Archive of Our Own ^beta

Kuboyasu is quite good at remembering things but if there is one thing that he remembers the most, it's the first form of physical contact he had with Kaidou. Surprisingly, it wasn't a fight, which tends to be more memorable to him.

A handshake.

A simple handshake between him and Kaidou.

It was quite an ordinary day, where he was busy trying to adjust to his 'goodie goodie' character. Wearing fake glasses did make him appear more handsome but he hates to admit that they were quite annoying to wear, particularly when he has to clean them to see better. Maybe he should lie and say he switched to contact lenses. Lessens the hassle. And don't get him started on the hair!

But then he'd walked onto a sight that broke the quiet persona.

Pinned against the wall with a hand clutched around his neck was a boy that he was certain was in his class. From his angle, the boy was helpless, clenching his teeth and mustering the courage to mask whatever emotions he truly felt with a brave face. It was his eyes that gave it away, the piercing crimson shrunken with fear. Whatever the circumstances were that made those hooligans terrify the common school kid so much lacked sense, until Kuboyasu had recognised them as none other than the bastards who were trying to provoke him ever since he left his thug life!

Whether it was the goodness of his own heart or the rage that blinds him, he'd managed to slug one guy square in the jaw, and kick the other in the gut, so hard that it sent him launching back a few metres, his head colliding into the concrete wall. Everyone fled.

Except for Kaidou, who stared in wonder because his saviour, who'd quite frankly appeared out of nowhere, had done exactly as he wanted to do himself - intimidate the oppressors and make them run. This, being Kuboyasu, was a man oozing with power, and there certainly wasn't a doubt. And, though he should have felt intimidated too, Kaidou could only manage gratefulness.

It was a memory that Kuboyasu recalls vividly, where Kaidou repeatedly bowed before him in thanks, and he bashfully scratched the back of his head, his stomach twisting with an unfamiliar feeling, like the fluttering of a butterfly's wings. It was tingly but he'd mistook it for a sudden urge to puke. Fortunately, nothing as such came from his mouth. Kaidou ended his mumbles of praise and admiration, instead sticking his hand out with a friendly smile and slightly-flushed cheeks.

"Kaidou!" he exclaimed in introduction, beckoning Kuboyasu to shake the hand.

Kuboyasu certainly couldn't turn that down!

"Kuboyasu," he responded with a tone akin to that of which the blue-haired boy had used.

He noticed how the hand was wrapped tightly in red bandages, the ends frayed with overuse. Or for style, Kuboyasu didn't really know. What were normal high schoolers normally into? There was no doubt that they would be rough to touch, with all kinds of dirt and sand stuck in them, but what surprised him was how small the hands really were. Kaidou actually had... dainty, little hands!

The brief analysis was over as quickly as it had started and Kuboyasu made the grab first, slipping his fingers smoothly around Kaidou's in a firm handshake, his assumptions remaining perfect as always. For a former member of an illegal biker gang, Kuboyasu did tend to examine situations a little before acting brashly but, this time, he was doing the complete opposite. A simple handshake, with a simple boy, in a simple manor. No deals or pacts or double crosses.

Just a handshake.

And he noted the feel of the bandages, how despite being tightly wound around his hands, they were surprisingly loose, and he could feel them ruffle slightly until-

He felt it.

Silk.

Or he swore it was silk, or cashmere, or some rich material hidden beneath.

There was no way that was skin! It was far too soft, like fresh cream, melting under his simple touch! It was a whole other dimension, ethereal and completely new. It shocked Kuboyasu, like a bolt of lightning, striking through his spine and making his body shudder as if the temperature were fluctuating greatly, a wave of blistering heat crashing into him before the cold freezes to his bone.

And yet, somehow, his face remained the same, unreadable and stoic one. A face that Kaidou barely attempted to understand because, to him, that was a simple handshake.

But not to Kuboyasu! Hell, it was like his first taste of heaven, a new exotic flavour that had already had him hooked. His hand had retracted but still - four long months later and he still dreams of it. Of the barest contacts of skin, and how smooth it was. A polished marble surface. Perhaps Kaidou were actually a marble figurine, a statue of purity that should be worshipped. But, then again, his skin was so pliant and flexible!

Maybe this was a crush? Sure, he'd always considered making his first love his wife, but what if it were a boy? Had he fallen for Kaidou? Could he still make him his wife?

He'd still allow his imagination to roam free, particularly during the dry and dull part of class that he never pays attention to because he feels like he'd already been through them a hundred times before. The fantasies revolve around Kaidou, of course, like Kuboyasu exploring every inch of his skin. Would his cheeks be just as soft, or even softer? What about his legs, or arms? Or his chest, which he knew for a fact was petite but also muscular? Recently, thoughts have drifted to his fluffy hair, and whether it was the same texture of its appearance.

But it's always with the hands. How they hold a pencil, or the handrail on a train, or how they card through his hair when he feels cool, or through his cloths when he removes the cobwebs in the new secret hideout the two were renovating. How would they wrap around his hand, the little fingers slotting between the gaping gaps of his own, the plush palm pressing right against his own. Sometimes how'd they look with a little sliver of gold twirled around his ring finger. In fact, Kuboyasu had tried - and had most definitely failed - to estimate Kaidou's ring size. Perhaps he should think about the proposal after he confesses his bubbling feelings to Kaidou.

Had that fluctuating, crazy wave of warmth and cold stopped after their contact? Absolutely not! Now, all it takes is a stare into those ruby-red eyes or that precious smile and his entire body heats up, heart beating at an erratic pace. How could Kaidou possibly get away with stealing his lungs? Surely he felt the same way about Kuboyasu!

Today, it was Kuboyasu's first sleepover with Kaidou. He watched the sky blunette like a hawk, hoping to catch the latter flushing red or stutter abnormally or show some kind of sign like Kuboyasu did. To his disappointment, Kaidou remained completely comfortable, talking about everything and nothing whilst watching some stupid TV show. It was just after the episode had finished that Kaidou got up, grabbing a towel and a change of clothes and alerting Kuboyasu that he was going to shower. That gave time for Kuboyasu to scheme.

He's lost for ideas though. How was he supposed to pursue a guy he had never done anything beyond shaking hands with? Should he initiate more contact or respect the distance they have between them? Maybe the better plan would be him asking, but even then it would be creepy!

This was a spiralling dilemma for Kuboyasu. How on earth should he approach his first move?

Long moments later, the beacon comes through the door, dressed in loose, fashionably-dishevelled pyjamas and-

No bandages?

Kuboyasu nearly gawks, his eyes widening. Lo, the crimson bandages were in his left hand, grazing the floor. He hadn't put them on yet.

And if that wasn't a green light for Kuboyasu, he wouldn't know what was.

His eyes barely meet the matted hair that Kaidou stupidly dries with one towelled hand, instead at the moon-white skin around his thin fingers, or the slim wrists that give way to little arms. He really was tiny compared to Kuboyasu. Only 5'2, but somehow smaller.

Driven by pure willpower, he rises to his feet, storming towards the innocent blunette.

"Kuboyasu? What's-"

Kaidou visible flinches as a hand melds with his own, almost too perfectly, his words cut off. Both boys shudder, literal sparks flying through their bloodstream that makes their hearts beat faster and their lungs feel heavier.

To Kuboyasu, it was just as silky as he imagined, and their fingers lace together if only for him to stroke the soft skin at the back. Absolute awe and fascination, his face heating up at how delicate and precious the moment was. He was actually holding Kaidou's hand! And Kaidou...

Was uncomfortable, the back of his neck an obvious scarlet and his breathing chaotic, facing away from Kuboyasu, perhaps to not allow him to gawk at his expression. Everything about his body language told Kuboyasu that he wanted to run away, or that he didn't want to be in that situation.

But the hand in his isn't yanked away.

And if that wasn't enough of an affirmation, then the hand squeezing back ever so slightly was. 

Did Kaidou... also long for this?

Kuboyasu again takes the initiative and leads them both to the bed, because he could tell Kaidou's legs were about to give out with how crazily they were shaking, and his own knees were almost buckling. So they sit at the bed's edge, Kuboyasu continuing to hold the plush object to his chest, now using both of his hands to touch the material. A part of him thought he was crazy for being so forward, but another thought that this was perfect. This very moment, he felt like he wasn't pushing a lot of relationship-threatening boundaries, and that Kaidou was just as comfortable, despite him sitting as stiff as a stick on a soft bed.

And his mind trails. On cupping that chubby face, because he was certain those rounded cheeks were just as smooth and squishy as his hands. Perhaps feeling further up his arm, like the thin skin around his wrist, or the goosebumps along the back. Most importantly, those lips. He wanted to touch them.

He wanted to... kiss them.

But he'd have to wait a bit longer. Whilst he'd already skipped ahead to ring sizes for the proposal, he also wanted to take this at a slow pace and enjoy each moment a little longer.

Or just because he's nervous.

"K... K-Kuboyasu I... n-need to put m-my bandages on a-and stuff... hah! You know?"

If it weren't obvious before, Kaidou's voice gave away how embarrassing and new this all is to him. That also made things a little easier to Kuboyasu.

Facing away from the blunette, he lets go, the silk slipping out between his hands.

"Y-You have such n-nice hands," he mumbles under his breath, refusing to look as Kaidou starts winding the bandages around his fingers, a little scruffily. The least he could do, after spooking the boy earlier, is to provide some assistance. "C-Can I help you?" he bashfully offers, and Kaidou bashfully agrees, passing over the torn strips.

Kuboyasu has many years of experience with bandaging up wounds and sprains, particularly when under pressure and a member of his biker gang had a life-threatening injury. Fortunately, the same can be applied for when he wraps bandages around his crush's smooth hands, crackles and warm kisses pressing against his skin with each contact. This was surely a plague, knotting his insides and making him feel euphoric. Like he could run for miles! But it also made him feel tiny, and that he wanted to curl into a little ball and melt. Like a cocoon, or a pillow fort that you hide under. A secret den. A comfort place.

Maybe that's what those hands were to him, and why they fascinate him so much. They were his comfort place.

It kind of made him upset that he had to bandage them back up. The softness was going back into hiding, remaining undercover until it's next mission. Surprisingly, the next mission was two days later, when Kaidou came in to school with...

One bandaged hand.

The other remained in his pocket, and he tried to look natural as he walked through the door, but the slight straightness of his spine and the blush crawling across his cheeks was enough to spill the truth.

It only gets better when Kaidou sits and, as the two are closer to the corner of the classroom, no one notices his bare hand reach back to hold Kuboyasu's, their faces flushed with giddy smiles.

No one seemed to bother them for the rest of the day.