Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Some days, the races got boring. Not in the sense that nothing was happening, but just in the sense that Rain would much rather drag his boyfriend back to bed.

“How much longer, P’Phayu?” Rain asked. (He did not whine. He was very careful not to whine.)

“Another hour,” said Phayu, smiling down at him. “Can my good boy wait that long?” He wrapped one hand around the back of Rain’s neck and Rain closed his eyes and melted happily into the fuzzy headspace waiting for him. A light touch skated up his cheek, followed by a warm breath—Phayu’s nose, teasing him with the promise of real kisses later.

“Yes, P’Phayu. Rain can wait,” he breathed. Phayu pecked a kiss onto his forehead and let go, turning back to the bike.

“Pai should be up soon,” he suggested. “Why don’t you watch him?”

Rain pouted. “But then I can’t watch my Phi being a big sexy mechanic.”

“Brat,” said Phayu, but he was smiling as he checked the bike over.

Rain walked outside the mechanics’ tent and scanned the area for Saifah or Prapai and Sky.

“Hey,” said a guy from his right. “What’s your name?”

Rain stiffened and didn’t answer. He’d been hit on a few times since starting to date Phayu, and it generally wasn’t pleasant for anyone involved. But anyone at the races should already know who he was at this point, unless they were brand new. And indeed, he didn’t recognize the guy, slight, with his hair in a ponytail, who held up his hands and laughed.

“It’s okay. I heard you and your boyfriend in there.” He jerked his head at the mechanics’ tent. “I can see you’re taken. I’m not trying anything.”

Oh. Okay, then. Rain relaxed. “I’m Rain,” he said. Then, just to be sure, “P’Phayu’s boy. What’s yours?”

“Korn. I’m new in town.”

“I guessed,” said Rain before he could figure out if that was rude. The guy, thankfully, only laughed again.

“That obvious?”

“You would already know who I was otherwise,” Rain explained. “P’Phayu’s Khun Pakin’s favored mechanic.”

“Ah.” Korn nodded. “So, Rain. Like I said, I heard you and Phayu talking, and I thought I’d ask you if you could tell me where the local scene is.”

The emphasis was odd. Scene for what?

“Racing?” he tried. “This is basically it for the underground stuff. If you want legal…”

“No, no.” Korn laughed. “The scene.” He shifted closer to Rain and lowered his voice, despite the fact no one was close. “Where good boys and the men who own them go to play.”

Rain’s suspicions were back up again. What was Korn getting at? He did not like that phrasing.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, P’Korn,” he said firmly. “I think I should go find my friends.”

“I’m safe, I promise!” said Korn, frowning at him now and taking a step back. “Is it all invite-only, or what? I can take no for an answer. My boyfriend, my girlfriends, and I just moved here, and we’d like to get involved, that’s all. If you have a name you can point me to for vetting?”

“What’s going on here?”

Rain relaxed against Phayu’s chest as arms came up to encircle him. Phayu would know what to do.

“This is P’Korn,” he started, because P’Phayu would appreciate it if he was polite. Korn gave a wai. “He’s asking me where the scene is and he doesn’t believe me when I tell him I don’t know what he’s talking about.”

One of Phayu’s hands came up to rest possessively over Rain’s throat, making him startle slightly. “This scene?”

“Yes!” said Korn, visibly relieved. “Should I have gone to you? I apologize if I stepped on your dynamic, but you looked busy.”

“No, Rain’s allowed to talk to whoever he wants. But he literally does not know what you’re talking about,” said Phayu. “Got a pen?”

Korn’s face was all confusion, but he produced pen and paper from his jacket pockets, and Phayu wrote a few lines and handed it back. Korn took it, glanced over it, and gave another wai.

“Exactly what I was looking for. Much appreciated, Khun Phayu.”

Korn left, and Rain spun around in Phayu’s arms.

“What was that all about?” he demanded. Phayu was possessive, but he didn’t usually put on displays that were so…sexual, not for other people. For all Phayu liked to fuck him in the living room and risk getting found by Saifah, actually being watched was somewhat different.

“He was asking about the kink scene,” said Phayu, leaning down to speak directly into his ear. “BDSM.”

That did nothing to lessen Rain’s confusion.

“Why ask me?”

Phayu sighed. “Can we save this conversation for when we’re home, good boy?”

Rain bit down on his curiosity and nodded. One more hour. Less, now. Phayu gave him a squeeze and a kiss on top of the head, and he went to go find Prapai.

It was late by the time they got home, but Rain had not managed to think about anything else for the remainder of the hour, so as soon as they were settled in bed, he asked, “Why did he ask me about BDSM?” again.

“Because what we do is very obviously BDSM to anyone who knows what they’re looking for,” said Phayu, folding his hands behind his head and looking utterly unconcerned about this earth-shattering sentence. “Did he overhear us talking in the tent?”

“Yes,” said Rain, and Phayu nodded as though that explained everything.

It did not.

“What are you talking about?” burst out Rain. “I would have noticed if we were doing that!”

Phayu only quirked a brow and the corner of his lips at him.

“Like, sure, you spank me occasionally!” said Rain. “But it’s not for fun. It’s not because I like pain! It’s punishment. There are no whips or chains involved. And there certainly wasn’t any of that going on tonight!” He wasn’t entirely sure he was being coherent.

“Do you know what BDSM stands for?” asks Phayu.

“Of course!” said Rain, and then, “Uh,” as he realized he didn’t.

“Liar,” said Phayu affectionately. “It’s an overlapping acronym.” In English, he continued, “Bondage and discipline. Dominance and submission. Sadism and masochism.”

Rain gaped for a moment.

“We don’t do sadomasochism, that’s true,” went on Phayu, switching back to Thai. “But we do all the rest of it.”

Rain squeaked.

“Bondage—holding your wrists down counts, though usually people mean rope or handcuffs. Discipline—rules and punishment. Submission’s what you’re doing every time you go under for me. To a lesser extent, every time you call yourself mine. And dominance is of course what I’m doing.”

“Every time I go under,” repeated Rain.

“Like last night. That’s called subspace.”

Last night. The fuzzy, happy headspace?

They did that all the time.

Rain buried his face in his hands, struggling to recontextualize their entire relationship.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he moaned.

“Does it change anything, knowing there are words for it?” asked Phayu. “I like what I like. I don’t need to wrap it up in boxes.”

Rain couldn’t find an argument for this, though he was sure there was one.

“So, what P’Korn wanted…” he started.

“There’s a community of people who practice kink. Events you can socialize at. I’m just not interested. What I like is my business. Korn heard me call you my good boy and you call yourself by name, and he saw me do this, and thought you must know where to find those people.” He wrapped a hand around the back of Rain’s neck and tugged him in for a kiss.

That distracted Rain rather thoroughly for the rest of the night.

But only the night.

“Did you know that what P’Phayu and I do counts as BDSM?” Rain demanded of Sky the next day.

“Fucking—” said Sky, tossing his pen down and flushing. “Keep your voice down, will you? Not everybody’s understanding about that kind of thing. And yeah, I did, I guess? I mostly try not to think about it. Did you not?”

“No!” said Rain, lowering his voice slightly. They were in the middle of the drafting room. “I thought it was all about people who like hitting during sex, and stuff like that. I don’t like getting hit.” Sky looked at him sharply.

“P’Phayu hits you? And you don’t want him to?”

“Now you’re making it sound like something bad!” said Rain. “It’s punishment, like when you make me kneel or whatever! It’s not anything like what happened to you,” he trailed off into a whisper. Sky pretended not to hear him, which was the point.

“How’d this come up?” he asked instead, so Rain described the conversation with Korn and the subsequent one with Phayu. By the end of it, Sky had forgotten to be embarrassed and looked thoughtful instead.

“I don’t know why I never thought about it, but of course there’s a community,” he mused. “Wonder if we could get those names from P’Phayu?”

“What?”

“Whatever he gave P’Korn.”

“What?”

Sky finally looked at him again. “Don’t you wanna know if you’re missing anything? Maybe there’s something you want to try and you never knew it existed. And don’t tell me you wouldn’t love more people to gush to about how well P’Phayu doms you.”

Well. When he put it like that.

Phayu did not want to hand over the list.

“Who knows what kind of people you’d run into?” he said. “It’s dangerous.”

Rain reported back to Sky, who came with him to launch a second attack.

“It can’t be more dangerous than the races,” he pointed out. “And it’s not like he’d be alone.”

“I wouldn’t?”

“If you don’t want to go with him, I will,” said Sky, still to Phayu. “I have some questions myself.”

That, at last, made Phayu hand over one name: a racer called Manow who ran a regular meetup for under-35s at a local restaurant.

“Of course you’re welcome!” she said, pinching their cheeks. “Munches are very low-key ways to get to know people without the pressure of a play party. We get together for a meal and just chat.”

“About BDSM?” asked Rain.

“Sometimes! And sometimes about work and hobbies and anything else. It’s as safe as you can get, since it’s out in public. You don’t have to give anyone your real names or anything.”

“Thank you, Phi,” said Sky, giving her a wai. “We’ll be there.”

Still, Rain is surprised at how much it really is just having a meal with friends. Manow called for a round of introductions, and everyone was perfectly friendly, not creepy at all. Conversation flowed easily, just as she’d said—from work and the latest big movie to what kink events people were attending and things they wanted to try and back again.

“So, we’re pretty new to this whole thing,” said Sky as the meal started to wind down. “Is it okay to ask questions?”

“Of course, Nong!” said Manow. “What are you wondering about?”

“How do you know the line between spanking your partner for punishment as part of kink, and abuse? Specifically because the person doesn’t want it in either case.”

Rain’s mouth dropped open. He’s been ambushed. Brought here under false pretenses.

“Consent!” answered Manow. “A sub doing discipline play often does like it, and even if they don’t like the actual act, they like the way it feels in here to be punished by their partner and, usually, rewarded after.” She tapped her temple with one finger. “But the key difference is that if the sub really, truly wants it to stop, they can ask for that, either with plain language or a safeword, and know their dom will stop.”

Sky didn’t actually look at Rain, but he could feel it anyway.

“It’s a bit of a sticky spot with a lot of the community, actually,” Manow went on. “How quick people are to jump to accusing us of abuse. Plenty of us are abuse survivors, and we know the difference.”

Sky startled back.

“Really?” said Rain, interested. “How does that happen?”

“For some people, it makes them feel safer to have control of a scene, after spending so much time not being in control. For some, they’ve had pain or humiliation mixed up with pleasure for so long that vanilla sex just doesn’t hit the mark anymore for whatever reason. BDSM allows people to experience that relatively safely. Again, consent makes the difference. It’s not that there aren’t assholes in the community, but that’s just what happens when you take a subset of the general population, you’re going to get a few assholes, and you have to learn to spot them and kick them out. It’s not inherent to any type of kink. And the overall culture is very big on communication and consent.”

Sky was very stiff beside him.

“That makes sense,” said Rain, giving a wai. “Thank you, P’Manow.”

“Any time!”

They didn’t speak again while the meal finished up, except to bid their goodbyes on the way to the car.

“Are you okay?” Rain asked.

“Fine,” said Sky, but Rain didn’t like the set of his jaw or the faraway look in his eyes. Sky had driven, but he didn’t protest when Rain stole the keys and moved to the driver’s side, just got in the passenger seat.

“Do you want me to take you to P’Pai’s?” he tried.

“If you want.”

Rain frowned at him, hard, and pulled out his phone to text Prapai.

Where are you, Phi?

At the apartment. Why? Was I supposed to be somewhere?

No, just checking. I’m bringing you Sky.

Is he okay? Did something happen?

He’s mostly okay, but I think he should get boyfriend cuddles. Putting down my phone to drive now. You can ask him.

He was tempted to explain the entire thing, but he was aware that the longer he sat here texting, the longer it would be until he got there. So he put his phone back in his pocket and pulled out of the parking space.

Sky’s phone buzzed, and he pulled it out. He read the screen, then made a face and unlocked it.

“You didn’t have to go and worry P’Pai,” he grumbled.

“He’s gonna worry anyway, and I didn’t wanna drive all over the city looking for him,” said Rain, very reasonably, he thought.

Sky tapped something back, then put his phone back in his own pocket and ignored it, even though it buzzed several more times.

They drove in silence. Prapai was waiting in front of the building when they pulled up, and he immediately reached for Sky’s hand, scanning him head to toe with a worried look on his face.

“I’m fine,” said Sky, finally smiling a little. “Can we just go inside?”

Prapai beamed back. “Of course. It’s always a good night to have my Sky over.”

Rain handed the keys back over and bid them both goodbye before calling a ride for himself.

“P’Phayu…” Rain started. He couldn’t think of a way to ask his question that wasn’t going to hurt Phayu’s feelings, but it had been on his mind since the munch three days ago and he figured he needed to.

“Yes?” They were curled together in bed, and Phayu was petting his hair.

“Don’t be mad at your wife,” said Rain. “But. If you were punishing me and I said stop, for real, you’d stop, right? I said don’t be mad!” he added hastily as Phayu pulled away, eyebrows drawing down.

“Of course. Have I given you a reason to believe I wouldn’t?”

“Not recently!” Rain tried to assure him. “I just keep remembering that first time you brought me back to your room, after my car didn’t really break down.”

Phayu relaxed a little and huffed a laugh. “Sweet boy. You never did figure that night out, did you?”

Rain glared at him without heat. Phayu stretched out on the bed and shot him a smirk.

“Rain. Every single thing you did from the time we met, through the code-line gathering, up until you hit me with a pillow, was textbook how queer men act when they’re trying to pick up. The staring. The touching. The agreeing to come with me. All of it.”

Rain blinked. “But…I said no?”

“It’s not always safe to be direct,” explained Phayu. “You can’t just walk up to a man in a bar and ask if he wants sex, you stand too good a chance of getting punched or worse. So you learn to read body language. You escalate a step at a time. You ask him up to your room. You ask to dry his hair for him.” His smirk deepened. Rain blushed. “And every time I did, you said yes, with your words and your body both. And so when you said no, I thought you must be playing the same game we play when you whine about your rules, where you’re saying no but you don’t mean it, because your body language still said you wanted to keep going. It just turned out you were working off a different dictionary entirely.”

Rain had never thought about it in those exact terms, but he does always make sure to whine and exaggerate his complaints about his rules or punishments, so Phayu will know it’s not real.

“I know what you sound like, now, when you’re doing that,” Phayu continued, as if reading his mind. “I wouldn’t make that mistake again.”

Rain nodded, satisfied, and curled back into his lover’s chest.

“What brought this on?” Phayu asked, wrapping an arm around him.

“At the munch, Sky asked P’Manow how to know the difference between getting spanked in a kink way and just plain getting hit,” Rain explained. “And she said it was knowing that you could say stop. And Sky didn’t actually say anything, because he got distracted, but I know he wanted to ask if I was sure I could. And I wanted to say yes! But I just kept thinking of that time, and Sky always knows when I’m kind of lying. So I wanted to…” He waved a hand in the air.

“You wanted to be certain enough that he’d believe you when you said it,” finished Phayu, relaxing the rest of the way. “When he got around to actually asking.”

“Exactly!” Rain beamed up at him. “It’s not that I was actually afraid, I promise, Phi. I just didn’t know how to reconcile it.”

“If it makes you feel better, we could come up with a safeword,” Phayu suggested. “Or just say that you can complain with any word except ‘stop,’ which will actually mean to stop.”

“No, I trust you,” said Rain through a yawn. “Maybe if we get into anything super intense.”

“Oh? Are you planning on that?”

“I dunno, Phi,” Rain mumbled, burying his face in Phayu’s shoulder. It was time to sleep, why was Phayu still asking questions? “Did you know people roleplay as animals sometimes?”

The last thing he heard before he drifted off was a sort of choking noise.

“Are you going to go back to the munches?” Sky asked him later, while they were studying in Rain’s dorm room.

“I wasn’t planning on it,” said Rain, staring down a troublesome line on his diagram. “Why? Are you?”

Silence.

Rain looked up. Sky was looking determinedly at his pencil.

“Do you want me to go with you?” he tried.

“It’s fine,” said Sky. Rain frowned at him.

“I don’t mind! Or I’m sure P’Pai would go with you.”

When he got no answer, he prodded Sky in the ribs with his eraser, and when he got a flinch, doubled down into an outright tickle fight. They toppled off their chairs and wrestled until Sky, wheezing with laughter, managed to get his hands pinned over his head. They stayed that way for a moment, catching their breaths and giggling, until Sky seemed to notice the position he was in and jumped back, releasing Rain’s wrists and scooting to sit against the bed.

Bondage, thought Rain.

“I thought you took me to make sure I wasn’t getting spanked in a bad way,” he said, crawling over to sit next to Sky against the bed.

“Yeah, well, then you and P’Manow said some things, and sometimes I want the opinion of someone who isn’t going to tell me I’m perfect and could never hurt anyone, which is what P’Pai does.”

“Me? What did I say?”

“About me making you kneel.”

Oh.

Rain was abruptly aware that he was out of his depth.

Well, that was fine. Sky wasn’t asking him for answers.

“If you want to go back, I’ll go with you,” he said again, and grinned. “You were right when you said I could use more friends to talk to about P’Phayu and how good he—”

“All right!” Sky cut him off, but he was grinning, and Rain preened.

“You want to go back?” Phayu was frowning again.

“Just because you don’t need anybody’s input on what you like and what it means doesn’t mean nobody does,” said Rain, pouting at him. When Phayu only looked more concerned, he added, “I think it will be good for Sky. And he doesn’t want to take P’Pai.”

Phayu’s expression cleared. “You’re doing this for N’Sky?”

“Not only. I also want to make some friends I can brag to about my Phi and how well he takes care of me.” Rain made his most fetching face and batted his eyelashes.

Phayu sighed, but he couldn’t keep a grin off his face. “Just promise me you won’t let any other Doms talk you into a room alone. They aren’t all as nice as me.”

“Promise!” sang Rain. Maybe eventually he can talk Phayu into coming with him. He’s dying to see what that looks like.

Chapter Text

“So,” said Pai, swinging their joined hands. “You wanna tell me what’s going on in your head?”

“I have no idea how to explain what’s going on in my head,” said Sky truthfully. Pai visibly pondered that for a moment as he let them into his apartment.

“What if you just tell me what happened tonight?”

He could do that, probably. He followed Pai to the couch and sat down, curling into his boyfriend’s side.

“Rain and I went to the munch, right,” he started, then stopped.

“Were they nice?” Pai prompted, and Sky nodded.

“Very. Friendly and welcoming all around.”

“Then what?”

“I asked P’Manow about the difference between punishment and abuse. And she explained that the line is consent, knowing that your partner will back off if you ask. And then.” He took a deep breath. “She said that a lot of people get into kink after abuse.”

Pai hummed encouragingly and petted his shoulder.

“She said that some people feel safe being in control of things because they didn’t have control before.”

“Is that something you want to explore?” asked Pai. He didn’t sound like that would be a problem for him, but—

“That’s something I already do!” Sky blurted out. “I’m on top, and even when I’m not, I’m controlling what we do and when and how.” Sure, he tells Pai to take what he wants, and that one time in the conference room, to all appearances, Pai did exactly that, but in reality…they’ve never talked about it, but he knows it’s true. And also: “Rain made a comparison between the punishment he gets from P’Phayu and the ones he gets from me and now I can’t stop thinking about it.”

“You punish Rain?”

“Yeah, you know, a couple times, when he’s being particularly dumb, not doing his part of the work for a group project or whatever. I made him kneel for a while after he gave you my phone number.”

Pai shrugged a little, like ‘fair enough.’

“He can make his own bad decisions on his own time, but when they start impacting everybody else, yeah, I do something about it.” He paused. “I’ve barely had to since he met P’Phayu, oh god, because he’s getting dommed by him now instead of me.” The revelation made his breath catch.

Pai pulled him in tighter and dropped a kiss on top of his head. “For what it’s worth, I love the sex we have. I’m more than happy to let you take the lead.”

Sky snorted. “You’d let me make you clean the housssseeeohshit.”

“I did let you make me clean the house.”

“That’s the problem,” said Sky, now muffled in his hands. Pai snickered and kissed him again.

“Baby, what are you worried about? If we both like what we’re doing, does it matter if it’s technically a dom/sub thing?”

“I don’t like feeling like I’ve been doing that this entire time without knowing it,” Sky complained, transitioning to bury his face in Pai’s shoulder.

“So you’re upset because you feel less in control of things than you did before?”

“Fuck everything. Yes.” Sky burrowed harder into Pai’s side, and Pai squeezed him tighter in response.

“What if I hurt you?” he asked, a long time later, so quietly he was surprised when Pai answered.

“You won’t. Not like you’re thinking.”

“How can you know?”

“Because I honestly can’t imagine you trying something remotely dangerous without researching the shit out of it first,” said Pai, and Sky couldn’t help but laugh into his shoulder. “You’re not reckless, and you’re not cruel.”

Logically, Sky knew he was not going to wake up and decide to start burning Pai with cigarettes any more than Pai was going to wake up and turn into Gun. He just felt so untethered.

“Sky?” Pai traced a finger over his cheek and under his chin, the gentlest encouragement to look up. Sky let him. “Nothing has to change, okay? It doesn’t matter if other people have built a framework around what we do unless you want it to. Nothing we’re doing is hurting me, or anyone else. Whatever you need to do to feel secure again, I’m here for you, you know that, right?”

“You are such a sap,” groaned Sky, abruptly running out of emotional vulnerability for the evening and pushing himself to his feet. “It’s late, let’s go to sleep.”

Pai just grinned at him, the smug bastard.

Somewhere in the night, two pieces of the conversation collided in Sky’s head, and he woke up thinking, “What do I need to do to feel secure? Research the shit out of it.”  

The internet was a bit of a minefield, but he found some websites that looked legit, and talked Rain into going to another munch, not that he needed much convincing. Phayu even emailed him a few other links and email addresses with no explanation. Sky stared at that one for a minute, wondering what the hell Rain said to him, but decided he’d rather not know and just emailed back his thanks.

Manow’s munch wouldn’t be held again for another month, but it turned out other local people hosted them as well. Sky picked one off Phayu’s list that wasn’t too far away and forwarded it to Rain, who wrote back saying he was free that evening. (Sky expected nothing different. It was a Korean restaurant.)

“Hey!” an unfamiliar man said to Rain, as soon as they walked in the door. “Rain, right?”

“P’Korn!” said Rain. “This is my friend Sky. Sky, this is P’Korn.” Ah. The guy who started this whole thing by approaching Rain at the races.

“So you are in the scene,” said Korn, cocking his head. “What was up with that whole charade, then?”

“Oh, no, I legitimately had no idea,” said Rain brightly. “But I made him explain it to me later that night, and here we are!”

Korn looked skeptical, so Sky chimed in, “I can confirm that Rain has been managing to practice BDSM for around a year now without knowing it. Showed up the next day and announced it to the whole class.”

Korn put a hand over his face and started laughing as Rain pouted and shoved Sky’s shoulder.

“Who’s this?” asked another man, coming up behind Korn.

“Wai, this is N’Rain and N’Sky,” said Korn. “This is my boyfriend, Wai, and our girlfriends, Mon and Sam, are over there.” He pointed to a table on the other side of the room. “We just expanded our business into Bangkok, so here we are. You can tell your jealous boyfriend I have exactly as many partners as I can handle,” he added to Rain, smirking.

“P’Phayu’s not jealous,” complained Rain. Korn raised an eyebrow.

“No, really, he’s just possessive as fuck,” Sky explained.

“He just likes people to know who his wifey is!” said Rain, bright smile on his face once more. Sky rubbed at his temples.

“Ah, so it’s less of a ‘this is mine, don’t even talk to him,’ and more of a ‘this is mine, everyone else should be jealous’?” said Wai.

Rain nodded happily. Sky shrugged. “I try not to get sucked any deeper into their dynamic than I am. They’re completely gone on each other and it’s sickeningly cute. Hey,” he added to Rain as a thought occurred to him. “Maybe you can make enough kinky friends that you’ll stop showing up and asking me your sex questions out of nowhere!”

“If you really minded, you’d have brought P’Pai instead of me,” said Rain primly, and Sky was distressed to realize he was right.

“Have you met our hosts, or has Korn been monopolizing your attention?” asked Wai, and, at the negative, beckoned them to sit down.

The munch was run by a gay couple who introduced themselves as “pretty vanilla but good at organizing things, and my brat who benefits.”

“How does that work?” Sky asked curiously.

“I’ll tame him because he likes that, and that makes me happy, but it’s not something inherent to my personality or to the way I like to have sex, the way it is for him,” Win explained. “A little like being asexual for kink.”

“This one’s a brat,” said Sky, thumbing at Rain, who pouted at him again. That lip was getting a workout tonight. “In the literal kink category sense,” he added, which mollified Rain somewhat.

“You should go chat with Team,” suggested Win. “Just don’t give him any new ideas, please.” The quirk of his lips said he was joking, but Rain nodded seriously and got up to sit next to Team.

“Are you his tamer, or just friends?” Win added to Sky, who opened and closed his mouth a couple of times.

He settled on, “Not on purpose?” which made Win laugh. “He has a boyfriend to do that for him.”

“Doesn’t necessarily mean anything. Plenty of folks play with multiple partners. But I get you.”

“I have a boyfriend that I get…bossy with,” Sky found himself explaining. It was an understatement, but it was about as much as he was willing to explain to a stranger, laid-back as Win seemed. “I’m not sure what that means for us.”

“What does he think?”

“He’s so agreeable to anything that he’s cycled right back around to not helpful,” said Sky, and Win laughed again.

“Do you have a kink checklist?” When Sky shook his head, he went on, “That’s my recommendation. Essentially, it’s a long list of kinks and you list whether you’re interested, agreeable, or not interested, roughly speaking. Different lists have different degrees of detail. You’ll almost certainly find some things he’s not willing to do, and once you’ve gotten him to say no to some things, he’ll feel more able to express what he actually wants and you’ll feel more confident believing his yes.”

Sky gaped at him. It hadn’t even occurred to him to think of that as the issue, but it slotted into place like a puzzle piece.

“How did you…”

“I’ve been doing this for a minute,” said Win sympathetically. “The absolute most crucial thing a Dom needs from a sub is to be able to trust them to say no. If he doesn’t find some limits on a reasonably extensive list, then you guys probably aren’t in a place to try kink right now, so you’ll have an answer either way.”

“Sky…” said Pai, scanning down the list apprehensively.

“Don’t worry about what you think I’ll want,” Sky reminded him. “Just mark what you’re interested in, in general.”

Pai handed him back the list a few minutes later, still looking worried. Sky speed-read the list, and then he laughed in relief.

Pai shrank back, eyes going wounded, and Sky realized his mistake at once and reeled his boyfriend back in for a kiss.

“I’m glad,” he said into Pai’s ear, voice low. “Thank you.”

“You’re glad?” asked Pai suspiciously.

“You want what we have,” said Sky. “You want what we do for its own sake, not because it’s me asking.” The list included a couple of new things—apparently Pai was interested in being tied up?—but mainly it was just various types of light service submission.

“I’ve been telling you I like what we do,” complained Pai. “You didn’t believe me?”

The truth was no, not really, but Sky didn’t want to say that, so he just buried his face in his boyfriend’s neck. After a minute, Pai sighed, dropping his head on top of Sky’s and going boneless. “It’s hard sometimes. I get it.”

“You love me so much it scares me sometimes,” said Sky as quietly as he could, so he could pretend he hadn’t.

Pai was quiet for so long, Sky almost thought he was going to get away with it, but then he said, “You remember I told you I basically raised my siblings, right?”

“Mm.”

“It wasn’t because there was no one else to do it. When we were sick, mae was right there. I almost wish she had let me help; I still had to look up what to do for you. I just, ever since I can remember, I wanted to make sure they remembered their lunches and help them with their homework and be the person they came to when they got their hearts broken. I wish I could say I’ve always been like this in bed, but I can tell you that doing things for people I love is part of who I am.”

That did help. Sky pressed a kiss to the skin under his lips and enjoyed the shiver that followed.

You love me enough not to let me hurt us, he didn’t say.

“If you’re interested in rope bite, you’re welcome to come to that as well,” Manow told him the following month.

“Rope bite?”

“Skillshare for rope bondage, but people also just come and hang out. It’s very low-key.”

“I’d like that,” said Sky. “I’ve done a little research on it, but it’s…a lot.” He ignored Rain’s squeak of surprise.

“Oh, definitely,” said Manow, nodding vigorously. “I can recommend you some websites and free online courses to start with. There’s a lot that goes into tying well. And absolutely come to the bite even if you haven’t gotten through it all yet!”

When she left, Rain turned around and whispered, “You’re going to tie up P’Pai??”

“Maybe,” Sky said in a more normal voice. “You do discipline play with your friends, don’t act like I’m the weird one.”

Rain glared at him.

Sky went alone to rope bite, not quite wanting to ask either Rain or Pai, and it wasn’t until he got there that he realized Phayu would have words for him if he ever found out. Heart rabbiting in his chest, he opened the door.

“Hia!” yelled Team from where he was sprawled on a chair, snacking on something out of a bag. “Sky’s here!”

“Sky!” said Manow, waving from the center of the room, where someone was lacing her legs together with neon green rope. “You came!”

“Hey!” said Win, hurrying over and snatching up a clipboard. “Let me get you checked in. Have you done rope before?”

“No,” said Sky. He pulled out his ID for Win’s inspection. “I didn’t know this was your event.”

“There are four rope leaders, less pressure on any one person to be available,” explained Win. “I’ll introduce you.”

“I’m Pharm!” piped up an adorable auburn-haired young man appearing at his side. “If you want, I’ll show you how to do a single column!”

“I’d like that,” said Sky, the nerves draining out of him as quickly as they’d arrived. This was going to be fun.

He couldn’t wait to see Pai’s face when he came home with some new tricks.

Chapter Text

Phayu was working on the exhaust pipe for one of Pakin’s bikes when the door behind him opened and familiar footsteps pattered over to him. A smile crept across his face without permission: a frequent occurrence with Rain.

“P’Phayu!” Oh, his boy was riled up about something already. A thump marked Rain plopping to the ground next to him.

“Yes?” He didn’t look at Rain, focused on the bike. He was almost done with it, and then they could go home.

“Sky is cheating on me!”

Phayu stopped. Ran that through his head again.

It didn’t make any more sense the second time.

“With what, other friends?” he replied, turning to give Rain a quizzical look.

“Yes!” said Rain, whose pout was out in full force. He seemed to hear himself, and his expression turned sheepish.  

“You want to run that by me again,” said Phayu, giving up on the bike for now. He sat back on his heels and tried not to look too amused.

“He went to a rope bite without me and hung out with a ton of the folks from the munches! And he didn’t say anything about it,” Rain explained.

“What, alone?”

“P’Pai might’ve gone with him, I guess, I didn’t think to ask,” said Rain, gnawing on his own lip.

Well, that was fine. Prapai could handle himself.

“Nong, are you honestly jealous that Sky has friends outside your faculty?”

“Well, when you put it like that it sounds silly,” complained Rain.  Phayu stifled a laugh.

“You could let him practice on you,” he suggested. Then at least Rain might feel included. Rain’s eyes went wide.

“Wouldn’t that bother you?”

Phayu thought about it for a moment, then shook his head. “I told you before, I don’t get jealous without a reason. He’s your best friend. And I’ve never been very interested in rope, so if you want to try it, there’s your opportunity.”

Possibly Rain didn’t believe him, or Sky didn’t believe him, or maybe he was trying to cut down on the chances of being caught by Prapai before he was ready to show off his new skills, but either way Sky came over to their house one evening the following week with two coils of rope.

“That works out perfectly,” said Phayu, trying to put him at ease. “You can distract him while I make dinner.” He smiled at Sky, who smiled back tentatively.

“P’Pharm walked me through this chest harness last week,” Sky said. Rain made an interested noise, and Phayu tuned them out as he got out the cutting board.

He lost himself in chopping vegetables and organizing ingredients, humming softly to himself, only to tune back in abruptly when he heard a confused, “Rain?” and then, “P’Phayu, is this normal?”

Phayu grabbed a towel and dried off his hands as he rounded the island. They were sitting on the floor, Rain with his hands bound to his chest, tucked under his chin like he might to sleep. He was leaning against Sky, eyes shut, lips slightly parted. Sky held the tail end of the rope in one hand, like he hadn’t even finished putting it on.

“Mmmm,” said Rain by way of answer, even as Phayu squatted beside him and stroked the side of his face. Rain’s eyes opened, but only halfway, and he gave a sleepy smile, loose and carefree.

“He’s in subspace,” said Phayu, surprised. And deep under, too. “Just from rope?”

“I didn’t do anything else!” said Sky defensively.

Now Phayu actually was a tiny bit jealous. Rain only went under this far for him when Phayu really wore him out. Maybe he’d have to rethink his stance on rope.

“Are you going to leave him in it, or untie him? I can hold him if you need leverage,” he offered. Rain made an annoyed noise.

“Um. I guess I can leave him in it for a little bit,” said Sky, and Rain hummed happily.

“I’ll bring him up for you when you’re ready,” said Phayu. Sky nodded gratefully.

Phayu went back to fixing dinner, but now he kept an ear on the proceedings going on just out of sight. When he got to a good stopping place, he rounded the island again and sat down beside them.

“All right, Rain. Time to come out.”

Rain grumbled, but less so this time. Sky began to untie the rope. Phayu let him handle it until Rain’s weight was trapping the rope, and then reached out with one hand to ease him off Sky’s shoulder enough for Sky to work the rope out.

Sky released Rain’s hands, and they fell back to his lap like he’d forgotten he had motor control of them. Phayu eased him into a further sitting position, wrapping an arm properly around his shoulders. When Sky removed the last loop of rope, Phayu got a better grip on Rain and lifted him into his own lap—a more difficult task than usual, as Rain was still almost completely limp.

“How’s my sweet boy?” he asked as Sky began to tidy up the rope.

“Mmm,” said Rain again.

“Words,” Phayu reminded him.

“Good,” said Rain, drawing out the word. Phayu held him close with one arm and stroked Rain’s nearer arm and leg comfortingly with the other.

“You like rope, then, I guess?”

“Yeah,” sighed Rain, all air.

“It’s not very polite to go under for people who aren’t expecting it,” Phayu chided him gently. “Lucky I was here, hm?” When that garnered no answer, he tried, “You should thank N’Sky for tying you so well.”

“Thank you, Ai’Sky,” breathed Rain, managing to lift his hands to bob a wai.

Sky, rope all neatly bundled, only raised an eyebrow until Phayu gave him a pointed look, and then he said, “You’re welcome, Ai’Rain.”

Rain’s eyes were open now, and Phayu kept petting him until he felt Rain begin to shift against him, muscle tone returning, and with it his natural tendency to fidget.

“I need to finish dinner,” he told his boy. “You and Sky can wait out here until it’s done.”

Rain nodded, and Phayu picked him up entirely and plopped him on the sofa, making him giggle.

Phayu returned to the kitchen area and picked up where he’d left off, trying to hurry. The unexpected scene had thrown off his timeline for being done with dinner. He heard the boys talking for a little bit, but didn’t think anything of it when all went quiet.

He rounded the island again to set the first dish on the table, and his eyes fell on Sky, who was slouched in a chair playing a game on his phone, and then Rain, who had curled up into something of a ball on the couch. When Phayu looked closer, he appeared to be shivering slightly.

“Are you cold, Rain?” he asked, surprised.

The resulting “mm” was so tiny he barely heard it. Concerned, Phayu set the dish down and turned back to the couch, taking a closer look at Rain, whose eyes were shut. He sat down on the couch so Rain was facing him.

“Why didn’t you grab the blanket?” he asked, tugging it down from where it was folded in easy reach on the back of the couch and draping it over Rain, who only opened his eyes blearily for a second. When he shut them again, twin tears escaped from under his lashes and traced paths down his cheeks.

“What’s wrong, baby?” asked Phayu, now properly alarmed. Rain blinked at him again and shifted one arm. Slowly, as though the arm were made of lead, he brought it up to his face and swiped at the tears clumsily, before giving up and letting his hand fall back down. Phayu worked one arm around Rain’s back and another under his legs, and bodily lifted him back into his lap, blanket and all. Rain was once again limp, even more so this time, as though he were unconscious. “What’s wrong?” Phayu repeated.

Sky, who had put away his phone, knelt at Phayu’s feet, trying to catch Rain’s eyes and looking perturbed. “Rain? Are you okay?”

Rain nuzzled his face into Phayu’s neck and after a few seconds managed, “Being stupid.”

Worry climbed up Phayu’s throat, threatening to choke him, and then Sky said, “Is this subdrop?” and oh.

Phayu knew what subdrop was, of course, but had never had anyone experience it as far as he knew. He wracked his brain for anything he remembered about treating it, but came up blank. Sky, though, had his phone out again, and after a few seconds he stood up, walked to the fridge, and poured a glass of orange juice. He came back and sat next to them on the couch, holding it out to Rain.

“You’re not being stupid,” he said quietly. “Can you drink this for me?”

Phayu ended up taking the glass, because Rain’s hands wouldn’t support it. He fed the orange juice to Rain a swallow at a time, and Sky took over the job of stroking Rain’s available limbs and through his hair.

"You looked so good like that," he murmured, low, like Phayu wasn't meant to be able to hear him. "I loved seeing it. It looked like it felt amazing."

Rain seemed to gain strength back as he drank, finally taking the glass for himself.

“P’Phayu,” said Sky, “could we eat on the sofa?”

“I can sit at the table,” complained Rain, even as Phayu said, “Yes.”

Sky brought the food over and set it on the coffee table. Between the three of them, they fixed a plate for Rain, who thankfully started eating it of his own volition. Phayu managed his own plate one-handed, reluctant to stop holding onto Rain, who despite his protests was still plastered to Phayu’s chest.

By the end of the meal, Phayu’s bladder was making itself known.

“Rain, love,” he said quietly, trying to interject maximum sincerity into the word, “I need the restroom. Will you be okay for a minute?”

Rain stiffened.

“I’ll hold onto you the whole time,” Sky assured him, so gently, so unlike anything Phayu had ever heard him say. Rain nodded, and Phayu transferred him to Sky’s outstretched arms.

He took the opportunity to clear away the dishes, too, and when he returned, it was to the heart-melting sight of Rain curled up against Sky’s chest, hand fisted in his shirt, while Sky rubbed his back through the blanket. He sat down next to them and stroked Rain’s hair gently. After a minute, Rain tilted his head back to grin at him, looking much more like his usual self. A weight lifted off of Phayu’s chest, and he smiled back.

He took a few seconds to bask in it, and then forcibly pulled himself back and said, “So. What happened there?”

Rain and Sky both grimaced.

“Endorphin crash, basically, right?” said Sky. Phayu nodded.

“That’s part of why you stay close to your sub after a scene. To prevent subdrop. Usually a few minutes of cuddling does the trick for you, though.”

Rain squawked. “That’s why we do that?” He sounded offended, and Phayu worked not to laugh.

“No, we do it because we want to, it’s not a chore. I need the re-centering as much as you do. But it’s standard practice even when you aren’t dating your partner. So what, it just wasn’t long enough this time? Intense enough?”

“I think so,” said Rain, looking slightly guilty.

“Then I’m sorry for that,” said Phayu, kissing him on the head. “I’ll remember for later that if you’re down deep, you need more aftercare. Usually when you’re that deep, we fall asleep together, so it’s no wonder we never noticed the difference.” Then, as sternly as he dared, “It’s rude to go down like that for someone who’s not expecting it, Rain. N’Sky was here to practice rope, not to do a scene with you.”

Rain nodded shamefacedly. “I didn’t mean to. It just happened so fast.”

“You need to learn to work to control it,” Phayu told him. “It should be a choice, not an accident.”

“I’m sorry, Ai’Sky,” said Rain. Then, looking at Phayu again. “And I’m sorry for scaring you both.”

“More than that, you need to let somebody know what’s going on before it gets that bad. Now this hasn’t happened to you before, so it’s understandable. But in the future, this needs to be a two-way street. All right?”

Rain sighed and nodded.

“Until Rain can do that, N’Sky, I think you either need to find a different tying partner or be prepared to do a full scene.”

Rain pouted again, but didn’t protest. Phayu kissed him on top of the head again. His baby was still fragile; he couldn't forget that.

“All right. What do you want to do now? Bed? Television?”

Rain perked up. “Can we watch Running Man?”

Phayu sighed, but, well, he got himself into this by not limiting the options.

“All right. I’ll get my laptop.”

Chapter Text

Change of plans, I don’t know when I’m leaving, Sky texted. Prapai pouted at the phone. Then his memory caught up to him. Sky was at Phayu’s place, practicing rope on Rain because…Rain was jealous? Prapai hadn’t really gotten all the details. He was supposed to be there for a couple of hours, no more, probably get dinner there, and then he was coming over for dessert (and dessert) with Prapai.

Everything all right?

Rain’s in subdrop

Prapai had done a little reading about subdrop and dom or top drop. He frowned sympathetically, then in confusion. They were just supposed to be practicing, where did subdrop come into it?

How?

Beats me, but he is, and I have to make sure he’s all right

Of course.

And then the rest of his brain caught up.

Sky. Who was just sticking his toes into intentional domination, who was so worried about hurting Prapai. Was now dealing with a sub in subdrop. Without even having gone into it expecting a real scene.

Prapai was out the door before he consciously made the decision.

Phayu answered the bell, brows furrowing at the sight of him. He had his laptop in one arm. “Ai’Pai? What are you doing here?”

“P’Pai?” called Sky from further inside, and Phayu stood aside as Prapai made to enter.

Rain was wrapped in a blanket, half in Sky’s lap, and he looked okay, eyes alert, peering up at Prapai in mild curiosity the same as usual. Sky, though, Sky was holding him in a way Prapai had never seen him do before, like he was afraid to let go.

“…Are you here for Rain?” asked Sky, staring at him.

“No, I’m here for you,” said Prapai, squeezing himself between Sky and the arm of the sofa on the side with less Rain. He draped an arm over Sky’s shoulders. “Not that I’m not concerned for you as well, N’Rain.”

“For me?” There was something vulnerable in Sky’s eyes.

“Obviously for you, why else is he ever here?” said Phayu, setting the computer down on the coffee table and folding his arms.

“I’m so sorry that happened to you,” said Prapai, turning the full force of his gaze on Sky, trying to make him feel the sincerity. It seemed to work, because something twisted in Sky’s face in the second before he buried it in Prapai’s neck. Prapai squeezed the arm around his shoulders tighter.

“To him?” said Rain, face screwing up in bafflement. “What happened to Ai’Sky?”

“He tried something new, and you’re suffering for it, how do you think he feels?” said Prapai, trying and mostly failing to keep the snap out of his voice. That wasn’t even the half of it, but it was enough. “Again, I hope you’re all right, but you have two very concerned gentlemen here to take care of you. I just want to make sure someone’s taking care of my Sky.”

“Ohhh,” said Rain, twisting to wind his arms around Sky’s waist and bury his nose in Sky’s neck like the next car in some sort of faces-in-necks train. “Sky, Sky, it’s okay. I’m okay. This wasn’t your fault, all right?”

Sky didn’t make a sound, but Prapai could feel him shudder through a repressed sob, and if he could feel it, certainly Rain could.

“I should have noticed,” Sky whispered. “I was just sitting here playing my game and I didn’t notice you weren’t okay.”

“You trusted his aftercare to me, like I told you to,” said Phayu gently, sitting down on the Rain side of Sky. “Were you supposed to second-guess me on it? Magically know it wouldn’t be enough, when I didn’t? You’ve never had a sub down before, have you? You did your best with the information you had.”

“You were the one who figured out what was wrong,” said Rain, jabbing Sky in the chin with his nose. “You were the one who got me the orange juice. And like P’Phayu said, you came here to practice, and instead you had to deal with…” He fished a hand out from the blanket to wave around, seemingly to encompass the whole situation, but finished his sentence with “…me. Ow!” he added, looking over his shoulder to glare at Phayu.

“No, he’s right. That’s still the drop talking,” said Sky, raising his head to look at them. “Dealing with the situation. Not with you.”

“So let me know if I’ve got this right,” said Prapai. “My Sky came over to practice. N’Rain…reacted more strongly than expected.”

“Full on went under,” said Phayu. “Essentially an impromptu scene.”

“Rain went under. Phayu took care of him, but underestimated what he’d need. Rain dropped. Sky diagnosed the problem and took steps to solve it.”

“I helped,” said Phayu dryly. “But yes.”

“Okay. Sky?” He waited until Sky was facing him to say firmly, “You didn’t hurt him.”

Sky’s breath caught.

“You didn’t hurt me!” confirmed Rain at once. “Look. I’m fine.”

When that got no reaction, he let go of Sky’s waist to take his face in both hands and force eye contact. “Rain is fine,” he repeated.

“Would it help if he accepted your apology?” suggested Phayu. Sky nodded, glancing down to escape Rain’s gaze.

“But I don’t need an apology!” complained Rain, looking back over his shoulder at Phayu. “He didn’t do anything!”

“Maybe you don’t need to receive one,” said Phayu, a little sternly, “but maybe Sky needs to give one, hmm?”

Rain turned back to Sky and stared at him for a second. “I’ll accept your apology if you accept mine,” he decided. “Deal?”

That, at least, got Sky to crack the barest upturned-lip hint of a smile.

“Deal.”

“You all have eaten already, right?” said Prapai. At the affirmative, he added, “How about I make some dessert happen, and we all watch a movie?” Sky would get to see for himself that Rain was okay, Rain would get any leftover cuddles he needed, and Prapai would get to hold Sky.

“Korean game show do for you?” said Phayu. “That was the plan before you showed up.” It was slightly pointed, but Pai just grinned at him and refused to feel bad for barging in. Someone had to be on Sky’s side.

His certainty was further cemented as Sky snuggled back in, dragging Rain with him, and laid his head on Prapai’s shoulder, letting the tension out of his body with a long breath.

Prapai kissed him on top of the head. Yeah. Right call.

When Phayu finally kicked them out, Sky seemed fine to let go of Rain and leave with Prapai, and he seemed fine on the drive back to the apartment and as they got ready for bed.

He did not seem fine the following day.

It might have taken Prapai longer to notice if he wasn’t paying such close attention. Sky didn’t normally text him much during the school day, so the lack of messages wasn’t in and of itself worrying. And afterwards, when Sky came over, Prapai might have written the listlessness off, might’ve taken Sky’s word for it when he said he was “just tired, P’Pai, I’m fine.”

He wouldn’t say exactly that he didn’t believe Sky, but instead of suggesting he take a nap, Prapai curled around him and generally made himself a tactile nuisance. Sky snarked at him, but made no move to actually get rid of him, so Prapai settled in.

“How’s Rain, after yesterday?” he asked eventually.

“Seems fine,” said Sky. “Normal.”

“That’s good.”

“Mm.”

They sat for a minute in silence as Prapai tried to figure out whether it would be a bad idea to say, “and how are you after yesterday?”

He ended up saying nothing and just clung to Sky like a leech.

His phone rang around his lunch break the next day, and he answered it, heart climbing up into his throat when he saw it was Rain.

“Hello?”

“P’Pai, can you come get Ai’Sky?” said Rain, sounding worried. “He’s crying.”

“I’m fine,” said Sky in the background, and indeed, he didn’t sound like he was crying. Prapai grabbed his keys and headed for the door, holding up one finger to Namtan and pointing at the phone.

There was the noise of what Prapai imagined to be a tussle over the phone, and then Rain said, “Not like, bad crying, but it’s Sky.”

Sky, who locked his emotions down and would rather shut his friends out of his life than let them see him vulnerable. Prapai got it.

“I’m on my way,” he assured Rain, climbing into his car. “Did something happen, or…?”

“I don’t think so, he’s been kind of miserable all day. Yesterday, too,” said Rain.

There was more tussling, a yelp from Rain, and then Sky’s voice saying breathlessly, “I’m fine, P’Pai, don’t listen to Rain, I’ll see you tonight, bye!” The call went dead.

Prapai allowed himself a small snort.

He pulled up at the school fifteen minutes later, and quickly found Rain and Sky at their usual picnic table. Sky looked relatively normal, at least to an outside observer, but Prapai could see the tiredness in the lines of his face. Sky caught sight of him in return and went through a rapid face journey, ending in an exasperated glare at Rain.

“You didn’t have to come,” he grumbled, making room on the bench for Prapai to sit next to him and tug him in for a hug. “I told you I was fine.”

“In what world would I not have come?” asked Prapai rhetorically. Sky only sighed and leaned into the hug, resting his head on Prapai’s shoulder. Rain nodded, satisfied.

“I have class. Take care of him for me, okay, P’Pai?”

Prapai nodded solemnly. Rain grinned, grabbed his bag, and was off.

“I also have class,” Sky informed him. “Are you going to let me go to it?”

“No,” said Prapai. This seemed obvious to him. “Come back to the office with me. Or would you rather go straight to the apartment?”

Sky sighed again perfunctorily. “Office. I need to stay in P’Namtan’s good graces.” He stood up, and Prapai followed him, trying not to let his ever-present delight at Sky’s general existence show on his face too badly. “What is with Rain lately and calling you whenever I seem a little bit off?”

“He’s a smart kid,” said Prapai, getting in the driver’s seat. “When you won’t let him love you, he delegates.” He glanced over and caught a tiny smile crossing Sky’s face. His heart swelled.

Using a combination of wheedling, cajoling, and careful application of puppy eyes, Prapai got Sky to curl up on the couch in his office with a cup of tea and a new volume of manga. He sat at the foot of the sofa and did the work on his tablet that he could, pretending he didn’t notice Sky’s toes sneaking under his thigh. Eventually, though, he needed files that were on his desktop computer, and moved there with some disappointment. He worked as fast as he could manage.

Sky finished his manga and stretched out on the couch.

“I’m almost done,” Prapai said. “Maybe half an hour?”

“It’s fine,” said Sky, pulling out his phone.

They worked in silence for a while more, each tapping away at their respective devices, and then Sky excused himself to the bathroom, abandoning his phone on the couch. Prapai waited until he was out of sight, then dove for it, waking it before it could lock. He opened the contacts app and skimmed for new ones. He spotted two that he knew hadn’t been there before, Win and Pharm, and copied them down onto a sticky note.

By the time Sky returned, the phone was back where he left it.

On the drive home, Sky suddenly blurted out, “Aren’t you going to ask me what’s wrong?”

“I know what’s wrong,” said Prapai, startled. “Did you want to talk about it?”

“You do?”

“Some sort of nasty mix of top drop and your worst fears coming true. Right?”

Sky opened and closed his mouth a few times in Prapai’s periphery.

“Not my worst fears,” he muttered eventually. Prapai elected to ignore that.

When they pulled into the parking lot, Prapai got out of the car, rounded it, and was met with a sudden armful of Sky.

“Love you,” he whispered.

“I love you too,” Prapai whispered back.

Hi, is this Win from rope bite?

Who is this?

My name is Prapai. I got your number from my boyfriend, Sky. This is true, even if it implies Sky gave it to him.

Oh cool! What’s up?

“Where are we going?” asked Sky suspiciously, but he got in the car as requested. Prapai only grinned at him.

Sky needled him about it most of the drive there, and Prapai cheerfully ignored him and chattered about everything else remotely relevant to their lives. When they got close, Sky went suspiciously quiet.

Prapai pulled into a parking space, and Sky said, “This is the rope bite location.”

“Yep!” said Prapai. “Grab the bag from the backseat, will you?” Sky did as asked, and peered inside. Spotting the coils of rope—his coils of rope—he glared at Prapai without heat. Unrepentant, Prapai led the way indoors. Sky was too distracted to notice the familiar car parked a few spaces down, but Prapai wasn’t, and he just nodded happily to himself.

They were greeted by a general uproar as they walked inside. Several people called out Sky’s name, including Rain, who was sitting with Phayu a few paces away. While Sky was spluttering about that, Prapai turned his attention to the blond guy with his bangs pulled back in a ponytail who had appeared at his elbow with a clipboard.

“Prapai, right? I’m Win,” said the guy. “Can I get you to fill out this form and show me your ID?”

By the time Prapai was finished getting checked in, acknowledging all risk and promising not to take photos, Sky had sat down with Rain and Phayu.

“Do you want to tie me again?” Rain was saying brightly.

“I—you want to?” said Sky, sounding flabbergasted.

“It was really nice, before the drop!” said Rain. “And we know what to expect now, and how to prevent it. And P’Phayu’s here, if you need backup!”

Sky turned around and shot Prapai his most suspicious glare. Prapai responded with his sunniest smile.

“You go down hard in rope, Rain?” asked Win, who had wandered over. “So does Team.”

“Practically instant subspace,” said Phayu. “Deep, too.”

"Sky, you two should hang out with us tonight,” offered Win, plopping down next to them. “I’m going to scene with Team, and we can keep each other company while our partners are blissing out in the rope.”

“Hia,” complained the boy who must be Team, knocking Win in the head fractiously with his knuckles.

“What? I love you, but you’re a shit conversationalist when you’re tied,” said Win, words belied by the absolutely besotted look on his face as he tilted his head back to talk to his boyfriend. Team gave a put-upon sigh and walked away again.

He was back within minutes with an armful of rope, and Prapai watched happily as a double scene emerged.

Sky looped rope around Rain’s chest, carefully checking the position, and then had Rain bring his arms in front. He made another two loops, binding Rain’s arms, stopping to do something apparently complicated in the back each time, before bringing the rope down over one shoulder, knotting it into the bands, and back up over the other shoulder. Rain started going glassy-eyed almost at once, swaying on the spot, but he managed to stay upright, aided at the end by a hand from Phayu on his shoulder, until Sky tied off the last knot and guided him to lay in his own lap.

Meanwhile, Win laced Team expertly into a cross-legged position before adding a simpler chest harness, as Team snarked at him the entire time.

“Your tension’s uneven, Hia. Too much slack in that one. Nope. Nope. Now there’s too much on the other side. Are you sure that band’s high enough?”

His voice tapered off as Win attached the chest harness to the leg tie, forcing him into a bent-forward position.

“Beautiful,” he told Team, stroking his hair. “You look so good for me.”

“Oh, fuck you, Hia,” Team slurred, and Win beamed at him. 

When he raised his head, he caught Sky’s eye. “Are you wondering if I’m really a shitty top?” he laughed. Sky blushed. “It’s fine. Tension’s a thing you can spend your whole rope life getting better at, so he’s giving me real feedback, but he’s also playing it up for fun. It’s part of our dynamic.”

“Rain doesn’t brat in rope, apparently,” said Sky, looking down at Rain.

Win laughed again. “He might, once the novelty wears off. Or he might not. He really does go down fast; you weren’t exaggerating.” He looked over at Phayu. “Did you want a partner, Phi? We can probably find someone to work with you.”

Phayu blinked, apparently startled to be addressed. “A partner for which…role?”

“Either. Or if you want to learn something, Pharm loves teaching.”

“I heard my name!” said an auburn-haired boy several paces away, bouncing over with a bright smile.

“Pharm, these are Sky’s friends, Prapai, Phayu, and Rain,” said Win, pointing them out in turn. Pharm gave each of them a polite yet excited wai, even Rain, who was by all appearances not paying any attention to anything. “I was just asking P’Phayu if there was anything he wanted to learn.”

“I’ve…never done this before,” said Phayu, and Prapai laughed.

“N’Rain, open your eyes, I’m not allowed to take a picture for you. The great Phayu, out of his depth. I’ve never seen it happen.” Rain’s eyelids fluttered, and he gave Phayu an appraising look before shutting them again and smiling.

Phayu was glaring at Prapai now. Extremely used to this, Prapai just gave his best shit-eating grin and batted his eyelashes.

“That’s fine!” said Pharm, apparently choosing to ignore all of this. “Let me show you how to do a single column.”

He and Phayu set up with a length of rope each. Pharm looped it around his own calf several times and waited for Phayu to follow suit. “So this is the bight,” he told Phayu, indicating the loop end of the rope. “And these are the running ends. You’re going to put a finger under the cuff from this side and bring the running ends across it like this. Hand the running ends to yourself, basically, and make a finger gun to hold them. Yep. Now you’re going to pass the bight under the cuff. Use your index finger to maintain the tension the whole time. Now you’re going to make a loop with the running ends—no, keep the running ends on the inside, or it’ll fall apart—and put the bight through it. Keep hold of the tension, and pull the knot tight. There you go! That’s a square knot! Now practice that about eight hundred times.”

“He’s not even exaggerating,” said Win. “Everything builds off of the single columns. My rope instructor liked to joke that every seven years or so he’d realize he’d been doing single columns wrong the entire time.”

“Why’s it called a single column?” asked Prapai.

“Oh, because it’s a cuff going around one column,” said Sky. “The ‘column’ can be an arm or a leg, a chest, a waist.”

“If it’s going around two columns, like both wrists, it’s a double column. As you might guess from the name,” said Win. “How’re you doing, baby?”

Team hummed. “I can do another song, probably.” His voice was still slurred, long pauses breaking up the words like it cost him effort to talk.

“Song?” asked Prapai.

“The music,” said Win, nodding at the ceiling. It was unobtrusive enough that Prapai had barely noticed it was playing at all. “Pretty reliable way to tell time even when you’re down.”

And at the end of the next song, he started untying Team, carefully guiding the rope off with the same care he’d used to put it on, helping Team straighten his back and then his legs before pulling him into a hug. Team draped himself across Win’s chest and smiled into it.

Sky took this as a cue to start untying Rain, who made no effort to assist, and in fact whined at Sky wordlessly.

“Oh, stop,” said Sky, but his voice was gentle. “You have to come out at some point.” Rain grumpily allowed Sky to finish taking off the rope, and then sighed happily as Sky gathered him up carefully into his lap. He buried his nose in Sky’s neck and appeared to go to sleep on his shoulder. Phayu watched them carefully in between iterations of the single column he was tying and re-tying on his own leg. Prapai was also watching carefully. He didn’t want to help too much, or Sky wouldn’t feel as accomplished, but he definitely didn’t want anything to go wrong, or Sky would never touch rope again.

“I’m hungry, Hia,” complained Team.

“Mm,” said Win. “You want snacks?”

“Yes,” said Team, sitting up and giving him a sunny smile. Win smiled back and left to rummage through a bag, from which he removed a package of chips and handed them to Team, who opened them and immediately started stuffing them into his mouth.

“Oh, don’t be gross, Team,” said a girl with long, wavy hair lying on the floor a few paces away, having her leg tied into the bent position. Team got up and knee-walked over to her to continue what sounded like a well-worn argument. Pharm got pulled into it as well, but refused to take sides, just smiling fondly at both until a quiet giant of a man came up and laid a hand on his shoulder. Pharm looked up at once, and if Prapai thought his smile was fond before, now it was radiant.

“Oh, are they together?” asked Sky as the tall man pulled Pharm to his feet and then into a kiss. “That explains some things.”

“Like why Pharm acts like a rope leader despite not being one?” said Win, sitting back down. “Yeah. He used to self-tie for years before he met Dean, so even though he’s a bottom at heart, he knows a lot about topping.”

“Topping…?” started Prapai.

“Rope topping and bottoming,” clarified Win. “I can’t say I don’t know more than I’d like about my friends’ sexual preferences, but they’re not particularly relevant here.”

They were interrupted at that moment by Team, crawling unsteadily across the floor.

“Hia,” he groaned. “Drop.”

Win hummed sympathetically and opened his arms. Team climbed back into his lap and pillowed his head on Win’s shoulder, still eating his snacks. Win rubbed his back and continued talking.

“Tul’s basically on his way out of the scene, though, so we’re all trying to talk Pharm into officially taking the position.”

Sky was looking back and forth between Team and Win, brow furrowed, and Win must have noticed, because he said, “You can do everything right and still drop. But you shouldn’t let that stop you. Just keep checking in with each other so you can head it off.” His voice was gentle.

“That makes sense,” said Rain, who was apparently back with them. He was still curled into Sky, but his eyes were alert once more, darting curiously around at all of them.

“How are you feeling?” Sky asked him. Rain sat up a little and gave him a bright smile.

“Amazing!”

The corner of Sky’s mouth twitched up at that. Prapai felt his heart leap in his chest.

“P’Pai, are you going to play?” asked Rain, looking over at him. Prapai blinked.

“If Sky wants to. But he’s taking care of you, I don’t want to distract him.”

“You should tie him!” said Rain, turning back to Sky at once. “I can stay right here if you want.”

Sky looked unsure, but eventually nodded.

“I can’t do anything complicated from here,” he said, indicating Rain in his lap, “but I could practice my double column?”

Prapai scooted closer and offered up his wrists. Sky picked up one of the discarded ropes, brought the ends together, and ran it through his hands until he found the middle. He looped it around Prapai’s wrists a few times, carefully making the bands even. Then he tied it off, ran the ends around the middle of the cuff to split Prapai’s wrists, and tied off again. Prapai tested the cuff, and felt his face split into an involuntary smile. He wasn’t getting out of this anytime soon. He imagined Sky tying him like this before fucking his face. He could attach it to the bed so Prapai couldn’t go anywhere.

“You like it?” asked Sky quietly, and Prapai nodded, still smiling.

“Do I even want to know how much of that you orchestrated?” Sky asked him as they left the bite, snagging the keys from Prapai’s pocket.

“Probably not,” said Prapai without thinking about it. Sky climbed into the driver’s seat, which was when Prapai actually parsed the ramifications of Sky taking the keys.

“Hey wait,” he started.

“You may not have gone under, but you’re distracted as hell, get in the passenger seat before you wreck us,” said Sky, but he was smiling, the real, full-face smile that Prapai hadn’t seen in days. It made a matching one break out on Prapai’s own face, and he got into the passenger seat obediently. Sky tossed the rope bag in the back and pulled out of the parking lot.

“Text P'Win for me, we owe P'Korn a goddamn gift basket for having the balls to chat up Rain right in front of P’Phayu.”

Prapai nodded and pulled out his phone. He was halfway through composing a text when he remembered that Sky wasn’t supposed to know he had Win’s number.

“Hey, wait a second—” he said again, and Sky started laughing.

“You actually have it, don’t you, you psycho? You’re fucking lucky I love you.”

Well. Prapai wasn’t going to argue with that.