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Cul-De-Dads

Summary:

Inspired by the fic maple bay dad's group chat.

Damien: Joesph, in any unlikely circumstances you wouldn’t have happened to invite our newest Neighbour, I haven't had the pleasure of becoming acquainted yet.

 

Joesph: Well actually I baked him some cookies and invited him, he said he was coming so that’s you chance, I think.

 

Craig: Dude!! Now I can't w8 for the BBQ even more.

 

Damien: Hugo, please help Craig’s language skills...

 

Hugo: I’m in class and that hurts to try and read.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Chapter 1: Who's that?

Summary:

The guys find out about a new dad in town

Chapter Text

Craig: Dudes! Guess who I saw!!!

 

Damien: I will indulge. Whom did you see?

 

Hugo: Appreciated Damien.

 

Damien: While I appreciate the sentiment writing well is not challenging, it is the bare minimum, is it not?

 

Mat: Craig, who did you see?

 

Craig: The newest dad member of the cul-de-sac and even better is that he is my bro

 

Brain: Do not you call most everyone your ‘bro’

 

Craig: Nah bro

 

Mat: He just came into the Coffee spoon the other day, pretty funny guy.

 

Robert: He is nice to look at.

 

Hugo: I think his kid is in my class.

 

Joesph: Remember the Barbeque tomorrow guys 3 pm

 

Damien: Joesph, in any unlikely circumstances you wouldn’t have happened to invite our newest Neighbour, I haven't had the pleasure of becoming acquainted yet.

 

Joesph: Well actually I baked him some cookies and invited him, he said he was coming so that’s you chance, I think.

 

Craig: Dude!! Now I can't w8 for the BBQ even more.

 

Damien: Hugo, please help Craig’s language skills...

 

Hugo: I’m in class and that hurts to try and read.

 

Hugo is offline

 

Mat: Craig if you're trying to be relevant Carmesita said ‘that’s not it’

 

Damien: I agree

 

Brain: Just finished Mowing my lawn, Looking like the best on the Cul-de-sac.

 

Mat: Feeling competitive?

 

Craig: 🥇🥇🥇

 

Damien: My garden is clearly superior 💐

 

Robert: 😴

 

Damien: 😓

 

Joesph: ROBERT! Are you coming to the BBQ tomorrow?

 

Robert: Only for the company

 

Joesph: Ah! Good

 

Damien is offline

 

Robert: Blaming Joesph.

 

Joesph: 😶

 

Craig: Anyone want to come on a jog, I got river!

 

Brain is offline

 

Robert is offline

 

Craig: I’ll take that as a no see ya

 

Craig is offline

 

Mat is offline

Chapter 2

Summary:

Dadreader enters the chat (literally)

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Joesph: So? Are we going to invite Y/N to the group chat

 

Mat: Well, he is a dad in the cul-de-sac. I’d assume so.

 

Robert: No.

 

Damien: Pardon?

 

Hugo: …

 

Brain: …

 

Damien: …

 

Mat: …

 

Craig: …

 

Joesph: I thought you liked him, Rob.

 

Robert: Don’t call me that or I'll gouge your eyeballs out with a rusty spoon

 

Brain: …

 

Damien: …

 

Mat: …

 

Craig: …

 

Hugo: Maybe a new group chat?

 

Joesph: sure.

 

Brain: okay.

 

Damien: Perfectly, fine.

 

Mat: sounds good.

 

Craig: Yeah Dude!!

 

Hugo: Robert?

 

Robert: 👍

 

Damien: Done!

 

Craig: Woah SWEET DUDE!!

 

Hugo: Why Craig, why?

 

Craig: That’s my bro

 

Brian: Isn’t everyone your dude?

 

Craig: I swear we did this before

 

Damien: Perhaps.

 

Cul-de-dads II

 

Craig: DUDE!!

 

You: Oh, Hey Craig!

 

Damien: Greetings and salutations.

 

You: Woah why can I see Craig’s and Damiens chat? Am I a hacker? Oh Shit. My names on this account the feds are going to come for me. Oh god When I get arrested someone take care of Amanda. Raise her like your own. How to destroy a computer?

 

Damien: You can run Darik’s Boot and Nuke from a startup flash drive. But once you’ve done that it’s best to physically destroy the platters altogether.

 

Craig: Dude, how do you kno that

 

Damien: How did you mis-spell ‘Know’?

 

Damien: Also, Victorians were well versed in Information security.

 

You: How do I do all of that?

 

Hugo: @You, this is a group chat so we can all talk in one space.

 

You: So, I'm not going to jail?

 

Joesph: I hope not...

 

Robert: But who knows?

 

Mat: Well okay Robert, Y/N I hope your settling in and unpacking well.

 

You: Yeah! Pretty much all unpacked apart from a few of Manda’s things she says she won't need for a few months till college.

 

Damien: If it is any consolation, I am in a similar situation with Lucien, so I understand the anguish you are likely feeling.

 

You: Thanks Damien. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one, maybe we could help each other through it?

 

Brain: Wow

 

You: Oh, I forgot everyone was here, this is weird.

 

Craig: It’s fine Dude takes getting used 2

 

Hugo: Craig, please.

 

Robert: 🙄

 

Mat: Anyways Y/N remember I'm always down at the Coffee Spoon if you are feeling bored, coffee and a nice chat if you’d like?

 

Brain: I give up trying to understand Craig sometimes

 

Joesph: Does using numbers take out less effort than just normal texting.

 

Craig: Ya FR FR

 

Mat: Carmensita said that means ‘for real’ I don’t understand the context though.

 

Hugo: No one understands the context, probably not even Craig.

 

Joesph: It’s a phrase ive heard a few times at the youth church dances.

 

You: I’m coming to the Coffee Spoon Mat, Watch out.

 

Robert: Oddly threatening, nice.

 

Brain: Woah, he speaks

 

Mat: Do I need to watch out?

 

You: Is there any (Insert Banana Bread name)?

 

Mat: I’ll get you a slice.

 

You: Yes

 

Damien: I am also at the Coffee Spoon. Enjoying a nice coffee, the Coffee spoon is always best at this time of day nice and quiet, well and during the open mic nights, some good talent always finds themselves here in the Coffee spoon.

 

You: Wow, sweet is everyone at the Coffee Spoon?

 

Robert: No.

 

Brain: Just the three of you, I think.

 

Hugo: I’m at school. Middle school kids are wild. I should go

 

Brain: I’m at work too.

 

Joesph: I’m at the church. I got a session soon

 

Craig: I might stop in at the Coffee spoon after my jog I got river with me. See ya dudes

 

Craig is offline

 

Hugo is offline

 

Joesph is offline

 

Brian is offline

 

You are offline

 

Mat is offline

 

Damien is offline

 

Robert is offline.

Notes:

Who is your favourite dadsona and why tell me all about him. Mine id Damien i love how passionate he is and how much he knows about flowers (I love trying to make bouquets) Also he's trans and loves dogs and his style is impeccable yeah he's amazing.

Notes:

This is currently discontinued and finished unless i find the time and creativity to return