Archive of Our Own ^beta

Shifty eyes and smug glances put Paintbrush’s bristles on end the entire day. Something was wrong, they knew it. There were unspoken words hanging heavy in the air during the challenge, and definitely after.

The atmosphere was suffocating. They were already having a terrible day that day, having gotten attached to and quickly losing a pet they had been assigned, and after that every little thing seemed to irritate them.

At least the Thinkers were.. Sort of back together? OJ was long gone, of course, but they were pleasantly surprised that, other than their lost companion, they were all still in the game.

A little family, they thought. They’d even started to grow attached to Silver, who’d previously been their number one annoyance. He… Well, he had a sort of “soft side” to him when you got to know him, when he trusted you.

Silver had confided in them a few times since they’d gotten along, and even comforted them when Test Tube got eliminated! They’d have never believed you if you’d told them this at the start, but now…

Now it was different.

And they’d found themself glancing over at him more, admiring his glimmering eyes, and his dorky laugh that brought butterflies to their stomach.

They were starting to think that maybe… maybe they liked him a bit more than friends. Although they tried to push those thoughts aside, the two were still rivals for fucks sake, although friendly ones.. and gods their friends would never let it down that they liked HIM of all people.

It was a few minutes before the elimination, and while they were fairly confident of their numbers, they still couldn’t help but worry every time. It was sort of a habit for them to want to at least talk to their closest friend at the current time before the voting started, it always calmed their nerves.

So, they found Silver lounging against a tree a little bit away from their allies, watching the conversation from a distance. They got a bit nervous going over to talk to him, but not in a bad way, they thought. They liked the feeling he gave them.

“Hey Silver.” they absently waved to him as they stopped a few feet away from him, a comfortable conversational distance for the both of them.

Silver seemed shocked at their greeting, responding with an obviously nervous smile.

“A-ah! I… didn’t see you there, Painty dear.”

Their heart dropped into their stomach at that nickname, mind running laps around their thoughts, trying to desperately string together any combination of words to respond to that.

“Did… did you just.. Call me ‘Painty”??” They stuttered over their own words, trying to hide their heightened pitch of voice, hoping the heat in their face wasn’t obvious.

Hands started to desperately wave around as Silver’s eyes widened and his own face lit up (from purely embarrassment they assumed) as he panickedly responded in his own patchworked sounds. “O-OH! I MEANT- I DIDN’T- yoU-”

Paintbrush stared blankly at the flushed face in front of them, one which was just slightly pointed, but still round and smooth, with a small dimple breaking up the perfect surface with a small flaw, one that made them love his face even more.

“I mean.. I don’t really.. Mind it.” they shyly admitted to him, causing Silver to pause in his tracks, seemingly having to take a moment to fully process their sentence. As he did, he lowered his arms to tuck them into each other, leaning back against the tree once again, eyes staring at some spot in the grass away from Paintbrush. The blush on his face never seemed to leave.

“W-well, now that you’ve thoroughly embarrassed me..”

They chuckled, “sorry, you just… caught me off guard with that, that’s all. I really don’t mind you calling me that, by the way. I.. like it.”

Silver simply stared at them for another moment before scoffing. “Whatever, that’s.. In the past now! And as we all know we must keep.. Moving on towards a prosperous future.. For us all.”

His demeanor changed back to the nervous one he’d originally had, not saying his nonsense in the energetic manner he usually did.

“Are you.. Alright? I noticed you’ve sorta been.. Out of it since the challenge ended.” they noted with a concerned expression, reaching a hand out to put on Silver’s shoulder which was quickly patted away.

“I am fine, my dear. Just.. still thinking about Utter Filth, I concur.”

“I’m.. not sure what you think concur means but I don’t think that’s it-”

“Oh hush your yap, lesser tall one.”

The two stared at each other for a moment, before laughing together; a hearty, genuine laugh; One that was rudely interrupted by a loud chime and catchy theme which meant that it was time.

“Ah, it’s.. Time.” they slumped a bit at that. Someone was going home, and there was going to be some new tension between teams.

…

They just didn’t think it’d be him.

Really, they should have seen it coming. He’d never been the best team player, and he’d always talk about leaving when the merge came.

But, naive as ever, they thought that had changed.

They thought…

“I thought you’d changed.”

The votes had just been revealed, and Candle had gone on some speech about not needing her anymore, all the while Silver stood there with that smug shit-eating grin on his face, one they’d grown to love.

But right now, all they felt toward it was anger.

“Hm?” Candle hummed in injury at their muttered words. They couldn’t give less of a shit about her at the moment.

Paintbrush’s eyes locked with Silver’s. He visibly shuttered, face dropping into a mixture of shock…

And fear.

They took a few steps forward, ignoring the quiet ushers asking what they were doing from Cabby and Yin-Yang. Their eyes never left him as he took a step away from them.

“C-Calm down, dear Painty-”

Something in them snapped hearing him say that nickname, and in an instant they were running towards him full force, with a fist pulled back.

The impact echoed through the elimination area, a few small gasps were heard, and a thud indicated Silver landing on the sand, a small cloud being kicked up in the process.

Tears pricked at Paintbrush’s eyes and their ears rang as the people around them stared in shock.

“Y-you… you don’t get to fucking call me that.” they spat out, voice laced with malice and rage. They could feel the heat emitting from their bristles, warming their face in stark contrast to the sharp, cold tears running down their face. Their eyes never left him.

Silver stared up at them in fear, eyes wide and hands hovering above the dark spot where they’d made impact, shaking.

After the initial shock left, everyone around quickly left their seats, Candle kneeling down to Silver, Cabby and Yin-Yang pulling them back.

“D-dear I- It’s just the game I swear!” He desperately called out, Candle trying to help him up. “It’s.. it’s nothing personal-”

With a fwoosh the flame was ignited, blinding everyone for a second, the light brighter than any of the surrounding torches.

“Just the- JUST THE GAME?? IS THAT ALL THIS WAS TO YOU???” they screamed out, tugging against the restraints of their only allies desperately holding them back. “Is that all you fucking cared about?! The fucking game?!?!” their voice wavered and cracked as they yelled, tears streaming down their face.

“Everytime I think I can trust someone they- they just- THEY JUST FUCKING LEAVE ME!!”

“...Paintbrush-”

“NO- No, shut the FUCK UP. I DON’T WANT TO HEAR WHATEVER BULLSHIT YOU’RE GOING TO SAY. You’ve made it clear, you didn’t give a fuck about me, or any of us. You just wanted our numbers, huh?? That’s all we fucking were to you, number in some stupid fucking game that NONE OF US WANTED TO PLAY IN THE FIRST PLACE!!”

Their words were choked out in between sobs, and their eyes started to burn from the heat.

“That’s all i’ve ever been, a fucking number! And- and I don’t know what i’m doing wrong but obviously it’s something because it’s always been like this, every fucking time!!”

The fire grew dimmer, their voice breaking.

“And- and I thought…”

They curled up into themself as much as they could being held back as their flame went out.

“...I thought this time would’ve been different.”

Those words lingered in the air for a while, everyone staring in stunned silence.

“...you take this wayyy too seriously dude-”

“Nickel shut the fuck up this is not the time!”

“Are you alright, Silver?”

“Y-yeah I… I guess.”

The world around them melted into one big blur as they fell out of their teammate’s hold and onto their knees, scraping them against the rough sand of the beachside. People were moving around, and soon they were left alone with their allies, pathetically sobbing on the floor.

-

After they’d calmed down enough to walk, they silently made their way back to their cabin, waving off the help that their allies offered them with a somber smile and a promise that they’d be fine on their own.

So that was a fucking lie.

They were currently curled up in their bed, clinging onto the plush they had brought to the trip originally to sleep with for the few nights they had originally planned on staying, crying their eyes out.

Faux VIP tickets, boat crashes, being forced into a game show, hope, hurt… they were so, so tired of it all.

All they wanted was a fucking break from the chaos of the hotel at a luxury resort with their friends, and what they got was the worst few months of their life.

Well, that might be an over exaggeration, but it’s definitely been the worst since they joined Inanimate Insanity; and that’s saying something considering how bad the show got sometimes… but it was nowhere near this bad.

Overall improvements of this season included far less death and better sleeping arrangements, but the flaws heavily outweighed that in their mind.

They wish they’d never accepted to go on vacation.

They wish they’d never started to trust Silver.

They wish they were-

Soft knocking on their door jolted them out of their quickly spiraling thoughts, and they quickly sat up.

“...Paintbrush..?” a soft voice carefully called out their name from the other side of the door, one with a very recognizable accent attached to it.

With a blanket wrapped around their shoulders, Paintbrush delicately opened the door a bit, just enough to see the object(s?) in front of their cabin.

“Oh.. hi.. Yin-Yang um- do you.. Need something..?” their voice was raspy and quiet and it hurt their throat to speak.

“Are you.. Alright? It sounded like you were crying in there.” the dark side of the duo spoke, although both fidgeted with their hands as they softly spoke.

They were a bit shocked to see Yang care just as much as Yin, although having been on the Thinkers caused them to bond with the two quite a bit, and Yang seemed very attached to the Thinkers.

Speaking of the Thinkers…

“Y-yeah i’m…”

With a creak the door was forcefully shoved inward and closed behind Yin-Yang as they invited themself in. Paintbrush panickedly tried to hide their face from the two, but it had already been made apparent how bad of a state they were currently in.

“You don’t seem okay.” “And honestly… Neither are we.” Yang and Yin said in turn, a somber expression across both their sides as they tensed up.

The bed slightly creaked as Paintbrush sat down with a sigh, patting the spot next to them, inviting Yin-Yang to sit with them.

Gladly accepting the offer, the two made themselves comfortable next to the brush, glancing away from them and instead taking in the limited decoration. A few fairy lights, a desk with some art supplies, a small nonbinary flag resting in a cup with various pens, (most supplied by Mephone to help contestants feel more comfortable during the long while they’re stuck on this terrible island) all haphazardly littering the room. They looked over at the plush resting in Paintbrush’s arms, a long and soft ferret plushie.

“I uh, like your long cat plush.”

Lightly chuckling into a hand, they held out the plush for Yin-Yang to feel.

“Yang you idiot that’s not a long cat, that’s a long DOG.”

“Nuh uh! It’s totally a cat!”

“Dog!”

“Cat!”

This went back and forth for a bit before Paintbrush got their attention with a hand on their shoulder. “Actually, it’s a ferret. They’re.. Kinda like cats, I guess, but longer and less moody.” They laughed out calmly.

Yin-Yang stared at them for a second, before looking down at the plush and smiling, hugging it close to their body.

“It’s very soft.”

“Ferrets are cool; but can they rip things apart with their teeth? Yknow, all like grgrgrgrgrr!!”

“Yang!”

“What? I just think they’d be cooler if they could destroy whatever is in their path, like a big dinosaur!!”

Maniacal laughter escaped from Yang while Yin looked at him in annoyance. Paintbrush softly smiled at them with tired eyes, before letting out a yawn.

In a chain reaction, Yin and Yang both followed in yawning, Yang playfully shoving them in faux annoyance at making them yawn, causing a small shoving fight to break out between the two, before they devolved into simple laughter.

After a while of casual chatting to pass the time, Yang yawned and leaned against Paintbrush’s side with his eyes closed.

“I’m tired, Painty, can we sleep here tonight..? Yin’s already asleep, and I don’t wanna go back to our cabin..”

They smiled at the nickname being used again; it isn’t the first time Yang used it for them, having referred to them like that while explaining the New Old Thinkers plan that he (and Cabby) made up.

At remembering that, they frowned, the betrayal a fresh wound in their gut that only got worse, even through their attempts to forget. They sighed.

“Uh, yeah, sure.”

Yang peaked their eyes open and looked up at them. “You alright Painty..?”

They forced a tired smile back onto their face, so as to not worry him. “Yeah, of course I am.”

“Is it.. About them..?”

Their face changed to a more shocked expression at how dead-on Yang was.. Though they figured he must be thinking a lot about them as well; he was very close with Candle.

“You still thinking ‘bout them as well?”

He silently nodded his head, still leaning against them, clutching their plush close to his chest.

“...Yeah.. I just.. I really don’t know why they just.. Flipped like that!” their hands shot into the air to further exaggerate their point, and they groaned and flopped onto their back, laying down in their bed. Yang hesitantly laid beside them, ferret plush still in his arms.

Paintbrush sighed, “Well, whatever it was… I’m sure Candle didn’t have anything against you.”

Yang looked up to them with an agape mouth, before smiling a big smile at them. “Thanks, Painty..”

With another yawn, Yang closed his eyes and cuddled up close to them with a small, content smile on his face.

Their own eyes started to flutter close as well, resting their head above his, lightly pulling a blanket over the two, and finally letting their own thoughts rest for the night.

Maybe the situation wasn’t the best at the moment, but the Thinkers who were left still had to stick together, because even when they were torn apart…

The Thinkers were forever.