Chapter Text
"Please welcome, Harry Styles," Ellen cheered. She stood from her chair as I walked onto the stage and waved at the audience. When I reached her I kissed both her cheeks before waving to the crowd again and sitting. She waits for them to stop clapping and cheering before talking. "Welcome back. How are you?" I nodded,
"Yeah I'm-I'm good."
"We have a lot to talk about. This is the first interview you've done in 10 months. A lot can change in that time ," she says suggestively.
"Lots," I agree.
"Let's start with the most recent news. You gave birth to a healthy 6lb baby boy just two months ago, congrats!"
"Yeah, thanks," I smiled brightly.
"There he is," she adds when a picture of him comes up for the audience to see, "so small!" The crowd coos. "Now, I was told that I was allowed to ask anything because you wanted to set everything straight, yes?" I nodded in agreement and chuckled when the crowd cheered.
"Yes."
"You kept the baby a secret the whole time. So we all found out when you tweeted about the news just last night. Who did know?"
"My mother, daughter, and manager," I explain. It's true. I managed to keep the pregnancy quiet the whole time. No one suspected a thing. It meant I basically went into hiding when I started to show, but I preferred it.
"I'm going to talk about Louis now, okay?" She checked. I nodded and she added the extra information of us being exs. "Is he the father?" I nodded again, "and he didn't know?"
"No. He didn't. Olivia knew not to say anything."
"So he keeps in contact with Liv?"
"Yeah. They text every day and he calls her every night to say goodnight. He's like her second father. I wouldn't take that away from either of them," I explain.
"How do you think he will take the news? He's a father!"
"Well I'm sure he'll be angry at first," I shrug.
"Is he welcome to be in the baby's life?"
"Absolutely. I'd um-actually love for him to be," I state.
"We're going to jump back in time a bit back to all those months ago when you left his home never to return. What happened?"
"We actually just got into a stupid fight. Actually, it was mostly me yelling. Olivia was still being treated for her cancer-"
"She beat that, right? Congrats on that too."
"Thank you, yes. Um so I was having a hard time with everything and I sort of just put my life on hold and I realized Louis was doing the same, but I didn't want him to. I figured leaving was for the best," I explain.
"Was it hard?"
"Absolutely. I loved him."
"Loved? So you don't anymore?" She rose an eyebrow.
"No, I do. I love him with all my heart. Miss him everyday."
"So you regret it then?" She cleared up and I nodded. "I still have two last subjects to talk about so we will be right back with Harry." They cut to commercial and I take a sip of the water in front of me. "Okay?" She asked.
"Yeah," I sighed.
"I'm glad I could do your first interview," she smiled. I agreed and talked with her for another minute before they cued us back in.
"Welcome back. I'm here with Harry Styles talking about his new baby, his ex Louis and what the future holds. Now Harry," she turned to look at me, "you've kept the secret of the pregnancy until last night, but a name was not mentioned. So what did you name your baby boy?"
"William."
"Oh!" She gasps, "I love it! What was the reasoning?"
"L-Louis' middle name is William. I wanted him to have a part in this even if he isn't there. Plus he has the same blue eyes as Lou," I explained.
"That's amazing Harry, I'm sure Louis will appreciate that." I thanked her again as the audience clapped more. "Now Harry, have you gotten a chance to listen to Louis' new single? It just came out three weeks ago, so I know you've been busy. It's really good though. Already number one in multiple places."
"Wow, that's amazing! I actually haven't heard it. What's it called?"
"Where Do Broken Hearts Go," she smiled softly. I looked at her for a minute as I let it sink in.
"Sounds lovely," I got out.
"Give it a listen on your plane ride back. Thank you again for coming out," she was ending the interview. I nodded and thanked her before standing and kissing her cheek. I turned and thanked the audience, waving. I was escorted back to my dressing room where Niall was waiting. I flew out for the interview and am immediately flying back. I can't be away from William long.
"Feeling okay?" Niall asked as he grabbed my bag.
"How mad do you think he'll be?" I asked. He shrugged,
"I think he will just want to see Will."
"Really?" I asked hopefully. He nodded and told me, "let's go."
--
The flight was long and I couldn't wait to get home and just hold Will and rock him to sleep. It was already near seven so I knew William would be going down soon.
"I'm exhausted," I told Niall as I unlocked the door and stepped inside. I stopped immediately as he looked up to me and stood from the couch.
"H-hi," he said. I looked from him to his arms where William was being held.
"L-Louis?" I ask in surprise.
"Hi love," he says again. Love. Love. I might faint. Or cry. Or both.
"Hi," I say as the tears flow freely down my cheeks. He's here? "W-what are you doing here?"
"I um, I got on the next flight out of Australia as soon as I saw the tweet. I needed to see him, I'm sorry." I shook my head as I stepped down into the living room and slowly walked to them.
"Y-you're actually here," I mumbled stupidly.
"I'm here," he nodded.
"I-I missed you," I explain as I start sobbing. He turns and hands off William to my mum who I paid no attention to. The only person who mattered at the moment was Louis. He came. I fell into him as he wrapped his arms around me. "I'm so sorry," I sob.
"It's okay. We're going to figure everything out," he promised. I nodded in his neck as I pulled away. He gave me a small smile before turning to look at William again. "He's beautiful."
"I know," I agreed as I reached to take him from my mum. I had to hold him, it's been too long. "H-how long are you here? L-Livy would love to see you," I explain. She's not home, still at dance practice. He's only seen her once since our split. I was five months pregnant and we got the news that Olivia had officially beaten the cancer and Louis insisted on seeing her. He talked with my mum and set up her taking Olivia out to LA for half a week.
"I can't wait to see her," he nods. So he's staying for a bit? Good. "Can I hold him again?" I nod and hand him over before wiping at my face.
"Are you mad?" I ask as he sits back down and I join.
"No," he shakes his head, "I'm just glad to see him now." I watched him for a minute as he traced William's cheek.
"So uh- Australia? You took the role then?"
"What? Oh, no. You know Five Seconds of Summer?" I shook my head, "they're an Australian band. I wrote a song and I'm giving it to them."
"That's cool. I heard your song, on the way here," I explained.
"What did you think?" He asked as William let out a small whine before peeling open his eyes. "Oh wow," Louis whispered. William must have been asleep the whole time Louis has been here.
"I really liked it," I nodded, "he's probably hungry." I explain when Will starts crying.
"Okay, where's his bottle?"
"I um-you know. Breastfeed him," I explained.
"Oh! Oh right, here," he handed me William and looked to the floor. I moved William in my arms and used one hand to unbutton my shirt a little more. I hissed when he latched on, catching Louis' attention.
"Sensitive," I explain.
"I didn't know you could-do this," he chuckled.
"Comes with the pregnancy," I shrug.
"So you're basically a girl just with a dick?"
"Louis!" I say surprised, "no swearing in front of the baby!"
"Oi, his first word will be "fuck" if I stick around." I giggled and looked at him,
"A-are you sticking around?"
"If you'll let me, yeah. I'd really like to be in his life." I nodded,
"I would really like that too." We sat quietly for a minute until he sighed.
"Why didn't you tell me?" I shrugged and looked away ashamed, "I would have flew right over. You shouldn't have gone through the pregnancy alone. I would have came and taken care of you."
"I'm sorry," was all I could say.
"Are you happy?" I looked up at him confused, "I just want you happy. All three of you. Are you happy?" I shrugged,
"I'm decently happy." William pulled away so I moved him so I could button my shirt. "He'll probably fall asleep for a few minutes before waking up so I can change his diaper then he'll go down for about half the night."
"Harry," he sighed, "are you happy?"
"I could be happier," I shrugged.
"I'm going to go pick up Liv," Niall cut in. I thanked him and let Louis take William from me again. He rocked him to sleep within five minutes.
"Are you hungry? Have you ate? I-I can cook you something," I explained and wiped my sweaty hands on my jean clad thighs before standing up.
"I'd really appreciate that, thank you." I explained that he can put William in his swing or upstairs in his room and grab the baby monitor once he leaves. I left the room before he made a decision.
"Hi mummy," I whispered when I walked into the kitchen. She stood up for the kitchen table and smiled softly,
"You okay baby?" I nodded and fell into her embrace. "It's okay that I let him see Will, right?"
"Course," I agree and pull away. She kisses my cheek and tells me that she's going home tonight. She has been staying with me since William's been born and same as Niall. I think they felt it was necessary so I wouldn't fall into depression. I agreed and kissed her goodbye before starting to make dinner. I hadn't eaten either so I was a little hungry as well. I was left in the kitchen alone for at least a half hour until Olivia came running in.
"Hi daddy!" She cheered and hugged me.
"Hey princess, how was dance?" I asked and picked her up, setting her on the counter.
"Good. Missed you though. Is Will awake?"
"No, he's down," I explain, "did uncle Niall tell you who stopped by?" She looked at me confused and shook her head. As she did Louis walked in and smiled brightly.
"There's my little girl!"
"Papa!" She screamed happily and he swept her off the counter. "What are you doing here?"
"Came to see my babies," he explained and kissed all over her cheeks. She giggled and pushed him away,
"I'm not a baby!"
"Still my little princess," he chuckled and kissed her head. She settled in his arms, laying her head on his shoulder as he leaned against the counter. "I put Will upstairs," he told me. I nodded and put the lasagna in the over. I made a very small serving amount so it shouldn't take long.
"How long are you staying?" Olivia asked.
"I'm not sure yet," he explained. She yawned and smiled happily,
"I'm glad you're here. I missed you."
"I missed you too." He looked to me, catching my eyes. I looked away painfully. It was my fault. All of it.
Niall came in and insisted Olivia go shower and get ready for bed. She agreed after some bickering leaving just the three of us. Louis and Niall made small talk while I just listened. He asked Louis about his music career and Louis talked happily about it. I took advantage of the long plane ride home to read up about Louis' music career. His first single Where Do Broken Hearts Go has hit number one on iTunes, billboard, and has been the second most requested song on the radio for two months running. I have to admit that I really like the song. It's beautiful. I also read that there is talk of him working on an actual album, but that can lead to touring and other things and he's not sure what to do. I serve dinner as Olivia comes down to say goodnight to everyone. I kiss her head before she hugs Louis and Niall. She has school in the morning so she knows that she can't stay up late. Louis promises to see her tomorrow, so she goes upstairs easily.
"Are you staying here tonight?" Niall asks once we are all sat around the table.
"I have a hotel room," Louis shakes his head.
"Don't do that. Stay here," I finally speak up. He doesn't need to be paying for a hotel room, even if he can afford it with not thought, but I'd rather have him here. I want him here. He could meet someone and then bring them back to his hotel, or the check in girl thing could be cute and then something could happen and-
"Harry?" Louis chuckles.
"Sorry, what?"
"Are you sure it's alright if I stay?"
"I'd rather you stay," I explain. He nods and watches me for a minute before continuing eating. He cleans up for me after everyone is done and eventually Niall is sending me off to bed.
"You barely sleep, but now ya got two of us here. Sleep through the night," he told me. I shook my head,
"Wake me up when William cries if I don't hear him," I beg. He waves me off with a hand so I roll my eyes and go into my room. I'm beyond tired, so when I hit the bed I'm immediately out.
When I wake up and see that it's two in the morning I know why. William is crying and I can hear. I don't have the baby monitor seeing as Louis or Niall have it, but Will's room is right next to mine. I yawn and get up. I start to worry when they crying stops so I hurry over. I stop in the doorway when I find Louis standing in the middle of the room rocking William, back to me.
"Hey baby boy," I hear Louis say, "you're gonna wake up the whole house. What's wrong?" William is silent as Louis just watches him and rocks him. "God, baby, you're so cute. Can't believe daddy hid you from me. Silly daddy, huh?" William gurgles making Louis laugh. I hide quickly as Louis turns around. I hear him take a seat in the rocking chair and peak back in. The chair is in the corner so he could easily see me if he looked up, but his gaze is locked with the baby's in his arm. Louis starts to hum as he lays back in the chair and closes his eyes, rocking lightly. I recognize the beat immediately as his own song making me chuckle softly. I watch him for a few minutes as William falls asleep in his arms. I chew my lip and walk back to my room. I was beyond happy that he was here.
--
"Where is William?" I asked panicked as I rushed into Niall's room. It was eight in the morning and my alarm went off to wake Olivia for school once I did so I went into William's room to get him. Usually he is waiting in his crib quietly, wide awake just laying there. Today he wasn't. When I went downstairs to see if Louis was awake and had him, he wasn't.
"With Louis?" Niall suggests as he sits up trying to wake up.
"Where is Louis!? I swear if he took my son!"
"Harry, he wouldn't do that. Did you check Louis' room?" Which no, but only because he wasn't sure what room Louis chose to stay in. "He's in the spare next to yours," Niall answered my unasked question. I thanked him and hurried into Louis' room, not bothering to knock. It was my house anyways. I froze when I found Louis laying on his back, William tucked under his chin, both sound asleep. It was a beautiful site.
"Found him," Niall whispered behind me, "told you not to worry."
"I was overreacting," I chuckled. He agreed and we left them alone so I could go downstairs to start breakfast. It was weird not having William by my side, but Louis hasn't seen him, so I know he doesn't want to be away from Will for long.
"Daddy, can't I stay home? Papa is here and we could all go out and do something," Olivia pointed out as she came in. I looked her over. She was in a striped dress with a jean jacket. Her hair was short still, just above her shoulders. She had lost it all during her cancer battle, but it was growing back fast. She had a headband in to keep it from her face and sandals on.
"I'm sorry princess, but no. Papa will be here when I pick you up," I tell her.
"I'll pick you up if you want," Louis smiles as he comes in. William is swaddled and in Louis' arms. My heart starts to race. This is what I wanted. This is what I want forever.
"Yay!" Olivia cheers. She sits to start eating when I place her plate down then Louis'.
"He's probably hungry," Louis smiles as he gives William to me. I agree and head into the living room to breastfeed William. At least I have this time with him.
"Hey baby, missed you. Papa's been stealing you from me. Can't blame him," I chuckle. He latches onto my nipple and starts drinking. He's done in ten minutes so I place him in his swing and go to check in the kitchen. Louis and Olivia are messing around, giggling happily. She was happier with Louis hear, Will was happier with him head (even if he couldn't show it), and I was happier with him here. I wanted him to stay here. I needed him. He was home.