Chapter Text
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Chapter 8 of Riding Free
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Regret, retribution, redemption.
Xander Windsor at times wondered what might have changed, if he hadn’t simply blamed his baby brother every time things went wrong.
It began with that dusk-damned raid on the bandit camp.
It ended…well, it had not truly ended. But things changed when he was cradling his baby brother on the black altar of Nohr’s throne room. Finally trying to make some sort of amends.
But, again. It began with that dusk-damned raid on the bandit camp.
...
“Why did you blow the dam?” Xander demanded, after unfairly following Leo back to his bedchambers, after ignoring him for days. Feeling so frustrated by yet another act like this, one that could’ve killed so many of their own men, that he didn’t stop to notice how hurt his baby brother was over the accusation.
“I didn’t!”
“The men said - “ The men said Leo had been seen destroying the dam. Said that he’d used his magic. Said that he’d laughed as he’d done it, and Xander just wanted him to understand that hadn’t been the right way. But Leo was throwing his pack down on his bed and turning to point an offended finger at his elder brother’s chest, and Xander began to worry.
Worry that he'd had listened to the wrong side of the story.
“We didn’t even know about the dam, because you refused to send sentries,” Nohr’s Second Prince cut in sharply, voice just as sharp with hurt, and Xander inhaled because something had gone wrong here, “We didn’t know about them building over the riverbed because it was Izumo’s concern, not ours.”
The Crown Prince of Nohr shifted his feet to a wider stance at the dangerous glint in his Little Prince’s eyes, grinding his teeth to not say something that would make the fragileness of his voice worse.
He hadn't sent sentries because the informants Iago had sent to him never claimed they'd dammed the river. That was his fault. For trusting that blindly. And the nearby villages were the ones to call for aid, Nohrian villages, which is why Nohr stepped in in place of the neutral land of Izumo. But Leo wasn't pausing to listen to such explanations.
“We were there, in an unfamiliar kingdom, without proper surveillance ahead of us. We didn’t know what we were getting into.”
All very true. His little brother was often more aware of such things, but the men had said something else.
“You still - “ Xander began slower, trying to say, ‘You still haven’t told me if you were hurt.'
Because he'd been informed Leo was washed away in the chaos, damn all of those stupid rules about keeping a distance that royals were supposed to follow. But he was pretty sure Leo misunderstood.
Since his little brother threw his arms in the air and began raising his voice as he cut Xander off again.
“I didn’t, because I was in the cavalry, Xander! I was with them, far from the dam, in the middle of the river. I was alone because you stationed my retainers far across the camp, because your men were unwilling to cover me. I was there when the waters came, and I was washed away with Rose!!!”
Taking a step back, Xander felt shame flood him, since he’d definitely been operating under a misunderstanding, and he knew that now, but Leo had worked himself up and the blonde boy was shouting. Just kept shouting.
“I was with Rose as we were rolled by the waters, unable to breathe. And then I was with her when we climbed out and I had to heal her sprained leg. I was with her when we found our way back, and all of your men began to blame me!”
There would be punishments doled out for this, Xander swore, looking at his little brother there breathless with anger and clenching his fists.
Before Xander could try and apologize properly, then, Leo didn’t wait around for it.
He turned on his heels without another word, grabbing the pack he’d thrown down, and heading for that one empty alcove of his bedchambers. A stone wall that shimmered like an illusion. That melted away to form the door to his private study that Xander could not follow him into.
“Wait - Leo!”
The stones remade themselves, sturdy and as real as any other wall, just as Xander rushed after his little brother. He rested his palms on them, but it was like Leo had never passed through. He was kept away, as if he were a threat, bending his head to rest his forehead to the cool stones. Xander couldn’t hear his little brother drop his pack, then slide down to the floor hugging his knees, whispering -
“I didn’t…”
And Leo couldn’t hear Xander thump his forehead against the stones in self-frustration as he whispered -
“I’m sorry.”
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