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Andrea narrowed her eyes on her husband. "You promise that there won't be any mistletoe this year?"

"Absolutely." When Andrea didn't move, Tex raised a hand to his heart. "Cross my heart and hope to die."

Andrea's toe began tapping. "And nothing that you pretend is mistletoe even though it's actually holly or some other plant that I've never heard of?"

Chuckling, Tex recalled Sasha's lack of amusement at being tricked into thinking she was face-to-face with mistletoe - which she was allergic to - when it was actually holly. "Nope. I already promised the Commodore that there would be no more mistletoe substitutes. Although from the way the Commodore was grinning the morning after the mistletoe debacle, it doesn't seem to have messed up their plans overly much. In fact, I might have helped the man out by giving him an excuse to leave the party early."

Her gaze moving to the ceiling, Tex could hear Andrea muttering to herself. "Jesus, Joseph and Mary, give me patience." Her eyes closed, then reopened, pinning him. "If you were in my shoes, what would you make me promise?"

"Ah, Red, you have certainly learned," Tex replied, both annoyed and impressed that his wife thought to ask. After all, it was much harder to get around a rule that you yourself imposed and Tex knew his wife well enough to realize that giving her a fake answer wouldn't be worth the hassle on the backend. Still, hard wasn't impossible and Tex did enjoy a challenge. "I, Kenneth Nolan, promise you, Andrea Nolan, that I will not do anything involving mistletoe that you would not approve of."

Andrea's eyebrows rose almost to her hairline. "You know that I have never hung mistletoe in my house, ever, right?"

"Yup."

"And I think that missile-toads are stupid."

"Double yep."

Andrea was silent for a few moments. "What are you planning, Tex?"

"At the moment, nothing." Tex grinned, hands rubbing together. "But I do enjoy a challenge."

xxxxx

Three weeks later, Andrea stood in front of Mike and Christine's house, Mike next to her smoking a cigar. "I have to hand it to Nolan, this was pretty clever. What did he call this? Boo-ing?"

"Elf-ing," Andrea corrected. "Apparently Boo-ing is for Halloween. Elf-ing is for Christmas."

"Whatever you call it," Mike continued, "Christine's never going to agree to give that skeleton back, just so you know."

Focused on the ten-foot-tall skeleton covered from head-to-toe with strands of fake mistletoe, Andrea barked a laugh. "Believe me, I've been trying to get rid of that thing for years. But you know Tex and his Halloween decorations. It's like Danny and his Barcalounger."

"How did you get him to change his mind?" Mike asked.

Andrea shook her head in amusement. "Tex promised not to do anything involving mistletoe that I wouldn't approve of. I have to hand it to the man. At the time, I couldn't think of a single mistletoe-connected activity that I would actually agree to, but he found one."

Mike chuckled this time. "Christine's probably the only other person on base who will appreciate the, um, creativity. How many days do you think before someone complains?"

"Given that it's your house?" Andrea scoffed. "You could leave the thing up until next year and nobody would say a thing."

Mike winced. "Whatever you do, don't say that in front of Christine. She might just do it."

xxxxx

A week later, Andrea pulled into her driveway, only to stop with a frown, certain that she saw a face staring at her from the darkened porch. Quickly reversing, she returned to the end of the driveway. Pulling out her cell phone to dial Tex at the same time she retrieved her pistol, Andrea turned to Liam. "Stay here for a minute, baby. Make sure to lock the doors. I'll be right back."

Liam looked up from his book, a frown wrinkling his forehead. "What's wrong, Mommy?"

Heart pounding, Andrea forced a smile. "Nothing. I just need to check something before we go inside."

She had just locked the car doors behind her when Tex answered. "Hiya, Red. I'm almost home."

"There's someone on the porch," Andrea hissed quietly. "Liam's in the car."

Dropping the phone into her pocket before Tex could answer, Andrea slipped into the garage to snap on the outdoor lights. As she swung back outside, gun raised, she stopped cold. Her porch, which was tastefully decorated in white snowflake lights and a single green wreath when she left this morning, was now covered in dozens of small, grinning elf dolls tied to every available surface, all gazing blankly at her with mocking intensity. Andrea stared at the horror-show in front of her, before she started laughing.

Retrieving her phone from her pocket, Andrea spoke. "False alarm."

"You sure, Red?" Tex didn't sound reassured. "Not like you to get jumpy."

"You'll see when you get here," Andrea explained.

Tex was quiet for a second. "ETA is two minutes."

Knowing that meant he was speeding and shouldn't be on his phone, Andrea hung up and retrieved Liam from the car. His eyes grew big as he took in the porch. "Look at our elfs, Mommy! We have more than Frankie and Mark! We need to name them! That one can be Candy and this one can be Cane and that one can be Rudolph and..."

Tuning out her son, Andrea waited until Tex arrived, pulling into the driveway with a skid of tires. But the look on his face when he climbed out of the truck was pure amusement. "I'll be damned. We got elf-ed. Who do you think did it?"

"Danny and Kara," Andrea replied, showing Tex the small card. "Although I'm guessing Danny more than Kara. Those dolls are ... creepy."

Eyes turning to her with interest, Tex observed. "This means that we can get them back."

"I know," Andrea replied, before grinning. "And this time I might just approve the use of the mistletoe hat."

Chucking, Tex leaned over to press a gentle kiss to her lips. "You, Red, are a genius."