Archive of Our Own ^beta

Jisung isn't sure how long he stayed on that sidewalk, but at some point, he made it back to the dorm. He doesn’t remember the actual walk, his feet just leading the way while his head felt both too full and too empty at the same time.

His phone buzzes loudly on his desk like it has done several times that morning already, but he doesn’t spare the vibrating phone a glance, his eyes fixed on the ceiling from his splayed-out position on his bed.

They are brothers…

What’s that black spot on the ceiling?

Minho and Felix are fucking brothers…

He couldn’t possibly have spilled anything that high up.

And now they are at their mom’s birthday…

He should try and clean it.

Doing who knows what later…

Would he be able to reach it?

While he is right here…

Maybe if he stands on his desk.

On his bed…

He would have to move it a bit closer.

Just staring at the ceiling…

What could it even be?

Wondering about a black spo-

“ARRH!” Jisung jumps off of the bed, eyes still on the black spot that is now moving across the ceiling. A fucking spider. He shivers. He isn’t a big fan of spiders. He watches as it crawls toward his closet, disappearing somewhere on top of it.

Great.

He sits down backward on his desk chair, leaning his arms on the back of it with his eyes fixed on the top of the closet now. When that spider comes out of its hiding spot again, he isn’t going to be caught off guard. What he’s going to do when he sees it again, he has no idea.

He wishes the spider would have distracted him for longer because it doesn't take long before his thoughts find their way back to his current predicament.

Half of him is absolutely over the moon after everything that’s happened. Felix said that he wanted more—more with Jisung—and then he kissed him like he really meant it.

But all that happiness doesn’t feel like it matters all that much when the other half of him is—

Struggling.

He knows he should be thrilled that he had a threesome with two very hot and sexy men; anyone else would surely be ecstatic after a night like that.

Then why does it leave him feeling so uneasy?

Is it because of the whole brother part of it all? That would leave most people feeling uneasy, he’s sure.

But, no, as much as that might leave him confused and feeling a whole bunch of things, that isn’t what makes his stomach turn every time he thinks about last night.

He sighs like he's done an unbelievable amount of times already and drops his chin on top of his folded arms.

He knows exactly why. It’s because there is one person in all of this who he has no idea what is thinking.

Who is Minho even?

Despite all their hook-ups, Jisung doesn’t know him. Not that he’s tried to get to know him, but Minho hasn’t either. It’s been simple between them: fuck and goodbye. And then deal with Minho’s hot and cold personality the rest of the time, pretending like nothing ever happened.

But now what? Are they going to get to know each other like he heard Felix suggest to him? Does Minho want that?

Because they have one very big thing in common: they both want Felix.

He heard the way Minho spoke to Felix, heard him telling him that he would do anything for him, how much he’d missed him. Heard him call Felix his everything.

And Felix—

Felix likes Jisung.

But he loves Minho.

Jisung heard that as well.

A smarter man than Jisung would’ve pulled himself out of the equation already. Let Minho and Felix be whatever they are and save himself from the inevitable heartbreak. But how could Jisung ever do that? How could he ever tell Felix that he only wants to be friends when that is the farthest from the truth?

He is in too deep now, and there is no turning back.

Jisung, you are not getting out of this alive.

He’s dozing off when a loud knock on the door startles him awake. His arms slide down the backrest in shock, resulting in his chin hitting it hard and almost making him fall to the floor.

“Jisung, it’s me!”

Changbin. Of course, it is Changbin.

“I’m not really in the mood for company,” Jisung yells back as he straightens up, rubbing his chin.

“Too bad, I’m not planning on leaving. Just open the door so I can see for myself that you are alive.”

Jisung groans and reluctantly gets up from the chair. He’s been ignoring Changbin’s phone calls, but that doesn’t usually leave him this worried.

Knowing the stubbornness of his closest friend, he walks to the door and opens it, but only just enough to peek his head outside at Changbin.

“See? I’m alive. Thanks for stopping by!” Jisung says quickly and is just about to close the door again when Changbin slams a hand against it, leaving Jisung no chance of pushing it closed. Changbin and his damn strong arms.

“Nuh-uh, that’s not enough,” Changbin says, shaking his head and giving him a look that Jisung knows he has to take seriously.

“Fine.” Jisung sighs and opens the door, gesturing for Changbin to come inside.

Changbin sits down on the bed without further invitation and looks Jisung up and down a few times. “You look like shit.”

Jisung huffs and drops down onto the chair again. Trust Changbin to tell it like it is. “Thanks.”

“What have you eaten today?”

“Uhh, some—” Nothing. He has been too much in his head to even consider food, but now that it’s been brought to his attention, he does feel slightly lightheaded.

Changbin sighs and takes out his phone. “What are you in the mood for? Jjajangmyeon? Been a while.”

“Sure.” Jisung nods and watches as Changbin quickly places an order through the app. “Bin, why are you here? A few missed calls don’t usually make you feel like you need to babysit me.”

Changbin puts his phone down and looks up at him warily. “A few? No. But ten? And I’m pretty sure something is up if you are on your knees on the sidewalk without moving for twenty minutes.”

Oh. He’d been on his knees? He can’t remember that at all. He rubs a hand over one knee and jerks, feeling a slight burn at the touch.

“How did you—?”

“Hyunjin was out for a run and noticed you a few times. He called me when he had the chance. You wanna tell me what’s going on?”

“It’s nothing serious. I was just tired after yesterday and took a break,” Jisung says and shrugs his shoulders with his hopeless attempt at a lie.

”People don’t usually take breaks on the sidewalk.”

“Really, it’s nothing!”

“Sung…” Changbin looks at him with a stern expression, but Jisung looks away. “Fine, I’ll let you be for now. But only until we’ve eaten.”

Jisung doesn’t reply, and Changbin doesn’t mention it again. Changbin doesn’t say anything at all actually, but lets Jisung sit in silence as they wait for the food and then goes down to the lobby to pick it up when it arrives. Changbin sits down on the chair by Felix’s desk, not even asking Jisung if he’d rather eat somewhere else, and hands Jisung his bowl of jjajangmyeon.

With the first bite, Jisung realizes just how hungry he is and starts shoveling down the noodles, but then, halfway through, he slows down, remembering what is waiting for him when he’s done.

“Jisung, I know what you are doing.”

Jisung looks at Changbin and glances at the empty bowl in front of him. “What? Is it a crime to enjoy your food?”

“Never in the nearly six years I’ve known you have you ever eaten this slowly.”

Jisung neatly picks up some noodles with his chopsticks and fills his mouth while looking at Changbin. Chewing as slowly and for as long as he can while maintaining eye contact, he lets the noodles turn into a ball of mush that doesn't even taste good anymore.

Changbin shakes his head and gets up from his seat, and for a moment, Jisung thinks that he might be left alone, but Changbin just dumps himself down onto the bed again, smiling. “Lucky I’m patient.”

Jisung rolls his eyes but then eats the rest of his noodles like he usually would, deciding that they taste better without him proving a point with each bite.

He barely gets to take a sip of water after finishing when Changbin reminds him that he is still waiting. “Done?”

Jisung sighs.

“Great, come take a seat,” Changbin says, patting a spot on the bed beside him. Jisung obliges but doesn't sit quite as close to Changbin as he urged him to do. “So tell me what happened last night. Did you tell Felix about Minho?”

Jisung nods, humming.

“I take, by the state of you, that it didn’t go too well?”

Jisung shakes his head. It did go well. Kind of.

“No, it didn’t go well?”

Jisung shakes his head again.

“It did go well?” Changbin raises an eyebrow.

He nods this time.

“But something happened.”

Jisung groans loudly.

“Okay, you are gonna have to give me a little bit more to work with here or I’ll be staying here guessing till midnight.”

Jisung sighs. He might as well. “I, uhm, told Felix that I like him. As more than a friend.”

“Oh,” Changbin lets out, his mouth forming a perfect ‘o’ for a moment while processing. “I didn’t know you felt that strongly about him. So that didn’t go well?”

“It did go well. He—” Jisung pauses for a moment as the scene that leaves him breathless plays in his head. “He kissed me.”

Changbin‘s face lights up, and Jisung can tell that he is just about to congratulate him, but then his cheerful expression is replaced with confusion. “Why do you look like it all went like shit then? Where’s Felix now?”

“Home. At his mom’s birthday,” Jisung mutters as he looks down. With Minho.

“I’m still struggling here because this can’t just be because you miss him. I assume he left somewhere around when Hyunjin saw you?”

Jisung’s body deflates completely, and he pulls up his knees to hug them, his chin resting on top. “I’m just not sure where this left us.”

Changbin hums and nods in understanding. “Well, what would you like to happen?”

“I want to be with him.” It is one of the few easy questions for him to answer, but easy or not it hurts to say it out loud. “But it’s not that simple.”

“If you like him and he likes you, then what is the issue? Is it Minho?” Changbin asks, cocking his head. “But you said Felix took it fine?”

“Yeah, he did but—” Jisung shakes his head and then drops his forehead onto his knees, hugging his legs a little tighter. “It’s much more complicated than that.”

“Wait, are they both into you?”

“Definitely not!” Jisung says, swiftly lifting his head at the ridiculous question. They might have fucked several times, but it is not like that between them, and never has been. The real question is whether they will be fucking again, but now with Felix in the mix…

His head is spinning again, and he desperately needs it not to, at least for a while.

“Then what—”

“Bin,” Jisung says with a heavy sigh, “I’ll explain it all to you at some point, but right now, I’d rather not think about either of them at all.”

Changbin furrows his eyebrows, studying him for a moment, but then gives him a sympathetic smile and nods. “Okay. Hey, Hyunjin’s roommate got a PlayStation, and he’s usually pretty nice. I could ask Hyunjin if he might let us play?”

Ten minutes later, Jisung is busy destroying Changbin in Tekken while Hyunjin cheers him on, and for a few blissful hours, he forgets everything about anyone called Lee.

He turns again. And again. And then again.

With a frustrated groan, he pushes down the top half of his duvet and picks up his phone from beside him. It’s been almost an hour since he went to bed, hoping to get some rest and feel better tomorrow, but that is easier said than done. But, of course, it isn’t that easy.

Not only because of his restless mind, but he’d also gone to bed very early for a Saturday night, and judging by the many sounds coming from outside his room, he is the only one trying to sleep.

Maybe he should just give up for now.

A ray of moonlight hits him in the face when he sits up on the edge of the bed. The light coming in through the curtains probably isn’t helping him fall asleep either.

He gets up and reaches across his desk to pull the curtains, but then he gets a peek outside—snow.

Jumping onto the desk to sit, he pulls the curtains apart and looks outside. Snowflakes are falling peacefully, landing on the ground several floors down, where a thin layer of white is already showing.

The first snow of the year. Glistening in the moonlight.

His head snaps to the empty bed that doesn't belong to him. He wishes Felix was here to watch with him, sure that he’d be so excited. Oh my god, Jisungie, look! It’s snowing! The thought still makes him smile even though Felix is nowhere near him.

He unlocks his phone, his finger quickly hovering over Felix’s name. It isn’t that late yet, he could always call him. Or maybe just text him. Ask if the trip home went okay and if he had a nice day celebrating his mom. Their mom.

On second thought, maybe he shouldn’t contact Felix at all.

He sighs and lets his head hit the cold window, watching the snow fall.

A sudden vibration in his hand startles him. Felix.

He clears his throat, and with a loudly beating heart, he answers, “Hello?”

“Jisungie! It’s snowing! Is it snowing on campus too?”

Jisung smiles, Felix’s excited voice sounding exactly like he imagined.

“Yeah, it’s snowing here too!” Jisung answers happily. “A lot actually. I’m sitting by the window looking at it right now.”

“Me too.”

“Is that why you called?”

“Mhm. Made me think of you.”

Warmth spreads through his whole body, absorbing every worry within him. “I thought of you too.”

“I wish I could watch it with you.”

“Do you see the moon too?” Jisung asks, looking up at the big bright ball in the dark sky.

“Mhm.”

“We are looking at the same moon, so in some way, we are still watching together.”

He cringes internally at his cheesy notion as soon as the words leave his mouth, but then he hears Felix giggle, and the sound of that is worth every bit of cringe.

A comfortable silence follows, only their breathing letting the other one know that they are still there.

“I have to go now,” Felix says quietly as if he doesn’t want to disturb the silence. “But I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Can’t wait.”

“Goodnight, Jisungie.”

“Goodnight, Felix.”

They both hang up, and Jisung feels much lighter inside.

He jumps down from the desk and takes one last glance at the moon and the many snowflakes before drawing the curtains, but he doesn’t close them completely, deciding to let a bit of the moonlight in after all.

He gets back under his duvet, ready to give sleep another chance, but when he is about to close his eyes, something catches his attention.

The black spot is back.

He doesn’t jump out of bed like earlier, instead, he just looks at it curiously. It is a pretty harmless black spot.

“It’s all gonna be alright,” he says out loud, Felix on his mind. “Right?”

The spider doesn’t reply.

Jisung wants to close his eyes, but instead, he keeps staring at the spider that is as immobile as earlier when he first discovered it. He scrunches his nose. He still isn’t a big fan of spiders.

He glances to the side and decides to get out of bed again. After taking the few steps necessary, he lifts the duvet that isn’t his and gets comfortable under it, holding it tight. With his nose buried in the soft pillow, he inhales deeply; honey and home.

Slowly, his mind gives in without him noticing. Warm and safe. Asleep.

When he wakes up, he is a bit disoriented at first.

He usually never sees the room from this angle, but then he remembers that he is in Felix’s bed and not his own, and that’s when everything comes to mind again.

It is the feeling of being completely convinced that something is just a dream but then realizing that it has indeed happened.

Everything good and bad from the confession at the party and waking up in Minho’s room, to kissing Felix goodbye and realizing that Minho and Felix are related, is crowding his mind in an instant.

Then he remembers that Felix will be back later, and a small smile finds its way to his lips. Felix will be back, and soon enough, he’ll be able to hug him. Kiss him.

If he hasn’t changed his mind about him.

No. Felix called him last night, and they watched the snow. The first snow.

He can’t help but bury his nose in Felix’s pillow for a few seconds more before his bladder forces him to leave the warmth of the bed.

When he returns from the bathroom, he pulls the curtains apart and is immediately blinded by an unexpected brightness; everything is covered in a blanket of snow. The trees, the benches, the turned-off fountain, and since it is early Sunday morning, most of it still appears untouched, the sun reflecting off of every single patch of white.

A few people all bundled up and busy making a snowman make him smile. Jisung would make one too if Felix was here. Maybe they can when he gets back.

At least he already has plans today, so he’ll be plenty distracted until evening. Tomorrow is the start of a new week, which also means the start of a very busy month with exams coming up. The smart choice would be to spend the day studying, but Changbin made a good point out of him not being in the best condition for that and quickly made plans with Chan for what would probably be their last chance of getting together this year.

So he has a quick shower and dresses up as warmly as possible for the walk to the frat house through the snow.

“Right on time,” Changbin says when he meets up with him at the entrance of the dorm building so they can walk together.

“Thank you for this, Bin.”

“No problem.” Changbin drapes his arm over Jisung’s shoulders and ushers him out of the building. “Ready to talk about it yet?”

Jisung shakes his head. “Not yet.”

The snow is much deeper than Jisung anticipated, and when they arrive at the frat house, the bottom half of his jeans are damp and his feet cold. They hurry inside, not wanting to spend a minute more than necessary in the cold.

“Great, you’re here!” Chan says when he sees them stomping their feet free of snow.

“Have you been outside today? It’s crazy,” Changbin says, shivering.

“Thankfully, I haven’t had to,” Chan says, chuckling. “Wanna get started immediately? I've got something new I want you to check out.”

With a loud groan, Jisung stands up, stretching his legs that are feeling stiff after sitting in the same position for too long. Chan had another brilliant track for them to work on, and all three of them have been so immersed in working on it that they haven’t moved for several hours.

“I’m gonna go get some water. Anybody else want something?”

“Water would be nice,” Chan replies. Changbin nods.

Jisung walks down the hallway, headed for the kitchen downstairs, but when he gets to the door of the only other room he has ever visited on this floor, he comes to a halt.

It was only yesterday that he woke up in that room after sharing the bed with Minho and Felix.

He absentmindedly pulls out his phone but quickly puts it back in his pocket again; no new messages. He sighs deeply, his eyes back on the door. What does Minho want with him?

"He's not here."

Jisung jumps. Eunwoo suddenly appears, leaning against the door frame of the next door.

“Eunwoo, hi! Oh, I know. He went home with Fe—" Jisung stops before he can say the rest of the name, but of course, it is already too late.

"Felix? So the brothers left you all on your own, huh?" Eunwoo raises an eyebrow.

"You knew?” Jisung asks, taken aback. Eunwoo cocks his head as if he isn’t sure what exactly he knows. Jisung looks around warily before stepping closer, whispering, “You knew they were brothers?"

Eunwoo smirks. "I mean, you definitely just confirmed it, but I guess I did?” He chuckles, then, looking thoughtful, he adds, “If I’d had to put my money on whether or not they were, that would've been my bet."

"You could've told me. I wouldn't have—" Jisung shuts himself up again, his eyes wide. Fuck. What was he just about to let slip?

"Wouldn't have what?" Eunwoo asks with a smile and another raised eyebrow.

Jisung feels his whole face heat up. How much does Eunwoo already know, and how much is Jisung just gonna end up accidentally telling him? His eyes flicker around nervously, and only then does he realize where they are standing; it has to be Eunwoo’s room—right next to Minho’s. How much has Eunwoo heard?

Eunwoo laughs. "Look, I obviously don’t know any details of what happened, but would it really have made any difference if I’d said something?"

"Of course, it would! You're not exactly supposed to—" His mouth slams shut again. He is shit at this.

"Be honest,” Eunwoo says, giving Jisung a serious look when he doesn't continue, “not for me but for your own sake. Would you have done anything differently?"

Huh. He hadn’t even thought to ask himself that. Would he? Then he remembers why he’d chosen to do what he did, and the answer is simple.

"No." He shakes his head. “I would’ve made the same choice.”

“Good for you.” Eunwoo winks at him. “So what’s next for you and the Lees?”

“I honestly have no idea…” Jisung trails off. Right now, he is holding onto the hope that he will find out later when the two return, and he can have that talk with Felix they both know they need to have. “It’s all so fucked.”

“I guess happily ever after would have been too predictable,” Eunwoo says, nodding slowly, but then he claps his hands together loudly. “But I’m ready for another season! I hope you are too.”

Jisung snorts. “You are talking about my life like it's some K-drama.”

“I promise it’s so much more fun if you pretend it is.”

Jisung huffs, shaking his head with a slight smile on his lips. “Thank you, Eunwoo.” Then, with a swift motion, he turns around and heads back toward Chan’s room.

“For what?” Eunwoo calls after him, confused, but Jisung just laughs to himself. “By the way, if you want to share any of those details, I’m right here!”

In his own weird way, Eunwoo helped him figure out some things. Brothers or not, it wouldn’t have made a difference. Jisung would still have confessed his feelings to Felix, and he still wouldn’t have left the room when Felix asked him to stay. He felt too strongly about Felix that night, and he still does. And if this is in fact a K-drama, he will just have to make sure it has a happy ending. Even if he isn’t sure what kind.

“You were gone for a while,” Chan notes when Jisung closes the door behind him.

“Yeah, I ran into Eunwoo,” Jisung says, but then he stops dead in his tracks, remembering why he left the room in the first place. “I forgot the water.”

“No shit,” Changbin says, eyes moving to his empty hands.

Chan laughs. “I’ll go get it. I know how to dodge Eunwoo if he starts talking too much,” he says and leaves the room.

Jisung drops down onto the chair by Chan’s desk again and, purely by reflex, pulls out his phone. One glance and then a sigh. Nothing.

“Why don’t you just text him?”

“What?” Jisung looks up, brows furrowed at Changbin.

“I’ve seen how you keep looking at your phone. You’re waiting to hear from Felix, aren't you? Just text him.”

Jisung blinks at Changbin’s observation and then looks at his phone again. Maybe he should. But then he tells himself what he’s been telling himself every time it crossed his mind: that it’s silly when he knows Felix will be back later. And that he shouldn’t bother him while he is enjoying time with his family.

Jisung shakes his head. “I’m sure it’s all good.”

The walk back to the dorms is even colder. It’s snowing again, and the wind is mean. As soon as he gets to his room, he changes into a dry pair of sweats and pulls his duvet around him tight, trying to get warm.

He looks out at the dark sky from his bed. He still hasn’t heard anything from Felix, and the weather isn’t looking to get any better. He hopes everything is okay…

He glances at the phone he left on the nightstand. Another moment passes, and then the phone is in his hand, doing what he’s been itching to do for a while now.

It rings a few times, but then Felix picks up.

“Hi, Jisungie.”

His stomach twists. That definitely isn’t Felix. “Hi, Minho.”

“How can I help you?” Minho’s voice sounds overly sweet, the kind that feels like it can’t be trusted.

“Can I talk to Felix, please?”

“Sorry, he’s currently unavailable, but I can take a mess—“

“Hyung, who are you talking to?” Jisung lets out a sound of relief when he hears Felix’s voice in the background. “Is that my phone?”

“Nice talking to you, Jisungie.”

“Jisung?” Sweet, warm, genuine. Felix.

“Hi, I just wanted to hear when you expect to be here?” Jisung says happily, but then he hears a sigh.

“I’ve been hoping that we’d be able to leave all day, but the weather is so bad here it’s not safe for Minho-hyung to drive. I don't think I’ll be back tonight.”

The happiness is sucked out of Jisung in an instant. “Oh, that’s—” Unfortunate. Sad. Possibly heartbreaking. “Too bad.”

“I'm sorry.”

“It's not your fault.”

“I know, but—” There’s a pause, then, “Want to just talk for a bit?”

Jisung smiles widely. Of course, he wants to. He’d like nothing more since Felix can’t physically be there.

“Just a moment.” He unwraps himself from the duvet, but only to settle on the other bed in the room, surrounded by one of his favorite scents in the world. “There. How was your day?”

Felix starts telling him all about what they’ve been up to the day before for the birthday, and that he’d been outside for a snowball fight with his parents (and Minho) before the weather got too bad. Jisung, in return, tells him about his session with Chan and Changbin, explaining and humming different parts of the track to a very enthusiastic Felix.

It’s nice. Reassuring. They are still Felix and Jisung like before, just now with a promise of something more between them that doesn’t need to be addressed right at the moment.

The corners of Jisung’s mouth don’t falter, his smile only disturbed by laughs and giggles until it is time to say goodnight, and his head hits Felix’s pillow with a warm feeling in his chest.

But despite all of that, he can’t keep away the unwanted voice at the back of his head saying that where Felix is, Minho is too.

And Jisung isn’t.

With a sinking feeling, he rushes back to Felix's bed to pick up his phone, but he is met by a black screen; his phone drained of battery after having talked to Felix for almost an hour before bed.

He quickly finds the charger and looks impatiently at the phone that shows charging in progress but won’t turn on yet. He just has to get ready for class while waiting.

He soon realizes that he has no idea what time it is, but when he steps out into the hallway, it’s empty, which is his second sign that day that it’s still early in the morning—the first one being that it isn't completely light outside yet.

After a trip to the bathroom for a shower and whatnot, he is back in his room, grabbing his phone that finally turns on.

With a silent prayer, he opens the weather app, but his stomach doesn't get any lighter. Any hope of Felix returning today is gone in an instant, as it shows a full day of snow in Felix's hometown further up north. But tomorrow looks much better. Maybe tomorrow.

His day is a busy one, filled with lectures, and each class feels like the professors are trying to cram another semester’s worth of info down their throats because of the upcoming exams before Christmas.

Halfway through, he gets a text from Felix, and just as expected, he tells him that they won’t be able to leave today. Despite already having made peace with that probably being the case, his heart still sinks.

Maybe tomorrow.

When he takes a seat in the lecture hall for psych101, he spots Hyunjin a few rows down waving his fingers at him.

He’s smiling but looking slightly wary, which Jisung supposes is a perfectly fair response after the last time he'd seen him (on his knees on the sidewalk). Jisung waves back, hoping that his own smile is at least a little bit reassuring.

Finally done with all of his classes for the day, Jisung’s head is so full he wants nothing more than to collapse onto his bed, but despite it having been only a day, he already feels behind. So instead of heading to the dorm, he drags his feet to the library.

An hour later, the floor of the library looks much too inviting. He sighs deeply, wondering whether he can afford a break already. He glances around, and he is far from the only one there, the library full of students cramming for tests, suffering like himself. At least he isn’t alone.

As if Changbin knows he needs a break, he receives a text from him, telling him that he’s going to the gym in case Jisung wants to join him.

Jisung is tired—really fucking tired—but it is mentally much more than physically, and a workout might be just what he needs.

Besides, Felix likes Thor. And the Hulk.

Jisung spends most of the workout trying to figure out how to let his best friend in on what is going on in his head. He wants to talk to Changbin about it all, knowing that it might help relieve his overused brain. But when they are about to finish, he still hasn’t figured it out, so—

"Have you ever had a threesome?” Yep, Jisung, that is the way to go. Baksu.

Changbin spits out a sip of water he was just drinking. “Jisung, what the fuck?”

Jisung looks at the wet gym floor beside them, his cheeks flushed. “Never mind, just ignore that.”

“Zero chance I’m ignoring that,” Changbin says and drops his towel to the floor, moving it around with his foot to soak up the water. “But a warning about the change of topic would’ve been nice.” Changbin looks around the gym for a moment, then nods his head to the back end of the gym. “Let’s go stretch.”

Changbin picks up the towel and leads the way to a desolate corner of the gym. They both grab a mat to sit on, Changbin pulling one knee in, stretching his glutes. Jisung follows his lead, the stretch more welcome than he expected.

Changbin squints at Jisung, taking him in for a moment. "First things first, Hyunjin and I aren't looking for a third. Sorry."

"For fuck's sake!" Jisung lets out a bit too loud and pushes Changbin on the shoulder. Changbin laughs, catching himself with one hand on the floor after being pushed over.

Jisung releases his leg with a groan that has nothing to do with the stretch. He regrets everything about this conversation, but at the same time, he just really needs to talk about it. Get it out of his head.

"Thought it was good to get it out of the way. Save you the embarrassment." Changbin shrugs his shoulders like it’s the most logical course of action and switches legs.

"I do not want a threesome with you and Hyunjin!"

"Why not? Are we not hot enough for you or something?" Changbin says, raising an offended eyebrow. "Never mind, we wouldn't ask you anyway if we were in fact looking."

"Oh my God..." Jisung slaps a hand against his forehead, dragging it down his face.

"Now that we got that out of the way, no, I’ve never had a threesome,” Changbin finally answers Jisung’s not so well thought out question. “And it's not hard to figure out why you’d bring it up."

"It’s not?" Jisung asks, his cheeks beginning to heat up.

"You totally want to have a threesome with Minho and Felix!”

Jisung slams a hand in front of Changbin’s mouth, looking around the gym in panic. “Can you keep it down?!”

“Oops, sorry,” Changbin mumbles against the hand before Jisung lowers it. “I mean, you already banged Minho, and you are into Felix, so I guess it makes sense that it’d cross your mind? Is this why you’ve been so tense? Can’t handle the image in your br—" Changbin gasps. “Did they ask you?!”

Jisung just looks at Changbin, sure that his cheeks are now at least a four on a scale from one to five, one being his normal sun-kissed cheeks and five a fire red.

Then Changbin's eyes widen. "Fuck off, it already happened?!"

“Bin! Do I need to remind y—”

“Yes, yes, I’ll be quiet,” Changbin says much quieter than a moment ago, waving Jisung off. "How was it?"

Jisung whines. Changbin is looking at him with way too much enthusiasm. "Why do I do this to myself."

"Because you love me, and you'd never deprive me of such juicy gossip. Now back to the question."

"It was—good." And a whole shit-load of other things.

"Good? That's what you're going to give me?! I need details. Like who fucked who. How many dicks were in you at the same time—mouth and hole both counting. Who gives the best head, dick, whatever,” Changbin suggests, nodding thoughtfully, clearly taking the matter of dick very seriously. “Oh, I guess this means you finally got the answer!”

Jisung tilts his head, not following. “Answer to what?”

“They weren't brothers after all."

Jisung opens his mouth, to say what he isn’t sure of, but he is interrupted before he can find out.

"Wait, stop!" Changbin exclaims, waving his hands in front of him, looking alarmed. "Don't tell me! I don't want to know in case I’m wrong and they actually are."

Jisung promptly closes his mouth, not minding one bit that he doesn’t have to go into details about that.

Not even two breaths later, Changbin groans loudly. "Oh fuck, Jisung. Your silence is deafening. They are, aren't they?"

"I didn’t say anything!"

"It's when you say nothing that you say the most!” Changbin sighs but quickly changes, looking at Jisung full of amusement. “You brotherfucker.”

“You’re not funny.”

Changbin scoffs. “Hyunjin thinks I’m funny.”

“He also lets you fuck him."

Changbin smiles widely. “Yes, he does.”

Back in his room after his wonderful talk with Changbin, which was more or less just Changbin talking to himself as he went back and forth between wanting more details about the threesome but also not wanting to know anything at all about a couple of brothers “getting it on” as he put it, Jisung called it a day.

In the end, Jisung didn’t tell him much of his own accord, but still, not keeping it a secret from Changbin was a huge relief in itself. He might just need him in the future, and now there is less to dump on him in case of that.

He considers studying some more but ultimately decides to surrender himself to his bed after thinking about it for approximately two seconds. He’ll be worth nothing tomorrow without enough sleep, and he is sure he needs all the sleep he can get with his brain being overworked for more than one reason.

He knows that Felix spent his day studying as well after they exchanged a few messages earlier when Jisung sent him a few pictures of notes from their shared classes, but that was many hours ago, and now Jisung’s fingers are itching every time he looks at his phone instead of falling asleep. But then it hits him. Monday.

Monday nights are reserved for Minho, and Minho only. Always.

The one time Jisung asked Felix about it, he told him that they watch some show together, but he didn’t dare pry too much, so when Felix didn’t go into detail, he didn’t ask for more.

So now sleep doesn’t come easy. Because for all he knows, they could be fucking right now, and Jisung would have no idea.

Something ugly starts bubbling inside of him. The things Minho might be doing to Felix now that they are far away from him taking over his mind.

Maybe Minho is telling Felix how beautiful he is while sliding his hands over his soft skin.

Maybe he is whispering more sweet nothings into Felix’s ears like he heard him do before. Pushing inside him, filling him up like he and Minho had done together only a few days ago, but now they are all alone.

Then the fact he hasn’t let himself think about for a while, maybe even subconsciously let himself forget until earlier that day, creeps to the forefront of his mind. Changbin’s reaction reminded him of just how fucked up it all really is. Brothers.

He surprises himself when he lets out an involuntary moan. Why the fuck is he getting hard? He shouldn’t be. They are brothers, he knows that for certain now, and he definitely shouldn’t be getting hard to the image of two brothers fucking. Minho fucking Felix hard, and Felix moaning with every thrust.

He didn’t know that that was a fact when it happened, when he agreed to do what Felix was asking him, but thanks to Eunwoo, he knows that he would’ve done it anyway. And maybe Jisung had made his peace with that, but now, after talking to Changbin and the more he thinks about it, the more guilty he feels.

It’s absurd. An absurd situation to be in. But his brain doesn’t want to let go, Minho only fucking Felix harder in his mind, making Felix moan louder.

Without really meaning to, his hand finds its way down into his underwear, feeling just how hard he is. He slides down his fully erect length and shudders. Why is he so turned on?

Just a moment ago, it had been a whole different set of thoughts haunting him.

But now Minho is licking up Felix’s neck, teeth brushing over the sensitive skin. Felix’s eyes roll to the back of his head as he keeps moaning “hyung”, grabbing him tighter. Minho’s hand is closing around Felix’s cock, his wrist moving fast. Felix whines, desperate for release, letting go when Minho finally whispers for him to come around his hyung, and Minho fills Felix full of cum when he can’t hold back any longer.

Jisung comes hard. Harder than he expected.

He makes a mental note that he needs to change his sheets tomorrow. Sleep suddenly comes easier.

Tuesday morning starts the exact same way as the day before; looking outside and checking the weather app, but this time with a much brighter result. The forecast is still showing better conditions for driving, and part of the snow has even melted.

He goes to class with a good feeling, and an even better feeling fills his body when he gets a text from Felix saying that he expects them to drive back that evening.

Everything feels better, even the hours he spends studying because he knows that time will fly once he is busy with it, and he’ll be closer to seeing Felix again.

Sometime after dinner, he finally gets a text that Felix is on his way, sitting in the car now, and his stomach swoops. The drive would take at least a few hours, Minho having to be extra careful while driving because of the weather. So Jisung goes to bed, but there is no way he’ll be able to fall asleep. Fuck those precious extra hours of sleep.

"I can carry my bag myself. You didn’t need to walk me all the way to my room.”

Jisung’s heart starts beating faster as soon as he hears Felix’s hushed voice from outside the door, but of course, he isn't alone.

“Yes, I did,” Minho says, and something blunt hits the closed door.

“Hyung…” Felix whispers before it gets all quiet, and despite doing his best to listen, Jisung can’t hear a sound. Then he finally hears Felix again, his voice stern this time, “Minho.”

Minho lets out a low, dissatisfied whine. “You know I hate it when you call me that.”

“Better not give me a reason to call you that then,” Felix answers, sounding a bit amused.

“Fine, I’m going. Sweet dreams, Lixie.”

“Goodnight, hyung.”

A short moment later, Jisung hears footsteps fade as Minho presumably leaves, and then the door opens quietly. Felix tip-toes inside, not turning on the lights even when he closes the door and the light from the hallway isn’t there to help him see anymore, a sliver of moonlight his only source of light.

Jisung holds his breath as he watches Felix put his duffel bag down quietly, but he can’t pretend to be asleep now that Felix is finally here and whispers, “How was the drive?”

Felix swiftly turns around, and Jisung’s heart jumps. Felix’s face lit up by the moonlight, his eyes sparkling, matching his warm smile. He’s missed that smile. “Jisungie! You are still up.”

“Mhm, couldn’t sleep. Cuddle?”

Felix doesn’t hesitate and quickly dresses down till he is wearing only his t-shirt and underwear. With a big smile, Jisung lifts his duvet, thanking his earlier self that he changed the sheets as Felix gets in beside him. This is how they were, and of course, that hasn’t changed.

Felix looks at him with those big eyes that are more beautiful than any pair Jisung has ever looked into. Not just because of their physical appearance but because of how they looked at him.

Felix lifts one hand, sliding it up Jisung’s arms, making Jisung feel breathless for a moment. He missed Felix’s gentle touch. The hand finds its final destination against Jisung’s cheek. “I missed you,” Felix whispers, caressing the cheek so softly it makes Jisung’s heart flutter.

“I missed you too,” Jisung whispers back.

They look at each other for a moment, just staring into each other’s eyes in the dark, completely still. Jisung’s eyes flicker to Felix’s lips, and Jisung feels the other mirroring the action, but still no movement, only deep breaths.

Maybe Felix is thinking the same as Jisung. That if they kiss, they won’t be able to stop. But they both have to get up early, and neither of them can afford to slack off, especially Felix, who has missed some important days already.

Jisung smiles once more, before pulling Felix into his chest, not meeting any resistance from the other. Felix nuzzles in closer, and slowly their breaths get in tandem, peaceful and content in each other’s company again after being apart for the longest period of time ever since they first met.

There is so much they need to talk about, but all of that can wait. Right now, this is more than enough.

"Felix is back," Jisung blurts out as soon as Changbin picks up the phone.

"That's great, man!"

"It is! But also not. It's been three days and—nothing."

He fucked up. It has been three days since Felix returned, and all they've been doing is going to classes and studying. Granted, studying is necessary with the exams coming up next week, and Felix has some catching up to do, but still. Jisung should have kissed him that first night, the moment was there, but he didn’t, and now he’s probably lost his chance.

“Nothing what?”

"Nothing! No talk about it all, no kis—just nothing! We’ve just been at the library."

"Did you try to make a move?"

"Yes!” Jisung immediately says, pacing around the room, but then, “I mean kind of.”

"So that's a no."

"But he hasn't either… What if he doesn't want this anymore? He was home for days. Maybe he realized he just wants to be friends!"

"Sounds to me like this is a classic case of you overthinking,” Changbin suggests, annoyingly calm. And rational.

Jisung groans. “You're probably right, but—what if he really did change his mind? Or worse, what if Minho made him?"

"Jisung, do you really think Felix would let anyone make his decisions for him? Because I don’t. Not even Minho. If Felix doesn't want something that's his choice, not someone else's I'm sure."

Changbin is probably right about that as well.

Felix was the one to initiate everything that night and it has only been a week since then. He even heard him talk back to Minho before it happened and got both of them to stay with him. And when he came back he heard how he got serious again when talking to Minho. If anyone is in control of the other it’s probably Felix. But that also means that—

"So you're saying he really might not want anything to do with me?"

"Dude, stop overthinking!” Changbin exclaims, sounding a little frustrated with him now. “That's not what I'm saying at all. Anyway, who's to say he's not thinking that you're not interested in him anymore?”

"Oh."

"Yes 'oh'. Get out of your head and do something about it instead. He might just be waiting.”

He hears the door handle, Felix returning from the bathroom.

“Gotta go now. Bye, Bin!” Jisung quickly says and hurriedly puts his phone in his pocket, smiling awkwardly at Felix as he comes in through the door.

“Was that Changbin?”

“Yes, he, uhh, needed advice on something.”

“Yeah?” Felix says and sits down by his desk.

“Long story.”

Felix nods, not looking to ask any further. He turns away and opens one of the books in front of him, automatically picking up a pen that he starts biting the end of like he often does when concentrating. Already back to studying again.

Do something about it, Changbin said. But do what? Throw himself at him? No, he has to at least talk to him first. Just talk. Jisung can talk. Talking is fine. Talking is completely normal—

“Are you okay?” Felix looks up at him, eyebrows furrowed.

Shit. He’s just been staring at Felix for who knows how long. Why is he just staring? And he is still just staring, not saying anything. Say something, Jisung!

“I was just wondering… Do you want to go to the library?”

“Sure,” Felix says with a shrug of his shoulders and starts gathering his things from the desk.

Jisung, that was not it.

“We should get dinner soon,” Jisung says an hour later, notes spread out on the table they are sitting at in the library.

“Mhm,” Felix hums across from him and underlines a sentence in his book.

“What are you in the mood for? Noodles?”

Felix shrugs his shoulders, underlining another sentence.

“We can wait a bit if you’d rather we finish this chapter.”

A moment of complete silence follows, and Jisung is just about to say that maybe they should wait, but then with his eyes still on the pages of the book, Felix says, "Did you change your mind?"

Jisung looks at him confused, feeling like Felix read his mind. "About dinner? I’m okay with whatever you want.”

“No.” Felix shakes his head and looks up. "About me."

“About you? What—”

"I'm gonna go find the second edition. This one is no good," Felix interrupts him and closes the book firmly, pushing his chair back to get up.

Jisung’s brain doesn’t get a chance to catch up before Felix has already walked away, disappearing between the many bookcases. He really did fuck up. And Changbin was right. Again.

Jisung hurries up from his seat, leaving everything behind. He needs to find Felix as fast as possible. If ever there is a moment, this is it.

He doesn’t have to look for long before he spots Felix in an aisle of books that has nothing to do with any of the exams they are studying for.

“Hey,” Jisung says, approaching him quietly, not wanting to startle the other, but Felix doesn’t react at all. “Felix.”

“Is it because of Minho?” Felix whispers, focusing on his finger that he’s running down the spine of a book. “Or is it me?”

Jisung steps closer and carefully grabs Felix’s hand, holding it softly as he guides it down. “I didn’t change my mind.” If there is one thing Jisung is sure of, that is it, and he needs Felix to be sure of that as well. “I promise.”

“Then why…” Felix looks at him with big eyes, his voice still a whisper.

“Why what?”

Then, even quieter, he says, “Why didn't you kiss me?”

There is zero hesitation from Jisung. He cups Felix’s cheeks and leans in, kissing him just like he’s been longing to do ever since the last time their lips parted.

Felix is caught by surprise but quickly reciprocates the kiss, and Jisung feels his own eagerness matched, the kiss not staying soft nor subtle for long. Felix grabs Jisung by his shirt, pulling him in, and he falls back against the bookcase when their bodies collide with the force of the pull.

Their lips slide against each other, tongues joining in. Felix catches Jisung’s bottom lip between his teeth, and with a moan that drowns in the other’s mouth, Jisung pushes his thigh in between Felix's legs, not a single thought spared the public setting.

Jisung has waited for this, and now that they’ve begun, he has no thoughts of stopping. Only Felix.

Several loud bangs promptly pull them out of their private bubble. Startled, they both look at the floor beside them where there is a messy pile of open and closed books.

“Shit,” Jisung says at the reminder of where they are, staring at the mess they've made. They both look around, but no one’s in sight, and as far as they know, no one has been around to see their unhinged moment.

“We should probably save this for another place,” Felix says, chuckling. Jisung turns his head, chuckling as well, but freezes when he almost bumps noses with the other who is still so close.

Jisung’s eyes flicker to Felix’s lips, which are a deeper shade of pink now, glistening with spit. He swallows but then nods in reply and forces himself to look Felix in the eyes instead. Not that it helps much.

“Yeah. We probably should. We should also finish that chapter,” Jisung adds, breathing heavily.

Felix bites his lip and swallows deeply. “We should. And we need to talk.”

“Yes, that. Talk.”

They really should talk before anything more is to happen between them, but right now, Jisung’s whole body is screaming for him to continue where they left off, his pulse loud in his ears, and his heartbeat even louder.

The shuffling of feet finally makes them step away from each other as a student rounds the bookcase. Judging by the woman’s eyes looking at the books on the floor and then up at them, she has a pretty good idea about what was going on. Jisung flushes and hurriedly picks up all the books, putting them back in place, but doesn't spend time organizing them in the right order before pulling Felix back toward their table.

They return to their seats, sitting back down across from each other. Felix quickly opens his book, back to the page where he and Jisung left off.

Jisung picks up his pen, ready to write down more notes about the importance of biodiversity, but the words on the pages won't form any whole sentences.

Every thought keeps being interrupted by the sound of his heartbeat. His eyes are fixed on the same spot on the page for several deep breaths as he tries to calm himself down, but how can he possibly be calm when all he wants to do is crawl over the table and into Felix’s lap to kiss him again?

He discreetly lifts his head, but only just enough to get a glimpse of Felix, who is busy reading. He’s biting his lip while flipping his pen between his fingers.

Looking at Felix doesn't help Jisung at all, especially not with the way he keeps biting his lip and letting it slip between his teeth over and over. Jisung swallows. One chapter. He can finish this one chapter. If Felix can, so can he.

He forces himself to focus on the book again, more or less just writing down the text word for word, hoping that even if he can't comprehend a single word maybe his subconscious will. More than once he is about to write down words that have nothing to do with the subject. Kiss. Lips. Felix.

"Jisung," Felix suddenly says firmly, and when Jisung looks up, Felix looks very serious. "I think I'm done with the chapter."

Jisung blinks, wondering how Felix managed to finish so fast—they were both on page five out of fifteen last time he checked—but when he glances down at the open book in front of Felix it’s still showing that same page.

Felix pulls his lips into a thin line, and that’s when Jisung notices his fast breathing, chest heaving and nostrils flaring with each inhale. The pen between his fingers moves faster.

Jisung nods eagerly, Felix's true meaning not lost on him. "I think I'm done too."

Synchronized, they both stand up and stuff their things into their bags before leaving the library without another word.

Their dorm feels impossibly far away even though Jisung knows it isn't.

Felix grabs his hand when they are halfway, silently pulling him with him, forcing him to half-run across the grounds. They hurry up the stairs to their floor, Felix squeezing Jisung's hand tighter as he expertly dodges every person in their way, making no move to stop at any time.

Not until they are in front of the door to their room does he let go to fumble with his keys to unlock the door as fast as possible.

With the door closed behind them and bags dropped to the floor without care, they stand in front of each other out of breath, not even one foot separating them.

"Talk?" Felix asks, surprising Jisung, but then Felix’s eyes flicker to his lips, and Jisung’s breath hitches.

"I think talking can wait," Jisung answers quickly. Fuck, talking can wait.

"Thank God." The next moment, Jisung's back hits the door when Felix rushes forward, crashing their lips together.

It is as heated as in the library, as if they weren’t interrupted, and when Felix grinds against Jisung, it is clear why he was in such a hurry, already feeling hard.

Jisung isn't far behind, blood rushing to fill him up, meeting Felix's grinding motion, pushing against him.

Hands slide up under Jisung's shirt, and Felix mumbles "off” against Jisung's lip, pulling up the shirt. Jisung immediately complies, lifting his arms to let Felix quickly pull it over his head and throw it to the floor. Felix's shirt joins it right after, their lips and tongues attached again as soon as they can.

"Bed," Jisung breathes, and Felix steps backward with a firm hold around Jisung's neck, pulling him with him and not allowing their lips to disconnect.

Hitting the bed, Felix lies down, and Jisung follows his lead, ending on top of the other.

"Jisung..." Felix breathes when Jisung starts trailing kisses down his jaw and to his neck.

"Tell me," Jisung says, not stopping his lips.

"Want you.” Felix pushes his hips up against Jisung, who lets out a groan. He hurriedly sits back up on his heels, fumbling to open Felix’s jeans. Too impatient, Felix takes over, helping to get them off as fast as possible. Jisung gets up and pulls them off the rest of the way along with the underwear, his fully erect cock springing free.

At the sight of Felix like that, naked on his bed just for him this time, Jisung can't wait one more moment to join him and undresses himself, almost stumbling in his eagerness to get out of his pants.

Felix jumps up on his knees, pulling Jisung onto the bed and pushing him back, straddling him before hungrily devouring him again. If Jisung could kiss Felix forever, he would.

Jisung's hands slide down the sides of Felix's upper body, feeling the curve to his waist, continuing further down to his ass. Grabbing it tight, he pulls the ass cheeks apart, exposing Felix, who moans in response and pushes back against Jisung's hands, forcing Jisung to pull him even further apart.

Jisung can’t hold back a “shit” at the thought of Felix so willingly exposing himself even if he can’t see.

A long wet stripe covers Jisung's cheek the next moment, Felix giving him a dangerous look. "Fuck me, Jisung."

Felix leans over to reach into one of the drawers of his nightstand and then hands Jisung a small bottle of lube.

Jisung takes a moment to just look up at Felix. His hands move up, thumbs pressing into the soft flesh above his hip bones as he looks him over.

"What?" Felix asks when Jisung makes no move to grab the bottle he’s holding out.

"Do you have any idea how sexy you are?"

Felix blushes, and once again, Jisung is baffled by how he can look both adorable and sexy as hell at the same time.

"Shut up,” Felix says, his cheeks pink and with a slight pout. Then, looking determined, he pushes the lube right in front of Jisung's face. "Now."

Jisung holds back a chuckle and takes the lube, uncapping it with his thumb. Then he grabs Felix's ass with his other hand, so hard Felix falls forward onto his hands.

His fingers slide in between his ass cheeks, brushing over his hole. "It'll be cold."

"I don't care." Felix connects their lips again, and when Jisung blindly squeezes out a dollop of lube between his asscheeks, Felix moans. Jisung quickly drops the bottle and catches the dripping lube with two fingers before it can glide down too far.

He slides his fingers up the cleft to Felix's pulsing hole, dipping the tip of his index inside. With another moan, Felix pushes back, forcing the finger to slide in a little more.

It isn’t an ideal position by any means, Jisung’s ability to reach behind Felix limited, but most of his finger is quickly enveloped and he has to take a moment to steady his breathing. There is nothing more he wants than to feel all of Felix again.

He pulls out his finger, and without warning, he easily flips Felix onto his back, switching their positions. The thought of being able to do exactly that with Felix has been his biggest source of motivation at the gym.

Felix’s surprised expression is all the validation he needs. Wide eyes and mouth open, looking up at him. Jisung smirks, and then he is pulled down by the neck, Felix’s lips aggressively pushing against his. “If I’m sexy, then you are hot as hell,” Felix breathes when he lets go again.

Jisung chuckles. “Deal.”

After another kiss, he gets up on his knees between Felix’s legs and grabs the lube from the floor where it landed just moments ago before pushing up Felix’s knees.

It’s a completely new angle to see Felix from. Last time, Minho was the one to get Felix ready, but now, Felix is all for him, his hole waiting just for him.

Changing his plans, he makes Felix gasp as he pulls him up higher by the hips, getting him close enough to land a wet stripe right over his hole. The sound it elicits from Felix is one of the sweetest sounds Jisung has ever heard, his cock twitching with want. He licks again, circles it, playing in and around it. He is sure that he could spend hours just doing that if given permission.

“Jisung,” Felix whines, giving Jisung a desperate look when he looks down at him from between his knees.

The way he is looking up at him is absolutely mesmerizing, and Jisung’s hunger grows. He gives one last lick and lowers Felix again, before dousing his fingers with lube and pressing his index finger inside again. Another one quickly joins, Felix letting out a string of “yesyesyes” as Jisung fucks them in and out of him. Felix’s whole body jolts when they graze his prostate, squeezing tight around his fingers while he moans, “More.”

Jisung starts purposefully hitting Felix’s prostate, making him whine and writhe under him, and he pushes in another finger, watching the hole dilate deliciously as they disappear inside.

“Need you now,” Felix breathes and grabs Jisung’s arm, digging his fingers into it.

Jisung stops and with a deep exhale says, “Need you too.” He pulls out the fingers, leaving Felix to clench around nothing. “Let me just get—”

“I’m clean,” Felix blurts out, interrupting Jisung who was just about to get off the bed to find a condom. “So is hyung. Only been with you.”

Jisung freezes. There it is. Hyung. The one thing that is truly between him and Felix. The one person that Jisung doesn’t understand at all. But as much as Jisung hates the reminder of Minho’s role in all of this, this is a situation where he can easily forgive him being mentioned. “Me too.”

He surges forward, kissing Felix after their lips have been left abandoned for too long, quickly erasing any thoughts about a third person who is part of the mess.

It’s desperate, Felix burying his hands in Jisung’s hair, grabbing it tight, as their cocks brush against each other, leaving both of them even more desirous.

“Jisung…”

Jisung sits up, quickly drenching himself with lube, and without further hesitation, he guides his cock to Felix’s hole. It glides in, the head disappearing, making both of them gasp.

Looking dazed, Felix nods, and Jisung continues pushing forward, making him light-headed as he watches all of him be encased so clearly.

Pushing Felix’s knees up higher, he starts moving.

Looking at Felix is everything. He is such a beautiful mess already, moaning, looking more and more fucked out the harder Jisung thrusts.

A hard aggressive knock makes both of them freeze. Then they swiftly turn their heads toward the wall beside them before looking back at each other, laughing. Okay, so they’d forgotten the lack of privacy even in their own room.

Jisung leans forward, brushing his nose over Felix's cheek as he whispers, “Do you want to turn around and have me fuck you into the mattress?”

A guttural sound escapes Felix. “Fuck, yes.”

Jisung pulls out, but instead of letting Felix turn on his own, he flips him around onto his knees with one quick grab of his hips. He rushes to his bed and grabs his pillow, placing it underneath Felix, whose leaking dick immediately stains it.

With a hand between Felix’s shoulder blades, he pushes him down, forcing his face into the other pillow on the bed, and then with a firm grip on his hips, Jisung slides inside him again.

He'd love to take Felix like that, loudly slam himself against him, letting the sound of skin meeting skin echo off the walls with every thrust, but Jisung is not going to start a potential war with their neighbor already.

Instead, he lowers their hips together, lying almost flat on top of Felix. He gives it an experimental thrust in the new position with Felix’s cock rubbing flat against his pillow.

“Fuck,” Felix lets out loudly.

“Shh,” Jisung shushes into his ear with a smile on his lips.

Felix angles his face slightly, burying his mouth into the pillow to muffle himself.

Jisung starts again, the sound of his thrusts quieter as he hoped they would be after the switch. Still, it quickly gets messy and sweaty, Jisung’s chest sliding against Felix’s back as he struggles to hold back.

The creaking of the bed is less quiet, but any thought of being discreet slowly disappears as he watches Felix. Felix doesn't have to say anything with the way the corners of his eyes crinkle and how he is biting his lip. Jisung knows exactly where he has him.

“Don’t stop,” Felix breathes into the pillow and bites into the fabric, his hands clawing at the sheets.

He doesn’t stop, and soon Felix’s stifled moans sound as he comes underneath him. Jisung sinks his teeth into Felix’s shoulder, keeping his own moans quiet when his orgasm is triggered by the other.

Jisung quickly lets go again, and his teeth are replaced by soft lips, kissing the spot that shows faint markings that will soon fade.

He would love to just stay connected like that, but he doesn’t have the strength to not crush Felix for long and pulls out, laying down beside Felix instead and pulling him in for a lazy kiss.

Felix looks breathtaking with his puckered lips and flushed cheeks; dazed-looking eyes and messy hair. Jisung can do nothing but smile. Felix pecks him on the nose, smiling, too.

He caresses Felix on the cheek, and Felix starts drawing soothing circles on his chest with a finger. Jisung always enjoys the silence in Felix’s company, but this one would have to be his favorite ever.

But eventually, one of them has to speak and bring up what they’ve postponed.

“Jisung, do—”

"Are you—”

They start at the same time but then snort at the timing.

“You start,” Felix beats Jisung to it.

It’s not that he particularly wants to be the one to start—or finish the question he was about to ask at all—but they have to begin somewhere. “Are you gonna tell Minho?”

Jisung isn't stupid. He knows that just because of what happened today it doesn't mean that Minho is out of the equation. It just means that Jisung is still a part of it. It’s a simple question that should have a simple answer.

Felix nods. “I promised hyung no more secrets,” he says, looking at Jisung. "I'll promise you no more secrets, too."

Jisung nods as well. Simple answer. Like he expected. "While you were home, did you and Minho—?" No more secrets. He might as well get confirmation now they started the conversation.

Felix shakes his head this time. "Never at home."

That answer he does not expect at all. In his head, Minho and Felix have been all over each other, not able to keep their hands to themselves, but now that Felix said it, keeping their hands to themselves sounds like the only right answer while under the same roof as their parents. There has to be limits. Right?

“How do you think he'll feel about this?”

Felix grimaces. “He won't love it, but that’s his problem. He can hardly be mad after you two hooked up repeatedly behind my back.”

Jisung's stomach sinks. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. I promise. I had enough time to get used to the thought when I first realized what was going on. And then I figured that maybe… I know it's complicated, and I don't expect you to just be okay with everything, but—" Felix bites his bottom lip, swallowing the rest of his sentence.

"But what?"

Felix’s face softens completely, his eyes shining. "I really do like you, Jisung."

Jisung can’t help but smile. “I really like you, too, Felix. And I wanted to kiss you so bad ever since you got back.”

“Why didn’t you?”

“Because I’m stupid?” Jisung raises an eyebrow. “You could have done it too, you know!”

“I can’t be the one to start it every time!”

“You haven’t—oh.” Now that he thinks about it, it was more or less Felix who made a move every time. “Well, I thought you might have changed your mind!”

”And I thought maybe you changed yours!”

Jisung pulls Felix in by the neck, letting their lips meet briefly. “I definitely didn’t.”

“I didn’t either.” Felix giggles but then looks down, drawing circles again. "There's something I wanted to ask you."

"Yeah?"

"Would you want to come visit during the break? My mom is very curious about my amazing roommate."

Jisung's ears suddenly feel very hot. "You told her about me?"

Felix looks up, smiling. "How could I not? So, do you want to?"

Despite finally giving in and fucking, focusing on studying for the rest of the weekend doesn’t get any easier. Too quickly, they find themselves back in bed, mouths all over each other’s bodies.

“We can’t keep doing this,” Felix breathes, his stomach moving under Jisung’s lips, where he’s leaving a wet trail.

Jisung stops by his belly button and groans. “I know. This is no good.”

“We need to make some rules. Just until exams are over.”

Jisung looks up at Felix from below him, his fingers hooked around the elastic band of his sweatpants, itching to pull them down. “Right. Rules. Like not being allowed to do this.” Jisung licks a long stripe along the hem of the sweatpants, and Felix gasps, his hips jerking.

“Jisung!” Felix says and smacks the top of his head. “Yes, none of that!”

“Gotcha.” Jisung chuckles and crawls up to catch Felix’s lips with his own, the other not doing the slightest to try and resist. “Is kissing allowed?” Jisung asks when he pulls back, already feeling breathless.

“Yes, but also no,” Felix says, grimacing. “Kissing leads to other stuff.”

Jisung laughs. “Okay, no other stuff for now and only very limited kissing. Maybe we just need to change the setting,” he says, looking around the room for a moment. “To somewhere with fewer beds.”

Felix snorts and nods. “Back to the library?”

They make it to the library but not without ending up against the door to their room for a few heated minutes and breathlessly pulling apart again before finally opening the door. But now they sit opposite each other by one of the wide tables after deeming it too dangerous to sit beside each other.

It works. At least for a while.

“How long have we been here for?” Jisung asks after finishing revising another chapter.

“At least a few hours,” Felix says, then looks at his phone. “Well, almost. One hour and forty minutes.”

Jisung groans, leaning back in his seat stretching. He feels Felix’s eyes on him, and when he looks, his eyes are staring hungrily at the exposed sliver of skin where his shirt is lifted up.

Jisung quickly drops his arms. “Short break?”

Felix nods then gets up, grabbing Jisung’s hand and dragging him with him to an empty corner of the library. Jisung is soon pressed back against the end of a bookcase, their lips attached, making a mess of each other.

“You’re vibrating,” Jisung breathes when he suddenly feels vibrations against his thigh.

“Uh-huh,” Felix answers and continues kissing Jisung as if he doesn’t register what Jisung is saying.

The vibrations stop, and Jisung forgets all about it until it starts again, interrupting their tongues tasting every corner of each other’s mouths.

“Your phone,” Jisung tries again, and Felix gets it this time, stopping to pull out the vibrating phone from his pocket.

“It’s Minho-hyung,” Felix says, and Jisung’s stomach lurches.

Felix steps back, answering the call when he checks that there’s no one near him to disturb. “Hi, hyung,” he says quietly.

Jisung can’t hear what Minho says, but it’s not difficult to guess based on Felix’s answer.

“At the library.” Felix pauses, and then Minho says something before Felix adds, “About to suck Jisung off.”

Jisung chokes. Felix can be unexpectedly blunt. Very blunt. Even with Minho. Not that what Felix said was true. He wouldn’t do that here, not in the middle of the library. He thinks.

Felix snorts. “Hyung, what do you think I’m doing at the library?” Pause. “Yes, he is.” Another pause. “Why?” Felix sighs then suddenly hands Jisung the phone. “Hyung wants to speak to you.”

Jisung raises a questioning eyebrow, but Felix just shrugs his shoulders. It feels like a bad idea, but the easiest way to find out what Minho wants is to answer.

“Hello?” Jisung says, and Felix steps closer, leaning in to listen.

“If Felix fails any of his exams I’m holding you accountable. Stop distracting him,” Minho immediately says.

“I’m not—”

“Give me back to Felix.”

Jisung scoffs but hands the phone back to Felix, not at all sad to end their conversation early.

“Hyung, stop it. We’ve—I’ve got it under control. Working my ass off as we speak.”

Jisung can’t hear Minho again, but after a bit, Felix smiles.

“You know I will. Bye, hyung.” Felix hangs up and looks at Jisung, rolling his eyes. “I swear he’s got a sixth sense or something. It’s like he could feel me slacking off for a moment.”

Jisung snorts. “I mean, you were apparently about to suck me off in the library.”

Felix laughs. “I guess I shouldn’t then. Hyung might just show up next. Breathe over my shoulder, making sure I study.”

“Yeah, I’d rather not tempt faith if that’s the risk.”

Felix leans in and kisses Jisung much softer this time. “Better get back then.”

He takes Jisung’s hand, and they get back to their seats and all of their open books.

“You weren’t actually going to suck me off, were you?” Jisung whispers, leaning over the table.

Felix smirks, shrugging a shoulder. “I guess we’ll never know.”

Felix will be the death of him.

Minho’s threat turns out to work surprisingly well for the rest of the weekend. They get into a nice flow without too many “breaks” and much less “stuff” going on. At night, they hold each other close, heads tired, and their lips keep each other occupied only for a bit before they succumb to sleep.

Then Monday comes around, and Jisung is reminded how much he hates Mondays. Because even though they’ve got an exam on Tuesday morning, Felix still disappears in the evening.

“Don’t stay up waiting for me. Even though I’m pretty sure hyung will be kicking me out before it gets too late. But please, get the sleep you need,” Felix says and pecks Jisung on the lips.

“If you promise to come cuddle me even if I’ve fallen asleep.”

Felix smiles and pecks Jisung on the nose this time. “Deal.”

Jisung smiles, and Felix leaves.

Jisung really fucking hates Mondays. But as promised, Felix snuggles in beside him when he returns, holding him tight. And even though Felix smells of Minho, Jisung hates Mondays a little less.

The exams pass by, some feeling like they went better than others, and when Jisung says goodbye to Felix before heading home for the holidays, Felix makes him promise once more to visit. That’s why Jisung is now sitting on the train on his way to Felix’s hometown.

Felix lives about as far away from the university as Jisung does, only in the opposite direction, so it’s not a short ride, and with each stop he feels more and more uneasy, nervously watching the snowy scenery fly by outside the window.

It’s been a week since they said goodbye. A week that he’s spent at home with his family, and even though they’ve been in contact with each other in one way or another every day, it’s with a rapidly beating heart that he approaches his final stop.

He spent a few days hanging out with Changbin, but as soon as Changbin’s parents would let go of him, he was on his way to Hyunjin, just like Jisung is now on his way to Felix.

Jisung looks up at the screen again, as if he hasn’t done that twenty times already, confirming that the next stop is where he has to get off. He gets a text from Felix, telling him that he’s waiting for him on the platform already.

He taps his fingers nervously against the armrest until he can’t sit still anymore and picks up his bag, standing in front of the automatic doors way too early.

Finally, the train comes to a halt, and all that’s left is for him to step outside.

He barely gets a chance to look for Felix before out of the corner of his eyes a blurry figure is coming towards him at full speed, knocking the air out of him as it crashes into him.

“Jisungie!” Felix exclaims, holding him tight as he buries his face in the crook of his neck. “I missed you.”

Jisung laughs and relaxes into the embrace, wrapping his arms around Felix. “Missed you too, Felix.”

They stand like that for at least a minute before Felix loosens his hold on him only to kiss Jisung long and hard instead.

Feeling Felix’s lips again is heavenly, and Jisung forgets all about time and place for a moment. He misses them the second they disappear.

“Let’s get going,” Felix says, taking Jisung’s hand. “Mom made a special dinner in your honor.”

Jisung blushes. “She really didn’t have to do that.”

“You try and tell her that.” Felix chuckles, and they start walking.

Jisung hasn’t thought about how they’ll get from the train station to Felix’s house—doesn’t even know how far it is—but he quickly finds out. There, leaning against the familiar blue car, is Minho.

Minho uncrosses his arms as they approach him, straightening up. Somehow, Jisung had managed to forget about him for a while with Felix being the only thing on his mind. It’s been several weeks since he was last anywhere near Minho, too. The last time being that morning after their shared night with Felix.

“Hey, Freshman,” Minho says and nods, with something that isn’t quite a smile on his lips.

“Hey, Minho,” Jisung returns the greeting, nodding as well.

“You can throw it in the back,” Minho says, walking around to the trunk of the car, opening it. Jisung throws his bag in, and Minho slams it shut.

“I’ll sit in the back with Jisung,” Felix says when Minho holds the door to the front seat open for him.

“Whatever you want, Lixie,” Minho says with a soft smile directed at him, but as soon as they get inside the car, Jisung swears that he sees Minho scowling at him in the rearview mirror.

Is this how it’s going to be for his stay at the Lees? He can only hope that Minho won’t be around for the full five days of his stay.

Felix holds his hand for the whole ride, asking Jisung about what he’s been up to and how Changbin is doing; he hasn’t received any more embarrassing pictures of Jisung from him, but now he’s loudly considering if maybe he should ask for some (Jisung really hopes he won’t).

About ten minutes later, they drive into a nice-looking neighborhood with pretty two-story houses. All of the driveways are neatly cleared of snow, and Christmas lights blinking prettily.

Minho turns up the driveway to a cute pastel yellow house that looks homey and inviting.

Minho hands Jisung his bag, but Felix snatches it from him as they walk to the front door.

They don’t get to knock before the door opens. A woman, who can only be related to Felix with all her many freckles showing, greets them with a big smile.

“Jisung! How wonderful to finally meet you!” she says and gives him a hug. It’s warm and cozy, just like Felix’s.

“Mom, don’t scare him away already.” Felix laughs, and she lets go of him again.

“Thank you for having me,” Jisung says and steps inside when she gestures for him to do so.

“Are you hungry? Felix told me it was a long train ride so I prepared a little dinner.”

“Sounds lovely,” Jisung says and smiles genuinely at the warm welcome.

She beams and ushers him through the house to the kitchen, where Jisung’s eyes widen when he spots the dining room table overflowing with different dishes and banchan.

He looks at Felix in disbelief, who grins and lifts a shoulder silently saying “I told you so”.

All four of them sit down to eat, and everything tastes absolutely delicious. From the fried fish to the spicy tofu stew, to the various sorts of homemade kimchi and soy-marinated eggs.

He’s halfway through his second bowl of stew when he hears the front door, and a moment later, a man steps into the room.

“Hi, honey, Jisung is here!” their mom immediately says.

He smiles at his wife, then his eyes find Jisung. “So it would seem.”

Jisung hurries to get up, but their dad gestures for him to sit down again.

“Sit, sit, no need to get up on my account,” he says and takes a seat at the end of the table.

Jisung sits down again, feeling slightly unsure, but bows his head in his direction. “Nice to meet you, Mr. Lee.”

“You too, Jisung. How’s the food?”

“Amazing!” Jisung says enthusiastically but then his cheeks heat up, feeling a little too self-conscious at his loud response.

Mr. Lee chuckles. “Glad to hear. We do have a wonderful cook in the family. Two, actually. Pass me the eggs, dear,” he says the last bit to his wife and then looks back at Jisung asking, “Do you know our Minho too?”

“No,” Minho says before Jisung gets the chance to answer the question himself. Jisung swiftly turns his head toward him, but Minho doesn’t spare him a glance.

“Soccer, perhaps, isn’t your thing? Minho is on the school team.”

“Oh yeah, Felix took me to a few games.” Jisung nods.

“Of course he did.” Their dad smiles again and then digs into the food, scooping up some rice. Jisung deems it safe to continue eating his stew.

It’s a nice dinner with some easy small talk and questions about college life and being roommates with Felix, but mostly, Jisung just listens to the family’s casual conversation after their mom shushes her husband for asking Jisung too many questions and not letting him eat.

When Jisung feels fuller than full, and Mrs. Lee can’t tempt Jisung to eat anything more, a yawn escapes him.

“You must be tired after your journey. I prepared sleeping arrangements for you in Felix’s room. Let me know if there’s anything else you need,” she says, smiling as big as ever.

“He can have my room,” Minho then quickly says. “I’m fine with sleeping on the floor in Felix’s room.”

Their mom smiles at him, her eyes crinkling at the corners. “You are sweet, dear, but I’m sure the roommates don’t mind sleeping together.” She turns to look at Jisung and Felix, and they both nod. “Now, please make yourself at home! If you get hungry, there’s always food in the fridge.”

Jisung has a feeling that Minho’s sweet offer wasn’t all that sweet, but Minho aside, he is honestly overwhelmed by the kindness from the Lees, and it’s not hard to see where Felix gets his warmth from (he briefly wonders what went wrong with Minho).

He thanks them again for letting him stay, and then he follows Felix out of the kitchen. Felix picks up Jisung’s bag from the hallway and leads him up the stairs to the first floor.

There are a few doors, four as far as Jisung can tell, but Felix goes straight for the first one at the top of the stairs.

“This is my room.” Felix opens the door, revealing a cozy setting of a bed and a mattress on the floor, all set up and looking very inviting for a good night’s sleep. By the window, there’s a desk, and in one corner, there’s a tall wardrobe.

Felix drops Jisung’s bag to the floor and flips on a switch that turns on a string of fairy lights hanging from a long shelf that’s full of manga and manhwa over his bed. On another wall, there’s a pinboard with photos attached to it, and Jisung immediately spots one of the selfies they’ve taken together. Several of the other pictures are with Minho.

“You can have the bed,” Felix says as he puts the bag on the floor. “I really don’t mind.”

“Mattress looks good.” Jisung smiles and walks over to throw himself on top of it because it does look good. And it is.

Felix closes the door and joins him, lying down beside him.

“You think we’ll need it?” Jisung asks because lately, they’ve barely slept a full night without cuddling close despite the small beds at the dorm.

“Maybe,” Felix says, intertwining their fingers as he leans in to kiss Jisung. It’s soft, and Jisung clings desperately to each press of lips against his own, but Felix backs away way too soon. “It’s just that—”

Felix doesn’t finish his sentence, just grimaces, so Jisung finishes for him. “Minho.”

Felix nods. “I just don't want to make him feel like I put him aside just because you are here.”

Jisung lets out an affirmative grunt, nodding. He understands, even though he wishes that he didn’t. No matter how much he hates the current “arrangement”, that’s how it is.

Felix bites his bottom lip, looking thoughtful, then says, “I know we haven't talked about it but I was kind of hoping that you two might get to know each other? Now that we're all under the same roof for the next few days.”

Jisung hopes that his face doesn’t reveal his true feelings when he hears Felix’s suggestion. There’s not a single part of him that wants to do that, because lately, Minho hasn’t given him any reason why he should, but for Felix’s sake he nods. “I guess we could give it a shot. If Minho wants to.”

“Don’t worry about hyung!” Felix beams, his eyes full of light for a moment before getting serious again. “Also, about mom and dad… I didn't go into any details about us. I think maybe mom figured out that there’s more to it than just being roommates but I don’t know.”

“That’s okay,” Jisung says, nodding. “I get that it can be a lot.”

“And if I’m lying all close to you it’s going to be really hard not to kiss you, and we’ve already established that kissing quickly leads to other stuff. I just never did anything like that here, you know how I told you that me and hyung never…” Felix gives him an apologetic look and drops his head. “I’m sorry, Jisungie.”

Jisung gently lifts Felix’s head with a finger under his chin. “It’s okay. I didn’t come here for that. Well not just that.” Jisung chuckles, then smiles softly. “Felix, I promise it's okay.”

Felix looks at him with big glistening eyes. “Really?”

“Really,” Jisung says, and then instinctively leans in, but before his lips can touch Felix’s, he swiftly pulls back. “So no kissing?” Jisung hopes that that’s not the case because the thought of not kissing Felix for the next five days sounds like torture.

“I mean, there has to be some kissing, obviously. I’m not that strong while having you around. Just—gentle kisses.”

“Like—” Jisung says and then he kisses Felix as gently and softly as he can, their lips barely touching at times. He feels the way Felix breathes hotly against him, wanting more, his eyes fluttering shut.

When Jisung pulls back, it takes a moment before Felix opens his eyes. “Okay, maybe gentle isn’t the right word,” he breathes.

“Yeah, maybe not,” Jisung has to agree, his whole body tingling.

They lay silently for a moment, just looking into each other’s eyes, with nothing but the sound of their breathing filling the room. Then their quiet moment is interrupted by a knock on the door, and the door opens without permission. Minho, of course.

His eyes land on them on the floor, but he looks at them uninterested.

“Mom told me to bring you this,” he says and throws a gray towel on top of Jisung without much care. Then he turns to Felix, his face melting into something much softer with an almost vulnerable look in his eyes.

Felix immediately jumps up from the floor, approaches him, and brings a hand up to cup Minho’s cheek. Minho leans into the touch, closing his eyes, and his lips form into a subtle smile.

“Goodnight, hyung,” Felix says softly, caressing his cheek.

Jisung’s stomach swoops unpleasantly, and he feels like he should look away, but then Felix drops his hand, and Minho opens his eyes, quickly finding his composure.

“Goodnight, Lixie.” Then with a short look at Jisung and an exhale through his nose, he says, “Night, freshman.”

He walks away before Jisung can respond, leaving the door open. Deliberately, Jisung is sure.

Felix turns around to Jisung, rolling his eyes. “I’ve tried telling him to stop calling you that, but hyung can be stubborn sometimes.” Somehow Jisung does not doubt that at all. Felix sighs, looking a little hopeless, and Jisung wants to reach out, to hold him, but then the next moment Felix smiles. “Grab your toothbrush. I’ll show you to the bathroom.”

Out in the hallway, Felix points to each door on the floor, explaining that the next door is the bathroom and the one after that leads to Minho’s room. The room on the opposite side belongs to their parents.

They get ready for bed, and a little later they both get cozy under the covers; Felix on the bed and Jisung on the mattress on the floor. It’s weird not having Felix beside him when he’s that close, but Jisung would never force Felix to do anything he isn’t comfortable with. Besides, sleeping in the same room as Felix is still much better than what he’s been doing the past week completely without him.

“Are you really gonna stay up there?” Jisung still asks, after a goodnight kiss that is way too brief.

“Yes,” Felix says with a pout, not looking very satisfied with that decision at all. “I don’t trust myself around you.” Jisung can’t help but giggle at that, and Felix looks amused at his own words, too. Then he turns off the fairy lights.

“Goodnight, Felix.”

“Goodnight, Jisungie.”

Jisung is quickly drifting off, plenty tired after a long day, when a low rustle reaches his ears. Then a pair of cold feet slide under his duvet. Jisung smiles into the dark as he lifts the duvet, and Felix finds his favorite spot in his arms.

“‘Morning, Li—Oh, right, you're here.”

Jisung quickly pulls on his shirt when he hears Minho's voice, and when his head pops through the neck hole, the other is standing in the doorway, scowling.

“Good morning to you too,” Jisung says with as much joy in his voice as Minho—which is none.

“Where's Felix?” Minho asks, ignoring Jisung's words, stepping inside the room and looking around.

“I'm not hiding him from you,” Jisung deadpans. “He's in the bathroom.”

“Tell him I went for a run,” Minho says, and Jisung notices his outfit consisting of a sports hoodie of sorts and a pair of shorts because, of course, Minho is one of those insane types that'll go for a run in bare legs even in the winter.

He does a double take on Minho's thighs which are annoyingly muscular like always. Or maybe not like always, because they weren't all that annoying before.

Jisung grimaces. He hasn't exactly been keeping up with his own gym routine lately.

Minho shakes his head as if he knows what’s going on in Jisung’s head and then leaves without another word.

Jisung scoffs. His day had started out much better, finally waking up next to Felix again, his arms wrapped around him, but it only took a minute in Minho's presence to put a damper on that.

For reasons that have absolutely nothing to do with Minho and his ridiculously fit physique, Jisung gets down on the floor for some push-ups.

It’s about twenty repetitions later that a shadow appears and he stops.

“Never mind me,” Felix says, happily, “I'm just enjoying the show.”

Jisung snorts, shaking his head, but does another ten repetitions before getting up from the floor.

“That might just be more dangerous than kissing.” Felix smirks as he walks over and then with a hand on each of Jisung's arms, he squeezes his biceps.

“Dangerous you say?” Jisung raises an eyebrow and enjoys the gasp from Felix when he flexes his muscles underneath his hands.

Felix glances back at the open door then with a push to Jisung’s chest, he backs him against the wardrobe. He opens the wardrobe door that Jisung isn't pressed against, shielding them, out of view from anyone that might peek inside the room.

Felix kisses him almost hungrily, and Jisung's hands instinctively move up under Felix's shirt, grabbing his naked waist. Felix pushes his tongue inside Jisung's mouth, not looking to stop, and Jisung’s pulse rapidly rises.

“Felix,” Jisung mumbles into the other’s mouth, because he needs to stop this before it gets too out of hand, especially with the open door.

It does the trick, and Felix drops his hands, pulling back, his lips looking so wonderfully puckered already, that they are practically screaming for Jisung to pull him back in.

“Oops, not even a day here and I'm already losing my own game,” Felix says with a giggle, then pecks Jisung on the nose. “Let's get some breakfast.”

Jisung nods but then his cheeks heat up. “Just give me a, uhm, minute to—yeah.”

Felix giggles again but lets Jisung take the deep breaths needed to lower his pulse and make sure he won't be walking into the kitchen half hard.

“Good morning!” Mrs. Lee greets them brightly when they enter the kitchen. She's standing by the kitchen counter rolling some rice balls, placing them neatly in a container. “I hope you slept well, Jisung.”

Jisung smiles. “I slept great, thank you.”

She beams, then starts mentioning a whole long list of foods for Jisung to choose from for breakfast. “We've of course got fresh rice in the cooker. Or if you want porridge I'll whip some up right away.”

Overwhelmed by the many choices, Jisung takes a moment to think and ends up with a bowl of the stew from yesterday that he couldn't get enough of and a bowl of rice.

“I wonder where hyung is,” Felix says in between spoonfuls of hot stew.

Jisung shrugs his shoulders and keeps his eyes on the food in front of him, filling his mouth with a spoonful of rice.

“Mom, have you seen hyung?”

“No, dear. Probably still asleep.”

Felix shakes his head. “No, I checked his room. Empty except for Doongie loafing on the bed.”

Right, they have cats. Three to be exact.

“Maybe he was called in for an early shift,” she then suggests.

“Yeah, maybe.”

“I made you some snacks to take with you today,” Mrs. Lee says as she places a box in front of them. Through the transparent lid, Jisung sees the rice balls she was making and some cut-up fruit.

“Thank you, mom!” Felix says. “But we’ll probably be going to a café though.”

She waves a hand at him. “Take it with you anyway. You never know when you’ll get hungry. It’ll keep fresh in the cold weather.”

The plan for today is a tour around town, Felix being very excited to show Jisung everything there is. He’s already mentioned how they’ll need to stop by the bakery that makes the best twisted doughnuts, and they might stop by his favorite place for some green tea bingsu. Now that Jisung is thinking about it, taking some savory rice balls with them doesn’t sound like such a bad idea with the amount of sugar they’ll probably end up inhaling throughout the day.

“Thank you so much,” Jisung says with a little bow of his head, taking the box.

“I’ll be off to work now. I hope you enjoy your day!” She smiles and leaves the kitchen, but then pops her head in again for a moment. “Remember to put on an extra layer, the cold is no joke!”

Jisung didn’t get much chance to look around the house when he arrived late yesterday but now in the daylight, he takes it all in. From the kitchen there’s a big doorway with a pair of open glass doors he doubts are ever closed, leading into the living room.

The living room is bright. The big couch in front of the TV is full of pillows in pastel colors. At one end of the room is one big bookcase covering the whole wall, full of books all coordinated by color instead of by author, and on a few of the shelves in between there are various trinkets, looking like they come from different parts of the world. There’s a big puffy armchair right by it and a small lamp making up a cozy reading corner.

In one corner there’s a cat tower, and he’s pretty sure someone is sleeping inside one of the caves, but the last thing Jisung wants to do is to disturb someone peacefully asleep so he doesn’t go any closer.

The hallway is adorned with family photos all over the walls. Jisung decides to take a look now that he has the chance while waiting for Felix to get ready.

In one picture two young boys are fishing. In another picture next to it, Minho is holding a fish with a big smile on his face, and next to him, Felix is smiling even brighter showing off a fish that’s not even half the size of Minho’s.

Felix’s smile makes Jisung smile. Not much has changed in that department, his smiles today are just as bright. There’s only a hint of freckles on his cheeks that must have gotten more prominent because of sun exposure through the years.

An even younger Felix is smiling at him in another picture. He can’t be much older than two. He’s waving, sitting in his mother’s lap who’s sitting on a picnic blanket on the bright green grass, wearing a red dress. In another picture, Felix is on his dad’s shoulders, and there’s one where he has food all over his face looking very pleased with himself. Felix is all over the wall.

Jisung sees a wedding picture of their parents too as he looks at each of them, continuing along the wall up the stairs. There’s a family picture that looks very recent, all four of them smiling widely to the camera.

He sees Minho and Felix side by side with backpacks on, Minho’s arm over Felix’s shoulders. Felix’s smile looks a little less convincing in this one. First day of school if Jisung were to guess.

A picture of a baby crawling that when Jisung looks at the eyes and nose he has no doubt is Felix.

It’s impossible for Jisung not to smile at every stage of Felix he sees.

Minho is on the wall plenty as well of course. Standing with a soccer ball under one foot with a confident look, his arms crossed. Another one with a participation trophy in his hands, then further up the stairs, he’s looking at least a few years older with a much bigger trophy in the midst of other boys his age, all of them in the same sports jersey.

The pictures end when he gets to the top of the stairs and it’s perfectly timed with Felix appearing from his room after a change of clothes.

They descend the stairs together and go to the front door. While in the middle of bundling up in thick padded jackets, it suddenly opens from the outside.

“Hyung! Where’ve you been?” Felix asks but then takes in Minho as he steps inside. “Out for a run?”

Minho raises an eyebrow. “He didn’t—” he starts but then glances at Jisung with a roll of his eyes. “Never mind. Yeah, I went for a run. You’re on your way now?”

“Yep! Gonna show Jisung all the best places.”

“Sounds great,” Minho says, smiling softly at him. “Did you put on enough clothes? It’s still freezing outside.”

“Says you, running around in shorts!” Minho ignores him and reaches past him to grab a scarf. He then wraps it securely around Felix’s neck who shrieks. “Your hands are cold!”

“Sorry,” Minho says, chuckling, then pecks Felix on the forehead. “Have fun.”

“We will,” Felix says happily.

“Bring him home in one piece,” Minho says, as he walks past Jisung toward the kitchen with not even a hint of a smile on his face.

“Always,” Jisung answers, dryly.

Felix doesn’t seem fazed by their interaction at all, and it quickly becomes clear to Jisung why as he follows his gaze that’s glued to Minho’s back and thighs which are dripping with sweat.

Obviously, Jisung gets it, but it’s hard to feel any type of positive emotions toward Minho when he constantly feels like competition.

Jisung shakes himself out of it. He’s going to have Felix’s undivided attention today without Minho’s disapproving look haunting him. He takes Felix’s hand when Minho disappears into the kitchen, and Felix immediately smiles at him.

“Ready?”

Jisung nods. “Let’s go.”

They spend a lovely day together, and they do end up getting both the twisted doughnuts and the matcha bingsu they of course split. After the cold dessert, they have a cup of hot chocolate to-go for a walk through a park.

It’s not a big town, but cozy and welcoming just like the Lees. As they walk, Felix greets several elderly people, and just like the baker and the woman who owns the bingsu place did, they ask him how college is going and tell him to say “hi” to his parents which Felix always promises to do. Felix of course makes sure to introduce Jisung to each person as well, and they greet him warmly, the baker even giving them an extra twisted doughnut on the house.

“Do you know everyone here?” Jisung says, chuckling, after they wave goodbye to a man by a small flower shop right outside the park.

Felix thinks for a moment, jokingly or not Jisung isn’t sure, then says, “Maybe?”

Jisung chuckles. “I mean, who wouldn’t want to know you?”

Felix smiles but then timidly says, “Actually, I didn’t have a whole lot of friends in school. I was too shy.”

“Oh.” Jisung doesn’t know what else to say, his heart breaking a little at the thought of the smiling boy in the pictures possibly playing all by himself.

Felix shakes his head and his smile returns. “But I had hyung. And at some point, I figured I didn’t really need anyone else. In high school, I had friends of course, but I never really got to know any of them that well. Then hyung went away to college and I struggled for a bit. I kept going to the same places we used to go together because I didn’t know where else to go, and suddenly I’d find myself talking to the regulars and the owners. And then when I visited hyung at college I suddenly felt more confident and started talking to everyone at the parties and now I know every person in the frat!” Felix excitedly finishes.

Felix slides a hand into the pocket where Jisung is shielding his own hand from the cold and squeezes it. It fills Jisung with more warmth than the padded jacket does.

They haven’t been holding hands much while walking around town, only under the table while eating bingsu or for a brief fleeting moment. Jisung didn’t expect them to after what Felix said about not telling his parents much, but that doesn’t mean that the urge hasn’t been there every second.

“But you already knew that the story had a happy ending,” Felix says, his eyes sparkling.

“I’m happy it does.” Jisung smiles, looking fondly into Felix’s eyes. He wishes he could just lean in and kiss him.

Maybe Felix knows because he sighs and gives his hand another squeeze before pulling it out of the pocket. “Ready to head back?”

When they get back, Minho’s blue car is nowhere to be seen, and Jisung can’t help but feel relieved at that. Should he feel bad about thinking like that? Maybe. But again, Minho hasn’t given him a single reason to want to be in his vicinity—on the contrary.

It’s not until Felix puts the small backpack he was wearing on the floor, that they remember what’s in it. They immediately sit down by the dining table, eating every rice ball they’d forgotten about. Still fresh, just like their mom said.

After that, they head up to Felix’s room, and they barely sit down on the bed before Felix leans in to kiss Jisung. Jisung feels like a person that’s been deprived of oxygen and Felix is breathing life into him.

Despite everything that Felix said the previous night, he soon pushes Jisung onto his back, crawling on top of him, deepening the kisses.

“God, this is horrible,” Felix breathes. “I’m used to controlling myself around hyung, but you—” he kisses Jisung again, tasting him like a man deprived.

He doesn’t make any move to stop, and why would Jisung deny Felix this when this is what he himself wants the most? But just as he slides a hand up under Felix’s shirt, there’s the sound of someone clearing their throat. Jisung would bet all of his savings that he knows exactly who is the cause of the interruption.

Felix immediately pulls back, sitting on the edge of the bed, and Jisung follows.

“Mom and Dad will be home late. I’m in charge of dinner tonight.” Minho doesn’t hover in the doorway but quickly leaves, not bothering to close the door.

Felix's lips are pressed into a thin line. Then he turns to Jisung with a soft hand on his thigh. “I’ll be right back.” He leaves, and Jisung falls back onto the bed with a deep sigh as he’s left alone with his thoughts.

Jisung knows why Felix had to suddenly leave. Minho’s ego obviously couldn’t handle the sight of them and now Felix has to—do whatever he has to do to make him feel good again. Never at home. Does kissing count?

A green monster inside of him slowly grows into something that feels nothing like himself, snarling and growling.

He doesn’t doubt that Minho knows exactly what to do to get Felix’s attention.

How do people handle feelings like this? Maybe the answer is that they just don’t. That they feel just as hopeless in a situation like this. Except he doubts that anyone has been in the exact same situation that he is in. This one has to count as out of the ordinary.

Felix is gone for a while, way longer than Jisung would like. Ten minutes? Twenty? He’s not exactly sure, he just knows that he doesn’t like it one bit. But finally, Felix reappears.

“Want to help with dinner?”

Jisung’s honest answer is no because he really shouldn’t be allowed in the kitchen, but when Felix asks there’s really only one answer. “Of course!”

“Did no one ever teach you how to cut a carrot?” Minho asks, his tone harsh, as soon as Felix leaves for the bathroom. He gives the cut-up carrots in front of Jisung a displeased look. Jisung honestly tried to do a very careful job julienning the carrots, but the strips are definitely thicker than he would have liked.

“Sorry, chef,” Jisung says with a bite. “I’ll try harder.”

He doesn’t. He’s so freaking annoyed after concentrating so much that he ends up doing an even worse job, and if it’s on purpose just to spite Minho, no one has to know.

Minho scoffs when he’s handed the finished carrots, looking like he’s ready to say something that Jisung would surely love to hear, but Felix returns and Minho puts them in the frying pan without further comment.

“Anything else you would like me to do?” Jisung asks Minho with as much honey in his voice as he can muster, making sure that Minho catches the insincerity right away.

“No.”

“Hyung…” Felix says quietly, putting a hand on Minho’s shoulder.

Minho takes a deep breath through his nose, then hands Jisung the spatula in his hand. “I trust someone taught you how to stir?”

It’s amazing that they manage to finish cooking without killing each other, finally sitting down to eat some neatly plated bibimbap (Minho didn’t let Jisung anywhere near that part).

They eat in relative silence, tension still in the air, and Jisung would feel bad for Felix if he wasn’t so distracted by his absolute dislike of sitting across from Minho.

There’s an awkward moment when Felix says, “Could one of you give me—” and before he can finish the sentence, both Minho and Jisung grab whatever is nearest—Jisung a bottle of soda and Minho the small bowl with extra bibimbap sauce—holding it out to him. Felix just gives them a weird look and stands up to reach for a napkin himself.

After dinner, their mom comes home, and she smiles happily at the leftovers Minho saved for her and their dad (Jisung regrets his poor job with the carrots slightly). She insists that she’ll tidy up the kitchen since they made dinner, waving them out of there to do something fun instead, now that Jisung is visiting. On their way out, Jisung makes sure to let her know that the rice balls were delicious, and she beams.

Felix suggests that the three of them play a board game but Minho is quick to say that he's got other stuff to do and disappears into his room (Jisung’s insides let out a scream of joy). Somehow they end up starting a 1000 piece puzzle instead of a board game, sitting on the mattress on the floor with the puzzle in front of them.

They've been at it for an hour, pieces sorted in piles of color everywhere on the floor, when Felix goes to grab them something to drink, and Jisung takes the chance to check up on any texts he might have received.

There's a text from Changbin, asking him how it's going along with a picture of him with Hyunjin, who's leaning his head on his shoulder. He begins typing a reply, when the door suddenly moves and a white and orange cat pokes its head inside the room.

It stares at him, and Jisung dares do nothing else but stare back. Then it enters the room, stepping over the puzzle pieces.

“Hey, kitty,” Jisung says softly and puts a hand forward for the cat to sniff. “You must be Soonie.”

Even though it's long ago, Jisung still remembers the name from back when Felix showed him a whole bunch of pictures of the three cats living in the house.

Soonie apprehensively gives Jisung's hand a sniff but a moment later, he pushes his head against his hand. Jisung immediately gives the cat some gentle scratches around the head, and Soonie seems pleased, pushing for more.

“Oh, Soonie came to say hi!” Felix says happily when he returns with two mugs of hot cocoa. Soonie turns his attention to Felix at the sound of his voice, pushing against Felix's legs, snaking his way in between them a few times.

Felix puts down the mugs on his desk all the while Soonie follows him around the room, and when he sits down beside Jisung, Soonie jumps right into his lap.

“Looks like he approved of you,” Felix says, petting the cat that purrs contentedly in response.

“He’s a cutie,” Jisung says with a smile, then tilts his head at Felix when he remembers. “You made it sound like they were Minho’s back then?”

“Mhm. They kind of are. It’s his fault we got them after all. One day hyung suddenly got very secretive, and wouldn’t let me into his room which was very uncharacteristic of him. I was always welcome before at any time of the day, so one evening when he wasn’t home I snuck inside and I found little Soonie. I felt so betrayed that he didn’t let me in on the secret that I immediately told on him to our parents. Hyung cried, begging them to let him keep Soonie. It’s one of the few times I’ve ever seen him cry, and I felt so bad for telling on him. But they quickly budged as long as hyung promised that he’d be the main caretaker.”

Minho crying. Now there’s a mental image Jisung can’t picture. Maybe Minho was less—Minho when he was younger.

“But then Soonie got so much attention from hyung it almost drove me crazy. I was so jealous!” Felix exclaims and raises his eyebrows in disbelief at his past self, shaking his head. “Like can you imagine someone being jealous of a cat? Of this cute little furball?! But it was bad. So much so that I refused to acknowledge Soonie’s existence altogether, and hyung was so busy taking care of him that I don’t think he even noticed, which didn’t help. But then hyung went away for soccer camp and one night it was thundering outside. I would always just slip into bed beside hyung to be able to fall asleep but then suddenly Soonie came into my room, and as if he knew I needed some company he jumped up beside me, immediately settling down. And that was it. I was sold.”

He looks up at Jisung, smiling fondly at the memory.

“With Doongie they were quickly convinced that Soonie could use a friend since hyung had taken such good care of him,” he continues, his fingers carding the orange and white fur. “Then he brought Dori home. Our parents adored the two others already and one more addition to the family wouldn’t hurt, but they did make hyung promise that that was it, especially since he would be going to college in a couple of years. But yeah, that’s how we got three more mouths to feed! Mom is really happy about it now that we’re both off to college. She says that it makes the house feel less empty.”

Jisung nods. He can imagine that. They got Bbama at home too. “That’s nice.”

“Yeah, they live a pretty good life here. They still mainly hang out in hyung’s room, especially when he’s home, and it's full of toys and stuff. It used to be this room before I took over after hyung left for college. But Soonie still jumps up into my bed whenever he senses that I need him and hyung isn’t home,” Felix says and lifts Soonie, burying his nose in the fluffy fur, nuzzling it. “Isn’t that right, Soon?”

The cat’s face gets squished but still looks content in Felix’s arms. When he lowers him, Jisung offers Soonie his hand, who after a quick sniff lets him pet his head again.

“There you are, Soon-ah!”

Jisung quickly retracts his hand, and Soonie jumps out of Felix’s lap with a meow as if he knows that Minho is talking to him. Minho doesn’t hesitate to enter, bending down to pick him up in his arms.

It’s the briefest glance as he straightens up, but the look Minho gives Jisung is enough to send a cold shiver down his spine. He doesn’t hover, but leaves after a much softer look directed at Felix.

Note to self, Jisung: stay away from the cats.

They don’t continue the puzzle, but decide to put on yet another Marvel movie while enjoying their hot cocoa, leaving the puzzle pieces scattered all over the floor for another time. As they cuddle close on Felix’s bed, it doesn't take long before Felix’s body against Jisung feels heavier, and Jisung softly boops Felix on the nose, waking him from his slumber so they can go wash up.

Felix disappears for a bit after that, and Jisung has to take a few deep breaths as he lies in bed alone, but when Felix returns, it’s without hesitation that he gets in right beside him.

Jisung sleeps well that night, and he wakes up smiling with his chest pressed against Felix’s warm back, holding him tight. But then it only takes one small wiggle from Felix in his sleep, pushing his ass back, for Jisung to realize that he’s very much hard.

Jisung grunts. Waking up next to Felix hard shouldn’t be an issue, but since Felix has said that he doesn’t feel comfortable with anything too intimate happening between them while in the same house as their parents, Jisung is not about to make it Felix’s problem in any way.

He carefully releases his hold on Felix and gets out of bed, quietly stepping out of the room and into the bathroom next door. He can just quickly take care of it here. No big deal.

He pulls down his underwear, letting his cock spring free, but then he catches a glimpse of himself in the mirror and it’s too fucking awkward to just jerk himself off right there.

He strips down completely instead and jumps into the shower, getting under a relaxing warm stream to take care of his problem where any evidence will quickly be washed away. He grabs himself, stroking his cock a few times but then stops. He sighs and drops his hand, the back of his head leaning back against the wet tiles. Too fucking awkward. He’s a guest, and jerking himself off in the Lees’ bathroom, and with Felix so close by too, just feels wrong even behind a locked door.

He lets out a shriek when he turns on the cold water, focusing on the uncomfortable feeling as his body cools down too fast, but it gets the job done, no boner in sight anymore. If Felix can wait till they are back on campus, so can he. He’s not that needy. Yet.

He dresses himself and returns to Felix’s room, quietly opening the door so as not to disturb the other sleeping, but when he opens the door, Felix half jumps up, looking startled.

Before Jisung can fully process the scene, Felix smiles at him and relaxes his head on top of Minho's chest again. Minho is lying where Jisung was barely 10 minutes ago, propped up against the headboard with Felix looking comfortable draped over him.

“Hey, Jisungie,” Felix says sleepily, and makes a grabby hand gesture toward him. “Come join.”

Jisung stares at them frozen. Felix wants him to what exactly? Go lie down with him and Minho? But then Minho scratches Felix’s head, moving to get up, and Felix lets him. “Tell me when you want to leave, okay?”

“Okay, hyung.” Felix smiles, his eyes barely half-open.

Minho walks past Jisung without looking at him, and it takes all of Jisung not to bump his shoulder into him. He turns to close the door behind the older, a grimace on his face and an unpleasant feeling deep in his stomach.

“Are you coming?”

Felix's voice pulls Jisung out of the growing unpleasantness, and when he turns to look at him, it’s all it takes for his body to relax again. He doesn’t hesitate to get back in his spot beside Felix, pulling him in tight. Felix hums happily.

“Where are you going?” Jisung asks while carding his fingers through Felix’s soft locks, remembering Minho’s last comment before leaving.

“The arcade!” Felix says cheerily, finally sounding like he’s ready to wake up. “I thought we could go there today if you want. Hyung will drive us.”

Hyung will drive us.

“Sounds great,” Jisung says and pecks Felix on the forehead before he can say anything else.

It’s not great.

If Jisung had known exactly what “hyung will drive us” entailed, maybe he would’ve tried to sway Felix to do something else, because “hyung will drive us” actually means “Minho is joining us at the arcade”.

Playing games at the arcade should be fun—it usually is!—but competing against Minho is not. Not only is Minho crazy competitive, but he is also infuriatingly good at a lot of the games. It’s pretty clear that he and Felix have been coming here a lot.

Playing against Felix is still fun though, because Felix is more focused on laughing than winning. Right now, the two of them are sitting at one of the driving car games, racing against each other, Felix laughing loudly when his car crashes, and when Jisung wins the round, Felix pecks him on the cheek, smiling.

It leaves a warm lingering stain on his cheek, and for a moment Jisung forgets about anything else, but then Minho takes Felix’s seat.

Jisung could point out the obvious disadvantages he’s got against Minho like the fact that Minho actually got a driver’s license and he doesn’t, but where would be the honor in that?

It quickly feels like a race between life and death between them. Jisung's knuckles turn pale with how tightly he’s gripping the wheel. He’s so focused on beating Minho, his eyes glued to his racecar on the screen, that he can’t even make out the words from Felix cheering behind them.

“Ha!” Jisung lets out loudly when he manages to ram into Minho’s car, throwing him off, but the joy is short-lived because Minho recovers in no time, doing some wild U-turn, and Jisung’s brief moment of celebration is enough to shake his own focus. Minho wins. Of course, he fucking wins.

“Hyung! That was so cool!” Felix says and embraces Minho from behind, just as Minho sends Jisung a mocking smile.

They check out the Dance Dance Revolution machines next, and Jisung watches as Felix and Minho move in perfect sync. There’s no chance he’s attempting that. The risk of him making a fool of himself is entirely too high. When Minho gets a high score, it shows several “LMH98” on the board already.

Jisung has never had a less joyful time at an arcade before. The only positives are the fleeting moments where Jisung can pretend that Minho doesn’t exist when the latter goes to the bathroom or to buy drinks, giving him a few minutes with Felix alone.

He feels exhausted when they get back to the house. What Felix undoubtedly hoped would be a good time for Jisung and Minho to get closer, has only made Jisung want to stay further away from the other. He closes the door to Felix’s room, falling back onto the bed to breathe in peace. He feels like he might just explode.

Just two more days, Jisung. You can do it.

“Bin, I think I might actually be going insane,” Jisung says as soon as Changbin greets him with a “Hey, dude!”.

Changbin chuckles. “Are the brothers too much for you?”

Jisung glances nervously at the closed door before he whispers, “Minho is fucking insufferable. I barely dare touch Felix in front of him!”

“Oof. That sounds tough.”

“You can’t even imagine.”

“Why not go home? You’ll see Felix back at campus soon anyway.”

“Being with Felix when Minho isn’t there is amazing,” Jisung says honestly then sighs. “I like him so much, Bin.”

“You sound serious about him.”

“Yeah…”

“How are they around each other? Do they—no, wait, I don’t want any details about what they might be doing. Sorry, the brother thing still weirds me out.”

“I get it. Anyway, they aren’t doing anything. There’s just this—vibe around them.”

“So no fucking?”

“No, fucking.”

“Like none of you?”

“Nope.”

There’s a short pause after that where Jisung contemplates the frustrating situation he’s in, then Changbin says, “Feeling a little pent up maybe?”

“No,” Jisung replies too fast, effectively revealing that, yes, maybe he is a little pent up.

“Oh! I know what you need!” Changbin exclaims like he just got the best idea ever. “You and Minho just need to fuck it out! Like you used to. Relieve some tension.”

“Oh my god, Bin, I’m not gonna fuck Minho!” Jisung says, outraged at the suggestion. His eyes widen, realizing that he was maybe a little too loud, and glances at the door anxiously before he much quieter says, “That’s literally the last thing I want to do. When I tell you he’s insufferable, I mean it. He gets on my nerves all the time, and he’s not even trying to hide that he’s doing it on purpose.”

“Fine fine, no fucking Minho. To be honest, I still get shivers down my spine just thinking about being in the same room as him. But at least you’ll get a break soon! You’re still coming back for the New Year’s Eve party at the frat, right?”

“Yeah, we’re still coming. I can’t wait to be back at the dorm, just me and Felix. I just gotta find a way to survive until then.” Jisung lets out a deep exhale. “And figure out how to endure the drive back to campus with Minho. How about you? How’s Hyunjin?” he asks, happy to move on from the topic of Minho.

“He’s amazing. We’re having sooo much sex. I swear he’s insatia—”

Jisung hangs up.

(He does however pick up when Changbin calls him right after, and after Changbin promises not to go into more detail about their sex life he doesn’t hang up again.)

Their mom has prepared an even nicer dinner that evening than the day he arrived. She and their father will be leaving the next morning to visit family and won’t be coming back till New Year’s Eve to be with the cats since Jisung, Felix, and Minho will be driving back to campus in time for the party.

It’s a wonderful evening, eating and chatting with the Lees, and after dinner, they all play a board game. Jisung once again gets the confirmation that their parents are truly lovely people and they couldn’t possibly have made him feel more welcome and at home.

“Jisung, it’s been so lovely to meet you! I’m so happy to know that Felix got you,” their mom says happily the next day as she and their father are on their way out the door. “Please continue to take good care of each other, okay?”

Jisung assures her that of course they will, and she beams, giving him a warm hug. Mr. Lee shakes his hand, thanking him for visiting, a big smile on his face as well. Then they bid their final farewells to their kids and go out the door.

Jisung hears the car doors close and soon the sound of the car driving off, leaving the three of them alone in the house for the next few days.

“Do you want to watch a movie?” Felix asks, looking from Jisung to Minho and back again.

“Sure, Lixie,” Minho says with that sweet voice that is for Felix only (and that Jisung absolutely loathes). Jisung nods.

“You two find a movie. I’m gonna go look for snacks!” Felix says and hurries to the kitchen.

The two of them go to the living room and Minho picks up the remote, browsing through the never-ending selection of movies to stream without a word.

How exactly are they supposed to agree on anything? Jisung doesn’t doubt that Minho will hate every single thing he might suggest, it’s much better to just stay quiet. Minho is making zero effort to include him anyway.

“We might need to make a trip to the store!” Felix yells from the kitchen a few minutes later and then appears in the open doorway. He holds up a bag of chips and a small bag of M&M’s. “I’m not happy with this selection. I need my chocolate raisins.”

“Yeah, that’s no good,” Minho says after a look at the items in Felix’s hands. “Do you want to walk or drive?”

“Walk. A little air would be good.” Felix nods thoughtfully then looks at Jisung. “You okay to walk, Jisungie?”

“Sounds good,” Jisung says, nodding. “Let me just grab an extra shirt before we go.” He won’t survive a walk in the cold with just a t-shirt under his padded jacket.

He quickly sprints up the stairs to Felix’s room and grabs a hoodie he borrowed from Felix the other day when they were out. Felix had insisted that he put on something warmer than the slightly thinner hoodie Jisung brought with him for his stay (he didn’t have the biggest selection at home, leaving most of his clothes at the dorm before going home for the winter break).

“What are you doing?”

Jisung pulls the hoodie on and raises an eyebrow at Minho who doesn’t linger in the doorway but steps inside, getting uncomfortably close. “Putting on a hoodie because it’s cold outside?” Jisung suggests, pointing out the obvious scenario.

Minho looks at him with a stone-cold expression as he nods down at the hoodie. “Where’d you get that one?”

“This?” Jisung asks, pulling at the hoodie confused. “Felix lent it to me.”

“It’s mine,” Minho says, his face turning spiteful. “I gave it to him.”

“If you gave it to him it’s not really yours anymore is it?” Jisung deadpans, tilting his head, but Minho doesn’t look amused.

“Take it off.”

Jisung scoffs. “You know what,” he says and pulls the hoodie over his head. “Take it. Wouldn’t want to wear it anyway.”

He harshly pushes the hoodie into Minho’s arms, forcing him to take a step back. Minho just stares at him with a disgusted look on his face as if he can’t believe he just did that.

“What? Not enough?” Jisung raises his voice, finally having had enough, and proceeds to pull off his t-shirt. “Why don’t you take this too!”

“Stop! Just stop!”

Jisung freezes mid-throw, both he and Minho swiftly turning their heads with their eyes wide, looking at Felix.

“I have had enough of the both of you!” Felix shouts, not holding back. Jisung’s arm drops to his side, clutching the shirt in his hand.

Jisung hasn’t really seen Felix angry, except for the time when he heard him yell at Minho before they all ended up in bed together but it’s not something he ever wanted to experience again, because right now, sweet, adorable Felix is frightening, to say the least. Maybe it’s the stark contrast to his usual happy self that makes it so spine-chilling. Minho doesn’t seem to be enjoying it either, looking just as startled as himself.

“Do you think I haven’t noticed every time? ‘You think it’s fun to be in the same room as you two with your constant silent fighting right in front of me? Is it really too much to expect you to be nice to each other?!” Felix gives both of them a stern look, his face growing red. “I don’t care how, but figure out a way to get along! I’m going for a walk, and when I come back you better be treating each other better!”

He swiftly turns around and closes the door firmly behind him. Then there’s a sound that Jisung doesn’t like at all because he’s pretty sure it’s the sound of a key turning. He’s locked inside with Minho.

“Great,” Minho says, gesturing to the locked door. “Now look at what you've done.”

“What I have done?” Jisung asks incredulously, pulling on his shirt again. “You've got to be kidding me.”

“This is all your fault!” Minho says, throwing his hands in the air.

“My fault? How is this my fault?”

“You should never have come!”

“In case you didn’t notice I was invited!”

“I don’t care! As if it wasn't bad enough already, but no you just had to come into my home and shove it in my face,” Minho snaps. “I'm not the one invading your home, being all over Felix in front of you.”

“So when Felix invited me I was just supposed to say no?”

“Exactly.”

Jisung huffs, shaking his head. “You are unbelievable.”

“Listen, we had fun one night the three of us but now I will just have to learn to deal with the thought of you two together because, for some unexplainable reason, Felix insists on having you around.”

“Do you think I enjoy having you around? Having your eyes on my every move like a hawk? I can barely breathe when I’m near Felix without you looking like you are ready to send me to my grave!”

“Well, maybe you should just leave then!”

“You fucking wish!”

“Yes, I do!”

“You didn’t even want him!” Jisung then yells. “Too busy fucking me at every party.”

“You were nothing but a distraction. A convenience. A way to keep myself away. Do you want to know why I can't stand the sight of you? Me and Lix, we can never be more than a secret.”

“Well that’s not my problem, is it? Would you even have taken him back if it wasn’t for me? If you didn’t know that he wanted me?” Jisung snaps. “Just how fucked up are you?”

“You know nothing about us! And you do not get to call me that after you got right into the middle of this! You are no better,” Minho says through clenched teeth and pokes a finger into Jisung’s chest. “You fucked me too remember? Then you suddenly decided to go after Felix instead. And now I apparently just have to get used to your annoying ass all the time!”

“Well, it's not like I’m a huge fan of your bubbly personality either!”

“Fuck you!” Minho yells right into Jisung’s face, close enough for his hot breath to hit him.

“Never had a problem doing that before did you!”

Minho’s breath is hot on Jisung’s face but he doesn’t care, his fists clenched and his jaw tense, determined not to be the one to back down. He digs his nails into his palms, the urge to throw a punch at that aggravating face in front of him overwhelming even though he’s never been in a fight in his life.

But Minho… Fucking Minho. He really might just—

There’s only a flicker of a warning as Minho glances down and Jisung does the same. Then they crash together.

It shouldn’t make sense, and it’s fucking annoying that Changbin might have been right again.

Their lips aggressively fight in place of their fists, teeth coming out to bite as their mouths devour each other, and their hands bury harshly in each other’s hair without care.

Both of their shirts are pulled off in a hurry, thrown to the floor, and then Jisung's back hits the wall hard enough to knock the wind out of him for a moment.

Minho starts fumbling with Jisung’s belt and opens his jeans, palming Jisung firmly through his underwear while he looks at him like he’s still ready to throw him across the room.

Jisung holds his breath in response to the vulnerable situation he’s in but quickly returns the gesture, sliding his hand down into Minho's sweats, feeling his cock that is as hard as his own.

Jisung exhales and squeezes Minho a little harder than should be comfortable. “You gonna fuck me now?”

Without warning he is pulled free of the wall, and there's a loud crash from books landing on the floor before he finds himself bent over the desk by the window.

Minho pushes down Jisung’s jeans and underwear, letting them drop to the floor around his ankles, displaying his bare ass. Next Jisung gasps out loud at a resounding slap followed by a sting on his right asscheek. “Yes, I'm gonna fuck you now.”

Jisung’s hole clenches in response, then looking over his shoulder at Minho, he swiftly says, “Left side pocket, black duffel bag.”

“Stay,” Minho demands, disappearing from behind him, but he quickly returns, throwing a condom on the desk and uncapping a bottle of lube from Jisung’s bag.

Cold liquid slides down between his asscheeks, and the open bottle of lube appears beside the condom on the desk. The lube is spread around and over his asshole, and then a finger slowly but firmly slides inside him, stretching him an agonizingly little amount compared to what he really wants.

Minho takes longer than Jisung would've liked before he pushes in a second one, his fingers pathetically small for this, really, but then he hooks his fingers, hitting Jisung’s prostate just right and Jisung takes back his internal notion about Minho's fingers possibly being inadequate.

His fingers get rough, his other hand squeezing one of Jisung's butt cheeks, spreading them apart, as he buries them to the knuckles over and over again. A third finger enters without any protests from Jisung, too busy whining whenever they teasingly push and brush over his prostate.

Minho abruptly pulls them out, leaving Jisung feeling painfully empty as he looks back at Minho, who hurriedly pulls down his sweats and underwear, revealing his hard cock which he strokes a few times before grabbing the condom and tearing it open with his teeth.

“I fuck Felix raw,” Jisung says, knowing very well that his choice of words is provoking, so when Minho's nostrils flare and he narrows his eyes at him he can't help but feel satisfied.

“Asshole,” Minho replies immediately and Jisung smirks, taking the win.

“Right here,” Jisung says cheekily, wiggling his ass.

Minho drops the open condom pack to the floor and grabs the lube instead, thoroughly lubing himself up before making contact with Jisung’s asshole. Minho isn't gentle as he pushes inside but he isn’t exactly careless either, nevertheless, Jisung isn't complaining as he feels the emptiness disappear.

“You good?” Minho asks somewhat to Jisung's surprise when he’s buried to the hilt, holding still.

“Just peachy,” Jisung says, a little strained as he feels his asshole pulse around Minho's dick, stretched far wider than the fingers managed.

Minho scoffs loudly. “You are such a fucking brat.”

“Bet you like it,” Jisung shoots back cockily, but then he is pulled harshly by the hair from behind, forcing his upper body up off of the desk, head pulled back.

“I like nothing about you,” Minho hisses into his ear.

“Am I supposed to feel offended by that, Mr. Bubbly Personality?” Jisung’s voice comes out hoarse with his neck stretched backward, but he has a triumphant smile on his face as he tries to turn his head just enough to look Minho teasingly in the eye. “Also your hard dick in my ass begs to differ.”

“Do you ever shut up?”

“No. But you could try and make—”

Minho twists his head around to smash their lips together. Jisung almost feels drunk, feeling dizzy from all the conflicting emotions going through him as Minho kisses him heatedly and messily, making him want more despite it being Minho.

He suddenly lets go of his grip on his hair, and unprepared, Jisung barely catches himself with his hands on the desk, leaning forward onto his elbows. With a firm grip on Jisung's hips, Minho starts fucking him, the desk soon shaking with every thrust accompanied by the sound of several more things falling to the floor.

Jisung soon has to get down flat on the desk, his chest sliding against the hard surface as he gets sweaty, his fingertips clawing around the edge of it, trying to hold his body still.

Jisung hates to admit it, but being pounded over a desk by Minho feels really fucking good.

It's been a hot minute since he last had a dick inside him—the last time being with Minho months ago—and even if he absolutely loves fucking Felix, he can’t deny that some part of him has missed the stretch. Feeling completely full.

Minho is firm and relentless with his thrusts, and Jisung's knuckles turn white with his hard grip. They never fucked without a condom before and it’s ridiculous how different it feels. Minho’s naked cock, splitting him apart, making sure that he’ll feel it for hours after. Because he’ll undoubtedly be feeling this later.

A bird flying close by the window suddenly reminds Jisung where they are. It must be a lewd view for any passerby down on the street if they take a good look up at the window on the first floor.

Minho doesn’t slow down, clearly not caring about anyone seeing them at all, or maybe he just knows that you can’t see much from the street anyway. Regardless, it only adds to the experience, to the lewdness of being fucked mercilessly by Minho over a desk.

Jisung can’t keep quiet, isn’t trying to by any means, but moans loudly at every jolt through his body, whimpering at the deep pleasure and the slight burn as Minho keeps fucking him.

Minho lets out a loud “fuck” and grabs Jisung’s hips even harder, pulling him toward him as he pushes inside, their bodies colliding loudly as skin slams against skin.

Jisung’s climax is approaching fast and the need to touch himself is getting desperate, if he could only reach—

Minho comes and frantically empties himself inside Jisung, then with his final thrust, he pushes impossibly deeper inside Jisung where he stays, and quickly grabs Jisung’s cock. He barely needs to touch Jisung before he spills onto the floor, his eyes rolling to the back of his head.

“Shit,” Jisung breathes when Minho lets go of him, falling limp on top of the desk.

He feels Minho heavy against his back as he collapses on top of him, their bodies flush with each other, his dick still buried inside him. He allows a few deep breaths but it’s still Minho after all, so he can’t keep silent for long.

“You can pull out now,” Jisung says exhausted, the added weight making it harder to breathe.

Minho scoffs as he lifts himself free, standing up straight. “Give a man a second to catch his breath. I did all the work.”

Minho reaches to the side, his fingers reaching for something Jisung can’t see. With a grunt, he finally seems to catch it and puts a box of tissues on the desk. He pulls out a few of the tissues, and Jisung feels Minho’s cock slip out of him.

“I’d say sorry for the mess, but you asked for it,” Minho says, shrugging his shoulders.

Jisung huffs and his asshole clenches, but cum doesn’t drip down his thighs. Jisung reaches a hand behind him and takes over the tissues Minho is holding against him. It’s almost too considerate. “Thanks.”

Minho steps back, tucking himself away, while Jisung grabs a few more tissues, before pulling up his underwear and jeans. Yeah, he’ll be feeling this for at least the rest of the day.

“Let me be very clear about one thing,” Minho says, picking up his shirt from the floor. “No matter what this might have indicated, I do not want to date you.”

Jisung lets out a loud laugh. ”I definitely don’t want to date you either!” he answers, finding his own shirt and pulling it on. “But I’m not giving up on Felix.”

”Well, obviously I won’t either.”

“I guess that means we’ll have to figure out something else then. We could just—fake it.”

“Fake it?” Minho looks at him unimpressed and puts a few of the fallen books back on the desk.

“Get along and date each other for Felix’s sake,” Jisung elaborates as he wipes up his cum from the floor, wincing slightly as he bends down (but keeps it as quiet as possible because Minho doesn’t need to know the impact he had). “Or whatever it is that he hopes for, but without actually dating each other.”

“That is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard,” Minho says, putting a pencil holder back in its place.

“You got something better?” Jisung raises an eyebrow, waiting for any other possibility to present itself. It’s not like he particularly wants to do this.

There’s a long pause where Minho just stares at him, then he sighs, shaking his head as he runs a hand through his hair. “I can’t believe I’m stuck with you, freshman.”

Jisung rolls his eyes. “Maybe start by not calling me that. Wouldn’t be very convincing to Felix.”

“The things I do for him… Fine, jagi.“

Jisung grimaces at the pet name that’s not any better than freshman—he might actually prefer that over anything sweet like jagi. “Maybe just say ‘Jisung’.”

“Rules,” Minho says, giving him a stern look. “I still get my Monday nights. No interruptions.”

“Fine. I still get all other weeknights at the dorm anyway,” Jisung says, smugly. He’s obviously got the better deal to begin with.

Minho’s jaw visibly tenses, but then he says, “Weekends?”

“What about them?”

“Felix will probably expect all three of us to hang out. Spend time together.”

Jisung shrugs his shoulders. “So we will. Whatever Felix wants. While pretending we get along. Sex?”

“Felix? Whatever we do behind closed doors is none of the other’s business. With each other?” Minho says, mulling it over for a second before saying, “If necessary.”

“Fine with me.” Jisung nods. “Anything else?”

“I think we’ve covered it.”

“Good.”

“Good.”

They stare at each other, blinking, waiting for the other to turn away, but Jisung is not going to be the one. But then the sound of the front door closing, followed by quick footsteps up the stairs, makes both of them whip their heads toward the door just like earlier. A second later, the door to Felix’s room is unlocked and Felix appears in the doorway with a white plastic bag in one hand, eyes flickering between the two of them.

Then Minho does the most unexpected thing and grabs Jisung’s hand, holding it tight. “We made up.”

Holding hands with Minho is weird and unsettling, and Jisung honestly wishes he’d let go.

Felix looks at their joined hands and then back up at their faces. The white plastic bag drops from Felix’s fingers. “You fucked, didn’t you?”

Jisung’s hand tenses at the same time as Minho’s does, but then Felix squeals and lunges forward, catching both of them in his arms. Jisung’s hand is finally freed from Minho’s disturbing grasp.

When Felix steps back again, he picks up the plastic bag, beaming. “I bought snacks! Ready for that movie?”

Jisung glances discretely to the side, where Minho’s hand is placed on top of Felix’s on his thigh.

Jisung shouldn’t complain. He’s got Felix right there beside him too, after all. But try and tell that to his uneasy stomach. At least the living room couch is big enough for all three of them.

Minho rakes his fingers in between Felix’s. Squeezes. Jisung really should look away.

As if Felix knows that Jisung’s attention isn’t solely on the movie currently playing on the TV, he turns his head where it’s currently resting on Jisung’s shoulder. Felix looks up at him, his eyes big and shiny, and Jisung can’t keep himself from pecking him on the forehead. Jisung is immediately rewarded with a smile that makes warmth flow anew through his body, before Felix turns his head to the movie again.

Jisung is pretty sure he isn’t just imagining the annoyed twitch at the corner of Minho’s mouth, and it makes the warmth inside him even better.

He hasn’t been concentrating much on the movie at all so far—he’s honestly not even sure what it’s about. In an attempt to seem very civilized to each other, Jisung let Minho pick the movie, which Minho happily did. But even if Jisung had been the one to pick it, he probably wouldn’t have been able to focus on it anyway.

For starters, it’s been barely an hour since he was willingly pounded over a desk. Which happens to also mean that he has a pretty sore asshole at the moment. It’s a little distracting, to say the least, and with every stinging movement, he has to keep his face in check to not give Minho the satisfaction of knowing just how much it stings. He’d enjoy that entirely too much.

Then there’s the part about them now having to pretend like they get along.

It was his own damn idea, but he has no idea how he’s supposed to pull that off. Thankfully, they’ll be back on campus soon, which means much less Minho and much more Felix. Until then, he just needs to fight the urge to piss off Minho by doing something stupid like kissing Felix breathless in front of him.

Also, yeah, they fucked. He is stupidly into Felix, but he let Minho fuck him. Try and make sense of that. Blame sexual frustration from being too pent-up and the suffocating tension between him and Minho because of their sexual history and mutual dislike for one another.

It’s not that he exactly regrets that it happened. Call it a necessary albeit pleasurable evil for them to “bury the hatchet” or whatever this is.

Of course, he would never hurt Felix, no matter the amount of frustration. If it wasn’t for the fact that Jisung knew that Felix would be weirdly okay with it—or even let out a squeal of joy—he never would’ve let it happen. It was for his sake, really! Still, it’s pretty fucked up. But it was already fucked up long ago.

No, the movie definitely isn’t interesting enough to distract him from all of that.

“I’m hungry,” Felix says when the movie's credits start rolling. “Gonna run to the bathroom, and then we can order dinner?”

Both Minho and Jisung hum in agreement, and Felix is off to the bathroom.

Jisung can’t help but wince as he shifts in his seat after Felix left an empty space between him and Minho.

“You’re pretty shit at this,” Minho says and fills his mouth with soda after refilling his glass.

“At what exactly?” Jisung asks with absolutely no enthusiasm now that they are alone again.

“At pretending like you don’t hate my guts,” Minho elaborates, and then his eyes flicker down Jisung’s body, his lips revealing a satisfied smile. “And that I didn’t leave you sore.”

Jisung huffs, rolling his eyes. “And you are doing so well.”

Minho just shrugs his shoulders, takes another drink.

Jisung exhales deeply. They really do have to take this more seriously if it’s to be believable to Felix, don’t they? “Minho, could you please—”

“Hyung,” Minho interrupts him.

“What?”

“Call me hyung.”

Jisung blinks. Call me hyung.

It’s not the first time he’s heard Minho utter those words. Thinking back to the very beginning of their hook-ups when Minho, in the middle of one of their heated moments, had told him to call him hyung. It makes sense now. It wasn’t because he was trying to be friendlier or it was some sort of kink, but because of Felix. Jisung really was just a distraction. A replacement. Though he’s sure he never even got close to replacing him.

“Was that too much for your brain?” Minho asks, raising an eyebrow.

“No, I just—never mind. Anyway, hyung, could you please pass me the soda?”

“I’ll pour it for you.” Minho’s smile is unnerving as he brings up the big bottle. Too polite. Still, Jisung picks up his glass, holding it out for it to be filled. Then Minho pauses, getting all quiet with the bottle hovering in the air. Jisung is just about to ask what the hell is up, but then Minho starts pouring just as Felix rounds the corner. Of course.

“Thank you,” Jisung says when it’s full, then quickly adds, “hyung.”

Felix looks positively radiant at the simple display of kindness. “What do you want to eat?”

The rest of the evening is quite uneventful.

They order food and decide to watch another movie after eating, all the while he and Minho put on their best behavior. It’s awkward at times, but even Felix can’t expect for it to be smooth right from the start.

It’s much later when Jisung feels Felix lean heavily against him, having passed out on the couch. Minho looks at him, then presses his index finger to his lips, indicating that Jisung should stay quiet. Jisung scoffs internally. As if he wasn’t sensible enough to make that deduction himself.

Minho gets up from the couch and carefully scoops Felix into his arms. He squirms a bit but is clearly too tired to resist the help. As if the younger’s weight is nothing at all, Minho carries Felix out of the living room. Minho’s physique truly isn’t just for show, Jisung can’t help but think as he follows behind them, watching Minho’s thighs flex with every step up the stairs to Felix’s room.

Jisung stares at them from the doorway as Minho lowers Felix onto his bed and then scoots in behind him. Felix mumbles something incomprehensible in his sleep, and Minho pulls him in tight. Jisung’s lips curl into a thin line.

Minho catches it and gives him a look that says ‘Try and stop me’ but Jisung knows he can’t. Not if they are supposed to look like they get along. And if he doesn’t want to disturb Felix peacefully asleep.

He forces himself to turn around, heading for the bathroom so he can get ready for bed and maybe get his feelings under control. He can get through one night alone on the floor.

When he returns, Minho looks like he might already be peacefully asleep too.

Fucking Minho.

“Jisungie…”

Jisung opens his eyes when he hears Felix’s breathy voice calling his name, but Felix isn’t anywhere beside him and that’s what reminds him of their sleeping arrangements. He hears something shift around on the bed that is too high up for him to see much from the floor.

“Not Jisungie, Lixie,” Minho whispers.

“Hyung… We’re home.”

Jisung can’t help but get up on one elbow to have a little bit of a look, and it’s just in time to see Minho lean over, brushing his lips over Felix’s.

Felix’s breath hitches, his eyes still closed. “We shouldn’t…”

Minho pulls back slightly, caressing Felix’s cheek softly as he whispers, “Whatever you want.”

There’s a moment of silence where Felix’s parted lips seem to be contemplating what it is they want, but then his eyes pop open and he gasps loudly. “Can we go out for Korean barbecue today? I was dreaming about it!”

Jisung snorts loudly, falling back flat onto the mattress. He’s pretty sure that’s not the line of thought Minho had going. If Minho is good at finding other ways to distract himself from the temptation of his brother, Felix seems to be a pro.

Half of Felix's head suddenly appears above him, the biggest pair of eyes looking down at him from the bed. “Jisungie! Do you want to go out for barbecue today?”

Jisung can’t help but smile widely. “Sounds good.”

“Hyung?” Felix looks back up at Minho, who looks just a little bit defeated.

“Of course we can.” Minho smiles, then pecks Felix on the forehead. “I’m gonna go for a run.”

Minho is nothing if not consistent with his workout, clearly dedicated to being in the best shape for the next season of soccer, and Jisung has to admit that he might just admire his discipline a little bit. He could give Changbin and his gym routine a run for his money.

Minho gets up and steps over Jisung still on the mattress, but then he stops halfway, looking down at him between his legs. “Good morning, Jisung.”

“Good morning,” Jisung says curiously, a little thrown off at being addressed so suddenly, but then his brain catches up and he again remembers to add, “hyung.”

Minho blinks a few times, giving him that smile that’s a little too friendly for Jisung’s taste before he resumes his way across the room and out the door. Yep, it’ll take Jisung a while to get used to anything remotely kind from Minho.

Felix's head appears again. “Did you sleep down there all by yourself?”

“Mhm,” Jisung hums. “Minho carried you to bed.”

“How rude,” Felix says, but there's a smile hiding behind his pouty lips.

“Very. I could barely sleep without you beside me.” Honestly, Jisung fell asleep quite quickly despite the absence of Felix's warmth, but the previous day had been a lot for a whole number of reasons, leaving both his body and mind tired enough.

“I guess someone should make it up to you,” Felix declares with a serious expression and a nod.

A crooked smile forces its way onto Jisung’s lips. “I guess someone should.”

Without much warning, Felix rolls off the bed, only making little effort to catch himself, and Jisung huffs out a loud puff of air with the sudden weight on top of him. Felix gives him a nervous look, but then Jisung laughs and Felix does too.

“That could’ve gone very wrong,” Jisung says, chuckling, and squeezes Felix’s sides, holding him up a bit.

“Lucky I’m already in the middle of making it up to you.” Then Felix dives in, catching Jisung’s lips with his own, making Jisung breathless for a whole different reason.

He hopes Minho is going for a long run.

“So, what exactly is the plan for New Year’s?” Jisung asks, when his lips feel swollen and it’s imperative they stop for a while before it gets too heated (he hasn’t forgotten that Felix set some boundaries early on, and he isn’t about to help him break them).

“Well, since hyung is having some fancy dinner with the frat before the party, we have to figure out something just the two of us before joining.”

Just the two of us. It’s the sweetest string of words Jisung has heard for days.

“Oh!” Felix exclaims. “We should ask Changbin and Hyunjin if they want to eat together!”

Jisung breaks out into a wide smile because even if he would love to just be with Felix, he doesn’t hate the thought of seeing his best friend either. “I’ll ask them right away.”

Since it’s already quite late when they finally get up and Minho gets back from his run, they decide to skip breakfast and instead get ready to drive to a Korean barbecue place for lunch.

Minho is of course the one in charge of the small grill in the middle of the table, being the oldest and by far the most skilled cook among them. Jisung has to admit that he does an excellent job at grilling the meat. It’s nice enough, and Minho makes sure that Jisung gets his fair share of the meat too (Felix might’ve been getting a little extra).

Afterward, when their stomachs are plenty full, they decide to go for a walk in the nearby area before heading back to the house.

“Oh, look at them,” Felix says when they come across an outdoor skating rink with several people skating around.

“We should go skate,” Jisung immediately suggests after seeing Felix’s longing eyes at all the fun they’re having.

“No.” Minho’s response is prompt and firm as he turns away.

“Why not?” Jisung cocks his head, but Minho doesn’t answer or even spare him a look.

“Hyung, never really learned,” Felix explains, squeezing Minho’s upper arm gently when the older stays silent. “He fell once when we were kids and swore he’d never do it again after some other kids laughed at him. I’ve tried to make him go, but he’s stubborn.”

Minho’s ears are red. Jisung would love to tease him for that, but even more so, he’d love to see this Bambi on ice. Finally, something he’s better at. “I’m pretty good, you know,” Jisung quickly says, “I’m sure I could teach you.”

Minho looks at him, his eyes wide, looking like he’s just about to go off on Jisung for even suggesting it, but Felix cuts in before he gets the chance.

“That sounds amazing!” Felix says, beaming and taking Minho’s hand. “Please, hyung, give it a try?”

If Minho is able to say no to Felix with the way he’s looking at him, he is a much stronger person than Jisung is.

Minho stares at Felix for a moment longer but then sighs. “Fine,” he relents, “I guess we can try.”

Jisung doesn’t hesitate to get on the ice as soon as he gets his rental skates on. He does a few laps, enjoying the easy glide and the fresh breeze on his face. He’s always liked skating, even though it’s only a few times a year he gets to do it. When he finally sees Minho and Felix by the entrance (Minho still having hesitated for a while), he joins them.

Minho’s lack of experience is very obvious when he steps onto the ice. He’s clutching the board fence so hard with both hands he’s barely able to move, his skates taking the tiniest of steps forward.

“You gotta let go of the wall if you want to actually skate.” Jisung knows it’s a useless comment, but it’s hard to hold himself back now that he’s finally the one with the upper hand.

“Well, maybe I don’t want to!” Minho shoots back and stops his movement altogether, turning his back to him.

“Hyung…” Felix tries, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“Just—Go skate for a bit. I’ll be fine.”

Felix looks unsure at first but then nods to Jisung, signaling for them to leave Minho alone for a moment. “We’ll be back in a bit, okay?”

Minho just hums through strained lips, not looking at either of them.

Jisung holds out his hand for Felix to grab, who happily catches it, and they skate around, laughing. Felix isn’t a bad skater, and he certainly isn’t afraid to give it his all when he suddenly decides to sprint, seeing if Jisung can catch him (he can).

They’ve done quite a few laps when Jisung looks at Minho. He’s still in almost the same place as where they left him, but now he is holding the fence with only one hand while trying to move forward. It’s almost cute the way he wiggles his feet.

“Give me your hands,” Jisung says as he skates in front of Minho, who momentarily loses his balance at his sudden presence.

He looks at Jisung’s outstretched hands, scrunching his nose. “I’m not a child.”

“Then stop acting like one and give me your hands,” Jisung says, waving his hands. “We need to get you away from the fence.”

Minho grunts, eyeing the ice away from the safety of the fence. “I can’t afford to get injured.”

“I won’t let you fall.”

Reluctantly, Minho takes Jisung’s one hand, then slowly tries to let go of the fence with the other, but as soon as he does, his whole body shakes, and it’s in a desperate move that he grabs Jisung’s other hand as he tries to find his balance again. If Jisung’s hands had been oranges, there would’ve been juice all over them with the way they’re being squeezed in Minho’s death grip.

“Stop laughing!” Minho yells when he’s found his footing enough to look up at Jisung who can’t hold back an amused smile.

“I’m not!”

“Hyung, you got this!” Felix beams at them from a few feet away, his eyes sparkling with joy at the scene in front of him. The corners of Minho’s lips twitch upwards at the encouragement from his brother, and then he gives Jisung a firm nod.

“Okay. Teach me,” Minho says, and Jisung is tempted to remind him of the existence of the word ‘please’ for a moment but ultimately decides that the situation is fragile enough as it is. Instead, he gives Minho what he hopes is an encouraging smile.

“First of all, instead of thinking about moving your feet forward, think of it as a push with one leg so you can glide forward on the other. Kind of like—” Jisung pauses, thinking for a moment. “A skateboard.”

“A skateboard?”

“Just try, okay?”

Minho does not at all seem convinced when he gives it a try, barely pushing off with his left foot to glide forwards on the right. His hands are gripping Jisung’s hands so tightly they might just go numb at some point.

“With the way I know you can move your body, you should be way better than this,” Jisung lets out without much thought as he observes Minho’s feet’s feeble attempts.

Minho halts, looking offended. Jisung grimaces.

“Okay, that wasn’t helpful at all. I’m just saying, you just need the confidence! Trust your legs. And maybe try bending your knees a little more.”

Minho exhales through his nose, his lips tight, and Jisung thinks he’s just about ready to give up already, but then Minho bends his knees slightly more and gives it another go. It’s a much more convincing push this time, and Minho looks surprised that it actually worked. Carefully, he switches from one leg to the other while Jisung slowly skates backwards as the strides become bigger.

“Great!” Jisung exclaims as Minho seems to have found somewhat of a rhythm. “Now, try not to kill my blood circulation.”

Minho stops, wobbling a bit as he does so, then looks Jisung in the eye, realizing how tightly he’s clutching Jisung’s hands. He releases his grip slightly.

“Don’t just let go,” Minho says, sounding a little anxious.

“I’ll stay,” Jisung assures him. “My hands are here, you decide how much you want to use them.”

Minho nods, and with that he releases his grip a little further before giving it another go. He progresses fast after that. With his physique as a soccer player and the way Jisung has seen him dance, he already had a good foundation. As Jisung said, Minho just needed the confidence, and it doesn’t take long before he lets go of Jisung’s hands completely. He looks like he might even be enjoying it, (slowly) skating around on his own, but before Jisung gets to teach him how to break properly, Minho announces that it’s enough for the day. Felix doesn't object, looking satisfied with the effort from the both of them, but before Minho goes to get off of the rink, he again tells them to leave him alone for a bit, and they get to enjoy a little more skating together.

For some reason, Minho seems sour on their way home. He doesn’t look at Jisung the whole drive back, as if Jisung did him a disservice by teaching him how to skate. Maybe he did.

Anyway, he can’t be bothered to pay it any mind. Minho is just like Minho always is. Unpredictable.

It’s a little later when Minho announces that he’ll make a trip to the grocery store so he can cook them dinner. Up until then, ever since they got back, he’d been sitting in the armchair at the back of the living room by the wall full of books, immersed in some book, his face in “do not disturb”-mode, and with Soonie lounging in his lap.

Jisung and Felix busied themselves by giving the puzzle from the other day another try, bringing it downstairs with them, and spreading the pieces out onto the coffee table. The silence and lack of interaction in the living room has been nice and meant that Jisung didn’t have to pretend that he cares about Minho or vice versa, but when Minho returns and heads to the kitchen with the groceries, Jisung knows they should go help with the cooking again.

“My phone is dying,” Felix says as they get up to leave their puzzle-piece mess and join Minho in the kitchen. “I’ll just go grab my charger.” Felix walks into the hallway toward the stairs, but before he can get too far, Jisung grabs his hand.

He pulls him in for a kiss that Felix doesn’t resist despite the suddenness of it. A moment of pure bliss before whatever internal struggle Jisung is going to have to endure in the kitchen. Far too soon, they break apart again, and Felix gives him a smile before running up the stairs.

Jisung looks longingly after him but a huff behind him makes him turn around. He only catches the back of Minho’s head as he retreats into the kitchen.

“It must be frustrating,” Jisung says against his better judgment when he enters the kitchen where Minho is cutting up some vegetables. “That he won’t kiss you. Not as long as you’re here.” He’s not sure why he says it. To wipe the fact that he can kiss Felix but Minho can’t in his face? Or could it be because he might actually feel a little sorry for him? (Probably not).

Minho’s head whips up to look at him, and there’s nothing pleasant about the look he’s giving him, but then he smirks. “Don’t be mistaken, you don’t know how long I’ve waited before. You’ll find that I’m a very patient man, Han Jisung.” Then he puts the knife down on the table and steps toward him. “Besides, if I was that desperate for a kiss,” he says while moving closer—his expression reminding Jisung of a feline predator—and stops right in front of him. “I’ve found other options before, haven’t I?”

Jisung has stopped breathing altogether with Minho in his face like that, closer than what is comfortable. There’s not much distance between their bodies either, though they do not touch, but Jisung feels cornered nevertheless. His eyes flicker down to see Minho wet his lips, leaving them glistening when his tongue disappears inside his mouth again. Jisung swallows.

Then Minho snorts, shaking his head. “Get it together, Jisung. Someone might think you want me to kiss you.”

“Fuck off,” Jisung says and pushes Minho on the chest, who just chuckles in response. No, he does not want Minho to kiss him. If he could avoid it for the rest of his life, he would.

Minho turns away with a smirk and a shrug of his shoulders and picks up the knife from the kitchen counter again. He gets back to his chopping, but then he suddenly points the knife at Jisung without looking. “Do you want to learn how to properly cut an onion? I guess I owe you.”

When Felix returns from upstairs, Minho is in the middle of carefully showing Jisung how to hold the onion to avoid an accident.

“Don’t look at Felix, look at the knife!” Minho yells, grabbing Jisung’s hand that’s holding the knife.

“Sorry,” Jisung mumbles, his eyes on the onion again. Minho’s hand doesn’t leave but guides the movement of each cut, meanwhile, Felix patiently watches them with a smile on his face until the onion is all cut up.

Felix suddenly gasps, his eyes sparkling when they look at him. “I just got an amazing idea! You guys keep cooking, I’m gonna try something.”

Before they even get the chance to question what he’s up to, he disappears again. While they proceed with making dinner, there’s a commotion coming from the living room and the sound of feet up and down the stairs several times. When Felix finally comes into the kitchen again, the stew is simmering on the stove, all of the ingredients added.

“Come look!”

He waves for them to follow him into the living room, and Jisung chuckles when he sees the project. Felix has managed to move the couch all the way to the side along with the coffee table, and on the floor are three mattresses in front of the TV side by side.

“Isn’t it great?” he asks with a smile that can’t possibly get any wider, looking like it's the single best idea in the whole world. “Now no one has to sleep alone!”

Judging from Minho’s expression, Jisung isn’t sure Minho agrees. Jisung isn’t sure he does either, but for Felix, they both agree loudly before pointing out that they’ve got to go check on their dinner.

Despite the party tomorrow and the promise of plenty of alcohol, they end up drinking a few beers with their dinner. Nothing much, but it’s enough for Jisung to feel more at ease, allowing for some relaxed conversation about anime while they eat, which apparently Minho watches a lot of just like Jisung. Then they play a board game, and it doesn’t suck but ends up being actual fun (the fact that they both lose to Felix might’ve helped). Then they decide to call it a night early, having to drive back to the university tomorrow and a party to catch.

Jisung finishes washing up for bed, and Felix takes the bathroom after him. He’s just about to go downstairs when he notices that the door to Minho’s room is open, and he can’t help but go over to take a peek inside the room he still hasn’t seen.

Standing in the doorway, he sees a cat tower—a bigger one than the one in the living room—and a wheel for the cats to run in. He’s pretty sure he can spot all three cats in a quiet slumber on the tower. Other than that, there are not a lot of things in the room aside from a bed (which is currently missing its mattress), a desk, and a closet. There’s not a whole lot of personality, except for a love for cats, but Jisung guesses that makes sense since this wasn’t Minho’s room before college, and he spends most of his time away from home.

“Did you get lost?” Jisung jumps, quickly turning around to face Minho, who has silently appeared behind him.

“No, I just—the door was open,” he says, then shrugs his shoulders. “I got curious.”

“Curiosity killed the cat, as they say.” Minho takes a step forward, giving Jisung no choice but to back up, his back hitting the door frame.

Jisung scoffs. “Good thing I’m not a cat then.”

“A real pity,” Minho says with a sigh. “Might have liked you better then.” Then he steps inside his room and closes the door behind him.

Jisung shakes his head at the closed door. So much for having a good time tonight.

He hurries downstairs, not in the mood for any questions from Felix, should he step out of the bathroom and see him standing by Minho’s door. He has no answers for that, especially not if he’s supposed to “get along” with Minho.

In the living room, he looks at the three mattresses on the floor and spots the duvet he’s been using, neatly spread out on the mattress to the left. The one in the middle belongs to Felix, so at least he didn’t expect them to lie beside each other.

With a long, tired exhale, he goes to lie down.

Almost there, Jisung. Just one more night. 

Minho’s mattress is already gone when Jisung wiggles out of Felix’s arms, the bathroom calling his name. Felix, quite the heavy sleeper, doesn’t seem too bothered by his stirring, but then he turns around, hands grabbing at the empty spot on his other side, and then pouts.

“Where are you going?” he asks with his eyes still closed, his voice even deeper in the morning, raspy from sleep.

“Bathroom,” Jisung answers as he stands up.

“Are you coming back?” Felix opens his eyes just enough to send Jisung a pleading look with a pout that makes him weaker than weak.

“Always.”

Felix smiles, and Jisung hurries off.

Their cuddly morning is interrupted when Minho appears from wherever he’s been to tell them to eat enough breakfast to also last for lunch so they won’t have to stop on their drive back to campus. Then he promptly leaves again, showing a slightly strained smile. Jisung holds Felix a little bit tighter.

None of them seem to want to get up from their cozy setting in the middle of the living room, but they do have to get up if they want to make it back with plenty of time to spare to get ready to go out for dinner with Changbin and Hyunjin before the party. It is especially important to Felix: “I need extra time for makeup tonight so I can throw Edward off of the sparkly throne.”

If nothing else, Felix is the embodiment of ‘I told you we needed more glitter’ and Jisung absolutely adores him for that and would never stand in his way. So they untangle and go to the kitchen where Minho isn’t, but a big selection of banchan is on the table along with bowls of steaming rice and yesterday’s leftover stew.

They eat plenty, just like Minho told them to, and then start cleaning up the kitchen before going to the living room to tidy up, leaving it looking like they were never there at all.

It has become a habit to look at all the family photos when Jisung walks down the stairs, and now it’s for the last time, ready to leave with his duffel bag in his hand.

Honestly, he thinks that he'll miss looking at all the many pictures, especially of a tiny Felix smiling widely and—

He stops halfway down the stairs. Where are the pictures of Minho as a baby? Has he seen any at all? He gives the many pictures an extra hard look on his way down, but the youngest Minho he can find is in a family picture where Minho looks at least old enough for preschool, if not more. Nearby, he looks maybe slightly older in a photo with a backpack on, doing the salute.

Suddenly, a flash of orange jumps out from under the console table in the hallway. And of course, Minho is right there to see it all, picking up Doongie in his arms.

“Did the scary freshman frighten you, Doong-ah?” Minho asks the cat with an exaggerated baby-voice. Jisung might just gag.

“I didn’t touch him,” Jisung quickly says, but as if he didn’t say a word, Minho just turns around, nuzzling the cat while walking toward the kitchen.

“Let’s find you a treat before I leave.”

The drive is fine.

But Jisung is relieved when he can finally step out of the car, stretching his legs with a groan. He kept quiet for most of the ride, reading a manga he brought for the train ride but was too anxious to read, and occasionally listened to Felix and Minho’s chitchat.

But now they are back. Back at a place where he and Felix have their own little bubble far away from Minho’s hawk-like presence. Back at a place where he can—

“Jisung…”

“Yeah?” Jisung breathes and kisses Felix along his jaw. They had barely closed the door behind them before he had pulled Felix in, the freedom of being able to kiss Felix without worrying about Minho too tempting.

“You’ve got to let me go shower.”

Jisung pulls back with closed eyes, as if letting go of Felix is easier if he can’t see him. “Yes, go shower.”

Felix chuckles and quickly gathers his things. He gives Jisung one last deep kiss before he leaves their room. Jisung falls back onto his bed with a deep sigh. He likes Felix entirely too much.

“Can I glitter you up?” Felix asks and quickly closes the short distance to Jisung’s side of the room. Jisung swiftly turns away from the closet mirror, where he’s been trying to tame his still damp hair. Felix is right in front of him, his makeup finally finished.

Jisung’s eyes follow the intricate design of rhinestones, complimenting the freckles from his cheekbones and swirling up to his eyebrows by the outer corners of his eyes. He looks stunning. Sparkling, even in the bad lighting of their dorm room. His meticulously painted winged eyeliner, glittery silver eyeshadow, and his long pretty eyelashes finish off the look. Perfection.

“You there?” The rhinestones turn lopsided as Felix tilts his head at him.

“Sorry, I got distracted,” Jisung says with a stupidly fond smile he won’t even try to hide.

“By what?” Felix asks, batting his eyelashes.

“Something very beautiful.” It’s cheesy—really fucking cheesy—but it’s true. It makes Felix giggle, and being cheesy is so worth it when it elicits that particular sound.

Felix pecks him on the lips. “So, is that a yes to glitter?”

Of course, Jisung agrees. If Felix wants to “glitter him up” he’ll let him. Besides, last time he did his eye makeup, he had to admit it ended up looking really good on him.

Felix makes Jisung sit down on the edge of the bed, and then he gets into his lap, straddling him to keep him in place while he works his magic.

“This awakens some memories,” Jisung says as the brush swipes over his closed eyelid. His hands are planted on either side of Felix’s hips, all of his willpower focused on not letting them wander.

“It does.” Felix’s hand pauses, and suddenly Jisung feels soft lips against his own for a moment. When he opens his eyes, Felix is smiling mischievously.  “I think it went something like—”

Felix licks the tip of his nose, just like he did a few months ago when he got Jisung so surprised he fell backward. But this time Felix doesn’t leave it at that, and when Jisung’s back hits the mattress, Felix’s lips are against his after forcefully making him fall over, kissing him senseless. Jisung’s hands automatically move up under Felix’s shirt, sliding up to his waist.

“I don’t remember the kissing,” he says, looking up at Felix smiling when he pulls back.

“Right, that must have only happened in my dreams then.”

Jisung’s stomach flips. “I like this version better.”

“Me too.”

Felix pecks him on the lips, but then Jisung lets him pull him up to sit again so he can continue his work.

“Felix?” Jisung asks, hesitantly. He’s had a question on his mind for a little while, and if he doesn’t breach the subject now, it’s soon going to be too late.

“Yeah?” Felix replies, the brush not stopping its work.

“How do we do this when other people are around?”

He probably should’ve asked this question with Minho there as well so they could make sure that they were all on the same page, but it’s not how he’s supposed to act around Minho that’s been his concern. Minho isn’t the one he has the urge to be close to at all times.

The brush stops, and when Jisung opens his eyes, Felix grimaces. He thinks for a moment he might not have been clear enough with his question, but then Felix opens his mouth.

“I don’t really know?” Felix says, then twisting his mouth as he thinks it over. “But I guess it’s best that we all avoid anything too obvious. Since me and hyung, we can’t exactly…” Felix trails off and Jisung nods knowingly.

What are we? It’s at the tip of Jisung’s tongue next. But he knows he won’t get the answer he wants. At least not now.

“Come cuddle with me just for a bit?” he asks instead. If he can’t be close to Felix like that at the party, he can at least make sure that he’s properly charged beforehand. “I need my fix to get through the evening.”

Felix snorts cutely but immediately lies down with him, letting Jisung carefully pull him in after warning him to mind the makeup.

He doubts he’ll ever get tired of having Felix close like this. Feeling his warmth. Feeling as their breaths fall together, working as a single unit.

“Jisung?” Felix is the one to say his name this time.

“Mhm?”

“I’ve never topped.”

Jisung’s breath hitches, stuck in his throat. The change of topic as unexpected as it comes. He clears his throat. “Yeah?”

Felix starts drawing circles on Jisung’s chest, wrinkling his t-shirt. “Yeah, I’ve—I’ve only ever been with hyung aside from you, you know? And since hyung only tops, I know that you…”

Minho only tops. Jisung has to hold back his surprise at that because Jisung knows for a fact that that isn’t true. Unless that wasn’t Minho he fucked on Halloween. Twice. But he doesn’t correct Felix. He’ll save that enlightening piece of information for a later time. The thought of that is enough to distract him from the unpleasant feeling of knowing that Minho turns out to have been Felix’s first, but what it isn’t enough to distract him from, is that Felix is talking about potentially topping him.

“And you want to try that?” Jisung asks as calmly as he can.

“Maybe? I’ve just been thinking about it lately.” Felix’s finger stops, and he lifts his head to look Jisung in the eye. “Would it be weird?”

Jisung lets out a slightly pathetic whine at Felix. “I’ll let you top me right now if you want.”

Felix snorts loudly and smacks Jisung on the chest. “We’ve got somewhere else we have to be very soon, and you didn’t even let me finish your makeup yet!”

“It’s not too late to cancel,” Jisung tries with a pair of pleading eyes. “Changbin would understand.”

“We are not canceling!” Felix chuckles. “Also, there’s no way I’m risking you ruining my makeup before we even get to the party.” Then, after a slight pause, he adds, “So it wouldn’t be weird?”

“No, it would not be weird,” Jisung assures him, “but we have to stop talking about it if you don’t want to be late.”

With Felix in charge, they manage to get ready and show up at the entrance of the dorm building on time.

Felix quickly finished Jisung’s makeup, giving him a subtle smokey eye with only a hint of glitter (Jisung knows that Felix held himself back from doing a lot more) and helped him tame his hair as well after lying down. It matches his simple look of a pair of black skinny jeans, a belt, and a black shirt with a low neckline that’s tight in all the right places (Felix’s eyes said it all). He’s got his favorite dangly earrings in and a few chains hanging around his neck. Simple, but nice.

Felix, on the other hand, looks far from simple, wearing a very fashionable, oversized cardigan with a black and white pattern, and underneath it, he’s wearing a cropped shirt. The moment he lifts his arms even a little, the soft skin on his stomach is completely revealed, and to make it even harder to not ogle that soft piece of skin, he put in a fake belly button ring with a sparkly white stone. His pants are some very tight fake leather pants, only hanging onto his hips thanks to a belt. Aside from a pair of gem studs in his earlobes, he’s got a large ear cuff snaking its way up along his left ear, and of course his meticulously styled hair got a spray of glitter as well.

Felix looks stunning, and Jisung was more than satisfied that Felix decided they had a minute to spare after putting on their jackets and pushed him against the closed door for a quick make out session. Felix quickly applied a fresh layer of pink lip gloss (and helped Jisung fix the slight mess he left on his lips) before they left the dorm.

In the end, they arrive before Changbin and Hyunjin, waiting a few minutes before the two appear. Jisung decides to ignore the rosy cheeks and slightly out of place hair on Changbin (because Jisung would’ve understood too).

“You’ve seriously got to teach me how to do my makeup,” is the first thing out of Hyunjin after they greet each other.

The compliment on his hard work makes Felix beam brighter than ever, and of course he’ll happily teach Hyunjin everything he knows, “but you already look stunning! What brand do you use?”

They immediately head toward the sushi place not too far from campus, Changbin and Jisung leading the way, while Hyunjin and Felix are busy gushing about makeup not far behind them.

“You are the only one who knows,” Jisung whispers to Changbin. Except for Eunwoo, his brain adds begrudgingly. He could do without that.

“About what exactly?” Changbin asks, and the way he bites his teeth together after the question, doesn’t leave Jisung with a very assuring feeling.

“Why do you look like that? Please, tell me you didn’t—”

“I’m sorry! But what was I supposed to do?” Changbin defends himself, his voice more hushed than necessary when he looks back over his shoulder where Hyunjin and Felix didn’t make it across the crosswalk and are stuck in the middle, too immersed in their own conversation to properly keep up, and they stop to wait for them. “I tried not to mention it, but I was with Hyunjin all week and something may have slipped…”

Jisung sighs heavily and rubs his forehead. “What exactly slipped?”

Changbin grimaces. “That you had a threesome, maybe?”

“Oh god, Bin… He’s Minho’s teammate!”

“I know! It really just slipped. If it’s any consolation he didn’t seem that appalled by it, he only wondered about you and Felix’s relationship status, which, by the way, is—?”

“Nothing. Or at least, it’s not anything simple.” Jisung groans. He hasn’t given Changbin any recent updates. “I kind of got myself into a package deal.”

“Package deal? What, you got two for one?” Changbin chuckles.

“Yeah…” Jisung lets out a heavy sigh, then suddenly his face turns into panic. “Please, tell me you didn’t tell him about them being, you know?” So, yeah, apparently he still has a hard time saying it out loud. Brothers.

“Don’t worry. That I’m taking to my grave if I have to.”

“What’s up with you two?” Hyunjin suddenly asks, sliding his hand down Changbin’s upper arm, taking his hand in his. The light must have turned green without either of them noticing, their boyf—well, Changbin’s boyfriend and Jisung’s one half of a package deal having snuck up on them.

“Just catching up while waiting for you two,” Changbin answers naturally with a smile, and it seems to be enough to not warrant any follow-up questions. “Let’s get going. I’m starving.” Changbin pulls Hyunjin by the hand, leading their little quartet now, but Jisung turns to Felix before he can follow them.

“Changbin knows about you and me, by the way.” And about Minho. But he decides that Felix doesn’t need to know the extent of that. “Hyunjin too. Sorry,” Jisung adds and gives him an apologetic look.

“Oh, well then—” Felix takes his hand, intertwining their fingers. “I’m starving too.” Then they walk hand in hand, looking much like the pair of boyfriends walking ahead of them.

When they arrive at the restaurant, Felix stops Jisung before they join the other two inside.

“I should expect Changbin to know some things,” Felix says, clearly having given it some thought during their walk. “He’s your best friend. I’m just not used to having anyone to share my secrets with aside from hyung.” Then he smiles and squeezes Jisung’s hand. “And now you.”

“So you’re okay with it?”

Felix nods. “As long as you are okay with it, so am I.”

It might be winter and cold, but Jisung is well on his way to melt all over the pavement.

The break from Minho feels way too short, because now, after enjoying some delicious sushi, a few drinks, and a whole lot of laughs with Changbin and Hyunjin, they are headed for the frat house to join the party, which also means to Minho.

The house is booming and already full of people, the fact that it’s during their vacation doesn’t seem to have done much to keep people away from university, the promise of a great party too good of a lure.

Aside from the sheer amount of people inside, the first thing Jisung’s notices are the many party decorations all over: gold and silver balloons and garlands adorning the walls, sparkly streamers hanging from every lamp and doorway. He even spots a table full of what he assumes are party hats for free use.

But much to Jisung’s dismay, Felix couldn’t seem to care less about the decorations. He’s already stretching his neck over the crowd as if looking for someone, which Jisung has one very good guess who could be. And surely, as soon as he sees Minho near the beer pong tables (of course there are beer pong tables) he darts toward him, pulling Jisung with him.

“Hyung, do you have any lip balm I can borrow?”

Minho blinks at him, looking slightly taken aback by their sudden presence and probably lack of a greeting. “In my room, yeah,” Minho answers, his eyes dipping to Felix’s lips.

“Help me find it?”

Minho just blinks again, but then Felix’s eyes can’t possibly get any bigger, and one corner of Minho’s mouth twitches. Without further question or comment, he turns around, making his way toward the stairs, and before Jisung knows it, he’s being pulled by his hand again.

As soon as they enter Minho’s room upstairs, Felix lets go of Jisung’s hand and all but jumps into Minho’s arms, kissing him. Jisung’s eyes widen, quickly closing and locking the door behind him before anyone can accidentally catch sight of anything they shouldn’t.

Clearly, lip balm wasn’t the intended goal.

Jisung watches frozen in place as he’s forgotten by the brothers, watching Felix kiss Minho hungrily, and Minho doesn’t hold back from returning every bit of it, his hands sliding up Felix’s sides, pulling the cardigan up to reveal the younger’s skin.

Felix is clutching the front of Minho’s shirt, his lips showing no intention of slowing down, but suddenly, he pushes Minho on the chest, backing him against the wall.

Minho gasps as his back hits the wall, but quickly recovers to pull Felix back in, cupping his face as he brushes their noses against each other. “I missed you.”

“Aren’t you gonna tell me how pretty I look tonight?” Felix asks, batting his eyelashes as he retracts, giving Minho enough space to focus on the many details of his makeup.

“You look amazing,” Minho says earnestly, ghosting one thumb over a couple of the rhinestones.

Felix giggles sweetly and then pushes forward to close the distance between their lips again.

Even though it isn’t the first time Jisung has seen the two of them together, it’s still quite a view to take in. It’s one thing to have thought about them—the forbidden fantasy of them together the subject of a few very hot but confused jerk-off sessions—but is it possible to hate the sight of Felix with someone else, with Minho, his brother, whom he far from loves, but at the same time be turned on by it? He really is fucked, isn’t he…

“I want to suck you off,” Felix unexpectedly says as he stares Minho hungrily in the eyes, but then before Minho can answer, he turns his head, looking over at Jisung who still hasn’t moved. He lets go of Minho’s shirt, reaching one hand in his direction. “Both of you.”

There is no other option in Jisung’s brain but to take the invitation. That was what he and Minho agreed upon. So without hesitation, he takes Felix’s outstretched hand, letting himself be pulled in for a kiss right in front of Minho. Fuck Minho.

Just like with Minho, there’s nothing innocent about the way Felix kisses him, open-mouthed, tongue eagerly tasting all of him.

“What do you think?” Felix asks when he breaks them apart and gives the tip of Jisung’s nose a teasing lick. “Can I?”

“Yes,” Jisung lets out, feeling breathless already.

Felix slides a hand down Jisung’s upper body and down to his pants, where it stops when he feels a bulge that definitely didn’t come just from kissing. He clearly approves, giving him a satisfied look, then turns to Minho again. “Hyung?”

Minho’s expression is unreadable to Jisung. Confusion maybe? But before he can figure it out, Minho pulls Felix in by the neck, kissing him again, and Jisung feels himself twitch below.

There must be a silent agreement between them because next Felix drops to his knees.

He starts with Minho’s belt and makes quick work of opening his pants. It’s without hesitation that he pulls Minho’s cock out, as if he’s in a hurry to get it in his hands. Minho is breathing heavily, his jaw hanging slack as he looks down at Felix, who easily strokes his half-hard dick to full size before licking up his shaft and popping the head into his mouth.

Felix is humming around the cock in his mouth as he sucks it like it’s the best lollipop he’s ever had, looking up at Minho with big sparkly eyes. With a moan, Minho buries one hand in Felix’s hair, but it’s loose, not trying to get in control.

Jisung blinks, still not entirely sure what to feel, what to allow himself to feel, as he looks down at Felix, but then Felix’s eyes catch his gaze, and Jisung is mesmerized as he watches him take in more of Minho. He feels his pants tighten uncomfortably and unconsciously moves to open his belt to relieve some of the pressure.

Felix finally pops off of Minho, licking the head as strings of saliva still connect them, and turns to Jisung, grabbing his belt to pull him closer to them. He swiftly opens Jisung’s pants, pulling out Jisung’s cock, which even with the little attention it’s gotten so far, springs free fully hard (and bigger than Minho’s).

Felix smirks and with no time to waste, he grabs him, licking over the tip of the head, sending shivers down Jisung’s spine. As Felix starts swallowing him inch by inch, Jisung realizes that he hasn’t had Felix like this; on his knees, mouth around him, big innocent eyes looking up at him, and god is it a sight he never wants to forget.

While Felix continues to bop his head around Jisung, his left hand with a tight grip around his shaft, his right hand moves to grab Minho’s cock, stroking him in sync.

It’s an even lewder sight when Felix starts moving between them, licking and sucking, switching as if he can’t decide which lollipop tastes better, his hands never leaving either of them alone.

Jisung can feel Minho beside him, their arms touching as they stand close for Felix’s convenience, but they never acknowledge each other, their eyes on Felix only.

“Lixie…” Minho breathes when Felix stays with him, repeatedly taking him as far as he can.

“Don’t ruin my makeup,” Felix warns as he pulls back. “I’ll make you lick up every drop you spill.” He then sticks out his tongue, letting Minho’s tip touch it as he strokes him faster, all his attention on getting Minho off now.

“Fuck…” Minho bites his bottom lip as he struggles to keep quiet until he can’t hold back longer, his cum spilling into Felix’s mouth. Felix pumps him completely dry, his tongue staying out as it catches every last bit of cum it can, then without swallowing, Felix turns his head and takes Jisung in his mouth, swirling Minho’s cum around him. His lips are glistening, wet and messy, not able to control the mix of saliva and cum.

Jisung can’t deny that it’s ridiculously hot. Felix, with his so innocent and caring demeanor to the rest of the world, taking his cock and using another man’s cum as lube.

Then Felix starts taking him whole, leaving nothing more to be desired, and Jisung is done for.

He comes down Felix’s throat with no risk of ruining any makeup, and Felix looks breathtaking as he swallows. He feels absolutely dizzy when Felix slips him out of his mouth, licking him clean.

In big contrast to what just happened, Felix plants a soft peck on each of their cocks, then looks up at them with a proud look on his face. “Stay,” he demands, softly but firmly.

Staying kneeling on the floor, Felix opens his pants and pulls out his cock, then begins stroking himself, all the while looking up at them.

Jisung stares down at the wet, parted lips, listening to the heavy breathing escaping from between them.

“I can—” Jisung begins, wanting to offer Felix to blow him off instead, but Felix interrupts him.

“Can you kiss?” Felix’s eyes dart desperately between them with the question.

Jisung’s eyes only meet Minho’s for a split second before they crash together. What Felix wants, Felix gets.

Neither of them hold back, nothing gentle or caring about the way they kiss, their hands quickly buried roughly in each other’s hair. They know each other’s mouths by now, letting it get far messier than it needs to be, only spurred further on when Felix lets out a whine from below them.

Felix is getting off to them kissing, and it might just make Jisung a little bit insane. He spares Felix a glance between kisses and catches Minho’s lip between his teeth just for show as they keep kissing.

The sound of Felix jerking off gets louder and faster, until he moans, unhinged, undoubtedly meeting his climax. Minho pulls back from Jisung without warning, directing his attention downward where Felix is panting, hunched over.

Minho quickly packs his (half-hard Jisung notices) cock inside his pants and strides to his bedside table, picking up some tissues, before crouching down on the floor. But instead of handing Felix the tissues, he lifts Felix’s head with a soft hand against his cheek and kisses him even softer.

Jisung steps back, tugging his (also at least half-hard) cock carefully inside his pants to occupy himself, once again feeling like he’s intruding on something far too intimate between the two brothers.

When they finally get up, Felix grabs his hand and kisses him. It feels as soft as the one he just witnessed and immediately melts any insecurities away.

“Now we can party,” Felix declares with a firm nod, then thoughtfully adds, “but I think I might actually need that lip balm now.”

“Jisung!”

Jisung whips his head around. He only just got downstairs. Alone. It might’ve looked too suspicious if the three of them had rejoined the party looking disheveled together, so it’s a necessary part of their unusual arrangement to be careful. And Jisung is, of course, completely and utterly okay with leaving Felix and Minho upstairs on their own.

“Where did you disappear to?” Changbin asks when Jisung joins him by the doorway to the kitchen. “I turned around and you were gone.”

“Nowhere. Got anything to drink?” Jisung quickly says, ignoring Changbin’s question and looking past him inside the kitchen. His mouth feels dry, parched after some heavy exchanging of saliva with both Minho and Felix. But Changbin doesn’t need to know that.

“You did something!” Changbin accuses him, with an index finger pointed at him, as he steps into the kitchen where a group of people are doing shots around the kitchen island. He spots a tub full of ice and bottles of beer and grabs one, immediately taking several gulps that help ground him after what happened upstairs.

“Did what?” Jisung asks, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

“Something dirty.” Changbin wiggles his eyebrows, and Jisung can only roll his eyes. “Oh yeah, you definitely did. What happened?”

Jisung chuckles. “You don’t need to know everything I do!” he says, shaking his head at his always too curious best friend.

“I happen to disagree.”

“You can’t even decide if you want to know,” Jisung then points out. Changbin’s continuous inner conflict between wanting the gossip but also not fully able to deal with the thought of two brothers together is still very much there.

“Alright then. Keep your secrets,” Changbin relents with a nod of his chin, “for now.”

Jisung snorts, then takes another drink. But the end of their conversation leaves too much room for other things in his brain. Felix hasn’t come downstairs yet.

He almost empties the beer this time, then shakes his head. He needs to let go of those insecurities—whatever they are. It doesn’t matter if they are still upstairs together or not. Felix isn’t about to cast him aside just because they are now back, and his rule about not being intimate with Minho doesn’t apply anymore.

“Where’s Hyunjin?” Jisung asks, ready to turn his attention to something else.

“He’s talking to some of the guys on the soccer team,” Changbin tells him. “I said I’d go look for you when I found out that I didn’t understand what the heck they were talking about—strategies and whatnot—and that I wasn’t going to understand any time soon.” He chuckles.

“When it comes to that,” Jisung replies, pointing the tip of the bottle at Changbin, “I definitely don’t envy you for dating someone on the soccer team.”

“Don’t jinx it. I’d say you are about this close,” Changbin says, holding up his thumb and index finger, showing a minimal space in between them, “to make that happen.”

Jisung’s eyes widen when he realizes what Changbin is implying. “I am so not! There’s no fucking way Minho—”

Suddenly, a pair of arms circle his waist from behind, interrupting him, which is lucky, because the pair of arms belongs to Felix, and whatever he says about Minho in front of Felix might not be all that favorable. Especially not when talking to Changbin, since Felix now knows that he confides in him.

“No way hyung is what?” Felix asks as he props his chin onto Jisung’s shoulder.

“Is a better soccer player than Son Heung-min,” Jisung blurts out. It’s a ridiculous thing to say and a very obvious fact, but it’s way better than anything else he could’ve come up with on the spot.

Felix snorts. “I mean, hyung is great, but even I wouldn’t suggest that.” He then lets go of Jisung, beaming. “Who wants to do shots?”

They end up in a fierce game of flip cup around the kitchen table when Hyunjin appears with Chan and Seonghwa. (“Ah, it’s the roommates!” Seonghwa had said, smiling widely at Felix and Jisung when he saw them.) Jisung is pretty sure Seonghwa eyes them curiously more than a few times, but whatever he observes, he doesn’t comment on it.

It’s nice seeing Chan again too, talking music with him and Changbin for a bit when Chan suggests a water break (the ever responsible hyung), and they already make several plans for producing sessions in the new year before the next term starts.

It’s about a quarter to midnight when someone from the frat yells for everyone to gather in the living room. There’s a projector pointed to the wall with a video ready to play.

Felix, who has been a part of the New Year’s parties for the past two years, offers him a quick explanation of what’s about to happen. Jackson—a legendary head of the frat, apparently—had a European exchange student under his wing, who introduced him to a tradition from back home. After that, Jackson had decided it had to become a tradition in the frat, too.

It’s a skit of a woman at her 90th birthday dinner, celebrating it as if her deceased friends are still alive and well, sitting around the table with her. Then, in the absence of her friends, her butler circles the table and acts in the role of each of them, drinking in her honor.

“The butler drinks for all of her friends?” Jisung asks, still trying to understand before it starts.

“Yes. And every time he trips on the tiger skin carpet on his way to grab more food and wine, we drink!” Felix explains excitedly.

“What does this all have to do with New Year's Eve?”

“Nothing at all! Though the butler does get drunk enough and mistakenly says ‘Happy New Year’ once.”

Jisung shakes his head. “This makes absolutely no sense.”

“That’s the beauty of it!” Eunwoo suddenly interjects from behind them, wiping a fake tear from under his eye, but then he is already on his way again, “See you on the other side!” He waves, squeezing through the crowd to get closer to the action.

It finally starts, and it’s clear that the majority of the people there know the drill and a lot of the dialogue by heart, but it doesn’t make them sound any less excited every time the butler walks toward the tiger’s head to see if he makes it or not. It’s no less weird than what Jisung expected, but everyone in the room is focused on the silly scene before their eyes, and he is quickly as invested as everyone else, cheering and drinking whenever the butler fails (which he seems to do every single time).

When it finishes (and the butler is drunker than everyone in the frat), it’s only a few minutes to midnight, and a giant clock is projected onto the wall instead.

Jisung still has Felix beside him, and on his other side are Changbin and Hyunjin. Drinks ready for a big collective cheers, the whole room counts down the seconds together, erupting in a loud “Happy New Year!” when it finally strikes twelve.

With a big smile on his face, Jisung takes a drink in celebration with the rest of them, but the smile disappears fast as he notices how many couples there are around them (or maybe they are just couples for the night) because several people kiss.

Changbin and Hyunjin have clearly forgotten about the world around them, and Jisung can’t help but let out a longing sigh at that. If he could, that would’ve been first on his agenda for the new year as well.

Then suddenly, he feels a soft touch against his cheek. “Happy New Year, Jisungie.”

The warmth from the lips on his cheek spreads when he looks at a smiling Felix beside him. “Happy New Year, Felix.” He gets lost in his sparkling eyes for a moment and is admiring his glittery freckles for the night again when he spots Minho right behind him. He must have appeared while he was distracted by all the couples. On his best behavior, Jisung looks at him and says, “Happy New Year, hyung.”

Minho nods, raising his drink. “Happy New Year, Jisung.”

They both take a drink. It’s still weird. Acting like everything is fine between them. But hey, they’re trying.

“Happy New Year, Minho-ya!” Eunwoo appears without warning again, jumping in front of them, and before Minho can react, he’s cupping his face. With a loud smacking sound, he places a big kiss on the corner of Minho’s mouth. Jisung almost chokes on his beer, snorting.

“Happy new year, fuckhead,” Minho says bluntly when he is released and wipes his mouth.

“Hey, respect your elders!” Eunwoo warns him, nudging his chin at him. “Do you kiss your brother with that mouth?”

Jisung’s eyes widen, but Minho’s response is quick, not caring about any implications, “No, just your dad.”

Eunwoo nods thoughtfully. “Can’t blame you. My dad is a catch! Just look at these genes!” he says and steps back, gesturing down his body.

Minho shakes his head, laughing. “You’re such an idiot.”

“Hey, what did I just say about respecting your elders?”

Minho bows his head. “Forgive me, hyung, for I have sinned.”

“Shit, that’s scary. Bring the impolite shitbag back.” Eunwoo grimaces and Minho straightens up, hitting Eunwoo harshly on the shoulder with a big grin.

It’s an amusing display of banter to Jisung, and slightly weird to see Minho behaving like that after only really experiencing how he is around himself and Felix. He’d almost forgotten that the two of them are close, being teammates and frat brothers, hell, they even share a wall upstairs.

“Jisung, my favorite freshman!” Eunwoo suddenly says, turning to him and offering him a fist bump. “Happy New Year!”

“Happy New Year, Eunwoo.” Jisung chuckles, accepting the bump, relieved that Eunwoo didn’t offer him a kiss as well.

“Oi! What am I then?” Felix asks, giving him an offended look.

“Felix! My favorite—” Eunwoo squints his eyes, then glances at Minho and grimaces. “Off-limits! And favorite beer pong mate?” he adds and lifts his eyebrows in question, making the invitation clear.

Felix beams. “You bet!”

It’s much later, after witnessing several beer pong matches with Felix on the winning team when Jisung finds himself on the dance floor.

He’s with Felix, jumping around and being silly, just having fun. He hasn’t seen Changbin and Hyunjin for a while, and he can only assume that the couple found something more fun to do (fucking).

He has to admit that it’s been a great party, and it’s been easy enough not to accidentally be too affectionate with Felix or kiss him (though there have been plenty of occasions where he thought about it). They are laughing, Felix almost falling over when Jisung twirls him around by the hand, but then the next song starts playing. It’s particularly suggestive, and when Felix finds his footing, he gets a lot closer than Jisung has been used to all night.

He puts his arms loosely over Jisung’s shoulders while moving in seductive fluid motions, hips swaying as he inches closer. Jisung’s hands instinctively find their place on his hips, feeling every alluring move underneath them as he tries to move along.

He’s not as good a dancer as Felix, but he’s got rhythm enough to not look like a complete dork, and thanks to being pleasantly drunk, a light buzz in his brain, he feels more loose on the dance floor than he normally would.

Felix gets closer, to the point that he’s all but grinding against him. Jisung does his best to keep just a hint of distance, not to lose himself, because they are still very much in public, surrounded by people. Then Felix leans in to dance cheek to cheek, and—

Jisung’s whole body shivers. That was definitely Felix’s tongue making contact with his ear for a second. Either Felix is too drunk to care about the many people around them, or he’s decided that the people around them are too drunk to notice.

Felix’s breath sounds heavy by his ear, and his hands start to wander, one of them burying in his hair while they keep on dancing. Jisung grabs Felix a little tighter, sliding a little lower, all the while Felix keeps moving in a way that is too enticing for Jisung’s brain—tipsy or not—to keep cool.

Jisung suddenly spots Eunwoo watching in one corner, grinning. With an excited look at them, he picks something up from one hand and puts it in his mouth. It takes a moment for Jisung to understand, but Eunwoo is eating fucking imaginary popcorn. He keeps “eating” while glancing to the side, and Jisung’s stomach flips as he follows the direction of his eyes, finding out that Eunwoo isn’t their only spectator.

Some feet away, by the beer pong table, Minho is far less focused on the beer pong match and much more on them. His expression is quite unreadable as he watches with a blank face. As many times before, Minho is unnerving. Jisung would honestly rather he’d scowl at them than whatever uncertain emotions he is hiding.

“Something wrong?” Felix asks, and Jisung realizes that he must have stopped dancing ever since spotting Minho. Felix looks around, then stops as well. “Oh.”

Felix immediately loosens his hold on Jisung, but to Jisung’s surprise, it’s not to stop dancing. He twirls around and places his hands on top of Jisung’s, swaying his hips again and forcing Jisung to move with him as he brushes his ass against him. Felix is looking directly at Minho, letting himself be seen by him. Minho’s expression doesn’t change, but he seems more tense, from his jaw to his body, to the way he clutches the bottle of beer in his hand.

Felix gets more daring and starts to guide Jisung’s hands around his body, sliding one of them up under the hem of his crop top. Then he leans his head back against Jisung’s shoulder, exposing his neck to him as he closes his eyes, feeling the music with his whole body pressed against him. It takes all of Jisung not to turn his head and kiss him right then and there.

He forgets all about Minho for a while, Felix demanding all of his attention as he grinds himself back against him and blood flows downstairs. He’s got his eyes closed as well, nothing but Felix on his mind, but then he remembers and glances in Minho’s direction. Minho isn’t looking at them anymore, busy talking to someone.

As if Felix knew he was distracted for a moment, he makes an especially bold motion with his hips that makes Jisung lose his breath, letting out an involuntary moan.

Felix turns his head, brushing his nose against Jisung’s cheek with a satisfied smile as he whispers, “Meet me upstairs in a bit?”

Not waiting for an answer, Felix snakes his way out of Jisung’s arms and disappears right into the dancing crowd, headed toward the stairs on the other side of the mass.

Jisung takes a deep breath and then one more. He’s standing on the dance floor, half hard and dizzy. Felix knows just how to drive him crazy.

There’s obviously only one sensible course of action, and that is to follow Felix upstairs. He has no reason not to, but every reason to do so. He realizes that he must look a little stupid just standing there alone, not moving amidst all the dancing people, but Felix told him to meet him in a bit. He can only assume that what Felix meant by that was to make it less obvious that they disappeared together. How much is a bit?

Another moment passes, and Jisung looks around. Minho isn’t sparing him so much as a glance, and neither is anyone else. Surely, it’s safe to slowly make his way upstairs.

He dances his way through the crowd and hurries around the corner to prevent Chan from spotting him from the kitchen and potentially holding him up. When the coast seems clear, he doesn’t hesitate to sprint up the stairs and down the hallway.

He opens the door to Minho’s room, finding it dimly lit, a lamp on the bedside table the only light source. Half in shadow on the bed, Felix immediately gets up when he sees him and spares no time to get close again.

They immediately meet in a kiss that fits what they started downstairs. Grabbing Felix’s ass, Felix gets the hint to jump, wrapping his legs around Jisung. With one foot, he makes sure the door is closed behind them before making his way toward the bed, all the while kissing Felix in his arms.

He puts Felix down on the bed, making him fall back as he cages him in between his legs. The kissing doesn’t stop, wild and careless now that no one is around to question what they are doing. Jisung feels like he’s burning up in no time, Felix lighting a fire in him with his every touch. He tugs at his shirt, and Jisung lets him pull it off of him, revealing his upper body.

He looks up at him like he’s been starving, licking his lips. Without warning, he shoves Jisung hard enough to push him off of him, and suddenly Jisung is the one with his back against the mattress as Felix swings a leg over him, kissing him and his hands feeling up his naked upper body.

Jisung feels a hand palm his rapidly growing bulge through his jeans, making him gasp. “Are you sure about this?” he breathes when his brain catches up with their current setting.

“Why wouldn’t I be sure?” Felix asks while making no move to stop his open-mouthed kisses that have moved to Jisung’s jaw.

“It’s Minho’s room,” Jisung points out, his voice unsteady under Felix’s touch. “You don’t think he’ll be annoyed?”

“What’s hyung’s is mine,” Felix says without hesitation and licks a long stripe up Jisung’s jawline. “And what’s mine is hyung’s.”

There’s a shiver through Jisung’s body again. He grabs Felix’s ass, squeezing it tight as the words circle around his brain, feeling like a little more than just an innocent fact.

“Besides, I want you now,” Felix whispers into his ear, “and I’m plugged.”

Jisung swears his brain crashes when Felix throws in that information like it’s nothing. Felix has been wearing a plug all this time? At the restaurant, even?

“Do you want me, too?” Felix asks when Jisung doesn’t respond right away and pulls back.

“So, so bad,” he answers truthfully, shaking his head in disbelief at the other’s actions. Of fucking course, he wants Felix. He can’t imagine ever not wanting him.

Felix sits up, smiling sweetly, and lets his cardigan fall down his shoulders, throwing it to the floor. The fake belly ring sparkles in the light as he moves around, quickly stripping himself of his cropped shirt as well, showing off his beautiful, soft skin. Jisung slides his hands up Felix’s clothed thighs as he tries to comprehend the absolutely gorgeous man straddling him, but it doesn’t last long, the eagerness to be closer making him pull him down again, crashing their lips together.

His fingers slide to his ass, this time moving to the middle where they find something solid. He presses gently but firmly, and Felix moans into his mouth when the plug pushes deeper.

A sudden burst of light makes Jisung freeze, and Felix sits up with a jolt. He looks like a deer caught in headlights for a second, but then his expression changes into something entirely different, smirking when he recognizes Minho.

Minho doesn’t say anything, but quietly closes the door behind him, blocking out the harsh light from the hallway. His lips are pressed hard together as he takes in the scene, but then Felix gets off of the bed and approaches him. He cups Minho’s face with one hand, brushing a thumb over his cheek, and Minho’s expression immediately softens.

“Was hoping you’d come, hyung,” Felix says gently and slides the thumb to Minho’s lips, where it stays. Minho kisses his finger and Felix smiles, dropping his hand. “Want you to watch.”

Jisung’s stomach flips. Felix wants what?

Minho blinks, then squints his eyes, as if he’s trying to figure out what exactly Felix is planning. Then Felix leans closer, stopping right before their lips can touch.

“Can you do that, hyung?” Felix asks while brushing his lips over Minho’s. “Watch and wait for your turn?” Then he kisses him, just once, and pulls back. Minho chases after more, but Felix stops him with a hand against his chest. “Be patient for me, hyung,” Felix says softly, staring into Minho’s eyes.

Minho visibly exhales with his whole chest and lifts a hand to Felix’s cheek. “Whatever you want, Lixie.”

Felix turns his face into Minho’s hand, kissing the palm of it. He then nods to the desk chair at the opposite end of the room. “Take a seat, hyung.” He turns away from Minho, quickly crawling back on top of Jisung, kissing him.

Jisung’s tipsy brain immediately lets him let go of any hesitations he might have. Besides, not to sound like a broken record and remind himself for the twentieth time, he and Minho already said what had to be said about situations like these and agreed on how to proceed. And right now, he gets to have Felix like he’s been craving for weeks.

He slides a hand down Felix’s back, intending to slide down into his pants, but they are too tight to allow much more than his fingertips. Impatient, Felix gets up on his knees and opens his pants, wiggling to push them down. Just as eager, Jisung sits up and grabs Felix by the hips, helping pull the pants down. Jisung groans as he eyes the outline of Felix’s cock, so clear through his underwear.

He pulls his cock free and makes Felix moan when he can’t help but take his length into his mouth. Positioning himself lower between his legs, Jisung takes all of him, and Felix falls forward onto his hands, too weak to keep himself up with the pleasure.

There’s not much patience in the way Jisung swallows all of him repeatedly, no taking things slow, but Felix doesn’t seem to mind at all, arching his back while moaning. Then Jisung reaches a hand behind him, finding the plug again. As if it’s a button to make Felix moan louder, Felix whines beautifully when Jisung presses it, challenging how deep it can go while almost making himself gag on his cock.

But a blowjob isn’t the plan right now, and Jisung drops his head back onto the bed, letting Felix’s dripping cock slide out of his mouth.

Felix is breathing heavily above him, but only for a moment before he moves down the bed to get level with Jisung, kissing him again.

“Need you naked and inside me,” Felix breathes and bites Jisung’s lip, letting it slip from between his teeth.

Jisung feels dizzy, his whole body aching for Felix at this point, and he flips them around, hurriedly jumping off the bed so he can strip himself of the rest of his clothes.

“What do you think, hyung?” Jisung hears Felix ask, and when he looks at him while dropping his underwear to the floor, Felix is wiggling his ass at Minho on all fours, arching his back. “Do you like this one? It’s new.”

Jisung had honestly forgotten about Minho for a moment, the bedside lamp not offering much light. Minho is sitting in part shadow on the desk chair that he’s pulled over to face the side of the bed.

Minho stares hungrily at Felix’s ass and jerks in his seat, looking like he is ready to get up and forget all about waiting, but then the next moment he leans back as if nothing happened.

Felix looks more than pleased with his reaction.

Teasingly, he slides a hand down between his asscheeks and grabs the plug, toying with it, not quite pulling it out, and then pushing it in again with a lewd moan.

Jisung doesn’t even register that he starts stroking himself, too turned on and mesmerized by Felix’s display on the bed. His sweet Felix, who keeps surprising him. He needs him so bad…

Felix doesn’t stop him when Jisung gets behind him on the bed and moves to take over. He spreads his asscheeks apart, giving them a good squeeze while he eyes the white gem covering what he right now wants the most. There’s a loud gasp from Felix when Jisung finally pulls out the plug.

And there it is. Felix’s gaping asshole. Beautiful, puckered, and pink.

Jisung drops the plug to the floor and carefully pushes a finger inside the pulsing warmth. It glides in easily, Felix’s hole stretched and lubed already. Felix all but purrs at the intrusion and pushes back against Jisung’s single digit. Despite having asked Minho to be patient, he doesn’t seem to have much patience himself.

“Jisung…” he whines. “Just need your cock.”

Jisung’s cock twitches. Fully intending to give Felix exactly what he wants as quickly as possible, he pulls out his finger. He inspects the lube that sticks to it. It won’t be enough.

Unwillingly, but feeling slightly smug, too, he looks at Minho. “Got some lube?”

Minho seems surprised at being addressed, but after a glance at Felix, he reaches for the second drawer in the bedside table and throws a bottle of lube to Jisung.

Jisung manages to catch it and gives Minho a self-satisfied smile, sounding too sweet when he says, “Thank you, hyung.”

Minho exhales through his nose and sits back, crossing his arms and legs. “You’re welcome.”

Jisung turns away, ready to forget about Minho again, and lubes up his cock thoroughly so he can feel that irresistible warmth with more than just a finger.

With a firm hold on Felix’s one asscheek, he lines up his cock to his hole. But before he can enter, he suddenly becomes very aware of being watched. Out of the corner of his eye, Minho switches his legs, crossing the left over the right instead. Jisung doesn’t look at him, determined not to. He swallows and forces his focus back on Felix, then pushes inside.

As he does so, the feeling of Felix around him again after so long is enough to make him forget about anyone else in the room. He’s got Felix right there, just for him.

He starts carefully, letting Felix get used to him, fucking him slowly so they both feel every inch of connection between them.

“Jisung,” Felix suddenly says, looking over his shoulder at him, and Jisung stills. “We don’t have to care about the neighbors tonight.”

Jisung smiles. Felix is right. They are not at the dorm, and the music from the party is so loud that he can’t imagine anyone hearing them. It’s a clear invitation from Felix to not hold back. So he won’t.

He quickly sets a faster pace, and the force of his thrusts makes Felix fall onto his elbows, not able to hold himself up.

There’s a sudden low groan from beside them. Without stopping what he’s in the middle of, Jisung automatically whips his head to where it came from.

Right, Minho is still here.

Minho looks up at him, staring at him intensely. When Jisung thrusts again, Minho’s eyes flicker to where he and Felix are connected, then find his eyes again.

Jisung wants to look away, but something in him stops him. He can’t deny that having Minho’s eyes on him like this makes his pulse beat a little bit faster. Keeping that intense eye contact, he thrusts harder, and Felix whines loudly. It makes Minho let out another groan, louder this time, and he shifts in his seat.

It’s hot. Being watched by Minho. Maybe it shouldn’t be, but it definitely is. It’s quite ironic, really. All those days in their family home, hating having Minho around, feeling like he was under constant surveillance, but now, right here while fucking Felix, it’s suddenly hot.

Jisung doesn’t stop, and Minho shifts again, spreading his legs this time, cock clearly very hard in his pants.

It’s impressive, really, how calm Minho still seems to be despite it all. If it was the other way around, Jisung would be going absolutely insane at the sight of them if asked to “wait for his turn”. Felix can be quite the devil in disguise, it turns out. But since it’s not Jisung in Minho’s situation, it’s hard not to feel a little smug about it all. But maybe Minho isn’t all that calm…

Jisung bites his lip, then looks down at Felix and pulls out of him. He pulls Felix up, back against his chest, making him crane his neck so they can kiss. Felix gasps into his mouth.

“Any wishes?” Jisung whispers. He’s got his own ideas, but if Felix wants something else, he’ll give him that.

“I’m all yours.”

Jisung smiles, then grabs him by the hips and flips him onto his back. In doing so, he also makes sure to turn their position on the double bed ninety degrees. Felix lets out a gasp and a surprised laugh at suddenly being manhandled like that, and Jisung feels so lost in him as he looks down at him. He leans down to kiss him deeply again, but instead of keeping his eyes closed, he opens them to look up at Minho as he licks into Felix’s mouth. Minho is in his direct line of sight now and not many feet away.

Minho looks a little puzzled, knitting his brows, but Jisung just smirks at him as he pulls away from Felix. Then he straightens up and hoists Felix’s legs onto his shoulders, ready to be back inside him.

When he bottoms out again, Felix closes his eyes with a whimper, looking absolutely breathtaking, and Jisung draws one moan out after the other from him, as he starts fucking him relentlessly. Felix’s whole body is shaking with every move, and he’s clutching the sheets, doing his best to stay in place, but his head still slides over the edge of the bed.

Jisung looks at Minho, and he doesn’t miss the way Minho’s face tenses, his nostrils flaring as he’s able to see Felix’s scrunched-up face of pleasure upside down.

“Fuck.”

It’s barely audible, but Felix must have heard Minho, because he opens his eyes, shakily murmuring, “Hyung.”

The brothers make eye contact, and Jisung slows down to give Felix the chance to say whatever he has on his mind. But Felix stays quiet, and Jisung thrusts another moan out of him. Minho clenches one fist and moves his other hand to the bulge in his pants, pushing down on it, his face so tense it almost looks like he’s in pain when he squeezes his eyes shut.

“If you can’t wait, hyung,” Felix manages to stutter before another push interrupts him and he’s squirming again, “maybe Jisung will let you fuck him.”

Jisung freezes.

Then Felix lifts his head and looks up at him, his eyes dark with hunger. “What do you say, Jisungie? Want to be fucked while fucking?”

Jisung swallows. It’s not exactly a proposition he’s gotten before. Does he want that?

He lifts his head to look at Minho, who’s already looking at him, but Jisung has once again no idea what’s going on in Minho’s mind.

When neither of them can figure out how to say anything, Jisung decides to resume what he was in the middle of. He grabs Felix’s hips, holding him still as he fucks into him, hard enough for Felix to do nothing but moan.

But then Jisung can’t help but look at Minho again, and his eyes can’t seem to leave when they’re caught by Minho. Minho’s gaze doesn’t waver either.

It feels almost like a game. He continues to fuck Felix, eyes locked with Minho’s, as if they are daring the other to look away first. Or maybe he’s daring Minho to actually do it. Fuck him. Maybe he wants it. Maybe they both do. Maybe he wants to be deep inside of Felix while Minho is buried inside of him. Maybe he wants to know what it’d feel like…

Suddenly, Minho gets up and Jisung freezes again. Minho closes the short distance between them and Jisung is sure he’s going to make a move, but he stops right by them.

Not sparing Felix a glance, Minho is still looking straight at Jisung when he bluntly says, “You want it.”

Just as bluntly, Jisung quickly replies, “So do you.” Deny it, I fucking dare you, is all Jisung can think, the look on his face expressing exactly that.

But Minho doesn’t deny it. “I’ll need to prep you first, yeah?”

Jisung nods. “Yeah.”

Minho walks around the bed, getting to the opposite side so he’s behind them. Then he reaches for Jisung’s hips and pulls him back toward him.

“Need you to back up a bit.”

Jisung doesn’t resist the pull and slips out of Felix, falling forward onto his hands as Minho pulls him all the way to the edge of the bed where he’s standing. Jisung is on all fours, and Minho must be satisfied with his position because his hands let go of him. Felix gets comfortable in front of him, looking at them expectantly with his bottom lip between his teeth—it might as well be Christmas.

Jisung’s pulse is racing, his heart beating fast. He’s already sweaty from fucking Felix, but now he feels like he’s burning up.

It’s a welcome sensation when he feels cold lube on his rim, Minho’s spreading it around and soon pushing a finger inside him. Jisung moans. He definitely wants this. He’s more aroused than he thought possible, the thought of being fucked while fucking playing with his sanity already. Instinctively, he pushes backward, craving more than just a finger.

But it’s not easy for him to stay relaxed, too excited for what’s about to happen, and when Minho tries to add another finger it’s tight. He closes his eyes, grimacing. Then there’s movement in front of him, and something soft touches his lips.

Felix’s warm lips steal his focus, and his body instantly relaxes while his lips ask for more. He’s soon moaning repeatedly into Felix’s mouth, and at some point a third finger joins the other two, fucking him faster. He’s losing his breath, and Felix’s lips disappear again so he can breathe.

When he opens his eyes, Felix is looking up at him fondly, lying under him.

It hits him then that Felix hasn’t seen him like this. On the receiving end and at the complete mercy of someone else, and it makes his cheeks heat up. He gasps loudly when Minho targets his prostate and loses his balance. He gets down onto his elbows, pressing his forehead against Felix’s.

His prostate takes another critical hit, and he bites back a moan, feeling a little pathetic in front of Felix like this.

“You’re so beautiful,” Felix whispers to him and cups his face. “So hot.” Then he slides a hand down between Jisung’s legs and wraps around his cock, and it’s entirely too much.

“Don’t,” Jisung stutters quietly, blushing hard after the compliment. “I’ll come too soon.”

To his relief, Felix immediately loosens his grip, and he feels like he can breathe again. Felix tilts his chin up to kiss him again, swallowing his moans as Minho keeps at his prostate.

“Let me inside you again,” Jisung breathes when he finally feels ready for more. Minho hears it too, and pulls out his fingers. Jisung looks back at him, saying, “Let me get on the floor.”

Minho backs up, and Jisung stands up, stretching his legs. He then pulls Felix lying on his back to the edge of the bed, pushing his knees up and letting his legs fall wide apart. He quickly grabs more lube, and easily pushes past his rim again, bottoming out.

He has to take a moment just to breathe, feeling sensitive in so many places at the same time. Behind him, he hears moving around as Minho takes the opportunity to strip himself of his clothes.

He gives Felix a few thrusts, enjoying the sight of Felix being the center of attention again, groaning. Soon, he feels Minho’s warm naked body behind him, hands grabbing his waist.

Jisung stills when he feels lips against his shoulder. He turns his head toward Minho, and he doesn’t know why exactly, but it surprises him when Minho decides to kiss him. He automatically reciprocates the kiss, tastes the alcohol on Minho’s tongue. It’s a whine from Felix that makes them stop, and again, Jisung feels his cheeks getting hotter.

With a push to his back, Minho guides him to bend forward so he can get access. It’s his fingers that enter again, and Jisung is grateful that Minho still thought to take it slow for a moment as he’s still adjusting to the intense sensation.

Then Minho slowly pulls his fingers out, sliding the lubed-up fingers over Jisung’s asshole. “How are you feeling?”

Jisung looks over his shoulder at Minho, pulse racing and out of breath, and nods. “I’m good,” he says, slightly shaky. “Ready.”

Minho nods and after applying another generous amount of lube, the head of his cock makes contact with his hole. Jisung immediately tenses up, his pulse racing like never before, but Minho caresses his back, reminding him to relax, and carefully he’s able to push past his rim.

Jisung can’t hold back an embarrassing whimper, and it makes Minho stop. As always, the stretch is more than any number of Minho’s small fingers can do, but in the end, it’s not more than he can handle either. “Keep going.”

Felix moans with him when Minho bottoms out, getting to a complete halt after Jisung is pushed as deep as possible inside Felix as well.

Insane. There’s no other way for Jisung to describe the feeling of being so full while his cock is tightly encased inside Felix. Insane. If Felix hadn’t sucked him off earlier, he’d for sure be done for already.

Then Minho starts moving, and it all gets so much worse. Nothing could have possibly prepared him for this, and he can do nothing else but let himself be controlled by the motion as Minho sets a rhythm, repeatedly fucking him into Felix. He’s not entirely sure his brain is still working at all, too many feelings and sensations going through his body at the same time. But it’s good. So fucking good.

Felix is looking up at them like he’s completely spellbound by what’s happening, his eyes flickering between Jisung and over his shoulder at Minho. He is clawing his fingers into Jisung’s arms, and he already sounds like he’s about to come any moment. And then he does. White spurting from his cock onto his stomach, face contorted with pleasure as he keeps his gaze on them, refusing to close his eyes

Jisung’s got half a mind to make Minho stop and give Felix a break to gather himself, but then Felix digs his nails deeper into his arms. “Don’t stop. Want hyung to fuck me while I’m full of your cum.”

Jisung lets out a whine when he hears that. Just another insanely hot thought from Felix to fuck with his mind.

Minho still stops, staying still with his hands on Jisung’s hips, but then he guides him to move. He’s letting Jisung be the one in charge now—if you can call it that when you feel absolutely dizzy and delirious with every move. Every time Jisung moves forward, his cock is pressed tight, leaving him breathless, and then next he pushes back, feeling Minho’s cock deep inside him, making him even more breathless.

He picks up the pace, moving in between the two extremes while moaning, and his legs quickly begin to feel like jelly, but he can’t stop moving. He’s too close. Feels too high on pleasure.

As if Minho knows that he’s struggling, he helps him stay moving with a firm grip on his hips, forcefully pulling him back and pushing him forward. Insane.

It’s like a shockwave when it finally hits. His world turns black for a moment as he comes, and if not for Minho’s steady hands on his hips, he’s sure his knees would budge. Like Felix wanted, he lets every drop fill him up, and he feels him clench around him. When his world stops spinning, and he feels conscious again, he falls forward to kiss Felix, whose arms immediately wrap around him, and he relaxes into the kiss completely.

Minho kisses him on the shoulder again, then slowly pulls out, and the emptiness is both a great loss and a relief with the overwhelming emotions still going through him, tears almost threatening to take over. He breaks the kiss before it’s all too much, and Felix lets him straighten up so he can pull out as well.

Felix plugs his hole with his fingers, keeping cum from dripping out, and when Jisung moves out of the way, Minho looks more than ready to take over. Jisung takes a seat at the top of the bed, leaning limply and exhausted against the headboard as he watches the other two.

Minho pushes Felix up the bed, making enough room for him to get in between his legs on his knees. His chest is visibly heaving but he pushes inside so slowly, still incredibly in control of himself. Felix, on the other hand, is looking up at him as if he’s close to breaking down.

“Hyung…” Felix pleads quietly when Minho is fully inside him but stays still. Minho leans forward, closing all distance between them to kiss him softly, but Felix whines like someone who is starving, desperate for more.

Calmly, Minho brushes his lips over Felix’s then whispers, “Mine.”

It’s deep and intimate, the way Minho says it, and Jisung feels goosebumps all over his arms, his spent hole clenching.

Felix must feel it too, because he gasps, his exhale caught in his throat for a moment, then breathily replies, “Yours.”

Minho finally kisses Felix the way he wants, not holding back, and Felix claws his nails into his back as if he can’t get him close enough. Jisung might as well not exist, but he’s got no reason to complain, he already got more than his fair share.

Minho starts moving his hips, and they fuck without their lips leaving each other for even a second. Like on a few earlier occasions, it almost feels too intimate for Jisung to witness.

Felix suddenly drops one hand onto the bed, reaching blindly in his direction. Carefully, Jisung takes his hand, and it must be what Felix was looking for because he entwines their fingers, squeezing tight. Even through this, he doesn’t forget about him.

Minho gets more insistent with his thrusts, the intensity rising, and pearls of sweat form all over, dripping down his body.

“Hyung—” Felix whines through a kiss but is interrupted by his own moans, and the blood flow to Jisung’s hand suffers as Felix squeezes it tighter. Minho tenses up as well, and their muffled moans blend as they both come, lips connected.

If Jisung was less relaxed and exhausted it might have bothered him how the two of them seem to be in perfect sync, like two people who have known each other their whole lives, but he just watches, content with Felix’s hand in his for now.

The brothers’ kisses turn slow and sloppy as they calm down, drops of sweat dripping from Minho onto Felix. When they part, Minho brushes his nose across Felix’s cheek and whispers something incomprehensible in his ear that makes him smile shyly. For a moment, despite his tiredness, jealousy is a disease and Jisung has it.

“Do you want to join the party again?” Minho then asks him loud enough for Jisung to hear and brushes a strand of hair away from Felix’s face.

Felix looks like he’s thinking it over for a moment, then shakes his head. “No.”

“Cuddle mood?”

Felix nods, giving him a tired smile. “Very.”

“I’ll go get us some water first.” Minho pecks him on the nose and proceeds to pull out, getting off of the bed.

Jisung loosens his grip on Felix’s hand, expecting him to let go now to get clean, but Felix doesn’t let him let go. Instead, looking at Jisung with a pair of big eyes, he pulls. Jisung follows the pull and gets beside Felix, who is asking to be kissed with a pair of puckered lips.

The kisses are gentle. Loving. Filling Jisung with warmth from head to toe.

“Here,” Minho interrupts them, handing them a pack of wet wipes. He’s not looking as naked as before, wearing a pair of sweatpants and a tee. Felix takes the pack, and Minho leaves the room.

They clean up the best they can and then get comfortable under the duvet when they begin to feel cold. Felix cuddles in close, and when Minho returns with three bottles of water, he hands them one each. He makes sure they all drink and then strips before getting in beside Felix.

Exhausted, they don’t say much, but huddle together as close as possible. Felix is lying between them, but they are all entangled, so Minho still feels very close to Jisung, his scent mixing with Felix’s.

Eventually, the only sound in the room is their collective calm breathing, and the sound of the bass from downstairs, where the party is still going on. Despite the music, it’s peaceful, and when Jisung falls asleep, he’s pretty sure it’s with a hand on his waist that doesn’t belong to Felix.

Jisung feels a pair of strong arms around him squeeze, spooned in a tight embrace from behind. It's nice and warm, and he feels in no hurry to get up, too comfortable in this cocoon. But then he hears the door open and close, and his eyes flutter open.

Felix is standing by the bed looking down at him.

It's the last thing Jisung expected to see because this means that the naked body currently pressed against him doesn't belong to Felix.

“Morning,” Felix says cheerily. His makeup has been removed, the gems all gone, but there are still a few smudged remains of makeup around his eyes.

The arms around Jisung disappear in an instant as Minho jumps up from the bed. He doesn’t spare Jisung a glance and pulls on a pair of underwear before going to peck Felix on the cheek.

“I’m gonna go to the bathroom,” Minho says and grabs a t-shirt on his way out, closing the door firmly behind him.

Felix turns to Jisung again, bending down with a smirk as he says, “You two looked cozy.” He gets on the bed and swings a leg over Jisung, making him get on his back as he straddles him. “Good morning,” Felix says again and leans down to kiss Jisung deeply, despite whatever morning breath he might have after a night of drinking. Jisung takes all of it.

“Good morning,” Jisung replies, dazed when Felix’s lips leave him. He caresses his cheek, which is impossibly soft underneath his fingers. “Did you sleep well?”

“Mhm,” Felix hums. “But I think I might be hit by a very unpleasant hangover soon.”

“Come here,” Jisung says and pulls Felix in to lie down on top of him.

Felix gets comfortable, lying completely limp with their bodies flush together, breathing as one. Silently, Jisung strokes Felix’s back, breathes in the soothing scent of his hair.

They’ve both been drifting off when Jisung is once again brought back to reality by the sound of the door.

“I ordered some kimchi jjigae,” Minho says as he enters.

“Thank you, hyung.” Felix offers him a tired but fond smile. Jisung doesn’t say anything, just eyes Minho curiously, not quite certain if the plans include him.

Minho lies down on the other side of the bed, and Felix immediately melts down beside Jisung. The brothers share a soft kiss, and then Felix reaches behind him, pulling Jisung’s arm around him, finding a sweet spot right in between them.

Jisung is unsure where exactly to rest his hand, holding it awkwardly on Felix’s waist while trying not to touch Minho now that they are all sober, but then his breath hitches when Minho, who is clearly more concerned with getting comfortable than not touching Jisung, drapes his arm over both of them, his hand landing on the small of Jisung’s back.

Minho isn’t looking at him over Felix’s head, and Jisung is fairly sure Minho doesn’t care enough to pay him any real mind. Slowly, Jisung unfreezes, trying to make his reaction to the hand on his back less obvious, and lets his hand find a more comfortable spot on Minho's waist.

It’s weird, and it takes him a few deep breaths, but then he relaxes, soon falling into a slumber.

No one moves until Minho’s phone vibrates, and he has to go downstairs to receive the order.

Jisung takes the opportunity to get dressed and make a quick trip to the bathroom. When he returns, Minho and Felix are sitting on the floor with containers of rice and jjigae laid out between them.

Jisung feels unsure for a moment, but then Minho hands him a pair of chopsticks that he just split.

“Thanks,” Jisung says as he finds a spot on the floor as well.

Minho pushes one of the stews in his direction. “It’s good for hangovers.”

They eat in relative silence, all three of them tired after last night, but it’s surprisingly not as unnerving as Jisung would’ve expected, just a comfortable quiet as they fill their stomachs.

They pack up the trash, and Jisung takes a look out the window. It’s already quite dark outside, and he realizes that he has zero sense of what time it is, and pulls out his phone. It's already late afternoon and, shit, it's Monday. He needs to get going before Minho makes him. They have a deal.

“I'm gonna head for the dorm,” Jisung says, stretching his arms. “I really need a shower.”

“Oh, that sounds good! I'm coming with you,” Felix says, happily, getting up from the floor as well.

“Don't feel like you have to because of me.” Jisung glances nervously at Minho, but Minho doesn’t look like he’s about to jump him for making Felix leave, just quietly gets up.

“Please, I’m desperate for a shower and a change of clothes,” Felix says and then turns to peck Minho on the cheek. “I'll be back later, hyung.”

Before Felix can get too far, Minho pulls Felix back in, and Jisung rolls his eyes as Minho puts on a real show kissing him, looking like he's trying to swallow Felix whole. Jisung decides to look away.

When Minho lets go again, Felix's lips look more than just a little bit puckered after the lewd display, and Jisung has to hold back a grunt.

With Felix ready to go, Jisung hesitates by the door. Is he supposed to kiss Minho goodbye too? For the sake of keeping up appearances?

“See you,” Minho then says before Jisung can decide and gives him a quick wave.

“See you,” Jisung repeats with a nod and opens the door.

Downstairs, there’s a whole bunch of people lounging about on the couches and mattresses scattered on the floor, while a movie is playing on the wall, cast by the projector from yesterday. The house is still quite a mess, bottles and cups left around in odd places, but Jisung is sure it's been worse, the house looking like at least half an effort has been made to tidy up before passing out in the living room.

Jisung wonders if he and Felix should be more discreet, sneaking past unnoticed, but not even one of the people watching the movie turns their head toward them, all of them looking barely awake after partying too hard. Besides, there shouldn’t be anything too weird about crashing after a night of heavy drinking, right?

They hurry back to the dorm, the cold outside not very welcome, but the air is fresh and crisp, helping clear Jisung’s head. His hangover has been pretty vacant so far, but he isn’t taking any chances and needs to get that shower out of the way before it potentially hits, so he immediately gets his things.

The communal showers are empty when they enter, most people still not back at college (or probably dead for the day after partying), and after brushing their teeth, they get in shower stalls next to each other.

“Jisungie,” Felix suddenly calls from the other side of the thin wall separating them. “Can I borrow some shower gel?”

Jisung peeks out from behind the shower curtain and after confirming that the place is still empty aside from the two of them, he pulls open the one beside him where a naked Felix is standing underneath a hot stream of water, looking very inviting.

Jisung lifts up his sponge. “If you scrub my back, I'll scrub yours?”

Felix laughs. “Only if I get to start.”

Jisung takes that as “yes” and swiftly gets in behind Felix.

He begins gliding the sponge across Felix’s back to the sound of Felix humming contentedly, but then he suddenly decides to drop the sponge to the floor, an urge he can’t resist taking over. Instead, he snakes his arms around Felix’s waist to hold him, pressing his chest against his back.

“Do I finally get you all to myself?” Jisung asks and kisses Felix’s neck softly. It’s nothing sexual, just the overwhelming need to feel Felix and hold him as close as possible.

Felix hums and relaxes into the embrace, resting his head on Jisung’s shoulder and swaying their bodies a bit, seemingly perfectly content.

“Has it been that bad?” Felix then asks, turning his head. “It looked like you both enjoyed it. I know I did.” He smiles, and Jisung doesn’t doubt that he means it.

Yeah, Jisung enjoyed last night, he can’t deny that. It was something he never thought he’d ever experience. But nothing beats being alone with Felix.

He must have been quiet for too long, staring at the wall, because Felix turns around, circling his arms around Jisung’s neck.

“If it’s too much,” Felix starts, his big innocent eyes looking straight into Jisung’s. “You know that you can always say no, right?”

Jisung can’t help but smile. The way Felix cares is so genuine. “Are you happy?” Jisung asks.

“Very happy,” Felix answers earnestly.

“Then I am happy, too.”

They kiss and Jisung’s whole body is full of dozens of butterflies flapping their wings.

Caught in the moment as their lips stay attached, they get under the cascading water until Jisung in his eagerness accidentally backs Felix against the wall, hearing him hiss as he hits the cold tiles. Jisung didn’t intend for it to happen—being in a public place not appropriate for something like this at all—but then Felix doesn’t stop kissing him, only pulls him closer, sliding their bodies against each other. It’s only natural that they both begin to fill out below.

Jisung feels Felix’s cock rub against him, but since they are currently all alone, not disturbing anyone, Jisung’s horny brain sees no reason to stop him. Jisung should’ve probably already have had enough after yesterday, feel more than satisfied for a while, but with Felix, there is no such thing as enough.

Following Felix’s lead, Jisung adjusts himself, and together they grind against each other’s thighs, quietly moaning through kisses.

Then Felix lets out a sudden high moan that sends tingles down Jisung’s back.

“Shh,” Jisung shushes him through a smile, but then Jisung is the one to let out too loud a sound as Felix digs his fingers into Jisung’s ass. The way Felix’s movement starts feeling desperate does things to Jisung, and the same kind of desperation builds inside him. He hoists Felix’s left leg up, grabbing his thigh tight while rutting against the other.

They are both panting, trying to keep their breaths under control, but then Felix gets louder again. Jisung doesn’t want to shut him up, but they can’t be caught doing what they are doing, so he pushes their lips together, catching every moan.

Jisung knows when Felix comes, his hips stuttering and his lips not able to keep up with the kisses. It works like a trigger, pushing Jisung over the edge to join him, and Jisung is thankful that the sound of the water hitting the floor helps drown them out.

The sudden sound of footsteps makes them freeze.

They look at each other panicked for a moment, but their faces quickly turn into ones struggling to hold back giggles. As quiet as possible, they wait for the person to leave again, but instead they hear the sound of another shower turning on.

With no other choice, Jisung carefully lets Felix put his leg down and pulls back, revealing the sticky mess between them.

Jisung moves to retreat to his own stall, but Felix pulls him back, kissing him wetly under the water one last time. With a dopey grin on his face, Jisung sneaks back into his own stall to finish what he originally came for.

They’ve got time to cuddle a bit when they get back to their room, not even bothering to get fully dressed before lying down in Jisung’s bed.

“Are you spending the night?” Jisung asks Felix, knowing that since none of them have to be up for classes, that that might very well be the case when he goes back to Minho.

“I hadn’t thought about that. Maybe?” Felix says, tilting his head. “Will you be okay if I do?”

It’s selfish of him not to be, right?

“I’ll live,” Jisung answers with a wink, then jokingly adds, “But I’ll miss you terribly.”

“Yeah, you will.” Felix chuckles and boops him on the nose.

Monday nights still suck.

Felix left not even two hours ago, and Jisung already has a hard time dealing with that fact. It’s even harder than before, because now he knows what the brothers get up to when they are alone in Minho’s room. But he and Minho made a deal, and he’ll just have to learn how to suck it up.

But Changbin comes to his rescue. It’s only the first day of the year, but of course he’s planning on getting the very first gym session in the bag already. If Changbin didn’t have a boyfriend, Jisung might be worried that the gym is all he’s up to when they don’t hang out.

“Great party yesterday,” Changbin says, when they return to the gym’s locker rooms, wiping his sweaty forehead with a towel.

“Yeah, it was pretty good,” Jisung says, then bumps his hip playfully into Changbin’s on the way to his locker. “Even though you suddenly disappeared.”

Changbin gives him a lopsided smile. “I had a pretty good reason. Besides, you did it first!”

“I’m sure you had an excellent reason.” Jisung winks at him.

“What about you? You’re not hanging with Felix tonight? I honestly didn’t expect you to be up for a workout.”

Jisung sighs, sitting down on the wooden bench behind him. “It’s Monday.”

Changbin raises an eyebrow and sits down beside him. “I am well aware, but what does that have to do with anything?”

“Monday nights mean that Felix is with Minho,” Jisung explains, then waves his hands around. “Doing whatever it is they do when they’re alone.”

“Ouch.”

“Yeah…” It’s all quiet for a moment, both of them taking a drink from their water bottles.

“Well, from now on, I say we make every Monday night gym night then!” Changbin suddenly says with great determination. “Get your mind off of things.”

Jisung smiles at his best friend. “That’d be nice.”

“What exactly is your situation with them at the moment? If you don’t mind me asking.”

Jisung looks around the locker room, but no one in their right mind would spend the first day of the year working out aside from them. “Short explanation, we fuck.”

“Shit. So you’re just living a life of never ending threesomes now?”

Jisung snorts. “It’s not as great as it sounds,” he says, but then remembers exactly what happened last night. “Actually, that part is pretty great.”

Jisung chuckles, and Changbin shakes his head as if he can’t believe what he’s up to.

“But it’s a little more complicated than that.”

Jisung proceeds to fill Changbin in on everything that happened when he visited Felix. How he and Minho actually ended up “fucking it out” like Changbin had suggested and then made a deal. Changbin listens intently with his eyebrows furrowed, and he quietly nods when Jisung tells him about the “never at home”-rule the brothers have.

Despite his unwillingness to share any details in the past, it’s a relief to get it all out and have someone on his side in all of this. He even tells him about their day out and teaching Minho how to skate, and Changbin grins widely, clearly imagining the sight of the older struggling.

“So, to sum it up, you are fake-dating, but only in front of Felix. To everyone else, you are faking that you aren’t involved at all. Faking that you’re not fake-dating!” Changbin says with a bright smile, looking pleased with himself.

“Sure, you can call it that,” Jisung says, shaking his head at the silly summary.

“And every Monday night, you aren’t allowed anywhere near, and they—without you.”

“It’s a very real possibility, yeah.”

“That sucks.”

“But Monday nights will be better from now on, right?” Jisung says, finding a smile.

“You bet.”

Working out is a great idea. Working out means hanging out with his best friend and being tired enough to fall asleep alone.

However, to Jisung’s surprise, Felix does come back late that night before he’s fallen asleep, and slips in right beside him. He smells of Minho, but Jisung couldn’t care less.

In the following days, Jisung gets to be completely Minho-free. It’s like a breath of fresh air not having to worry about him at all for so long.

He doesn’t have anything in particular planned for the month of January since the next semester doesn’t start till February. He could’ve, of course, gone back home, but staying at the dorms with Felix by far outweighs that option, especially since Changbin also decided to stay.

They spend the next couple of days just lounging around, hanging out with Changbin and Hyunjin too, meeting up for dinner, and playing board games. Minho is apparently busy with other things because Felix doesn’t go to see him, or maybe it’s part of not looking too obvious that Felix doesn’t constantly hang around at the frat like Jisung would’ve honestly expected him to. Or maybe it’s just that Felix still likes hanging out with just Jisung.

It’s not until one afternoon that there’s a knock on the door to their room and Jisung goes to open it, that he’s confronted with Minho’s face again.

“I'm here to see Felix,” Minho says immediately, not giving Jisung the chance to question him before he enters the room, walking right past him.

“Felix went to meet up with a classmate,” Jisung says, still holding open the door. “I don't know when he'll be back.”

“I'll wait,” Minho says and sits down on Felix's bed, pulling out his phone.

“Okay.” Jisung closes the door and mimics Minho’s actions on his own side of the room, sitting on the bed with his phone out, doing his best to ignore the unexpected presence.

But it’s harder than expected. It's weird being in the same room as Minho like this, minding their own business after seeing each other naked several times and being constantly vigilant around each other. But they've got nothing to say to each other, nothing further to discuss. They aren't in a relationship, they aren't even friends. Just two people who happen to like the same person, and, by that, forced to tolerate each other.

That's why it comes as a shock when Minho suddenly says, “We should go on a date.”

Jisung looks up from his phone, blinking confusedly at Minho who is staring at him with a rather blank expression. “What?”

“Go on a date,” Minho repeats.

“You want to—” Jisung pauses. Minho wants to go on a date with him?

“I mean, yeah?” Minho shrugs his shoulders. “It would make Felix really happy if the three of us went out.”

Jisung, you're an idiot.

Of fucking course, Minho didn’t just ask him out on a date. Alone. That would’ve been absurd. Insane even.

“Yeah, we definitely should,” Jisung quickly says, hoping his moment of insanity isn't visible on his face. “What do you suggest?”

“I don’t know. Maybe check out the Winter Lights Festival?”

Jisung nods. It honestly isn’t a bad idea at all. “That sounds good.”

“Tomorrow?” Minho asks, tilting his head.

“Suits me.”

Minho then jumps to his feet, headed for the door. “See you, tomorrow.”

He leaves, and Jisung is, once again, a little puzzled by the person that is Lee Minho.

It's early evening when Jisung walks with Felix to the parking lot. Late enough for it to soon be dark and do the Winter Lights justice. Minho will be driving, of course.

When Felix returned to the dorm yesterday after Minho's visit, he already knew about the date. It left Jisung wondering whether Minho told him after he left, or if maybe they talked before Minho even came to the dorm and Felix had told him to ask him. Not that it matters.

The temperature is close to freezing tonight, but the sky is clear, perfect for an evening out, and all bundled up in their padded jackets, the cold won’t be a problem.

There’s no doubt they are in the right place when they arrive at the festival. The lights are pretty and absolutely everywhere.

Felix’s face lights up, and the first thing he does is link their arms, walking into the middle of it all with a guy on each arm.

There are a lot of families with children, but there are at least just as many couples around. It’s quite the romantic atmosphere, walking around surrounded by the many light installations in different colors, some of them even shaped as hearts. Felix's excitement doesn’t falter, taking pictures of everything.

Jisung doesn’t say a whole lot, but neither does Minho, both of them happy just to follow Felix and pose for a picture anytime he asks them to.

They also pass several carts with street food, and after having looked around for a bit, they decide to grab a bite.

Jisung is about to pull out his wallet to pay for at least his share of kimchi jeon and kimbab, when Minho reaches a hand in front of him to pay the ahjumma for everything.

It’s just him and Minho right now, Felix having run off to get something else he wanted while they were waiting, but Jisung knows better than to protest right then and there. The woman hands them the food, and they quickly find a place to sit nearby.

“You don’t have to always pay for me,” Jisung says while they wait for Felix to return so they can eat together. Minho and him aren’t dating, and they aren’t really friends. There’s no reason Minho should be paying for him.

“I’m the eldest,” Minho says matter-of-factly.

“I know, but you don’t have to—”

“Do you have a problem with my money, Jisung?” Minho asks, raising an intimidating eyebrow.

“No, but—” Jisung starts, but Minho stares coldly into his soul, and it feels pointless to try and get anything through. “Thank you…” he ultimately mutters, not up for challenging Minho.

Internally, Jisung rolls his eyes. Even when Minho does something nice, it feels like a threat. Or maybe he's not really being nice, but just trying to uphold whatever image he's got in front of Felix. Felix, who clearly thinks very highly of Minho. But how much of it is genuine and how much is pretend? It wouldn’t be the first time that there’s something Felix doesn’t have quite right about his hyung. Which reminds Jisung that—

“Felix told me you only top.”

Minho shrugs his shoulders. “Yeah, so what?”

“As in, he says you never ever bottom.”

“Your point being?”

“So, what happened on Halloween,” Jisung says cockily since he already knows he’s going to win this one. “That wasn’t you?”

“What happened on Halloween?” Felix is tilting his head, looking down at them back with sotteok skewers on a paper plate in hand.

“Nothing happened,” Minho quickly says and pulls Felix down on the chair beside him.

Jisung snorts. “Oh, must have been your twin jumping on my dick then.” He didn't mean to lay it out so bluntly, but Minho is still so aggravating at times. He brings that side out in him.

Minho’s eyes widen, and Felix lets out a loud gasp. His shocked expression is like ripped out of a comic book as he pulls back to look at Minho and then panning to Jisung.

“You fucked hyung?!” Felix asks, not paying any mind to anyone around them, but thankfully no one seems close enough to have heard it.

Jisung doesn’t feel the need to answer but just looks at Minho, enjoying the way he is visibly panicking, tense in his seat. Minho’s reaction is answer enough.

Apparently Felix thinks so too because his eyes turn full of sparkles, looking at Minho when he says, “I want to see that!”

That unfreezes Minho, who lets out a resolute, “No.”

Felix’s sparkle disappears, looking like he was just denied a great present. Which, arguably, he was. “No?”

“No,” Minho repeats.

“Why not?” Felix asks with the poutiest lips known to mankind.

“I—” Minho starts while looking at Felix, but then looks away. “It’s just not my thing.”

“That’s okay, hyung,” Felix says and leans his head on Minho’s shoulder.

Jisung could just let it end there, save Minho from any further embarrassment, or he could—

“You didn’t enjoy it? Because as far as I remember, you didn’t have any issues with what was happening at all. I mean, you even asked for a second round.”

Felix's mind seems like it’s being blown away for the second time, and Minho couldn’t possibly look more flustered and annoyed with Jisung, his ears turning fire red. Jisung kind of loves it.

Felix’s words suddenly make his mind wander. He wants to see it. Would Jisung want to fuck Minho again if he could? Fuck an embarrassed, whining Minho, who is trying to do his best to not appear weak in front of Felix…

Jisung’s dick twitches in his pants. Shit.

“Or maybe it’s just that your ego is too fragile,” he blurts out, not about to let this topic go. “And you can’t handle letting Felix see you like that.”

The meaning seems to register with Felix, and his expression turns worried. “Hyung, is that it?” he asks weakly, sounding hurt. “But do you think less of me just because I bottom?”

Minho whips his head around, looking at him in shock. “No, of course not!”

“You know I would never think any less of you, either,” Felix says and squeezes Minho’s hand.

“I know, but—” Minho pauses, shaking his head. “I’ll think about it, okay?”

Felix beams, shining brighter than the sun, and pecks Minho on the cheek. “Thank you, hyung!”

Jisung chuckles to himself. And his dick twitches again.

“Oh my god! We need to get on the Ferris wheel. Come on!” Felix promptly grabs their hands, pulling them toward the enormous turning wheel.

As they get nearer, Jisung looks up at it apprehensively. He would honestly much rather stay on the ground. Ferris wheels aren’t really his thing. Heights in general aren’t, but Felix doesn’t know that since it’s never come up.

“I bet all the lights are so pretty from up there,” Felix says as they get in line. “Don’t you think?”

Jisung can’t think what to answer, trying his best not to think about the view from above.

It turns out that they came at “a good time” because the wheel is currently emptying and filling up for the next round, and it looks like they’ll make it.

Jisung is deep in his head, his pulse rising with every step they get closer. The logical thing would be to just tell them that he’s not a big fan of heights. Felix would never make fun of him for that, he’s sure, but there’s something about being in Minho’s company that makes him less inclined to admit such a thing.

“Only two people at a time.”

Jisung lifts his head at the employee’s words. This is his chance to get out of it.

“You two go, I’ll stay behind.”

Jisung swiftly turns to look at Minho. He beat him to it. Saying the words Jisung had just planned to utter himself.

“Oh, I’m fine staying behind,” Jisung quickly says, trying to sound as genuine as possible, and not like he’s keen to get out of a less-than-enjoyable situation. “You go.”

Minho shakes his head, smiling. “I insist. You shouldn’t miss it because of me.”

Of course, the one time Jisung really doesn’t need Minho to be nice, he is. He can never win with this guy. “I insist, too.”

“Oh, you two,” Felix cuts in, beaming. “You know what, you two take this one. No one should miss it!”

“But what about y—” Minho starts, but Felix ushers them forward, pushing their backs.

“I’ll take the next one on my own. Now get on!”

They don’t get another chance to object, and before Jisung knows it, he’s seated with Minho beside him.

It’s fine. It’ll be just fine. He can just close his eyes for the duration of the ride and he’ll be fine. Except Minho will be there with him, and with no Felix around, he’s got no reason to be nice to him. He’ll just have to hope that Minho will leave him alone and not make this a worse experience than it already is.

Jisung’s stomach flips when the Ferris wheel moves, and he closes his eyes, but they quickly stop again, the Ferris wheel only rotating enough so that the next people can get on. But even though they barely left the ground, Jisung can’t make himself look and check that Felix got on board. He takes a deep breath, and it moves again.

It’s only at the next stop that Jisung notices how eerily silent Minho is beside him. They are sitting close enough for their knees to touch, but Jisung hasn’t felt Minho’s presence at all. Too curious, Jisung dares take a peek.

Minho has his eyes squeezed tight, clutching the safety bar with both hands, so hard his knuckles have turned white. He seems to be silently chanting something, his lips moving without sound.

“Are you alright?” Jisung asks, thrown off by the unexpected sight, but Minho doesn’t react, only keeps on chanting. Carefully, Jisung places a hand on Minho’s thigh to get his attention, but as soon as he touches him, Minho flinches.

“What are you doing?” Minho looks almost offended when he turns his head to look at Jisung, but it’s only a quick glance before his eyes widen, and he hurriedly shuts them again.

Jisung studies him quietly for a moment, too taken aback to care much about the height at the moment. There’s something oddly calming about having someone else in a worse condition than himself.

“I’m not a big fan of heights either,” he then says.

“I’m not afraid of heights!” Minho immediately shoots but doesn’t look at him this time.

“Your eyes are literally closed.”

“I’m fine,” Minho says, but his eyes stay firmly shut.

Jisung shakes his head. “This is why you didn’t want to go, isn’t it? Another thing you’ve kept from Felix, always trying to act all tough and strong.”

Minho grunts. Bingo.

“If you don’t tell anyone, neither will I.” Jisung bumps an open hand into Minho’s arm, and Minho gives what touched him a look.

“I said, I’m fine! See?” Minho makes a big number out of keeping his eyes open this time, but his stiff neck tells a different story than being fine.

“Okay then.”

Jisung is about to pull his hand back, but then the Ferris wheel jolts worse than before, startling both of them, and Minho grabs it. Jisung expects Minho to quickly let go again, but then the wheel starts its full turns and Minho holds tightly onto him.

Minho doesn’t let go even once. At the beginning, Jisung feels like he’s losing blood flow, but somewhere halfway it seems that Minho is able to relax a little bit, and he loosens his death grip to something a bit more comfortable (but still way tighter than necessary).

They don’t talk for the duration of the ride, both of them entering a state of inner peace to try and ignore the current situation, but Minho’s hand in Jisung’s feels grounding and reassuring.

When the wheel finally stops again, and it’s their time to get off, their hands are sweaty. Jisung is sure he’ll never hear a thing about it ever, but when Minho lets go of him and gets up, he murmurs a low “thank you.”

As expected, Felix had a blast when he joins them on the ground, and both of them nod enthusiastically, agreeing that the view was indeed amazing.

Felix’s eyes never stop sparkling as they continue their walk around the fair. He’s currently in awe in front of a giant weeping willow tree, where the long leafless branches are all lit up with fairy lights, hanging beautifully.

Compelled to capture the moment when Felix walks under the lights, Jisung takes out his phone. He lets out a sigh. Felix looks magical. Every part of him lit up and glowing. He snaps a few pictures without Felix noticing before Minho gets in the way, joining Felix under the tree.

Looking up at the lights, the brothers share the same sparkle in their eyes, and Jisung can’t help but take a few more pictures. Then Felix finally notices and waves him over. “Let’s take one together!”

Jisung gets beside Felix and holds up his phone, but before he can get them all in frame, Minho steps aside.

“You don’t want to be in it?” Jisung immediately asks. “I won’t be posting it anywhere unless you want to.”

Minho looks hesitant for a moment, but then gets in front of the phone.

“You’re freezing,” Minho says to Felix when they've taken as many pictures as Felix wanted, and tucks Felix’s scarf tighter around the younger's neck. “We should get going.”

“But it’s still so early,” Felix says, pouting, but Jisung sees the way he's shivering from the cold.

“We could watch a movie in my room?” Minho offers and even glances at Jisung questioningly. “Buy some snacks on the way.”

“That sounds nice,” Jisung chimes in, nodding.

Felix beams.

Back at the frat, the house is unexpectedly empty. By far the emptiest Jisung has ever seen.

“A lot of people went on vacation after New Year’s,” Minho explains when Jisung looks around for the missing people.

Jisung nods and is reminded that Chan was going on a trip with Seonghwa as well and that’s why they haven’t met up to make music in the new year yet.

Minho’s got a TV in his room, facing the bed, and when Felix suggests an anime, Minho is quick to put it on. They get comfortable on the bed, leaning against the headboard as they watch. Felix is in the middle, of course, munching on some of his beloved chocolate raisins that he picked up on their way back.

They haven’t gotten very far, when from the other side of Felix, Minho says, “I’m not letting you prep me.”

The comment is so out of left field that Jisung isn’t sure he heard it right. Felix reacts first, blinking confusedly. “You what?”

“I’m doing my own prepping. Alone,” Minho elaborates. “If this is going to happen.”

Felix's jaw drops, and so does Jisung’s.

“You’re saying that—?” Felix doesn’t finish the sentence, just looks at Minho in awe.

“I’m saying that if everyone is up for it, I’m gonna go take a shower. And when I get back, I’ll bottom. For Jisung,” he adds the last bit in a hurry.

Felix looks like it’s Christmas all over again. And he doesn’t seem to be the least bit discouraged by the part about it being for Jisung only. That’s what he wanted to see anyway.

“So?” Minho looks at Jisung, waiting for his response to all of it.

“Sure. I mean, yeah, I’m ready when you are.” It’s not a lie. The moment Minho brought it up again, Jisung felt something stir inside of him.

“Good. Guess I’ll go take a shower then.” Without further comment, Minho gets up and grabs a few things along with a towel before leaving.

Felix is still looking shocked, staring at the closed door. Jisung is honestly quite shocked himself, but since they have a moment alone, he decides to take advantage of it.

“Hey,” Jisung says and turns Felix's head toward him with a hand on his cheek so he can kiss him. Felix immediately accepts, and they are clearly both already feeling a little hot, Jisung getting half on top of Felix as they lie down.

Felix gets him hard in no time with the way he kisses him, sliding a hand up his shirt before traveling it downward to palm him through his jeans.

“I want you to focus on only hyung, okay?” Felix says as Jisung’s lips trail down his neck. “Forget about me, I don't want to risk him getting too self-conscious and wanting to stop because of that.”

Jisung lifts his head. “Are you sure?”

But Felix is probably making a good point. Minho can be unpredictable like that, and in this particular situation, it’s hard to say what he might do after the way he initially reacted to the suggestion.

Felix hums. “I think it’s better like that.”

Jisung nods. It’s gonna be hard to ignore Felix, but he’ll do his best.

When Minho returns a little while later, he looks slightly out of it. His hair is damp and messy, his cheeks rosy from what was clearly a steamy shower. Jisung can’t help but let his mind wander, thinking of Minho in the shower with his fingers inside himself, getting all worked up and ready for him. Jisung shudders, and his cock twitches for the tenth time that night.

Felix gets up, pecking Minho on the lips.

“You look hot,” he says, batting his eyelashes.

Minho’s ears turn as red as his cheeks. “Are you sure you want to see this?” he asks quietly.

“Very sure,” Felix answers softly. “But only if you are sure, too.”

“I’m just— But what if you—” Minho pauses and lets out a sigh. “What if this changes things between us?”

“Silly, hyung,” Felix just answers and then goes in for a deep kiss that says more than any words could. Still, as Felix pulls back, Jisung is sure he hears Felix whisper, “I love you”.

Jisung has to suppress any feelings the declaration of love stirs inside him. Now is not the time. There are far more important and exciting things about to happen.

“Just ignore me. I’ll be in the chair quiet as a mouse, okay?”

Minho nods, and Felix smiles before turning back to Jisung still on the bed. He bends down, giving Jisung a soft lingering kiss that dispels any bubbling unwanted feelings inside him.

“I know you’ll take good care of hyung.” Felix pecks him on the lips and gives him a reassuring smile. Jisung nods. Satisfied, Felix promptly goes to sit in the chair Minho was sitting in last time, immediately looking very expectantly at the two of them.

Jisung looks up at Minho, who is still standing in the same spot, looking unsure how to proceed from there. The ball is in their court now, but Minho doesn’t move, just stares back blankly.

Jisung raises an eyebrow, hoping to get some sort of sign, but then Minho breaks eye contact, looking away at nothing in particular. It’s clear that he isn’t going to be the one making any decisions, perhaps too self-conscious already.

So Jisung gets up and walks over. He’ll have to be the one leading them.

He stops right in front of Minho, barely able to get any closer without touching, and Minho looks up again.

Honestly, Jisung isn’t quite sure how to proceed either. They’ve never had to force anything between them, things just always “happened”. So where do you start when that’s the case? Before he can overthink it, he puts a hand on Minho's hip, sliding it up underneath his shirt.

Minho's body feels tense underneath his hand, like his next exhale got stuck in his throat. Jisung moves his hand further up.

“It’s not too late to change your mind,” Jisung whispers as he feels Minho's heart hammering through his chest. He doesn't miss the way Minho's eyes follow the movement of his lips.

Minho releases the exhale. “Do your worst,” he answers, cocky as always.

Jisung smirks, suddenly feeling much more at ease. That’s what was missing, wasn’t it? Minho being Minho. Without further hesitation, he moves his hand to the small of Minho's back, and yanks him in, pressing their bodies together. Minho yelps at the sudden movement, his back forced into an arch, but he doesn’t protest, just looks at Jisung awaiting.

Jisung’s fingers glide down and reach the top of the low-hanging sweatpants Minho changed into after showering. He stops there, lifting an eyebrow. “How prepped are you?”

It’s an honest question, letting Jisung know what he’s got to work with, but he doesn’t quite wait for an answer before his fingers move past the loose elastic hem.

To Jisung's surprise, he feels nothing but skin. He freezes for a split second, but then cocks his head questioningly at the other. Minho hasn’t bothered to put on any underwear. Minho does a slight shrug of one shoulder, and Jisung snorts.

Without anything in the way, Jisung smoothly glides down Minho’s ass until he hears him gasp as his fingers find his hole. It’s wet with lube, and Jisung easily slips the tip of one finger inside. Minho clenches, but he doesn’t stop him, instead Jisung feels him lean closer, pressing his hard cock against him.

“Prepped enough,” Minho breathes heavily, sounding much less cocky already.

Jisung pulls out his finger that got barely half-deep and steps back, nodding to the bed. “Strip and get on the bed then.”

Almost too obedient, Minho takes off his clothes, but without looking at Felix even once while doing so. Once finished, he gets on the bed. “How do you want me?”

It’s almost too much, the way he’s looking up at Jisung, naked, with big blinking eyes. As if he just asked him a completely normal question.

How does he want him?

At this moment? Any way possible.

Jisung hurriedly throws his own clothes to the floor, his hard cock eagerly springing free, and then gets on the bed, crawling over Minho as he forces him back on the bed. He stops, taking a moment to admire the body now caged fully in between his hands and knees. Minho’s ridiculously fit body, with his cock hard and glistening against his stomach muscles.

Right below him, Minho’s face doesn’t reveal much, but his rapidly rising chest betrays him. Jisung wants to ruin him so much.

How does he want him?

“Turn around.”

Jisung doesn’t wait for Minho to do it himself, and with little difficulty, he flips an unprepared Minho onto his knees. Minho falls onto his elbows, not fast enough to catch himself on his hands. But all the more better. At this angle he is now fully exposed, his puckered and already used hole right in front of Jisung to take. Pink and wet…

It would be a shame not to have a taste.

Jisung leans down, spreading Minho’s asscheeks further apart with a hand on each, and drags his tongue over the entrance. The hole clenches again as a stifled sound comes from Minho. Jisung can’t see his face, but he’s sure Minho would stop him if he didn’t approve. So he goes in again, licking around the rim, feeling the grooves with his tongue before sticking the tip of it inside.

Minho is quiet. Only very few sounds escaping him. But when Jisung straightens up and looks down at him, he’s clutching the sheets, the side of his face pushed into the mattress. His eyes are squeezed shut, and his lips pressed together. When Jisung doesn’t touch him again, he lets out a deep exhale.

Jisung should’ve known. Minho will be trying his hardest not to let go, keep his composure the best he can. It only adds fuel to the fire inside Jisung.

Minho gets a longer break when Jisung reaches for the lube ready on the nightstand. He takes a glance at Felix before he remembers that he shouldn’t and quickly looks away again, but it’s enough to notice the way Felix is tensed up watching them, full of anticipation at the edge of his seat.

Just like how Minho watching Jisung fuck Felix added another layer, Felix watching this time adds a different flavor to the mix. Because Minho is afraid of being shown like this, and Felix wants to see it. What a sweet flavor.

With that in mind, Jisung lubes up his cock, and directs it to Minho’s pulsing hole, breaching the entrance.

Minho said he was prepped enough, but he’s still tight.

Jisung can’t hold back a low groan. Maybe Minho likes it like that. Not being fully stretched before letting cock split him open so he can feel it even more. It’s a dizzying thought. And if that is the case, then who is Jisung to deny Minho exactly that? Besides, it feels so so good.

But when Jisung bottoms out with a breathy moan, Minho looks like he might be in actual pain, and he pauses. “Are you okay?”

“Mhm,” Minho hums affirmatively but unconvincingly as he winces.

“Are you sure? Because—”

“Fuck, Jisung! Stop worrying and just fuck me!” Minho half-yells, desperation apparent in his voice. Jisung’s eyes widen, and he isn’t the only one caught off guard. From beside them, Felix lets out a sound somewhere between a surprised gasp and a whine.

Jisung’s first instinct is to take a look, but Felix’s earlier words stop him, but then Minho is the one to shift and look to the other side, pure horror and embarrassment immediately crossing his face.

Felix doesn’t say anything, blinking nervously while frozen in place with both knees pulled up, a hand between his legs with half a finger inside himself. Jisung’s stomach flips.

But then Minho groans and hides his face in a pillow, and Jisung snaps back.

If there was a way to be inside two people at the same time, he wouldn’t hesitate, but now he’s got an adorably blushing Minho who needs his full attention before he dies of embarrassment.

Jisung pulls back and immediately thrusts forward without warning. He doesn’t need to be told again. Minho yelps but keeps his head buried deep in the pillow.

Slowly, Jisung starts thrusting in earnest, finding a rhythm. Minho soon gives in, not able to breathe properly, and lifts his head, fully moaning with every impact.

Minho gets increasingly more unhinged, and if the frat house wasn’t mostly empty, Jisung is sure he never would have agreed to this. He can only assume that Eunwoo, who he knows lives on the other side of the wall that the bed is currently banging against, isn’t home either.

Then Jisung can’t help it. No matter what Felix told him. He just can’t.

He pulls Minho up, making him arch his back, and wraps an arm around his upper body. Minho’s body is exposed to Felix, but what Felix can’t see from the side, is the movement of Jisung’s lips by Minho’s ear.

“Look at you taking me so well while Felix is watching,” Jisung whispers directly into Minho’s ear, the words meant for Minho only. “Letting him see how helpless you are when stuffed full of cock.”

It has the intended effect. Minho lets out a whimper, sounding so weak and vulnerable, it feeds the hunger inside Jisung but at the same time makes him want so much more. With a tight grip around Minho’s upper body, Jisung fucks him in the upright position, and Minho whines almost pathetically.

“So, so whiny,” Jisung whispers, and it only makes Minho whine more.

They are such different sounds than what Jisung is used to hearing from Minho. He knows he needs to savor this moment.

In a swift decision, Jisung decides that he needs to see Minho fully. He pulls out harshly, but he doesn’t give Minho the chance to complain about his absence. He quickly throws Minho onto his back and yanks the legs of a very surprised looking Minho onto his shoulders before pushing inside again.

He’s got a tight grip on Minho’s hips, pulling him in as he thrusts forward, getting as deep as he possibly can. And the moans coming from Minho as he thrusts… each one of them makes him want more.

Minho looks, for lack of a better word, beautiful underneath him. Body hopelessly limp at his mercy and face contorted in pleasure, eyes shut. This man, who is so intent on keeping up his guard and never showing weakness, unraveling before his eyes.

Jisung lets go of Minho’s hips, leaning forward onto his hands so he can get closer to that mesmerizing face, usually so unwilling but now so malleable in his hands. As he does so, Minho grabs his arms, and Jisung feels nails dig into his flesh, then Minho opens his eyes. It’s magnetizing, the look in Minho’s eyes, so desperate and intense. Jisung wouldn’t be able to look away even if he wanted to.

It’s with another hard thrust and their eyes locked, that Minho lets out his loudest moan before his eyes roll to the back of his head. Relentlessly, Jisung chases his own release to the sound of Minho’s staggered moans.

It’s explosive and overwhelming, and it’s all of Jisung’s energy being drained at once when he comes. He falls down onto his elbows with his eyes closed, doing his best not to collapse on top of Minho, his breathing not able to keep up with the demand.

He can feel Minho’s warm breath against his lips, steadily slowing down with his own.

Then, feeling lightheaded and blissed out, Jisung kisses him. With his lips, he lets Minho know that he did so well, taking him so good.

Minho hums into the kiss, his fingers digging into Jisung’s arms again, and it makes Jisung never want to stop. But then he feels out of breath again and has to pull back.

It’s instant how the post-orgasm haze lifts when he looks down at Minho, who looks—

Shocked?

Jisung’s cheeks heat up, and he swallows.

Why is he suddenly the one feeling embarrassed in all of this? It was just a kiss. Nothing unusual about a kiss. They’ve done that plenty of times before.

Still, he rather hurriedly lets Minho’s legs down so he can pull out.

Without being told, he automatically reaches for the nightstand and pulls out tissues from the top drawer. He doesn’t look at Minho when he hands him a few of the tissues before cleaning himself up.

“Hand me a few, Jisungie?”

Jisung whips his head around. Felix. Felix is here. Sitting on the chair with a cum-stained hand around his flaccid cock.

Jisung swiftly gets up, closing the short distance between them, and cups Felix’s face, bending down to kiss him.

A calmness that is very different from any post-orgasm bliss spreads throughout his body as Felix reciprocates the kiss, his lips answering every plea. This. This is the one he wants to kiss.

“Thank you,” Felix says softly when they part again, looking up at Jisung fondly. It makes Jisung’s body feel like it’s made of pudding. Like he could be scooped right up from the floor with a spoon. He pecks Felix once more on the lips and finally hands him the tissues he asked for, then goes to find his underwear.

“Thank you, hyung” Jisung hears Felix say quietly behind him a few moments later.

Jisung takes a look, and his body tenses up, feeling much less like pudding. Felix is straddling Minho on the edge of the bed and leans in to kiss him passionately, while Minho’s hands grab Felix’s ass tightly, pulling him closer into his lap.

Jisung closes his eyes, shaking his head. Will he ever get used to it? He lets out a quiet sigh and then grabs his shirt from the floor, taking far longer than needed pulling it on.

“I’m gonna go to the bathroom. Do you want to continue the movie after?” Felix asks, but out of the corner of his eye, Jisung can see that he’s still in Minho’s lap.

“Whatever you want, Lixie,” Minho says.

“Hyung, grab me my phone, please.”

They are back on Minho’s bed, watching the movie they barely started before Minho unexpectedly interrupted it.

Jisung jumps when a moment later there’s a loud gasp from beside him, and Felix sits up with a jolt, phone in hand, staring at it wide-eyed.

“What’s wrong?” Minho asks, immediately worried.

“Remember that volunteer trip I was interested in but was already full when I contacted them? Someone just canceled, and I’m next on the list if I still want to go!”

“That’s amazing!” Jisung exclaims, genuinely happy about the news. He remembers it. About a month ago, Felix read excitedly about doing volunteer work through the university. Jisung had considered it for a moment, thinking about going with Felix, but he isn’t an extroverted humanitarian like Felix, and then it turned out to be too late anyway.

“When are you leaving?” Minho asks.

“Sunday morning. I just gotta pay for the name change on the plane tickets, and it’s all good!” Felix beams, but then his expression is quickly replaced with dread. “Oh my god, I gotta start packing! If I had known, then I would’ve brought my green jacket from home… but it’ll be fine, right? I can’t believe this is happening!”

They leave for their dorm after that, Felix incapable of sitting still and watching a movie when he’s got packing to do, even though he has a full day tomorrow to get it all done. He even ends up doing some laundry, running frantically around as he tries to decide what to bring. Jisung doesn’t love the idea of being without Felix for three weeks, but watching Felix be as excited as he is, it’s hard to be too sad about it.

Jisung brushes a strand of hair behind Felix’s ear, eyes locked as they lie side by side in his bed. It’s just the two of them tonight before Felix leaves tomorrow.

“Can I ask you something?” Jisung asks after going over it in his head once more.

“Of course,” Felix answers with a smile. “What’s on your mind?”

“How did you and Minho—” Jisung starts, but then pauses. He doesn’t continue, not really sure how, despite his decision to finally ask. Maybe Felix will get the rest of the sentence without further explanation. But when Felix stays silent, he clears his throat and tries again. “How did you two happen?”

Felix tilts his head on the pillow. “Happen? What— Oh, you mean, how did we get together?”

Jisung nods. “Yeah.”

He’d thought about it countless times, debating whether he really wanted to know or not, but since they seem to have become an actual thing, the three of them, it only felt right to ask at some point. That point being now.

“If you want to tell me. It’s okay if you don’t!” Jisung hurriedly adds.

Felix looks up at the ceiling, face deep in concentration, and Jisung thinks it might’ve been too personal a question despite everything that’s been happening as of late, but then he turns to Jisung again. “Remember when I told you I got jealous of the cats? I think that’s when it all started for me.”

“Oh, that’s—” Young, Jisung wants to say, but Felix shakes his head as if he knows what he’s thinking.

“Nothing happened. But for all those years, I couldn’t quite shake the jealousy whenever hyung gave them too much attention. Even though, I got used to them and love them too! Then hyung got accepted into college, and soon he would be leaving me completely. Then one night, I just kissed him,” Felix says and lifts a shoulder. “I don’t even think I knew that that was something I wanted to do. But hyung stopped it, and next morning, we both acted like it never happened. A few weeks later, he went off to college.”

“So, nothing until he was at college?” Jisung asks, not sure whether he's surprised that it's such a recent development or not.

“No. I mean, it's not exactly normal, right?” Felix chuckles. “But him going away didn’t help me at all. It only made me think about it more. What it would be like.”

Jisung nods. That makes sense. Sort of.

“Since hyung and I were so close, I’d come to every party I could and visit whenever it fit. I still tried to forget about all these weird new feelings, tried to convince myself whatever I was feeling wasn’t real, but then at one party, I noticed something different in hyung. The way he would sometimes look at me from across the room whenever I got a little too close to the other guys here. And I knew for sure this wasn't just in my head! I know him better than anyone. But nothing changed, he never told me what he was thinking. But sometimes…” Felix pauses, twisting his mouth as if it’s not that easy to say. “I know I made it hard for him, but I swear it was driving me insane! So sometimes when we’d cuddle after yet another party, a little too drunk for me to hold back, I’d try to get closer… Of course, hyung never let me. Not even once did he let me cross any lines. ‘Good night, Lixie’ was the usual response and stopping any hands from wandering, just cuddling me instead. He never kicked me out of his bed, but it was clear what he meant.”

Again, Jisung doesn't know if he should be surprised or not. It was all Felix. And Minho did everything to keep his hands to himself. But ultimately he failed. Jisung knows the ending to the story.

“I know people wondered about us at times. He just introduced me as his dongsaeng, and that was it. Hyung never cared to clear up whatever rumors he heard. One day, before starting his second year, I finally confronted him. Told him I knew what was on his mind, and that it was on my mind too. When we finally—” Felix pauses again, shaking his head. “It was like nothing had ever made more sense. We were already so close, but now we were closer. As close as possible in every way. Hyung said it could never happen again. But it did. And it kept happening, every time I visited him here. And eventually, he accepted that that was our new normal. Stopped trying to resist it. Until a long summer without so much as a kiss since we were back home. It was excruciating at times, but then I knew we'd be at college together soon, and we'd have so much more time together. It would be worth the wait.” Felix smiles, but then with a deep sigh he rolls onto his back, staring at the ceiling. “But then suddenly he said he didn’t want to anymore.”

It gets very quiet in the room after that, and Jisung wants to ask more, but Felix’s eyes glaze over, wet glistening in the light.

“I didn’t believe him at first,” Felix unexpectedly continues. ”But we were right back to how everything was before. It hurt. A lot. But I had been patient before, so I knew I could be patient again. And then I got to know you.” He turns to Jisung again, back to smiling, looking so different from just seconds ago. He brings a hand up to Jisung’s cheek. ”And you turned out to be something I didn’t expect at all.”

Jisung feels the warmth from the hand on his cheek spread throughout his body at Felix’s words. Felix turned out to be something he didn’t expect either.

“And then I realized that the two of you had something going on, and now here we are!” Felix cheerily finishes off.

Jisung hums affirmatively as a thought catches him. Minho really did find a “replacement” for Felix in him, just like he’d told him. A distraction. What an insane coincidence that he turned out to be Felix’s roommate.

“I know, it's still all very weird,” Felix says when Jisung has been quiet for too long.

“No, it's no—” Jisung begins, but then changes his mind. “I mean, yeah, it is, but it's not as weird as I thought. Somehow.” He furrows his eyebrows, thinking over his own words, and Felix giggles.

Then Felix’s face turns serious, staring deeply into Jisung’s eyes. “Well, I’m very happy you're still here,” he says, gently.

“Me too.”

Felix leans in, catching Jisung's lips with his own. Jisung sighs into the kiss, letting it overtake him and remove any other thoughts aside from how Felix makes him feel. Which is far more than he ever thought possible for one single person.

“I’m gonna miss you so much,” Jisung breathes, brushing the tips of their noses together.

“I’m gonna miss you too,” Felix says. “Take care of each other while I’m gone, yeah? No fighting!” He chuckles after the last addition, and Jisung wonders just how serious he’s being.

No fighting. How about nothing at all? He might miss Felix, but three weeks without Minho? Without feeling like his very existence is a nuisance?

Jisung can hardly wait.

Minho parks the car on the curb. He’s clearly at the right address.

He looks out the window at the house on the other side of the street, where loud music blasts from inside, and smiles. He won’t need to go inside, because there, sitting on the front steps of the house, is who he’s there for, curled into a ball, arms wrapped tight around his knees.

He steps out of the car, and when the car door slams shut, it makes the ball unfurl.

Felix swiftly lifts his head and the biggest, shiniest eyes look at Minho. He jumps up to meet Minho halfway in the middle of the deserted street, almost falling as he stumbles forward in a hurry, but Minho catches him in his arms. The scent of alcohol hits Minho’s nose, but that doesn’t bother him.

“Thank you for picking me up, hyung,” Felix mumbles, burying his nose in the crook of Minho’s neck.

“Always, Lixie,” Minho answers softly, giving him a squeeze. “Let’s get you home.”

He moves to let go of Felix so he can open the door to the passenger seat, but Felix clings to him tightly with no indication of wanting to let go. While supporting a swaying Felix, Minho manages to open the car door somehow, but it takes a lot of convincing to make Felix let go of him and get inside the car. Not taking any chances, he makes sure Felix’s seatbelt is fastened before getting in behind the wheel.

Felix is quiet during the drive, probably already half asleep after drinking, even though it isn’t that late yet.

They arrive at their house, where thankfully no one else is home, and Minho helps Felix up the stairs to his room, seating him on the bed.

“I’m gonna get you some water,” Minho says once he’s confident that Felix won’t fall over as soon as he lets go. Felix hums in reply and Minho leaves, but is quickly back again with a glass of water. He makes him drink half of it, before putting it on the bedside table.

“Hyung…” Felix quietly utters, and when Minho looks at him, he sees tears in his eyes.

“What’s going on?” Minho asks, worried, and sits down on the edge of the bed beside Felix.

“I really tried, hyung.” Felix looks down, fidgeting with his hands, and Minho instinctively takes one of them, squeezing it.

“Tried what?”

“Tried to make friends like you said, but— I don’t need anyone else when I got you,” Felix says, calmly, but then he lifts his head and a tear trickles down his cheek. “Why did you have to choose a college so far away?”

Minho’s heart breaks a little. “You know why,” he answers and wipes away the tear with his thumb.

“I officially hate soccer,” Felix declares with a pout, and it’s so endearing, that despite the teary eyes looking at him, Minho can’t help but smile a little.

He pulls Felix into a hug, holding him tight.

“I’m gonna be miserable without you, hyung,” Felix sniffles.

“You’ll come visit me all the time, yeah?” Minho says and ruffles Felix’s hair. “Unless you hate soccer so much you won’t come see me play.” His playful comment doesn’t have the intended effect, because Felix starts sobbing into his neck.

“Of course, I’ll c-come!” Felix stammers in between sobs. “I’m gonna miss you so, so much.”

Minho exhales deeply. “I’ll miss you too, Lixie.”

Just then there’s a loud thump, and Felix swiftly straightens up, startled.

Minho looks down at the floor in front of them, where a large orange and white cat just landed. He automatically leans forward, reaching out a hand to scratch the cat behind its ear. “Hi, Soon.”

Soonie accepts a few scratches, then considers the job done and leaves Felix’s room.

“Hyung,” Felix says, and Minho turns to him again. He isn’t crying anymore, but his eyes are still wet and laced with sadness.

“Yes?”

“Who do you love more? Me, or Soon, Doong, Dori?”

Minho gives him a perplexed look. “How is that even a question?”

Felix looks away, fidgeting with his hands in his lap again. “You always give them so much attention. Even when I’m around,” he says quietly. He sniffles and a wet drop lands on one of his hands. “Sometimes, I miss when it was just you and me, and now you’re leaving soon, and I got drunk, and I promise I really tried, hyung, but—”

Minho cups Felix’s face, making him look at him again. “Oh, Lixie, I’m so sorry,” Minho says and caresses Felix’s cheek that’s getting wet again. “You’re always my number one. No one could ever replace you. I’m so sorry I made you doubt that.”

Felix sniffles again, blinking. “You promise?”

Minho bumps their foreheads together, leaning against each other like so many times before. “I promise.”

Felix's breath hitches, and then Minho feels him relax into the touch. They sit in silence for a moment before Minho pulls back and brushes a strand of Felix’s hair behind his ear.

“I love you, Lixie.”

It happens before Minho gets the chance to react, Felix leaning in, doing something he’s never done before.

Felix’s lips touch his own, and Minho is too startled to move, but then his lips respond as if they’ve already done this many times before. Felix’s lips are impossibly soft, the kind Minho could never get enough of. He might as well be dreaming. But then Felix’s lips part, the tip of his tongue brushing against Minho’s, and the taste and smell of alcohol hit him like an ice-cold shower.

Felix is drunk.

More so, Felix is Felix.

This is not supposed to happen. Ever. Drunk or not.

Minho jumps to his feet without warning, startling Felix again.

“You should sleep,” Minho says, looking down at Felix, who really does look like someone who should be asleep, blinking up at him tiredly. “I’ll fill up your glass.”

Minho picks up the half-empty glass and hurries to the bathroom.

He shakes his head as he fills up the glass in the sink, trying to ignore what just happened, but his pulse rises and panic threatens to set in.

That was wrong on so many levels.

It wasn’t his fault, though!

Water douses his hand as the glass can’t hold more. He quickly puts it to the side, splashing his face with the cold water instead. Water drips down his face as he looks at himself in the mirror.

It wasn’t his fault.

And Felix is obviously too drunk to understand his own actions and acted without thinking, caught in the moment. He won’t even remember it tomorrow, and everything will be exactly as it was.

Minho takes a deep breath. He did nothing wrong. He stopped it.

He grabs a towel, dabbing his face dry, ready to calmly return to Felix’s room. He can’t keep the panic completely at bay, but when he sees Felix lying under the covers, looking peacefully asleep, he lets out a deep exhale.

Carefully, he puts the glass down on the bedside table along with a pair of painkillers. He turns off the light and is ready to sneak out again when Felix stirs.

“Hyung,” Felix whispers. “I don’t want to be alone. Will you stay?”

Minho smiles softly. “Of course, Lixie.”

He doesn’t hesitate to get in beside Felix, who immediately finds comfort in his embrace.

Minho’s heart is full and warm.

This is who they are. And who they always will be.

“It’s your birthday soon,” Minho says and throws another pair of socks into his bag. It’s already pretty full, getting ready for his second year at college already. “Are you still planning on coming?”

“Of course I am!” Felix says brightly, sitting down on Minho’s bed. “Can’t ruin our tradition. I’ll come the day before so we can spend the whole day together.”

“You know, I’ve still got classes,” Minho reminds him as he picks up a shirt hanging on his desk chair, examining it, trying to decide whether to bring it or not.

“It’s okay! I’ll find something to do while waiting for you. Maybe some of the other guys in the frat are free to hang, now that you are moving in there.”

“Or you could join a lecture,” Minho says with a laugh and throws the shirt in the hamper.

“Maybe I will!” Felix says with confidence.

Minho shakes his head at Felix’s enthusiasm and walks over, plopping down beside him on the bed, bumping their shoulders together. “Please don’t make yourself suffer at the hands of college lectures until you have to. Live your carefree life for as long as you can,” Minho says, and then drapes an arm around Felix’s shoulders, squeezing him a little. “What do you want for your birthday? Any wishes?”

“Only one,” Felix says quietly.

“Hm?” Minho lets go of Felix and pulls a knee up on the bed, turning to look curiously at Felix.

Felix looks at Minho’s knee, and with his index finger, he starts drawing small tickling circles on it. “I—” Felix immediately pauses, and Minho notices that he seems to be blushing.

“Tell me. I’ll give you anything,” Minho encourages him. “But I can’t if you don’t tell me first.”

Felix lifts his head, his big innocent eyes staring right into Minho’s. Then Minho feels the circles come to a halt, and, instead, fingers slide slowly to his thigh. “You know what I want, hyung.”

“Felix…” Minho sighs and stops the wandering fingers by wrapping his hand around them softly.

But then Felix intertwines their fingers, snaring Minho, and looks deep into his eyes as he says, “I know you want it, too, hyung.”

Inside, Minho’s stomach flips at the accusation, but on the outside, he shakes his head. “I don’t—”

“Don’t deny it,” Felix interrupts him before he can do exactly that. “I’ve seen the way you look at me when the other guys get too close.”

“You know that's not an option,” Minho says calmly. Why didn’t he just deny it?

“You said anything,” Felix says and pulls his hand free, bringing it up to caress Minho’s cheek instead. “And I don’t want anything else.”

Again, Minho catches Felix’s hand in his, pulling it down. “Try and think of something else. You’ve got time.” Minho smiles, trying his best to look like none of this fazes him at all. Like it isn’t something that has crossed his mind many times before. But he can’t give Felix that. Not this birthday or any other.

“Fine, I’ll think about it,” Felix says and gets up. He goes to open the door and looks back at Minho one more time. “If you’ll think about it too.”

Minho doesn’t reply, and Felix says nothing more before leaving the room.

“It’s almost midnight.”

Felix pauses the movie and lifts his head from Minho’s chest. Like so many times before, they are cuddled up in Minho’s bed, but now in his new room at the frat house.

“It is?” Minho says as if he hasn’t already glanced at the clock several times while watching the movie. Of course, he’ll be ready to wish Felix “Happy Birthday” the second it happens.

Felix rolls onto his side, facing Minho from beside him. “Have you thought about my present?”

Minho’s stomach turns uncomfortably. Felix shouldn’t be asking him this. He shouldn’t even be thinking it. But it was too much to hope that he’d forgotten about it.

Minho sits up, shaking his head with his back to Felix. “You don’t know what you are asking.”

“But I do know,” Felix says gently, and Minho feels a hand on his shoulder. “And I know what I want.”

Minho shakes his head again. It makes no sense that Felix is saying these things. Why is he saying these things?

“And in just a few minutes I’ll be twenty. I’m not some dumb teenager anymore, hyung,” Felix says and slides his hand down Minho's arm. “I know what I feel.”

Then Felix moves in front of him, sitting on his heels, and places his warm hand on Minho’s chest. Underneath it, Minho feels his heart pound loudly.

“I know you feel it too, hyung. What you have been feeling for so long.”

Minho immediately tenses up at Felix’s words. The call-out. The implication that he—

“No,” Minho says firmly and turns away, making Felix’s hand drop from his chest.

“No, what?” Felix asks, still softly, from behind him. Minho exhales harshly through his nose. Does he really have to spell it out? Does he really have to explain why—

“No, we can’t, Felix!” Minho half yells as he turns to face Felix again, throwing his hands in the air in frustration. “We’re brothers, for fuck’s sake!”

It should be reason enough, but why couldn’t he just tell Felix that he doesn’t think of him like that? Why couldn’t he just deny everything Felix thinks is true?

“But what if we weren’t?” Felix asks, reaching a hand up to cup one of Minho’s cheeks, and Minho lets him. Despite it all, Felix's touch still calms him. “What if for one night we just pretend what we both wish was true.”

“We can’t just pretend…” Minho feels weak when he says it. Defeated. He can’t just pretend. Even though the one thing he’s been good at this past year was to pretend. Pretend that he hasn’t thought about the night Felix kissed him. What if he’s tired of pretending?

Felix leans closer, and Minho’s breath hitches. He needs to move, back away, but instead, he just closes his eyes. Then he feels something brush against his lips, feels warm breath on him as Felix whispers, “Why not?”

Minho stays still, afraid that he might betray himself if he dares do anything at all.

He prepares himself for what Felix might be about to do, but then suddenly the hands disappear, leaving his cheeks naked, and he no longer feels warm breath on his face. Minho opens his eyes.

“This is the last time I’ll ask you,” Felix says, sitting back down on his heels. “If you still don’t want me at midnight, I promise I’ll respect your decision and never bring it up again.”

Minho nods. He knows that Felix means it.

He stares blankly at Felix, his thoughts all over the place, but he just has to hold out until past midnight, and this will all be over. Just a few more minutes.

Felix moves around, then holds up his phone, showing the time. “11:59.”

Minho’s stomach flips. Any second now, it’ll be Felix’s birthday.

It feels like he’s burning up with the way his pulse starts racing. He isn’t going to do this. He is going to hold out, let the clock hit midnight, and not do anything. Show Felix once and for all that, this is never going to happen. It can’t.

Then the numbers change. Four zeros staring back at him.

Minho immediately tenses up, his hands folding into tight fists, but he forces himself to look Felix in the eyes. He has to if he wants to convince him that this is his final decision.

Felix’s expression is calm, but Minho knows better than to trust that. He knows Felix better than anyone. Beneath all of that calmness, just patiently waiting, Minho knows that Felix is anything but calm. Just like Minho himself.

Normally he would have called Felix out right away, made him tell him what’s wrong so he could comfort him and make him feel better, but tonight it’s all because of him.

Because Felix wants him. And has wanted him for a while now.

On some level, Minho knew. Even though he tried to convince himself otherwise.

For the past year, every time Felix visited him, joining him at parties, he’d been messing with his head. Dancing too close to some of the guys, so much so that Minho had to resist the urge to push them away. Instead, he made it clear that Felix was off-limits in more subtle ways. Like the right kind of scowl when Felix wasn’t looking.

At night, he would cuddle Felix, like nothing had changed, like he wasn’t fazed by any of it. But Felix didn’t make it easy. Not at all. Especially drunk Felix would get a little too daring at times, fingers wandering too softly. Too close.

But Minho would ignore it every single time. Because that couldn’t happen, and it didn’t mean anything. Felix didn't mean it like that.

Except now Felix is here, right in front of him, making it clear as day that he meant it every time. That he wants him, and is just waiting for him to make a move. And Minho can’t lie to himself anymore.

It feels like that one minute drags on forever, midnight frozen in time, but then finally one of the zeros changes: 00:01.

Felix puts his phone down and gives Minho a careful smile. A smile that Minho knows masks disappointment and sadness.

“Let’s continue the movie, hyung.” Felix turns away, looking around the bed.

Minho is aware that he hasn’t moved at all for several minutes now, keeping himself in check until he could breathe safely again. But he still can’t.

Just tonight.

“Hyung, do you see the remo—“

In an instant, Minho is up on his knees, one hand grabbing around the back of Felix’s neck, and then he kisses him. Pushing their lips together in a way he hasn’t allowed himself to even think about.

Felix is tense for a second, caught off guard, but then Minho feels hands pull him in closer, clutching the fabric of his shirt, and Felix kisses him back as if it’s the most natural thing in the world. As if it’s something they’ve done a million times before. Maybe they have in Felix’s mind.

Minho hums needily into the kiss, into Felix’s lips that are so soft, Minho doesn’t know how he’ll ever get enough.

Then Felix licks into Minho's mouth, tickling his tongue, and Minho feels himself fill up below just at that. He buries his hands in Felix's hair and pushes their tongues together, licking and tasting, feeling so addicted already.

It's dangerous. Now that they’ve begun, Minho can’t imagine ever stopping.

But then Felix’s hands move up under his shirt, sliding across his back, touching him in a way he shouldn’t. It’s all wrong. So, so wrong. But how can something so wrong feel so good? Minho wants it so much. And Felix…

“What do you want?” Minho says, forcing them to a halt. He pulls back a little, enough so he can look Felix in the eyes. Minho’s breathing is harsh, out of breath, but all he wants is to reconnect with those lips in front of him. He doesn’t need air if he has Felix. Still, no matter what Felix has already said, he needs to make sure.

Felix gives him a confused look, and panic instantly arises inside Minho, his eyes desperately searching Felix’s face for signs that he didn’t do something wrong after all.

With a sigh, Felix’s expression turns soft, a slight smile forming on his lips as he cups Minho’s face. Felix kisses him softly on the lips once, and his thumbs brush firmly over Minho’s cheeks, holding him tight as he says, “Everything.”

Minho hears the single word from Felix’s mouth, and he’s never wanted anything or anyone more his whole life.

Minho crashes their lips together again, and they fall over, Minho half on top of Felix. With no need to hold back anymore, he hurriedly pulls off Felix’s shirt and then his own, letting skin press against skin, as they connect again.

He slides a hand down the side of Felix’s upper body, taking in all of his curves and dents in a way he's never been able to before, until they reach denim, where Felix’s jeans begin. Minho hesitates for a moment, but then carefully, he slides his hand to Felix’s inner thigh. Felix lets out a high-pitched gasp.

“Tell me to stop if you need me to,” Minho whispers, keeping his hand still.

“Yes,” Felix breathes and bucks his hips, urging Minho’s hand to continue. “But I won’t. Don’t ever want you to stop, hyung.” Minho feels dizzy.

He keeps eye contact as he slides his hand up the side of his crotch, barely touching Felix where he knows he wants him to. The low whine that escapes Felix sounds sinful to Minho’s ears. It’s insane. He isn’t supposed to hear sounds like that from Felix, but his whole body aches to hear more.

His hand brushes over the sensitive skin of Felix’s stomach and slowly his fingers make it to the button of the jeans, easily flicking them open. Felix is looking at him with so much anticipation, waiting for Minho to do whatever he wants.

Felix was right. Minho has wanted this all along. Even if he’s never really let himself think about it, too used to distracting himself with something else whenever those thoughts would appear. Those sinful, sinful thoughts. So now Minho doesn’t want to rush. Not when he’s finally allowed himself to think all of those thoughts fully. And as far as he knows, he is the most experienced one out of the two of them, and he isn’t going to take that for granted either.

Forgetting about the jeans for a moment, Minho gets on his hands and knees, hovering above Felix. He leans down, kissing Felix again, who digs his fingers into Minho’s back, trying to pull him closer, but Minho has other plans.

He doesn’t stay by Felix’s lips for long, but instead makes a trail of kisses over his cheek, to his jawline, and to his neck.

“Hyung...” Felix moans at the soft touch, and Minho can feel Felix’s racing pulse on his neck against his lips. He knows that Felix is eager. He’s waited for this. Minho wonders for how long exactly, while his lips continue their soft trail down his upper body. Was it even before the drunken kiss?

Slowly, he moves all the way down until he is low enough to brush the tip of his nose over Felix’s belly button.

Felix is breathing heavily, his stomach moving rapidly right under Minho’s lips with every breath. He catches Felix's eyes, and too tempted not to, Minho does a quick lick right under his belly button. Felix squirms and lets out a whine at the wet touch, and Minho’s hold body responds, reminding him just how whipped he is for the other, even though he is the one currently in control.

Finally, he zips open the jeans and starts wiggling them off of Felix, who eagerly lifts his hips to make it easier. Moving back off the bed, Minho pulls them all off, throwing them to the floor.

He quickly gets on the bed again, his hands feeling up Felix’s legs as he gets in between them, trailing kisses along his left inner thigh, and every squirm and gasp from Felix as he moves higher up, makes his desire burn deeper.

When he reaches Felix’s underwear, he looks up at him again. He wants to ask Felix if he’s sure of this again, that he truly wants this, but Felix already said so, and the way Felix is looking at him tells him all he needs to know.

He brushes the tip of his nose up along the outline of Felix’s hard cock and feels it twitch. Minho has to close his eyes.

“Hyung,” Felix whines. “Please.”

Felix’s voice hits Minho hard. Like it was made just to lure him in, his own personal temptation, pulling him into a place with no exit sign. How could he ever not give Felix whatever he wants?

Minho’s heart is pounding out of his chest as his fingers find the hem of Felix’s underwear. He curls his fingers and carefully pulls down the fabric. Minho’s heart skips a beat, as Felix’s cock springs free, fully hard and with the tip glistening.

Sinful.

Looking at Felix naked in front of him is so, so sinful.

But Minho keeps going, pulling the underwear all the way off, and takes a moment to take in the full sight of Felix naked on his bed.

The little voice at the back of his head that keeps telling him how wrong this is—and that he should stop!—is still there, but it’s hard to care when Felix is so, so beautiful. And all for him.

Felix gives him an enticing look, one that makes Minho question whether this is really happening. He stares as if hypnotized as Felix moves his hand down his own upper body, his gaze intense and directed at him. He slides it all the way down and grabs his cock, pumping himself slowly with a low moan, biting his bottom lip.

Minho shakes his head in disbelief. His sweet and innocent Felix looks so far from innocent.

“Hyung,” Felix says, letting go of his cock. He then pulls his knees up high and brushes a finger over his exposed asshole. “I played with myself earlier today.”

Minho all but chokes.

“You did?” Minho asks, raising an eyebrow. He gets on the bed again, and Felix hooks both of his hands under his knees, pulling them even further apart.

Minho can see everything, absolutely nothing is hidden from him anymore. He can see the faint trace of something having been there earlier, a slight redness and a pucker. He brushes a finger across it but quickly pulls it back, watching the hole contract as Felix lets out a gasp in response.

He really shouldn’t let Felix wait too long.

He wets two of his fingers with spit and spreads it around Felix’s hole. Carefully, he dips the tip of one finger inside, and watches pink pulse around it. All for him. Insane.

He dives down, licking alongside the finger, gathering enough saliva to push the finger in deeper, and Felix whimpers beautifully.

“Did you think of me?” Minho asks, feeling lightheaded as the thought appears. He straightens up so he can look at Felix, who looks more desperate than ever.

So fucking sinful.

“I always think of you, hyung,” Felix breathes, unashamed. “Think of you fucking me.”

Fuck.

All thoughts of taking his time are steadily going out the window.

Minho pulls out the finger and gets up, quickly searching the drawers of his nightstand to grab lube and a condom. Back between Felix’s legs, he douses his fingers with lube.

Felix gasps when Minho touches him with the cold liquid and while looking Felix in the eyes, he pushes the finger fully inside.

It’s apparent that Felix played with himself with how easy the glide is, and Minho soon adds another finger. Felix pushes his head back into the mattress and moans.

Never did Minho expect to be in this position. He never should have, but now that he is, it feels addicting.

A third finger, and it’s still a fairly easy glide. What has Felix been playing with? Obviously not only his fingers because they both have small hands. But Felix has been thinking of him. Fucking him.

The reminder of that, makes his fingers move faster. Pushing in the lube and pulling some of it out again, all to the sound of Felix’s low moans.

Minho grabs Felix’s cock with his other hand and starts stroking him, but Felix freezes and looks up at him with wide eyes.

“Hyung, don’t!” Felix shakes his head anxiously. “Don’t want to come yet.”

God, he’s adorable. No wonder, Minho wants all of him.

Minho removes both of his hands and instead crawls forward to push his lips against Felix’s again. Fuck, he wants him so, so bad. Not just because of his own unbelievably hard cock straining against the fabric of his pants, but his heart, his soul. All of him wants all of Felix.

No one could ever compare. No one could ever understand him like Felix does.

“My Lixie,” Minho whispers as his nose tip brushes over Felix’s affectionately. “So perfect.”

“Hyung, I’m ready,” Felix breathes and slides his hands down Minho’s upper body until they reach his jeans, fumbling to open them. “Take them off already.”

Minho quickly pulls back and gets up to undress himself completely, letting his cock spring free with a moan of relief. On the bed, Felix is looking up at him with bright lights in his eyes, biting his bottom lip, and swallowing deep enough for Minho to clearly see his Adam’s apple move with it.

It feels like an electric current is running through Minho’s body, every fiber of him charged with anticipation. He’s ready for this, too.

He hurriedly picks up the condom, ripping it open, when he’s interrupted.

“Hyung,” Felix says, staring at him with his big innocent eyes, and glances at the condom in his hand. “Do you have to?”

Minho’s stomach flips at the possibility. He’s clean, and surely Felix wouldn’t suggest not using a condom if he wasn’t as well?

“Have you—?” Been tested, is the rest of the sentence, but Felix is shaking his head profusely before Minho can finish.

“Saved myself for you, hyung.”

Minho feels breathless, his knees about to buckle underneath him. There are not enough words in the world to express how that information makes him feel. He had no idea.

Without further question, Minho throws the condom to the floor and picks up the lube instead, hurriedly covering his cock in the liquid. It's a relief touching himself, so needy and on edge.

With bated breath, he lines himself up with Felix’s waiting asshole and brushes his tip across it. His insides are on fire.

He makes eye contact with Felix, who eagerly nods with his bottom lip between his teeth again. His eyes are full of anticipation but looking equally as nervous.

Minho nods back and switches his focus downward again. With one hand on Felix's asscheek and the other firmly around himself, he makes the first gentle push. He knows it won’t be enough, but it's enough to make Felix whimper.

“Breathe,” Minho says, sliding a soothing hand up Felix’s thigh. Felix nods and forces out a deep exhale. It does the trick. Minho's eyes widen in shock as the head of his cock is swallowed, a loud gasp escaping both of them.

He's inside Felix.

Sinful, sinful, sinful.

But there is no going back now. They both want this too much.

Slowly, Minho pushes deeper, until all of him is fully encased in Felix’s warmth.

He holds still, his eyes on the beautiful mess underneath him, panting with his mouth open. Minho can hardly believe what he’s looking at.

He leans down, catching Felix’s lips for a moment. “Are you okay?”

Felix nods. “Yes,” he replies. “Want you so bad, hyung.”

How is he real?

“I love you,” Minho whispers, leaning his forehead against the other’s, closing his eyes.

Feeling Felix like this is everything he could ever dream of and more. Connected, deeper than ever. Deeper than they ever will be again. Just for tonight, they are each other’s. In every possible way.

“I love you too, hyung.”

They meet in another kiss, and then Felix nods up at Minho again. Minho finally moves, slowly pulling out and pushing in to let Felix get used to the feeling, only able to contain himself with the other’s comfort in mind.

“Hyung,” Felix breathes not long after. “Need more.”

It’s all Minho needed to hear.

Minho thrusts for real this time, making Felix gasp as his whole body is shaken. But Felix doesn’t tell him to slow down or stop, so Minho keeps going, giving Felix more, just like he asked for.

He listens to the many sounds coming from Felix, looks at the way his face distorts with every thrust, feels his nails dig eagerly into his back, dragging down his skin, possibly leaving marks that will remind Minho of this for days. Minho hopes they will.

Their pulses are competing, who can go faster, hearts beating out of their chests as they try to keep up with the demand.

“H-hyung…” Felix whines, the sweetest sound Minho’s ears will ever hear, he’s sure.

He picks up the pace again, pulling out more to make the thrusts longer, pushing harder.

Felix’s moans get more intense and when Minho straightens up to bend Felix further, the new angle has him sounding loud and clear, probably loud enough for anyone on the other side of the wall to hear, but Minho can’t make himself care. His mind is focused on only one thing. Felix. And how he can draw more of those moans from him.

The only thing that kept Minho from coming the moment he entered Felix was his focus on the other, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore how close he’s getting himself, feeling increasingly more desperate. Greedier.

Felix starts shaking, his eyes closed now, unable to keep them open anymore.

“Hyung, hyung, hyung,” he repeatedly whimpers. “I’m—”

Felix splurts onto his stomach, coming hard despite the lack of attention his cock has gotten. It’s the most dizzying thing Minho has ever experienced. With a breathy “Lixie” leaving his lips, he lets himself go too, filling Felix up, reveling in the feeling of being linked far beyond what his imagination ever allowed him to.

They lock lips even though neither of them has enough air to do so for long, but it doesn’t matter. Minho is going to take every single thing he can, with or without breathing, because tomorrow, when they wake up, they will act like this has never happened.

Tonight is all they are gonna have.

Just tonight.

Never at home.

It was an unspoken rule between them. Anything physical was reserved for whenever Felix visited only. And now they were nearing the end of a long summer without crossing any boundaries, so unlike Minho’s whole last year at college. But soon he’d be back.

And this time, Felix would join him.

Minho finishes wiping the last cup, and Felix offers him a quick smile as he grabs it from him. He turns around gracefully, putting it back in the cupboard with the others.

Minho sighs.

He misses Felix. Misses being closer than close to him. And his body misses Felix’s body against his.

It’s been more than just a long summer.

But he’s made up his mind. He just needs Felix to understand. Eventually he will.

It’s not words he’s looking forward to saying, far from, but they have to be said, and tonight, all alone at home, is as good a time as any.

Minho swallows, watching Felix as he meticulously arranges the cups so the hanks all point in the same direction, and puts down the dish towel on the kitchen counter.

He just really needs Felix to understand…

“Next week, when I go back, when we go back,” Minho corrects himself. “Felix, we have to stop. We can’t start again. I don’t want to.” He quickly adds the last part. The most important part. Even if it feels like a lie.

"What?" Felix turns around, looking at him confused, with one of the cups still in his hand. “I’m not sure what you—”

“You know what I mean. Us two—” Minho turns away, closing his eyes. “It’s not right.”

“Hyung…”

The single word hurts more than it ever has. But this is it. “I’m sorry, but you can’t change my mind,” Minho says and turns to look Felix in the eye again. He knows he has to. “Not this time.”

The cup falls from Felix’s hand, breaking in half on the floor, but he just stares at Minho, looking lost for words.

Minho walks over and holds Felix on his upper arms, gently squeezing as he looks into his eyes. “I need you to do what you promised you would back then,” he starts. “I need you to respect my decision.”

“You can’t—” Felix shakes his head. “You won’t…” Then he suddenly steps back, pushing Minho’s hands away angrily. “What’s the point when we’ll both be at college together, hanging around all the time?”

“That’s exactly the point,” Minho pleads.

“You won’t be able to do this. Y-you’ll change your mind as soon as we’re there!”

“Lixie… I won’t. Please try and u—” Minho says as he steps forward, reaching out a hand, but Felix backs up again, and Minho stops.

“If you do this, don’t—” Felix’s eyes well up, and in no time tears start falling.

Minho wants to reach out again, hold him, but for now, he doesn’t. Felix has already backed up as far as he can in the small kitchen.

“But what exactly does this mean? I can’t touch you anymore?” Felix chokes out. “Can’t hug you?”

“Of course, you can,” Minho says, his heart breaking a little at the question. “You are still my Lixie. We’ll just go back to the way things were.”

“How do you expect me to just do that?” Felix cries and wipes his nose with the back of his hand.

“Please try. For me,” Minho says and then opens his arms. “Come here.”

With a loud sob, Felix falls forward into Minho’s arms, and Minho holds him as tight as he possibly can.

“Don’t leave me,” Felix says, clutching the fabric of Minho's shirt.

“I will never leave you. I promise.”

Jisung can’t believe that he actually wishes he was busy with lessons right now, but if he had classes to go to and homework to finish, he would spend less time just missing Felix. Or at least he’d be too distracted to do so. But alas, he’s still got almost three weeks of Felix-less vacation to fill out.

Today, he’s been looking forward to, though.

Because today, he’ll be doing one of the things he enjoys doing the most: making music.

Jisung grabs his padded jacket, practically skipping all the way down the stairs and out the building to where he’s meeting Changbin, ready to head to the frat house together.

Chan is finally back from his vacation with Seonghwa, and the three of them have put aside the whole day for them to just hole up in Chan’s room.

Way too excited and too busy talking to Changbin, it isn’t until they are by the front door to the frat, that something occurs to Jisung. He might run into Minho.

A little apprehensively, he enters behind Changbin without knocking, and they immediately head for the stairs.  Chan told them to just come up when they got there, and they nod to a couple of guys sitting in the living room as they pass them. Upstairs, the door to Minho’s room comes into view.

Jisung’s pulse rises, Changbin giving him a curious look when he doesn’t answer whatever question he didn’t hear. But then they quickly pass the door and reach Chan’s room. As soon as they are inside, Jisung exhales deeply, slumping against the wall.

“Hey, guys!” Chan greets them happily from his swivel chair, sitting in front of his impressive setup of music equipment on his desk. “What’s up with you?” Chan furrows his eyebrow, tilting his head at Jisung.

Out of the corner of his eye, Jisung sees Changbin lightly shake his head. “My guess? We probably don’t want to know.”

Changbin pats Jisung on the back with a chuckle, and leads him to the two empty chairs on either side of Chan.

Jisung realizes how silly he’s being. He’s got absolutely no reason to be nervous about bumping into Minho.

Minho, who he’s seen naked several times and most recently made whine pathetically on his cock. If anything, Minho should be nervous about bumping into him. But knowing Minho, he’s not. To Minho, Jisung is just Jisung. Someone he’s got to deal with because of Felix.

Jisung shakes his head then smiles. “I’m all good. Where do we start?”

He doesn’t volunteer to be the one to pick up their takeout when it arrives downstairs and is relieved when Changbin says he’ll do it, but Jisung is human, and humans have to go to the bathroom at some point.

He holds his breath as he sneaks out of Chan’s room after their late lunch, trying to make as little sound as possible as he gets to Minho’s door.

Jisung’s ears are on alert, but it’s almost eerily quiet as he passes the door that is still firmly closed. No sound at all.

He can't help but wonder what Minho is up to. Busy doing whatever Minho does when he’s alone.

He shouldn't care. And he doesn't! He's just so used to Minho always showing up when he wants it the least.

He quietly passes the door again on his way back from the bathroom, and again he’s in luck, as Minho’s door stays closed.

Soccer season hasn’t started yet. And Chan is on the team too, so that can’t be where Minho is.

Except Minho is definitely the type to start early on his own…

Jisung scoffs, shaking his head as he opens the door to Chan's room.

“Are you guys coming to the party Friday?” Chan asks when Jisung joins them again.

Changbin lights up. “There’s a party?”

“First one of the year here! Unless you count New Year's, which we don't.” Chan chuckles.

“We’ll be there!” Changbin says, before Jisung gets the chance to say anything at all.

“Oh, I’m not sure I—” Jisung starts, not really sure he feels like going to a party where it’s more than likely that Minho will be as well, but Changbin interrupts him.

“You got something better to do?” Changbin raises an eyebrow at him.

“I—” Jisung pauses. Of course, Changbin knows that Felix is away, they’ve been hanging out more than once these past few days in his absence. Jisung shrugs his shoulders and forces half a smile. “I guess not.”

“Great!” Chan says excitedly, clapping his hands together. “So, I actually had an idea… What if I sneak one of our tracks onto the playlist so we can see what people think?”

The day ends and Jisung returns to the dorm with a smile. It was a great day. The best really!

They worked on several tracks, coming up with completely new ideas, recording everything that came to mind. And Friday they'll give people a small taste of what they've been working on.

The more Jisung thinks about it, the more excited he gets by the idea. If all goes well, maybe someday they could try and perform some songs live.

And no Minho sightings today. Just like he hoped. No unpleasant stares or snide remarks now that Felix isn’t around.

He’s relieved, really. Not having seen Minho’s face. Not even for a second.

Jisung freezes, staring out the window at absolutely nothing at all as the relief suddenly feels a little less like relief, and like something much more unpleasant.

Annoyed at the thought of Minho. Annoyed that he’s even thinking of him.

Minho probably isn't thinking of him at all.

Two more days. It's been two more days without Felix.

Jisung sits down on his bed with a loud thump. He looks at the bed at the opposite side of the room and sighs. He misses Felix.

Felix has barely had the time to update him on how things are going.

He takes out his phone and goes to the camera roll where he’s already saved the few pictures Felix sent him, but he scrolls too far, and several pictures full of bright lights and a smiling sunshine appear.

He clicks on one, zooming in on said sunshine with his face full of the prettiest freckles, his skin lit up in the dark by the lights hanging on the branches of the weeping willow surrounding him.

Jisung swipes to the next one. And then the next. But each picture from the Winter Lights Festival only makes him miss Felix more. Miss that smile that goes all the way up to the eyes, turning them into crescents.

Then Minho appears, joining Felix under the tree.

Jisung's stomach churns.

That was the last day he saw Minho.

He quickly swipes to the next picture, but Minho is in that one too.

He zooms in on Felix, getting Minho out of frame. Felix’s eyes sparkle, but he’s looking to the side. Jisung knows why. He slides his finger across the screen until Minho appears.

Jisung inhales a staggered breath. Minho is looking up at the lights, his side profile with his clear-cut jaw and perfect nose all lit up. His eyes sparkle like Felix’s, making him look much younger and innocent-like. So different from the expression Jisung usually gets to see.

But now Jisung has seen nothing at all for almost a week.

Which is good. Obviously, that’s good.

He looks at the next picture, zooms in on Minho, and scoffs. It’s ridiculous. Minho is ridiculous. Everything about him, really. From his stupidly handsome face to his frustrating hot and cold personality.

Then he remembers the party tomorrow night. There's a very likely chance that he'll run into Minho.

Jisung turns off the screen, putting the phone down on the bed beside him.

He does not want to run into Minho. But again, he can't help but wonder what Minho is up to. How does he deal with Felix being so far away? Better than him?

The sound of his phone startles him, but it's the most welcome interruption of them all.

As if he knew he needed it, Felix is calling him.

Jisung hurriedly picks up the phone, answering the video call with a big smile. “Hi!”

“Hi, Jisungie!” Felix beams at him, and Jisung forgot just how much he missed that.

“How is everything?” he asks. “Are they treating you well?”

“Everyone is amazing!”

Felix starts telling him all about the volunteer work in detail, what it’s like and how kind all of the people he’s met are. Jisung happily listens, just smiling at the screen as Felix keeps on going.

“What about you? What have you been up to?”

“I’ve been working on some songs with Chan and Changbin. We might try and play one of them at the party tomorrow!” Jisung excitedly adds when he remembers.

“That sounds amazing! But now I’m sad I won’t be there. Promise to play it for me when I get back?”

“Definitely. A private session just for you.”

Felix giggles, then smiles sweetly. “I’m happy to know you’re not too bored now that hyung and I are both away.”

Jisung tilts his head. “Minho is away?”

“Yeah, he went on a trip with some of the guys.”

“Oh, cool…” Jisung nods slowly.

“I have something I need to confess by the way…” Felix trails off, looking bashful, and Jisung tilts his head again. “When you fucked hyung, I got a little bit jealous.”

Jisung blinks. “You wanted to top Minho?” There's no way Jisung sees Minho agreeing to that. Of all the things he knows Minho would willingly do for Felix…

Felix shakes his head. “No, I wanted you to fuck me instead.”

Jisung breaks into a wide smile. “Really? You got jealous of Minho?”

“I mean, it was definitely still ridiculously hot! I have no regrets getting to watch that. But yeah, I felt a little jealous,” Felix says, pouting cutely. “I miss you.”

Jisung's whole body warms up at those last words. “I miss you so much, you have no idea,” he admits, shaking his head. “But I'm so happy for you. It'll be worth it.”

Felix nods. “And I'll be back again before we know it. Right there in your arms.”

Jisung smiles again. “Right in my arms.”

Jisung is constantly vigilant when he arrives at the party.

Always on the lookout for Minho despite what Felix told him since he said nothing about when Minho would be back again. But then when there’s no sign of him after the first hour or so, Jisung decides that Minho still isn’t there, and with a few beers in, he finally manages to relax.

“Guys! We're next up!” Chan beams when he finds them after disappearing for a moment. He catches Changbin and Jisung under one arm each and leads them to the living room where the music is the loudest, and the most people are gathered.

Chan chose the song that best fit the vibe of the party, spending extra time to finish the production of it completely. He did an amazing job with it, as the current song seamlessly transitions into their song, blasting loud and clear through the speakers.

Jisung is nervous at first, awaiting the reaction of the people around them, but no one reacts to it much. People are too drunk and busy partying to care about an unknown song playing—that is until Changbin starts rapping along.

He spits fire, hitting the flow of the song like only the one having written it could. It's just amidst their little group of people gathered in the middle of the room, mostly showing off his skills to a swooning Hyunjin in front of him, but then people around them start noticing, and soon they are making room for him, Changbin rapping the best he ever has.

Jisung is in awe of Changbin's confidence, not sure if he could do the same, but then Changbin pulls him into the circle of people that has formed around him to get ready for their upcoming part where they switch back and forth between each other, one line taken by the next, and he doesn't have time to hesitate.

It's surprisingly easy once he's started, his rap flowing so effortlessly he quickly forgets about any nerves or lack of confidence. Chan hypes the crowd up even further when he takes the chorus, singing at the top of his lungs, putting emphasis on the right words to really grab all the attention and even getting some people to participate, yelling back at him.

When the song ends, there's a loud cheer and applause, and they take a humble bow while beaming. Chan, who knows more than just a few people there, has a steady stream of people patting him on the shoulders, praising all of them, and Chan surprisingly seems to be blushing a bit.

“That was amazing!” Jisung exclaims when the cheering has died down, and people are back to their own business. Adrenaline is still rushing through his veins, riding a type of high he's never experienced before.

“It was!” Changbin agrees, looking like he's riding a similar high. “Did you see how people suddenly turned their heads when I started?!”

“We should definitely do it without the vocals next time!” Chan chimes in and pulls them in for side hugs at the same time. “I think we need a celebratory drink now!”

They move to the kitchen and Chan mixes each of them a drink that looks better than it tastes, but Jisung couldn't care less about the taste.

Later, Changbin and Hyunjin pull him to the living room to dance, despite Jisung doing his best to refuse, but even dancing ends up being a lot of fun.

Hyunjin is a great dancer, Jisung especially notices this when Changbin has to leave them to go to the bathroom. In a lot of ways, Hyunjin reminds him of Felix with his very natural, fluid motions. Jisung doesn’t doubt that he is able to make Changbin a very happy man.

It makes Jisung miss Felix again, wishing he was dancing with him instead, but there will be time for that when he returns. For now, he’s just happy that Changbin found someone that’s so kind and likeable as Hyunjin, and who easily gets along with Felix as well. How perfect a combination the four of them are, except for the fact that they aren’t just four…

Hyunjin takes Jisung’s hand so he can twirl himself around, somehow making it graceful despite their height difference, and then Jisung gets a turn too, laughing as he stumbles, but Hyunjin’s got him before he can fall.

“Yah! Are you trying to steal my man?” Changbin yells over the music when he returns, but he’s got a big grin on his face.

“Yes, and he was almost convinced he should leave you,” Jisung answers and releases Hyunjin from his grip. “But you got back just in time.”

“I would never!” Hyunjin says, faking a highly offended tone, and Changbin pulls him in with a quick yank of his one hand. Next moment they are making out in the middle of the room.

“Get a room,” Jisung says, grinning, and Changbin flips him off without looking, still attached to Hyunjin. Jisung shakes his head with a chuckle. “Fine, take your time, I’m gonna head to the bathroom.”

He doesn't have to go upstairs, with only one person ahead of him in line for the downstairs bathroom. He slumps against the wall in the hallway, waiting his turn with a smile on his face.

The only thing that could've made the night better, was if Felix had been there with them too, and seen their little impromptu performance. But maybe sometime in the future they could do it for real, like Chan had said, and Felix could be there.

Jisung's smile disappears in an instant, as he swiftly crouches down.

Did he just see—

Slowly, he straightens up again, pushing flat against the wall to discreetly look around the corner to check if he really did see…

But no. None of the people he is looking at are even remotely close to looking like Minho. Besides, Felix said he was away, and Jisung hasn’t seen him all night.

The bathroom door opens with a loud sound, and Jisung is startled again. The girl who leaves the bathroom gives him a weird look but quickly leaves, and Jisung goes to the bathroom.

No, it was not Minho.

But why is his heart racing like that?

He takes care of his business, all the while ignoring his body’s overreaction to the thought of running into Minho, and carefully opens the door to peek outside when he’s finished. A few people are waiting for the bathroom now, and Jisung offers them an awkward smile as he hurries out.

He's being unnecessarily paranoid. Minho is not here, Minho is—

Here.

As soon as he spots Minho in the kitchen chatting to Chan, Jisung all but runs back around the corner to the hallway, panting against the wall.

Time to go home.

Jisung scoffs. Why is he like this? He shouldn’t be like this. And he shouldn’t let Minho being there dictate whether or not he should stay.

Determined to stay and enjoy himself, he finds Changbin and Hyunjin again, who are done eating each other’s faces. Instead, they’ve found something to drink and grabbed a beer for Jisung too.

“Woah, slow down!” Changbin says, chuckling, when Jisung downs half of it in one go.

Jisung wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. “Thirsty.”

“No kidding.” Changbin chuckles again. “Chan asked us to come join his team for a game of flip cup in the kitchen.”

In the kitchen. Where Minho is. “Oh, I think I’m gonna pass on that. I really suck at flip cup! You wouldn’t want me on your team, anyway,” Jisung says, scratching the back of his head.

“Dude, you know that doesn’t matter.”

“I’ll come watch, but you guys go ahead, I have to go check…” Jisung trails off, mumbling the rest of the sentence that doesn’t exist, while already backing away. “See you in a bit!”

If Minho is in the kitchen, then that’s the last place he wants to be. But not because he can’t. Because he definitely could! He simply doesn’t want to.

He crouches behind the people he passes by, even though he is already shorter than most of them. He’s headed for the hallway again, but then suddenly he spots Minho again, entering the living room from said hallway. He freezes for a moment as he notices him, but then turns around, going to the back of the living room, leading into the conjoined dining room, where people are chilling a little away from the loud music.

He rushes behind the small piece of wall that barely marks the separation from the living room, with no doors to close.

He counts to 60. Then one more time, and takes a peek around the wall.

“You’re avoiding him.”

Jisung jumps, startled, but quickly turns around to face Eunwoo. “No, I'm not!” he blurts out in his own defense, but it sounds more like a confession than anything else.

“Then what are you hiding here for?” Eunwoo asks, raising an eyebrow.

“I’m not hiding, just—” Jisung flails his hands around toward the crowd. “Observing.”

“Aha.” Eunwoo nods, not looking the least bit convinced. “You still don't smoke, Jisung?”

Jisung shakes his head. No, he does not. That first party when he met Minho was the first and last time he’d be smoking anything after the coughing fit that followed.

“Join me outside anyway? Unless you are too busy observing.”

Jisung takes a nervous glance at the living room but, again, he shouldn’t care. He nods at Eunwoo. “Sure.”

“I heard you put on quite a show earlier!” Eunwoo says loudly over the music as he leads them toward the backdoor, then as they go outside, continues more quietly, “I'm so bummed I missed it, but I only just got back. Yugyeom snatched a short clip, though. Looked pretty sick!”

“Oh, thank you,” Jisung answers and feels himself blush, but the cold weather cools down his cheeks. He’s thankful he found his jacket on the way out.

Even in the cold, several people seem to be sitting around the table in the usual spot at the back of the garden. As they get closer, Jisung can see smoke and hot breaths in the dark, chilly evening air.

And Minho.

Jisung glances at Eunwoo, who looks as chill as ever, and Jisung knows that if he bails now, he is only proving Eunwoo right in that he is indeed avoiding Minho. Which he is not! So, without looking at Minho, Jisung goes to an empty chair and sits down.

What happens next, takes him completely by surprise.

Minho, face blank, gets up from his seat, leaving the small group of people after one quick glare directed at Jisung.

What the hell?

Jisung shouldn’t be so annoyed by this, but he is.

Before he knows it, he’s up from his own seat, chasing Minho.

“Well, that was really fucking mature!” Jisung yells at Minho’s back, and Minho promptly stops, facing Jisung.

“What? Just as mature as you turning around as soon as you saw me not long ago?” Minho asks, deadpan.

“I—”

“And what the hell were you doing, dancing with that twink!”

“Excuse me?” Jisung says, blinking, taken aback at first, but when he realizes who Minho is referring to, anger quickly bubbles inside him. “Why do you care who I dance with? That’s none of your business!”

“I thought you liked Felix!” Minho says, sternly, stepping closer. “That makes it very much my business!”

“Unbelievable.” Jisung shakes his head. “Not that I owe you any explanation at all, but that was my friend Hyunjin and your teammate, which I don't know how you didn't even notice. And he is very much Changbin's boyfriend!”

“Whose?”

“Changbin? My best friend? The guy Chan and I make music with?” Jisung scoffs in disbelief at Minho’s obliviousness. His fists clench by his sides. “God, you’re so damn aggravating!”

“I’m aggravating?” Minho’s eyes grow wide. "Last time I checked, you are once again the one entering my house, yelling at me!”

“Well, once again I was invited!”

“I clearly need to do something about that!”

“What? You’re gonna ban me?”

“And what if I do?”

“Good luck, explaining that to Felix!”

“Felix isn’t here, is h—”

Jisung must be fucking possessed, because he rushes forward, kissing Minho mid-sentence. But this is what they do, right? Fight and “make up”. Or whatever you’d call it.

But in a split second, that line of thought is gone as Jisung stumbles backward at a hard push to his chest.

Minho is fuming, his eyes wide, and then he swiftly turns around, disappearing inside the noisy house.

Jisung is flabbergasted. Not because of Minho’s reaction of pushing him away, but because of himself.

That wasn't part of their deal.

He whips his head in the direction of the nearby table, where the people smoking have undoubtedly heard their quarrel and possibly borne witness to the total humiliation of Jisung kissing Minho.

Jisung rushes away, ignoring Eunwoo calling his name, and runs straight for the dorms.

“How are you holding up?”

Jisung lets go of the pulldown bar too fast, and the heavy plates of the lat machine clank loudly together, echoing off the walls in the gym as he whips his head around to look up at Changbin. “What? With what?”

Changbin drops his hand, holding a towel he was wiping his sweaty forehead with, and tilts his head. “With Felix being gone?”

“Oh. It’s been okay,” Jisung says and gets up, letting Changbin take the seat for his next set. “I’m okay.”

“That’s good.”

“Yeah.”

Changbin nods, smiling up at Jisung for a moment, then switches his focus to the bar in his hands, ready to get to work.

Jisung’s stomach squirms uncomfortably. Honestly, he’s been so consumed with what happened at the party that he hasn’t been thinking that much about Felix. Too confused by how he kissed Minho out of the blue like that. He shouldn’t have done that for a whole number of reasons. And Minho clearly agreed with that, pushing him away.

When Changbin asked him “how he was holding up,” he felt nothing but pure panic at first, thinking that Changbin was referring to the party. But he never told Changbin, so that would have meant that he had heard about it from somewhere else. That there would be gossip going around about how he was publicly rejected. He’s not sure he could deal with that kind of humiliation.

He’s not completely sure why he hasn’t told Changbin, though.

Jisung shakes his head.

“As long as I keep myself busy,” he starts as Changbin, much more controlled than himself, lets go of the bar. “Especially making music with you and Chan, it’s not too bad.”

Changbin beams up at him. “Oh! How do you feel about getting together tomorrow? I was talking to Chan earlier.”

“Definitely!” Jisung says without a second’s thought.

Fuck.

Jisung groans loudly as he paces his room.

He’s going to Chan’s room again. Which is great! But that again means the risk of bumping into Minho. He does not want to run into Minho. And be confronted with—

But the last time the three of them got together, he didn’t see him at all! He could be lucky like that again…

Jisung’s stomach churns. But the dread is much more real this time.

Just the thought of it makes him want to hide in a hole small enough for a mouse. Jisung scoffs. Minho would probably find that amusing. Run into him at the frat and watch as he searches for the smallest corner to crouch into like a lunatic…

He lets out another frustrated groan, kicking the leg of his desk chair. Not even a second later, he regrets it, letting out a loud “fuck”, jumping around on one foot while holding his throbbing toe.

He plops down onto his bed and gives the chair an angry look as if it’s the chair’s fault.

So what? He kissed Minho. Big fucking deal. It’s not like that’s something new! Should he have done it in public like that? Maybe not, but is that worse than how Minho pushed him away like he was a piece of trash?

No, if they run into each other, he should give Minho the same treatment as he got. Push him away like he’s the last person he wants to see or be near.

Fucking Minho.

The more he thinks about it, the more he truly doesn’t care about Minho at all. He really couldn’t care less about him! And when he goes to the frat house with Changbin the next day, it’s with a determined expression on his face that he walks past the closed door to Minho’s room and heads straight for Chan’s room.

They hole up in Chan’s room for several hours, immersed in new ideas and talks of putting on a real performance someday after the great reception at the party.

In the end, music is his escape, his safe space, and not even Minho can ruin that for him. So when it’s time to call it a day, Minho is the furthest from his mind, even as he and Changbin say goodbye to Chan and leave his room.

“I honestly think that might become one of our best tracks yet!” Jisung excitedly says, practically jumping as they head toward the stairs at the end of the hallway.

“You really popped off with that rap!” Changbin says, matching the pumped-up energy, and gives his shoulder an affectionate push. “Don’t know how you came up with that on the spot!”

Jisung’s ears redden at the praise, and he immediately pushes back. “What about you! You really—”

“Jisung.”

Jisung freezes in his tracks, his foot hovering in the air, about to take the first step down the stairs. It takes him too long to turn around, but when he does, Minho is standing a little ways down the hallway in the doorway to his room. Jisung just blinks.

“Can I talk to you for a second?” Minho asks when Jisung doesn’t respond.

On the inside, Jisung scoffs. How about no? How about he just turns away and storms out, the same way Minho left him at the party? On the outside, however, Jisung shrugs his shoulders, going for unbothered. “Sure.”

“In here?” Minho nods to his room.

Jisung looks at Changbin. “You go on ahead.”

“Are you sure? I can wait,” Changbin says, clearly feeling the tension.

“It's fine,” Jisung reassures him and pats him on the arm. “Talk to you later, okay?”

With a slightly apprehensive look, Changbin nods. “Call me.” Then he gets on his way, descending the stairs alone.

Jisung doesn’t hesitate as he walks past Minho, silently entering his room. Behind him, Minho quietly closes the door.

“That was Changbin, right?” Minho asks, nodding at the closed door when Jisung turns around.

Jisung gives him a puzzled look. “What?”

“Your best friend,” Minho says. “You mentioned him.”

“Yeah, that was him, but—” Jisung furrows his eyebrows, shaking his head. What the hell? He scoffs. “Why am I here, Minho?”

Minho looks down at the floor for a moment, looking like he’s preparing himself for something, and Jisung tenses up. Then he finds Jisung’s eyes, his gaze unexpectedly soft. “I wanted to apologize.”

Jisung blinks. He did not hear that right. Did he? But Minho just stares at him, waiting. “Apologize for what?” Jisung finally asks, unsure about where exactly this is headed.

“For leaving you like that,” Minho says calmly. “It wasn’t very nice. Of me.”

“No, it wasn’t,” Jisung shoots, remembering the humiliation all too clearly. But here Minho is, apologizing for exactly that.

“Well, I’m sorry.”

Jisung is too stunned to speak, but if Minho is big enough and mature enough to apologize, then— “I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have—” Kissed you. “Yelled at you. That wasn’t fair either.”

“It’s okay,” Minho says, nodding. “So, we’re good?”

“We’re good.”

They nod at each other, and an awkward silence slowly fills the room.

Jisung is the first one to look away, and his eyes land on the TV behind Minho, showing a paused scene from an anime he doesn't recognize based on the current scene alone.

“What are you—” Jisung starts, but right at the same time, Minho speaks as well.

“Do you—”

They both quickly close their mouths. There's an awkward silence again while Jisung wonders if he should try and finish his sentence.

Minho beats him to it. “What were you saying?”

“Oh, uhm, what are you watching?” Jisung gestures toward the TV.

Minho looks back over his shoulder at the screen as if he’s forgotten what he was watching. “Spy x Family.”

Jisung’s eyes immediately grow big. “I love that one!” he exclaims excitedly before he can stop himself. He quickly slams his mouth, his cheeks flushing at his outburst.

The corner of Minho’s mouth twitches upward. “Do you want to watch?”

“Huh?” Jisung dumbly utters, too surprised by Minho for the second time that night.

Minho shrugs one shoulder. “If you want, you could stay and watch for a bit. If you want.”

Jisung doesn’t have the mind to think things through and automatically says, “Yeah, sure.”

Minho gestures to the bed, the only place for them to comfortably sit and watch the big screen on the dresser. Jisung takes a seat on one side and Minho on the other.

They watch the episode in silence, Jisung all too aware of the few feet separating them, but he doesn’t let himself even glance at Minho. When the episode ends, Minho pauses it before the next one can autoplay.

“Do you miss Felix?” he asks, turning to Jisung.

“A lot,” Jisung admits with a sigh. The only other person in the world who might understand him is Minho, after all.

“Me too. Without him, it's just been a little bit— You know.”

Lonely. Jisung knows. “Yeah.”

“One more?” Minho nods to the TV.

Jisung offers a quick smile. “Why not.”

Minho returns the smile and points the remote at the TV, but without pressing play, he drops his hand again, turning to Jisung again. “Do you mind if we don't tell him?”

“Tell him what?”

Minho grimaces. “That we fought.”

Jisung can't help but let out a chuckle, remembering Felix's request before leaving. Maybe this is why Minho was so quick to apologize, but do the circumstances really matter? “He told you not to fight with me?”

“Kind of, yeah.”

“Me too.”

Minho snorts, shaking his head. “He really wants us to get along, doesn't he?”

Before Jisung can respond, Minho has already pressed play.

Jisung has no idea how they ended up like this, lying on the bed with Minho's hand on his waist and vice versa. The last thing he remembers is them starting what must've been a fifth episode in a row, and apparently, somewhere during that, they fell asleep.

He can't hear the television, the show probably paused after autoplaying for too long. Or maybe Jisung fell asleep, and Minho turned it off when he noticed. Then Minho decided to sleep too, and they ended up like this? Jisung shakes his head internally at that possibility.

Now, how does he get out of this situation? He can't imagine Minho being too fond of waking up like this.

Holding his breath, he carefully slides his hand toward himself, but just when his fingers brush over the last inch of Minho's shirt, he feels the hand on his waist squeeze. Surprised, he tilts his head up, eyes open, and his nose brushes the tip of Minho's.

He freezes with his lips barely an inch from Minho's. His eyes flicker to Minho's which are still closed, and he quickly squeezes them shut again. Minho's breath is hot against his lips, and Jisung’s breath stutters as he takes it in.

Trying to keep his pulse under control, Jisung convinces himself that Minho is asleep, but then their noses brush against each other again, and it isn't just for a brief moment this time. The tip of Minho’s nose circles his own, and then, in a way that can only be deliberate, it nudges Jisung's nose upward. Jisung follows the motion, and as his head tips further upward, their lips brush.

There is no controlling his pulse, as their lips ghost over each other, searching for nonverbal permission. Then Jisung feels the slight touch of the tip of Minho’s tongue against his upper lip. His stomach flips. It’s all he needs to press their lips together.

It's slow and lazy the way they kiss, half asleep, no rush.

Maybe if Jisung doesn’t open his eyes, he can pretend that this is just a dream, and that it isn’t actually Minho. Or better yet, pretend that it’s Felix. That it’s Felix’s lips making him feeling hungrier every second. But it’s not, and he is too aware of that to ignore it. Too aware that it’s Minho’s hand sliding up his waist, Minho’s tongue massaging against his own.

And it's Minho's scent all around him. But he doesn't hate it. And why would he? He never hated fooling around with Minho, so why should he hate it now?

He squeezes his eyelids tighter together for a second, and then he lets himself forget anything else that has ever happened between them. Any awkwardness or anger. Any jealousy. He’s needy and full of want. He needs this. Wants it.

The heat increases between them as it turns from lazy to eager, and Jisung gets on top of Minho, straddling him. Minho grabs him by the ass, guiding Jisung into a grinding motion, and Minho pushes up against him, letting him know that he needs this just as much. He can feel Minho grow hard against him, and he’s fully hard himself by now, already feeling desperate for release.

But it’s not enough, and it’s not fast enough.

Minho groans into his mouth as Jisung lifts his hips, pulling them apart. Jisung quickly moves one hand in between them, blindly fumbling with the button on Minho’s pants, their lips still too busy for breaks. He finally gets the button open and zips down Minho’s pants, hurriedly pulling Minho’s cock free.

He starts stroking him, turning himself on more by having the other in his hand, and he hears and feels the impact it has on Minho, who is struggling to keep up with Jisung’s lips through his moans.

Minho hurriedly finds revenge, sliding Jisung’s sweatpants and underwear down enough so he can grab Jisung’s cock as well. Jisung moans loudly, the feel of someone else's hand more than welcome after nights on his own.

They stroke each other, a little clumsily whenever the impact is too much for one of them. Jisung is eager for a quick release, but then Minho’s hand stops and loosens its grip on him.

Jisung whines at the loss, but Minho’s intentions become clear when he stops Jisung’s hand as well and readjusts him on top of him to make their cocks touch. He grabs around both of them. But Minho’s fingers aren’t quite long enough to reach completely, and Jisung joins the hold. With their hands touching, they start again, cocks pushed together between them, precum making the slide even better.

It’s frustrating at times, the slightly awkward feel of a cock slipping instead of just a firm hand encasing him completely, but it lengthens the pleasure with the slight interruptions, making Jisung more desperate than he already is whenever his climb to climax is interrupted, and it is so, so much hotter than just a hand, feeling the other's hard cock against his own.

Jisung eagerly starts grinding into it, and both of them struggle to keep quiet, their lips doing their best to stiffle their moans.

There's no mistaking it when Minho comes; his muffled whimpers and desperate moves, his grip tigthening around them. He immediately takes Jisung with him, and Jisung wishes he could hear Minho more clearly. Hear his moans echo against the wall.

Their hands slow down, and their lips part as they let go of their combined hold around their spent cocks, both of them panting.

When Jisung feels like he can breathe again, he sits up, looking down at Minho's shirt. “Sorry for the mess.”

Minho lifts his head, looking down at his stained shirt as well. “Well, at least half of the mess is mine, so…”

Jisung chuckles. “Good point.”

“Grab the tissues?”

Jisung nods and unstraddles Minho, automatically going straight for the nightstand, where he knows Minho usually keeps a box of tissues.

He pulls open the top drawer and pulls out the box, but does a double-take when he sees what is underneath it. In a framed picture, a woman and a little kid in her lap smile happily at the camera. He’s sure, he’s never seen the woman before, but she still looks familiar, and the child has the same sparkling eyes Jisung’s seen in pictures on his phone.

He hurriedly closes the drawer again before Minho can turn to look at what’s taking him so long.

“Here.” He hands the box over after grabbing a few tissues himself, and Minho removes the worst of their mess from his shirt before sitting up and pulling it off.

Jisung is staring, his eyes hungrily taking in Minho’s naked upper body despite just finishing. He puts himself safely back into his pants before he can get too tempted.

“I think I’ll get going,” he says, suddenly feeling determined to leave before Minho might ask him to. “I’ve got to catch up on a few things.”

“Yeah, sure,” Minho says, throwing the stained shirt to the hamper without looking at him.

Jisung gives him an awkward smile that he doesn’t see, then turns around to open the door.

“Jisung.” Jisung stops, and when he looks back, Minho raises an eyebrow at him. “See you around?”

Jisung nods. “Yeah, see you around.”

Jisung spins the fork on his plate, but he doesn’t lift it, even when there isn’t room for more spaghetti to be caught. It’s been a few days since he saw Minho, and once again, he’s had things circling his already too-full brain. He glances at the plate in front of Changbin, which is already half empty. His own is not near that yet, but he just keeps spinning the fork. Changbin had dragged him to the nearby pasta place, declaring his deep love for Italian pasta once more. Jisung can confidently say that the only thing Changbin might love more is Hyunjin.

The fork finally stops. “I don’t think they are related.”

“Huh?” Changbin mumbles, his mouth stuffed full. “Who?”

“Minho and Felix. At least not completely.” Jisung finally brings the fork up, barely able to close his mouth around the big serving.

“That would definitely make it easier for me to talk to you about them, so I hope that’s the case.” Changbin chuckles, but his words remind Jisung of the very unusual situation he is in. “But what makes you say that?” he asks before Jisung can fall down into a spiral of what the fuck he is doing with the two brothers.

Jisung swallows the mouthful. “I saw a picture of Minho as a kid.”

He’d been thinking about it ever since he saw the picture in Minho's drawer with the same innocent eyes he'd seen when Minho stood under the winter lights full of wonder. It also reminded him that he hadn’t seen any pictures of Minho that young at the Lees, and there definitely seemed to be a resemblance with the woman holding him.

“Sounds scary,” Changbin says with a grimace, exaggerating a shiver going through his body.

Jisung shrugs a shoulder. “No, it was— He was cute.”

“Cute?” Changbin raises both eyebrows. “Since when do you call Minho cute? And since when do you smile like that while talking about him? Looks like someone is catching—”

“I am not catching anything!” Jisung exclaims, immediately making sure nothing even resembling a smile is showing. He rubs one of his cheeks. Was he really smiling?

Changbin nods but looks entirely too unconvinced for Jisung’s taste. “Sure.”

Jisung decides to ignore it, there is a more important point being made here. He points his fork at Changbin. “Anyway, he wasn’t alone in the picture. There was a woman too.”

“You saw a picture of a kid and a woman?”

“It was his mom,” Jisung says, recalling Minho's distinct eyes on the woman, too. “I’m pretty sure, at least.”

Changbin finishes his next mouthful, looking thoughtful. “Couldn't it have been any strange woman? You literally met their parents.”

“Yeah, but… I wish I'd gotten a better look, but Minho was right there. I was just getting the tissues from his drawer.”

“Tissues, eh?” Changbin wiggles his eyebrows.

“Yeah, we— you know.”

“Yeah, I do,” Changbin says with a smirk. If Jisung didn’t know better, he’d say that Changbin is looking a little proud of him. On second thought, that’s probably the case. “So, I assume, Felix is okay with all that while he's away?”

“Yeah, why wouldn’t he be?” Jisung says without thought, but then furrows his brows, putting the fork down on the table. “Do you think he might not be?”

“I don’t know, man. I’m not the one involved with two people at the same time. You didn’t talk about that before he left?”

Jisung’s stomach swoops. Did they? They did not. “Yeah, of course, we did.” Jisung smiles and stuffs his mouth full again.

He should tell Felix.

Because what if he isn’t okay with it?

Felix told him he got a little jealous before, so how will this make him feel when he wasn’t even there when it happened?

Jisung shifts around, getting more comfortable on Felix’s bed as he leans his back against the wall. His hand is sweaty, clutching his phone. Felix texted that he’d call him tonight. They haven’t had the chance to talk for a while, and not once after his latest heated moment with Minho. They’d only been texting due to Felix’s busy schedule and the time zone difference.

Jisung pulls up the duvet, taking in the faint smell of Felix still left in the fabric. Any minute now.

When the phone finally rings, Jisung’s heart skips a beat, and he scrambles to answer.

“Hello?”

“Hi, Jisungie!” Felix says happily through the phone, and Jisung’s insides instantly turn mushy at the sound of his voice. “Did you sit ready for my call?”

“Not at all,” Jisung lies, but it’s not like he’s trying to sound convincing. “I’d completely forgotten all about it.”

“Liar. I bet you were waiting, phone in hand.”

Jisung chuckles at the call-out. Felix knows him too well. “Only for the past twenty minutes or so.”

Felix laughs but then quickly stops. “Sorry, I was a bit late.”

Jisung shakes his head, even though Felix can’t see it. “Don’t be. I’m just happy you finally had the time to call. And I get to hear your voice.”

“Sorry, I’ve been so busy,” Felix says, and Jisung can easily picture the pout on his face.

“Thought I just told you not to be sorry!”

“Sorry!”

They both end up laughing at that. God, Jisung has missed him so much.

“Do you want to see me, too, or is my voice enough?”

“Are you really going to spoil me with your pretty face?”

“I think you’ve earned it for being so patient.”

The next moment, there’s a request for a video call. Jisung quickly accepts.

It’s instant when he sees Felix’s face on the small screen in his hand, his whole body tingling as too many butterflies flutter around, trying to escape his stomach all at once. He exhales with a fond smile. “Hey.”

Felix immediately returns the smile and lets out a slightly timid-sounding, “Hi.”

Adorable. So freaking adorable. With all his freckles that are even more visible now due to the hotter climate and sun exposure. “I’ve really missed that face.”

“Yours isn’t too bad either.” Felix winks, but then cocks his head. “Are you in my bed?”

Jisung shrugs his shoulders with a smirk. “Maybe.”

“You must really miss me.”

Jisung brings his hand into the view, his index finger and thumb almost touching. “Just a teeny tiny bit.”

Felix giggles. “How are you? Tell me everything.”

“Pretty good. Nothing unusual,” Jisung automatically says, things having been quite uneventful overall, but an uneasy feeling in his stomach reminds him that's not completely right. “Actually, I have to tell you something.”

“Okay?” Felix says warily, eyebrows furrowed. It doesn’t help Jisung’s anxious feeling.

“So, the other day,” Jisung starts, “Minho and I…”

“Please, don’t tell me you fought,” Felix pleads, already looking defeated.

“No!” Jisung hurriedly says. “Well, we did, but then we also made up, and we, uhm, fooled around a bit.” Jisung squeezes his eyes together as he admits it. He doesn’t have the mind to care about the fact that he told Minho they could keep the fighting to themselves. It’s far more important to him to be honest with Felix. No more lies this time. He shakes his head apologetically. “I’m so sorry. We never talked about whether that was okay while you were away, and it just happened without Minho and I even discussing it, but then I remembered that you told me that you got a little bit jealous last time, and the last thing I want to do is make you uncomfortable.”

Felix blinks. “Oh. Just a second.”

Jisung sees nothing but the ceiling as Felix puts the phone down. Jisung’s pulse is racing as he waits, trying to decipher the sound of moving around and a loud click. This can’t be good, right?

Before he knows it, Felix is back on his screen. “I had to make sure the door was locked,” he says, casually. “Why don’t you tell me about it?”

Jisung hesitates. “You’re not mad?”

Felix raises an eyebrow. “Mad that you made up? I think relieved is the right word,” he says with a chuckle.

“But we never discussed if being intimate was okay without you…”

Felix smiles softly. “Jisung, I never expected you two to be celibate in my absence. But since I wasn’t there…” The tone of his voice shifts, getting deeper, and it sends shivers down Jisung’s spine. “I might need some more details about what happened.”

Jisung’s stomach flips as he understands what Felix is asking, and he swallows before starting. “We fell asleep on Minho’s bed while watching a show, and then suddenly we were kissing.”

Felix bites his bottom lip. “Yeah? Then what?”

“I got on top of him, and—” Jisung pauses. Is this a little weird? Telling Felix about it? But it’s only right since Felix is asking about it. He thinks back, remembering the way Minho’s hands grabbed his ass, pulling him forward. “He made me grind against him.”

There’s a low groan from Felix, and Jisung suddenly feels hot under the duvet, having to push it down.

“We kept our clothes on the whole time, just grinding against each other, until I pulled out Minho’s cock to jerk him off. And then he pulled out mine.”

“Shit.” Jisung can’t see it, but he has a feeling he knows exactly what is happening out of frame as Felix shifts around.

“Then Minho grabbed both of us, and we started stroking us together, just cocks pressed tight in a combined grip.”

“Fuck, that sounds so hot. I wish I’d been there to see it.” There’s no mistaking the sound of Felix jerking himself off and the way he’s not able to hold the phone still. Jisung decides to join him, pulling his already half-hard cock out over his sweats.

“I wish you’d been there, too,” Jisung says earnestly. “I wish I could touch you. I’d make you feel good, too.”

Felix whines. “You’re making me feel good,” he breathes. “So, so good.”

“I miss fucking you,” Jisung says, stroking himself to the thought of it.

“I miss you filling me up,” Felix breathes and lets out a moan. “Your cum dripping out of me.”

Jisung is the one to whine this time, his hand gripping himself tighter. “When you get home, I’ll fill you up. Let you drip all over.”

“Yes, please. I want that so much.”

“Fuck you until you can’t walk anymore.”

They both get too caught up in it to say much after that, just watching each other as they jerk off. Jisung can’t even see much else but Felix’s face, but it’s already one of the hottest things he could possibly imagine. And then there’s the sound of him, heavy breaths and staccato moans accompanied by lewd squelching sounds from what is happening but he can’t see. He doesn’t need more than that to keep his mind going. Then Felix’s face contorts beautifully in pleasure as he comes, eyes rolling to the back of his head.

“Fuck—”

The sound of Felix coming is absolutely heavenly after being without it for almost two weeks, and Jisung fervently strokes himself to completion. Warm cum covers his hand, thankfully avoiding Felix’s duvet. His head hits the back of the wall hard as his hand slows down until it stops completely, and they are both panting, catching their breaths. Small beads of sweat glisten on Felix’s forehead. Jisung would lick them off if he could.

“Fuck, I needed that,” Felix lets out with a deep exhale, breaking the comfortable silence. “I haven’t had the time or been much alone at all.”

Jisung can only imagine. Felix is sharing his room with several people. “Sounds tough. But I know it’s worth it.” Jisung smiles. He doesn’t doubt that Felix feels that way about the trip. Every single excited text and picture, a clear testament to that.

Felix smiles. “It is. It’s everything I hoped it would be. But I really can’t wait to see you again. I miss you so much, Jisungie.”

The butterflies are fluttering all over inside Jisung again. “I miss you too. When you’re back, I’ll show you just how much,” he answers, his eyes scanning Felix’s face that he misses so much. They linger on his cheeks and nose bridge. “I’ll kiss every single one of your freckles. I don’t care how long it takes.”

Felix giggles at that, and Jisung misses him even more. “Want to clean up and fall asleep while talking?” Felix tilts his head, making a strand of hair fall prettily in front of his eyes. “It’s too early for me, but I know it’s getting late for you.”

In his mind, Jisung carefully brushes the strand of hair away and places a kiss on one of the freckles underneath it. “I’d love that.”

“Are you sure about this?” Changbin asks as they are walking down the street. “It’s not too late to bail.”

“Yes, I’m sure.”

Jisung isn't second-guessing his decision at all. He's only getting more excited as they quickly approach the tattoo parlor he meticulously chose for his first tattoo. He’d wanted one for a long while, and when he finally found a tattooist that fit the style he wanted, he didn’t hesitate to book it. Getting it done while not stressed with classes seemed like a good idea, too.

“Besides, I already paid the deposit,” Jisung points out, “so it is, in fact, too late.”

“I’m not holding your hand if you get scared.”

“I promise I won’t need you to.” He doesn’t. Changbin is just there for emotional support. No hand-holding needed. “I talked to Felix, by the way. He’s okay with it.”

“With you getting a tattoo?”

“No, you know, me and Minho—without him. But the tattoo, too, yes.” Jisung had brought it up casually during their latest conversation, asking him if he liked tattoos without telling him of his plans. Felix’s reply to the question had thankfully been more than positive (”Hot!”)

“Thought you already said that, but good for you!” Changbin chuckles. “So, are you finally going to figure out this whole relationship thing, too?”

“We’re not in a relationship,” Jisung quickly states.

Changbin looks taken aback by the abrupt answer for a moment, but it doesn’t stop him from staying on the subject. “So, no need to talk about that? You have no need of, I don’t know, putting a label on it?”

“No.” Jisung shrugs his shoulders. “I mean, it’s not really possible with the way things are anyway.”

“You mean, you dating two people, who are also—“ Changbin gestures wildly in the air as he avoids elaborating, but Jisung knows exactly what he’s not saying (and thankful that he’s not saying it out loud in public).

“I think that goes without saying, yes.”

They are finally there, and Jisung opens the glass door without hesitation, already having been there once before for a talk about the details. When they enter, there’s one person in front of him at the front desk talking to the person behind it.

The tattoo artist acknowledges him with a nod but then turns to the person in front again. Jisung is early for his appointment, but better too early than too late, right?

He faces the wall, studying one of the many pictures of tattoos while he waits his turn.

“But you’re still super into Felix.”

Jisung twitches at the mention. Because, of course, Changbin knows that. He hasn't exactly been hiding it. But he keeps his gaze straight ahead as he shrugs his shoulders again. “We’re just having fun.”

Having fun. His stomach twists as he thinks of the person he misses the most. And then of the third person in the picture, who’s making things so much more complicated. Yeah, he’s just having fun…

“Just—be careful, okay?” Changbin's voice is full of genuine concern, and there's a lump in Jisung's throat. “I’d hate to see you get hurt.”

He finally looks at Changbin, smiling. “I’m fine. Everything is under control.” He nods firmly once for extra assurance.

“If you say so,” Changbin says, giving him a pitiful look. Jisung figures that's the end of it, but a short moment later, Changbin opens his mouth again. “But if you ever need to talk about it,” he starts and puts a hand on Jisung's shoulder, “you know where to find Hyunjin, right?”

That earns Changbin a hit on the arm and an eye roll. “Have I ever told you that you are my worst friend?”

“Aw, love you, too, bro,” he says, squeezing him in a side hug but then releasing again. “By the way, I've been thinking—”

“That's never a good thing.”

“Would it still just be called a double date if it was me and Hyunjin, and then the three of you?”

Jisung hits him on the arm again. Then, luckily for Changbin, he's called forward to the front desk.

Jisung is standing in front of the closet mirror, his shirt hanging from his hand as he looks at his tattooed chest.

He’s been doing that a lot the past few days—studying the meticulous lines of the compass, the big letters spelling out “blessed” and the small scribbled quote underneath it—but can anyone blame him? He turns a little, letting the light catch it from different angles. It’s already not red anymore. Healing well. Definitely worth the pain. He can’t wait to show it to Felix.

He’s about to pull on his loose black t-shirt again when his phone vibrates on his desk. He glances at it from afar, hoping to see Felix’s name on the text notification, but the preview shows no name, just a number he doesn’t recognize.

Unknown: Want to come over?

Well, that clearly wasn’t meant for him.

Jisung: Sorry I think you got the wrong number.

He quickly types the message and throws the phone onto his bed, deal done. But soon after, it buzzes again.

Unknown: This isn’t Han Jisung’s number?

Jisung furrows his eyebrows, blinking at the text. Who would—out of the blue—ask him to come over, whose number he doesn’t even have? Who—

Jisung: Minho?

Who else would text him like that? He doesn’t remember ever giving Minho his phone number, but it's not hard to imagine where he got it from.

Unknown: Yes

Jisung quickly saves the number, and it’s with a smirk that he types his next reply. He blames the tattoo for making him feel extra confident.

Jisung: Is this a booty call? ;)

The answer comes promptly.

Minho: Forget I asked

Jisung snorts. Typical Minho. Well, maybe it was a bit too direct. But with Minho, really, the best thing to be is direct.

He considers whether he should text Minho again, tell him he was just teasing him, and ask what was actually on his mind, but before he can do that, there is yet another buzz.

Minho: Are you coming or not?

Jisung laughs out loud at that, shaking his head, before quickly searching for his best friend’s contact.

It only rings twice before Changbin picks up. “Hey, on your way soon?”

“How mad will you be if I bail on movie night?” Jisung asks, immediately cutting to the chase.

“What? You suddenly got something better to do?”

“As a matter of fact, yes,” Jisung says, confidently, then hesitates before hurriedly adding, “Minho asked me if I wanted to come over.”

At the other end of the phone, Changbin scoffs. “You’re saying you’d rather see Minho than hang out with me, your favorite person in the whole world, and my spectacular boyfriend?”

To be fair, Jisung had joined the two of them for quite a few movie nights at Changbin’s dorm lately. It was, of course, always fun, but hanging out with a lovey-dovey couple wasn’t always his favorite thing, especially not when said couple was clearly struggling to restrain themselves.

“Let's just say that Minho can offer me something you two can’t,” he says bluntly. Because that’s what it’s really about, and if there’s something Changbin understands, it’s that.

“Fair point. Go get your brains fucked out or whatever your plans are. You got my blessing.”

Jisung chuckles. “Thank you very much.”

“Wait, what do I tell Hyunjin?”

Jisung takes a moment to think, then says, “Tell him I got an offer I couldn’t refuse.”

“Did you forget that he thinks you’re involved with Felix?”

“Right. Well, I’m sure you’ll come up with something. Gotta go now, have fun!” Jisung hangs up and quickly opens his conversation with Minho, who he left on “read”.

But then he pauses. If he’s so into Felix, then why is he so eager to hook up with Minho again? That can’t be normal, right? But Felix doesn’t mind it. On the contrary. And, to be honest, fucking Minho is far from the worst thing in the world. And like he told Changbin, they are having fun. He shouldn’t overthink it…

He runs a hand through his hair. Why is he suddenly overthinking this?

His phone interrupts him, but the text doesn’t say much. But then again, it says a lot.

Minho: ?

Jisung chuckles. Impatient.

He looks up from his phone, thinking, then freezes as he catches his reflection in the mirror again. Does Minho like tattoos? Wouldn’t that be fun to find out.

Jisung: I’ll be there in 20

Jisung stops. He can hear low music coming from inside Minho’s room.

Just like when he’s been visiting Chan, he walked straight into the frat house and up the stairs. Downstairs, people were casually but loudly chilling in the living room, drinking beer, listening to music. It’s not like he was actually sneaking in, but no one noticed when he entered. Or maybe they just didn’t care. He wasn’t gonna interrupt them to find out. Either way, Minho would probably like it better if they didn’t know about his visit.

So now he is right there, standing in front of Minho’s door. Should he knock? Or does he just walk in? Minho is expecting him, and he’s never knocked before. But then, this is all a new situation.

Slightly hesitant, he knocks.

He feels awkward while he waits for an answer, but it only takes a moment before the door opens.

“Hey,” Minho says, standing in the doorway.

Jisung’s eyes move down and up again, taking in the sight of Minho in gray sweats and a black tee. His hair is tousled and damp, looking more handsome than should be possible in a simple outfit like that, not dressed to impress.

“Are you coming in?”

“Oh, yeah,” Jisung says, snapping out of it with a nod, and walks past Minho. He scans the room, which doesn’t look any different from usual, with Minho’s bed made up neatly, everything in place. On the nightstand, however, is what looks a lot like a tube of lube alongside a box of tissues. Jisung’s stomach swoops.

Ignoring the lube, he walks over to a small speaker on the dresser, from which R’n’B tunes are coming out. Beside it, there’s an unlocked tablet with an open playlist. He gives it a scroll. “So, you asked me to come over?” Jisung says, while not actually paying the list of songs any real attention.

Jisung hears the door close. “I did.”

“Why?”

It’s silent for a moment, then Minho simply says, “I showered.”

Jisung’s finger stops scrolling as he turns to look at Minho, eyebrows furrowed. Then he smirks, suddenly feeling much more confident. “You showered? So this is a booty call.”

“Can you not call it that?” Minho deadpans, rolling his eyes, but Jisung ignores it and leaves the tablet in favor of moving closer, stopping in front of Minho.

He’s still smirking as he raises an eyebrow and can’t help but ask, “So, my booty or yours? Sounds like you might already have something in mind.”

Minho scoffs. “Just forget it.”

Jisung shrugs his shoulders like it’s nothing. “No problem. I’ll leave.” He takes one step past Minho toward the door, but, as expected, he’s stopped from going any further when Minho grabs his wrist.

Jisung looks down at Minho’s hand with the tight hold on him, and when he lifts his head, Minho does the same, their eyes meeting. That undeniable tension that so often surrounds them is immediately there, and Jisung feels his pulse rising. He’s sure that Minho is holding his breath just like he is. Why is it always like this between them?

Jisung mirrors Minho as his eyes flicker down to his lips, and not even a second later, they crash together. Jisung cups Minho’s face with both hands, and Minho pulls him in by the jacket, both their lips hungry and needy against each other.

Minho’s back hits the wall with a hard thud as they kiss, and Jisung has half a mind to stop up and ask if he’s okay, but then Minho is clearly okay, too busy sticking his tongue down his throat all the while fumbling to rid Jisung of his jacket, dropping it to the floor.

Then Minho suddenly pushes him harshly on the chest, and the flashback to the last time he did that catches Jisung completely off guard, along with the sting from his still slightly sensitive tattoo, and he stumbles backward, but before he can worry whether he did something wrong, Minho pounces forward, and the back of Jisung’s legs hit the bed. He falls down onto it, sitting on the edge, and Minho immediately straddles him, kissing him again.

It’s all he can do to keep up with Minho. Minho’s teeth nibble at his lower lip as if he might just eat him before pushing his tongue inside to play again. His hands roam around Jisung’s body, clutching the fabric of his t-shirt, when Jisung hisses as he brushes over the tattoo.

“Be careful of the tattoo,” Jisung mumbles into Minho's mouth. “It's still a little tender.”

Minho freezes, then pulls back, blinking repeatedly. “The what?”

Jisung can't hold back a smile at the surprised face. “Tattoo.”

Minho blinks again, as if he can't quite comprehend Jisung's words.

Instead of explaining, Jisung decides it would be much easier to show it, and quickly pulls off his shirt to no objections from Minho. Minho’s eyes grow wide as Jisung leans back on his hands, giving him a better look at a distance. Jisung glances down at the ink. “Got it a few days ago.”

There’s more blinking as Minho's eyes are fixed on the tattoo, silently watching. Jisung’s expression turns worried.

“Do you not like tattoos?” he asks, suddenly feeling a little self-conscious.

Minho ghosts a careful finger over the black ink. “It’s so big….”

“That’s what he said,” Jisung says before he can stop himself and chuckles.

Minho gives him a deadpan stare, not looking impressed by the joke. “You shouldn’t be allowed to talk. Ever.”

“No?” Jisung says, raising an eyebrow. “Shut me up then.”

Like a hungry feline, Minho pounces again, and Jisung’s back hits the mattress as Minho devours his lips again.

Jisung ruffles Minho's t-shirt, eager to pull it off of him, but before he can, Minho pulls back. He stares down at him again, eyes repeatedly flickering to the tattoo. His chest is moving rapidly, and Jisung feels more confidence soar through him, watching the effect the new addition to his chest has on Minho. Minho clearly likes tattoos.

Jisung gets no warning as it happens so fast, Minho backing up to hurriedly open his pants and pull out his half-hard cock. He gets up on his elbows, looking down at Minho between his legs, amused. “You think you can just do whatever you want?”

Minho doesn’t react to his question, but licks up his shaft, sending shivers down Jisung’s spine. Then he looks up at him, eyes boring into Jisung’s. “Yes.”

Jisung’s laugh at Minho’s curt reply gets stuck in his throat, as Minho’s full focus is on his cock, skillfully popping the head into his mouth.

Just like that first time he sucked him off in the bathroom all those months ago, Minho knows exactly what he is doing. How many cocks as he sucked to get that good at it? There’s an unpleasant swoop inside Jisung’s belly, but then it’s followed by something much more pleasant, as Minho takes him fully into his mouth.

Minho plays with his cock, sucking and licking, sending Jisung’s eyes to the back of his head. If he wasn’t fully hard before, he definitely is now. But Minho is too good, and Jisung desperately grabs him by the hair, stopping him before it’s too late. Minho looks up at him with big blinking eyes, cheeks bulging with his mouth still stuffed full of cock. It’s almost enough to end Jisung right there.

“Is this all you needed me here for?” Jisung asks, breathing heavily as he tries to calm down.

Minho shakes his head lightly, tickling Jisung’s cock with the movement, before lifting off, letting it slip out of his mouth like a lollipop. “No.”

“Well, you better take it easy then.” Jisung watches a string of saliva from Minho’s bottom lip, still connecting them. His cock is throbbing, begging him to let Minho finish him off already, but if Minho wants him for more than a blowjob, he’ll happily ignore any throbbing or begging.

He quickly sits up, but only to grab Minho and pull him up to him, lips all over each other again.

“Why are you still wearing so many clothes?” Jisung asks between kisses, sliding his hands up under Minho’s t-shirt.

”Why haven’t you taken them off yet?” Minho answers and catches Jisung’s bottom lip between his teeth before letting it go again.

Jisung doesn’t need any convincing. He pulls off Minho’s shirt as fast as he can, then, eager to finish the job right away, he pushes Minho off of him onto the mattress and gets up to pull off his sweats, too, under which Minho, once again, hasn’t bothered to put on any underwear after showering.

Jisung immediately goes to lick a long stripe up Minho’s full cock, too inviting to be left alone, and Minho visibly shivers. Jisung gives it a few languid strokes, then takes him into his mouth, tasting the beads of precum on his tongue as he starts sucking him off. Having Minho in his mouth is far from the worst thing, and when Minho is writhing underneath him, moaning, it gets close to a favorite.

“Don’t—” Minho lets out with some difficulty, not finishing his sentence, but it’s enough to make Jisung stop.

”Don’t what?” Jisung asks, taking in Minho’s flustered expression. Adorable.

“I need,“ Minho says, breathing heavily, “you in me.”

With a lopsided grin on his face, Jisung pecks the tip of Minho’s cock, just because he can, before letting it bounce freely against Minho’s stomach, ready to move his attention elsewhere.

With both hands, he pushes up Minho’s knees, exposing his hole as his legs open to the sides. Minho catches them, hooking a hand under each.

Jisung looks down amused, then licks one of his fingers before sliding it around the rim, making it glisten with saliva. “Looks like someone started without me.”

Minho’s hole is already very pink and puckered. Jisung can’t help but imagine Minho alone in the shower, whimpering because his fingers or whatever he was using weren’t enough, then ultimately texting Jisung to fulfill his needs when he couldn’t satisfy himself.

“I told you,” Minho says, obviously trying to sound unbothered, “I showered.”

Jisung smirks as he presses a thumb against the hole, stretching it lightly as he pulls to the side, and Minho lets out a needy groan. ”Did you think about me in the shower?”

Minho doesn’t answer, biting his bottom lip, and when Jisung tries to catch his eyes, he looks away. Jisung turns to the nightstand and quickly grabs the lube, squeezing some directly onto Minho, making him gasp in response to the cool liquid. Without further comment, Jisung pushes his index finger inside and watches as Minho moans loudly. There’s no doubt about it. Minho has played with himself because the one finger glides in and out easily.

“Did you try and fill yourself up while thinking of me?” Jisung asks again while hooking his finger slightly, making Minho arch his back as he brushes over his prostate. “But it just wasn’t quite enough, was it?”

Minho’s eyes are closed as he stifles a moan. Rather carelessly, Jisung pulls his finger out. He can push him a bit more, right?

“Well, if you can’t even answer a simple question like that, then maybe we shouldn’t—“

”Yes, I thought about you!” Minho’s feet dump onto the mattress as he frustratedly throws his hands in the air. “Thought about you fucking me senseless! Happy?”

Jisung can do nothing but smile at that. “Very. And don’t worry, I’ll make sure to fuck you senseless.”

Harshly, he pushes Minho’s knees up again and immediately pushes two fingers in this time, since Minho is ready for it. He’s quickly got Minho pressing his lips together tight as he fucks his fingers in and out of him, almost nothing but the sound of lube squelching as Minho keeps suppressing his moans.

Jisung presses Minho’s prostate deliberately, and finally, an uncontrolled, open-mouthed moan leaves Minho.

“Can you—” Minho starts shakily after that, but closes his mouth as Jisung pushes in again. Jisung stops, giving Minho the chance to talk. “Can you turn up the music?”

Jisung raises an amused eyebrow. “Are you planning on being loud?”

“Would you rather I keep quiet?” Minho asks with raised eyebrows, like it’s the stupidest question he’s heard.

“Fuck, no.” Jisung promptly jumps off the bed, hurriedly stripping himself of his remaining clothes before going to the speaker, turning the music up loud enough to drown out any sounds coming from downstairs, and hopefully vice versa. He gets back on the bed, caging Minho between his arms and legs. “Loud enough?”

“I guess, we’ll find out.” Minho pulls Jisung down, kissing him hard, and then the next moment, he throws Jisung off of him to the side, switching their places, reminding Jisung just how strong he is. Minho straddles him, their cocks brushing against each other as he leans down. He catches Jisung’s lower lip between his teeth, letting it slip as he pulls back and looks Jisung in the eyes. “I'm gonna ride you.”

The words send shivers down Jisung’s spine, and he swallows. “Be my guest.”

Minho sits up again and reaches for more lube. He groans as he slicks up Jisung’s cock, looking at it hungrily, then he brushes a thumb over the tip and looks up at Jisung as he applies pressure right on the slit. Jisung gasps, his stomach flipping at the slight threat, but then the pressure is off again. Minho is such a fucking tease. Jisung far from hates it.

Minho gets up, high on his knees as he positions himself right above Jisung’s cock, which he’s got in a tight grip. Then he lowers himself. The head of Jisung’s cock pops inside him with a firm downward push, and Minho grimaces with a moan, but despite looking like he’s in slight pain, he doesn’t slow down, melting down all around Jisung, taking him in without hesitation. Jisung once again wonders if Minho likes it like that. Not being quite fully stretched before taking him.

Jisung has been holding his breath through it all, too entranced by Minho and the sweet pressure around his cock. He lets out a loud moan when Minho stops, unable to get any further, all full.

Minho’s right hand lands firmly on the tattooless side of Jisung’s chest as he catches himself, keeping from falling over. “Fuck.”

Jisung slides his hands up the sides of Minho’s body, helping to hold him up as he breathes heavily above him. “‘You good?”

Minho nods, taking a deep breath. “Yeah. Now stop being all worried about me as if I don’t know how to take cock.”

Jisung chuckles at the remark, but then says, “I’ve got a theory.”

Minho tilts his head. “A theory?”

“I think you like the pain. At least a little bit.”

Minho huffs through his nose. “So what if I do? You’ve got a problem with that?”

Jisung pulls Minho down into a kiss, pulling his hair tight as he does so. Minho gasps. ”Not the least bit,” Jisung says before letting go of Minho’s hair again. “Now, giddy-up.” It’s definitely on his list of top 10 worst things he’s said in bed, but what can he say? Minho brings out that side in him.

Unsurprisingly, Minho lets out an annoyed groan. ”Please, stop talking.”

He makes sure that Jisung can’t get another word out after that as he straightens up and does a single quick jump, effectively rendering Jisung speechless. He keeps going after that, his movements gradually get bigger, pulling up higher before encasing Jisung completely again, jumping on him, using him like his own personal fuck toy, all the while letting out the most lewd sounds as he’s being split in two.

Minho is—as always—ridiculously hot. He’s moaning on top of him, his thighs flexing under Jisung’s palms every time he pushes himself up before releasing on the way down.

He shows no sign of needing any breaks as he keeps on going relentlessly, his chest muscles bouncing with every jump. Jisung looks down at where they’re connected, and it’s no sight for any holy gods with the way Minho’s cock and balls bounce in front of where he’s repeatedly swallowing and pushing him out.

Jisung pushes upwards on Minho’s next descent, and it draws out such a lewd moan from Minho that electricity shoots down through Jisung’s body. He needs more. He keeps meeting Minho on the way down after that, thrusting up into him, and Minho begins unraveling on top of him as he begins to lose control of his own motion, not able to keep up with the higher impact.

In a split second’s decision, Jisung pulls an unsteady Minho off of him and positions him on his hands and knees. He pushes inside of him again without any hesitation, and Minho is immediately back to moaning. He’s not able to stay up on his hands for long as Jisung fucks him, hands on his hips pulling in as he pushes forward, and Minho drops helplessly onto his elbows. He quickly succumbs to the soft surface beneath him completely, his face squished down against the mattress.

“F-fuck,” Minho breathes shakily and clutches the duvet underneath him, nails digging into the fabric.

“Too much?” Jisung asks without slowing down, giving another firm thrust.

Minho whines, and Jisung almost considers giving Minho the chance to answer, but then, with another whine, Minho breathes, “More.”

Minho lets out a surprised gasp as Jisung pulls him up by the arms. He holds him steady like that, Minho’s body hovering over the mattress as he fucks him hard. Minho has no chance of being quiet, no mattress to muffle his moans.

He begins whimpering with the thrusts, but he doesn’t tell Jisung to stop even once. His sounds drive Jisung insane, and it makes him push harder, just to hear more and worse from Minho.

The new position does it for Minho, and with a loud ‘fuck’ and a long string of moans he drips repeatedly onto the bed, soiling the sheets under him.

It’s the biggest shame that Jisung can’t see his face as he comes.

Without warning, he pulls out and flips Minho onto his back. Minho is limp in his hands, letting him do exactly what he wants without any objections as he bends him in half to hoist his legs over his shoulders, before pusing inside once more. He catches himself on his hands, leaning over Minho as far as can. He gets to see Minho’s face up close like this, looking right down at him. Gets to see just how affected Minho is as he jolts violently with every thrust and whimpers in response, his eyes scrunched closed.

He looks beautifully fucked out as he begins to struggle more and more with the oversensitivity, but Jisung isn’t done with him yet. Minho wanted to be fucked senseless, so Jisung has no intentions of stopping as long as he can keep himself going. He won’t accept any complaints.

”Look at me, baby.”

Minho opens his eyes, and, fuck, they’re glazed over, shining in the light—wet. It’s too much. Minho looks on the brink of tears from being overstimulated, a permanent frown on his face from trying to hold it together, his jaw hanging slack, and a constant stream of shaky moans leaving his lips.

Jisung can’t hold back anymore, even though he would love to drag it out even longer, but then Minho comes again, spilling a second round onto his stomach, and Jisung lets go of himself, filling Minho up with cum until there is nothing left for him to give.

As soon as he’s got enough control of himself, he drops down onto his elbows and catches Minho’s lips with his own. He feels nails against his skin as Minho grabs him by the shoulders, digging his fingers into him as he eagerly kisses him back, still hungry and needy for a moment longer. Out of breath and satiated, their lips part, sweaty foreheads leaning against each other.

Jisung is exhausted—in the very best way, his heart pounding hard through his chest from giving his all. Judging by Minho’s heavy panting, he’s feeling much the same.

“You’re getting kind of heavy,” Minho says after another few breaths.

Jisung scrambles back onto his knees, immediately pulling out. Perhaps it’s a little bit too quickly, because Minho groans loudly as he does so, and the corner of Jisung’s mouth twitches into a smile. As per usual, he grabs the box of tissues that’s readily available on the nightstand and hands it to Minho after taking a few for himself.

But now what? Does Minho expect him to leave now that they’re done?

Jisung picks up his underwear from the floor where they landed in a hurry and quickly pulls them on, before leaning down to grab his phone from his pants. He checks the time. He could still make it for movie night, they probably haven’t even started yet, always taking forever to decide on what to watch, maybe he—

“Did you eat yet? I’m in the mood for chicken.”

Jisung whips his head around, watching Minho sit up on the edge of the bed with a groan from the effort, before grabbing his phone and typing fast. Did Minho just ask him to stay?

“And a beer,” Minho adds with another tap of his thumb on the screen before putting the phone down and turning his head to look at Jisung. “I ordered half yangnyeom, half soy. It’ll be here in 20 minutes.”

Jisung blinks, dumbfounded.

Minho cocks an eyebrow as he stretches his still very naked body with another groan, hands reaching toward the ceiling. “Unless you have somewhere else you need to be?”

Jisung shakes his head. “Chicken sounds good. Beer too.”

Jisung takes a sip of beer, washing down a bite of fried chicken. Minho does the same where he’s sitting opposite him, his back against the bed.

He doesn’t mind that they are sitting on the floor, it’s more convenient than having to juggle greasy chicken and beer on a bouncy mattress, and sitting downstairs with everybody else hardly felt like an option.

They haven’t said much to each other after Minho ordered them dinner. Minho went to clean up, and when he came back from the bathroom, Jisung went. When he returned, the food was already there, and Minho was sitting on the floor, waiting for Jisung to take a seat against the wall.

He takes another bite, glancing at Minho. Eating in silence doesn’t normally bother him, and it doesn’t really bother him now either, it’s just that he still doesn’t quite get Minho.

”The chicken is good,” Jisung says, trying to fill the silence.

Minho nods. “I always liked this place,” he answers, waving a yangnyeom-coated drumstick in the air. “They make great chicken.”

Jisung hums in agreement. That they can agree on. Then it’s silent again, aside from the sound of them chewing. Again, it’s not that the silence is uncomfortable per se, but he should try and make an effort, shouldn’t he? Something suddenly springs to mind, and with a new burst of confidence, he says, “I think it's safe to say that you like the tattoo.”

Minho gives him an unimpressed look. “And what makes you think that?” he says, but his cool exterior is not fooling Jisung this time.

“Oh well, maybe the way you looked like you were gonna eat me after you saw it the first time? And every moment after that.”

Minho shrugs a shoulder, but he can’t hide the pink that appears on the tips of his ears. “Jury’s still out, might have to see it again.”

Jisung snorts. “Nothing but a piece of meat, am I? At least buy a guy dinner first.”

“Didn't I just do that?” Minho says, looking slightly offended. “I might have done it backwards, but I've still got manners.”

Jisung can’t help but laugh because Minho did just do that. “Thanks for that, by the way.”

Minho nods. “It’s the least I could do, making you come all the way here.”

“And come I did,” Jisung says, taking a big bite of chicken with a pleased smile. Minho shakes his head, but Jisung is pretty sure he sees an amused expression behind the disapproval.

“I saw you, by the way,” Minho says when he’s done shaking his head.

Jisung stops mid-chew, tilting his head as he mumbles through the food, “Saw me?”

”Rapping. One of the guys showed a clip of Chan at the party with you,” Minho elaborates before taking another bite himself.

“Oh.” Jisung nods and resumes his chewing, but the silence that follows while Minho has his mouth full feels deafening. His pulse is suddenly hammering in his ears, his thoughts racing. Did you like it? Was I good?

Minho finally swallows. “It was pretty cool. I don’t listen to a lot of rap, so I'm not really qualified to judge it, but even I could tell that you're talented.”

Jisung's cheeks feel heated. Getting compliments from Minho isn’t exactly something he’s used to. And Minho just called him talented. Well, maybe not specifically him, there were three of them performing, after all. “Thank you,” he quickly replies, but immediately fills his mouth again before he can say something stupid, like asking which parts Minho liked the most.

Jisung gives the chicken his full attention after that, letting the silence be while happily ignoring the way his pulse was behaving just a moment ago, washing it down with beer.

“Here.”

Jisung lowers his beer, only to be met with what appears to be the last piece of chicken hovering in front of his face. “Oh, you can have it!” he says automatically, but the drumstick doesn’t disappear, and when he looks directly at Minho, it doesn’t look like it will anytime soon, so he quickly takes the offering with a thankful nod.

Minho doesn’t say anything, just quietly sips his beer while Jisung eats the last piece.

“You never told me your favorite anime,” Jisung says after finishing, spending the time while chewing to come up with something to say, and anime seems to be the one thing they have in common aside from Felix.

Minho blinks. “You never asked.”

“Well, I’m asking now.”

“Janggu,” Minho says without taking even a second to think.

“Janggu? Crayon Shin-Chan?” Jisung asks, furrowing his eyebrows. “As in, the cheeky 5-year-old who keeps on mooning to upset adults?” Clarification really isn’t needed, everyone and their mothers know Janggu, but that answer isn’t even in the top 20 of what he’d expected Minho to say. Of course, there's always the chance that Minho is just fucking with him.

Minho hums affirmatively without any sign of being ashamed by his answer. “It’s funny.”

Jisung chuckles, deciding that Minho must be serious, and who is he to judge if that is the case? “Can’t argue with that. I haven’t watched it in ages, though! Do you want to watch?”

“No!” Minho’s eyes are wide, looking like Jisung suggested they jump off a bridge.

Jisung clams shut. Shit. Clearly, it’s a bad idea to suggest that they hang out for longer. Why did he even do that? This must be his cue to leave.

But then Minho visibly relaxes, shaking his head while rubbing his neck. “Sorry, I’m just not in the mood for that. But we could watch something else?”

Or maybe Minho genuinely wants him to stay? Jisung perks up, a sudden thought. “Do you like horror movies?”

Jisung is watching through spread fingers from the bed, barely able to make out what’s happening on the TV half of the time.

“I thought you liked horror movies?” Minho asks from beside him.

“I do!” Jisung says, looking at Minho chuckling. “But that doesn’t mean I’m immune to jump scares, and you won’t catch me watching them alone. Plus, it’s been a while since I last watched one, since Felix doesn’t like them.”

No, he definitely isn’t immune. The next one’s got him actually jumping, making him take cover behind Minho even though there isn’t much space. Minho laughs again, utterly unaffected, but then leans forward, making more room for Jisung to get in behind him—or so Jisung thought. Minho stretches his arms and gets down to lie sideways on the bed, head propped up on an elbow, leaving Jisung with nothing to hide behind.

Jisung tries his best under the new conditions, but it doesn’t take long before he decides that he’s not feeling safe like that, and he copies Minho, lying down right behind him, with the option of ducking his head safely behind Minho’s.

”Can you even see a thing?” Minho asks, trying to look behind him.

“Maybe,” Jisung mutters.

Then the main protagonist does exactly what she shouldn’t be, walking into the dark hallway alone, and without thinking, Jisung grabs Minho’s shoulder, clutching it while burying his face in the crook of Minho’s neck.

He can feel Minho laugh again, his body rumbling with the movement. “You can look. Literally nothing is happening.”

“I’m good,” Jisung answers, not ready to trust Minho.

When he hears the music change to something less sinister, he shifts to lift his head, but immediately stops as his nose brushes over Minho’s skin on an inhale.

Minho doesn’t smell like Felix—of honey and comfort—but he smells good. Always has. Jisung lingers, brushing the tip of his nose across Minho’s neck repeatedly, trying to figure out what exactly it is he smells of, his full bottom lip beginning to brush with it as if it can help taste the smell. It’s slightly musky for sure, dried up sweat after them fucking intensifying it. Jisung’s pulse rises at the thought of how Minho looked on top of him not long ago, and then underneath him. He inhales again. And then there’s…vanilla. It’s subtly there, leading Jisung to thoughts of a sweet dessert to be devoured.

Suddenly, he feels pressure against him below, Minho pushing his ass back. Jisung’s cock reacts to the pressure, twitching inside his pants. He freezes. It might not have been an intentional move from Minho, just him readjusting his position. Unsure what to do, Jisung does nothing at all, awkwardly frozen in place with his nose pressed flat against Minho. But then Minho stretches his neck, leaving it open and bare, and Jisung can’t see what that is if not an invitation.

Pulse rising further, he slides his lips across the smooth skin before leaving a slow, open-mouthed kiss right in the crook of Minho’s neck. A faint groan from Minho tells him to continue, so he does, leaving more kisses and then teasing with small licks, taking in the salty taste of sweat with his enticing scent. Minho pushes his ass back again, repeatedly rolling his hips slowly, and Jisung’s cock fills up, pressing between Minho’s asscheeks through the too many layers of fabric of both their pants.

Jisung’s teeth lightly catch skin, and Minho lets out a louder moan. In a sudden hurry, Minho reaches behind him, pulling down his sweats and underwear enough to expose his ass, and Jisung can’t pull his own down fast enough to let his cock press against him naked.

Jisung is fully hard, enjoying the friction of sliding between Minho’s asscheeks, but it doesn’t go on for long before Minho pulls away. In a hurry again, he stretches for the lube on the nightstand before pushing his ass back again as he hands the lube to Jisung behind him without a word. Words have never been needed less.

Jisung immediately uncaps the bottle and covers two fingers with lube, letting them take the place of his cock. Minho pushes against them, and the fingers slide inside without much resistance, since it wasn’t long ago that he was filled up with something much bigger. He quickly pulls out his fingers again, deciding that they aren’t needed, and with the addition of more lube, he pushes his cock inside with a shared moan.

It’s a tighter squeeze with the way Minho’s thighs are still together, his sweatpants keeping them from opening much where they hold them in place, but Minho moans beautifully as he fills him up, arching his back as he pushes back to feel even more. Jisung fucks him like that, with one hand on Minho’s waist to keep him steady, while Minho moans pathetically, fighting to keep himself from rolling over with every thrust, holding his hand hard against the mattress.

Deciding to let him, Jisung pulls out before giving him a push on the back. Minho surrenders to the soft surface, getting on his stomach, breathing heavily as he looks back at Jisung. He doesn’t make any move to pull down his sweats any further, just biting his bottom lip as he watches Jisung hurriedly remove his own pants. The look in Minho’s eyes is enough to rile him up even further, so leaving Minho’s pants on, he immediately straddles his thighs, pulling his asscheeks apart enough to thrust inside again with Minho’s legs still trapped.

The side of Minho’s face is squished flat, his cock pressed against the mattress as Jisung fucks him hard, and judging by the moans coming from him, he’s enjoying every bit of it. It’s going to be a quick fuck, hurried and desperate, pearls of sweat already appearing on Jisung’s forehead from not holding back. He leans down closer, his chest against Minho’s back as he’s propped up on one elbow to keep his full weight off of him.

Minho clutches the sheets, knuckles turning white as his moans turn into higher-pitched whines. Jisung grabs the back of his hand, fingers sliding in between each other, holding on tight. He’s already so close, but so is Minho, he knows.

“Come for me, baby.”

Almost instantly, Minho stutters out a high moan, their fingers squeezing even tighter together, and Jisung effortlessly releases with him, filling him up for the second time that night.

Out of breath, Jisung places a soft kiss on Minho’s shoulder before dropping his sweaty forehead against him while they calm down.

Minho stretches his fingers, freeing Jisung from his grip, and Jisung hurriedly removes his hand. “I really need to change my sheets,” Minho mumbles, his voice strained from the added weight on top of him. “Good thing I didn't do it yet.”

Jisung chuckles as he pulls out, getting up to let Minho breathe properly before he ends up crushing him. “It's almost as if you anticipated another round,” Jisung notes and collapses beside him, exhausted and satiated. A loud scream from the TV reminds him of what they were in the middle of doing, but he really couldn’t care less.

Minho reaches for the remote and pauses the movie before rolling onto his back, lying limply halfway on top of Jisung, arm spread out across him. He turns his head, his face close enough to be slightly out of focus when Jisung looks at him. “Maybe I did, maybe I didn't. You may never know.”

Jisung chuckles again, shaking his head. They lie like that for the next few minutes, breathing in tandem as they calm down further.

“Did you talk to Felix about us doing this while he’s gone?” Jisung asks when the thought appears.

“Of course I did,” Minho answers, unconcerned, but then he narrows his eyes at Jisung. “Are you telling me you didn’t?”

”No! I did! I wouldn’t wanna hurt him like that.”

“Good.” Minho nods firmly, happy with the answer, and turns his head to stare at the ceiling.

Jisung's arm is slowly getting numb under Minho's weight, but he can't make himself care. Maybe he likes the awkward position and its accompanied closeness.

"You called me baby again,” Minho says without looking.

Jisung blinks a few times. "I did,” he simply answers.

Minho hums, and Jisung can't tell whether he approves or not. Maybe it’s better not to ask. Another moment passes before Minho relieves Jisung of his weight, allowing full blood flow to his arm as he lies beside him instead.

With a dissatisfied groan, Minho pulls a grimace. “I just rolled onto my own cum again.”

Jisung snorts loudly. “I'd say I'm sorry, but I'm really not at this point.”

“Fair,” Minho says with a shrug, then gives a questioning look. “So, should I change the sheets this time or—?”

Jisung laughs, shaking his head in disbelief.

Fucking insatiable.

Jisung squeezes, his fingers digging into soft skin where his hand is resting on Minho’s waist. He slept surprisingly well, probably the best since Felix left. Jisung smiles. Soon. Soon, Felix will be back. Just a few more days till Sunday.

He feels Minho’s hand slide down to his ass, giving it a good squeeze in return, but before Jisung can respond to that, there’s a firm knocking on the door.

Minho groans and rolls away, jumping out of bed to carefully open the door just enough to peek out.

“Let me just put on some pants,” Minho says, his voice raspy from sleep and annoyingly sexy like that. He turns around, looking at Jisung as he reaches for the nearest pair of sweats, hanging on the chair by his desk. “I’ll be back in a minute. Frat stuff,” he shortly explains as he pulls them on, before proceeding to look for a shirt.

Jisung nods. He looks to the door Minho left cracked, still not able to see who interrupted them, but then he hears him clearly. “Hi, Jisung!”

Jisung’s ears immediately redden. “Hi, Eunwoo,” he yells back before burying his face in the duvet.

Eunwoo chuckles but doesn’t say anything else. When Jisung looks again, Minho is pulling the door open after throwing on a hoodie.

”You walk well,” Jisung hears Eunwoo say as Minho walks past him.

Jisung’s stomach swoops. He’s sure that he knows what that comment is referring to. There’s no doubt that Eunwoo heard a thing or two through their shared wall.

”Thanks, I learned it from my mom,” is the last thing Minho says before the door closes behind them.

Jisung sits up with a jolt.

His mom.

He looks at the nightstand, then to the door, and back again. He shouldn’t, but he really, really wants to. He fights the urge for a moment longer, eyes flickering back and forth, but before he knows it, he’s opening the top drawer of the nightstand.

He deflates. The picture isn’t there, but without a second’s thought, he opens the next drawer. His heart jumps. There it is. Almost shaking, he picks up the framed picture of a woman with a child in her lap.

He studies their faces, the familiar eyes, and the smile he’s seen on a few rare occasions. There’s no way that isn’t Minho. And the woman is without a doubt related to him.

“What are you doing?”

Jisung fumbles with the frame in his hands, close to dropping it for a second. He’d been so deep in thought, he didn’t even hear the door. How long had he been staring at the picture?

He swallows, feeling uneasy under Minho’s stare from where he’s standing in the doorway. Judging by his expression, he wasn’t asking out of curiosity, and Jisung is sure Minho already knows exactly what he was looking at.

No point in denying it, he shows Minho the picture. “Is this your mom?”

Minho gives it a silent look and then calmly turns to close the door, much to Jisung’s surprise. With a sigh, he walks over, taking the picture frame from Jisung’s hand before dumping himself down beside him on the edge of the bed. Jisung instinctively holds his breath as he watches Minho just stare at it for a while, afraid to disturb whatever is happening inside of him.

Then Minho sighs again. “Yeah. It is.”

Jisung exhales, heart pounding as he dares to quietly ask another question, “What happened?”

He thinks that Minho might not even have heard him, not reacting at all at first, but then, with his eyes fixed on the picture, he says, “She was in an accident. Gone from one moment to the next.”

Jisung’s insides twist. He had a feeling that something bad must have happened, but hearing it from Minho still pulls at his heartstrings.

“Mom and Dad showed up at the orphanage about a week later. My mom—” he says, nodding at the picture, “she’d put Dad’s info on my birth certificate, and somehow they found him. Well, they found his parents in Australia, and they told the services that he’d moved here years ago. He had no idea I existed. He wanted to do a paternity test to make sure I was his, but Mom—Felix’s mom—immediately said no to that, that there was no way she would risk leaving me there, all alone without family if a test said I didn't belong with them. She always told me that no matter what any tests might say, I belonged with them. That’s how I got a new home and a new family overnight. I didn’t really understand it at first. These two people, coming there, offering me a home. Suddenly, I had my own room in a house like none I’d ever lived in before. And then there was Felix.”

Minho pauses, a slight tug at the corner of his lips, before continuing.

“The things I’ve pieced together are that my mom went on vacation to Australia and met our dad, had some kind of whirlwind romance, and when she returned to Korea, she got back together with her boyfriend from before. Dad told me he tried to contact her, but her boyfriend picked up. He never tried again after that. Anyway, she ended up raising me on her own because her boyfriend left her. Apparently, he was shitty like that after she told him she would keep me. And I guess her parents didn’t approve either. She kept saying that we didn’t need anybody else as long as we had each other. I don’t blame her for not telling him about me. I assume she must have tried to contact him at some point, but as far as she knew, he lived in Australia, and he met Felix's mom not long after, so if she tried to look him up, I see why she might've been discouraged.”

Jisung blinks, one significant thing registering. “So, there’s a chance you and Felix aren’t related at all?”

“Your guess is as good as mine,” Minho says with a lift of one shoulder. “I have no idea what the guy who left my mom looks like, and me and Lix both overwhelmingly look like our moms.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Minho turns to look at him. “Why? Does it make you feel less of a freak for being with us?”

“I—” Does he? “But if you’re not, then you could be together!” he points out, putting his own feelings aside.

Minho scoffs, rolling his eyes. “What? We’ll just show up at the next family gathering hand in hand?”

“But—”

“Jisung, think about it for a second. It wouldn’t change a thing.”

Jisung’s shoulders drop. Minho is right, of course. “But don’t you want to know? For sure?”

Minho sighs with a shake of his head before looking Jisung straight in the eyes. “If you could choose between potentially finding out that you’re related to the person you love and want to be with or choose not to know anything for certain at all, what would you choose? Think about it yourself; would you rather know that Felix and I are related by blood, or that we only call the same people Mom and Dad because we grew up together?”

“I—” Jisung shuts his mouth, looking down when he can’t find any words. People believe what they want to believe. Minho does that too. It’s quiet for a while before he lifts his head again. “Why did you break up with him? Back then, when we started college?”

Minho cocks an eyebrow. “I think the answer to that is pretty obvious.”

Jisung nods with a hum. “Then why did you want to get back together?”

“I think the answer to that is pretty obvious, too,” Minho answers calmly, but his eyes exude a sadness Jisung hasn’t seen before.

He nods again. The very obvious answer is clear in his mind as he thinks of Felix and all the things he makes him feel. He can’t find it in him to blame Minho if he feels even half of all that.

“I never didn’t want to be with him after it all started,” Minho adds. “But I wished I didn’t, so, so many times. And I wished he didn’t either.”

“Seeing us kiss back then must have been hard,” Jisung says, still vividly remembering Minho’s reaction at the party about two months ago. And how he felt himself, seeing the two of them.

“You have no idea.”

“I actually kind of do,” Jisung says with a chuckle.

Minho lets out a brief chuckle himself, before looking down at the picture in his hands again.

“I'm sorry about your mom.”

Minho gives him a quick smile. “Thanks.”

He puts the picture frame safely into the drawer again, then falls back onto the bed, stretching his arms with a groan and revealing a bit of his stomach underneath the hoodie. Jisung watches him stretch his body for a few moments more before he gets up on his elbows. His eyes drop to Jisung’s upper body, perhaps trying to get another glance at the tattoo, and Jisung feels naked under his stare, which he technically is safe for his underwear. He barely gets the chance to think about getting dressed before Minho gives him a once-over, raising an eyebrow.

“Want to get even?”

“Even?” Jisung asks, perplexed. What do they have to get even about?

“You left me feeling quite sore, you know. Caught a few questioning looks downstairs,” Minho says, nodding toward the door.

Jisung can’t fight a smirk. “I mean, you did explicitly ask for it.”

His smirk quickly disappears when Minho sits up again, looking him intensely in the eyes from only a few inches away and with a low voice says, “It’s a simple yes or no, Jisung-ah.”

Jisung swallows. He doesn't need another second to decide.

It's tempting to stay in bed, exhausted after a second round of Minho getting back at him, pounding him mercilessly into the mattress. Not that he’s complaining at all, on the contrary, but it’s almost 2 p.m. and Changbin won’t forgive him for bailing on him two days in a row because of Minho.

So, slightly regretful, he sits up, stretching his arms as he looks behind him at the other person in the bed. “I need to get going. Changbin won’t be happy if I cancel on him again.

Minho looks up at him with a sudden alert eye, face half-buried in his pillow. “Again? You canceled on him yesterday to come here?”

“Maybe,” Jisung answers with a lift of one shoulder and a tug at the corner of his lips he can’t hold back.

Minho looks pleased at the answer and does a big stretch of his whole body with a content smile on his face before curling in on himself under the duvet, his eyes sliding shut.

Chuckling to himself, Jisung gets up to get dressed. He’s in the middle of pulling on his pants when his eyes land on a framed picture of Soonie, Doongie, and Dori on the wall. Minho’s beloved cats. He looks back at Minho, looking all peaceful. Soft Minho, who brought home abandoned kittens, giving them a warm home just like he himself was offered when he was all alone in the world.

Minho unexpectedly pops an eye open, as if he knew he was being watched. “What?” he grumbles.

Jisung shakes his head and proceeds to pull up his pants fully. “Nothing. Was just thinking that you remind me a bit of a cat.”

Minho perks up, lifting his head high. “You should know that I take that as a great compliment.”

Jisung chuckles. “I do not doubt that.”

When he’s ready and dressed, he checks the time again. He’s definitely going to be late. Slightly stressed, he hurriedly approaches the bed. He leans down, catching Minho’s lips with his own without invitation, humming as he kisses him for a beat or two. “Talk to you later.”

Then he quickly gets up again and slips out the door. It’s only after he’s hurried down the stairs and closed the front door behind him that he freezes.

Since when do they kiss each other goodbye?

His shower takes longer than planned, too many thoughts in his head, the brief sight of Minho’s surprised face after it happened becoming clearer the more he thinks about it. And just like that, he’s back to feeling awkward about Minho.

Why? Just why did he kiss Minho goodbye? People in a fake relationship don’t kiss each other ‘goodbye’. Fucking is one thing, but kissing someone ‘goodbye’ implies more than just a mutually beneficial agreement.

They—he and Minho—don’t kiss ‘goodbye’. They don’t kiss ’hi’, and they sure as hell don’t ever kiss ‘goodnight’. There is exactly one circumstance where they kiss: sex.

Kissing equals fucking, and fucking equals kissing. But that’s absolutely it. They don’t kiss just to kiss.

Ever.

Now, Minho probably thinks he’s into him or something. Which he absolutely is not.

He groans and turns off the water, once again quickly getting dressed, and then he heads for Changbin’s favorite place: the gym.

He quickly spots Changbin when he enters, already busy working the lat machine, doing pull downs. Jisung is not surprised that he started without him, having given a heads-up by text when he realized how late he’d be.

“Sorry, had to take a shower,” Jisung says, slightly out of breath after trying to catch up, rushing on his way there.

Changbin gives him a curious look, eyes squinting. “And here I was of the impression that people shower after working out.”

“Trust me,” Jisung says, “you wouldn’t have wanted to be near me before.”

Changbin lifts his eyebrows higher than high at that. “You were still at Minho’s before coming?”

“Yeah.”

Changbin breaks into a mischievous smile, and Jisung already feels a sigh working its way through his body. “So, I take it, it was nothing but one long fuck fest?”

Jisung sighs heavily. The way Changbin says things sometimes….

“Bro, the fact that you’re not even trying to deny it!” Changbin laughs. “Next, you’re gonna tell me you’re not going to work out because you’re too sore.”

“Now that you mention it…” Jisung says and stretches his body from side to side, grimacing when he feels just how used his whole body feels. “But I’ll stay here to spot you!” he hurriedly assures Changbin, not intending to bail on him. “And for emotional support. Your own personal cheerleader. Goooo Changbin!” He jumps, waving a pair of invisible pompoms in the air, and immediately earns a surge of pain from his enthusiasm. Way too sore.

Changbin shakes his head, but there’s a smile on his lips. “Buy me coffee after, and I won’t feel completely betrayed.”

“Deal!”

Jisung wasn’t kidding when he said he’ll support Changbin, perhaps purposely overdoing his cheers of encouragement a little—seated, because his body refuses much else—but Changbin doesn’t seem to mind the over the top cheers one bit (that self-satisfied sweat junkie).

“Here you go! One caramel latte, extra foamy,” Jisung says as he puts the steaming coffee in front of Changbin before sitting down on the other side of the table with his own cup.

“How can you still drink Iced Americano when it’s this cold outside?” Changbin asks, skeptically eyeing the drink in front of Jisung.

“It’s not cold in here, is it?” Jisung says, before taking a sip through the straw, very much enjoying the cold drink because it's not cold at all inside the campus café.

Changbin shakes his head. “You're hopeless.”

“Tell me something I don’t know,” Jisung says, playfully lifting his eyebrows twice.

Changbin snorts and directs his attention to his own coffee, which Jisung notes he can’t yet drink because it’s way too hot. Much smarter with the Iced Americano.

“So, Felix is gonna be home the day after tomorrow,” Changbin says as he puts down the warm mug. “How are you feeling?”

Jisung automatically breaks into a wide smile. How can he even begin to express how he’s feeling about that? Tingling through his whole body whenever he thinks about him returning? About to burst with excitement at the thought of seeing him with his own two eyes again? Incredible warmth just thinking about holding him in his arms? He takes a sip of coffee and puts it down calmly, as if his pulse isn’t racing like crazy at the question. “Pretty excited.”

Changbin snorts, then gives him a warm look, as if he knows there's more to it than those two words. “I can imagine. Let’s hang out the four of us again soon? Hyunjin’s been asking about Felix too.”

“Definitely!” That’s got Jisung nodding excitedly—they always have fun, the four of them. He will, of course, be taking his time just being alone with Felix first, though.

Changbin smiles and tries another sip of the hot liquid. He quickly puts the mug down again, looking thoughtful. “I still don’t really get it, though,” he says, eyebrows pulled together as he looks at Jisung. “You’re super into Felix, but fucking Minho like there’s no tomorrow.”

Jisung pops the straw out of his mouth, swallowing a mouthful of coffee. “There's not much to get,” he answers earnestly, shrugging his shoulders. What is there to get? It is what it is. They have fun, it’s not like it’s actually serious. Then he scrunches his nose, remembering what happened just a few hours earlier. “I fucked up today, though.”

Changbin looks at him concerned. “How so?”

Jisung’s head drops low as he quietly says, “I kissed Minho before I left.”

“So?” Changbin says, not looking the least bit impressed. “Haven’t you kissed plenty of times before?”

“Yes, when we fuck! But not to say ‘goodbye’,” Jisung points out, fidgeting with the plastic cup on the table. “That’s not— That’s—”

“Boyfriend territory,” Changbin interrupts him when he catches on, wiggling his eyebrows at Jisung in a way he does not particularly like the implication of.

“That’s not what I meant!” Jisung immediately defends himself, squeezing the cup a little too tightly. It obviously wasn’t what he meant. Except, maybe, on some faraway level it was.

“What else did you do?” Changbin asks, ignoring Jisung’s outburst.

Jisung’s hands relax, the question disarming him for a moment, and he retracts them, drying the condensed water from the cup onto his pants. “What do you mean ‘what else’?”

“Besides fucking,” Changbin says like it’s nothing. “You were there for a while, and I’m assuming you had to have some breaks. I know your stamina isn’t that good.”

“Minho bought dinner, and we watched a movie,” he mumbles out quickly, hoping to sound as unbothered as he very clearly feels, not even able to feel offended by the blow to his stamina.

Changbin snorts loudly. “You know what that sounds like? Something boyfriends would do.”

Jisung throws his head back with a groan, hands sliding down his face. “Oh my god, please shut up.”

“You’ve got feelings,” Changbin tauntingly sings, and Jisung hates every single syllable with a passion.

“I do not!” he immediately shuts Changbin down, hoping to convey just how much he does not with a very stern look. “And neither does Minho. We’re not like that. We don’t actually like each other! It’s just convenient, that's all.”

Changbin cocks an eyebrow. “You literally make zero sense, you know that? Anyway, what’s gonna happen when Felix comes home?”

Jisung raises an eyebrow. “Things will continue like before?”

“Uh-huh. And you’re still cool with that?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

Changbin huffs, shaking his head, but whatever more he has to say on the matter, he keeps to himself, and instead takes a long sip. They sit in silence for a moment, but with Changbin, silence never tends to last long. “Hey, did you find out anything about that picture while you were there?”

Jisung freezes mid-drink. Minho’s mom. Can he tell him, or is that too private? It’s not exactly his story to share. Jisung shakes his head. “Totally got it all wrong! I had another look, and it’s not his mom.”

“Ah, too bad,” Changbin says and chuckles. “I started hoping I could be a little less freaked out by all this.” He then shrugs his shoulders. “Well, I guess I’m getting used to it anyhow. Brotherfucker.”

What's gonna happen when Felix comes home? He hadn't really thought about that. He and Minho certainly won’t be hanging out on their own anymore, there’s absolutely no reason to. No, Felix will be right there between them as he should. Minho will be all over Felix, no doubt about that. But so will he.

He lets out a longing sigh. He can’t wait to just be able to hug Felix again. And cuddle. Cuddle with him all night, and not just sleep alone, while thinking of him, wishing he were there with him.

Unless Felix’s feelings have changed after being away for so long.

What if he comes back, and he finds out that he didn’t really miss Jisung much at all?

Jisung’s stomach sinks. Now that would be devastating.

He’s sure of one thing, though. He’s gonna be straight with Felix about seeing Minho. As soon as Felix calls, he’ll tell him whatever he wants to know.

Felix’s call comes sooner rather than later, which is a relief. Jisung’s been at the dorm all evening, watching anime while waiting for it. Despite Felix telling him he’s okay with whatever he and Minho might be up to in his absence, he can’t help but feel a little anxious about telling him about it. But it’s a must.

He grabs his phone, still eagerly answering the call to hear Felix’s voice. “Hi Felix!”

“Hi, Jisungie!” Felix exclaims in return, sounding happy as always, making Jisung feel all warm inside. He can clearly imagine the way Felix’s eyes crease at the corners when he smiles. “How is everything?”

“I hung out with Minho again,” Jisung blurts out. Oops. He didn’t mean to open with that.

“Mhm,” Felix hums at the other end. “Hyung told me.”

Jisung’s stomach twists. Of course, Minho did. Should he have told him quicker, too? “And you’re still okay with it?” he asks, feeling a little apprehensive.

“I’m jealous,” Felix says plainly, but then with a smile to his voice adds, “but happy.”

Jisung lets out a sigh of relief and chuckles. “I see why that might be the case. I’m jealous too, you know.”

“Jealous of what?”

“Of everyone who got to hang out with you for the past three weeks,” Jisung answers, and Felix giggles cutely in response. “I need Sunday to come faster.”

“Me too. You’ll be there?”

“I’ll be in the parking lot waiting all day if I have to.”

Felix snorts. “Please don’t do that. You’ll freeze your ass off! And I like your ass way too much for that. Just be there around 10? I’ll keep you updated when exactly I’ll be there.”

“Can’t wait.”

It’s finally the day.

Jisung didn’t sleep much last night, way too excited that Felix would be home tomorrow, which is now very much today.

The whole day he’s been restless beyond anything he’s tried before, and now, when Felix is not much more than an hour away, he’s paying the price for his lack of sleep. He’s nodding off again when he promptly hammers his hand on his desk, waking himself up, sitting up straight in the chair. He shakes his head, blinking his eyes awake. It’s no use. He can’t fall asleep before Felix gets here.

He looks out the window into the dark. It’s still quite cold, but that will only help keep him awake. His mind quickly made up, he gets up and pulls on a hoodie and his padded jacket, before venturing out toward the parking lot where he saw Felix off three weeks ago.

At the parking lot, he walks in circles for a bit before eventually sitting down on a bench, deeming the risk of him falling asleep in the cold non-existent.

He briefly checks the digits on his phone for the nth time and pulls his jacket a little bit tighter around himself. It’s still early.

“They’re delayed.”

Jisung looks up, not surprised to see the person in front of him. Of course, Minho is waiting for Felix, too. “How do you—” Jisung starts, standing up to be level with Minho, but then his phone buzzes in his hand, and he sees the preview of a text, telling him that the bus from the airport is delayed. Felix texted Minho first. He sits back down on the bench with a thud. He’s got nowhere else to be tonight.

“Pabo, you’ll freeze your ass off. Come on,” Minho says, jerking his head to follow him.

Jisung snorts. The Lees are certainly concerned about the well-being of his ass. But with nothing to lose, he follows, and yes, his ass is beginning to feel slightly cold, so there’s that. Plus, Minho would probably insist on it anyway if he tried to resist.

They don’t get very far before Jisung sees where they’re headed, spotting Minho’s familiar blue car.

Minho goes straight for the right side door to the backseat and opens it, gesturing for Jisung to get inside. “Hurry, before all the warmth goes out.”

Jisung gets in, but he doesn’t get the chance to get comfortable before Minho is ushering him further inside, getting in beside him. Minho pulls the door shut as soon as his ass is safe inside, even though Jisung has barely moved to the middle of the back seat, squishing them together.

“Mind moving a little bit more over?” Minho asks, and Jisung quickly scoots to the other side.

“Why are we sitting in the back?”

“So,” Minho starts and leans forward to the front, reaching for something in the driver’s seat, “we can share this.” He sits back down, pulling a black blanket with white paws printed on it with him. Cute.

“You could just turn on the heat, you know,” Jisung says.

“Waste of resources. Do you not think about the environment?” Minho gives him a deadpan look like Jisung is the sole person responsible for not turning global warming around.

“Uh—”

Minho huffs. “Relax. It just hasn’t been working properly lately. The blanket and body heat are our best chances of survival.” He spreads out the blanket, scooting closer until their shoulders bump against each other so it can cover both of them.

“Thanks,” Jisung says as he turns his head, looking right into Minho’s blinking eyes. His eyes flicker to Minho’s lips, and he is reminded of his blunder the day before yesterday with a swoop of his stomach. He quickly turns away, glad that his ears are already red from the cold outside, and starts to needlessly flatten the folds in the blanket where it’s covering his thighs.

“Mind if I put on some music?” Minho then asks.

“It’s your car,” Jisung throws out nonchalantly, not looking at him this time.

“A simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’ is really not your forte, is it?” Minho says, but doesn’t wait for a response before he puts on some low R’n’B.

A lot of things aren’t his forte when it comes to Minho, but he isn’t about to point that out.

Minho is quietly tapping on his phone beside him when, in the silence aside from the music, Jisung’s lack of sleep catches up with him again, and he yawns.

“You can nap,” Minho says. “I’ll wake you up.”

Jisung shakes his head. “I’m really not that tired.”

He feels the shrug of Minho’s shoulder against his. “Suit yourself.”

“Jisung.”

Jisung lets out a faint groan. His body is tired, so, so tired, and his eyelids are so heavy there’s no way they are opening, but someone is shaking him, trying to wake him up. Does he really have to?

“The bus is here.”

Jisung’s eyes pop open. With a jolt, he lifts his head from where it was resting on Minho’s shoulder, uncharmingly inhaling a bit of drool. But he can’t care about being charming right now because the bus is here. Felix is here.

Wordlessly, they hurry out of the car, half-running to the curb at the other end of the parking lot, where a few other people are waiting for the late arrival.

Butterflies flutter around inside Jisung when the door opens, and he searches for Felix’s face among the many people exiting the bus. Suddenly, the butterflies freeze, and then they explode into double the amount. There he is. Looking as lovely as ever.

As soon as Felix spots them, he’s running toward them, and without hesitation, he jumps forward, catching both of them with an arm each, pulling them into a joint hug. Jisung reciprocates the hug with his right arm, the other arm trapped between himself and Minho.

“I missed you both so much,” Felix says, his voice full of joy, and Jisung’s butterflies show no sign of calming down. Felix doesn’t let go of them for a good long while, swaying them a bit from side to side, and Jisung will happily let Felix hug them for as long as he would ever like. Then Felix suddenly pulls back, looking at them worried. “I hope you didn’t get too cold while waiting. It’s freezing out here!”

“Nothing to worry about,” Minho answers, smiling. “But we should get you back to the dorms before you start getting cold.”

Felix nods. “Let me just get my suitcase.”

“I’ll get it,” Minho says, already on his way to the open trunk of the bus, where people are pulling out their luggage. Jisung feels a slight regret at not being the one to give the offer.

Felix’s head then falls heavily onto Jisung’s shoulder with a yawn. “I’m so damn tired, I could sleep for a week! I can’t believe classes start tomorrow already.”

Right, classes tomorrow. He’d happily ignored that in favor of being excited about Felix’s return. Jisung puts an arm around Felix again and squeezes. “Let’s get you to bed as fast as possible.”

Minho soon joins them with Felix’s suitcase in tow, and they head straight for the dorms after Felix runs to quickly hug a few people from the bus. Minho, of course, insists on carrying the suitcase the whole way to their room, not accepting any help.

“Thank you, hyung,” Felix says after Minho puts it down, parking it in front of his closet. He barely gets to straighten up before Felix embraces him, and Minho sighs, closing his eyes as he hugs Felix tight.

Jisung’s stomach swoops, wings fluttering. Maybe they are related, maybe they are not. It doesn’t matter anymore.

Minho squeezes Felix once more, then releases him from his arms and gently catches both of his cheeks in his hands. He places a soft kiss on Felix’s forehead and leans his own against it.

Jisung looks away, letting them have their intimate moment away from his watchful eyes, and hurriedly picks up a shirt from the floor, folding it messily in his hands. Why is his heart beating so loudly?

“See you tomorrow, hyung,” he hears Felix say softly.

Minho hums. “See you tomorrow, Lixie.” There’s the sound of another kiss, a longer one this time, Jisung thinks, then Minho says, “Jisung?”

Jisung lifts his head, abandoning the pointless folding of the shirt, to see what Minho could possibly want from him now that Felix is back.

“Uhm— Goodnight.” It happens so fast, Jisung doesn’t get the chance to react before Minho has already pecked him on the corner of his mouth, and then, after another quick peck on Felix’s lips, he says, “Sleep tight.” Then he is out the door, closing it behind him.

Jisung is baffled, blinking in confusion, but the confusion doesn’t get to last long because the next moment, Felix leaps toward him, catching him in a warm embrace and tilting them over onto his bed.

Jisung squeezes him, burying his nose in the crook of his neck, taking in that familiar and calming scent he’s missed so badly.

“I missed you,” Felix mumbles into his shoulder, taking the words out of Jisung’s mouth. Before Jisung can answer, Felix lifts his head, hovering over him, and Jisung feels breathless, looking up into the eyes he missed even more.

“I missed you too,” Jisung breathes out, and then Felix closes the distance between them, his soft lips meeting Jisung’s. It feels like home and being on fire at the same time, his heart beating out of his chest.

It doesn’t take much before something begins to stir down below, but they are both tired, he knows that, and it’s not sex he’s craving the most.

“Can we sleep?” Felix asks as if he knew what he was just thinking.

Jisung nods. “As long as I get to hold you.”

Felix squints his eyes at him threateningly. “Don’t you dare not to.”

Jisung giggles. “You should be more afraid, I’ll never let go again.”

Felix seems more than content with that and immediately snuggles in close. “That’s a risk I’m willing to take,” he mumbles. “And hope for.”

Jisung laughs again, then says, “We should go brush our teeth before we fall asleep.”

Felix shakes his head. “I’ll brush my teeth twice in the morning. I’m way too comfortable, there’s no way I’m moving.”

“Not even to get rid of your clothes and get cozy under the duvet?” Jisung suggests, hoping Felix might just have the energy for that, or let him help him.

“Okay, a little bit of moving!” Needing no more encouragement, Felix pulls back from on top of Jisung and jumps up, stripping down to his underwear in record time.

Chuckling at the sudden eagerness to move, Jisung gets up to join. Felix is back in bed, about to get cozy under the duvet, when he gasps loudly, startling Jisung.

“What? What happened?” Jisung asks bewildered, dropping the shirt he just pulled off.

With a jaw that looks like it would drop all the way to the floor if it could, Felix points at Jisung’s chest.

Jisung looks down himself and smiles when he realizes what Felix is on about. “Oh right, surprise!”

“Is it real?” Felix asks with wide eyes glued to the tattoo.

Jisung nods. “Yep.”

“Can I touch it?”

Jisung can’t help but chuckle at the hopeful expression on Felix’s face, eyes sparkling. “Of course. Just be careful. It’s not completely healed yet.” He kneels down on the bed so Felix can get a better look and ghost a very careful finger over the ink. “Do you like it?”

“It’s so,” Felix says and takes a deep breath, “—sexy. If I wasn’t so tired…”

“And we didn’t have to be up so early…” Jisung reminds him.

“That too.” Felix drops his hand and locks eyes with Jisung, giving him a stern look. “Han Jisung, you are too sexy. I should banish you to your own bed for being so tempting!”

There’s a huge smile on Jisung’s face. “I could go if you—”

Felix grabs his arm, firmly keeping him from going anywhere, and kisses him. “Don’t you dare!“ he says sternly while looking Jisung directly in the eyes. “I thought we already established that! Now come here.”

Giggling, Jisung lets himself be led by Felix, getting under the duvet with him. Half-naked, they lie entwined, Felix with a leg draped over Jisung.

Jisung brushes a strand of hair away from Felix’s face as he takes him in again, eyes wandering from freckle to freckle as he maps any new additions the sun might have given him.

“How soon will you get tired of hearing me say ‘I missed you’?” Jisung asks while brushing his thumb across Felix’s freckled cheek.

“Never,” Felix answers promptly, smiling endearingly. It’s only natural that Jisung can’t help but smile, too.

“I missed you.”

Felix is quick with his answer again and pecks him on the lips. “I missed you.”

Their lips meet again in a soft kiss, lazily getting to know each other again after being apart for too long. It’s everything Jisung dreamed of and more, warmth filling him up from his head to his toes.

When they stop, Felix snuggles in close. Jisung takes a deep breath and pulls him in tighter. He’s never been more sure that there’s no other place he’d rather be.

It’s the weekend, so of course there’s a party. And just like more often than not, it’s at his hyung’s frat.

A crowded house, full of drunk people, music blasting, and drinking games being played all around. It’s lots of fun. He knows several of the people at this point and is friendly with plenty of them. His only regret is that it makes it easier for Minho to hide from him in the crowd. But at least he’s here.

It’s already been well more than a month since he got what he wanted the most. Since then, there has been no more. Minho has had plenty of excuses as to why he couldn’t visit him the next time he asked, or the next one after that. But for Minho’s own birthday? Felix had to insist, and there was no way Minho could deny him that. It was tradition, after all.

Of course, they’ve had their video calls like usual on Monday nights, but with not even the slightest acknowledgement of what happened from Minho.

Felix had honestly been a little disappointed that Minho didn’t mention it, just acting like it never happened, even though it so clearly did. And they both enjoyed it.

But he didn’t want to push him during their calls. Not too soon, at least. But tonight it is his hyung’s birthday, and since he himself got such a great birthday gift from Minho, why wouldn’t he want to give one equally great back?

If only he can make Minho admit how much he still wants it.

“Time for shots, birthday boy!”

Felix looks over his shoulder when he hears Eunwoo. At the oppsite side of the room, Eunwoo is swinging a big bottle in one hand, shaking it in front of Minho’s face. Minho puts his hands up defensively, trying to refuse the offer, but when a drunk Eunwoo won’t take no for an answer, he lets him pour him one anyway.

Felix snorts when Minho empties the glass in a nearby plant, while Eunwoo is busy downing his own.

Before Minho can notice that he’s been looking, Felix quickly looks away again, turning his attention back to Yugyeom in front of him, who is busy telling him all about why he never should’ve chosen to major in computer science.

Minho has been distant ever since he arrived, but not in a cold way. More in a “hey, you should talk to ‘insert name’” kind of way, making him talk to one person after another. Which, in theory, is fine. He’s come a long way thanks to all the parties here at the frat breaking him out of his shell, getting rid of his old insecure and shy self. But the only person he really wants to talk to tonight is his hyung.

That Minho isn’t drinking tonight isn’t much of a surprise. He’s noticed it all night, and he can easily guess why. They will be sharing Minho’s double bed tonight, the same bed they shared last time he was visiting.

Seeing Minho fake-drinking all night is only a good sign. It means that Minho has a reason not to want to be drunk around him. And it’s not because he's afraid Felix might try something—he would never ever force him to do anything. No, Minho must be afraid of what he himself might do if he isn’t clearheaded around him. What he might allow to happen. So that only proves the point that Minho wants it. Wants him.

Right?

Felix has his own reasons as to why he isn’t drinking tonight. He needs alcohol not to be an excuse for Minho to push him away. No reason for Minho to think he might be taking advantage of him. So he’s as sober as can be for the first time at one of these parties.

That first kiss more than a year ago felt like finding a missing piece. An explanation as to why no one else ever seemed interesting at all, why Minho is the only one he truly seeks. Of course, he tried to ignore it after it happened, shocked by his own actions, but the feeling inside him only kept growing. The want for more. Was it really necessary to fight it when he was so sure he wasn’t alone with these feelings?

And after that first night only little more than a month ago… he knew right away that once would never be enough. How could it possibly be?

Felix’s stomach flips as he glances at the window behind Yugyeom. There in the glass, he can see Minho’s reflection (pretend) sipping a beer, and if Felix isn’t mistaken, Minho is looking in his direction.

Now is the time to show Minho that he is doing fine.

Yugyeom is straight as an arrow, but that way he won’t be unnecessarily leading anyone on. Because there is only one person he really wants. And that person currently keeps looking his way.

Felix brings up a hand, dusts off Yugyeom’s shoulder with a gentle brush to remove a piece of lint that isn’t there. “Sorry, you have something— Wow, have you been working out?” Felix asks with wide eyes, squeezing Yugyeom’s upper arm.

Is it a low blow for him to try to make Minho jealous? Possibly. But how else can he make him see what he really wants? And if it truly doesn’t bother Minho—if he truly doesn’t care that he’s flirting with every other guy—then he’s not hurting him anyway. So where’s the harm? He’s just trying to push Minho’s buttons. The buttons that he is so sure are there. And if they’re not? If Minho continues like it’s nothing? Then that’s an answer too.

But he knows that Minho felt it. Felt the electricity between them when their skin touched. When their lips brushed. When he was inside him.

Just the thought of it makes the hair on Felix’s arms rise.

Yugyeom smiles widely. “Oh yeah, been to the gym with Chan lately.”

“I can really tell!” Felix puts on thickly, giving another squeeze where there is definitely some muscle definition, but maybe not as much as his reaction warrants. He slides his hand down along it and glances at the window again, but Minho isn’t looking anymore.

“I need to head to the bathroom,” Yugyeom says. “Be back in a bit.”

“Sure,” Felix says, nodding. “Actually, I’ll follow. I need to check that my phone is done charging.”

Yugyeom slips through the crowd toward the hallway, and Felix follows close behind. Yugyeom leads them up the stairs, knowing that the line is probably way shorter upstairs, then goes straight for the bathroom, and Felix continues a little further to enter Minho’s room.

As soon as he’s inside, he deflates and sits down on the edge of Minho’s bed with a deep sigh. He didn’t come to check his phone, he just needed a break. It’s harder than he expected. So much harder to be this close to Minho. They have to talk about it at some point, don’t they? Because this? This is not humane.

But how? How—

“Yugyeom is straight.”

Startled by the voice, Felix jumps up from the bed and sees Minho close the door behind him. His heart threatens to explode out of his chest, so suddenly in Minho’s presence. But why is Minho—

His brain short circuits for a moment. Minho followed him.

“Oh, really?” Felix says innocently, hiding a smirk on the inside as confidence overtakes him. “Are you sure?”

Minho nods just once. “Trust me.”

A surge of jealousy courses through Felix. Why is Minho so sure? Did he try? No. No need for those kinds of thoughts. He bats his eyelashes at Minho. “Have you been watching me, hyung?”

“Why did you go up here?” Minho asks, blatantly ignoring the question.

Felix only has to think for a second. “To get your birthday present, hyung.”

Minho sighs, but his eyes are soft and kind. “I told you not to spend your money on me.”

“What if—” Felix says as he steps closer and with shaky hands opens the top button of his shirt. “It won’t cost me a thing?”

”Felix…” Minho sounds so disappointed, but now is finally their chance to talk. And if this won’t make him talk, then nothing will.

He stops right in front of Minho, but when Minho’s disappointed expression doesn’t change and he instead looks away, Felix drops his hands, his eyes growing wide and begging.

“Hyung…”

Felix stops himself. No. That’s the wrong impression. He shouldn’t be begging. He takes a deep breath then slowly opens another button, revealing a bit more skin.

Minho looks up as he quickly grabs his wrist, stopping him from opening yet another one, and Felix gasps loudly.

He feels like a kid caught doing something he shouldn’t. And maybe he shouldn’t, but it only makes his heart beat faster, his pulse feeling so prominent under Minho’s hand. He bets Minho can feel it too, the way it rises, blood pumping rapidly through the veins of his wrist.

Minho looks at where he’s holding Felix, squeezes a little bit tighter for a split second. Then Minho says what Felix knew he’d say sooner or later, “You’re drunk.”

Felix can’t help but snort at that. “I promise I didn’t have a single drop, hyung.” He waits for Minho’s response after that, but when none comes, Felix bites his bottom lip. “Now, about Yugyeom—”

“I hate seeing you with other people,” Minho says curtly as soon as the name passes Felix’s lips.

Bingo. Felix could literally jump with joy. “Yeah?” he says and steps even closer, close enough to feel Minho’s heavy breath on his face. “What are you gonna do about it?”

Was that too much? Too risky?

With a great deal of strength, he closes his eyes. If he doesn’t, he won’t be able to hold back. He’s made his intentions perfectly clear, and he needs Minho to take that one last step. He needs Minho to want this. To want him.

He feels Minho loosen his grip, gently lowering Felix’s hand to his side. Then fingertips travel up his arm, and his mouth falls open with a low gasp at the soft touch. His heart is beating out of his chest again. He knows Minho is still fighting it. But why? Why does he insist on making this so hard? Felix groans on the inside. Yes, he knows why. But fuck the why. He couldn’t care less about the why.

“We really shouldn’t,” Minho whispers, so low Felix barely hears it.

Felix then dares to open his eyes, staring deeply into Minho’s. “But we already did.”

Time stands still, Minho frozen, and Felix doesn’t know how to unfreeze him, too afraid of ruining this moment. So he holds his breath, tries not to show how close he is to breaking down if Minho doesn’t do something soon. If he doesn’t—

Then Minho takes that last step. Takes his lips hostage with a soft eagerness that Felix can do nothing else but reciprocate.

It’s Minho. His hyung. This is it. He might as well just die. There’s nothing higher than this.

Minho cups his face, pulling him even closer as they kiss, and Felix throws his arms around his neck, holding on tight. Minho’s hands slide down to his waist and to his ass. With a pull, he makes Felix jump, catching him and letting him wrap his legs around him.

So close. They are so close.

“Hyung,” Felix breathes in between kisses, barely pausing long enough to get the words out. “Want to give you your present. Need you in my mouth.”

Minho pulls back, blinking, his parted and puckered lips shining with spit. Felix can feel his chest press against him with every heavy breath. With a nod, Minho releases him slowly, letting Felix put his feet back down on the ground.

Not asking for more permission, Felix slides all the way down onto his knees. When he looks straight ahead, his cock twitches. Right there, in front of him, is a clear bulge in Minho’s jeans. With a shaky breath, he glides his hands up Minho’s thighs, and his fingers find the button of the jeans.

He is, of course, horribly inexperienced compared to Minho, he knows that. But there was no way of getting experienced after he realized he wanted no one else but him, that no one else was an option. Not that he didn’t try for a while, but it just made zero sense, and he could never get into it. With Minho, though, everything made sense. Every touch of his hands, every whisper of love, every kiss. How could anyone ever beat that? How could he possibly find anything more?

The button pops out, and he gently grabs the zipper. Slowly, he pulls it down. He doesn’t look up at Minho, his nerves already all over the place. He hears him, though. Hears him gasp when he grabs Minho through his underwear. He hears him again when the tips of his fingers find the top of his underwear, and he carefully pulls them down, unwrapping the present in front of him.

Minho’s cock springs free, and Felix swallows. He carefully grabs it, barely able to circle it with his small hands. He gives it a few slow strokes, listening to Minho’s heavy breathing. This is it. He takes one last nervous breath, then sticks out his tongue. He licks across the already glistening head, getting that first taste of something salty on his tongue. Precum.

Minho’s moan from above gives him the confidence to do it again, and he soon swirls his tongue all around the head to more moans. He wraps his lips around the head and sucks, just the tip to begin with, bathing it in saliva, before slowly taking more and more of him in his mouth.

He starts bopping his head back and forth, keeping his lips tight so Minho can feel it all.

Minho’s hips twitch with a strained groan, and out of the corners of his eyes, Felix sees Minho’s fingers fold into fists. He wishes Minho wouldn’t hold back, that Minho would just let go and fuck his throat like he is so clearly fighting to do. But if Minho won’t, then he can do it for him.

He goes deeper this time, taking as much of Minho’s cock as he possibly can. He can’t take it all, he knows that, but he’s sure as hell going to try anyway.

He gags on Minho’s cock, just like he’s seen them do in porn movies, taking it so deep his eyes water. He’s been practicing with dildos plenty of times just for this. Just to be perfect for Minho.

The gagging has the desired effect on Minho, who lets out a long string of “fuckfuckfuck”. But then Minho grabs him by the hair, making him stop completely, and firmly says, “No.”

He pulls Felix off of him, and Felix looks up at him confused as he feels him release the grip on his hair. “Did I— Am I not doing well?”

Minho smiles warmly, and it removes some of the anxious feeling inside of Felix. “You are doing so well, so perfect, my Lixie,” he says, holding his head gently by the chin and brushing a thumb across his cheek. “But this is not what I want.”

Felix’s stomach sinks, and his eyes immediately tear up, but not from gagging this time. Minho really doesn’t want him.

“Why are you sad?” Minho asks, quickly putting his cock back into his underwear before getting down on his knees in front of Felix. He catches a stray tear underneath Felix’s eyes.

Felix sniffles, inhaling shakily. “You don’t want me.”

“Felix…” Minho shakes his head with a sigh. “I want you so bad it hurts. But not like this. Not with you so far away.”

He pulls Felix up from the floor with him, backing up to sit on the bed, and guides Felix into his lap, having him straddle him. One thumb wipes across Felix’s damp cheek again.

“My beautiful Lixie.” Minho kisses him again, and yes, they were way too far away from each other.

They kiss softly, so soft it makes Felix long for more, but at the same time, kissing Minho like this feels like too much, like he's about to burst and tear up all over again. Looking for more, for something to ground him, he pushes his hips forward to get closer, and they both moan. Minho’s hands quickly find his ass, and he pulls him against him repeatedly, the sweet friction making Felix burn with want. The kisses aren’t soft anymore but eager, searching for more, teeth biting at lips, tongues tasting anything and everything.

“What do you—” Minho starts, but Felix interrupts him before he can finish the question he knew was coming, just like last time.

“Everything, hyung. Always everything with you.”

Minho kisses him again, and then he pushes two fingers into Felix’s mouth. Felix sucks them, covering them in saliva, before Minho pulls them out again. Felix feels his hand slide down the back of his pants, and then the wet fingers press against his hole.

Felix grinds against him, his body aching with want for the other. He clutches Minho in his arms, burying his face in the crook of Minho’s neck as he tries to contain himself, but he’s completely unable to slow down his grinding that only keeps increasing. Then the tip of one finger dips inside, and it’s all over for him.

Minho pushes the finger inside a little further, and Felix moans loudly over his shoulder, his nails digging into Minho’s back as he comes in his pants.

He goes still, letting out a low whimper. He couldn’t hold back. Even though he really, really tried.

Minho stops too, pulling out the finger. “Did you come?” he asks, and a warm hand caresses Felix’s back.

Felix whimpers again as he nods into Minho’s neck, pressing his closed eyes against the soft skin. He will not cry. He will not.

“My beautiful Lixie,” Minho says softly, pushing his cheek against Felix lovingly. “Let me see you.”

Reluctantly, Felix lifts his head. He knows his face must be completely flushed, red from coming and red-hot from embarrassment for coming so soon. But when he looks at Minho, he’s met with nothing but loving eyes and a smile from Minho.

“So beautiful,” Minho says and brushes hair away from Felix’s face. “No need to hide from me.”

He will not cry! Fuck. Maybe he will.

“Fuck,” Minho mirrors Felix’s thoughts, wiping a stray tear away and pushing up against him, still hard. It was only Felix who came embarrassingly early. “Don’t cry.”

Felix sniffles. “I messed up,” he says, and uses the end of one sleeve to wipe under his other eye.

“You really have no idea how perfect you are.”

Felix can’t stop more tears from welling up at that, and Minho leans his forehead against his. He grinds up against him again, breathing heavily, and Felix feels his own body respond as Minho continues the motion.

“It’s okay,” Minho breathes. “Hyung will make you feel better, okay?”

Felix nods, and Minho’s lips find him again, kissing him softly while pushing up against him. The salt from his tears mixes with their saliva, but Minho doesn’t stop, clearly doesn’t care. Suddenly, he stands up, a firm grip underneath Felix’s ass keeping him in his arms until he turns around, putting Felix down on his back on the bed while their lips never stop.

Felix moans. It reminds him how much stronger Minho is. He could easily hurt him if he wanted to, but he knows Minho never would. Minho always treats him with so much love and care, no one ever able to make him feel safer than him.

Minho kisses him once more on the lips before sliding up Felix’s shirt, and Felix lifts himself briefly so it can be pulled off in one go, not bothering with any more buttons. Minho immediately begins to leave a trail of kisses down his chest to his stomach, stopping right above the hem of his pants. He pulls them down gently, peeling off the underwear to let Felix’s cock free from its sticky mess. The embarrassment hits Felix again, but Minho says nothing as he pulls them off of him completely, leaving him naked on the bed.

Minho takes him in his mouth, cleans up his cock, licking up and sucking off every bit of cum he can, his tongue covering every inch of skin. Felix feels a little bit insane, already hard again despite just coming.

“So perfect,” Minho whispers, and places a kiss on the tip of his cock before pulling back. Then he slowly pushes Felix’s legs up by the knees, exposing his asshole completely. He looks down and sighs. “So, so perfect.”

In a hurry, he gets up, pulling out lube from his drawer. Felix’s breath hitches as he watches Minho cover his fingers with lube. He lets out a moan when Minho touches him, feeling the cool lube being spread around his rim, before the tip of a finger dips inside him again. Minho slowly works him open, pushes the finger deep inside him, then carefully adds another, and Felix’s eyes roll to the back of his head.

The stretch is nothing unusual. He has fucked himself the best he could with his dildo countless times—always thinking of Minho—but now it’s real, and it makes all the difference. Minho’s fingers are inside him. And soon more of him will be.

“Hyung,” Felix whines. He needs him, needs him so bad. So bad it hurts, just like Minho said. “Need you.”

Minho pulls out his fingers, which were at least three at this point, if not more. Felix is too dizzy to know for sure.

Minho smiles and crawls forward in between Felix’s legs to catch his lips. Oh, he will never get tired of kissing Minho.

“Need you too,” Minho breathes, his gaze full of the same want Felix feels inside him. He retracts, getting off the bed to strip himself of his clothes, before lubing up his cock.

A sudden thought makes Felix turn around, getting on his hands and elbows, sticking his ass high in the air. He’s thought about Minho having him like this an endless number of times. Completely at Minho’s mercy while he fucks him roughly from behind with a tight grip on his hips. But this—they—are not just some lewd fantasy. He loves Minho like he’s never loved anyone. Never will. And he knows Minho feels the same.

He hears Minho swear from behind him, and a light slap makes his one asscheek bounce. God, he wishes Minho would do that again, but there are so many things he wishes Minho would do to him. With him.

Minho pulls at his one asscheeks, and then he makes first contact. It’s absolutely blinding when Felix feels that first push against his rim. He has to look back, just to make sure that this is really happening, that Minho is the one behind him and not just a dumb replacement of a toy. But it is Minho.

Minho’s cock slips inside, and Felix lets out a loud moan. It’s Minho inside him. His Minho-hyung.

Fully connected, Minho leans forward, and Felix’s one shoulder is covered with kisses. Minho’s lips keep contact like this as he starts fucking him slowly, rolling his hips as he thrusts forward.

Felix is still half in disbelief, but Minho’s loud breathing in his ear reminds him that it’s real. The kisses stop as Minho goes faster, unable to stay in place long enough.

“Hyung,” Felix whimpers through moans and does his best to push back against Minho. “More. Please.”

Minho straightens up and finds a tight grip on his hips. He proceeds to pull Felix towards him with every thrust, going deeper than deep, Felix’s cock helplessly bouncing underneath him. And it’s everything. Everything Felix has been yearning for.

Suddenly, his upper body is lifted off the bed as Minho pulls him up, making him arch his back.

Minho wraps an arm around his chest from behind, keeping him in place while he fucks him with hard, deliberate thrusts, aimed to make him feel as much as possible.

Felix turns his head, and their lips find each other, messily kissing.

“Love you, hyung,” Felix breathes shakily into Minho’s mouth. “Like no one else.”

Minho holds him a little tighter, thrusts a little harder. “No one else?” he asks, sounding out of breath but not slowing down.

Felix nods, eyes closing when Minho’s cocks hits him just right again. “Only you.”

“Tell me again,” Minho says.

He opens his eyes and digs his fingers into Minho’s arm. “Always only you, hyung.”

Minho groans loudly, sending shivers down Felix’s spine, and then he gives it his all. Felix’s eyes roll to the back of his head again. He knows Minho is coming with how intense his thrusts become, how loud his moans are. Desperate, Felix pushes back against him, needing Minho’s cum so deep inside him, it’ll take forever to get it all out again.

He feels Minho’s hand close around his cock, and it takes exactly two strokes before he starts spilling cum onto the sheets with every stroke.

“Only you,” Minho whispers in his ear as he milks him completely dry, and Felix’s body goes limp.

Carefully, Minho lets his upper body down, and Felix catches himself on his elbows before succumbing to the mattress, exhaustedly squishing his face into the soft surface while his asshole pulses around Minho’s cock.

“I wish you could stay inside me forever,” Felix breathes, letting Minho know exactly what is on his mind. He hears a slight chuckle.

“Me too,” Minho answers. “But right now, I need you in my arms.” Minho places a soft kiss on his back and straightens up, before doing what Felix already dreads the empty feeling of.

Minho’s cock leaves him with a whimper, but he doesn’t get the chance to feel empty at all, because Minho lies down beside him and pulls him in. Minho kisses him on the forehead before holding him tighter. They breathe as one, chests rising and falling in tandem.

Way too soon, their peaceful bubble is disturbed.

“Minho-ya, where did you go?” Eunwoo yells through the door, hammering on it. “Bam is gonna try and beat Jackson’s record!”

Minho shakes his head. “Yeah?”

“I promise you don’t wanna miss this!”

Minho snorts. “Okay, be down in a sec.”

“Alright,” Eunwoo yells with another smack against the door, followed by the sound of footsteps getting fainter.

Minho gets quiet again after that, not moving from his place, but Felix can’t fight the uneasiness inside him.

“Do you have to— Are you leaving?” Felix asks quietly, suddenly feeling smaller at the thought of whatever thing Minho can’t miss. Was this it?

But Minho just kisses him on the forehead again, squeezes him tighter. “Never.”