Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

You had never really felt like you belonged in regular society at all, no one really understood you or tried to understand what it was like for you. You weren’t a bad person; you just were born into an ignorant community. Despite how much you tried proving yourself to others, they always ended up giving you the cold shoulder. You had only a handful of friends at most, but you didn’t mind that part- keep your friends close and your enemies closer as whoever-the-hell in history said, but it seemed like everyone and their mother was your enemy at this point.

You have tried time and time again to explain how you have no empathy to others, and despite how mild mannered you were they still tried to view you as a monster. People also got angry at you for your lack of social skills, despite saying they would be patient and understanding, they ended up being quite the opposite anyways. It was upsetting sometimes, but you couldn’t really do anything else. In turn you felt isolated and alone from the rest of the world, and it didn’t help the way your parents acted.

That all changed one night though, when you heard what sounded like rattling coming from your window. ‘It's probably just an animal, it’ll go away.’ you thought to yourself before trying to close your eyes again, only to hear it even louder along with what sounded like human whispering. Definitely not an animal. Was it a serial killer or some sort of thief, maybe? The thought slightly excited your brain, thinking it would be a cure to your almost never-ending boredom while almost simultaneously heightening the paranoia in your body which in turn also fueled the enthusiasm you had to go and try to see whatever entered your yard at this time of night.

You sat up and slowly got onto your tippy toes, carefully wandering over to the window and peeking through your black-out curtains, making sure to only move it a little so whoever (or whatever) was outside didn’t see you as you peered at it in both a tiny bit of curiosity and a pinch of paranoia. You could feel the cold coming off of your window, chilling your hands and your nose already, all too common for a November night, you weren’t too focused on the chilliness peppering your skin though as your (E/C) eyes scanned the frosted grass outside as you attempted to search for anything out of the ordinary. What grabbed your attention first honestly sent a wave of shock down your spine though as you noticed a blue police telephone box right in your yard, illuminated only by the pale moonlight, it was almost hard to miss if it weren’t for the slight shine coming off of the paintjob… Yeah, that definitely couldn’t have grown legs and walked all the way from Britain to your home in the United States, what the hell was going on?

Your eyes quickly dashed to look at the bushes that were almost right under your window though, noticing a man who seemed to be in his twenties or early thirties based on what you were able to see due in part to just how close he was to your window and how the moon shined down at him. He didn’t seem to notice your eyes, thank god, but he did seem preoccupied on finding something… You wonder what it was, and it wouldn’t hurt to talk to this guy, right? He looked harmless enough, and if anything did go sour you could just use your pocketknife on him. You quickly grabbed said pocketknife, swiftly stuffing it inside the pocket of your gray sweatpants as you threw on a navy-blue sweater and a (f/c) jacket before slipping on some brown boots. ‘Okay, I'm ready.’ you thought to yourself, as you usually did before you left for school or for work, but this time felt different. Possibly because you were about to talk to a random guy in your yard, maybe, but this felt like more than that.

You cautiously and quietly walked over to the back door located in the kitchen, which would have given you immediate access to said yard. You made sure to tread slowly, not wanting to accidentally wake your parents up or alert the man outside just in case he was armed and dangerous. You knew to a degree what you were doing was stupid, but you just needed to satisfy that sense of boredom and inquiry within you. You just had to know why he was there.

You slowly opened the door and walked out, making sure to silently close it behind you before walking over to the bushes, the leaves on the ground crunching under the soles of your industrial boots which caused the man to immediately snap his head over to look at you. He seemed to be in a bit of shock at first, before speaking up, his voice having an evident British accent. “Care to help me look for something of mine?”.

You hesitated before nodding, still feeling a little delirious due to how you had just woken up maybe ten minutes ago, but ten minutes really did sound like a generous guess. You then slowly started to speak, having taken you a bit to come up with the right words for you to say to this stranger. “So.. Uh, What are you looking for exactly?” You tilted your head a little before brushing your (H/C) hair out of your face, your mane still messy from your slumber. Did you really wanna help him? You weren’t fully sure, but it would be too awkward to just go back inside at this point, even you recognized that.

“My um, well, sonic screwdriver!” He told you with a little urgency in this voice, then motioned to the same blue telephone booth you had seen before when you were still inside and leering from the window. “My Tardis suddenly ended up here, I think it malfunctioned, but when I went to step out of it my tardis fell out of my trench coat pocket…”

You paused for a moment after he gave you an explanation of his situation, you were too tired for this bullshit, what the hell was a tardis? Was he high on some substance you haven’t heard of yet? Whatever it was, you wanted some of it.

“Yeah, yeah… Okay… Are you high on meth?” You asked him, which caused the brunette to stand up straight immediately, seemingly offended. He was now on eye level with you, maybe a little taller.

“No, I’m not! I can assure you! I’m just…. Well, let's just say, not from around this area, yes?” He told you off a little, before grinning in hopes of seeming more friendly to you. You didn’t smile back at all though, not because you didn’t want to, but you never really smiled. You always had the same blank expression on your face no matter what really. Your voice stayed the same as well as you replied, the cold in the air starting to wake you up more. “Sure…. Well, what does this ‘Sonic Screwdriver’ look like anyways?”

You tried your best to pay attention as he began to explain what the lost object looked like; you thought his speech patterns were cute at least. “Well… It's a little dinky thing! Pretty thin, glows blue, you know! All that sort of stuff… Now, onto searching, Allons-y!”. He immediately got back onto his knees on the ground and started to look, but when you glanced at the bushes you had almost immediately found it, picking it up.

“I found it.” You declared, holding it with your dominant hand as you stared at it, insanely confused. It was like no other screwdriver you had ever seen, maybe some sort of UK exclusive? Yeah right, it looked almost… Alien.

“Ah! Thank you very much!” The stranger grinned again before snatching foreign object from you, putting it back in his pocket. Before he could do anything else, you spoke up, your curiosity only growing. “Wait… What's your name?” You decided to question first.

“Just call me the Doctor!” He told you, well that didn’t help satisfy your hunger for more info at all. “That's not really a name… But okay, What are you?” you then asked another question, seeing if whatever he said next would be less confusing.

“I’m a time lord!’ He answered like it was a normal everyday thing.

“A what?” You tilted your head, squinting your eyes as well to see if you were just hallucinating at this point.

“A time lord! Basically, when I told you ‘I'm not from around here’, I meant it literally… I’m what you would call an alien!” He explained, then motioned to what he called his Tardis earlier. “That also explains why I travel in the Tardis, instead of the usual modes of transportation you humans use!”

You just stood there in shock, you had always believed that aliens were real of course, but a part of you just thought this was some weird prank pulled on you by one of your friends. Maybe they hired some washed up theater kid that peaked in high school and yearned to be included in another acting role? “Haha… very funny…” You retorted, hoping you responded correctly to whatever weird joke this was.

“I’m not fibbing, see?” He immediately took both of your hands before putting them on his chest, it felt like you could feel two heart beats at the same time. Usually you hated physical contact, but this also felt different. He felt extra warm, almost welcoming.

“Okay... That confirmed it for me.” You stood there in shock, your hands still on his chest as he started to pull you in closer. He was hugging you now, oh shit. You only tried a little to wiggle out of his grasp, but soon accepted the hug. He felt nice, almost like a weighted blanket.

After staying like that for a few minutes, he began to pull away before speaking up. “So… While my Tardis needs repairing, is there any space open for me in your home?”. You thought about it for a few minutes before coming up with an idea in your head, almost like a lightbulb going off. “I do, but it would have to be a secret.” You told him.

This was going to be the start of something... Definitely something.

Chapter Text

It took a bit of patience to sneak The Doctor into your house, you were thankful that your parents were heavy sleepers but at the same time the back of your brain told you they could wake up any minute now, but somehow The Doctor understood the assignment despite how… goofy he seemed. He was almost as quiet as a mouse; you could barely hear his footsteps as you led him into your sleeping chamber. Eventually, you guys did manage to get to the room, and you quietly opened the door for him before entering the room after him, making sure to close the door and lock it behind you.

“We’re going to have to be quiet, okay? We can be louder tomorrow when my parents go to work.” You whispered to him, putting your finger up to your lips to signal the message to him physically as well. “For now, though… I have more questions.”. You didn’t even give him the option to say no, totally forgetting to do so on one hand and also feeling way too curious to ask permission first on the other; Thankfully he seemed totally on board and eager with answering your inquiries based on how his jovial smile came back onto his face, usually you had a hard time reading faces but his face seemed… Easier to read than others, he was way more direct than regular society, both literally and figuratively if that even made sense- Then again making sense didn’t matter right now, especially considering the fact that the events unraveling in your life right now were basically the complete opposite of making any sense.

You began to ponder on what to ask as you took off your jacket, you also turned the lights on in your bedroom. Your light of choice was semi-dim Christmas lights due to how most actual lamps made your sensory issues act up, you also had some nightlights in various parts of your room with regular lighting to help you see stuff in ‘regular color’ as you called it. Thanks to the combination of lighting, you could finally get a better look at how the Doctor looked and oh boy was he super cute in your eyes already. His hair was a little messy and a nice medium brown color, inquisitive and almost puppy-like brown eyes, bushy eyebrows with stubble on his face, a skinny build, and possibly around six foot one in height from your observations. He also wore a blue suit that was baggy around the leg area with a red tie, over the suit he wore a brown trench coat and as for footwear he donned white Chuck Taylor converse. You had never been physically attracted to someone like this before besides a few fictional characters and some guys you had seen in passing, but you pushed away those feelings for now, they weren’t really important.

“So… How old are you? Be honest.” You began your little survey, wondering if aliens even aged… That might sound stupid but hey, anything is possible at this point, so you couldn’t rule that little theory out. The Doctor seemed to giggle to himself before replying to your question, seemingly finding it comical “900! Young, I know.”. You felt a little shocked at his reply, maybe that was considered young on his planet? Oh well. “No, that is actually quite old.” You corrected him, and he shook his head a little “Oh! I was pulling your leg, I know it's old, especially to you humans... How about you? Also, I completely forgot to ask this too, what's your name?”.

You were surprised that he wanted to know your age too, you didn’t think you were as interesting as him after all, but you decided to answer anyway. “My name is (Y/N), and I’m eighteen years old”. The Doctor giggled again before replying jokingly “And you call me old!”.

You couldn’t help but laugh a little at his joke, which was rare for you, both due in part to your unique situation… Well not too unique, you knew others with either the same or similar disorders, just not in real life. Obviously, you weren’t a full-on emotionless robot like some tried to portray you; You just had a hard time showing various emotions. This was the first time in a long while someone in real life saw let alone heard you laugh. You felt a little embarrassed about your laugh actually.

You quickly snapped out of your thoughts, feeling like you were falling off the little cloud you often found yourself on in your head. "Sorry about that." You quickly apologized. "I zone out a lot and…"

"A daydreamer on our hands, hmm? No shame in that!" The Doctor quickly replied. "You don't have to apologize for that at all". You almost thought he was pulling your leg for a second, standing in silence for a few moments before you realized he was being completely serious; He was, in fact, not pulling your leg. He then began to walk around your room, scanning the many posters on the wall with his eyes then viewing the books on the bookshelf while running his fingers along the spines of them carefully. "Lover of gothic things, I see?" He asked, referring to both the posters of goth bands such as Sisters of Mercy and Christian Death on your wall as well as the gothic literature on your bookshelf. You had always loved reading classic literature, from Frankenstein to Nausea.

"Yes..." You confirmed his observation, nodding a little as well, a little embarrassed to admit it. "I also read some somewhat modern stuff… I like the Twilight series, and Taylor Swift". You weren’t fully sure how or why you were opening up to someone you had just met this fast, usually it took you a while to trust someone enough to tell them information like this, what made this guy any different? (besides his species, an honest given).

"Taylor! I love her, especially her song 'Enchanted', such a lovely little song." - You immediately felt your body start to shake as you started rocking back and forth in excitement after he said this, then responding as best as you could. "Enchanted has always been a favorite of mine too.". You quickly stopped stimming after realizing what you were doing, almost angry at yourself again.

"I like that!" The doctor said out of the blue seemingly before beginning to rock back and forth himself, testing out how it felt. "This feels nice, I get why you do it! Joyous!". You were confused at first again, but quickly accepted his behavior, and began to rock again with him. A small part of you felt overjoyed though at how quick he was to want to do everything with you, you could feel your heart start to warm up as well and beat as fast as a cheetah could run. You felt like you were on cloud 9. No one had really ever made you feel these soaring emotions, and by God you were confused.

“Anyways...” Your mind began to wonder again over to the fresh memory of him embracing you outside, but then you remembered the time as well. “We should probably go to sleep, but you can’t sleep in my bed. We definitely have a problem here.”

“Oh...! My Tardis has my bedroom in it, but I assume you want me in here in case anyone finds it?” He asked, fully aware of his predicament if anyone did in fact find it. Thankfully your parents weren’t too keen on checking the backyard often and would probably just see it as some bulky yet cute lawn decor. They weren’t the shiniest rocks in the bunch after all. You finally responded to his rhetorical question, only nodding as he quickly pointed to your closet. “I could sleep in there.” he proclaimed, opening it up to scope out the area. “Yes, this would definitely work. Just need some pillows and two blankets, we could probably use a duvet for the floor, then boom pow punch! We have ourselves a mini-sleeping quarters.”

At first you almost judged The Doctor’s choice in sleeping arrangements, but then realized it was a genius idea. Your parents didn’t really look in your closet at all, and if they suddenly barged into your bedroom your companion would be obscured by the doors. Unlike most closets, the doors didn’t feature any shutters, just plain brown oak. You could also put one of your spare nightlights in there for him. You finally decided to agree to the proposal, nodding before gathering the needed materials. The closet floor was already cleared so it was a pretty spacious area, and the clothes that were hung up didn’t hang too low to the point it would constantly be touching him. You grabbed a red duvet you seldom used and laid it down as you would a bed, but folded it once so it would fit. You then laid two pillows on the duvet then placed a spare blue blanket on it as well. It felt like you were making a nice and warm bed for the winter almost, but weirder since you were making it for your new alien friend; Not too weird considering other things you have done through but still quite out there.

The Doctor grinned when he saw his sleeping arrangements, immediately kicking his shoes off and getting under the covers. “Thank you, (Y/N), You are such a nice friend... Could you put some music on though?”. He motioned over to your black CD player that sat on top of a short shelf you used for your vast collection of CDs to which you agreed to, carefully toddling over and sifting through the jewel cases before stumbling upon your copy of the single ‘Can You Keep a Secret?’ By the Jpop singer Hikaru Utada. You decided to play that one for tonight, loading the CD into the open tray before closing it and hitting the play button. Repeat mode was on automatically, so you didn’t have to fret getting up again later and hitting play again.

You walked over to your bed, which was a twin-size mattress with black sheets and a red blanket that had some Pokémon and Pikmin plushies on it and laid down. You didn’t dare to attempt to sleep yet though, feeling uneasy with someone else in the room even if the Doctor was friendly. You found yourself thinking along with the song, with how the main chorus asked the listener; ‘Can you keep a secret?’... Could you really hide your new secret for long? Sure, you hid stuff from your parents all the time, but that was usually just various images and friends you talked to on the phone, but this was more major than that. You were hiding a literal alien in your closet after all who looked like a man in his mid to late twenties, if they found out they would probably think he was your boyfriend, and you already knew how ignorant they were on the topic of same-sex couples. You could only imagine how furious they would be… You tried not to think about the possible outcomes any more than you already were though, what you really needed to focus on was how much you had to hide him. That was the thought that eventually lulled you into a deep sleep, the only thing you could hear as you finally closed your eyes was the Doctor humming along to the song.

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You woke up the next morning to the sound of your alarm going off and the song still playing, groggily sliding off the bed and onto your feet as you hit the snooze button in a near-fit of sleepiness induced rage which was quite the norm for you. You never liked waking up, but you knew you had to.

You walked over to your closet to pick out an outfit for the day before a nice shower, almost forgetting about what (or, better described as who) was in your closet until you opened it and almost felt your heart breaking out from your chest. You calmed down when you immediately remembered the events of last night, the Doctor looking up at you with doe eyes. You almost forgot how appealing he was as well, so the way he was looking at you was a great reminder of that honestly. “Ah, Goodmorning (Y/N)!” he greeted you eagerly, almost like how someone would greet a long-time friend. “Your parents already left, I heard them leave, what's on the roster for today?”.

You stood in a deadlock for a minute, astonished that he even tried to leave the closet for that long, based on the time he had probably been awake for around three or four hours if he heard them leave. Whatever, it was still 8am, and you had chores to do. “Well, I have to clean the kitchen and do laundry.” You explained, to which he sat up on his little bed. “You mean we! You are gracious enough to let me stay with you, so of course I have to help”. You were even more flabbergasted at this point, surprised he even wanted to help, you weren’t complaining though- The more the merrier as they say, plus it would get it done faster.

“Yeah... Let's start with the laundry though, that always takes a while.” You told him before leading him to the laundry room, gleefully following you which didn’t help with the mental image you had of the Doctor that was comparable to a puppy. You entered the laundry room carefully, this weeks’ worth already in the bin, all you needed to do was separate the lights from the darks.

“So... Doctor, have you done laundry before?” You asked him curiously, to which he nodded. “Of course! How would you like me to help?” He then inquired, to which you motioned to the wash bin. “Can you get all the dark clothes and towels out?” You requested, and without missing a beat the Doctor started working on the task. You were a little surprised but then again, nothing much surprised you anymore considering the events from yesterday. You began to run the washing machine as you got the detergent and fabric softener ready, trying to make sure you were doing it right, you had a tendency to struggle with tasks relating to using machinery such as the washing machine and people seemed to never practice patience with you on it; You could recall quite a few times where your family members got enraged at you for forgetting how to use a certain function or not knowing how to even use said function. You jumped a little when you heard the Doctor start to speak up again, expecting to be just as stormy as they were.

“Oh (Y/N)! Would you like to switch tasks?” He asked you as you tried your best to calm your nerves, nodding in confusion to his offer… He wasn’t angry at you? Wow. You two quickly switched positions, now you were separating the clothes as he started up the machine, seemingly understanding the make and model immediately. Eventually you finished your task and started to put the clothes in the washing machine, then the Doctor pressed the start button. “Grand job!” He told you, holding up his right hand which caused you to flinch a little, he seemed to take note of this before speaking up. “My appy-polly-loggies, I should have said this before, but high five!” - Again, after calming your nerves, you accepted his offer and cautiously gave him a high five. Suddenly, you heard the front door open along with the sound of your father's booming voice.

"(Y/N)! I came back to get my lunch; I think I forgot it in the kitchen!" You heard him call out, causing both you and the Doctor to come to a fear-filled stop as you could feel your hands start to shake and the blood rush faster through your veins- Your heart started to beat faster than a heart from a mouse. Oh shit.

Chapter Text

You quickly tried to look around the washroom as you called back to your father, trying your best to not make your voice sound shaky. While your parents didn’t care about your wellbeing they would still say or do something if they knew something was up, basically taking any opportunity to shame you for something they deemed as ‘bad’. “It's still in the fridge!”. You hadn’t seen your father’s lunch for the day, but it was obvious where it was.

Before your father could possibly enter the room, you were in for any reason or another, you motioned to the basket of light-colored clothes. The Doctor somehow immediately understood what you wanted him to do and got in the pile of assorted garments and other various dingy fabrics, burying himself under them akin to a child hiding in a huge pile of fallen leaves. You turned your head to the door in anticipation, listening in on the footsteps coming from the kitchen.

Eventually your father did leave, and you felt relieved that your father was so much in a hurry that he couldn’t stop to passive aggressively criticize you that day. Once you made out the sound of the front door opening and slamming close again you finally let out an exhale you had been holding in and closed your eyes to collect yourself. You really did loathe your parents, and you weren’t fully sure why, you had never felt a connection with them ever since you were little. Sure, they were awful and you used that as a reason, but you also noticed other people your age who were in similar situations who still loved their parents somehow. Whatever, you didn’t want to dwell on that topic right now.

The Doctor had come out from his hiding place after waiting for the sound of your Father’s car pulling out of the driveway, hugging you from behind which caused you to let out a shocked gasp. “That was so-so-so scary (Y/N)!” He proclaimed to you, closing his eyes as he rested his head on top of yours. Thoughts of pushing him off of you and to the floor immediately popped into that head of yours, but you didn’t do it. You didn’t have morals, but you knew that they were there, you had to basically memorize them from a young age after all.

He eventually pulled himself off of you, a grin on his face now, calming down from the near heart(s?) attack he had earlier. “Thanks for letting me give you hugs by the way (Y/N)! I love how us men can show platonic affection to each other.”

Yeah, platonic.

Platonic.

“Yeah, no problem...” You replied before looking at the washing machine, then at the clothes again. “We can come back later to wash the light clothes, it’ll take us a while anyways.” you told the Doctor before walking to the kitchen, him walking in the same trail as you as you heard his voice, showing that he understood. “Of course! In the meantime, we can eat breakfast then clean the kitchen, that sounds good to you?”. You could only bob your head in reply, surprised that he was taking the initiative to schedule out your morning. Hey, having a new alien companion really did come in handy.

After you started to cook breakfast, with some help from the Doctor of course, you two began to eat the meals on your respective plates. The two of you had made scrambled eggs and bacon together, faux eggs and faux bacon of course, since you did tend to stick to a vegan diet.

“I can’t believe it’s not real meat! Wow!” The doctor said with a mouthful of food, usually something of that nature would be absolutely horrid to you, but of course your mind kept insisting it was cute. God damn it, brain, curse you. You let out a small hum as your only response, continuing to eat as the Doctor continued to ramble about how creative humans were. That's when you heard the home phone ring, immediately causing you to get up from your zoned out state at the table and walk over to answer it.

Immediately when you answered the call, you heard a familiar voice from the other end. “Greetings, droog.” A boy around your age exclaimed, it was your close friend Alex. Alex had moved to the states after being exiled from his hometown in the UK and initially the two of you had bonded over your love of goth and classical music; Although eventually started bonding over the fact that you both had ASPD. Alex had a tendency to act on his urges, you on the other hand did not have the same energetic drive as him, so you just shared ideas of cruel pranks to him. Your friendship did go deeper than just that though.

“Goodmorning, Alex.” You replied to his greeting, the Doctor watching you talk on the phone with both curiosity and a little bit of confusion. “How are you doing today?”

“Better than you, most likely malchik. You should come to my house. I'm having a real horror show of a time reading this one book you told me about… Haunted.” He expressed his excitement over the newest book recommendation you had given him, and for a second you were tempted to agree to his offer, but then you realized you had to stay home. Not just because of the doctor, but your parents were never too keen on you hanging out with any friends. “Sorry Alex, I can’t. Too busy today.”.

“I call cal, your em and pee never want you to come over.” Alex huffed, and you could almost hear the pout on his face right now. You always thought Alex was attractive, both appearance wise and attitude wise. “I know, but I really do have some chores to do, if anything I can stop by tomorrow.” You promised. “I’ll bring my copy of my Cocteau Twins CD, or even my Beethoven CD.”

“I do quite love the old Ludwig Van… Deal, but wear your best platties, don’t want you looking like a shoot do we?” Alex instructed, to which you started brainstorming outfit ideas. “Sure, I might bring a friend as well, is that alright?”

“Of course, the more droogs the better. See you then.” is the last sentence you heard come from Alex before the ringing sound of a disconnected phone filled your ears, you placed the phone back where it belonged and started making your way back over to the table where the Doctor was still seated.

“Who was that? Your romantic companion?” The Doctor asked jokingly, noticed the way your face flushed while you were on the phone and the way your footsteps on your way back from the phone looked light and airy. “Oh, Oh no, just a friend… I might like him in that way though.” You decided to be honest, you had known Alex for around two or three years now and the anniversary of your friendship was coming up in December. You were a little excited, the playful bastard meant a lot to you after all. “Why don’t you tell him?” The Doctor asked, seeming quite puzzled for some reason. “I’m not the type to tell someone I like them first.” You sighed, you had always been that way for some reason, something about confessing first just wasn’t something you fancied; But hey, you wouldn’t fully know anyways. “Well, has anyone ever confessed to you?” The Doctor then asked.

You thought about it for a minute, trying to recall any memory that might confirm if anyone has in fact confessed to you, but you honestly couldn’t recall any. Damn. “No, not.. Exactly.”. The Doctor gave you a small grin and then replied. “Well don’t lose hope! I’m sure you’ll get him, right? Do you know if he likes you or not?”

“I mean, most likely, he always wants me to come over and basically spams my messages every day, but not in the same way my other friends do. He is very clingy and always wants to be holding my hand or something as well...” You started to dwell on it, you were never good at picking up romantic cues, but with Alex it was too hard not to notice now that you were actively processing it. “Well, that settles it!” The Doctor grinned even more, showing off those dimples of his… if he had a tail it would be wagging extra fast right now. “He does like you!”.

After you both finished eating you put the dishes in the dishwasher, the Doctor beginning to run it for you as well. You kept dwelling on the fact that Alex had a crush on you, it made so much sense now how much he was obsessed with you. He practically hissed at any other guy that tried to go near you even, not girls though, he didn’t have to worry about competing with them due to your sexuality (he did still get jealous over your platonic friends though, and some of them are girls). Maybe you should confess to him first? No, no, no. You were gonna wait; Even considering the fact that he did like you, you still weren’t the type of guy to confess first, you were just gonna wait this out and see how tomorrow goes… Especially due to the sound of the call, how he wanted you to wear your best clothes, maybe he was going to confess tomorrow?

As you kept processing the situation in your head, the Doctor snapped you out of your thoughts, his voice sounding louder than usual due to how hard you had been stuck in your head. “(Y/N)! I’m gonna sweep the floor, okay? Would you like to sweep the floors as I do that?”. It took you a few seconds to reply, your head still falling down from the cloud you had been on. “Oh, uh, sure.”

As you got the broom out for him, you also got a washcloth and some cleaning spray along with disinfectant spray. You began to spray and wipe down the counter after setting your little cleaning area up, listening to the sound of the broom against the white linoleum floors. This was gonna be a long day now, you could tell, feeling anxious over tomorrow already.

“So (Y/N)..” The Doctor began to speak again. “What is your favorite childhood memory?” He asked curiously. You could only shrug, which gave the Doctor a small idea based on how he leaned the broom against the wall and started to come closer to you. “I have a trick to show you, if that's alright!”.
You could only snicker as you replied smartly. “What, is it a weird alien power of yours?” you inquired, now leaning against the counter.

“Essentially, yes! We can share memories.” He explained to you. “I just need to put my hands on your face, is that alright with you?”. Immediately, a spike of anxiety began to rush through your veins. You remembered the actions you committed when you were younger and didn’t try to mask your ASPD at all; You hated masking, but you also remembered how often you were brutally punished for actions you committed that you didn’t understand were ‘morally wrong’ according to mainstream society, such as punching your peers at school or saying crude words to them. No adult in your life even cared to explain these odd and foreign societal morals to you, defaulting to either berating you with harsh words or physically hurting you as well which only normalized your violence in your head. After all, if they hit you, that meant you hitting others was okay. You did eventually memorize these morals pushed on you by society, but you saw it more as a math equation. Sure, you had to follow them, but you didn’t fully care for them nor understand them fully. You knew there was a huge chance if the Doctor saw these memories, he would see you as some ‘monster’. People tended to demonize your disorder despite your inability to control it. You couldn’t say no to him either though, it would most likely seem suspicious, at least that's how you viewed it.

“Yeah, sure...” You replied after hesitating to say anything for a few moments, your eyes focusing on the white floor. You felt too ashamed to even look at him, fearing his potential negative reaction. He placed his hands on both sides of your face, his palms feeling very warm and welcoming, you had never felt this warm before really.

Suddenly like a flash of lightning you began to see most if not all of the Doctor’s memories, All his past adventures, his past emotions, his past companions, and more. You saw every time he laughed, every time he cried, every time he felt angry, every time he felt afraid, and more. You couldn’t even think about your own memories you were afraid to share at this point, too overwhelmed with all of this new information. How would you even remember half of this stuff? You already had a hard time remembering things you do every day, your brain storage started to feel all full.

After a few moments that felt almost like a whole one hundred years, the Doctor pulled his hand away and you started to anticipate his reply with a slight sense of year; What he did say though just shocked you. “They shouldn’t have treated you that way (Y/N), I'm sorry.”. His facial expression seemed angry, his eyebrows furrowed and a scowl on his face.

“So… Just to be clear, you are fine with me having a lack of empathy and no understanding of morals?” you asked him to double check, honestly shocked that he was on your side. “Of course, it's what makes you unique! You wouldn’t be you without those features after all, and I like you!” He explained. “Plus you can’t control those parts of you, I have met many people across all centuries and galaxies with similar situations to yours. While most people might not understand, and while I might not fully understand either since I don’t have what you have, I am always here for you. Okay (Y/N)?”
You could only nod in reply, still feeling a sense of disbelief that he supported you. You had friends who deeply supported you, sure, but this was the first time anyone in real life besides Alex fully stated his support of you. You mainly had friends who lived in other states, due to how your state was filled with ignorant mother-truckers who would gladly take any chance to disrespect you and your disorders. You were thankful that he understood, and thankful was really an understatement. You almost felt like you could kiss him.

“Good, now let's finish cleaning the kitchen! Then maybe we could listen to some more music in your room later, right?”

Chapter Text

You had woken up the next morning after a long day of doing chores and various other activities with the Doctor before your parents came home, it was still in the early hours of the morning as well. You had to decide on an outfit for today, something you had completely forgotten to do yesterday, you quickly got up and walked to the closet, opening the door.

You were a little surprised due to how the Doctor was already up, he was probably more of a morning person due to how he was the one who also woke up first yesterday, but 5am seemed a little absurd to you… Despite the fact that you were also up at this hour. “Oh! Good morning (Y/N), going to see your boyfriend today?” He asked playfully, to which you only groaned. “He isn’t my boyfriend… Yet, I already told you that, and yes. You are coming with me as well, so after my parents leave in about an hour go get some clothes from the Tardis or something.” You told him, not even giving the Doctor a choice in the matter, you didn’t want to risk the possibility of anyone finding him when you weren’t home if your father or mother forgot something or had to check on something.

“Alright! May I help you pick out a nice outfit?” He asked you, causing you to think about it for a minute before nodding in agreement. The Doctor immediately got up and began to sift through the clothes in your closet, moving hanger upon hanger, before he picked out the first piece of your outfit which was a black sweater with a skeleton design on it. He placed the sweater on your bed before pulling out black boot-cut jeans. You couldn’t even lie, the outfit he picked was pretty good and exactly your usual style. “Thanks, Doc.” You told him, deciding quickly on the nickname you would give him.

“Doc? Oh! Thank you.” The Doctor grinned at you. “But I'm not done, we need to accessorize of course. An outfit isn’t complete without its accessories after all.”. You knew he was right, and your subconscious was telling you to look your best today due to the obvious situation you were in. The Doctor quickly picked a black trenchcoat for you to wear over the sweater then wandered over to your bedside table, opening the single drawer that was right under the main surface of the table then picked out a silver belt loop chain along with a silver chain necklace to match.

“There, viola! An outfit for you.” The Doctor laid everything out on the bed for you, you felt pretty impressed with what he selected as well due to how good it all looked together; It didn’t feel like you were trying to be too fancy, but not quite fully casual either like most of your outfits. You would have to take notes for later outfits.

Once you heard your parent’s car pull out of the driveway you thanked the Doctor again then rushed to the shower. After locking the door behind you began to undress for the shower, thoughts racing through your mind about what the day would bring. Alex told you to dress nicely after all, but didn’t really tell you what you guys would be doing today; Was he really going to confess to you? And how would you explain the Doctor being there? Cousin maybe? No, he looked too old to be considered your cousin, and you know Alex would quiz you on how you know him… Would he even believe you if you decided to tell the truth about him coming from a police telephone box that fell into your yard essentially? Whatever, you always had a tendency to either have a lack of thinking or completely just overthinking, there was no in-between.

After getting naked and staring at yourself in the mirror for around five minutes, you finally started to run the shower and check the temperature before hopping in. You began to wet your hair first as you tried to let your mind and soul calm down, attempting to not to stress yourself out over the thought of the Doctor being captured by the government or something due to being an alien; Would that even happen? You weren’t sure, you were mainly remembering what you saw in the very few movies you saw about aliens where the alien was always the hero, and the government was trying to capture it. You weren’t even sure why you were so afraid either, you had only known the Doctor for a little over a day now, but you felt infatuated with him- But it was whatever, you had Alex after all and someone as cool as the Doctor probably wouldn’t like someone like you even if you tried to flirt with him like Alex did to you to get you to like him more. You began to carefully rub shampoo into your scalp wanting your hair to be nice and clean, you stared at the wall as you made sure to lather it nice and evenly, still stuck in your own thoughts as you kept cleaning.

‘I really hope Alex does confess today’ is one of the first things that came to mind after you got rid of your anxiety relating to the Doctor. You never were one for waiting and knowing the 98% likelihood of Alex having a romantic interest in you just made that hatred of waiting even worse. He had plenty of good times to confess to you, so why didn’t he do it yet? You thought he was probably anxious, but Alex having anxiety is a very rare thing- If you recall correctly, you had never even seen an anxious Alex before. You had seen him angry to the point of his face being red and upset to the point of him being in tears, but anxiety? No, never, not in a million years.

After running your shampoo-covered hair under the water to rinse it out, you began to put a little conditioner on the surface of your hair, making sure to keep it away from your scalp. You always took care in washing your (H/C) hair whenever you showered, taking great pride in how it looked. The rest of your body though, you weren’t really a fan of. You must have looked attractive enough though for someone as judgmental of others as Alex to like you, you felt so apologetic to no one in particular, all you could think about was Alex and you could only say sorry to whoever was listening in on those thoughts of yours… Could the Doctor read minds? Well, if he can share/exchange memories like he did yesterday, maybe, but you didn’t want to assume anything.

After your hair and your whole body were cleaned at least twice, you got out of the shower, wrapping a towel around your body before using a smaller hair towel to ruffle your hair to at least a semi-dry state before beginning to brush your teeth. You usually forgot to brush your teeth, while most people brush twice a day you ended up brushing them once every other day at most if it was a good week, you made sure to remember to brush them today though since Alex had a tendency to point out every little thing about your appearance; You weren’t sure if it was meant to be a complement or not half the time, but you didn’t want to risk it. After spitting, rinsing, washing your face with cleanser, then moisturizing your face you left the bathroom and began the walk to your bedroom.

As you took the short walk to your room, your eyes wandered to the living room that peeked out from the end of the hallway. It was an open room with pale yellow walls and white shag carpeting, decorated with various different things that both your father and your mother liked along with a brown oak tv stand that had a tv on the surface and various VHS tapes and DVDs under it. The house felt almost empty, stuck in time without the bickering coming from your chatty parents. You were nothing like them, being more on the quiet side, but also unlike them in various different ways. They tried making you watch only PG movies and listen only to PG music, despite being eighteen, but you always managed to sneak gorey movies and violent music into your regular media consumption; It was easy after all, they never truly cared to even try to learn more about you, they saw you as ‘defective’ after all. They also always tried forcing you to be more social towards people, even those who obviously whispered and giggled at how ‘strange’ you were, your parents would also laugh at you as well. People always say their first bullies were their parents, and that is sadly true for your situation as well. Whatever, it didn’t really matter in your eyes, it was just another annoyance.

When you walked into your room you saw the Doctor changing into his outfit for the day, you let out a gasp and quickly apologized, feeling your heart beating even faster. Holy shit, you didn’t mean to walk on him changing… He did have a cute body figure though. You quickly grabbed your clothes for the day and rushed to the living room, deciding to change there instead, no one else was home after all and you were too stunned at what just occurred to even think about going back into the bathroom. You quickly pulled on your clothes for the day right before the Doctor left the room, now dressed in a brown suit with cream-colored pinstripes, a blue tie, and his usual white converse. A smile was on his face despite what happened.

“Howdy-Ho, (Y/N)!” He greeted you happily. “Oh wow! Your outfit looks great, handsome if I do say so myself.” - You stood there silent for a few seconds before speaking up again. “Sorry about walking in like that, I didn’t know you would be changing-” “It’s okay! We’re both men.” He interrupted quickly, dismissing what happened. “Yeah but-” “We’re going to be late! I got your bag ready with the CDs and such you’ll need today!”. He handed you your bag, then quickly retrieved your shoes for you, which were just your black industrial combat boots. You quickly put on the boots and then the bag before walking to the door with the doctor, opening it for him. “Allons-y!” he proclaimed excitedly before walking out of the front door.

The two of you began your short walk to Alex’s house after you had locked the door behind you, trying to arrive as quick as you could. “So, what is this Alex fellow like?” The doctor asked you curiously, walking beside you on the inside of the sidewalk. “Well, he’s violent for sure and crude.” You responded, beginning to ramble. “He also has ASPD, but he doesn’t have autism like I do… I think he knows about my autism though, I'm pretty sure. He likes wearing makeup, especially false eyelashes, and has a pretty head of hair.”. The Doctor listened in carefully to every word you said, his face almost blank and hard to read which was pretty unusual for him so far. “Ah, sorry, I probably sound annoying right now.” You quickly apologized, causing him to interject. “No! No no no, I was just paying attention. I like when you talk, you have a nice voice I could listen to for hours!”. You almost blushed at what he said but didn’t and only let out a quiet ‘thank you’ as the two of you continued walking. The walk was pretty short, only being about two minutes away on foot. Once you arrived at the brown house you walked up to the red door and knocked on it before stepping back, the Doctor staring at the door with a sense of curiosity and wonder on his face. After a few seconds the apple of your eye opened the door.

Alex, also in a completely black outfit, quickly moved out of the way without a word to let the two of you in. You walked in first since you already knew the basic layout of the house from how often he made you come over. “Hi hi hi, (Y/N).” Alex finally greeted you after closing the door, giving you a cat-like grin before pulling you into a tight hug to which you reciprocated. Alex never asked for his hugs, he just took, fitting for the type of person he is. The Doctor watched two of you hug curiously with a grin on his face, but that grin seemingly faded when Alex looked at him which you found strange. You knew Alex was possessive, but would he really be mean to a guest you brought? You should have known better. “Oh, I completely forgot to tell you this...” You spoke as you pulled away from the hug. “This is the Doctor; he is a new friend of mine.”.

“Is that really this chelloveck's name?” Alex inquired with almost a hiss in his voice, you almost felt yourself panic for a second before thinking of a good reply, ‘Well, the Doctor is also from England, and you know how you had a friend named Dim? It's like that.”. The Doctor just nodded to ‘confirm’ what you said before he spoke as well, giving his two cents in. “Exactly what (Y/N) said!”.

Alex nodded, accepting what you said as the truth. He always believed in you no matter what, even if you did twist the truth and sprinkle in little white lies sometimes just to see how gullible he was. Thankfully this time, like the other times, worked; The only difference was that this fib was actually necessary. “So, you droogs brought some deng right?” He then asked the two of you, and you only nodded. “Of course, about seventy or so.” You told him, which caused Alex to grin. “Let's yeckate to town, then, shall we?”. Both you and the Doctor nodded to Alex’s offer, of course none of you could drive; When Alex fled England he couldn’t get a license in the states, partially due to his criminal status, so the three of you would be taking the bus. Both you and Alex had bus passes, and as for the Doctor you didn’t mind buying him a bus ticket.

The three of you walked to the bus stop, which was only a minute away, during the whole walk all three of you were silent. Alex grabbed onto your arm affectionately as the three of you walked, leaning his head against you. The Doctor’s gaze seemed to linger on the two of you at this display of PDA, the same blank expression as before covering his face. A few different times you also caught Alex glaring at the Doctor, to which you would quickly stop him by distracting him by pulling him closer sweetly. You could feel Alex’s heart beat faster every time you did this. The three of you stopped when you had finally arrived at the bus stop, a few other people waiting. You didn’t pay attention to the other people though, as they didn’t really matter to you.

“So, Doctor.” Alex began to speak up, a playful tone in his voice. “Is your eemya the truth? What do you even study?”.

The Doctor quickly retorted, his hands now in his trench coat pockets. “History and Astronomy, my two favorite topics.”.

“Those topics, to me at least, are quite chepooka; Have you even made any pretty polly? Have you even a cent in your life?” Alex covered his mouth with one of his hands, beginning to giggle to himself like a schoolgirl during health class.

“I don’t think that's any of your concern, Alex.” The Doctor reprimanded him, or at least tried to.

Alex was about to say a quick comeback, but you quickly interrupted the two’s squabble. “That's enough, you two, we’ll get kicked off the bus if this argument escalates at all.” The Doctor grinned and said nothing as Alex huffed, a pout coming onto his face, but accepting what you said. “Fine fine fine.”. The Bus quickly arrived after you dissolved the dispute, the three of you quickly getting on. You and Alex showed the driver your passes and then you paid for the Doctor’s bus ticket, which caused Alex to glare at you a little but you ignored it. Alex was gonna be Alex, after all.

You all sat on the back of the bus, the Doctor and Alex on either side of you. Alex leaned his head on your shoulder and closed his eyes as the bus began to move after everyone had got on, breathing in and out slowly. Oddly enough, The Doctor tried to do the same thing, but you didn’t stop him at all. You saw nothing wrong with this sort of affection, and thought the Doctor was just tired too and needed to rest his head somewhere that wasn’t against the uncomfortable window.

It only took about fifteen minutes to get to the nearby town called Bristol. Bristol was a quaint little town, but both you and Alex saw it as the shopping hot spot, especially lighting up during the late fall and winter months. The town had quite a few thrift stores and small businesses, making it easy to buy practically anything here from physical media to clothes. You also were on a small mission today, you knew you wanted to buy Alex something nice for Christmas, and you wanted to do it today since it was one of the few times you really were able to get out of your house without your parents looming over you like a military helicopter surrounding someone on the FBI’s most wanted list.

You were ripped out of your thoughts when you heard Alex’s voice pierce right through your eardrums. “(Y/N)! We’ve arrived!” You heard him shout excitedly, which caused both you and the Doctor to get up from your seats as you began to follow a hyper Alex off the bus. You were on what Alex liked to call the ‘jeezny’ of the city due to how loud and bustling it was during most of the day, and while you had a dislike for most people you did like this street since it did have the most stores; Plus, it wasn’t like New York busy, just small town busy.

The Three of you walked to a random little video shop first, Alex guiding almost like a tour guide. While you already knew this town pretty well Alex always led the way, being the most social out of you two. The Doctor looked at all the sights in amazement, a child-like wonder in his eyes; You would assume someone like him, who has gone on countless adventures for centuries now, would be less amazed at a typical American town like this one but you’d be dead wrong… Something about that just made him more interesting to you though. You walked into the store with the other two and immediately went to the horror section, seeing racks on racks of various VHS tapes and DVDs for a cheap price compared to other stores. All of these copies were pre-owned yet in great condition, you sifted through each sub-section of the shelves before ending up at the slasher category. You typically stuck to extra gorey and psychological, but you couldn’t deny your craving for a good slasher flick that had been eating away at your brain today. After looking through the contents of the section for a good minute or two, you quickly decided on the 1974 film ‘Black Christmas’.

The Doctor walked over to you, looking down at the VHS that was in your hands. “Oh! What's that movie (Y/N)?” he asked curiously, looking at the cover printed on the cardboard sleeve. “It's Black Christmas, a pretty classic slasher movie. It came out before Halloween and is the inspiration for the movie too.” You quickly told the doctor, delighted to explain. “Oh! Interesting, I haven’t seen it yet!”. You almost offered to buy the Doctor a movie, but weren’t fully sure he wanted one, so you didn’t. You walked over to the counter and quickly paid for the movie before stuffing the video cassette into your bag. Alex had paid before you and quickly walked over, excitedly showing you what he got. “Benny’s video, huh?” You raised your brow, you have probably watched that movie more times than a mouse’s heart could beat in a minute. Alex only nodded, pretty proud of his selection as he awaited to hear your opinion. “That's a pretty good one… Would you wanna watch Black Christmas tonight?” you then inquired, and Alex immediately accepted your suggestion with a grin and a nod.

The Doctor peaked at the VHS Alex held in his hands before looking at the two of you, a smile still on his soft-looking face. “You two like pretty gruesome cinema, huh?” he asked with obvious interest in his voice, unlike the judgment you were used to from others for liking this kind of stuff. You were about to smile at the Doctor’s comment before Alex responded, scoffing to himself. “Of course, you bratchny. Me and (Y/N) aren’t tots anymore but obviously a ded like you wouldn’t follow what youth like today.” He snarled at the other man, which caused the Doctor’s smile to fade away and morph into a slight frown. You shot Alex the best glare you could give which caused him to give a quiet half-baked apology, and while the Doctor seemed hesitant, he quickly forgave Alex.

You and your companions quickly left the store, the tension that was present at the bus stop quickly coming back as neither Alex nor the Doctor talked at all. You were as silent as them too before you noticed a new store a few footsteps away from the video store entrance, it was a small vintage thrift store. “Guys, that place looks neat.” You quickly pointed to the store, breaking the silence. The two agreed before you all unanimously began to walk to the store, not giving it much thought. The three of you quickly separated to look at whatever interested you individually… Personally, you were on the hunt for the perfect Christmas gift for Alex.

Your mind began to wander again as you wandered through the isle of random assortments of necklaces, lockets, and more. Would Alex like whatever you picked out? Most likely, but you couldn’t help it, you were nervous he wouldn’t. You weren’t even fully sure why you cared so much about Alex’s opinion, you had a tendency to ignore others' opinions on you, but because he could be your potential boyfriend you felt a little bit self-conscious about how he views you. It was disturbing, almost like the terror a child would feel watching the guinea pig movie series. Eventually, your eyes landed on two items that almost matched each other quite well; A golden and dainty heart-shaped locket and a golden pocket watch, both only five dollars each and having both the same chain and the same shade of gold. You held both of them up and started to feel the tiny, almost delicate rose details on the locket before looking at the roman numerals on the pocket watch. It was like they were both calling your name.

After realizing that these were the two you were looking for, you rushed to the counter and paid for the two items before Alex could see, the cashier putting the two items in a little bag to keep them safe before carefully stuffing it into your own bag. It was almost like you were timed, right after you moved to the side Alex strutted over. “Find anything that caught your glazz?” he asked, you could only shake your head no in response. “Me neither, maybe next time.”.

The Doctor came out from the isle he was in, holding a brass statue of a dog. Before Alex could say anything, you spoke up quickly, your voice almost cracking. “I’ll get that for you, doccy.” you told him before carefully taking the statue from his hands and paying for it, Alex glaring at both you and the Doctor. It's whatever though, he can stay angry in your head, the Doctor deserves to get something today too. The Doctor thanked you, his voice quiet but obviously overjoyed as he watched you pay for the item with a happy gleam from his eyes. After you paid for the item and the cashier put it in a bag, you handed off the bag to the Doctor.

“Alright, lets gooly to the cafe... I want a chasha of coffee and something to eat.” Alex told the two of you and the Doctor nodded, which seemed to make Alex’s mood worsen. “You’re just here to mooch off of (Y/N)’s pretty penny, huh? you sodding sloopy scoteena.” He hissed at the Doctor again, just like earlier. “Alex, just shut up.” Is all you said before you took both his and the Doctor’s hands and led them to your favorite cafe. You were seriously starting to grow frustrated at Alex, it was annoying how much he tried picking a fight with the Doctor and not the good kind of annoying either. If you had to hear an aggressive comment from him again, passive or obvious, you were going to lose it; Almost like an angry bull seeing red.

You quickly found a table with three seats and sat both the Doctor and Alex down before seating yourself down, picking up the menu as an employee walked over before speaking up. “I’ll have a black coffee and a chocolate chip cookie please.” You then motioned to the Doctor. “He’ll have a hot chocolate and a cinnamon scone”. You then nodded your head over to Alex. “Then he’ll have a latte with extra milk and a cake pop.”.

The employee stared at you in surprise, shocked you decided what to order that quickly, but wrote it down before heading to the back of the counter again. You put the menu down before staring out the window next to your seat, trying to calm down as best as you could as you softly breathed in and out through your nose. Time seemed to slow down again, which meant whatever kind of meditation you were doing was a success, thank the lord. You began to think deeply about how the day was going so far, with Alex being himself. While you were thinking you subconsciously began bouncing one of your legs, which was one of your many stims, when you felt a tap on your shoulder which brought you back to reality.

Alex was the one tapping, and when he noticed your attention was on him now, he whispered to you. “(Y/N), stop.” is all he said without elaborating and you did, maybe some other customer filed a complaint? You weren’t sure and didn’t really care enough to want to know, but you did stop. You already heard enough bickering and complaining today and didn’t want to hear more of it. After a few more minutes of waiting in silence besides the background noise from other tables your drinks and bakery food had arrived, the Doctor immediately started to drink his hot chocolate and eat his scone excitedly. Alex side eyed the Doctor before beginning to sip on his own latte. You ate your cookie carefully before starting to drink your order of a black coffee, you liked doing things one at a time after all like a step-by-step procedure and these were one of those things. You used to dip your cookie in your coffee, but Alex didn’t like that for whatever reason but somehow still found your procedure of eating things in order weird too, maybe he just never saw anyone do that before.

“So (Y/N), what are we doing after this?” The Doctor asked you excitedly, despite how rude Alex was being towards him the entire time he was still enjoying the day out with you somehow despite how upset he seemed to get every time he got put down. You thought about it for a minute before remembering what you had said to Alex earlier. “We might hit a few more shops then go back to Alex’s house to watch Black Christmas.” is what you responded with, feeling yourself grow more and more excited each second at the thought of watching it with Alex and the Doctor. “When we get to my home, we might need to have a talk (Y/N), it will be quite the horrorshow.” Alex then told you, placing his hand on your shoulder with a grin on his face. He didn’t seem angry about the Doctor right now; but then again, he was quite good at hiding his emotions and manipulating people into a false sense of safety… so what could this talk be about? Your heart began to almost pound out from your chest, you were both quite excited yet nervous to find out what Alex wanted to discuss with you about later on.

Chapter Text

After you had paid for the drinks and snacks the three of you had hit a few more stores before heading back to Alex’s house, you had just gotten to his house and were in the process of relaxing before watching the movie. The tension from earlier was still there but not as bad, Alex hadn’t said anything to the Doctor since earlier as far as you knew.

“So, (Y/N).” Alex began to speak after sitting down on the black couch with a mustard yellow throw blanket on it and red cushions. “Pop in the tape”. You nodded and carefully got it out of your bag, then walked over to his TV and turned it on before popping it into the VHS player. The Doctor sat on the floor near the television, obviously not wanting to sit next to or anywhere near Alex at all. Before you could press play you heard Alex’s voice again, he seemed jittery which was pretty unusual for him as well. “I’m going to go get a chasha of moloko.” is all that he said before he got up and rushed to the kitchen, his black dress shoes clicking and clacking against the dark hardwood floors. Alex’s obsession with drinking plain white milk had been obvious since the day you two met, he had at least three or four glasses a day- yet when it came to your habits of repeating certain meals, he had a tendency to make weird comments. It was whatever though, he had a tendency to be childish, maybe he just didn’t understand. You didn’t really expect him to.

You sat down on the couch, right next to where Alex was sitting before, and looked over to the Doctor as you asked him a question. “So, how was your day today? Did you have fun?”. The Doctor turned to face you from where he was and was silent for a moment, a blank expression on his face before a sudden smile creeped up onto him. “It was fun! You are quite fun to be around (Y/N)!”. You only nodded, the way he was silent and almost emotionless before replying really struck a chord with you for some reason, you knew to a degree that he was probably upset due to Alex’s behavior, but you didn’t fully understand why; You had a hard time understanding why people get upset often. You had a tendency to ignore things that would make most people upset or just make fun of it, but when you did get upset it was quite messy. The Doctor snapped his head back to face the TV once Alex walked back into the room with his tall glass of milk, gingerly placing it on the table next to the couch before sitting back down. You used the VHS player remote to press play as Alex wrapped an arm around you, almost as tight as a snake wrapping around its victim's neck to kill it. The three of you kept your eyes glued to the screen, almost in complete silence besides the noise of the clock coming from the wall, the quiet ticks and tocks loud in your ears. Usually you hated the noise, but it almost was comforting to you in this moment. Something in your brain was telling you that you’d rather be sitting next to the Doctor on the floor, but you ignored it, maybe you were just overheated due to how warm Alex’s physical contact was? Alex was obviously very touchy and had a tendency to touch you without asking and while most times you didn’t mind, he also would ignore your requests for him to stop touching you whenever you were having a sensory overload. You just summed it up to his personality.

You kept your eyes on the screen, watching all the sorority girls in the movie celebrate Christmas. That only reminded you again how close Christmas was, with Thanksgiving only being next week. You wondered if the Doctor ever celebrated Christmas or any other holidays- he must have, right? You cannot just spend several centuries on earth and not celebrate anything even just once out of sheer curiosity. Did he ever feel alone on the holidays? Was anyone waiting for him to come home for this festive season? The thoughts rushed through your mind, you wanted to include the Doctor in the holiday season somehow, but it would be hard due to your parents. You could probably find a way though, you always managed to find a way to sneak stuff past their not-so-watchful eye; They were pretty bad at thinking critically, only thinking about themselves and other things. You sometimes feel like they only had you to fix their marriage, but obviously babies don’t fix marriages; If anything they make them more complicated, but people tend to not focus on that in favor of listening to their baby fever.

You continued to multitask between watching the movie and thinking before you felt Alex get up from his seat, tapping your shoulder. You guys were only halfway before the movie and after snapping out of your thoughts you almost asked why he was getting up, but then you remembered what he said at the cafe… Oh yeah, Alex wanted to talk to you.

Alex wanted to talk to you.

You quietly got up and notified the doctor that you were going somewhere else in the house, but he seemed too preoccupied watching the screen. Alex seemed to get a little bit pissy that you were telling the Doctor about your short absence, but then dismissed it as you followed Alex outside. There was a chill in the air and the sun was almost finished setting, it was probably about 5pm. You pulled your trench coat around you more in an attempt to shield yourself from the cold as you stood on the backyard porch. When he noticed you were cold though, Alex started to pull you close to him, your (E/C) eyes meeting his piercing blue ones hesitantly as you almost started shaking. He brought your hands to his fluffy light-brown hair for you to feel it, a smile coming upon his lips. This smile, instead of the usual mischievous and playful grin he wore with pride, was one of genuine happiness.

You watched his lips carefully, time seeming to slow, even his lips almost going in slow motion. “I love you, (Y/N).” Is what he said, and despite how quiet he was you heard each and every word clearly. Something felt wrong about this though, you still couldn’t put your finger on it. You loved Alex, sure, and you wanted this but… Why did it feel so wrong? Whatever! you kissed him, nonetheless. He kissed you back happily, his hands in your hair as well before you two pulled away after a few seconds.

From the corner of your eye in the kitchen window, you could have sworn you saw the Doctor staring out at you two from the other side of the window but once you turned to look at him it seems as though he scurried away. Whatever, you were probably just hallucinating, this whole situation felt unreal after all. You finally secured yourself a boyfriend in Alex and you finally had another real-life friend in the Doctor. Alex didn’t like the Doctor though.

After a few more minutes of kissing and whispering loving words to each other, the two of you walked back into the house, your hand holding his hand. The movie was almost over by this point, maybe you had been outside for longer than you had imagined. The Doctor looked up at you two from his spot on the floor, grinning at the two of you. “(Y/N)! Alex! This movie is so good, we should have another movie night sometime soon.”. Alex only flashed his signature grin and nodded before crossing his arms “Yes we shall.”. Alex must have been in a really good mood for him to not respond crudely to the Doctor, which you were pretty happy about.

Once the movie was over, you said farewell to Alex and gave him a goodbye kiss before you left the house with the Doctor. You had your bag, and the Doctor had his shopping bag with the little brass dog statue. The walk home was filled with way much more talking than beforehand, with Alex not with you two and all. “So, I assume he confessed.” The Doctor said with a smile on his face, and you nodded. “He did, yes.”. The fresh memory of how it occurred replayed in your mind, the feeling of his lips on yours replayed too. A blush crept onto your face as well, but you summed it up to the cold nipping at your skin. “Well, that Alex really is a nightmare dressed like a daydream.” is what the Doctor responded with, which perplexed your mind by a whole lot. “What do you mean, Doccy?”.

“Well, he treated me pretty crudely, but I assume he is like that towards a lot of people if I recall correctly. All that matters is that he is nice to you though in my opinion, hence the daydream part.” The Doctor explained himself cheerfully, and you could only nod to show you understood before speaking up again. “So, um, Doctor… Do you celebrate Christmas?”. The Doctor seemed to pause for a moment like prior before replying. “Of course, I do- well, I did with my past companions… Most of which are gone now, I have been alone for quite a few years now.” He still kept his smile, but you could tell how his voice wavered a little. You put your hand on his shoulder in a small attempt to comfort him, usually you hesitated at comforting others due to your lack of empathy and how some reacted, but this time felt different. “I relate to a degree, while family members usually come over for Christmas and Thanksgiving I still feel alone.” is what you told him, reflecting on your own life to try to build a sense of allyship. “You don’t have to be alone this year though; we can celebrate together.”

“Really? You mean that (Y/N)?” The Doctor replied, looking into your eyes. You surprisingly gave him eye contact back instead of looking somewhere else or away from him, something about his brown eyes made you feel safe and sound. You only nodded again, that's all you could do after all, you felt as if you said anything at all you would ruin the moment. Your parents always told you that- about you having a tendency to ruin ‘family moments’ or ‘family time’ or whatever, and you surely didn’t want to ruin this moment. Your heart started beating faster again, almost palpitating.

You two finally arrived home, your parents were still not home yet thankfully. You checked the clock, and it was only 5:50 PM. They usually came home around 8 or 9 PM. You knew you had to make dinner for yourself and the doctor, so you got out two chicken ramen cups. The Doctor seemed to stare in awe at these cups, beaming as he told you another fact about himself. “I never tried ramen before!”. You turned your head to look at the Doctor again, almost in shock at what he said. “Never?” You asked him, like he was joking or something. “Never!”. “Well, Today’s the day you try ramen, I guess.”
The Doctor’s expression stayed cheerful as you filled yours and his with water, putting his in the microwave first and then yours right after. Making ramen was one of the basic tasks you always remembered and knew how to do, of course there were some days you would have to reread the instructions though. After you finished making the ramen you placed both cups on the table carefully, then retrieved some napkins and two forks. The Doctor sat down at the table across from your seat, facing you as you sat down. “Be careful, you uh- Probably already know this but it's hot.” You told him before twirling your fork in the cup of ramen to get some of it, then blowing on it carefully. The Doctor watched you do this, repeating your actions before eating his cooled-down fork of ramen. After finishing the small portion, he looked up at you, grinning again. “It's so good (Y/N), thank you.” - You found yourself smiling a little at him, replying quietly, almost bashful. “Thank you, Doccy.”

After about twenty minutes, both you and the Doctor finished your ramen. You got up, taking both Styrofoam cups to the garbage and then the two forks to the dishwasher, putting them inside. You wouldn’t have to run the dishwasher until the day after tomorrow thankfully, so you didn’t have to worry about it right now. You returned to the dining room table, looking at the brunette who was patiently waiting for you. “So, Doctor, just to make sure- You brought more clothes in from the Tardis, right? Not just the clothes you wore today?”. He looked up at you, almost caught off guard by your question. “Of course! Why do you ask?” he tilted his head curiously, exhibiting his puppy-like qualities again. “Well, if you keep sneaking out to the Tardis to do stuff besides try to fix it, we might get caught. We might have to set up a schedule of when you can work on it, which sucks but it is for our safety… Well, mainly your safety.” You told him. He seemed to understand, only nodding in reply before he spoke as well “Sorry to change the subject, but when will we be seeing Alex again? Has anyone ever come over to your house?”

You scratched the back of your head awkwardly, thinking of how to reply. “Well... Uh, my parents don’t like me having any friends over. They don’t really like me having friends at all to begin with; But after I turned seventeen, they realized they can’t stop me from having them. Still, they don’t even like me going out to places with my friends to begin with, so having them over is out of the question.” You explained as best as you could, remembering all those times your parents prevented you from having successful friendships; Plus, your poor social skills prevented most people from even coming near you anyways, judging you based on how you looked and your body language. You didn’t want to dump all of that onto him, so you just tried to keep it simple.

“Ah, I see...” The Doctor replied, nodding his head. “You have me now though, it's like having a permanent friend!” He tried to reassure you. “What about when you fix your Tardis? Surely you have other things to do.” You said, thinking with logic rather than emotion. “Well, you could come with me sometimes! I could always visit as well.” The Doctor reassured you. “I’ll bring you souvenirs too, and I can send and receive phone calls on my Tardis. Call me whenever you need me! I’m always with you.”

You could only smile again at the thought, your chest warming up with a foreign yet welcoming overwhelming feeling. What could it be?

Chapter Text

It had been a few days since you and the Doctor spent the day with Alex, with it now being the day before Thanksgiving. You had been mainly focusing on cleaning the house repeatedly for the holiday so you wouldn’t have to hear your parents bickering and spending time with the Doctor whenever you could. Sure, you two still would do stuff in your room such as play games whenever your parents were home, but it wasn’t the same as you two cleaning together and doing random tasks around the house when they weren’t home. You truly felt like you could be yourself around the Doctor, he would always listen to anything you said and vice versa.

Today, your parents still had work, only tasking you with some minor chores due to how hard you have been deep-cleaning the house. All you really had to do today was run the dishwasher, which you already did before the Doctor awakened. The Doctor woke up around eight in the morning today, you were listening to your Diva Destruction CD as you noticed the closet door open and the Doctor step out from his sleeping area before he stretched his arms and gave out a yawn. After his attempt at waking himself up more, he looked at you. “Good morning (Y/N)! How are we feeling about tomorrow?” he asked you curiously, trying to check in with you. “Anxious, but I feel calm right now. It's the calm before the storm I guess.” is all the information you gave him, the only way you could describe your feelings right now. The Doctor seemed to understand this, and nodded his head a little. “I see, well, try to take it easy today.”

You nodded too at what he said. “I am trying to, I did the only chore I really have today before you woke up.” you felt a little proud of yourself for remembering the dishwasher procedure on your own, and the Doctor seemed proud of you too for doing it on your own. “Oh! Good job (Y/N)! So, what will we be doing today? Are we going anywhere?” - You only shook your head, putting your cold hands in your pants pockets. “Ah, I see.” The Doctor murmured before walking around your room, whistling to himself as he looked at various little Knick knacks and trinkets you had on different tables and shelves. You watched the Doctor pace around, watching every little action of his.

“I’m bored.” You exclaimed after a few minutes of your CD ending and the Doctor pacing around in silence, which caused his head to snap over to look at you. “Well, what should we do today?” “Not much to do the day before Thanksgiving.” Is all you told him, which caused the Doctor to shake his head before crossing his arms. “There is! We just have to make our own fun, it's easy!”. What the Doctor said intrigued you, tilting your head before giving him all your attention. “And how do we do that?”

“Well, we could rearrange your room.” The Doctor started to explain. “Rearranging and redecorating is like refreshing your brain, almost like a soft reset”. There was a pause, with the Doctor looking around your room once more. “Do you have any more Christmas lights?” is what he asked after the moment of silence, you nodded before getting up and walking over to the closet. You were about to get on your tippy toes to reach a brown cardboard box before the Doctor rushed over, standing right behind you and grabbing it for you. “Be careful, (Y/N)!” he warned as he placed the box down, and you stood there almost in shock. When he stood behind you it almost felt like he was about to hug you from behind again, wrap you in his arms securely like a blanket. You could only blush a little at the thought and almost space out, but you were snapped out of your thoughts as you heard the Doctor repeatedly calling your name in worry.

“Um... Uh, thank you!” You told him, before rubbing your arm awkwardly. He placed the box down on the floor and gave you a soft hug, almost like he knew what you needed. “I’m glad you are okay, (Y/N)! I know you can do it, but I get nervous that it might fall on you.” He told you. You weren’t fully sure if he was infantilizing you or not, but you assumed he wasn’t. The Doctor was not the type to infantilize you, so you knew he was genuinely worried and paranoid. You only nodded and thanked him again, crouching down onto the floor after he had let go of you and opening the box. You had another set of Christmas lights stored in the box; The Doctor began to look around the room curiously to find a place to put them before deciding that right above the window was a good choice.

“Why there?” You asked curiously, causing the Doctor to turn to you. “Well, it's like a fake light!” he elaborated, motioning to your black-out curtains. You started to understand what he meant by that and nodded. He began to put up the lights as you began to look through the rest of the box, wondering what else you could put up. You saw various room decor you collected from over the years, your eyes glazing over some paintings you created when you were younger and your fingertips brushing against room signs gifted to you from family members when you were younger. Memories started to rush through your head again of holidays past, making your stomach churn more in anxiety at the thought of tomorrow. You were always the black sheep, even when you were just a toddler, the odd one out of the family, A frog among swans. You felt bad about having to leave the doctor alone for most of the day, as your parents frowned upon you spending ‘too much time’ in your bedroom on the holidays. They said it was rude to hide away when family was over, but their actions towards you would be considered quite rude too.

After the Doctor finished setting up the lights he walked over to the box as well, pulling out some Christmas decorations you hadn’t even noticed yet due to all the contents of the box. “Ah, we can use these after tomorrow!” He proclaimed excitedly, grinning again. You smiled a little at him too, agreeing. “Yeah, we can, I almost forgot about that…”. The Doctor pulled out all of the Christmas related items from the box, placing all of it in a pile in one of the corners of your room to make sure it was ready. You looked at the items he had pulled out, one of which being a mistletoe. Ah, mistletoe, a plant couples use to trap the other into a kiss. You wondered if the Doctor would abide by mistletoe rules, probably not… Since you two weren’t a couple after all. Sure, you had seen friends abide by the rule too in certain shows and videos online, but Alex wouldn’t be okay with that.

The Doctor started looking at what else he could do with your room, looking at your CD player setup first. “We could redecorate and rearrange your trinkets too, yeah?” he suggested happily, picking up a small vintage wax clown cake topper. “Yes, but please be careful.” You told him, to which he replied to you in a calming manner. “Of course”. You watched him rearrange the various items you have collected and decorated your room with, various little oddities and neat little trinkets. His hands were gentle, every movement was precise and cautious. He seemed to know how much you cared about these items, and you felt so grateful for it. Everyone else who came into your room, which was mainly just relatives on the holidays before you realized you could just lock your bedroom, were too rough with your items. It was frustrating.

Soon the Doctor finished setting up the little display, taking a step away from the mini shelf and crossing his arms with a sense of pride. “Ta-Da! Viola!”. You looked at the display curiously, seeing how he had set it up to make it seem like all the figures were hanging out. He had placed the little brass dog statue next to a black dog statue, and when he saw that you noticed that part, he started to explain it. “It's us! Me and you (Y/N)!”. You could only smile again and chuckle, then you spoke up curiously “What about Alex?” The Doctor looked at the figures for a moment again, then he picked up a scraggly-looking cat. “Here, he can be this… interesting-looking one.”

Even though what the Doctor had said was somewhat mean-spirited, you couldn’t help but laugh. His joke had definitely landed on you, and your laugh caused him to start laughing too. You froze for a second when you heard how he snorted when laughing hard, causing your cheeks to heat up again. His laugh had started fading after a few seconds of yours ending, and he only looked at you with the same smile as before. “You really do have a nice laugh, (Y/N).” he complimented you, his voice genuine. You could only look down at your feet as your face heated up more, mumbling out a small ‘thank you, you too.’ as you fidgeted with your hands.

The rest of the day would go by surprisingly quickly for it being the day before a holiday, which is known for being quite long and tiring for you usually due to how it caused you to be stuck in ‘waiting mode’, but the Doctor helped the day go by quickly. When you went to bed that night all you could think about while drifting off to sleep was all the possible things that could happen tomorrow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You had been woken up on Thanksgiving morning by your alarm, which in turn also woke the Doctor up. He got up from his dwelling in the closet as you sat up from your bed, stretching your arms and legs before fully getting up. When you finally went to look over at the Doctor, you took a deep breath before speaking up solemnly. “I’m sorry I can’t include you in today, I really am”. The Doctor could only smile at you before placing a hand on your right shoulder softly. “I understand (Y/N), and I also know this day might be hard on you. Even though we can’t spend time together until tonight, just remember, I am willing to hear everything”. You smiled back faintly, placing your hand on top of his in slight affection. “Thank you, Doctor.”

After sharing a moment of silence of just you and the Doctor staring each other in the eyes, you finally pulled away from the close proximity the two of you were in and retrieved your outfit for today. A plain black sweater, a white button up that would go under the sweater, gray dress pants, and black dress shoes. The Doctor grinned when he saw your outfit, admiring it. “That is going to look quite nice on you, I can’t wait to see it on you”. As per usual, your face began to grow a teensy bit red and you mumbled thank you to him before leaving your room to shower. You made sure to lock your bedroom door behind you due to how your parents were home, and you tiptoed to the bathroom as fast as you could. You closed and locked the bathroom door behind you before beginning to run the shower, wanting to make sure the water heated up to the right temperature as you proceeded to undress then step into the shower.

As you started to wash your hair, various thoughts began to run through your mind. Your heart felt a sense of anguish at the thought of having to be away from your bedroom basically all day, due to both the fact that you were ‘painfully introverted’ as your family would put it and again- The Doctor would be alone. He said it was alright though, hopefully he wouldn’t be too bored. You had a few things in your room he could probably tinker around with, but the options were pretty limited. You made sure to wash yourself extra good today, just like when you went to Alex’s house. You didn’t want to hear your parent’s comments on your appearance today after all, but you knew you couldn’t really avoid it, you knew how they were. As you washed yourself while continuing to talk to yourself in your head to prepare yourself for the long day ahead of you, you stared at the wall of the shower. After about thirty minutes, you got out of the shower and dried yourself off before putting your clothes on and styling your hair. After you got yourself ready you checked yourself out in the mirror, making sure your outfit looked nice enough by straightening out any wrinkles and wiping off any lint that tried to attach itself to you.

After staring at your outfit for a few good minutes, you decided it looked good on its own, not wanting to add anything else to it. You left the bathroom and walked into the living room, where your mother was. She was pretty much just getting the living room ready for your extended family, knowing that they were going to watch football all day and essentially scream at the screen. Your mother turned to you as you stood at the end of the hallway staring at her with your usual blank expression. “(Y/N)! Why don’t you ever wear any color?” she immediately asked you, not even saying a hello or something. All you could do was shrug, then reply unsurely. “I feel more comfortable in this.”

You watched her exhale, then cross her arms. “Oh, Alright, I guess. At least you dressed appropriately and not… Lazily”. Your mother was dressed in an orange long-sleeve blouse with a brown sweater-vest over it, a black pencil skirt that went to her knees, and tan boots that went to her ankles. You thought she looked nice of course, personally you wouldn’t wear the outfit but it was a nice outfit, but you didn’t like how she tried forcing you to wear things that she likes instead of what you like even at eighteen years of age. She has always been pushy like that, thankfully she wasn’t as horrible about it like she was when you were younger though. You then walked to the kitchen curiously, the turkey was already in the oven while your father began to cook the corn on the cob. He turned to look at you, seeming angry for some reason. “(Y/N), get out of the kitchen!” he barked at you, and you quickly followed direction, not wanting to start a fight by accident. You couldn’t go back to your room at all, so you just sat down at the dining table, zoning out while staring out the window.

After about twenty minutes of this, you heard a knock on the door. Oh god, they were here and all you could do was just stay where you were seated and hope to god- no, not just hope, pray they wouldn’t get on your nerves in the first twenty minutes of them being here at least. As your mother opened the door, you first heard the voice of your grandmother basically screaming her greetings towards her along with your aunt and uncle trying to control your cousins’ behavior. You had two cousins, both around your age, yet more ‘well liked’ by everyone. Whatever you did, whether it be during the holidays or not, you were always compared to them and held up to their functioning levels. Both your cousins were neurotypical though and highly successful in most things they did no matter what, and you had a harder time doing things due to both your autism and ASPD.

Your aunt and uncle immediately walked into the dining room to put whatever mediocre food they made onto the table when they noticed you, an awkward smile coming onto both of your faces before your aunt spoke up. “Hi (Y/N)! How’s my handsome little man?” she asked you in a way that felt both offensive to your brain yet hilarious to it at the same time, all you could do though was put on a fake smile as to not offend her and speak up as best as you could. “Good, Aunt Karen”. Your aunt only smiled more and let out a forced laugh sound, you could smell the cheap wine and cologne from the other side of the table that radiated from them both. It offended your senses but you knew you would get chewed out for being ‘rude’ if you tried to get up and leave, even if you tried to re-explain your sensory issues for the one hundredth time.

They finally left the room after placing the food down on the table, which you curiously leered over to look at. Vegan gravy and mashed potatoes in two separate containers, at least they remembered your dietary choices this time unlike some people. You got up from your chair and went into the living room, wondering what the rest of your family was doing. Your cousins were seated on two of the recliners while your grandmother, mother, and aunt sat on the couch together leaving only the floor for you to sit on to try to at least include yourself in their festivities. Your grandmother looked down at you and spoke up. “Has (Y/N) done any sports at all?”

Your mother looked at you expectantly, but you knew she already knew the answer. You finally replied after turning to face the three women on the couch. “No, I don’t like most sports.” is what you said. You knew that all three of them knew this since you repeat yourself every time they come over, so you weren’t sure why they expected a different answer. “Grandma, don’t you remember, (Y/N) likes stuff such as Star Wars and... Chapter books, Nancy Drew or something.” One of your cousins, Mikey specifically, chimed in with a huge grin on his face. You corrected what he said pretty quickly, without much thought this time. “Not Nancy Drew, I like classic literature mostly. When it comes to chapter books, I like Harry Potter and Twilight.”

After you said that it felt like everyone had their eyes on you, your mother frowned ever so slightly as your grandmother spoke up again, giving her unwanted opinion on your interests. “Oh, Twilight’s for girls sweetheart, and Harry Potter is for children”. You honestly expected it a little, but you just kept looking at her as you pulled your knees to your chest. “Both are for anyone who likes them, really. I see adult Harry Potter fans all the time”. Your cousin Vanessa just shook her head, grinning as she also put in her two cents on the topic. “Yeah, and usually those people are also unemployed because they refuse to put away childhood interests and get a real job”. You felt the tension fill the air, knowing that they were all essentially trying to shame you back into your shell and it was working. You went silent again and turned away from the couch as all of their attention went back onto the television screen like nothing had just happened. No one came to your defense, no one showed interest in what you liked, no one wanted to hear the true you; While you were of course used to it, dealing with it for almost all your life, something about the holidays caused it to pain you even more. Something about festivities that are supposed to bring family together just reminded you even more how singled out you were from everybody, it felt so cold.

After a while of them sitting around and watching football, it was time to go and eat. You waited for everyone to go to the dining room first, knowing not to get in their way at all. You probably waited about three minutes before you walked to the table too, sitting down in the same chair you had been sitting in earlier. You watched as everyone talked to each other; human behavior was always interesting to you to an extent. Your mother and aunt bonding over childhood experiences they shared, your cousins boasting to your father about the amount of money they make at such a young age, and your grandmother and uncle discussing how she saved up for retirement and how hard it was for her to raise two girls when in reality she wanted a son. You could essentially care less about the topics they discussed, but it was still interesting to see their reactions even if you didn’t understand some of it. You decided to start making your plate, leaving out the turkey as per usual.

“(Y/N), are you ever going to grow out of that vegan phase?” You heard your father ask, much to your annoyance. You spoke up quietly as you began to use your fork on the mashed potatoes. “No, not particularly. I don’t enjoy meat.” You admitted to him, and he only mumbled to himself before the rest of your family began to eat too. You tried to ignore the sounds of them chewing, but it was really hard not to, it really did bother you too, but you couldn’t say anything at all. You ate in silence as they kept talking while still chewing, you swear you saw chunks of food coming out of your father’s mouth too as he chatted it up with everyone else which was just straight up sickening to you. Was this dinner God’s way of trying to punish you? It really did feel like it, the lights on the ceiling started to mess with your sensory issues too on top of everything else. Was this some kind of sick joke? You couldn’t wait until you could go back into your room again, this was just an absolute nightmare.

After around forty minutes, everyone was finished with their dinner. The last challenge that was left when it came to the rampant chewing was dessert, the final boss of Thanksgiving essentially. While yes, you were looking forward to that pumpkin pie, you weren’t looking forward to hearing the sound of several cows eating hay in your ear. You had a slice of pumpkin pie with them though, it's not like you had a choice in the matter anyways. Another forty minutes passed by, with everyone sharing what they were thankful for. Suddenly the attention turned to you as you heard your mother’s voice speak at you again. “(Y/N), What are you thankful for?” she asked as you felt everyone’s eyes on you, causing your skin to feel too tight and itchy.

“Oh, uh. My CD player.” You admitted to the table, and while they had also said some things that would also be considered ‘superficial’ to most, your answer seemed to just alienate you further as per usual. “(Y/N) and his music.” Is all your mother said before putting on another forced smile and laughing. “(Y/N) is into all that goth stuff, but also some artists like Taylor Swift…”

“Taylor Swift is also for girls though.” Your grandmother stated her unwanted opinion yet again, at this point you felt so frustrated you could explode but you tried your best to hold it in as to avoid a future altercation with your parents. “I like her, anyone can like her.” is all you replied with as you finished your pumpkin pie, everyone else returning to talking to each other and ignoring the elephant in the room. That elephant was you, you were the elephant, the odd one out.

After about three or four more hours of your extended family basically acting like they owned the house and your parents shaming you for whatever you said, they finally left around 9pm. The sun was completely gone by now, the sky a deep dark blue as the moon shined down from the spot that was usually the sun’s resting place. It felt like you could finally relax, and your parents returned to their bedroom to unwind after the long day, telling you to just be quiet and do whatever as long as you don’t make a ton of noise. You finally went inside your bedroom after unlocking the door, finding the Doctor laying in your bed and playing on your Nintendo DS. Usually, you were pretty iffy on people touching your DS, but seeing the Doctor all cozy and happy while playing on it helped you calm down from the anger you were feeling.

“Oh! Hello (Y/N), how was your day?” He asked quietly as you closed the door behind you, you could only sigh and sit down on the edge of the bed next to him, which caused the brunette to sit up and place his hands on your shoulder. “Ah, what happened? Are you okay?” he asked, a sense of worry in his voice. “My family is a bunch of idiots and all they do is alienate me then act surprised when I am not a clone of them.” is all you told him, not wanting to burden him with the full details. “I’m sorry, (Y/N). The Universe has always been good at being ignorant.” he tried reassuring you, and you turned your head to face him. “Yeah, but sometimes I feel like they are right. I am a freak”. The Doctor seemed a little shocked at what you said. “But who isn’t one in society’s eyes? Would you rather be like everyone else and conform to a life you don’t really want or be yourself and be actually happy?” he asked you, his hands still on your shoulders in an attempt to keep comforting you. You thought about what the Doctor had said to you for a minute, he had a good point. “I would want to be myself.” you told him after pondering it for a good few seconds, which caused the Doctor to smile again. “Exactly, I have been made fun of by other creatures for centuries now due to my behaviors, and sometimes I do have a hard time ignoring too but seeing the way it usually doesn’t bother you helps me keep going. I understand that it is harder to ignore when it comes to the holidays though and it's harder to avoid feelings of despair, but I am here for you- Forever, (Y/N).”

You looked the Doctor right in the eye, a small blush coming onto your face again. “Forever is a long time, though.”

“I wouldn’t mind spending it by your side, though.” The Doctor reassured your worries again, and then pulled you into a small hug, pulling away after a few seconds of keeping you in this embrace. “Say, let's eat some yummy human thanksgiving food together, shall we?” he then suggested, and you could only smile and nod as you laughed softly.

Chapter Text

Ah yes, it was finally the Christmas season- Well, technically speaking, the Christmas season had started a while ago and while you were a little excited for it before Thanksgiving you were looking forward to it even more now. It was arguably better than Thanksgiving because while you still had to deal with bullshit on that day, you got both financial compensation and gifts. It had been a few days after Thanksgiving, December in only two days. Besides December bringing Christmas, it also brought upon the anniversary of you and Alex becoming friends- December 5th. You remember almost exactly how it happened, the two of you meeting in your senior year of High School on the school bus. It was Alex’s first day, and he decided to sit next to you while you were trying to mentally prepare yourself for the day. Sure, his presence annoyed you slightly like everyone else’s existence did, but something about Alex made you tolerate him more.

You and Alex had been communicating over the phone daily for the past few days, and today was no exception. Your parents had just left when Alex rang you on the house phone, memorizing your schedule by now. You quickly answered it, placing the phone to your ear as the Doctor began to run the dishwasher for you.

“Hi hi hi, (Y/N).” You were immediately greeted by Alex’s voice, sounding cheery as ever, the grin he had on his face was almost evident in his tone of voice. His tone was always a little easier for you to read than other people’s tones.

“Hello, Alex.” You greeted him back, placing your free hand on your hip lazily as your other continued to hold the phone. “What's going on with you?”

“My day is a pretty horrorshow so far.” Alex stated honestly. “Would you like to spend some raz together on the fifth? You know what day that is.”

“Of course, but could the Doctor come? I understand that it's our day but...” You began to explain, momentarily stopping yourself when you realized what you were about to tell Alex. You loved Alex, sure, but you weren’t sure on how he would react if you told him your current pickle.

“But what? That bratchny can come, sure, but just know that it's our day.” He gave permission pretty quick, wanting to please you seemingly. You knew Alex hated the Doctor based on the last time you guys had hung out together, but you couldn’t risk leaving the Doctor home alone.

“Thanks, Alex.” You replied as sweetly as you could, not wanting to make Alex further annoyed with your lack of expression. You heard him chuckle from the other side of the line before muttering to himself “Cute, (Y/N).. You know, maybe he could give us some alone time at some point?”

Something about the thought made you nervous and you weren’t sure why. Sure, you had been alone with Alex practically hundreds of times now and you were alone together during the confession, but something about the Doctor not being around for an extended period of time made you feel uneasy. You could only agree though, romantic partners have alone time all the time after all, so it only made sense to you for you to say yes. Alex gave another satisfied chuckle and said his goodbyes before hanging up the phone. After he hung up, you put the phone back and toddled over to where the Doctor was in the kitchen.

The brunette was leaning against the wall with his hands in his trench coat pockets, tapping his shoes against the floor as he hummed along to a song that was most likely stuck in his head. He seemed to be peacefully stuck in his own little world and you didn’t want to rip that away from him so you just stayed idle. Eventually he did snap out of his head after a few seconds, realizing you were off the phone now, he looked at you with his usual wide grin and spoke up. “Hi (Y/N)! How’s Alex?” he asked you curiously, which shocked you a little. Alex was nothing but rude to him last time, yet he still aimed to be kind towards him… Besides the occasional joke about him. You shrugged your shoulders as you responded to his inquiry “Good, I think...”.

“Good, good.” The Doctor nodded his head as he went a few steps closer to you, each step making your heartbeat faster than ever. At this point, you had assumed you just looked up to the Doctor a lot; You were envious of all the adventures and friends he had made, how he was able to be himself without feeling ashamed about it… That’s why he made you this nervous, right? You couldn’t possibly like him; you were already taken by Alex. Plus, there was no way the Doctor would like you back, that is what your brain said at least.

Once the Doctor was just a few inches in front of you, staring at your face with his typical grin, you spoke up. “So…. On the fifth we are gonna hang out with Alex again. I know he is rude towards you to a degree, but I think this time will be different since he agreed to let you come over.” You told the Doctor, feeling some nervous sweat start to drip down your forehead slightly similar to the raindrops you watched race down the window of the car door when you were little. The brunette nodded, his smile only growing which only made you slightly confused yet happy that he was happy. “Alex seems to be a nice fellow to you, that is all that matters to me.” He reiterated his point of view from two weeks ago or so. “Yeah, but you should really care about how he treats you too.” You told the Doctor, usually you didn’t care who Alex was rude to for the most part, but something about Alex being rude to the Doctor just ticked you off. “It isn’t okay for him to say things like that to you, if he does try anything please let me know.”

The Doctor thought about it but nodded in agreement. “Alright (Y/N)... Thank you for looking after me, really, it means a lot!” He thanked you as he hugged you close to him, and for a moment time seemed to stand still. Your breath slowed down as he held you in his embrace, his hands rubbing your back carefully. You never wanted this to end. You were snapped out of your own personal heaven once he pulled away, those minutes of him holding you felt like one hundred years but also felt too short at the same time. You wanted more but decided not to ask. It would have just made things weird after all, at least in your perspective.

“Anyways, what shall we do today? We have been wiping out the chores pretty quickly these days!” The Doctor asked, looking around the kitchen. “You should really be proud of yourself (Y/N), you’re a hard worker! I bet you could make millions just cleaning!”

“Thank you, Doccy.” You replied as a blush came onto your face, causing you to look down at your socks and nervously grin at yourself from both happiness and bashfulness. “No, thank you!” he quickly retorted, patting your shoulder in a friendly manner. “You make it fun, I really enjoy talking to you.”

“Well... Maybe we can play this one card game, even though we already know each other's memories.” You suggested, leading the Doctor into your bedroom and pulling out a box with the words 'let's get personal’ on it which seemed to grab the Doctor’s attention, reading the words on it before giggling to himself. “This is gonna be fun! We can really get into each other's heads now!”

Both you and the Doctor sat on the floor as you opened the box up, picking up the first card, you didn’t explain the rules or anything since the concept of the game was just that single. The first card you picked up was ‘What is your favorite animal?’, you showed the card to the Doctor which made him start to think. “Well, I like dogs! I used to have a robot dog named K9.” He told you happily. “He really was a good boy; I miss him sometimes.”

“I like kittens a lot, and bats too.” You replied as you nodded, thinking of one of those idogs that were popular a while back at the mention of ‘robot dog’. “Nice!” The Doctor replied. “I am not usually a big fan of felines, but they are quite cute. Same with bats too, have you ever seen a baby bat? They are tiny!”. You nodded in reply to his question, smiling a little again. “I like baby bats, they are cute. I also like sharks a lot.”

“Sharks can be cute too!” The Doctor seemed excited at the mention of sharks. “I assumed so based on the shark plushies that you have, maybe we could watch a documentary on sharks sometime?” he suggested to you, to which you nodded in reply. You were happy to bond in any way you could with the Doctor, you really were, you had a fun time spending time with the Doctor a lot and wanted to do anything you could to make his time here enjoyable. You picked up the next card after a few seconds of silence between you two, this one reading ‘What are your goals in life?’

You thought about it for a minute, deciding to let the Doctor say his answer first again. The Doctor seemed to think about his answer for a few seconds before responding proudly. “Save people like you (Y/N), and to make sure the universe is safe.” he told you, which caused you to pause and giggle to yourself. “Wouldn’t the universe come before me?”. He shook his head, eagerly responding. “No! While some planets cannot be saved, the life on it can if you are quick enough. Some people also need to be saved due to personal struggles and the people around them, and I know you have had a tough life (Y/N). I want to help you grow stronger, if that makes any sense!”

Your heart started to beat faster again as the Doctor said this, you were honestly surprised about what he said, you weren’t used to someone saying this kind of stuff to you- Not even Alex said this stuff to you, if you were upset he usually either made it worse on purpose or ignored you until you forced yourself to feel better so he would stop ignoring you. The Doctor on the other hand actually validated your feelings and the problems you had in your life, making sure to comfort you each time. You did feel a little bad, you felt like you were pushing all of your issues onto him, but he never once complained yet.

“Thank you...” You finally said after a few moments of silence, you didn’t know how else to express how thankful you were at all, but the Doctor seemed to understand. “No, thank you (Y/N). You took me in and are actively feeding me while trying your best to keep me safe. Thank you”. He pulled you into another hug, holding you close as the two of you sat on the floor. You two had forgotten about the game as you hugged for what seemed like a while, probably ten or twenty minutes. You could feel both of his hearts beating, as he could feel your heart beating. You guys were two sides of the same coin, he understood you and you understood him- He might have been a literal alien, but people usually treated you like one too. You had never felt this strongly for someone before, you felt awful about it to an extent because you should feel this way about Alex, but you didn’t. Sure, Alex understood your ASPD to a degree since he had it too, but he felt more… Ignorant in other areas.

After a while of holding you, the Doctor pulled away, staring into your eyes with a smile on his face. You could only smile back goofily, still not used to smiling at all. “You have a nice smile, (Y/N).” he told you, which caused you to blush, but this time you didn’t hide it at all. You could see his blush too, which surprised you a little but also made you feel more relieved. It meant that it wasn’t just you enjoying the affection, he did too. The Doctor started to clean up the game after moving away from you, assuming that the two of you were finished with it. You pretty much were finished with it, maybe you two could play some games on your Gameboy or something anyways. You two already knew each other pretty well after all.

Chapter Text

It was now early in the morning on December Fifth, you had taken your shower a little earlier than usual since your parents left early for work today. They were working overtime due to the Christmas season now, not coming home until one in the morning but you weren’t complaining at all; It just meant more time outside of your room with you and the Doctor.

You were currently getting dressed in your room as you listened to the water come down from the showerhead, Ten most likely in the shower now too. You had put on a simple black turtleneck with black jeans and black converse for the day, a basic but classic outfit, you weren’t doing much today with Alex and the Doctor after all unlike last time. You would mainly be staying inside Alex’s house and helping him decorate for the holiday season, despite being on his own as a young adult he had still managed to get a decent sized house and decorating it was always a hassle so you figured you could all do it together as a group; It would be a great activity to do as a couple as well, you’ve seen couples in movies decorate together, so why not you and Alex… And the Doctor. You hoped that today was going to go off without a hitch, you really did, but could conflict really be avoided? It is Alex we are talking about after all.

You didn’t want to worry about it too much, so you just turned your CD player on and put on a random album to take your mind off of things. Slowly your brain got filled with a melody of some song you heard several times before but never got old or annoying to you, repetition really did have a way of comforting you in a way you couldn’t explain to people. As you listened to your music you also opened up your DS, playing one of the many games you had for it as you sang along quietly to the lyrics. You heard the Doctor walk in after around half an hour had passed, which caused you to pause the CD player and put your Gameboy away. “How do I look, (Y/N)?” He asked you curiously, giving a playful twirl. He was wearing a blue pinstripe suit, a red tie, and red converse- You had seen him wear the outfit a few times, but you always liked complimenting him on what he wore, he looked sharp and maybe even a little handsome to you.

“You look good.” You complimented him. “Thank you! Maybe we should buy matching suits sometime, wouldn’t that be fun?” he proposed, you did like the sound of that idea, so you nodded which caused his smile to grow even more. “Amazing! We could even get you red kicks too, it would be so grand.” - The way the Doctor talked made you smile too, something about his accent made you feel butterflies in your stomach and his choice of words made you almost laugh sometimes. After a few moments of silence, you decided it was time to head out, and with a small ‘Allons-y!’ from the Doctor you two began to leave.

The walk to Alex’s house was chillier than usual, with the sky threatening to spew out snowflakes at any given minute, you felt the frost nip at your nose as you tried to huddle into yourself. You had made sure to wear layers today under your clothes, so did the Doctor as well you assumed, he didn’t seem to be affected by the cold like you were at all. You decided not to question it, if you tried to you probably would’ve ended up with more questions than answers after all. You just summed it up to his two hearts. You stuffed your hands in your coat pockets after adjusting your black scarf, making it cover the lower half part of your face to prevent your nose from freezing off or your lips from cracking. After a few minutes of freezing your ass off, you two eventually got to Alex’s house. Before you could even knock on the wooden door, your boyfriend had opened it quickly yet quietly, not wanting to alarm the neighbors. You assumed he had been on the lookout for your arrival, probably watching from the window.

“Hi hi hi, (Y/N).” He greeted you in the usual way he always did, acknowledging you but seemingly ignoring the Doctor, only paying him a side-eyed glance that could’ve burned a hole into his head. “Hello Alex.” You replied to the brunette, entering the house with the Doctor following closely. You had the feeling he was a little nervous, not even looking back at Alex to get another glimpse of him, choosing to quickly get to the living room to sit down and relax. You sat down on the couch first, with your well-dressed friend choosing to sit on the floor like he did last time as Alex walked in and sat right next to you before wrapping a tight arm around your shoulder.

“So, Let’s skip the chepooka and put the tree up first, yeah?” Alex suggested to you two, and you only nodded, the Doctor not putting his input in at all yet and choosing to stay silent. Alex quickly got up to retrieve the box containing the parts for his fake tree from the storage room, leaving you alone with the Doctor in the living room, albeit a little hesitant to do so. You saw him glance at the both of you with his blue irises before leaving, his black boots causing the decades old wooden floorboards to creak slightly. The Doctor glanced at you for a few moments, giving you an awkward grin which you returned before Alex could come back. You quickly wiped the look off of your face once he returned, the Doctor doing the same.

“Alright.” Alex began after dragging in the plastic box filled with faux tree parts, looking at you. “This shouldn’t be a bitva, it’s real simple (Y/N)”. You tilted your head in confusion, not understanding vague instructions such as the ones Alex was trying to give you right now. “Could you repeat that?” You asked quietly which caused Alex to scoff and let out a small ‘nevermind’ before beginning to try to build the tree himself, to your surprise though the Doctor rushed to aid the other with the somewhat difficult task. You weren’t fully surprised though, he really just was that nice, even to someone who was absolutely miserable to him prior. Alex seemed to accept the Doctor’s help though, even grinning as the two chatted with each other lightly. Maybe today would be different?

Once the tree was finally set up you got up from your spot on the couch, ready to put the lights up. Alex gleefully handed you the lights, speaking in a cheery tone. “Be careful, gloopy.” He teased, which caused you to let out a small snicker before you playfully countered. “When am I not, Alex?”. After the small exchange of jokes, you began to wrap the lights around the tree with care. You had done it every year at your house so you knew how to do it; It was essentially muscle memory to you at this point and time. Alex and the Doctor stood back to watch you and while you couldn’t fully look at them due to your current task you could have sworn you saw and heard Alex try to talk to the Doctor and crack a few jokes and talk to him in a friendly manner, with Alex nudging the Doctor with his elbow lightly after making a comment about your ‘derriere’, the Doctor letting out a slightly forced and uncomfortable laugh. Maybe Alex was finally warming up to him.

You finished setting up the lights after a few minutes, getting done with it pretty quick. It wasn’t the hardest thing in the world to you at all, especially due to how forceful your parents were on you remembering how to do the task, so you got done with it pretty quick. You took a few steps back, now standing next to the Doctor as you looked up at the tree. Alex seemed to glance at you and the Doctor being next to each other for a second, it wasn’t too hard to miss since you had felt his eyes on you, but then he quickly went to look at the tree once you went to turn to him.

“Very horrorshow, (Y/N).” Alex praised your work, before opening another rectangular box that was already in the living room filled to the brim with various ornaments and decorations. You couldn’t tell if he was being sarcastic or not when it came to his compliment, but you knew better than to ask for clarification. You watched as Alex put up the first little red ball onto the tree, and you decided to start decorating as well. The Doctor seemed to stand there idly for a few moments though, watching you two with his brown eyes before Alex turned his attention away from the tree and onto him.

“Come on, ded, join the fun!” Alex said to him teasingly, talking in the same tone of voice he usually talked to you with which helped calm you some more. This time definitely would be different, you had a feeling in your gut it would be based on right now. The three of you had a fun time putting all the little ornaments on, Alex reminiscing with you how he got some of them either from family sending it over from the UK to him or you bringing him ones you bought for him, some of them you even made together just to do something.

“Doctor, you sound like you are from my neck of the woods. Where from, droog?” Alex eventually turned his attention back to the Doctor, beginning to inquire about him. “Ah, well, Bristol.” The Doctor quickly came up with a location, and Alex seemed pretty satisfied with his answer. “Visited it myself, a very choodessny place.” He responded with a grin, and the Doctor seemed to relax some more. Eventually the three of you had finished decorating the tree, getting done with it pretty quick due to how the three of you were pretty quick with it. Now it was time to decorate the rest of the house, starting with the rest of the living room where the tree was in the corner beside the television.

You grabbed a random snow globe bought from H&M or something like that and placed it on the television stand, the gold-clad ballerina staring at you from the inside in an almost taunting manner from your perspective if you didn’t remember the fact that she was an inanimate object and was not in fact trying to attack you personally. You really did have a tendency to anthropomorphize objects in your head. After placing the snow globe onto the oak stand you took a few steps back to look at it, contemplating if it actually fit there or not, but your itch had been scratched so you moved onto the next piece of decor, as you worked you listened to Alex chat it up with the Doctor about their experiences in the UK, despite living in the Tardis it was obvious your friend was used to staying in the land of the Queen during most of his time on Earth, spewing facts that Alex didn’t even know about his homeland. The Doctor really was the smartest person you had ever known at this point and time, he spoke almost like an experienced scholar, yet took care in making sure you understood him even if he wasn’t sure if you were listening or not.

You decided to engage in the conversation, now turning to face the two as you pinned one red stocking onto the wall carefully. “So, Alex, how’s it all coming along?” You asked him curiously, checking in with the image he had in his mind. Alex turned to you with a grin on his face and tapped his foot as he replied. “Horrorshow… Very horrorshow, (Y/N). You and your droog are very hard workers.” He commented on you and the Doctor’s work ethic, seemingly satisfied like a cat that had just taken quite the long nap in a sunny and warm spot on a Spring day.
“Ah, thank you!” The Doctor decided to take the compliment, smiling at Alex who turned to him and flashed a seemingly genuine smile back. “No, thank you, droog from the same Queen”. The two gave each other a playful handshake that caused you to laugh slightly, them on the other hand giggling like a bunch of fools that just got out from the bar light at night after being kicked out for having a bit too many shots of giggle-juice. You couldn't deny that they were being quite cute right now though, at least from your point of view.

The next hour and a half contained you three decorating the rest of the downstairs area; Alex choosing to avoid the upstairs since the only room up there was his bedroom, the guest bedroom, and a plain old bathroom. The Doctor had hung up a wreath made from faux twigs with a red ribbon on it up onto the door as you hung bells from various places, the type that they made the jingle bells song about. Alex placed a nice centerpiece on the dining table that resided in his kitchen, nothing too fancy but it did spruce up the room. After your trio had finished, you all went back into the living room to see if there were any Christmas specials on the television, Alex clumsily turning it on as he kept laughing from a joke the Doctor had told the two of you, it was odd to you though since Alex had never laughed this hard around you- Even in private, he kept it to a minimal giggle unless he was being sarcastic.

As the three of you sat around the television, the Doctor sitting on the floor like before and Alex huddling close to you with a vice grip on your arm, you made fun of whatever cheap special was on the screen in front of you. You had done this for a while, maybe like an hour or so, laughing and giggling hard along with the other two like you never have before. At one point you were slapping your knee from how funny you thought some jokes the Doctor made or crude comments Alex said were. Eventually Alex stood up and brushed some dust off of his pants, looking at the Doctor.

“Hey, Doctor, let’s itty to the kitchen.” Alex said, a grin still on his face but there was an unrecognizable look on his eyes. The Doctor only nodded and got up carefully, giving you a quick look before the two of them entered. You almost got up to follow, but something about the situation made you feel like Alex wanted you to stay put on the orange couch so you did exactly that. You slouched and sunk into the couch as your eyes stayed glued to the television, you were unable to hear them at all which made you feel slightly off but you didn’t want to make it obvious you were listening in on them by turning the volume down. You decided to mind your business, although you did wish you were a fly on the wall.

After a good few minutes which felt like forever to you, Alex walked back into the living room first with a pep in his step and the same grin from before, the Doctor following behind him with a slightly grim yet blank look on his face while also slouching. This made you confused, but you decided not to ask yet. Alex stood in the middle of the living room in front of the television, checking his wristwatch before looking at you. “Well well well, four pm on the dot! Time to go!” He told you two. You assumed he didn’t want you two to get caught in the dark so you got up and began to put your coat on, the Doctor doing the same before you two walked over to the door.

“Bye, love you! See you soon Droog!” Alex said as he held the door open for the two of you, addressing his goodbyes to the two of you. “Love you too, Alex, goodbye.” You replied as the Doctor managed to mumble out a soft ‘goodbye’ as the two of you left the house carefully. Once you got outside, you noticed fresh white powder on the ground and falling from the sky, making it even colder than earlier. The two of you began the short walk back to your house.

“So…” You began, walking on the outside part of the sidewalk. “What did you and Alex talk about?”. The Doctor looked at you and gave you a small smile, his hands in his pockets. “Oh, nothing too important, don’t worry about it (Y/N).” He told you, which only caused you to worry a little more. What the hell did Alex even say to him? You know you couldn’t ask directly from the source of whose mouth it came from, but you had to find out sooner rather than later. You stopped when you guys got to the front of the park, the Doctor pausing too and looking at you with a quizzical look in his eyes.

“Wanna play in the snow?” You asked him, motioning to the park with your head. “It’s only four, and my parents won’t be back until one in the morning. We have enough time”. The Doctor seemed hesitant at first, before agreeing, seemingly perking up at your offer. You opened the gate and began to walk in, your brunette companion following in pursuit. You immediately picked up some snow and rolled it into a ball, throwing it gently at the back of his coat, which caused him to turn around with a giggle and do the same to you. Oh, it was on.

You quickly picked up another handful of snow and rolled it up, this time throwing it at his left thigh which caused him to fall over into a soft pile of snow in surprise. He immediately got up and brushed the white off of him before picking up two handfuls of snow, doing the same procedure to make a bigger snowball which he threw at your stomach. You took a few steps back in shock, despite being hit with such a cold substance your body only warmed up more with adrenaline as your heart began to beat faster. You began to pick up handfuls of snow and just throw it at him as fast as you could, not even bothering to roll it at this point. The Doctor tried shielding his body with his arms, laughing as he huddled into himself. “Hey! That’s cheating! You have to roll it up!”. You only grinned at what he said, replying as best as you could as you kept throwing snow at him. “Says who, Doccy? I didn’t know snowball fights had rules now!”

“Well, two can play that game!” He said before he began to do the same to you, the two of you laughing hard as you kept tossing snow at each other. Keeping up with the friendly fire, you eventually got closer to him and started to just mash the snow against his coat playfully, trying to get him all wet. “Hey! Foul play!” The Doctor exclaimed playfully, falling down into the snow again before you helped him up, his laughter winding down as the two of you locked eyes. Everything seemed to stop, even the snow falling down from the sky and into your hair. His brown eyes staring into your (E/C) ones, you felt your heart start to beat faster- Almost palpitating at this point.

The Doctor finally managed to get up from the ground with your help, pulling you into a hug which you reciprocated. The both of you began to warm up while also winding down from the snowfight prior, the both of you letting out light snickers and giggles here and there before pulling away. “Ah, we should probably head home now, we are all wet!” The Doctor told you, motioning to your coat before motioning to his pants and coat. You only nodded, the two of you holding hands as you left the park together.

Chapter Text

The next morning you woke up a little later than usual. Your parents were at work as usual, but you had no chores to do today really. The Doctor seemed to be already awake though, sitting against the wall while listening to one of your CDs. You fluttered your eyes open to look at him, a small smile coming onto your face as your vision laid on him. “Goodmorning, Doccy.”

The Doctor seemed to snap out of his thoughts in surprise, looking at you after falling down from his cloud. “Oh! Good morning (Y/N)”. The Doctor seemed to feel better from when you left Alex’s house yesterday, the snowball fight probably due in part to that, but he also seemed a little more distant than usual and you couldn’t put your finger on how. “So… How are you?” You asked groggily, still waking up as you began to sit up in your bed with your blanket now wrapped around your shoulders. You started to stretch a little as the Doctor stalled his reply, seemingly hiding something. “Ooh... I’m quite fine!” He told you, well now you knew another little fact about him- That he was a bad liar.

“Come on, tell me.” You said to him, which he began to act confused about. “Tell you what?”. “Tell me what’s wrong, Doctor.” You repeat yourself, this time being more direct instead. He only sighed as you crossed your arms, your blood beginning to heat up as you grew a little frustrated. “Promise not to call me a liar?” He inquired, to which you nodded in reply.

“Well, Alex told me that I need to stay away from you because you are his property, and that I shouldn’t even be breathing the same air as you. He also called me a certain word that you humans consider a very offensive term and that I need to be as normal as they come.” He finally told you, beginning to frown as he did. You were a little shocked and you weren’t sure why, this was Alex after all, but it made you furious inside over how he acted nice to the Doctor just to tear him down from feeling safe and welcomed. He pulled what your family liked to pull, acting nice just to be rude right after so it would hurt more. The normal part also made you more angry, what the hell did he mean by normal? Alex wasn’t even normal himself so why did it matter to him that the Doctor had to fit in?

You felt your blood begin to boil as you got up, pulling the Doctor into a hug immediately. He quickly reciprocated the hug, not crying at all despite what he was going through. He buried his head into your neck as you two held each other for a while, pulling away after what felt like an hour. “I am going to see Alex on the nineteenth, I will confront him about his behavior.” You told the Doctor, which seemed to make him panic more. “But what if he gets angry at you instead?”.

You just shrugged at what the brunette said. “To be honest, he can stay angry. I do not care if he screams at me, but his behavior towards you isn’t okay.” You reassured the Doctor as best as you could, not wanting him to worry about you. He seemed to calm down when you said this, looking into your eyes with his soft brown ones. The close proximity along with the eye contact made your face flush a pink color, which he seemed to notice as he started to smile and blush softly as well. You seemed to stare at each other for a while, and something in your head told you to lean in but you denied it despite the fact that you wanted to so badly- You yearned for it. That settled it for you, you were in love with the Doctor and couldn’t deny it, but you knew you had to hide it. You were with Alex after all and you weren’t sure how the Doctor would react, would he even like you back? You knew he enjoyed your company and treated you as a very close friend, but he seemed to be friendly towards everyone based on how he was nice to even someone such as Alex.

“We should do something to help make you feel better, would you want to watch a movie?” You suggested curiously, the living room was open after all due to your parents not being home. He seemed to nod his head a little as you led him to the living room, him following carefully and cautiously. The two of you sat down on the couch as you picked up the remote and turned it on, opening the Netflix app. “What are we going to watch today, (Y/N)?” He asked curiously, turning to face you for a second. “Oh! Reservoir Dogs.” You told him, it was one of your favorite movies despite some of the things said within the script that makes most viewers a tad bit uncomfortable, but you were used to worse movies with one of your best friends being into extreme horror which you were also into as a result.

You put on the movie, the two of you focusing on the screen as the Doctor slowly took your hand into his. Your face began to heat up again, the blood rushing to your cheeks but you didn’t dare look at how your hands were intertwined. “This movie takes place in the eighties.” You told the Doctor, which caused him to perk up. “I have been to the eighties quite a bit! Nice era, except for the economic crash”. You nodded in agreement and to also show you were listening to what he said as you also listened to Steve Buscemi whine on screen about how he never tips the waitresses. You couldn’t help but laugh at the debacle on screen, it always managed to make you crack up at least a little somehow, and the Doctor began to laugh too.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After a few hours and around three movies later, you finally decided to turn the television off. With the Doctor feeling all better from yesterday you had decided that you two would make dinner.

“So, what are we going to have tonight?” The Doctor asked you curiously, getting up when you did and tip toeing to the kitchen. “I was thinking about chili tonight.” You replied as best as you could, trying to find the cans of chili that you knew were in the kitchen, you just couldn’t find them for some reason. The Doctor quickly found the cans on the other hand, pacing them on the counter which caused you to turn around and look at the red and brown labels. “Oh, thank you Doccy.” You sighed in relief.
As you opened the cans and began to pour the contents into the pot on the stove, the Doctor stood nearby to watch you. “So… What are you going to tell him?”

You thought about it for a minute, then carefully said your thoughts out loud to him. “Well, I won’t bring what you told me up but I will act like I heard him for certain parts.” You explained. “He has a naturally loud voice; I can easily use that as an excuse… Then I will tell him that he cannot treat you like that.” - The plan wasn’t set in stone fully; A small part of you truthfully just wanted to punch Alex in the face for being an asshole, but that wouldn’t look good on paper at all- Especially if it was on paper at the police station.

“Ah, alright…” The Doctor seemed to calm himself again, reassuring himself mentally by repeating what you had just told him to himself mentally. There wasn’t much else he could do after all, he was happy to have you to defend him yet he did feel quite bad- He didn’t want to ruin what you and Alex had, you could tell that, but truthfully you were more enchanted by the Doctor than you were by Alex. You knew you couldn’t admit that, with most people seeing that as morally wrong due to how it could be considered ‘mentally cheating’ but you could really care less about morals right now especially considering all the things you were coming up with in your head that you could do to get Alex to apologize- And again, you have ASPD, you never really thought long and hard about morals anyways. They were like daily chores you had to follow more than something that was required.

You finished making the chili after a while and began to serve it, putting some into two bowls using a ladle. You gave yourself the smaller portion, you were too busy thinking to eat fully right now. The two of you sat down at the kitchen table and began to eat your meal in silence, the quietness in the air quite heavy. The Doctor could tell that you were too angry to talk right now, so he just kept himself occupied by thinking and eating. You eventually did speak up though after a few minutes. “Hey, Doccy, I am not angry at you if you are worried about that at all.” You began to reassure him again, wanting to make your stance clear. “It’s Alex who I am angry at, really.”

The Doctor nodded in reply, giving you a small smile as he replied. “Thank you, (Y/N).” He murmured softly to you. “I really did need that; I was nervous I bothered you with that still”. You shook your head as you put down your spoon on the tablecloth next to your bowl. “No, you never could bother me, Doctor. I am glad you told me actually, I was the one who insisted that you told me after all.”

The two of you finished your meal eventually, the air full of laughter and chat that replaced the uncomfortable and unsteady silence from before, the rest of the night going by faster than before. You truly did make the Doctor feel happy again, as he did with you before. All that was left to worry about is how you would exactly confront Alex.

Chapter Text

The nineteenth had come quicker than you expected, much to your dismay. You found yourself walking to Alex’s house with a bag that contained his gift in it that was neatly wrapped as well as neatly tucked under red and green tissue paper. Despite how much care you put into presenting the gift you really could care less, still furious about what you had heard Alex say, some questions still running through your mind- You and the Doctor shared a lot of traits autism wise, so what did Alex mean by ‘normal’? You knew he tended to be ignorant, and he had made a few micro aggressive comments towards you, but you just assumed it was common from where he came from; You knew to an extent that the UK tended to be awful when it comes to mental health and teaching people about various disabilities and disorders, so maybe he just never learned? But no, it seemed to be worse than that. So many things started to make sense now; the way he got embarrassed when you started stimming in public for example, or how he shamed your comfort with repetition. It all started to come together now to you. It all really did make sense now. You chewed on your lip as you continued your trek to his house, your hands in your pockets as your palms sweated in tandem with the salty droplets dripping from your forehead despite the cold air radiating from the air and snow around you. All you felt was pure heat from your head down to your toes, almost like you were at the beach in July, but nothing could calm you down from the scorching temperatures that enveloped your body.

The walk was short yet felt quite long due to the dread you were feeling, you found yourself speed-walking the entire time, you and the Doctor decided it would be best for him to stay home while you handled the situation which also meant he wasn’t there to calm you down or talk you into a clearer mindset. It was all up to you to stay calm and not lose it on him, which proved itself harder to do with each minute that went by. How could you even stay calm? Not only did Alex decide to hurt someone you had a strong connection to, but you also had come to terms with being in love with the Doctor. Unfortunately, that made being around the affectionate alien harder, especially with the lingering hugs he gave you that would keep your skin tingling hours after they occurred or the loving stares he would give you. Knowing how much you loved him now only fueled your anger more to a degree, almost like coal to a fireplace.

You knocked on the door harder than usual, almost banging on it which caused Alex to open the door pretty quick. He had been waiting by the door again. “Hi hi hi. (Y/N).” He said before moving out of the way so you could walk in, which is what you did. You didn’t return the greeting at all; All you did was sit down on the couch as he closed the door and walked to sit close next to you. “So, what did you get for me?” he asked, which caused you to plop the bag down on his lap. He quickly opened it, ripping apart the wrapping paper and looking at it with a slight grimace. It was the same gold heart-shaped locket and matching pocket watch you had bought in November for him.

“I’m not all for gold, anymore.” Is what he told you, which caused you to lose it completely, any sense of self-restraint you had keeping yourself from attacking him going down the drain. Whatever self-control you had left was being used to keep yourself from punching his nose truly, which you knew would be so easy to break but also could put you in a world of trouble- All you could do was use your words. “Figures, you are a spoiled brat, Alex.” You said, but not in the joking way he was used to from you, your tone had a venomous hiss to it that had caused the blue eyed brunette to flinch and glare at you. “What cal is stuck up your ass?” He asked, then placing a hand on your shoulder. “Did that ded hurt you?”

You smacked his hand away and got up, now standing over him. “No, it’s how you hurt him. What the hell do you mean by normal Alex? You are not normal yourself after all, tell me what the hell you meant by that.” You demanded, your face growing redder with fury by the minute. Alex froze for a second before grinning at you, some sweat droplets rolling down his forehead now as well. “Chepooka! I never said that! let’s calm down-” He tried to lie, but you knew whatever he said was bullshit now. “No, I heard you.” You told him, sticking to your plan from before. “What the hell did you mean by normal?”. Alex sighed, deciding to try to come clean. “(Y/N), stop creeching. It’s just that… Autistic behavior like that needs to be corrected.”

What he had just said, while trying to do damage control, only backed him up into a corner more and you knew that. You had never heard outright ignorance from someone who was not in your family like that in your life despite facing years of ableism from peers and strangers alike let alone try to defend an opinion so elementary. “Alex, I'm autistic, and you have a lot of balls telling someone to be normal when you have aspd. You really are one to talk, you fucking idiot. Do you know how much your ignorance makes sense now to me? Here I was, thinking you just didn’t get the chance to learn about it due to whatever school you went to, but here you are- Exposing yourself as a huge fucking idiot.” You snarled through your teeth, which caused him to stand right up. “You are a fucking nazz!” He screamed in your face, getting up close to you. Your eyes spotted that he was slowly starting to pull back his fist, so you pushed him to the floor before he could punch you causing him to hit the carpeted ground with a slight thud. “I’m a fool? Alex, you are the one who started this!”

“This is what I get for lubbilubbing with someone who has a lower intelligence level with a cow, you really are a sodding shoot, just like him. I should have never wanted to have pol someone who has special needs” Alex groaned from his spot on the floor, looking up at you now. The eyes that once looked at you with love now looked at you with pure anger and hatred. “You can try to defend your stupidity, go ahead, but don’t include me. We are done Alex, done. I do not want you to call my number, I don’t want you to send me any emails, don’t even try showing up at my house. I really do mean it when I say we are through, and if I catch you trying to come around me I will smack some sense into you! Who knows, maybe it will do you some good.” You spoke clearly, not stuttering even once as you picked up the gift back with the items originally for him before leaving the house. When you walked out the door Alex got up and tried chasing after you, standing right outside his door as you walked down the walkway on his front lawn.

“You can TRY and leave (Y/N)!” He screamed out with whatever force he had in his throat that grew weak and sore as his body trembled with a mix of anger and turmoil, causing some of his neighbors to peek from their windows or open their doors in curiosity. “But if I can’t have you, or viddy you at all, no one can! You’ll come crawling back to me once he leaves you, I know it!” - You ignored whatever words he shouted at you, not even listening as you blocked off whatever word vomit came from him with your mind. You did try to pick up the pace though as you walked home, not wanting to get caught up in a physical fight with him if he did go even more haywire then he already was right now and follow you home. You got home quick as you did depart from it, your visit was short after all.

You took your coat off once you entered the front door, hanging it up on the coat rack before returning to your bedroom where the Doctor was, sitting anxiously on your bed and twiddling with his thumbs. He had obviously been waiting for you, worried sick over how the confrontation would go. You carefully sat down next to him after placing the bag on your bedside table, hesitantly wrapping an arm around his shoulders. “Hey… So.” You cleared your throat before you continued the rest, looking down at your lap with a sense of uneasiness as you spoke shakily. “Me and Alex, we broke up. It’s not your fault, but he cannot treat you like that.”

The Doctor looked up at you in shock, his attention off from his hands now and onto you instead. “Really? What happened while you were there?” He asked in utter confusion and wonder. “Well, he admitted to not being… too fond of autistic people.” You simply told him, not wanting to go too much into detail in case it upset him. “Oh… I’m sorry (Y/N), I really am.” He placed one of his hands on the leg closest to him, patting your leg as a way to comfort you. “No, it’s alright!” You reassured the brunette as best as you could, still a little shaken up from the confrontation. “It’s no use getting through to someone like Alex, he is stubborn after all.”

The Doctor nodded in agreement, starting to smile a little again which meant your attempts were working. His eyes wandered over to the bag, which caused him to tilt his head. “What’s in that?” He asked you curiously, which caused you to hesitantly pick the bag up again and put it on his lap. “Oh, it was going to be Alex’s but… Well, he didn’t want it.” You told the Doctor, watching him gingerly pick up the pocket watch and the locket that were a few centimeters away from each other on the palms of his hands. He seemed to look at the little ornate pieces of jewelry in awe, his eyes gleaming with wonder. “How could he not want these? These are so delightful…” He thought to himself out loud, which caused you to blush softly. “Maybe I gifted them to the wrong person then.” You replied to his comment. “They’re yours now, Doccy.”

The Doctor grinned at you excitedly, looking up from the two objects before placing the pocket watch in his suit pocket and turning around after handing you the locket. You carefully put the locket around him, clasping the two ends together as your hands carefully brushed against the back of his neck causing him to shudder lightly. He turned back around to face you once you finished, still grinning, almost from ear to ear. You moved to hold both of his hands, intertwining your fingers with his almost as an act of instinct. Being this physical with the Doctor felt right to you, it really did. You never felt this way with Alex, and you knew why- Alex was not the perfect fit for you. Sure, you both had ASPD and understood each other on that level, but you and the Doctor connected more to the point that no words could describe how strongly you felt about him. Maybe it was fate, destiny that his blue police box landed and broke in your backyard- Speaking of that, it was a wonder how your parents didn’t talk about the mysterious police box in their yard, maybe they were just ignoring it for the time being? Whatever, you weren’t complaining. All that mattered to you was that you were with the Doctor, right here and right now. As for Alex, well, he could see you as everybody’s fool for now. He didn’t matter to you right now, but you did have the feeling that he might try something in the future, but you tried to ignore that feeling for now. Maybe you were just paranoid?

Chapter Text

Christmas seemed to be coming quicker and quicker now that you didn’t have to deal with Alex anymore and your parents barely being home, all you had to worry about was keeping the Doctor safe and the ache in your heart that longed for him. You two were currently seated at the breakfast table, the two of you drinking some hot chocolate together while chatting casually, for a while about random ideas and plans that you guys were thinking about.

“Oh! That reminds me!” The Doctor eventually perked up even more than he was before, his eyes glimmering with excitement as he motioned to the back door. “I managed to figure out what was wrong with the Tardis! Some gears were not working, over the next few days I am going to take a few minutes out of the day to work on them! A nice oil up and bolt tightening”. You grinned back at the Doctor, happy for him, but something caused you to grow a little paranoid at the same time. Sure, he said he would visit you and spend time with you as much as he could but something about him being away from you made you feel… Well, it was too complicated to explain. The Doctor seemed to notice you were zoning out, getting stuck in your head again, so he tilted his head and tried speaking again. “Hello? (Y/N)?” He murmured to you, which caused you to snap out of your thoughts and look at him again. “Oh, Sorry Doccy, it’s just that… I’m nervous about you leaving.” You told him, deciding to be truthful about your thoughts.

“Oh? Why is that (Y/N)? You know I can always visit you!” He told you, using one of his hands to give you a very gentle noogie on your head. You laughed a little as he did this but shook your head which caused him to pull his hand away with a slight giggle coming from him. You took a deep breath to collect your thoughts again, trying to find a way to explain whatever word vomit you were about to spew. “Well, it’s um… You are the only person I know in real life who understands me, the only one I want to be around really. What I'm trying to say is that, well, you are my best friend.” You opened up to him softly, holding back the urge to tell him how much you really loved him right then and there. The Doctor’s smile began to grow softer, his eyes watering almost. “I consider you quite close to me too, (Y/N). I consider you a best friend as well.” He told you, getting up and walking over to where you were sitting, hugging you from behind and squeezing your body in a quite comforting manner as you stayed seated. It made your heartbeat faster, your skin beginning to tingle as your face began to warm up. “I feel a little bad for asking, it can certainly be dangerous but… Maybe you’d like to come with me on the Tardis once I fix it?” The Doctor asked quietly, just barely whispering in your ear. You were about to say yes, but for some reason your body began to freeze up and your brain refused to let you say any sort of tangible words. “I… I don’t know.” Is all you could say, despite how much you wanted to shout out and repeat yes several times.

The Doctor nodded slightly, seemingly understanding your dilemma. “It is a huge decision to make. Like I said before it is quite dangerous, and I don’t want you to get hurt!”. You nodded slightly, still wanting to say yes, but several thoughts ran through your mind- What if the Doctor grew annoyed towards you? What if he found out you loved him and felt disgusted about it? Your own brain truly was one of the only things holding you back, along with your parents. Despite you being eighteen and them pushing you to ‘act your age’ they were quite possessive, with them not liking you having friends or barely letting you go out. They never knew about the hang outs you would have with Alex; You knew how to sneak things past them after learning it was quite easy.

The two of you returned to regular, more casual conversation. You took a sip of your hot chocolate as you listened to each word the Doctor said, every each and last one sticking to your brain like a sticky note to journal paper. While you were listening to him you couldn’t help but continue to think about how fast the Doctor could be gone in the near future; How he could disappear from your life just like that, similar to how fast he came into it and how fast he changed it. What once was a boring, dull, and life full of suffering became a life full of laughter and hope… Would it have to return to the former?

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Night had come as quick as day had come earlier. It was only ten at night, so you still had a long way to go for your parents to come home but you and the Doctor already retreated to your bedroom. The two of you were listening to some music as you played on your DS as per usual, the Doctor watching from over your shoulder as the two of you sat on the floor around your CD player as if you two were children surrounding the television to watch the Saturday morning cartoons. You sighed in frustration as you lost the current boss battle you were on for the thirteenth time, exiting your game and shutting your game system down before putting it back onto your bookshelf. “It’ll be alright, (Y/N)! You can always try again later.” The Doctor reassured you as you took deep breaths in and out, reminding yourself to stay calm and that it was only a game. The Doctor’s words also helped; He always was able to calm you down after all, just another reason why you loved him so much.

“Yeah, you’re right.” You told him after exhaling, then turning to look at him in his puppy-like brown eyes. You couldn’t help but feel emotional on the inside like you were earlier. The thought about him leaving came back to stab you in the shoulder and almost paralyze you as you stayed staring at you. He didn’t say a word about your fixed gaze on him, only returning it as his eyes softened. His hands found their way to your shoulders, slowly rubbing them in a way that caused you to relax even more as you began to melt into his touch. You almost pinched yourself, was this some sort of dream you were having? No, it was indeed real and the way you two were leaning in closer was real too.

You only realized it was real though when you finally felt the touch of his lips on yours, a ton of fireworks beginning to go off in your head and in your stomach as your eyes widened in shock at first at the fact this was happening to begin with but then closing as you screamed with joy internally. You had been waiting for this for a while now, only recently realizing you wanted it but now that you had it you realized how much you needed it. The two of you kissed like that for a while, your hands crawling up to the back of the Doctor’s head as you felt his soft brown locks in your hands. Eventually you two did pull away due to needing to breathe and all of that jazz, but when you did pull away all you could do was smile at each other.

“You have soft lips.” You told him, wiping off some excess drool that formed around your lips due to the kiss. “You as well… You really have no idea how long I've been wanting to do that!” The Doctor told you with excitement, smiling even wider. You felt your heart begin to race even faster than it did as the kiss was occurring, shaking your head in shock and bewilderment. “How long you’ve been waiting? Doctor! I’ve probably been waiting longer than you; I knew I was dating the wrong person when I realized I liked your hands on me more than his.” You started to laugh a little, referring to Alex. The Doctor started to laugh a little too, pulling you into a tight and loving hug before you guys' locked lips again, eventually pulling away after a few minutes to breathe again. All your worries about him leaving you were diminished for the time being, all your attention now on your newfound love. The rest of the world could wait; your parents, Alex, and everyone else could wait. Time seemed to slow down as the two of you held each other on the floor and continued to share little kisses, giggles, and hushed words in each other’s ear.

“I can’t believe you actually like me back!” The Doctor said to you with a smile on his face. “I was worried that you didn’t like me back, Doccy.” You replied to him, snickering a little as you tapped his shoulder affectionately. “I thought you would never in a million years like me back!”. The Doctor shook his head when he heard what you said. “(Y/N), Any man in his right mind would be lucky to have a catch such as yourself! I understand why Alex was so clingy to you, admittedly I was quite jealous. I noticed he didn’t fully treat you right though, his responses to your stimming and all that…But you have me now.” He smiled more which you quickly returned before he rubbed his nose with yours, laughing softly.

“You must be really good at hiding your jealousy then.” You responded after he pulled away, to which he then nodded. “You do learn how to hide things quite well when you come to be my age, (Y/N).” - He seemed to frown after he said that, looking down at his lap which confused you. “What’s wrong, Doccy?”

“Well, I was hesitant to tell you because you are human. I can live forever, go on forever, but you will eventually die (Y/N).” He began to explain, his eyes welling with slight tears. “I have lost many companions in many ways, and thinking about losing you just hurts me.” - You took his hands into your hands, intertwining your fingers together with his as you leaned in closer to whisper in his ear. “We don’t have to worry about that now, I'm sure we can find a way to make me immortal, but for now we can just celebrate”. The Doctor looked up, wiping his tears with his and your hands together before smiling at you. “That’s one of the many reasons I love you, (Y/N). I don’t have to worry around you, you make them go away.”

“I could say the same for you, Doccy.” You responded before pulling him into another kiss, the current song that was playing on your CD player fading into silence as time stopped again. Time could wait to begin again later, all that mattered was here and now.

Chapter Text

You were currently getting ready to leave your room for Christmas, you had already taken a shower and gotten dressed into your outfit for the day which was a black turtleneck with black dress pants with black dress shoes to pull the outfit together. The Doctor rubbed your shoulders comfortingly as you did your usual deep breathing exercises to ready yourself for any possible annoyances and upsetting remarks that would come your way today, with him whispering encouraging words to you.

“You’ll get through it.” He murmured into your ear, pulling his hands away from your shoulders carefully, then moving so he was standing in front of you now, carefully putting his forehead against yours and looking into your eyes as he softly took both of your hands into his. “I promise, this day is going to be a good one (Y/N)... And if anything goes bad, you can always tell me about it, okay?”. You only nodded in reply, leaning in closer to close the gap between you two and kiss him on the lips. You eventually pulled away from the kiss and gave him one last hug, the two of you saying your ‘byes’ for the day as you left your bedroom, closing and locking the door behind you.

You walked into the living room, being greeted by a decorated and light-filled tree full of presents under it. A ton of presents for other people, but only one small one for you. It would probably be another scratch ticket again from your father, or a cologne that was horribly offensive to your senses from your mother. You moved to sit on the couch, your parents too busy preparing a meal in the kitchen to come and complain about your outfit or reprimand you for your facial expression that always stayed mainly neutral- When you did smile though, a genuine smile of course not one of those fake smiles, they would always complain about how ‘creepy’ you looked. There was no winning with your parents, they were your first bullies after all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It didn’t take much waiting for your extended family to arrive, flooding into the living room as you got up from your couch knowing that if you didn’t your parents would get pissy at you over it claiming that your cousins deserve to sit there more than you or whatever; You didn’t really care fully, once your family had arrived the uncomfortableness you had leaving your room while people were home grew even more, there was no denying that and despite how you couldn’t hide that your parents still shunned you for staying quiet often times. Thinking about coming back to the Doctor helped you stay calm though, to the point that you could ignore anything occurring in the room right now as you sat on the floor and acted like you were watching whatever 80s sitcom Christmas special was on the television screen right now.

You knew how good it would feel at the end of the day to return to the Doctor, to fall into his arms once again and finally be able to kiss him more. You were still over the moon about how he loved you back, you had to hold back a grin just thinking about it. It was the best Christmas present you could have ever dreamed of. You finally had him where you wanted now. It was like your wildest dreams had come true.

You were so stuck in your head that you didn’t hear your mother calling your name at first, but when you did your head immediately fell down from whatever cloud it was stuck on and hit the ground hard. You turned to her and tilted your head slightly, signaling that you hadn’t heard her. She scoffed a little to herself before repeating her words for a final time. “Can you check on the cookies? See if they cooled down?” She asked, knowing she just wanted you to leave the room so your family could talk about you behind your back, you knew how it was. You gladly got up without question and hustled over to the kitchen, only looking at the cookies for a second before leaning against the wall and looking out the window. It was snowing outside, not too hard but a decent amount, the typical scene from a hallmark Christmas movie- Speaking of those, why was there so many? Whatever, you weren’t too worried about whatever Christmas version of the MCU a greeting card company was trying to make. You heard your parents and other families ‘whispering’ about you in the other room and while you knew it was best to avoid whatever words came from their mouths, something in your brain told you to listen this time.

“He doesn’t connect with us; He stays in his room all the time. It’s not like we want to though, but his interests are too… childish for us. We have told him that he needs to grow up several times, but he just won’t!” Your father exclaimed, the eggnog he had five glasses of already was really making him a bit too honest. “This is what we get for having a son who had to go to special education classes.”

“At least we get government benefits sometimes.” You heard your mother chime in. “Sometimes though I felt like we should have hid (Y/N) away from the general public- It’s almost like he is a robot sometimes for crying out loud, he never even smiles around us or shows any emotion! I wish we had Mikey and Vanessa for kids sometimes, then we would at least be proud and a happy family.”

You let out a soft, disappointed sigh when you heard your mother say the last words. Her idea of a ‘happy family’ was a family that hid their problems in public, a family that could be seen as the ‘traditional family’, the typical 1950s families; The unrealistic idea of a family, something that was unachievable. Your parents had called you selfish several times, but everyone is at least a little selfish and that is a fact but if they were going to shame you for it, they should at least listen to the words that came out of their mouth pertaining to you for once in a while. Maybe Alex bad talked behind your back like this before, he always bad talked his old friends from the UK after all; Granted they did rat him out to the police, but he seemed horrid to them as well that now you can’t help but think he deserved it. Maybe it was the post break-up rage you still had within you that was, who knows? You were never there and there is no way for you to find out. One fact you did know was that the Doctor wouldn’t talk about you like this at least- The bare minimum that someone could do, and he was able to do it. He really was the perfect person in your eyes, more of an angel than an alien. He was your slice of heaven.

You felt like the typical teen girl depicted in those teen movies, obsessed with love and obsessed with her love interest/boyfriend, but you couldn’t help it. You finally found someone in real life who completely understood you, accommodated you, and loved you with no exceptions. He loved you for who you are and didn’t shame you for how you had no empathy, how you showed very little emotion, how you didn’t care about things, your violent thoughts- None of it, he shamed you for none of it despite his character. You would’ve thought someone like him would see you as a villain in his story, but he loved you with no second thoughts. You could finally have a happy ending, that is if you said yes to traveling the universe with him. You felt the same pit in your stomach you had felt a while ago, would you really be able to escape this place? It’s not like your family had spaceships to follow and the Doctor on or some sort of time traveling device they could use to run after you through time, but you couldn’t help but feel nervous about it. If they found out about the Doctor he could be in danger, they could try to call the police and claim that he was some pervert stalking you and if he got arrested, they would most likely find out about him being an alien which would definitely lead to something worse. As for you, if they found out about you being gay you wouldn’t hear the end of it, you know they would disown you over it but at the same time you knew they would also force you to stay in the house as well- Hell, maybe they would send you away to be ‘fixed’ instead. You didn’t want to think about all of the possibilities and outcomes that could happen. You began to walk back to the living room where your family still was, they quickly changed the subject to make it seem like they weren’t talking about you at all once they heard your footsteps.

“Does it really take that long to check on cookies that are cooling down?” Your cousin Mikey turned to you, instigating you already with a grin on his face. You simply looked at him for a few seconds before turning away and sitting back down on the floor while facing the television, acting like he hadn’t said anything to begin with. The rest of your family paused as they looked at you, acting like your response was out of line before continuing to chat with each other and ignoring you again. At least they weren’t bothering you as much this time like they did on Thanksgiving, man did Thanksgiving feel like a century ago.

You got snapped out of your thoughts once more when you heard a knock at the door, you turned to look at the front door as the rest of your family kept chatting, leaving you the duty of answering it. You got up and walked over to the door with a slight feeling of annoyance, who the hell was knocking on your door at Christmas? Your other family members weren’t coming over as far as you knew, and where you lived Christmas carolers weren’t really a thing. You turned the doorknob and pulled the door open quickly, about to open your mouth to ask who it was before you quickly paused whatever you were doing. Your mouth remained open as your eyes widened, your heartbeat quickening as well as you felt a sense of uneasiness cover you like a blanket as anxiety-fueled adrenaline rushed through your veins.

It was Alex.

“Hi hi hi, (Y/N).” He greeted you so casually, like you were still dating or friends, something that made you feel full of anger. Before you could even reply Alex pushed you out of his way and entered your house, looking at your family with that shit-eating grin of his and a mischievous look in his eye. You quickly shut the door and stood against the wall, almost like you were backed into it as you braced yourself for whatever could come next. It felt almost like your heart was in your throat as you took a deep breath in, your eyes still wide and almost refusing to blink feeling as though that if you did you would miss something important. Your family looked up at your ex-boyfriend/friend, the rest of your family confused as your parents quickly recognized him as one of your buddies. While your parents never liked any of your friends Alex managed to have this manipulative charm to him that made anyone in his general vicinity trust him as if he were the best guy around. “Hello… Uh, what’s your name again?” Your father asked him, typical. “Alex, Alex Delarge. I am here to… inform you of a certain detail about your son”. You felt sweat beads start to trip down your head, quickly speaking up with whatever force and courage you could muster up inside your trembling body as your family looked on in confusion. “Alex, don’t! Just stop!”

Alex ignored your pleading words as he faced your whole family, beginning to talk. “Your son is a homosexual; he has been hiding it from his Em and Pee for a while now. He has been fooling around, having the good old in-out-in-out with a chelloveck called the Doctor”. The room fell silent after Alex had said this, the found of his shoes on the floor and the audio from the television being audible as he turned to you almost like he was in slow motion. “I meant it (Y/N). If I can’t have you, no one can.”

You knew Alex didn’t know about you and the Doctor’s relationship yet, especially due to the second lie he used pertaining to the topic of intimate relations, but he obviously wasn’t making up the part about you being gay. You covered your face with your hands as your father stood up, getting ready to scream at you before your cousin Vanessa stood up first which caught everyone’s attention.

“Listen, I am not the biggest fan of (Y/N) either, but you don’t just out someone like that- So what if he is gay and seeing someone, he is a legal adult.” She started to speak, which surprised you, the reason why was pretty self-explanatory. Your father turned around to look at her, a huge frown on his face. “I’d rather have a dead son before I would ever allow a gay son in my family, we believe in traditional families in this household.” He growled, then turned to look at you, Alex just standing there with the same grin as before. You saw and heard the rest of your family besides Vanessa begin to take jabs at you, shaming you for how you loved. You felt years of pent-up anger begin to rise within you though, almost like filling a glass up with piping hot water. Eventually the glass would overflow though, as did you.

“Everyone SHUT UP!” You screamed as loud as you could, which caught everyone’s attention. The Doctor seemed to have heard all of the commotion and despite his best judgment came out of your bedroom slowly, everyone turning to look at him but before you could say something you raised your voice again. “No! Look at me, LOOK AT ME!”. They all seemed to flinch before looking at you, almost dumbfounded.
“You all shouldn’t be shocked; You should have seen this coming. Years of being tormented by you assholes and you expect me to let myself be brought down for something I cannot control by a bunch of dumb fuckers like you? Well, technically I already let that happen, you already shame me for my autism and ASPD. You shame me for my interests, you shame me for my hobbies, you shame me for my friends… Any bit of info about me you can get your feeble-minded hands on you all shame, yet you get angry at me for being quiet? For being reclusive? You have no idea the pain you all put me through, the nights I spent crying when I was younger wishing for God to kill me. I have spent years, even now to this day, thinking I was defective! But guess what?” You motioned over to the Doctor. “HE is the only one here that has made me feel welcomed, he has made me feel like I belonged, like someone actually fucking matters for once! Without him there is no me!”

Your mother started to cry, walking over to try to hug you but you quickly pushed her away from you, taking a step back. “Don’t touch me, I have said before I do not like being touched. That just shows you know nothing about me, all you care about is your image. That’s all you guys ever care about, yet you call me selfish for putting myself first and taking care of myself.”

“Don’t you even love us though, (Y/N)? How could you be so mean to your family?” Your grandmother asked. “Because I hate you all, all you have done was made it clear that you all hate me and that I am not welcome here and I have put up with it ever since I could walk but here I am! Letting it all out and guess why?”. You quickly turned to Alex. “Because of you, my ex-boyfriend, who is also not the straightest tool in the shed himself! Funny how you decided to out me just because you couldn’t handle rejection, how sad is that?”

Alex just stared at you, his grin growing into an angry pout. “Funny how you shamed me for being autistic and told the Doctor to be normal, when you yourself had to flee the United Kingdom for the various crimes you committed- Tell me, didn’t some include physical assault?” - You saw Alex go to raise his fist as if he were getting ready to punch you, but before you could you pushed him to the floor and began to kick his ribs as hard as you could which caused a few of your family members to gasp and your mother to cry harder. The Doctor ran over, pulling you away from Alex and into a tight yet comforting hug which you slowly reciprocated, as you calmed down from your justified outburst though you began to cry in his arms. You buried your face into his chest as your tears stained his suit jacket, but he didn’t seem to mind at all.

He turned to look at your family, ignoring the wheezing Alex on the ground who was trying to recover from the non-fatal kicks he took. “You all should be ashamed. (Y/N) is the sweetest person I have ever met, yet you all put him through hell… And for what? He took me in when I needed it most, when my Tardis broke down in your yard.”

You gasped through tears as you heard him expose the truth, but you tried to not stop him. You knew, in your heart, that the Doctor knew what he was doing.

“During that time, I learned about his past and his present, including about how horrid to him you lot were on Thanksgiving; Scratch that, you have been awful to him since he could remember, I have heard about all the things you guys did to him. But guess what? He has me now, we have each other now, and I am grateful to have him. You can try to shame out love, but just know that he has a perfect reason to hate you all. If you want to try to hurt him, you’ll have to go through me.”

Your father tried walking over to the Doctor, getting ready to hurt him seemingly, but before he could the Doctor kicked him in the gut to get him to stop. Your father winced and fell to the ground, the brunette really was stronger than he looked. Your distressed mother immediately ran to your father’s side, kneeling next to him as she glared at the two of you. “Get out of my house, leave my son alone!”

Before you could protest, you felt your cousin Mikey hold you back as your grandmother ushered both Alex and the Doctor out of the house. You tried struggling, trying your best to fight back but your cousin really was stronger than you. You and the Doctor locked eyes as you watched him being forced to leave, tears in your eyes. Despite your vision being blurry though, you managed to see him mouth the words ‘I’ll be back’ as his brown eyes stared into yours right before your grandmother shut and locked the door.

Chapter Text

It had been days since you had last seen the Doctor, a week basically due to the fact it was now December 31st. Since that horrible day you had been locked in your bedroom by your father somehow despite how your door locked from the inside, you weren’t fully sure what he did but you were too pissed to think about it. You had Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner delivered to you but that was it when it came to any interactions. You knew you had to find a way to escape, your parents already were quite homophobic, but based on what happened on Christmas day you saw how your father was ready to knock your daylights out just for coming out. Who knows what else they had planned for you, but you didn’t want to find out at all.

You paced around your bedroom like a caged animal for the fifteenth time that day, your mind thinking about the Doctor still, he was the only thing occupying your mind right now and the only thing that's keeping you going. You missed him dearly and every time you thought about him you felt your heart ache, but you couldn’t help but think about him. Some nights you couldn’t even rest, those nights were usually spent staring up at the ceiling as you thought about him- Everything about him, from his hugs to the way he smiled. He truly was the only one who understood you fully, but you were being kept away from him. Torn away from your one true love, it almost made you want to give up, but you couldn’t.

You knew you were going to see him again, but how? You didn’t know where he was staying currently, but you knew you had to flee as stated prior. You already had a suitcase and a backpack packed with various clothes and sentimental items you knew you would need on your journey across the universe once you got to the Tardis, nothing could stop you now. This would all end tonight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Night came quicker than you expected, you had spent the entire day playing on your DS and listening to music but when you heard the volume of the television in the living room grow higher at around eleven PM you knew it was your time.

You pulled out various boxes from your closet and began to stack them against the window as best as you could, you knew to choose heavy boxes to prevent the probability of them falling as you climbed them. You tried to tiptoe around the room despite the sounds erupting from the television drowning out any small sound you made, not wanting to risk anything. You got done building your pseudo ladder pretty quick and climbed up, opening the window but not pulling the curtains open. You climbed down and fetched your suitcase first, pushing it out of the window and onto the ground. When you grabbed your backpack, you repeated the same action as before. You went as quick yet carefully as you could, almost like a worker ant bringing food back to its dying queen inside of the hill. After your belongings were outside you began to crawl out of the window, standing right up after you were fully out of your bedroom. You grabbed your backpack and put it on, then you held the handle of your suitcase as tight as you could before running as far away as your legs could manage. You knew that your parents had not noticed anything out of the ordinary for them most likely, but you did not want to get caught somehow. You never once looked back as you ran down the sidewalk, eventually your speed did slow down as your legs began to ache and you realized you were far enough away, finally turning around to see your house from a distance. You never thought you would have this sort of freedom, and it felt really nice to get a taste of it finally. You looked around at your surroundings, the road next to you barren due to everyone either being at home or at some party for New Years. No one would report you for being out anyway, you were an adult. You could always use some excuse that you were walking home from a party or something. They couldn’t report you for just walking after all.

Your mission wasn’t done yet though. You had to find The Doctor.

You heard your name faintly being called by his voice which caused you to look around in confusion, snapping out of your thoughts as you looked around. You didn’t see him, but something told you to follow the voice. You hesitated for a moment, wondering if your mind was playing tricks on you, but ultimately decided to follow it. You went as slow as you could as your stomach churned though, your brain was telling you it was a cruel trick, but your heart was telling you something else. What if it was a trick by Alex? Or what if it was a trick by some neighborhood kids that somehow found out about your sexuality? You felt your palms begin to sweat as you followed the voice, hoping that you would avoid some sort of beating or kidnapping. You listened to the snow crunching under your feet as you found yourself approaching an empty parking lot that was behind some building, looking around before pausing when you saw a faint glow from across the parking lot. You grew confused as you squinted your eyes to try to get a better look, taking a few cautious steps forward to see it better in the blinding white snow. The glow was coming from something blue... That is when it all clicked inside of your brain, it was the Tardis! The Doctor did wait for you, just like you had waited for him.

You started to run towards it, the Doctor stepping out of the Tardis and running towards you as well to meet you halfway. When the two of you finally were in close proximity, he pulled you into a tight hug which you quickly reciprocated, one of his hands rubbing your back comfortingly. “(Y/N), I knew you would find a way somehow. I missed you so much.” He spoke softly into your ear, which caused your heart to beat faster like it did many times before. “I missed you too, Doccy.” You replied, feeling his two hearts speed up as well.

“Nothing can stop us now.” The Doctor said as he pulled away from the hug, taking your hand and leading you to the Tardis. Once the two of you were inside, you looked around with a sense of shock and wonder- It really was bigger on the inside. You almost couldn’t believe your eyes. Yu knew a little bit about what it looked like due to the Doctor’s memories that he shared with you, but you never really expected something like this.

The Doctor closed the door behind you and walked to the console of the Tardis, motioning you to come over which you did. You held onto his arm carefully as he pressed some buttons and pulled a lever. He turned his head carefully to look at you again, his eyes full of love and adoration as he did so before kissing your forehead gently and pulling away with a small grin on his face. “Hold on, (Y/N). They’re not gonna get us.”

You continued to hold onto the Doctor as the Tardis began to leave Earth, leaving all the things that have hurt you in the past behind as you finally began your new life with the Doctor.

Chapter Text

It had been a few weeks since you started traveling with the Doctor and the two of you already had quite the handful of adventures together ranging from saving planets to going back in time to save people such as Marilyn Monroe from aliens, it was quite fun but could be challenging at times yet no matter what the Doctor always cheered you on. The two of you were almost like a detective duo, you did make a pretty good team. You had always managed to point out smaller things that the Doctor seemed to have missed prior, which he was always thankful for. He thought you were quite the genius.

Today you were just hanging out on the Tardis though, taking a break from the usual stress that life would bring. You were sitting in the console room playing on your DS as the Doctor hummed a tune to himself, sometimes making up some words when he suddenly looked at you. He suddenly froze when he felt one of his pockets for something, then spoke up carefully. “Oh, (Y/N)! I have something for you!”

“Really?” You replied curiously, pausing your game as you sat up in the seat. The Doctor nodded as he walked over, standing behind your chair now as he pulled out whatever was in his pocket and undid the clasp as he put it around your neck then hooking the clasp back up again. It was some sort of blue necklace that was glowing a bright blue. You gasped in surprise as you looked at it, your cheeks heating up slightly. “What… What is it?” You asked curiously, knowing that it was a necklace but also wondering what was making it glow.
“It’s some sort of communication necklace, it lights up whenever the person wearing the necklace it's connected to is thinking of the other. See?” The Doctor got in front of you and showed off his, which was obscured by his tie before. You nodded as you blushed more, looking at his before looking at yours again. “I got it on the last planet we were on as a surprise but forgot that I didn’t give you it yet! Silly me.” He grinned before laughing slightly, which caused you to laugh a little too.

Once the Doctor calmed down and his laughing had stopped after a moment, he started to talk again, putting his forehead to yours affectionately. “This way if we are ever separated, as long as we have these necklaces, we know that the two of us are still thinking about each other”. When the Doctor said this, you grew confused, looking into his eyes. “Separated…?”

“Well. I have gotten… Separated from companions before, Some I even had to send back to Earth to save them.” The Doctor reminisced as you began to remember the memories, he had shown you, all of those people that he was once friends with and how he had to let them go. “I hope I won’t have to let you go (Y/N), I really do…”

You took his hands into yours and intertwined your fingers with his, looking into his eyes before kissing his cheek gently and pulling away slowly. “You won’t ever have to let me go, Doccy. I am here forever; I want to be with you forever. We don’t have to worry about me leaving right now”. The Doctor smiled at you after you said that, beginning to feel better. “You’re right, (Y/N). I love you.”

“I love you too Doctor, Forever and ever.”