Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Bill smiled down at Dipper, his fingers carding through the boy’s tangled brown hair. The younger teen had fallen asleep while they were watching a film, and with Dipper’s face pressed against Bill’s chest and his arm around the blond’s waist, it would be absolutely criminal for the demon to try and move.

His fingers ghosted over the shell of Dipper’s ear, and the younger of the two shifted slightly, his hand fisting in the other’s shirt and his leg winding itself around one of Bill’s. With a small chuckle, Bill swept the messy fringe out of Dipper’s eyes, a smile tugging at his lips as he watched the boy’s sleeping face. Bill had visited Dipper in his dreams more times than he cared to count, little had he known that the real show was taking place on the outside of the kid’s head. With Dipper’s nose wrinkled at the bridge as it was crushed against Bill, his lashes casting shadows down slightly chubby cheeks and his lips lightly parted, a sigh of a breath puffing out every now and then, Bill was starting to see why Mabel always insisted that her twin resembled a kitten.

Bill’s hand fell down the side of Dipper’s head, fingers brushing down his neck and moving back up to stroke against Dipper’s jaw. With the way they were now, Dipper laid out vulnerably before him, no one in the house to stop him, Bill thought about how easy it would be to snap his Pine Tree’s neck. How quickly he could snuff out the only thing standing in his way. Something about the thought made his free fist clench, and he frowned down at it. Stupid human emotions, he thought, stopping me from killing cute things.

“B-Bill?” A sweet, sleepy voice mumbled.

Bill looked down at the boy. His eyes were still shut, his breathing steady, though not as slow as it had been a moment ago. Dipper’s cheeks were slightly flushed, and against his stomach Bill felt that the boy’s heart was beating especially fast.

“Bill?” Dipper mumbled again, his fist tightening around Bill’s shirt and his forehead creasing with worry. 

Bill chuckled, “Yes, Pine Tree?”

Dipper seemed to relax at the other’s voice, his hand unwinding from Bill’s shirt in favour of pressing tightly against his back, drawing himself closer to the blond man. “Mmm,” Dipper moaned, dark brown eyes flicking about rapidly behind their lids. A moment passed, and then quietly Dipper sighed, “I love you, Bill.”

Bill blinked once. Then twice. Despite being quiet, it was easy to make out. Not so easy to process, however.

Dipper had just said he loved him.

Bill felt the urge to laugh at how stupid he’d been, and at how obvious Dipper had been. How hadn’t he noticed it before? The way Dipper’s eyes followed him when the boy thought Bill wasn’t looking, the way his hands always lingered against his skin a second longer than they had to, the way Mabel always found an excuse to get out of plans the three had so that it was just Dipper and Bill.

It had been so, so obvious.

Bill smirked down at Dipper – he could have some fun with this.

And yet, in that moment, Dipper wriggled his nose, nuzzling his forehead into Bill’s chest, and the blond couldn’t help the surge of fondness rising in his chest. Bill frowned – that was new. Dipper mumbled something incoherent, his hand traveling from the demon’s back to press against his stomach, and Bill felt warmth blossom out from where Dipper’s hand was poised.

Bill was hit by an overwhelming urge to- He grinned. He had never been one to ignore an overwhelming urge before. Shuffling down, Bill wriggled until he and Dipper were at eye level, and without thinking too much about it he pressed his lips against Dipper’s, just to see what it was like. He didn’t expect the sudden warmth that radiated through him. It started at his lips and slowly made its way through his whole body, a mix of heat and tingling and sparking and wanting. He moved a hand to press against Dipper’s cheek, the other winding around the boy’s waist, just like he’d read about in the books he found under Shooting Star’s bed.

He stayed there for a few seconds – not moving, feeling nothing but the warmth of the skin pressed against his own, and he sighed out of his nose, eyes fluttering open and-

Dipper was staring at him.

Bill leaned back quickly, eyes scanning over the brunet’s features, searching for some kind of reaction. Dipper looked shocked, but there was no fear in his eyes, and Bill would have breathed a sigh of relief if it weren’t for the lips being suddenly pressed against his own.

“Mmph!” Bill exclaimed in surprise, eyes widening as Dipper’s arms wound their way around his neck. Bill recoiled, and he fell off the sofa, dragging Dipper down with him, the boy landing on Bill’s chest. Their lips never parted. Dipper bit Bill’s lip, and the blond’s lips parted in surprise, his eyes clamping shut at the feeling of something wet push past them and prod curiously against his tongue. Pressure was building up in his throat, and he wasn’t sure if the sensation was pleasant or not. Slowly, he brought his hands up to Dipper’s shoulders and pushed on them until the boy’s face was a few inches from his own.

Dipper’s eyes were wide, his pupils dilated and cheeks flushed, his breath coming in short gasps. “I’m sorry,” he murmured, but made no move to get up.

Bill just stared at him. What could he say? It’s okay? So am I? I’ll forgive you if you just do that again? He opened his mouth to say something, anything, to rid the boy’s eyes of the embarrassment that was slowly bleeding into the brown, but nothing came out. “Uh,” Bill drawled, his expression probably the dumbest it had been since Moses had asked him for the Promised Land, and he blinked up at the boy. “Wow, you and your sister kiss way differently!” He finally settled on saying.

The look of horror that fell on to Dipper’s face was enough to have Bill cracking up, and when Dipper realised he was joking he glared (read: pouted) down at him. His anger soon subsided to relief, and something else, however, and Dipper took a deep breath before starting. “Bill, I-”

Bill pressed a finger to Dipper’s lips, “Shhh, Pine Tree,” he interrupted, and moved his hand from Dipper’s mouth to the side of his neck, pulling him down slowly. “Not done yet.”

Chapter Text

This was not good.

In fact, this was the exact opposite of good. This was so far away from good it was almost as bad as Mabel’s cooking.

Dipper Pines was stuck. 

Worse still, he was stuck right on the edge of the forest, in hunting season, in the middle of the day. If a human saw him, he was a goner. He’d be shot and stuffed, or sold to a zoo, or given to scientists as a lab rat.

His Great Uncle had warned him of the dangers of the forest, told him not to go looking for humans. He had told him that everything he could ever hope to know about them he could find out from one of the many books the old man had collected throughout his life. 

But had the young cervitaur listened?

A crash a few feet away startled Dipper. His ears twitched and he listened closely, his heart leaping into his chest when he heard voices. Human voices. The crash came again, closer this time, and panic rose in Dipper’s chest. He crossed his eyes as he looked up, hands reaching blindly to wrap around his antlers, feeling around for the spot where the snare wrapped around them, holding him in place.

He heard another crash, closer this time, and one of the voices ordered the others to shush. Dipper looked around him, but saw no people lurking in the trees, waiting to pounce. He breathed a sigh of relief.

And then he heard the gunshot.

Dipper couldn’t help the surprised yelp that tore its way from his throat. Before it could travel far, though, the sound was stifled by a hand being pressed tightly against his mouth. “Shhhh!” A voice commanded.

Dipper froze, and the hand slipped away from his lips, leaves crunching under the hunter’s feet as he made his way around Dipper. He crouched down in front of the cervitaur, a smile playing at his lips as he looked Dipper up and down. “You’re in quite the sticky situation here, aren’t you kid?” The man picked up a small twig, poking Dipper in the face with it. “Get it? Sticky?”

Dipper glared at the hunter, but did as he said and refrained from making any noise. This man was obviously not with the other group of hunters, and if it came down to a fight he was sure that one would be a lot easier to handle than a group.

The hunter had messy bright yellow hair, and the blue eye that wasn’t hidden by the thick waves glowed such a bright blue that Dipper wondered if the man was a human at all. He wore a yellow and black flannel shirt over blue jeans, and muddy brown hiking boots, bright red socks slightly sticking out of them. He didn’t seem to have a gun on him, and it helped Dipper to relax a little as he felt the hunter’s eyes appraising him.

And then he pulled out a knife.

Dipper’s eyes blew wide with shock, and his legs started thrashing, kicking out at anything as he began to panic.

The hunter just stared at him, amusement shining clear as day in his eyes, and it made Dipper pause. “Are you quite finished?” The hunter asked, a wide and toothy smile stretching across his face as Dipper simply stared at him, bewildered. Dipper nodded. “Good,” the hunter said, and reached out to wrap a hand around one of Dipper’s antlers.

“What are you doing!?” Dipper gasped, hand instinctively reaching up to wrap around the hunter’s wrist, halting any more movement.

The hunter raised an eyebrow, waving the knife in front of his face. “I’m cutting you lose. What did you think?”

Dipper eyed the man with distrust, before figuring that really, he had nothing to loose. If the hunter hacked off an antler, it would grow back eventually. If he tried to capture Dipper, well… he’d deal with that if and when it occurred. Dipper released the man’s wrist and dropped his hand back down to his chest, folding it under the other.

The hunter smiled again, stretching up and sliding his knife between Dipper’s antler and the rope, slicing through the offending snare trap with ease. He moved on to the second antler, and within seconds, Dipper was free.

As soon as he heard the last piece of rope snap, Dipper bolted to his feet, running away from the direction he knew the hunters were headed. When Dipper was back behind the cover of the trees, though, he stopped, and turned around.

The hunter was still standing in the clearing, his knife back out of sight, and he was watching Dipper with sad eyes. The young cervitaur frowned, shaking his head at his own stupidity as he walked back towards the hunter, cursing himself with every step closer to the danger he took.

“Thank you,” he said, when he was close enough to be heard, and immediately those blue eyes were alight again, a smile spreading across the hunter’s face.

“Don’t mention it, kid!” He said, beaming as he reached out to pat Dipper on the shoulder. His fingers brushed over the small, tree-shaped mark on Dipper’s arm. “A Pine Tree,” the hunter mused, tracing the brown marking with a finger that sent shivers up Dipper’s spine. “Well! I guess I’ll see you around, Pine Tree!” The hunter exclaimed, and just like that, he was gone. Blown away in the blink of an eye, like dust thrown to the wind.

Dipper frowned. He had never heard of a creature that could do that before. He made a mental note to ask Grunkle Ford about it when he got home.

Chapter Text

Pine Tree

5:51

Bill, where are you?

Pine Tree

5:59

I need you to come home. Now.

Pine Tree

6:07

Scrap that – I want you to come home.

Pine Tree

6:10

Bill, if you do not reply in five minutes I will summon your ass here.

Bill Cipher

6:14

Geez, Pine Tree. Relax. I’m busy. I’ve scheduled a lot on my to-do list.

Pine Tree

6:15

You don’t have a to-do list!

Pine Tree

6:23

Bill!

Bill Cipher

6:24

Yes I do

Bill Cipher

6:24

See:

Pine Tree

6:25

…

Pine Tree

6:29

…

Pine Tree

6:31

…

Chapter Text

Dipper had been at work when he’d received the call, sitting idly behind the mystery shack till and praying for something to occupy his mind. He’d answered the phone on the first ring, surprised to hear the voice of his son’s headmistress addressing him. At Bill’s raised eyebrow, Dipper pressed the button to put the phone on speaker.

“Mr Pines, would it be possible for you to get to the school immediately.” Mrs Mitchell asked. Her voice sounded strained, and Dipper felt a spike of fear that something was wrong.

Dipper glanced across the room at Mabel, who nodded quickly, worry making her own eyes gleam. “Of course,” Dipper answered the head mistress. “Is Adam okay?”

Bill sniggered at the name. He had elected to write the name Adam on the adoption paperwork, despite Dipper telling him not to, and had named the other child Eve. He had thought it would be ironic to give the children of a gay demon blatantly Christian names.

“He’s fine,” Mrs Mitchell answered quickly. “We just have a few concerns about his home life. Would it be possible to bring Mrs Pines with you?”

Dipper opened his mouth to correct the woman about the gender of his spouse but Bill stopper him, clamping his gloved hand over the brunet’s mouth. “That would be fine,” Bill answered in Dipper’s voice. “We’ll be there in about ten minutes.” 

The woman hung up, and Bill released Dipper, grinning when Dipper glared at him. “What did you tell her that for?”

Bill rolled his eyes, “For being heteronormative. Now come on! We’re gonna be late!” He grabbed Dipper’s hand and dragged him across the shop floor, not stopping to wave goodbye to Mabel as he dragged Dipper to the car. 

Pushing the brunet into the driver’s seat, Bill clambered over him and settled down on the passenger seat, his hand only leaving Dipper’s to buckle his seatbelt. Dipper payed no notice to the blond’s affection, used to it after over five years of marriage, and he pushed the car into gear.

True to Bill’s word, the pair arrived outside the school ten minutes later, the demon’s hand holding on to Dipper’s a little tighter than usual, not that the brunet minded. Bill all but dragged them into the school and up the corridor, his steps only just slow enough to be classified as a walk.

Before they reached the head’s office, a small child was running towards the pair, arms outstretched and smile wide. “Dad!” 

Bill grinned, letting go of Dipper to scoop the child up in his arms, throwing him a few feet in the air before catching him against his chest. Adam laughed, looking over Bill’s shoulder at Dipper with a happy smile. 

Dipper returned the smile, stepping closer to the two to pat the boy on the head, blond hair tickling his hand as he messed it up. “Where’s Aunty Mabel?” Adam asked, blinking at Dipper with an excited grin.

“She stayed at work so that me and your dad could come see what Mrs Mitchell wants,” Bill answered, setting the kid down on the floor and crouching down in front of him. At the mention of the teacher’s name, Adam grew sheepish, a light blush rising to his cheeks. A proud smirk overtook Bill’s face. “What did you do?” He asked, fighting a grin at the thought of his adopted son causing anarchy at the young age of seven.

A throat was cleared behind them, and Bill stood up, turning to see a petite woman standing just a few feet away from them. She had harsh features, a pointed nose and sharp cheekbones accentuated by the lack of hair framing her face, the brown locks pulled back in a neat bun. “Mr Pines,” she addressed Dipper, “Would you step through to my office, please?” 

Dipper nodded, the teacher’s stern tone reminding him of his own school experiences, making him tense. Mrs Mitchell turned on her heel and started walking towards a large wood door, and Dipper moved to follow her. Bill’s fingers reached out and wound around Dipper’s, and he gave the brunet’s hand a reassuring squeeze. Dipping into the man’s thoughts told Bill all he needed to know, and he set about weaving magic through Dipper’s mind to ease his nerves.

The woman walked around to the back of her desk, her hazel eyes boring into Dipper making him tense up, his hand squeezing Bill’s so hard it almost made the blond man worry. “I thought you said Mrs Pines would be available?” She asked, gesturing for the two men to take a seat. She hadn’t noticed the two’s interlocked hands just yet.

Bill sank into a seat, dragging Dipper down with him. “There isn’t a Mrs Pines,” he said with a devious smile, raising his hand and taking Dipper’s along with it. “I’m the other Mr Pines.”

Dipper’s eyebrows furrowed at that – why would Bill lie? He and Bill had agreed to keep their own names, much to Bill’s dismay, who was rather looking forward to the prospect of Dipper Cipher. The brunet soon disregarded his wonderings – it was better to go along with Bill’s whims than to waste magic on forcing a trip to the mindscape for a private moment to question them.

The woman’s features pinched, her lips puckering with distain as she took in the sight of the two men. “Right.” She tidied a few papers on her desk, muttering almost too quietly for Bill to hear, “That may explain some things.”

Bill sneered, not that she noticed, “Why are we here today, Mrs Mitchell?”

The woman looked up, hands stilling on the desk as she clasped them together. “We need to speak about Adam’s attire today, Mr Pines.”

Dipper frowned at that, peering over his shoulder and out the window to look at his son. He looked perfectly fine in his school uniform, tie tied and shoes shined. “What’s wrong with it?” He asked, turning back to the woman. 

She barked a short laugh before realising that Dipper was serious and recomposing herself. “Well, I- I mean he’s…” she trailed off, staring from one man to the other as if waiting for someone to jump out at her and reveal that she’d been ker-prank’d. “He’s wearing a skirt!” She managed to force out.

Both Dipper and Bill’s eyebrows furrowed, turning around in unison to look at Adam, who was, in fact, wearing a skirt. Bill was the first to turn back around. “It’s not above his knee, is it?”

The look on the woman’s face was priceless. Her mouth hung open and her eyes were wide, pupil’s fleeting from one man to another as she searched their expressions for answers. “He can’t- I mean to say- He’s a boy!” She finally settled on saying, a little shrilly.

“So?” Bill and Dipper countered together. Bill felt a twitch at his lips when it happened, glad to see that the magic binding their souls was still effective. It would remain that way until the day there was no more love between them.

“So,” the head teacher began, vindictiveness lacing her voice, “I won’t allow it. I don’t care what you people let him do at home, but in my school, boys wear trousers.”

Bill froze. Fire and ice fizzed in his blood as it became full of magic, stronger than the kind that normally filled his body, fuelled by his rage. Fire sparked between his fingers, the human body not meant to withstand this much power, and he shot a few tendrils of magic to various areas of the room, bleeding his body of the excess power. Figuring he may as well put the magic he was expending to good use, he carved a few dicks into the furniture around the room. That’ll teach her, he thought.

Bill was too busy trying to handle his own anger that he hadn’t noticed his husband boiling with a similar rage beside him. 

Dipper exploded. 

Shooting up from his chair, Dipper released himself from Bill’s grasp, hands balling into fists at his side, body shaking with rage. Bill had to admit, it was kind of hot. “My son wears what he feels comfortable in,” Dipper said, his calm but hard tone contradicting the heated anger radiating from his body. He glared at the woman with such intensity that Bill felt a swell of pride in his chest. “If you won’t let my son be comfortable, we’ll move him to a different school. Your choice.”

Bill sucked a breath through his teeth, not sure if it would be safe at this moment in time to remind Dipper that this was the only school in Gravity Falls.

“I know, Bill,” Dipper said, reading Bill’s thought, and the blond frowned. I didn’t know Pine Tree could do that. Dipper rolled his eyes, returning his attention to an unamused looking Mrs Mitchell. “So, will my son be returning to class, or will I be taking he and his sister home with me?”

The head mistress looked ready to burst, her cheeks taking on a reddish hue as she looked away from Dipper, whether from anger or embarrassment Bill didn’t know. “We’ll email you with a list of alternative schools this evening, Mr Pines.”

Yellow fire lit up Dipper’s clenched fist.

Bill grabbed the hand before the teacher saw the flames, extending his magic to smother them only to have it bounced back at him. Standing quickly, Bill tugged on Dipper’s hand, pulling the man out of the teacher’s office. He fired a glare at the woman over his shoulder. The teacher flinched at the intensity of his gaze, and Bill chortled. She was afraid of him. Good.

When they stepped out of the office, Adam ran towards them, throwing himself into Dipper’s arms with a delighted squeal. Dipper smiled at him, despite still being furious with Mrs Mitchell, and said, “C’mon. Lets go get your sister. We’re going home.”

If Adam was confused by the announcement, he didn’t show it, simply wriggling out of Dipper’s arms to walk him to the classroom Eve should be in. Dipper knocked on the classroom door when Adam told him to stop, and a quiet voice called out to him to ‘enter’.

Bill noticed his daughter immediately – Adam’s twin sister. The two had the same blonde hair, same blue eyes, and same mischievous smirks – it was part of the reason why Bill and Dipper had chosen them. She grinned when she saw her parents, swiping her colouring sheets into her bag and running across the classroom to wrap her arms around Bill. 

She was out of the class before Dipper had even told her teacher that she was leaving.

“Why are we going home early, Dad?” She asked Bill when they made it outside.

“You’re not going to school here anymore, because your head teacher is apugno asinum plenum foraminibus,” Bill answered. Dipper slapped his upper arm, and Bill lauhged. “What? They don’t know what it means!”

Ignoring her parents, Eve asked, “Where are we going to school now, then?”

Bill patted her on the head. “We’ll see if there’s anywhere nearby, and if not, I can teach you.”

Dipper laughed, “You’re going to teach them? I’d love to see that!”

Bill pulled a face of mock indignation. “And what’s that supposed to mean?”

Dipper shook his head, clicking the button that unlocked the car and opening the door for the kids to clamber in. “I just think it’d be funny to watch you try.” Bill delved into Dipper’s mind just in time to hear him finish, and fail.

“Dipper darling,” Bill said, wrapping an arm around the brunet’s shoulders. He didn’t miss the shiver that ran down his Pine Tree’s spine at the use of his name. “I possess the knowledge of the centuries. I have lived for millennia and I see everything. I think I can give a couple of seven year olds a standard education.”

Dipper thought about that for a second. Bill could teach them history and maths, then he could teach them English, and maybe Mabel would be willing to teach them art and the Stans could teach them about science and business respectively. They’d have a fairly well-rounded education. “Okay,” He said, wrapping an arm around Bill’s waist and stretching his neck to peck his cheek. “We’ll give it a go.”

Bill grinned. “Okay!” Then, leaning in through the open back window of the car, he yelled, “Now who wants pancakes!” He pressed his mouth against Eve’s cheek and blew, making a farting sound that had both kids squealing with laughter.

Dipper rolled his eyes. He’d said it before and he’d say it again - Bill was the biggest kid of them all. A smile tugging at his lips, Dipper circled the car and swung himself into the drivers seat, turning to face the three grinning blondes in the back seat. “Do any of you know which of these cars is Mrs Mitchells?”

Bill grinned, and Adam shrugged, but Eve pointed at a little green sedan across the lot. “Thanks, honey,” he said, and stared at the car. “Ignibus.” Her car burst into yellow flames.

“Dad!” The three in the back drawled, scolding Dipper, and the man rolled his eyes with a smile.

“I know, I know!” He said, the flames dispersing with a wave of his hand, leaving no damage in their wake. “Felt good though.”

The back door slammed shut as Bill climbed in the back with the kids, sitting in the seat in the middle and leaning over the centre console. “Dad~?” He said, his voice a playful whine. Dipper raised an eyebrow, and Bill rested his head on Dipper’s shoulder, nuzzling his cheek against Dipper’s. “I love you.”

Dipper rolled his eyes, but leaned into the touch. “I love you too.”

Chapter Text

When they returned back to the camp, clothes torn to shreds and throats crying out for water, Mabel ran straight to her brother. Slender arms wrapping around his neck so tightly his face started to turn purple, he returned the gesture, hands hesitating over the girls waist for a moment, as if unsure of where to touch, until they finally pressed against Mabel’s back, tugging her close to him. Mabel didn’t want to let go, Bill could tell that just by looking at her. After all, just a few hours ago she had believed that she would never see her brother again.

It was a whole minute before Dipper somehow managed to prise her off of him, only just managing to keep hold of his consciousness, and once he had detached himself from her grip he crossed the small base camp the crew had set up, headed straight towards Bill. The blond leaned silently against a tree, watching the loving – if a tad awkward – sibling exchange with a cool air of indifference, burying the longing that urged him to reach out for the captain’s nephew. The last thing he needed the band of pirates surrounding the campfire to know was that he would love nothing more than to wrap his own arms around the slender brunet, holding him tight until the emptiness years of solitude had ingrained in his heart was filled.

When Dipper stood in front of Bill, the blond was glad of the shadows hiding the way his cheeks started to burn. Dipper looked furious – so angry and worried and curious and frustrated that it brought a sinister sheen to his eyes, more like the pirate he was supposed to be than Bill had ever seen him, and he’d be lying if he said that it wasn’t maddeningly attractive. “What happened?” Dipper ground out, eyes staring fervently into Bill’s.

Bill gulped. Mabel had been bitten by some kind of creature, the kind whose teeth were laced with a poison so potent it could kill a man in minutes, a few days ago. She had slunk off into the woods to die in peace, and she would have, had Bill not found her. Bill had managed to drag the girl to a place he had heard about in old legends, a waterfall with the power to heal any and all ills, but for a terrible price. Any person who dared drink the water would be forced to stay on the island of Gravity Falls - forever. Mabel had made him promise to not tell a soul – she knew that if her family found out about this, they would focus all their attention on getting her help, when what they really needed to be worrying about was the reason they were on the island in the first place. Their mission.

Bill cast a glance over the boy’s shoulder, eyes locking on to those of the girl staring back at him, and with a brief nod of understanding she ran towards the two, a wide smile splitting her face. “Dipper, it was amazing!” She all but yelled, skidding to a halt in the dirt and catching hold of Bill’s arm to steady herself. “We were ambushed by a heard of coconut-wielding winged-baboons! And one of them came flying at my head, teeth bared and claws poised and I was knocked unconscious! When I woke up, the monkeys were all gone - Bill had scared them off! I don’t know what would have happened if he hadn’t been there.”

Dipper blinked, first at the girl - who Dipper was starting to worry for all over again - and then at Bill. It was no secret that Dipper held no fondness for the blond, and that he didn’t trust Bill as far as he could throw him. It had been so clear to him, so obvious that Bill was only there for his own gains. His crew had ridiculed him for it, his captain reprimanded him for it, but he couldn’t shake the belief that there was something not quite right with Cipher. But now… now he wasn’t so sure. Yes, Bill was an arrogant arse with a bit of a drinking problem, who could say the most wonderful things to get people to do whatever he wanted – to make people want to do whatever he wanted. His most recent challenge was finding his way into Dipper’s pants, much to the brunet’s irritation. But if Bill would risk his life to save Mabel, then how bad could he be? Maybe Dipper had judged him too soon, gotten it wrong. It certainly wouldn’t be the first time.

Somewhere between Mabel’s recount of the story and Dipper’s epiphany, the blond had wandered off, and it took Dipper a few moments to spot a brief flash of blond hair venturing deeper into the forest. Muttering an excuse to Mabel that he didn’t even hear, Dipper dashed off through the treeline in pursuit, calling Bill’s name but receiving no response. He caught up to Bill in a matter of minutes, so far into the forest that the only light came from the stars and the only sounds were their own hurried footsteps. Dipper’s hand reached out, wrapping around Bill’s to halt him as he said, “Wait.”

Bill turned around quickly, Dipper’s hand still wrapped around his own giving him no choice but to stand close to the younger pirate. Too close. “What?” He asked, the words holding more venom than he had expected them to. Running away hadn’t worked – maybe head on confrontation would. Either way, he had to do something to make the kid trust him, before it drove him insane.

Dipper faltered. “You- you saved my sister.”

Bill raised an eyebrow, “Yes.”

There was a pause before Dipper said, “Thank you,” barely a whisper in the silent forest. 

Bill didn’t respond. He simply stared at Dipper, as if waiting for something else, his eyes seeming to taunt Dipper, urging him to do whatever it was the blond was expecting to come next. After a moment, Bill seemed to lose patience. “Well, I at least expected you to show some gratitude.”

Dipper frowned, “That’s what the thank you was for.”

Bill breathed a laugh through his nose. “Is that all your sister’s life is worth to you?” He took a step closer, a hint of a grin sliding across his face. His tongue darted out, wetting his lower lip as his eyes slid down to lock onto Dipper’s mouth.

Said mouth twitched, the beginnings of a smirk forming as Dipper realised where Bill was going with this. He said, “Please- you couldn’t handle it.”

Gold eyes glowed with amusement, teeth clamping down on Bill’s inner cheek to keep his grin from growing wider as he leaned in, voice stooping to a whisper, “Perhaps you’re the one who couldn’t handle it.”

Dipper paused for a moment – he knew this game. He knew how it worked, how to make someone feel like they were too afraid to kiss you. To make them want to prove themselves to you in the only way they could. And Dipper was not going to fall for it. He looked quickly down to Bill’s lips, then up to his eyes then back down, leaning ever closer but never close enough.

And then he was kissing Bill.

He had no idea how it had happened. His body seemed to move of its own accord, reaching up to grasp Bill’s collar and pull him forward so that their lips met in the middle, all fiery burning and heavy pressure and hot passion. The frustration of months of pent up tension all rushing out of them in this brief contact, meeting in an electrical storm of a moment’s touch.

Dipper pulled away first, startled, his hands falling away from the black trim of the blond’s coat and his feet tugging him back a few steps. But it was too late. Bill was staring at him with fire in his eyes, softer and warmer and more inviting than the flames that raged within those golden irises in times of fury, but still somehow the same. Bill’s fingers were pressed lightly against his lips, parted slightly from the shock, or perhaps the beginnings of a word.

Dipper turned tail and ran before he could hear them.

Bill watched Dipper go, but made no move to chase him. He didn’t need to. Dipper was warming up to him - Dipper had kissed him, and Bill wasn’t about to scare him away by confronting him so soon after. Bill sighed happily, falling backwards into a pile of leaves with a quiet hum, the fleeting ghost of sensation still tingling against his lips. Dipper had kissed him, of his own accord and everything. Bill couldn’t help the fluttering giggle that escaped him as he thought back, replaying those few seconds where Dipper had grabbed hold of his collar, over and over again. He had been so sure that Dipper was going to hit him then. Punch him and run away and avoid the obvious something between them like he had been doing all summer. He had never before experienced surprise quite like the kind that hit him when Dipper tugged him forwards for a kiss. It was so much better than he had imagined it being. He brought his fingers up to his lips again, dried now, and exhaled deeply.

A throat was cleared.

Bill looked up quickly, the dreamy look in his eyes gone in a flash as his eyes took on the cold cruelty of a criminal of the sea. Gideon stood a few feet away from him, lounging against a tree and staring across at Bill with smugness that no one that short should be able to accomplish.

Bill grinned when he saw the man, too wide and too toothy to be anything but threatening. “Can I help you with something?” Gideon opened his mouth to reply, but Bill spoke up before he could utter a word, “Don’t waste your breath asking. I wouldn’t piss on you if you were on fire.”

Gideon’s nose wrinkled, and Bill’s grin widened as he saw that he was getting to the man - and they hadn’t even been talking five minutes yet! Gideon said, “What do you think you’re doing with Dipper Pines?”

Bill’s grin turned sultry, “Wouldn’t you like to know?” He stood up from the pile of leaves, ignoring the few that stuck in his hair. “Unfortunately for you, a gentleman does not kiss and tell.” His words were accented with a wink as he stepped slowly closer to the much shorter pirate.

Gideon scoffed, “I hope you don’t think that kiss meant anything. That boy is probably back at camp right now, hanging on Wendy’s every word, just wishing that she would love him like you do.”

“Oh, I think you’re quite wrong about that.” Bill purred, not allowing the words to get to him. “You see, Pine Tree is finally starting to see me for the man I truly am.”

Gideon wrinkled his nose, “And what’s that? A one-eyed pirate with an anger problem?” Bill grit his teeth, and Gideon stood a little taller knowing that he’d gotten a raise out of the blond. “I’m serious, Cypher. Join me. We can take the ship, and then you can have the captains nephew for whatever you want.”

Bill chuckled darkly. “Oh no, little man.” The grin was back on his face, wider than Gideon had ever seen it, accentuated by the blood moon reflecting off of Bill’s eyes, making them glow an eerie yellow straight from the depths of hell. “If I win Pine Tree’s heart – and I will – he will give it to me willingly. Or not at all!”