Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

A/N: Thank you to the discord hive mind for fleshing out this one.  Note the first chapter is new!  My computer had previously eaten it, but I just found a backup, so here it is. 

The mech didn’t have much in the way of escape pods - the doctor had apparently been confident, riding high on the power of the emerald, that he would never need one.  Per the manual there was a tiny, one-man contraption labelled Stonesaver though, with enough power to go about a mile - out of the range of likely debris and destruction.

He, Stone, did not currently need it.  He was feeling pretty much fine.  He’d had a bad blow to the head and should probably get himself checked out when feasible, but for the moment he seemed to be functioning within normal parameters.

The doctor was not so lucky.  Robotnik had not really regained consciousness after his fall; his eyes opened sometimes but when they did they were green and sightless.  “Better,” he would insist.  “I’m getting better.  I can move now.”

He was indeed getting better.  When Stone had first found him in the rubble, in a pool of blood, his body had been bent so sharply it was obvious his back was broken.  The sight was so horrifying that against all medical sense Stone had moved him, trying to unfold him into something human-shaped again, and the jostling had made him come awake with a roar - and a sputter of green lightning later his spine had knit itself back together.

The pace of the improvement was slowing dramatically though, the green sparking less and less vividly, and Stone knew it was only a matter of time before whatever power was aiding his healing ran out entirely.

“We have to get you out of here, sir.”  He had to keep his voice down, but Robotnik was so out of it that shouting would be a better bet.  He compromised by leaning in and talking directly into the doctor’s ear.  “They’re done waiting.  Their backup’s arrived, their lights are set up, they’re starting to cordon off the area.  If we don’t get out now we’ll be trapped.”

Robotnik turned his head to face the sound - smoothly now at least, no more zombielike jerking.  “Stone.”

“Yeah, Doctor, it’s me.  Can you understand me?  We have to get you out of here.”

“It’s dark.”

“No.  It’s still daylight.  Your vision just hasn’t come back yet.”

“I can see.  I can see fine.  I just can’t see because it’s dark.”

He was used to not understanding the doctor, but usually it was because the doctor was talking too many levels up.  This was new, and Stone did not like it one bit.

“Absolutely, sir, it’s dark, that’s all,” he soothed - kind of sneering, actually, because he could just imagine how hard Robotnik’s lip would curl if he ever heard him soothing for real.  “Now let’s get you in the escape pod and get you out of here.”

“Escape pod?”

“Yup.”  He got the doctor to sit up, then to stand.  Then folded him into the tiny capsule and repeated the instructions one last time.  “Just stay put.  I will track you.  Stay.  Put.  You understand me?”

The doctor raised one hand in a weary salute and then slumped back.  Out again.

It was probably better that way anyway. Stone gave the device its instructions, remotely detonated several of the destroyed robot’s remaining missiles for a distraction, and sent it off.

He followed on foot, quick and careful.  He got out of the rubble without being seen, got into the woods, and followed the tracker on his wrist until he found the capsule out of power about a mile away, as expected.

Perhaps not so equally expected, Robotnik had wandered off.  He hadn’t gotten far at least.  Stone heard him flailing around and grumbling, and got to him just in time to catch him as he collapsed.

So the doctor was not thinking clearly - maybe not thinking at all.  It was up to Stone to be the brains of the operation for the moment, and he could be.  He neatly shut away any feelings of worry and focused on the problems, which were substantial but certainly not the worst set of problems he had ever faced.  He and the doctor were both alive, and they were together.  He could get them to a hideout and go from there.  Everything was going to be fine.

TBC.

Chapter Text

“Don’t lie to me, Stone,” he snarled.  His voice came out weak and thin – like an old man’s, or a kid about to cry.  He coughed and tried again.  “I’ve seen you-… put stitches in.”

“Yeah well, this isn’t just a matter of a couple of stitches, Doctor.”  Stone’s voice sounded much more sure.  And hard.  “I took a look, a real look, and my conclusion is that you need a hospital.  Now.”

He bit back a groan as intense, intense pain rolled through his abdomen.  How was that possible?  He was already in maximum pain, it shouldn’t be possible for it to be getting any worse.

“Sorry,” Stone said, as he tortured him in ice cold blood.  “But we need to put the pressure back on, until we can get you somewhere that can actually put you back together again.  Doctor!” he barked suddenly.  “Hey.  Stay with me.”

“I’m with you, I’m with you,” he murmured into the dark.  “Where the hell-.  Would I go.”

“Open your eyes.  Now.  I need to talk to you.”

He made himself obey.  “What.”

“I’m taking you to a hospital.  Shut up,” he added, “I am.  But there’s every chance the hospitals are on the lookout for you, and we get arrested the minute we walk through the doors.”

He snorted.  (His eyes drifted closed again, but that was all right.  He was awake, Stone had to see that.).  “You can-… drop me-.  At the curb.  I won’t take it personal.”

“Doctor.  Come on.”  Stone actually shook him, injuries notwithstanding.  “I am not leaving you.  Don’t even talk like that.  All I’m saying is-… hey.  Open your eyes.”

He growled, but made himself do it.  “What.”

“All I’m saying is, we’re probably facing prosecution here.  So we need to get married before we go.”

He listened to that, played it over again in his mind, and it clicked all of a sudden and drove all the fog away.  “What?”

“You heard me, sir,” he said simply.  “Spousal privilege means they can’t force us to testify against each other.  It’s one less tool in their toolbox, we’d be idiots not to take care of it.”

It was clear that Stone was serious.  And he wasn’t wrong.  Still.

Robotnik swallowed, took a second to get his strength up, and then managed a full clear sentence.  “If this is your idea of a courtship plan, Agent, you’re worse at romance than I am.”

“It’s not funny.  Will you cooperate?  I can clean you up, but if you don’t look willing and compos mentis they’ll throw us out anyway.”

It’s a rare day when I can pass for compos mentis.  But he didn’t have it in him to keep cracking wise.

“Doctor.  Hello?  Answer me.  What, are you saving yourself for another fiancé?  Come on.  Yes or no.”

It wasn’t irritation in Stone’s voice underlying this uncharacteristic impatience – it was worry.  And based on the blood loss and the deteriorating vital signs, Robotnik couldn’t exactly blame him.

He managed a nod.  “Okay.  Yes.  Fine.”

“All right.  I’m going to get you stabilized and clean.   You get on my burner phone – no more using our real devices, if we want any chance at all of getting away here – and find me the best route to a judge and then a hospital.  Can you do that?”

He nodded.  There was a plan.  He wasn’t dying.  This was all part of a plan.

“Hey,” he managed to say, as Stone shoved a sad piece of consumer electronics into his hands.  “One thing.”

“What?”  Already gloving up again.

“If you-.  Want a-.  Down-on-one-knee proposal?  Gonna have to do it yourself.”

TBC.

Chapter Text

Stone stuffed him into a black sweater and slacks, which would hopefully hide the blood if the dressing got soaked through.  He dozed a little in the car, despite the constant elbowing and shouting that was meant to keep him up, and when they arrived wherever they were, he took Stone’s arm like the enamored bridegroom he was supposed to be – in order not to fall over.

Stone lied proficiently to some sort of secretary, who put them down for an appointment when they didn’t have one, and they got a marriage license.  Then they were in front of a County Clerk – not even a judge, a fact that made him feel slightly cheated, but he wasn’t exactly in a position to be choosy.  “A joyous day,” the clerk said to them.  Smiling so wide Robotnik wanted to headbutt him.

“Speak for yourself,” he snapped.

Stone nudged him and smoothed his comment over.  “What he means is this wedding is kind of bittersweet for us – we got some bad medical news today, and we just… didn’t want to wait.  So here we are.  Life is short.”

And will be shorter if you don’t hurry up, Robotnik sniped in his mind, but he kept his mouth shut while the clerk mouthed stupid platitudes of sympathy at them for his supposed fatal illness, whatever it supposedly was.

He stood where he was told and listened to the ceremony, pared-down from weddings he’d heard before but still longer than he would have preferred to stand unassisted.

But he managed.  Then it was time for the vows.  Repeat after me.  I, Ivo Robotnik…

“I, Ivo Robotnik-…”  That was as far as he got before his voice caught.  Somehow, making a declaration himself in his own name, while looking into Stone’s worried-puppy eyes, affected him more than he’d anticipated.  He coughed and tried again.  On the second try it came out better.

He got through the vows all right – though Stone did better, inveterate lying secret agent that he was – and hoped that the ordeal would then be over.

It wasn’t.  “And if there’s anything additional that you would like to say to each other…?”

The clerk was beaming at them for the moment, but surely if they failed to act infatuated enough he would become suspicious.

Luckily, Stone stepped up.  He reached out and seized both Robotnik’s hands, and cleared his throat.  “I don’t know how long we have,” he said at last, quiet and serious, “But I am ready to make the most of every second with you.”  He gave a smile – sad, as befit their cover story, but added a wink on the side the clerk couldn’t see.

Robotnik wasn’t sure what declarations to make back.  Finally he just went with that.  “I never saw myself getting married,” he said truthfully.  “So I don’t know what to say, beyond I do.  That’s the best I’ve got.”

The clerk seemed satisfied.   “Then by the authority vested in me by the state of Montana, I now pronounce you husbands for life.  You may seal your union with a kiss.”

Stone leaned in without any hesitation.  He put a hand on the jaw, tilting the face forcibly to the right angle, and Robotnik got a firm dry kiss on the mouth.

Which was not unpleasant, actually.  Huh.

He ruminated on that, and worked hard not to faint, while Stone finished up the formalities and accepted a red rose from the secretary lady, and got them back into the car.

He slept on the way to the hospital too.  Even though Stone was almost frantic in his efforts to prevent it.

TBC.

Teehee so they are married now!  Congrats to them I suppose.   Now here goes the wedding night…

Chapter Text

Stone spent the hours of the surgery skulking around the hospital stealing supplies and studying the lay of the land – which nurses were dangerously alert, which stairwells were deserted enough to move around in, where visitors were and weren’t.

Once Robotnik was returned to the recovery room, Stone switched him out for an unconscious patient whose family had already left for the day.  That was better – now, if police came asking about new patients, they would be directed somewhere else.

As soon as the doctor had regained even a shred of consciousness, Stone congratulated him on survival and proposed taking off.  Robotnik got as far as blessing the plan with a nod before conking back out again.

It seemed good enough.  Stone had already changed into scrubs and a stolen nametag.  He loaded the doctor into a wheelchair, got him more or less awake again via pin under fingernail, and headed out.

In the car the doctor read his file and begged for stimulants when he couldn’t get through it.  “Just a little something from the goody bag,” he said.  “Just for a minute.  I just… want to know…”

“There’s nothing you have to read right now,” Stone assured.  “I skimmed the information before we left and we can take our time with it when we get to the hotel.”   He had booked a place two hours away.  “Just rest, okay?”

“Gloria Gaynor.”

“What?”

“Then Eye of the Tiger.  Then – um –”

He finally caught up to the doctor’s drugged-out train of thought.  “Are you putting together a pump-up playlist about not dying?” he guessed finally.  “You really don’t have to do that.  Surgery went great – as long as we aren’t messing it up by moving you.  Just rest, okay?  That’s really all you need to do right now.”

“Mrrr.  You’re not the boss of me.”

He sighed.  “It’s too bad they took love honor and obey out of the vows or I would be.”

Robotnik’s eyes opened.  “I’ve been dreaming – did we get married today?  Don’t laugh,” he added, “It was that or cave diving.  I’ve been seeing both.”

“We did get married,” Stone said steadily.  “Just as a precaution, in case we get arrested.”  (If he’d pretended for a moment that it was anything else, that was nobody’s business but his.).

Robotnik snorted.  “Mazel tov.”  He finally relaxed and drifted back into his druggy sleep.

At the motel the doctor needed help getting out of the car.  He was awake now, truly awake, as the drugs wore off enough for pain to start setting in.  Stone helped him up the stairs and into the room – dismal and anonymous, the sort of room you stayed in for as few hours as humanly possible - and onto the bed.  (There was only one; Stone had checked in as a single adult because the doctor was too memorable to sneak past people effectively.).

“Take that hospital gown off and lie down,” he ordered.  “I’ll be right back.”  In the bright fluorescent light of the bathroom he laid out the medicines and supplies he’d amassed and looked them over.   Not a bad haul – he could probably, probably see the doctor’s recovery through without sticking his head out again.  Which gave them a lot more freedom in how and where to run.

He washed his hands and grabbed up a couple of things to start with – including some painkillers; the doctor was probably about to get real cranky real fast – and headed back out into the bedroom.

In the doorway he froze.  Robotnik was sprawled out on the bed naked… giving him an eyeful of pale skin and white gauze and red, red, red.

TBC.

More tomorrow, hopefully!

Chapter Text

For just a moment, his heart jumped up into his throat and blocked all attempts to breathe.

Then the doctor smirked at him and said: “Happy Honeymoon, amore mio,” and his brain became unstuck.

Not blood.  Rose petals – Robotnik had shredded the rose from the County Clerk’s people and scattered it around himself.

He swallowed.  “Stop messing around,” he said severely, because the worry of today had already taken years and years off his life and it was beyond cruel to inflict more of it on him for no reason.

Robotnik frowned.  “I thought we might be better off with a little humor,” he said, almost mumbling, looking down at himself.

“Well we’re- we’re not.”  Stone swooped down to the bed and nudged him flat onto his back so that he could check that the dressing was still clean and intact.  “You scared me half to death today and I’m not going to be ready to joke about it for a long long long time.”  On some level he knew it wasn’t the doctor’s fault, but once the dam had broken he couldn’t stop.  “When I found you I thought you were dead.  You weren’t breathing and blood was everywhere.  You have organ damage.  You have serious-”

“Hey.  Whoa.  No.”  Robotnik snatched his hand and pulled it away from the wrap.  “Agreed: organ damage is not funny.  I wasn’t talking about that.”

He blinked.  “Then what?”

Robotnik heaved a sigh.  Reached over, picked up a rose petal and flicked it at him.  “Our wedding night, you idiot.”

Our…?

Was he still messing around?  Or could it be that somehow he was actually serious?

No matter; the answer was the same.  “I’m the idiot?” he almost yelled.  “You cannot seriously be talking about sex right now?”

Robotnik shrugged.  “I mean, in my day if you wouldn’t perform your wifely duties they’d annul your marriage,” he said.  “I didn’t go to all that effort today just to have my work undone.”

His work?  Stone was the one who had thought up, orchestrated and carried out the whole thing.  Wrapped the doctor’s oozing abdomen and carried him into the car and prayed that the detour wouldn’t kill him.  And now…?

“What?” Robotnik said, with an expression Stone only belatedly realized was concern.

What?  What was there to be concerned about?  What was the matter?  “Doctor,” he said, but then his voice stopped working and he burst into tears.

TBC.

I mean Stone has had a really rough day.  On top of a really rough year.

Chapter Text

His Agent, his rock (ha), was falling apart in front of him and the best he could come up with was: “Stone?”

“Fuck,” Stone wheezed between sobs, looking as shocked and dismayed as Robotnik felt himself.  “Fuck I’m sorry.”

Robotnik scowled.  He wanted an explanation, not an apology.  But Stone didn’t register his dissatisfaction at all.

Fine.  It was not likely to be possible to handle this lying down, so he dragged himself to the edge of the bed, let his legs down and made himself sit up.

Engrained habit had Stone scrambling to help him even in the midst of hysterics.  They grabbed at each other and somehow got him standing.  There, he would have said, except Stone preempted all speech by throwing arms around him and clinging like a terrified koala, sobbing into his chest.

Okay.  “You… need a hug?” he guessed at last.  Stone seemed to be suffering some sort of emotional breakdown, and unless he was going to share any of his precious sedatives, a hug was the best medicine available.

He got what seemed to be a nod.  Okay.

Asking a man in crisis to sit tight while he found something to wear seemed a little insensitive, so he leaned over and hit the lightswitch to at least render his nakedness less distracting.  That turned out to be a good move all around; the room was a lot friendlier and more soothing in the dark.

The box of light from the bathroom was still more than enough to see by.  He found Stone’s shoulders without difficulty and sat him down on the bed.  Stone pitched over to lie facedown instead, sobbing into a pillow, so Robotnik lay down next to him and gathered him in to his chest.

“Better,” he proclaimed.  “Shh.  It’s okay.”

The crying finally coalesced into words, which made responding to it much easier.

“I almost lost you.”

“But you didn’t – I’m right here.”

“I was so afraid you were going to die.”

“Well I didn’t; you did a great job and we got it all taken care of.”

Did this always happen after near-death experiences?  Somehow he would have thought Stone more resistant to them, being a secret agent and all.

“Doctor I can’t lose you again,” Stone gasped out.  “I can’t do it again.  I can’t.  I can’t.”

Again?  Ah.  The meltdown made a lot more sense suddenly – of course one close shave wouldn’t be enough to rattle Stone this badly.  “Are you thinking about when I went away?” he guessed.

Stone nodded violently against him.  “I can’t.”

“Okay.  Understood.  Got it.”  He rubbed Stone’s back with more purpose now; now he actually did get it.  He’d had a couple of these meltdowns himself, all alone in his mushroom kingdom.  They just had to run their course.

“I need you, I missed you, I missed you so much, I’m in love with you okay and I’m sorry!  I just, can’t.”

“Okay, okay, shh, you don’t have to,” he soothed.  (Violently envious; there had been no one to offer him such reassurances when he wailed.).  “It’s okay.  I’m here, I’m not going back there, or anywhere, and I didn’t die, it’s okay.  Everything’s fine.”

“I’m sorry,” Stone kept saying, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, please don’t go, I’m sorry.”

Bewildering.  It was truly bewildering; he’d offered hysterical apologies of his own to a rock a couple of times, but those were definitely deserved.  I’m sorry I pretended I didn’t need you, I’m sorry I had you cancel dinner and work on your birthday, I’m definitely sorry I never helped you make the coffee.  I’m sorry the last thing I ever said to you was get out of my way.

What on earth could Stone be apologizing for?

On second thought, did it matter?  “It’s okay,” he kept saying, “It’s okay, I promise, I’m not going anywhere.  Look, I even married you, you’ve got me, I’m right here.  I’m here.”  He’d never given Stone a real hug before and was surprised to discover how well they fit together – how his arm folded perfectly around Stone’s back, holding him in with authority like he had any idea what he was doing.

Clueless or not it seemed to be working, though: the crying was slowing down.

When it finally stopped, Stone sniffed in and said hoarsely: “Talk to me?”

About what, he almost asked, but then he realized it probably didn’t matter.  In his exile he had played messages over and over again just to hear a familiar voice.

“The turning point came when I decided to stop trying to repair my ship, and cannibalize her for parts to make a beacon instead.”

Stone went still.  “You’re going to- tell me how you got off the mushroom planet?” he sniffled.  Kind of hopefully.

”Mm-hm.  You want to hear it?”

An energetic nod.  More sniffling.

Okay.  Robotnik settled in and started talking.   It was nice to have an attentive audience – an audience who, unlike Stone-Stone, could chime in with noises of wonder at appropriate times and ask follow-up questions.  What did you make the rope out of?  How did you know what frequency to use?

Robotnik talked and talked and talked, until eventually Stone’s snuffly breaths smoothed out and became snores.

There.  He sighed in the dark.  “Congratulations to us.”

TBC.

Okay next chapter will be happier.  Promise!

Chapter Text

He woke up from a fragmented, bloody dream to find himself in an unfamiliar bed lying in the arms of an unfamiliar partner.

Not an unfamiliar partner.  The doctor.

It came rushing back fast: searching through the wreckage of the robot, the wedding, the hospital.  The hotel and the awful nervous breakdown he’d had here.

At least I kept it together long enough to get us somewhere safe, he tried to tell himself, but it was cold comfort.  Not only had he admitted feelings out loud, he’d let himself become visibly, utterly wrecked by them in the doctor’s presence. 

“I see you’ve rejoined the land of the living,” Robotnik said.

“Yeah.”  He tried to brace up.  Wondered how bad it was going to be.

But Robotnik was cheerful.  “Just in time!  We only have a couple minutes left of wedding night – it’s about twenty to twelve.”

Again he wondered: could the doctor be serious?  He tried to think of how to answer.

Apparently he thought for too long – before he could say anything, he felt Robotnik’s body stiffen underneath him.  “I took the hearts in my coffee to mean that your feelings are romantic.  Are they not?”

He panicked at the sense of the doctor withdrawing.  “No!  No no no no, you’re right, I’m in love - I’m all the way in love, totally in love, in every possible way.  Please don’t have any doubt about that.”  It was hard to just say it, after so long keeping it secret, but apparently silence was sending a very wrong message.  “It’s just…”.  I thought you would fire me for it.  Or worse.  “-…I just never thought that was something you were looking for.”

“I wasn’t looking for it.  I haven’t had a crush since I was a teenager and my sex drive kicks in barely once a year.”  He was still tense.  “But when you kissed me at the ceremony today, I liked it.  Didn’t you?”

Stone thought about it.  “No,” he said at last, too worn out to lie.  “There was blood on your breath.  You reeked of it.  I almost panicked right there.”

“Hmph.  Fair enough.”  The doctor jostled him lightly.  “Luckily, since then I’ve stopped bleeding and eaten some hospital jello.  So.”  He reached for Stone’s jaw again.

The question of nutrition distracted him.  “Doctor, we really need to get you some actual-”

Robotnik silenced him by crushing their faces together in a kiss.   Stone melted into it immediately (terrible angle and all), and the doctor capitalized on his cooperation to roll over on top of him.

But as he did there was a slight catch of breath.  Stone twisted away to say “Careful-…”

And Robotnik growled at him.  “Stay in your lane.  I’ve got it under control.”

He swallowed.  All he wanted on earth was to say yessir and stop worrying, but he’d rather get yelled at than risk a medical setback.  “Are you sure?”, he asked, resting a hand lightly on Robotnik’s waist.  “Normally I wouldn’t ask, but you were pretty heavily drugged.  Is your thinking okay?”

Robotnik sighed in his ear and didn’t yell.  “Yes.  But if you’re a good boy I’ll let you check the dressing again later, just in case.  All right?”

Another kiss – this time with tongue, hard wet tongue pushing into his mouth and storming around like it owned the place.  He said mmm and sucked on it, pretty much helpless to do anything else.

When they finally separated Robotnik whispered: “Better?”

“So much better,” he whispered back.  “It’s perfect.”  The doctor was back and alive and in charge again, and it was all Stone could think to want for himself…

Which made him think.  “Doctor, what do you want?” he asked, against his jaw.  Darted his tongue out to lick against the throat.  “I don’t know what you like.  Or what you’re okay to do right now.”  He laughed a little.  “I didn’t ask your surgeons about this.”

“I did.”  Robotnik found his mouth again and bit it.  “They okayed gentle intimate touching but I’m not supposed to actually fuck.”

Stone gasped a little at the doctor talking like that – and Robotnik took that opportunity to shove his tongue in again.   Only briefly, though – he soon switched gears and started nipping and sucking his way down Stone’s neck – hard and greedy and efficient, like he did everything.

It was intense and delicious.  It was going to leave a trail of bruises.  It was… probably not the gentle intimate touching the surgeons had had in mind.

Stone made himself push away.  “Hey.  Wait.”

Robotnik paused, and took teeth from collarbone.  “Yes?”

“It’s.  It’s.  Fuck.  We can’t do that.”  He wriggled away, money where his mouth was.  “Lie down,” he said, and used force to urge Robotnik flat.  “Let me take care of you.  I can do gentle – I promise.   Tonight’s for that.  When you’re better we can do everything else – literally any thing whatsoever that you want – but only when you’re okay for it.”  He was calm and steady and would brook no argument.  “I cannot risk hurting you.  You saw me before.  I can’t.”

A deep sigh.  Then finally, after so long Stone was almost beginning to worry, the doctor brought a hand up to cup his face…

…And then slid it down to grip his chin uncomfortably hard.  “Don’t bore me, Stone.”

That was yes.  He went dizzy with relief.   “Of course not, Doctor.”  He pulled the hand off, kissed it, and then slithered down the bed.

TBC.

Yay, they're finally hooking up!  Sorry we faded to black.  We'll get a little detail next chapter at least.

Chapter Text

Pain dragged him out of a deep, dreamless sleep.  The process was slow and terrible, as he gradually came to accept that the pain was (1) real, (2) unrelenting, and (3) actually getting worse. 

Finally he opened his eyes, and took stock.  The bad news was that he was wrapped in bandages in a seedy motel, exhausted even though the grey coming in around the curtains said it was nearly time to get up.

The good news was that he was on earth.  In a bed.  Tangled up with his worryingly softhearted assistant, who had married him yesterday and then broken down in his arms weeping and saying I love you.

Robotnik was only about ninety-seven percent sure that that hadn’t all been a hallucination, brought on by some combination of blood loss and overzealous administration of anesthesia.  Maybe compounded by withdrawal symptoms, too; he’d cut his psychoactive mushroom consumption to zero overnight and it was entirely possible his body had something to say about that.

But last night was awfully vivid to have been nonexistent.  Especially that blow job there at the end.

It was, of course, a blow job Robotnik should never have allowed.   At the hospital he had been told in no uncertain terms that sex of any kind would have to wait, that even in the unlikely event his body could muster a state of sexual readiness it would be beyond his ability to do anything about it, and if somehow he tried anyway it would only hurt. 

Well.  He’d shown them.  He’d gotten hold of some erection pills and somehow talked Stone into getting busy, and maybe it had impeded his recovery a little but honestly he did not regret a second.

Now all that remained was to solve all their unsolvable problems. 

Luckily, Ivo Robotnik was good at solving unsolvable problems.  He popped a painkiller from the nightstand, gathered Stone in tighter—his hair made an excellent fidget toy—and started thinking.

“Morning, darling.”  The doctor woke him by teasing.

It took him only a second this time to orient himself.  Motel.  The injuries.  Right.

“How are you, Doctor?”

The doctor considered a moment and then ticked off a status report.  “Sore and pretty hungry.  Not so well rested.  Very well sexed.  Yourself?”

“Uh-.”  He scrambled up to sitting.  “Well let’s get you something to eat, we can-”

“Zzzt.”  The doctor pinched his words off in the air.  “Something wrong with your hearing, there, Agent?  I asked how you’re doing.  I married you, remember?” he added.  “I’m allowed to ask you personal questions now.”

That was startling, actually - the idea that the marriage might mean something to Robotnik had never even crossed his mind.  A pointless institution, he would have expected the doctor to sneer.

But now here he was using it as a justification for involvement.  And sex.

“I’m, uh.  Mildly sore, barely hungry, medium rested and highly sexually aroused,” Stone recited.  Then went for it.  “Also happy, because you’re here.”

“Hmph.”  The doctor’s mustache wiggled.  “And what about scared, because we’re on the run and Uncle Sam’s best are in hot pursuit?”

He thought about it.  “I’m not scared,” he decided.  “Now that you’re okay I know you’ll think of something.”

“Oh, stop.”  Robotnik smacked him lightly upside the head.  “Blind faith is embarrassing.  Do better.”  He seemed pleased, though.  And sure enough, a moment later he smirked.  “As it so happens… I do have a little bit of a plan.”

“Which is?”

Robotnik shifted to get on top of him.  “Well,” he said, looking at Stone’s mouth, “Let’s worry about the first step first, and we’ll get to the rest later.”

He kissed - hard - and then moved the blanket out of the way.  Looked Stone over and licked his lips.

“Uh-… and the first step is… is what?”  Trying not to get his hopes up.

“I’ll see if you can figure it out.”

TBC.

I think just one more chapter now.  Let me know what you think!

Chapter Text

He didn’t want to guess wrong.  “Come on, Doctor - what are you doing?” he finally managed to say, as the doctor kissed his way down his body.

Robotnik looked up in startlement.  “I am reciprocating,” he said.  “Obviously.  I understand oral is a great favorite of yours.”

“Oral- but- really?” he sputtered at last. “Seriously?  You’d do that?”

“Mm-hm,” Robotnik said brightly, and ducked down to get started.

“W-wait,” Stone gasped, as he felt the very first brush of lips.  “I don’t want you doing anything you don’t want to,” he said.  “You used to… express… disdain, about oral.”  Which was putting it mildly.  And we’re dealing with this idiot because the FORMER director got FIRED for getting a BLOW JOB in the OFFICE, Robotnik had screamed on one memorable occasion – around a very full conference table.  Which should tell us everything we need to know about their department!  Work, what work?  Why work?  Why WORK, when we can instead spend the workday putting our MOUTHS on each other’s GENITALS and LICKING THEM!  With a slobbery, obscene tongue gesture that Stone was never ever going to forget.

“I, uh.”  Robotnik cleared his throat.  “I used to express disdain about a lot of things.”

Understatement of the year.  He laughed and reached down to find Robotnik’s hand and squeeze it.  “Yes you did, sir.”

He felt Robotnik go still. 

Uh-oh.  “I- No no, I didn’t mean- anything,” he swore, scrambling to sit up.  “I’m sorry, I didn’t.  Mean anything.”  It wasn’t clear how he had offended but clearly he had.  And right at the worst possible moment in the universe.

“Stone.”  Measured and careful.

“Yes, Doctor?”  Quick and attentive, as always.  And trying not to panic.  He would fix it, whatever it was.

But it turned out that what it was didn’t need fixing.  “The things I used to say to you,” Robotnik began, but then trailed off with a sigh of frustration.  He shook his head and started again.  “Look.  When I was away I did a lot of thinking,” he said instead, hard and matter of fact, “And I realized that my thinking about you was a lot… kinder than my actual treatment had been.”  He almost choked on the word.  “I hope you understand that I do value you.  And always did.  Even though I stand by every word I’ve ever said about what a moron you can be sometimes.”

He was suddenly lightheaded; there was a buzzing in his ears.   It was far and away the best declaration the doctor had ever made him and he couldn’t handle it.  He was going to cry.

The doctor would kill him if he cried.  It was a miracle he hadn’t killed him already.  Joke about it, he ordered himself desperately.  “So you’re saying-…”  So you’re saying I’m only sometimes a moron?  but he was too choked up.

“I’m saying I missed you, Stone,” Robotnik said, almost irritated.  “May I suck your cock now?”

The buzzing intensified.  He couldn’t even answer, only stare slack-jawed, but Robotnik went ahead anyway.  Ducked down and engulfed him in wet heat, suddenly and damn near all the way.

“Oh god-” he said involuntarily.  He was definitely going to faint.

Luckily he got a breather; the doctor pulled off for a minute to lick at him daintily and tap with his fingers.  “And on a more practical note,” Robotnik said, “To answer your question, yes I was a little squeamish about sex things in the past.  But it turns out that eight unwashed months of sleeping in dirt and eating fungus will alter your sensibilities a little.”  Lick.  Lick.   Then hands on Stone’s thighs to hold him down for another big, deep suck.

“Oh god.”

The doctor pulled off again.  “I think at this point there is very little, sexually, I wouldn’t try.  With the right partner.  Which you are.”  And he dived down to suck again.

Stone was in heaven for about ten seconds.

And then a phone buzzed from the nightstand.

Very unfortunate timing.  Robotnik crawled up the bed (with difficulty; he really, really should not be moving around like this), looked over at his phone and read the text.  There in five.

Well.  Five minutes was probably enough to finish what they were doing – Stone was pretty worked up already.

Or, had been, before.  He didn’t seem to have sex on the brain anymore now, though.  He was staring in blank horror.  “Doctor that’s your-… your real phone.  Not the burner.”

“That’s right.”

“You texted someone with your real phone?  Are you out of your mind?”

“Probably.  But yes: I texted someone with my real phone.  Someone who is going to help us.”

“Who?  No one is going to help us, everyone thinks we’re the bad guys, I told you that.  No one – no one is going to help us!”  His voice was rising.  “And now that you’ve texted from your actual phone the government can find us here.  We have to get out of here – now.  How long ago did you send the message?”

“Stone.  Stone.  Stone.”  He shook his head, fondly.  “Don’t worry about those idiots.  Didn’t you tell me you weren’t scared, because you knew I’d think of something?  Well you were right: I thought of something.  And it’s going to be fine.”

Stone was sitting up in bed now.  “Who did you contact, Doctor?”  At least he hadn’t gotten up though.

Robotnik glanced over at the phone.   Four minutes.  “I’ll tell you after we’re done here,” he said, and put his hand back on Stone’s hip.

“Doctor.”  Stone reached down and pushed him away.

He pouted.  He couldn’t remember the last time Stone had refused him anything; normally he just bulldozed ahead anyway.  In this particular case, though, he really couldn’t do that.

Maybe reason instead.  “Look at it this way,” he said.   “Either I’m right, and there’s nothing to worry about, or I’m not – which by the way is completely unfathomable, but I’ll allow you to entertain the thought experiment – and in that case we’re about to be arrested and separated for the rest of our lives anyway.  We might as well take advantage of this while we can.”

Stone gaped at him but of course said nothing; there was no possible way to fault his logic.

So he pressed on.  “You’re ready to make the most of every second with me, isn’t that what you told that wannabe judge yesterday?  We have about three and a half minutes’ worth of seconds – are you ready to make the most of them or not?”

“I-I just-.  This is so stressful.  How am I supposed to…?”

Hm.  He swung a leg over to straddle Stone’s lap.  Grabbed him hard by the face.  “Look at me,” he ordered.  “I have told you that there is nothing to be stressed about.  Do you hear me?”

Stone swallowed.  “I hear you, Doctor.”

“Then stop.  Worrying.”  He waited until he got a nod.  “Good.  Now lie down, and spread your legs.”

Stone shuddered and breathed oh god.  And when Robotnik climbed off him, he did as he was told.

“There we go,” Robotnik said, oversweetly.  “That’s better.  Isn’t it better, Stone?”  He bent down to pick up where he’d left off.

Stone didn’t take the whole three minutes.  He didn’t take a whole two minutes even.  Almost immediately he was squirming around and whimpering helplessly (“Doctor doctor doctor,” over and over, like it was the only thought in his head.  It probably was.  They were definitely going to do this more often.), and because they were short on time Robotnik tried a few things and figured out what would work fastest.  It turned out to be gentle sucking while his hands grabbed with bruising force at the hips, thighs, waist.  It was probably leaving marks.  He certainly hoped so.

Stone came in his mouth, with a throaty noise through closed lips.  Robotnik enjoyed it.  He especially liked that Stone had not asked permission; it was a huge ego stroke to know that he had blown his agent straight out of professionalism and into insubordination instead.

“There,” he said, as soon as he’d swallowed - before Stone could start apologizing, or worrying, or talking about love, or whatever other fool thing he was planning to do.  “Now: we don’t have much time left before they get here.”

Stone still hadn’t caught his breath.  “Who?” he panted.  “Who’s coming, Doctor?”

“People,” he said.  “Human beings.  Human beings from earth, who would rather make common cause with me, another human being from earth, against the dangerous alien life forms that have invaded our planet and harnessed ultimate power they could use to destroy us.”

“Invaded?”  Stone snorted.  “You brought that red thing here yourself.”

“A fact our guests most certainly do not need to know.”

Stone nodded up at the ceiling.  He understood.  “And by guests you mean… who exactly?”

Before he could decide whether to answer or not, there was a knock on the motel room door.

He jumped up, delighted.  Surprises were always fun.

He told Stone to stay put, and threw the door open clad in just a towel and some bandages.  “Good morning!” he gushed.

“Morning,” Walters said tersely.

“Walters?” Stone, from the bed.  Almost shrieking.

Walters leaned to look past his shoulder into the room.  “Stone?”

“No.”  Robotnik swung around (mistake!  No more twisting.   God no more twisting) and made eyebrows.  “At least: I assume no.  You’re taking my name, right?”  Then he turned back.  “We got married yesterday.  I believe tradition dictates you still have 364 days to send us a gift.”

Walters coughed.  “You-.  Ah.  Oh.  Oh, I see.”  He leaned further for another look.  Robotnik let him – showing off his lover lying there all naked and debauched was satisfying in a primal kind of way.   (Somehow, the fact that Stone was covering himself with a cheap motel sheet made him look even more naked and debauched than he would otherwise.  Robotnik noted that for future.).

“So if there’s nothing else?  I need to get back to it.”

Walters coughed again.  “Um, I, I understand, but.  Well… damn it, Ivo, we need you back at work.  Those things are still out there and everyone is very, very antsy for someone to do something about it.”

He narrowed his eyes.  Already they were back to their slave-driving.  Take take take, after they hadn’t lifted a finger for him for eight long months.  “I thought I made it clear that I need a little time.”  He backed up a step and spread his arms for a better view.  “I have an enormous hole in my guts, remember?”  He pointed to it.

“Which doesn’t seem to have stopped you from, uh.”  Walters glanced past him again.

Right.  Not much answer he could give other than to smirk.

Walters sighed deep.  Clearly, he knew he had no options.  “Look.  All right.  All right.  When I got married, they gave me forty-eight hours for a honeymoon.”

That was actually better than he’d expected.

“…And I swore I wouldn’t do that to the next guy.  Take seventy-two.”

“Thank you, sir,” Stone chirped from bed.

Robotnik sighed and called over his shoulder: “I was going to hold out for a full week!”  He said to Walters: “You’re lucky my husband is such an unfathomably nice guy.”

Walters actually smiled at him.  “Well.  He’d have to be.”  He nodded to them both and backed up a step.  “Gentlemen.”

“See you.”  Robotnik shut the door and turned back inside.  Seventy-two hours.  Time to make the most of it.

The End.

Well so this silly little thing ended happily.  Idle chatter on discord FTW!  Let me know what you thought.

(9/7:  If you are here looking for the update, it’s chapter 1, the beginning.).