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1. i’m not going home alone ('cause i don't do too well on my own) by turntechstified (clonetrobed)

   Fandoms: Homestuck  

   • Explicit
   • Choose Not To Use Archive Warnings
   • M/M
   • Work in Progress

   09 Jul 2025

   Tags

   • Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
   • Jake English/Dirk Strider
   • Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas
   • Minor or Background Relationship(s)
   • (listed in beginning notes so as to not clutter the tags)
   • Dirk Strider
   • Dave Strider
   • Jake English
   • Karkat Vantas
   • Background & Cameo Characters
   • Growing Up
   • Family Dynamics
   • Brotherly Love
   • Getting Together
   • Friends to Lovers
   • Enemies to Friends to Lovers
   • Mentions of past child abuse
   • mentions of drug and alcohol abuse
   • mentions of anxiety and depression
   • Internalized Homophobia
   • this is not as dark as it seems honest
   • Coming Out
   • Coming of Age
   • Alternate Universe - No Sburb/Sgrub Sessions
   • Humanstuck
   • (kind of)
   • so the trolls are actually descended troll-human hybrids
   • physically human passing but culturally trollish
   • this really made sense when i planned it out in my head i swear
   • Age Gap Between Adults
   • mature rating is for dirkjake only
   • dave n kat are underage for most of this fic and will be keeping it pg-13
   • POV Multiple
   • POV Alternating
   • explicit content in ch 21 consult chapter notes for more detail

   Summary

   Your name is DIRK STRIDER and you are THIRTEEN YEARS OLD. You are currently seated in perhaps the last place you expected to end up this evening, a semi-private LABOR AND DELIVERY ROOM in the maternity wing of your local hospital. Beneath your legs is an uncomfortable vinyl armchair, and on top of them is a small BLANKETED BUNDLE. This bundle contains a warm, squirmy little neonatal human who just so happens to be your brand-new BABY BROTHER. What will you do?

    

   ---

   AKA: a story about Dave and Dirk just trying their best.

   Language:

   English

   Words:

   73,822

   Chapters:

   21/?

   Collections:

   2

   Comments:

   277

   Kudos:

   372

   Bookmarks:

   59

   Hits:

   7,742