Archive of Our Own ^beta

“Ryan, this needs to stop.” 

Ryan froze, quickly turning from his laptop screen to Shane standing by the couch, anxiously scrubbing a hand over his worn face. 

“What?” He said worriedly, while biting back the tremor that surfaced up because he knew he didn’t like where this was going. 

Shane sighed and averted his eyes, looking pained. “This… this just needs to stop. Us. Us just- fuckin- fooling around and like you know friends with benefits almost always largely fuck up in the end and I don’t want that!” Shane burst out in a panic. And Ryan thinks how unnerving and misplaced it looks on his face, foreign, on someone so usually and wholly calm and collected, no matter the situation. 

“It would— can destroy everything we made together. Watcher—” 

Ryan’s jaw tightened; trembling, “So that’s what this is then? For the company? You think we’re just gonna fuck up and risk our careers carelessly?!” 

Shane sighed heavily, “Ryan, I know we’re not that careless but it’s still a possibility!” He threw his hands up and paced around the open space of his apartment, before settling to stand with deliberate distance in front of Ryan. 

“It’s not just for the company either, Ry… it’s also not worth ruining the best friendship I’ve had in my life.” Shane whispered, biting his lip. “So I’m done, I’ll meet you in the morning with your usual coffee.” He said quietly, but also rapidly as he took quick long strides straight towards the door. 

Ryan, in a moment of panic, anger, and desperation, quickly caught up to pull him back “No, no you’re not leaving. I-I won’t let you goddammit!!” And then he spun him around, grabbed him by the collar, and pushed himself up for a searing kiss. 

Shaking, as they broke apart for air, Ryan speaks into his lips, “losing Watcher would hurt, yes, but losing you would destroy me even more… so please… stay with me? For real this time.” And after Shane looks at him in awe, he brings a hand to pull Ryan’s head closer for another deep kiss.