Archive of Our Own ^beta

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@SleepyDictionary created a group chat

@SleepyDictionary added @WednesdayAddams , @HunterNocedaClawthorneDeamonne , @CarmenSandiego , @MasonPines , and 22 others

SaraLance: the hell is this

ZariTomaz: captain??

TheMerlynQueen: SARA

TheaMerlynQueen: oh ew to this name

SaraLance: tHEA

MasonPines: @SleeyDictionary explain??

MarsWritezStuff: WEH

MarsWritezStuff: sorry had to take my binder off it’s been

MarsWritezStuff: a long time

MasonPines: nah ur good

MarsWritezStuff: yea so um

MarsWritezStuff: bai

TheaMerlynQueen: YOU STILL HAVE TO EXPLAIN THIS???

MarsWritezStuff: shut up I have school

CarmenSandiego: so uh

CarmenSandiego: intros?

SaraLance: sure

SaraLance: I am Sara, she/her bisexual former assassin and currently prisoner and pregnant fiancé

MasonPines: oh hey congrats!!

SaraLance: thx:)

SaraLance: I also happen to be no longer human

TheaMerlynQueen: hang on what

SaraLance: so Zari you should go next

ZariTomaz: yes ma’am

ZariTomaz: sup i’m Zari 1.0, she/her, hacker from the future and i live inside a totem

WednesdayAddams: I have a question for the assassin.

SaraLance: former*

SaraLance: but yea what is it

WednesdayAddams: How many people have you killed?

SaraLance: I didn’t keep track of the random missions but I’ve killed many important people

WednesdayAddams: Interesting

WednesdayAddams: I suppose I’ll go next.

WednesdayAddams: I’m Wednesday, they/them, I play the cello, write books, and am currently going to a literal school of outcasts. 

MasonPines: wow

MasonPines: (ignore my name)I’m Dipper, he/him, trans, last year I stopped the end of the world with my twin

SaraLance: I never did that with my sister but I have done it with my team

TheaMerlynQueen: squints 

TheaMerlynQueen replying to @SaraLance: sorry does this say prisoner

SaraLance: ITS A TIME PRISON

SaraLance: believe it or not, Thea, but my team and I regularly break both the laws of time travel and regular laws

Clotho: what in the bloody hell is this

ZariTomaz: Charlie:D !

Clotho: Z

Clotho: ARE U OK I HAVENT SEEN U IN FOREVER 

SaraLance: nice to talk to you too Clotho

SaraLance: also you saw her last night?

Clotho: as if you don’t do this with Ava

Clotho: you’re all “Ava this” and “Ava that” and “I hope Ava is ok” and “why the FUCK did I get pregnant when Ava would’ve been able to MANAGE it”

LloydGarmmadon: wait how did you get pregnant if your partner is female

SaraLance: well you see

SaraLance: Ava is a clone from the future

SaraLance: and I’m now a clone/alien hybrid thingy

SaraLance: so, basically, my team and I were reunited after I’d been on a spaceship for who knows how long and so I proposed, obviously, because great timing and then we kissed and the alien part of me decided “yep you’re due for a child in 9 months”

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Entrapta: faaaascinatiiiing

LloydGarmmadon: oh hey we never finished the intros

LloydGarmmadon: Lloyd, he/him, trans, I have a pet dragon

Entrapta: DRAGON

CatraMeowMeow: uh oh you’ve made her fascinated

CatraMeowMeow: run

LloydGarmmadon: WHAT

Scorpia: Entraputsa nko

Scorpia: catarraa hejlep 

SaraLance: is that one dying

Scorpia: no I just can’t type - Scorpia

CatraMeowMeow: scorpion pincers, y’know 

SaraLance: understandable

CatraMeowMeow: anyways

CatraMeowMeow: I’m Catra, she/her, lesbian war criminal

CatraMeowMeow: @Scorpia , they/it, lesbian scorpion

CatraMeowMeow: and @Entrapta , all pronouns, bisexual scientist/annoyance

MarcelineAbadeerPetrikovBubblegum: Marceline, they/them, married bisexual vampire/musician:)

SaraLance: a fellow married bi:D

MarcelineAbadeerPetrikovBubblegum: YOOOOO

BonnibelBubblegumAbadeerPetrikov: Bonnibel, she/her, married lesbian scientist.

AvaSharpe: fellow lesbian with good grammar, I see.

SaraLance: AVA MY BELOVED

MarcelineAbadeerPetrikovBubblegum: FELLOW BI MARRIED TO A LESBIAN???

AvaSharpe: technically, we’re engaged, but yes.

AvaSharpe: Ava, she/her, clone from the future(2213, to be exact).

Clotho: sup, I’m Clotho, the Greek fate, but call me Charlie

Clotho: they/them, musician

MasonPines: so we have a clone, an alien/clone, a vampire, and a human scorpion

MarcelineAbadeerPetrikovBubblegum: Bonnie is candy:)

CatraMeowMeow: am cat

WednesdayAddams: reverse prophet, detective, writer. 

LloydGarmmadon: ninja

MarcoDiaz: human:p

TomLucitor: demon prince

AutisticMarshmellow: human(used to have powers and was possessed once)

HunterNocedaClawthorneDeamonne: grimwalker

LuzNocedaClawthorne: human, but I can kinda so magic with glyphs? Also, grimwalkers are the demon realm version of clones

SprigPlantar: frog

KingClawthorne: king of demons!!

LuzNocedaClawthorne: (he’s a demon but also kinda the son of a god)

MasonPines: I am simply human

CarmenSandiego: same

[REDACTED]: me too

Clotho: as I said, Fate and shapeshifter

ZariTomaz: human

Thing: 🖐️

WednesdayAddams: That's Thing, he’s a severed hand.

MasonPines: so this chat consists of nine humans, a prophet/reverse prophet, Fate/shapeshifter, a demon, a clone, another demon/god, a frog, a ninja, a scorpion, a cat, a clone/alien hybrid, a different kind of clone, a hand, a vampire, and candy

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GliterrWlof: woah

MasonPines: another one???

GliterrWlof: helo am Enid:D

WednesdayAddams: greeting, roommate. 

GliterrWlof: WENSDAY!!!

MasonPines: rq, what’s your species 

GlitterrWlof: werwlof:)

Thing: 🖐🐺

WednesdayAddams: Enid has dyslexia, be nice or I’ll kill you

WednesdayAddams: also she said she’s a werewolf. 

RoyHarper: uh

TheaMerlynQueen: ROY

RoyHarper: hey

RoyHarper: Roy, he/they, trans, human with super strength

MarsWritezStuff: Wednesday you have a thing today, remember?

WednesdayAddams: oh, yeah. Thank you for reminding me. 

MarsWritezStuff: no problem

@MasonPines has changed their name to Dipper

SaraLance: we can do that??

@SleepyDictionary has changed 25 names

TimeMom: I hate you

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TimeMom: hang on

Simba: WEH ?

TimeMom: how tf did I get a phone in prison

TimeMom: it just appeared on my pillow the other day 

MarsWritezStuff: excellent question

@SleepyDictionary has gone offline

TimeMom: I want to both ground this child and adopt him

@SleepyDictionary has returned

MarsWritezStuff: yes pls

MarsWritezStuff: my mom would love to meet you

TimeMom: is she in need of the Lance Charm™️

MarsWritezStuff: ma’am you’re engaged

MarsWritezStuff: (also she’s married to my dad, so)

JournalEnthusiast: who are you lot?

WitchBiNight: dipper it’s us

JournalEnthusiast: this ain’t PineTree, lass

Speeeeed: then who the hell are you

JournalEnthusiast: Bill

MarsWritezStuff: I forgot to mention

MarsWritezStuff: Dipper and Marcy have remnants of two ancient evils from being possessed

MarsWritezStuff: Zari might as well, I’m not sure

MarsWritezStuff: sometimes Zari goes from 1.0 to 2.0

MarsWritezStuff: speaking of which, @AutisticMarshmellow you’ve been kinda quiet, u alright

SmortGay: ye, just hangin’ out w/ my girlfriends:)

MarsWritezStuff: if u want, when ur not busy I cn pay u a visit abd try to get the Coee into a separat body

SmortGay: shit, really? That’d be great!

MarsWritezStuff: also my dyslexic med is wearun off so speling wil get bad

MarsWritezStuff: gtg babyst my youngr siblng, bai

@SleepyDictionary has gone offline

JournalEnthusiast: finally I got my body back

WitchBiNight: dipper!

JounralEnthusiast: tis i:D

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WitchBiNight: worst fears go

WitchBiNight: Being a disappointment

TimeMom: drowning or boats(had a bad experience)

MusicWife: the people I care about thinking I’m a monster

MarsWritezStuff: being abandoned

JournalEnthusiast: becoming like Bill 

SmortGay: making a mistake that ruins my friends’ lives like I did before

DonutEnthusiast: …

DonutEnthusiast: i was gonna say running out of donuts but damn-

DonutEnthusiast: are you guys okay???

MarsWritezStuff: lol no

@Sleepydictionary added @GroverUnderwood , @NicoDiAngelo , @FrankZhang , and @HazelLevesque

@Sleepydictionary changed 4 names

MarsWritezStuff: Introduce yourselves guys:))

MarsWritezStuff: (The other intros are pinned)

Lorax: Uuuh ok

Lorax: I’m Grover, they/them, 20 years old, I’m a satyr

TechnicallyOld: th fuck is tha thng?

Diamonds: lnguage, Nico!

Diamonds: but also I agre, wht is this?

TeddyBear: it’s a phone I think

Lorax: yea it’s a phone

TechnicallyOld: chnge my fuckin name

MarsWritezStuff: yea yea

@Sleepydictionary changed 1 name

GrimReaper: beter

GrimReaper: im Nico, he/hm but they works to

TeddyBear: am Frank:D

TeddyBear: he/him, trans

Diamonds: Hazel, she/her

Lorax: why’re we here?

MarsWritezStuff: because my word sucks and your guys’s bring me joy

TimeMom: tf do you mean??

MarsWritezStuff: I live in a world without magic, without wonder, where everything cool and interesting is fake 

MarsWritezStuff: your guys’s universes are my escape from reality

MarsWritezStuff: I don’t have a Calamity Box, a Portal Door, a Waverider, a Camp Half-Blood, any of it

MarsWritezStuff: so I use you guys as my magical wonder, the thing that separates my life from the pain and suffering I have to deal with every fuckin day here

MarsWritezStuff: cuz humankind? Even worse in my world then it is in all of yours

MarsWritezStuff: I can’t even be myself without someone thinking i'm a freak

@Sleepydictionary has gone offline

TimeMom: that kid needs therapy