heaviness in the air to my left where Thor was sitting, his power growing, trying to tell my own to retreat but it did no such thing.

'That isn't what the treaty is.' Kit said softly to me, he didn't touch me and I wasn't sure if this was a good thing or not.

Was he scared? He was right to be. At the same time, I craved Kit's comforting touch, it would have meant he'd forgiven me for earlier, that he wasn't treating me like some kind of monster for releasing my magic upon him and his men, for telling him in more or less words that he would be a sufficient replacement for Loki all while having him locked in the cells for two weeks because he tried to protect me.

As much as he was a stranger and possibly only here to make good on some treaty, I had been using him as much as he had been using me. I was being an asshole I realised.

He's lying to you. Loki taunted me.

Shut up. I warned.

Why do you think he is here? Loki continued, Are you truly that naive to believe he is here for any other reason than to claim the Asgardian throne?

Fuck. Off. My mind went there regardless, why bother staying in those cells pretending to be someone else, why bother lying at all if eventually the truth would be revealed?

Did that mean he wasn't in love with me?

I told you I wasn't. Loki snapped and a small part of me shrivelled, like he had reached inside of me and taken a piece of my heart.

I didn't correct Loki and tried to keep Kit's confession from rising to my mind, our conversation from earlier in my room. I wouldn't be laughed at for that, considering there was a small part of me hoping that Kit had meant it, that there was one person that could love me, crown, title, power and all my bullshit.

I didn't risk looking at Loki either. He wanted a reaction from me and I wouldn't give him one, not publicly. I straightened and took a deep breath through my nose, placing my palms flat to my thighs in an attempt to press that power back underneath my skin.

'What is the treaty?' I asked trying my hardest to keep my voice from wavering.

'My brother-' Kit started.

'I want my father to tell me.' There was a harsh bite of betrayal in my use of Thor's title.

I levelled my gaze at Thor and I didn't think he expected me to put this on him. There was a long moment that passed between the two of us, my eyes pressing into him and his into mine but where my gaze was full of hurt, his was full of devastation. He hadn't meant for this to happen, more lies and secrets and revelations. But he had allowed it anyway and I had to hold onto that.

Thor's words to me in my room, his talk of legacy and protecting me and not losing another loved one fell flat now. I was a fucking pawn and he knew and did nothing but invited Kit in, had him for dinner and demand I be present to greet him like a well-behaved princess.

No more. I was going to be the Queen of New Asgard and I would act like it.

Thor made me promise to stay away from Loki - was that only so I wouldn't find out from his mouth, that the narrative be twisted in his favour and not Loki's?

Thor nodded, ready to bring down the metaphorical hammer on my life once again, no longer mine anyway,

'Erik - Kit's eldest brother - was once betrothed to Hela, a treaty between Vanaheim and Asgard formed in old magic by Odin and King Niels.'

Thor paused, scanned our surroundings and the crowd of guests milling around us yet paying no attention to what was happening. He was sizing up my reaction, wondering if it was worth telling me here, if maybe he should clear out the kingdom before he continued so as not to have me annihilate them all.

'Go on.' I said.

Thor's brow furrowed, he didn't want to be the one to relay this to me but knew he had to. I wished I could revel in his discomfort but instead, it made my mouth sour and my body felt slack.

A glance at my hands proved my power had withdrawn. Thor's had too, the air felt lighter, no longer static with looming thunder overhead.

'It was Hela's punishment,' Thor continued, 'A way for our father to stop her hatred and bloodshed, a way to make her care for more than her people. But it proved to be the opposite and she was imprisoned. When she died the treaty was left unfulfilled.'

'Not void?' I asked, trying to grasp onto some sort of loophole, my mind beginning to grasp for an exit strategy, 'Aren't both kings dead?'

'Treaties such as those - treaties devised by Odin - are forged in blood. The treaty will remain unfulfilled until an Asgardian heir marries a Vanir heir.'

I wonder where I got my love of jokes from, Loki said.

Now is the right time for Thor to tell me I'm adopted. I threw back at him meaning for my words to be vicious but Loki's answer was a resounding chuckle.

'Why can't you?' I asked Thor. My voice was broken, my panic leeching outward, my chest rising and falling in rapid, shallow breaths as I leant toward him.

Surely all his power was worth something, being Odin's son, God of Thunder, my father meant he could undo it all. He had wished to keep me safe after all. Was there not a sister? Some type of cousin removed to the Vanir throne he could marry for my sake?

'I am king, no longer an heir.'

'And if I don't obey this treaty, what then?'

'If you do not fulfil the treaty then your firstborn must.' It was Kit who answered.

There was an image that came to mind as Kit's words rang in my ears. A child, my firstborn, a little girl with long black hair and wide blue eyes, pink chubby cheeks and a contagious laugh - a dream, a desperate wish of my own I refused to have tainted.

When I looked at Loki his eyes were already on me, brows cinched together as he leant forward, his face clouded with something like disgust. I was not welcomed to his thoughts and felt something like a wall rise between us.

And I knew with that look, that all of my wanting would only ever remain just that.

'I can't believe you wouldn't tell me.' Thor flinched at my words, his eyes cast downward, his hands clasped before himself as if in penance.

My hand reached out to rest upon his as I shifted onto the edge of my seat and gently I squeezed, forgiven but not forgotten. I hadn't even had the stomach to tell Thor it was okay when his eyes widened hopefully as they lifted to greet mine - there was a slight shine to them that hadn't been there earlier.

His large hands grasped my own and squeezed back, a silent but reassuring promise that he was sorry, that he would do better. And because I knew he would and because he was my dad and maybe I had no one else I had to tell him,

'I understand why you didn't.' I told Thor and his eyes dropped again as he gave my hand another tight squeeze.

'You will decide the terms of our courtship.' Kit spoke from beside me. I was grateful for his interruption. 'You will be my queen.'

'She is not for you,' Loki growled at Kit with such ferocity that my hand dropped away from Thor's grasp as he straightened in his seat, hands at the ready-to-call Stormbreaker or Mjolnir.

I shifted back onto the chaise so I could see all three men sitting around me. Loki's hands were resting upon his knees in tight fists, his brows lowered as his eyes bore into Kit who lifted a singular dark brow as if tempting Loki's rage. The corners of his mouth lifted playfully in a pretty smirk that had my stomach fluttering,

'Your affection for your niece is gratuitous, Prince Loki.' Kit even had the gall to turn his focus to me and size me up, cerulean blue eyes looking at me heavy-lidded like he wished to devour me. I wanted him to, my skin heating with the way he was looking at me. 'She is her own woman.'

'She is mine,' Loki hissed before correcting himself at Thor's movement beside him, 'Ours. She will be the Queen of New Asgard and you wish to swoop in and charm her, take your worth for a chance at glory and a crown on your head.'

Not everyone wants to steal our throne. I threw to Loki but was met with silence. I had no idea if those mental walls of his were still in place.

His rage was insistent, I would wait it out and pray Kit had a tolerance for hissy fits.

'You are jealous.' Kit stated and threw his arm over the back of the chaise, Loki's eyes fell onto the bare skin of my shoulder where Kit's fingertips caressed.

I bit back my grin and leant into Kit's touch, allowing myself to enjoy it and the vicious glance Loki threw my way. Two small creases formed between his brows as he addressed Kit like he was insolent, his words sharp and spoken clearly,

'I am simply preserving what is left of our realm.'

'Perhaps you should have done so for Jotunheim.' Kit offered and I flinched at his words, the raw truth to them.

Loki's grin was feral and teasing like he might just unleash his true form. I was half convinced he would just prove how scary he could be.

'What bothers you more, the ice in my blood or that I am heir to two thrones?' he asked Kit.

The air crackled as Thor spoke, 'Loki, that's enough.'

Loki did little to acknowledge Thor's demand but pressed his lips together in silence, throwing me a glare that made me wonder if he thought I might interject and stand up for him.

I wouldn't. Instead, I had to keep from lifting my middle fingers at him but thought it impolite given the prince at my side. I had to stifle a laugh at the realisation that I didn't hold Loki in the same high regard.

Loki's rage shifted to Kit beside me and where I expected our guest to shift uncomfortably or feel outraged at Loki's lack of manners and our obvious family drama, he looked comfortable amongst it all,

Kit slipped Loki a generous smile but his words were contemptuous,

'I understand what it is to live in a brother's shadow and to claw your way out from the dark, Loki. You and I have more in common than I originally thought.'

Loki scowled at Kit but offered no more harsh words much to my - and no doubt Thor's - delight. I watched as Loki took a long drink from his goblet before staring into the bottom of it with a deep frown. He was acting like an insolent child and I knew I couldn't make it my problem.

Kit's fingers traced small circles upon the bare skin of my shoulder and I shivered at the touch.

'How about a show for our guests?' Thor clapped his hands together and stood and when he did the sky broke apart in a jigsaw of blue and silver lightning as the clouds rattled with thunder and the guests cried out in surprise and laughter.

'What is it you wish to see in the sky, Kit?' Thor asked and gestured toward the balcony facing the ocean where the guests were crowding, 'I like to think of myself as a pistachio of the sky.'

'Picasso, Dad.' I corrected Thor and he shot me a broad grin as Kit untangled himself from me and followed Thor to the dais steps. Thor's arm grasped Kit's shoulder in a friendly and aggressive grip as he forcefully pulled him away to join the other guests.

I figured I was also invited and started toward the stairs but not quickly enough, Loki took his chance and spoke,

'He will be an embarrassment to our family.'

I stopped mid-step at his words, and something shifted in me. Every cruel word he had said was coiled like a living thing inside of my gut. The sky flashed again, and the guests cheered. I refused to face him, throwing my words over my shoulder,

'What family? You aren't a part of this.' I couldn't help myself, I took his bait and instantly regretted it as Loki chuckled, reminding me exactly what he thought of the situation - one big fucking joke.

'Do you truly think that he is what you want?'

I gritted my teeth and though I didn't want to interact with him I also didn't want to run from him. Thor made me promise to stay away from Loki and I had to make it clear I would. I refused to face him and it gave me the courage to say what I needed to say,

'I want to be happy, you aren't a part of that equation.'

Loki was silent as he stood behind me, his presence called to that power beneath my skin and I felt drawn backward, my body aching to collide with his, desperate for his touch that the power inside of me was screaming for its master - no it's equal.

I remained rigid as I stood with my back to him, I knew he was my weakness, I knew that if I faced him - if I had to look into his pretty blue eyes and see how his lips parted as he spoke in that infuriatingly delicious rasp of his when he was displeased -that my promise to Thor would be null and void - at least for the rest of the night.

'And what do you think the odds are that on your wedding night, you end up in my bed?'

Led into the trap I imagined myself knelt on Loki's bed in a white gown, he was naked before me, reaching for my hand, the light caught the golden band on my finger and with a sly smile Loki guided that hand to his cock as I grasped it in my hand and pumped.

'I have made my choice.' I let the fantasy slip away as my hands turned into fists at my side. As I glanced down I could see emerald mist curling around my wrists, my own power seemed to sigh with the caress as it entwined with Loki's own power.

Both of us refused to touch the other, it was another game but this time I would win. Loki was not aware of my promise to Thor, he didn't understand that now with the revelation of the treaty between the Asgardian and Vanir bloodlines, I had more to lose than just my sanity - a chance at my own family and I would never trade that for anything or anyone. Even Loki.

My voice was louder as I spoke again, making sure Loki knew what I was conveying, how I felt about him, that this was a clear rejection, 'I want him.'

'Say it again Evangeline, you might convince yourself of your own words.' Moving past me, Loki made sure to drive his shoulder into my own making me stumble and I watched him disappear into the crowd of guests with the sinking feeling that I should have run after him and told him that I was lying, that I wanted him, that he was the love of my life.

It wouldn't have mattered anyway, he would have only reminded me that I was the bane of his.

Chapter Text

I drew the line at subjecting my future children to this life. There was an ache that swelled inside of me at the thought that choosing to become a mother and having a family would also be taken away from me.

Did that mean if I married Kit, he would inevitably be the father of my children? What about Loki, being mated came down to producing offspring, did it not? What if there was some clause in that fucking prophecy that meant my dreams of one day becoming a mother and having a family were null and void - all because I was meant to be the Djöfull?

I stared out to the dark abyss of the ocean before me, the marble railing in my hands gripped tightly so as not to throw myself over it and sink into the cold depths of the water. I wouldn't, I didn't quite have the nerve or the energy and figured instead of helping me the guests would rather gawk and gossip. Thor and Loki sure as shit wouldn't help me either.

My stomach tightened at the thought of Loki doing anything for me, the sudden realisation that I was lonely struck me hard. Here I was - a princess, daughter of a god and with thousands of years to live before me - the world at my fingertips and I wanted none of it because who the hell did I have to share it with? A father who disappeared to save other realms at the drop of a hat, a mate who decidedly hated me because I was unworthy, a betrothed who was a stranger?

I pressed my lips together as my eyes welled with hot tears and blinked several times, focusing on the delighted cries of the crowd around me and the electric blue lightning that slashed across the sky. Is this what my life was now? Nothing felt real anymore. I sat back watching everything unfold, and could do nothing about it.

My hands twitched, and I peered down to see my power push through my skin, curling around my fingers. As the pink mist settled over the marble it disintegrated, fine dust floating through the air and coating my palms.

'Eva?' My name was uttered gently over the crackle of lightning overhead. My surprise was short-lived as I was drawn from my thoughts - to find Kit standing beside me, his brows drawn in concern.

I grew flustered at the sight of him, the way that the flash of light in the sky above us illuminated him so that it looked like his skin shimmered. I stood a little taller, my hands at my sides, clenching the thin material of my dress as I shifted my eyes away from him to rid myself of my unshed tears, not to have them fall before him.

'I'm not really in the mood for an apology.' I swallowed, the words came out thick.

'What about some grovelling?' Kit answered, and I fought back a smile, a small one. My sour mood wasn't that easily lifted but I figured Kit was a great distraction from my self-pity and oncoming emotional spiral.

'I won't say no.' I told him, still not facing him, still watching the churn of the dark sea before us.

'Would you like me to replace my glamour?'

The offer was generous and intriguing enough that I turned my head. I was expecting a playful smirk or warm chuckle but instead, Kit's brows were drawn together, his arms folded behind his back and his chin angled down.

Something coursed through me to see him standing beside me like that, awaiting my answer, compliant. Submissive almost. I pressed my lips together, met those goddamn dazzling blue eyes and my stomach fluttered when he leant toward me slightly. I could only shake my head in answer.

No.

I liked him like this. It made me sick the longer I looked at him and how handsome he was; he was perfect. Unattainable. He couldn't be mine, couldn't want me? But he didn't have to want me, I was just a birthright.

But hadn't he told me in my room before...

'Do you love me?' The words slipped from my mouth before I realised I was thinking out loud.

Kit's expression changed from worry to confusion and he let out a light chuckle but my sudden withdrawal from him had only caused the moment to turn awkward.

My heart leapt into my throat, what the fuck had I said that for?

'Do you want me to?' Kit shifted closer to me, his hand reaching out toward me, moving some of my hair behind my shoulder. I said nothing, could only stare at Kit as his eyes lowered, as he moved closer to me still, his other hand resting on my waist with the ghost of a touch. I shivered, unresponsive to his question and fucking hell I wanted him to kiss me, to hold me against him as his lips devoured my own.

'Eva.' My name was exhaled on a breath as Kit's fingertips traced the curve of my neck upward, slowly, gently, the pads of his fingers pressing firmly against my jaw so that I was looking up at him, our gazes catching.

There was nothing I could hear but the pounding of my heart in my ears, I could scarcely breathe as Kit looked at me and I found myself willing to forget everything that had happened, the lies and misgivings because of how he was looking at me. Like I was everything.

Here before me stood a literal prince charming and he wanted me, wanted to give himself to me and my body hummed with anticipation, the magic beneath my skin drew tight and I felt like I might faint, my head growing heavy, but all I could think was if he was going to kiss me.

A third-born son?

Loki's voice was a strike of lightning in my mind and his voice was so loud and clear that I jolted backward from Kit to throw a look out to the sea of guests, half-expecting Loki to be watching me - us - scowling. But as my eyes scanned the crowd, I could see nothing but enamoured guests looking at the sky splitting above them in flashes of coloured lightning.

'Eva?'

'It was the lightning.' I told him and offered him a small smile, my downcast eyes noticed the marble dust on my black dress and I brushed it off. Kit was polite enough not to question me any further and took his place beside me, watching the lightning cast above us and the sea beyond.

We stood there in silence for several moments and our gazes caught several times as we peered at one another like children only to quickly look away.

'Do you want to be left alone?' Kit asked me, his gaze still directed at Thor's show that had bled from blue to purple as it crackled closer above the navy water.

'I don't think I can get rid of my foul mood,' I told Kit, 'Honestly, I don't think I've been in a good mood since arriving here.'

Kit leaned forward, his forearms resting on the marble railing right next to the missing pieces I disintegrated, his head tilted toward me, offering a listening ear. His blue eyes pressed into me and his brows raised slightly and I blurted it all out.

'I didn't ask for all this shit, the throne or the power or the responsibility. I just wanted something simple, something safe. I don't think I can become who I'm meant to be because that means throwing away who I am now, my life before, the people in it. I'm losing pieces of myself and becoming something else that doesn't quite fit. I want the life I didn't get. I'm terrified of the one waiting for me.'

Suddenly, I was breathless and looking at Kit wide-eyed, waiting for him to tell me I'd be okay, that it was all in my head, that I'd been through a lot, but he only nodded his head and spoke in a low voice,

'I don't mean to sound patronising, but I understand.'

Third in line to the throne. Loki's voice was like a clap of thunder in my tired mind.

Just like you? I didn't hesitate to retort. I was met with stony silence.

'You were raised for this life,' I told Kit and my voice came out harsher than I wished it to. I blamed that on the fact I was holding a begrudged conversation with Loki in my head.

I am a Crown Prince. There was agitation in Loki's answer, I was surprised he took my bait.

Then piss off and go and rule over your cold fucking realm.

What fun would I have there without you, darling?

Kit showed no indignation at my brusqueness and shrugged his shoulders, drawing his gaze back to the sea. The sky was no longer lit, Thor's show had finished and without the light, we were cast in shadows, Kit's brown hair looked ebony and the angles of his face were sharpened. In the dark, there were similarities between him and Loki, I peered harder only to strike away the thought.

Get out of my fucking head. I threw out towards Loki and tried to imagine pushing him away from me, trying to separate our minds and anything else that bonded us to one another.

'I was raised to be a spare, twice over. I was raised to have good manners, great intellect and how to keep company with the right people. That's it. I wasn't taught how to be a swordsman or to govern our kingdom or protect my people. I may have been raised as a prince, Eva, but I exist in that in-between space as you do - they will look to us if all else fails.'

'Do you mean that as a good thing?'

'No.' Kit told me and shook his head, letting loose a deep sigh, 'We are their salvation.'

He did not look at me after he spoke and his words unsettled me. I suppose I thought that Kit would be the one to distract me from my spiralling thoughts about my existence but instead, I was left standing beside him feeling heavy and blinded by his truth - that maybe he didn't want a life with me as much as I assumed, that he was doing what he had to do not what he wanted to do.

A part of me thought to run from him then, to let him be bitter about being a third-born prince and get on with my night. I had a part to play and if I was to convince myself that I was capable of one day being Queen of New Asgard I had to start fucking acting like it. I wouldn't allow myself to slip so easily into my role as Djöfull - but beneath my skin, that power pulsed and pushed and I knew it would be as easy as letting go of a breath for it to be unleashed.

'Kit?'

He straightened when I uttered his name, his eyes fell to my hand resting upon his forearm and I squeezed with light pressure.

'We're going to be happy.' I told him, pressing the words into him, my brows lowered, 'I promise you, we're going to get everything we deserve.'

'Do you truly think so, Eva?' Kit placed his hand over my own, his palms were warm, and his thumb stroked my wrist. He did not look at me but I kept my gaze on his, staring at the shadow of his lashes on his cheeks.

'I'm a goddess. Sort of. I'm sure that I can make a few promises.'

Kit let out a soft laugh and lifted his eyes to meet mine, 'Will you grant me one thing then?'

Captivated by his stare, I leaned in. Kit shifted his hand so that it trailed up my arm, with a featherlight touch until once again, his fingers were drawn up the bare skin of my neck.

The shelter of the night made the moment more intimate as we leaned toward one another, both of Kit's hands grasped my face, my own hands reaching for his waist - to stop him or pull him toward me, I wasn't entirely sure but I knew people were watching now. I could feel the dagger-sharp stare of one person from across the balcony like a physical pain. I ignored it as best as I could.

Kit's beauty was haunting in the dark, he looked like a dark fantasy, his eyes heavy-lidded as he spoke to me, his words a whisper that had my skin rise in goosebumps,

'Grant me the honour of tasting you, here.' he touched my lips with the pad of his thumb, dragging it downward as a gasp of breath left my mouth. My heart hammered in my chest as his eyes darkened at my reaction.

Kit moved closer to me, pushing my body back with his own so that my back was flush against the railing, his hips pressing into mine and the tight feeling of his body against mine caused a reaction from me that I hadn't expected. My hands tightened against his waist in anticipation of his kiss, I was desperate for him to devour me.

Kit must have sensed this as his hand moved from my lips to brush back my hair, exposing the skin on my neck and his head dipped down to press a gentle kiss underneath my ear.

'And here.' his voice was almost a growl, a deep sound that only betrayed his intentions and had my skin hum. I hadn't realised how long it had been since someone had touched me - wanted me.

I felt myself grow wet, my core tightening at the sensation of his tongue against my pulse point. I allowed myself to close my eyes, scarcely worried about the crowd we may have been attracting. Kit took his time as his lips traveled down my neck in barely there kisses, eliciting small and excitable moans from my lips. It must have been enough of a green light for Kit to continue as he shifted his body, his erection pressing into my stomach and one of his hands traveled around to grab my ass and pull me into him, the other grasping my left breast and tugging on my dress to free it. My nipple hardened at the cool air and I let out a gasp as Kit dropped his head,

'And here,' he utttered before taking my nipple into his mouth and sucking hard. My hips jerked, I glanced down to see Kit's crown of dark hair and his hand was then between my legs, easily parting the skirt of my dress so his hand cupped my pussy. If I weren't pressed against him and the railing, I swear I would have fainted.

Kit unlatched from my nipple with a soft pop and groaned into my ear as his fingers traced the seam of my pussy, 'But most of all here, your Highness.'

With a soft gasp, I glanced behind Kit to the crowd gathered on the balcony only to find that their eyes were no longer on the sky; neither were they on us. Thor's show had finished and we were cast in the shadows of the night.

I knew that such indecencies weren't uncommon amongst Asgardians, particularly this late into the night, especially when Thor had no qualms about emptying the contents of the cellar.

Kit must have sensed my hesitation as he pulled back to look at me and gently covered my exposed breast with my dress. The hand that had cupped me rearranged my skirt but he had no intention of moving from me, his hands were planted firmly on my hips as he pressed himself against me so that there was no space between us, I could feel his heartbeat, I could taste his breath as he spoke against my lips,

'Tell me to stop,' Kit nipped at my lips. I couldn't answer him, I hardly had breath in my lungs as he huffed in frustration and grasped the hair at the base of my neck and pulled hard. I winced at the pain but just as quickly revelled in the pleasure it brought with it.

'Tell. Me. To. Stop.' Kit challenged me. His other hand pressed into my hip so hard I was sure it would leave bruises.

'No.' I breathed and his mouth devoured mine.

I'll let him fuck me here. I decided. I want him to.

You'll embarrass yourself. Loki's voice taunted and I ignored it the best I could, though his presence in my mind was sharp and constant like a sudden migraine.

I kissed Kit back as his knee pressed against my thighs to push them apart, delicious pressure was placed against my pussy and involuntarily I bucked my hips as he pulled on my hair harder, capturing my bottom lip and biting, hard.

I let out a gasp that quickly turned into a moan as Kit chuckled and began to kiss me gently, his tongue moving over my lower lip and I groaned my frustration, trying to pull him in for a deeper kiss but he didn't allow me.

'I don't want to do this.' Kit told me as he untangled himself from me and my cheeks burned in embarrassment at how easily I had given into him, how easily he had rejected me.

Told you so.

I ignored the remark from Loki and started for the palace but Kit stopped me.

'No, Eva. I meant I don't want to do this here. You're a Queen, my wife for goodness sake.'

I was thankful for the dark so that he couldn't see that my embarrassment was quick to turn to anger. I tried to soften the scowl on my face but he must have noticed as he tilted my chin up so that our eyes were level.

'We shouldn't rush this, I don't want you to think this is all I want you for when I leave tomorrow.'

'You leave tomorrow?' I asked, bewildered.

'In the morning, yes. I'll be back to visit, eventually.'

My stomach dropped; the way Kit said eventually sounded like he wasn't sure when he would be back. How many stipulations were there in this marriage agreement? I felt I was being made a fool of, first there was hiding his identity and then the sudden reveal of our arranged marriage. What next?

I took a step back from him and his hand dropped from my chin. His brows drew together in sympathy and I had to stop myself from running off at that look. I hardly wanted him to feel sorry for me.

But how was this fair? I had just been told I was to marry him and now he was leaving. How would we get to know one another now -without the weight of our titles and the constant reminder of the roles we were being forced to play?

'There isn't a need for us to be married for a long while. Your father is still young and unmarried himself.'

'So, what? We don't need to be married until Thor is older? When exactly is that, in a couple of hundred years, one thousand?'

'The terms have not been discussed. Erik simply sent me here to acknowledge the fulfilment of the oath.'

'You revealed you are a prince the very same day you revealed to me we are engaged. The least you could do is stay to get to know me.' Even as the words left my lips, I noted how bratty I had sounded.

'I am loyal to my king, not yours. I am sorry Eva but I have to go. I have duties and responsibilities that cannot be ignored.'

'What is your punishment if you don't, death?' I tried to refrain from whining any longer and kept my tone light,

'I'm sure you could stay a few extra days, Kit.'

'My brother is somewhat of a tyrant when things don't go his way. Maybe we could discuss this later? Perhaps I could ask Thor to allow you to visit?'

'I don't need permission.'

'No, I suppose you don't. But I would like to guarantee that you make it to Vanaheim safely.'

'It seems like you're suddenly coming up with excuses.' I folded my arms over my chest. I had to hold myself together, refrain from throwing a fucking tantrum at nothing ever going my way. I lifted my eyes from Kit, my eyes drawn over his shoulder where Loki stood amongst the crowd. With a small tilt of his head, his lips lifted into a hint of a smile. I felt my entire body stiffen in rage; how was my unhappiness so humorous to him?

Kit was half-turned from me now, his brows drawn together and there was no longer that dark look of lust in his eyes as he glanced at the crowd to see what had caught my attention before addressing me,

'Eva, maybe we should discuss this later.'

His lips parted slightly like he was going to say more, but he stopped as his eyes dropped to his feet.

I followed his gaze to see a soft pink mist swirling around his boots, a faint colour of my usual power. It snaked up his ankles and upward to his thighs. I swallowed down my pride and commanded my power back.

'Fine.'

Kit waited a beat, watching as my power disappeared before him before he moved toward me. I could still tell his steps were careful. He pressed a soft kiss to my cheek, lips lingering near my ear,

'I want to finish this the right way. I'll find you later.' Kit pulled back, and his lips were pulled up in a devilish smirk that had my anger melt away before he departed. I hoped that Kit's farewell left me with a good taste in my mouth, literally.

I watched as Kit disappeared and nervously scanned the crowd to find Loki, but he was gone. I was sure it was a small blessing and figured he would find me soon enough or he would open that channel up between our minds and toy with me some more. I knew that I would need some type of defence to keep him at bay - I wasn't even certain that was the full extent of our bond - I couldn't allow myself to be enraged by him further.

With little else for the night to offer besides an absurd amount of liquor and brooding, I headed through the crowd, eager to escape to my bedroom and be alone. With Kit leaving, I had nothing to look forward to. I was here as a placeholder and perhaps to abate Thor's loneliness.

My pace slowed as the guests shifted to make way for me. I offered a tight, polite smile towards them but was met with raised brows and whispers behind my back as I passed. Out of all of the shit that had happened tonight, it was the rudeness - disapproval rather - of the guests, my people that had my eyes burning with unshed tears.

Who was I meant to be, what mask would I have to wear, what hurdles would I have to jump through for their acceptance, my father's, Kit's, Loki's - no. I stopped my train of thought at any mention of him.

Before me stood a woman with brown hair so dark it was almost black and stunning dark eyes. She looked more like a queen than I ever could, as she dropped her head slightly before speaking,

'If you would please allow me to show you the way to your room, your Highness.'

'Please.' I breathed in relief.

'Follow me.'

I did as she commanded, following her as she maneuvered through the increasingly drunk and rowdy crowd with graceful speed, her height making it easy for me to follow. Her skin was bronzed, and her dark hair fell in perfect ringlets down her back. Her dress was exquisite, deep wine with gold detailing, the skirt of her dress fell in soft waves behind her. No one was paying attention to her, and I couldn't understand why. Surely she had to have been someone of importance - clearly a citizen of Old Asgard?

Within a few short moments, I was led behind a column and her steps halted. She whirled to face me in a move that whipped her skirts around to reveal midnight blue fabric between the pleats of her red skirt.

'You're welcome, your Highness.' She gestured to the staircase to her right.

'How did you know about that?' I was hopeful she might stay and befriend me. Was that not her motive? She was willing to help when no one else had, she had even remained polite.

'This palace is an exact duplicate of the old Asgardian Palace. The design, the secret passages, even all of the furnishings are the same. It is as it had been when I held court with Frigga. However, I have noted that you are staying on the thirteenth floor in a guest bedroom and not the third floor, where the heirs living quarters are. Why is that?'

'You knew Frigga?' I stepped toward her in excitement at the mention of my grandmother, the rest of her words lost to me.

'We were in the same circle.' She blinked at me, her tone conveying her annoyance like I had been asking the wrong question, or rather I hadn't answered hers.

'You don't hold court.' It was not a question.

'I didn't think that was a thing?'

'If you want to be liked around here, you should.'

'I don't want to be liked.' I snapped.

There was no reaction from her, if she had been in Frigga's circle, I'm sure that those ladies would have used their words wisely and never let their emotions rule them. I tried to refrain from jumping down her throat again.

We stood there for several moments just looking at one another. She spoke before I did, leaning in toward me with a small smirk that accentuated a dimple on her left cheek,

'You would be amazed at the things people are willing to share when they wish to be liked by you, your Highness.'

'Secrets?'

'And history. It is a weapon, gossip, and spilled truths. Your grandmother was a game master, her court the pieces. If you expect to be the Queen, you must know the game of the court.'

'Would I make a good queen?'

'No.' There was no hesitation in her answer, no apology in her expression as she stared at me with her pretty dark eyes.

I smiled at her answer, 'Why?'

'You don't want it. That means you don't want the responsibility, you don't wish to be accountable for more than yourself. You're selfish. You won't make a good queen.'

Despite her accuracy, it was shocking to hear the words aloud. But I thought back to seeing Frigga in that field; I thought back to how she held herself, the quiet authority she wielded. I wanted to be that powerful without being feared, without having to hurt anyone.

I clenched my fists at my sides. I wouldn't allow Frigga's prophecy or the worst of my fates to come true. I wouldn't destroy worlds, and I wouldn't allow myself to be the villain.

'What's your name?' I asked the woman before me.

'Esra Styrmir.' She said with her chin held high.

'I'm appointing you as my grand advisor, Esra.'

Esra was silent, her brows drawing together as she spoke, 'Your Highness, there is no such title.'

'There is now.' I told her and started for the stairs.