Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The low sound coming from the electric cars was almost imperceptible at high speed and the public was celebrating the last race of Formula E. Dan Ticktum was in the spotlight, as he was born in London and was competing in the last double header of the championship at home, battling for the positions he achieved with so much effort. Sérgio Sette Câmara, the Englishman's teammate, had slightly worse feelings, as he was further back, trying to get into position to win a hard-earned point in the last stage.

However, fate reserved a completely bittersweet moment for both of them. In the middle of the penultimate lap, an unexpected incident changed the course of Dan's good performance, who was in third place and managed to get close enough to the car in front to try to overtake it. It was the perfect setting for a home dispute.

But a small collision on the track caused by the second-placed driver, who got careless on the curve, made the Londoner avoid the apex so as not to collide and ruin the beautiful race he had had up to that point. Ticktum's car spun slightly and he controlled the situation so as not to leave the track. However, he was overtaken by three drivers. Anger coursed through Dan's veins quickly, leaving him panting and raising his heart rate.

The dream of his first podium in Formula E was shattered in just a few seconds and anger consumed him completely.

— Shit, shit, shit! — he yelled into the radio. — It was my race! I'm going to kick this guy's ass! He destroyed my podium at home. The podium… at home… I was so close to overtaking that bastard!

After crossing the finish line with minor damage to his car's front wing due to the collision with the second-placed car, Dan headed to the team pit with a heavy expression, carrying the weight of disappointment on his shoulders. Sérgio finished the race and asked about Ticktum's performance. The Brazilian received the answer over the radio and took a deep breath, as he knew how his teammate dealt with frustrations like that. He accompanied him to the resting room set up for them to use between race weekend activities.

The environment was simple, with a yellow sofa and a small bed that offered a refuge from exhaustion and emotions. There was also a minibar with electrolyte replacement, water and juices. Even with the comfort of the private space, Dan chose to sit on the cold floor, hugging his legs as if he could contain the storm of feelings that was plaguing him. Silent tears escaped his eyes with a mixture of disappointment and anger that was compounded by a deep sense of injustice.

Sérgio knocked on the door and entered carefully, respecting the moment of pain. The Brazilian finished in P14, gaining positions after the poor qualifying that left him in last place. Discouragement took over, but he decided to put everything aside to support his friend. The touch between Dan and the second-placed driver not only prevented the chance of getting on the podium, but also made the enchantment and passionate spirit of the competition momentarily disappear.

In the resting room, where the adrenaline of the track contrasted with human fragility, Dan sought solace for the invisible wounds that sport often inflicts on competitors. On the track, he felt like a hero in search of a podium that he couldn't reach at the end of it all — but in that intimate space, between tears and muffled sobs, he was simply a boy confronting the ineffable cruelties of destiny.

Noticing the discomfort that was making the other anxious, Sérgio decided to sit next to him, silently supporting him in an attempt to lessen the emotional burden of the race. Amidst the chaos inside Tickctum, the Brazilian's presence acted as an anchor that kept him connected to reality.

The sound of the audience cheering at the awards ceremony still reverberated around the circuit, but there, in that break room, time seemed to have slowed down. Dan raised his head and found mutual understanding in Sérgio's gaze. He inferred that the other also had a bitter outcome when crossing the finish line.

The shorter man placed his hand on Dan's shoulder and noticed the tension in his trapezius, massaging the area afterwards to calm it down. It was a reminder that, despite the setbacks, he would have the following year to fight for better results. The Londoner took a deep breath, trying to contain the emotions that were boiling inside.

Since he started working with Dan, Sérgio was concerned about how his teammate handled reactions in intense moments. Knowing the unpredictable nature of motorsport, he just wanted to ensure that the Londoner did not succumb to the weight of frustration. For the first time in the long minutes that the two were in the space apart from the hustle and bustle of the circuit, the Brazilian broke the silence.

— I'm sorry about the race, Dan. I know it wasn't your fault.

Dan, however, was still angry. The trembling body, the clenched fists and the gaze fixed on the void were indicative of an inner storm.

— I should have avoided the skid. I should have… reacted quicker — the Londoner said between sobs. — I can't believe I was so stupid.

Sérgio tried to break the barrier of frustration that enveloped his friend with kind words.

— Hey, you're an amazing driver and everyone on the team knows it. Sometimes things are out of our control. You did your best and still ended up in the scoring zone. The podium will come soon.

Dan's response came in the form of a restrained roar.

— The best I could? — he grunted. — It's not enough, Sérgio. Not when we're here to win. Not when I'm running in the town where I was born. Not when everyone looks at me as the representative of London racing. I put everything into this and everything collapsed like a house of cards.

The Brazilian sighed, understanding the intensity of feelings in the other’s heart.

— I understand your frustration. I ended the championship with half your points, but I'm still here to support you. Sometimes, no matter how prepared we are, circumstances conspire against us.

Dan looked at Sérgio, his eyes filled with a mix of pain and irritation.

— You think I don't know that? It doesn't make it any easier to accept the fact that I failed with myself, the team, and you.

— You didn't fail... — the Brazilian looked at him with compassion and opened a smile. — We are a team and we need to stick together. You know how talented and determined you are... today's race doesn't erase that.

Ticktum's instability seemed far from being appeased, but Sérgio felt that he managed to penetrate his emotional armor, causing a feeling of momentary tranquility.

The atmosphere in the break room became even more tense as the shorter man, persistent in calming Dan, continued to use words to encourage him. The Londoner felt the pressure building and reacted abruptly.

— Sérgio, you're talking too much. It's a lot for me to process right now and it's not like I depend on your help to get back on my feet — Dan spat out the words, roughly pushing the other's shoulder. The scream resounded in the room, echoing the frustration and anger.

The Brazilian, surprised by his explosive momentum, stepped back for a moment, keeping his eyes fixed on him.

— I'm only here because I care about you. I'm not trying to underestimate your ability or question your skills. On the contrary, I exalted them… — Sérgio bit his lip, frustrated at not having made any progress in trying to help him. — I just wanted you to feel better.

Dan's response came in a fit of uncontrollable fury.

(...)

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— You think you need to save me? You think I'm weak and incapable of dealing with my own shit? I don't need you or anyone else to tell me what to do! — He shook his head and let it appear that he was at his limit. — It's been some time since I've noticed your inconvenient presence and how much you fill me with stupid questions like an older brother.

— It’s not about weakness… — Sérgio looked at him and spoke calmly. — We all need support sometimes. I'm not here to save you, I'm here because I'm your friend.

— Friend? You're not my friend, idiot! You're just a teammate and I don't need anyone of the team with me right now! — the Londoner was irreducible and grabbed the collar of Sérgio's flameproof clothing, who felt afraid of him for the first time.

Dan's breathing became heavy and his movements exuded an almost feral intensity. On an irrational impulse, he took a step forward and placed Sérgio against the wall with a threatening expression. The atmosphere was charged with the electricity of barely contained anger, and then he did what, until then, would have been unthinkable: he threw a punch at the Brazilian's abdomen, leaving him completely unresponsive.

— Get out of my way! I don't want to see your kind, smiling face with the whole world — Ticktum pushed him to the door, but he stood his ground. — Go away!

— Okay. If you need anything, I'll be outside — he tried to remain calm and ignored the other's behavior. Then he took a step back and left him alone.

Dan closed the resting room door and Sérgio heard the bang as a warning not to touch the doorknob again, leaving him alone in the middle of a crisis. There was no one around as most people remained in the pit lane to celebrate the end of the championship.

The Londoner continued with emotions boiling over and the room, which had previously been a refuge for exhaustion and tears, became a space for the agony of a young man who had lost control.

The tremor in Dan's hands revealed the vulnerability that the angry outburst had exposed. Feeling the intensity of his own emotions, the Londoner let the tears escape from his eyes as an inevitable reflection of the anguish that was plaguing him. In that moment of fragility, the rest room turned into an inhospitable environment, as if the walls were moving towards him every minute.

Sérgio remained outside and waited patiently. He wanted to give his teammate a moment to process what he felt, but decided to return to the room when he heard the sobs and words of pain shouted by the other. Sérgio turned the doorknob and realized that Ticktum didn't lock the room.

— Fuck, you're not going to be alone — he closed the door behind him and approached Dan carefully. — I know this isn't the first time you've doubted yourself, but this is just proof that only those who have courage can drive those cars. Only those who are not afraid to expose themselves to the whole world have the courage to come this far. And you've arrived, so I hope you recognize your own value.

Dan's expression, once sad, changed slightly to a half smile. Sérgio sat next to him and their legs inevitably touched, as the sofa was narrow. He let his guard down little by little and became moved by his colleague's insistence on making him feel better.

— I just wanted to be happy again. Today seemed to be the perfect day to achieve my first podium in Formula E... the time, my pace, absolutely everything was incredible. I want to blast that idiot… he ruined everything.

— Don't mind this. I think there will be a punishment for his behavior during the race — Sérgio said. — I looked at the list of decisions and it looks like he will be disqualified.

— With this I would gain a position, but doesn't even put me in P3.

The Brazilian opened a comforting smile when he understood that his friend just wanted to drink champagne and celebrate. Dan's life was not very busy outside the racing environment and he lived solely for the purpose of being a driver. It was there that Sérgio saw himself in his friend, as he didn't do many things outside of his life on the track.

— Winning is important, but it’s not everything. I want you to know… I'm here for you, no matter what.

— Even after what I did? Are you sure? — He looked at the floor and paid attention to the relief of the moss green carpet in the room. Sérgio's hands returned to the Englishman's tense shoulders, easing his worries. — I feel so weird…

Dan's crying became more audible as he let his emotions flow naturally. He had resisted sadness at times up until then, but the feeling of security given by Sérgio made him understand that accepting his fragility was an important step towards reducing anger and disappointment.

— Cry as much as you want... — Sérgio got up to grab napkins and handed them to him. — Tomorrow will be a different day. Sometimes it takes courage to even show our emotions. Take a deep breath… we will get through this together, after all, my season was worse than yours.

— Don’t be so harsh. You're just unlucky...

— Thanks for the compliment, I guess — the Brazilian scratched the back of his head.

— It wasn't a compliment. You're an incredible driver… you're just unlucky.

— I understood — Sérgio laughed.

The crying gave way to softer sobs, and the tension that had previously filled the room began to dissipate. In that moment of connection and understanding, the friendship between the two drivers proved to be stronger than the adversities on and off the track.

Silence settled in the resting room after some calming words from the Brazilian. Dan, still wracked with intense emotions, acted impulsively once again, but it wasn't to push him out. The Brit, taken by the momentum, put one of his hands behind Sérgio's neck and wrapped him in a passionate kiss.

The gesture of affection defied any pre-established boundaries and put everything into perspective for both of them. The friendship and partnership, until then professional, released even more emotions on a day that had already surpassed the threshold of chaos.

Sérgio was unresponsive and remained quiet, but it didn't take long for him to shake his legs to deal with the tension that suffocated him. Dan looked at the Brazilian with the aim of getting some response, but their eyes met in shock and the unexpected change in the reality they shared.

The atmosphere, previously marked by the Brazilian's calm manner and Ticktum's expressive temperament, was replaced by electricity. Sérgio felt comfortable next to the Brit and allowed himself to experience whatever was going to happen next.

The line between the drivers became blurred and the silence gained new textures, preventing them from looking at each other once again. What if it happened one more time?

(...)

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Dan's boldness transformed the day, which until then had been discouraging for both of them, into something full of comfort and relief. They felt they could be themselves there, without judgment or criticism. While they were still facing the consequences of what had just happened, the uncertainty of what would come next hung in the air. The moment they shared, full of complex and primitive emotions, became a symbolic link between the two drivers, revealing a set of positive feelings that left them surprised.

Amid the vulnerability they were dealing with, a hug was the way they found to break the ice. Sérgio's light slaps on Dan's back calmed him briefly, but the Londoner was overcome by anguish once again.

— Don't feel like that — the Brazilian reassured him and released the hug to observe him. — Everything is fine.

The unforgiving world of motorsport, which is often very tough, seemed a much better place for them that afternoon. The moment of affection they experienced was like a glimpse of humanity in a place dominated by voracious disputes and endless pressure for results. The break room became a space of affection and support.

Sérgio placed one of his hands on Dan's leg, who clenched his jaw and took a deep breath to contain himself. The feelings awakened by the kiss mixed while the Brazilian thought about proposing something that would perhaps make his friend feel even more welcomed.

— What if we shared the room tonight? I don't know, maybe after here we can get drunk in a random pub where no one knows us and then we'll go to the hotel where I'm staying... — Sérgio made the invitation with the best of intentions, but the Londoner's emotions flared up again like embers, breaking the harmony found temporarily.

— I'm not gay, Sérgio. I don't sleep with men, although it seems like you must have done it countless times. There was a guy at the RedBull Junior Team who would have kissed you for sure — Dan got off the couch and walked back and forth.

— Yes, the academy driver was you, but this kiss only happened now, didn’t it?

— Shut up — he approached and placed his index finger on Sérgio's chest. — I don't like men.

— So why did you kiss me?

— Out of gratitude, because you always treated me well and made me feel comfortable. That doesn't make me gay, does it?

— I don't know. Look, I'm sorry — Sérgio paused to find the right words. — I didn't mean to offend you... I asked you to share a room because I thought I'd offer support. I'll understand if you need some space after what happened.

— You don't understand anything. I just want to go home and be alone. I don't need anything from you — insecurity loomed over him, encouraging an abrupt response to pull him away from what could be a fun night at the pub. — And know that I would kiss you again just to prove that I don't like men.

— Have you noticed how controversial this phrase was?

— Don't say another word, Sérgio — Dan stood in front of him, who shivered at the small distance that separated them. — What do you want from me? Why did you come back here after I kicked you out?

— I came back because I'm stupid. I came back because I don't like seeing someone nice crying without any support — the Brazilian stood up and faced him. — But I think coming back, this time, was a mistake.

— Why? — he held the other and took him to one of the walls, trapping him with the weight of his own body. — You also suffered from the results…

— Yes, but…

— You were also disappointed with the car's performance, weren't you?

— Yes, but…

— Relax — Dan kissed him once again.

The bodies clashed and Sérgio felt the other's disciplined determination. The British exercised a kind of natural control, as if preventing him from leaving. But he really didn't want to leave, because he would feel responsible if Ticktum didn't feel better.

— Calm down, Serginho — he pronounced the nickname affectionately and released him.

— You learned the pronunciation… that was cute.

— I'm not cute.

— You said you don't like men either... yet here we are — the Brazilian smiled. — And there's no point in saying otherwise, because your kiss is...

— Like this?

(...)

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Dan grabbed Sérgio by the hip and involved him in another passionate kiss, moving his hands down to the other's ass, which despite his surprise, allowed all the actions. He explored Sérgio's mouth with his tongue, but encountered resistance and had to give in to the shorter man, who changed positions with him and pressed him against the wall. Ticktum felt his own member throb beneath his flame retardant suit and he gasped.

— Is everything okay? — Sérgio stopped the kiss and noticed that the other's face had acquired a blush of embarrassment. — The door is locked.

— Fuck the door, I just want you to continue what you were doing. I don't like men, but you can change my mind... or maybe I just like you. I don't know anything else.

— I think I can say the same — the Brazilian shrugged and they continued kissing.

The Englishman opened the collar of his overalls and lowered the zipper, revealing the top part of his flame-retardant suit. The white fabric, tight to the body, showed off the curves that Sérgio had seen countless times, but never like that. Dan lowered his running gear, which fell to the floor as soon as it passed his hips. The volume of the Londoner's member, marked on his clothes, still had two more pieces of fabric as an obstacle. Then he got rid of his pants and remained in his underwear.

Sérgio stayed still, but soon he also started taking off his clothes. Dan gaped at the sight of him in his underwear. He never imagined it would happen, but he felt the urge to touch his teammate. And that's what he did.

— All right? — he asked Sérgio, who made a positive sign with one of his hands.

Ticktum placed his hands on the other's shoulder and looked down, indicating for him to sit on the couch. When he settled in, Dan took off his underwear and revealed his erect penis, leaving him unresponsive.

— It's the first time I've seen another dick besides mine so close to me.

— It's also going to be my first time — the Brit confessed to him and smiled. — You can play, if you want. It's yours.

— For someone who fought with me and kicked me out just now, you are very affectionate.

— Your fault, Serginho. Fuck! — Dan contracted all his muscles when the Brazilian touched his member, which was pulsing involuntarily.

— Didn't your family teach manners?

— No, son of a bitch — the Londoner lost his head with the back and forth that the other was doing with his hand. — That is great...

— It's simple masturbation. I don't see anything extraordinary about that.

— You made everything harder — he bit his lip. — I'll have to surpass you when it's my turn.

— I'm also excited and ready for you. Do you want to take it off? — the Brazilian got up and pulled the elastic of his own underwear, but got a slap on the hand.

— I'll do it — Dan slowly took off Sérgio's underwear and his member jumped forward, hitting the Londoner's face. — You are a shameless bastard.

— Correction: you dragged me into all of this. Oh, poor Daniel... poor thing! My dick just hit your face. Why don't you just shut up and do your job?

— I can't believe the preppy guy decided to use bad words — he laughed and grabbed the other's penis to masturbate it.

Sérgio's breathing became labored and they lost themselves in each other. Dan started sucking the Brazilian's member, who pulled his hair to dictate the rhythm. At one point, he gently forced Ticktum's mouth and made him choke. Then all the barriers that could still exist between the two fell.

— Are you sure it was your first time doing this?

— Absolute — Dan was embarrassed. — Why?

— You're so good.

— I had to be good at something, right? — he forced a laugh and was interrupted by a kiss.

— Talk less… enjoy it a little more — Sérgio advised him. — I don't know if you'll remember this tomorrow.

— Of course I'll remember. You're not the type of person who is easily forgotten... ever since you walked through that door to support me I felt like I was on a big roller coaster.

— It's funny that you mention that... I feel that way too — the Brazilian fixed his bangs and smiled. — I'm sorry, I messed up your perfect hair while you...

— Don’t say that. It's very dirty! Dan laughed. — I'm going to dig a hole and only get out when the shame is over.

— Before that, I have to repay what you just did for me...

— If you don't want to, that's fine. We can do other stuff.

— I want it — Sérgio sat down on the sofa again and turned his attention to the throbbing member in front of him. He put it in his mouth and let the taller one control the pace, stopping when Dan almost reached the limit.

— How naughty — he looked at the Brazilian, who got off the sofa and stood beside him.

— And now? — Sérgio was apprehensive.

Dan didn't respond with words, but rather with hands that pulled the other closer by the hips. The clash of bodies produced electricity and a pleasant sensation, filling the environment with uneven breathing and low moans that were perfectly audible to them.

The Londoner led Sérgio, making him lie down slowly on the bed. Then he stood over him, caressing his face.

— Get on all fours — Dan asked hoarsely, but the shorter man hesitated. — Is everything fine?

— Yes, I just think…

— Don't you want that? Alright, let's continue with what we've done so far.

— It's not that, Daniel… just don't take all your anger out on me. I've never done this, so I think it would be prudent to ask first.

Dan interrupted him with a tender, but at the same time hot, kiss. Sérgio relaxed his entire body, but his tension returned when he decided to get on all fours for him. The Londoner went to the backpack he always carried to the paddock and looked for a condom.

— You never know if your teammate is going to have sex with you — the voice trailed off between words.

— There’s no need to be afraid, Serginho. I'll make sure you feel good...

— Why do I get the feeling that you've said this countless times to other people?

— You're wrong — Dan found the condom and a small packet of lubricant, showing it to him. — Lucky for you, I'm doubly forewarned and I have both.

— Should I thank God?

— No, but I'm going to turn on some music so we don't have any problems with noise — he took out his cell phone and chose an album by The Weeknd to play at full blast. — Damn, that one makes me think a lot.

— Let's just get on with it — Sérgio shook his head, almost giving up on satisfying him. — Someone will start looking for us.

— The outside world is no longer our problem. Not now…

(...)

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Dan grabbed the other by the hips once again and brought him closer. He opened the condom package and put it on, lubricating the covered member afterwards. When he noticed that the Brazilian had relaxed with his touches, he continued. The glans didn't go in because the shorter one contracted his entire body.

— Relax, Serginho… — he asked, at the limit of the urge to have him completely to himself. — Relax, dammit!

— It's not possible, I don't know how to do this.

The British man started to masturbate him and, at the same time, he passed his glans over Sérgio's entrance, who felt more comfortable with each movement. At the right moment, Dan managed to penetrate half of his member inside his friend, who expelled all the air from his lungs.

— Let's keep it like this for now.

— Have you put everything in yet?

— Stop talking — he slapped the Brazilian's ass hard.

Sérgio contracted his entrance forcefully, making the Englishman's member throb. Dan's reaction was instinctive and he penetrated his friend with his entire member, who made a loud sound.

— Don't shout louder than the music, Serginho. All good? — he asked the other, who immediately obeyed.

— I'll never do that again — the Brazilian said through his teeth and gasped. — Damn it.

— We haven't even started yet... how can you say it will never happen again? Your ass is so hot... — the Londoner squeezed his ass tightly, leaving him embarrassed.

— Shut up, Dan. You suck at flirting.

— I'm better at putting my dick in you — Ticktum started the movement and their bodies collided a few times. — That's right... be a good boy.

— Do that again... it's good — Sérgio went crazy when he had his pleasure point caressed by the taller man's member, who obeyed the command. — Shit, Daniel… faster!

— What did I say about talking? Shut the fuck up! — Dan increased the pace, making the other moan with lust. — You're so hot.

— Only you can talk now?

— You got it right. Now face me — he took his member out of Sérgio and waited for the position to change. — I want to look at you.

The Londoner penetrated again and heard more moans of pleasure. He took the opportunity to play with the Brazilian's member, which was pulsing like never before, and also lightly massaged his testicles, leaving him ecstatic.

— You fuck like an old man — Sérgio provoked him and received a light slap on the face.

— Shut up, idiot — Dan scolded him and bent his body to return the provocation. — You'll regret what you said.

— If you slap me one more time I swear I'll repay everything you're doing to me.

— That's exactly what I want, so forgive me for slapping your preppy face one more time — Ticktum hit the side of the other's chin and increased his thrusts, leaving him in a complete trance. — You will do the same things to me and you will lose your virginity. You thought I didn't know, right?

— You fuck like an old man — Sérgio teased him and received a light slap on the face.

— Shut up, idiot — Dan scolded him and bent his body to return the provocation. — You'll regret what you said.

— If you slap me one more time I swear I'll repay everything you're doing to me.

— That's exactly what I want, so forgive me for slapping your preppy face again — Ticktum hit the side of the other's chin and increased his thrusts, leaving him in a complete trance. — You're going to do the same things to me and you're going to lose your virginity. You thought I didn't know, didn't you? It's clear that it's the first time you're having sex with someone.

— Besides everything, you still hurt my dignity.

— Don't worry about it. It's my first time too.

— Oh, is it? — Sérgio was astonished. — That's why there's so much anger accumulated inside.

— It's just that I hadn't found a bastard like you to fuck yet. But seriously... knowing that this is our first time makes everything easier, so we don't break each other's expectations.

— You’re good… very good… — Sérgio screamed with pleasure. — Damn, Daniel Ticktum!

The Londoner's pace increased to the limit, while the other contracted his entry just to irritate him. When he approached his peak, he removed his member, got rid of the condom and got close to his face to cum. The Brazilian opened his mouth and received the hot jets, swallowing everything afterwards.

— It was perfect, but now it's my turn to finish off your hot ass.

— I think I was merciful to you, so don't finish me off — Dan begged, but the shorter one didn't hear him. — Serginho, please…

— When you wanted to put everything in me I had to stay silent, so you better stay quiet — the shorter man prepared his member with the lubricant, but realized that there was no other condom.

— I have one more. It's in my wallet.

— Who puts a condom in a wallet?

— Don't you do that? I always keep one, even if I haven't done anything until now. However, the universe wanted you to use it to make me even happier.

— So are you happy yet, Dan? — he went to the object that had been left on the coffee table and took the package.

— It's your fault, Serginho. Thank you for being here and accepting this madness.

— You satisfied yourself and released some tension, but now it's my turn.

Ticktum was afraid of what was to come, but he knew the feeling would be much the same. He concluded that, if Sérgio could handle it, he could too. At least that's what he believed.

The Brazilian placed the condom on his throbbing penis and repeated the same movements as his friend, who was much more tense.

— Play with my hair. I like it when you do that, maybe it helps me relax… — Dan suggested.

Sérgio caressed the British man's messy hair and then masturbated him for a few seconds until he noticed that he had calmed down. He put him on all fours and began to penetrate him, receiving some contractions in response, which made him want to speed up the process.

— You were very kind, but you could take everything out on me — Ticktum said. — All the frustrations of the season, all the disappointing results and all the times you tried to make things work...

— I'm not going to take anything out on you. This is happening here because we want to… I don’t know, we…

— Fuck you, you're a slacker. I've never seen a driver as nice and friendly as you, it makes me nervous! — The Englishman hid the discomfort he felt because he liked having him to himself. — Your calmness makes me catch fire.

— This type of fire? — Sérgio started thrusting and grabbed Dan's shoulders, who lay down. It became easier to penetrate him, but in the position they were in, the Englishman's ass created a larger friction area, leaving the Brazilian in endless ecstasy. — You are very hot, Ticktum.

— Really? How about speeding up now? You're driving cars at over two hundred kilometers per hour, but you look like a scared nerd.

— I'm the scared nerd and you're the old man who fucks slowly.

— I think I'm going to have to cum in your mouth again so you can stay silent for a while.

— Do it then — Sérgio moved away a little and penetrated again, burying his entire member in just one quick movement, eliciting a loud moan from the other. — Are you ready?

— Do you only have this trick up your sleeve? I thought preppies fucked better than that.

— I'll end up laughing at this conversation at some point — the Brazilian smiled at him. — I also want to see your little face like a boy who spends hours in front of the mirror getting ready. And don't deny, because I've seen it.

— It's so I can look more presentable.

— You don't need that. You are beautiful.

— You're very kind, Serginho. I like to see your smile... It calms me down a lot. And you are also beautiful.

— Thanks. Do you want to continue?

— It's obvious, you need to finish the job.

Sérgio lifted the taller man's legs and penetrated with all his might. The fast pace made Dan moan non-stop, with the pleasure point being massaged by the movement of Sérgio's erect member.

With each thrust, the sound of the Brazilian's testicles colliding with the other's ass was mixed with the music. After Hours by The Weeknd was the perfect soundtrack for two boys finding each other in a difficult time. The perfect rhythm of their bodies, their curves and how much everything involved speed and cadence made everything more interesting, mitigating the obstacles they had to face over the previous months.

The Londoner ignored the pain, which disappeared when he gave himself up completely. The frustrations disappeared, as did the bad feelings. There, in that room, the two took refuge in each other.

— I'm going to... — Sérgio groaned and didn't finish the sentence, focusing on thrusting hard into the Londoner's entrance.

— Damn, Sergio! Holy shit, this is so good!

When he felt he was about to reach his peak, the shorter man took out his member and brought it to Dan's mouth, who ended up getting the first jet on his face. The rest went in his mouth.

— It was incredible — Sérgio kissed him calmly and got out of bed. — Oh my God, we have to find the team. We need to say goodbye to them.

— Not yet... let's stay here a little longer. I don't want this to end.

— It will only end if you want it to — the Brazilian winked at him, who opened a smile. — We need to get ourselves together. Want some water?

— Please. You gave me trouble — Dan took the cell phone and slapped the other's ass, who grunted.

(...)

Chapter Text

Sérgio handed him the bottle and started to get dressed. He put on his underwear, his flame-retardant clothes, his running clothes and finished with his shoes. The Londoner also got dressed, but didn't take his eyes off his cell phone. His expression changed slightly, but the shorter one didn't notice.

— Let's go? — Sérgio threw the condoms in the trash and noticed that he was visibly uncomfortable. — Hey… did something happen?

The British man brought the cell phone closer to his eyes and started reading something on the screen.

— “After a season to forget, Dan Ticktum and Sérgio Sette Câmara went from expectation to harsh reality with just 28 and 14 points achieved in the entire championship, respectively. The former RedBull Junior Team drivers faced even more challenges, with Ticktum having abrupt reactions to any event and Sette Câmara having endless technical problems that prevented him from scoring. The Brit and the Brazilian will remain on the same team next year, but, in principle, the duo's evolution shouldn't become something that surprising” — Dan read an excerpt from the article he had received and shook his head. — There’s another one: “How to take care of your temperament and mood management: ten lessons that Formula E driver Dan Ticktum taught us that might be useful for you.”

— Who posted this shit? — Sérgio sat next to him to read, but was ignored.

— I don't know... I'm just tired of it. They look like gossip portals! Damn, everyone uses big words on the radio and has reactions about everything. Am I such an uninteresting driver that this is the only way to summarize me?

— Where is the first article from? — Sérgio took his cell phone and checked the origin. — Well, it’s just any portal. The second one is from a British tabloid… it's kind of normal for them to do that. I’m sorry about this.

— Don’t feel it. I didn't want to care so much about these things, but it hurts deep down inside... you know?

Dan's confidence crumbled easily, remembering once again the harsh reality that the two had to face outside that room. The emotional trigger caused disorder in the Londoner's mind, who covered his face with his hands and began to cry.

— You're not what they say...

— I know, but that's not how things work. You understand this, right?

— Yeah, but I only spoke the truth. You are more than this “news”.

— Is this how people see me? Do you also see me this way?

— Many people like you for who you are and I'm part of this group.

— I want to be alone.

— Not this time.

— Please, Sérgio — he bit his lip and stood up. — I don't want to ruin everything like always.

— Take a deep breath — the Brazilian kissed him, but was pulled away.

— Look, that was crazy. A big piece of shit. I shouldn't have dragged you into this here, it wasn't even what you wanted.

— I really liked what we lived in this room. I liked how honest you were with me and the conversations we had. And like I said, we will get through everything together. We will deal with the car problems and we will come back stronger next year. It's a certainty.

— It can't be like this. I will hurt you at some point… that's why I haven't had sex with anyone before. You better go and forget what we experienced today. If you have any consideration for me in there, leave me alone. Please... it will be easier this way.

Sérgio saw the sadness and frustration in Dan's eyes. They were very deep-rooted feelings that made him want to push the Brazilian away so that he wouldn't be swept away by the whirlwind. The news the Englishman read fell like a big bucket of cold water on him, but the other thought about respecting the request to stay away. He managed to comfort him earlier, but felt that Ticktum would need some time to feel better.

The room, once filled with a comforting atmosphere, carried a tension that seemed to have no end. A drop of sweat ran down Sérgio's face, who was afraid of becoming a target of rejection. Backing down, at that moment, seemed illogical. However, he knew Dan well and contradicting him would only make the Londoner more upset.

— I'll stick around for another hour and then I'll go to the pub I mentioned earlier. I don't mind drinking alone, but I believed that having someone who made my year fun would make me enjoy it a little more, especially after what we've experienced here. If you change your mind, just send me a message — Sérgio picked up his backpack, left the room and closed the door, more disappointed than the first time he returned to the place. — I'm an idiot. Why did I say so many beautiful things? Damn, what if we can never have a proper conversation again? — he muttered as he walked through the paddock. The Brazilian crossed the place towards the team's garage, which at that point was still working to dismantle the structure and collect the equipment.

Dan noticed the gap that began to open between them as the shadow of insecurity seemed to sweep away any chance of them living longer than they did. Fearing losing Sérgio to something unresolved, he decided to go after him.

The Englishman put his personal belongings in his backpack and left the room running. He knew letting him go could be an irreparable mistake. It had become dark and, in the dim light of the places he passed through, he felt fear and uncertainty, but he wanted to find him and take back everything he said.

Then he remembered he could send a message. He started typing, but deleted the text when he saw Sérgio a few meters away saying goodbye to some team employees who were collecting and preparing the equipment and cars to be taken back to the base in Silverstone.

— Sergio, wait! — Dan called after him, catching his teammate before he got too far away. — I'm wrong. I’m… completely… wrong.

Sérgio stopped and turned his body to face the Londoner with a look that mixed surprise and caution. His eyes, filled with tears that fell as he said goodbye to the team that welcomed him so warmly for the season, blinked several times to ward off any new drops that might fall.

— What do you want? — the shorter one asked when he was reached.

— I just wanted to say that I was wrong. I shouldn't push you away, not when you've been so kind to me. I need your help, Sérgio. I need your help to reconnect and to deal better with all of this. Please don't leave... you're the one I want to be around. I just… I don't know what else to say. I'm sorry.

The Brazilian remained silent, watching Ticktum carefully and nodding his head for him to continue.

— I'm not good at handling my emotions, Serginho. Everything has gone so wrong in my life and that's why I feel bad when something doesn't go as expected. When I abandon a race or when someone ruins my lap I feel so easy to lose control… it consumes me. But when you're around I feel more centered. I observe your way of being and reacting to disappointments and learn a little every time. But there's one more thing... I feel so comfortable being your teammate... it's like I can be myself. You don't look at me with judgment and treat me in such a welcoming way even when I mess up... — he opened his heart to the other, who smiled discreetly.

Dan's sincere words began to dissipate the tension between them. Seeing the vulnerability behind the driver with whom he shared a garage in the championship, he began to realize the depth of the connection they shared. It was an intense connection like Ticktum and calm like him.

— You have a different way of dealing with things... you are very courageous, sincere and kind even when you use bad words. Dan, you have a heart as clean as anyone else's. Don't let other people's views distort the way you see yourself. What's in there is genuine, pleasant and does a lot of good for the people around you — he pointed to the place where the Brit's heart was. — About your reactions… I can help if you want. You just need to trust me.

— I trust you a lot. I never thanked you for being part of my life... I mean, we've known each other for years, but we only got closer this year. It seems like the garage doesn't have “separate” sides... I feel so close to you, especially with everything that happened today. I know we're different and I'm a mess, but I'm so happy that we work together and share such good times... I don't want to ruin it.

— You're not going to ruin anything, Dani.

— Dani? I liked it — he smiled. — Thanks.

— Don't forget what I told you several times today. I'm by your side and I want you to feel better.

Searching for the right words to break the momentary silence that settled between them, the Londoner fixed his gaze on Sérgio's brown orbs and mentioned the idea he had previously had.

— If you still want, we can sleep in the same room tonight. I need this and... well, I just wanted a hug.

— Only a hug? — the Brazilian wrapped him in a loving hug and they remained together for some time. — I know it's not enough to glue the pieces of a broken heart together, but like I said, I'm here for you whenever you need me. You don't have to be alone in every difficult moment. Oh, and I'll love having your company today.

After returning to their break room to change, the two walked together to the garage, where Dan said goodbye to the team's employees and thanked them for their hard work and support. Sérgio followed everything from a certain distance so he felt confident and they met again within a few minutes.

In the stillness that took place on the circuit, with the cars turned off and the public already out of the space, Dan and Sérgio found a little bit of the peace that they had longed for throughout the season. The need to disconnect from the world of speed has become imperative for them.

(...)

Chapter Text

They left the circuit and also the curves, dangers and disputes that were part of the sport. From then on, the drivers decided that they would just be two young people on vacation until the moment they returned for another season full of challenges.

— Damn, I forgot to ask the team to provide a car for me to leave — Sérgio put both hands to his forehead and emptied his lungs.

— I've got mine here. I can take you to the hotel, but first I would like to know what you are going to do in the next few days — the Londoner looked at the shorter man's confused expression, who thought for a few seconds.

— I'm going to my house in Andorra and then I think I'll spend some time in Brazil.

— Why don't you stay in London for a few days? — they reached the parking lot and Dan unlocked the car.

— Or you can go with me to Andorra — Sérgio suggested as he entered the driver's side. — Damn, sometimes I forget that the side is reversed here.

— You can drive if you want. I could put the address in the GPS, so you can orient yourself.

— No, you better do that — the Brazilian laughed as he got out of the car and swapped seats with the other. — Oh, and… well, I don’t see any problem in staying here for a few days.

— How great! Then you will check out at your hotel — Ticktum turned the key and maneuvered the vehicle, looking at Sérgio afterwards. — I want you to stay at my house.

— Don't worry about it, Dan.

— It's an invitation, but I can make it up to you with breakfast and a little more — the Londoner placed one of his hands on his member, leaving him surprised. — What do you say?

— I don't want to bother you...

— Stop it, Serginho — the Englishman smiled mischievously as they stopped at an intersection and kissed him. — It'll be nice. You told me to enjoy moments outside of sport… but I don't want to spend hours and hours in front of video games and at the gym alone. I mean, my friends have already invited me to some activities outside the house, but it's not what I want. Not now.

— You have a nice way of showing affection and a little naughtiness. I like that — Sérgio rested his head on the other's shoulder, who stopped at another intersection and held his hand.

— Will you stay?

— Only if you don't send me away again — he replied and saw a smile on the Londoner’s face.

— I promise I won't do that. I'll even cook for you!

— So I’m going to try Ticktum’s famous pasta? No… this isn't happening!

— You talked about my way of showing affection, but your excitement over silly details in life is so charming...

— I have always liked small gestures. Hey, the traffic light turned green — Sérgio pointed to the pole and laughed at the horns of the cars that were right behind them.

— A certain Brazilian’s fault… — Dan smiled. — Do you want me to go upstairs with you to help organize your bags?

— It is not necessary. You can take the opportunity to go to the market across the avenue while I sort everything out. Buy ice cream, drinks and snacks. I think we need to celebrate.

— Any special reason?

— Me… you… us, maybe. Am I going fast?

— No. Definitely not — the Brit smiled at the shorter man's response. — It seems like you read my thoughts. Yes, we have to celebrate… the season didn’t end badly, right?

— It ended so well that we had sex in a break room. God, we're kind of crazy.

— According to gossip portals, I'm a bad influence — the taller man laughed and stopped the car in front of the hotel where the other had stayed. — You've already said a lot of swear words today and took some of my chaotic energy.

— Do you know what is the remedy for a crazy person? — Sérgio unfastened his seat belt, expecting him to know the answer. — Dan Ticktum.

— But how absurd! — he elbowed the Brazilian, who burst out laughing. — The answer is a crazy and a half person, idiot.

The two got out of the car. Sérgio entered the hotel with his backpack and went straight to his room, where he placed all the objects in the suitcases he had taken to London. He took advantage of the moment alone to think about the moments he had with the Londoner in the previous hours and stopped in front of the mirror. He noticed that, despite the unpleasantness throughout the sixteen races, he still felt happy. He attributed a large part of the smile he had when remembering the post-race to one person: Dan.

Sérgio checked the room and closed the bags. Then he closed the door and called the elevator, heading to the reception when he reached the ground floor. After checking out and handing over his access card, he pushed his bags to the entrance, finding the Brit leaning against his BMW M4.

— I would kiss you right now — Ticktum smiled and helped him put his bags into the car.

— I thought about what we experienced today in the last few minutes.

— I'm listening — he started the vehicle once again and quickly looked at the other one.

— It's just that, despite the slight pain I feel in a certain place , it was really good to have lived this with you.

— It's nothing. I just wanted to say that it was really nice to have this with you.

— I would do it all again. Every detail, every movement... — Dan snorted and noticed that the simple memory made him excited. — Serginho…

— What? Fuck… you…

— I have to stop. This alley looks empty — Ticktum turned the car into a dimly lit area and took his member out of his shorts. — Help me with this, please — he asked slyly.

— Have you gone crazy? What if someone sees?

— Fuck, I need you.

— Not here, Dani. It's too risky.

(...)

Chapter Text

The British man agreed with him and kept his member in his underwear, focusing on the journey home. He looked for a route without speed cameras and stepped on the accelerator, taking a small highway to speed up their arrival. Minutes later, he stopped the vehicle in the garage at home and quickly took Sérgio's bags out of the trunk. The Brazilian was worried about so much impulse, but got carried away when the other got him excited with a few touches.

— You wanted to share the room, didn’t you? — Dan kissed Sérgio passionately, taking him by the hip and leading the other into his own arms. — What do you think about seeing where we're going to sleep?

— You're going to do it anyway — the Brazilian smiled and bumped into a door that was ajar due to Ticktum's carelessness. — It hurt!

— I'm sorry — he kissed him once again, laying him down on the bed gently.

— The ice cream, Dan…

— Tomorrow I'll buy more... we can make a milkshake with what melts — he got rid of his clothes quickly. — I just need you one more time.

— Only one more?

— Shut up, Sérgio. You broke the mood.

— Just rekindle it — the shorter man grabbed the other's erect member, who started to moan. Dan seemed more excited and agitated.

— It's so good to finally be at home — the Brit took a deep breath when Sérgio began to suck him. — Do whatever you want. You're in charge now.

Sérgio asked him to turn around just to squeeze Ticktum's white ass. Then he approached his ear to whisper.

— Close your eyes, Dani. Say what you're feeling.

— Everything… everything at the same time — he screamed as he was suddenly penetrated. — Son of a bitch! Bastard…

— Did you feel anything else? — Sérgio laughed and explored the taller man's body, touching him in other sensitive parts. — And now? — he slapped his ass and thrust a few times in a movement that left him completely surrendered.

— What do you want me to say? Get straight to the point.

— Whatever your heart tells you… but in the meantime, enjoy the moment.

— Stop teasing me… do your fucking job right.

— Wrong answer, Ticktum — he penetrated all the way in, eliciting a low moan. — You like that, don't you?

— Fuck you, bastard!

— Go in my place. Oh, there's already a dick in there, right? Do you know what it does? Here it is — Sérgio gave another quick thrust, hearing a scream of pleasure. — Repeat what you said.

— I'm not going to say anything else. You're playing dirty.

— Then close the highways and hold a protest — Sérgio mocked. — Want to stop?

— If you dare...

He took his member out of the Londoner and entered him again, hearing the longest sequence of swear words of his entire life.

— You know that doesn't offend me, right? — the Brazilian slapped his ass.

— From now on I will never show you any mercy in bed.

— How can you be sure that we’ll have sex again? You're so pretentious…

— Because I fucking love you. Satisfied? I realized this today and I was really going to take a few days to say it because I didn't want to scare you, but that's it — he turned to the other man and shrugged.

The words hit Sérgio hard. It was unexpected, but perfectly understandable. He stopped to think and noticed the sincerity in the British man's eyes.

— Since when? — Sérgio asked.

— I knew for sure today, but I've been noticing it over the last few months. I like your presence, I feel comfortable and important to someone who makes me feel like a whirlwind of things.

— I asked because I noticed something... I love you too — he placed one of his hands on the center of his chest and took a deep breath. — And it seems like we’ve been feeling this for a while…

— Perhaps since we met. It's been a few years, right? I think it went unnoticed with the crazy lives we have.

— It's true... and now, after everything, we work on the same team, in the same category. I can't think of anything other than...

— Fate? — Dan interrupted and he nodded. — I think you're right... someone like you can only be a work of fate.

— I say the same about you — Sérgio smiled.

— Look — the Englishman paused to think. — My career so far has been really crazy and I've been through a lot of things in the midst of what happened... you must have read about me when I arrived in Formula E.

— I haven't read almost anything about this. I wanted to know what you were like in person… I've always hated prejudgments based on things that don't necessarily portray reality. I never asked you what happened, but I've always been curious.

— I'll tell you everything one day. Since you love me too, I guess we'll have some time. Well, I broke the whole mood of what we were doing… I'm sorry.

— Just rekindle it — he repeated the phrase and laughed. — But if you want, I’m all yours. Just make me cum again when you're done.

— Your request is an order — the Englishman kissed him. — It feels like a weight was lifted off my shoulders when I said I love you.

— That's good. I didn't expect this, but I'm so glad we have more in common than we can imagine.

— I always worried a lot about the future and what could happen, but today I just want to know about the present.

— Great. Now it's time to fuck me, what do you think? Stop chatting and enjoy a little more.

Ticktum tried a different position so that Sérgio would feel more pleasure. The penetration started smoothly and was accelerated, leaving the Brazilian in ecstasy. Dan kissed him countless times, feeling entirely comfortable. The caresses, touches and moans revealed how much they were a mixture of feelings, like clashing particles releasing reactions.

He reached his peak and fell apart on Sérgio's face, who received the jets of semen on his face. Dan kissed him and started to masturbate Sérgio, fulfilling the promise to make him cum. He squeezed the Brazilian's testicles lovingly, making him even more horny.

The shorter man's orgasm was thrown into the Londoner's chest. They got up and headed to the shower, but Dan had more plans for them.

— Wait for me here. Meanwhile, fill the bathtub and throw in the salts when it’s done — the Englishman asked and went to the kitchen to get one of the bottles of wine he had bought.

(...)

Chapter Text

Ticktum came back minutes later and found Sérgio typing on his cell phone. He left the device on the bed as soon as he realized he was no longer alone.

— You seem worried. Did something happen?

— No — Sérgio picked up the glasses and held one in each hand for Dan to serve.

The Englishman took out the cork, which had been partially lifted in the kitchen, poured them some red wine, and placed it on the edge of the bathtub. They got in and felt completely relaxed in the warm water.

— We're out of the racing environment, but I feel like I'm going hundreds of kilometers per hour with you — Ticktum toasted him and looked thoughtful after his glass was quickly emptied.

— I feel something similar... I think I took a ten-kilometer straight and stepped on the accelerator. It's something so good and so new, but now we're going to slow down a little. We don't need to be in a hurry... we will have a lot of time ahead of us.

— That's so good to know — the Londoner smiled. — Oh, how I needed to spend some time in this bathtub... I don't use it that often.

— You should enjoy it more. I saw the piano in the living room… have you been playing it lately?

— Very little, to be honest. If you want, I can make a small presentation.

— I would love it! Hear… I think it’s cool that you have several talents beyond motorsport. Exploring these activities can do you a lot of good in the coming days.

— It may seem stupid, but I always take a notebook to write some texts and I use the notepad on my cell phone at times. It's nothing big, but I write what makes sense or what I experience. In the midst of so many scribbles, there are some texts that mention someone like you…

— I want to read it! — the Brazilian became curious. — How is it?

— it's just loose ideas and confused thoughts that I try to develop on paper and on my cell phone. One day I'll show it to you.

— I'd settle for some piano for now — Sérgio poured them more wine and switched places in the bathtub so they were side by side. He laid his head on Dan's shoulder and smiled. — You also like taking photos, don't you? I've seen you with a camera around the paddock.

— Yeah, I took a camera that was at my parents’ house and started recording some things. Do you know when you find a little pleasure in activities and hobbies other than racing?

— Yes, I actually think you need to spend more time doing this. I want to see the photos and texts when you feel comfortable to share with me.

— I've also written some song lyrics — the Englishman took a sip of wine and left the glass next to the almost empty bottle. — Do you want more?

— This is really cool, Dani! — he handed the glass to the other, who poured the rest of the drink. — You forgot to bring the snacks.

— I haven't forgotten. I didn't intend to spend so much time here, so I just brought the wine.

— All right — the Brazilian smiled and observed him. — You seem calmer now.

— You played an important role in this, because if I had left the circuit alone I would have already wallowed in self-pity in the nearest pub.

— I'm glad that didn't happen. I thought about doing the same thing when the race came to an end, but staying with you was a lot better than my initial plan.

Dan and Sérgio stayed for a while longer talking in the still warm water. The two got out of the bathtub and dried themselves off, heading to the kitchen afterwards.

— I can make pasta if you're really hungry — Ticktum asked as he opened the fridge and took out a bottle of champagne.

— Let's eat the snacks first. What do you think about watching a movie? Then we can have dinner.

— A movie? — Dan opened the bottle and took other glasses to serve. — You read my thoughts.

— Where are the snacks? Inside? — Sérgio scratched his head and pointed to the fridge.

— Yes. You can pick it up... make yourself at home — Dan shook his head as he cut the cheese on a cutting board. — We've already had sex twice in just a few hours, so...

— Why did you mention that? — the Brazilian grabbed him from behind and placed a kiss on his neck. —Want more?

— What happened to “now we’re going to slow down a little” ? — the Englishman felt a shiver run through his entire body, like a stimulus to lose himself again.

— I just wanted to do a test — Sérgio kissed the other's forehead, who hugged him.

They took the snacks and champagne to the couch, where they settled down to watch the movie. The two exchanged a few words and laughed at the romantic comedy, with the closeness and exchange of affection increasing as the film drew to a close.

— Will they end up together? — Dan asked the Brazilian, who laid his head on his chest.

— I don't know, but it really seems like the guy also loves the girl. I think it's enough for them to have a happy ending.

— Do you believe in happy endings, Serginho? — he asked, but soon regretted it because he didn't want to be pretentious. It was just a passing curiosity.

— Yes, but I also like the happiness that is part of the journey until that ending arrives, you know? Wow, your heart is beating so fast — the Brazilian paused to listen more carefully. — And what do you think?

— I really believe… everyone deserves something like this — he swallowed and stroked Sérgio's messy hair. — Thanks for staying in London for a few more days.

— Don't thank me. I wanted to stay and you became a reason for that — the Brazilian kissed him. — Thank you for being honest with me and for opening up so much all at once. I hope this process leads us to a good ending.

— Serginho…

— Dani… — he imitated him. — What? We like each other…

— I know, but my question was not pretentious. I just wanted to know if you believed in love.

— Of course I believe it. What we are living here is about love, isn't it? So…

— It's not every day that a driver falls in love with another — Ticktum shrugged and took a snack to eat.

— This is much more common than we can imagine. Just being here, together, already means a lot... because it's always more difficult when something isn't reciprocated or when there's a barrier.

— It's true. I like the idea that it took us a long time to understand how much we like each other.

— Some things happen at the right time. I think this is our case. It was something built little by little, but when it finally happened we seemed so...

— In love? — the Londoner took his eyes off the television and the shorter man agreed. — I love you, Serginho. I don't know if it's too early to repeat this a few times, but fuck it. I like you and I'm going to repeat this.

— You can repeat it as many times as you want — the Brazilian intertwined his fingers with his and smiled. — I love you too. Coming after you when the race was over was one of my best decisions.

The movie came to an end and they remained on the couch. It was after eleven at night, but they were in no hurry. The cozy atmosphere of the room and the tranquility of having nothing to worry about left them feeling comfortable being together.

The two exchanged smiles and looks filled with affection. The film and the conversations awakened something within them and the desire to express the emotions that were bubbling within them spoke louder. The weight of the competition was left behind, while both gave themselves over to the simple joy of being together, taking the opportunity to take their foot off the accelerator.

— I feel as if we were in a refuge — Sérgio broke the silence. — The pressures of the outside world are so insignificant now…

— I wish other people were like you.

— In what sense?

— I don't know. It's just... you look at life in such a beautiful way — Ticktum's eyes sparkled. — That's rare nowadays. I also like the way you deal with situations… always calmly, balanced…

— It's difficult to be like that. I also have my moments of stress and agitation, but I try to keep it from getting out of control. Sometimes I just wish I had some of your energy when I get upset about something.

— Believe me... you don't want to. I even want to work on this so that it happens less and less. But now I just want to disconnect a little... I want to enjoy the next few days we have together — Dan kissed him and the two spent some more time on the couch talking.

In the comforting stillness of the room, the boys left the worries and tensions of the Formula E season behind. They chose to focus on living each moment together in the best way possible.

(...)

Chapter Text

The Brit and the Brazilian talked about the pasta that Dan was going to prepare for dinner. Then, Sérgio got up, went to the table and began to organize it for the meal. As he picked up the plates and silverware, the pair of brown eyes stopped over a forgotten candle in the corner of the room. Despite its simplicity, it would serve the immediate purpose he had given for the object.

A spontaneous smile formed on Sérgio's face, who wanted to add a romantic touch to the special night. Carefully, he placed it in the center of the table and searched for matchsticks to light it at the appropriate time, eager to see the soft light that would dance between them.

Meanwhile, Dan was busy in the kitchen, preparing the pasta with great skill. Sérgio sat on a high stool at the counter facing the kitchen and watched the taller man with admiration as he moved between the ingredients, lost in his own thoughts.

The Brazilian couldn't help but think about how life had changed over the months he spent sharing the same garage with Ticktum. There was a time when he only dreamed of having someone with whom to share moments like those. He realized that having Dan's company was very special, even more so on a night that would sound too perfect for anyone who didn't believe in love.. But they believed with every bit of their lives.

As the aromas began to fill the kitchen and living room, Sérgio closed his eyes for a moment, feeling grateful for feeling peace and happiness with each other. While the Englishman finished preparing dinner, the Brazilian silently approached him from behind and wrapped him in a loving hug. Dan turned to look Sérgio in the eyes, and in an instant of connection, he realized how comfortable and happy he felt next to him.

— Today was a day full of firsts — Ticktum smiled at him and reduced the flame that heated the pan to keep the sauce from burning. — I've never cooked for anyone, you know? Someone I really like, of course… so thanks for being here, Serginho. Thank you for trying to understand the never-ending mess that I am. For understanding me and not walking away even when I lost my mind. For teaching me so much even though you're just a little older than me. And, finally, for loving me and for making me happy. You've been good to me for so long, but only now have I understood the extent of it.

Sérgio hugged him again, remaining silent for some time. Between the smell of the tomato sauce and the other's soft perfume, he felt closer to his own roots for the first time in a while. He felt that Dan was safe and comfortable, so he decided to speak up.

— Once again I feel the same way. It's amazing how we found this happiness together, isn't it? It's great to be by your side...

— That's true — Dan smiled and took the pan off the heat. — The sauce is ready... I'm going to put the pasta in the oven just to let the cheese melt. Want more wine?

— Yes — Sérgio took one of his hands to the refrigerator door and smiled. — This is the first time I’ve opened it.

— I hope it's the first of many. I want to take a picture of us. Not necessarily to be posted, but because I want to keep a record of something very special.

— I also want to take a picture of us from today, but I was wondering what time would be most appropriate to suggest this. And we can post some if you want.

The two left Dan's cell phone on the counter and took several photos with the self-timer. Then the Brazilian served wine for them, who were still under the influence of the two bottles consumed previously. They toasted and took a few sips, savoring the smooth white wine that would certainly leave them dizzy.

Dan took the pasta out of the oven minutes later and took the casserole dish to the table. The Brazilian lit the candle and turned off the lamp that directly illuminated the table to create a more intimate atmosphere. They sat and served generous dishes.

— Wow, it looks amazing! — Ticktum looked at the arrangement with joy.

— This reminded me of dinners at home.

— I don't think there's any difference — the Londoner opened a smile and held his hand. — You're at home.

— Yes, I am — Sérgio returned the smile. — I hope you feel as comfortable in my house as I feel here.

— I'm just waiting for the invitation — Dan twirled some of the pasta with his fork and turned his attention back to him. — Now you have to cook for us.

— I have little creativity in the kitchen, but I'll see what I can prepare. Oh, and I always made it clear that you could visit me in Andorra!

— You were always very nice, but I never imagined we would be as close as we are now. That's why I've never been... and I don't usually invite myself to go places either.

— I understand you. It's just that where I come from, people usually invite people to visit, you know? I know it's a habit of someone who left a city in Brazil to racing around the world, but many things are still here inside — Sérgio pointed to the center of his own chest.

— I'm glad that it continue... this is part of you.

Dan noticed that the other was one step away from letting tears fall and he didn't know what to do.

— I miss so many things, but I was happy to feel a little bit of the home atmosphere here — the Brazilian drank all the wine in his glass and took a deep breath. — Can we change the topic?

— Sure. You haven't even touched the pasta yet... I want to know if it will please you or not.

— Oh my God, it's true. How rude of me — Sérgio looked at his plate and started to eat. — Yeah… Ticktum’s pasta is really good! You talked about it so much and I wanted to try it so much…

— I'm glad this day has arrived — the Brit served them more wine and noticed that the Brazilian had become a little distracted and seemed more relaxed.

As they shared dinner, the two exchanged smiles and lively conversations, immersing themselves in the feeling of happiness and contentment that surrounded them. When they finished eating, Dan and Sérgio took the ice cream that the Englishman placed in the freezer as soon as possible and prepared a milkshake for dessert. Then, they decided to take some time to talk to their own families on the cell phone and separated themselves for that.

The Brazilian called his parents and soon switched to video calling, as he wanted to see them even if it was through the screen. He talked about the last races of the championship, which they had only seen on television. When the parents asked about going to Brazil for vacation, Sérgio said he would stay in London for a few more days. After hearing some words of encouragement, he said goodbye to his family and ended the call missing them even more, but the certainty that he would be able to see everyone soon made him calmer.

Dan took less time to talk to his family, as the Ticktums had gone to the race the day before. The Englishman's family did the same as Sérgio's in supporting him after his lost podium at the end of the last stage of the competition, but it was his mother who said the most touching phrases when showing all the pride she had in him. The call ended after he told his mother that he couldn't join the family the next day because the Brazilian was at his house.

— Serginho? — he walked through the house to look for the other, finding him sitting on the piano bench. — I found you. It's okay?

— Yeah, I think — the shorter one lied and rubbed his eyes. — Can you play some music?

— Of course — Dan smiled, sat down next to him and lifted the cover that protected the piano keys. — What do you want to hear?

— Anything. I just need something to distract me.

Ticktum nodded and started playing the first song he remembered. The notes and chords had the opposite effect on Sérgio and left him even more emotional. The crying, which had been suppressed before, finally happened. The tears fell quickly, revealing how vulnerable he also felt, even though he was managing his emotions well.

— Don't cry... — Dan paused briefly to leave a kiss on his cheek and went back to playing the piano. — I love you. I shouldn't have picked Divenire, but I think this song helps to put some feelings in front of us so we can deal with them.

— It's beautiful — he said between sobs. — I just needed to cry a little... I've been holding it for hours and the conversation with my family made me think about a lot of things...

— Go to Brazil — the Englishman finished the song and looked at the other’s distant gaze. — Cancel your stay in London... I'll be here when you get back. It's okay to run into the arms of family when we miss them — Ticktum put his arm around him and pulled him closer. — Listen to what your heart is asking for. At times we need to abandon rationality.

— I know, but my heart asked me to stay and that's what I'm going to do. We both need each other now... and I saw my family at the São Paulo race, so it hasn't been that long.

— Are you sure about this?

— Yes — Sérgio kissed him through his tears. — This is where I want to be right now. The two of us… together… everything else can wait.

— All good. Want another song by the same composer?

— As many as you want — the Brazilian placed his head on the taller man's shoulder, who felt loved and happy. — I would spend hours watching and listening to you doing it.

— It's so good to know. Well, let's start... — Dan took a folder and leafed through the plastic sheets until he found Ludovico Einaudi's songs. Those were his favorites.

The minutes passed slowly. Time, previously very fast, was suspended like the times when they took deep breaths at high speed. The sounds that came from the piano seemed to have embraced Sérgio, who closed his eyes and enjoyed every touch of Ticktum on the keys.

When the music selection came to an end, the Brit stood up and extended his hand to the shorter man, who followed him into the bedroom. After they brushed their teeth and settled down on the bed in the Englishman's room, they both exchanged caresses and fell into a comforting silence. The soft touch of hands that briefly met made them talk about the day they had. The day everything changed for them both. The day when Dan finally felt a weight lift off his shoulders, while Sérgio found himself madly in love — more than before — with his teammate. They were no longer what they used to be. “How good” , they repeated together.

— This is the best way to end such a crazy day — the shorter one sighed softly.

— Everything I wanted happened. It was perfect, Serginho… sharing so many things in such a short amount of time did me a lot of good — he wrapped him in a warm hug.

As they prepared to go to sleep, they knew that those memories would be marked forever for giving them the peace they needed so much. The soft blanket welcomed the drivers, who felt ready for a new day with more happy memories and mutual support. They made a mental, secret and perhaps even volatile promise: they would stay together, because it made them feel better. For the Brit and the Brazilian, two were better than one.

— I love you.

— I love you too — Ticktum replied and hugged him.

Sérgio and Dan surrendered to sleep, knowing that they could live many more days like that. Even with the obstacles imposed by the harshness of motorsport, which they already knew very well throughout their lives, they received something as a gift from the sport. The same sport that had taken so much from both in previous years gifted the riders with love, which many said healed all things and calmed even the most troubled of hearts. A love that grew over time, being watered by patience, affection and a desire to be present in the other's life.

The time had come to reap the fruits of a connection that illuminated both of their paths.

They would still have many special moments to share together.

It was just the beginning.

(...)