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Chapter Text

The tavern was full tonight. Shouts and laughter permeated the run-down joint. People gathered to drink and gossip over whatever news they had. At one of the tables sat a group of men doing such a thing.

“Did you hear the news about old man Wei’s garden?”

“No, what happened?”

The man raised his eyebrows and explained, “Some monster snuck into it and ate up all of his cabbage! Apparently, the thing had the body of a dog and the face of a lizard!”

Laughter rang out among the table, hoots and hollers in amusement and pity for the old man.

Another man spoke after the laughter subsided, his older stern face scrunched up in thought, “Damn beasts, that’s the business of cultivators, the rest of us-” he gestures to his tablemates “-shouldn’t have to deal with that trash.”

People grunted and huffed in agreement.

Someone spoke up, “Ahh they’re too busy for us normal people, in fact, last I heard the cultivation world is dealing with their own immortal drama.”

More people laughed at that, ah yes the cultivators were having a rough time of it.

“Wait what drama?” asks a younger man, his eyes wide and confused.

“Oh you haven’t heard?” asks the stern-faced man, the boy shakes his head in confusion. The man smirked at his ignorance and sat further back to explain.

“Well, it's rumored that the Huan Hua Palace master has mysteriously disappeared and been replaced by some new upstart. And Cang Qiong is still scrambling with what to do now that the Lord of Qing Jing Peak is dead. Some say tensions are mounting between the two sects, especially with the missing body of that peak lord”

The table goes quiet as they think over the words. The cultivation world is in chaos, their leadership desperately attempting to right the order of power. What a startling picture, such lofty immortals scrambling about.

Someone takes a drink before speaking, “Damn, no wonder they couldn’t help out old man Wei”

Laughter rings out again and the men go back to their drinking and talking. Ahh yes, the problems of immortals, such fun gossip. What will they do next?

Damn, Shen Qingqiu thought, after dying twice he really thought the afterlife would be nicer. He hadn’t expected it to be so cold and damp, and wow why does his body ache if he’s dead? He doesn’t have a body so what’s up with that?

As he ponders his philosophical questions he slowly regains his senses. He can feel lethargy in his limbs and his eyes ache as he attempts to open them. After a few minutes of struggling, Shen Qingqiu is able to open them and take in his surroundings. Oh shit, he’s not dead. Unless the afterlife is a decrepit alleyway that smells strongly of piss. Well then guess Shen Qingqiu is alive, so fun. But seriously what the fuck is happening? All he remembers is his (in hindsight) dramatic sacrifice and last words to Binghe. He remembers Binghe’s eyes, gorgeous even with killing intent, the way they widened as he proclaimed his repayment. Shen Qingqiu feels a tug on his heart, it aches and leaves him feeling raw. But yeah he should be dead, or in his backup body. Said backup body should also be several feet underground, a thing he is most definitely not.

Well then, time to figure out what fuck up god has forced on Shen Qingqiu today. He summons all the strength in his body to move and realizes something he most definitely overlooked. His body is different, not like his first body swap where he gained a few inches of height and better eyebrows. No, it seems as though he’s not in a human body at all. Shen Qingqiu stands on his four legs and realizes at some point in his life he fucked up so badly that the gods vowed to screw him over. First he had been born a weak sickly nerd, then a doomed human stick, and finally he’s a fucking animal!

Shen Qingqiu is pissed. But also extremely curious. He remembers this was a fairly common trope in some of his favorite novels, one of the characters turns into a cutesy little puppy and love blossoms between two unlikely people! Misunderstandings are cleared up and communication happens, then they transform and get married and all is well! But that trope was reserved for cutesy little love stories not hardcore stallion novels like Proud Immortal Demon Way! Well whatever someone screwed up and now Shen Qingqiu’s an animal, whatever he’ll figure it out.

With that thought he finally begins walking, leaving the alleyway. He sees a puddle (he does not want to think about what liquid it might be) and walks over to it, hoping to discern what nasty creature he might be. Maybe he got turned into a rat or some demon creature, ahh yes that would be quite fitting.

He looks into the puddle to see a white cat gazing back at him. Fluffy white fur covers its body and its vibrant green eyes stare at him in shock. Numbly Shen Qingqiu realizes he has in fact been turned into a kitten. Well at least Luo Binghe might not torture him since he’s both adorbale and fully helpless. What a demotion from an esteemed peak lord, well at least he’s cuter now. Shen Qingqiu had never had a cat, his allergies were too severe, but he had always wanted one; they just looked so cute with their big eyes and furry little bodies. But he had never thought he would be a cat!

He attempts to interrogate the system, but it does not respond to him. Huh that’s weird. Maybe he’s free, sure the life of a cat is less than ideal but it’s better than that of a doomed scum villain.
After a few more minutes of assessing his appearance (wow his cat body is really quite cute!) he starts to walk around. Though a bit hesitant to be seen in public, Shen Qingqiu forces back his fear and makes himself walk forward. He can see he’s in a fairly populated city, and he feels memories pulling at his head. He recognizes the style of architecture and some of the buildings seem familiar to him. Suddenly it hits him, he’s in Jinlan City. That’s good, he’s at least a bit familiar with the terrain and hopefully he’ll be able to find a familiar face and sort out this whole mess. His best bet is going back to Cang Qiong, he can find Mu-shidi and hopefully he’ll be able to figure out what to do.

Shen Qingqiu continues walking, eventually finding his way to a market with vendors and patrons crowding the streets. The air is alive with laughter and conversation, he can see people bargaining and running about. He walks past a food stall, smelling the savory aroma of cooked fish. He is entranced by the delicious scent and stops at the stall to simply take the smell in, how long has it been since he’s eaten? Well he has been dead for a bit, but even before that he hadn’t been enjoying food. Not since - Not since Binghe. He feels that same pull at his heart.

Suddenly Shen Qingqiu feels a kick to his side, next thing he knows he’s laid out on the ground. Ouch. Apparently while he was reminiscing someone took notice of the stray cat in front of the food stall and decided he needed to leave. A man was standing over him, screaming and shouting at him and holding a large stick - as if preparing to swat it at him. Please have mercy, mister! Shen Qingqiu isn’t used to this whole cat thing yet. To avoid a pitiful death as a cat, Shen Qingqiu flees the scene, running quickly from the market. As he runs he realizes he might be a little too fast for a normal cat, the people and surroundings he passes blur in his eye, and the kick he received doesn’t even hurt. He must not be a normal cat or maybe some of his powers transferred over from his old body. Either way he won’t complain. He eventually burrows away into the next alley he can find, hoping to avoid any more nasty people.

Wow humans are so mean to cats. That just won’t do, if Shen Qingqiu has any hope of surviving he needs to find an ally quickly. He can’t exactly protect himself, hell he can’t even open a door (he misses his thumbs). He starts to burrow into some trash at the back of the alley, trying to comfort himself as he freaks out; the reality of being a cat is very disappointing. He misses his peak with his bamboo house and his cute disciples. He misses the clean air and the grounding scent of nature, the verdant green that surrounded him. He misses his silky robes and soft bed, the aromatic scent of his hair oil which permeated his living space. He misses the shy sweet smiles and kind eyes of his Bing-

Shen Qingqiu goes flying across the alley. His furry body sores and makes impact with a hard wall. Did he just get punted!? He looks to the source of the kick he just received, seeing a group of teenage boys. The one that kicked him, the leader, smirks down at his crumpled form as the rest chuckles.

“Wow boss, that was awesome!” one of them remarks, the rest murmur in agreement.

What’s so awesome about bullying a poor defenseless kitten!? It’s not exactly a fair fight, god these low IQ cannon-fodder, idiots!! Just leave this poor kitten alone to wallow in his nostalgia. Shen Qingqiu meows in distress, a sharp pathetic noise that seems to evoke antagonism rather than pity. The boys get closer and crowd into his crumpled form.

“How pathetic, a street cat in an alleyway! Filth, just hanging around my city, spreading disease, what should we do about that boys?” the boss questions, his eyebrows lifted as if mocking the cat.

Bro what? Like he’s a cat, what’s with the villain monologue, do you think he understands you? Do you do this with every cat you murder, just hoping that one day you’ll come across a cat fluent in language? In which case congrats bro today's your lucky day. Shen Qingqiu resigns himself to his fate, he’s about to be killed by an absolute moron. At least when he thought about Binghe murdering him it would be cool, like the hot powerful emperor repaying the villain of his youth. Emotions would be high and tears would be shed. He would avenge himself and finally conquer his greatest villain, Ahh so cool!

One of the boys pulls out a rusty knife, Shen Qingqiu’s going to be shanked. Nice.

“It’s all because of that new palace master, piece of shit leader”, a voice says

“Yeah he can barely run his sect, let alone take care of the city,” someone adds.

“That Luo Binghe is so incompetent our streets are filled with vermin like that,” the leader says as he points at Shen Qingqiu.

Shen Qingqiu thought he knew the breadth of idiocy he was dealing with, yet he was proven wrong. These idiots were criticizing Luo Binghe? And for what, a stray cat being in Jinlan City? He’s the leader of a major cultivation sect not your mayor, he’s not responsible for your weird fixation on stray cats! Luo Binghe is a great sect leader (not that Shen Qingqiu knows what he’s been up to) but he’s sure Binghe is doing his very best, he always was such a dedicated disciple; attending to Shen Qingqui at every waking minute: cooking, cleaning, and even helping him with his obnoxious hair. Binghe didn’t deserve such disrespect from canon-fodder, and with that thought in mind, Shen Qingqiu attacked.

He’s a small cat but he’s dedicated. He latches onto the arm of the leader and digs his claws into the meat of it until he hears a scream. The boy attempts to swat him off, but Shen Qingqiu is not letting up. He sees one of the goons attempt to knife him and quickly dodges, letting go of his victim. Some of the boys attempt to corner him but he scratches at their legs until they flinch away. He squeezes his small body through them and makes a break out of the alley. He’s not fast enough, suddenly a hand grabs his leg and pulls hard. Shen Qingqiu crashes down onto the rough ground, a whimper escapes him as pain radiates from his leg. It bends the wrong way and he assumes it is broken.

“Disgusting animal! We’ll be cleaning the streets of a feral beast!” shouts the leader. He’s clutching his bloody arm with a pained grimace, his face is screwed up unattractively and his eyes seem to be tearing up. Shen Qingqiu feels proud.

The leader comes forward with the knife, a smile creeping onto his face. Freak, is he seriously excited to murder a cat? Apparently so, as the boy readies to stab his pathetic knife into Shen Qingqiu’s cat belly. Dang it not even a mercy killing, no this creep is going to prolong his suffering by letting him bleed out slowly. Gah! So inconvenient, of course Shen Qingqiu had to hide in the same alleyway a cat serial killer frequented.

He feels the knife press against his skin. His pulse thuds and he takes a small breath, preparing for the pain. It never comes. He feels the knife freeze as it presses against his skin, so very close to puncturing some very important things.

“What are you doing?” a deep voice asks.

Shen Qingqiu can not see the stranger, but he sees the boy, how his expression turns scared and his face whitens. Dang this guy must be scary, maybe he has a wicked face tattoo or a cool sword!

“Nothing,” replies the leader, he turns to his friends “Right guys?” The rest of the boys remain silent, their gazes locked on the stranger.

“Hmm are you sure this is nothing?” the stranger lets out an amused chuckled “It looks to me as if you were taking undue authority to euthanize an animal.”

The boy quickly lets go of Shen Qingqiu and pockets his knife. He stands stiffly and replies, “It was just a bit of play, just scaring the thing that’s all.”

Ha! A bit of play, who plays with a knife. Shen Qingqiu glares at the liar, trying to telepathically communicate his anger to the stranger. Suddenly the boy was gone, the stranger moved quickly and slammed him against the hard stone wall. Shen Qingqiu could see his silhouette, though shrouded by the darkness his eyes were able to make out a strong masculine figure. Oh maybe it’s a cultivator, they might be able to help him figure out how to get some help for his situation. Looks like Shen Qingqiu’s luck might be turning around!

The boy starts whimpering as the man’s hold on him tightens, “Don’t lie to me.” His voice is strong and domineering, it undercuts the threat of violence that hangs in the air.

“Ah, oh yes I lied I’m sorry! We were gonna kill it,” the boy whimpers out. He sounds on the verge of tears. The stranger makes a pleased noise before letting the boy go, he drops like a sack of rice and runs over to rejoin his friends. They stand unsurely as if waiting to be dismissed, wow this guy must have a lot of authority, a very esteemed cultivator! Maybe it's Gongyi Xiao and he’s just gone through some form of crazy voice puberty!

The stranger turns, finally facing Shen Qingqiu. Dark amber eyes stare at him, almost glowing with a scarlet color. He knows those eyes, he will always know those eyes.

“Go,” says Luo fucking Binghe.

The boys scamper off quickly. Shen Qingqiu pays them no attention, his gaze is fixed on Binghe. He observes his (disciple? Ex-disciple? Friend? Enemy?) Binghe. Shen Qingqiu still can not walk meaning he can also not flee as Binghe approaches him.

Shen Qingqiu wants to reach out, run his hands down Binghe’s face, feel his warm skin, play with his beautiful curls, grab him by the waist and just feel him whole and healthy. He wants to cry and shout and just talk, for the first time in years he wants to actually talk to his Binghe. But Shen Qingqiu is a cat and can do no such thing. So instead he passes out.

Chapter Text

Shizun had always seemed like a breath of fresh air. His serene smile and assured countenance soothed anxieties. His immaculate robes and hair made him look pristine, unsullied by the degradation of the human world. His verdant green eyes were reminiscent of the bountiful green of his peak, as if he had been born from the soil as a nymph of nature. He was more god than man, something to aspire to, always existing untouchable - unattainable.

Binghe stood in the alleyway, watching as the kitten he had saved passed out. By the looks of its leg, the creature must have been overwhelmed by the pain. But before it passed out, Binghe had made eye contact with it. Wide verdant green meeting amber, he knew those eyes. He would always know those eyes. Yet the gaze was different, feral and fearful, befitting the animal that possessed them. A street cat had nothing in common with the immaculate Lord of Qing Jing peak. Ha! Binghe’s childish optimism was getting the better of him, he thought he had grown out of such delusions.

Luo Binghe walked to the mouth of the alleyway and grabbed the cat, cradling its small white body to his chest. He unsheathed Xin-Mo and cut a portal to his palace, stepping through; the portal closed behind him, leaving an empty alleyway.

Shen Qingqiu felt himself regaining consciousness. His mind flits through his last few memories, his cat transformation and near death experience, and his surprising hero Luo Binghe! Oh fuck.

Just his luck, Shen Qingqiu is forced to confront his ex-disciple as a cat! With his luck Binghe will realize his true identity and feed him to some monster. Perhaps he’ll put him on display, the pitiful new form of his dastardly Shizun. Oh the horror! In despair Shen Qingqiu burrows further into the plush cushion under him. It’s nice and firm with a little bit of bounce, much better than that nasty alleyway, at least Binghe has good hosting skills, this is a great pillow! Shen Qingqiu happily nuzzles into it, basking in the comfort, when he suddenly feels a vibration from the pillow. How strange, it almost feels like-

Shen Qingqiu opens his eyes to see he is in fact not on a pillow, but rather settled on Luo Binghe’s chest. He had been snuggling into Binghe’s chest. Oh god. Binghe seems to be laughing at his antics, meaning he probably isn’t planning on killing him.

Binghe lifts a hand - never mind he’s going to do it - and pets at Shen Qingqiu’s back, lightly brushing over his soft fur. Out of surprise and delight Shen Qingqiu lets out a purr.

Binghe quirks a surprised brow, “Hello little one,” he gestures to Shen Qingqiu’s healed leg. “Your body seems to have taken care of itself.”

Shen Qingqiu was surprised, he had forgotten about his advanced healing. He still didn’t understand why he had such a random smattering of powers but he didn’t want to look a gift horse in the mouth. He flexed the previously injured leg and it responded well, he couldn’t feel any pain. Take that you cat-bullies! Satisfied with his findings, Shen Qingqiu returned his attention to Binghe.

Binghe continued to pet Shen Qingqiu (much to his pleasure) while he spoke, “It must be hard being a street cat. All alone out there, no home, no family, constantly fighting to survive. I understand that, being abandoned-” Binghe pauses as he lifts up Shen Qingqiu by his arms, scrutinizing his small furry body “- I think I will keep you.”

Shen Qingqiu sends a perplexed look to Binghe, cocking his head in a questioning way. Binghe seems further amused by this yet the smile he wears looks too deprecating to Shen Qingqiu. His Binghe should be happy, such a pitiful look is saved for scum like himself.

“My apologies, I know you don’t understand me but I can’t help it. Perhaps I’ve become so lonely that I’m desperate for conversation, even if it’s with one who can not respond,” Binge says ruefully.

Shen Qingqiu meows in protest at Binghe’s self-deprecation. Ah none of that Binghe! You just need a night with one of your wives, surely any lucky lady would love to entertain a man with charm and beauty like Binghe. He must have a few already, though it seemed Ning Yingying was out of the running, there were still plenty of other girls from Huan Hua or demons as well. Buck up Binghe, you don’t need to be alone, plenty of people love and admire you, they would be idiots not too! It’s the basic rule of the universe, the earth orbits the sun and Luo Binghe is loved by all.

Binghe sets him down, onto the bed he had been laying on, and begins walking around his room. He goes to a fine wooden drawer and rifles through it for a moment before finding what he needs and walking back to Shen Qingqiu. In his hands is a mint green ribbon, it looks like the kind he would have worn as Shen Qingqui, tied up in his long dark hair. Binghe fixes the fabric around Shen Qingqiu’s neck, like a collar. Oh god he was being collared by the protagonist, please save this scum villain some face! Binghe finishes and looks over his work, he seems pleased as a small smile graces his pink lips.

“This will ensure people know who you belong to.”

Well that will be nice, no more being mistaken for a stray cat, and hopefully the threat of Binghe’s retaliation will cow any would be cat-killers. Very smart Binghe!

“As for your name, I apologize if you had one before but it seems most fitting to bestow a new one. I will call you Xiao Bai,’ declares Luo Binghe.

Shen Qingqiu blinks up at Binghe. What a cutesy name, little white, it is quite apt as he is both proportionately small and his fur is a snowy white color. As Shen Qingqiu adjusts to his new name (does this mean Xiao Bai is his fursona?) Binghe begins to busy himself, adjusting his clothing properly and dusting off loose cat hairs. Binghe’s poor robe is covered in tiny white hairs, Shen Qingqiu cringes in embarrassment (though some part of him feels a deep satisfaction at leaving his mark on Binghe, making it so others know-

“I need to leave for a moment, I will return soon. Stay here,” Binghe says as he rushes out the door. Shen Qingqiu blinks as it shuts. Someone is in a hurry, Binghe must be busy with running the sect, such a dutiful boy.

Now that he is alone (and assured that Binghe does not know his true identity), Shen Qingqiu is able to properly take in his surroundings. It seems he’s in Luo Binghe’s room, though he wouldn’t be able to tell at first glance. As a sect leader it would be expected he would have a few treasures and some items of value, yet this room was so sparse. The counters were empty of any trinkets or memorabilia, even his bed seemed startlingly plain, just a thin blanket and pillow. It was so unlike the Binghe he knew. The little disciple that used to crowd his room with every knick-knack he could find; gifts from his shizun, trinkets from his travels, and all sorts of things. Binghe had treasured them and displayed them proudly in his little room. Then again, Shen Qingqiu looked around the sterile room, this was not that same disciple. This was the disciple he had pushed into the Abyss, the one he had ignored, and hurt, the one who had watched him die. His white lotus had died that day of the conference, and this was what was left.

Ahh! Too many depressing thoughts! Shen Qingqiu let out a little meow of indignation as he swatted at his own furry head. Get out sad thoughts, now is not the time to wallow!

It’s too depressing to be in this empty room, so Shen Qingqiu resolves himself to leave (sorry Binghe! This master is not an obedient cat). He walks to the door and suddenly realizes he has no idea how to open it, last he checked he still wasn’t in possession of thumbs. As Shen Qingqiu death glares at the door, it suddenly flies open, he barely dodges it and quickly hides behind the bed to spy on the newcomer.

Wait! He recognizes that prissy face! Standing in the doorway of Luo Binghe’s room is the little palace mistress. Her pretty features are screwed up in annoyance and her posture stresses her impatience. She steps forward and looks around the room before calling out, “A-Luo are you here?”

Oh wow, such familiarity not to mention she hadn’t even knocked, her relationship with Binghe must be much improved. In Shen Qingqiu's mind, her sadistic tendencies and abusive mannerisms left little to be desired - but maybe Binghe was into that kind of thing?

When no one calls out to respond to her, the little palace mistress begins to stomp away, closing the door behind her. Shen Qingqiu kicks in his weird spiritual powers and sprints quickly out the door, so quickly he goes unnoticed by the girl. He continues running through the palace, no particular direction or destination in mind. Eventually he passes by a group of disciples, he recognizes those tacky yellow robes, and stops to listen to their gossip. What sue him, it’s been a while since Shen Qingqiu’s gotten to listen to some harmless gossip.

One of the disciples is speaking, she’s young and quite pretty, probably one of Binghe’s future wives, “I just can’t understand him, in all of his wisdom why does he cling so tightly when no hope remains?”

“I agree, if five years will not raise the dead, then perhaps they are meant to stay dead.”

Snickers break out at that statement. Shen Qingqiu is very confused, who's dead? And what’s the deal with five years?

“I find it disturbing, keeping that peak lord’s body around, why not just hand it off to Qing Jing and be done with all the fighting?”

A dead peak lord with significance to Binghe, well who could that be? If Shen Qingqiu had hands he would hit himself. Binghe, please the debts have been repaid, why hang onto the corpse! Is he reveling in his victory, perhaps he’s attempting resurrection to enact his own revenge? And what’s up with this fighting? Who else wants this old man’s body?

The pretty girl disciple speaks again, “He keeps it in such a nice place too, chambers fit more for a spouse, right next to his own room!”

With such a convenient location Shen Qingqiu feels compelled to assess the situation himself. He scampers through the halls, retracing his steps to Binghe’s room. Further down the hall he spots another room with two guards standing at the door. Well how to get around them?

Rather conveniently, one of the guards begins speaking to the other, gesturing with his hands. The other guard shrugs as he gestures for his companion to leave. Ahh how nice, covering for a friend. With the guard gone, Shen Qingqiu is able to use his newfound speed to quickly push his way through the door (yes he did jump to reach the door handle, he’s just that fast). Once the door is closed, Shen Qingqiu takes in his surroundings.

Like the disciple said, the room is fit for a spouse; it is large with a gigantic bed at its center and is extremely well maintained. The bed has a canopy surrounding it, to slightly obscure what lay inside but Shen Qingqiu could definitely make out a human figure lounging. Curious, he walked forward and decided to jump on the bed. The sheets were white, so no one would even notice if he left a few white cat hairs! He could see a pale figure clothed in a nearly translucent inner-robe with long unbound black hair splayed out beneath them. He knew that lithe form, he remembered clothing it, and bathing it, how powerful it felt, the way he could run with those legs and how his arms perfectly held Xiu-Ya. With a sense of morbid fascination, Shen Qingqiu walked closer, approaching his old face. Numbly his eyes retraced the features. He looked so peaceful, as if simply in a deep sleep. Yet the lack of breathing and unnatural white color hinted at the body’s true condition.

How long had it been? He hadn’t thought to consider it, but hadn’t that disciple said five years? For at least five years Shen Qingqui had been dead, yet his body remained nearly pristine, not a hint of decay. This wasn’t the treatment of an enemy, no this was something very different. Strange nonetheless, but not hateful. The level of time and dedication it must take to preserve a corpse, for five years, to keep it healthy and cared for. One thing Shen Qingqiu knew was that Binghe did not possess the ability to hate. Sure, he could dislike people and hold grudges, yet Binghe was driven by love. Even in the original novel, his character was defined by his need to be loved and valued, his wives and empire were his failed attempts to attain esteem. Binghe was a man scarred by the tragedies of his childhood, the lack of warmth, of family, of home; it made him thirst for it all the more. So he took care of people, he cooked, he cleaned, his love language was service. And, Shen Qingqiu surveyed the body before him, this was most definitely an act of service. Binghe was not preserving his old Shizun’s body out of hate, Shen Qingqiu was sure of that, yet he was still unsure of the true reason? Did Binghe truly mean to bring him back to life? For what purpose?

As he thought over this new development, Shen Qingqiu continued to stare at his old face. It really was a nice face, such sharp and elegant features and flawless skin. In another life, Shen Qingqui could have become an idol, he definitely had that pretty boy look. It had been so nice to be so flawlessly attractive, not having to worry about acne or having a bad hair day. Shen Qingqiu felt melancholy, from pretty boy cultivator to helpless kitten, such a strange fate he had. With his little cat paw, Shen Qingqiu reached out to pet his old face. He just wanted a little touch!

Suddenly the door opened, Shen Qingqiu froze and turned his head, his paw still guilty resting on his old face. Luo Binghe was standing and staring at him, he seemed shocked to see the little intruder before noticing his proximity to the body. His eyes narrowed at the paw making contact with his former face, suddenly his entire frame screamed aggression. His eyes narrowed as he ran forward. Shen Qingqiu did not have a death wish and quickly jumped away. Binghe ignored his fleeing form and as he quickly collapsed next to the body, hunkering over it as if to protect it.

“DO NOT TOUCH HIM!” Binghe shouted, rage coating his words.

Binghe had immediately begun attending to the body, searching it for scratch marks or bruising. His movements were panicked and he began muttering apologies to the corpse, as if it could understand him. The energy in the room was almost demonic. Shen Qingqiu turned his gaze to Binghe, he could see his demonic mark glowing brightly. Binghe’s behavior showed he was unstable, and Shen Qingqiu did not want to risk invoking the wrath of a Heavenly Demon, so he quickly ran out of the room leaving Binghe alone to calm down with the corpse.

Shen Qingqiu is lost. It turns out Huan Hua Palace is pretty big, and as a cat he is rather small. And it’s not like he has a destination in mind, he just really needed to get away from the pissed off Binghe, he didn’t think Binghe would stoop so low to kill a cat but he wasn’t willing to risk anything. So after running through the halls for a few minutes, Shen v ofcourse ends up lost.

He stopped running at this point and began just leisurely walking. Some disciples have given him odd looks or attempted to pet him, but once they caught sight of the collar, they quickly scurried away. That’s right, be afraid! The wrath of Luo Binghe is fearsome! Though perhaps Binghe will revoke his claim of Shen Qingqiu after the stunt he just pulled. At that thought, Shen YQingqiuan felt a pull at his heart. If only Binghe knew the master he was defending was actually the one he had attacked! How frustrating!

As Shen Qingqiu bemoans his misfortune, he loses focus and accidentally bumps into someone, his head crashing right into their robes. Surprised, Shen Qingqiu freezes before shaking off his stupor and extracating himself.

“Why is there a cat here?” says a very familiar voice.

Shen Qingqiu looks up, he would recognize that round face and frizzy head of hair any day. Shang Qinghua stares back at the intense gaze of the cat, confusion evident on his face. Suddenly the cat jumps, latching onto Qinghua’s leg while screaming bloody murder.

“What the fuck!” Qinghua shouts as he’s attacked by a fluff of white. He tries to shake the thing off but it holds on. The hall is empty so Qinghua is at least not being publicly shamed by this. After a few minutes of struggle, Qinghua somehow ends up flat on his ass, the cat standing on his chest like a throne. It gives off a regal energy, with its immaculate white fur and piercing green eyes. Qinghua has only known one person with a similar energy, a person he thought long dead. He stares at the smug cat, it would be strange but he had seen weirder things happen.

With wide eyes, the man stutters out, “Cucumber-bro?”

A violent gleam enters the cat’s eyes, he suddenly pounces on Qinghua. He takes that as a yes.

Chapter Text

The body he holds is cold, the skin is clammy and pale. It had always been pale, a soft off-white color that neither burned nor tanned. Ethereal, untouched by elements. But sometimes that whiteness would change, flush with blood high atop regal cheeks and brush ears hidden by black locks. It would be accompanied by a soft gaze, a ruffling of curly hair. One could call it affection.

The body he holds has no such thing. The blood sits, pools, it will not move. That gaze, that smile, both are locked behind the shroud of death. Taken from Binghe by the wickedness of his own nature, karma some could call it. If Binghe could take the role of a believer again, he might agree.

The body is unscathed, no careless scratches or bruising to be seen. The cat, it had been there, inquisitive emerald eyes intensely focused on the room’s sole occupant. A small thing, so very small, and yet - in that moment - Binghe had felt a sense of panic measurable to his emotional state five years ago, burning and cold simultaneously assaulted his being, a mine of fire and ice and soo much fear. I can not lose him again.

One act of kindness, and suddenly his foundation was shaken, kindness seemed an almost avarice to his existence. The only ones who had been kind to Binghe were long gone, one buried in an unmarked grave and the other turned into a martyr. He held the lifeless hand, his larger fingers entangling the daintier ones. Shizun had always had such scholarly hands, thin but strong, capable of wielding both brush and sword. Warm hands would guide Binghe’s own, correcting his form, straightening his posture - their grip was grounding, a peaceful affection. Shizun would tease, joke with Binghe when he purposefully flubbed a task, ‘perhaps my disciple would be better suited for An Ding peak,’ Binghe would send a betrayed expression and Shizun would chuckle, a warm and throaty noise. Binghe’s grip tightened. Oh how he longed to hear that laugh, he would tear apart the realms for just taste of that dulcet sound, he was strong, the strongest, he would best them all, make them bleed to give him back his Shizun, bodies would litter the ground with the scent of iron perverting the air, they would see-

A snapping sound rang throughout the room.

Binghe looked down to see the scholarly hands in his grip bruised - the wrist was limp and darkening. He immediately gasped, a soft noise, and quickly kneeled as he cycled healing qi into the appendage. He would fix Shizun, he could, Binghe is sorry, Binghe did not mean it, please shizun-

Binghe sobbed, a sad and vindictive sound. He had been worried about that kitten, he should have remembered - the only one truly adept at hurting his Shizun was himself. Binghe was the true beast, he had been all along, a kitten -

Wait - Binghe looks around the room, still kneeling and gripping Shizun. His befuddled gaze travels across the empty room, eyes sweeping and searching, where did that cat go?

“Why is your fur so soft bro??”

Shang Qinghua sat in a sideroom with a white cat perched on his lap, after their confrontation in the halls, he had quickly scooped up his feline friend and ran off. His already weak reputation could not take the scandal such a scene would cause.

The cat was looking up at him, green eyes narrowed in distaste. He looked a second away from retracting claws and simply mauling Qinghua, ahh yes this was definitely cucumber-bro. Well he would rather not experience mutilation by kitten, so he re-situates Cucumber-bro. The cat is plopped into the chair in front of him, he strikes a regal sitting pose. Qinghua struggles to contain his laughter. Such a cute small kitten sitting like a lofty immortal - Bahh!

“So what’s the deal with-” he gestures to all of Shen Qingqiu “- this?”

The cat lets out a loud meow, almost like a groan. It swats at the sky and near its head.

“Oh shit, the system?”

The cat actuallys nods its head in response, emerald eyes staring through Qinghua’s soul.

“So have you been a cat for the last five years?”

Shen Qingqiu shakes his head back and forth, no.

“So you were dead and now you’re a cat?”

He nods in confirmation.

“Well you’ve missed quite a bit. My son has decided to claim your corpse, Cang Qiong is mad as always, and Xin Mo is being a real enabler for my son’s obsessive behaviors. Listen bro - it’s kinda bad right now, Binghe is unstable and some weird stuff is happening - my reports tell me there’s movement with a few demon tribes that really do not need to be moving. And yeah it’s just kind of a shit show right now.”

Shen Qingqiu takes in his friend’s appearance, noting the dark bags under his eyes and his pale skin, Qinghua looked haggard, as if he had not slept or eaten since Shen Qingqiu last saw him. Feeling pity for his decrepit friend, Shen Qingqiu jumped onto his lap and began patting at his face with his white paws. He attempts to show affection, but ends up kinda of just lightly smacking him across the face.

At the feeling of attempted affection, Qinghua burst into manic tears.

“Bro-it’s been so hard-” he hiccups “-I really thought you were dead, and everyone thinks I’m a two faced traitor, I haven’t been able to talk to anyone and it’s been so lonely.”

Qinghua keeps sobbing, his cheeks turning a ruddy color and his eyes look like they are bulging out of their sockets. Shen Qingqiu feels bad for his friend, it was scary to be alone in the world of this insane novel, especially as a transmigrator. No one could understand their references or jokes, no one knew about the system - no one could understand them. Their decisions weren't their own, their lives false gifts, their true identities were secret to all, none would know their orginal names nor their true selves. Life as a transmigrator was rough, but alone it could feel impossible.

Feeling guilty, Shen Qingqiu continued to pat Qinghua, the only level of comfort he could provide. Eventually the man’s sobbing subsided, and he was able to compose himself a bit. He ended up grabbing Shen Qingqiu and holding him to his chest, like a baby, which is exactly how Luo Binghe found them.

He had smashed open the door of the room, which prompted a shriek out of Qinghua, and strode towards the two. His dark eyes were glowering with some unidentifiable emotion as they analyzed the frankly embarrassing scene in front of him. Shen Qingqiu felt mortified, and he froze in Qinghua’s arms. What if Binghe got suspicious about their relationship? And was he still mad about their little scuffle over the body? Please Binghe, this poor little cat didn’t mean to offend you, he just wants to live!

“Xiao Bai,” Binghe says, with his unfairly deep and attractive voice.

Shen Qingqiu bats his green eyes innocently at Binghe. Qingua looks between the two before lifting Shen Qingqiu up like a sacrificial offering and placing him before Binghe, who grabs the small body and mimics the hold Qinghua had earlier. To be held like a babe by the protagonist, Shen Qingqiu burrows his head, please have mercy! This is too much!

“Shang Qinghua,” Binghe says, Qingqiu flinches at the noise.

“Umm, yes Junshang?” Poor airplane-bro, he’s practically sweating bullets.

“What did this one just witness?”

“Oh, umm apologies Junshang, this lowly one stumbled upon the cat and well, as befitting Junshang-its exceptional appearance compelled this one to show it comfort…”

Qinghua trailed off his botched attempt to explain the embarrassing display Binghe had just walked into. For a moment afterward no one spoke, as if Binghe was judging them both like a disappointed parent.

“Leave.”

Qinghua scrambles out of the room.

Shen Qingqiu had unburrowed himself from Binghe’s chest and glances curiously up at his possible murderer (is it still murder if he has the body of a cat? Would it be more fitting to refer to it as euthanization?). Binghe meets his gaze.

“We have much to discuss Xiao Bai.”

They were back in Binghe’s room, and as soon as the door had shut, Binghe placed Shen Qingqiu on his bed and took a kneeling position. Wait- what?

Shen Qingqiu surveyed his kneeling companion, panic and confusion running across his mind. What is Binghe doing? Did his legs just give out? Is he dying? He lets out a meow to verbalize his confusion.

Binghe’s head rises (thank god) and he looks up at the cat. His eyebrows are scrunched up and his eyes seem almost pained.

“I apologize Xiao Bai”

Shen Qingqiu tilts his head in confusion.

“This one scared you earlier, that is unacceptable, this one would not wish any harm on you and apologizes for his loss of temper.”

Oh. Ohhh.

In this scene, Binghe reminds Shen Qingqiu of Airplane-bro. If one carefully analyzed Binghe, they could see a similar level of distress. His hair was disturbed, with loose strands flying about his face. His eyes were rimmed by dark circles, his cheeks were pale, his gaze troubled. Though still beautiful - his Binghe was obviously not well. He looked like a kicked puppy with his big, sad, dejected eyes. Feeling a protective instinct overtake him, Shen Qingqiu lifted a paw and subconsciously patted the top of the head in front of him.

The room was silent for a moment, then a small intake of air could be heard. Binghe’s entire frame seemed to slacken, the tension built up in his muscles escaped and he dropped onto the floor as if boneless. His poor disciple, so overwrought with worries and stress, being an emperor must be quite hard, Binghe really needed to take better care of himself! But if headpats could help, well - might as well lend a helping hand/paw.

Shen Qingqiu patted his head again.

Binghe stayed on the floor for a few more moments before suddenly springing up onto his feet. He quickly grabbed the cat, for a moment Shen Qingqiu thought he’d finally pushed the limit, yet rather than break his neck, Binghe wrapped his arms around the small furry body. He then sat back on the bed in a reclining pose and tightened his hold of the cat. Shen Qingqiu was being cuddled. He was being cuddled by Luo Binghe.

He could feel the tight muscles underneath the layers of silk and cloth, the warm beneath warmed his own. All of that conquering business must be quite a workout, his once lanky disciple had truly bulked up. Binghe had such an enviable form, anyone with good taste would take notice of it - especially in such a compromising position.

Binghe moved, placing Shen Qingqiu’s head under his own, as one might hold a child.

“Thank you,” Binghe whispered, his warm breath tickled Shen Qingqiu’s head and startled him for a moment. Even though Shen Qingqiu wasn’t particularly sure what he was being thanked for, he felt it rude to leave Binghe unanswered, so he let out a meow in response.

Upon hearing the small, muffled noise, Binghe’s chest seemed to vibrate with laughter. Little chuckles of amusement escaped him, it was good laughter, Shen Qingqiu thought, the kind of laughter Binghe deserved.

Here in this calm embrace, Shen Qingqiu felt more peaceful than he had in years. He wondered, if this might be possible, if Binghe would even allow it, if he knew who he truly held in his arms.

Apparently the answer to this question would be a resounding no.

One moment Shen Qingqiu was being held in safe warm arms, the next he was in a cold dark place, not another soul to be seen.

“What the fuck?”

Wait he could talk. He looked down at himself and saw a robe clad body - a human body. He turns over his hands and examines them, wait, he recognizes these slender digits. He slaps his face, he knows those high cheekbones and that defined jaw. And these robes, they’re Shen Qingqui’s signature jade ones, the ones he often wore as he drifted about on Qing Jing Peak. So he's back in 'Shen Qingqiu's' body again, nice, just amazing. And from the looks of his surroundings, this isn’t the waking world. This darkness, the strange aura - he’s in the dream realm, likely Luo Binghe’s own. He’s in Luo Binghe’s dream realm wearing the body of his ex-shizun/scum villain.

“Fuck,” Shen Qingqiu says as he covers his face with hands. He just couldn’t catch a break could he? No, he just has to be thrown into these weird ass dramatic situations, at this point he would prefer torture and mutilation, at least that would be straighforwrd, none of this melodramatic tension filled bullshit.

“Alright, guess I’ll just meander around this weird ass dream realm, might as well confront whatever shit storm is coming my way,” Shen Qingqiu says as he begins walking in a random direction.

His environment is abstract, like some shitty painting, it has a shifting feeling as if it's a memory that’s being reimagined and reconstructed second by second. There’s no discernable traits, he can see a horizon but little else, the ground under him is cracked and dry like a desert with small patches of greenery springing up. Shen Qingqiu walks for some amount of time, it’s difficult to tell exactly how long, the environment seems to morph as it proceeds, becoming recognizable. The cracks converge into one dark line that opens wider and wider, waiting for one clumsy step, one push, or a shove, to fall right in-

“Oh,” he knows where he is. This scene, this a remake of the Immortal Alliance Conference, Binghe’s descent into the Abyss.

Some force compels Shen Qingqiu to keep walking, step after step, until he begins to approach two figures standing at the edge of the Abyss. It’s Binghe, the blackened-lotus in all his demonic glory, he holds Xin Mo in his hands, its dark energy seeping off of it and into the air. He points the sword at a smaller body, Shen Qingqiu cranes his head to see it and his eyes fly wide in recognition, a younger Binghe stands at the edge of the abyss. He is covered in dirt and blood, his Qing Jing peak disciple uniform is ruined and stained, his hair a mess, eyes wide with tears and fear. He remembers that fear how it churned his gut and tempted bile to his throat, those eyes, god- he sees them every time he falls asleep. His poor disciple, just a child, Binghe had been just a child who wanted love and home, who had opened his heart and exposed it to the sharpened blade of his Shizun’s betrayal.

Shen Qingqiu feels a prickle in his eyes, he lifts a hand and feels wetness on his cheeks, “Oh- I’m crying.”

Suddenly, the older Binghe snarls, a loud ugly noise, and skewers his younger self. The sword slides through, just like Xiu Ya had, and younger Binghe lets out a pained sob.

“Why?” he chokes out, addressing his older self.

Older Binghe grins, “It’s what we deserve.”

Shen Qingqiu had stood there, watching helplessly as his disciple destroyed himself. He could do it no longer, damn the fear that settled in his bones at the sight of his older disciple, for a moment could he be the hero Binghe deserved? He had to try, even if this was just a dream, these feelings and these thoughts were real. His disciple was stabbing himself, and Shen Qingqiu could no longer watch.

He steps forward and then runs, quickly invading the space between the Binghe’s and grabbing Xin Mo by it’s blade. It splits his skin, Shen Qingqiu pays it no mind.

He lifts his head to meet that darkened gaze, “Stop.”

He expects hostility, anger, even violence. He does not expect tears, but this was Binghe and truly such an action was quite fitting for his silly disciple. A warm feeling wraps around Shen Qingqiu's heart. The scene suddenly changes, black turns to green. The abyss is gone and bamboo trees spring up, the air is crisp and clear. Shen Qingqiu feels it in his bones, this is home, this is their home.

Silent tears still travel down Binghe’s cheeks, unconsciously, Shen Qingqiu reaches up and pats at the wetness, using his sleeves to dry them.

“Really now, Binghe is grown, he should be far done with such behavior.”

Rather than bring comfort, these words escalate the tears. Binghe curls into himself, nearly shaking with sobs, Shen Qingqiu stands awkwardly to the side, his eyes flitting over the hunched form in front of him.

“Please, please, I can’t-” Binghe begins to rasp out, at the sound of his distress Shen Qingqiu kneels down and strokes his hair, soothing him.

“Shh, this master is here, I will protect Binghe.”

Binghe flinches at the words, his whole body shuddering- no not shuddering it begins vibrating. Dark energy pours out of him in waves, Binghe pounces on the defenseless form of his Shizun. Shen Qingqiu looks up in surprise and sees blood-red eyes, oh there’s that anger. It feels as if Binghe is attempting consume him, their forms are already so tightly pressed together and Binghe is slowly lowering his face as if attempting to kiss him (what an absurd thought). In fear, Shen Qingqiu closes his eyes. He feels a warm breath at his ear, so close that canines graze the skin.

“Liar.”

His eyes snap open in time to see Binghe get up, tears still streaming down his face as he grabs Shen Qingqui’s face, sharp claws digging into his pale skin. He flinches at the odd feeling.

“Shizun can’t leave me. Without Shizun nothing matters. I can’t be alone again. I need Shizun. Shizun won’t leave me-”

Binghe’s voice grows deeper with each word, he sounds scary, nearly frenzied. His mannerisms are reminiscent of a panic attack or a qi deviation; The boy is entirely unaware of his surroundings, barely even aware of his own mind, instead all of his attention is on his Shizun. He keeps speaking, the words eventually turning indecipherable with Binghe’s hurried speech, yet the urgency and pain is noticeable in how his grip tightens on Shen Qingqiu’s face, the sharp tips of his nails are digging in, dimpling the soft flesh painfully until they begin to break skin.

He lets out a yelp at the surprising pain, tears prickle at his eyes. Red blood spills at the points of penetration. At the sight of the blood, Binghe’s eyes widen before his demonic aura quickly extinguishes. He hastily removes his grip on his Shizun's face and bodily throws himself off of the other man.

Shen Qingqiu sits up, the blood continues to pour down his face, he raises a quizzical brow at his disciple’s odd behavior.

“This one is sorry.”

Shen Qingqiu perks up at the apology, his strange disciple is apologizing as if the entire ordeal was not an obvious accident.

He tilts his head and smiles at Binghe, wide and indulging, “Don’t worry, this master forgives Binghe.”

Suddenly the dream freezes. The wind that had been artfully dancing across the Bamboo pauses, the clouds in the sky stop. Then there is only darkness.

Shen Qingqiu wakes slowly, his small body is stiff with sleep and he attempts to stretch it out to expedite the waking up process. He is still in Binghe’s warm arms, they’ve tightened since the two fell asleep, making it so Binghe is cuddling the cat like a child would a stuffed animal. It would be quite heart warming if Shen Qingqiu were not the stuffed animal in question. In a fit of petulance he attempts to extract himself before realizing he stood no chance against the iron-hold of Luo fucking Binghe. He decides to accept the situation as is, and cuddles into Binghe’s hold.

He stares up at Binghe’s relaxed face. He looked peaceful in sleep, eyes closed and unbothered, his mouth was slack but still pointed at the corners, as if smiling. Binghe wore sleep well. In the waking world, his eyes were always glaring out and his brow always furrowed. His boy was troubled, with the weight of an empire and a sect on his shoulders, his Binghe had been changed. Forced to grow so quickly, years ago he had been but a child careless and free and now he was chained by the damnation of fate which slotted him in the role of a ceaseless leader. A burden unasked for but present nonetheless, in a strange way Binghe’s troubles reminded Shen Qingqiu of his own.

Chronic illness was a bitch, a bitch that had irreversibly changed the entirety of his life, it had taken the light from his family, the money from their pockets, his freedom had disappeared before his eyes until all he had was his life, and then that was snatch away. What a husk of a man he had become, left to fester in his own damnation, a bitter hermit with no friends, whose family feared for him rather than loved him. When he opened his eyes in this new world, he had felt relief, cold, frightening, and beautiful relief, it swept him away in a current so strong he barely took notice of the world around him. Characters he had thought, he was surrounded by characters, one-dimensional beings. Yet time and time again he had been proven wrong, these people were just as real as he was, their thoughts feelings just as valid as his own.

This pain that Binghe carried, it was not a petty trifle for the protagonist. It was pain, pure and simple. And the deeply human instincts in Shen Qingqiu desperately sought a way to alleviate this pain. He laid in the arms of his greatest friend and foe, the man his whole entire world revolved around, and all he could feel was love. A love that threatened to choke him, to drown his own being, that same love that had caused his death, an all consuming and horrific emotion.

He breathed the cold night air, in and out.

Binghe needed help. He knew that this pain was unacceptable and had to be remedied. There was little Shen Qingqiu could do in his current situation, but one thought came to mind. A memory from when he was sick. It had been bad, an extreme call, the doctors raved about his heart, how the arrhythmia was a serious concern, how he should be open to another surgery should it worsen. He remembers the sterile white room, it was empty. No family, nor friendly faces, they had been too busy to see their nuisance of a son. Shen Qingqiu was alone and dying, he felt his heart, he could hear it beating. He wondered if he would feel it stop, when it finally did stop, because he was going to die. No matter what they said or did, he was going to die. He does not remember the worried faces of the doctors and nurses, nor their scramble out of the room. But he remembers the click clack against the hard floors, such a strange noise in a hospital, his surprised face turning to look down and see the source of the noise. He remembers the volunteer who had guided his hand to the dog’s head of dark brown curls, who had explained that Xiao-Bing was no ordinary dog, that he specialized as an emotional support animal for patients in the hospital. He remembers those wide brown eyes, so open, they did not judge him for his weakness, they simply saw it. They saw him, not his stupid shitty heart, or his weak frame, or his awkward manners - Xiao-Bing had seen Shen Qingqiu, and he had loved him.

Trapped in the arms of a sleeping Luo Binghe, Shen Qingqiu resolved himself to be the best god damn emotional support cat this shitty world had ever seen.

Chapter Text

“It is not often that I am summoned by such a powerful figure,” Madam Meiyin greets.

She bowes upon seeing Luo Binghe, and he respectfully returns the gesture. They stand, and he looks behind her to a servant at the door. At his attention, the servant promptly shuts the door.

“Well, it appears I am in need of your specific insight ,” he replies. 

Luo Binghe quickly directs her to a stone table, where takes a seat and he sits across from her. She seems amused by his direct behavior, but Luo Binghe could care less. Few know that Madam Meiyin’s ability to read the future extends beyond the realm of love, that she can actually predict one’s death just as she can predict the day of their next birth in reincarnation. 

Now situated, she looks to Luo Binghe, “Are you interested in the past or future?”

Quickly, Binghe answers, “Both.” 

She sighs lightly before extracting some incense from her pouch. She lights it and it scents the air with a floral aroma. She then reaches into her pouch to produce a single flower bud. She looks to Luo Binghe and then sets the bud on the table.

“Blow on this and think intently about the person you wish for me to look into.” 

Binghe takes the flower bud and quickly blows on it, it is no difficult task when his thoughts rarely stray from Shen Qingqiu. He hands the flower bud back to Madam Meiyin, she takes it into her hands and covers it for a moment before opening them to reveal a vibrant red flower. Its petals are thin and numerous, with streaks of yellow and white interrupting their scarlet coloring. She studies it for a moment before speaking.

“This is strange…,” Binghe fists his hands in his lap, “...this individual’s past is stained by confusion along with their present, however they are beginning a new period of peace… and soon they will shed much of what has weighed them down.” 

Peace . Binghe hates that word, it sounds like failure, like Shizun never waking up, like the crushing loneliness of grasping at the remnants of being loved. 

“Are you able to tell where they are at this moment?” Binghe’s voice is slightly frenzied. 

Madam Meiyin develops a crease between her brows, “They were far away…too far away…but now they are closer,” she looks up at Binghe, “...closer than you may realize.”

What? What could that mean? Shen Qingqiu’s body had been with him the entire time, so she couldn’t be talking about his physical form–no she was talking about his soul. Somehow his soul was near Binghe? How? A million thoughts flash in his mind, horrible images of resurrection, torture, kidnapping–

“What about his health? Is he okay?"

She concentrates on the flower, for a moment her gaze seems shocked but it quickly cools into something more tepid.

“His current condition is…unexpected… but he is under no harm.”

With those words, Luo Binghe regains some peace of mind. With the information he needed, Luo Binghe thanks Madam Meiyin and she quickly dismisses herself. He does not catch sight of her slight smile or quiet snicker as she departs. 

When Shen Qingqiu wakes up he is alone. Where Luo Binghe had been, the spot was now cold and empty. Shen Qingqiu bats at the empty space with anger, his cute white paws attempting to knead the fabric with vigor. He’s not pouting! He’s just a little annoyed that he woke up to an empty bed, didn’t Binghe know it was rude to not say good morning or at least give a goodbye!

Shen Qingqiu looks around the room to make sure Binghe is actually gone. He sees no hulking mass of heavenly demon, and concludes that Luo Binghe has in fact left. While sulking, Shen Qingqiu notices a strange light in the corner of his eye.

[ System Update: Notification ]

(Details in Message)

A message from the system. Shen Qingqiu wants to scream. He thought he had escaped the damn thing, and now it is back. All of his senses are attuned to the notification, he selects the message to read more and his eyes widen in horror as he scans its contents. 

[ Welcome back User! ]

[ You have begun the side quest: Healing the Protagonist ]

[ You have been granted the power up: Hands ON !]

[ Work hard to help the protagonist ]

[ *Failure to do so will end in permanent termination ] 

Shen Qingqiu wants to scream, very loudly and for a really long time. Instead he breathes in and out. So the system is back, no big deal. He has a side quest, that’s fine–everything is fine. Sure Shen Qingqiu is still stuck in the body of a kitten, he can’t talk to anybody, fix anyone's problems, or defend himself–but sure everything is just fine. 

Also, what is the deal with this power-up? He prods at the system, but receives no more information. 

What does hands on even mean? That’s so vague??

If Shen Qingqiu had hands, he would drag them down his face in frustration. He misses that, and also being taller than a raccoon. 

As Shen Qingqiu continues to bemoan his fortune, the wall in front of him collapses. He stares at the space where the wall had been. Debris floats in the air and obscures his view, but Shen Qingqiu can make out enough to see a broad figure standing in the middle of the wreckage. Shen Qingqiu panics and quickly dives under the blankets, hoping that whoever it is, isn’t interested in murdering any cats today.

Due to his more sensitive ears, he can hear the figure approaching, their slow and sure steps getting closer and closer to his hiding spot. No, no, no, no– Suddenly the blanket is ripped off and the light momentarily blinds Shen Qingqiu’s eyes. When he can see, his eyes widen as they recognize that very familiar and stern face. Liu Qingge’s, very nice, lips are downturned as he looks at Shen Qingqiu’s, admittedly pitiful, form. 

“He got a cat…?” Liu Qingge mutters as he stares.

He spots the collar around Shen Qingqiu’s throat, and stoops down to examine it. What a weird guy, there’s nothing particularly interesting about the plain green ribbon–other than how ill-suited it is in the aesthetics of Huan Hua Palace, which consist of gold and ruby variations. In fact, Shen Qingqiu very much likes the ribbon, it reminds him of a similar one he had gifted to Binghe during his discipleship–though this one was of a much higher quality fabric. 

“Strange,” Liu-shidi remarks after nearly a minute of silence. 

What’s strange is the guy talking to a cat, Shen Qingqiu thinks. 

Calmly, Liu Qingge stands from his crouched position and begins making intense eye contact with Shen Qingqiu, who let me remind you, is a freaking cat! Wait, does this mean Liu Qingge suspects his true identity as Shen Qingqiu? Liu-shidi had always had a very keen intellect for such an eccentric personality!

Excited and anxious by his own musings, Shen Qingqiu is surprised when he feels a weight on his head. He looks up to see the familiar markings of Liu Qingge’s vambrace, which as is implied by the name, a piece of armor attached at the wrist and covering the lower arm–meaning: the weight on Shen Qingqiu’s head is Liu Qingge’s hand. The weight strokes up and down the fur of his head, Shen Qingqiu lets out a contented pur at the pleasant feeling, then freezes at the realization that Liu-shidi is petting. His momentary shock is dissipated as the pleasant feeling of being pet continues.

Liu-shidi is quite good at this, he must’ve had a house pet as a child! Shen Qingqiu thinks.

His eyes close as Liu-shidi’s strong fingers rake through his fluffy white hair, they trail over the fur around his eyes and forehead, and Shen Qingqiu unknowingly begins purring lowly in contentment.

Liu Qingge continues petting him, and Shen Qingqiu somehow ends up splayed out on his back, meowing and purring at Liu Qingge’s ministrations. 

After a while, Liu Qingge stops and Shen Qingqiu gets ticked off at the loss of attention. He lazily pops his head up and opens his wide green eyes to glare at his shidi. Liu Qingge’s face looks surprisingly thoughtful as his eyes focus on Shen Qingqiu. Then all of the sudden, he is reaching out and grabbing Shen Qingqiu around his middle section and holding his small form to Liu Qingge’s chest– Like a baby!

Oh my god, am I about to be kidnapped! Please Liu-shidi, this one has a very important job that he needs to fulfill! 

What will Luo Binghe think when his Xiao-Bái suddenly disappears, talk about abandonment issues–he might just lock up the next person he gets close to!

Unperturbed, Liu Qingge begins walking back to the literal hole in the wall. Shen Qingqiu wants to fight this kidnapping, but he also can’t bare to whip out his claws and scar up Liu Qingge’s pretty face–and if he whips out his weird spiritual powers, Shen Qingqiu is 50% sure that Liu Qingge would assume he’s some sort of demon monster and attempt to hunt him. 

Liu Qingge puts one foot through the hole, when the door slams open. Luo Binghe stands in the doorway, his mouth fixed into a creepy smile, eyes glowing a fierce red, and one hand grabs at Xin Mo’s hilt. 

“I see Liu Qingge has returned for his beating.” 

Instead of replying like a normal person, or even attacking first (as Liu Qingge would normally do), he holds up Shen Qingqiu and responds, “You got a cat.”

Binghe’s expression darkens as he realizes that his cat is currently in the process of being kidnapped. In Binghe’s darkened expression, Shen Qingqiu is seeing a little too much madness and aggression–it reminds him of a dark corrupting malevolence, of emptiness, and the sensation of falling down and down and never feeling the ground. To be honest, he hadn’t been afraid to fall, Shen Qingqiu had been afraid of himself, of how he had ruined Binghe. And now Luo Binghe is looking at Liu Qingge with potent killing intent, anyone with a lick of cultivation experience can feel how Xin Mo manipulates the energy, the boy is lost to the sword’s influence– murder is not something one overcomes, murder of his ex-shishu is not something Luo Binghe, the sweet white lotus buried under years of pain and hatred, would be able to overcome. 

Mind spinning out, Shen Qingqiu puzzles over how to quickly diffuse this situation. He sees that damned hand holding his middle. Without a thought, he bites down hard on the hand.

Two pairs of eyes look down to where he has punctured Liu Qingge. The man lets out a disgruntled noise and his expression transforms into slight annoyance. Shen Qingqiu retracts his bite and looks guilty up at Liu Qingge, trying to somehow emote his own annoyance and exasperation.

Then Luo Binghe laughs, Shen Qingqiu whips his gaze over to take in the receding presence of Xin Mo; Binghe’s creepy smile has transformed into his regular cocky smirk and his eyes are once again the color of earth and not fire. 

“It seems you have an unwilling hostage.” 

And then Luo Binghe attacks. He is fast as lightning as he sweeps Liu Qingge’s feet out from under him, sending him crashing to the floor. Quickly, Binge grabs Xiao-Bái and sets him delicately on the bed. He is suddenly attacked by Liu Qingge, from behind, but turns and counters his strike. The two go at it in a flurry of chaotic and violent movement, Shen Qingqiu sits and watches in amazement at their skill. It’s like watching Dragon Ball Z or Naruto, except much more exciting! Shen Qingqiu is having a great time spectating, until Liu Qingge is bodily thrown by Luo Binghe and almost crushes his small body. Smartly, Shen Qingqiu chooses to flee the scene. 

His small legs scamper as he races into the hallway, in search of something to occupy himself until Luo Binghe wins the fight, it’s inevitable since he’s the unbeatable protagonist! Shen Qingqiu continues his walk, unperturbed, only stopping once after seeing something in the corner of his eye–it slithered like a snake– but was probably just a trick of the light. 

Chapter Text

Luo Binghe’s eyes open slowly as he wakes from a deep sleep. He languishes for a moment in the comfortable bed, savoring the pleasant feeling of being well-rested. He runs a hand over his face, though it stills for a moment when he feels his lips, which are upturned at the edges. It’s not a smile, but it’s something, something different. 

He moves his hand away and buries it into the fabric of a blanket. Luo Binghe feels his demonic energy swirling as his nails elongate and pierce the blanket, he takes deep breaths as he tries to make sense of his thoughts.

Shizun is still dead. He knows this like it is a brand on his soul. 

Shizun is still dead and Luo Binghe is still without purpose. 

But it feels—Luo Binghe takes a deep breath—like something has changed. 

Binghe is still plagued by dreams of that day, every morning he wakes shaking and drenched in sweat with a cry resting on the tip of his tongue, but something is different. As he sits up in the dark, he feels a small body burrowed by his side. His gaze moves down to see what looks like a large ball of cotton with two dark eyes. He lifts a tentative hand to pat the creature’s little head, Binghe is rewarded with a contented purr. 

For a moment he forgets the dream. It does not make reality any different, but something feels as though it has changed. 

Most days Binghe must walk the halls of Huan Hua Palace as he attends to various tasks. He hated grand buildings and their many grandiose decorations. Some days he wishes he could burn the whole building down, he could create a fire hot enough to melt the gold into the Earth, and then he would use the new soil to plant a forest of bamboo. 

But then, he feels a tickle on his leg. He looks down, eyeing the needy animal with its tail trailing along Binghe’s calf. 

The golden arches do not lose their gleam nor transform into trees. But, they begin to feel less like a stranger’s home. 

Back before everything was ruined, Binghe would spend his nights in the bamboo house. He would serve and dine with Shizun as the two recounted the stories of their days. They would joke and banter as the sun slowly slipped below the horizon. Eventually, Shizun would excuse himself for the night, Binghe would watch him retreat to his room, and that very same picture would be seared into his mind as he closed his eyes to sleep. There was a wall dividing the master and disciple bedroom, but most nights Binghe never felt the division.

But now, everything is ruined. Luo Binghe retires to a sparse and lonely room and tries to drown out his aching heart with meditation. He sits on his bed and closes his eyes, he used to search for peace within himself, but now he takes this time to grieve. He grieves for what he has lost, companionship, kindness, and a home; But he refuses to grieve that which he refuses to lose. 

His thoughts are interrupted by a small body sneaking into his lap. Despite himself, Binghe feels amused as he opens his eyes to peek at the kitten. It looks back up at him. 

He begins meditating again. He wonders, rebelling against himself, if he can be allowed to grieve that one thing. What would it mean to let h—it go. 

Xiao-Bái, Binghe muses presently, has enacted some sort of change. Binghe isn’t sure if it is for better or worse.

Dispensing with his morning musings, Binghe finally sits up and stretches his back out, preparing to start his day. He expects to look down and find that slippery animal buried in some strange corner of the bed. Instead, Binghe sees nothing. 

Confused, he stands up and walks around the room. His eyes examine every corner and possible hiding spot. That is until he walks by the window and sees something unexpected.

A familiar green ribbon. It was still tied, but cut in half as if someone had purposefully removed it from Xiao-Bái. Binghe clenches the thing, rage greets him like a familiar friend. 

He looks out the window, noticing a pattern of disturbed grass and dirt. Binghe doesn’t even think as he retrieves an outer robe and Xin Mo, before jumping out the window and running.

Shen Qingqiu had a weird morning. It had started as most of his mornings usually do, he had woken up cuddled up next to the protagonist. He recently dived head-first into his new hobby of protagonist thigh-hugging, also known as roleplaying a domesticated animal. Don’t judge a guy! He’s got to endear himself somehow! But it was actually much easier than he had anticipated, he barely even noticed when he tried to cheer up Binghe’s mood swings, his mind was preoccupied with thoughts of: oh look at his sad eyes! Poor protagonist! Who is making him look like a heartbroken maiden! This is insanity!! 

But back to this morning. Everything had been normal until Shen Qingqiu had heard a weird noise. 

“Shh.”

Then he felt a cool appendage on his body. Repeat a cool, as in cold, appendage! Shen Qingqiu froze in shock. The appendage moved up his body until it approached the back of his neck, oh god, something pierced Shen Qingqiu’s skin. He couldn’t even muster the energy to cry out, as the venom rapidly took effect.

Did a snake just bite me? Hello??

His thoughts became jumbled as the snake slowly extracted Shen Qingqiu’s body from the bed, and dragged him towards an opened window. Groggily Shen Qingqiu opened his eyes, trying to see where he was being taken. He felt quick hands, human hands, on his fur, and soon after he heard a ripping noise. Confused, Shen Qingqiu forced himself to fight off sleep as the careful hands pulled him up and out of the room. Eventually, he couldn’t fight the venom anymore, but at that same time he was hoisted up, and was able to catch sight of familiar, quick-witted and gentle, eyes. 

“This Zhuzhi-Lang greets Immortal Master Shen.” 

So yeah, turns out no good deed goes unpunished. But seriously, why was the demon/guy/snake who he helped, trying to kidnap Shen Qingqiu? Like what kind of cosmic joke is this? Shen Qingqiu continues stewing over his bad luck in the sack that Zhuzhi-Lang had put him into (the guy had been apologizing the entire time for the ‘necessary indignity’). 

Surrounded by fabric, Shen Qingqiu can’t see where they are, so that’s also a nice touch. At this point he just wants to go back to Binghe, he hopes his disappearance is noticed in a few days or at least before he starves to death. 

Shen Qingqiu’s morbid musings are interrupted by a message from the System.

[ User may access new skill: Killer Kitty! ]

What is fuck is that? 

[ Killer Kitty! Is a voluntary Pre-Requisite for the Hands ON! Skill]

That entire sentence made no sense. 

[ Activate skill: Killer Kitty? ]

Below the question are two boxes, [ No ] or [ Yes ].

Against his better judgment, Shen Qingqiu selects the [ Yes ].  Immediately after he selects it, he begins to feel a strange buzzing under his skin, like adrenaline but stronger. He closes his eyes, focusing on the feeling, suddenly he realizes it is his qi, it’s flaring up and causing his senses to heighten. His nose twitches and his ears perk up, he smells grass and hears the sound of animals, his mind conjures up an image of the forest that they are. 

He keeps his senses attuned, curious about where exactly he is being taken, when suddenly the scent changes. From behind them, something is exuding an irony and fleshy smell. It smells like death, but it is underscored by a familiar must. 

Luo Binghe.

His familiar voice growls out, “You seem to have taken something of mine.”

Zhzuhi-Lang freezes, but only for a minute, and then attacks. With his attuned senses, Shen Qingqiu can see a mental visualization of the fight, he feels like those bats that can use echolocation to see, what a weird ability. 

Zhuzhi-Lang attacks with a dagger, aiming for Binghe’s chest, but he misses as Binghe quickly sidesteps and hits Zhuzhi-Lang’s back. Zhuzhi-Lang stumbles for a minute before racing towards Binghe again, this time aiming to kick out his legs. Luo Binghe takes Xin Mo, still in its sheath, and slams it into Zhuzhi-Lang’s side, sending him across the clearing and into a tree. The force of the hit is so great that Zhuzhi-Lang loosens his hold on Shen Qingqiu's bag and ends up dropping it on the ground. 

Shen Qingqiu out a whimper as he hits the hard soil. You just lost one star for your kidnapper rating! 4/5 would recommend as long as the kidnapper avoids overpowered protagonists.

It seems Luo Binghe heard Shen Qingqiu’s whimper, which of course he did, as he walks towards the bag and opens it. The harsh sunlight blinds Shen Qingqiu for a moment, but eventually his eyesight adjusts and he is able to see the worried face of Luo Binghe. A myriad of emotions flashes across Binghe’s perfect face as he looks down at Shen Qingqiu, who feels quite flustered by the attention. 

“Mreow?”

Luo Binghe’s brow furrows at the noise, as though he’s trying to understand what the cat said. Shen Qingqiu has no idea what is going on inside the protagonist’s head, is he happy? Confused? Angry? Why is Luo Binghe looking at him like he peed on the carpet and/or just recited the analects? 

Surprisingly, Shen Qingqiu’s senses are still tuned to one hundred, so he hears as Zhuzhi-lang moves behind the distracted Binghe. He sees the man grab his dagger and rapidly advance on Binghe’s turned back. Meanwhile, Luo Binghe doesn't even notice the return of his opponent, all of his attention is still on Shen Qingqiu. 

Shen Qingqiu watches the dagger approaching, Binghe won’t have enough time to dodge. White hot panic shoots through Shen Qingqiu’s body, his skin is coursing with energy, with power. 

Shen Qingqiu raises a paw and shoots out a blast of pure, powerful, qi. It hits Zhuzhi-Lang and flings him several yards away. 

Kidnapee rating: 0/5, bad conversationalist and quite physically abusive. 

Luo Binghe looks at Shen Qingqiu, his mouth is open in shock and his eyes are wide. There’s also a quirk to his lips, like a smile, the sight does something funny to Shen Qingqiu’s heart. 

Shen Qingqiu perks up at the smile, tilting his little head to get a better look. Except, as he tilts his head, his entire body tilts with it, and he ends up collapsing into Luo Binghe’s hands. 

A message from the system pops up. 

[ Skill: Killer Kitty, is depleted ]

[ Beginning Upload of: Hands ON! ]

For the second time today, Shen Qingqiu begins passing out. His body shakes as his qi rapidly depletes, blearly he wonders if the System is actually trying to kill him. He feels Luo Binghe’s frantic hands checking his qi, he must notice how bad it is as he quickly secures his hold of Shen Qingqiu and starts running. 

Forgetting, we’re forgetting something, Shen Qingqiu forces his eyes to look back, to where Zhuzhi-Lang had been. There was nothing there, he had escaped. 

Shen Qingqiu ends up passing out as he ridicules the shitty ass system. 

When Shen Qingqiu wakes up, he is greeted by a close-up of Luo Binghe’s face. The poor boy looks anxious, his color is pale and he is grimacing. Shen Qingqiu tries to move but is immediately assaulted by an unpleasant full-body ache.

He lets out a pitiful, “Meow.”

Luo Binghe looks down at him, “There’s something wrong with you.”

Binghe’s large hand moves to rest on Shen Qingqiu's back. He feels Binghe’s qi prodding at his own. After a minute of examining him, Binghe retracts his hand and grimaces. 

Binghe mumbles to himself, “Your qi is badly depleted but your meridians are fine… it doesn’t make sense with the fainting and fever….”

Wow, it sounds like whatever happened back there really screwed him up. At least—Shen Qingqiu glances at the worried Binghe—he has a good caretaker. He kind of feels bad about worrying Binghe about this, the poor boy looks exhausted and he probably has so many other duties to complete today, yet he’s devoting so much attention to ‘Xiao-Bái,’ a literal cat. 

Shen Qingqiu tries to stand up and walk to Binghe, to show the situation isn’t that serious. He’s on his feet for a minute before promptly falling back down on the bed. 

“Xiao-Bái!”

Luo Binghe frets over Shen Qingqiu as he re-arranges him on the bed. For a moment Binghe sits next to him, his worried gaze focusing solely on Shen Qingqiu. It feels too intense, being the focus of someone like Luo Binghe. 

“This can not continue…they aren’t working…I need to find a medic.” 

With those words, Luo Binghe stands up and begins fixing his appearance to be presentable. Once finished, he walks to the door and pauses before turning around to look at Shen Qingqiu.

Once again the staggering eyes of the protagonist!

“Stay here.”

Where else am I going to go?

And then Luo Binghe leaves.

For the next few minutes, Shen Qingqiu lays around, bored out of his mind. But his boredom is soon interrupted by a message from the system:

[ Power up: Hands ON !  will be initiated in 3 ]

[ 2 ]

[ 1 ]

And then a cloud of something appears from the air and covers Shen Qingqiu's little cat body. Just like before, his skin was buzzing with energy. He feels electrified as each of his senses is enhanced and distorted. Eventually, the buzzing slows down and disappears, along with the strange cloud.

Shen Qingqiu sits in the bed for a moment, genuinely wondering if the System was trying to kill him. He thought that was Luo Binghe’s job? Does he have two unfairly powerful enemies to fight off? 

Exhausted and confused, Shen Qingqiu raises a hand to massage his aching head.

Wait. What? 

With wide eyes, Shen Qingqiu looks down at the smooth, human, hand. His hand. He looks further down, and sees a human body, clothed in a thin inner robe. Words can not describe the euphoria he feels as he runs his face and arms, savoring the familiar skin. 

His euphoria is cut short as his hands venture to the top of his head, where finds two distinctly non-human additions. 

“No, “ he whispers in shock.

Not this, anything but this.

He rushes over to a nearby mirror and pauses as he takes in the new additions. Cat ears, white cat ears. They move when Shen Qingqiu looks at them, meaning they are a part of this body. He has actual fucking cat ears. 

Shen Qingqiu feels like crying, “No!”

It is then that he notices something wrapped around his leg. In a state of shock, he moves the inner robe to catch a glimpse of white cat tail encircling his lower thigh. A curious hand ventures down—and oh yep—it is definitely attached. 

Shen Qingqiu blushes as he stares down at his reflection. This is his new reality, he is a—a cat boy. His cheeks flush brighter as he thinks of the word, what kind of sick—perverted—freak would orchestrate this kind of thing? With his extra features , scantily thin inner robe, blushing cheeks, and loose long hair, he looks like some kind of wife cursed with some spell as an excuse for papapa. 

And why—why does he still look like his old body? The same body and face, except for the ears and tail? Shen Qingqiu's face loses color as he realizes what this means, his hand moves to his mouth in fear.

“Oh shit…Luo Binghe is going to kill me.”

He threads a hand through his hair as his eyes widen.

“He’s going to see my ridiculous look and know that I was pretending to be his— his pet. He’s going to rip me apart.”

Shen Qingqiu looks at himself in the mirror and sees a dead man. So this is it? The System has delivered him perfectly to the protagonist, and it has ensured a fate more gruesome than Shen Qingqiu thought possible. Sure there were some obstacles with Shen Qingqiu's resistance and even death, but they got—

“That’s right…everyone thinks I’m dead.”

Shen Qingqiu looks around the room, spotting a few spare robes and the open window, and formulates a plan in his head.

“Well, let's keep it that way.” 

Chapter Text

“Yes, this one is a medic, but only for human patients,” says the shaky voice.

Luo Binghe’s eye twitches at the meek man in front of him. He had searched the area for someone to help Xiao-Bái. He found this man in the medical room, creating some kind of foul smelling poultice. The man had dropped his tools at the sight of Binghe, but when he was informed of Xiao-Bái’s illness, he quickly entreated Binghe for details—that is until, Binghe mentioned that Xiao-Bái was not a human . 

Binghe did not reply to the stupid comment, allowing the silence to unnerve the man. 

“There are certain physiological elements that animals possess, which I lack the expertise to treat.” 

Annoyance pounded at Binghe’s temples, “Then where might I find one with such expertise?”

At Binghe’s acerbic tone, the medic flinched and began nervously wringing his hands.

“Well, those kinds of medics tend to treat livestock or horses, and are usually located in smaller villages where such practices are most common—,” Luo Binghe’s glare increases, “—there are none here.”

Binghe wants to slam his fist through something, he knows it will solve nothing, but a little destruction would alleviate this disturbingly helpless feeling. He eyes the medic, maybe he should shake him up a bit, but his musings are cut short by a strange stirring in his blood. 

“You are dismissed,” Binghe says curtly.

The man, despite the fact that they are still in the medical room, scurries out the door. Binghe watches him go, and once he is satisfied that he is alone, closes his eyes and focuses on his blood. 

Controlling his blood mites had been a strange skill to learn, but invaluable. Now he is able to sense and even control those who have ingested it, which now includes Xiao-Bái. He had tried feeding the blood to help heal the cat, but the mites had been surprisingly useless. Now, as he feels the blood mites moving, he is happy he fed them to Xiao-Bái. 

He senses the mites moving fast, and far away. Xiao-Bái is gone, again. Binghe sighs, he is sick of chasing after people —Xiao-Bái.

“It’s just a cat,” he whispers to the open air.

He tastes his own lies on his tongue, chuckling a bit at the strangeness of it all. He walks out of the room, and locks onto the location of his blood. He will retrieve Xiao-Bái as a warning, that Luo Binghe is a man not to be trifled with, that taking from him leads to dire consequences.

His footsteps are surprisingly fast, really, it’s not like he cares about the cat. 

It’s just a cat. 

His stride does not slow. 

After making his great escape, which was really just climbing out a window and fumbling through the woods until he reached civilization, Shen Qingqiu decided to lay low for a few hours in a nearby market. He was hoping he didn’t look too suspicious, dressed in plain robes and wearing a weimao, he had been quite surprised finding it in Luo Binghe’s closet. The robes themselves were a simple beige color though the waist piece was outfitted with a fan, Shen Qingqiu hadn’t noticed the accessory until he reached down on muscle memory and used the fan to cool himself off. 

Shen Qingqiu had reveled in the ability to walk around, on two feet! And enjoyed perusing the selections of the market. His hungry eyes glanced at stalls selling grilled meats, sweet tanghulu, fragrant pastries, and fresh fruit. With such tempting displays, he felt compelled to buy a snack.

Which led to him realizing he had no money, and would need to bust out some bartering, causing this scene:

“But auntie, this one is damaged, see—,” Shen Qingqiu lifts up the bruised peach “—it can not be worth the same as the undamaged ones.” 

The old woman quirks a brow, “It will taste the same.”

Shen Qingqiu vigorously shakes his head, “No, the flavor will be impure because of the damage, it would be unwise to sell such faulty product and become infamous for low quality standards”

Seemingly exhausted by Shen Qingqiu, the woman throws up her hands, “Fine! Fine Just take it and leave me alone.” 

Shen Qingqiu smiles, not that she can see it through the fabric of the Weimao, “Many thanks.”

She just grunts, “shoo!”

He chuckles as he hurries away from her table and peruses the rest of the market. Happily, he feasts on his sweet treat and decides to observe the people around him. The market is a bit crowded now, as the sun begins to set and people decide to spend the last hours of the day socializing and shopping. He spots children who run around the stalls and shove chestnuts in their mouths while giggling at their friends' silly faces, there are blushing couples who spend more time staring at each other than the displays, shop keepers that barter like barking dogs, tittering aunties that judge every passerby, Liu Qingge wielding a sword—

Shen Qingqiu stops walking, his body freezes at the sight before him. He should turn around and go, keep walking until he’s out of town and across the continent. He can not be found, because if he is then he will need to explain everything and if he explains everything then he will get turned over to Luo Binghe to be slayed like the scum he is. Shen Qingqiu lied, he hurt people, he ran—all he could do now—was to keep running.

For a moment he savors the image before him, of Liu Qingge, strong and chivalrous Liu Qingge, who had, despite all odds, become one of his dearest friends. If he walked away, he would never see him again. 

He turns around, and takes one step. 

“Shen Qingqiu.”

He keeps walking. It must be in his head, there is no possible way Liu Qingge could recognize him.

Then a familiar face appears in front of him. Liu Qingge’s eyes practically pierce through the cover of the weimao, his strong hands shoot out to grab at Shen Qingqiu’s arms and hold him still. Shen Qingqiu should resist, he should shrug off his grip and walk away. 

Before he can do so, one of Liu Qingge’s hands moves to Shen Qingqiu’s waist, to the fan hanging off his belt. Careful fingers grasp the polished wood and painted fabric, Liu Qingge turns it over in his hands, his eyes trace over it with a sort of reverence. 

Eventually, he looks up, “It has to be you, no one else would have this.”

Shen Qingqiu takes a deep breath, formulating a million stories and excuses in his head. He could do it, he could lie,  and walk away—but he looks at Liu Qingge’s hopeful gaze and he wonders, should he do it?

Shen Qingqiu is tired, he has been tired. Fuck it. 

Wearily, he says, “This conversation would be best in private—,” Shen Qingqiu motions to a nearby teahouse “—follow me, Liu-shidi.”

The second he speaks, Liu Qingge’s hand on his shoulder tightens its grip, it doesn’t loosen until they enter the teahouse and are escorted to a private room with a table, where they separate to sit on opposite sides. 

A pleasant looking woman quickly serves them tea, when she leaves they sit, for a moment, in awkward silence. 

Liu Qinggge decides to break it, “Shen Qingqiu, what happened?” 

Shen Qingqiu takes a moment to savor the peace of the teahouse, the pleasant aroma of the steeped leaves, and the soft mat under him. His careful hands reach up to remove his weimao.

Liu Qingge stares at the two white appendages, in response, Shen Qingqiu raises a bemused brow.

“Much Liu-shidi, much has happened.”

Liu Qingge just keeps silently staring.

Shen Qingqiu lets loose an unconscious chuckle, he’s missed Liu Qingge’s peculiar brand of emoting. 

“As you know, I died, except I didn’t really die—,” Shen Qingqiu stares into his tea cup “—instead, my soul was displaced and eventually found its way into a new vessel, a distinctly non-human one,” he gestures at his ears.

“That cat, your Luo Binghe’s cat,” Liu Qingge says. Shen Qingqiu blushes at his wording, it’s true, it’s just so embarrassing to hear out loud. 

“Liu-shidi is correct, when I first awoke in the vessel I was discovered by Luo Binghe, he did not suspect my identity as Shen Qingqiu, but has provided me shelter and food at Huan Hua palace. But today, something changed and my vessel transformed into some cross between my new and old body.” 

As Shen Qingqiu’s conclusion finishes, he notes that Liu Qingge’s cheeks are dusted with a  light pink blush, Liu-shidi must be so embarrassed for my vanishing dignity. 

“Give me your wrist.”

Shen Qingqiu obliges and extends his arm across the table. Liu Qingge takes it, delicately, and immediately begins sending out probing tendrils of qi into Shen Qingqiu’s spiritual veins. Shen Qingqiu shivers in surprise at the feeling, before relaxing into the familiar routine. 

After a few minutes, Liu Qingge lets go and Shen Qingqiu retracts his arm.

Liu Qingge  glares at the table, “The structure of your spiritual veins feels similar, but they keep shifting back and forth, like they can’t adapt to your body.”

Shen Qingqiu sighs, he wonders if this is the work of the system, or if it's  just a funny kick in the nuts from fate. 

“How troubling.”

Liu Qingge grunts, “You need to see Mu Qinfang.”

Shen Qingqiu avoids Liu Qingge’s gaze, “Will my marital-siblings even want to see me after all the trouble I’ve caused?”

Liu Qingge sends him a look, Shen Qingqiu does not understand what it means. 

“You died.”

Shen Qingqiu runs a hand down the side of his face, “And in doing so I left my peak without a leader and my disciples without a teacher,” he flashes a rueful smile, “I made that decision, and for that I must live with the consequences.”

Shen Qingqiu recalls how Shang Qinghua had been at their reunion, scared but relieved, Shen Qingqiu had been missed despite his best efforts. He knows his decision had consequences for everyone, consequences that he barely considered when he forfeited his life for Luo Binghe’s.

Liu Qingge’s eyes glow with a strange emotion, “Save the speech for when you return.”

A retort is on the tip of Shen Qingqiu’s tongue, but he is interrupted by an announcement from the system.

[ Power up: Hands ON! Has reached its time limit. Deactivating in 3]

Time limit???

[ 2 ]

[ 1 ]

Shen Qingqiu flashes Liu Qingge a wide-eyed look as his body ‘poofs’ and transforms back into a little white kitten. 

Liu Qingge leans over the table to stare down at the kitten, “Shen Qingqiu?”

“Meow.”

As Liu Qingge reaches over to grab Shen Qingqiu, the door to the room bursts open. Luo Binghe stands in the doorway, leaking dark energy, and staring down at the sight of Liu Qingge hoisting up Xiao-Bái. Shen Qingqiu’s mind begins cycling through a series of: oh fuck! How did he find me? Why is he looking at Liu-shidi like that? 

Luo Binghe looks ready to attack, but his eyes are trained on Xiao-Bái, in Liu Qingge’s arms, he flashes a look at Liu Qingge which is surprisingly returned, and Shen Qingqiu is gently set back down into his little pile of clothing. And then the fighting begins.

Luo Binghe rushes at Liu Qingge like a bull, there is no reprieve as he continues to strike at his marital uncle who struggles to dodge in the enclosed space. Eventually, one of Binghe’s hits lands, and he uses Liu Qingge’s weakness to smash his head into a nearby wall. Shen Qingqiu gulps as he sees the war god’s body go limp and slump to the floor.

Please don’t be dead, please don’t be dead, please don’t be dead—

“Liu-shishu was much easier to knock out this time,” Luo Bingeh observes as he hoists Liu Qingge’s body up and places it next to the table. Shen Qingqiu watches as Binghe steps out to call for a worker, and requests the room for the rest of night, ensuring that Liu Qingge will not be ‘disturbed,’ or given medical attention, until tomorrow.

Is this some sort of routine for the two of them?

Once the arrangements have been made, Luo Binghe turns his attention to Shen Qingqiu. Carefully, he grabs him from his pile of robes  and raises the cat to meet his line of sight. They stare at each other for a moment, before Luo Binghe’s face changes from stoic to weary. His eyes grow softer and tired and his mouth transforms into a sort of smiling-grimace. 

“Okay,” Luo Binghe takes a deep breath.

“Let’s go home,” He tucks Shen Qingqiu into his outer robe, and they exit the teahouse.  

The sun has set by the time that they return to Huan Hua Palace. Luo Binghe quickly hurries through the halls and into his own room. He extracts Shen Qingqiu from his place in his robes, and sets him down on top of the bed.

For a moment, he just stares, with an indescribable emotion in his eyes, but eventually snaps out of it and returns to his desk. Shen Qingqiu watches as Luo BInghe settles into the piles of paperwork, his back is turned, so all Shen Qingqiu can see is his head of curly hair and diligent hands. For a moment, he is able to pretend that they are somewhere else, in the past, where the secrets were fewer and innocence was within grasp.

It is strange, he muses, how he still sees his white lotus in Luo Binghe, despite the abyss, his betrayal, and everything else—the white lotus persists. Binghe still approaches everything like a challenge, like he needs to prove himself by accomplishing the insurmountable, as a disciple he had advanced his skills and knowledge far beyond his peers, and now he continues to strive for perfection. But this persistence had been different, when Binghe was a tiny thing with round cheeks and bright eyes, it had been an endearing tug at the heart to see him studying and collaborating with his peers. 

But now, Shen Qingqiu looks at the strong back in front of him, this persistence manifested in besting Liu Qingge in a fight, whipping his subordinates into submission, besting all the challengers—and doing so with a handsome smirk and clever eyes. 

Shen Qingqiu stills at his own thoughts. 

What? A handsome smirk and clever eyes?

But it’s true, Luo Binghe’s beautiful face is an indisputable fact. He recalls how Binghe had looked besting Zhuzhi-Lang and Liu Qingge, his broad shoulders and strong arms struck them down so efficiently, and his wild curls would whip about as he dodged and attacked, and his large hands would grab them, dominating every cell of his opponent—

Oh. Oh no. 

If Shen Qingqiu had hands he would drag them across his face in shame, for now he settles on digging his head into the blanket and letting out a pitiful whine, which of course, attracts Luo Binghe’s attention. 

“Xiao-Bái?”

Luo Binghe hovers over Shen Qingqiu, those large hands prod at him for a moment, before settling down to rest on his still-buried head. 

“Are you alright?”

At Luo Binghe’s genuine and caring tone, Shen Qingqiu wants to whimper again. Go away gay thoughts! Begone!

Maybe this is just a side-effect of spending so much time around Luo Binghe? Shen Qingqiu internally shakes his head, that sounds like a lame excuse even to him. 

Well this sucks , Shen Qingqiu thinks as he looks up at Binghe’s face, I guess I caught feelings for the protagonist. 

Eventually, Luo Binghe is assured that the cat is not about to keel over and die, and goes back to his desk to continue working. 

And then, just to top off this strange day, Shen Qingqiu gets another message from the system. 

[ Announcement: New System Update ! ]

[ System update will initiate at user’s approval ]

What do you mean ‘update’? 

[ System update includes: access to new regions, implementation of new point systems, and  access to original user’s body ]

Shen Qingqiu stiffens, Woah wait, original user’s  body? 

[ User will be granted the body of : Shen Qingqiu ]

What happens if I don’t approve the update?

[ Without approval, the update will not commence and user will lose access to new features ]  

So, he has two choices: stay Xiao-Bái or become Shen Qingqiu. Being Xiao-Bái has been interesting, but Shen Qingqiu can’t keep up this act. He cherishes the time he’s been able to spend with Binghe, but he can’t maintain this kind of proximity with his, ugh, feelings, it’s just not ethical (and if he’s being honest, it aches t to roleplay a domesticated life with Luo Binghe, when he actually very much would like to wake up every morning to Binghe’s sweet face, and always be with him, and share meals, and augh!! Too many feelings! Too many feelings!). Shen Qingqiu turns his attention back to the System.

[ Update confirmation: ]

[ Yes ] [ No ]

Shen Qingqiu selects [ Yes ] and then he waits. He starts to sweat as he realizes that the system might transform him into Shen Qingqiu with Binghe in the room, but as he waits he realizes something might be off, maybe it’s waiting for Shen Qingqiu to be alone—

[ 1% download complete ]

[ Estimated completion time: 12 hours ]

Shen Qingqiu lets out another groan, and then another when Luo Binghe runs over and begins tending to his (very uninjured) body. 

When Shen Qingqiu had awoken the next morning, it was to an empty bed. He had harrumphed a bit and rebelliously messed up the blankets, before settling in the warm spot left by Luo Binghe’s body. When he realized what he had done, acted like a jilted lover, he had screeched into the blanket. So overall, it had a been a pretty chill morning

Shen Qingqiu then spent the first few hours of the day contemplating what to do after his transformation. He had two options: run or maybe, possibly, on the off chance that it felt right, he could consider talking to Binghe. It would be an apology of sorts, a calm moment to explain himself and initiate his deserved retribution. If he was still in the state to return, then he would proceed to Cang Qiong, where he would try to fix his other messes, and hopefully forget about his—well you know— feelings. 

Content with his plan, Shen Qingqiu decides to check the update timer.

[ 99.98 % downloaded ]

[ 1 minute until completion ]

Shen Qingqiu steals himself for the time remaining, and then it happens. Bam, poof, whatever, the transformation starts. He feels his qi wharping, like Liu Qingge mentioned, it had been shifting and changing but now his spiritual veins were finally behaving. 

Shen Qingqiu closed his eyes as he felt the transformation conclude, anticipation burned hot in his chest. Then, he opened his eyes, and first checked his ass. No tail! Nice!

Wait , Shen Qingqiu looks down at his naked human body. He freezes for a moment before running over to Luo Binghe’s closet and flinging it open, he retrieves a pair of inner robes and a thinner outer robe and quickly shucks them on. 

Shen Qingqiu’s cheeks flame as he fumes, how was he supposed to have a respectful conversation in the nude! The system really had no care for its user, what if he had been in public?  He would have been arrested for indecency or whatever the xianxia equivalent is. 

After dressing, Shen Qingqiu sits on the bed and faces the mirror, taking in his appearance. He looked just like he had yesterday, just without the ears and tail. Sadly, he still has the blushing cheeks and disheveled hair, he could try to tie it up but he doesn’t want to use one of Luo Binghe’s ribbons and risk upsetting the poor body. 

While Shen Qingqiu observes himself, he does not notice the bedroom door slowly open. He does, however, hear the sharp gasp come from behind him. 

Shen Qingqiu whips around making eye contact, real human eye contact, with Luo Binghe. Binghe’s mouth is open and gaping and his eyes are wide in shock. 

He hasn’t tried to attack his former Shizun, which feels like a good sign.

Shen Qingqiu smiles, small and warm, “Hello Binghe.”

That is when Luo Binghe decides to pounce. He throws his body at Shen Qingqiu, his hands grappling for his throat, Shen Qingqiu dodges to the side by throwing his body onto the bed beneath him. Luo Binghe takes advantage and straddles him by the legs, keeping him pinned down. Shen Qingqiu groans as the air is knocked out of him, he tries to thrash but Binghe’s solid weight is too much. 

Shen Qingqiu goes limp as the fight drains out of him, ofcourse, this was how it was always supposed to be. He looks up at Binghe’s narrowed eyes, he wishes he could free his arm and smooth down Binghe’s wild hair.

“How dare you,” Luo Binghe growls.

Yes, how dare I show my face and expect anything but what I’m owed, well let’s get on with the strangling I guess. 

“Binghe—”

“—SHUT UP!”

Shen Qingqiu abruptly shuts his mouth. 

“How—How dare you wear his face!” 

Binghe’s voice is unsteady and dark, his eyes pierce into Shen Qingqiu’s like daggers. Shen Qingqiu struggles to understand him.

“Binghe, what is this about my face—”

Shen Qingqiu is interrupted by a hand that shoots out and grasps onto his throat, Luo Binghe looks neutral as he slowly chokes Shen Qingqiu. But worse than that, Shen Qingqiu feels some terrible numbness sweep through his spiritual veins, he gasps as without-a-cure flares up, sealing his cultivation and causing him intense pain. Tears prickle at his eyes as the asphyxiation and aching pains overwhelm him. 

“How dare you pretend to be my Shizun.”

Huh? Shen Qingqiu lets out a strange choked noise at Binghe’s words, pretend? Is he getting called out as a transmigrator? Or is Bighe just having a little episode? Or, Shen Qingqiu wonders, maybe he really thinks he’s dealing with an imposter. 

Using what little strength he has left, Shen Qingqiu struggles to say, “no—cure—check—true.”

Luo Binghe stills momentarily at the mention of the poison, before quickly grasping Shen Qingqiu’s arm and sending some probing qi, he is greeted with a familiar blockage, caused exclusively by the without-a-cure poison. Shen Qingqiu can’t help but grin at the stupefied look on Luo Binghe’s face. 

For a moment Luo Binghe just stays there, straddling Shen Qingqiu with his hands loosely encircling his throat. Shen Qingqiu learns much about himself at that moment. 

Then Luo Binghe does the weirdest thing, he flings himself off Shen Qingqiu and prostrates himself on the ground. Shen Qingqiu just blinks at the sight before him, before hastily joining Binghe on the floor and trying to hoist him up. 

“Luo Binghe, what are you doing?!” 

Still prostrating, Binghe replies, “This disciple is apologizing.”

Confused, Shen Qingqiu decides to sit down next to Binghe, “For what?”

At his question, Luo Binghe finally raises his head. Shen Qingqiu feels the instinctive need to hide from his intense gaze.

“How can Shizun ask that question, knowing that this disciple was his killer, and that again this disciple has tried to threaten Shizun’s life?”

Shen Qingqiu sighs at Binghe’s dramatics, honestly the whole strangling thing was just an accident, and Binghe has plenty of reasons to be suspicious of imposters and attackers. But, the other thing, his self destruction, yes he can see why Binghe feels that way.

Without thinking, Shen Qingqiu’s hand moves to Binghe’s back, soothingly petting at the taut muscle. He should stop, but, looking at Binghe’s teary-eyed gaze, he doesn’t want to.

“Luo Binghe, on that day, I made my choice, you hold no blame for my actions or their consequences.”

“You wouldn’t have had to choose, if I hadn’t—” Binghe pauses to take a deep breath “—why did you do it? Please explain, I can’t understand what your sacrifice means when you once wished me dead.” 

Shen Qingqiu freezes at the mention of the abyss. He takes a moment to arrange his thoughts, he will tell Binghe what he is able to, and he will hope that it is enough, enough to show Binghe his place in Shen Qingqiu’s heart, but not enough to see how deeply nestled it is. 

“Okay then, but if we are to discuss this, then please sit up so that I may properly address my disciple.”

Begrudgingly, Binghe sits up and turns to Shen Qingqiu. Okay then, time to bite the bullet. 

“I have never lived a particularly happy life, despite my comforts and ranking, I have always felt an ache that I could never soothe. I thought I would live the rest of my life that way, always waiting for something missing,” he is unraveling an old pain from an old life, a pain that had followed him for too long. 

Shen Qingqiu looks over at Binghe, and flashes a slight smile, “But then you showed up, my precious disciple with more talent and kindness than I knew how to handle. It was as though I had been waiting for you for my entire life”

Shen Qingqiu’s smile dims, his eyes focus on the ground, “But then I made a mistake, a horrible mistake, and I have not known a happy day since. I do not ask for forgiveness, because I can not forgive myself, all I can give you is the truth: I would give my life for you again, not because of my own self loathing, but because I can’t live in a world where you do not exist.”

When Shen Qingqiu is finished, the two sit in silence. Shen Qingqiu wants to squirm, he wants to shout, to cry, to shake Luo Binghe by the shoulders and demand a reply—he does none of these things. 

Finally, Binghe speaks, “But—I am a demon, Shizun hates demons.”

Shen Qingqiu looks up, his eyes catching on the glowing red huadian on Binghe’s forehead, and then on his sharp canines and blood-red eyes. Approaching slowly, Shen Qingqiu moves Luo Binghe’s bangs from his forehead, so that he may have an unobscured view of the huadian.

“You are Luo Binghe. I made a horrible judgment in error, but I have never hated what you are. ”

Something changes in Binghe’s face, the blazing fire in his eyes calms and his anticipatory grimace fades. All that’s left is Luo Binghe, with shock and something akin to awe painted on his face.

“Shizun,” Binghe's voice is tentative, as though he is savoring the word. 

“Luo Binghe,” Shen Qingqiu hums in reply, his hand still placed on Binghe’s back. 

“How—How are you even here?”

Luo Binghe’s question is whispered, like a secret. Shen Qingqiu grimaces, realizing what exactly he is going to have to fess up to.

“After self-destructing, my soul somehow relocated to another vessel.”

Binghe perks up, “Another body?” His eyes trail over Shen Qingqiu’s familiar form.

Shen Qingqiu puts a hand on his head, “It is complicated, when I awoke in my new vessel I quickly realized nearly five years had passed since my death and my capabilities at this time were limited due to—well—um—I was—” He looks Luo Binghe in the eyes “—I was a cat. But my cultivation seemed to cause a change in the body and I ended up reverting to my old form”

Slowly, Luo Binghe’s eyes widen in understanding, and his cheeks begin to flush a scarlet color. The poor boy must think his Shizun is some sort of voyeur! I promise I didn’t take advantage! 

Luo Binghe’s voice shakes as he speaks, “Then, Shizun saw it…you know now?”

Confused, Shen Qingqiu replies, “About what? My corpse?”

Now, Luo Binghe looks confused, “Well yes, but—”

“—Do not worry Binghe, I do admit it was a strange discovery but I understand strong emotions can cause us to act irrationally,” Shen Qingqiu says, trying to soothe his disciple’s anxieties. 

At his words, Binghe does seemed relieved, though he keeps shooting Shen Qinqgiu pointed looks. 

“Shizun, what are you going to do now?”

Shen Qingqiu is surprised by the question but realizes that Binghe probably wants to put some distance between them, after unknowingly living with his dead teacher for the past few months. Yeah that kind of situation definitely provokes some kind of restraining order. Binghe might not want to kill him, but he probably doesn’t have much fondness left for his confusing and invasive Shizun. 

“Well, I would like to return to Qing Jing Peak, Liu Qingge actually offered to help me get back into the sect’s good graces!”

While he had spoken, Shen Qinqgiu had been playing with a piece of thread dangling from his robes, when he finished he had looked up only to be greeted by a dark glare from Luo Binghe. Maybe he would prefer if Shen Qingqiu moved across the continent?

“Liu Qingge?”

Shen Qingqiu raises a questioning brow, “Yes, I was able to contact him and he seems to still have some fondness for me,” Shen Qinqiu’s eyes catching on the window, it must be mid-day already, “I should retrieve him from the teahouse, before he runs off somewhere else.”

Shen Qingqiu stands, dusting off his clothes and fixing his robes. 

“Wait—”

He is not running, he is moving on, there is a difference, “Be well Luo Binghe, it has been a pleasure to watch you grow and I look forward to hearing of your continued success.”

Shen Qingqiu turns to go, but is stopped by a hand, Luo Binghe’s hand, gripping his arm. He turns around, a question on the tip of his tongue, but Binghe speaks first. 

“What is Shizun saying?”

Binghe’s glaze is locked onto his own, Shen Qingqiu feels an ache in his chest, t his is the last time I will see those eyes. 

“Luo Binghe, this is goodbye.”

Immediately, Binghe’s grip on his arms tightens, not enough to hurt but probably enough to bruise. What’s with this act? Shen Qingqiu had given his apologies, explained himself, and reassured Binghe’s innocence—his role was over—so why couldn’t Binghe just let him go? 

“Why?” Binghe’s voice sounds like it did before, predatory, dangerous. 

The truth bursts out of Shen Qingqiu like a wave, “I can’t do this anymore.”

“What?” Binghe shouts, “What can’t you do?”

Shen Qingqiu is shaking with energy, with longing, with rage, and fear and every other fucking emotion he has cycled through over the last few days. 

He turns his body fully, and snarls, “I can’t be around you!”

At his words, strangely, Luo Binghe relaxes. “So Shizun is a liar, he does find this one disgusting.”

Shen Qingqiu wants to rip Binghe’s stupid, pretty, little smirk off his face. Wasn’t Luo Binghe supposed to be a genius! How the hell is he misreading Shen Qingqiu’s adoration for ‘disgust!’

“Binghe—”

Binghe cuts him off, “Fine, leave, just like everyone else.”

And that, that is what breaks Shen Qingqiu. He thinks of the dream, the dream where Luo Binghe begged him: “Shizun can’t leave me. Without Shizun nothing matters. I can’t be alone again. I need Shizun. Shizun won’t leave me.”

He thinks of another life, where all he had, as his body failed him, was a furry companion. I have always felt an ache that I could never soothe.

“I love you.”

Shen Qingqiu says it plainly, his voice steady and sure as he looks directly at Luo Binghe.

He continues, “I love you, not in the way a master should love his disciple, and I can not stop loving you, so I need to go—,” Shen Qingqiu’s voice hitches, “—I am greedy, I can not stomach watching you live a full life without me, so I must—”

Shen Qingqiu’s words die on his tongue as Luo Binghe grabs his face and smashes it into his own. What is this strange headbut? And why is Luo Binghe using his tongue? Shen Qingqiu feels a nibble on his lip, which escalates to a full-blown bite, Shen Qingqiu squeaks at the pain. Luo Binghe continues, this tongue attack for a few more minutes, until finally separating and resting his forehead on Shen Qingqiu’s shoulder. 

His mouth is next to Shen Qingqiu’s neck, it tickles as he speaks, “What was Shizun saying?”

“Binghe—”

 Luo Binghe takes the opportunity to nibble on Shen Qingqiu’s neck, his warm mouth causes Shen Qingqiu to let out a breathy noise. Satisfied, Binghe extracts himself to look down at Shen Qingqiu’s splayed out form.

“I have loved you since you first smiled at me, when I was too young to understand the depth of my emotions. I loved you even when I hated you, and I loved you in death when I believed you were lost to me.” 

Shen Qingqiu gasps, he wonders what fantasy world he is in, disbelieving such words. But, he looks at Luo Binghe’s enamored face, and he tries to believe, no, forces himself to believe that this is the real world. This is the real world, and Luo Binghe is in love with Shen Qingqiu.

Unable to respond, Shen Qingqiu acts on instinct, and buries his head into the nearest available surface: Luo Binghe’s chest. 

“Binghe,” he whispers into the fabric.

He feels arms encircling his torso, with a few fingers drawing patterns across his skin.  

“Shizun.”

Shen Qingqiu flushes at the word, popping up from his heading place to glare at Luo Binghe’s mischievous face.

“Do not call me that when we are in this type of situation, ” he hisses.

“Okay then BaoBei—”

Shen Qingqiu, shuts him up with a kiss, a real kiss and not whatever oral attack Luo Binghe had done. He grinned as Binghe moaned into his mouth, he was going to teach this boy how to give a real kiss. The two continued for a few more minutes, until Shen Qingqiu broke away for air. 

Luo Binghe took the moment to stare, at the no doubt, debauched sight of Shen Qingqiu. And then, the dastardly little demon, licked his lips, and dove back in.

Luo Binghe took, Shen Qingqiu gave. And they did so for the rest of the night. 

Luo Binghe wakes up with a jolt. His arms tighten around the body in his grasp, it wasn’t a dream. He looks down at a serene face, Shizun. 

Shizun had come back, and he had apologized to Luo Binghe, he revealed that he did not care about Binghe’s lineage, and did not despise him for being a demon. He had even confessed that he loved Luo Binghe, even after seeing the ruined creature he had become. 

His arms tighten around Shen Qingqiu, love, Shizun loved him so much that it hurt . Luo Binghe had never expected such an outcome, to be told that his scars were matched by Shen Qinqiu, that their aches were the same, that the only solution was each other. It felt—it felt like joy, like companionship, like purpose.

Binghe still had questions, questions about the abyss, about Shizun’s resurrection, and more—but, for now, he will savor this moment. His eyes track the healthy pallor of Shizun’s skin, in his arms, Shizun feels warm. He spots a myriad of bruises on Shizun’s skin, on his neck, his chest, and his legs. Some part of him, the demon part, preens at the art he had created.  

After a few minutes, Shen Qingqiu stirs in his arms.

He mumbles blearily, “Binghe?”

Luo Binghe burrows his face into Shen Qingqiu’s hair, “Shizun.”

He feels a playful swat at his arm, still wrapped around Shizun’s waist. 

And then, to break up this domestic scene, the door slams open, Liu Qingge stands in the entryway.

Immediately, Binghe covers Shizun with the blankets, no one else is allowed to see his Shizun in such a state. Especially Liu Qingge. 

“Where is he?” Liu Qingge asks.

Shizun doesn’t seem to understand the state he is in, as he pops out of his covers at the sound of Liu Qingge’s voice. 

“Hi Liu-shidi!” 

Liu Qingge stills for a moment, as any mortal would, at the sight before him. Shen Qingqiu is wearing not a scrap of fabric, except for the green ribbon tied around his neck (Binghe’s idea!). The only thing providing him decency is his loose black hair which spills across his body like ink, making his skin look even paler and more delicate. 

Luo Binghe watches the shock and stupefaction overtake Liu Qingge’s face, “You—indecent—,” Liu Qingge trips over his words as he runs back out of the door.

Shen Qingqiu turns a thoughtful gaze to Luo Binghe, “What a strange reaction.”

Luo Binghe hums in agreement, as he takes Shen Qingqiu back into his arms.

“Let’s go back to bed.”

Shen Qingqiu’s eyes take on a glassy look, as a beautiful smile appears on his face

 “Okay.” 

There are so many things to do, secrets to learn, identities to reveal, and stories to tell. But for now, Luo Binghe and Shen Qingqiu are content, holding one another as they drift off to sleep.