Chapter Text
“divinity will stain your fingers and mouth like a pomegranate. it will swallow you whole and spit you out, wine-dark and wanting. you will reach for it again and again, greedy human fingers clutching at everything you can reach. the divine will curl its way through your veins and take you over, and it will not leave you quietly. i feel divinity in my bones like aching; like fire.”
-noquietrevolution
CHAPTER ONE: SPRING BREAK
It’s said that if you have a mark, when your eyes lock with your soulmate’s, you will feel that connection light fire in your bones and your faded mark that is matched with your destined love will come to life.
When Riri was thirteen, she revealed hers to her best and only friend, Natalie, one night during a weekend sleepover as they watched anime on Adult Swim and devoured frozen pizza. Natalie had been fascinated with soulmarks because she didn’t have one.
“Oh hey, it’s a flower!” Natalie exclaimed as Riri lifted her pajama top a little to reveal the faded outline on her left side, right above her hip.
“It’s corny, right?” Riri asked shyly.
“What is it, a tulip? No, a rose!”
Riri shrugged. “My mom thinks it’s a lotus.”
“Watch your soulmate be a gardener though!”
The girls fell into a fit of giggles, and Riri tried to imagine her happily ever after with a soulmate who ran a city garden. The inventions that she could create to have those flowers bloom year-round, just to make whoever they were happy.
...
The one time that Riri had been hopeful that she met her soulmate was when the Princess of Wakanda entered her dorm room.
She had felt her mark itch for the first time in her life. It was more than being star-struck. When Shuri’s eyes gazed into hers, she felt breathless. When Riri led Shuri and Okoye to her garage later on, she snuck a look at her mark and was disappointed to see that it was still faded.
During the weeks that followed, Riri's mark itched every time she was around Shuri, which she couldn’t understand. Maybe it wasn’t the right time? Maybe it would all fall into place and finally burn once they got over all of this trauma? It had to be her. She had never felt her mark for her entire life until she had seen Shuri.
Her mark never gained color.
When they had said their goodbyes after Shuri returned to her lab from planting the synthetic heart-shaped herb, Riri felt her heart shatter a little when Shuri left her with one final embrace.
“Don’t be a stranger, okay?” Riri said, still not ready to leave her.
“Of course I won’t”, Shuri said, giving her a warm smile. “It kills me to use that technology, but I’ve already put my number in your iPhone. Reach out if you need anything at all. I mean it.”
“Okay”, Riri said, smiling weakly. She moved to turn away, but Shuri’s eyes fell to Riri’s exposed waist thanks to the crop top Shuri had let her borrow. Shuri gasped and looked like she had seen a ghost.
“That flower…” Shuri started.
“Oh, that. Yeah, I’m marked.” Riri went to cover it, ashamed that she had wanted it to be Shuri’s when it wasn’t. Ashamed that Shuri could see that it wasn’t hers.
“Do you have one?” Riri asked softly.
She was desperate to hear the confirmation. Maybe then the hope could die down in her head. Shuri stared at Riri for a long time, a mix of shock, sadness, and regret in her eyes.
Shit. She doesn’t have one and now I twisted the damn knife, Riri thought, horrified that she had even asked.
“It’s a comforting concept in theory”, Shuri said finally, pressing her mouth into a thin line. “I just find it hard to believe that fate determines who we were meant to be with when we’re born, and that we don’t have any say in it. What if that person ends up hurting you, but at the same time they’re still meant to be with you forever? What happens when you’re meant to protect someone, but it will never be good enough? How do you find peace that you’re destined to a soul no matter what?”
“I haven’t thought about it that way”, Riri whispered. “Maybe I’ll have a better answer to that someday.”
Shuri gave her a sad smile.
“Take care of yourself. I’ll look out for you, Riri. I promise you.”
Like all of her nightmares for the past six months, Riri drowns.
The Queen guides Riri behind her and away from Namor’s line of sight as his glare is focused on Ramonda only, his mouth turned in a furious snarl. The water bombs are thrown and penetrate the glass in seconds after Ramonda desperately tells Riri to leave. Riri’s body is thrown back, and all she can taste is saltwater and blood in her mouth as her head bangs against the floor, causing her to bite her tongue. She falls.
Her vision blurs in and out as she submerges deeper and deeper into the depths as glass drifts around her. She kicks her legs desperately trying to move up, but her entire body feels weighed down by her clothes. All she feels is her heart rate slowing, and the sensation of her nose and lungs burning while water fills her airways. As she tired and her eyes flickered shut, a frame cocooned her. Their strong arms wrapped securely around her waist as she propelled to the surface.
When she comes to and coughs up the water that had once filled her lungs, Riri prepares for what she knows will come next: Feet splashing all around her as frantic voices urge the Queen to wake up. Shuri’s horrible, gut-wrenching wails as she calls out to her mother.
To Riri’s surprise, none of that came.
While she coughed and began to open her eyes, large, rough hands cupped her face. She took in his built body, water droplets falling from his smooth brown skin onto hers. Her eyes trailed over his pointed ears, to his intense dark brown eyes blinking the water from his long lashes, and grand jewelry. To her horror, she finds the very cause of her repeated nightmares.
His brow knit in confusion, and he frowned back at her.
“The scientist?”
Dream Namor must have been thinking that this was some sort of sick ass joke her subconscious was playing at, just like she was.
“Bey u Chaac in tu ts'o'ok-e'asa'abij? Yaan wáaj teech máax k reúna ti' tuláakal túun?” (So Chaac has shown me you? Will you be the one who brings us all together then?)
Riri sat up quickly and moved to swat him away from her, but he stopped her and held her hands in a tight grip. Before Riri could snap and tell him that he better never touch her again, a familiar breathy voice spoke behind her.
“Haven’t you done enough?”
Riri turned to see Shuri with her arms crossed, glowering at Namor. She wore a long white gown that hugged her frame, its skirt fanning out and floating in the water around her, making her look ethereal. Shuri walked towards them and placed a protective hand on Riri’s shoulder.
“Leave her alone, Namor.”
Namor tilted his head to the side, causing his vibranium collar to gleam in the light. The reflection of it gave his skin a golden glow, and Riri couldn’t help but feel that she felt trapped between two gods.
“Why would I, princess? Now, when this is all coming together?” Namor cut his eyes, and his tone lowered dangerously. “You kept this from me.”
“Leave her alone”, Shuri repeated through gritted teeth.
Riri tried to tug her hand from Namor’s grasp again, but he wouldn’t budge to her dismay.
“Hey–”
“She’s the center of it all for our raging hearts to be at peace", Namor spoke, nearly pleading for Shuri to understand. “You may continue to deny me for now and our own connection, but this clearly isn’t over, princess. Not until all three of us have met. She’s mine as well.”
“You can’t have her”, Shuri replied firmly. “I won’t allow it.”
Riri started to look up at Shuri whose grip tightened on her shoulder, but Namor captured her chin and turned her face towards him.
“You were the cause of bringing us all together, and I ignored what was right in front of my eyes”, Namor said with a short, bitter laugh. “For that, I am sorry.”
Riri panicked as he cradled her face again.
“I’ve waited hundreds of years for you both. Once I find you, and I will, I am not going to let you go so easily again.”
Riri felt the taste of the salt of the ocean crash on her lips, and once again Namor was the cause of taking the very air from her lungs. She opened her mouth to scream–
Riri woke up with a sharp intake of breath, her oversized t-shirt clinging to her skin with sweat. She slowly took in the familiar layout of her single dorm room, and reminded herself to breathe slowly. She groaned as she sat up and glanced at her clock that read 10:00 a.m., grateful that it was the weekend. One more week to go until Spring Break, and then maybe she would finally be able to relax.
Vacation couldn’t come fast enough. She had absolutely no plans, even though her 20th birthday would fall during the break, but she didn’t mind. She couldn’t wait to get home to her mom and her sister, Sharon. A simple birthday dinner with them at the Cheesecake Factory or something was fine with her as long as she got to be with her family, and away from school.
Since her life had been turned upside down in September, Riri felt that she was constantly on guard, which had become completely exhausting. She had immediately withdrawn from her Metallurgy class when she came back not being able to stand the sight of her professor. When she would go to her classes each day, she couldn’t keep the thought out of her head that every single new and inventive idea that she would work on for her assignments to get ahead and prove herself would be snatched away by the government. Herself along with them.
There were also the frequent nightmares of the horror she had experienced when Namor attacked. Sometimes it was an exact account, other times she wouldn’t make it and would endlessly fall into the open, broken floor of the throne room. She got it: she had a lot to work through, and this was the hard part. But the dream she just had with that dramatic exchange of Shuri and Namor raging at each other with her in the middle of it?
Riri touched her lips and shuddered. She must have bumped her damn head before going to sleep, because what the hell was the explanation for that?
Her dream ending in Namor’s claim and kiss was eerie to say the least. She hadn’t even met the man personally before their battle over the Atlantic, where she was tasked with trapping him. When she was abducted and Shuri was allowed to spend time in the depths of Talokan, Riri was confined to the caves under constant watch for days. The only time she was spoken to was with Shuri when she returned, or when the Talokanil handmaidens offered her fruits and vegetables that her stomach was way too nervous to eat. Namor hadn’t even bothered meeting her. He had decided that he wanted her dead for the crime of creating an invention that was stolen from her, and that she was his prisoner. She wasn’t worth the effort of anything else, and that was that.
Her mind drifted to Shuri. Though they hadn’t spoken in nearly two months, they were in contact in the beginning just like Shuri promised. Shuri had told her that she needed time away from Wakanda to heal and come with terms with her losing her entire family. In her healing in Haiti, Shuri found that her family was not all lost, and that she was an aunt. Toussaint was her nephew’s name, and he had become Shuri’s entire heart and focus.
Before things got quiet, she and Riri would text and video chat. Shuri would also share pictures of life by the beach, and pictures of her adorable, sweet boy with missing teeth and the deepest dimples Riri had ever seen. Riri was flattered that Shuri shared a secret part of herself and life that many did not know about, but Riri couldn’t help but feel resentful that her mark wasn't Shuri's. As time progressed, the updates from Shuri died down and then completely stopped. Riri understood that she probably needed her space and time to enjoy her new family member, and was thankful that Shuri had the joy that she deserved to hold onto.
Now, how did Riri’s mind come up with that image of the man who tormented and took from Shuri, laying claim to them both? She felt like she was losing herself a bit. She really needed this break. Riri snatched off the scarf that was on her head and swung her legs over her bed.
One more week. You’ve got this.
Getting up and grabbing her phone, Riri made her way to her small bathroom to grab what she needed for the dorm showers. Riri had begun to wear her natural hair out again and multitasked between looking through her small cubby to find a soft hair tie while glancing at notifications on her phone. Riri sucked her teeth when she got to Snapchat and saw a chat from one of her clients, Dinah Thompson. She owed Riri $800 for a project Riri had finished two weeks ago for Dinah’s upcoming final exam.
Dinah: hey can we meet up today? have something for you but not all of it and wanted to work out something? :)
Riri sighed in frustration as she grabbed her hair tie and shower cap. Smiley face or not, she was not playing with her.
Me: Not all of it like how much are we talking? You know things are about to get crazy af with exams before break! I need my money! And you know what would be sad? Having it come out that the project you submitted wasn’t even your work, and that gossip running crazy at your parents megachurch!
Riri slammed her phone on the counter, and glared at the three dots on the screen indicating Dinah replying. She pulled her hair back and put the shower cap on her head in a huff. Shuri had warned her to stop playing around with this. At the thought of Shuri, Riri once again thought about her strange dream.
God.
Dinah: you wouldn’t.
Me: Bet?
Dinah: no please don’t.
Me: Stop playing games then, girl! Damn!
Dinah: i have half! i’m really sorry girl but I have something to make up for it with! just the thing! meet me for lunch? my treat.
Riri’s Venmo notification popped up, and surely enough Dinah sent her the half.
Me: Now what the hell are you going to make it up with?
Dinah: it’s actually about break! i promise we can talk it through, and that this makes up so much more than what i owe you!
Riri paused, a compromise for something more than what she was owed? She’d see about that.
Me: Fine.
...
Free sushi was always amazing, but Riri was still pissed with Dinah as she stuffed a spicy shrimp tempura roll in her mouth, no matter how delicious it was. After meeting a nervous and jittery Dinah, they bundled up to brave the cold weather and rushed to their stop to hop on the subway, better known in the city as “the T”, to a ramen and sushi joint that was a 15-minute ride away from school. Riri looked up at Dinah, who was nursing her bowl of ramen, her pink knit hat with an impressively large fur pom-pom on the top still on her head.
Dinah Thompson was from Atlanta and came from black megachurch royalty. She was a pretty girl with golden-brown skin and dyed light brown hair, which was always on point. She was obviously smart as well and majoring in Computer Science, but very insecure in her work which pissed Riri off a little that she couldn’t believe in herself enough. If Dinah wasn’t her client, and Riri hadn’t threatened her with blackmail for breakfast, Riri supposed that she wouldn’t be opposed to being an uplifting friend.
“So, what's this amazing offer?” Riri asked, poking at a wasabi ball with a chopstick.
Dinah put down her bowl of ramen and drummed her long acrylic nails in thought before she came out with it.
“Tulum.”
“Tulum?”
“I have an open spot for vacation in Tulum for one week during break.”
Riri stared back at her, stunned.
“I feel guilty, and it’s really all I have to offer. It’s embarrassing, but I blew all my money on this vacation and tickets for Coachella next month, and my parents aren’t sending money until right before the trip.”
“So, you’re broke and can’t pay me back, because you decided to get Coachella tickets because…priorities?”
Dinah groaned. “Look, a group of my friends decided we wanted to go to Tulum for Spring Break, and I was the one who offered to book it, which they would pay me back on.”
Dinah scrolled through her phone for a moment and brought up pictures. “The resort is beautiful, and right on the beach. My friend MacKayla bailed last minute without paying back, but the room is already booked. We’re going three days after break starts, and meeting at Cancun. Now, so that you have nothing to worry about and our deal can stay between us, all you’d really have to worry about is food that’s not at the resort. Everything else is covered. I’ll get your flight once I get my allowance.”
Riri took in the images that Dinah flicked through, and couldn’t deny that it looked beautiful and peaceful.
“I know we don’t know each other that well, and this started off like shit, but I’m hoping we can move past that?”
Riri flicked her eyes from Dinah’s hopeful smile to her phone as Dinah continued to flick through pictures of the resort, images of the beach, turquoise waters, and...Maya ruins.
Then it clicked fully.
“Tulum, Mexico?” Riri asked.
“Yeah?”
Shit.
“Do you not have a passport?” Dinah pressed.
“I’ve got one…” Riri drifted off, her heart beginning to race.
“We’ll be able to drink there!” Dinah continued excitedly, oblivious to Riri curling into herself. “The food and nightlife, there’s a lot to do! We were planning on zip lining, going to the cenotes, riding ATVs, having photoshoots for the Gram–”
“My birthday is during that week”, Riri blurted suddenly, trying to blink away the image of her waking up in a cold cave. “March 24th.”
“Oh, we’re definitely going clubbing that night then! Let me put that in my calendar right now!”
“Damn girl, slow down! I haven’t even said yes! Let me think!” Riri laughed, holding her head in her hands.
This did sound like exactly what she needed. She’d still be able to spend time with her family in Chicago before and after the trip. Would she be crazy if she turned down a vacation? Even if it was in the Yucatán Peninsula, where she was held hostage months ago, hundreds of feet below the surface while Namor plotted her execution?
Nah, you know what? Fuck him, Riri thought darkly.
She was tired of this hold on her. As if having her nightmares weren’t enough, it was the cause of her debating whether she could go on vacation? Dinah also did have a point: the cost of this offer would make up more than what she owed her. Besides, wasn’t this what these years were all about? Having fun? Going on adventures and travelling? Definitely not having nightmares about the winged-heel man that tried to kill you, and killed the mother of your almost-soulmate.
“Look”, Riri said finally, “If I say yes, no one can know that this is your payment for me doing your project. Definitely not your friends. I can’t have people thinking they can get off all the time. I can’t have you thinking that.”
“No one will know”, Dinah nodded. "All I asked my friends was if they were cool with you coming."
Riri sighed, her decision made. “You’re helping me look for bathing suits, though. I’m not about to look crazy in the background of your Instagram photoshoots.”
Dinah threw her head back and laughed. “I’ve got you!”
Dinah excitedly explained to Riri over the remainder of their lunch that she booked transportation for the group from Cancun to Tulum, and that it would take a little while to go get to the resort. Along with Dinah and Riri, Dinah’s friends Wendy Ng, Mia Barlowe, and Veronica Bernard would be going too. Dinah made sure to add Riri to their group chat to become familiar with the girls and have their contacts. Their attitude had been ‘the more the merrier’, which made Riri thankful for the non-awkward introduction, and she was put at ease that she wouldn’t be too out of place with them for the week.
“You’re not going to run around and act like those girls that used to be on TV, are you?” Riri's mother, Ronnie, joked over their video chat that night.
“What?! No, Ma!” Riri laughed.
Her mother was cooking dinner as her little sister held up the phone. Riri started to get food envy at the sight of her mother mixing the fried cabbage with sausage and rice she had on the stove. Ronnie had just pulled the chicken out of the oven. Riri couldn’t wait to get a plate of her mother’s cooking when she got home.
“Well, I’m glad you’ve made friends at school and that you’re celebrating your birthday like this, baby! Look at you coming out your shell! This'll be good for you!”
“I think so too”, Riri nodded, not correcting her about the ‘friends’ part. “I need this.”
“I still want to have a birthday dinner for you here”, Ronnie added as she turned the heat off on the stove.
“Okay!”
“Alright, baby! Let me go finish this! I love you!”
“Love you, too! Save me a plate!” Riri could hear Sharon giggle behind the phone.
“Love ya, Ri!” Sharon added.
“Bye!”
The camera cut, and Riri laid back on her bed and gazed at her ceiling. It was starting to feel real now. She let herself feel the anxious thrill of doing something new and out of her comfort zone flow through her. Riri absentmindedly stroked the outline of the unknown flower etched deep into her skin.
“I’ve waited hundreds of years for you both...”
She was going to take something awful that happened to her, reclaim it, and turn it into something positive.
“Once I find you…”
She was going to have fun for the first time in months. She swore on her life she would. Fuck being afraid. Fuck Namor and his fancy feet. Fuck those caves. Fuck the papaya she could barely swallow. Fuck the Talokanil bombs…
“I am not going to let you go so easily again.”
“You’ll never have me”, Riri whispered.
Riri’s phone started to ring, and she almost flung it out of her hands when she saw that it was a video call from Shuri. She answered quickly, feeling like her heart was in her throat as she took Shuri in. Her hair was still cropped with soft curls on top of her head, and she wore a loose airy tank. Riri could tell that Shuri was sitting on the beach, because she could hear waves crashing in the distance. Shuri held her phone in one hand and fiddled with something in her lap that was out of view of the camera. Riri noticed that Shuri’s eyes looked a little puffy like she had been crying, and her heart sank.
“Hey”, Shuri said with a shaky voice. “Are you–are you doing okay?”
“I’m fine”, Riri said softly. She was about to ask Shuri what was wrong, but her words died as Shuri continued.
“I’m sorry I’ve gone off the grid–”
“You don’t have to apologize.”
“No, I do. I’ve just been dealing with a lot, you know? I’m needed back in Wakanda, and I’m returning tomorrow. But everything is just coming back...”
Riri swallowed hard and nodded in understanding.
“And you’ve been on my mind”, Shuri admitted. “I wanted to make sure that you were doing alright after everything? That you feel safe?”
Shuri paused, waiting for Riri to answer at the opening she gave her to be vulnerable with her, and looked like she was holding her breath. In her silence, Riri watched Shuri nervously fiddle with the object in her lap. In truth, Riri wanted to tell Shuri that most times, no, she didn’t feel safe. She wanted to tell her about the awful nightmares, and that she felt like she was constantly being watched by the government. That she just wanted to feel alive again and get away from everything to find peace of mind, because she was up to her limit. That she wanted to prove to herself that what she went through didn’t have a hold on her.
But in the end she didn’t.
A small part of her felt scared to talk about what happened with Shuri, because Riri felt that she didn’t have the right to. She was here, and Shuri did not have her mother. She was miserably guilty about all of it, Riri realized.
“I’m actually doing surprisingly great, Shuri!” Riri lied through her teeth, shutting down the opportunity to open up, which Shuri had clearly wanted. “Better than I thought, to be honest!”
“I’m glad”, Shuri said simply, her expression neutral.
“Matter of fact, I’m about to have the Spring Break experience in a week! I’ll be there for my birthday!”
Shuri’s eyes widened in surprise. She removed the object in her lap to place in the sand next to her, and Riri could make out that it was a conch shell.
“Really? Look at you!” Shuri actually smiled with teeth at that, and Riri beamed.
“Yeah!” she laughed. “A group of girls at school and I are going for a week!”
“Where to? Miami?”
Riri hesitated for a moment, deciding this truth may be hit or miss, but it didn’t make sense to lie about the location.
“Tulum!”
“Wow.”
“Yep.”
There was a long pause, and Riri became anxious.
“Are you staying near the beach?” Shuri asked her suddenly.
“Ugh, a walk right to the beach, y-yeah!” Riri replied. Shuri said nothing.
“It’s a nice resort”, Riri continued to ramble. “Their buffet breakfast is supposed to be really amazing! I can’t wait to take a nap on the sand, eat some cocktail shrimp, and just relax for a bit!”
Shuri remained silent, and Riri started to worry that she was beginning to have the same thoughts she did when Dinah told her about Tulum.
Of course she is.
“Do me a favor?” Shuri asked.
“Yeah?”
“I snuck a kimoyo bead on the bottom of the passenger’s seat of your car”, Shuri admitted, making Riri’s eyes bulge. “Can you bring that with you?”
“Wait what?! How have I not noticed that–?”
“Riri”, Shuri cut her off, her voice urgent, “Please? You deserve to have fun without any worry. This will just make me feel slightly better.”
She didn’t have to elaborate, Riri understood completely. “Of course.”
Shuri gave her a hushed thank you, and Riri shook her head, desperate to change the subject.
“How’s little man?”
Unbeknownst to Shuri, a figure stayed to watch her after they had an argument. Listening from the water and pleased with the information he collected, Namor disappeared into the black depths and began to plan.