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Chapter Text

{New Orleans, 1921}

Things weren't always like this, or maybe they were and they just didn’t remember it. Loki remembered parts of Asgard. Remembering its golden and high city, the people that were always there, and people they thought were their family. Though they can't remember it that well, it was where they were raised for most of their life.

What they remember clearly was how they ended up on Midgard, even if most of it was clouded with a fog of hate. They remembered messing up on something, leading them to find out that they were not the same as their brother. Sure, they knew they were different than him, but they wouldn't have guessed a different species. The fight with Odin was loud, he screamed and shouted that Loki thought their ears may bleed. They remembered the looks of everyone around them, the horrified look on their faces, the gasps, and the whispers. The disgust was written all over the man they thought was their brother.

They didn't remember much of the trial itself, but they remembered the fall. They fall from their world to the one they were forced to go to. The wind pushed their hair into their face, eyes locked onto the shrinking form of Asgard, a place they once called home. When the dark consumed them, the tears finally broke the damn they held. Small droplets fly upwards as they fall deeper into the darkness that seemed to swallow them down.

It felt like years till they hit the solid ground of Midgard. They didn't know where they fell, or if they would fit in, but all they cared about was surviving the new Hel they were thrown into. Standing up wasn't an easy task, as they just landed on their back after a who knows how far of a drop doesn't leave one’s back in perfect condition. They're not even going to talk about the pain that screamed into their ears as they tried to walk. Their ankles are slightly cut from the throned bushes and small animals around them. Green covered the land around them for a while till their eyes caught the building not a bit away.

As they walked, they came across what must have been a city. The large arches, and colorful painted houses, beads scattered on the streets. People of all colors partying. The women they saw had short haircuts and tube dresses with fringe around it. Some had pearl necklaces while others sported colorful beads. Their leather-covered body stood out from the people moving and dancing around them.

Pulling their shaking body into one of the few alleyways, they lit their weakened magic and changed their body into one of a petite woman with black bobbed hair. Their tight leather changed into a silk green dress that stopped just under their knees. Their bouts changed into a set of black pumps and sported a pearl necklace and matching earrings.
They turn their head back to the street, loud cheers and singing echoing off the sides of the building around them. With one hand resting on the wall for support, they limp back to the party. They try to keep on their feet as they watch the people around them. Something that looked like a parade moved in front of the people. The girl next to them pulled down their dress just low enough to show her naked chest to the people walking down the street. She grabs the beaded necklace that was handed to her before fixing her dress.
They look at the girl next to them with what must have been shocked because the girl turned back to them with a questioning look.
“Doll, you're not from around here, are ya?” the girl giggled at them, red-painted lips pulled up into a small snicker. Loki shocks their head in confusion. “Well, you see those guys? You show them your chest and they give you beads. Go on, try it!” the girl put her white-gloved hands on their shoulders, smiling happily. Loki looked back at the people, shrugging their shoulders. It's not like they knew anyone there. They did just like the girl next to them did, pulling down their dress for the people to see, and getting some beads in return. “Attagirl!”

Later Loki found out that the girl's fame was Ruth Smith. She was 21 and knew all about the city they stood in. ‘New Orlins’ is what she called it, and Loki must admit that they didn't mind the place. They don't mind talking with Ruth more the next morning. She talks in ways Loki didn't truly understand, but they pick up on a few things. When she asked about Loki’s name, they told them it was “Lucy James”

They had moved in with Ruth after she found out that her new friend didn't have a place to go at night. Loki didn't mind living in a small apartment with Ruth, even if it was brighter than they would have liked. They remembered their first really good night on Midgard, in a small cramped bed with their friend pressed right next to them.

Chapter Text

{New York, 2006}

A Christmas Galla, the same Galla Stark Industries holds every year. A Galla Tony Stark had to go to. Were there worse places to be than in a large ballroom with an unlimited bar? Of course, he could be in a long meeting he really didn't need to be at because Pepper thought it would be beneficial. Plus, the night truly wasn't that horrible, he got alcohol in his system and people to talk to. It would be hard to ruin the Galla with only three hours left.

His night was ruined 10 minutes after that. Justin Fucking Hammer walked through the door, a smirk plastered on his face. It only took him minutes to find some girl to hit on, or just make uncomfortable. It took him less time to find Tony and Pepper, and start talking about whatever terrible things he wanted to do at the time. His favorite thing to talk about was why Pepper would be better working for him than at Stark Industries. He even started to hit on her halfway through.

The thing that baffled the both of them was that Hammer had one of his arms around his wife, who just stood there as he flirted and commented on other women's bodies. The poor woman just seemed to stare off into space while her husband just kept talking. At one point Hammer looked over at her and had asked her something about Pepper’s body. She just looked over at her husband before nodding, going back to staring at anything else after.

Tony never understood why a woman like her would ever settle for a man like Hammer. Even Pepper could tell how beautiful she was. From her pearl-like skin to her tall stature, she looked like a goddess. Tony always guessed that she would have a stunning voice, but no one has ever heard her talk since her husband tends to talk over her, or just cut her off entirely.

The media doesn’t even know a lot about it because of the few times she leaves the house. When she does, she always wears something that covers every bit of her skin that wasn’t her face. When asked about that, Hammer just said that his wife didn’t like the attention. It didn't take a genius to see that the dress was too big for her and just looked unflattering.

She shuffled away when Hammer finally decided he was done talking with them, deciding to go find a different unsuspecting victim to talk to. His arm was still locked around her hips, keeping her close at all times. Tony must admit, even in the unflattering dress, she looks great.

An hour after that, Tony heard Hammer left with a woman who they assumed was his wife from one of his workers. Not asking anymore, he thought so too. As the time ticked by, more and more people started to leave. Some left with their partners while others left with some stranger, which was what Tony hoped he could do.

When the night was coming to a close, and only ten minutes till people would be told to leave, Tony grabbed his last glass of whiskey. Wandering around the empty venue, he spotted an interesting sight, making him realize Hammer didn't leave with his wife at all.

Mis. Hammer sat on one of the many sofas, head through back as she stared at the ceiling. Her arms rested on the back of the sofa while her legs were spread. If Tony didn't know better, he would have thought the woman was imitating a pimp without all of his whores. She has a half-full glass of wine in one hand, and a cigarette in the other. Next to her left foot was an empty bottle of wine, and a cigarette try next to her hip. If she wasn't sitting in the area made for smoking, he would have had to say something.

The try seemed to have at least five already smoked cigarettes residing in it, another joining them when she finishes the one in her fingers. Her sharp-boned face moves down, dead green eyes locking his brown ones.

“Thought Hammer left a few hours ago,” Tony asked, eyeing the woman in front of him. She just seems to chuckle before leaning back onto the plush surface. She brings the glaze to her lips, takes a long drink, and empties her cup fast.
“He did, took the car too. Thought I would stay a while before walking all the way back to the house.” her mouth let out the words softly, barely audible if you weren't waiting for them. Her lips were stranded a light red from the liquid she had been drinking. Her head falls back as she stares back at the ceiling. “It's only an hour walk, I've been farther.”

He watched the woman roll her arms off the top of the sofa and lean forward. She pushed a hand through her thick, inky black hair, lit it, and pulled her head back up. She leaves her glass on the small table as she stands. As she stood straight up, Tony realized how tall she really was. He was guessing at least six feet. All he knew was that she was taller than him and that he found that fucking hot.

“You can stay at my place if you want. Wouldn't want a gorgeous woman like you getting hurt this late at night.” he let his words fall out of his mouth. How bad could this really be? Tony knew her husband probably was sleeping with a different woman as they spoke, so why would it be terrible if she slept with someone else too?

A small smirk pulled at her lips after he asked that, eyes slowly filling with mischief. She grabbed her purse before looking back at him and putting a hand on his arm. Her smile softened slightly.

“I don't think Justin minds if I stay over,” she whispered in her soft voice. “I don't think I got your name, Justin didn't ask about it,” she asked as he started to move them away from the corner and to the door.

“Tony Stark, the guy that hosted this whole thing,” he smiled back at her. He walked them out the door and to his awaiting car. It started moving as soon as they were inside. Tony rested a hand on her covered thigh. “What's yours?”

“Lucy James-Hammer,” she whispered as she bit his ear. Her hands move quickly to grab him. One rested on his chest while the other happily handed on his crotch. He happily followed her lead, kissing her wine-covered lips. Enjoying the moans that fell out when he pushed his tongue into her mouth. For a woman that was always covered up and hidden from the lights, she did know how to use her tongue.

Chapter Text

{Los Angeles, 1999}

The church was beautiful. Flowers had been placed around the venue and even on the candles. It had been one of her only requests for his ‘big day’. He had wanted them at every one of his weddings, for flowers to be placed wherever he would look. It reminded him of his mother's garden. It reminded him of the times she was calm and without worries.

He had no bride’s maids, he had no family, and he had no friends to help him. The closest he had to any of that was getting ready to say ‘ I do’. Loki was happy all of his family understood she didn't want help from them. It hurt a little bit to see his mother’s disappointed face, but it just felt wrong having another woman helping him get ready.

As he looks into the mirror, he wonders what they would think about the new addition to his wedding dress collection. Richard and Luck probably would have told him he looked gorgeous. Luck would have kissed his cheek and told him not to worry, that he understood him moving on so fast. He can just hear Richerd complaining about him marrying another useless man. He always wanted to make sure he was all right, even before their marriage.

He imagined Ruth giggling and helping him with his hair, pointing out how he grew it out. She would talk about how his new husband had to let them party together because Lucy was great at drinking out at any poor pub that sold their favorite giggle juice. He wished he would see his friend in a bridesmaid's dress, with her blond hair done into a bun. Her shaking up and down with excitement. It was an image he hadn't seen since 1933 in Chicago.

He wished for her mother. He hadn't seen her in a long while, but He just wanted someone from her old family. He wanted her mother to hug him, to tell him that he didn't need to marry another man to live. ‘Maybe this one would be different, just like Luck and Richard’ he would say, even if both of them knew that the man waiting for her wouldn't be as nice as them. He wished for his mother when he was handed a white ballgown-like wedding dress. For his mother to smack it away and tell her soon-to-be-son-in-law. For her to tell him that Loki didn't want to wear such a girly thing. For his mother to tell him that Loki felt like a man and would rather be wearing a suit than that ridiculous dress. For his mother to walk through the door and wrap her arms around him.

His soon-to-be husband’s mother would just call him a woman. She would point out all of his flaws. She didn't understand that Lucy James wasn't a woman all the time, that sometimes he wanted to just be Loki again. She was the one that got the dress for him, the one that had handed it to him.

He tried to hide the tires in his eyes, not wanting to smudge his eyeliner or mascara. He just looked at himself, looked at the woman in the mirror he wished was a man instead. He wanted to cut his hair and take a meat cleaver to his chest. He hated this form now, hated how his soon-to-be husband would touch and fondle it. He wanted to scream. He wanted to let every ounce of his magic leave him and make this place nothing more than the ruble. He wanted to take one of his many daggers and cut the stupid puffy dress into shreds.

With his hands on the vanity, helping him push to stand. His body felt like lead, his legs felt like they would snap under the pressure. With a look back into the mirror, he wished it was 1977 or even 1950. He wished to smile like he did on those days and wished to be excited like he was back then. But when the knock came on the door, he knew he wasn't allowed to do that.

When his mother-in-law saw him, he just thought it was nervousness. She didn't know that this wasn't his first, and probably not the last, wedding. Loki let the woman hook his arm with hers, guiding them to the place he had been dreading the whole day.

Just as expected, flowers were everywhere. Roses, lilies, orchids, and tulips were the reason he smiled. The colors made him remember the field and luck would take care of it. Luck’s favorite flower was Chrysanthemums, that's why they were his bouquet. Maybe it was a mean thing to do, marrying someone else while still grieving for your past lover. Loki didn't care, he didn't love this man, just like he didn't love five of his other husbands.

All of the pews on his side were empty, while Justin's was full. He could hear the whispers of pity, the whispers of wonder on why he had no one. Time like this was when he wished he hadn't been thrown out of his own world, even if that meant dealing with his father’s anger.

As he stared into his husband's eyes, he wished he could be as happy as him. The man could make a smile like it might mean something. Loki put on one too. He let tears fall when Justin started talking and said ‘I do’. Loki said ‘I do’.

The rest of the ceremony was a blur. Loki knew how things like this happened, he would rather not keep memories that meant nothing to him. He tried not to throw up when he kissed him when he put his tongue down Loki’s through in front of his entire family. He tried to forget the feeling of his hands on his body.

He tried to forget the way he felt when they got home. He tried to forget the tires that fell when he snuck into the bathroom after. He tried to forget how he scrubbed his body till the water turned red in the shower.

He tried to forget how he did that every time they did anything in bed.

Chapter Text

{New York, 2006}

There were few things that annoyed Pepper Potts, there were even fewer when it came to her job. She did like her job, but she did have to deal with things she didn't like. For example, men from different companies think she doesn't know anything because she was a woman or the times Tony Stark would sleep with a woman and leave Pepper to deal with the aftermath.

That's what she is doing right now. She had just wanted to meet with Tony because of some paperwork he hadn't finished, but she found out that he had left someone in his bed. She hoped they were not rude like some of the others Tony had brought around, but she honestly couldn’t care. She found it entertaining to be rude right back to them.

She had gotten to his place around 10 am. She had expected the woman to be long gone by then, but walking by Tony’s bedroom proved that wrong. She hadn't been in the best mood when she got there, and most definitely wasn't in the mood to deal with a hook-up. She notified Happy that they would need him to take the woman home after Pepper got her out. She had other things to do than deal with things like this.

She didn't care if she had a pointed look on her face or if her body showed she would rather not be there, she just wanted to tell Tony to finish his damn work on time. As she opened the door, her once tense shoulders and annoyed eyes relaxed a little. She had expected a woman still fast asleep, or for her to be staying over her welcome by taking a long shower. She had expected a rude comment or a glare.

What she got was a woman sitting in Tony’s bed, green eyes raining tears down from her dark green eyes. She was shaking like a leaf. She was naked, her clothes still scattered around the floor. She was slightly hunched over, her hands holding her head. The room was filled with her soft quiet sobs.

The woman’s phone sat on the floor on the other side of the room. From a quick glance, Pepper saw the screen had broken. She looked back at the weeping woman, who had not seemed to notice her just yet.

Pepper moved to pick up the phone, not failing to notice the small bits of glass under it. She heard the crying stop when she stood back up. When she turned her attention back to the woman, she was met with wide puffy eyes. With her face full in view, Pepper could see the mascara running down the woman’s face. How old was she? With all of her makeup melting off from her cries, she looked no older than 25.

“Hello,” the woman’s voice shook out. Her eyes seemed to fill with shame, looking anywhere but the older woman in front of her. “I didn't think anyone was here. Stark had left before I woke up, I thought…” The woman’s lips quivered slightly.

Pepper gave a small smile, moving towards the younger girl. “It’s fine, I just came to tell Tony about something. I heard you and thought I would check in.” she didn't mention the part where she just wanted to kick the girl out only moments ago. She sits down only a bit away from the other girl, placing the phone next to her. She got a nod in return. “May I ask why you were crying?”

The woman turned her face back down to the sheets. “My husband just thought he had to state his opinion on things, even if they were hypocritical.” the woman didn't have much of a voice, small and shaky was all that was left. The woman seems to sob once more, bringing a hand back up to her face. “Norse, how the hell did I end up like this” she mumbled under her breath. A fresh set of tears rolled down her face.

Pepper didn't know what to do, she wasn't prepared for something like this. So she did what she normally would do, pull this stranger into a hug. The poor girl tensed all around when she pulled her close.

“Like, I was a scholar and now I’m crying in a hookup’s bed while being hugged by someone I don't know,” tears rolling down her face. Pepper just tried to calm her, running a hand down her back as the other girl just sobbed. Pepper felt as she slowly broke down more, gasping for air after every sob.

Eventually, the girl let go and leaned back. When the hug broke, Pepper remembered that the girl was still naked. She stood up to grab some of her clothes to hand to her.

“I'm sorry for that.” the woman remarked, whipping her fist with her hand. She grabbed the braw handed to her and put it on.

“It's no problem. You said you were a scholar, may I ask what?” Pepper smiled kindly at her, trying to cheer them up.

“Science mostly, but I loved to understand languages in my free time. I still study different languages when I finish with housework." The woman’s saw was still small. She stood and started to put back on her clothes. It was only then that she realized who the woman was.

“You're Hammer’s wife,” she said as she handed her her shoes.

“Please, Lucy is fine. I don't like to be related to him if I don't have one too,” she mumbled out as she slipped her feet into her black flats.

“What languages do you know?” Pepper handed her her bag, looking the woman in the eyes.

Lucy smiled ever so softly. “I can talk in most languages but can only write in 20.” she moved to take her phone. “I'm still working on writing in English but I've gotten better with it.” She looked back at Pepper. “Would you be able to get a car to take me home?”

Pepper nodded, “of course, Happy should be here to take you.” Pepper guided her to the door and showed her the way to where the car was waiting. Lucy didn't talk for most of the walk, just staring off into space, eyes unfocused like how they were for the gala last night.

She wished the woman goodbye before the car drove away. Lucy was an interesting woman by Pepper’s standards but did seem to know a lot more than what would be assumed. As Pepper walked back into the house to go to Tony, her mind landed on the open translator position in Stark Industries that desperately needed to be filled.

Chapter Text

The drive was mostly uneventful. A nice looking thing, just like the ones Justin has. Loki looks around the vehicle. It's the same as most of the stupid cars rich men like nowadays. They always preferred the cars the Richerd used to have. He used to have a red Chevrolet Bel Air, a beautiful thing that was one of the best of its time. It had so much more than these stupid black cars they always put in.

The driver was quiet, it unnerved them a little. The few times they left the house without Justin, the driver always chatted with them. It reminded them of Asgard, how the guards would just ignore them. The shock of their head left the memories of that wretched place, they wanted to think of the fun cars Richard showed off.

The members of his pressure Chrysler New Yorker, or his Cadillac Eldorado didn't have a ruff, meaning their hair always got messed up after riding in it. How his face would scrunch up when Loki made a comment on how his Lincoln Continental looked funny when the hood was down. How Richard cared for all of the cars more than anything when he found out he was infertile.

How he cared for them more when Loki said he could spend more time with them instead of with them. The times Loki would bring him food after hours of trying to get his WW2 jeep working just like they used to. As he told Loki of what the war was like, about all the people he had lost in the mud. How they would curl up under her arm as they watched the stars in his ford thunderbird, and Richard thinking they were asleep and telling them how he would never want anyone else.

The car stops before their new house. They opened the door before the driver could, getting a small look from him. Their shoes hit the pavement with a small click but were overpowered by the car behind them.

The shrubs in the front garden needed to be cut, and the roses needed to be pruned. No matter how much they loved the chaos the plant brought, Justin didn't appreciate it. He didn't appreciate the chaos they always brought. Always wanted the serpent that came around killed or the few wolves that seemed to get a little too close shot. He didn't like the baked goods that had a little bit of spice in them. He didn't like the little jokes they pulled. All he liked was parties and showing off how amazing he was.

Loki rolled their eyes as they pulled open the large door, moving into the parlor. Clothes and shoes had been through, suit jackets laying on the sofa, and stiletto heels laid on their white carpet, leaving a mud stain that they would have to clean up. With a sigh, they move deeper into their house.

Loki climbed the stairs when they heard it, the loud cracking of their wooden bed. The lights above their head flicker just slightly, and the small candle that had been blown out the day before flickers with a green flame.

“Je vais le tuer,” the teeth grind together as they keep moving up the stairs. Maybe they will move to France after they have gotten better at reading it, or they could move back to London. No, it hadn't been long enough after what they did to number six. What was number six’s name again?

The sounds become more clear as they get closer to the door. The sound of their husband pounding into some other woman. Their whore of a husband messing with someone again. That hypocrite, calling them a slut for wanting to wear something with a little more skin, but he can fuck some girl that is probably a third of his age.

As they turn the corner through the doorway, they lean on the frame. He takes in the scene of their husband being unfaithful. Rolling their eyes when they see the woman was faking pleasure from what they can see. The poor girl who would get something good only got a man that finds it a challenge to get it up in bed. As they look at the girl’s face, trying to figure out if she was a new one or someone they’ve already talked to, the girl screams at realizing they were there. Yeah, the girl was new.

They rolled their eyes as they walked past the bed to grab a better pair of clothes so they could work on the garden surrounding the house. They looked over to see the girl staring at them, worried about flooding her eyes. Justin on the other hand didn't seem to care, just kept going.

“Don't mind me,” was all they said as they walked into the bathroom to change. When they left, the two had separated. The girl was curled up by the headboard, looking scared at them. Justin looked pissed, standing up to talk to them. He grabbed their shirt by the collar and pushed the agent to the wall.

“Get the fuck out,” he gritted through showing teeth. Loki nodded and left the room when they were let go. Their tennis shoes hit the ground softly, moving through the house to get to the back door.

“I was already going to do that, no need to get sore over me,” they mumbled as they put on their work gloves. Their frown moves into a soft smile as they look at the garden they’ve been working on. From flowers to vegetables lived because of their work.

Walking under the flower archway, they take a breath of fresh air. Their only true home in the house. Tying their hair back with a green handkerchief, they step deeper into their little heaven. This was their home, where Justin couldn't put his opinions on every little thing. Where they don't have to be lucky all of the time. Where they can sit in the center of it all, next to their small fire pit with a cauldron hanging over it.

A single chair sat there, next to their little pit or glowing orange fire. The roses were thick, entangled with all different colors that weren’t naturally possible on Earth. How the vines climb everywhere and nowhere at the same time. Where Justin didn't know there was a small family of snakes that his perfect wife took care of. Where his perfect wife can make a bottle of wife appear out of nowhere, a bottle filled with Asgard's finest wine, and drink every drop without company.

They fall back into the single lonely chair, filled with glass in their hands. It was only 12 pm, but the house wouldn't be safe till 5. With the first sip, they can already feel a little bit happier about their situation.

Chapter Text

{New Orleans, 1922}

Soft snow had fallen through the streets of New Orleans. Loki had seemed thicker when Ruth had dragged them to New York last year when they found out they didn't have a family to go home to for the holidays. Ruth’s family was kind but showed little interest in their daughter’s new friend. They showed hostility when Loki admitted that they never celebrated Christmas.

Their small blond friend didn't let that slide, apologizing for her family's behavior and that she didn't asking if they even celebrated the same thing. It warmed Loki's heart to have someone to celebrate Yule with someone that cared. Ruth may know practically nothing about it, but she tried.

She helped Loki find a spruce for a yule tree, helped decorate with first and pin, and even tried to work with simple magic to make little ornaments. She would ask questions whenever she got one and listened when Loki would explain to the best of their abilities.

Of course, they did some of Ruth’s Christmas traditions. It Was decorated with green and red, had a few small Santas around the apartment, and the smell of gingerbread roamed through the whole place. Loki asked a few questions as they didn't fully understand, but Ruth didn't know much about the religious side of the holiday.

“Family, that's what it's always been about. And presents. A lot of people only celebrate as presents.” Ruth explained as she put a few ornaments onto the tree. Loki nodded as they read through a book they had brought from home.

As time went on and Yule got closer, they decided to bake some goods. They decided on doing things they just liked, nothing had to be traditional for their holiday. Ruth had desired gingerbread cookies, while Loki found a recipe for a yule log.

As Loki set up the things they needed, Ruth stormed in with a record player awkwardly held in her arms. Loki quickly moved to grab it and put it in a better place as Ruth ran back into the room she came from. They rolled their eyes as they set it up, looking up when their friend walked back into the room with a few records. She moved to set it up, and soon Fanny Brice was playing through the room.

She turned back to her friend, looking at all of the ingredients they had. “Is spice traditional or have you gone to the nut house?” she giggled as she skipped over to the woman with far too many peppers.

“I lost all my senses a long time ago,” Loki smirked as they started chopping what they needed. Ruth got to work measuring her ingredients, making sure not to mix them with the hot stuff Loki was messing with.

By the end of the night, the cookies had been backed and all had been frosted. The log was ready to burn anyone with a low spice tolatence’s mouth in a single bit. Both of the women were laughing and joking as they got ready for bed. With a soft thud, they fell into their slightly too-small-for-two-people bed. Loki fell asleep content and happy.

Chapter Text

{New York, 2007}

The bite of pepper as she stood in front of the hammer house. It was early in January, only a week into the new year. A large wave of snow had fallen over New York a few days before, leaving the state in a white wonderland. It also made it colder than it normally would be this time of year.

Pepper had worn a new winter jacket she had got herself for Christmas. She pulled it closer to herself as she moved through the snow to the house. The driveway and walkway had been shoveled, making it easier to walk.

She looked at the door to the house. It was big, but the house was bigger. Three floors with a large field on either side. Pepper guessed they had at least an acre of land if not more. Pepper had seen photos of the sprawling garden in all of its seasons. From what she has heard, they keep the main garden in the backyard so it wouldn't die out in the winter. Though, in the spring or summer it was the most beautiful thing one can see.

Pepper wasn't here for that thought, she could always come in the summer then the hammers allowed people to roam their Garden-of-Eden-like property. She was there to talk to Miss. Hammer herself. Something about the woman didn't sit right with Pepper. It could have been the fact that she broke down crying because of her husband, or the fact she said she didn't want to be put near him if she didn't have to.

Either way, she wanted to see the woman again. The thought of leaving a woman that looked barely enough to drink with a man, whom she later found out though Tony had left her to walk an hour home, didn't sit right with her. Did she question Tony's honesty about how he got Lucy into his bed? Yes, but she could tell he wasn't lying about her being left.

She had gotten a sympathetic look from Tony when she told him about what scene she had walked into with Lucy. He said that if Pepper ever saw her again, buy her something nice for her and he’ll pay her back. She had looked up some stuff about Lucy beforehand, and got her some green roses, as they were a regular flower in the picture of her garden. They weren't cheap but they weren't expensive either.

She knocked on the door, admiring the bits of gold hanging around the door. She looked at the Christmas reef that sat on the door as well. She didn't hear any movement, so she knocked again.

Then the door finally opened, and she was met by Lucy Hammer herself. She had on a plain green shirt under black overalls. Her hair was pulled behind a green bandana, showing off her pearl earrings. Her feet were covered in old leather boots that looked decades old. With the woman standing in front of her, Pepper realized just how telling the woman was.

“Hello, what can I do for you?” her soft voice contrasted with the hardened look on her face. Her stance was tight and her fingers held onto the door with an iron grip. She had an expressionless look, but her eyes soon locked on the flowers in Pepper’s hands. “If you're looking for Justin, he won't be back till nightfall.”

“I'm not here for your husband, I wanted to talk with you,” Pepper said calmly. She caught a surprised looking into the other woman’s eyes for a second before they went back to their emotionless state. She nodded and moved out of the doorway to let her in.

Pepper followed as Miss. Hammer walked deeper into the house, closing the door behind her. The house had a few Christmas decorations but mostly was just bland. It had no life as if no one had lived there. The few signs were pictures of the couple or a book left on a random table.

When they entered the kitchen, it was a different story. It was bright white and gray, but it looked like someone had used it. Many spices and herbs sat on the granite countertop, and a basket sat on the island in the center of the room filled with many different peppers and vegetables. The window sill that looked out over the garden had fresh herbs being grown. It was a calm environment, it looked like a living room.

“The flowers are for you,” Pepper said as the woman went to put away some of the vegetables. Miss. Hammer turned and Pepper could see the surprise in her face. “They're a gift from Mr. Stark, to apologize for the bad time you had at the galla and the little after-party.'' Pepper tried not to smirk when she saw a blush form on the other’s cheeks.

She grabbed the flowers. “Tell him it's all right. It isn't at fault for my husband’s actions.'' She prepared a vase before putting the flowers in it. It added more color to the room when she placed them in the center of the island. She smiled ever so softly as she fixed a few of the flowers. “So, why have you come to talk with me?” she goes back to putting things away.

Pepper took a set at one of the stools at the island, “I wanted to make sure you were ok.'' She watched as the others pulled out some things. Boils and ingredients are placed onto the island.”How have you been doing?” she asks

Miss. Hammer pulls out a cutting board before starting to cut a few peppers. Pepper didn't know much about them, just that they looked like the spicy kind. “I've been better,” she says as she cuts. “However, I've been worse.” pepper nodes at that. She just kept working as Pepper watched. She just realized there was a book sitting near where she was working. It looked old, older than Pepper herself. The paper was yellow and the cover looked like it was made of leather.

“What do you do for Stark exactly?” Miss. Hammer asked, looking up from her cutting. She kept working after she asked. Soon she started putting wet ingredients into a bowl, before starting to measure other things.

“I'm his private assistant at the moment.” she smiled softly at the other woman. “I make sure he does what he needs to do and do other tasks for him.”

“Sounds fun,” the other mumbled as they started to mix all of the dry ingredients into the wet ones. “What is your name? I don't think I have ever gotten it.”

“Virgina Potts, but Stark calls me Pepper” She watched as the other woman worked. They fell into a quiet presence. Pepper didn't know what to do but watch, and the other woman wasn't talking. “You mentioned that you study languages, which ones do you work with?”

Miss. Hammer started to work on scooping what Pepper assumed was cookie dough. “As I said before, I can speak and understand most when spoken; however, I can only write in fifteen, but I am working on understanding more.'' She starts to place what she thinks are jalapenos onto the top of each cookie directly in the center, moving them over and over if they're not right.

“That's quite interesting,” the other woman moved to put the tray into the oven, kicking it shut with her feet. As she goes to wash her hands from the excess of hot peppers, Pepper says, “Stark Industries have been looking for a translator. It would be useful to have someone who understands a lot working for the company.”

She poses for a minute before turning around to the other woman. “What would the hours be, and would I be able to work from home some days?” her voice dropped as if someone was listening to that shouldn't know about it. The woman’s emerald eyes looked at Pepper directly and could concentrate.

“It would be a normal nine to five, but I could work things out for you to do things at home if needed. The problem is that there will be times you will leave the country for business trips if a translator is needed. Would you be able to do that?” Pepper didn't mean to look around the room, but the other woman understood what she meant.

“I could work it out.” She walked around the island and sat next to Pepper. “He doesn't need to know”.

Chapter Text

{New York, 2007}

Justin wasn't the most observant person when it came to his wife, especially when he had someone else to focus on. No matter what Loki did, unless it wasn't to Justin's standards of ‘lady-like’, he didn't really care about what his wife did. The list of unladylike is a whole range of things. Fighting, talking unless told to, being without your husband, divorce, and the one that pissed Loki the most, working was something women shouldn’t do if they wanted a husband.

Loki had laughed it off the first time he heard him say that, but the more he would shut Loki down about getting a job, the angrier he got. Around the third-year mark, Loki just gave up. He put all of his energy that wasn't put into cleaning and making food Justin would bitch about, was put into his garden.

The deeper into the marriage they got, Loki made less effort in spending time with his husband, and Justin stopped being close to his wife unless when the media was involved. Loki didn't mind that, it made it easier to do what they wanted without care. Justin isn't someone Loki would call a workaholic, but he did spend most of his time out of the house most weekdays. When he was home, Loki made it clear that he didn't want to see him unless he needed to.

These things combined together made it fairly easy to go under Justin's nose. Taking all of the time Justin was home and the housework they needed to get done, Loki could make certain hours around them to work.

The only annoying thing was when Justin made the smart decision to stay home and Loki had to sneak through the garden to get to the place where a driver could pick them up. Or the times Justin would wander into Loki’s kitchen without warning and start questioning the translation work sprawled over the island. Loki lied most of the time, but no matter how smart Justin thought he was, Loki was smarter than he gave him credit for.

Today was the day Justin made the smart destination that he would rather be home than fucking his receptionist. So here Loki was, getting dressed on the edge of the garden, in the middle of a frost-bitten march. Cold weather never affected Loki, being frost giant and all, it just meant he had to put more magic into not turning blue.

He had to wear female skin like he always does, but he could at least wear something more masculine. He had made a green women’s suit. The pants were bell bottom-like, and the top pulled a little at his natural hips. He put his hair into a bun, and put on some dark makeup. It had been a while since he got to pick out his clothes without restrictions from his husband.

He sat in his lone chair to pull on his heels when his phone pings. He wasn't happy when he saw Justin texting him. Something about having dinner done for guests that were coming over later or something, Loki didn't care. With a quick snap of his fingers, they were in an alleyway away from the house.

In a few minutes the driver, whose name he learned was Happy, pulled up in front of him to take in to work. He greeted him with a smile and a small hello. They didn't talk most of the time. Loki tended to just work on certain things that he could at the time, ignoring the long texts Justin was texting him.

It was around twelve in the afternoon when he finally got to the office he worked at. Everyone around him was either on their lunch break or about to go on theirs. Loki always got a few glares from people that thought he was getting special treatment or thought he was always late. When he got to his office, he started to file his work and sent things to the right places. Loki spent a good amount of time in the office running around to get the right papers to the right places.

Around two was when Loki would eat his lunch as they watched some of the overseas stuff he has to take notes on later. Today Loki had a mix of berries he had grown in their garden. Loki ignored the constant binding of his phone from Justin, he knew it was his normal complaining about the same certain things. If Loki was having a lucky day, Virgina would have time and eat lunch with him. They would chat about different events happening around the world.

After lunch was just more work and getting new things to translate. On a slow day, they will leave with one or two things to work on. On a fast day, he may have to translate ten to twenty different papers or reports in several different languages overnight. It was tiring sometimes, but it was nice to be doing something productive after so long.

They would leave around five through the driver, getting out a few miles away. When he couldn't see the car anymore, with a snap of his fingers, he would be back in the garden. He would leave all of his work in the shed, only getting it out till the sun had gone down. On a bad day, he would stay up until the sun came through the sky.

It was a lot, and it drained him far more than anyone would understand, but he had money. The salary was worked out to seventy-five thousand dollars for a year of work. He even got overtime when he could stay later in his office.

He didn't mind that people would glare at him for coming late or leaving early. He didn't care about the time certain people would speak rudely about him in a different language without releasing him as the translator. He tried not to mind the small threats Justin would think his way when he didn't come to him when he called but was too lazy to go out to the garden and see his perfect wife wasn't even home.

What did scare him was what Justin found out. The thought of him realizing Loki wasn't at home. That he had broken one of Justin's many rules. Loki had nightmares about what Justin would do. He had already threatened to kick Loki out of the house if he even thought of a job. There were the nightmares of Justin harming all of the plains Loki cares for. Justin couldn't truly harm Loki, but in his nightmares, he could. So Loki lied more than ever.

Lying about what he does in the garden to all of the work on the island. Lying that he wasn't tired, that he just couldn't sleep instead of doing more work till Justin woke up. Lying about the constant calls from Virginia about things that had been changed or moved.

He made sure to make it up to Justin. Even if he wanted to throw up or cry, he let Justin do what he wanted to his body. If he thought it was some ‘woman hormones’, it would keep him out of Loki's hair. No matter how much he wanted to close his jaw hard onto his dick, no matter how much skin he washed down the drain, he needed this job but they didn't have the money for a place of his own.

Loki will never admit to having a problem with alcohol to anyone, but it had increased more than before. A simple glass turned into several bottles after some ‘fun’ with his husband. Lunch brakes turned into smocking brakes. A smoke from every blue moon in the garden turned into buying a new box every day. The gas station by his office became friendly with him, soon learning his name and chatting every time he came in for a new box.

Loki had not smoked like this since the night of December 1960. When he had to watch his loving husband, the only one that seemed to care, slipped through his fingers. He couldn't help but smoke a whole box on the roof of the hospital. It was supposed to be a fun night in his car. The night shouldn't have ended with sorrow.

Loki hadn't drunk that much liquor since 1989 when the cancer treatment didn't work. When he lets another person leave him. He had sat in their house with a bottle of vodka, he hated vodka and just drank. He woke up in the morning with wound twenty bottles surrounding the.

He knew it wasn't good, that it would hurt him later in his long life, but it gave him a little getaway from the world around him. He could just sit on his lone chair, with a bottle of the strongest Asgardian liquor. He could just put the bottle to his lips without worry. It wasn't like Justin would come out to find him. He would have happily taken him, even if Loki couldn't stand on his feet. It would be the first time he woke up naked in their bed.

---------------

“Are you doing ok?” Virgina asked. She had come over after she found Loki passed out at his desk. He didn't mean to, he just hadn't been able to sleep. From work to sleeping with his husband to drinking in his garden, rest had been impossible. Virgina was the one that drove them home that day, saying that she wanted to make sure they got some food and rest.

They sat in the spare bedroom. Justin was out on a trip so Loki didn't have to keep up with his ‘perfect wife’ and could have his friend over without backlash. Loki had to admit, they didn't look that great. He had not smoked for a good few hours and hadn't drank for longer. The withdrawal was starting to hit. The headache and the pain made him wonder how he quit the first time.

“I'm fine,” he pushed out, voice soft and trembling. He hated it, feeling weak like this. As much as he trusted the woman, he didn't trust her as she did with Ruth.

“You sure? You look like you've seen death,” she said as she got up. “I'll get you a glass of water.” She disappeared through the door, leaving Loki alone in the spare room. Just sitting there, his body itched for a drink. He wanted that relief he knew he would get, but he couldn't do that when someone was around. He couldn't sneak into the garden for a few cigarettes, leaving his mouth dry.

He thanked the strawberry blond when she came back with a glass of water. They started to chat about their normal things. Loki would joke about things going on in the media, or poke fun at something Virgina did. They both laughed and joked till the woman’s phone went off. Loki stayed silent as she talked.

“Ok, I'll tell her.” She hangs up and looks back to Loki. “So apparently there is a meeting in Japan that has just been confirmed. It would be a three-day thing.”

“Yeah, I've heard about it. I was the one translating the back and forth.” Loki smirks.

She chuckled. “Well, you would have to go. It's a paid trip, meals, hotel, and transportation are included. If you wanted to buy things, you would pay. There would be certain events you would attend, but there is time for you to do what you want.” she explained. She eyed him worriedly, “Are you sure you're ok to go?”

Loki would have rolled his eyes if he had the energy. “I'm fine,” he smiled softly. “Who would I be going with?”

“Tony Stark, you will spend most of the time at events with him.” Loki nodded when a new wave of pain hit his head. Virgina sat up to help him when he rolled over in pain. “Look, if you're not doing good…” she trailed off.

“I'll be fine. Plus, I've always wanted to go to Japan.” he smiled at his friend, trying to calm her down. They went back to chatting about a few things. It slowly dissolved into talking about dinner, and if she wanted to stay.

They ended up making some quick homemade pasta Loki frozen earlier that week. Virgina slept in the other spare room while Loki stayed in the spare room, because why couldn't you have more than one? It had been one of the first good nights of sleep he had had since the end of January, and it was May.

Chapter Text

{Chicago, 1977}

Loki had to get used to the new Chicago. The last time they lived in Chicago was in the 1930s. The city may have lost population through the years, but it was much different from the Chicago they had married their second husband. Crime had grown in their time away, same with the weather.

Don't get them wrong, they liked Chicago, it was just a little weird to come back to something new. Even after leaving there for seven years, it was still a little hard to believe. They weren't scared about getting jumped, they could take care of themselves. Luck always joked that they were marrying a secret assassin, using Loki's dagger collection as proof.

Today was a good day. After a few years of hell, they had something calm again. They didn't have to worry about the dead body they left in London. They didn't have to worry about some government again knocking at their door about how they did not age. They didn't have to be in hiding.

They watched as Luck struggled to hang his plants in their new apartment. They giggle when a little bit of dirt falls right onto his head. The room was painted a soft yellow, with walls lined with bookshelves. Luck's plants in every inch of the apartment. Loki didn't mind snapping their fingers to help.

A small ribbon of green magic moves the pot out of his hands and into place. His fluffy brown hair bounces as he snaps his head toward them, a grin plastered on his face. Loki tried to hide their face behind their hand, cigarette still between their fingers.

They start to laugh when Luck presses small kisses on their face. He grabs the cigarette before putting it out. Maybe the walls weren't yellow because it made them happy, maybe there were other reasons why he thought yellow walls would be better.

Chapter Text

{New York, 2007}

Business trips were not new. He was the head of a company, he's been on many. He had his own jets and houses around the world so that no matter where he went, he would have fun. Normally Tony would go alone and to an area with mostly English-speaking people. Today was not normal.

It had started off normal. Tony had gotten a call about an event that had been planned that needed him to attend. He had shrugged it off, saying he could just get more information the day of. He showed no mind to it all, thinking it would be like every other surprise event.

When he got out of his car at the airport that held one of his jets, he saw Pepper waiting outside. He shrugged it off, she was the one going to give him the information before he left. Worry was written on her face as she looked down at her watch.

“Thought I wouldn't show up?” he joked as he walked up to her. He had nothing in his hands, he didn't need to. All of his stuff was already put in its place. Plus, it was late. He didn't even bother putting on real clothes, he was just going to fall asleep when the plane took off. He had on pajama pants and a worn AC/DC shirt, while his feet were covered in old slippers. Pepper didn't seem surprised at his clothes, just shook her head.

“I knew you would, even if it was two hours late.” she groaned as she rubbed a hand over her face. “You are going to Japan, with a translator.” he ignored her eyes that rolled over his body, and the questioning look she got.

“No, I didn't know I would be sharing a plane with someone.” he kept a calm face, even if he was making fun of himself about it.

“Just wanted to know if this was an intentional thing or not,” she smirked as she turned to the plain. She starts to climb the stairs, “It's a three-day trip. You will land in Tokyo where a promising company will meet with you. You will go with them to a meeting, then have a few larger-scale meetings with other people. By the end of the day, you will go back to a hotel with a higher driver." Tony followed her up, nodding at the information. He hoped it was written down somewhere.

“There will be a few more meetings and public interviews on the second and third day, but there will be a bit more downtime.” she turned around to look him in the eye, “So get some of your work done”

“Got it” he nodded again, only half paying attention. They finally walk into the real part of the plain. It was his nice one, with large lavish seats and a bar at one end of the walkway. He had it made to look like a small club when he added the lights and wanted to have run. Tony thought he would have that today, but that had been shot out of the sky.

He started to pay attention again when he saw the woman seated on one of the couches. She wears more casual clothes but is still professional. Her long hair was pulled back into a ponytail, held by a dark green scrunchy. She had a few papers out from her bag, right next to her laptop. It wasn't any translator though, it was the one that was higher a few months ago. Lucy fucking James-Hammer. His breath stopped a little when she looked over at the two of them.

“I know you two already met, but this will be your translator,” Pepper seemed to glare at him slightly. She pulled him away a bit before speaking lower. “Be nice to her. Something is going on and she’s not doing so well.”

“Got it,” he nodded before walking over to the other woman. He saw Pepper leave the plane when he sat down. He was a bit away from her, just enough to get a look at what she was doing. Lucy seemed to pay him no mind and just kept typing and writing. He was surprised when she pulled out a flask to take a drink of whatever it held.

He may not know her well, but he could tell something was up. Her emerald eyes had a lost look within them. Her hands shook slightly as she moved around her seat. As someone who had a terrible time sleeping, he could tell when someone hasn't slept in a while.

Whatever was in the flask seemed to never end as she just kept taking sips from it. Tony eventually got up to grab himself a drink, just a glass of whisky on ice. He looked over his shoulder slightly to see a pair of green eyes snap down back to her laptop.

“Want something to drink?” he asked. He was used to people staring at him, even if it was from his own staff.

“You got Spirytus?” she looked up slightly, not giving him her full attention. He tried to not let the surprise show on his face at the question. Spirytus was known for being a really strong liquor. Even he didn't drink it often, he drank a lot. He looked back at the bar, seeing a bottle.

“Want anything in it?” he also didn't expect her to shake her head no when he asked. He shrugged and poured her a glass of his strangest liquor. If she got drunk, at least they had a few hours to sober her up. When he handed it to her, she didn't waste any time drinking it, only drops were left. She wasn't even fazed by it.

He tried to give her no mind as she did to him. He was exhausted from waking up so early, making it easier for him to fall asleep. Tony had to admit, the tapping of Lucy’s computer was kinda calming to him. He had pulled out the pull-out bed from one of the couches he had intended. It was one of the more comfortable ones and cost a ridiculous amount but it was worth every cent.

He turned his head over to the working woman, still drinking from the flask that never seemed to end. He hadn't realized it till laying down. She had a lollipop in her mouth, and from the small pile of white sticks forming, it wasn't her first. He cringed when she bit down and destroyed it with ease, pulling out a new one from her bed to replace the destroyed one.

Even with all the small noises she was making, they all had a rhythm to it all. It was somehow calming, making it easier to sleep. He didn't know how, but he fell asleep much easier than he had been in a while.

-----

When he started to open his eyes again, the whole plain was dark. He took a quick glance at his watch, telling him he was out for around five hours. Stretching his arms over his head, he let his eyes wander around the cabin.

His eyes landed on Lucy, who had laid back on the couch behind her. Her head lolled back at an awkward angle, arms crossed in front of her. He saw her ink-black hair was slightly wet, still slightly dripping. She must have used the bathroom on the plane with the shower. As her hair dried, it turned into a curly mess.

Tony chuckled at her polka-dot pajamas. They had fringe at the color and were dark green with black dots. It covered most of her body but definitely not made for someone as tall as her. The new fabric had been sewn on to cover the parts of her wrists and ankles that it wouldn't cover. With all of that, the clothes looked well-loved.

Tony got up to take his own shower. It was a quick one, and he just put back on his clothes when done. When he walked back into the main cabin, Lucy was awake and sucking on a lollipop again. What caught his attention with the binding of her phone. Every few seconds it would chim out another note. She leaned forward with her head in her hands.

“Je veux me suicider” (I'm going to kill myself) she mumbled under her breath. Tony knew he walked in on something he shouldn't have. The phone just kept ringing and beeping. Eventually, Tony walked over to the woman and saw who was calling.

“Is something going on with you two?” he looked over at her. He got a small nod before she looked up at him.

“Il me mettra dehors s'il sait que je suis ici,” (he will kick me out if he knows im here) she whispered. His eyes go wide when he is locked with hers. Puffy and red surrounded the brilliant green shad. He may not know what she was saying, but he knew Hammer did something. He just watched the woman shack softly as her husband tried to call again.

“I don't know whatever language you're speaking,” he looked away from the woman, seeing in the corner of his eyes that she looked away from him. His hand went to the back of his neck, only adding to his awkward stance.

“ce n'est pas comme si vous vous en souciez” (not like you would care) she whispered as she stood up. She snatched her phone before walking back to the bathroom. Tony felt a little bad as he watched her walk away, but he didn't really know what to do. He was never good at helping in these situations.

With a sigh, he fell back onto the pull-out bed and just started to watch things on his phone. He didn't have much to do, and he didn't feel like doing anything, just relaxing. Around two hours later, Lucy walked out of the bathroom and sat where she was before. She started to drink from her flask again, making Tony wonder how it still has anything in it.

He started to track time till the sun started to rise. Lucy had started working again and ignored Tony once more. He didn't mind, just got up and changed into more professional clothes. When he came out, the cabin had been lit back up with light. He got to see Lucy's hair fully then. It was curly and messy. It was slightly tamed by the green scrunchy pulling it out of her face. She must straighten it.

A few moments later she went to get changed and get ready. Tony took the time to finally look over the schedule for meetings and conferences. Mostly just boring stuff for the first day, but with people that barely spoke his only language. That meant he would just have to trust Lucy on whatever they said.

Lucy came out in a green suit. Her hair had been straightened and fell around her face. She wore her normal high heel shoes. What surprised him was the dark-looking makeup on her face. It didn't hide how tired she looked, but it did make her eyes look even more vibrant.

It was thirty minutes later when they finally landed. When the plane was on the ground, they both climbed down the stairs while cameras flashed and people waited at the bottom. He went first, Lucy a few steps behind him.

They went through the greetings, Lucy translating the back and forth. She just kept talking, her voice getting louder when speaking Japanese while still being quiet when speaking English. It didn't take long for everyone to start moving through the airport and going to where the first meeting would take place.

Tony was taken aback at how fast Lucy could translate. He had heard people talking about her quick translation work, getting several pages done in only a few hours. She just kept translating what people around them were saying, and translating when he wanted to say anything. When some people talked over her when speaking, she would push through and say what Tony needed in a language he couldn't understand. She never did that in English.

He ‘talked’ to many different people, hoping Lucy remembered all their names because he knew he wouldn't. He wondered how many of his comments were changed because she didn't like them, or she thought they were inappropriate. Either way, they all seem to love him.

At the conference, he got to speak for himself for the most part. There were a few times someone asked a question in Japanese that Lucy would have to translate, or someone asked for his answer in Japanese. It was a serious thing, but he was able to joke a bit.

They had lunch a little after that, just some fast food before going to a different meeting with more people. It was the same type of thing as the other. He would tell Lucy what to say and she would say it. She would translate for him when people talked.

It all ended around seven at night. They loaded into the car that had been provided. It wasn't a big car, but enough room for the two of them. Lucy’s bag sat in between them, making it easier to look into when she went to take something out. He saw an entire bag of lollipops next to her wallet. She had pulled out her flask to drink out of it again. She must have seen him look because she pulled out the bag of lollipops.

“Want one?” she asked as she grabbed one for herself. He shrugged before grabbing one as well. They were so sweet that it hurt his teeth. He tried to bite it like Lucy did, but he felt like he would break a tooth. He watched in awe as she could just chew done without a problem. She chuckled when he tried again, hissing in pain when it didn't go his way.

When they had gotten to the hotel, Lucy left for her room and he went to his. He changed into something more comfortable before ordering room service. He stayed up for most of the night with television and worked on small projects he brought with him. He fell asleep in the middle of writing something down.

-----

He woke up when he heard banging at his door. “Stark, get your ass up. We have to be in the car in ten minutes if we want to be on time.” he heard Lucy yell through the wood. He rolled out of bed and opened the door. He didn't even realize he was just in his underwear.

“It's normal for me to be late,” he replied to the woman who was already dressed.

“It's disrespectful and not the image needed for your company.” she bit back, sharp eyes glaring straight down at him. He sometimes forgets just how tall that woman is and the knife-like eyes don't help. He just nodded and just as he was closing the door, she stopped it. “Do you want coffee?”

He looked back at the emotionless woman. “Black and…” he mumbled as he turned around and handed her his card. “Get yourself whatever.” he yond before closing the door for good. He heard her heels click as she walked away.

He didn't rush to get ready, just taking his time to put on his clothes. By the time he was getting his tie on, someone knocked on the door. Well, it sounded like someone kicked the door a few times. When he opened the door, he saw Lucy holding two coffee cups.

He grabbed his sunglasses and coffee before starting to walk out of the door. Lucy followed, pulling out her flask and pouring some into the cup.

“What's even in that,” he asked.

“The coffee or the flask?”

“Both?”

“Three shots of espresso mixed with hot chocolate with a chocolate shot for coffee. The flask has vodka,” she said as she put it back into her bag before drinking her coffee. He nodded as they got into the elevator.

When different people get in with them, Lucy chats softly with them. She laughs at something they say before making a remark that makes the other people laugh. They got off on the ground floor and into the car waiting for them. They got there thirty minutes before they had to.

“‘We have to leave soon, or we will be late, my ass.' ' he mumbled as they walked into the building.

“It's professional to show up early,” she said as they walked through the halls of meeting rooms.

“I can see why Hammer doesn't like to bring you places, Miss. Professional” he chuckles at his own joke. Lucy stopped and turned to him. Her face showed no emotion but he could tell she wanted to do something to him from the flames in her eyes.

“Someone has to make sure you kids do something other than fuck random woman for fun,” she said through her teeth. One of her hands gripped her bag, while the other was balled up. Then she turned and started walking once more, ignoring him till they sat down in their meeting room.

Tony could feel the tension he had created, but he didn't know how to change it. By the time the meeting was over, Lucy seemed to have calmed down a bit. She stood up and looked over at him. She handed him his card after. He was confused till he remembered giving it to her in the first place.

The day went on, a few more meetings and a lunch later, they were done for the day. He had wanted to do something in the city, but it's not like he could go anywhere without luck to translate. He didn't feel like asking her to do stuff with him, not after the comment he made earlier that morning.

So he stayed in the hotel. He worked on some stuff and took a shower. He tried out the hot tube on the balcony that was included in the room. As he sat in it, he just calmed down and relaxed. He just let his mind wander as he closed his eyes. He thought about what had happened throughout the day. He thought about Lucy for a bit.

He knew something was going on with the hammer and he just had to make some shitty comment. He meant it to be funny, but she seemed like she wanted to kill him afterward. He thought about the alcohol she always drank from her flask and the lollipops she chews on. He can help his mind wander the night of fun they had, even if he knew she was married. She was nice to him, and he just had to do something mean right back. He really should do something to make up for that.

As the night went on, he got a sleeper. He fell asleep on his bed, still a little wet from the hot tub.

------

Tony woke up on time the next morning. He got ready and headed to Lucy's room. He knocked on the door and waited till she opened it. She wore a pink complementary robe given by the hotel. Her hair was messy and curly once again. It was barely close, showing off a little too much of her green underwear. She had a poke-dot sleeping mask on the upper part of her head.

“You didn't see they canceled the meeting,” she mumbled. She rubbed her eyes as she yawned again. Tony was happy he had his sunglasses on, he just let his eyes wander over her.

“Well, maybe we should do something then? You know, seize the day or whatever,” she asked, looking back at her eyes. She rolled her eyes and looked like she was going to reject it until her phone went off again.

“If you pay for most of it, I'm in,” she said with a strong tone, eyes locked with his. She closed the door. He stood there for a moment, surprised when she opened it, completely ready. Looking down at his watch it showed only five minutes had passed. He just nodded and walked away, Lucy following after.

When they got into the elevator again, he looked over at the tall woman beside him. She had on a green, hourglass dress that looked like something from the 50s. It was a simple thing, the only eye-catching thing was the snake that laced the bottom, it looked like it was hand embroidered. He saw a small little 1950s car sewn on top of it, a small four-leaf clover next to it. They all looked out of place on the fabric, but they all looked made with skill.

Her normally straightened hair had more produced curls. Lucy had kept with the dark makeup. Black lipstick and dark green eyeshadow. She had on her black heels like normal, making her even taller. He was barely over her shoulder but he didn't care. It gave him a really good view.

When they started to walk again, he started to follow her. He couldn’t read any of the Japanese around them, only understanding the small bits of English put around for the American tourists.

“I heard of a good breakfast place around here,” Lucy had said, “Terasaka had suggested it.” she looked down at her phone as she tried to find directions.

“Who?” Tony stared at the buildings around them, watching different people go by.

“The nice lady that worked in Chemical engineering who asked about your missiles,” she said before walking away, Tony was quick to follow. He was starting to get used to running after her as she never said anything before walking away from him.

In a few minutes, they were sitting in a small restaurant. Tony looked down at the menu as Lucy read it out to him. He tried to keep his eyes from wandering to her cleavage, as he really needed to know what he wanted to eat. Soon they both ordered, Lucy got miso shiru, while Tony got Yakizakana.

She got a laugh at him trying to figure out chopsticks, and he learned all the wrong ways to use them. When she had finished her soup and he finished his fish, they left to explore the city. They just wandered around and chatted. They stopped at what felt like every other shop. Tony tried to ignore how Lucy would look at things but didn't buy a single thing. Being married to a billionaire, she really didn't buy anything.

Eventually, he broke and bought her some small things. Buy small things he means a few books, some small snacks, and a small little cloth doll. He didn't know why, she just kept looking at different ones, picking on a small black-haired one before sighing and putting it down. When he asked why she didn't buy it, all he got was a small ‘I need to save money’ before she walked off.

Lunch came and went, they chatted about different things, Lucy reading things to him when he needed it. Eventually, the sun was going down and stores started to close. Tony had suggested going to the bar and ordering a few drinks. She had agreed and found them a place.

Time passed fast. Tony didn't even realize the bar was closing till someone had to tell him. He looked at a very drunk Lucy for a translation, getting a slurred response. Normally he would have made a comment about being a lightweight, but she was far from that. She probably had several bottles with little effect. She could have drunk the place empty if he didn't stop her. Sure, Tony was slightly buzzed, but Lucy needed him to keep her standing up.

The trains had stopped, meaning they had to walk all the way back to the hotel. He had very little clue about getting back, as he couldn't read signs or ask people for directions. Lucy was little help, and with her stupid chatter, it was starting to get on his nerves.

What should have been a twenty-minute walk turned into an hour. When they finally got back to their hotel, Lucy was no less drunk. She had turned into kissing Tony softly on his neck. If she wasn't wasted, he would have guided her to his room. Though he will admit to kissing her back in the elevator. As he walked her over to her room, she started to get more into his space.

“I'm not doing any of that, not when you've had one too many,” he commented as he grabbed her purse, trying to find her key card. All he got was an annoyed huff in response. “Just get a drink and go to bed. We have a plane ride in the morning.”

“Don't act like you wouldn't like it,” she whispered softly, nipping at his earlobe.

He kept searching, “Maybe if you weren't drunk.”

“Don't act all rictus, you rich guys are all the same in the end,” that got him to stop. He looked over at the tall woman who was leaning against him.

“I would never do that,” he said sternly.

She rolled her eyes, snatching her bag from him. “Sure, just like you wouldn't send missiles to an organization that killed your own people.” she gridded out, as she swiped the card. “You're nothing more than a playboy, don't act like you care.” and with that, a door was slammed into his face.

Tony just stood there. What did she mean his missiles were going to an organization to kill ‘his people’? Why would she snap at him for not sleeping with a person that couldn't consent? His brows knitted together as he turned to go back to his room. He was far too tired for this shit.

Chapter Text

“Do you ever wonder if the atomic bomb was never dropped, the war would have still continued?” Loki sat in their husband’s workshop. Needle and thread in their hand, trying desperately to recreate their husband’s lovely car onto their favorite dress. Said husband was under one of his many winning cars, working on something new.

“Still up for debate love. It was only used to stop the Japs, not the Germans. Most of Europe was already out of the fight.” his English accent chimed in. He pulled out from under the car, looking back at his wife. As he wiped the sweat from his forehead, spreading oil there instead.

Loki giggled before getting up and taking a rage to clean it off. They kissed the top of Richard’s head before backing away. He pulled them down onto his lap. He ruled his finger through their short curly hair before kissing her black lips.

“Some say that it was the only way from killing far too many more Americans, while others say it was a monster in disguise. Some think the ones who created it were murderers, while others think of them as heroes. I think the poor bastards didn't know what they were making at the time. They didn't know it could get into the wrong hands later.”

She nodded as she leaned against the other man. “Sometimes I think you mortals just love to play god. I would be surprised if you blow up your own planet one day.”

Chapter Text

{New York, 2007}

They weren't that proud of how they acted. Loki knew they had said something stupid, said something they shouldn't have, but they had loose lips when drunk. So here they were, wondering how exactly Tony would act the morning after.

Loki had decided to not remember and avoid him if he could. Did they believe what they said? Yea, who wouldn't when they knew what they did? You learn a lot of information you shouldn't just because you have to translate it.

One of those things is the missiles and weapons that were given to the Ten Rings. They knew it was an under the table type of deal, but it still was fucked up in their eyes. They knew they weren't allowed to talk about the stuff they read in the exchanges between people. They knew the glares that held threats of violence.

That doesn't mean they liked doing it, far from it. They presented every moment of it. They hated that they knew how to read Arabic. Hated when they looked up the guy's name the first time after translating once and wanting to email back saying to just fuck off.

But that wasn't their job, so they did their job. They translated and pretended that they didn't know anything about it later. Ignore the feeling of their stomach turning inside out as they see the things going on in Afghanistan. Roll their eyes and change the channel knowing full well they helped with it all.

No matter how hard they played it, they were still at fault for some of it. They had enough work to occupy them, to help them ignore all of the guilt that can't eat away at them.

So they did what they do best, overwork themselves with whatever they had. On the whole ride home, they work. They try to ignore the fear of going home to the hell that sat waiting for them.

Apparently, Justin had come home early to him, his wife long gone. He had found some of the papers she left and was pissed. They knew what would come, but if they worked a bit harder, maybe they wouldn't have to think about it till the plane landed.

Their mind rang with the last conversation they had. The threats of pain and death. The words he screamed at her for not being what he wanted, not what he married. Loki didn't care, they never cared. It just hurts to hear someone say it. To hear someone say all the things they know deep down are true.

They didn't regret going on the trip, they had fun for the most part. The last day was a good memory until the end. Even with all of the work they had, it was still fun to do something most work-related. They didn't do that often, so it was nice. They got to wear some of the clothes they enjoyed, they got to really just have fun without someone telling their husband.

They wonder if they should have taken Viringia’s way out of going. It would have been easier to deal with the outcome. They would have to go back to a house that they knew they weren't welcome in. They would have to try and keep their composure the whole time on the plane or in the car. They could have just enjoyed some time in their garden and got drunk till the sunset.

That's not what happened though, they had gone on the trip and Justin had found out. He had come home earlier than expected and with Loki's recent dodging of his calls, he just wanted to do something with them. When he had broken through his mind that they weren't in the house, he had taken the time to go to their garden. He called them right after he couldn't find them.

They knew they were walking into their death as they told the driver to pull up to their house. They tried to pay no mind to Justin standing in the doorway. They just told the driver to stay in the car and leave when they closed the trunk after they got their suitcase.

Justin had the decency to not start the screaming match till they were in the house. He waited till Loki set down their bags in the lounge area before commenting on everything he knew they hated. He picked at what she wears, picked at the slight softness of her body, picked at the scars on her wrist. He picked at the small flaws it took years to realize. He picked at the smell of smoke that always surrounded her, the smell of alcohol that was always on her breath. He picked at how they would hit their nails and then put extensions over them to hide it, how they would have to change them every other day to hide the fact they were a bit off a nail or two.

He picked at how they wished for stuff they didn't deserve, because they only deserve him. He picked at how they had no one but him. He picked at the fact they had nowhere to go after this conversation. He picked at the fact that they would rather take care of plants than take care of themselves. He picked at the fact they would probably be loved if they cared just a bit more about their appearance, maybe then someone would actually find them the least bit attractive.

And Loki sat there, listening to the same comments they had to deal with for years. The same complaints they get on their wedding day when Justin just had to point out how the dress made them look like a whale. The comments about how freakishly tall she was, and how no man would find that appealing. The way Justin would grab their stomach before talking about how they could have baby weight yet they still didn't have a kid.

They tried to shift away from him, from the branding they just couldn't take right then. They just didn't want that, not when they knew what he was doing. As they did so, they got a chance to look out the glass doors that lead to their sacred garden. They didn't even try to pretend to be listening as they turned fully at the display.

“I thought you could use a bit of a punishment after going against my word,” Justin had smoked as tears welled in their eyes. Their roses had been chopped down, their hedges taken out with a chainsaw they hit in the shed. The flower arches smashed down into rubble. Slowly tramped, and their veggie portion of the garden uprooted.

Grass slowly dying from whatever poison he spread, killing the once vibrant flowers around them. The soft trees they kept chopped down and dragged away. The small center area was violated with spray paint and a few things were broken. Their one single charge smashed into nothing but scrap wood.

They didn't know what made them snap. It could have been the murder of the one good thing in their life or the sly smirk on Justin's face. It could have been the way he said he ‘forgave them’, all they had to do was quit their job and everything could go back to normal. It could have been the way he just chuckled when a few tears pushed their way past their eyes and down their cheek.

Loki just turned around and started to walk up the stairs, ignoring the questioning look from their husband. They shrugged him off and tuned out his favorite 'don't be so dramatic’ line. All that sped through their mind was the wreck that was their garden.

They didn't have a car, they didn't have a place to stay, but that was the last of their worries. Loki shut the door before Justin could walk in, locking it as they lean against it. They grabbed the suitcase from their closet and started throwing all of the clothes they liked into it. They put all of the work they left behind into a spare messenger bag, sliding the rest of their makeup into it as well.

There was a hotel only a five-hour walk from the house, though they should add some time for having to care for all of their bags. They looked at the phone that sat silent, only a single text showed on the screen. Loki showed little mind, trying to work fast as Justin slammed his fists onto the door and screamed at them more.

They didn't use their magic much nowadays, but it still has its use. A quick mumble of words and green energy flowing through their fingers caused the house to go quiet. They glided through the door and past the frozen man, they would only have a few minutes before it wore off. They practically fan down the stairs and out the door, making sure to grab the bags left from the Japan trip.

The sun had settled by the time they started walking down the street. They had trouble carrying two suitcases, two messenger bags, and a duffle bag, especially when the ride to the next town was quite hilly. Their feet acted as if they kept walking. The sharp pain of the heels digging into their heels as they climbed another hill. Loki ignored the passers-by, ignoring the few men that passed that cat called them. They were tired and lightheaded when they finally stepped into a small hotel-looking building.

They wished they had teleported, but the energy use would only make their body more fucked up when they got there. Their ears rang and their legs wobbled as they stumbled to the front desk. They rushed through the poses of getting a room, not really caring about the quality. They had the money to spend on a night or two, as long as the room was cheap.

As they struggled to pull up their suitcases on the concert stares, that looked like they would fall apart at any moment, they could see a few men staring at them. Loki didn't care, they could take care of them later if they needed to. The balcony that showed all of the doors looked barely connected to the railing, parts of the concert slabs falling down to the ground below, leaving holes in the walkway. They tried not to jump when a loud bang shouted through the air as they unlocked the door.

The room itself wasn't anything unique. If Loki was being honest, it looked like a set for a 1980s porno. The walls were a thick smoky yellow with flowery patterns underneath. The carpet was a dirty purple color. They could smell the filth and grime with a quick breath. The bed looked like it hadn't been cleaned in some time, still undone by the past customer.

They dropped all of their stuff before dragging the small desk in front of the door. With the lock and the desk, they would wake up if anyone tried to break in. When they looked back at the bed, their head started to squirrel once more. The thoughts of the day shoot back into their mind.

As they fall onto the gross bed, they let the small sob leave their lips. They tried to pretend not to feel the tears fall down their cheeks. They ignored the sound of their phone ringing from a text message. They didn't have time for whoever wanted to talk, they had other things to worry about. Well, right then all they wanted to do was cry and scream into the slightly pink pillow still their voice gave out.

They didn't even check who it was, but if they did, they would have seen it was from Virginia Potts who was just worried about her friend.

Chapter Text

{New York, 2007}

Just staying a night at the hotel turned into weeks. Sure, Loki had a job but apartments close to the city were ridiculous in price while the hotel was far cheaper. She didn't like the place, but the owner understood the situation and gave her cheaper prices for her long stay. She may have to move rooms once in a while, but she got used to it.

She got used to the type of people that stayed at the hotel, from people like her that found it hard to get an apartment, to others that probably killed people in illegal surgeries in the room next to her. She befriended the woman that would work on the street corner that she passed on her walk home. She sometimes chatted with them when she could, finding them interesting.

The room still sucked, but she didn't feel bad for smoking inside since the walls already showed she wouldn't be the first. She cared even less when she realized how thin the walls were. She tried not to pay attention to how much more she started to smoke, especially when she started smoking anytime she wasn't in her office.

Loki still worked, if not more. A twelve-to-five schedule in the office turned into getting there at five in the morning and leaving at ten at night. She didn't want to burden the drive that late at night, so she tended to walk back to the hotel. Loki started to be happy that she grew up as a warrior prince and helped her when things got a little shady.

She kept most of her stuff in her pocket dimension, not wanting to see a reason for leaving the housing situation because of stealing. She kept the desk pushed against the door when she was in it. It came in handy when she heard banging against her door. Whoever they were trying to push open the door she realized they picked the lock.

She retaliates by slamming on the left wall of the place. Loki had made friends with the guy next door. She didn't jump when a gunshot rang out and the sound of someone running away. The guy tended to do illegal work, giving Loki small cuts if she helped keep people from finding out. He also tended to help her move stuff if she had to move rooms for some particular reason. Loki thinks his name is Jake, but they never really expunged names.

The money that wasn't spent on the hotel, was either used on food and cigarettes or saved for later. Loki always got Sundays off, so they found a tendency in working out. It wasn't necessarily intense, but enough to keep in shape. She tried not to think about the words from Justin as she did so, tried not to focus on the softness of her body. It did make her feel better when people commented on her strength, even though she knew she could hold much more than a human.

When Loki isn't working or working out, searching for a real place to stay. She loved to dress fancy, but she always dressed down when looking at the places she could afford. As it neared December, she finally found a real living situation that didn't charge by the day. Sure, the place would be with a whole family, but the person she talked to seemed nice. Even if the place was a bit crowded and dirty, it was a real place to stay.

Loki still talked to Virginia and hung out when they could. They used to go over to Loki's home after work when they felt like it. She knew Virginia was confused when Loki said they couldn't do that anymore. They started staying at Virginia’s place when they wanted to, meaning Loki could actually cool things when she was over. She didn't question why Loki always seemed to make something, from dinners to sweets Virginia always had something to eat after.

“Are you sure you don't want to be a cook or run a bakery?” she joked as she ate the new set of cookies Loki had made. Loki would always laugh about it, sometimes even making a comment about how she used to want to run one. It was true, she had wanted to and actually opened one back in the 70s. She still is sad she had to close it when Luck passed.

Sometimes Virginia would work out with her. The first time she came, she was truly amazed at how easily Loki could do most things. It was nice to have someone there that she knew, someone that made looking at her body a little bearable. Virginia would make her feel better when she found out about Loki’s hatred for the softness of her skin.

Loki hasn't talked to Stark since the trip, but she has seen him from time to time. Sometimes it was meeting that Loki would rush away before he could talk to her, or it was when she was waiting for Virginia after work. Either way, she didn't feel like talking with him, even if he looked like he wanted to.

When the new year started, she had moved into a small room at the new house. She could hear the people downstairs having fun, celebrating surviving another year. She just laid in her small twin bed that she could barely fit in. Soft tears leaked from her eyes as she stared at the craving ceiling over her. She didn't mind the small poodles that formed at the side of her face. It was just another year. Another year to add to the list she had lived through. She did not intend to join, she stopped really celebrating when the year turned 1960. So there she lay, in a house filled with people she barely knew, knowing she had nothing to do but work. She didn't know if it was comforting or not.

Chapter Text

{New York, 2008}

“I once killed a man,” Loki said before putting another fork full of solid into his mouth. He sat at his office desk with a simple salad he made in the morning. Across from him was Virginia, who ate leftovers from the cooking Loki made at her place the night before. He doesn't really remember how the conversation got to a murder, but it did.

Virginia looked up with wide eyes. “You're joking,” she said while her eyes filled with surprise. Loki just shook his head no. ``did he deserve it at least.”

“I do not remember. It was late at night and a lot was going on at the time. It was all a blur, but I do remember killing and hiding his body,” he said as he kept eating. “I didn't wish to do it if that's what you're worrying about. Things were just happening and I truly didn't have control over the situation.”

“I guess that makes it better,” she said as she went back to eating, still eyeing him. “You do regret it, correct?”

“Yes, I wouldn't have done it if I didn't have to,” he kept eating. “Your turn,” this was a game to them, exposing big things. Loki knew there were things that he couldn't say, but it had been over a year, closing two, that they had been friends. It just felt rude to not tell her a little bit about himself. The game was simple, they just said something they thought the other would be surprised about. There was no true limit to what you could say, and it could be something small if you wanted it to be.

“Well, it's hard to outdo that,” she chuckled softly, “I once slept with Tony Stark. It was a while ago, and things just happened. It was fun, but not something I would actively seek out.” she shrugged.

Loki nodded, “I understand. As you know, I've had my time in his bed.” they both chuckled at that. “Honestly, it was a good time, I just want something serious.”

Virginia offered a small smile in return. “At least you got Hammer on your back. You know what I said before, it will take time. There are wounds that he left that need to heal. Your partner will come with time.”

“I know,” he smiled. Virginia’s phone went off, signifying the end of their conversation. She closed up her food and said her goodbyes. She had a few things she had to figure out for when Stark went to Afghanistan for a showing of his missiles.

Loki knew he couldn't talk about what he read from there, not without losing his job. Though, he did worry about Stark going to a place that holds a lot of weapons of his own design. But, he knows what's going on, and it's not Loki’s job to worry. He barely gets paid enough for all the translation work he does, worrying would not fit into his pay.

So there he sat, translating the new batch of papers and emails that sometimes made him ill and other times made him happy. Either way, they would be transferred to the right people.

Normally he would stay late, maybe watch the sun go down through his high office window, but his head had booked a headache. It made him feel utterly useless. So the packed up his stuff clocked out and started the walk back to the small house with far too many people living in it.

It was around eight when he walked through the door. Two young kids were running around, while two of the older boys sat in the kitchen/dining room. He dropped his bag down onto the table before going to make himself a bowl of cereal. Halfway through, the heat of the unairconditioned house got to him. He pulled off his suit top and blouse, not caring about showing his beep green bra.

After tossing the clothing into his bag, he finishes making his food before sitting down next to the younger of the two at the table. The conversation was on something he didn't care about, though he did give his input when it was asked for.

It was a peaceful evening, one of the few days he got back before everyone else had gone to bed. It was until he got a text from Virginia to check the news. When he was able to resolve the remote from one of the kids, he switched to see something he didn't expect. Tony Stark had been kidnapped.

--

To say that the office was hectic would be an understatement. The news was coming in to get information, higher-ups screaming in meeting rooms, and worst of all, people were constantly asking him if he had any information from past translations.

Look, Loki isn't a bad person. He would have given the information, the threats that come to higher-ups, and the requests that were never filled. With the goodness of his heart, he would have given everyone the copies. But some guy had treated him not to. Looked Loki in the eyes and said if he did, they would find a new translation. Loki needed this job, and if that meant letting a person die because of it, that wouldn't be the first time.

So Loki said he didn't have anything. He just had to shrug when anyone asked. Even when Virginia was worried and had asked them over and over if he was sure about not having anything, he just shook his head no. It hurt, lying to her, but he didn't get the title of ‘god of lies’ for nothing.

As the days passed, little information came in about what happened. Well, to everyone else, there was very little. But there was one man making promises and still talking for the ten rings, meaning Loki still had to translate and pretend to not know what was going on. He still had to lie and say that nothing new had come up, that there was nothing he could do.

He was relieved when he got word that Mr. Stark had been found. He had been one of the first people to find out. The information was told with a vague threat once more. He just had to nod before the man walked away.

Loki had gotten the day off when Stark held his little press conference. He stood making lunch with the older people in the house while the TV was on. It surprised him, to see how Stark acted. He was even more surprised when he said he would stop producing military weapons. He just knew that Virginia would be talking his ear off when she got a chance. Loki will admit, it made him giggle when Stark told everyone to sit down with him.

Just as suspected, while Loki was sitting on his slightly too-small bed, Virginia called. They chatted about the conference and what would come from it. Loki made jokes, trying to make his friend happier about the whole situation. Though around eight he had to hang up because his roommate came home and wanted to sleep. He just worked on his work for the rest of the night.

Chapter Text

{London, 1967}

They knew it was a stupid idea. It was too close. They had moved away less than a decade ago and they made the stupid mistake of coming back.

Loki could see them watching them. They knew they wanted them for something. People from their past still remembered them and that was severely dangerous. They don't age and people were starting to get suspicious of how that could happen. People still remembered their bakery, still remembered their old husbands.

They knew they were being watched by more than civilians. They had gotten weird looks from time to time. That's what happens when you're immortal. There is always someone questioning how you look the way you do. You also learn how to blend in far easier than anyone else. One of the biggest things you learn is to never stay in the same place too long.

Well, Loki broke that rule. They had left and moved back to London far too fast. They had remarried and pretended to not know anything like normal. They just missed the city. They missed the memories around it. They had even seen one of Richerd’s old cars. They got to see the building of their old bakery, and see parks they used to love.

They heard the whispers, the rumors, and the comments. Their husband at the time didn't seem to notice. He did notice when people showed too much intent in questioning their relationship.

It got worse when the bugs started to show up. Loki knew they had gotten the government's eyes on them. They had been good at pushing away from their prying eyes, but it was getting difficult. People moved into the apartment next to them, trying to listen in, and giving them stuff with bugs. Loki couldn't stay much longer before things got dangerous.

It was beeping in the night, far into winter, when they had to leave. Loki knew he couldn't leave anything about themselves there, that included a past lover. He could tell people about things that could get them killed or caught. Sure, they weren't the worst of the people they had been married to, but that doesn't mean anything.

They had slipped out of bed and pulled out the knife under their pillow. They moved quietly around the bed before they stood above him. The bile in their stomach lurched up, trying to climb their throat. They swallowed it down before pressing the knife to their husband’s throat.

They were not a bad person, they never wanted to be. No matter what Odin said. No matter what Thor said. They never wanted to kill, never wanted to harm. They just wanted to play a joke. It wasn't their fault Odin wanted to steal them from their original home.

They went to the bathroom after they finished him. They watch their red-stained hands rinse with water. They tried not to look at the toilet, not wanting to chance to throw up. They had to leave before it was too late.

They grabbed the bags they had already packed, not looking at the red that covered their old bed. They do regret not giving the man a better way out, they just can't make a wrong move right now.

“I'm sorry,” was the last thing they said in that apartment before fleeing the country. They had already decided to go back to Chicago. They had lived there once, but that was thirty years ago and time has changed. They hoped they had better luck there.

Chapter Text

{New York, 2008}

When Loki heard a girl shriek and slam into the room, she knew that the day was starting. The girl was around thirteen, and one of the only people in the house she hated. The girl jumped and screamed at her older sister. Loki pulled herself out of her bed and grabbed the little girl, partly dragging her out of the room. She sighed when the door shut, faint screams still coming through.

She heard a mumbled thanks from the opposite bed. “No problem. Am I allowed to smack her? She’s making my hangover worse.” she falls back onto her bed. She watched the other woman shift and squirm. “I'll make breakfast if I'm allowed to slap her once.”

“Deal,” a hand popped out from under the blankets. Loki shocks it before stretching her arms over her head. As she slipped on a long skirt, she moved out the bedroom door. She didn't really care about the fact that is just wearing a skirt and a bra, most of the occupants are girls and the four boys were either dating someone, don't care, or were gay.

When she got down to the kitchen, most of the boys were awake. Loki heard the girl from earlier bitching and moaning about something Loki didn't give a shit about. Recently the girl spotted her presence and started grabbing at her and pulling at her arms. Loki just shoved her away before going to grab the supplies for pancakes.

“Who wants them,” she asks before pushing the girl away once more. Everyone yelled in the agreement of wanting some, even the girl. Loki bent down and got into the girl's face “You can make them yourself. Maybe that will teach you not to scream at people while they sleep.”

In an hour, breakfast was ready and everyone was there eating. Loki finished her portion and left to get ready. It was difficult in the small room that really wasn't made for more than one bed, let alone two and two dressers. It took a lot of practice before she could do it without falling. With her suit with a skirt bottom and heels on, she grabbed her back and headed off.

To light a cigaret for her walk, smoking as she passed the normal sights. She just missed the rush, meaning she could smoke on the subway. By the time she got to the stark industries, she had burned through at least five.
She put it out and put on some perfume in an alleyway to hide the smell. Loki pops in some mint gum as she walks through the door. She waves to the receptionist and just goes to her office. She ignores most people, just walking by without care. She sets up her office and gets straight to work.

---

Most people leave the office around five. People who stay late for projects tend to stay till eight at the latest. It was nine when Loki finally finished the last of her work. With a sigh, she takes a sip of her infinite flask. She smiles at the soft durn as it goes down her throat. She jumps when she hears a knock at her office door, throwing the flask into her small pocket dimension before the door opens.

“Thought you would still be here,” Tony Stark said as his tired eyes gaze at her. He looked a little worse for wear, in his sweatpants and tank top, but Loki couldn't judge someone who just got kidnapped. Loki’s eyes did catch the soft blue glow radiating off his chest under the fabric of his top.

“Is there something that you need Mr. Stark?” she looked him over once more. He didn't look like he normally did when he visited the office for a meeting. She didn't want to make it unconquerable, she was just confused about what was going on.

“Did you know,” he closed the door as he walked in, “about where my weapons were going.”

“I do not know what you are talking about sir,” she kept eye contact as he sat down in the chair opposite her desk.

“Don’t lie to me, Lucy. I know someone threatened you, and i won't let it go through. Please, tell me if you know.”

“I've done a lot of regrettable things in my life, and having to see all of that and do nothing is one of the worst,” Loki and back. “If I'm being honest, I thought you knew all about it.”

“What exactly were you treated with?”

“That Stark Industries would higher a new translation, that nowhere would hire me if it got out.'' Green meets Brown when she locks eyes with him. “If you haven't heard, me and Justin are going through a ‘hard time’ at the moment, leaving me in a position where I need every cent I can take. I did not think it would bring you harm.”

“I don't blame you, I understand the circumstances.” he sighed, whipping a hand over his face. Loki just watched. He looked like he had aged several years in just a few days. He looked tired, and the ball in his chest was still glowing a soft blue. “Would you mind if I ask what happened with Hammer?”

“Only if you tell me about the glowing mass under your tank top,” she lifted one of her eyebrows.

He chuckles softly, “My heart got fucked up when I was kidnaped. A guy named Yinsen helped me out and put a battery-powered engine thing where it used to be.'' He pulled off his shirt, letting her green eyes roam over the glowing blue reactor in his chest. She could hear a barely audible hum that she knew he couldn't hear. “I upgraded it a bit before i started an escape plan.” he taps it with his finger, giving a small smirk when he sees the amazement on her face. “So, about you and Hammer.”

“He found out about my job here. Wanted me to quit and go back to being his perfect little wife. He said his normal things to get me to follow his rules. You know, degrading me on my appearance and personality. It bubbled over when I saw what he did to my garden” she sighed, her fingers hitting the desk in a rhythmic pattern. She watched as he put his top back on, taking a moment to appreciate his body while his eyes were covered. “I packed my stuff and left.”

Stark nodded at that, using a hand to rub behind his neck. “I'm sorry that happened to you,” Loki smirked as she stood, towering over the man.

“It is not your fault Mr. Stark,” she started putting all of her things into her messenger bag. “I have found a place to stay where rent is ridiculous, though I do hate I don't have much privacy. I have to keep a lot of my stuff in storage.'' She looks back at him as she walks around the desk. “Now, if we're done, I would like to head back before terrible people come out and play at night.”

Stark seemed to pick up at that. “How about I drive you back?” he asked, setting up a little.

“I didn't know you could drive since you always have a drive,” she commented.

“Well, when you get rich enough where you can pay someone to do it, you tend to go that route.” he shrugged, “and I can drive a car thank you very much”

“Fine, I guess I could let you drive me.” she smiled ever so slightly down at him. She started to walk out the door, looking over her shoulder when he hadn't moved. “You coming or what?” she giggled when he rushed over and started to show her where he parked his car.

---

The car wasn't anything special. She’d say she recognized the brand, but she didn't. Loki liked older cars, not the new polished kind. It was nice and felt really expensive. She would never admit to enjoying the heated seats, or how cool the lights at the bottom of the car were. She did hear Stark start talking about the car and other things. It was kinda cute, it reminded her of how Richerd would rant about his cars.

She told him the directions to get to her neighborhood. They had stopped partway through to stop and get something to eat at a fast-food restaurant. Loki got Stark to laugh as she made fun of the place and most of the fast food in general. It took them around an hour and a half to get back to where she was staying.

She knew the look on his face was surprising, the way his eyes went big and most did not shut close. She chuckled and shook her head softly. She could see the eldest man sitting on the porch, looking drunk and yelling at anyone passing by. She knew she would have to kick him away and then have to go inside and deal with people thinking the person who was in was him.

“Thank you for the ride, it was nice.” Loki looked back at him. He nodded again but looked back when the man started to stand up.

“Is he going to be a problem?”

She shook her head, “Nothing I'm not used to,” she made a showing motion with her hand. She grabbed her bag and opened the door before turning back around to him. “Really, it was nice. We could do something like it again.” she had before closing the door and walking back to the house.

When Loki finally got into the house, he finally drove away. She sighed once more, the day she had finally pulled at her again. She just pushed herself up the stairs and into her room, falling face-first into her mattress. She fell asleep in her work clothes that night.

Chapter Text

{New York, 2008}

Time went on, that's all he could say. May turned into October before his eyes. Soon small Halloween pumpkins started popping up in the office. Loki found it a little cheerful, seeing signs of happiness.

He could also make some of his baked goods to give away. It was harder to make with the far less spaced and having to buy most of the spices, but he had to do that back in the Depression.

Loki had always had a connection with the spooky holiday. The spices he loved were used more and people tried to scare each other, he loved it all. He truly never will get over the look he got from putting spice into his pumpkin spice lota.

He adored helping the kids in the house put up decorations. He pulled little jokes on the family, smiling when they laughed after. He talked to his colleagues a bit more and laughed with them.

He still worked his hardest till the sunset. Some nights Stark would stop by for small chats before he drove him home. Sometimes it was meaningful conversations. But there were days they just talked about food. He normally bought food while on the drive.

Loki enjoyed those talks. Stark didn’t make him talk unless Loki wanted to. Loki didn't talk in any conversation and Stark never judged.

He also gave Stark some of his back goods sometimes. Loki would smile when Stark would talk with his mouth full because he wanted to say how good they were and just couldn't wait.

Loki liked October a lot. Though there were parts of it that he hated. He really didn't enjoy the weather.

--

It was just a normal day. Loki had seen the dark clouds moving closer on the walk to work. He saw the soft drops of rain fall down from the sky when he sat in his office, taking a moment in his lunch to watch them through the large window on one of the walls. It was quite calming, yet terrifying at the same time. Rain could turn into something so much worse, and Loki truly wasn't looking forward to the storm that might come from just a few drops.

Loki tried to pay it no mind to the soft tapping of drops hitting the window only a few steps from his desk, but it just gets harder the longer he sits. He made it to lunch before the thoughts of the past started to reserve.

Loki didn't even realize he was moving till they were in the parking lot, hiding under one of the covers so he wouldn't get hit by the rain. Green eyes didn't look away from the crying sky as manicured hands pulled out a cigarette and a green light. He could feel his lungs fill with the burning sensation he learned to love in the 50s. The smock screamed through his lungs, scratching at his throat and their nostrils as it went in and out of his body.

It didn't rain much on Asgard. The only instance that the sky would cry like it did today was when Loki’s brother got upset. The thought of the blind throwing on his fits always made Loki want to pick up another glass of expensive scotch or a lit cigarette. The memory of his large brother throwing things and screaming about how things were not what he wanted always clouded his mind when the sky cried like it did at that moment.

The worst of those memories was when Loki didn't do as told when Loki didn't fit what was supposed to happen. When the sky did not just cry, but scream as well. Those were the days, when the sky wanted to scream, that Loki couldn't truly survive the day.

The memories of his brother stormed into his room, mad and fueled with adrenalin. The memories of his having fists slammed into him, hurtful words roared louder than the cries of the weather outside. The breaking of glass and the tearing of paper would echo through his room till his brother was done. When their parents would assume that Loki was at fault for his brother’s rage. The memories of the healers showed him no mind, even when he couldn’t move properly after his brother’s tantrum.

As the minutes of Loki’s lunch break ticked by, so did the amount of cigarettes in the pack he had. He showed no mind to how his eyes clouded up and soon started to weep as the sky did. He wondered who would be blamed for his brother’s outrage when they finally had enough of Loki. Who would be their new punching bag?

By the time Loki finishes his pack, his lunch break is over. He wiped off the salty water from under his emerald eyes, hoping it didn't smug his makeup. He walked past people with red puffy eyes, mascara slightly melted under his eyes. He tried to keep his mind on the sound of his heels clicking as he walked. He had other things to worry about than the looks he got from other people. Even if some of them were out of good faith.

--

It was around ten when Loki decided to go home. The rain had only picked up a bit since the last time he was outside. Times like this made him happy that he stole an umbrella from Justin before leaving.

The city of lights, that is what New York City was always called, though Loki found that hard to believe till he started working in it. The last time he lived here was in the 40s. The lights were so much brighter now, but really the city hasn't changed much. Well, there was a lot less war propaganda.

Loki had hated the walk from work to the house, but sometimes it wasn't that bad. Sure, sometimes it felt like someone was going to jump him at any minute but sometimes just being alone was just what he needed. Living in a house with like seven other people that he is not related to makes it hard to get a moment of rest.

What didn't make the night better was some asshole that decided to drive past at full speed and splash a big puddle onto him? That led to a lot of fruitful language leaving his mouth. Now he was shocked, it was raining, and he was another hour away from the house. Loki just flipped off the sky and kept walking.

---

The sound of the door slamming shut echoed through the house around twelve a.m. and Loki tried to close the umbrella. He was shocked from head to toe, and his makeup was running down his face. By the time they got the stupid umbrella closed, thunder started to roll in. They moved past the couch that held one of the boys and headed up the stairs. They tried to not make much noise, but when the lightning flashed through the windows, they just tried to rush to his bed.

They cared little about getting his clothes off, just wishing to hide from the thoughts that came with the storm. The thoughts of pain and anger. The memories were only drenched in harm. He wished for cold smoke but that meant dealing with the weather. The only bit of liquor was in his bag downstairs.

They curled into his bed, pulling the blanket over his head. Loki puts his hands over his ears, trying to drown out the sound of thunder, screwing his eyes shut so as to not see the flashes of lighting.

They drowned out everything with the soft sobs that fell from their lips. Soft droplets fell from his eyes and onto his pillow, seeming to hug part of his face. He wishes for it all to go away, for a moment of peace.

But that never came. No, that will never come. In this world, it rains whenever there is too much water vapor in the sky. He just has to wait it out because that's all he can do.

Chapter Text

When Loki woke up, it was Saturday, their one day off. The storm had passed, leaving the world in a layer of water. The storm left trash blown over and the grass muddy. Loki could hear some kids playing outside in the puddles that were left behind, laughter and giggles filled the street for a few minutes.

Loki didn't show much emotion to that, just pulled out of bed and went downstairs to make themselves breakfast. They barely had the energy to lift their feet so they didn't fall, so they all fell into their chair after they made a small bowl of cereal. Their eyes wish to close again and their hand slightly shacks as they bring the spook to their still green-covered lips. They only looked up when the eldest of all the kids walked in. She was in her twenties, so not really that old but still paid a lot of the bills besides Loki.

“I sometimes wonder if you're just a walking corps,” she said as she made herself food. The woman had a point. Loki hadn’t cleaned off their makeup before going to bed, leaving their dark lipstick smudged and messy, their mascara had dripped that left black lines down their face. They still wore the clothes from yesterday and just looked messy. Not going to mention the messy bun that used to be perfect till they went to sleep.

“A corpse that pays rent,” Loki said before putting another mouth full of cereal into their mouth. They blow a stray hair out of their face, ignoring the woman sitting next to them.

“At least you pay rent,” she rolled her eyes with a small smirk. At least Loki paid rent, so they didn't get little comments often on how dead on their feet they looked, especially on their one day off.

The two changed into eating in silence. Eventually, other kids can in for breakfast, meaning things got a little bit louder. Loki just cleaned their bowl and left to go back to their room. They could hear the loud people even in the bedroom causing a headache to bloom.

Loki finally changed into something else, hoping that might help. The thoughts of the night before echoed through their battered mind. They pulled on some simple leggings and a loose T-shirt. They pulled their hair into a quick bun and went to the bathroom to fix their makeup. It was just some simple mascara and red lipstick, nothing big.

Afterward, Loki grabbed their bag and headed out the door. They didn't have a place in mind, they just needed to get out of the house. Their head still hurt and still felt too clouded with thoughts. Maybe some coffee would help, yeah that would help somewhat.

So they hopped on the subway to their favorite coffee shop. Nothing eventful happened, just a simple hour ride. A small boy stood in front of where they were sitting. The kid looked no older than five and held a toy that looked like that one superhero that had been running around. What was his name? Goldman? Ironguy? Loki didn't really care about the name, just that the toy got shoved out of the kid’s hands when people tried to get out to their stop.

It was a quick snap of the thing's neck, leaving the poor thing decapitated. The kid's mother didn't pay attention to her child that started to cry and thought it got Loki’s attention. They leaned down and picked up the pieces. With a small string of emerald magic, the head was back in place as if it hadn’t been broken. Loki chuckled at the wonder-filled kid's eyes as they did so. They handed the toy back, smiling at the young boy. “Be a bit more careful next time,” they tell him before they get up for their stop.

Loki tries to focus on the rushing world around them than the memories that desperately wanted to be the main focus of their mind. Hell, even the catcallers were better than the images of their brother. They just pushed throw through, they had better things to do than wallow in self-pity.

They eventually got to the coffee shop they were looking for. It was a small little thing at the bottom of a large apartment building, but it made some of the best coffee in all of new york. The place had a good few people already there, but the line wasn’t dramatically long. By the time they got to the front of the line, more people had joined the cafe. They hurried over to an empty table to wait for their drink. While waiting, someone walked up to their table. When they looked up, it wasn't a waiter.

“Do you really head all the way here for coffee on your day off?” Tony asked. He was wearing a dark red suit. He motions to the chair in front of them, “That seat is taken?” sitting down when Loki shook their head.

“Just come from a meeting?” Loki looks at him. It was around that time they got their drink brought to them. It was their normal, hot chocolate with five shots of espresso. They weren't surprised than Tony’s can and it was straight black coffee.

“Yeah, some boring thing Pepper said was important. It was hard to pay attention, didn't really sleep last night,” he took a sip of his coffee. Loki followed suit, trying to not get wipe cream on their lips while drinking the hot chocolate.

“I don't understand how you can party all night,” they shook their head. Just the thought of staying late and drinking with people makes them so tired. If Loki wanted to get drunk, they would do that in the privacy of their own room or in a quiet bar where they may be able to swing a free drink. They had been to the types of parties Stark enjoys, they would rather not attend them without someone else.

“Not that hard while you do it a lot,” Tony shrugs. He chuckles softly at Loki, who was trying to get off some of the cream from their upper lip. “Plus, you meet some fun people at night.”

“By fun people, you must mean hot women you can fuck,” they rolled their eyes. Not like they really could comment that much, they were one of those women. It was nice to talk to Tony, but it does annoy them at his playboy attitude sometimes. They really don't understand how Virginia can deal with stuff like that for part of her job. “Also, I just wanted to get out of the house.”

“Something happen?” stark had always been a little weary about the place they stay. With the drunks that tended to rome the streets or to the stories of sketchy things happening in the house, Tony had stated how he feels like it's unsafe.

“Just had a hard night and a horrible headache, nothing you need to worry your simple mind about,” they close their eyes when the cafe gets louder. The markets of Asgard were always like that, loud and busy. Sharp dall pain echoed through their head as people walk in and out of the cafe.

Their brain serged into some memory fog. Days where Loki would be dragged around with Thor to the markets, dealing with him and his obnoxious friends. “They're your friends too,” Fregga would always say. They weren't though. Sif and the worrier three weren't their friends. They would though Loki under a bus if they knew what a bus was.

The memories of staying in the forest to go hunting with Thor and his friends were something they didn't remember much of, probably because they tried to sabotage each trip till they just wouldn't take them anymore. They would rather be in their room or at the Asgard library than running around the woods trying to find some beast to fight.

They would always talk so loud to each other. Even when Loki tried to engage with any of them, they would just talk louder to drown out their voice. Sif was the worst when it came to that. She always made fun of them for not talking but then tell him to shut it when they did decide to speak their mind.

Loud, unexpectedly so. It all swirled around them. Every voice seemed to turn into one. The volume turned up slowly, every word screaming into their ears. Their breath seemed to come down to their lungs too quickly yet not quickly enough.

Laughter was something that always came next. The sound of laughter, either from the people around them or the memories of them. People standing around them, laughing at them for not being able to stay the way they were before it got too loud. ‘Dramatic’ was what some people called it, others just rolled their eyes. Now they were doing this in such a public place.

A ruff, caused hand fell onto theirs. When Loki opened their eyes once more, cold green met warm brown. The thoughts seemed to calm down for only a few moments. Just a few moments of peace. Tony just kept his hand in place, grounding Loki for the moment.

“How about we leave, the noise doesn’t seem to be doing anything good to you,” Stark looks at them, worry laced in his soft eyes. It had been a while since someone looked at them like that. That look terrified them more than anything. “I have a place only a short walk from here.”

Loki nodded, finishing their drink quickly before getting up. Their head started to feel a bit more than just pain. Weightlessness flooded their minds, their feet felt a little less than their own. With a quick shack of their head, they were back in the real world. Tony was still staring at them, rushing to get up as well.

Their mind clouded with fog, dissociated for most of the walk. Loki could hear the muffled voice of Stark as he tried to fill the silence between them. Sometimes it annoyed Loki, the endless talking that seemed to have no sense or purpose, but it helped keep them grounded enough to walk the block to Tony’s penthouse.

It took them an embarrassing amount of time to realize they were in an elevator. It was quiet, even Tony had stopped talking. The only real noise was the sound of the elevator moving up the floors and Stark tapping on his phone. They hopped he didn't see them jump slightly when the door binged before opening to his place.

Loki wasn’t sure what they were expecting but the place looked weirdly futuristic. It was all gray and white, technology in most places and things that were expensive for no other reason than to be expensive. It also wasn't the cleanest place. Again, that really wasn't surprising. Tony seemed like the guy to not know how to clean and from comments Virginia had made at lunch in the past, he higher someone to clean for the most part. There was also a whole bar with a shit tone of alcohol, which as a person with an alcohol problem, they could respect.

They both left the elevator, Tony walking in front of Loki. “make yourself at home,” He said before disappearing into one of the rooms. Loki falls back onto one of the expensive couches. They may have felt a little out of place, but it was calmer than at the cafe. Their breath just slowed, and their eyes fell shut. They just lay there on the plush couch, trying to not get too far into their head again.

Thoughts calmed down slowly, and soon they were just gone altogether. New thoughts popped up, though it was mostly related to work. It was their day off, should they really be things about work? They just let simpler thoughts and things to do in their mind play around in their brain, calming them down just a bit. It didn't take long for them to fall asleep.