Chapter Text
Celeste proposes that he leaves the Commonwealth. He’s done all he can for it, and he can live with being despised by some of its people. If people feel better that way, so be it. There are plenty of places that would take him in. He could go underground to the Institute or even head back to Far Harbor or Acadia, putting distance between himself and the Commonw—
“That sounds like cowardice,” Cece, formerly known as M0-09, declares.
Celeste glares from his spot standing by the bar counter. He brought his friends and allies here to discuss the future, not to be interrupted by someone who can’t stand him. They’re all scattered about in the living room of Celeste’s Sanctuary home, sitting on the couch or leaning against walls. Shaun is asleep in the house across the street under Marcy and Jun’s watchful eyes; keeping him here while a tense discussion happens is a poor idea for many reasons.
“Do you think that I want to leave?” Celeste asks, incredulous.
“No. You want to stay here, but you’re also afraid of what will happen if you do. That is why you framed it as other people’s wishes.” Cece leans backward against the front door with an expectant look aimed at Celeste.
“I would have worded it differently, but I sort of agree with what Cece’s saying,” adds Deacon, awkwardly fiddling with his bottle of Nuka-Cola. “A lot of people respect you for bringing the Institute to heel. Not everyone agrees with what you did, but... leaving won’t make the Commonwealth better. If you want to go, you need to make that decision for yourself.”
“It’ll be awfully boring without you. Besides, raiders are scared of you, and that keeps people safe. Without the Lion of One-Eleven around, who knows what might happen?” Cait agrees.
“I don’t want to be the Lion of One-Eleven. I don’t see how that’s any different from being the big scary Institute.”
“So scaring raiders is too much, but you want to go back to the Institute? The hell kind of logic is that?” asks MacCready. His arms are crossed over his chest. “What’s the point of that if you’re just gonna be the Director of the weirdos that everyone is still scared of?”
“You don’t need to be anything, Blue. Hell, can’t you just hand off being the Director to... I dunno, Dr. Binet? Or Dr. Li? They seem like people who won’t do the whole ‘random kidnapping’ thing again,” Piper offers instead.
“Folks, I think we’re losing the thread here,” Preston says, standing up from his armchair. “This isn’t about the Commonwealth or the Institute. We’re talking about Celeste. He wanted our input on what he should do next for himself.”
He squeezes the thumb of his other hand, taking a moment to think his words through. After a few seconds of silence, he continues speaking.
“I don’t want you to leave. I won’t stop you if you decide to go, but thinking about it hurts. You mean a lot to me and a whole lot of other people. I’m upset with some of the things you’ve done, but I don’t want you to think that you’re not wanted here anymore.”
Celeste’s gaze moves from Preston, to a spot on the opposite wall, to the countertop.
“I don’t know if it’s a matter of being wanted. I’m not supposed to be here. I should have died with my family.” Celeste raises his head to look at Cece. “You’re right that I’m just an echo of who I was before. I can’t do anything without my family, and I don’t want Shaun to end up like me. You—”
“If you tell me to be Shaun’s caregiver, I am going to punch you in the face.”
Cece looks livid. He’s up on his feet faster than a blink, striding across the room and pushing X6 aside to slap his palms down on the other side of the bar counter. Dogmeat barks at the suddenly aggressive gesture, and Curie grabs him by the collar before he lunges forward. Celeste doesn’t recoil when Cece leans in to stare in straight in the eye; both stand their ground with firm defiance.
“I don’t know if you noticed, but our family is dead . Mother and Father are dead. Solana and Rigel are dead. Uncle Cynthe and Dad are dead. They are not here anymore. None of them are here to tell you what to do. Everything that you’ve done since you unfroze has been your decision, under your own will. I know that you didn’t turn the Commonwealth upside-down for Shaun just because it’s what Solana would have wanted. You chose to do that because you wanted to do it. You chased down your nephew because you cared about him. You took revenge because you cared about him. And besides that, this—”
Cece gestures wildly around the room, making a few more waving motions with his hands as he tries to come up with words that he can’t think of.
“—whatever you want to call this group of people, they are clearly your family now. You aren’t alone, and you never were! They love you enough to put up with each other. Some of them can hardly stand to be in the same room with each other, and yet here they are, sitting in your living room, listening to what you have to say, because they care about you.”
“This isn’t the same. You know it isn’t the same,” Celeste retorts, curling his fingers into fists across the laminated wood. “You know the difference between friends and family. You’re the one person who knows why it’s not the same for me.”
“How can you not see this when I can?” Cece takes a step back and sighs, still staring straight at Celeste. Despite what his demeanor might suggest, he isn’t backing down; Celeste knows himself too well to misread Cece’s body language. “Let me demonstrate.”
There’s a pistol in Cece’s hand, leveled at Piper, and Celeste is over the counter before he even realizes it. The whole room explodes with noise and muffles into a dim buzz all at once as Cece’s back hits the ground and Celeste channels every ounce of anger in his body into his hand clamping down on the throat of the synth wearing his face.
“Blue, let him go before you kill him!”
Someone grabs him and lifts him with extreme ease. Celeste leans back, and realizes that it’s X6 once his brain can recall anything except a dire need to beat the shit out of Cece. Still on the floor, Cece waves off Hancock’s hand and coughs. He’s staring straight at Celeste again with a triumphant grin on his face. Celeste desperately wishes that he could kill people with his mind.
“Why would you do that?” he hisses. The tears welling up start to spill over, trailing down his face.
“Not family, my ass,” Cece says once he’s able to speak again. His voice is a bit strained, but he has never looked so self-assured before. “You might hesitate to call them family, but you would tear up the Commonwealth for them just like you did for Shaun.”
Celeste lets all of his weight fall backward as his knees give out on him. X6 lowers him to the floor carefully, one hand around his waist.
“You pointed a gun at her just to make a point?”
“It’s empty. Nothing would have happened. I’m sorry for scaring you, Piper.”
“Apology accepted,” Piper replies a little hesitantly. “Next time, warn a gal?”
“Cece, you’re a fucking asshole.” Celeste sniffs and rubs away his tears. “You really had to do that? I could have actually hurt you.”
“The point wasn’t getting across with words, was it?” asks Cece. He clears his throat again and gets back up on his feet with Hancock and Danse’s help. Celeste finds his footing with one hand on the counter and the other gripping X6’s forearm.
They stare at each other for a moment.
“Asagaos aren’t meant to be alone, but you never were. You only convinced yourself of it. Stop living in a misery of your own making. There’s no reason for you to leave.”
Cece turns and steps over the pistol still lying on the floor, heading for the front door.
“Mister Cece? Where are you going?” Codsworth warbles when he puts his hand on the doorknob.
“I’m going to check on Shaun. I think I’ve caused enough panic in one night,” replies Cece, looking over his shoulder to shoot a smile at the Mister Handy. “Good night everyone. I hope the rest of the conversation is productive.”
The door opens, the door closes. Nobody says anything; Celeste finally settles on breaking the silence.
“I can’t stand him. He’s overconfident and stubborn and too willing to risk his safety.”
“He really is a copy of you, huh?” Nick says.
Celeste can’t argue with that. He plops himself down onto the couch between Nick and Piper, putting his elbows on his knees and burying his face in his hands.
“Monsieur Celeste, might I ask a question? It seems that the distinction between ‘family’ and ‘friends’ is very significant to you and Monsieur Cece. I... I do not understand why it distresses you so that your friends have become your family,” asks Curie, her hands clasped together over her lap. “If you do not mind, could you please explain?”
“It’s not distressing. I’m just a moron.”
“Strong not understand. Human is crying because human think human is stupid?”
“I don’t think that’s what he means, big guy,” MacCready says. “But I don’t understand what’s happening either.”
“I don’t think I could explain it even if I tried. There’s all this... baggage about it. It won’t make any sense to anyone except Cece.”
“I admit that human emotions are a tricky subject for me, but I would like to hear how you feel, sir. I may not fully understand, but I believe it will help bring us closer, regardless,” adds Ada.
“There’s no harm in trying.” Danse clasps his hand over Celeste’s shoulder a little awkwardly, but Celeste appreciates the gesture regardless.
“You’ve listened to us, even if you didn’t understand everything. I think the least we can do is return the favor.”
Celeste lifts his head up to look at Preston, who smiles back at him. Every eye in the room points in Celeste’s direction, waiting for what he has to say. These people who love him, these people who he loves, who he would rip the world to shreds for just the same as he would for his mother, his father, his siblings, his uncle, his nephew. These people who followed him into bullets and fire and lasers and radiation, who carried him home when he couldn’t walk, who heard him scream from underground and chased his voice into the depths of the earth without knowing what awaited them in that darkness.
To hell with it , Celeste thinks as Dogmeat puts his chin on Celeste’s lap.
“Did I ever tell you about my dad?” he asks.