Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 1

     It was a Sunday evening, the library had hosted a small event that afternoon so after everyone left Aziraphale and Muriel stayed to get everything back in its place for Monday. They were staying a little later than usual, the library was already closed, but since Aziraphale would be working alone for the next few days Muriel helped him get the library clean and organized.

     "I think there's only a couple of chairs left to move Mr. Fell" Muriel said coming down the stairs.

     "Thank you dear" Aziraphale replied "You can head home now, it's starting to get late. Do you have everything ready for tomorrow?".

     Muriel answered positively and asked if he wanted to add some final items to the list. Aziraphale thinks for a second while putting some books on the shelves.

     "Actually, could you bring some flowers? Or flower seeds, I feel like they would make the place feel more welcoming. And we'll be having Miss Jemima's pottery event in a few weeks, that way everyone would have a few seeds to plant on the vases after they're done.".

     Muriel agreed on the idea and when they asked Aziraphale which flowers would be best for the occasion he said that carnations would be splendid.

     "But they aren't blooming this time of the year" he remembered, "I'm sure you can buy some seeds though.".

     Muriel took note of that and headed back home to get some sleep before traveling. That isn't an uncommon event, occasionally they have to travel across a few cities to get different books and also to meet with library partners. And since Muriel started to work at the library they don't need to close for a week. That's how long these trips take. It would be fun to have company while traveling, but they both agree this is the best way to do it. Aziraphale knows Muriel does a great job when they're away, as good of a job as when they're the one to stay at the library.

     Aziraphale finished with the library and went to his house right next door. Both places share a hallway making it easy for him to go to the library as he pleases. Occasionally falling asleep would be hard, so he would sneak into the library to read in the middle of the night. His place is quiet and cozy, but the library always makes him feel safe. But that night he managed to fall asleep soon after a cup of tea and a small read.

     When the sun rose the next morning, Muriel took their backpack and picked up their horse, Cupperty, from the town’s stable. They departed early, leaving Aziraphale to work alone again for some days. He didn’t mind as he worked alone for a good while, but Muriel was a great helper, especially in the busier days. They traveled through different towns, checking their to-do list and marking the progress made during those days. The only thing they couldn't do was find the carnations. That wasn't a big surprise that time of the year but they weren't having any luck finding seeds either.

     At the end of the fifth day right, as the sun was setting and Muriel approached the last town of that day, they saw a cottage on the side of the road. It was a beautiful building but something felt of. There was no light inside the house making it seem completely empty, and even though the house didn’t look new the doorknock appeared to be. Muriel got a bad feeling about the house itself, like it was haunted by ghosts. But what made them notice the house in the first place was the garden going all the way around. There were all sorts of plants and they looked full of life, especially compared to the house in the center. And among all the flowers Muriel spotted a few carnations. They were magnificent and magical as they weren’t supposed to bloom this time of the year.

     After a few minutes of carefully glancing at the house, Muriel decided to head to the city, get Cupertty to the stables, and find some food and a room at the inn.

     On the next morning, they left their room refreshed and determined to finish the last task. They headed downstairs and while eating some breakfast they asked the innkeeper if they knew anything about that mysterious house.

     "It is certainly something, but we don’t like to talk about it here" he answered as he got some coffee ready "But why the curiosity? Did you see someone there?".

     Muriel denied it and continued with "The house seems abandoned, is no one living there?".

     The innkeeper picked up a tray with coffee and food and said "No people live there, that I can guarantee" before leaving in the direction of some tables.

     Muriel finished their meal and went in the direction of the house with Cupperty. They gently tied the horse to a tree on the other side of the street and looked again at the house. The idea of ghosts wasn’t completely off their mind.

     "Ghosts aren’t real" they repeated a few times "If they were the ghost stories wouldn’t all be in the fiction section of the library".

     They approached the fence whose gate was already open, either as an invitation or as a warning. They reached for one of the blooming carnations.

    "Only one will do, there are plenty of seeds inside I believe".

     Soon after they took the flower they heard something approaching them rapidly. Before they were able to turn they heard a furious voice close to them.

     "What do you think you’re doing?".

    As they turned terrified, they could only see two yellow snake eyes surrounded by black and red scales. They seemed to be looking directly into their soul, feeding off the fear that they were causing.

Author's note

     Here's the first chapter of "The Serpent's carnations"! I hope you enjoyed it, the next ones will probably be a little bit longer as this one was more of an introduction. And I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes as English is not my first language. If you'd like to keep updated when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube and Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to new chapters and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 2

    It is late at night now. The library had been closed for a few hours but there's still someone inside. Aziraphale barely slept last night and even if he was tired he was having trouble again tonight. Muriel had never gotten delayed before, and a couple of days is more than enough to get Aziraphale worried about their safety. There usually aren’t many dangers when they travel. It was cold but not too much to handle and it didn’t rain. His brain can only think of all the different possibilities, little does he know that he can’t even get close to the truth.

    Earlier that day, during his lunch break, he went to Gabriel's office to have a word with him. After all, the library is a public service and therefore takes funds from the government. As the town representative, Gabriel has to be informed if something happens regarding the library. He heard Aziraphale's concerns about Muriel and his wishes to go look for them.

    "As you can see here, we don't have any visits or events planned this week." Aziraphale showed him, "And I think this matter shouldn't be left ignored. I have a bad feeling about their delay but I’m confident I can find them and we’ll both return in less than a week".

    Gabriel didn't particularly care for the "bad feeling" Aziraphale was having, but he did find the occurrence odd. He has known Muriel for years and knows they're very responsible and organized so a few days couldn't be a good sign. With that in mind, he also knew that it wasn’t an urgent enough matter to justify more extreme measures like a search party. In his brain, he could only imagine Muriel getting sidetracked somehow. With that in mind, Aziraphale has a good chance of getting them back soon.

    "How do you plan on finding them?" Gabriel asked and Aziraphale already had a plan.

    He and Muriel had organized that trip together so he knew where they would be stopping. He planned to go the opposite way.

    "If Muriel is still traveling we'll end up bumping into each other" he said "And I’m hopeful that they managed to finish most of the trip. Otherwise they would be in whatever situation they are for more than just a few days.".

    Gabriel thought a little bit about it while looking at the information Aziraphale had presented to him. He showed him the library’s schedule and also the trip plan. He likes to keep all important information registered, labeled, and properly organized.

    "I'll approve the closing of the library starting tomorrow, you can go look for them in the morning".

    "Oh, thank you-" Aziraphale said but Gabriel interrupted him with "But if you don't return in a week I'll be sending someone to work temporarily in the library. I know you're very particular with who you hire, that's why you only have Muriel there to help you, but I'm sure you can understand that the library can't just close indefinitely".

    Aziraphale understood but guaranteed that it wouldn't be necessary.

    He spent the rest of the day in the library working and, after closing, he packed a bag and got everything ready for the next day. He brewed some tea and went to the library late at night to distract himself. He tries to focus on the warm tea and on the book he picked to keep him company that night but his eyes are a bit too tired to read. The lack of sleep from the previous night makes it difficult to focus on the words in the open pages in front of him. He ends up taking the book and tea with him back to his house. After reading, or at least trying to do so, he falls asleep on the couch.

    He leaves in the morning with a small suitcase carrying only a few clean clothes and a couple of books. He also takes a small notebook and a little bit of money on the jacket’s pockets. He rents a horse that morning and they start to travel.

    He checks on the trip plan to see where Muriel had to stop by and asks if they’ve seen them. On the first couple of days, he had no luck, no one had seen them yet. With every town they passed, his worries would worsen. He started to fear that something happened right at the beginning of the trip and by the time he gets to them two weeks would have passed. And to make matters worse, his sleep wasn’t improving. He couldn’t just sneak into the library in the middle of the night when he was towns away. He would read his books and try to get comfortable but it was not an easy task.

    But on the third day, just as he approaches another town he sees a familiar vision. Tied with a long rope to a tree he sees Cupperty. His eyes open with hope and he feels a small relief. He checks on Cupperty, who's okay, and sees that there’s a little bit of food and water close by. He looks at the cottage on the other side of the street. He gets a little distracted by how mesmerizing the garden is but focuses on his mission soon after. He secures his horse close to Cupperty and goes to check on the house.

    He knocks on the door and waits a little bit but no one answers. He decides to take a look around the house. There was no one outside and as he picks inside the windows he can only see a messy and empty house. But he soon finds a window leading to a bedroom and Muriel is there sitting on the bed looking sad and reading a book. He tried to get close to the window but there were a lot of plants and bushes in between. Waiving seemed like a good second option and that's exactly what he did. Muriel notices him almost immediately and runs to open the window.

    "What happened? What are you doing here?" he asks worried but relieved to have found them.

    "I messed up really bad Mr Fell" they whisper "There's a monster living in this house and he's keeping me here.".

    "Oh, don't be silly. There are no such things as monsters" he says as he tries to calm down Muriel and get closer to the window.

    "Don't come near!" they say immediately "You can't touch the plants. That's what got me here in the first place, he'll do the same to you".

    Aziraphale looks at their worried expression and takes a step back.

    "Don't worry dear, I'll get you out of there. Just take a deep breath, I'll be right back.".

    He walks to the front door and this time tries to open it. It wasn't locked so he does it by simply twisting the handle. He looks around to check the inside of the house and there was no one near. He goes inside in the direction of the room Muriel is in and opens the door without any trouble. Muriel turns away from the window and looks at Aziraphale surprised to see him inside.

    "Come on, let's get moving" he says still a bit shocked that the door opened immediately.

    "Did he see you? He might be hiding around somewhere" they say as they get closer to the door.

    "Don't worry, there's no one here" he says smiling but he notices Muriel’s gaze switch to something behind him.

    "Are you sure?" he hears before being able to turn around.

    His heart stops for a second as he looks at Muriel terrified. He turns around fast and puts himself in front of Muriel before even seeing where that voice came from. He thought it was just a person angry that he got into their house but what he sees instead makes his body freeze. He starts to wonder if he fell asleep on the horse and is now dreaming. A giant snake was slithering from another room and up the wall while holding into the door frame. He stares down at Aziraphale waiting for an answer. His sleep-deprived brain was having a hard time processing everything that happened in the last minute but he tries to form a sentence.

    "I’m sorry to get into your house" he says in an attempt of gaining a little bit of time to think of a solution.

    "Why are you here?" the snake asks getting a little closer.

    "I came to get my friend home" he answers, but it wasn’t hard to predict that.

    "I’m afraid they can’t leave yet.".

    Aziraphale asks why and the snake eyes start staring at Muriel. He gets in front of them staring at the snake.

    "They were stealing from me. And I don’t take thieves kindly" he answers slowly but angrily.

    "I am terribly sorry, I’m sure they can return what they took so we can solve this" Aziraphale replies trying not to stutter and without turning he asks Muriel "What did you take?".

    "I saw a carnation in the garden and I thought no one lived here so I took it" they say nervous "I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean to-". Before being able to finish the sentence they’re interrupted.

    "As you can see this can’t just be returned. They cut one of my flowers and they’ll stay until it grows back. And I suggest you leave, I don’t take kindly to trespassers either".

    Aziraphale didn’t want to leave Muriel there but he didn’t want to risk staying there too. There was something off about that whole situation, he could see that much, but he was too tired to put the pieces together. His thought process is abruptly stopped when he hears the snake’s voice again.

    "Do I need to repeat myself?".

    "No" Aziraphale replies immediately "I understood perfectly. But I would like to suggest a deal".

    He sees the snake getting curious and Muriel asks nervously what’s his plan.

    "I would like to stay here instead, and you let my friend go. They only took that flower because I asked them to, if there's someone to blame it is me" he says with a serious expression.

    He was not willing to leave Muriel there. He knows something is going on, he just needs a little bit of time and sleep to figure it out.

    "You can't stay here" Muriel says scared but Aziraphale signals them to wait and they do. After a few seconds of pondering, the snake agrees. Aziraphale puts his arms down and turns to Muriel who is very nervous.

    "I'm so sorry I got us into this mess" they say "I shouldn't have taken that flower, I'm really sorry".

    Aziraphale puts his hand on Muriel's shoulder and tells her that it's okay, everything will be okay. Deep down he was feeling guilty too, he was the one to ask for the flowers. But whose fault it is isn’t relevant, what matters is that they make the best decision.

    "Cupperty is outside and so is my horse, you can return with them to town." he says calmly "You still have a few stops on your trip so I want you to keep the original plan. After you return you need to talk to Gabriel and say that I had to stay behind to solve some issues. You can tell him there's no need to worry but, for now, you'll be in charge of the library.".

    "I don't know if I can do it. It's already going to be hard to finish the trip, I can’t imagine how hard it will be to take care of the library alone".

    "You’ve done it before and excelled in every aspect. I know you can take that responsibility.".

    He knows how nervous Muriel can get but he also knows how capable they are. That’s why it would be best for him to stay instead, he can handle that situation better than them. The library will be in good hands when Muriel returns, which gives him more time to solve his current situation. They were feeling guilty because of the whole situation, making them doubt their abilities.

    "Are you sure about this? You seem tired, maybe you should rest and think about it for a while before you decide".

    "I don’t believe we have the time to do that dear" he says and hears "You don’t" coming from the snake behind them immediately after.

    Aziraphale gives him a look over the shoulder that would have scared most people and it might have scared the snake too. He turns to Muriel again with a soft smile on his face and reassures them that they’ll do a good job. Muriel gets their bag while Aziraphale returns to the door to speak with the snake still on the wall.

    "May I get my bags from the horse?" he asks in a serious tone.

    "They can get them for you before they leave" was the answer he got.

    He nods and the snake slithers away into the living room. Muriel has their backpack ready to go but they aren't happy about it. They go get Aziraphale's bag from the horse and he takes that time to write a note. When they return he hands them the paper.

    "Take this to Gabriel. I don't want him to think that you're lying so just give him this when you talk."

    Muriel thanks him and gives him a strong hug.

    "Please be careful" they whisper sadly.

    "I will, I promise I'll be okay and will return in no time".

    After a few seconds, Muriel leaves. Aziraphale just stands in the middle of that room too exhausted to process everything.

    The serpent appears at his door soon after and says "They've left".

    Aziraphale lifts his head a little bit looking into his eyes. He slithers away and closes the door loudly. A few more seconds pass and Aziraphale finally takes a look around the room. There was a chair and a wardrobe, a bed and two side tables. There were also a few plants around that he decided not to touch. He walks towards the bed and lays there without giving it much thought. It only took a few minutes for him to fall asleep. The amount of sleepless nights finally caught up to him now that he knew Muriel was okay and headed home. He should be afraid of being alone in an isolated house kept prisoner by a giant talking snake. But the mattress on that bed felt incredibly comfortable. So comfortable in fact that it was the only thought on his tired brain from the moment he touched it. He was so tired that it almost made him happy to be there. Almost.

Author's note

     Here's chapter 2 of "The Serpent's carnations"! The story is starting to take direction, and I truly hope you enjoyed it. I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes, English is not my first language. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen now that Aziraphale is there?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 3

    The night came a few hours later. If Aziraphale wasn’t so tired he would have heard the bedroom door opening.

    "Do you want food?" the snake asks coming into the room.

    He hears no response and soon notices Aziraphale lying on the bed. He gets quiet and comes a little closer. He found it odd that someone would be able to sleep like that in his house. He had noticed that Aziraphale was pretty tired when he got there, too tired to eat apparently. He didn't wake him, and neither did he leave. He kept looking at him for a while, curious about him. Aziraphale was breathing peacefully, unaware that there was someone next to him. For some reason, it was hard to stop looking at him. He didn’t look scared or upset, he almost looked pleased to be there. The snake chose not to believe that.

    "How long will he stay?" he wonders "I give him 3 days max".

    Long hours pass and Aziraphale gets his well-deserved rest. He wakes up with the sun hitting his face and the smell of coffee lingering in the air. There was some confusion when he woke up, it took him a few seconds to remember what had happened. Aziraphale lays on the bed for a while before getting up and ready for the day. His mind starts thinking about what happened yesterday. He knew something was off, and now that he's well-rested he has a good chance of figuring it out. But there’s another problem distracting him. He is hungry and doesn't have any food, just some water. Before he could think of a plan he heard the door open behind him.

    "I see you’re awake" the snake says "Do you want to eat something?".

    "It smells like coffee" Aziraphale points out instead of answering.

    "Do you want coffee?" he asks.

    "Not really, no" he answers a little nervous.

    "I can make you toast".

    "Oh, that would be lovely" he says smiling somewhat oblivious "Thank you… I’m sorry, what’s your name?".

    "It’s Crowley" he answers still skeptical of Aziraphale’s calmness.

    He leaves before Aziraphale can ask anything else. He pulled the door handle as he left but it didn't fully close. Aziraphale gets closer and peeks through the slit of the door. He can only see the hallway and a couple of closed doors. He had been there yesterday, outside that room, but he didn't take a good look at the house. He had the time to look around now but his view was very limited. Opening the door wasn't an option though, he didn't want to risk getting Crowley upset. He distances himself and paces around a little bit.

    He inspects the room without opening or even touching anything. There was a bookshelf in the corner close to the window but it didn't have any books, not yet at least. There was a plant, a blanket, a candle near an empty picture frame, and some matches. To its left, there was a chair next to a wardrobe that took over that corner of the room. And to the right was the bed he had slept in that night with two side tables, one empty and the other decorated with another plant. All the furniture seemed to be a little old but high quality. It makes him wonder how Crowley got them or the house. Not knowing the story behind that building only made Aziraphale more curious.

    When Crowley returns Aziraphale thanks him and sits down to eat.

    "I didn't know snakes could cook" he says before taking a bite.

    "I don't usually cook" Crowley states making Aziraphale's smile slightly fade away.

    "Does he eat like other snakes?" Aziraphale thinks to himself "Is he feeding me until he wants to eat me? Was he going to do that to Muriel?".

    Even with questions going through his mind, he asks Crowley to wait. Crowley was already headed to the door but he stopped and turned his head around. Aziraphale asks what the rules are.

    "Rules about what?" he asks back.

    "If I'm going to stay here I need to know the rules. Do I need to stay in this room? Can I send letters? Will you keep giving me food?".

    Crowley gets closer and lifts his head off the floor looking at Aziraphale in the eyes. Aziraphale doesn’t move, just stares back at him.

    "You can leave this room if you need to. There's a bathroom at the door to the right. Don't worry about the food and no, you can't send letters. And I better not find you snooping." Crowley says leaving right after.

    Aziraphale stays still for a few seconds and then finishes eating his toast.

    After he finished he couldn’t help but feel conflicted. Both he and Muriel stayed there but Crowley didn’t hurt them. He’s very intimidating so neither of them tried to get out. Would he have hurt them if they did? He also didn’t lock the room’s door, it isn’t locked now and it wasn’t locked when he came to get Muriel. But Crowley sounded and looked threatening. Aziraphale knew what it was like to be threatened, but this time it felt different. It felt like the problem wasn’t him. The people that had pushed him around would do it to him and no one else. Nothing could have changed it, he was the problem regardless of what he tried to do. Crowley is not like that. He may not be the nicest but Aziraphale believes he’s treating him the way he would anybody else.

    He hears him talking outside and gets close to the window. After spotting him in the middle of the garden he sees Crowley talking to them. That would be a lovely sight if Crowley wasn't screaming angrily at the plants. Aziraphale gets back a little bit and slowly closes the curtains. Now that Crowley is outside he could check the room better.

    "It isn't breaking any rules" he says quietly "I can do all the snooping I want as long as he doesn't see me".

    Aziraphale's curiosity about the whole house is unmeasurable, but he'll have to content himself with just that room, at least for now. That place made him nervous and a little bit excited at the same time. None of the books he brought were mysteries, but he had read a good amount of those. The plan wasn't to live one of those stories, but he's ready to carefully take the opportunity.

    He soon opens the wardrobe’s doors. To his surprise, there were just a few clothes. He felt somewhat relieved but also disappointed. He didn’t know what to expect, but clothes seemed too normal for that house. And it’s not like Crowley wears any anyway. He closes the doors again without touching anything. He walks in the direction of one of the side tables after checking that Crowley's still outside.

    That garden is impressive, it makes sense for him to take good care of all the flowers. He is very strict though, the flowers have to behave properly. He works hard to keep the garden free from invasive species. They have the right amount of water and the best soil they could ask for. And because of that, Crowley wouldn't accept anything less than greatness. All the plants knew that, it was rooted in them at that point. When Crowley returned to the house, Aziraphale had already inspected the bedroom completely. He didn't find much, just a broken pair of reading glasses and a pocket watch that had not been winded in some time. Everything was left in its place.

    They didn't see each other much that day, only when Crowley brought him food but those moments were short. He would leave rapidly, not allowing Aziraphale to ask any questions.

    But later that day, Aziraphale is sitting in bed reading a few pages of one of the books he bought with him when he hears the door open. He takes off his glasses and sees Crowley bringing him dinner. He thanks him as he did before but before Crowley leaves he decides to say something. He has thought of multiple questions he would like answers to, but it was hard to pick one.

    "How long will it take for that flower to grow back?" he asks.

    Crowley stops at the door and takes a serious look at Aziraphale.

    "It will take as long as it needs".

    "And how will I know if it's growing if I can't go outside?" Aziraphale continues.

    "You won't" Crowley answers as he leaves the room.

    Aziraphale stays still holding his plate for a few seconds. After a deep breath, he takes a seat and eats dinner. He wasn't sure about what Crowley meant. Could it be that Crowley just won't let him leave? Maybe that's how he'll spend the rest of his life, stuck in the house of a giant mean serpent away from his library.

    He stayed awake that night. The bed that felt comfortable yesterday didn’t feel the same now. No one replaced it, he would have seen that, but the comfort was gone. His eyes wouldn't even stay closed for more than a couple of minutes. After some tosses and turns, Aziraphale gives up on falling asleep for the time being.

    He grabs the book he's been reading and opens it taking a deep breath. He tried to get through at least a few pages but there were too many thoughts on his brain. The words in the book were being pushed around by his concerns making it hard to read. There were two conflicting sides. On one hand, the doors are not locked.

    "I could just go" he thinks glancing at the door.

    He didn't know when Crowley would let him go, or even if he would. If he tried he could possibly get away. It was tempting to go, but the rules kept flashing in his brain. Crowley said he could leave the room if he needed to, which he doesn't. Would he have a way of knowing if he got out? He could be waiting right outside his door.

    Could this be a test that can't be passed? Just a matter of time until one of the rules is broken and the test is failed. Aziraphale is not a fan of cheating on tests, he had never done it before. But he was pondering it. The stakes were higher though. In school when someone got caught cheating all they got was an angry teacher, a failed test, and a note for the parents. If he got caught here the outcome wouldn't be so peaceful and painless.

    He turned his eyes back to the book in an attempt to distract himself from the fear he was feeling.

    "I haven't broken any rules" he thinks "I'm safe, nothing bad will happen".

    But an eco in the back of his mind asked continuously "Is this a test? Or is it all a sick game?".

    The ending would be the same, but if it is all a game for Crowley then how can he be sure he's safe? Following the rules in that scenario will only make Crowley bored and he doesn't want to do that. It seems like there's nothing Aziraphale can do to ensure he'll be okay.

    He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes for a few seconds. He returns to the first line of that page as he had only glanced over the letters without reading a single word. He had to do that a couple of times but eventually, he finished the chapter and went to bed once again. He kept his eyes closed during the rest of the night but only slept a couple of spread-out hours.

    The next morning, Aziraphale feels some light coming in through the window. It wasn’t much, the sky was cloudy that day, but it was enough for him to notice. He got ready to start the day, even if there wasn't much for him to do. He tried to start conversations with Crowley but he would either give him short answers it completely ignore him.

    "How are you able to speak?" was what Aziraphale asked when Crowley brought him lunch.

    "Why does it matter?" Crowley answers while waiting for Aziraphale to take his plate.

    "It is rather interesting, I had never met a talking snake before" Aziraphale continues without grabbing the plate "Come to think of it, I'd never seen a snake like you before. Not even in book illustrations".

    Crowley gets closer balancing the plate on his head effortlessly and Aziraphale looks at him in the eyes.

    "How about you mind your business and grab your plate before I take it back?".

    Aziraphale gets quiet and does what Crowley asks. He wanted to know more about Crowley, he was hoping that by asking questions he would get at least some helpful information. Crowley doesn't seem chatty and after that interaction, Aziraphale decides not to push that many personal questions.

    During his free time, which is all the time he has, he organizes his ideas in his notebook. After giving it some thought, he starts to plot an escape plan. The weather will soon start to change, it's already getting colder. If it starts to rain, the sound can be enough for him to leave the house unnoticed and run to the village. It's just a matter of time now. If he's lucky that day will come during the following week.

    "There's a blanket over there" Crowley answers when Aziraphale mentions the cold weather.

    "Oh, I'm okay, but thank you" Aziraphale says getting his dinner.

    It was hard to just stay silent, but so was talking with Crowley. He also stayed awake for a good amount of that night. He knew that, eventually, he would get some good sleep, but he wasn't sufficiently tired to do it yet.

    During the following day, Aziraphale didn't have much energy. He read a little more of his book and looked outside the window. There wasn't much to do to pass the time. He didn't even try to start a conversation with Crowley, he was too bored and tired to do it. He still thanked him for the food, Aziraphale prides himself on his politeness.

    Crowley did find Aziraphale's quietness weird but decided not to question him. After all, it was the 3rd day, he would be surprised if Aziraphale was still there the next morning.

    After dark, Aziraphale was having a hard time sleeping again.

    "Some tea should help" he thinks to himself while getting up from the bed "It's still in the rules, I'm sure he'll understand if he sees me".

    Aziraphale leaves the room trying not to make a sound and walks in the kitchen's direction. His heart's beating fast, he hopes the tea will slow it down again. He opens some of the cabinets until he finds what he needs. At that moment Aziraphale wasn't paying attention to what he might find hiding there, but there wasn't anything out of the ordinary in that kitchen.

    Crowley had heard him leave the bedroom and was not surprised. What made him go check on him was the fact that he didn't hear the front door open, but instead, what sounded like Aziraphale cooking in the kitchen. He leaves his room carefully.

    "Could he actually be looking for a weapon instead of leaving?" he thinks confused.

    When he gets to the kitchen he sees something unexpected. Wrapped in a blanket, Aziraphale was standing there making some tea. He was so focused that he didn't see Crowley slither to the table and creep up on him.

    "What do you think you're doing?" he whispers to Aziraphale.

Author's note

     Here's chapter 3 of "The Serpent's carnations"! We got more of grumpy Crowley and detective Aziraphale in this chapter, I hope you enjoyed it. What do you think will happen next? I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes, English is not my first language. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Chapter 4 has been a lot of work, so it doesn't have all the images yet, but I'll add them as soon as they're done! Thank you again for reading!

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 4

    Aziraphale turns around quickly and gets away from Crowley dropping the blanket and almost tripping. He was cornered in the kitchen, there wasn't much he could do. No words were coming out of him, but he was almost sure Crowley could hear his heart beating. Crowley looks at him for a few seconds before starting to get closer.

    "There's something that I'm not quite understanding" he says "You willingly stayed here in this house. You haven't tried to run away even if the door was open. For a moment I thought you were planning on killing me".

    Crowley passes by Aziraphale's feet and gets up to the kitchen counter to face him directly. Aziraphale could feel his hands shaking a little bit. Crowley's eyes were looking at his and he could feel the anger in his voice.

    "But if you were actually planning on killing me," he continues "I would expect you to have grabbed a knife or something heavy. You're empty-handed. I don't know if you have a plan too good for me to think of, or if you are an idiot".

    Aziraphale closes his eyes and fist for a second and screams "I just needed some tea!!".

    Crowley is caught by surprise but doesn't move away.

    "I didn't break any rules" he says looking at him again "You said I could get out of the room if I needed. And I did. I can’t sleep well without some tea!".

    Aziraphale finishes screaming at Crowley and looks at him for a brief moment while fear takes over again.

    "This is it" he thinks.

    At that moment, all of his strength was holding some tears. He missed his library so much, it was his refuge on bad nights. The fear of not returning to his safe space was slowly breaking him. He sees Crowley starting to move and closes his eyes. To his surprise, Crowley didn’t bite him, he didn't wrap himself around him to hurt him. Aziraphale seemed to be telling the truth. He takes a deep breath and looks at the teapot behind him. Aziraphale hears nothing but silence for a few seconds but soon he hears Crowley’s voice again.

    "Go sit on the couch, I’ll bring you the tea in a second".

    After opening his eyes again, he sees Crowley distancing himself. He didn’t want Crowley to finish him the tea, he could have done it, but he was too scared to argue. He walks to the living room and sits on the couch like Crowley said. Aziraphale tries to get warm again but he had left the blanket on the kitchen floor. There was a fireplace in front of him, but it was empty. Crowley was getting a teacup ready when he saw the blanket on the floor. He looks to Aziraphale rubbing his hands on his arms and rolls his eyes.

    "Here" he says bringing him the blanket "You'll get sick if you get too cold".

    Aziraphale grabs it apprehensively. He didn't thank Crowley, he felt like he had used all the words he could. But he felt a little better after being surrounded by that warm blanket. Crowley eventually returns with the tea and leaves it on the coffee table. He sees Aziraphale picking up the teacup with his hands still trembling a bit. He did not look at Crowley, he didn't want to. Crowley leaves and Aziraphale takes a deep breath. He was about to start crying when Crowley returns one last time.

    "You left your book on the counter" he states scaring Aziraphale in the process. He turns his face away and rapidly wipes the tears that had already fallen. Crowley notices but doesn't mention it. A lot of people cry when they're scared, that's not new to him. But deep down he didn't want to make him cry. Aziraphale faces him again and picks up the book quietly. Crowley slithers away again, this time being followed by Aziraphale's eyes. When he's sure he's alone, Aziraphale holds his book close to his racing heart.

    "Not as bad as it could have been" he concludes "I'm still in one piece".

    Even knowing that, he still didn't feel safe. He gets a little more comfortable on the couch and dries his face again. At that moment he tries to focus on taking deep breaths and feeling the tea's warmth.

    Back in his room, Crowley is coiled up in his mattress, still thinking about what happened. He didn’t understand why anyone would stay there without trying to get out. It made him cautious around Aziraphale, he could try to end him before leaving. But the look on his face from just a few moments ago kept flashing before Crowley’s mind. He doesn’t seem to want to hurt anyone or anything.

    "Did he want tea that bad?" he mumbles before closing his eyes "Well, maybe this will be enough to scare him".

    Crowley would have shrugged his shoulders if he had any. After a while, his eyes open again. He could not fall asleep.

    "Since when is insomnia contagious?!" he growls.

    A small voice inside his head was telling him to go check on Aziraphale, but it was followed by a scream telling him to stay away. He ignored those voices and tried to fall asleep again eventually succeeding. He did wake up relatively early, the sun had only been out for a few minutes when he left his room. He wasn't sure what he would find but he saw Aziraphale's things still in his room. When he got to the living room, he found Aziraphale sleeping on the couch. He had seen him sleep once before, but this time he didn't seem as peaceful.

    He sees the teacup empty on the table and the blanket on the floor, it probably fell. After a few seconds of deliberation, Crowley decides to cover him with the blanket. He does so carefully not to wake him, the last thing he wants is to have anyone seeing him do that. After that, he sees the book open on the floor where the blanket was. Crowley didn’t move it and let Aziraphale continue to sleep.

    He spent that morning in the garden again, but today his mind wasn't in the right place. Even when he was paying attention to his plants, there would always be a voice on the back of his mind reminding him of Aziraphale. That voice was ignored obviously, until he returned to the house.

    When he got back in the house he went in the couch's direction to check on Aziraphale. To his surprise, he found Aziraphale still sleeping. After looking at him for a little bit, Crowley decides to get some lunch ready. When the smell of the food reaches Aziraphale's nose, he starts to wake up slowly. After a few minutes, he opens his eyes. After seeing the teacup on the table in front of him his brain tries to figure out what happened. It didn't take more than a few seconds for last night's memories to return to him. When he notices his situation, he bolts to his room almost tripping a couple of times. Crowley hears him get up but when he looks into the living room he hears Aziraphale's door shutting close. He gets surprised by Aziraphale's actions once again but returns to cooking right after.

    A few minutes later he hears the door opening again and looks back. Aziraphale is now wearing clothes other than his pajamas and stops moving as soon as he sees Crowley looking at him.

    "I forgot my book" he discloses and Crowley nods before resuming what he was doing.

    In his room, Aziraphale puts the book down and goes over what happened the previous night. When Crowley started to get close to him he believed he had no chance of getting away unscathed. But Crowley didn’t harm him, not physically at least, and that was unpredictable. It should be a good thing that Crowley decided to let him be, but being able to predict what could happen is certainly comforting.

    Aziraphale retraces everything trying to understand what's Crowley's plan. He ponders if it was an act of pity.

    "It might have been" he thinks, but that didn't make him feel better.

    Perhaps it was mercy? That's a more pleasant thought but seemed a little bit unlikely. After seeing the way Crowley treats his plants, Aziraphale doesn’t believe him to have much mercy in his heart. It could still be a part of a bigger plan. Fear is an effective way of controlling someone. That's the only thing keeping him there. But that didn't seem right either, if it was true he wouldn't have returned his blanket or book, or given him tea.

    Aziraphale couldn't find an explanation so he recaps everything from the beginning one more time. The fact that Crowley didn't close any of the doors was bothering Aziraphale. He doesn't know where that information leads. He previously thought that it could be some sort of test, but he doesn't seem to have the patience to make complex and long-lasting schemes.

    Suddenly an idea popped into his brain. Could it be that Crowley wanted him to leave? Aziraphale considers it but just for a couple of seconds. It was ludicrous, it almost made him laugh.

    "He just trusts that I fear him enough to not leave" Aziraphale sighs, but another idea emerges immediately after.

    If he doesn't fear Crowley he will win him at his own game. That's easier said than done, it's not like he can poof the fear away. But Aziraphale believes he can pretend well enough. He doesn't know what Crowley's response will be but he's sure something will change.

    A few minutes later he hears Crowley on the other side of the door asking if he can come in. Aziraphale straightens his clothes before opening the door. Crowley looks at him standing there with a serious but calm expression.

    "Yes?" Aziraphale asks.

    "Are you hungry? I made lunch".

    Aziraphale's face immediately lights up when he notices there's food in the conversation but he quickly tries to change it back.

    "I am. Should I go get it?".

    Crowley notices the change in his demeanor but decides not to address it.

    "I'll go get it".

    "Actually" Aziraphale says returning to his serious tone "I was wondering if I could eat at the table".

    Crowley looks at him again not understanding what his plan is.

    "Do you need to?" he asks emphasizing the "need".

    "I don't, that's why I asked".

    "Then no, you can't".

    Crowley looks at Aziraphale waiting curious for his response.

    "Very well" he says and walks inside the room.

    Crowley squints his eyes looking at him but slowly leaves to get his lunch. He doesn't understand what Aziraphale is doing.

    "He doesn't sound mad" he thinks "And he doesn't sound afraid either. But I know he is. Why is he acting like this then?".

    Crowley would understand fear and anger, those are the two options he's always gotten. He doesn't particularly like it, but there is comfort in things that stay the same. Having the constants of his life tempered with is not something he enjoys. Aziraphale isn't acting according to what he's feeling and Crowley knows that, he just doesn't know why. He grabs the lunch a little bit annoyed. When Aziraphale sees him return he notices the frowny face.

    "Thank you Crowley" Aziraphale says calmly.

    Crowley stays at the corner of the door watching him start to eat.

    "If you'd like to look at me while I eat you could have let me eat at the table" Aziraphale states leaving Crowley dumbfounded.

    "Hey" Crowley says getting closer "You can cut the passive-aggressive comments, this isn't a vacation".

    "I am perfectly aware it's not a vacation, I don't get yelled at by talking snakes when I'm enjoying my time off" Aziraphale responds before taking another bite.

    "I yell at whomever I want to, it's my fucking house!" he hisses "What do you think you'll get by being like this huh? You think you'll get home sooner? You think I'll be nicer to you? It won't happen, none of it".

    "Going home sooner means there's a date for my return and, as you said before, there is not. And being nicer means you have been nice to begin with" Aziraphale claims.

    He didn't want to escalate the situation and get into serious trouble, but he was determined to see where this will take him. Their eyes were locked, it had been a while since someone made Crowley's blood boil. But if he wants to succeed in that conversation he needs to clear his mind first. He takes a deep breath and Aziraphale can see his pupils getting thinner.

    "I'm not sure what you're playing at, but don't think you're fooling me. You can't hide your fear from me. I can sense it. So instead of acting like a cold long-faced bloke, why don't you tell me what it is that you want?".

    Aziraphale's expression was slowly showing his true feelings. Crowley could see his eyebrows shaking and eyes starting to water. He wasn't expecting to see his face getting possessed by rage.

    "I want to go home" he answers.

    "In one piece?" Crowley threatens.

    Aziraphale puts down his plate and looks at Crowley again with a serious face.

    "Your threats won't break me. You can try to scare me all you want, but I will return home. And if I can't escape you better let me go when that flower blooms. Because if you don't, you'll wish you did." he continues "You might be a giant snake but you are not immune to fear".

    "You think I'm afraid of you?" Crowley says almost laughing.

    "I know you're not. Not yet at least. But you underestimate me. You think you know me but you don't even know my name.".

    They stare into each other's eyes trying to read their thoughts.

    "Now, I'd appreciate it if you'd let me eat my lunch in peace, whether you do it because you are feeling bad for me, scared, or trying to make this living situation more manageable." Aziraphale says softly "And if you'd like, we could talk later".

    Crowley growls and leaves Aziraphale's room closing the door behind him.

    As soon as he leaves Aziraphale puts his trembling hands on his chest. His heart was beating so fast he felt light-headed. He leans his head to the wardrobe by his side with his eyes closed. He couldn't believe he managed to talk like that to Crowley. He was terrified. But once again, Crowley didn't hurt him. Aziraphale wanted to lay in bed for a bit but he couldn't get up. He stays on that chair feeling like time stopped allowing him to calm down.

    Crowley left the house and went to the garden. He didn't work in the garden, just wandered around trying to blow some steam. He was so mad he dug a hole and crawled inside to enjoy the darkness of the underground.

    "Why do I put myself in this type of situation?" he grumbles "I should just scare him off once and for all. Lock him in his room, and stop cooking for him like I'm his personal chef".

    He keeps revisiting Aziraphale's words. From what he said, Crowley concluded he was already planning an escape. The question is what should he do while he's still there. He can try to ignore him, it would be less work, but if he keeps on pushing Aziraphale he may leave faster.

    They both decide to wait a few hours, clearing their minds before talking with each other. Both of them kept analyzing each other's actions, trying to figure out what plans were hidden in the smallest of details. The truth is they're not very good at that. They may be able to find all the clues, but putting them together to uncover the truth was the hard part. When Crowley is feeling calmer he gets inside and knocks on Aziraphale's door.

    "Do you want to talk now?" he asks.

    The door opens and he notices Aziraphale's eyes are red. "Where would you like to talk?" he asks calmly.

    Crowley suggests going to the dining room table and Aziraphale follows him there. They both sit down on opposite sides of the table not knowing how the conversation will go.

Author's note

     Here's chapter 4 of "The Serpent's carnations"! Our two ineffable cuties are fighting, but who knows what that talk will do? I actually really liked to write the arguments, their pettiness gives me life sometimes. What do you think? I hope you enjoyed it! And I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes, English is not my first language. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading!

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 5

    After a few long seconds of silence, Aziraphale starts to talk.

    "I'm not sure where to start but I would like to ask you a few questions" he says nervously trying to find the right words.

    "Go on" answers Crowley.

    "Are you planning on eating me?".

    Crowley would have choked if he had been drinking at that moment. He tried to remain calm and answered a short "No".

    Aziraphale kept on fidgeting with his fingers while trying to maintain a serious stance.

    "As you may have noticed, I occasionally have trouble sleeping. Would it be ok if I came to the kitchen to make some tea those nights?".

    Crowley takes a few seconds to deliberate and eventually agrees. Aziraphale sighs in relief knowing he'll have an easier time sleeping from now on.

    "Thank you" he says looking at Crowley who replies "I also have a question".

    Aziraphale nods and waits.

    "Why haven't you tried to escape yet?".

    "You said I had to stay here" Aziraphale mutters but Crowley interrupts him.

    "Let me rephrase my question. I know you're planning an escape. We both know that, there's no need to hide that fact anymore. What is it that you’re waiting for?".

    Aziraphale stays still for a few seconds regretting some of the things he said earlier.

    "It does not concern you" he answers having a hard time keeping eye contact "You know I'm not going to explain it to you. Why are you asking me that?".

    "You can say that I'm curious.".

    Aziraphale takes a moment to think before looking at Crowley again.

    "If I can escape successfully" Aziraphale stutters "How long will you follow me?".

    "Wouldn't you like to know" he answers smirking.

    It was the first time he saw Crowley do anything close to smiling, but it only made him more anxious. He still had a question he wanted to ask but in that instant, his brain felt foggy. His focus returns shortly after and he looks away to prepare his last question. Crowley looks at him curious, waiting to hear his voice again.

    "If I follow the rules" Aziraphale says hesitantly "You won't hurt me right?".

    Crowley looks at him trying his best to keep a brave face on. It would be easy to scare him, he just needs to get closer and make him question his safety a little more. But Crowley couldn't stop looking at those blue eyes. They were working so hard not to show fear, even if he could still feel it. He found it mesmerizing to watch. Aziraphale sees Crowley's smirk slowly fade away but no answer. He feels frozen in place, not being able to move while Crowley's eyes are locked in his.

    "Is he reading my mind?" Aziraphale thinks "I hope he can't do that".

    Crowley does not have that ability, but even if he did he would not be able to read anything. His thoughts were being too loud. Some were screaming at him to get it over with. Some others were asking him to be patient. And as if that wasn't enough to get Crowley indecisive, another voice was increasingly getting louder. It was Crowley's curiosity, repeating questions over and over again and demanding answers. His head felt like it was going to explode at any moment but soon he heard an outside voice as well.

    "Just tell me what I have to do to be safe" Aziraphale pleads "Do you want me to cook? I can do that".

    He starts to ramble trying to get an answer out of Crowley, not knowing that his voice was adding to all the noise. His mind was running faster than he could process.

    "I don't need you to do anything" he growls looking once again at Aziraphale. He freezes in place looking at Crowley's eyes. In the silence, he notices Crowley's extremely thin pupils getting a bit more relaxed. He takes a deep breath as his mind starts to get clearer and quieter.

    "I don't need you to cook or clean" he states as calmly as he can "As long as you follow the rules and don't stretch them in the directions you'd like, I won't hurt you".

    Aziraphale nods his head in agreement and stays quiet. Crowley sighs and gets off the table.

    "I'm going to my room, you should probably go to yours as well" he declares.

    Aziraphale leaves the table soon after hearing the bedroom door closing.

    It has been a stressful day for both of them, some time apart will probably do them good. They only saw each other one more time that day when Crowley brought him dinner. A few words were exchanged but there wasn't a proper conversation. 

    Later at night, Crowley took a bit more than usual to fall asleep, his mind wasn't completely silent but it had calmed down by the time he went to bed. Aziraphale stayed up late reading his book. He couldn't sleep again but was still too afraid to go get a warm cup of tea.

    "I'll go tomorrow if I need to" he reassures himself.

    He was not going to avoid it for long, just that night. Even with all that trouble, he still managed to get a few hours of sleep.

    In the morning he wakes up and senses something different. He stretches a bit underneath the bedsheets and when he opens his eyes he sees something on the bedside table. He could smell food and when his vision got clearer he saw a plate with some toast and some tea still steaming. He rolls over and without leaving the warmth of the bed he eats his breakfast. Having breakfast in bed is not a luxury he gets to enjoy often, and even if the circumstances aren't ideal it still feels good. He did feel a bit sad that he didn't get to thank Crowley.

    "I'll do it when I see him" he thinks smiling a bit.

    After eating he gets changed and looks out the window. Crowley was not outside, at least not where he could see him. The sky was cloudy but it wasn't going to rain. He needs a storm, that's how he'll get out, but there is nothing he can do to affect the weather. He sits down by the window and decides to draw a bit on his sketchbook. Looking around to find inspiration, he starts sketching one of the plants in the room.

    After a while, Aziraphale started to feel more at peace. He was not happy but at that moment he didn't feel anxious either. All that his mind was thinking about were the lines of the drawing, nothing else mattered. After the sketch was made he continued to add details here and there, refining the shapes and shading the leaves. Time flies while he's focused, so when Crowley knocks on his door he's surprised.

    "Who is it?" he asks instinctively.

    "Who the fuck do you think it is?" he hears from the other side of the door.

    "Sorry" he responds a bit embarrassed and goes to open the door.

    He sees the plate of food on Crowley's head and smiles. Aziraphale grabs the plate and thanks him.

    "And thank you for the breakfast too".

    "It's not a big deal, I had to leave the house and didn't want to wake you so I just left it there".

    "Where did you go?" Aziraphale asks unsure if he is going to get an answer.

    "To get more food of course".

    Crowley notices Aziraphale looking at his plate apprehensive.

    "There's no need to get concerned, it's normal food. I get it from the village down the street".

    Aziraphale hadn't thought about the logistics yet, it never occurred to him to think about where that food was coming from. Crowley didn't seem to be lying, and the food hadn't been weird in any way, shape, or form.

    "Were you by the window?" Crowley asks seeing that Aziraphale moved the chair.

    "Yes, I find it to be a good place to draw".

    "Oh, that's nice. I'll leave you to it then".

    He leaves as he finishes the sentence and Aziraphale stays in his room savoring his lunch. He thought a bit about the plan that evening. If Crowley left the house again he could use that as an opportunity. But it's hard to know when he's not at home. He agreed it would still be a good idea to wait for a storm. They are loud enough for him to leave the house at night unnoticed, or at least he hoped so.

    That day wasn't eventful, but at night he went to the kitchen to have a nice cup of tea before bed.

    "It will be okay" he reassured himself "He said I could".

    He made as little noise as humanly possible, but his heart was beating loudly. He kept looking over his shoulder, afraid to be caught off guard by Crowley again. It was hard to avoid feeling nervous, every time he had to turn away from the kitchen's entrance he would feel the hairs on his neck rising. But nothing happened that night, Aziraphale returned to his bedroom without encountering Crowley. When he sat in bed he took a deep breath and felt some of the fear he felt leave his body. And Crowley felt that.

    It was something minuscule, very hard to notice, but it was enough to interrupt his sleep. He raises his head and looks around not knowing what had waken him so abruptly. He couldn't feel anything different as it wasn't any significant change. But in his subconscious, he felt it. Someone's fear starting to fade does not happen every day. Or week. Or year. He checked his bedroom and nothing had changed, but he still felt uneasy. He checked around the house and nothing seemed odd or suspicious. “Weird” he thinks returning to bed. He coils up assuming it might have been just a dream he does not remember having. It didn't feel exactly like it, he usually remembers his dreams, but he was too tired to think about it.

    Over the next few days, Aziraphale started to get used to this new routine. He tried to make the most of the situation while trying to stay safe until his plan is set in motion. He would spend his mornings reading or drawing. At lunch time he and Crowley would exchange a few remarks. In the afternoon he would look out the window to check the weather and then spend a bit more time drawing or reading before night came. Sometimes he would see Crowley in the garden outside, but he never opened the window to talk to him. To end the day he would grab a cup of tea in the kitchen.

    Crowley started to notice that things weren't changing. Constants tend to bring him peace but strangely he was not enjoying that. It's not that he hated what his days had turned into. He didn't mind cooking for Aziraphale, and he didn't mind the short conversations they had. But there was something ominous about that routine. Crowley didn't allow himself to get comfortable, he knew he couldn't do it. He knew deep down that Aziraphale was not a new constant that he had to get used to. Eventually, he would leave, and constants don't do that, they don't change.

    People usually are more than just stagnant beings, they learn and grow and change. But to him, they were all the same. He knew how everyone would react to seeing him, he knew what everyone thought about him. It was always the same. Even when they would enter his garden, he knew they wouldn't last long in his house. They would stay there frightened for a bit but run away at the first opportunity. They are always consistent, but Aziraphale is not. He's been there for around a week and Crowley still has no way of predicting what he will do.

    In the beginning, he thought Aziraphale would stay there until he let him leave which is already confusing. But now he knows he has some sort of plan to leave. Aziraphale was not standing still like an object, but he also was not behaving exactly like other people. Deliberately staying there, making complicated plans, going to get tea instead of leaving, all of that made no sense. Especially the fact that Aziraphale fears him and keeps talking to him regardless, sometimes he even does it smiling. Crowley couldn't comprehend or foresee Aziraphale's actions. Perhaps the only constant with Aziraphale was that.

    The next day, when Crowley was bringing him lunch he noticed Aziraphale lying in bed.

    "I have your lunch here" he mentions getting closer.

    Aziraphale sits and thanks him but he doesn't seem to be doing well.

    Crowley's curiosity awakes and he tries to investigate what's happening.

    "Are you not hungry?" he asks.

    "Oh, it's not that" Aziraphale responds "I just-".

    He pauses his sentence and stares sadly at the floor. Crowley didn't know what to expect. Maybe something has gone wrong with his plan.

    "I finished my book" he says looking gloomy.

    Crowley is taken again by surprise.

    "Was it a bad ending or something?" he questions confused as to why that would be a bad thing.

    "On the contrary, it was marvelous. But when I came I only took one book with me and now that I finished it I don't have any other book to read".

    Aziraphale looks at Crowley, who is still trying to understand why he is so stressed about a book, and corrects his posture.

    "It's not a big deal, this is not supposed to be a vacation anyway" he says getting ready to eat.

    "You're right, it’s not" Crowley says distracted, lost in some thoughts.

    He leaves the room without closing the door and Aziraphale eats his lunch. He knew sooner or later he would read the last pages of that story, but staying there without a book to read would be hard. When he's finishing his meal he hears some noise outside and Crowley complaining about something. He gets up to go check what happened but before he reaches the door he sees Crowley popping in.

    "Good, you're done already. Come here".

    Aziraphale follows him quietly until he notices they're going into his room.

    "Is it okay for me to go in there?" he asks apprehensive.

    "Yeah, just don't start touching everything".

    That was the only room in the house he hadn't seen yet. He didn't know what to expect from a snake's room, they usually don't have houses. But that room looked almost like it belonged to a person. There was a desk with a bookshelf on each side. There were plants, a few notebooks, small rocks, and other knick-knacks decorating the shelves. There was a big frame with a map of the stars on the left wall and there was a globe hiding behind the door. Nothing out of the ordinary, Aziraphale quite liked the look of the room. There was only one thing that was odd but made perfect sense. Underneath a big window, there should be a bed, but there was only a mattress on the floor with a few blankets. He sees Crowley next to an open door on the bottom of the bookshelf.

    "These don't seem like the type of book you were reading but maybe they'll do".

    Aziraphale gets close and his eyes light up when he sees a bunch of dusty old books.

    "I didn't know you had books, I didn't know you could-" he stops mid-sentence and looks away from Crowley a little embarrassed "I didn't know you liked books, what are they about?".

    "Haven't touched them in a while, but they're mostly about science from what I remember".

    "Do you mind if I take a couple of them?".

    "You can take them all for all I care" Crowley says going in the direction of his bed.

    "Really?" Aziraphale responds excitedly "Oh, thank you. I'm sure there's something good to read among these".

    He coils up in his bed and looks at Aziraphale who just sat down on the floor picking up the books one by one to take a look at them. He notices Crowley looking at him and notices he is still in his room.

    "Sorry, I'll take them to my room and check them out there" he says a bit flustered, and piles all the books.

    He smiles at Crowley again before leaving and in that moment he feels something changing. Inside his brain, in a compartment somewhere, he could track how everyone felt about him. It isn't a science, there's no measuring scale, but he can still clearly understand how things work regarding that. And in that moment he felt Aziraphale's feelings change. He still feared him, but not as much as before. It struck him like lightning, all he could feel was his heart racing. He crawls inside his blankets and hides.

    "No no no no no" he repeats continuously to himself.

    He couldn't stop moving underneath the covers, like a dog trying to find the right place to sleep. He didn't know how to process that, but once again Aziraphale left him too stunned to speak.

    "That's it" he thinks "If something like this happens again he will be running out of here".

Author's note

     Here's chapter 5 of "The Serpent's carnations"! We're starting to have some cute moments in the story, but things don't seem to be going well for Crowley. Do you think Aziraphale will like the books? I hope you enjoyed it! And I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes, English is not my first language. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 6

    After taking off most of the dust from the books, Aziraphale sat down and started to read the titles on the spines of the books. They were all about science like Crowley had said but they covered different themes. There were books about medicine, astronomy, chemistry, biology, among others. It was hard to choose but after seeing that framed image in Crowley's room he decided to start with one of the astrology books. It had some illustrations throughout the pages and talked about the moon, planets, and stars.

    After a few minutes of reading, he stumbled upon a half-erased drawing. It immediately caught Aziraphale's attention, it seemed to have been drawn by a kid. It was a small sick figure next to a shooting star illustration. It made Aziraphale think that those books may have belonged to a kid. He starts to think about the history of that house again. The books are dated to over 40 years ago and they seemed to have been stored for a couple of decades at the bare minimum. He could not resist a mystery, so he decided to go through the books to see if he could find any other information.

    There were a couple more doodles in the astrology one, sometimes next to illustrations, other times in the corner of the pages, but they all had been erased to some degree. There were also a few notes spread around the pages, and most of these were intact. They added information occasionally, but sometimes it was just observations like "I saw this constellation last night" or "Need a telescope to see this one". Aziraphale found it curious.

    "This kid really liked stars" he thinks wondering what happened to them.

    Maybe Crowley got these books with the notes already written in them, they could have been from a school. But it seemed most likely that the books belonged to the house already. But a kid wouldn't live there alone. Aziraphale starts to analyze all the clues trying to put them together. The empty picture frame, the glasses, the pocket watch, the clothes, everything he had found pointed in the direction that it was a family house. That made Aziraphale think of two possibilities. Crowley could have found that house already empty. But the opposite could also be true. Aziraphale didn't know how to feel about that, he wasn't even sure if he wanted to solve that mystery as he would leave in a matter of days. Having more questions than answers would certainly bother him even after he left.

    "I might as well investigate while I'm here" he decides after pondering for a few minutes.

    He adjusts his glasses and dives deep into the books looking for more clues.

    Later that night Crowley brought him dinner as usual. He saw that Aziraphale was holding a biology book about plants.

    He put the book down to eat and asked Crowley "Have you read all these books?".

    "I have".

    "How long ago was that?".

    "I don't know, why do you care?" he answers a bit snappy.

    "I just wanted to know if you have a recommendation" Aziraphale lies.

    He didn't care about a recommendation, but he didn't want Crowley to know his true intentions.

    "You can look through the index and find an interesting topic".

    "Thank you, I'll do that" he answers smiling.

    "You know you don't have to read them right?".

    "I know, but I always like to have a new book close by".

    "Just-" he says stopping mid-sentence to find the right words "Don't take those books when you leave, they are still mine".

    The look he gives Aziraphale makes his smile fade away.

    "I wouldn't dare take anything from you" he replies a bit nervous.

    Crowley didn't raise his voice when he talked, and he didn't get close to him either. He didn't seem to be trying to scare him like he had done previously, but there was something threatening about what he said. But together with that menacing undertone, Aziraphale senses some concern. Crowley didn't seem to love books, and those had been stored away for a long time, but he appeared to care about them to some degree. Aziraphale didn't want to take those books with him back home, but now he feels like he needs to be extra careful handling them.

    After Crowley left the room Aziraphale ate his dinner quietly. He ended up going through a few more of the books that night. He didn't have a specific method of organization, he just browsed through the pages taking notes of everything he found. He would occasionally stop to read parts of the books that grabbed his attention. The notes and doodles had all been very similar so far, they seemed to have been made by the same kid in all the books. He didn't get to read them all, but he decided to go to sleep after a nice cup of tea. He layed on the bed feeling calm. A lot was going on but nothing that would stop his plan from working. He knew it would be best to rest and wake up with a refreshed mind to work on this mystery.

    Crowley on the other hand was having a bit of trouble falling asleep. Aziraphale didn't leave his mind for a single second. He could see him anytime his eyes closed, he could see him clearly. He tried to at least focus on the moments that felt right but his mind kept projecting that smile over every memory. Once again he could not stay still. He wandered the house for some time to try and think of something else. He reorganized some shelves, there weren't many things out of place but he likes to have everything properly placed. He did the same in his room since he moved some stuff earlier to find the books. It was only after he finished that he was able to get some rest.

    When they woke up the next morning the sky was grey. Aziraphale smiled as soon as he noticed it, the perfect moment for his escape was approaching. Crowley on the other hand wasn't very pleased with the weather. He does not particularly like the cold, and he certainly doesn't like storms. Most years he spends the colder months hibernating, but it's still a bit too early for that. He spends most of the day in the garden to take care of his plants while he can. They know how to behave while he's gone during winter, but that doesn't mean he can just let them do whatever they want. It is crucial for him to do his best too.

    While he spent his day in the garden, Aziraphale continued to investigate. There wasn't anything new, just similar notes and scribbles, he felt like they didn't lead anywhere. That changed as soon as he opened one of the medicine books.

    There were a few notes but they surely hadn't been written by a child. The handwriting was different, and the themes of the book were not kid-friendly. Some kids go to his library, and he's always encouraging them to read about the most diverse topics. He believes that knowledge is an incredible tool, and if a kid is curious about something, then they're better off reading about it. With that being said, some things just aren't meant for kids. And that book in particular was one of those things. It described treatments and medical procedures. They weren't cruel or wrong, Aziraphale had enough knowledge to realize that, but that level of detail is only useful for doctors or those trying to become doctors. The notes spread throughout the pages indicated tips, changes, and results. After paying close attention, Aziraphale noticed that the notes weren't just from one person. There were two distinctive handwritings. Inside his brain, those pieces start to fit in the right places.

    "This must have been the kid's parents" he thinks.

    It made sense. Doctors, especially the ones who successfully achieve such complicated feats, would have a good house. It isn't a mansion or a castle, but it is an elegant house filled with exceptional furniture and decorations. They were also able to provide an academic education to their child, even if those books don't teach everything. He continued reading and seeing if any note would provide more information. Eventually, he did.

    "The venom works better" was written next to a paragraph about different anesthetics.

    Upon reading the word "venom" he can't stop but wonder if it's somehow related to Crowley. But how would that be? Is he venomous? Did he work with the doctors? His brain flods with questions and his heartbeat gets louder. He feels an invisible force slowly weighing on him. Something is not right. He puts the book down and gets up taking a few steps back. Those four words shouldn't have made him feel that level of uneasiness. He stops reading for a bit, he gets his mind off that matter. There isn't much to do inside the room, so he takes a moment to look through the window, occasionally seeing a few drops of rain hitting the glass. When he was feeling better, he opened his notebook and looked at all the information he had written.

    "There was a kid here, living with their parents who were most likely doctors. And at some point, they started to use venom as a medication" Aziraphale thinks trying to see if that makes sense or not.

    He felt confident in those convictions, the only parts he couldn't quite fit regarded Crowley and the venom. He takes a deep breath and flips the pages of that book until the end. No more clues. The uncertainty still lingered in the room. He decided he should continue tomorrow and take the rest of the day to think.

    Later that day, when Crowley brought him dinner, he noticed something was off about Aziraphale.

    "Do you not like the food?".

    "I do, why do you ask?" he responds a bit nervous.

    "No reason".

    His curiosity was pushing him to ask for more answers, but he refused. Crowley was not the only one trying to avoid asking questions though. Aziraphale's curiosity only grew, but he knew better than to interrogate Crowley. Neither of them said anything after that, Crowley left the room and Aziraphale stayed. He ate his dinner quietly, his brain was still trying to process everything. Deep down he knew that the truth would remain a secret, it was a matter of what he would choose to believe. He still wanted to get as much information as possible, a mystery is only fun when trying to solve it and uncover the truth. He looked at the pages of his notebook where he had taken note of all the clues and details and just sat in bed thinking. He would occasionally glance at the stack of books on the bedside table.

    "This won't get me too far, so I better go to bed" he thinks.

    Because of his escape plan, he knew he needed to sleep to not be tired when the moment came. So he went to grab his tea and returned to his bedroom after feeling sleepy. That feeling unfortunately faded away after some time tossing and turning in bed. He would open his eyes and see the pile of books next to him. He would close them again and see the pages he read vividly.

    Against his best judgment, he picked the next book off the pile. He hadn't paid that much attention to all the books, but that one made him wake up easily. All he could see with the moonlight coming from the window was a big title "A Herpetology Study: everything there is to know about snakes". His eyes opened wide, then he squinted at the book knowing that it must be filled to the brim with important information. He looked closer at the book, almost mad that it for not jumping to his attention earlier when he had a fresh mind and good light to read. When he looked at the spines of the books, it only had written "A Herpetology Study" so he didn’t immediately associate it with snakes.

    "You'll keep me up all night won't you?" he mutters at the book.

    He gets up to get the candle and lights it close enough to illuminate the pages. The book could be completely empty, with no notes added. It could also have just simple additions, but that seemed unlikely. In Aziraphale's heart, he could feel the answers hiding inside the book, at least he hoped there were answers. Little did he know what was coming. Answers aren't always what we wish they'd be.

    After a few introduction pages, the book was divided into chapters, each of them approaching a different topic. After a brief look at the index, he found chapters about snakes' behavior, like how they regulate their temperature and their eating habits, but there were also anatomy chapters, some about their eyesight, shedding of their skin, and their venom too. Still eager to know more, Aziraphale starts looking for notes after a quick yawn. The first one he found was in the chapter "Ectothermia". Snakes are cold-blooded animals, Aziraphale already knew that, and that chapter covered that theme in depth. The note was close to the beginning, and he recognized the handwriting from the medicine book.

    "Day 36 - started to show difficulty to stay warm" and a little further in that chapter "Day 148 - he's now fully ectothermic".

    Aziraphale's enthusiasm started to turn into apprehension. Some more pages ahead, when the topic of hibernation came up, another note was written.

    "Day 219 - cannot stay awake for long" and right under it "Day 258 - staying close to the fireplace helps to stay conscient".

    There were plenty of annotations, more than he could count. He wrote them all trying to keep some chronologically organized, but that feeling of apprehension soon turned into concern.

    "Day 78 - shedded for the first time".

    "Day 312 - can now use the tongue to smell".

    "Day 412 - does not require food daily".

    "Day 545 - the venom is not deadly".

    Aziraphale's heart was beating faster with every word.

    "Day 731 - immunity to venom confirmed"

    "Day 964 - teeth regrow rapidly"

    "Day 1079 - vision is now bichromatic"

    "Day 1270 - can see heat signatures"

    His hands were starting to tremble. Should he be reading that? It felt invasive, the things written in that book did not concern him. But the fear of what he could read next did not stop him from continuing.

    "Day 1569 - cannot stay conscious with cold"

    "Day 1793 - venom can be taken weekly"

    "Day 1901 - shedding is occurring less often"

    "Day 2344 - the subject can use constriction, a stronger enclosure will be needed soon"

    He closes the book and tosses it away from him. The book was lying on the bed and Aziraphale stared at it for a few moments. His thoughts were tangled in each other making it hard to think clearly. The only thing he could take away from that confusion was an overwhelming feeling of dread. His eyes were burning, they were tired, but he could only keep them wide open. He questioned what or who the book was talking about. Could it be about Crowley? It might, the book is in his house after all. But for some reason, Aziraphale didn't want that to be true. There were too many questions he did not have the answers for.

    With his legs a bit shaky, he walks to the window and opens it. He closes his teary eyes and takes a few deep breaths. It was cold and dark outside but he needed some fresh air. He rests his hands on the window frame and opens his eyes. The sky was dark, he couldn't see the moon or the stars. A storm will come soon, he can't be exhausted when that happens.

    "More tea" he mumbles "I think more tea will help".

    Without giving it much thought, Aziraphale slowly closes the window and walks to the kitchen to get his second cup of tea for the night. As he was nearly finished, he was scared by a voice behind him.

    "Can't sleep?" Crowley asks entering the room.

    He did not sound angry, but Aziraphale was not looking forward to interacting with him that night. He nods positively and tries to keep his composure but after seeing Crowley his heart starts racing again. Crowley didn’t know what had happened. He heard Aziraphale going to the kitchen again and found it odd so he decided to go take a look. He did not expect to find him making tea again with anxiety coursing through his body. He wasn't sure if it was his fault for catching him by surprise, but it didn't seem to be. It was late, there were only a few hours left until dawn, so he either had a nightmare or something was keeping him awake.

    "I just came to check if you were running away. Since you're just making tea I'll leave you to it".

    Crowley starts to slither away a bit tired but is stopped by Aziraphale's voice.

    "Do you want tea?" he asks nervously.

    Crowley turns his head around looking at that scared figure. Aziraphale's offer didn't seem to come from a place of generosity. He was worried. More than that, he was distressed, shaken to his core. The words he spoke were certainly hard to voice. He does not particularly enjoy being near Crowley, but somehow, at that moment being alone was worse. After reading those books, he saw Crowley in a different light. He didn't know if the book actually referred to him, he wasn't completely sure what the book context was in general. All he knew was how it made him feel and all he got were more questions. Crowley had the answers that Aziraphale didn't dare to ask for. He knew he would not get any information even if he asked for it, but being close to someone who knows is reassuring. Like being lost with someone who has a map but won't share it. It's better than being lost alone.

    "I would, thank you" Crowley says returning to the kitchen.

    Aziraphale pours another cup and puts both on the small kitchen table.

    "It's still very hot" Aziraphale warns.

    They stay quiet for a bit until Crowley hesitantly asks "Was it a nightmare?".

    Aziraphale's eyes look up at him and turn down again as he thinks of an answer.

    "Something like that" he says.

    After picking the right words, Crowley claims "I'm sure the nightmares will go away once you leave".

    Aziraphale takes a deep breath and thanks him.

    "I'm sorry I woke you up" he says after taking a sip of his tea.

    "Don't worry about it".

    Crowley watched as Aziraphale enjoyed his tea. They both stay there for a while finding comfort in the silence.

Author's note

     Here's chapter 6 of "The Serpent's carnations"! Today's chapter is filled with lore! Do you think our detective Aziraphale will uncover this mystery before leaving? I hope you enjoyed it! I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes, English is not my first language. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 7

    Aziraphale wakes up after having slept for at least a couple of hours. He hears a soft knock on the door and lifts his head. He sees Crowley slowly coming in but he stops when he sees Aziraphale is awake.

    "Sorry, didn't know you were awake" he says going back.

    "It's alright, you can come in".

    Aziraphale sits on the bed and Crowley gets inside the room with breakfast.

    "Thank you" Aziraphale says after smelling the fresh warm toast.

    Crowley puts the food on the side table and Aziraphale stretches a bit.

    "Did you sleep well?" Crowley asked a bit hesitantly "No more nightmares?".

    "I slept well, thank you for asking" Aziraphale responds letting out a smile "And thank you for keeping me company last night".

    "Had to make sure you weren't running away" he claims.

    "I'm still here so you're doing a great job" Aziraphale says picking up the plate.

    They were both lying and they knew that. Aziraphale knew he didn't stay with him to prevent him from running away, and Crowley knew he wasn't doing a good job at keeping him there.

    "I should get going" he says after watching Aziraphale take a bite of the toast "You behave yourself, alright? I have better things to do than making sure you're not breaking any rules".

    He exits the room as he speaks leaving Aziraphale alone again. He eats sitting in bed again and his mind starts to wonder. He's unsure if the things he read were completely real or if he was too tired and his imagination filled in the gaps. After eating and getting dressed he walks in the books' direction. He picks up the book uncertain if he should look at it again. After a deep breath, he sets up his investigation station. He had his notebook, a pencil, and the book that took away his sleep.

    "I'm sure it's not as bad as it seemed yesterday" he reassures himself before opening the book again.

    With a clear and rested mind, Aziraphale spent the morning going over the book and checking his notes to make sure he had registered everything in the right place. He tried to look at the facts objectively instead of filling in the gaps with his imagination. He ended up closing the book and putting it away with the others. When Crowley knocked at the door a while later he was writing his thoughts to sort them out.

    "You writing your escape plan?" Crowley mocks him.

    Aziraphale holds his notes against his chest.

    "What if I am? The rules don't say I cannot write" he states.

    Crowley squints his eyes at him trying to understand if he's actually writing a plan. Aziraphale looks at him nervously while holding the pages close to him.

    "Can I see what you're writing?" he asks.

    "No" Aziraphale answers firmly.

    "Hmmm" he thinks "Just don't try anything stupid".

    Crowley leaves Aziraphale, who sighs. He doesn't want Crowley to know what he found in the books, one of the rules is that he can't be snooping around after all. He eats thinking about the information he has. At first glance, some notes seemed to be normal annotations for someone who has a pet snake, like how often they shed. And the comments about venom seemed to align with the fact that these people were doctors. Aziraphale knew that sometimes snake venom could be used for medications so it didn't seem out of place. But other notes had weird time indications. They implied that some of the characteristics of a snake weren't there from the start.

    Aziraphale didn't want to be involved in a mystery as bizarre as this, but now that he's aware something big happened there he can't just quit. He doesn't know many snakes, not proper snakes that is, but Crowley definitely stands out. He can talk, which is already surprising, but he also lives in a house and takes an interest in very human activities like gardening. He found it strange from the start but didn't have time or reason to question it. But that information is now important to Aziraphale's investigation. Crowley being the one who the book refers to could make sense, that is if logic had suddenly been replaced by absurd concepts. Aziraphale gets up and looks out the window looking for Crowley.

    "Did he turn into a snake?" he questions "It’s lunacy, how would that even happen".

    He didn't see Crowley outside, he was probably somewhere else in the garden. What he did see were some heavy clouds slowly approaching.

    "It doesn't matter anyway, I'll be leaving soon" he confidently states as he leaves the window side.

    That night, before going to bed, Aziraphale organized most of his belongings inside his bag. He knew a storm would come at any moment, he needed to be ready. Sleeping was difficult, he could not rest his mind. As soon as he was close to falling asleep his eyes would open in fear of losing his chance.

    "I'll wake up if the storm comes" he convinces himself.

    Some more tries later, he ends up falling into a light sleep. His ears stayed alert all night but they didn't hear anything out of the ordinary. It started to drizzle in the morning before Aziraphale woke up. He hears the water drops softly hit the glass and stretches for a could of seconds before opening his eyes. He turns around and looks out the window. Almost. He gets up and dressed before Crowley knocks at the door. It was his breakfast, as usual.

    "Any plans for the day" Aziraphale asks after thanking him.

    "I'll be outside, there's plenty of work to be done" Crowley answers still a little bit sleepy.

    "But it's raining" Aziraphale comments "Don't you mind the rain?".

    "I don't love it when it gets too cold. But no, I don't mind the rain".

    Aziraphale waits for Crowley to leave. As soon as he hears the outside door open he finishes packing his bag. While putting his stuff away, he catches a glimpse of Crowley's books. He picks them up still intrigued and sighs, Aziraphale is aware he won't get the answers he wants. Even if he took the books, they don't have what he needs to figure out that story. He decides to leave them organized on the bedside table. Aziraphale sits impatient, waiting for the rain to get stronger and louder. He could feel his heart beating faster. He gets up and looks out the window. Crowley was there, at least part of him. He seemed to be looking at the back part of the garden.

    "He can't see the front gate" Aziraphale mutters as he paces around the room.

    He could feel the adrenaline rushing through his body. It starts to pour outside, sooner than he was prepared.

    "Now's my chance" he says gathering all of his courage.

    He puts on his coat and looks outside again. Crowley looked the same, he did not seem to have moved much since he last checked on him. He picks up his bag and grabs the door handle of his bedroom.

    "I just need to run down the street" he thinks trying to convince himself that it was as simple as that.

    He isn't too fond of running, but he surely could make an exception. He could hear his heart together with his thoughts. They were asking him not to do it, it was too dangerous, he wouldn't be able to escape safe and sound. But Aziraphale knew he had to try sooner or later. He was prepared to ignore those thoughts. From the moment he made the plan, he knew he was going to be terrified, and he was ready to push them aside. But an unexpected voice emerged inside his mind. He found himself stuck in place, not being able to touch the door and run for his life.

    "He cannot stay conscious with cold" that voice reads from the notes of the book "He cannot stay awake for long".

    Aziraphale could hear his heart, he could feel every beat shaking him. For a split second, he got worried about Crowley. He shook his head trying to get those ideas out of his head.

    "Crowley is fine. He knows what he's doing. And it's not my responsibility anyway" he whispers with his hand out ready to grab the handle "And I didn't wait all this time to break the rules to go help him".

    He was determined, he could not stay there any longer, and his library was waiting for him. Why is it then that he can't bring himself to open the door?

    Crowley was trying to remove some weeds from the garden, but he didn't expect the rain to get that heavy. He couldn't see very well but he wanted to finish that part at least, he could rest in the afternoon and wait for the storm to pass. It was getting a bit too cold for his liking, but he was almost done anyway. As he was going to the last part, he felt something changing. It was the same as when he gave Aziraphale the books, the same change. After a few seconds of silence, he heard something. He slowly lifts his head and starts to slither to the front of the house where the noise came from. Hidden behind his plants, he sees Aziraphale leaving the house. But that was not what he had heard.

    "Crowley?" he calls approaching the garden.

    Crowley is too stunned to do anything so Aziraphale gets closer to the garden. He was holding an umbrella but it was broken to the point of uselessness.

    "Crowley? Where are you?" he asks again.

    He comes back to his senses and shows himself in front of Aziraphale.

    "What do you think you're doing?" he asks angrily.

    "Oh, Crowley" he answers a bit relieved, and tries to cover him with the umbrella "It's cold out here. And it's pouring, for heaven's sake, you should-".

    "Get in the house" he demands interrupting Aziraphale.

    "I just-".

    "Get in the house, now!" he repeats yelling.

    Aziraphale looks at him and takes back the umbrella. He takes a few steps back before turning and entering the house again. Crowley gets in right after, slamming the front door behind him. Aziraphale looks at him moving rapidly in his direction.

    "What were you doing outside?" he hisses.

    "I was checking on you" Aziraphale says walking backward trying to avoid obstacles "You were out there in the rain for a long time. I saw you through the window and something felt off".

    "Were you spying on me?".

    Aziraphale hits the wall and moves to the side following the hallway.

    "I was not spying on you, it just happened that I looked outside".

    He reaches his bedroom and gets in trembling from fear and the cold rain on his clothes. Crowley enters the room right after and sees his bag.

    "Were you going to leave?" he asks.

    Aziraphale stays quiet in the back of the room, now completely cornered.

    "Were you?" he repeats losing his temper.

    "I was" he answers nervous about what would come.

    "Why didn't you?!" Crowley screams at him.

    "I don't know" Aziraphale screams back closing his eyes not to see.

    Crowley could sense his fear returning, but it did not feel right. He didn't understand how Aziraphale could change his mind so quickly. Crowley looks at him completely drenched and quivering.

    "I'm sorry I left the house" he says "I don't know why I did what I did. I just want to go home".

    Crowley growls and takes a few deep breaths before talking.

    "What were you doing outside?" he asks again, this time trying not to sound too angry.

    "It is freezing out there, and I know snakes don't deal well with cold" he stutters "Cold blood I believe has to do with it, but you'd know better than me. I'm sure you knew what you were doing but something didn't feel right. I didn't-" he stops not knowing if he should finish.

    Crowley waits for the rest of the sentence.

    "I didn't want you to be sick" he continues a few seconds later.

    Crowley listened to him, not understanding why he would bother about his well-being.

    "If you suspected I wasn't okay, you should have made a run for it" he mutters.

    Aziraphale stays quiet and some tears stream down his face. He closes his eyes in an attempt to hold them back. Crowley notices it and gets a bit closer. Aziraphale was not crying out of fear, at least that wasn't the main reason. He could be free. He could have run away and no one would have been able to stop him. No one except himself. Before that moment, he blamed Crowley for keeping him there. Now he doesn't anymore. Crowley leaves him in his room. Aziraphale slides to the floor sitting under the window, astounded with the realization that it is his fault.

    After what felt like seconds and hours at the same time, he snaps out of his thoughts and sees Crowley at the door.

    "Get off the floor" he requests.

    Aziraphale looks at him frozen in place.

    "Listen, I might not get sick because of the cold and rain but you will if you stay like that. And I don't particularly want to deal with that so get some dry clothes out of your bag. I drew you a warm bath so don't stay there waiting until the water is cold" Crowley says almost annoyed that he did it "After you're done, you can come sit by the fireplace. I'll start a fire so it should help you to stay warm".

    Aziraphale did not expect that. He sees Crowley heading to the living room and, after a few seconds, he carefully gets up. His brain didn't fully process that interaction but he still followed Crowley's instructions. He grabs a change of clothes and walks to the bathroom. He touches the water with one of his hands. It was warm like Crowley said but it felt hotter when touching his freezing hands. Aziraphale takes off his damped clothes and feels their weight leaving his shoulders. He submerges in the water and takes a deep breath. He closes his eyes leaning back his head and hears his heart beating.

    "I can't believe I stayed because of him" he thinks "I don't think he's just mad because I left the house. I think he's mad because I'm an idiot".

    Aziraphale feels tears filling his eyes again and quickly splashes some water on his face. He breathes slowly, trying to focus on the calming sound of the rain.

    Crowley curled himself on the couch after starting the fire. Getting cold is not his favorite experience, so being close to the fireplace felt nice. He looks at it quietly thinking. He tries to understand why Aziraphale didn't leave if that was his plan, but he cannot wrap his mind around it. The way he acts is foreign to Crowley. Even if somewhere in his mind he still knows empathy, he doesn't see it often enough to remember what it feels like. Does Aziraphale care about him? Crowley isn't sure, it seemed unlikely. But if he knows something about Aziraphale is that he's unpredictable. He stays on the couch annoyed, grumbling some nonsense. Some time passes, and neither of them knows how much, but Crowley hears steps down the hallway. He lifts his head and sees Aziraphale. They lock eyes for a second but Aziraphale looks away as he walks to the couch. He sits quietly feeling the warmth of the fireplace.

    "Are you... feeling okay?" Crowley asks.

    He didn't get an answer, but that was an answer on its own. He keeps his eyes on Aziraphale, pondering on what to do. Seeing him sad was bothering him. He rests his head again looking at the fire and they stay in silence for a few minutes.

    "I didn't mean to scream at you" Crowley says.

    "I'm sure you did" Aziraphale responds "I think I would have screamed at me too".

    "Why is that?".

    Aziraphale gets quiet again.

    "Why did you get mad at me for not running away?" he asks a bit hesitant.

    Crowley thinks about the question and then sighs.

    "I don't understand why you didn't. You could have done it multiple times, but you just stay here and I don't know why".

    "What do you mean you don't know why I'm here? You're keeping me here" Aziraphale says with some anger trembling his voice.

    Crowley looks at him. He could sense his fear, but he didn't look afraid. He didn't look angry either. His expression showed an overwhelming disappointment.

    "We both know that's not why you're still here".

    He was right, he didn't stay because of rules or even because of fear. Aziraphale stayed to help Crowley.

    "Let me tell you something. I won't keep you here anymore" he states "I won't try to stop you if you leave the house. You're free to go".

    Aziraphale looks at him with his eyes wide open.

    "Are you telling the truth?" he asks.

    "I guess I could be lying" Crowley informs "You can think about it while I make you lunch".

    Aziraphale's eyes follow Crowley as he moves to the kitchen. It was too good to be true, Aziraphale was certain of that, but he also hoped that Crowley wasn't lying. He looks at the fire while taking a few deep breaths until he smells something nice coming from the kitchen.

Author's note

    Here's chapter 7 of "The Serpent's carnations"! I guess Aziraphale will have to wait and see now. Do you think Crowley's lying? Or do you think it's a Bildad the Shuhite situation? I hope you're enjoying the story! And I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 8

    Crowley is preparing lunch for Aziraphale when he hears someone approaching. He glances at the kitchen's entrance and sees Aziraphale.

    "Are you hungry? It won't take too long" Crowley says continuing to cook.

    "Where do you want me to eat?" Aziraphale asks.

    Crowley stops what he's doing for a second and turns to Aziraphale.

    "I think it would be best if you stayed close to the fireplace for a little while longer".

    "I don't feel cold anymore" Aziraphale gently states "Can I go back to my room? Maybe after lunch".

    "I don't see why not".

    Aziraphale nods and waits patiently for the food to be done. Crowley notices Aziraphale's presence still there and gets a bit nervous. He's not used to having people look at him for no reason.

    "You don't need to be standing there" Crowley says annoyed "You can at least sit down".

    "You know you can be quite frightening Crowley" Aziraphale says ignoring what he had told him.

    "Who knew a giant snake would be scary?" he mocks his statement.

    "I don't think that's the scary part. Typically snakes are only dangerous if they feel threatened and can't escape. Or if they're hungry of course…".

    Aziraphale starts to ramble but Crowley interrupts him.

    "What's the scary part then?".

    "I guess you're intimidating because you scream when you're angry and you sneak up when you're not expected. But I realize now that you're just as scary as any person can be".

    "Do not compare me to you lot" Crowley hisses at Aziraphale looking at him over his unexisting shoulder "You people do those things for two reasons: fun and control. I do not".

    "Why do you do it then?" Aziraphale cautiously asks.

    Crowley's eyes squint at him and he turns away growling.

    "Just go wait on the couch, I'll bring you lunch in a second" Crowley mutters between his teeth.

    Aziraphale returns to the living room still numb from that morning's events. He gets lost in his thoughts, coming back to reality only after seeing Crowley with his food. He thanks him and grabs the plate. Crowley moves around the coffee table and gets comfortable in front of the fireplace. Aziraphale eats in silence, occasionally looking at him. It looked almost like he was sleeping but his eyes were open looking at the flames. The heat felt good on his scales. He didn't set the fire for himself but he was still going to enjoy it.

    After lunch, he hears Aziraphale get up. Crowley looks at him walking from underneath the table. He went to the kitchen, washed his plate, and returned to his room without a word. Crowley heard the door slowly closing and then the house was almost silent, the only sounds were the crackling of the fireplace and the rain.

    In his room, Aziraphale faces the ceiling while lying in bed. He covers his face with his hands and takes a deep breath.

    "I won't try to stop you if you leave the house. You're free to go".

    He repeats that statement over and over again in his mind, trying his best to dissect it to find the truth. He didn't know if he could believe it, Crowley admitted to the possibility of it being a lie after all. He was conflicted, and the fact that he could not run away that morning only made things worse.

    After a quiet existential crisis, Aziraphale started to analyze what he had done so far. Leaving now would be impossible, he's unsure if Crowley's just mocking him. He does not trust him. And leaving that morning turned out to be surprisingly challenging. Those books gave him more questions than answers. The mysterious notes made his curiosity spike and his concern for Crowley grow. He was willing to let go of the mystery, but leaving someone in a possibly dangerous situation didn't sit well in his conscience. There was a simple solution for both uncertainties. It was quite simple in theory, but to put that idea into practice required a lot of thinking. Aziraphale realized that he could feel more at ease if he knew more about Crowley. Knowledge has always been a comfort for him, that's what he needs. But the books had nothing more to offer when it comes to answers. If he wants to learn more he'll have to do it directly from Crowley, no shortcuts. Maybe then he'll be able to leave that house.

    "I just need to talk to him" he thinks, knowing perfectly well that Crowley does not like to answer his questions.

    It's a matter of knowing how to ask and when to ask. If Aziraphale can find the right words at the right time it shouldn't be hard.

    "I'm great with words" he states trying to feel more optimistic "I've read plenty of them! Of course, most book characters aren't that great at communicating… But I'm sure it'll be fine".

    Back in the living room, Crowley was close to taking a nap. But Aziraphale's comment kept popping up in his mind. The last time someone compared him to a person was decades ago. He did not like it then, and he still doesn't to this day. The reason for that may have changed but it has always infuriated him. He takes a deep breath and looks at the fire once more. He thinks of what Aziraphale told him before that last statement. Crowley scared him when he screamed or when he creeps up on him.

    "That's fair" he thinks.

    Those are valid reasons to be afraid. But could it mean that Aziraphale's fear would fade if he stopped doing that? That sudden thought gave Crowley an idea. It would be easy to know, he just needs to try and be nice. Maybe nice is an overstatement, polite might be a better word.

    "I bet it will make no difference" he mumbles.

    He still remembers the look on Aziraphale's face when he first saw him. He is scared of him because of who he is and Crowley knows that. There's no need to test what he knows for certain, but he’s bored enough to try. At least he thinks that's the reason behind his decision, boredom and curiosity, but that was not the case. He would never admit to it, but underneath all the scales a long-lost feeling was returning. It was still small enough to go unnoticed, but it could be dangerous to let it grow. Once it settles there's not much he can do besides wait for the worst. There aren't many things that scare Crowley but this is certainly one of them. Hope. It can be both a reason for peace and devastation. It's indeed a powerful thing. Crowley watches the fire fade away for a few hours. Before it burns out he adds some more wood to help it stay alive. He sighs and lays comfortably in front of the fireplace again.

    Aziraphale hears a knock on the door. The night had settled already, but he could still hear the rain outside his window.

    "I made dinner" Crowley says after being told to come in.

    "Thank you" Aziraphale smiles but soon gets a little bit confused "Where is it?".

    "I thought you could eat at the dining room table".

    They stare at each other for a few seconds.

    "Are you trying to trick me?" Aziraphale asks suspecting something's up.

    "I'm not. It just seems more appropriate for you to eat at a table. But you can eat here if you'd like".

    "No" he says getting up "I'd like that actually".

    He follows Crowley to the dining room and sees a plate waiting for him on the table. He stops for a second and Crowley looks back at him.

    "Everything alright?".

    "Yeah, I just imagined you'd be eating with me".

    "Sorry, already ate this week. You know, snake stuff and all that".

    "I understand" Aziraphale says showing him a short smile.

    He sits at the table a bit disappointed, he was expecting a chance to talk with Crowley.

    "I can sit with you at the table if you'd like" Crowley suggests after seeing Aziraphale change his expression.

    "That... Would be nice" he responds surprised.

    Crowley slithers up a chair and looks at Aziraphale who was already looking back at him. He smiles and looks at his food ready to enjoy his dinner. Crowley quietly watches him eat but after a few bites, Aziraphale interrupts the silence.

    "I remembered something" he says.

    "What?".

    "You still don't know my name".

    Crowley lifts his head a bit and squints at him.

    "Are you not going to tell me?".

    "If you ask I will" Aziraphale responds.

    Crowley didn’t want to know his name, he wanted Aziraphale to be just another "person", "man" or "he" in his mind. Knowing his name would feel wrong. Crowley had heard that giving a name to a stray dog makes it a pet. The comparison isn't strong but it gets one thing right. Knowing someone's name means they're not a stranger.

    "I don't need to know your name" Crowley states trying his best to not be rude.

    "That's alright. But if you don't want to ask me anything could I ask you something?".

    "You can ask".

    Aziraphale had drafted some questions during that afternoon, he was ready.

    "I wanted to ask you about your garden".

    Crowley is surprised and gets curious about what he'd like to know.

    "I haven't seen it all but it is truly remarkable. And the plants around the house look luscious as well. Do you have any tips for taking care of them?".

    "It's important to plant them in good soil. And pick good seeds too. Water them when they need to and make sure they know the consequences of their actions. If you do that right your plants will look good".

    "I'll try it, thank you. I may have a new flower pot when I return home so I want to make sure I do a good job".

    "I'm sure you will".

    "Does that work with trees too? You have some pretty big ones, they look like they've been growing for years".

    "It works the same, but trees are more sturdy. They're a bit stubborn but usually behave well".

    Aziraphale smiles, he already knew that Crowley takes good care of the garden, but hearing him talk about it is something else.

    "Did you plant them all?".

    "I did".

    "Do you have a favorite?".

    "Not really, I like them all the same".

    "I'm sure there might be some with a special place in your heart if you've been doing this for years. How long ago did you start?".

    "I don't know, I think it's been over twenty years. There was one time when one of my roses flowered almost all winter, that was really impressive".

    Aziraphale listens to Crowley's stories, he did not expect to get him to talk that much but it was lovely to hear him speak like that. After he finishes retelling some of his garden's best moments, he stops talking a bit embarrassed.

    "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to tell you all that".

    "It's okay Crowley, I like to hear it".

    He sees Aziraphale smiling and his heart starts to beat a little faster.

    "You do?".

    Aziraphale notices Crowley looking at him with a soft but somewhat sad glow in his eyes.

    "I do" he answers.

    Crowley could feel it, Aziraphale was telling the truth.

    "Enough about me" he says in an attempt to change the conversation "Have you decided on what you'll do?".

    "You're talking about me being 'free to go'?".

    Crowley nods and looks curious at Aziraphale.

    "I'm still debating if I believe you or not. Until I decide I think it's too risky to run away. I'm afraid I'll be staying for some more time".

    Crowley looks at Aziraphale in silence for a few seconds.

    "If you're going to stay here, you don't need to be in your room all day. You can be anywhere in the house, besides my room that is".

    "Thank you".

    Aziraphale smiles softly at Crowley and takes another bite.

    "Have you read any of the books you borrowed?".

    Aziraphale's eyes open wide and he almost chokes on his food. Crowley looks at him concerned while he composes himself.

    "I haven't read any of them completely" he says agitated "They aren't stories so it's harder to read through them. But they're good, jolly good!".

    His reaction took Crowley by surprise.

    "If you don't like the books you don't have to read them. You know that right?".

    "Yes, I know. But I like them, just takes me more time to read".

    Aziraphale's heart was racing, he needed to change the subject.

    "The book you brought with you" Crowley asks while he's still thinking "What was it about?".

    "Oh, it's a lovely story about pirates. There's action, romance, some comedy as well. I can lend it to you if you'd like to read it. I think you might like it".

    "There's no need, probably wouldn't read it. But it does sound fun, I'll give you that".

    "What if I read you the book?".

    They both stay quiet for a moment looking at each other's eyes. Aziraphale could feel his face turning red as soon as he realized what he had proposed.

    "I'm sorry" he says stumbling upon his words "I think I got carried away".

    Crowley's face wasn't red but his heart was racing. He could not speak, which only made Aziraphale dig himself even deeper.

    "Just forget that I said anything, it was a silly idea. You don't want to read the book so why would you want me to do it for you? It was foolish of me to even ask".

    Crowley tries to think clearly, completely ignoring Aziraphale's ramble.

    "I think I would like that" he says making the room quiet.

    They lock eyes again.

    "You would? Oh, are you saying that just to be nice? You don't have to, really-".

    "I'm not nice" he says seriously for a second but after a deep breath he continues "But I think I'd like to try it".

    He looks at Aziraphale’s flustered face and tries to maintain his voice call.

    "I can go grab the book after dinner. Rainy nights tend to be good for reading".

    "Do I need to get something too?".

    "Not really, but you can get a blanket if you'd like".

    Crowley leaves the table and goes to his room for a moment. Aziraphale takes a deep breath and takes another bite of his food. He sees Crowley returning with a blanket and he goes to the couch. As he eats he sees Crowley adjusting the fireplace and the pillows. He turns to his almost empty plate and feels his face getting warmer. He didn't know why he suggested that, he was not thinking straight.

    "Just calm down" he thinks "This can be a good thing".

    Crowley seems to be acting differently that night, but Aziraphale is not sure why. He did get to talk with Crowley for a while, and reading the book can be a good conversation starter. He wipes his mouth with a napkin and gets up from the table. Crowley watches him walk to the kitchen and then to his room. He laid his blanket on the armchair and got comfortable on top. He could have easily rejected Aziraphale's proposal but he didn't see any harm in trying. Having someone read to him felt odd, he didn't particularly like that idea. And when he doesn't like something, Crowley tends to act accordingly. But at that moment he took a deep relaxing breath and waited patiently for Aziraphale. He returns after a few minutes with a book.

    The book was simple, it had a pirate flag on the cover under the title. He sits on the couch, his heart still racing.

    "Does the book have images?" Crowley asks.

    "I'm afraid not".

    "Alright" Crowley sighs resting his head on his body.

    Aziraphale tries to avoid eye contact and opens the first page of the book. He starts reading out loud and Crowley listens. In the beginning, Aziraphale was nervous but with every sentence he got more confident. He enjoyed the story, so he tried to focus on that. Crowley was skeptical at first but started to get intrigued by the characters and the plot. He looked at the book and Aziraphale, who would occasionally glance at him. As he read he noticed Crowley's eyes changing slowly. Halfway through the first chapter, his pupils were completely dilated. Aziraphale tries to ignore it but the truth is Crowley's eyes were calling for his. Having his eyes like that was not a conscious decision, Crowley didn't notice what he was doing. He was completely invested in the story, to the point of not immediately noticing Aziraphale's fear getting weaker.

Author's note

    Here's chapter 8 of "The Serpent's carnations"! It seems like their plans align perfectly, what do you think might happen? Do you think it will go well or blow up in their faces? I hope you're enjoying the story! And I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 9

    In a few minutes, Aziraphale had finished the first chapter. He stops and looks at Crowley who was waiting for more.

    "Is that the full story?" he asks confused.

    "Oh no, it's just the first chapter" Aziraphale says "Just wanted to ask if you're liking the story".

    "It's not bad".

    Crowley's answer was an understatement, Aziraphale knew that. He turns his head to the side and Aziraphale sees his eyes returning to their usual state. For some reason that made his heart ache a little, Crowley looked fascinated before.

    "Well, it's not that late yet, I think there's time for another chapter if you'd like".

    Aziraphale looks at Crowley hoping he agrees. He thinks for a bit and then looks at Aziraphale from the corner of his eyes.

    "How does it end?" he asks.

    "I'm not going to spoil the ending of the story" Aziraphale answers startled.

    "Why not?".

    "It defeats the whole point of reading the book. These pages are here for a reason, and they won't be skipped. Now, do you want me to read the next chapter?".

    Crowley scoffs and rolls his eyes before turning his head back at Aziraphale and nods positively. Aziraphale flips the page and returns to his reading. He continues to take occasional looks at Crowley, anxiously waiting to see his yellow eyes shining like they did just a short moment ago. They eventually do, making Aziraphale's cheeks warm again. This time Crowley noticed something. Aziraphale sees Crowley's eyes suddenly turn sharp. He was about to start a new sentence but stopped at that exact moment.

    "Is everything alright?" he asks but Crowley could only hear a muffled sound.

    Aziraphale found it strange, nothing like that had ever happened. He stayed quiet waiting for Crowley to do something and a few seconds later he saw his eyes getting relaxed. He notices Aziraphale staring at him and lets out a confused "What?".

    "You went quiet for a moment" Aziraphale says with some concern in his voice.

    "What do you mean? I wasn't talking, I've been quiet".

    "Well, yes… I suppose that's true".

    Crowley's eyes were looking at nowhere as he tried to process the storm of thoughts and emotions that had formed inside his head. Aziraphale could see that something was wrong but he wasn't sure what it was. Maybe something in the book made him distressed, there are some violent scenes. They are lightly described but it could still cause an impact.

    "Do you want a glass of water? Or would you prefer a cup of tea?".

    "Water is fine" he answers without giving it a thought.

    He could hear his own heart beating as he tried to slow down his mind. He knew this could happen, that's why he was testing Aziraphale's fear, but he didn't expect changes this quickly. He could sense Aziraphale's anger and fear. The first was barely significant, and the latter was slowly walking in the same direction. But he could now recognize something else. It was small and Crowley sensed its fragility. He organized his ideas, trying to pinpoint exactly what it was, but there wasn't a manual for him to follow.

    "Here you go" he hears and sees Aziraphale sitting close to him with a glass of water raised in his direction.

    It clicked for him. It was concern. Not the anxious apprehension type of concern though, Crowley could recognize that in a split second. Aziraphale was worried about him. Not about what he could do, but about his well-being. It wasn’t much but it was enough for Crowley's hope to leach onto. He did not want to feel that again. His heart was racing instead of calming down.

    "Here, drink some water, it'll help you calm down".

    He wraps his tail around the glass and takes a few sips. Aziraphale was confused but he couldn't help but feel fascinated by the sight of Crowley drinking. He had never seen a snake drink before, but he managed to keep his emotions away from his face. He puts down the half-empty glass on the coffee table and looks back at the fireplace.

    "We don't have to keep reading if it makes you feel bad. I know the story can be a lot at some parts".

    Crowley closes his eyes and listens to the sound of the rain and fire. Aziraphale hears him whisper "What if I want to know what happens next?".

    "That's simple" Aziraphale answers smiling "We just keep on reading".

    Crowley looks at him and waits. Aziraphale understood and continued reading the last pages of that chapter. It didn't take long for them to finish. Crowley focused on the story, trying to ignore all the "ifs" and "buts" and just enjoy what was being read. Aziraphale closes the book and looks at Crowley waiting for something.

    "Why are you looking at me like that?" he asks.

    "Just wondering if you liked this chapter as well. And if you're feeling better now".

    Crowley stretches and says "Yeah, I'm just tired".

    "Maybe you should get some rest".

    "I don't want to go to bed" he says annoyed.

    "Well, it's getting late so I'm going to my room" Aziraphale says getting up from the couch.

    "You sound like an old man" Crowley mocks him.

    "And you Crowley, sound like a child. So if you'll excuse me".

    Crowley looks at Aziraphale almost insulted by his insinuation. He stays at his spot and looks back at the flames. His mind wasn't quiet but it got a little more peaceful. He tried his best not to think too much about it. Aziraphale is probably just a very worried person, at least that's what Crowley said to himself. But he was also slightly upset. For someone who worries so much, he should be more careful about his own safety. Once again, Aziraphale surprises, confuses, and unsetles his thoughts. Even if that didn't make Crowley happy he was starting to get used to the unpredictability. He does not know what will happen next, and it scares him that he has no way of knowing, but he knows that Aziraphale means no harm and maybe that's all he needs to know.

    Later that night Aziraphale left his room to get his usual tea. He decided to enjoy his drink by the fireplace as there was still a small fire flickering there. As he's leaving the kitchen with a warm mug in his hands, he's taken by surprise by Crowley. He hadn't left his room to sneak on Aziraphale, he was in fact still in the same place as before. He had fallen asleep in the chair, even if it didn't look too comfortable. Aziraphale thought about waking him up so that he would go sleep in his bed, it would surely be more comfortable. But the fireplace was still lightly burning making the room warm and cozy. He lets out a smile seeing Crowley breathe deeply and quietly returns to his room with his tea.

    He slept all night after that and woke up with the sun shining through the clouds. The rain stopped while he was sleeping. He leaves his room after getting dressed and tries to spot Crowley. To his surprise, Crowley was still sleeping peacefully. He smiles and goes to the kitchen happy to make some breakfast. It's been a while since he made something to eat and he missed it. He wasn't cooking a complex meal or baking a big fancy cake, but it was enough to keep him immersed. The house started to fill with the smell of food. It reached Crowley's nose first, and as he fell out of sleep it reached his tongue too. He opens his eyes and hears clinking noises and someone humming a song. He slithers to the floor still drowsy. His back was hurting from sleeping there, and the back part of a snake is everything so he wasn't super pleased with his decision to stay in that chair. He approaches the source of the sounds and smells and sees Aziraphale in the kitchen making something, walking from one side to the other.

    "Morning" he says startling him for a split second.

    "Oh, good morning Crowley" he answers smiling "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you".

    "It's alright, I think I slept more than enough. What are you making?" he says getting closer and looking above the counter.

    "I'm just making breakfast, do you want some?".

    "I'm good, thank you".

    He looks out the window and sees the clouds being trespassed by the sunlight.

    "I'm going to the garden a little bit".

    Crowley leaves and Aziraphale eats his breakfast soon after. He then faces the empty house. There wasn't much for him to do so he decided to go look at the living room shelves. There were some plants as expected but also some fun rocks and bottles of different sizes. Some were empty and some had things inside, nothing he could recognize just by looking. He was curious about what could be inside the cabinets but he decided against opening them. He roams around the house trying to find something to do. Eventually, he decides to prepare lunch.

    Crowley comes in after some hours checking if his plants had resisted the storm. They had, he didn't expect less from them. When he opens the door he smells food again.

    "Is that you Crowley?" he hears coming from the kitchen seconds before Aziraphale pops up at the entrance.

    "Of course it's me. You think I let everyone in my house just like that?".

    "Well, you did let me walk into your house when I got here".

    "And look where that got me".

    "You are being grumpy again" Aziraphale states "Are you hungry?".

    "I'm not".

    He lounges on the couch and sighs. He was starting to get a little hungry, but he prefers to eat at night anyway. He lifted his head a while later to look at Aziraphale eating at the table.

    "Do you want some?" he asks when noticing Crowley's tongue smelling his food.

    "I don't think I can eat that".

    "Is it because you're a snake?".

    "Yeah, carnivores don't tend to eat potatoes".

    "I don't have just potatoes on my plate. You can take a look, see if you'd like anything".

    Crowley contemplates the offer for a few seconds while Aziraphale calmly enjoys his well-prepared lunch. He gets closer and Aziraphale gives him time to see.

    "Can I have a little bit of that?".

    "Of course" Aziraphale smiles.

    He cut a small piece and gave it to Crowley who thanked him and returned to the couch. Without even noticing, they created a new routine. Aziraphale took care of breakfast and lunch while Crowley spent his mornings in the garden as the weather allowed him. He would always take a small piece of food from Aziraphale's plate at lunch, but wouldn't stay with him at the table. That was reserved for dinner, which he always cooked. They spent more time talking with each other. Crowley learned that Aziraphale loves classical music and he learned that Crowley keeps all of his previous teeth in a drawer in his bedroom. He didn't fill Crowley with questions and didn't try to pull answers out of him, but he slowly got to know him better. Crowley was still acting very carefully, he could not let his guard down, but he liked to end the day listening to Aziraphale read the pirate story by the fireplace. He wouldn't admit to it, and if he could stop liking these moments he would. But it was too late for that. The next best thing is to enjoy it while it lasts. He didn't sleep on the armchair again at least, that mistake he wasn't going to repeat.

    After 3 days of calm weather, a storm formed. Aziraphale is not afraid of thunder, but he does have trouble sleeping with such loud noises. He leaves his room to get his usual cut of tea but trips on something when passing by the couch. He manages not to fall but hears a familiar angry voice behind him. He looks back and gets close to the floor. Crowley was under the couch, barely visible but partially out of his hiding spot.

    "Is that you under there Crowley? I'm sorry, I think I stepped on you, are you feeling well?".

    Crowley looks at him, his yellow eyes almost shining in the darkness of the night.

    "You have to watch your step" he says angrily.

    "What are you doing here? Did you lose something under there?".

    A lightning flashes them through the curtains and he sees Crowley closing his eyes.

    "Are you afraid of the thunderstorm?" Aziraphale gently asks.

    "I'm not" he answers "I just don't like it".

    Aziraphale takes a sit by the couch and thinks for a few seconds.

    "Why don't you like it?".

    "What's there to like?! It makes loud noises and flashing lights. It makes the air feel different, I can feel the energy running everywhere. It is not fun".

    Aziraphale remembers a note, "Day 1309 - complains that storms feel heavier".

    "I know I can't stop the storm, but is there something I can do to help?".

    Crowley stays silent for a while. He could feel that Aziraphale was worried, he didn't need that at the moment. But along with the storm, stressing about that too wouldn't help. He would most likely continue to worry if he sent him away.

    "I don't think there's anything you can do to help".

    "I was going to make some tea, would you like a cup as well?".

    "It can't hurt".

    Aziraphale gets his head close to the floor and looks at Crowley.

    "I'll be right back".

    Crowley sees him get up and walk towards the kitchen. A few more lightnings illuminate the night sky. He shuts his eyes and looks away from the windows. He would have goosebumps if he wasn't covered in scales. He hears steps after a few minutes.

    "It's still hot, so be careful" Aziraphale says after putting down a cup of tea on the floor close to the couch.

    "Thank you" Crowley says looking at the cup of tea.

    He could see Aziraphale sitting on the floor leaning his back on the couch.

    "Did you know we can count the time between lighting and thunder to see if the storm is leaving?".

    "I know" Crowley answers directly.

    "Would it help if we did that?".

    "Not really. Just let me be, it'll still pass eventually".

    Aziraphale looks out the window. The storm was still far away but it seemed to be getting closer.

    "Why are you hiding under the couch?" he asks counting with his fingers the time it took to hear the thunder.

    "It's the best place in the house. It's far from windows. It is hidden. And it's close to the floor".

    "Do you feel safe under there?".

    "Safer".

    "Aren't you cold? I noticed you didn't bring your blanket".

    "Not colder than usual".

    He takes a sip of his tea and counts the time again. It was getting closer.

    "You can go to your room" Crowley says.

    "It's alright. I haven't finished my tea yet".

    They both stay quiet for a while but Aziraphale sees Crowley pulling his cup of tea under the couch.

    "Do you have space to drink under there? You're going to spill it".

    "It's fine, I have plenty of space under here" he hisses "I wanna see if your 'calming tea' works".

    "Just be careful" Aziraphale says looking quietly out the window.

    After a few seconds, he felt the couch being hit from underneath and slightly moved to the side. He hears Crowley complaining and immediately gets close to the floor to look at him. He sees some of the tea splashed out of the cup and Crowley looking at it angrily.

    "Why is this still fucking boiling?!".

    "Oh Crowley, did you burn yourself? Come here, let me take a look".

    "I'm not leaving this couch".

    Aziraphale reaches for the tea cup and pulls it away from Crowley.

    "Fine, but you won't keep this under there, at least not until it's colder".

    He hears him grumble under the couch and takes another sip of his tea.

    "Your tea doesn't work".

    "Maybe it doesn't work with cranky snakes".

    He hears Crowley muttering something incomprehensible, most likely complaining, but he stops after another lighting and thunder who are noticeably closer now than they were before. Aziraphale looks at the half-empty cup of tea and sighs.

    "Did you hit your head before?".

    "What do you think?" Crowley asks.

    "Is it hurting?".

    He stays silent and Aziraphale gets closer to the floor again.

    "Do you mind if I see where it hurts?".

    Crowley looks at him and rolls his eyes.

    "I told you I'm not going to leave the couch".

    He hears Aziraphale moving and when he looks back he sees him lying on the floor.

    "You don't have to, just let me take a look okay?".

    Crowley stares at him for a few seconds and slowly slithers in his direction.

    "It's not going to be red or anything like that" he says "You can't see anything in the scales".

    Aziraphale stays silent and reaches his arms under the couch. Crowley looks at his hands getting closer and his eyes open wide.

    "What do you think you're doing?" he asks getting back.

    "I just want to check if you're alright".

    "You said you were going to look" he states and sees Aziraphale's hands stop in place.

    "I did, that's true" he agrees thinking of a better way to phrase his idea "I would like to check if everything is alright. I won't press too hard but you can tell me if I end up hurting you. Is that good with you?".

    Crowley's angry face couldn't completely hide his fear. He could sense Aziraphale's feelings so he knew he didn't want to hurt him, but fear isn't always rational. He slowly gets closer to Aziraphale and lays his head on the floor.

    "Go on".

Author's note

    Quick warning: there won't be any chapter next Sunday (June 30th) but the story will continue on the first Sunday of July! But here's chapter 9 of "The Serpent's carnations"! We are starting to get some cute moments of these two cuties. Do you think things will continue to go well or everything will go downhill soon? I hope you're enjoying the story! And I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 10

    It was clear to Aziraphale that Crowley was trying his best to hold it together because of the storm, but he could also see his apprehensiveness in being touched. He approached him patiently, he didn’t want to make any sudden movements. Crowley’s eyes follow Aziraphale's hands closely. He feels his fingers gently brush across the sides of his face.

    "Was it here?" he asks touching the top of his head.

    "Yeah" Crowley answers trying to keep his nerves hidden.

    He could feel his heart racing with the touch of Aziraphale's hands.

    "I don't feel any bump, so it will probably stop hurting soon" he says smiling "Did you burn yourself too?".

    "No, no I didn't. It was nothing".

    "Are you sure?".

    A light flashes outside and Crowley flinches away from Aziraphale.

    "Yes, I'm sure. Thank you".

    Aziraphale looks at Crowley, whose eyes are closed, and takes his hands slowly from under the couch. Crowley hears him moving again, hoping to hear steps and walking away. But he didn't hear much. He opens his eyes and sees that Aziraphale is still sitting there. And just like he was doing before, he takes a few more sips of his tea.

    "I think your tea is good to drink now" he says "I don't see it steaming anymore. But be careful".

    He looks to his side expecting to see Crowley pull the cup with his tail again. To his surprise, he sees Crowley's nose peeking out of his hiding spot. He stays still trying not to scare him, even his breathing stops for a few seconds.

    "Why are you still here?".

    "I haven't finished my tea yet. But there isn't much left so I'll go back to my room soon".

    Crowley stays quiet, feeling his heart beating fast. He could still feel Aziraphale's touch, like he had left a mark on his skin. It wasn't a mark that hurt and would leave a scar behind, it was warm and cozy. He doesn't know when was the last time he felt something like that. His mind was in a chaotic state, not allowing him to say much. He didn't want to have Aziraphale there, not sitting next to him, not in the house, nowhere near him. But he started to feel a weird sense of comfort when Aziraphale was close to him. He didn't know how to feel about it, and he didn't know what to do either. None of those had a correct answer, but there was a question that did. He gathers his courage and ignores the loud voices inside his head. He gives in to his curiosity wondering if he'll regret his question.

    "What's your name?".

    Aziraphale feels his face getting red.

    "Aziraphale" he answers looking at Crowley.

    "Aziraphale" he thinks.

    He didn't know that name so he would never have guessed it. But somehow it fitted him perfectly.

    "What a beautiful name" he thinks but could not bring himself to say it out loud.

    Instead, he quietly pulls his tea under the couch.

    "Is it okay now?" Aziraphale asks.

    "It is. Thank you".

    "Well… I finished my tea already so I think I'll go get some sleep".

    Aziraphale looks down not seeing Crowley anymore and a thunder echoes through the air.

    "I'll leave my door open. If you want you can hide under my bed instead of the couch. Or you can call me now that you know my name".

    "I'll be fine" Crowley says "But thank you".

    "I hope the tea helps you sleep" Aziraphale says looking at Crowley one last time "Good night Crowley".

    "Night" he answers looking at him walk away.

    Aziraphale gets in bed and feels his heart beating fast. He was not expecting to feel less sleepy now than he did before going to grab his tea. Crowley has been nicer to him lately. Aziraphale still doesn't believe that he can just leave but it feels good not to be constantly afraid. He feels safe if he stays, but that doesn't mean he wants to. He knows he needs to go back to his library, Muriel must be exhausted by doing everything alone. But now a part of him worries about Crowley too. He thought that the urge that stopped him from escaping was only a momentary feeling. It wasn't. Every time Aziraphale thinks about being back at home there's a slight bitterness to that scene. And after seeing Crowley hiding he can't help but rethink about his actions. It was the first time that Crowley showed him fear. Since he got there, Aziraphale has been cornered and threatened by him, facing him closely. But that night, he saw Crowley afraid of being touched.

    "Has he always been scared?" he questions.

    Maybe that's why he kept screaming. Because he was scared of something or someone. Crowley's words echo inside Aziraphale's mind.

    "You people do those things for two reasons: fun and control. I do not".

    Maybe that's the reason. Fear. But what is he afraid of? Aziraphale isn't sure. While thinking, a memory makes itself clear.

    "And if I can't escape you better let me go when that flower blooms. Because if you don't, you'll wish you did".

    Aziraphale turns in bed, wondering if that's part of the reason Crowley didn't want him close.

    "I didn't know I had convinced him" Aziraphale thinks "I didn't even convince myself back then".

    He's sure that isn't the only reason, or if it is one of the reasons at all, but it certainly weighs on his conscience now. He closes his eyes and holds onto his pillow. Unlike Crowley, he managed to get some sleep that night. He's used to dealing with the storms, they happen every year, but he's usually alone and no one ever comes in his house during a thunderstorm. Everyone stays at home, and so does he. But this time he has other things to worry about, other problems stacked on the problem pile. And he can't sleep until some of the problems go away.

    When Aziraphale wakes up, he still hears the rain falling against his window. He gets ready and leaves his room looking carefully at the floor to not step on Crowley again. He gets a glimpse of Crowley still under the couch. He quietly gets close and peaks at him. He thought he would see Crowley sleeping but, to his surprise, Crowley was looking straight at him.

    "Oh, sorry" Aziraphale apologizes flustered "I thought you were asleep".

    "I'm not".

    "Do you want something to eat?".

    "No, I'm alright".

    Aziraphale gets up and prepares some breakfast. Occasionally, there was lightning in the distance, the storm was almost gone but still close enough to keep Crowley hidden. It was a quiet morning, similar to the last ones but this time there was no one outside taking care of the garden. Aziraphale kept following the same routine but this time Crowley didn't join him to take a small piece of his lunch.

    "What do you usually eat Crowley?".

    "Mostly meat, sometimes eggs too".

    "Do you cook it?" Aziraphale asks unsure if he should but still curious about the response.

    "Sometimes" Crowley answers.

    They both stay silent and Crowley looks at him eating.

    "It doesn't taste the same you know".

    "What doesn't?".

    "Everything. Humans and snakes don't taste things the same way, so it doesn't taste as bad as it sounds".

    Aziraphale looks at Crowley and feels a heavy weight slowly leaning on his chest.

    "How are you so sure?" he asks trying not to sound nervous.

    "I just am".

    Aziraphale slowly turns to his plate thoroughly thinking about what Crowley just said.

    "Could he have been a human?".

    None of the notes he read in the books confirm that, but they don't deny it either. Aziraphale barely ate thinking about what could have happened. Crowley hears him leave to his room without saying another word. He paces around the bed, reading his notes again and flipping through some of the books trying to find new information. But there was nothing new for him to discover there. After spiraling into frustration for a while he hears a loud thunder. He holds his notebook close to his chest and takes a deep breath. It would be useless to keep looking at the same old books over and over again. He puts everything in its proper place and decides to draw for a few minutes to clear his mind. Not wanting to draw the same plants again, he decides to draw Crowley's eyes. They were oddly calming to think about.

    Crowley looks out the window occasionally to see the rain. The storm's pressure was still weighing on him, not allowing him to leave his shelter. He wasn't sure how long it had been but he hears steps coming from Aziraphale's room.

    "Crowley?" he asks getting closer.

    "Yes?".

    "I'm going to make dinner, I can make something for you as well if you'd like".

    "There's no need for that, but thank you".

    He zones out with the sound of Aziraphale cooking, not knowing exactly what to think about. For a moment there his mind seemed clear, but that was far from the truth. There were no loud thoughts, but after adjusting to the lack of noise he could hear whispers. They said the same things, but instead of screaming in the distance, they were whispering right beside him. It wasn't any less uncomfortable, but it was a little easier to ignore.

    Aziraphale noticed that Crowley was awfully quiet. He looks at him trying to see his face. He was still under the couch but didn't seem to be present at that moment. Maybe they didn't feel the storm the same way, but Aziraphale believed that it wouldn't last much longer, in the morning the weather should be nicer. But in the meantime, he thinks of what he can do to make Crowley feel better. He sets the table for himself when dinner's ready but grabs an extra plate.

    "Here you go" he says to Crowley giving him a plate with a few pieces of food in it.

    Crowley blinks a few times and looks at both the plate and Aziraphale.

    "I told you I'm not hungry".

    "I know but you didn't eat anything at lunch today so I thought you might like this. I wouldn't normally put a plate on the floor for you to eat, it doesn't seem very polite of me, but I don't know where else to put it".

    He stops for a second processing what happened.

    "Thank you" he eventually says.

    "You're welcome" Aziraphale answers smiling and sits at the table to eat too.

    They glance at each other over the following moments, but their eyes never meet. As usual, Aziraphale took his time to enjoy his meal, but he did make an effort to rush. Crowley looks at him getting up from the table. Were they going to read that night? He was not sure, but some moments later he starts to hear a lot of noises. There were Aziraphale's steps walking back and forth but also some furniture being moved around. He tried to see what was going on but couldn't see much from under there.

    "What are you doing?" he asks upset.

    "Don't worry Crowley, I'm not breaking anything".

    "You better hope not, you don't get to break my furniture".

    A few minutes pass and everything goes silent.

    "Crowley, can you come here please?" Aziraphale asks looking at him.

    "I told you I'm not going anywhere, not until the storm goes away".

    "I know, I know. But you see… You may want to take a look out here".

    "What did you do?" Crowley asks before looking outside.

    It took him a moment to realize what happened. There were pillows on the floor on top of a carpet, Aziraphale was sitting there comfortably. Around them there were some chairs forming a wall of some sort. And to top it all off, there were a few blankets covering everything.

    "I thought a more comfortable shelter was a good idea since the weather is making you feel uneasy. I also didn't want to see you just all crumpled under the couch anymore, I don't know if this serves the same effect but I tried to make it cozy. And I have the book here, we can read".

    He patiently waits for Crowley's reaction. After a few moments of quietly inspecting that structure, he turns to Aziraphale.

    "I still don't want to leave".

    "That's alright Crowley".

    "Can you read anyway?".

    "There's no reason not to".

    Aziraphale opens the book and starts reading where they left off.

    At first, Crowley was still on edge but he starts to slowly get pulled into the story with every paragraph. His eyes grow rounder making Aziraphale smile upon noticing. What he didn't expect to see was Crowley slowly slithering out of his hideout. He crawled on top of the pillows making space for all of his body. He kept listening to the story, which didn't stop being read, not for a second. Aziraphale's eyes shift from the words to Crowley. It wasn't a big space but there was enough room for the both of them to rest comfortably. But he sees Crowley getting closer to him, resting his head on the pillow right by his side. His heart can't avoid beating faster. His focus was running thin but he managed not to stumble on the words. After a full chapter that seemed immensely longer than the others, Aziraphale holds the book half closed in one hand.

    "Is everything ok?" Crowley asks breaking the silence.

    "It is, just wanted to know what you're thinking of the story as usual".

    "I guess it depends".

    "Depends on what exactly?" Aziraphale asks curious.

    "On the ending".

    "I told you I'm not going to tell you what happens".

    "I know, I know, I just don't want the book to end on a sad note. I'd like for the characters to be happy".

    Aziraphale notices a sad rasp in Crowley's voice and takes a few seconds to think. He truly didn't want to spoil the story, but Crowley deserved some piece of mind.

    "If they don't have a happy ending..." he says softly "Would you not want to continue reading?".

    "I would be pissed off" Crowley states somewhat angry "They don't deserve to have a miserable ending. I don't want to know if that's what happens".

    "And what if the ending is good?".

    "Then I'd like for you to keep reading".

    "Well, unfortunately for you there's only one way to find out. So what would you like to do?".

    Aziraphale waits for an answer but he doesn't get one. Instead, he gets another question.

    "If I decide I'd like to keep listening, are you going to let me finish the book?" he mutters afraid of the answer.

    "I'm not sure I understand-".

    "Cut the crap" Crowley snaps at him lifting his head "We both know you'll walk out that door one day. I want to know if I'll be able to finish the story if I decide that's what I want".

    Aziraphale is left speechless while Crowley's eyes pierce through his own. He eventually rests his head on the pillow again. He was not expecting Crowley to get so attached to the book, but it doesn't look like that's the only reason for his temper.

    "I don't personally like to abandon books half-read, so I think I can stay until it's finished. But only if you let me read you the rest of it. Otherwise I won't guarantee anything".

    Crowley stays quiet making Aziraphale more nervous. After a few long seconds, he reaches closer without turning his eyes in his direction. Aziraphale lifts his arm a little bit and Crowley settles with his head against Aziraphale's leg. Both their hearts beating nervously fast at the same pace but only one of them was afraid. Aziraphale was not sure if that was an answer from Crowley, but it appeared to be. He could see him breathe deeply next to him, making him want to rest his hand on him. He closes not to and holds his hands together fidgeting with his fingers.

    "After I leave, I can come to visit" he says after a while "Bring new books. Maybe some seeds for your garden".

    He wasn't sure why he said that, the words just carefully slipped out of him leaving his rosy cheeks completely red.

    "I don't have visits" Crowley answers.

    Why would anyone visit him after all? There's no good reason for a sane person to enter that house for a visit.

    "Well, that can change" he proposes smiling "It's not that far, I could-".

    "Why are you being stubborn about that?" Crowley asks looking at Aziraphale "I don't have visits. I don't want visits. I don't like visits. I like to stay here in my house without having anyone else bothering me".

    Their eyes meet again. Aziraphale's smile fades and he looks away from Crowley.

    "You don't mean that" he says pausing for a second "You're used to being alone, and you must have good reasons to keep people away. But I don't think you actually mean that".

    Crowley looks at Aziraphale's hands slightly trembling despite his efforts to make them stop.

    "I do have my reasons. But I guess you don't bother me that much" he says almost pushing the words out by force.

    Aziraphale looks at him not saying anything. Crowley sees his glistening eyes and has a hard time looking back at him.

    "Is it so bad that I want to be left alone?".

    "It's not. There's no reason for wasting time with people who only have ill intentions. But you deserve to find someone worthy of your time".

    They both go silent. Crowley's tired from the previous sleepless night, his mind racing faster than his heart. He lets out a yawn and tries his best to not face Aziraphale.

    "Sorry about that" he says "I know it's not-".

    "You didn't get any sleep with the storm, did you?".

    "Not really".

    "The storm is over I believe, it's just raining now, so you should get some rest".

    "I will, thank you".

    "I'm going to make some tea before heading to bed. Would you like some?".

    "I don't think it works with cranky snakes".

    Aziraphale gets flustered again.

    "I didn't mean that, I'm sure it has nothing to do with it" he tries to apologize.

    "I'm just messing with you. But no, I don't want tea".

    "Oh" Aziraphale says and smiles nervously "I'll go get my tea then, I'll be right back".

    Aziraphale leaves by lifting the blanket in between two chairs. Crowley sighs and rests his head on the pillows, waiting for Aziraphale to get back while trying to keep his eyes open.

Author's note

    And we are back with chapter 10 of "The Serpent's carnations"! I just want to skip to the good parts, but these are important too. They need time to figure things out. Do you think Crowley will get visits? I hope you're enjoying the story! And I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 11

    After a few minutes, Aziraphale returns to their hideout with a hot cup of tea. He carefully gets in without spilling it and sees Crowley with his tired eyes barely open.

    "Are you asleep?" Aziraphale whispers.

    "No, not yet. Just tired".

    "If you find this more comfortable, you can sleep here".

    "I might" he exhales.

    Aziraphale settles in place and takes a deep breath smelling the warm tea in his hands. Crowley looks at him and waits silently until he's about to take a second sip.

    "You can read the rest of the book" he says.

    What he meant was "I would like for you to stay and read that book to me" but that's not exactly how he phrased it. Aziraphale understood what he meant though.

    "I guess I'll stay for a while longer then" he responds.

    Crowley slithers in his direction and rests his head against his leg again. He didn't know what he was doing, he was too tired to listen to the array of thoughts inside his mind, but something pulled him towards Aziraphale and he was too tired to fight it too. After a few seconds, he feels something touch him. He opens his eyes and sees Aziraphale's hand slowly approaching him. He notices Crowley looking and stops, bringing his hand back.

    "Sorry, I shouldn't have done that. I got carried away and didn't-" he rambles stumbling on his words.

    "It's okay" Crowley says a little uncertain "You can do it".

    He follows his hand moving in his direction eventually resting against his scales. He felt its weight, it was nice. Aziraphale wasn't gripping or holding him in place, his touch felt safe. Crowley couldn't stop staring at his hand. He can feel his mind racing, his thoughts rushing to be heard. He could feel them creeping closer but before they truly reach him he sees Aziraphale's thumb brushing against his skin. Everything stops for an instant and the world goes silent.

    "This may be an ignorant statement" Aziraphale informs to avoid some awkwardness "But I didn't know snakes felt soft".

    Crowley's eyes shift away trying to grasp reality.

    "Is that a compliment?" he asks in a whisper.

    "If you take it as a compliment then it is".

    Crowley stays quiet for a few seconds and Aziraphale takes a few more sips of his tea. He was going to his room soon but seeing Crowley act that way was a rather blissful experience. There were no screams, grumpiness, or threats. There weren't rules at risk of being broken for the sake of safety. And even if there was no distance between the two, it didn't feel menacing to have Crowley that close. There were moments when Aziraphale could feel the fear crawling up his spine just from having Crowley look at him. Not anymore. He was terribly afraid of being touched just a night ago, and now he slithered next to him. There are only two explanations for that. He was either petrified because of the storm and actually doesn't mind being that close, or he deep down liked it. Aziraphale was not sure, but it could be a little bit of both.

    Crowley turns to him slowly and lays his head on Aziraphale's leg.

    "Have you finished your tea?".

    Aziraphale glances at his almost empty mug and gives Crowley a calm smile.

    "Not yet".

    "Just let me know when you're done and I'll move so you can go to your room".

    "Don't worry, I'll make sure to tell you".

    Crowley's eyes close after a few attempts of keeping them open and Aziraphale hears his breathing getting calmer. He keeps looking at him as if time had stopped. Crowley was not asleep, not yet at least, but he wasn't fully awake either. There were some sounds inside his mind, tired voices dragging their words to the point of incomprehensibility.

    "You aren't scared of me anymore" he thinks but it comes out as a mumble.

    In the silence of the night, Aziraphale hears Crowley's words clearly but questions if they're true. What he knows for certain is that those words weren't meant to be spoken out loud. He looks around for a few seconds. It's true. He's not scared. Crowley keeps whispering occasionally, but most of his speech isn't understandable. Aziraphale understood some isolated words but nothing good enough to make sense of. He drinks the remaining tea and looks back at Crowley, who is now completely quiet. His eyes were closed but there was something shiny rolling down from them. Aziraphale didn't know what it was at first, but once it reached his pants he quickly realized it was simply water, it was a tear.

    "Is he dreaming?" he questions "Could he be having a nightmare?".

    It was unlikely from what he had read in the books. "Day 626 - doesn't dream anymore". But there was another note saying "Day 1399 - cannot cry". That only made Aziraphale confused about the veracity of what he read.

    "It may be regarding someone else" he thinks and instinctively wipes Crowley's face.

    He moves a little and his eyes start to open.

    "Are you going to your room?" he asks.

    "I guess I am" Aziraphale answers looking at the empty teacup "But are you alright? You were crying just a second ago".

    Crowley moves his head to a pillow and sighs "Don't be silly, snakes don't cry".

    Aziraphale looks at him confused and takes a few seconds to think. He decides it would be best to go to his room and let Crowley sleep.

    "Good night" he says leaving again.

    Crowley didn't give a proper answer but he mumbled some sounds. That was good enough. In his room, Aziraphale gets ready for bed while thinking about that tear. It was strange, especially if that's something snakes can't do. He knows Crowley is not a regular snake, he can talk after all. But something felt off. Even Crowley believes that he can't cry, and he must know what he can and can't do. But he saw him shed a tear. He wanted to know more, to question him, but he looked too exhausted to have that conversation. Before getting into bed, Aziraphale looks out the window. The rain was still falling, but it seemed close to an end.

    "I think he'll get some sleep tonight" he thinks.

    They both did, it was a calm night now that the storm was finally leaving.

    The next morning, Crowley wakes up to the smell of breakfast. Once he opens his eyes he sees everything slightly cloudy. He looks around for a while getting used to his surroundings. The storm was gone at least, so he slithers to the kitchen.

    "Morning" he says after seeing Aziraphale's foggy image.

    "Good morning Crowley" he answers smiling but that smile quickly disappears when he turns around "Oh dear, are you alright? What happened? Are you sick?".

    Aziraphale sees that Crowley's eyes are pale instead of the usual shimmery yellow. His skin was also slightly lighter and duller, he didn't look like his normal self.

    "I'm not sick, it's just part of being a snake. I’m just changing my skin in a couple of weeks".

    "Oh" Aziraphale mouths realizing that it may be something natural and not a problem "You don't have to answer but... Does it hurt?".

    "No, not really, it's just stressful".

    "Is that something that helps it be less stressful?".

    "I don't think so. But don't even think of sneaking up on me now that I can't see very well".

    "I don't know, might be a good revenge from when you did that to me" Aziraphale declares with a short laugh.

    "Very funny" Crowley responds annoyed and rests on a chair laying his head on the table.

    Aziraphale grabs his breakfast and joins him at the small kitchen table.

    "I didn't even ask but did you sleep well?".

    "I did, that thing you built is cozier than it looks".

    "I'm glad you liked it. We can build it whenever you want".

    "Thank you" Crowley says, but something feels wrong "I think I'll go check on the garden now that the storm is gone".

    "Alright" Aziraphale says a bit surprised.

    Crowley leaves him to finish his breakfast alone with his thoughts. He was a little concerned about Crowley, but it's natural for snakes to shed their skin so there shouldn't be anything to worry about. After returning to his room, he grabs the snake book, this time with a different purpose. He searched the index until he found what he was looking for. There was a chapter about the shedding cycle of a snake, so Aziraphale spent a while reading it. He wanted to be informed. As he read, he quickly came upon the information that snakes shed their skin when they grow. That immediately sparked a question.

    "Is Crowley getting bigger?".

    But right after, a thought lurks in the back of his brain.

    "Was Crowley ever an actually small snake or was he just small compared to his current size?".

    Crowley's bigger than any other snake, but Aziraphale doesn't know how old he is. If he has lived long enough, he may have been a really small snake once. It was hard to imagine Crowley that way, so small he could fit in the palm of a hand. Aziraphale ignored that thought after considering it silly, but he still wondered about Crowley's age.

    A few hours later, Aziraphale hears the front door opening. Crowley slithers into the house and immediately feels warmer.

    "I'm in the kitchen" Aziraphale says to tell Crowley where he can find him.

    "Did you light up the fireplace?" he asks.

    "I did. It is a bit colder today, I thought it would be nice".

    He sees Crowley move to the front of the fire.

    "Were the plants okay?" Aziraphale asks while checking on his lunch "Did they survive the storm?".

    "They're alright, just a few broken branches".

    "And are you alright too?".

    "I am, just tired".

    "The good thing is that you have plenty of time to rest now".

    He tried his food to see if it needed more time cooking but it was perfect. After happily taking it off the heat, Aziraphale prepares to enjoy his lunch. The only thing left to decide was where to eat. He looks around but ends up going to sit on the couch. He sees Crowley's tongue in the air and he opens his eyes.

    "Do you want some?" he asks.

    "Just a little".

    He gets on the couch and moves close to Aziraphale. He carefully shares a piece of his food but sees Crowley's eyes open wide after eating.

    "Did you put something in the food?" he asks in a serious tone without looking at him.

    "Nothing out of the ordinary. Is there something wrong?".

    Crowley doesn't answer. He knew there was something different in the food but wasn't sure what it was. A few days ago he would have thought Aziraphale poisoned him, but he doubts he would do that to his own food. What could it be if not that? He had no idea, which only made him more concerned.

    "Are you alright Crowley?".

    "Mhm" he answers and slowly leaves the couch.

    Aziraphale looks at him trying to understand if he's truly doing okay. He starts to eat, glancing at him occasionally. It felt like the right decision, to give him some peace and quiet. After he's done, he puts the plate away and returns to where he was.

    "Do you like to stay close to the fire?" he asks.

    "I do. It's nice not to feel cold for a change".

    Crowley's voice sounded calm and soft but with some sadness underneath.

    "I can only imagine how it feels to have cold blood. It must be hard during this time of the year".

    "It is sometimes I guess. It's weird to describe".

    "You can try, I would like to know more. If you don't mind that is".

    Crowley glances at him sitting on the couch with his hands on his knees and with a closed smile that he couldn't see.

    "Remember when you went out in the rain?" he asks "Being in the rain is cold. But it feels colder once you're out of the rain and the wind is blowing on you. If you stay like that for some time you'll feel like falling asleep. I guess it feels similar to that, but it doesn't hurt. It makes everything slow and peaceful. I don't always like it, but there's an odd comfort in the cold sometimes".

    "It sounds... Soothing".

    "It is. But I like being warm when I can".

    He hears Aziraphale get up but, to his surprise, the steps get closer. He takes a sit by the fire as well and they both stay silent waiting to see who would speak first. Neither of them knew what to say, but the silence was a good enough sound to fill the moment. That's how they stayed, at least until Aziraphale moved to fix the fire.

    "You know what I think we should do later?".

    "What?".

    "Since we still have that little tent up, we could make a picnic for dinner while we read".

    Crowley thinks for a bit but ends up agreeing.

    "But we need to put everything back as it was tomorrow, I don't want to hit my head on the chairs during the day".

    Even without looking at him, he could hear Aziraphale smiling.

    "What do you want to do in the meantime?".

    "I don't know" Crowley sighs.

    "Well, what is it that you usually do? We can do that".

    "What do you honestly think a snake does? Go for a walk? Maybe go out to a restaurant?" he answers mockingly.

    "Do you just sleep all day then?".

    "Mostly, yes".

    "Alright then".

    Crowley feels Aziraphale move around for a few seconds but gets startled when feeling him lie next to him on the floor.

    "What do you think you're doing?".

    "I'm sleeping".

    "No, you're not" he responds baffled.

    "Don't get cranky at me, it was your idea".

    "How was it my idea?".

    "I said I would do whatever it is you spend your time doing and you said sleeping".

    "I didn't- I wasn't- You're-".

    Crowley struggles to formulate a sentence so he ends up growling and resting his head again.

    "Are you at least comfortable?" he asks annoyed.

    "Not really, should have planned this better".

    The floor wasn't the most comfortable. It wasn't cold at least but he could use a pillow. But his stubbornness is bigger than his desire to get comfortable so he stays put. He closes his eyes and hears Crowley mumble a few words. He wasn't sure why but hearing Crowley's reaction to his pettiness made him feel better. In the beginning, he wouldn't dare act like that, but now the fear has faded. Maybe that's what Crowley meant last night. He gets lost in his thoughts but a voice snaps him back to reality.

    "Lift up your head".

    "Why are you asking me-".

    "I won't repeat it" he interrupts.

    Aziraphale stops talking and his eyebrows bend inwards as he does as told. But his upset expression quickly shifts to surprise as he feels Crowley slithering underneath his head and neck.

    "Is that better?".

    "Yes, thank you" he replies flustered.

    He holds his fingers together unsure of what to do.

    "Good. Now you better at least pretend to be asleep. I don't want to spend the whole evening listening to you being stubborn".

    Aziraphale looks at Crowley who's staring at the flames and closes his eyes. He knew he wasn't going to fall asleep but now he was comfortable enough to rest for a bit.

    Later that evening, a couple of people walked into the library. It was empty so Muriel was taking their time to organize some books.

    "Hello!" they say while reaching for a higher shelf "I'll be with you in just a second if you need help, you can wait by the front desk".

    "Where is Aziraphale?" a familiar voice speaks.

    Muriel turns around and sees Michael standing there with Uriel.

    "Oh, it's you" they say smiling nervously "I wasn't expecting your visit".

    "Muriel, you know I don't like this place so just tell me where Aziraphale is and we can get this over with, it's better for everyone".

    "Mr. Fell isn't here today" they answer "But when he returns I can inform him you'd like to see him?".

    "It seems like he hasn't been here for a while" Uriel asks "It's unlikely that he would leave his dear library to your responsibility".

    "Well, he did. He even gave a letter to Gabriel recommending that I would be in charge of the library for a while. I actually think it's going great" they say happily "I'm sure he'll be glad to see what I've done once he returns".

    "Returns from where?" Michael asks.

    "He had to travel for work, we need to do that sometimes".

    "I know you do. But usually he's the one staying. And these trips don't take this long unless something happened".

    Muriel stays quiet not to say anything they shouldn't.

    "You know why you were hired, Muriel?".

    "To help run the library?".

    "Exactly" Michael says smiling "And so you know why Aziraphale needed to hire someone?".

    "Because it is easier to get the work done?".

    "Because he couldn't handle it".

    Michael stares down at Muriel who is trying not to show their nervousness.

    "What we are trying to say" Uriel adds "Is that this library cannot stay open without him here. And we are having doubts about him returning from wherever he went".

    "It was a delicate situation, so he had to replace me this time. It's taking longer than usual but he'll return. I'm sure he is doing good, so there's no need to get worried".

    "We aren't" Michael states "He's the one that should be. And if you care for this library then you should too".

    They head out of the library leaving Muriel stressed for the rest of the day.

    "I can't leave that soon" they realize after looking at their agenda "But there's an opening that could work next month. I'll have to check on him".

    They've been working hard since they got back. Gabriel didn't give them too much trouble after reading Aziraphale's letter. Muriel has been so focused on keeping the library working perfectly that they barely noticed how many days had already passed. They knew it could take a while for Aziraphale to return but they hoped Michael and Uriel wouldn't notice his absence. Muriel was already worried about his safety, but now they're even more concerned. They have to find the time to bring Aziraphale back.

Author's note

    Here's chapter 11 of "The Serpent's carnations"! We have a little glimpse of Muriel again, what do you think they'll do? I hope you're enjoying the story! And I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 12

    The sun was about to set. Crowley kept looking at the fireplace while his vision slowly got worse. He usually notices those changes but not this time. There is only one thing in his mind and it is making his heart race. He could hear Aziraphale breathing, he could feel his weight on him. But something has been wrong for a while now. Crowley can't fully understand it, but what he does know is that Aziraphale's feelings are changing constantly but slowly. It's easy to miss the changes as they happen but when looking at the bigger picture they're clearly there.

    The way Crowley perceives these feelings is by purely abstract concepts that not even he is sure how to fully interpret. It is ineffable, there's no way to describe it accurately. The closest comparison would be watercolors. Each person is a piece of paper, an empty canvas, and what they feel towards Crowley is painted there. Each color has a different meaning and they spread throughout the canvas. Sometimes they mix and overlap, other times they fade away. But those colors aren't real, they don't fit in the color spectrum, they aren't fragments of light that fit in a radiation frequency. Crowley doesn't recognize all the different hues, he's just familiar with some and therefore can identify them easily. Everything else takes time to pinpoint the meaning, they're strange to him. And a new color appears in Aziraphale's canvas. It wasn't very vibrant but it was definitely there. Crowley isn't sure of what it is but he doesn't hate it.

    The constant changes and unpredictability of the overall situation make him nervous, but there doesn't seem to be any reason to worry. Even if he still doesn't know what's happening, he at least knows Aziraphale has no intention of hurting him. He feels safe, he doesn't particularly like it and will deny it but it's the truth.

    He didn't get to sleep that afternoon, he stayed awake looking at the fire and thinking, getting occasionally distracted by Aziraphale readjusting himself. Crowley doesn't know if he fell asleep and, at this point, he couldn't take a look to see if that was the case. Aziraphale wasn't sleeping, but he did get close to it. He was in that peaceful moment when the mind starts to wander into dream-like scenarios while still being present in reality. He could feel Crowley breathing, he didn't expect to have him as a pillow but he surely wouldn't complain about it. He starts to feel hungry so after getting past the sleepiness he sits down and stretches.

    "Are you done sleeping?" Crowley asks.

    "I think so, at least for now. I'm going to prepare dinner for our picnic. I know you're probably not hungry but do you want something to eat too?".

    "No, I'm okay".

    "Next time you eat we could have dinner together" he proposes happily "Or lunch".

    "I don't know" he hesitates "I'll think about it".

    "Of course, we don't have to do it if you don't want to. Just let me know if you'd like that".

    Aziraphale gets up and heads to the kitchen. Crowley stays put for a few more minutes but after a while, he stretches and leaves his warm place close to the fire. He enters the fort and checks if everything is in place. After fixing the pillows he grabs a blanket from his room and brings it in to leave the space more cozy. He struggles a little to find the book but after accomplishing that he sets it up nicely for Aziraphale to read. After tweaking everything for some minutes, Crowley senses the smell of food in the air. He slithers slowly to the kitchen and hears Aziraphale humming a song.

    "I think everything's ready over there".

    "Lovely" Aziraphale says smiling "I won't take long here, I'm almost done".

    He decided to prepare something simple and easy to eat. There was some jam in the kitchen and a little bit of bread, and also some grapes for dessert. It isn't the best dinner he ever had, but it surely will be fun to eat while reading.

    "Do you need help with anything?" Crowley asks getting closer but accidentally bumps into Aziraphale.

    "Oh, are you alright?" he asks.

    "Yeah, sorry about that. But do you need help?".

    "Thank you Crowley, but there's no need for that. You can go ahead, I'll be there in no time".

    Crowley leaves embarrassed and gets comfortable in the pillows. It doesn't take long for Aziraphale to join him. He sits at the same spot as yesterday and puts down his plate in the chair closer to him.

    "I know you can't see very well but if you want some food just let me know".

    Crowley nods positively knowing perfectly well that he wasn't going to eat, not after what happened at lunch. That doesn't mean he didn't enjoy that moment. They read a couple more chapters of the book and Crowley gets closer to Aziraphale little by little. By the end of the first chapter, Crowley's head was resting on Aziraphale's legs, who also had one hand resting on him, only moving away when he needed to flip the page.

    "Have you read all the books in your library?" Crowley asks.

    "Not quite, we have oodles of them. But I've read most of the novels".

    "It must be nice to have all those books".

    "They aren't technically mine, but yes, it is nice".

    Aziraphale thought about suggesting to bring some of the books to Crowley but he didn't. It would be a silly suggestion, he doesn’t want visits after all. He closes the book and gently pets Crowley. Once again, both of their hearts beating faster than usual, one could almost hear them in the silence. Crowley didn't want to move, but Aziraphale's touch was like no one else's. He managed to stay still like a statue that night. After some words, Aziraphale gets ready to go to bed. Crowley stayed in the fort, it was already warm in there and he didn't feel like going to his cold mattress.

    The next morning, Aziraphale puts the chairs back in their place after Crowley goes to the garden. The day was calm, but he did find it weird that Crowley wasn't eating anything. It could be because of the skin changing but in the book there was no mention of different food habits during this stage.

    "Are you feeling alright?" he asks him when joining him on the couch after dinner.

    "I am, why do you ask?".

    "You haven't been eating anything, I can cook something for you if you'd like".

    "It's okay, I'm not hungry yet. And snakes can't eat cooked food anyway".

    "Oh. Oh no" Aziraphale says after realizing that Crowley has been eating little pieces of cooked food for all those days "Why didn't you say so? I knew something was wrong, you probably got sick from eating my food".

    He gets closer to Crowley and starts to see if he's alright.

    "Do you need to go to the doctor? To the vet? Why did you eat if you knew it would hurt you?".

    "Hey, let go of me, I'm fine, I'm not sick" Crowley says freeing himself from Aziraphale's hands.

    He takes a step back and looks at him.

    "But you said snakes can't eat that".

    "Snakes can't talk either".

    "Right" he responds embarrassed.

    "I can't eat much of it, but a little bit doesn't hurt. I just haven't been feeling hungry".

    "I understand. And I'm sorry for the way I acted".

    "It's alright, but you don't have to worry".

    "I know I don't have to, that's not how it works" Aziraphale says as he opens the book "Shall we?".

    Crowley slithers to his lap and gets comfortable. He listens to every word and immerses himself in the story completely. He had heard of books like that, fictional stories of fictional characters, but he never read any of those. He likes it. After they're done reading for the night, they head to their rooms to rest.

    A couple more days pass by, and eventually, Crowley gets hungry. He remembers Aziraphale's suggestion, but he didn't want to agree to it. He likes to keep him company while he eats but he doesn't want to be seen while doing so. Especially now, he doesn't want to scare him away. Similarly to the last few times, Crowley goes to the kitchen in the middle of the night and eats a proper meal. But this time there was something different, just like when he tried Aziraphale's lunch the other day. The taste is not normal, it is changing.

    Suddenly his pupils get slim as the realization dons on him. He knows there's nothing wrong with the food. He's the one who's changing. There it was again, that feeling that makes shivers crawl up his spine. Hope. He couldn't move for a few seconds, he just stayed there terrified while trying to keep the food inside of him.

    He felt something on his face, it was a tear. He shakes it off in denial but remembers Aziraphale saying that he was crying. Could he be? No. It is impossible, he knows it. He runs to his room and closes the door. He quickly slithers under his blanket and tries to get some sleep. After trying and trying, he successfully makes his brain quiet enough to fall asleep. But something worse was waiting for him during his sleep. A dream.

    When Aziraphale wakes up he looks for Crowley around the house. He was nowhere to be found. He looked out the windows but Crowley wasn't outside either. He finally knocks on his bedroom door.

    "Are you in there Crowley?".

    "I am" he hears from the other side of the door.

    "Good morning" Aziraphale says smiling "I hope I didn't wake you, I was just looking for you".

    "Do you need something?".

    "No, not really".

    Aziraphale stays quiet looking at the closed door.

    "Are you alright? You don’t usually stay in your room at this time".

    "Everything is fine, I just woke up feeling a little off".

    "Do you need something? Can I come in?".

    "No, don't worry, it's nothing serious. I just need to rest a little more".

    "Just tell me if you need anything then" he says a little worried.

    Crowley seemed nervous, but there was not much he could do about it. During the whole day, Aziraphale glanced at the door but it remained closed. He talked to Crowley a couple more times, asked him if he wanted some food or water or just to talk but his offers were denied every time. On the other side of that closed door, Crowley was erratically slithering around his room. He could feel Aziraphale's concern grow, which didn't help calm him down. He would stop moving occasionally, completely lost in his thoughts. His heartbeat was so fast it felt like his whole body was shaking. He didn't even notice the sun go down until Aziraphale knocked on his door again.

    "I was wondering if you'd still like to read today" he says "We don't have to, but it might help you feel better?".

    He hears no answer but after a few seconds the door handle moves. He takes a step back to give space to Crowley and the door opens a little.

    "I'm sorry" he says "I don't think I would be able to follow what you read today. It would all go flying in my mind".

    Aziraphale gets down to the floor to get to the same level as Crowley.

    "You don't need to apologize for that, it's alright. But what if instead of reading a new chapter we go back some pages and read the best parts again? Would you like that?".

    Crowley thinks quietly before giving Aziraphale an answer. It seems like a good idea, but he isn't sure if it truly is.

    "Did you light up the fireplace?" he asks.

    "Yes, it's very warm and cozy".

    "I'll be there in a couple of minutes then".

    Crowley gently closes the door and Aziraphale patiently waits on the couch. Soon after he hears the door opening again. Crowley slithers carefully until he finds Aziraphale. He then joins him and rests his head on his legs. Aziraphale asks where he would like to start but he's unsure.

    "You can pick the first one".

    Aziraphale flips through the pages until he finds what he's looking for. He reads a couple of paragraphs. Crowley wasn't paying attention in the beginning, his mind was flooded with loud seemingly unstoppable chaos. But hearing Aziraphale's voice pulls him to that moment. After he was done reading that part Crowley suggested another one. They read for a while and talk about their favorite moments. It could have been a peaceful moment, but Crowley was not doing okay. Aziraphale tried not to mention it, maybe acting normally would help him feel better. But he could hear his voice trembling every time he spoke.

    "Aziraphale?" he asks while Aziraphale looks through the pages.

    "Yes?".

    "I know you said you'd stay until we finish the book. But you could leave if you want to. I won't be able to see you go, so you don't need to be scared. It would be safe for you".

    Crowley's words take Aziraphale by surprise. He feels a heavy weight on his chest. He gets angry at him for not trusting his word but is also sad that he wants him gone as soon as possible. He takes a deep breath before talking.

    "Crowley, look at me".

    "I can't see you even if I looked".

    "Please".

    Crowley gives in to Aziraphale's request and lifts his head to look at him. He can't see much but feels his hands holding his face softly.

    "There's something wrong. I don't know what happened and you don't have to tell me, but I won't leave you like this".

    "You're really stubborn, you know that?" Crowley asks to try and lighten the moment.

    He feels Aziraphale's hands move and his arms kindly embrace him.

    "I don't want to leave you alone" he says while hugging Crowley.

    The seconds take their time to pass as Crowley is stuck in a state of shock. He holds his breath instinctively. Aziraphale had no idea how he would react but when he was going to let go he felt something. Hesitantly Crowley sets his head on Aziraphale's shoulder. One of his hands moves up and holds him gently. He hears Crowley breathing again and he wraps himself around Aziraphale. Their hug gets tighter and Crowley holds back his tears.

    "This is stupid" he says almost in a whisper.

    Aziraphale smiles and strokes Crowley's back.

    "Don't be so grumpy".

    They hold each other for a while longer until Crowley loosens his grip.

    "Are you feeling better Crowley?".

    "I'm not sure".

    "Can you tell me what's bothering you?".

    Crowley stays quiet and Aziraphale regrets asking.

    "I'm sorry, you don't have to answer".

    "It's fine".

    He lays down his head again and sighs.

    "Something happened tonight while I was sleeping, something that shouldn't have. And I'm not sure when it will happen again but I didn't like it".

    "Are you scared it will happen again tonight?".

    "I'm not scared" Crowley scoffs "Just don't want to go to sleep again".

    Aziraphale looks at him and thinks for a few seconds.

    "You know you can call me if you're scare- I mean, if you're nervous. I'll help you".

    "I don't think there's anything anyone can do to help".

    "Even if I can't do anything, I can be there for you if you want".

    Crowley shakes his head once, agreeing with Aziraphale. They stay close to the fireplace for a while longer. Aziraphale strokes Crowley's skin and feels his scales against his fingers. He lets him rest. Even if he stayed in his room all day he seemed exhausted. The fire burns out leaving them in the dark, the only light was coming from the moon outside. Aziraphale stretches his arm and reaches for a blanket. He feels Crowley moving but when he looks at him he notices that he's sleeping. He moves quietly and puts the blanket around them both. He looks at the kitchen and yawns.

    "No tea for me today".

    Getting tea was not a good reason to wake up Crowley.

    "I'll have to wake him anyway when I go to bed" Aziraphale thinks "But it's still not that late, I can stay for a few more minutes".

    And so he stays. He felt Crowley moving in his sleep a few times but he didn't seem distressed. It almost looked like he was trying to get closer to Aziraphale to get warmer. He tries his best to keep them covered but sleep starts to weigh on him. It gets harder to keep his eyes open. He didn't expect to fall asleep on the couch, he usually has a hard time falling asleep when things aren't just right. He didn't have his tea, his bed, and his clothes weren't the best for sleeping. He also wanted to stay awake to make sure that everything was okay, that Crowley was okay. But the living room was warm and the couch was comfortable. Aziraphale couldn't avoid falling asleep too.

Author's note

    Here's chapter 12 of "The Serpent's carnations"! For now, we are getting plenty of wholesome moments, let's see how long they last until drama strikes back at them. And I hope you're enjoying the story! And I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 13

    There were no dreams that night so Crowley managed to sleep well. Aziraphale also slept a few hours, but he woke up feeling slightly lost. It didn't feel like he was in his bed, but soon his memory catches up to him. He opens his eyes and sees Crowley on the couch with him. Aziraphale looks around trying not to move too much and feels his face getting warmer. Crowley was spread on the couch but also on top of him like a blanket on his legs. His head was resting on his arm while staying close to him. Aziraphale looks into the void and his mind fills with questions.

    "What time is it? When will he wake up? He was pretty tired, what if he sleeps in all morning? Should I just wake him? Would he be mad? I should let him sleep, he probably needs it. But I'm hungry, I should get food".

    He debates in silence and after some time he nudges Crowley.

    "Crowley" Aziraphale whispers but feels him lean on him and take a deep breath.

    His face gets red again as he tries to think of another way of getting out. There was none.

    "Crowley" he whispers again "Can you hear me?".

    "Hmmm" he hears as Crowley starts to wake up.

    It takes him a little longer since his vision is still foggy but as soon as he realizes there's someone next to him he gets scared and falls off the couch.

    "Shit" he says and shakes his head.

    "Are you alright?" Aziraphale asks sitting on the couch "I'm sorry, I just wanted to wake you up. I didn't mean to make you fall".

    "It's fine, I'm fine".

    They stay silent wondering if they should talk about what happened.

    "Did you sleep well this time?".

    "I guess so, I didn't-" Crowley stops for a second and then continues "It didn't happen again".

    "I'm glad to hear" Aziraphale smiles "Do you want some breakfast?".

    "No, I'm okay. I think I'll go check on the garden, I didn't do anything yesterday".

    "Alright".

    "Before I go, can I just ask you something?".

    "Sure".

    "Do you miss your library?" he asks hesitantly.

    Aziraphale gets quiet for a few seconds. Crowley doesn't know if he should have asked that, saying it out loud feels harsh.

    "I do miss it" he answers "I know I left it in good hands but I don't like to stay away for long. It's not safe".

    "Why is it not safe? Is someone after you?".

    "Oh, no, nothing of that sort. It's just that there were a few times in the past when some people tried to close that library. And I've always been there to save it. I miss everything about it. Organizing the events, smelling the new books, meeting authors. I know it will still be there waiting for me, Muriel always does a good job. But sometimes I fear it will all be gone".

    Crowley couldn't see his expression but his voice sounded full of sorrows.

    "Sorry, I shouldn't have asked. I didn't know it would make you upset".

    "Oh, it's fine. Everything is fine".

    Aziraphale tries to hide his worries but Crowley gets on the couch and wraps himself around him.

    "Is- Is this a hug?" Aziraphale asks.

    "Don't get used to it" Crowley answers.

    Aziraphale hugs him back for a few seconds until he slithers away.

    "I'll be outside if you need anything" he says leaving.

    After that hectic start of the day, everything seemed to be in order. When Crowley returns, Aziraphale is just finishing cooking his lunch.

    "I think we need to go buy more food" he says "There isn't much left".

    "I'll be good to go tomorrow, my vision will be back".

    "Are you losing his skin today?" Aziraphale asks excited.

    "No, not yet. But I'll have a few 'normal' days before that happens so I can go to the village and get us some more food".

    "Can I go along?".

    Crowley looks at him instinctively and thinks for a moment.

    "I don't know if that would be a good idea".

    "Oh" Aziraphale responds "I understand. You don't want to worry about me wandering off".

    "No, that's not it".

    "What is it then?".

    Crowley stays silent thinking and rethinking about the best way to respond.

    "I don't think you'd like to go there with me".

    "Nonsense, I think it would be rather lovely".

    "It won't, trust me. But if you really want to, you can come along. Just try to avoid trouble, ignore everything that isn't important".

    "I will, thank you" he responds very pleased with the outcome of that conversation.

    On the other hand, Crowley isn't too happy. He has a feeling Aziraphale isn't good at ignoring the things that aren't worthy of their attention. And besides that, he's nervous that Aziraphale will change the way he feels about him. Those thoughts don't leave his mind throughout the day. He doesn't know what will happen. Crowley's used to go alone, it isn't fun but it's necessary. Going with Aziraphale will be different and the possibilities spike his nerves. He's not the only one nervous, Aziraphale feels that same way but for other reasons. He's unsure of what to wear and why Crowley thinks he won't like it. That only makes him more determined to have a good time. He'll make sure everything goes smoothly. Crowley notices Aziraphale smiling throughout the day and doubts his decision to bring him along.

    "Hey, I know you're excited about tomorrow" he says at the end of the day "But don't get your hopes up. It truly isn't something to look forward to".

    Aziraphale puts down the book and looks at Crowley.

    "I'm starting to think you worry too much" he says gently.

    "And I think you don't worry nearly as much as you should" he answers slightly annoyed at Aziraphale's statement.

    "Don't worry, it will be fine".

    He hears Crowley make some noises but he doesn't say anything else. It was getting late already so Aziraphale suggested they get some rest.

    That night Crowley had another dream. They aren't nightmares but they can't be described as good either. Just nonsensical sequences of events that are only partially remembered. Even if they aren't bad, Crowley doesn't like them. The idea that he can't rest his mind even when he sleeps bothers him, especially since he'll be sleeping more as the weather gets colder. He wakes up surprised. His skin had returned to normal and he could see again. He looks around his room, the sun would probably take a little longer to rise.

    "Am I supposed to get used to this?" he asks.

    After wandering around his room for a while he slithers back underneath his blanket and sighs.

    "Just get some more sleep" he thinks "Just a few more hours".

    He closed his eyes but his heart was beating too fast for him to fall asleep. He tosses and turns for some moments, going from nervous to enraged. Why falling asleep is so hard is something Crowley can't understand. He leaves his bed again to blow off some steam but as he's thinking he remembers what Aziraphale told him.

    "Even if I can't do anything, I can be there for you if you want".

    He stops with a changed expression. After staring at the door for a few seconds, Crowley returns to his bed once more, this time feeling calmer.

    "I don't need his help" he thinks, but knowing that he could ask for it comforted him enough to sleep.

    It's the first time someone is there if he needs it. He's still unsure how to feel about it, the voices in his head constantly remind him that this is not the way it should be. But among them all there's one who tells him that it is okay and that he should take it while it lasts. Maybe he will.

    Aziraphale wakes up a little earlier than usual. He gets out of bed excited for the day and gets dressed in his favorite clothes. He leaves his bedroom still fixing his bow tie and faces Crowley.

    "Good morning" he says smiling.

    "Someone slept well" Crowley answers "Good morning".

    "Oh, it took me a while to fall asleep but after that I did sleep very well. How about you?".

    "I slept fine".

    "Did it happen again?".

    "It did but I managed".

    "I'm glad you did. But don't hesitate to call me if you need to. I'll help".

    "You helped even if you weren't there".

    Aziraphale's caught off guard and feels his face getting red. He tries to respond but he stumbles upon every word making it hard to understand. He gives up on that and heads to the kitchen to get some breakfast. Crowley follows him silently.

    "Your eyes are shiny again" he says when sitting next to Crowley at the table "Is your vision back?".

    "Yes, I can see normally now".

    It has been a while since Crowley last saw Aziraphale smile, he didn't know he missed it. A few minutes later they're ready to leave the house.

    "Before we go, don't forget what I told you. We aren't going to a park, this is serious, not fun".

    "I'll stay out of trouble, don't worry".

    "Telling me not to worry doesn't help, you know that?" Crowley points out as he closes the door of the house.

    They start following the street that leads to the town. It was a nice day. Aziraphale could hear birds chirping on the trees close by and the sun felt good on his face. He could see some houses getting closer but there weren't many people out on the streets. It seemed like a peaceful place, he's not sure why Crowley was so worried. As they get to the actual house Aziraphale notices that all the people he had seen on the streets were gone.

    "Where do you usually shop around here?" he asks.

    "Just a few streets over there".

    "It is very quiet, is it always like this?".

    "Probably not".

    A few minutes later Aziraphale spots a few stores and points to one of them.

    "I want to go there and buy some fresh fruit".

    "Go ahead, I'll be right behind you".

    He notices that Crowley's voice has grown serious, he hasn't heard him like that in a while but that's exactly how he sounded when he first got there. He enters the store and sees a young woman at the counter.

    "Good morning" he says smiling.

    "Good morning sir, do you need any help?".

    "No, thank you, we're good".

    "We...?" she whispers but soon after her body freezes in place at the sight of Crowley.

    He glances at her making her feel more intimidated. Oblivious to that exchange of looks, Aziraphale has a good time picking up different fruits. When he's finished he heads to the counter ready to pay.

    "How much is it?".

    "Oh, it's nothing, don't worry about it" she says smiling nervously.

    "That can't be right, this is quite a good amount of food. I can pay for it".

    "Sir, we don't want problems with your... acquaintance".

    Aziraphale looks back and sees Crowley at the other end of the store just looking around with nothing to do.

    "What kind of problems?" he asks confused.

    She stutters a bit but manages to say "Does he not eat people?".

    "People?" Aziraphale repeats flabbergasted "Crowley, come here for a second".

    "No, there's no need for that" she tries to say but Crowley was already slithering their way.

    He uses Aziraphale as support and crawls until he's at the same eye level as them.

    "Is there a problem?".

    "This lady is under the impression that you eat people".

    "Is that what you want me to do? I'm surprised".

    "No, of course not. I was just trying to show her that we aren't here to cause any trouble".

    "I don't think I can help you with that" Crowley says as he slithers back to the floor "I'll wait for you outside".

    Aziraphale looks at what he brought to the counter and takes some money from his pocket.

    "Is this enough?".

    "Yes, that's more than enough. Let me get your change".

    "Don't mind that, you can keep it".

    Aziraphale smiles as he picks up everything and heads out of the store. Crowley was right there waiting for him.

    "You didn't have to scare her like that" he tells him.

    "It's not my fault if she's scared of me" he states firmly.

    "Yes, I know, but you didn't have to make it worse. Poor girl may have nightmares".

    "I'm not making anything worse. And if I'm the cause of nightmares then let it be".

    Aziraphale stops to think for a second, he can see that Crowley is agitated.

    "I didn't mean that, I'm sorry. You're not nightmare fuel, I just didn't expect to see you act that way again".

    "It is the way it needs to be".

    They enter their next stop, a butcher, and Aziraphale looks around.

    "Can you help me choose? You eat this too after all".

    "I'm not picky".

    "Alright then" he says giving Crowley a short smile.

    He asks the employee what he needs and when it's time to pay he's faced with the same response.

    "He doesn't eat people" Aziraphale says calmly "If he did we wouldn't need to buy so much food. Now, how much is it?".

    The man standing there looks at Crowley not knowing what to do.

    "Just let him pay, it will be easier and faster".

    Aziraphale smiles and pays for their food. They leave soon after and stop at a couple of other places. Everyone reacted similarly and Aziraphale started to understand why Crowley warned him. He understands now that it is hard to leave the house when everyone is scared. Maybe no one ever gave him a chance to explain himself. He doesn't know how long Crowley has lived there, but it surely is enough time for his patience to run thin.

    "Crowley" he says as they start to go back home "I'm sorry, I didn't know it was like this".

    "It's fine, I just didn't want you to get your hopes up".

    After Crowley finishes talking they see a ball slowly hit a wall next to them. They instinctively look to their right and see a group of four kids and a small black and white dog. One of the kids takes a few steps closer and Aziraphale picks up the ball to hand it over.

    "Are you taking it with you?" he asks.

    "Oh, no, none of that. You can have it back".

    The kid smiles and takes a few more steps until he hears a distressed voice running in his direction.

    "Adam, come back here" they hear a young woman say as she rapidly approaches them.

    "I was just getting our ball back" he says.

    "I know, but just let it be just this once" she says getting in between Adam and Crowley.

    "It's alright, he can have it back" Aziraphale reassures.

    "You know what, just keep it, they have other games they can play. And they need to go back to class right now anyway".

    She gently nudges Adam away and follows him. The kid looks back a little confused and talks to that woman, probably asking questions.

    "Are you taking that?" Crowley asks.

    "I don't want to leave it here on the street alone" Aziraphale says looking at it "It isn't in the best shape, maybe I can fix it before returning it to them".

    "Let's just go, you can think about that later".

    He smiles thinking the day finally took a positive turn. He just needs to fix that ball, return it and everything will be fine. But as they continue their path, they see a man wobbling in their direction. He stops walking and leans against the wall of a house to light up a cigarette. When they get closer they hear him speak.

    "Nice pet you have there, you should bring him on a leash next time".

    His voice was harsh and he didn't seem to be in a completely clear state of mind.

    "Oh, he's not my-" Aziraphale tries to respond but Crowley interrupts him.

    "He's not talking to you" he says with a serious tone of voice.

    "Oh" he says a little surprised.

    That man smirks at Aziraphale who avoids looking at him. His hair is light but it would be lighter if it was clean.

    "You should stay away from him. We can't get rid of that fucking murderer but he isn't going anywhere else. So leave while you can".

    "I don't know what you're talking about" he states.

    "Maybe ask your friend there, I'm sure he's proud to tell you everything that he did. And if he doesn't, ask anyone in this town. We don't mind warning outsiders about that monster".

    Crowley stops moving and looks at him with his pupils paper thin.

    "If you don't stop talking to him you're going to regret ever opening that filthy mouth".

    Crowley stares him down for a few seconds as he feels his fear growing. Eventually, the man scoffs.

    "Do what you want, it's none of my business how people want to die. And he clearly doesn't value his life if he stays that close to you".

    Crowley leaves and Aziraphale follows him taking one last glance at that man. He was slithering fast back to his house making Aziraphale walk faster to keep up.

    "Crowley, what was that man talking about?".

    He tries to slow him down and talk to him but he doesn't listen to a single word. They get home after a few fast minutes and Aziraphale hears Crowley's bedroom door being slammed closed. He puts down the groceries and gently knocks at the door.

    "Crowley, can I come in? I think we should talk".

    "There's nothing to talk about" he grumbles from the other side of the door.

    "You're clearly upset. Just take a few deep breaths, it will help you calm down".

    "I'm very calm".

    "Crowley, let me just get in there for a few seconds, I-".

    "I don't need your help!" he shouts "Go away!".

    "I just want to know what happened, I don't know what that man was talking about".

    "Oh, is that all you care about?".

    "No, of course not. I'm here for you".

    He hears Crowley agitated and puts his hand on the door handle unsure if he should open it. He waits as the whole house goes silent.

    "Crowley, please, can we talk?" he asks softly.

    To his surprise, the door opens.

    "Do you want to know what that man was talking about?".

    "It would be nice to know what's going on, so yes".

    "Fine. I'll show you" Crowley says as he slithers out of his room "But after that, you're leaving".

    "Leaving? What about our book? I don't want to leave yet".

    "Believe me, you will".

Author's note

    Here's chapter 13 of "The Serpent's carnations"! What do you think happened to Crowley? Do you think that man's acusations are true? And who do you think that blonde man his? And I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 14

    Aziraphale follows Crowley to the living room and sees him opening a drawer. He picks up an old piece of paper and holds it out to Aziraphale. He gently grabs it and sits down before reading. His heart was beating faster every second. Crowley wasn't acting like he normally does. It was like they jumped back in time to the first days after they met. He unfolds the paper, it was a piece of a newspaper.

    "Two men killed by a giant snake".

    Aziraphale glances at Crowley before reading further. He was staring at him, his eyes almost fully yellow due to the thin shape his pupils took.

    "After years without causing trouble, the giant snake living on the outskirts of town strikes again. Two lives were lost after approaching it, the other present left the crime scene injured. The families of the deceased ask the people to leave it alone to avoid more losses".

    "Is this... True?" Aziraphale asks trembling.

    "It wasn't the first time either" Crowley states.

    Aziraphale stays silent moving his eyes around that page, desperately trying to find something that would disprove everything.

    "You should go now".

    "I don't believe this" Aziraphale whispers.

    "What?".

    "I said I don't believe this".

    He looks at Crowley refusing to let his tears fall.

    "If you didn't believe it you wouldn't be scared right now".

    "But it's missing something important. Why it happened and how it happened. If you're going to show me this article then I want it written properly".

    Aziraphale puts down the paper and holds his hands nervously.

    "I don't have other newspapers for you to read".

    "Then you're going to tell me yourself" he says with panic in his voice.

    "No".

    Aziraphale stares back at Crowley.

    "I'm not leaving until I know the full story".

    "Then feel free to stay because I'm not telling you another word".

    Crowley starts to slither back to the hallway. Nothing was going well. Aziraphale thinks of a way to stop him, to bring him back to talk to him.

    In the heat of the moment as he sees Crowley further and further away he says "You never tell me anything. Why won't you tell me anything?".

    No answer.

    "I know you weren't always a snake".

    Crowley stops.

    "You slowly became one right?".

    "How do you know that?" he grumbles without looking back at him.

    "I found notes about it in one of your books, it was about snakes" Aziraphale states feeling some regret towards his approach.

    "Where is it?".

    "It's in my bedroom".

    He sees Crowley moving fast and hears noises right after. As he's about to get up he sees Crowley rushing in and tossing the book in the fireplace. He quickly lights up a match and throws it in. Aziraphale runs and picks up the book before it catches on fire.

    "Give it to me".

    "No, you're not burning a book".

    "I said give it to me!" Crowley screams with despair-filled tears streaming down his face.

    Aziraphale looks at Crowley panting and slowly hands him the book. He tosses it back into the small fire and watches it burn.

    "Are there more of these notes?" he asks.

    "I'll get them for you" Aziraphale says with that scream still echoing inside his mind.

    He grabs the pile of books while Crowley watches as the fire consumes the old pages. Aziraphale sits down a few steps away from him and looks at the fire too. He starts handing some of the books to Crowley, only the ones that have notes written by those two people. Most of the books are burned.

    "This one's notes are from a kid" he says with the astronomy book in his hands "I was trying to figure out what happened to that child and who I assumed were his parents".

    Crowley looks at the book and Aziraphale gives it to him. He looks down expecting to hear the flames envelop another book but he hears nothing. He looks at Crowley and he's staring at it. He was filled with anger but that book unlocked something different inside his mind. He gently opens it and Aziraphale watches him flip through the pages. The fire burns out leaving only ashes in its place.

    "He never got the telescope" he whispers as he closes the book a few moments later.

    "Do you know what happened to him?".

    Crowley looks at Aziraphale and stares deep into his eyes for a few seconds.

    "I do" he says and looks back at the book "But you don't actually care, you're just curious. And I'm tired of curious people messing with my life like it's worthless".

    "I didn't-".

    "You didn't what? You didn't lie? You didn't hide this from me? You didn't stay just to find out the end of this story like it's just another one of your books? Don't bother coming up with excuses. Go back to your fancy library. Take your stupid book with you. And leave me alone".

    Crowley takes the astronomy book with him to his room and slowly closes the door.

    Aziraphale stays at the same place unable to move. He feels his conscience floating, dissociating from that moment. His vision gets cloudy and a few lonely tears roll down his face. The thoughts inside his head race one after the other. That man called Crowley a murderer. The article pointed to the same thing. Crowley himself confirmed it. But he wouldn't do something like that. That man wasn't thinking straight. The article is incomplete. Crowley's just being grumpy again.

    Aziraphale tries to hold onto those ideas but they slip through his fingers. He knows what the truth is, but it's hard to believe when it is something like this. And maybe there's more to the story. Maybe, and just maybe, it was all a misunderstanding. At least that's what he hopes. But Crowley won't tell him, not after what he did. He shouldn't have read those damned notes. He never saw Crowley like that before. The way he acted, the pain in his voice. It all confirms that those notes must truly have been about him. That doesn't help, it only makes Aziraphale feel worse. His mind gets swarmed by different ways to try and fix things. None of them are good enough. He lets the tears dry on his face.

    "I don't know how to fix this" he utters.

    He feels unable to help. It could be that Crowley would be better alone. His presence seems to have dismantled all of his stability. But leaving him alone at that moment was cruel. He won't push his limits, that will only aggravate their situation. He just needs to let him know he's not alone. As he thinks about the best way to the that, he walks to his room and finds his small notebook. All the notes were written there. He looks at the pages and rips them out one by one.

    "This was a mistake" he thinks as he takes those pages to the fireplace.

    In his room, Crowley carefully puts down the book. His every movement had to be actively thought out as if his mind was too busy to carry him. He uses his last efforts to get himself in bed. His whole body had a slight trembling that only he could feel. He could hear his heart beating fast to the point it was painful.

    "Everything is going back to normal" he mutters.

    He will continue living in his house close to his plants and away from people. But why does it hurt to have things back? The things he so desperately wanted to get back. His piece, his routine, his environment, everything the way he wants without any interference. Aziraphale will leave and he'll have it all back. That's what he wants. But it hurts and it will continue to hurt, he knows that. Hope has broken him once more. He's angry that he allowed that to happen. That feeling, that useless feeling, it shouldn't have returned. It will die off again, permanently this time Crowley wishes. It shouldn't be too much to ask. But he had another problem at the moment. He's remembering everything.

    These memories weren't forgotten or taken away, but they were kept at a great distance. They aren't good. Crowley lived them once, he doesn't want to relive them over and over again. But the gates are open now, and all the memories are rushing in like a river of unheard cries for help. All his senses were overwhelmed with past events and there was nothing he could do. All he's able to do is close his eyes and stay still until it passes. It will all pass and go back to normal, everything will be as it once was.

    He stays in his room, completely blind to the passing of time, and ends up hearing a knock on the door. It sounded real. He opens his eyes and sees something sliding in from under the door. As he grasps reality better he hears steps moving away from his door. There was a small piece of paper on the floor. Without giving it much thought he moves in its direction. It looked like a page ripped from a notebook and it had something written on it.

    "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you. You don't have to talk. Take your time. I'm here if you need me".

    Crowley reads the letter slowly, taking in every word. He could still feel a hint of fear coming from Aziraphale. It pains him to see him scared again but he knows he can't judge him.

    "I would be scared too" he whimpers and holds the paper close to him.

    But what Aziraphale felt the most was concern.

    Crowley thinks. He clears out a small space in his mind, like the eye of a tornado, and stays there. He knows he can't leave his room, not yet at least. He wonders how long he would have to stay there for Aziraphale to leave. He knows there's no answer to that question. If he stays there long enough Aziraphale will come to check on him. But why is he still there? Could it be solely because he wants to know the truth? Or is his concern real? Crowley doesn't know anymore. He's tired. As soon as he loses focus, his memories surround him again with no time to lose. With all that chaos he finds it hard to see but there was something still lurking inside his mind. It is like a ghost, present in every heartbeat. It's the last glimpse of hope, hiding in plain sight. That note Aziraphale left him was keeping it there, haunting him.

    Crowley opens his eyes as he hears nothing but silence. His head hurts but at least the thoughts seem to have calmed down. It was already dark outside, it had been for a few hours now. He leaves his room to go get a glass of water. After looking around the hallway he doesn't see Aziraphale anywhere. But as he passes by the living room he hears something. He gets closer to the couch and sees Aziraphale sleeping there holding onto the book they were reading. He didn't look comfortable, he most likely didn't mean to fall asleep there. Crowley looks at him for a second thinking of what to do. He calls for him.

    "Aziraphale?" he says almost whispering.

    He sees him move slightly for a couple of seconds but then he immediately wakes up and rushes to leave the couch. He almost steps on Crowley as he tries to go towards the hallway. When he notices him there he stops.

    "Crowley" he says "Are you- How are you feeling?".

    He struggles to find the right words with his brain still half asleep.

    "I just came to get a glass of water" he answers.

    "Yes, of course" he answers holding onto his own hands.

    "Why were you sleeping there?".

    "I didn't mean to" he says picking up the book that fell with all that commotion.

    They stay silent for a couple of long seconds.

    "I want to say I'm sorry" Aziraphale states "I shouldn't have hidden those notes, I shouldn't have read them either. I could try to explain but there's no excuse. I'm sorry that I did that and I'm sorry for what it made you go through. But you don't have to explain what happened. I'm sorry".

    Aziraphale tries his best to maintain eye contact with Crowley as he apologizes.

    "Why are you still here?" he asks with a numb tone of voice.

    "I didn't want to leave you like this. I'm usually good at fixing things. But I don't know what I'm supposed to do this time".

    "If you're talking about me, I don't need fixing. I've been doing fine".

    "No, it's not you. I don't know how to fix what happened today".

    Aziraphale holds the book close to himself.

    "What happened today" Crowley says measuring his words carefully "Wasn't completely your fault. I appreciate your apology for the notes. But that's the only thing you're to blame for".

    "But that man only said those things because I was there, he probably wouldn't have said anything to you".

    "That doesn't make it your fault. He's always trying to hit a nerve and today he succeeded. It's not your fault. If anything it's mine. I wasn't ready to be reminded of those memories. I just want to forget everything. And I didn't want you to know. You're the only person who isn't afraid of me. But you still got scared. It's not your fault, I would be scared too. I just wasn't prepared".

    He takes a moment to breathe and avoid waking up his memories.

    "I'm sorry" he says "I know you aren't going to stay much longer anyway but I don't want you here if you don't feel safe".

    Aziraphale takes a few seconds to think on what to say.

    "I know what you said is true, and that article confirmed it. But it's hard to believe that you would do something like that".

    "I didn't want you to find out like this".

    Aziraphale stays quiet and glances at Crowley a few times, seemingly wanting to ask for something but unable to bring himself to do it.

    "What?" Crowley asks.

    "Nothing, it's nothing. I shouldn't ask".

    "Ask what?".

    "If today didn't happen the way it did, how would you have liked for me to find out?".

    He thinks silently. If it was up to him, he would prefer that Aziraphale never knew. But if he had to tell him it wouldn't be like this.

    "You don't have to tell me the story of that day. I just want to know how you would have told me".

    "I..." Crowley says unable to form a full sentence.

    He looks at Aziraphale's blue eyes shining in the dark of the night. He slithers away slowly, glancing at Aziraphale to show he will be right back. He patiently waits and some minutes later Crowley returns with some food and water.

    "I would bring you something to eat" he says still somewhat distant in his thoughts "I would ask if I could talk to you. I would say that it's something serious. And then I would show you that newspaper".

    He stops for a second and Aziraphale lets him take his time.

    "I would tell you that you can leave if you want. And if you were willing to listen to me I would answer your questions, tell you more than what's on that paper. Or I would try at least".

    "It isn't easy for you to talk about that, is it?" Aziraphale asks gently.

    "Not really".

    "Well, thank you for telling me how you would have told me. I think it would have gone better for the both of us".

    Aziraphale picks up a strawberry from the plate Crowley brought and eats it.

    "I don't know if I can answer your questions now. But I can still tell you what happened that day".

    "You don't have to" Aziraphale clarifies.

    "I know I don't. But I think I would like to try to fix things too".

    Aziraphale scotches away from Crowley and gestures for him to get on the couch. Both their hearts beat fast as he slithers up the couch rolling up next to Aziraphale. He takes a deep breath and feels his memories creeping up on him. He's not sure why he's doing that. Maybe if he does it this way Aziraphale will forget what happened earlier.

    "It doesn't change anything" he thinks "Even if he were to forget the story will stay the same".

    He could scare Aziraphale for him to leave but that doesn't seem right. He could've also stayed quiet. Even better, he could have stayed in his room. But something keeps pulling him towards Aziraphale. He contemplates all the information inside his mind and tries to isolate the memories that matter at the moment.

    "Might as well tell him now that I remember" he thinks.

    But it's easier said than done. The words wouldn't come out. Aziraphale gives him time, he doesn't want to be pushy in an already stressful situation, be he notices Crowley struggling.

    "It's okay" he says softly "It will be okay".

    Crowley looks at him nervously and gathers his strength to start talking. After a deep breath, Crowley recounts the events of that day.

Author's note

    Here's chapter 14 of "The Serpent's carnations"! Crowley seems to have a lot of secrets but the truth is starting to come out. What do you think happened on that day? I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 15

    Quick warning: the first part of this chapter contains descriptions of violent acts. If you’re caught up with the story you know what’s about to go down. The descriptions aren’t too detailed and I don’t think it would be worth marking the AO3 warning for the whole story. But if these themes affect you proceed with caution. Ok, I’ll let you go back to reading! Hope you like it!

    It was around 15 years ago during a rainy evening. Crowley was in that same house and he could sense something was about to happen. He started to hear sounds coming from outside. He thought it was another person messing with his garden but as he opened the front door an unexpected vision stood before him. There was a group of people standing there, all of them carrying some sort of weapon.

    "They wanted me dead".

    Even though Crowley avoids some details as he tells the story, Aziraphale pays attention to every word.

    Back then he couldn't keep those people away, there were too many rushing into his house. Some tried cornering him while a few started to touch his belongings. They broke things and threw them at Crowley as well. They weren't going to let him go.

    "So I attacked them" Crowley says as he remembers those moments vividly.

    He managed to paralyze some of them with his venom but that can only take him so far as they were in a big number. He knew they wouldn't leave without succeeding, he needed a way out. One of the men there stood out to him, he was giving all the orders. At that moment there was only one idea stuck inside his mind.

    "I rolled myself around him".

    And then he did the same to the people who tried to stop him. He was a little smaller but that didn't matter. He was filled with rage, fear, and pain. The few left unharmed tried to free the ones he was holding onto. They couldn't.

    "I could hear screams" Crowley says "I felt bones breaking".

    His voice almost turns into a whisper as his mind dissociates further away from that moment. He stops talking but the story continues passing before his eyes.

    Aziraphale hasn't looked away from Crowley since he started talking. No words can describe what it's like to listen to that story. Every word was sharp and painful to hear, he can only imagine how it must feel to carry those experiences. He thought about asking him to stop but couldn't bring himself to do it. It wasn't a matter of curiosity anymore. He knew enough. But Crowley finally wanted to share that story with him. And if it's hard to hear it's most definitely worse to say. Aziraphale won't make it harder on him than it already is. He'll keep on listening until the end of the story. But then he stops. The silence fills the room. But lack of sound doesn't always mean quiet. It was paralyzing, Aziraphale could barely breathe. He sees Crowley's eyes moving around in the distance and his body slowly moving closer together.

    "Crowley" he says softly "Take a deep breath. You're doing your best but you don't have to push yourself. You're safe now. And nothing bad will happen if you don't finish the story. No one's here to hurt you. It's just you and me. And it will be okay".

    Crowley can hear Aziraphale's voice and is guided by it. He slowly gets closer to reality again and takes a deep breath with his eyes closed. He reorganizes the train of thought he was following and clears his throat before speaking again.

    "As I was saying, they tried to pull me away".

    They couldn't do it successfully, not even with violence. Crowley wasn't feeling the pain at the moment because of the adrenaline. When one of the men reached for his head he bit him as well. He tried to wrap around his arm but he didn't expect that man to roll with him and hold him down to the floor. Before the venom took effect, he grabbed a knife ready to make a clean cut. Crowley doesn't know what happened next, not even now that those memories returned so vividly. He just remembers feeling a deep agonizing pain as it became harder to breathe. He slowly loosened his grip. Some people were free but it was too late for a couple of them.

    "I remember seeing people running. Dragging others out of my house. Asking for help. They all left thinking I was dead".

    Somehow he managed to stop the bleeding before passing out. It took him weeks to get stable and months to completely heal.

    After finishing the story, Crowley looks at Aziraphale again. He was holding back his tears and his lower lip was trembling.

    "Thank you for sharing that with me" he struggles to say.

    "If it was up to me you wouldn't know anything about this. That man just had to open his mouth" Crowley grumbles.

    "He doesn't seem very nice…".

    "He's the one that tried to cut my head off".

    Aziraphale stops, completely paralyzed by those words. The tears he was struggling to hold back dried out, almost evaporated by a sudden anger growing inside him. Aziraphale clenches his fists. None of that was right. But as he looks to Crowley he sees his expression. He may sound slightly calmer but his eyes are wide open and his pupils are still thin. He takes a deep breath and relaxes his hands. Getting upset won't help.

    "How do you feel now?" Aziraphale asks after a few moments of silence.

    "Honestly, I'm not sure. I rarely think about these things, they're better put away. But I don't think talking made it worse" Crowley replies "It went better than I expected".

    "What did you think would happen?".

    "I don't know. You would fill me up with questions? Or you'd just run away… But you didn't do either of those things".

    "Actually, I have one question. You don't have to answer it. I won't even tell you what it is if you don't want to know. But I don't need a detailed answer, just a yes or a no is enough".

    "What is it about?".

    "Something you said earlier".

    Crowley thinks for a few seconds and glances at Aziraphale.

    "You can ask".

    He takes a deep breath and gathers the right words for his question.

    "When you showed me the news article you said it wasn't the first time. I don't need to know what happened, I just want to know if you ever had a choice not to do it".

    Crowley thinks. He tries not to remember. But he did have a choice. It wasn't a nice choice but he could have let it happen. Then he would be the only one dead. But if Aziraphale is asking then he probably doesn't think that was a valid choice to begin with.

    "No. I don't think I could have chosen anything else".

    "Thank you for answering" Aziraphale says.

    He thought he would feel some relief knowing that Crowley didn't want to do something like that. But he didn't. It just means that Crowley was left with no choice at least a couple of times. That doesn't sit well with Aziraphale.

    "And how are you feeling?" Crowley asks turning his head toward Aziraphale.

    "To be honest, it made me a little scared".

    "Scared of what?".

    Crowley couldn't feel his fear. It had faded away again. There were some unknown emotions mixed together but fear wasn't one of them.

    "Of something like that happening again".

    "It won't".

    "How can you be so sure?".

    "You saw it, they do anything not to get me angry. As long as they're scared, they won't do anything. And ‘returning from the dead’ will forever scare them".

    Aziraphale goes quiet for a few seconds.

    "I suppose you know them better than I do. But if you ever feel like they're planning something, you can come to me. You'd be safe".

    "Thank you, but I don't think terrorizing another town would be a great plan, especially not a fancy place with a library".

    Aziraphale lets out a short breath almost laughing.

    "It isn't all that fancy" he says "But it's just an idea. You don't have to come if you don't want to".

    Crowley sees Aziraphale trying to make light of the situation. He has a soft, tired smile resting on his face. He likes to see him smile.

    "Well, if you're that concerned, I guess you can visit me from time to time" he says mumbling some of the words.

    "Oh, really?" Aziraphale asks with a relieved smile on his lips.

    "Yeah, but don't make it a habit. I can't keep on being a scary snake if there's a jolly bubbly guy knocking on my door regularly".

    Aziraphale smiles softly and Crowley feels some of his anxiety go away. He slithers a little closer to Aziraphale waiting to see his reaction. He sees that and removes his hands from his lap to make space for Crowley. He rests his head on his legs and closes his eyes. Aziraphale's hand graze gently upon his scales. Earlier that day, they weren't sure if they would be like this again. It's true that there's still some tension in the air, but they're working on doing better.

    "Aziraphale?" Crowley asks with his heart beating fast.

    "Yes?".

    "Thank you. For being patient with me".

    Aziraphale gently lifts Crowley's face and he slithers to his shoulder almost guided by an unknown instinct. Aziraphale hugs him and feels Crowley snuggling on his shoulder against his neck.

    "You're welcome dear".

    Crowley's eyes open wide as he hears those words. Well, not all the words. Just the last one. "Dear". Was Aziraphale refering to him? Or is it just a way of speaking? He isn't sure.

    Aziraphale feels Crowley getting closer to him. Maybe he's trying to hug him too, even without arms.

    "It's still hard to believe you aren't afraid" he says softly "I don't know if you're brave or an idiot".

    "I don't think I'm brave" Aziraphale ponders "But I also don't think I'm an idiot. I just prefer to see the good in others".

    "I don't think there was a lot of 'good' to see today" Crowley responds.

    "Please don't say that" Aziraphale asks "You always try to hide your best parts from me. Almost like you want me to think the worst of you".

    His voice starts to shake as he gets filled with a sudden deep sadness.

    "I understand why you did that in the beginning of why you do that to other people. You want to scare everyone away because it's dangerous not to be feared. But you know I'm not afraid and I hope you know I won't hurt you. You don't need to keep that act for me".

    Crowley goes quiet for a few seconds. There's no reason not to trust him. But choosing to trust someone is a difficult decision. At least that's a choice he can make for himself. Crowley slithers around Aziraphale's neck and looks at him. He opens his eyes but continues to hug Crowley.

    "I won't do that anymore. It's a promise".

    "Thank you. And I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought it up".

    "It's alright".

    Aziraphale closes his eyes and leans on Crowley.

    "You should get some rest" he says "In your bed this time, it was a long day and you get better rest there".

    "You should get some sleep too" Aziraphale answers "To rest your mind".

    "It's okay, I slept until a while ago".

    The truth is that Crowley does not want to sleep. He's afraid of dreaming again. Sleep could help him but the last thing he needs now is a nightmare. And that night, Aziraphale is nervous about sleeping too. He isn't sure if he can rest his mind.

    "I think I need some tea" he says.

    "Don't worry, I'll bring that to your room in a few minutes. But take that food with you, I don't know if you're hungry but maybe eating will be good too".

    "Thank you, I will".

    Crowley slithers to the kitchen and Aziraphale goes to his room quietly.

    While alone, Crowley takes a few moments to breathe and clear his mind. A lot happened in little time. He's sure he hasn't properly processed most of it. But for now, he doesn't have the energy to think. He stares blankly at the water waiting patiently. When he goes to Aziraphale's room, he's sitting in bed nibbling on something.

    "Here you go". He thanks Crowley as he picks up the teacup.

    "Do you want some? It may work now, you aren't as grumpy anymore".

    "I'm good, but thank you".

    Crowley notices something strange. It's visible that Aziraphale has questions for him, but they don't seem to be about him. It looks like he wants to ask him for something but is nervous to do it.

    "Are you alright?" he asks.

    "Yeah, I'm fine. Just need a good night of sleep" he answers smiling.

    Crowley looks at Aziraphale, who avoids looking back.

    "Can I ask you something?" he says hesitantly.

    "What is it?".

    "Can you keep me company tonight?".

    Aziraphale waits for an answer while his heart beats increasingly faster.

    "You want me to stay here?" Crowley asks perplexed.

    "I just don't want to be alone. I don't know if that's too much to ask".

    He holds the teacup tight. He was too worried about Crowley before but now that things are calmer everything is dawning on him. His hands have a subtle tremble to them and his mind is going through different scenarios on how to make things better. There's nothing he can do now. Nothing will change what happened.

    "I can stay" Crowley says.

    "Thank you".

    Aziraphale moves over on the bed giving space for Crowley to join him as he finishes his tea. After he's done, he gets under the covers and Crowley lays beside him.

    "Are you worried about something?" he asks.

    "I guess I'm worried about a lot of things. The problem is that I don't know how to make things okay".

    "If there's nothing to do then wouldn't it be better just to let it be?" Crowley asks and Aziraphale looks at him.

    "There's always something to do. I just need to think a little more".

    "Right now all you need to do is get some sleep. You can worry tomorrow".

    "Thank you, Crowley".

    They stay quiet. Aziraphale closes his eyes and tries to fall asleep. Knowing that Crowley is next to him makes him feel better. If something happened to one of them they wouldn't be alone. He knows nothing will happen, it would be too much of a coincidence, but his subconscious doesn't seem to agree.

    Crowley glances at Aziraphale occasionally but his mind starts zoning off to somewhere else. Maybe he's also getting sleepy. Or maybe it's another vivid memory. I could be both. He stays in that strange limbo of conscience for a good time until he hears something.

    Aziraphale is already asleep, but his face has a slight frown to it. He's mumbling something but no words actually come out. Crowley gets closer to try and understand what's going on but Aziraphale moves. He reaches out for him, or for something else perhaps. Crowley's instinct tells him to move back but he doesn't. He lets Aziraphale find him and he immediately leans closer. Crowley feels him breathing. It was peaceful. But as he moved around he left the cover of the bed sheets. Crowley isn't particularly warm so without the blanket Aziraphale would get cold easily. He slithers around a bit and manages to pull the blanket on top of them both. It was warm but different from being next to the fireplace or out in the sun. This felt better. He looks at Aziraphale once again. He's still afflicted with something.

    "Is it a nightmare?" Crowley thinks.

    He contemplates his options for a few seconds. He could wake him up and try to calm him down.

    "If the nightmare is about me, I don't think he would like to see me".

    He could let him be, nightmares can sometimes shift to normal dreams. Or he could try to calm him down without waking him.

    "If it was me, I would like someone to help me" he thinks making his decision.

    He slithers carefully and looks closely at Aziraphale. He's still making some sounds, but now he's trying to hide his face as well. Crowley gets closer to him and whispers.

    "You're okay. Everything will be okay. You are safe. Nothing bad will happen".

    He continues for a few seconds but suddenly he feels something. It was like a high-pitched shriek but there was no sound. Aziraphale was worried about him. He knew that Aziraphale felt some concern, he had that figured out, but it skyrocketed in that moment. It was too much at the same time.

    "No…" he hears Aziraphale whisper.

    Was it an actual word? Or did it sound like it among all the muttering?

    "It's okay, I'm right here" Crowley says.

    He holds Aziraphale too, in the way that he can at least. He lays over him like a weighted blanket.

    "Don't make me wake you" he thinks impatiently waiting for Aziraphale's dream to pass.

    It did after a few minutes. Crowley feels everything returning to normal. He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes. He can't escape the exhaustion and soon falls asleep too.

Author's note

    Here's chapter 15 of "The Serpent's carnations"! A little bit of Crowley's backstory, our guy has been through some stuff. But at least they talked and things seem to be getting better. What do you think these two will do when they wake up? I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 16

    There was no sun in the sky that morning. Some raindrops hit the window. It wasn't loud, but it was enough for Aziraphale to hear. He slowly wakes up and looks towards the sound. Then to the other side and sees a plate on the side table. It still had some food from the previous night. Aziraphale closes his eyes for a couple of seconds and takes a deep breath. There was something else noteworthy. Or, in this case, someone. But Aziraphale knows, he can feel Crowley resting all around him. He's sleeping quietly and seems to be doing alright. Aziraphale was still a little tired, he spent the night dreaming. He doesn't know what they were about precisely, but he still has remnants of what he felt. They're cloudy but not pleasant. He remembers Crowley's presence. And he remembers his library too. And that's about all he can recall. He decides to stay in bed for a little while longer. He is not going to sleep again, but taking a few quiet moments to organize and process yesterday's events seems like a good idea.

    What happened 15 years ago shouldn't have. It could have been avoided. But it's not Crowley's fault. People attacked him, but what they didn't expect was his ability to fight back.

    "I'm sure he wouldn't hurt them otherwise" he thinks turning his face to Crowley.

    He feels him breathing slowly and can't help but wonder why they would attack him in the first place. Maybe something happened prior to that. Maybe it was a response to fear. Maybe they were just hateful people. He doesn't know what's worse to believe in. What could Crowley have done to deserve that sort of consequence? Surely it would have had to be something atrocious. That can't be true. But if it isn't then those people were so full of fear and hate that they decided to act in such a monstrous way. On its own, that's already enough to be worried about. But since that day all those years ago, all Crowley has done is guarantee he's feared. It's hard to imagine what else he would do, it's not as if he has a lot of options. But if fear was the cause of the problem in the first place, there's a chance that day will repeat itself.

    "No, no, that won't happen" Aziraphale reassures himself "There must be something we can do".

    Aziraphale takes a deep breath and thinks. But his train of thought is interrupted soon after. Crowley's starting to move.

    As his awareness starts to function, he opens his eyes and immediately looks at Aziraphale. To his surprise, he's awake and looking back at him.

    "Good morning Crowley" he says with a smile.

    "Good morning" he answers "Have you been awake for long?".

    "No, just for a few minutes".

    "And did you sleep well?".

    "I'm not sure. I had some dreams tonight that I don't quite remember but I don't think they were good".

    "I figured, you were a bit agitated last night. You kept mumbling something, I couldn't understand what you were saying".

    "Oh, I'm sorry" Aziraphale says.

    Crowley sees his soft smile fade away.

    "It's alright, it's not a big deal".

    Aziraphale remains quiet but avoids looking at Crowley in the eyes.

    "Is everything okay?" he asks confused.

    "Yes, it's fine" Aziraphale answers a tad nervously "I just didn't know I still talk in my sleep".

    "Is it a bad thing?".

    "It used to be".

    "Can I ask why?" Crowley says gently.

    The room stays silent for a few moments. Aziraphale closes his eyes for a second and listens to the rain. It was calming.

    "I would sleep talk when I was younger" he says "It wasn't good".

    "Would you say bad things?" Crowley asks.

    "I don't know. But my dad didn't like it. He would pray with me for it to stop. He even had our local priest join us sometimes. It wouldn't help. I would wake up to his prayers almost every night. I didn't think praying could be scary, it shouldn't be. But it was".

    He stops for a moment to try and organize his thoughts. Crowley notices it and rests his head on his chest. Aziraphale takes a deep breath and distracts himself by stroking Crowley.

    "Some years later when I started to live on my own I would sleep better. It's not perfect as you know but it was worse before. I thought it had stopped, the talking. But I don't think it did. I'm sorry".

    "You don't have to apologize for that. There's nothing wrong with talking in your sleep. It wasn't even loud, you were just making some noises. It's alright".

    "You mean it?" Aziraphale asks and Crowley looks at him.

    "Of course, you don't have to worry about it".

    He smiles and hugs Crowley.

    "Thank you".

    "You're welcome".

    "What would you like to do today?" Aziraphale asks after eating some breakfast.

    "I'm probably going to the garden a little bit".

    "It's raining outside so come back in when you start to get cold".

    "Don't worry, I won't take that long. And while I'm out there you can think of something we can do in the afternoon maybe?".

    "I will" he answers smiling.

    After Crowley left for the garden, Aziraphale wandered around the house lost in his thoughts again. Is there something he can do to make sure Crowley stays safe? It doesn't seem to be but he still tries to come up with some sort of plan. He wasn't going to act without talking with Crowley first, but he would like to have a plan before having that conversation.

    "It's useless" he says to himself "Nothing will work".

    Aziraphale sits on the couch and sighs. But as he's looking around something gives him an idea. He sees a ball, a little bit damaged but still fixable. It belonged to those kids, he took it home that day. His eyes shine as a plan begins to form inside his mind.

    At the same time, Crowley's outside taking care of the garden. His plants are doing well but he senses the weather will get worse soon so it's better to get some work done. But he's distracted, he almost doesn't notice the rain. Something feels different. It is cold outside, but he almost feels warmer than usual. His heart continues to beat fast but now he isn't sure about the reason.

    "It can't be".

    Crowley stays very still, almost trying not to be noticed by something or someone. He tries to focus with his eyes closed, scared to find the truth but desperately wanting to. He stares face to face with Aziraphale's feelings, taking his time to properly identify what's going on.

    The front door opens and Crowley gets in. Aziraphale hears him and follows the hallway in his direction.

    "I was about to call you in" he says "You're probably cold so I drew you a warm bath".

    "Oh, thank you. You didn't have to".

    "I know, just thought you'd enjoy something like that".

    "I think I will, thank you".

    "Go on then, before the water gets cold".

    Crowley slithers to the bathroom quietly and gets in the tub. The water felt hot on his skin but after a few seconds it was lovely. He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes for a few seconds. He knows what he has to do. When he was outside he managed to sort Aziraphale's feelings. He actually cares for him. But could that be enough? Crowley isn't sure, that's what he needs to figure out. After being lost in his thoughts for some time he finally gets ready. To say that it's been a while since he last did it would be an understatement. It's been decades since he last tried and even more since he last succeeded. He apprehensively closes his eyes, it helps him concentrate. He can feel it, like a chill running through his body. He's doing it, he's finally doing it! But he stops almost immediately.

    "It can’t be" he whispers with his voice slightly shaking.

    His expression quickly changes from shocked to determined. Now he knows. He knows he can do it. His hope wasn't lying to him, there was indeed a chance of this happening. He tries again, this time not just to test if he can do it but to see how far he can actually take it.

    Aziraphale was in the kitchen delightful to make some lunch. But he hears a scream accompanied by a loud sound. They were coming from the bathroom. He drops everything on the counter and runs.

    "Crowley?" he asks standing in front of the door.

    Silence.

    "Crowley?!" he repeats louder.

    Still nothing.

    "I'm coming in" he announces and opens the door.

    Had he opened the door a few seconds earlier he would see a completely different scene. He wouldn't see Crowley lying on the floor. Instead, a human-like figure would be there. But Aziraphale didn't see that. He kneels down on the wet floor next to Crowley.

    "Are you hurt? What happened?" he asks worried.

    Crowley was lying on the floor next to Aziraphale but, in reality, he wasn't present at the moment. He could only hear his heart racing and the muffled sound of Aziraphale’s voice. Some seconds later, Crowley's eyes shift in his direction.

    "Sorry" he says trembling "I got water everywhere".

    "Don't worry about that, just tell me if you're hurt. I heard a scream".

    "I don't think I am".

    "Come on, let's get you somewhere more comfortable".

    Crowley looks at him unable to speak and slithers closer hoping for a hug. He feels Aziraphale's arms around him and leans closer.

    "It's okay, everything is okay" he whispers "Just hold on to me for a second alright?".

    "Why? What are you-".

    Crowley is interrupted by Aziraphale scooping him up from the floor. He slithers around him quickly trying his best to hold on.

    "What do you think you're doing? Put me down! I'm going to fall!" he protests.

    "You're not going to fall, just stay still".

    He holds onto Aziraphale who carries him to the front of the fireplace.

    "Here you go" he says as he puts Crowley down "Do you want to tell me what happened?".

    "I just got scared. And then I fell".

    "Did you hit your head when you fell?".

    "I don't think so".

    "I think there's been a lot happening, it would be better to take it easy for at least a couple of days".

    "I agree".

    Aziraphale smiles softly and gets up.

    "I'm going to check how lunch is going, and I'll change into some dry clothes too. But I'll be right back alright?".

    "Alright".

    Crowley stays next to the fireplace and soon after he's dry and warm again. At first glance, he doesn't seem distressed or bothered in any way. He looks quite peaceful, especially considering what just happened. But being quiet and being calm are two very different things. There's so much to think about. He's desperate to do something, anything, but afraid of what will happen after. He's overwhelmed with joy while feeling so much grief. It sounds contradicting, and it is. His emotions are in a never-ending fight with each other, trying to see who's the strongest, who will come through to him. But while they're absorbed by that useless battle, Crowley stays numb. Empty. What should he even think in that moment? Everything is upside down. But maybe Aziraphale is right. They should rest for the next few days. Resting sounds good to him.

    "Do you want some?" Aziraphale asks Crowley.

    "Hum?" he asks distracted.

    "Some food".

    "No, I'm good, thank you".

    Azirphale smiles and starts to eat next to Crowley.

    "Actually..." he says lifting his head "Can I still have a little bit?".

    "Of course, here. If you're hungry I can always make you something".

    "I'm not hungry, just want to try it".

    Crowley tastes the food. It was different again, but it tasted good. Almost nostalgic.

    "I think I know what we could do today" Aziraphale says.

    "What is it?".

    "We could read a couple of chapters of the book. And if you're tired you can take a nap while I draw".

    "That sounds nice".

    Crowley leans against Aziraphale while he finishes eating his lunch. Soon after he leaves for a moment, returning to the living room with the book. Crowley's already on the couch but he lets Aziraphale sit. He slithers around his neck and comfortably rests his head on his shoulder. They read a few chapters of the book, starting by rereading a couple of pages to remember where they left the story. Aziraphale occasionally glances at Crowley and sees his eyes round. His heart melts in relief. He has only seen thin pupils lately, it's good to see him enjoying himself again.

    "Crowley?" he says closing the book after finishing a chapter.

    "Yes?".

    "Your eyes are beautiful, you know that?".

    They're looking at each other and Crowley is speechless for a moment. He sees Aziraphale's face turning red and his soft smile becoming embarrassed.

    "Thank you. I think you may be the first to like them".

    They quietly avoid looking at each other for a few awkward seconds. Crowley ends up breaking the silence with a yawn.

    "I think you should take a nap. Would you like that?".

    Crowley nods and they rearrange themselves on the couch. He wasn't sure if he would fall asleep. But he could hear Aziraphale's heart beating and feel his hands against his scales. It made him feel safe. He can't stop his mind from wondering if one day he will be able to actually hug him. Aziraphale makes a few sketches that afternoon but ends up falling asleep. Crowley notices his hands stopped moving and opens his eyes. He feels Aziraphale's chest move up and down with every breath. Deep down he wishes to live in that moment permanently. Everything is peaceful. But that's not reality. The truth is scarier. But it's best to enjoy the good moments while they last.

    A couple hours pass and Aziraphale wakes up feeling hungry. He stretches and when he opens his eyes he sees Crowley looking at him.

    "Oh, hello" he says flustered.

    "Did you sleep well?".

    "I did. But I think I'm going to start making dinner, I'm getting peckish" he says getting up.

    "Wait".

    Aziraraphale stops and looks at Crowley.

    "Yes?".

    "I think..." Crowley says nervously "Can we have dinner together?".

    "Of course" Aziraphale smiles "I don't see why you would ask, we've done it plenty of times".

    "No, I mean actually have dinner together. The both of us?".

    "Oh" he says surprised "Won't the food make you sick? I can make you something different".

    "There's no need, it will be okay this time".

    "Then I don't see why not".

    Aziraphale can't help but blush a little. Crowley would do the same but he can't. Instead, he leans in closer. Aziraphale hugs him for a moment before going to the kitchen. When he met Crowley he never expected this from him. He could almost be described as cuddly.

    "I doubt he would like to be called that" Aziraphale thinks as he glances at Crowley on the couch "But it's surprising how charming he can be".

    When dinner's ready, Crowley helps set the table. They sit next to one another and Aziraphale fills their plates with freshly cooked food. Everything is going how it tends to go. They chat about some random topic they find interesting, have a laugh or two, but, as usual, Aziraphale seems to be the only one eating.

    "Do you not like the food? You barely touched it" he asks.

    "No, it's not that" Crowley responds feeling embarrassed "It's stupid".

    "Don't say that, I'm sure it's not. What seems to be the problem?".

    Crowley looks at him and then looks away without saying a word. Aziraphale tries to figure out what the problem might be. He tosses ideas around until one of them makes him gasp.

    "Oh dear, I'm so sorry, I didn't even think about it. Do you need help cutting your food? I'm sorry, I didn't even notice you don't have hands. I mean, I did notice. Of course I noticed, that's silly".

    Aziraphale gets lost in his ramble due to his nervousness. Crowley stares at him intrigued about how long he'll keep on talking.

    "It's not that" he eventually says putting an end to Aziraphale's panicked speech "I'm not used to eating in front of others. At least not this much".

    "I see. Is it because you're a snake?".

    "Of course it is" Crowley says frustrated "Have you ever seen a snake eat?".

    "Not really I guess. But you don't have to be embarrassed".

    Crowley rests his head on the table and looks at Aziraphale.

    "I just don't want you to see it, it's not 'pretty’ to look at" he mumbles.

    "Well, eating can be messy sometimes. It isn't always 'pretty'".

    "You make it seem like it is".

    Aziraphale was going to say something, there were plenty of perfectly good and well-thought-out sentences to pick from, but he couldn't. He feels his face getting increasingly hot. Crowley isn't even looking at him, he's just unbothered looking in some other way. But when he notices the silence he glances at Aziraphale.

    "What? Why are you all red?".

    "Did you just call me pretty?" he stutters.

    He lifts his head from the table with his eyes wide open.

    "I- I didn't- That's not- You're just always very delicate and- Shit!" Crowley stumbles upon his words "I mean, you look like you belong in a castle or something".

    Aziraphale looks at him and lets out a soft laugh. It was sweet to see him careful with his words while frantically trying to find the right ones.

    "I can close my eyes so that you can eat without being worried" he says still blushing "Or I can cut your food into a few smaller pieces, that way you can eat like you usually do. What would you prefer?".

    "I'm not a child for you to cut my food" Crowley utters slightly annoyed and embarrassed "I don't need someone to cut my food".

    "You're just being grumpy now. We both know you don't need it, but that way we would actually eat together. Is that not what you want?".

    He takes a deep breath and puts his stubbornness aside for a moment.

    "Alright. I would like that".

    Aziraphale can almost see a smile form on Crowley's face during dinner after that.

Author's note

    Here's chapter 16 of "The Serpent's carnations"! Crowley's story continues to be revealed. What do you think happened to him? I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 17

    Quick warning: some moments in this chapter contain descriptions of violent acts. Just like in Chapter 15, the descriptions aren’t too detailed. Violence won't be a predominant part of the story, but it is present in a few moments. Because of that, I don’t think it would be worth marking the AO3 warning for the whole story. I promise that there will be many more wholesome moments!! But proceed with caution if these themes affect you. I’ll let you go back to reading now! Hope you like it!

    It continued to rain that night, but neither Crowley nor Aziraphale were listening to it. They were putting the dishes away as they continued their chat.

    "I can't believe you actually stole a book" Crowley laughs surprised.

    "It wasn't stealing, that book belongs to the library and they should have returned it already. I could see it by their window every day catching dust. It's not my fault they left their window open one time. I was just doing my job".

    "Sure, sure. You didn't take it because you were still in the middle of the book when you lent it to them".

    "Of course not".

    Aziraphale closes the kitchen cabinet and takes a deep breath.

    "I know it isn't that late yet but I think we should go to bed earlier today".

    "Are you tired?".

    "I am a little. But did you have something you wanted to do?".

    Crowley stays quiet for a second. He hadn't planned anything, all he wanted to do was to keep talking with Aziraphale.

    "I guess not" he says looking down.

    "Well, I'm going to change then. But perhaps you'd like to join me for tea in a few minutes?".

    "I'll get it ready for you".

    "Thank you, dear. I'll be right back".

    Crowley's left alone contemplating that word again. He's still unsure of the meaning behind it, all he knows is that it makes his heart skip a beat every time. But as he's brewing the tea he also thinks about what happened earlier that day. It doesn't feel real. Had it not been for the pain he wouldn't have believed it. Shedding would always hurt. He knows he will have to hold on for a little longer until he tries again.

    "It wasn't perfect but it was something" he thinks.

    Crowley didn't imagine that day would ever come. But now that it did, he can't help but wonder if that's even a good thing. It's not like his situation has changed. Aziraphale brought a part of him back to reality, but everyone around him is still the same. Should he even tell him? How could he tell him such a thing? Is that even a good reason for him to tell Aziraphale? It seems pointless to talk about it, but Aziraphale is the cause, does that grant him the right to know?

    "Are you alright Crowley?".

    He looks back and sees Aziraphale walking into the kitchen.

    "Yes, of course. Just finished your tea".

    "Oh, thank you" he says smiling.

    He sits at the table drinking his tea and Crowley stays close to him.

    "Are you going to sleep too?".

    "I'll try".

    "Are you still nervous about sleeping? If it makes you feel safer, you can stay in my room. I felt better yesterday knowing you were there next to me".

    "You wouldn't mind?".

    "Not at all".

    "Thank you".

    "You're welcome dear" Aziraphale says smiling.

    Crowley didn't sleep well that night. He had a nightmare about when he was younger. But what happened after that was worse. He wakes up suddenly but takes a deep breath. But something wasn't right. He can feel Aziraphale next to him, but he isn't moving. Maybe he's sleeping but there's no warmth coming from him. That's when Crowley notices he's not just holding him, he's got him completely surrounded. He quickly slithers his head out of the covers and faces that hunting vision.

    "Crowley?" he hears Aziraphale say and this time he wakes up for good. But when he opened his eyes everything was cloudy, just like it was a few days ago.

    "Are you alright dear? You started to move-".

    "Are you hurt?" he asks impatiently.

    "No, everything is fine. Are you hurt? What happened?".

    "Nothing, it's nothing. Sorry I woke you".

    "I was already awake actually, just wanted you to get some more sleep. It might not have been the best idea".

    Crowley rests his head on Aziraphale's chest and takes a deep breath.

    "Next time I start moving in my sleep you have to wake me just like you did alright? Don't wait to see if it passes".

    "Don't worry, I will. Just take a few deep breaths, it's not good for you to start the day this way".

    Crowley closes his eyes and breathes. But as he gets calmer something else starts bothering him. His all body was itching and it was slowly growing. That together with the cloudy eyes can only mean one thing.

    "Is your skin shedding today?" Aziraphale asks.

    "I'm not sure if it will be today, maybe it'll take until tomorrow".

    "Do you need something to help?".

    "No, not really. But thank you".

    While Aziraphale eats his breakfast he sees Crowley roaming the house brushing against everything on his way.

    "Are you alright?" he asks.

    "Yeah, this is normal. Shedding just itches like hell".

    "I see".

    He finishes eating and walks towards the couch. After a few minutes of patiently waiting Crowley gets closer. When he passes by, he feels Aziraphale's hand stroking his scales and, without even thinking about it, he leans closer. He slithers up against his legs with his eyes closed and enjoys the scratches around his face.

    "Does that help?".

    "Uhmhum" Crowley says "You wouldn't believe how hard it is to not have hands in these moments".

    "I'm glad I can help".

    After a few minutes, he lays down on Aziraphale's lap and takes a deep breath.

    "I'm assuming you're going to stay in today".

    "Probably. Don't really feel like going out to the rain. But I won't stay put for long. I will have to get this off when it's more loose".

    "Is it hard?".

    "No, I'm used to it by now. I just have to move around and it will do its thing".

    "Well, since you're here right now, why don't we read a little?".

    "I would like that".

    Aziraphale reaches for the book and starts reading. He occasionally scratches Crowley who closes his eyes relieved from that terrible itchiness. That's his least favorite part of the whole ordeal. Not being able to see can be rather challenging but he knows his house well enough to get by. But being itchy and not being able to do anything about it is painful, it feels like his skin is burning.

    Aziraphale didn't mind helping him. It was as simple as it could be, and seeing Crowley lean against his hand like that is priceless.

    "Can I ask you something?" Crowley says hesitantly.

    "Of course, what it is?".

    "How many chapters are left of the book?".

    Aziraphale's smile starts to fade and his eyebrows turn worried.

    "Let me check... There are 5 left".

    "How long do you think it will take to finish?".

    "I'm not sure".

    Crowley hears Aziraphale putting the book down and feels his hands stroking him.

    "I don't know what's exactly worrying you but I can assure you of two things. I'm not staying here because I want to read a book. That wouldn't be a good enough reason to leave my library's fate out of my hands. And when I leave you can expect me to knock at your door again. I will be back to see you".

    "I think I'll miss you" Crowley says, his voice slowly breaking as he speaks.

    "Oh Crowley" he exhales "Come here".

    He slithers closer and Aziraphale gives him a tight hug.

    "I'll miss you too. But it's alright, everything will be alright".

    But what if it isn't? How can he be so sure when he doesn't even know all that's at stake? Crowley trembles trying to hold back his tears. He can't tell the truth to Aziraphale. Knowing won't help him with anything, it would only make things harder. He would probably want to know more and stay until he has more answers, but he has to go back to his library. If he stays longer he will lose it and who would be at fault? Crowley is stuck with an impossible decision but deep down he would rather be forgotten than hated by Aziraphale. He feels his heart beating fast and holds onto him.

    "You're right, everything will be alright" he agrees after making up his mind "I'm sorry".

    "It's alright, you seem to have a lot on your mind. Just take your time".

    Aziraphale held Crowley for as long as he needed. He is unsure about why he broke down like that, there must be something else bothering him. But he doesn't want to be invasive so he just tries to keep him company during the rest of the day. Crowley would wander around the house aimlessly and occasionally stop to rest.

    "It must be exhausting to shed the skin" he thinks "And being stressed surely mustn't help".

    Luckily it will pass soon, the shedding will at least. And he's sure Crowley will ask for help if he needs it.

    "You know what I've been thinking?" he asks that evening as he follows Crowley around the house.

    "What?".

    "Those kids are probably missing their ball. I could fix it and we can return it".

    "Thank you but I don't feel like terrorizing children".

    "Well, you can smell fear right?".

    "Sense, I don't smell it".

    "Right. Anyway, were they scared when they saw you last time?".

    "A little".

    "See, they aren't that scared. I bet they would be fascinated if they could talk to you".

    "I don't think that would happen".

    "I can't guarantee it but we've had plenty of kids in the library. They come with schools most times but they're always interested in the scary books. Kids just aren't afraid of the same things that we are. I think they will like you".

    "I don't think that would happen. But even if it does, what does it matter? They're just kids".

    "That's true, but kids are ruthless. But they're also stubborn which can be a good thing. If they like someone or something they will protect it at all costs. And they'll annoy their parents until they change their minds".

    "I don't think creating a kids army to protect me is necessary or a good idea".

    "That's not the way I would put it. I don't think you need to be protected by kids. But I've learned that teaching kids is a good way to teach the parents too. I'm not saying it's an all-proof plan but I thought it could help. We don't have to do it if you don't want to. I just thought it might help you feel safer while I'm gone".

    "Alright, I'll think about it tomorrow, but I don't promise I'll talk to those kids".

    Aziraphale smiles and starts to fix the ball. It won't be perfect, but it will hopefully be good enough. Crowley passes by him a few times and he can see the skin in his face starting to open revealing new shiny scales underneath.

    "Will you be able to sleep tonight?" Aziraphale asks as he works on his dinner.

    "Maybe a little but I probably won't sleep a lot until this gets off me. But that's alright, I can take a nap when it's over".

    "Do you want me to stay awake with you?".

    "No, it's fine. But I'll spend the night in my room this time, otherwise you won't get any sleep".

    "Alright. If you need anything don't hesitate to call me".

    "I will, don't worry".

    Aziraphale smiles and decides to eat on the couch to stay closer to Crowley. Anytime he would bump against his hand he would help by giving him some scratches.

    "I'm starting to think I should have scared someone into giving me scratches in these moments" he jokes.

    "I'm not sure you would be able to scare anyone when you're acting like this" Aziraphale laughs.

    "What? Why not?".

    "You're almost purring like a cat, it's actually adorable".

    "Adorable?! I'm not adorable!" Crowley says baffled by those accusations "And I'm not purring either. Now please continue".

    He bumps his head on Aziraphale's hand and he continues with a smile.

    "You really don't mind staying alone tonight?" Aziraphale says after finishing his tea.

    "No, it's fine. You should get some sleep".

    "Alright, I'll see you tomorrow then. Good night".

    "Night".

    Crowley watches him go and takes a deep breath before starting to wander again. He ends up going to his bedroom where he starts to make some good progress. He hasn't had problems with shedding in some decades. When he was younger things were different though. And so we're they this time.

    Aziraphale took a few minutes to fall asleep. It felt like something was missing. He would have slept well that night, there were no nightmares nor dreams, just peaceful rest. That is until his awakened by a loud thunder. He opens his eyes and his heart starts racing.

    "Where is Crowley?" he thinks as he jumps out of bed.

    The rain that had been drizzling for the last few days was now pouring. That combined with the thunders made it hard to hear but he called out for Crowley anyway. He immediately hears sounds coming from his room. He knocks at the door and continues to call for him but there is no answer. He can hear Crowley talking but can't quite understand what he's saying through the wall. He opens the door unprompted, ready to help, but what he sees isn't what he expected. Some of the glass bottles that were once on display were now broken on the floor. A flower pot had the same fate and spread dirt everywhere. But what worried Aziraphale the most was seeing Crowley scream as he rubbed his face against anything and everything in front of him.

    "Get out!" he shouts "Why are you stuck?!".

    He notices Crowley's body shifting in strange ways, almost like there was something inside of him wanting to come out, but anytime that happened he would grunt.

    "What's stuck?" Aziraphale asks getting closer, careful not to step on broken glass.

    "Who's there?" he asks unable to see anything but foggy shapes "Don't you dare get closer!".

    Aziraphale sees his eyes still pale and remembers something from that book with all the notes. It wasn't on a note, it was part of the official text, and it said something along the lines of "When shedding, the eye caps can get stuck. If they aren't manually removed, they can cause blindness and even infection".

    "It's me, Aziraphale, I know how to help you".

    "I said get back! I won't let you get any closer, you won't hurt me again!".

    Crowley's yells give Aziraphale chills. He can't see that it's him and he can't properly hear him either. The lightnings make him flinch but he doesn't stop moving.

    "Stop! You're going to hurt yourself" Aziraphale shouts as he gets closer "Let me help you, please".

    "Get away from me!".

    Aziraphale knew he could help Crowley, but talking to him wouldn't help. He can't stop the thunderstorm either and he fears Crowley will get hurt in the glass shards if he doesn't act now. He closes his fist and quickly accesses the situation. It's time to do something.

    He runs towards Crowley and tries to hold his face.

    "Give just one second, everything will be-".

    "DON'T FUCKING TOUCH ME!!" he hears Crowley screaming.

    Before he can manage to get a proper hold of him, he feels a sharp pain. No, that can't be. It can't be real. The whole world stops for a moment. He can feel Crowley's teeth deep in his hand. There's no time for a reaction, he's released just as fast as he was bitten in the first place. Aziraphale can't help but let out a scream but he looks back determined and worried. He has no time to waste. As a lighting flashes across the sky, he takes advantage of Crowley's distraction and holds his face against the floor. Tears start to stream down his face and tries to remove one of the eye caps. He feels Crowley starting to wrap himself around him and without hesitation, he pins him down with his elbow.

    "I'm sorry!" he yells right before he gets a hold of one of the stuck scales.

    He sees Crowley's shiny yellow eye underneath turning to him. As he struggles to get the second one he feels Crowley stop. There were no more screams and no more fighting back. Aziraphale finishes what he started and looks at Crowley panting.

    "I'm sorry, I couldn't think of any other way to help" he says.

    The only answer he got was a shocked look of terror.

    "Please tell me you're okay now. Please Crowley, say something, I'm begging you". Aziraphale's words get melted into his cries.

    "I bit you?" he mouths horrified "No no no... It wasn't you, I didn't see you".

    Crowley looks at his hand bleeding slowly. Behind it he can see his face, his closed eyes crying without any clue when to stop. Aziraphale reaches out to him with his hands shaking.

    "Please… I know you didn't want to. I'm sure you can see I'm not angry or scared. Just tell me if you're okay…".

    He looks at his eyes, they want to close. His words get dragged out until he can barely say anything.

    "No, no, no, please, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it".

    Aziraphale wobbles a little and Crowley catches him before he falls.

    "Crowley…" he stutters.

    "You'll be okay, I promise. I'll fix this, I'll fix everything".

    The tears stop running on Aziraphale's face as he loses consciousness, but they start rolling on Crowley's. He tries to hold onto him, to lift him off the floor but even if he's strong he's still a snake. He can't do it.

    "Come on" he grunts.

    He can't avoid but remember that nightmare. Everything looked too similar.

    "No, you'll be alright" he says with his heart beating loud "I'll take care of you".

    He focuses all his efforts and soon feels his skin burning with pain. He breathes between his teeth and holds Aziraphale with both arms. His cries were louder than the thunders. He didn't remember how bad it felt, but it is so much worse now than it was before. But Crowley's wishes to get Aziraphale the help he needs give him all the strength he could ask for. He carries his inanimate body to his own bed and transforms back out of breath. It isn't over. The lightning outside illuminates him as he gets what he needs.

    "You'll be okay, you'll be okay".

Author's note

    Here's chapter 17 of "The Serpent's carnations"! Very stressful moment, just when things seemed to be going well. What do you think will happen next with Crowley and Aziraphale? I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 18

    Aziraphale doesn't recall everything that happened that night. He could feel his body trembling but he only remembers seeing flashes of his room. He also remembers Crowley's voice repeating the same few words over and over again but he doesn't know what those words were. They sounded muffled and distant. He too felt distant, like his mind was moving away to somewhere else. Anytime he got closer he would feel this constant pain spreading and Crowley's voice would come back. He could feel him there close to him. But staying close to reality was difficult.

    "What if he's mad at me? What if he's not okay? Did I hurt him? Am I hurt too…?".

    He could feel tears rolling down his face but he couldn't wipe them away, he couldn't touch them. But he felt someone to it for him.

    "Crowley… Crowley, can you hear me?" he shouts.

    But the sound didn't go anywhere, it just echoed around him.

    "I need to get there".

    He tries once again, and once again he fails.

    "It's useless" he whispers "I don't even know what happened".

    Aziraphale stays back and contemplates his memories. After a few deep breaths, his mind starts to get clearer. Everything starts to slowly fall into place. He remembers waking up in the thunderstorm and looking for Crowley. The panic in his face at that moment was haunting. Everything happened so fast. Before he could even help him he was bitten.

    "Is that why I'm here?" Aziraphale questions.

    After that, he remembers holding down Crowley and then everything went quiet. The room started to spin around and before he could do anything else he collapsed. He can only recall short moments of what happened next. The thunders were still roaring, he heard a few. But that's not the only thing he heard. He remembers screams, they sounded like Crowley's. But the strangest part is that he could feel being lifted off the floor by someone. He didn't see anything but he could clearly feel two arms carrying him to his bed. The only other thing he could remember was feeling his hand in pain. It hurt but not like someone was actively hurting him, it felt like the bite was taken care of.

    "I have to go back…" he says determined "And there's no pain that will stop me".

    Crowley's heart couldn't physically beat faster. He cleaned Aziraphale's hand and wrapped it with bandages to stop the bleeding. He knows his venom isn't lethal but that doesn't mean it's harmless.

    "What were the symptoms? What was it, I knew this! Why can't I remember what matters?!" he bursts out in panic.

    All this had been documented but none of that existed anymore. But he knew all that information. How could he not know? It's his own venom, he should know everything it does. He hears Aziraphale struggling to breathe properly.

    "I remember that" he says trying to make space in his mind to remember "It was breathing, I have to keep attention to that. What was it that they did? I don't have any antidotes anymore. What else was there? I should turn him on his side, right? That feels correct".

    As he helps Azirahpale to lay on his side he feels him moving. He wasn't awake yet and his movements wouldn't be noticeable at a distance. They didn't seem to have a purpose, just erratic short motions. He can hear him grumbling something from between his teeth but no proper words were coming out.

    "It's okay, you're going to be okay. Do you hear me? You're going to be okay" Crowley cries.

    Aziraphale stops after a few minutes only to return to that state later. He continued to act like that, oscillating between actively responding to his afflictions and lying motionless on the bed. Both states terrified Crowley. He would make sure he was still breathing whenever he stopped moving. And when he started to move he made sure he didn't hurt himself. Anytime he felt Aziraphale could hear him, he reassured him.

    "You're going to be okay".

    Those few words were repeated countless times. They were an echo keeping Crowley away from being consumed by guilt. But he did everything he could think about, everything he remembered. He brought a damp towel to Aziraphale's forehead because he was sweating. He opened the top button of his shirt to help him breathe better. He changed the bandages on his hands until the bleeding stopped. He checked over and over again if there were no glass pieces hurting him. When the thunders were louder he hid under the bed apologizing for not being able to do more. But they passed eventually, there was just rain left. Crowley looks at Aziraphale, he has gotten progressively more quiet.

    "Is that normal?" he thinks "Does that mean he's getting better or worse?".

    He sees a tear rolling down his face, followed by a couple more.

    "I'm sorry" he says, gently drying his face "I'm so sorry...".

    He stays silent after that not knowing what else to do. The only option left was waiting so that's what he does. He looks at Aziraphale, too tired to notice how much time passed. But suddenly he sees him moving. This time it was different, he was slow and careful.

    "Crowley...?" he whispers as his eyes start to open.

    "I'm here, I'm right here" he answers anxiously "Tell me what hurts, I'll do my best to help. What do you need?".

    Aziraphale's eyes shift in the direction of his voice. A headache caused everything to be a little blurry, and the tears forming in his eyes didn't help him see clearer.

    The words "Are you okay?" tremble off his lips.

    "Am I okay?" Crowley repeats confused "Aziraphale, listen to me. You have to tell me how you're feeling so I can help you, do you understand that? Just tell me yes or no, alright? Are you nauseous?".

    "No".

    "Are you dizzy or lightheaded?".

    "Yes".

    "Does your head hurt?".

    "Yes".

    "Is it hard to breathe?".

    "No".

    "Are you feeling cold?".

    "Yes".

    "I'll grab you a blanket- Wait, do you think you have a fever?".

    Aziraphale found it hard to answer and he quickly stopped. He was trying to hold back his tears and if he spoke another word he knew it would all come crumbling down.

    "Please don't close your eyes again. Just tell me what's wrong. Can you tell me what's wrong? What do you need?".

    "I need-" he stops trying to hold back but it is too late "I need to know if you're okay".

    Aziraphale cries as he stares at Crowley who doesn't know how to answer.

    "You were screaming and- I don't know if I helped, I didn't mean to hold you like that, I promise I didn't. But I heard you screaming after that too, I don't know what happened".

    "Hey, look at me. I'm not hurt, okay? You don't have to worry about that, especially not now. You have to get better first, then we can talk about everything, alright?".

    He wipes his tears again and Aziraphale closes his eyes.

    "Take a deep breath if you can, it will help".

    Crowley gives him time to calm down. He was desperate to help but filling him with questions right away might not have been the best move.

    "I don't think I have a fever" Aziraphale says once he's able to speak again "I'm just a little cold".

    "Let me pull up the blanket for you. I don't have anything to help you with your headache. But I could make you some tea".

    "Maybe later if that's okay".

    "Of course. Is there anything else that's wrong?".

    "Nothing unexpected".

    "I-" Crowley stops mid-sentence to gather his words "I know I said we will talk later when things are better but I just want you to know that I'm sorry. I would never hurt you, I wasn't thinking straight".

    "I know you didn't mean to. I don't know what happened to make you act like that but I could tell there was something wrong".

    "I'll do my best to explain it when you're feeling better".

    "Thank you, Crowley".

    "Do you mind if I take a look at your hand?".

    "Here, just tell me if I need to do anything".

    Aziraphale watches Crowley carefully remove the bandages on his hand. He hasn't seen the bite yet, he caught a glimpse of it when it happened but that wasn't his focus at the moment. But when he finally sees it his gaze moves away hesitantly.

    "Sorry, I should have warned you. There's no need for you to look if you don't want to".

    "Is it bad or is everything normal?".

    "It's as good as it could be at the moment. Which isn't particularly good but it will get better. I just need to clean your hand before covering it again. I'll try my best so that it doesn't hurt".

    "It's alright, I'm sure the worst part is over".

    "I hope so. I need to get water, I'll be right back".

    Crowley didn't take long to return and get started. He soaks a small cloth and gently takes it to Aziraphale's hand. He could feel the fresh water on his skin and even if it hurt, it wasn't unbearable. He lifts his eyes to Crowley who is completely absorbed by his current task.

    "Good news is that the bleeding is under control. It's no reason not to be careful but it's good. I just need to give you some new bandages".

    "Thank you, Crowley".

    He stops for a second and his voice gets lower.

    "Don't thank me, this isn't even the bare minimum you should have right now".

    "What is then?".

    "You need real care from people who actually know what they're doing. But I can't take you and I can't bring anyone here either. And as if that wasn't bad enough, I'm the one that caused this. How can I ever make up for that?" he asks looking back at Aziraphale "So no, this is not the bare minimum".

    "I know you're doing your best".

    "If this is my best then what am I good for?!" Crowley shouts.

    Their teary eyes lock with each other.

    "You almost made me believe that I can be good at something" he whispers "But look at what I did to you".

    "You know I'm not mad at you".

    "Why? Why are you not mad? Or angry? Or afraid? How can you look at me without a single drop of hate?".

    "Why do you want me to be so upset at you?".

    "Because I hurt you! I hurt you and you're acting like it's not a big deal".

    Aziraphale stares at him with a serious expression and sits up on the bed.

    "Do you want me to be angry? Fine. I know you're feeling guilty and you did hurt me yesterday. But I knew what I was doing, I knew the risk I was taking. I'm not stupid just because you don't scare me. But I couldn't leave you there suffering".

    "You shouldn't-".

    "I shouldn't what? I wasn't going to turn my back on you. You can argue that maybe there was a better approach, maybe I could have thought of something else. But I knew what had to be done and every second I took to think was another agonizing second for you. If you saw me screaming in a terrifying situation, would you leave me there to hurt myself? I don't think you would, and neither did I. So I acted fast. I knew I could do it. I apologize for-" Aziraphale's eyebrows turn with sadness before he can finish his sentence.

    Crowley listens to every harsh word being said. They were hard to hear but they weren't lying. The only thing he can do is stare at him. His eyes barely holding his tears, like a kid getting yelled at by their parents.

    "I apologize for hurting you or making you feel scared or worried or guilty. But I hope you can understand why I did it. You deserve help too. I don't know who made you think you aren't good for anything, but they were wrong and cruel. You can be so kind and sweet and caring, all you need is to feel safe. And it makes me happy that you feel safe to act that way around me. I feel safe with you too. So please, don't let this consume you. I understand if you feel bad for what happened, I do too, but don't let the guilt take control. I'm here for you".

    Crowley can only voice a shaken "I'm sorry".

    They both stay quiet, fearing the damage their next words could cause. Aziraphale looks at him and gets off the bed, kneeling on the floor.

    "You shouldn't leave your bed".

    "I'll get back soon. I just- I'm sorry. It felt wrong to apologize while looking down at you. And you deserve a proper apology".

    He takes a deep breath and looks Crowley in the eyes.

    "I'm sorry for what I did yesterday. I probably made you feel even worse than you already were. We both know that wasn't my intention but that is what happened. I'm really sorry for that and for what I said just now. I shouldn't speak to you like that, it was insensitive. It won't happen-".

    Before he can finish his sentence, Crowley moves fast and hugs him. Aziraphale hugs him back and hears him whispering "I'm sorry" repeatedly.

    Aziraphale is lying in bed again. He closes his eyes for a second and listens to the rain outside.

    "I have your tea here" he hears after a few minutes "But I can bring it back later if you want to sleep".

    "Thank you Crowley" he answers with a smile "I just need a couple of minutes, but I'll drink it soon".

    "You're feeling worse aren't you?".

    "I'm sure it's nothing".

    "It's probably the adrenaline fading away. You should get some rest".

    "I will. But can you stay here with me?".

    "I had no intention of leaving, I need to make sure you're doing okay".

    "Thank you Crowley. But I also thought that this could be a good moment for talking about what happened. I know it might be a difficult conversation but it won't get easier if we put it off".

    Crowley takes a moment to think before answering.

    "I know we have to talk. But can you wait just a few more minutes? I just- I need to think about what I'm going to say".

    "Of course dear. Come here" Aziraphale pats on the bed next to him "You can think while I rest, and then after I drink my tea we can talk. How does that sound?".

    "Sounds good".

    Crowley slithers next to the bed and takes a deep breath. He starts to go over some thoughts and memories but is soon pulled back to reality when he notices Aziraphale looking at him.

    "Why are you staring at me?".

    "Nothing, it's nothing".

    "Doesn't look like nothing".

    "I'm just glad that things worked out earlier. It wasn't done in the best way, I would change some of my words if I could, but taking into consideration what happened I think we did our best. I was afraid you wouldn't want to talk to me anymore but you're still by my side. Things aren't perfect, but I believe they're fixable… Right?".

    "I'm not sure" Crowley says "I don't know if I can forgive myself. I don't know if you're safe here. I thought you were but how can I trust that I won't attack you again?".

    "You need time to heal, that's all. But I hope you can forgive yourself one day".

    "That's easy for you to say, you practically forgave me before I even apologized. I'm not used to it. I didn't know forgiveness could be given so gracefully".

    "Can I ask you something?".

    Crowley nods and shifts his gaze to Aziraphale.

    "Are you mad at me?".

    "No, not really. I'm just worried".

    "There you go then".

    "There you go what? What are you talking about?".

    "I may be wrong with my assumption but maybe you've forgiven me?".

    They lock eyes and Crowley frowns as he thinks of a way to deny that accusation. He can't. He still doesn't like the fact that Aziraphale put himself in danger, but he isn't mad or upset. If there was something to be forgiven then it already was.

    "Well, it's easier to forgive someone when they give a good apology. At least yours had more than two words".

    "Having a long apology doesn't make it good. A short apology can be more honest in a lot of cases".

    "I still think I should've said more".

    "If it eases your mind, I'm not completely pleased with my apology either".

    Aziraphale closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.

    "What if we redid it?" Crowley suggests apprehensive "You know, say what we would like to have said in the first place".

    "That doesn't sound like a bad idea actually. An official apology of some sort".

    Aziraphale sits up on the bed and Crowley lifts his head.

    "Should I go first?" he asks.

    "I proposed this so you can decide".

    "If that's the case, I will go first".

    He straightens his back and takes a short moment to gather his thoughts. After a deep breath, he looks at Crowley's eyes and speaks.

    "I am deeply sorry for what happened. It was a desperate moment but it doesn't mean that I'm exempt from guilt. I jumped into a situation and put us both in danger. I will be more careful from now on and I'll do my best not to let things get that far. I promise".

    Aziraphale gives Crowley a soft smile after he finishes. He patiently waits for him to find his words.

    "I'm sorry for what I did yesterday. I allowed a personal problem to lead me to harm you. You were trying to help me and got hurt in the process because of me. Whether I deserved your help or not is not important, the result is still the same. But I will put all my efforts into making it up for you. I will help you get better and I'll get better myself. I don't want this to ever happen again".

    They look at each other quietly for a moment and Aziraphale can't resist hugging Crowley.

    "Well, do you forgive me?".

    "I do. Do you forgive me?".

    "I do" Aziraphale says with a smile "But I think there's an apology left".

    "What?".

    "I think you should apologize to yourself. It doesn't have to be now and you don't even have to say it out loud. But you said it was easier to forgive when there's a good apology, so maybe that would help".

    Crowley holds him closer and closes his eyes.

    "Maybe I'll try".

Author's note

    Here's chapter 18 of "The Serpent's carnations"! It's a little longer to make up for all the stress and trauma. But what is a fanfic without at least a little bit of drama right? Well, they seem to be talking at least so that's nice! What do you think of their apologies? And a side note, Aziraphale's face gave me a hard time drawing in this perspective. But I think it turned out alright in the end! I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 19

    Quick warning: some moments in this chapter contain descriptions of violent acts. Just like in some previous ones, the descriptions aren’t too detailed. Violence won't be a predominant part of the story, but it is present in a few moments (without spoiling the story, I can guarantee there won't be many more chapters with this content). Because of that, I don’t think it would be worth marking the AO3 warning for the whole story. I promise that there will be many more wholesome moments!! But proceed with caution if these themes affect you. I’ll let you go back to reading now! Hope you like it!

    "Thank you again for the tea" Aziraphale says putting down the empty teacup.

    "Did it help?".

    "Yes, tea always makes me feel better".

    "And you still want to talk about what happened? I really don't want to bring down your good mood".

    "I'm sure it won't be a light conversation, but isn't it better to do it when we're both feeling calm?".

    "I guess you're right".

    "I can start if that would make it easier".

    "Please do".

    "Alright, let's see...".

    Aziraphale takes a moment to think. There was a lot he wanted to talk about but he was unsure which question was the priority. None of them are particularly nice so asking them all at once will hit Crowley too strongly. But how can he possibly pick one?

    "I have a few questions but maybe asking them without context will be confusing. So I think I would like to take you through my train of thought, is that alright?".

    Crowley nods and rests his head on Aziraphale's legs.

    "It starts with that book…" he mentions nervously.

    There is no apparent reaction from Crowley so he continues.

    "The notes talked about a snake but it seems like they weren't always a snake. You're the only snake I know and the book was yours so I assumed it was referring to you. And yesterday after all the chaos I felt someone hold me. I couldn't see anything but I felt two arms around me. It could have been someone else, I'm not sure who it would be or why they would be here carrying me. But I vividly remember hearing your voice too. I don't know what it means, perhaps it was just a dream. But it felt real and I did wake up in my bed. I'm not sure if I'm making up stories in my mind. Still, everything seems to be connected to you".

    Crowley’s heart starts to feel tight.

    "Those fucking books" he whispers.

    "I'm sorry for bringing them back up, but I thought it was relevant".

    "You don't have to apologize, they are relevant. If they were irrelevant I wouldn't need to get rid of them".

    Crowley feels Aziraphale's hand trying to comfort him. He doesn't want to tell him but there are no other options now. He looks at Aziraphale nervous to start talking.

    "It's alright" he says with a soft reassuring smile "You can talk to me, nothing bad will happen".

    Crowley looks down and leans closer to his hand.

    "Do you remember that kid that wrote some of the notes?".

    "Yes, I remember".

    "You asked if I knew what happened to him. I do. And I think it's time you know too".

    Crowley takes a deep breath and starts to reveal the story of that kid. A little over 40 years ago, this boy had just turned 10. He was born into a wealthy family of doctors. Sometimes there would be unknown people in his house looking for help. Other times, his parents would visit the sick and injured. To his childish eyes, they were doing selfless acts of compassion towards those who needed them.

    "To a kid like him, that's what it looked like" Crowley adds.

    His parents taught him how to read, write, and about different sciences. He particularly loved to learn about the stars. He would even stay up late to look at them. Besides his classes, his parents didn't share many moments with him.

    "They're helping people" he thought as he was left alone.

    He would stay in this room looking at his favorite books and curling his already curly hair with the tip of his finger. Sometimes he would also wander off to town, always taking some money with him to buy sweets.

    "The lady at the pastry shop already knew him. She even knew his favorite desserts and always had him try new recipes" Crowley says getting lost in the story for a second.

    Aziraphale notices a soft smile momentarily appear on his face. It was one of the only moments in that story that could be remotely happy. Crowley notices his distraction and quickly retraces his tracks back to the story. He feels that short smile weighing on him. How could he smile knowing what happened? Even if it's been decades, his heart still aches for that kid. He had no idea everything would falter right before his eyes. One of those days, he had just bought some pastries when he heard crying. It was coming from an alley close by. As he got near he saw another kid. She was sitting on the floor crying.

    "Are you okay?" he asked worried.

    She didn't answer.

    "Did something happen? Are you hungry?".

    "It's my mom" she cried without lifting her head "She was sick and didn't want me next to her so that I didn't get sick too".

    "I think I know who can help" he said filled with hope, his parents are doctors after all.

    "No one can now. She passed away this morning".

    His worried smile dissipated faster than he could process that sentence. She was right, there was nothing anyone could do.

    "Here, you can have this. I just bought it, it usually makes me feel better".

    She looked up and got up from the floor. He thought she would grab his pastry but when he least expected she punched him in the face.

    "What-" before he could voice his surprise she pushed him to the ground.

    "Wait!" he said scared "What are you doing?".

    "Your parents killed my mom!" she screamed.

    His eyes filled with tears as she held him down.

    "She was distraught" Crowley describes "His parents were the doctors but they didn't help her mother get better. She didn't have the money to pay for the treatment. And now she had left her daughter alone".

    But she wasn't just a kid, there was something different about her. No one knew her secret, not even herself. Filled with rage and grief she held him down.

    "You're monsters! You're all monsters!".

    He tried to free himself from her grasp but it was impossible. Her voice distorted slowly and her eyes almost seemed to shine.

    "You're a monster just like your parents but unlike them, you won't fool anyone, I won't let you. The hate of the people you encounter will reveal your true nature. You don't deserve to hide. I'll make sure everyone knows what you are. Even if it's the last thing I do".

    He closed his eyes anticipating some sort of attack. To his surprise, he didn't feel anything hit him. But he did feel something. There was no one holding him anymore. He opened his eyes and that girl wasn't anywhere to be seen. She had just dissipated into thin air. His heart was pounding on his chest. The only thing he managed to do was to run home. He stormed into the house and ran to his parents. They had a client present but he was leaving already. He was about to get scolded for interrupting their business but once he looked up his parents took a step back. His eyes weren't brown anymore. They were yellow and had a thin slit pupil.

    "He got cursed that day" Crowley says "I got cursed".

    Aziraphale could feel his heart racing. He had his suspicions about Crowley, but knowing the truth is a completely different thing. But if he’s truly the one mentioned in those notes then this story will continue to swerve away from any hope of a happy ending. He remembers all those notes. He was the kid who liked the stars. The one who wanted a telescope and never got one. How could his own parents write those cruel notes?

    "Crowley?" he asks with his voice trembling.

    "Hm?" he responds looking at him.

    Crowley was almost numb telling that story. His tone was serious, he was holding back most of his emotions. It was easier to avoid them if he wanted to get through the events. He's surprised to see Aziraphale's teary eyes looking at him.

    "Are you alright?" Crowley asks worried.

    "I'm- Yes, I'm alright" he stutters "I was going to ask you the same thing".

    "Maybe you should lay down".

    Aziraphale does what Crowley says and lays in bed. His head still hurts but it gets better as soon as he rests it on the soft pillow.

    "Sorry, I shouldn't have interrupted".

    "It's okay. I know it's a lot to take in".

    "You didn't answer me, are you alright?".

    "I am as good as I can be. I'm sure you have a lot of questions".

    "I do, but I don't need to ask them now".

    "I'll let you ask everything once it's over. I don't promise I'll answer them all, but I'll try".

    "Thank you, I'll be mindful of what to ask. And I'm sorry for what you went through, I can't even imagine how hard it was. But I'm assuming things get worse?".

    "They do. It happened decades ago and I still can't find the strength to process most of it. They're just like nightmares. Haunted memories… I don't want you to hear this if you're not ready".

    "You don't have to worry about how I react. Just don't push yourself past your limits. You can stop at any time. But know that I can handle it. I'm here to listen. I'm here for you".

    Crowley slithers into his arms and Aziraphale gently hugs him.

    "Are you sure you want me to keep going?".

    "I'm sure".

    He takes a deep breath and gets ready to dive into the worst years of his life.

    After the curse, his eyes were changed permanently. His parents got immediately worried, he knew it. He could feel their worries, their love, their annoyance. He could feel everything. It was confusing. All these colors came out of nowhere flooding his brain. They were labeled with different people and each of them was unique and new. It would take him a good time to learn how they work, he didn't have time to sit down and think. His parents took a good look at him but nothing appeared odd besides the eyes. But Crowley felt different, as if there was something new he could do. He was too scared to try it so he tried to avoid it. If he wasn't so curious, maybe it would have taken longer. That same night he couldn't sleep. So in the boredom of the night, he found himself transforming. He called for his parents who came running. They helped him calm down and transform back.

    "That's when they set a rule" Crowley said "I shouldn't transform unless they stated otherwise".

    They also made him wear sunglasses anytime he was around other people. His parents started to document everything, that's what they tended to do. He thought it was because they were worried, they seemed desperate sometimes. And perhaps that was the case in the beginning, they wanted to find a solution. But that was not a disease, there's no cure. And soon their concerns turned into morbid curiosity.

    "They had endless notes about everything I did. But being a spectator wasn't enough for them. So they started to make tests".

    Crowley tries not to fall too deep into those memories, but it is hard not to remember. Most tests were repetitive. A lot of them were painful. He keeps it vague as he tells Aziraphale, he doesn't need to know the details.

    As time passed, Crowley noticed something. Those imaginary colors were changing slowly when it came to his parents, but to other people, it wasn't as smooth. Anytime anyone would see his eyes or his transformed self, there would be an abrupt change in those colors. Not only that, but he could feel his body changing too. He started to realize what those meant and how they affected him. Just like the curse said, the hate will reveal his true nature. His humanity started to slip through his fingers and so did his ability to transform.

    "My parents didn't like that" he shares with some pain in his voice "They wanted me to always be in my human form. But sunglasses weren't enough to hide me anymore".

    His canine teeth became pointier and there were some scales around his body that he couldn't change back. But he kept thinking positively, hoping for a change. He sat by his window every night looking at the sky, waiting for a shooting star to grant him a wish. He never saw one, but all the lights up there gave him a sense of peace. He didn't like it when there were clouds in the sky, they blocked his view. But he knew the stars would always be there for him. Until the day that they weren't. He was a few months away from turning 14. After a few rainy days, he finally got to take a clear look at the sky. It was empty. He had noticed some changes in his vision but he didn't think it would affect the stars. The curse took away the only thing keeping him company and there was nothing he could do about it. That moment changed him. He started to fight back at his parents but they didn't care about him "throwing a fit". They continued the tests and even did some experiments. They wanted to know more about him, but not in the way a parent should. And one day, they found a use for him. His venom. They could use it as a medication, an analgesic to be precise. The tests slowed down, all they needed from him was the venom. They stopped caring if he was in his human form, they didn't need that. But Crowley didn't want to lose his body. He begged them for help, for love, but it was useless.

    "I could feel their love disappearing. And my humanity went away with it".

    He remembers not being able to fully transform. There would be fingers missing, replaced by snake scales. The curse would take away more and more each time. His arms, his face, everything. Even when he did his best to transform he looked like a monster. How could he make someone love him when he looked like that? He was no longer allowed to roam freely, not even inside his house.

    "I started to fight when they took my venom so I was put in a cage".

    He lived in there for a few years. They had to replace it quite often as he would constantly break it. By the time he turned eighteen, he was stuck as a snake. He couldn't transform a single molecule of his body.

    "At that moment I knew for a fact that there was no one in the world who loved me in any way".

    Aziraphale leans on him and he leans back taking a deep breath. There was nothing he could do besides giving them a hard time. So that's what he did. He wasted his venom in anything he could sink his teeth in. In his food, in his parents, and even in himself. They took more drastic measures as they were getting low in their precious supply. He was only fed after giving them the venom. Good for him, he could go a couple of weeks without eating. When it didn't work, they took a different approach. They kept him cold. He could barely stay awake. He felt defeated. There was nothing he could do. But he noticed that his parents started to be more careless around him. So he made a plan.

    Around his twentieth birthday, he acted more sleepy than he was and managed to bite his father when he got closer. He took the cage’s key from him and freed himself right before his mother interfered.

    "I'm not sure about what happened next, it was too fast. But when I came to my senses both my parents were dead. I don't know where that strength came from but it was all I had left in me. I think a part of me hoped that if they died the curse would be lifted. That was not the case".

    Crowley stays quiet for a moment, he still remembers their faces. That moment is made of noise, he will never remember it precisely, and neither does he want to, but he will always remember what they did to him.

    "I… burned them" Crowley whispers "I couldn't feel their hate anymore. I felt... relieved".

    His feelings start to catch up to him. He held them back for as long as he could, but he couldn't help it anymore. It's the first time he's talked about what happened. Saying those words out loud was different than remembering them. He looks at Aziraphale and he's looking back at him. He can't say another word.

    "Come here" Aziraphale says tenderly "You need a proper hug".

    He gets closer and feels Aziraphale's arms around him.

    "Let's take a break alright? You can talk more about it later".

    "But I didn't even get to the important part, I didn't explain to you what happened" Crowley cries.

    "I'm in no rush, we have time. You don't have to tell your story as an explanation. It's your story. You have feelings about it. You don't have to push them aside".

    He holds back for a moment but Aziraphale's words bring down his walls. He hugs him back and apologizes.

    "You don't have to apologize, you did nothing wrong" Aziraphale reassures him.

    Crowley could sense so many levels of kind emotions coming from him. It's hard for him to understand why, maybe they're both crazy. But he feels safe in his embrace.

    All he can say is a faded "Thank you".

    "You're welcome, dear".

Author's note

    Here's chapter 19 of "The Serpent's carnations"! And it's Crowley's backstory time again! I hope I did a good job telling his story, but there's still some left to share. Is this what you expected? I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 20

    The rain was still going strong outside but the thunders had been gone for long enough to be forgotten. Aziraphale's arms were still embracing Crowley. He stays quiet but his heart is beating fast. It's hard to believe everything he just heard. Not because he doesn't trust Crowley to tell the truth, but because he doesn't want to believe people would choose to behave in such a harmful way. He was just a kid, he didn't deserve to be cursed for his parent's wrongdoing. And all these years later, he still suffers the consequences of someone else's mistakes. Aziraphale can feel him moving. He's almost desperately wrapping himself around him, trying to hug him back. But he's afraid and starts moving away.

    "It's alright" Aziraphale whispers "You won't hurt me".

    "The last time I thought about them I did hurt you. I don't want it to happen again".

    "I understand" he exhales with a soft smile on his lips.

    "Please don't let go of me" Crowley responds quickly, nervously, "I just need a minute".

    "I'll hold you for as long as you want".

    "You can ask some questions if you want".

    "Oh, dear, those have time".

    Crowley didn't want to answer his questions at that moment but he didn't want to stay in the silence. His mind would spiral faster in the silence. He needed to hear Aziraphale's voice.

    "Please- Just talk to me" he asks pushing the words out of his mouth "Anything, anything will do".

    Aziraphale hears the despair coming from Crowley and searches his mind for something to talk about.

    "I'm sorry dear, it's hard to find something to talk about out of nowhere. I guess I could tell you a story?".

    "Mhm" Crowley whimpers.

    "Let me see... Oh, I know. There was a book I read last year about this cat...".

    Aziraphale goes on to share the story of how he almost got a cat because of a book. Crowley asks a couple of questions but keeps to himself for the most part. He listens to every word and feels his heartbeat slowing down to its normal rate. Just a few hours ago his actions were controlled by fear, but now all that chaos had faded. He could feel the warmth of Aziraphale’s body. His words brought him a peace he didn't know he could reach at that moment. He didn't want it to end.

    "So I decided not to adopt a cat. I didn't want him alone at the house all day, and the library isn't a safe space to bring a cat. We tend not to allow animals in there because of allergies".

    Aziraphale hears him take a deep breath after he finishes the story.

    "I thought you said I could go there" Crowley observes, teasing him.

    "Well, you aren't covered in hair so I don't think you would cause allergies. And besides that, you would be there with me. I'm not one to do it often, but an exception seems acceptable in this case".

    Crowley smiles. He's sure allergies wouldn't be the main concern of the library clients regarding him. It's not like he's going anywhere, but knowing that he's welcome in Aziraphale's library fills his heart with joy.

    "Are you feeling better?".

    "I am" Crowley says snuggling closer "Thank you".

    "You're welcome dear".

    "And what about you, are you feeling alright?".

    "Yes, maybe a little peckish".

    "Would you like anything in specific?".

    "No, I don't think so".

    "I'll fix you something, it won't take long".

    "Thank you dear" he answers with a smile.

    Crowley slithers out of the bed leaving Aziraphale alone. The room grows silent, he can hear his heart beating fast. He stares at his bandaged hand. It hurt a little but he rather not focus on that. His headache was faint, at least now that he was lying down. But he wants to get up. Aziraphale's tired of staying in bed, especially now that he has nothing to do.

    "It should be alright" he says sitting on the edge of the bed "It's not like I'll be running a marathon. I just need to get to the couch".

    He gets up from the bed and holds onto the wall as a precaution.

    "This is ridiculous" he thinks "Why am I scared of walking now? I feel perfectly capable".

    But something inside him was warning him to be careful.

    He slowly walks out of his room and through the hallway until reaching the living room.

    "What are you doing out of bed?!" he hears.

    "Hello" Aziraphale answers with a smile "I just needed to stretch my legs. But I'm fine, see?".

    "You're going to fall and hit your head" Crowley continues concerned.

    "Don't worry, I'm not going to".

    Aziraphale walks slowly to the couch and Crowley slithers close to him to try and help. He couldn't do much, but staying away as he wobbled around didn't sound like the best idea. Aziraphale flops on the couch and takes a deep breath.

    "See, there was nothing to worry about" he says feeling everything move around again.

    "One day your stubbornness won't be on the same side as your luck" Crowley responds frustrated.

    "Oh, what could have gone wrong?".

    "Maybe your food burned while I was making sure you didn't hurt yourself".

    Aziraphale's face is suddenly filled with concern. Crowley sighs and slithers to the kitchen again.

    "Stay there alright?".

    He wasn't planning on distracting Crowley anymore. Not until his food was safe and sound. He leans back and closes his eyes. The scent of warm toasted bread reaches his nose after a few minutes. He opens his eyes and tries to take a peek at the kitchen. There isn't much he could see but soon Crowley appears.

    "You were lucky this time".

    "Thank you, dear. And I'm sorry".

    "It's alright, it's hard to stay in the same room for too long. But you need to be careful alright? I don't remember everything about the effects but I know it's better to be safe than sorry".

    Aziraphale scootches to the side to make space for Crowley. They take in that short untroubled moment. There's still a lot to be said and uncovered. But at least there are a few peaceful minutes to allow their hearts to rest.

    "That's much better" Aziraphale comments.

    Crowley lifts his head to look at him a bit nervous.

    "Do you want me to light the fireplace?".

    "You can if you'd like, but I'm good with this blanket. Are you feeling cold?".

    "No, I'm fine".

    Aziraphale puts his hands on Crowley's face.

    "Are you nervous?".

    "Why would I be nervous?" he scoffs.

    Aziraphale's eyebrow raises as he waits for an honest answer.

    "Fine. I am nervous. Happy?".

    "Is it because of what you already told me or because of what's left to tell?".

    "Both. You know the worst parts now and yet you still don't know the more relevant pieces of information. And with every word that I say, I'm afraid that you'll change how you see me".

    "I think change is unavoidable. But it doesn't mean it's a bad thing. I learn more about you every day. It's like looking at puzzle pieces. I know it's you I'm looking at, but with every new day, I see you clearer. And, as long as you allow me to, I'll eventually see you. The real you. With all your grumpy and kind sides".

    "You're the strangest person I ever met, you know that?".

    "Is that bad?".

    "Not in the slightest".

    They're both lying on the couch. Aziraphale finished eating a few minutes ago and Crowley is now resting on top of him like a weighted blanket. His eyes are closed but he can feel Aziraphale's hands stroking his forehead.

    "I didn't get to tell you, but since your skin shedded, your scales look extra shiny".

    "Thank you. That's actually something I would like to talk to you about" he responds opening his eyes.

    "Your beautiful shining scales?".

    "What? No, why would I- I'm talking about the shedding".

    "Oh. That makes more sense. Go on then".

    "I started to shed my skin not long after I got cursed. And it truly doesn't hurt for snakes, not typically at least. But it would be painful to follow my parents' rule to stay human".

    Crowley still remembers his first shed. It felt like his skin was set on fire. Even after his shedding was over, it still took a couple of weeks for him to fully recover. He tried to keep hidden, to leave his skin covered in scales as much as he could, but there wasn't much he could do. It was the only thing that improved as he lost his ability to transform. It didn't hurt as much, but he would always struggle with his eyes. Just like he did this time. It all stopped when he was completely stuck as a snake, he could shed normally without any help.

    "When I started to struggle, it brought me back. I swear I didn't know it was you. I thought it was my mother. That's why I bit you. It is no excuse, but it is something you should know. I didn't think this would ever happen again. I haven't had problems in so many years. But this time it was different. I-" he looks at Aziraphale and takes a deep breath "You know how I can sense fear?".

    He nods.

    "It's not just fear I can sense. I know what everyone feels towards me. Good or bad. And since you got here I could pick up on your feelings too. They changed with time, and I started to change too".

    Crowley stops to think carefully about his next words.

    "I don't mean to intrude, it's none of my business. But I can feel that you care for me".

    He stays quiet for a couple of seconds nervous about Aziraphale's reaction. He lets out a nervous laugh and brings one hand to his face.

    "I'm sorry, I'm sorry" he says "Oh dear, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to laugh. It's not funny".

    He glances at Crowley who's looking back at him.

    "I'm sorry if this is a stupid question. Is your extra sense the only way you found out that I... care for you?".

    Crowley's eyes open wide for a second before turning serious, making Aziraphale feel both embarrassed and guilty. He rests his head on his chest.

    "People lie, Aziraphale" he grumbles "They pretend to be who they aren't all the time. They tried to trick me. Poison me. Sneak into my life to hurt me. And the only reason it never worked is because I saw the truth. Even if I don't want to sense anything, it's beyond my control. I wish I could turn it on and off as I please but I can't. So I'll use it, I'll make sure I'm safe".

    "I know Crowley, I'm sorry. I can't judge you for protecting yourself. Especially not after everything you've been through. I'm sorry".

    "I know you didn't laugh at me. And to answer your question, I don't know. I... had never met anyone like you. I don't think I would have allowed you to get this close. I'm sorry if that's not the answer you were expecting. You're very... kind to me. But if I trusted any 'nice' person I met I wouldn't be here now".

    "I understand. I have a bad tendency to trust people. I can't say it always works out. But I'm glad I can trust you".

    "How can you be sure I'm trustworthy?" he asks looking at him.

    "I'm not. No one can be sure. It's a choice. And I think I chose right when it comes to you".

    Crowley leans closer to Aziraphale, who holds him close.

    "I believe you were trying to get somewhere with this?".

    "I was. It's hard to keep on track sometimes".

    "That's alright dear. I won't interrupt anymore, I promise".

    Crowley takes a deep breath. He could dance around the topic but it doesn't matter. He'll have to say it. So why prolong his wait?

    "I recently found out I can turn human again. And it's because of you" he says with a raspy voice "I didn't want to tell you. I don't want you to feel burdened. But somehow, the way you feel is enough to bring back my humanity. I'm sorry... I can't even show you".

    He feels Aziraphale's heart beating fast.

    "You can ask your questions now" he says trembling his voice "I don't think I have anything else to say".

    "How many questions can I ask?".

    "As many as you want".

    Aziraphale takes a moment to think. There are a lot of questions he would like to ask, but he won't ask all of them. They're both tired, especially Crowley. He has been exhausting his last energies, he didn't get any sleep that night.

    "Was it you that carried me to bed last night?".

    "Yes, it was me".

    "I'm assuming it hurt and that's why you can't do it again for now".

    "That's right".

    "Did you... miss it?".

    "It isn't going to fix anything. It honestly only makes me more scared. But I would be lying if I said I didn't miss it".

    "Why didn't you want to tell me?".

    "I thought that if you knew you'd change and I would be stuck as a snake again".

    "Why would I change?".

    "You've gotten close to me by your own will. If I told you're the only reason I can have my body back your motives might change. I don't think you would change abruptly, but you may have felt some pressure to stay here. And that would only lead you to resent me. I'd rather leave it up to destiny and let you go. You deserve to be happy in your library, I know you love it there. And if you were going to forget me then at least it wouldn't be my fault".

    "I see. It must have been hard to carry all that alone. But I promise you'll always have a place in my heart. I don't want you to go through the same loss again, and I don't want to lose you either. You're my friend".

    Crowley looks him in the eyes and Aziraphale smiles softly.

    "I'm your friend?".

    "Of course you are dear".

    "Are you my friend too?".

    "I would think I am, but you're the one who decides".

    Aziraphale feels Crowley get closer again.

    "You're my friend" he whispers in his ear.

    Aziraphale smiles and turns to his side.

    "Let's get some rest, alright?".

    "Mhm" Crowley mumbles "You need to rest".

    "I will".

    Crowley closes his eyes and Aziraphale gently strokes his forehead. He watches as he falls asleep and his smile slowly fades. Knowing what Crowley went through makes him want to hold him, maybe that would make everything okay. But he can't alter the past. Looking at him so sound asleep seems like an illusion. How could he? He looks so peaceful. Is that what happens?

    "I guess the only option is to live with it" Aziraphale thinks "Or... not...".

    He feels his heart aching and his eyes fill with tears. But now he's here. Crowley doesn't need to be alone.

    "I'll make sure you're safe" he whispers and hugs him tighter "I won't let any more harm come your way".

    When Crowley woke up, the rain had stopped but it was dark outside. It was a cloudy night. He glances at Aziraphale. He's deep in his sleep but still holding onto Crowley. He looks at his hand. It would probably be a good idea to change the bandages but he doesn't want to wake him. A few more hours won't be a problem. While he waits he can't help but think of Aziraphale's words. His feelings have been in constant change since he arrived at that house, but lately, they're confined to a warm variety of colors. They're still evolving, gradually getting stronger, and even after the latest events, they haven't shattered. Crowley can't understand it. He doesn't know how Aziraphale manages to live like this. Always putting trust in others. Always smiling. Always being kind. Has it always worked out for him? He said it hasn't. People take advantage of anyone they can. And his compassion could make him an easy target. But why does he keep on doing it?

    "You aren't even afraid of the consequences" Crowley thinks.

    He keeps glancing at him, wondering what stories he has lived through. Times flies by and Aziraphale starts to wake up. Even before opening his eyes, the first thing he does is instinctively hug Crowley.

    "Did you sleep well?" he asks but the only answer he gets is a couple of mumbling sounds.

    He sees a smile forming on Aziraphale's face. That's probably a yes.

    "I know it's still nighttime, and you probably could use a few more hours of sleep, but I think I should check in on your hand".

    "Alright" he whispers but doesn't move.

    Crowley waits for a few seconds before nudging his head on Aziraphale's face.

    "I'll need you to let me go get some stuff alright?".

    He rubs his eyes before opening them and looks at Crowley.

    "What did you say dear? I don't think I heard you".

    "I need to take care of your hand. So I need you to let me go for a moment".

    "Oh" he says blushing "I'm sorry".

    Crowley slithers out of the couch and when he returns he sees Aziraphale wrapped in the blanket.

    "Are you cold?".

    "A little now".

    "I'll light up the fireplace and make you some tea".

    Aziraphale follows Crowley with his eyes as he moves around. The room starts to feel cozier right after the fire is burning. He takes care of his hand just like he did before. After the new bandages are in place he gets Aziraphale his tea.

    "Why are you looking at me like that?" Crowley asks.

    "Oh, it's nothing" he responds looking down at the tea cup.

    Crowley slithers next to him and rests his head on Aziraphale's lap.

    "Are you feeling better now?".

    "I am" he says resting his hands on Crowley "Thank you".

Author's note

    Here's chapter 20 of "The Serpent's carnations"! I can't believe we're at the 20-chapter mark already! I'm so happy, and I'm glad for all of you who have been here with me during all this. But anyway, Crowley spilled the tea now, the truth is out. What do you think will happen now that Aziraphale knows? And just wanted to let you know that I'm starting a full-time job soon so chapters may take 2 weeks instead of 1 to be posted. I'll try my best but I wanted to let you guys know in advance! And I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 21

    Aziraphale drinks his tea while looking at the fireplace. He can feel Crowley breathing deeply. He's tired. Those few hours of sleep helped but they weren't enough. There are probably still a few hours left before sunrise.

    "Aziraphale?" he calls softly.

    "Yes dear?".

    "I didn't even ask but how are you feeling? Does your head still hurt?".

    "I'm alright, it barely hurts now. But I think I'm still a little dizzy. Not right now but if I get up I should be careful".

    "I'm sure those will pass soon. Your hand will take longer to heal. It will probably leave a scar...".

    "It's alright. I have a couple of those already and they were never a problem".

    "You have?".

    "I do. But I must warn you, they're not very exciting stories".

    Crowley lifts his head to look at Aziraphale while he talks.

    "I feel when I was a kid and there were some rocks on the ground. That scar is on my left leg. Here, I can show it to you".

    Aziraphale rolls up the leg of his pajama pants and shows a scar below the knee.

    "I had some others from scraping my knees but they've faded. I was a very clumsy kid" he says almost laughing "I have another one on my back. That one has an embarrassing story to it... I was at home one evening after a very busy week. But I had a new book, a new bottle of wine and some new flowery candles. So I decided to treat myself, I deserved it after all. I drew a bath, lit up the candles, ate some food, drank some wine. Everything was perfect, I was finally ready to read that book. But as I was leaving the bathtub, I brushed against the candle holder and well... Candle wax can get really hot".

    Crowley sees Aziraphale's face turning red as he shares that story.

    "I'm sorry you didn't have the relaxing evening you were hoping for".

    "It's alright, could have been worst. At least I didn't set everything on fire. I can't even imagine all the books in the library in flames".

    "Were you at the library?".

    "No, I was at my house. But it's on the side of the library. There's even a door connecting the two".

    "Oh, that's nice".

    "It is. I can borrow any book at any time" Aziraphale responds but it didn't feel as "nice" as it would have felt a few weeks ago.

    His library is his job, but most importantly it is his safe space. But going back home tastes bittersweet now.

    "You should get some sleep" Crowley says.

    "Alright dear" he agrees with a smile.

    Aziraphale feels Crowley breathing deeply but can't do the same. There was too much to think about. His heart beats fast, conflicted and confused. He never thought he would be questioning if returning is what he truly wants. His library means so much to him. He wants to return. He can't abandon his place. He's been working for too long to keep his library safe and standing tall. He can't lose it. He won't. He'll be back in no time. But how will he be able to stay there without knowing if Crowley's safe? Even if they share letters, they take days to reach one another. Crowley would be alone. But he won't be forgotten. There will always be a place in Aziraphale's heart for Crowley. He'll be missed.

    "How am I supposed to abandon you?" he thinks.

    His heart is divided. He holds onto Crowley hoping to find some piece of mind.

    "Are you alright Aziraphale?" he hears soon after.

    He opens his eyes and sees Crowley looking back at him worried.

    "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you" he answers trying to hide his face.

    "Did something happen?".

    He can't answer. Crowley notices some tears shining with the moonlight.

    "Do you want to tell me what's wrong?" he asks softly.

    Aziraphale shakes his head too nervous to speak.

    "Would you like a hug?".

    He nods slowly and Crowley hugs him tight. He doesn't know what happened but he can almost hear his heart beating fast. He feels Aziraphale's desperate embrace. He doesn't want to let go. So Crowley waits. That's all he can do.

    He hears a whispered "I'm sorry" and leans closer.

    "You have nothing to apologize for, you did nothing wrong".

    "What if I do? What if I do the wrong thing?" Aziraphale asks, his voice trembling.

    "I don't think you can do such a thing".

    They stay quiet. Crowley's unsure of how much time passed but eventually he feels Aziraphale's grasp soften. He was tired, close to falling asleep, but his half-opened eyes couldn't stop looking at Crowley.

    "It's alright. Get some rest. I'll stay here with you" he says.

    He rests beside Aziraphale, still feeling his arms gently around him.

    "I'll stay awake" he thinks "Make sure you're okay".

    But his thoughts are abruptly interrupted. Without any warning, he feels Aziraphale kiss him on the cheek.

    "Thank you dear" he whispers.

    Crowley looks at him but his eyes are already closed. If Aziraphale wasn't asleep yet he was really close to. He's left speechless. Paralyzed. His heart is racing more than his mind. Does Aziraphale know what he did? Or was he too sleepy to know? Why did he do that? Did it really happen? Could it have been his imagination? What does it mean? Crowley doesn't have any answers. But he can still feel the warmth of Aziraphale's lips on his skin. His brain stops functioning for a few minutes as he processes what just happened. He snaps out of it when he hears Aziraphale mumble something.

    "Is he sleep talking again?" he questions.

    Crowley looks at him. His face was still shining because of the half-dried tears. He had a serious expression but all of his words were coming out mangled with each other. The only word he discerned was "library".

    "You'll be back soon" Crowley whispers "I promise".

    Aziraphale wakes up and sees sunlight entering the living room. He opens his eyes and sees Crowley next to him.

    "Morning" he says.

    "Good morning Crowley" Aziraphale mumbles.

    "How are you feeling?".

    "It's hard to say. I'm... calm at least. But there's still a lot of anxious thoughts roaming around my mind".

    "Would breakfast help?".

    "Oh, yes please!" he answers with his eyes sparkling.

    Crowley brings him something to eat and stares at him as he does.

    "Are you alright dear? You seem odd".

    "It's fine, I'm fine".

    That was clearly a lie.

    "Was it something I did?" he asks nervously.

    Crowley looks him in the eyes trying to figure out if he knows what he did.

    "Oh, it was..." Aziraphale exhales "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to act that way. I don't usually let my feelings take control like that. I just couldn't handle it and for a brief moment, I allowed my mind to contemplate everything. But it got a little out of hand. I didn't mean to break down-".

    "No, no, no..." Crowley repeats a few times "It's fine. I mean, it's not fine. You're not feeling well. But you don't have to apologize for that. You don't have to hide your problems from me, I'm here to help".

    "Then what is it?".

    Crowley looks at him again and then looks away.

    "It's nothing. It may be better if you don't remember anyway".

    Aziraphale's gears start turning. What is it that he does not remember? He remembers hugging Crowley and hearing his reassuring words. And after a while, he felt tired, he could barely keep his eyes open. And then- he remembers. Crowley glances at him and sees his face turning red.

    "I'm sorry, I didn't- I mean" he stutters finding it hard to put more than two words together at a time.

    After a few more failed attempts he can finally assemble a coherent sentence.

    "Are you mad at me?".

    "Why would I be?".

    "I feel like I may have crossed a line".

    Crowley could be feeling many things, but being mad wasn't one of them. He was confused and afraid. Thinking about it made his blood rush through his body. Even before the curse, his parents were not the affectionate kind. The way Aziraphale treats him is new to him. No one ever did the same. Everything that happens is a new experience that he has to learn to understand. And every time he's left speechless and craving for more.

    "Should I not have done it?" Aziraphale asks.

    "It's alright. I'm not upset if that's what you're worried about. I was just caught by surprise, that's all".

    "I'm sorry. Should I warn you next time?".

    Crowley's eyes open wide and he looks at Aziraphale, who's holding his hands together to calm down.

    "I don't have to do it again" he nervously corrects himself "I shouldn't have said that. Just forget I said anything. Or that I did anything".

    He tries to hide his face as he stumbles on his words, but feels Crowley slowly slithering closer.

    "You don't have to warn me" he says with a slight tremble to his voice "But you can ask".

    Even if he's trying not to show much, Aziraphale can see Crowley's nervousness. He gently strokes his scales and gets calmer.

    "I will. But you can ask too if you want".

    After breakfast, Aziraphale went back to his room. He was feeling better, his head didn't hurt and he wasn't dizzy anymore, but Crowley insisted on him not wandering around alone. Being in his room wasn't a bad thing, it gave him time to think. Is there a way to keep both his library and Crowley safe? If there is then Aziraphale is determined to find it. He loses track of time thinking about all the possibilities. None of them were good enough, not to his standards.

    "Are you alright?" Crowley asks.

    Aziraphale takes his hands off his face and looks at him unmotivated.

    "I am, thank you" he says after a deep breath "Did you make lunch? I can smell something".

    "That's why I'm here, came to see if you wanted to eat".

    "I certainly do" he says with a smile.

    Food always made him feel better. Crowley seemed to have picked up on that. They sit at the dining table and Aziraphale enjoys his lunch.

    "Do you have plans for the afternoon?" he asks, curious.

    "I don't know" Crowley answers looking outside.

    "Do you want to spend some time in the garden?".

    "It's been a while since I checked in on the plants. Don't want them to get the wrong ideas".

    "You should go" Aziraphale says smiling "The weather is nice too, it's a great day for gardening".

    "I don't mind staying in and reading with you".

    "Are you afraid something will happen to me if you leave me alone?".

    "I'm not" Crowley responds annoyed.

    "If you want, I can take the book outside and read to you while you garden".

    "That sounds... nice".

    Aziraphale smiles and continues to eat his lunch. After spiraling all morning, going outside was a good break. The air was fresh and the sun was shining through some of the clouds. He sat down on the front steps and read to Crowley as he worked. The book was approaching its final conflict, there were only a few chapters left to read. As Aziraphale sees the pages on his right hand lowering in number, his heart hurts a little. He knows that soon he'll be going back to his library. He can't wait to be there again. But the dilemma is still the same. And there's still no solution in sight.

    He lifts his eyes from the book for a moment and looks at Crowley. He can't avoid smiling. After a deep breath, he continues reading. It is not the moment to think about what he can do. He should be enjoying the nice weather, the smell of the plants in the air, and Crowley's company. And Aziraphale doesn't want to waste a second of that.

    At the end of the day, he's getting to go to bed and Crowley brings him his tea.

    "You didn't have to, I can make it myself".

    "I think 'Thank you Crowley' sounds more like you".

    Aziraphale exhales and smiles.

    "Thank you dear".

    Crowley stays still, not knowing if he should leave or stay. After a few sips of his tea, Aziraphale notices Crowley's awkward stance.

    "What are you waiting for?".

    "Me?" he questions startled "I'm not waiting for anything".

    "You don't have to stay if you don't want to" he says looking at his almost empty teacup "But I would prefer if you stayed here with me".

    Crowley takes a few seconds before slithering into bed next to Aziraphale. He finishes his tea and gets under the covers.

    "Do you have anything planned for tomorrow?" Crowley asks.

    "Not really. Why do you ask?".

    "There's something I want to do, that's all".

    "Can I know what it is?".

    "No".

    "Do I need to prepare something?".

    "Also no. But you should get some rest".

    "Alright, I'll try".

    Aziraphale smiles and closes his eyes only to open them a couple of seconds later.

    "Humm... Crowley?".

    "Yes?".

    He blushes and looks away momentarily.

    "Can I...?".

    Crowley understands what he's asking and nods. If he could, he would be blushing too. Aziraphale kisses him on the forehead and rests his head on the pillow again.

    "Good night dear" he says with a soft smile.

    "Night" Crowley answers.

    He sees Aziraphale slowly falling asleep while he stays up a little later thinking about his surprise.

    "Tomorrow will be a great day" he thinks.

    Crowley saw the way Aziraphale looked that afternoon. How he closed his eyes to smell the wind. The way the sun lit up his face. He didn't expect to see him enjoy the outside that much since he's a librarian, but he clearly had a great time. Crowley knows he'll be returning sooner than later, but he wants to take him somewhere before he goes. They deserve to after all that happened. And it has always been a safe space for him.

    "I hope you'll like it" he thinks snuggling closer to him.

    A few towns over, someone had a busy day. Muriel spoke to Gabriel on their lunch break.

    "What do you mean you're leaving?" he said.

    "I won't be gone for long, I promise".

    "I thought Aziraphale was fine. Why do you have to go meet him?".

    "Well, you see, there have been some new developments" Muriel lied "So I need to go. But we'll be back soon, the both of us. And there are no events coming soon in the library so it shouldn't be a problem".

    "Fine" Gabriel agreed to end the conversation "But when you're back tell Aziraphale he and I need to talk".

    "Of course, I'm sure he will have a lot to tell you, Gabriel".

    They return to the library to finish their work day. Some things need to be taken care of before leaving. When they're about to close, the door opens. It's Michael again.

    "Uriel heard you were leaving the library" they say.

    "I am".

    "Why is that?".

    "I'm sorry, I can't discuss internal library business with you. But if you have a book you'd like you can take it today or wait until next week".

    "I don't want any of your books".

    "Then why did you come here?" Muriel asks nervously.

    "There's something going on. It's about Aziraphale, he left, we all know that. But why?".

    "As I said last time, Mr. Fell is taking care of some delicate library business".

    "Tell me, Muriel, don't you know that lying is a sin?".

    They stay quiet.

    "We both know there's something more going on, and you will tell me what it is".

    Muriel feels their heart racing. They can't tell the truth, that Aziraphale is being kept captive by a giant talking snake. They don't even know what state he's in, or if they'll find him well. The guilt of leaving him there has been consuming them slowly. Muriel knows Aziraphale isn't a weak person, they've seen him deal with plenty of difficult situations. And when push comes to shove he can always find the strength to speak up and be assertive. And since Muriel is the one in charge of the library now, that's what they need to do.

    "I told you I can't discuss private matters with you. Lying may be a sin in your church. But in this establishment, we have our rules. One of them is that the library closes at 7 pm. So you have around 5 minutes to either find a book to take home or leave. If you don't I'll have no problem with forcing you out".

    Michael looks at them up and down and scoffs.

    "My problems are with Aziraphale. Not you. Be careful with the side you choose".

    They leave the library and Muriel leans their back against the wall. Their hands are trembling, only able to wipe the tears from their face.

    "He's fine, I'll find him and bring him back. What harm can a giant... talking... snake do...?" they whisper.

    It isn't a reassuring thought to have, but as always they try to stay optimistic. They sit down on the floor for a few minutes before getting up.

    "If Mr. Fell trusted me to take care of the library, he believes in me. I can do it".

Author's note

    Here's chapter 21 of "The Serpent's carnations"! And this one was super sweet! I love these two so much. And we heard back from Muriel again! It's been a while. But what do you think Aziraphale will decide? And I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 22

    Aziraphale wakes up with his head on top of Crowley. He stretches and leans closer with his eyes closed. He had some weird dreams that night as well, he sleep-talked again. Crowley doesn't mind, but he does worry about what those dreams are. Aziraphale wraps one of his arms gently around Crowley and takes a deep breath. Soon after, he feels him moving around.

    "Good morning" Crowley says lifting his head.

    A soft smile forms on Aziraphale's face and he opens his eyes.

    "Good morning Crowley" he mumbles.

    "How are you feeling?".

    "I'm… alright" he answers after a second to think "How about you?".

    "I'm a little tired, didn't sleep that well tonight".

    "Was it because of me?" Aziraphale asks hesitantly.

    "No, no" Crowley repeats "I was just... Thinking about today".

    "Thinking about the surprise?".

    Aziraphale looks at Crowley with his eyes full of curiosity.

    "Don't look at me like that, it's not a big deal. It's really nothing extraordinary, it's just nice I guess, I don't know. Just don't get your expectations up".

    "I'm sure it will be delightful dear" he responds smiling.

    "You can stay here a little longer if you want, I'll make you some breakfast and then get some things ready".

    "Do you need any help?".

    "No, not really".

    "I guess I'll wait here then".

    Crowley slithers out of bed leaving Aziraphale alone. His smile slowly fades away as he contemplates the ceiling. When he finds himself alone his mind can't help but think about his dilemma. He can feel his heart rate rising slightly.

    "Are you alright?" Crowley asks entering the room.

    He soon returns to his previous self and gives him a nervous smile.

    "Yes, just thinking".

    "Do you need something?".

    "Just this lovely breakfast" he answers picking up the plate Crowley brought him "Thank you, dear".

    "Are you sure that's all?".

    "Yes, I'm sure I'll feel much better after eating".

    "Alright. You should get dressed too after".

    "Of course. But I think I should know the occasion to dress appropriately".

    "Good try, I'm not telling you anything. But find something comfortable I guess".

    Crowley takes a look at Aziraphale's face and slithers back to bed. He didn't want to leave him there eating alone. He's unsure of the reason for his preoccupied state in the last couple of days. Staying close seems like a good decision.

    "Don't you have some things to do?" Aziraphale asks, but it's clear he wants Crowley to stay.

    "It can wait. I'll leave when you need to get dressed".

    They stay quiet during breakfast. Not awkwardly tough. It was a peaceful silence.

    After Aziraphale puts down the empty plate, Crowley lifts his head.

    "How does your hand feel?" he asks.

    Every time he looks at those bandages he can't help but feel guilty.

    "It's hard to say. It hurts a little and it's hard to fully move my hand. And it feels very hot. But I don't think it's getting worse" Aziraphale answers with a soft smile.

    "It will get better soon, I'm sure of it".

    "I believe in you dear".

    "I'll let you be for a moment. But I'll be back soon to take care of your hand".

    Crowley slithers away and goes in the direction of the kitchen. He didn't make anything too complicated, but filled a basket with food for a picnic, along with a couple of other things. It took him some time to get everything ready. His heart kept beating faster than usual.

    "I hope he'll have a good time" Crowley thinks.

    That's all he wishes. For Aziraphale to have a nice day. It shouldn't be too much to ask for. He closes the basket and heads back to Aziraphale's room. After knocking, he hears "Come in" from the other side of the wall.

    "I see you're ready" he points out now that Aziraphale has gotten dressed.

    "I hope this is okay. Are we going somewhere?".

    "Yes, and you're... looking great" Crowley answers making him blush.

    "Thank you".

    He sits back in the bed and holds out his hand. He still had a hard time looking at his injury when it was uncovered but he was getting used to it.

    "I'm sorry" Crowley says.

    "You don't have to apologize dear, we've done that already. All is good now".

    "I know, but I'm sorry that this hurts you every time".

    "It just stings a little, nothing I can't handle. You're doing a good job".

    "Thank you Aziraphale".

    Crowley finishes and takes a deep breath.

    "There you go".

    "Thank you" he responds with a smile "Are we going now?".

    Aziraphale's eyes were open wide staring impatiently at Crowley.

    "Yes, come on".

    He gets up from the bed excited and follows Crowley. The basket is immediately noticed in the living room.

    "Do you mind taking that? It's a little hard for me to carry it around".

    "Of course, lead the way".

    They leave the house and Crowley heads in the opposite direction of the town. After a short walk, he turns to the forest. There was a path, mostly covered by plants, but there seemed to be an opening at the bottom of Crowley's size. It wasn't hard for Aziraphale to walk over it, but he tried to be careful not to take the wrong step.

    "I'm sorry, I think I'm the only one who knows about this place. The path isn't very wide. But we're almost there".

    "I'm right behind you".

    It took them just a couple more minutes to reach their destination. Aziraphale notices the grass in front, allowing him to walk more carelessly. He straightens his jacket and brushes off a couple of leaves that had stuck to his clothes before looking up. There was a small river in front of them and an opening in the forest where the sun was shining through. The sound of the water and the wind brushing across the leaves of the trees was enchanting. It looked like a scene straight out of one of Aziraphale's fantasy books. Magical is the best way to describe it.

    Crowley looks up after noticing Aziraphale standing there in silence. He gently takes the basket of his hands without disturbing his focus and starts to set up their spot. He spread out a picnic rug, making sure the ground underneath was comfortable.

    "It's beautiful" Aziraphale whispers.

    "I'm glad you like it. But don't just stand there, you can take a sit".

    After a few more seconds of taking in the view, Aziraphale's gaze moves up. He takes a deep breath and an honest smile forms on his face. Crowley sees him walk over to him and lay on the mat next to him.

    "Do you come here often?".

    "Occasionally. It's better during summer, now it's too cold to go in the river".

    "We should come here again then. When it's warmer".

    Aziraphale keeps looking up at the sky between the tree branches. There was something special about that place. It felt like a different world. Nothing bad could happen there. They were safe there. He feels Crowley slithering closer until he's resting his head on his chest.

    "We can come here anytime you want" he whispers.

    "Anytime..." Aziraphale repeats.

    But it wasn't truly "anytime", was it? Maybe for as long as he stays there. He can't casually come over from his library on a weekend to have a picnic. That place is too far away for that. They will be too far apart. Crowley could feel Aziraphale's breathing become irregular. He looks up and sees his eyes full of tears and the smile he previously had now completely faded.

    "Are you alright? Crowley asks "You've been feeling down for a while now. Can you tell me what's going on?".

    "I'm sorry" he says noticing his own state "I-".

    Aziraphale starts a new sentence but his voice stops. The words don't want to come out. He closes his eyes for a second and tries to push away his tearful tone.

    "I don't know if I want to return" he says.

    Crowley watches as Aziraphale's expression changes. He was holding back his doubts but now that he spoke out loud, he can't help but look mortified. How could he say that? Or even think that? He can't stay. He needs to go back.

    Crowley doesn't know what to say. The only thing he can think of doing is to slither closer to comfort Aziraphale. He turns on his side to hold onto Crowley, who embraces him.

    "Is that what's been bothering you these last few days?" he asks softly.

    Aziraphale nods in agreement.

    "I'm sorry" he cries.

    "It's okay, you didn't do anything wrong. Just take some deep breaths alright? We can talk about it when you're feeling better".

    He stays quiet allowing Aziraphale to hear their surroundings again. He holds onto Crowley and takes a shaky deep breath. He opens his eyes slightly and looks at the grass next to Crowley's scales. Some more deep breaths later, his heart was beating at a slower rate again.

    "I'm sorry" Aziraphale says "I didn't mean to ruin our picnic".

    "You didn't ruin anything. But can you tell me what you mean by not wanting to return?".

    "My library... Is what I worked for my whole life. I love it so much. I couldn't wait to go back. But now... Anytime I think about being there again I can only imagine you still here".

    "If you're worried about my safety, you don't have to. And you don't have to worry about the curse either. I'll be fine".

    "But I won't. I'll miss you. I'll miss holding you. And being next to you. And hearing your voice. It's like I miss you already and you're still next to me" Aziraphale stays quiet for a moment before continuing "But if I stay here... I don't know how to keep my library safe. I've been trying to come up with a solution but it seems worthless. I don't know what to do...".

    Aziraphale's words make Crowley's mind race. He can't even process it properly. The only thing clear in his mind is that he needs to help Aziraphale somehow. What can he do? He tries to find the right words but it is hard to speak. Should he do something instead? He's already hugging Aziraphale, there isn't much more he can do. Should he grab the food? It doesn't seem appropriate.

    "I'm sorry" Aziraphale says interrupting his train of thought "I don't even know if you'd let me stay. I didn't even ask you. I'm sorry, I- I think I was afraid to know. If I had a solution then it would be easier to speak with you. At least I would have a plan. I don't know what else I can say".

    "If your library wasn't part of this matter" Crowley asks "You would choose to stay with me?".

    "If you'd let me".

    "I'd like for you to stay" Crowley says struggling with his words "But you can't. I can't let you. Not if it means you'll lose your library. We can think of something, I'll help you. But I want you to be okay. Not just okay, happy. That's all I want for you. And you won't be happy if you abandon your library. So let me make this easy for you. You can stay as long as your library is taken care of. You can come visit for a couple of days if that's all you can risk. But you can also stay for months. As long as you take the necessary steps to guarantee everything will be fine".

    Crowley feels Aziraphale hugging him closer.

    "I didn't want to push this onto you" he whispers.

    "You didn't. I want to help you".

    "Can I ask you the same thing you asked me?".

    "What was it?".

    "If there was no risk of me losing my library... Would you let me stay with you?".

    Crowley never imagined he would be contemplating that idea before that day. But his heart started to beat faster just from thinking about it. Having Aziraphale's company every day. Feeling his affection. Hearing him talk. It sounds like it would be a change but it didn't feel like it anymore. It would be a new constant in his life. One that he craved to have.

    "I wouldn't hesitate. I'll always want you here".

    "I'll find a way" Aziraphale stutters "I'll be here as much as I can. I'll figure this out".

    "We'll figure this out together, alright? I'm here to help. But you don't have to think about that now. A solution will come eventually. We just need to pay attention".

    Aziraphale takes a deep breath, still shaken from their conversation.

    "Thank you dear".

    Crowley could feel Aziraphale's heart beating faster once more, and with it, his feelings felt more intense. He can feel that those feelings won't fade anytime soon. Even if they're apart. They'll stay there. Knowing that makes him want to lean in closer, and so he does. Aziraphale makes him feel safe. Not because he's the one giving him his humanity, but because he's the only one to ever be this caring towards him.

    "Crowley?" Aziraphale calls gently.

    "Yes?".

    "Can I?".

    "Please do".

    Crowley feels a soft kiss on his cheek followed by Aziraphale's face leaning against him. The sun was shining on them through the leaves.

    "How do you know about this place?" Aziraphale asks in an attempt to lighten the mood.

    "I just spent some time exploring the surroundings when I was younger. I was still figuring out how to live like this. But I found some nice places. It's nice to share them with you".

    "I'm glad you brought me here. It's beautiful".

    After some moments of quietly laying on the picnic mat, Crowley slightly lifts his head. Aziraphale opens his eyes curious and turns his gaze in the same direction.

    "Is everything alright dear?".

    "Yes, sorry, I just heard something over there. It's probably an animal".

    "Are there a lot of animals here?" Aziraphale asks, hoping the answer is yes.

    "There are. They won't come close though. Animals don't really feel safe around me, it's part of their instinct I guess. Can't blame them, it's only natural to avoid predators. But I'm sorry, you look like you wanted to see them".

    "It's alright. I rather look at you anyway".

    Crowley looks at Aziraphale, who's smiling and slightly blushing. He always finds a way to surprise him.

    "What do you usually do when you come here?".

    "I like to lay in the sun. Take a nap. And during the summer I swim sometimes. There isn't much to do here, but I did bring us lunch. And I also brought the book" Crowley says a tad nervous "We don't have to read it though, just if you want to".

    "I would love to read it to you. We're on the last pages already. Only one chapter and the epilogue left".

    They find a comfortable place right next to a tree and Aziraphale reads the last few pages of the book. Crowley brushed against his hands after he heard the last words. The story did have a happy ending after all. Finishing the book has a bittersweet taste, but they both know that the book isn't what keeps them together. And they're happy to share that story. One day they may read another one. That's all they can hope for. After talking about their favorite moments for a few minutes, Crowley grabbed their lunch. Aziraphale's eyes immediately sparkled with joy. He has always liked the concept of picnics but hasn't had that many chances to enjoy one.

    "Thank you Crowley" he says looking at him tenderly "I... I really needed something like this to clear my mind".

    "I thought you did. This place always calms me down, I'm glad it helped you too".

    It wasn't the place that helped him. It was Crowley. Being able to share his worries with him made everything less lonely. He doesn't know how to thank him properly, but he hopes Crowley knows he's the one making him feel better.

    "I think I would like to do something tomorrow".

    "What is it?".

    "I'd like to return the ball to those kids. I fixed it. They're probably missing it. And I thought I could give them something extra. As a peace offering of sorts".

    "What were you thinking?".

    "I thought about biscuits. Food always seems to make people happy. And I know a great recipe".

    "Are you sure that's what you want to do?".

    "As long as you agree with it. After all, this affects you directly more than me".

    Crowley takes a short moment to rethink his suggestion.

    "I think it's alright. As long as I can try some of the biscuits".

    "Of course dear. I'll save us a batch".

    They spend the rest of the afternoon at their riverside picnic spot. Ideas are shared regarding what will happen next, what solutions they could try, and what other books they would like to read together. Aziraphale joined Crowley in the sun and they both stayed quietly as they enjoyed each other's company. For some moments, there was nothing to worry about. Their hearts were at peace. Crowley knew that even if they were apart, Aziraphale would still care for him. And Aziraphale knew that even if he couldn't find a perfect solution, Crowley would be there for him. Their worries were put aside while they were under the sunlight. That warm feeling was enough to make someone smile. And sharing that light with someone only makes it better. No words were needed. With their eyes closed, they breathe in deeply and take in all the little sounds in their surroundings. They're so focused on what surrounds them that they don't even notice how their heartbeats occasionally sync with one another.

Author's note

    Here's chapter 22 of "The Serpent's carnations"! I love their cute little date! And they're finally talking about what to do next. Do you think they'll find some sort of solution? I apologize if there were any spelling mistakes. And just a note, I'll be updating every other Sunday from now on. I started a full time recently and I don't want to rush the chapters or the drawings. I hope you can understand! If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 23

    As the day passed by, the sun started to lower. It wasn't late but the days were getting shorter. Soon it would get colder outside. So Crowley and Aziraphale pack their picnic and head home.

    "Thank you again for the surprise dear. It was lovely".

    "I'm glad you had a good time. I did too. Should I light up the fireplace?".

    "Yes, please. I'll meet you there in a second. Just need to prepare something for the biscuits".

    "Do you need help?".

    "No, it won't take long. I just need to make the jam today. But we can stay on the couch while it cooks".

    "I'll set up everything then".

    After some minutes, Aziraphale takes a sit on the couch. Crowley joins him ready to change the bandages on his hand.

    "I'm not sure when you're going back. But you have to promise me you'll take care of your hand. I don't want it to get worse, alright?".

    "I'll do my best".

    They stay quiet for a few seconds until Crowley gathers the courage to dive deeper into that topic.

    "I'm not sure if you have a date yet. But I'm assuming you'll be leaving soon".

    "I might stay a few more days. But I think I'm pushing on the limits of my absence already".

    "Then we can do whatever you want these last few days".

    "You're making it sound like I won't see you again..." Aziraphale comments nervously.

    "Sorry, I didn't mean to. I know you'll visit".

    "And you'll be here right?".

    "I will. There's no need to worry".

    "There is though. I won't even be able to send you any letters if the mailman doesn't get close to this house".

    "Hey, look at me" Crowley says "It's gonna be okay. You may be too stressed and tired to see it but it's going to be alright".

    Aziraphale looks at him and hugs him after a few seconds.

    "Do you think if I speak to the mailman tomorrow he will deliver letters here?".

    "I don't see why you can't try".

    "I try not to resort to threats... But can I tell him that you'll eat him if he doesn't deliver my letters?".

    "Hell no, find your own threats".

    "Alright. I hope it doesn't reach that point though".

    After a couple of hours, the jam had been finished and they had eaten dinner. They're on the couch again, this time with a hot cup of tea. The weather keeps getting closer so Crowley picks up some extra blankets.

    "I hope I don't make you cold" he says "If I do, you can let me know".

    "Don't be silly. You may be a little colder but it's nothing that bothers me".

    Crowley rests his head on Aziraphale's lap and takes a comfortable deep breath.

    "Is your skin also cold when you turn human?" Aziraphale asks hesitantly.

    He's unsure of how much Crowley wants to share but holding back his curiosity is showing to be hard.

    "It is. Not as cold as it is now, but colder than a person".

    "Does it feel... Bad to be cold? Or is it something you don't even notice?".

    "It was scary in the beginning. It felt strange. But I don't think I feel cold. I really don't like feeling cold. I rather feel warm. Stay out in the sun. Or sit here next to the fireplace. Or stay close to you".

    Aziraphale smiles with a slight blush on his face and finishes his tea.

    "Come on, let's go get some sleep" he says softly.

    Crowley follows him to bed and they both lay together underneath the bedsheets. He looks at Aziraphale almost waiting for something.

    "Good night dear".

    "Humm- Yeah, good night...".

    "Do you want a good night kiss?" Aziraphale asks.

    Crowley nods embarrassed. It's such a simple thing. Just a kiss. But it's something he never had. He can't explain how it makes him feel. It's almost overwhelming but not quite there. It's in that sweet spot where the heart races with the emotion but it's gentle enough not to cause a breakdown.

    "Thank you" he says.

    "Now come here, I don't want you to be cold".

    He holds Crowley closer, making sure he's covered by their blanket. It didn't take long for them to fall asleep. It had been a long day. They were tired. But now they can rest. Or at least they can try.

    Crowley starts to hear something. A voice. A familiar voice. He wakes up slowly and realizes it's Aziraphale. He's right there next to him sleeping. But he seems upset.

    "Please..." he mumbles amongst unrecognizable words.

    Crowley stays quiet trying to understand what he's saying. The words were broken in pieces but he could put some of them together. But as soon as he understands his heart starts to race. The words "Crowley", "library", "together", "come with me". Aziraphale wants him to go with him. Or maybe that's what he wants in his dream. He hasn't asked Crowley to go with him. He said he could in the past, he would be safe in the library, but he hasn't mentioned it after the more recent events. It isn't hard to understand why Aziraphale would want that. His library would be taken care of and Crowley would be safe next to him. But he can't go. Back when Aziraphale first suggested this, Crowley brushed it off, lightly explaining that he wouldn't belong or be welcome in such a place. He still believes that. A giant snake and a library don't seem like they would mix well together. But the truth lies deeper than that.

    Crowley has lived in that house from the moment he was born. After the curse was set in place, he was stuck there. What happened inside those walls is undescribable but he didn't want to leave, not at first at least. For years all he wanted was for those cold rooms to be filled with warmth again. He missed his home while standing in the middle of it. There was nothing in that house meant to make him feel welcome.

    After successfully escaping, the house was empty. The only thing he could do was wander around the rooms until he was too exhausted and shocked to do anything. He stayed there for who knows how long without moving. He could only barely move his eyes. Everything was quiet. There was no danger in that house anymore. When he slowly started to get his energy back, he started to fix his environment. He started with the kitchen, there wasn't much there that would haunt him. He took out whatever wasn't needed. Organized the cabinets. Cleaned the counters. And slowly, that room's atmosphere started to change. When he looked out to the living room and the hallway, he could feel a chill run through his body. The remains of his years of torture were still lingering out there. But the kitchen was free from that now. Being in that room made him feel like he hadn't in years. He was safe. He had somewhere that belonged to him. That brought him some sense of peace. But having that room fixed made him dreadful to go anywhere else. It took all his energy to make one room safe and it was the easiest one of all. Not many bad things happened there, especially when compared to the rest of his house. There weren't many memories to get through there. He wasn't ready to face everything just yet. So he stayed in that small room until he was.

    It took him some days to slither to the living room. Some more days to reach the bathroom. Then his parent's room. And at last, there was his room. He burned books, clothes, papers. He destroyed most of what he found that brought him memories. But his room was locked up for some time. He knew what was inside and didn't want to face it. And he had other problems to deal with. There was no food left. He would have to go outside. He remembered the town down the street. He hadn't been there in a long time. No one would recognize him. But what could he even do? He's a snake. But he didn't come this far to starve to death. He had to do something.

    After battling with different options, he headed to town. He can't fully remember how it went, and neither does he want to. The amount of hate and fear he felt from everyone around him only made him regret leaving the house. They would surround him at times, some tried to force him away, but most would run in the opposite direction. He managed to be back at the house with some food. He knew this wouldn't be a one-time thing, but he tried to avoid it as much as possible. He didn't want to leave the house. He felt the hate grow every time he would cross someone's path, and it only got worse when they found out where he lived. They remembered the doctors, they remembered their kid too. But they all disappeared not that long before Crowley showed up. It was rumored that he had killed them. It always made him angry when he would hear those whispers. He knew it wasn't a complete lie so he never bothered to explain it. It wouldn't be worth his time, no one would listen anyway.

    As time passed, he got comfortable with his new routine. The rumors and spiteful comments didn't affect him anymore. He had fought his memories and won back his home. Or at least most of it. One room was still locked. It took him months to face it but, eventually, he did. He threw away most of the things inside. He cleaned the dry blood still left on the floor. He burned all the papers and notes written about him. At least all he could find. The room wasn't recognizable anymore. There were no cages, no medical supplies, no notebooks. It didn't look like his prison now. He had won. He had a home now. And he's safe as long as he's there.

    Even after everything that happened, he can't bring himself to leave. In a way, he fought to have that home. Even if he isn't welcomed in the closest town, he knows he can survive as long as he stays there. He knows it will be different anywhere else, he doesn't have the strength to go through that again.

    "I'm sorry" he whispers to Aziraphale, his voice trembling.

    He snuggles closer and feels Aziraphale's arms holding him. He continued to utter nonsensical sentences, but all Crowley could think of was not being able to leave. He can't understand why he rather stay in the place that brought him so much suffering instead of going with someone who wants him. Thinking about leaving makes his heart pound off of him.

    He whispers a faint "I'm sorry" again.

    Some seconds later he feels Aziraphale moving. It felt different, he seemed more distressed. He held onto Crowley and he could feel how fast Aziraphale's heart was beating. His concern grew drastically. Crowley looks at him worried and soon after he gasps and opens his eyes. He looks around desperately, his vision still blurry from his sleep, but soon notices Crowley in his arms.

    "Hey, it's alright. It was just a nightmare" he says trying to help him calm down.

    Aziraphale's heart starts to return to normal.

    "I'm sorry I woke you..." he says.

    "It's alright. You can wake me at any time".

    Aziraphale takes a deep breath and looks at Crowley now with a clearer vision.

    "Were you awake for long? Did I say something? You don't seem fine..." he says worriedly.

    "You didn't say anything wrong. I just... Got caught up in my own thoughts".

    "Do you want to talk about it?".

    "Can you tell me about your dream first? I think it would help".

    "Alright" he says before a deep breath "I remember being here. I was about to leave, to go back to my library. But you were going with me. I don't remember all the details, I just remember going together with you. But then-".

    Aziraphale stops to let his brain know it wasn't real before continuing.

    "Some of the people that have problems with me back at my library decided to have problems with you too. I ended up waking soon after. I'm not sure of what I said...".

    "You don't say a lot, it's hard to understand. But I thought it had something to do with that. I-" Crowley stops and grunts.

    He looks away from Aziraphale, feeling angry at himself for not being able to give him that simple solution.

    "I can't leave. I know you didn't ask me to go with you, but I can't go".

    "It's alright dear. I can only imagine how scary it must be to leave. I won't ask you to do it. But I want you to know you'll always be welcome to join me".

    Crowley looks back at him with his eyes shining with the moonlight.

    "We should get some more sleep" Aziraphale says, gently brushing his fingers against Crowley's scales.

    He leans in closer and takes a deep breath.

    "Hey, Aziraphale?" he calls softly.

    "Yes dear?".

    "Can you give me a kiss?" he asks embarrassed "You know... To help me sleep better or whatever...".

    Aziraphale smiles and gives him another kiss. Crowley thanks him and they both close their eyes once more, this time with no more interruptions until morning.

    The following morning was peaceful. Crowley brought Aziraphale his breakfast to bed to start the day on a good note. He took care of his hand and after a few minutes, they were both ready to start the day. Aziraphale stayed in to bake the biscuits he had planned while Crowley took care of the garden. While in the kitchen, Aziraphale also cooked lunch for the both of them.

    "We should buy some groceries since we're going to the village anyway. If we don't, we might need to go back tomorrow".

    "We'll do it all today" Crowley responds "Did you get everything ready?".

    "Yes, I think so at least".

    "Did you bake all the biscuits?".

    "I did".

    "Can I have some for dessert?".

    "Of course dear" Aziraphale answers almost laughing.

    When he finally ate one, his pupils dilated with happiness.

    "It's been so long since I had something like this".

    "I'm glad you like them. I won't give all of them away, there will be some here for us too".

    He watches Crowley eat some more biscuits, he has never seen him this happy about food. It makes his heart feel warmer. Even if they don't help to fix any misunderstanding in the village, at least they made him happy. Crowley can sense Aziraphale's feelings getting stronger. They're constantly increasing at a slow rate, it's hard to notice the change, but occasionally, there are moments that cause a sudden shift. Crowley can't help but look at Aziraphale when it happens. After they're done eating, they get ready to leave the house.

    "Alright, I think we should give this to them first and then we go to the store".

    "Do I need to do something?".

    "You can do what feels right".

    "This doesn't feel right at all, to be honest... I don't talk to people if I can avoid it".

    "You don't have to talk if you don't want to. But I think they will love to meet a talking snake".

    "I hope you're right".

    As they leave the house, Crowley can't help but contemplate the possible outcomes of that interaction. He finds it hard to believe any good will come out of it, but seeing Aziraphale so hopeful makes him question if it's possible. But even if it goes well, what will that imply? Will he start to have people show up at his place unannounced? He hopes not. But what truly worries him is the worst-case scenario. What if it goes wrong and they try not only to hurt him but to hurt Aziraphale too? He can't let that happen. They get close to the village and he starts to feel a heavy weight pushing him down.

    "Are you alright dear?" Aziraphale asks after stopping.

    "I'm- I don't... Fuck" Crowley stumbles upon his words finding it hard to put a sentence together.

    "Come here, we can take a few minutes before continuing".

    He walks off the path they were taking and sits down by a tree. Crowley follows him and takes a deep breath. Aziraphale strokes his forehead for a couple of minutes calming him down.

    "I'm sorry, I should've realized this would be very stressful for you".

    "I agreed to do it, it's alright".

    "I can go alone if you prefer. Or we could always go back home".

    Crowley contemplates his options. One of them seemed like the smartest one. Everything would stay the same, no extra risks, and more biscuits for him. But he can't go back now. He takes a couple of seconds to close his eyes and breathe in the fresh air.

    "No, I can do it. Let's go get this over with".

    Aziraphale smiles and they continue their path to the village.

Author's note

    Here's chapter 23 of "The Serpent's carnations"! We got some more of Crowley's past in this one! What do you think will happen when they go to the village? If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 24

    When they get to town the same happened. The few people out on the streets avoided them, changed paths, turned around and disappeared. Aziraphale was starting to feel nervous but they eventually got to where they wanted. After turning a corner they were on the school street. And just like last time, there was a group of four kids with a small dog. They seemed to be playing some sort of game but the dog noticed them. He barks a couple of times to inform his human and soon all the kids turn to them.

    "Hello" Aziraphale says approaching them "I believe this is yours".

    He hands out the ball but they don't move.

    "Our teacher told you to keep it" says the boy with curly hair.

    "Yes, I know, but as you can imagine we don't have much use for it".

    "I'm not sure if we should take it back" says one nervous kid with glasses.

    He can't look away from Crowley, feeling scared.

    "We can't talk to you" the young girl says blatantly.

    "Why not?".

    "Because he eats kids. And I don't think any of us want to be eaten".

    "He doesn't eat kids" Aziraphale says looking at Crowley for a second "And even if he did, we just had lunch. He's not hungry".

    "Are you sure he doesn't?" asks a dark-haired boy "He's a giant snake after all".

    "Do you know any kids who were eaten?".

    "No, not really".

    "Then he has to be eating something else".

    "What does he eat?" asks the nervous kid.

    "Well, it depends on the day. But today he even had some biscuits. I brought some too".

    They all look doubtful at them, not believing that a giant snake would eat such things.

    "Prove it" the girl demands.

    Crowley looks at her annoyed and slightly angry.

    "Do you want one dear?".

    "Just give it to me" he hisses.

    He is not happy to eat a biscuit this time. In the midst of his annoyance, he fails to notice the kid's shocked face when he speaks.

    "There, ate a biscuit, not a- kid...?".

    As he looked back at them all he could see was four intrigued and curious faces leaning closer.

    "You can talk?".

    "Of course he can talk, you just heard him Wensleydale".

    "How is that possible?".

    "Is it magic?".

    "Are you a witch?".

    "Can you talk to Dog?".

    The kids start to fill him with questions, bumping into each other as they speak. It wasn't a very productive conversation, a lot of questions and not a single answer. At least Aziraphale managed to sort out their names.

    "Why don't you ask one question at a time?" he suggests.

    The kids share some looks, almost reading each other's minds.

    "Are you a witch?" asks Adam.

    "No" Crowley answers without giving it too much thought.

    He had been taken by surprise, there was an abrupt shift in those kids' fear. They weren't completely over it, but the curiosity was overpowering. All their questions made him more distressed, but Aziraphale's intervention made him feel calmer. Too many people speaking at the same time is not something he is used to. Having one question at a time is easier.

    "Are you poisonous?" asks Brian.

    "Snakes aren't poisonous. They're venomous" adds Wensleydale.

    "But are you?".

    "I am" Crowley answers hesitantly.

    "How can you talk?" asks Pepper.

    "I just can".

    "Do you have a name?" Wenslydale asks turning to both of them.

    "Crowley".

    "I'm Aziraphale" he answers with a smile "Can I ask you something now? That lady that said I could keep the ball, where is she?".

    "She's in the school" Adam points "She usually works on the next classes while we're on recess. You can go talk to her if that's what you want".

    "Thank you, I think I need to".

    "Thanks for bringing our ball back" Brian says.

    "And fixing it too" adds Wensleydale.

    The kids start talking to each other again and Aziraphale turns to Crowley.

    "How are you feeling?".

    "I'm... fine".

    "Do you mind if I go talk to her? You can come if you want but if you'd prefer you could stay here. I won't take long, I promise".

    "I think I'm better off staying here".

    "Alright dear. I'll be right back".

    The kids see Aziraphale walking away, leaving Crowley behind.

    "Do you want to join our game?" Adam asks.

    "Thank you but I'll let you kids play".

    "If you want to join just let us know".

    Crowley coils up and finds a comfortable pose to rest in. Occasionally he glances at that odd group of kids. He doesn't understand what they're doing but they seem to be having a good time.

    Aziraphale knocks on the school door and some seconds later that same lady opens it.

    "Hello" he says politely.

    "Hello, do I know you?" she asks confused, not knowing where she saw that face before.

    "I don't believe we've been properly introduced. I'm Aziraphale".

    "I'm Anathema" she responds still thinking.

    "What a pleasure it is to meet you. I was told you're a teacher here?".

    "Yes, me and my husband".

    "How wonderful! May I ask what you teach?".

    "We try to teach them all that we can really. I focus more on Science and English and my husband on Math and History. But we cover for each other as we need to. Do you have a kid you'd like to be enrolled?".

    "Oh, no, I was just curious. Anyway, I brought some biscuits for you and your students. I don't think we got off on the right hand but I hope this can make up for it. I also returned the ball after fixing it. They're very pleased to have it back".

    She frowns and then looks at him surprised. That's why she recognized him.

    "You're the man I saw the other day! You were with him!".

    "Yes, you see, we didn't really have much use for that ball. It wouldn't be right to keep it".

    She glances over Aziraphale's shoulder and sees Crowley resting next to the kids.

    "Well, we won't take much of your time, you must be busy. Oh, but if you need any books for your school let me know. I work at a library some towns away and we lend books to other establishments. It would be a pleasure working with you. Now, if you'll excuse me, we have to go grocery shopping".

    Aziraphale smiles as he soaks and heads towards Crowley who lifts his head. Anathema stays at the door looking at them leave, still phased by that odd interaction.

    "Are you alright?" Adam asks.

    "What?" she responds snapping back to reality "Yes, I'm alright, why do you ask?".

    "We asked you a couple of times if we could come in but you didn't answer" points out Wensleydale.

    "It's nothing. Come on, you should come in".

    As they enter their classroom, she questions them about those two individuals.

    "What did they say to you?".

    "They just wanted to return the ball" Brian answers.

    "They were actually very nice" Wenslydale adds "Even Crowley, the snake".

    "Did they say something weird?".

    "It was weird to see a snake talk, regardless of what he said" Pepper points out "But there was nothing particularly disturbing".

    "I see" Anathema responds as the wheels turn in her brain "Well, go open your notebooks. Class is starting".

    Crowley slithers alongside Aziraphale as they make their way to buy groceries.

    "You look strangely happy" Crowley notes.

    "Oh, why wouldn't I be? It went better than I imagined. Are they not scared anymore? They don't seem to be".

    "I don't think the kids are afraid. And their teacher is also changing how she feels".

    "And how do you feel, dear? Are you feeling better?".

    "I think I might. It's hard to say".

    "Let's get what we need so we can go home right after".

    "Sounds good to me".

    After entering the store, Aziraphale greets the people inside with a smile. Crowley follows him closely while looking at everyone with sharp eyes. This time the employees didn't question when Aziraphale paid. And even if not many words were exchanged between the two, Crowley could still sense a slight change in the feelings surrounding him. It was hard to tell and not a very stable change, but he noticed. He can't help but feel suspicious.

    "I think we have everything, I just need to go to the postal office to check if they would deliver my letters to you".

    "Good luck".

    They enter the establishment and Aziraphale notices a young man at the counter.

    "Can I help you?" he stutters.

    "Yes, I believe so. You see, I'll be sending some letters here and I wanted to check if you'll be able to deliver them".

    "Of course, that's my job".

    Aziraphale smiles relieved.

    "Wonderful. I was afraid you wouldn't deliver them to my friend's house" he says pointing to Crowley.

    "Oh, it's to him that you're sending the letters?".

    "Yes, is there a problem?".

    "I don't think I can do that. You see, I don't want to know what happens if I step on his property".

    "I can assure you that nothing bad will happen. As long as you don't mess with his garden of course, but that shouldn't be a hard request".

    "I guess you're right" he responds, still stumbling on his words.

    "What's your name?".

    "It's Eric, sir".

    "Well, Eric, you have my word that you'll be safe to deliver all my letters".

    "I want to send letters too" Crowley says lifting his head.

    "You do?" Aziraphale asks delightedly.

    "If I can".

    He stares at Eric whose eyes are open wide.

    "Of course, I'll do it".

    "Oh, that's marvelous! I'm glad everyone's on board. Thank you, Eric, I hope you have many letters to deliver from us".

    They leave and Aziraphale can't help but smile. He's glad they'll be able to stay in contact even after he leaves. Crowley doesn't show it, but he shares the same feelings. They start to head home but a voice stops them in their tracks.

    "You're still here?".

    They turn to their right and see that man. The one who spoke to them last time. The one who made a mistake by speaking again. Aziraphale looks at him with a chilling glare, his blue eyes ice cold.

    "Come on, just ignore him" Crowley says but notices Aziraphale isn't walking anymore.

    "I can't believe it. Has he not told you what he did? Or were you too afraid to ask?".

    After staying silent for a couple of seconds Aziraphale steps in his direction.

    "Do you mind me asking your name?".

    "Astur".

    "Well, Astur, I'm afraid I was not told what happened. Care to explain it to me?".

    Crowley looks at him confused and somewhat worried. Astur steps away from the wall he is leaning against and looks down at Aziraphale.

    "He has terrorized this city for decades. He killed two men and injured several more. You see this?" he says lifting the sleeve of his shirt "He gave me this scar. And I'm not the only one walking around with his teeth marks".

    "I see. Are you saying I should be afraid?".

    "It'd be stupid not to be".

    "Then are you afraid? Or are you stupid?".

    Astur's face fills with anger as he gets closer to Aziraphale, who doesn't flinch. Crowley's stunned by his posture, he has never seen him like that. He did act similarly once, not too long after he arrived, but he could feel it was just an act. This time it feels real.

    "I'm not the one who's living with a murderer".

    "Neither am I. You see, a murderer is someone who plans to kill. Maybe by gathering a group of people, giving them weapons, invading a house and attacking the one inside? Does that sound familiar?".

    "Listen, you little-".

    "There's no need to get huffy. But since I doubt you can be reasoned with, let me put this in words you'll understand. You learned the hard way not to mess with him. It cost people's lives. But if you ever even think about causing him any harm, I can guarantee he's not the one you should be worried about. Is that understood?".

    Aziraphale stares him down with a serious expression. Hastur eventually walks away grunting something incomprehensible. Aziraphale straightens his clothes and takes a deep breath before turning to Crowley with his usual calm smile.

    "Let's go home".

    Crowley looks at him as he walks by and quickly follows. They get home and Aziraphale puts the groceries away but he notices Crowley just staring at him, his pupils completely round.

    "Are you alright dear?" he asks.

    "Yes, why do you ask?".

    "Nothing. I was afraid you would be upset by what I said back then".

    "I was... worried at first. But it was nice of you to stand up for me".

    "Well, it was the right thing to do. I hope I don't have to actually prove my point, do you think he's clever enough to stay away?".

    "It's hard to say, he's not the brightest mind. But I think he'll be too scared to even talk to me for some time at least".

    After dinner, they sit in front of the fireplace and hear the first raindrops of the night. Aziraphale strokes Crowley's face and sees him closing his eyes.

    "We should go to bed dear".

    "Can we stay here just a few more minutes? It's so comfortable".

    "Of course dear".

    "I'm sorry to ask, but have you picked a day to return?".

    "You don't have to apologize. But yes, I'm afraid I did. I'll stay here tomorrow but it will be the last day for now. I'll leave the following morning".

    "It's alright. You can get a horse on the stables if you'd like. I don't know how expensive it would be since you don't know when you'll return exactly, but we can see if it's possible".

    "I will, thank you".

    "I hope you can read my letters... I can't really write like this, and even if I transform I don't know how legible my handwriting will be".

    "I'm sure I'll be able to understand it. But if you want, I have an old typewriter that I could gift to you".

    "I think that would help".

    Aziraphale knew that if they stayed there for a tad longer, Crowley would fall asleep, but he didn't want to move him. So he stayed. And while staring at the fireplace, he thought about what he would like to bring the next time he visits. He knows he can't take Crowley to many places, but he can bring him gifts. He can show him things he has never been able to see.

    "I'll give you all that I can" Aziraphale thinks "You deserve the world".

    Some minutes later he feels Crowley moving.

    "Aziraphale?" he mumbles.

    "Yes dear?".

    "You didn't give me a good night kiss".

    "You're right".

    "Can you?".

    "Of course, but let's go to bed alright?".

    Crowley nods but his eyes remain closed. Aziraphale smiles and carries him to bed.

    "It's colder here".

    "I know, but it won't be for long. Just stay close to me alright?".

    He nods and slithers closer. Aziraphale kisses him on the forehead and closes his eyes.

    It was a peaceful night. The rain outside didn't last for long, when they woke up it had already stopped. And both of them were determined to make the best out of that day. Nothing to elaborate, but they wanted to enjoy each other's company while they could. They make breakfast together that morning. They didn't talk much but the silence was peaceful. What they didn't expect was to hear a knock on the door. They look at each other surprised, wondering what they should do.

    "Who do you think it is?".

    "How the hell would I know?".

    "Should I go check?".

    "I don't know. It could be dangerous".

    Aziraphale grabs the metal coffeemaker and walks towards the door. As he opens it he's faced with someone unexpected.

    "Good morning" he says unable to shake the surprise look off his face.

    "I hope I'm not bothering" says Anathema on the other side of the door.

    "Who is it?" asks Crowley already moving closer.

    "It's Anathema, dear. The teacher, remember?".

    "The hell are you doing here?".

    "Don't be rude. I'm sure she has a good reason".

    "I wanted to return the basket you brought the biscuits in. They were really good, the kids loved them".

    "I'm glad. But did you come all this way because of a basket?".

    "No, I actually wanted to talk to you about your offer. I spoke with my husband and we agree that the kids would benefit from having more books to learn from. And we would have more things to teach them as well".

    "Oh, please come in. If that's alright?" he asks looking at Crowley who nods positively.

    "It's not necessary" she says a bit scared.

    "We insist. Can I offer you some coffee?".

    "I'm alright, thank you".

    She enters the house and Aziraphale closes the door. Her mind couldn't help but make her question her safety. Did she just walk into a trap? It was hard to tell. From the looks of it, the house seemed perfectly normal. Aziraphale walks her to the couch and she sees a half-eaten breakfast still on the coffee table. She sits on the armchair and Aziraphale sits on the couch. She sees Crowley slithering next to him and resting his head on his legs. His eyes were locked on her. But somehow, seeing those strange individuals act so kindly to each other made her feel somewhat safer.

Author's note

    Here's chapter 24 of "The Serpent's carnations"! I was very excited to name-drop some of these characters. I think the kids were obviously the Them, but did you guess some of the others? And I finally got to write more of angry Aziraphale, I love him being protective. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 25

    "Are you sure you don't want some coffee?".

    "Thank you, but I just had breakfast".

    "Well, then let's talk business, shall we?".

    "Yes please".

    "Maybe I should start. My library already has some partnerships with schools. To put it simply, we lend you books. Some of them you can keep through the year, and some others will be switched more regularly. We will communicate via letter, but my coworker and I can visit if necessary. I'll most likely be the one visiting since I'll be coming here anyway. You don't have to pay for the books, as long as they're taken good care of. We have a program we usually give schools as a base, but it's a baseline and not a strict guide. You can request specific books too. If you're interested, there will be a document we need the school representative to sign. A mere formality to have on the records".

    "I see. It does sound like a great opportunity. But I'm not sure we would be able to afford that".

    "There's no price associated with this project. We are a public library, we don't work for profit".

    "Yes, I understand that and it is remarkable. But if we expand our program, we might get more classes and need more teachers. And they're both hard to find and an expense I'm unsure we have the funds for. I would have to check with Pepper's mom, she's the mayor and responsible for directing the town's funds, including the school of course. I'll see if I can speak with her today. When will you need an answer?".

    "Well, I'll be leaving tomorrow. But you can always send me a letter, I'll give you the address".

    Aziraphale gives her a piece of paper with the library's address written on it.

    "I'll try to tell you something before you go. But if I don't, I'll send you a letter. I won't take more of your time now. Thank you for having me".

    She smiles and turns to Aziraphale to shake his hand. He returns both the smile and the handshake. Crowley lifts his head and she looks at him confused. She would shake his hand too but there are none.

    "I'll walk you to the door".

    "Thank you. You two have a good day" she says leaving in a surprisingly good mood.

    "I wasn't expecting that" says Aziraphale after returning to the couch "Are you feeling alright dear? I know you're not used to getting visits".

    Crowley leans in closer. He's oddly quiet making Aziraphale concerned. He holds him gently and sees him looking at the door.

    "She wasn't scared of me" he whispers.

    "She wasn't?".

    "No, not anymore... I think she's crazy".

    "Why do you say that?".

    "Why else would she come here? And why is she not scared?!".

    "I believe she isn't scared because you acted politely and didn't try to intimidate her".

    "Well, that's my point!" Crowley states incredulously "Is that all it takes? Not being a complete asshole? That shouldn't be enough not to be scared. She doesn't know me, she doesn't know who she's dealing with".

    Aziraphale looks at him with a soft smile.

    "Come here dear".

    Crowley leans on Aziraphale's chest and sighs.

    "I know you have a hard time trusting people. And you have good reasons for that. But she saw you next to the kids and you weren't hurting or scaring them. You let her into your home. And you do look rather harmless when you're resting on my lap. She must have realized that the rumors about you weren't true. You're not a monster and now she knows that, dear".

    "Does that mean she'll be returning here often? Even after you're gone?" he asks with a nervous tremble in his voice.

    "I doubt it. But you can always invite her if you'd like".

    "I don't think that's a good idea...".

    "That's alright dear, you don't have to. But at least we know she doesn't have ill intentions towards you".

    Aziraphale caresses Crowley's face gently and he takes a deep breath. It shouldn't be hard not to be hated. But he's been feared for decades, having that change is difficult even if it isn't changing for the worse. He takes a deep shaky breath and listens to Aziraphale's heart beating.

    "It would be quite nice if you two made that deal. Maybe you could visit more often that way...".

    "It would be nice indeed".

    Aziraphale contemplates the possibility of visiting more often and having a partnership with the school. But something clicked in his brain. His eyes open wide and he lets a couple of words escape in a surprised gasp.

    "That's it".

    "What is?" Crowley questions confused.

    "For the school to participate in this project, they're going to need a teacher. And I needed a reason to stay and still keep the library safe. If they take me as a teacher that could be the perfect solution. It might solve all the problems".

    "How?".

    "Hold on, I promise I'll explain everything, but I feel like if we're going forward with this I should try and catch Anathema before she gets to town".

    "Go, she probably hasn't gone too far yet".

    Crowley gives him space and he leaves the house with a big smile on his face. He sees her down the road and starts to run up to her. She eventually hears him calling her name and stops to look back.

    "Is everything alright?" she asks seeing this breathless tired man stopping next to her.

    "Yes, I'm just not used to running" he says catching his breath "But I have something important to tell you and it can't wait".

    "What is it?".

    "You said you'd need an extra teacher to be able to continue with this idea. Well, I could be that teacher".

    She gives him a few more seconds to stabilize his breathing before questioning him again.

    "Do you have any experience as a teacher?".

    "Not precisely, but I have experience with most of the books in the program. And we regularly welcome students to have study sessions and lectures. I've been hosting them for a few decades. And when I was younger I also tutored younger kids in school".

    "Alright, I can see you do have some experience in the area" Anathema says interrupting his ramble "We'll consider you for the spot if it does indeed open".

    "Oh, thank you. It would mean the world to me".

    She looks at him for a few seconds unsure if she should satisfy her curiosity.

    "I apologize if I'm crossing the line, but can I ask why you're staying with Crowley?".

    "Oh" he exhales blushing "It started with a misunderstanding, but we started to enjoy each other's company. It just… happened I guess".

    Anathema can't help but smile. It is clear to her that those two don't pose any danger. They may be an odd pair, but not in any threatening way. Even after Aziraphale leaves, she keeps thinking about them. Who would expect to find such sweetness in that house?

    Crowley stays in the living room baffled by everything that happened in that short time. He slithers outside and waits patiently. He is unsure how that would fix their problems, but he trusts Aziraphale's judgment. After a few minutes, he finally sees him returning.

    "Did you talk to her?" Crowley asks seeing Aziraphale approach the house.

    "Yes, I think they'll consider me. I'm sorry for leaving in such a rush, dear".

    "It's alright. But I still don't understand why it was so important... You said this would fix all the problems but I can't see how".

    "Let's get inside, I guess I didn't really explain anything".

    After they're both back on the couch, Aziraphale takes a deep breath.

    "Where should I start... Well, I know I've been referring to the library as mine but that's not quite the case. I'm the one in charge and without me, it wouldn't be open, but it is funded by the state. Gabriel is our mayor and he's the one deciding where the money should go. The library brings many visitants to our city and it is also relatively well known amongst knowledge seekers. It is right at the center of our town, it's beautiful. But unfortunately, not everyone is a fan of me or my library. And this particular someone is always trying to find excuses to close it. It's a long story, I don't want to bother you with all the details. But closing my library would bring them a lot of benefits. Gabriel does not particularly care where the money goes, as long as it benefits him and the town. And since I left without giving much reason... That could tip the scales to my disadvantage. That's why I have to go back".

    "And being a teacher here... Would be okay?".

    "You see, if I tell Gabriel that I'll be trying a new approach to the library's schools project, there's a good chance he'll understand and let me stay away. I'll still be in contact with Muriel, I trust them to do a good job but I don't want to just abandon them with this sort of responsibility. They may need some support. It is something I would have to discuss with them obviously, but I have high hopes it will all go well. And if I can indeed stay here... I would have a job here as well. We would still have a lot of time together but I would also have the money to pay for groceries and everything we would need. You know, I think it would be nice".

    Crowley sees Aziraphale's face blush as he smiles softly. He doesn't know how to respond. He can't help but get overwhelmed by emotions. This could be the solution, and Aziraphale shows so much hope in his voice, but he can only see everything that could go wrong.

    "I'm sorry" Aziraphale says noticing Crowley's terrified eyes "Oh dear, is this too fast? I'm sorry if I'm overstepping, I thought it would be okay".

    "I'm sorry" Crowley says with some tears forming in his eyes "I want it to work out. I want you here. But I can't believe it until it's true. I can't hope for something like this. Because if I do and it doesn't work... I'll be- I don't know what I would do. So please try to make it work. But I can't hope for more than occasional visits".

    "It's alright dear" Aziraphale says holding him close "I have enough hope for both of us".

    They cooked lunch together that day. It had been a cloudy day, but it started to rain again. Aziraphake kept the fireplace burning as Crowley rested on the couch.

    "I'm sorry" he mumbles "It's too cold you know... Even with the fireplace and the blankets and you... I didn't want to feel so sleepy".

    "It's alright dear, you can take a nap if you'd like".

    "But I want to spend time with you before you go".

    "But we are spending time together, even if you're sleeping".

    Crowley feels Aziraphale's hands laying softly on his face and leans in closer.

    "Can you please wake me up if I'm sleeping for too long?".

    "As you wish. I'll wake you up when I need to fix the fireplace, how does that sound?".

    After a quick glance at the fire, Crowley agrees. He rests his head on Aziraphale's lap and closes his eyes. They could only hear the sound of the rain outside and the crackling of the wood. And without noticing the time pass by, Aziraphale just looks at Crowley. He gently strokes the scales on his forehead while thinking of how he got there in the first place.

    "I can't believe I was ever afraid of you" he thinks.

    Remembering the fear and anger he felt when they first met only makes him want to stay closer. He feels his heart aching as he realizes that Crowley could sense his feelings.

    "I don't know how we got here... But I'm so grateful that we did" he thinks.

    After a few more minutes he realizes the room is getting darker. The fire is burning out.

    "Crowley" he whispers softly.

    "Is it time already?" he mumbles.

    "It is. But you can sleep more if you want to".

    "No, no, I'm fine" he responds yawning.

    "Let me just go fix the fireplace, I'll join you in no time".

    After Aziraphale returns to the couch, Crowley's already feeling more awake.

    "You look like you have something you want to tell me, dear".

    "I'm just thinking".

    "May I know what you're thinking about?".

    "It's about me being able to transform again...".

    "Oh, I see. I can't imagine how you must be feeling. It is quite a big change".

    "I can't say I'm upset, especially because of what it means. I wouldn't trade it for anything. But... What if I can't handle being human again? I don't even know what I look like, I haven't seen my face in so long... What if I look just like my parents now...".

    "You don't have to rush this. Take it one step at a time. And if it feels overwhelming, there's no harm in taking a step back until you're ready".

    "What if I'm never ready? Then it's not the curse's fault I'm stuck like this, it's mine. I wouldn't be able to hug you. Or- Or kiss you goodnight. Or any other of those things".

    "Oh dear, please look at me".

    Crowley attends to his wish and looks at him anxious.

    "Let's take a deep breath, alright?".

    They breathe together a few times and Crowley manages to stop his heart from racing.

    "I can see that there's a lot that worries you when it comes to this. But I also know that you're very stubborn".

    "Is that supposed to make me feel better?".

    "And brave, and you've kept fighting your whole life. I know that, if you want to, you can do it. You may need time, and that's alright. I'll be here for you".

    Crowley slithers up Aziraphale's chest and rests on his shoulder.

    "I know you're worried too. But you're also curious".

    "It's hard not to be".

    "I can't show you yet... But would you like me to describe myself to you?".

    "I would love that, dear".

    Crowley takes a deep breath and feels Aziraphale's embrace.

    "I'm sure a lot has changed, but some things stay the same I believe. I had light skin, similar to yours but with some freckles. My hair was curly and almost red. I kept it long while I could".

    Crowley stops talking, leaving room for a memory to slip to the front of his mind. He remembers having his hair cut short. He did not like it.

    "I'm sorry, I don't know what I look like now. I can't tell you much more".

    "It's alright. Thank you for sharing. Should I make some tea now? We still have some biscuits to eat".

    "That would be lovely".

    Aziraphale pours the tea into a couple of teacups but suddenly someone knocks at the door.

    "Is it Anathema?" Crowley asks.

    "I didn't see her pass outside, and I don't think she would return here with all this rain".

    "I'll go check".

    Before Aziraphale could put down the hot kettle, he heard Crowley opening the door.

    "What are you doing-".

    "Where is Mr. Fell?" a familiar voice says from the outside "What have you done to him? Mr. Fell! Can you hear me?!".

    "Hey, stop screaming" Crowley hisses.

    "Muriel?" Aziraphale asks as he walks out of the kitchen.

    He rushes to the door and sees Muriel drenched in the rain calling out for him.

    "I'm here, I'm here" he says as he gets outside.

    "Mr. Fell!" they say with a few tears running down their face "You're alright!".

    "I am-" before he could finish the sentence, Muriel hugged him "Oh, dear, you're shaking. You'll get sick".

    "I'll change my clothes at the inn, we can stay there, let's go".

    "Go? Oh my... I believe we have a lot to talk about".

    "We can talk when we're out of here".

    Muriel notices Crowley slithering closer and stands in front of Aziraphale.

    "You can't keep him here anymore, he's going home" they say determined yet scared "Stay back!".

    "Muriel, please calm down. It's alright. He is not going to hurt us".

    "He's not?".

    "No, you're safe".

    "I don't understand... I thought- I thought I wouldn't find you...".

    Aziraphale holds Muriel as they cry.

    "I'm sorry, I'll explain everything".

    He can feel the guilt grow in his heart.

    "They shouldn't stay like that. I'll heat up some water for a bath. You'll get sick too if you stay outside" Crowley whispers.

    Aziraphale looks at him and mouths "Thank you".

    He nods and slithers away for a moment.

    "Come on dear, let's get you inside".

    "Wait, what about Cupperty? I should get him to the stables".

    "I don't think you should be running around any longer. You're freezing".

    "I can't leave him like that".

    "I'll-" Aziraphale stops mid-sentence.

    He was about to volunteer to take Cupperty himself, but he can't leave Muriel and Crowley alone. He could see how scared Muriel was, and he couldn't leave Crowley alone like that either.

    "We'll take care of him" Crowley says as he returns to the door.

    "Come on, I was making tea. You should have some".

    Muriel agrees to get inside the house. While Crowley takes care of the bath, Aziraphale helps them get in front of the fireplace. Their backpack was also partially wet, but there were still some dry clothes inside.

    "Here you go, dear".

    "Thank you" Muriel stutters as they grab the the warm tea cup.

    "I know you must be feeling confused. And I'll explain everything, I promise. But for now all you need to know is that you're safe. We both are".

    "Alright, I trust you".

    After a couple more minutes, Crowley joins them in the living room.

    "You can go now, don't let the water get cold".

    "Thank you" they respond, still somewhat apprehensive.

    They hear the bathroom door closing soon after.

    "I messed up... Didn't I?" Aziraphale whispers "They have been worried about me for all this time...".

    "You two have a lot to talk about. But before that, you should take the horse to the stables. I'll have a warm bath for you too once you get back".

    "You don't mind staying here with Muriel? I know it's-".

    "It's alright. I won't eat them" Crowley says jokingly.

    Aziraphale lets out a faint smile and hugs him.

    "Thank you, dear".

Author's note

    Here's chapter 25 of "The Serpent's carnations"! Muriel has finally reunited with Aziraphale. And he may become a teacher now! Do you think Gabriel will agree to this? If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 26

    After some time, the sun had set behind the rainy clouds. Aziraphale was already in a dry set of clothes and Muriel was sitting on the armchair close to the fireplace.

    "Can you come here for a second, Crowley?" he asks from his bedroom.

    Crowley slithers quietly and approaches him.

    "Do you mind helping me with this?" he asks pointing at the bandaged hand "It got wet".

    "Of course, I'll go get some clean ones".

    Aziraphale doesn't want Muriel to see the bite mark, they're already feeling scared enough. They return to the living room after finishing taking care of the hand.

    "I believe there's a lot of explaining I need to do" he says sitting on the couch.

    Crowley slithers to his lap making Muriel flinch. He could feel their fear.

    "But why don't you start by telling me why you're here?".

    "I needed to come get you. Michael has been coming to the library. Everyone knows you're missing, they're trying to use that to their advantage. I needed you to come back to the library. And I needed to know you were safe... I thought I could be too late".

    "I'm sorry for leaving you alone like that. I was going to leave tomorrow, I didn't mean to stay this long. I-" Aziraphale stops, finding it hard to pick the right words.

    He didn't leave sooner because he couldn't leave Crowley. But admitting that is still difficult. What would Muriel think if he told them the truth? Would they think he traded the library to follow a delusion? For all they know, Crowley is a monster keeping him captive. But what can he say? All the lies he could tell are worse than the truth, but why is it still hard to speak? Crowley notices his hesitation and decides to step in.

    "I kept him here" he states "But I agreed to let him leave tomorrow. That's why he took this long".

    "No, that's not the truth" Aziraphale denies "I was planning on leaving sooner. But I couldn't- I could not leave Crowley. I know it might not have been the best decision for you and the library, but it was the only decision I could make".

    "So he did not keep you here?".

    "No, he did not".

    "And you still stayed?".

    "I- It's hard to put into words. But from the beginning, I felt like there was something strange. And after a while, I realized that Crowley was not what he pretended to be. He wouldn't have stopped me from leaving. But I couldn't go. I knew I had to, but the decision kept getting harder. It was only now that I managed to pick a date to leave and make a plan".

    "A plan?".

    "Yes, about the library. I'll tell you more about it in a moment. But I need you to understand that I didn't stay here to abandon the library. That was never my intention".

    That decision still haunts him. Even if he does have a plan, it isn't bulletproof. And if it doesn't work, he'll be faced with that same dilemma. Choosing between two halves of the heart.

    "I may not fully understand why you stayed, but I trust that you did the best decision you could".

    "I did" he answers looking at Crowley with a smile.

    "That's actually very sweet" Muriel says with a happy smile on their face "I was not expecting to see you like this".

    Crowley can't avoid but look at them with a serious gaze.

    "He's still getting used to having people over" Aziraphale says.

    "I don't like surprises" Crowley adds, trying not to pass the discomfort through his voice "But you can stay here tonight if you want".

    "I don't want to intrude, I don't mind going to the inn" Muriel says, but looking out the window they see the rain still falling "But maybe it's better if I stay. Thank you".

    Crowley feels their fear slightly fading away. That's starting to be more common but he still finds it odd.

    "How have you been doing with the library? Has everything gone accordingly?".

    "Yes, everything is going as it should. I followed your directions and made sure the rules were being followed and that everything was properly registered. I even added a few events to our calendar, I hope you don't mind. They're great additions and I'm sure you would have done the same thing".

    "You seem to be doing an impeccable job".

    "I hope so".

    "Have you had any trouble?".

    "Well... Michael has visited a couple of times. But I remember seeing you every time they came and I just did the same. I tried not to give them any room to cause trouble".

    "Thank you, Muriel. You seem very proud of your work".

    "Oh, I wouldn't say that I'm proud. I'm just happy everything went well while you were away".

    "Speaking of that, I believe it's a good time to talk about that other thing" Aziraphale continues nervously.

    "The plan?" Muriel asks.

    "Precisely. You know our project with the schools?".

    "Yes, of course".

    "Well, there's a school in the town down the street and I believe they'll want to be included".

    "That's wonderful! Did you take care of the details already?".

    "Not yet. I didn't have the official documents to give them and they still had to discuss the matter. But there was already something they said they would need. And I thought I might be able to help...".

    "What is it that they need?".

    "They would need another teacher at their school. I... I offered to stay".

    "I don't understand... How would you take care of the library and be a teacher here too?".

    "I would have to step away from the library" Aziraphale says with pain in his voice "It may be too much to ask but you'd be the one in charge there. I will still help the best I can, we can exchange weekly letters and I'll visit".

    "I don't know if I can do it. And even if I could, I don't know if Gabriel would approve".

    "Don't worry about Gabriel, don't worry about anyone but yourself for a second. Do you think you could do it?".

    Muriel takes a few seconds to analyze the offer. They have been alone at the library for some time and they managed. It's a good thing they're organized. But it's a lot of work, that's why they got hired in the first place.

    "I don't know how long I would be about to manage. Even if you help me with the letters, it would be hard".

    "I understand that perfectly, I don't want you to be alone there. I know how bad it can be" Aziraphale says with a laugh, trying to hide his sadness.

    He had been alone there for so long before hiring Muriel, it consumed him. Even with all his love for the library, it was so much to handle alone. He does not wish that on anyone.

    "I was actually thinking about hiring someone to help you. The same way you helped me".

    "That would be helpful".

    "Do you think it would be enough?".

    "We would still need to find someone trustworthy and train them. And see if Gabriel agrees, of course. And I still have a lot to learn if you're not going to be there every day... I don't know" Muriel says sadly.

    "I'm sorry, it's a lot to think about at the moment. You've been through a lot and should get some rest. Take your time to process everything. We can talk more on another occasion".

    "Thank you, Mr. Fell".

    He smiles at them and gets up from the couch. Crowley sees him walk into his room quietly.

    "Have you been nice to him?" Muriel asks softly.

    "I've been trying my best" he answers thinking about all the moments he wasn't particularly nice "I... I know we didn't meet in the best way. I know I scared you. I'm sorry".

    "Oh... Thank you" they say with a smile "You don't seem as scary as you did before".

    "I'll let you think about everything. If you need anything just let us know".

    Crowley leaves Muriel alone and slithers to Aziraphale's bedroom.

    "Hey, are you alright?" he asks softly.

    "I am, jolly good".

    Crowley sees him packing his things with shaky hands, unable to look back at him. He tried to smile but his face wouldn't allow it. Without saying another word, Crowley makes his way towards him. He slithers onto of hours bag and looks at him.

    "Don't look at me like that" Aziraphale asks in a whisper "Please don't...".

    They stay quiet for a moment before Crowley starts to slither around Aziraphale. It took him a few seconds to move, but eventually, he held Crowley close too.

    "Tell me, what do you need me to do?".

    "This, just stay like this please. Just for a moment".

    "All the time that you need".

    Crowley feels Aziraphale's embrace tighten as he fails to compose himself.

    "I had Muriel worried sick... I don't know how I can make it up for them".

    "They don't seem upset with you. But you two will have a few days before you arrive. I'm sure you'll have time to talk, you're good at doing that and fixing things".

    "Thank you, dear".

    "Now just take a deep breath. I'll start working on dinner".

    Aziraphale smiles feeling calmer and Crowley leans his forehead against his face.

    "I'll be there in a second".

    "Take your time".

    Aziraphale feels Crowley slithering away and looks down at his bag. He doesn't know what Gabriel will decide, but he can make sure Muriel has everything they need. He can train them. Hire help. Organize their letters, when they'll happen, and what matters will be discussed in them. Muriel is perfectly capable, they just need to make sure they feel confident. And if it all works out, there's a good chance Gabriel will approve. He finishes packing his things and leaves the room. To his surprise, Muriel is no longer on the couch, but there's chatter coming from the kitchen. He gets closer and sees both Crowley and Muriel cooking together.

    "It's nice to see you two getting along".

    "They wanted to help so I'm letting them cut the vegetables. They do it better than me anyway".

    "Thank you, Muriel" Aziraphale says with a smile "But I like your vegetables too, dear".

    Almost instinctively, he leans closer to Crowley, who looks at him with some nervousness in his eyes. Aziraphale finds it odd, he wasn't like that when they talked in the bedroom. It might all be because of Muriel's presence. They aren't the type to be rude in the slightest, but he knows Crowley well enough to see two reasons for his uneasiness.

    "There you go, everything's ready" they state with a smile, bringing the two of them out of their trance "Now we just have to wait for them to cook".

    "Right, thanks" Crowley responds.

    "Let's set the table. Take these plates and I'll be right there with the cups".

    Muriel leaves the kitchen and Aziraphale looks at Crowley.

    "Are you alright?" he whispers.

    "Yeah, I'm good".

    "I know it's a lot to have them here. If you need some space, we'll give it to you".

    "Mr. Fell, do you have the cups?" Muriel interrupts.

    "I do, yes, I'll be right there" he turns back to Crowley with a soft smile and whispers "Just let me know what you need. I'm here for you".

    He nods and Aziraphale kisses his forehead before leaving with the cups. Crowley stays alone in the kitchen thinking. Time is growing shorter with every second. He just wanted to spend the night with Aziraphale. Have a chat like they always do, drink their tea, and sleep under the warm blankets. It's the last night they'll have like that for now. But now Muriel is there. Crowley isn't mad at them. He might think he is at least a little bit, but in truth, he's just upset about the whole situation and it's easier to blame someone. He hopes he can still have some time with Aziraphale before going to sleep.

    Crowley barely touched the small amount of food on his plate. He didn't want to eat in front of the visitor. He zoned out during dinner but snapped back after Muriel said they'd like to sleep on the couch. Crowley left the table with the excuse of getting the place ready for them. Aziraphale noticed his tense demeanor but at that moment the best he could do was to continue dining as if nothing was wrong. After they were done, he said it would be best if they went to be.

    "We'll have a long journey ahead of us tomorrow. We should get a good night's sleep".

    "I hope it isn't raining tomorrow at least".

    "The rain doesn't seem to be getting stronger, it should pass during the night".

    "Thank you again for dinner" Muriel says seeing Crowley slither to the hallway "Good night Mr. Crowley".

    "Night" he answers without looking back.

    "Would you like some tea?".

    "Oh, that would be nice, thank you, Mr. Fell".

    "You can get comfortable, I'll bring you some in a minute".

    Aziraphale heads to the kitchen and starts to prepare his usual tea. While waiting for the water to boil, he gets some food on a plate for Crowley.

    "Here you go" he says handing out a teacup to Muriel "Good night dear".

    "Good night Mr. Fell".

    He smiles and walks towards the bedroom. He looks around to find Crowley. He was hiding under the covers with only his nose out. Aziraphale gently closes the door and sits next to him.

    "I noticed you didn't eat earlier. I brought you some food if you'd like".

    He sees Crowley's tongue flicker and soon after he moves his head out of the covers. They sit quietly as Crowley eats and Aziraphale enjoys his tea.

    "I'm sorry I didn't eat much before".

    "You have nothing to apologize for. But I didn't want you to go to bed hungry".

    They stay in silence for a few more seconds. They both wanted to enjoy these last moments before being apart, but with their hearts racing the words vanished from their minds.

    "Would you like to do something before going to sleep? I'm not sure if you had anything in mind before... The plans shifted".

    "I just wanted it to be like normal one last time before you go. But even if Muriel wasn't here, it wouldn't have been like the other nights, would it?".

    "I'm afraid not. It's not possible to ignore what will happen tomorrow. But that doesn't mean we can't make the best of it. We can chat until we're too tired to speak. We can read your favorite parts of the book again. I can hold you close while you fall asleep. So let's just be... Us".

    "Us?".

    "Yes, just us".

    Crowley looks up to him and slithers closer for a hug. They held each other quietly, it was the only thing they could do for a few minutes. They started talking during their embrace until they were having one of their long conversations. It lasted until the late hours of the night, but they started to get tired.

    "I think you should get some sleep" Crowley says after seeing Aziraphale yawn.

    "I believe you're right. Let me just change clothes really quickly".

    As he gets up from the bed, Crowley hides under the covers again. His heart was beating fast, but not just because of Aziraphale's statement. There was something he wanted to do but gathering the courage was harder than he imagined. He feels Aziraphale getting into bed beside him.

    "Are you comfortable dear?".

    "Yeah" Crowley says a bit nervous "Hey, before you actually go to sleep, do you mind if we do something first?".

    "What is it?".

    "Just- just sit for a moment. And close your eyes please".

    "Alright" Aziraphale agrees "Like this?".

    "Yes, that's perfect. Just promise you won't open your eyes".

    "You're scaring me Crowley" he says with a chuckle.

    Crowley knew he wasn't scared though.

    "Please, can you promise?".

    "Yes, of course" he answers composing himself "I promise I won't open my eyes".

    Aziraphale stays quiet trying to understand what was about to happen. He couldn't hear anything, but he felt Crowley slithering on top of his legs like he tends to do. But something strange happened. He was unsure of what it was but he could feel it. It was only when he felt two arms slowly embracing his torso that he realized.

    "Crowley" he exhales in surprise.

    "Don't open your eyes" he responds scared "I don't want you to look at me".

    "I won't".

    He can feel Crowley's arms shaking.

    "Can you hug me please...?" he whispers.

    "I don't want to hurt you, your skin-".

    "Please Aziraphale" he begs.

    His arms tremble until they're embracing Crowley. He did not open his eyes, but he could feel Crowley's heartbeat. His skin was cold. His hair was long. Aziraphale tried not to drag his hands across his skin too hard, he could feel him flinch with the pain, trying to control it. Crowley felt his skin aching with every gentle touch. It felt like burning. But he didn't want it to end. He wanted to be close to Aziraphale despite the pain, but the part that hurt more was not feeling his tight embrace. He knew he was holding back and Crowley did not have the strength to ask him for more. He couldn't ask him to do something that would hurt him. For now, this is how close they can get.

    "I promise to hug you again like this another day" Crowley says with pain in his voice "It will be better".

    "It's perfect. All your hugs are perfect. I'll miss them so much".

    "I'll miss you too".

    They hold onto each other not paying attention to the time. Aziraphale eventually feels Crowley changing in his arms, forming a more familiar form.

    "You can open your eyes again".

    He does so but tears block his vision. He brings his hands to Crowley's face and notices he's also struggling to keep his eyes from crying.

    "Thank you" he whispers.

    "Thank you, dear".

    They hug again, like they usually do, and some minutes later find a comfortable place in bed to sleep.

Author's note

    Here's chapter 26 of "The Serpent's carnations"! It's their last night together, at least for now. What do you think will happen to these two once they're separated? If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 27

    Crowley wakes up during the night and hears Aziraphale mumbling something. He closes his eyes again and tries to decipher the words. He was finding it hard until he heard his name.

    "Crowley", as clear as day.

    Was Aziraphale calling for him? Dreaming about him? Talking about him in his sleep?

    "Crowley" he hears again.

    Should he answer? No, he's not actually speaking to him, he's sleeping.

    "Crowley" one more time.

    Aziraphale was indeed dreaming about him. And due to the whimsical nature of dreaming, he could see what reality hasn't shown him yet. In that realm, he could see Crowley. Not the snake he met and grew fond of, that's not who was standing before him. It was a person. Or what should look like a person. A vision that could only be interpreted as a human by the dreamer. It was Crowley, Aziraphale could feel it. Not knowing what his appearance truly was, Aziraphale's brain filled in the blanks with the emotions he feels towards Crowley. He had long hair draping down his shoulders. It was red. Then orange. Then a warm brown. It kept fluctuating through different shades of ginger hair, some more natural than others. His body was shining like water reflecting light. Different tones of pastel colors emanated from his skin. They looked warm but Aziraphale knew that was not the case. His shapes weren't solid, they were a mere idea. But even with such an ethereal presence, Aziraphale could see a person. Crowley. It was him. The only thing he could not see were his eyes. They were closed.

    Aziraphale reaches out to him. He holds his hands gently and feels a smile forming on Crowley's face. His face was a mystery, one that could only happen in a dream. There was nothing there but light, and yet Aziraphale knew his eyes were closed and his lips formed a smile. He touched his face, knowing it was covered in freckles, but couldn't interpret the shapes he felt. All he knew was that they were Crowley's. After some time, Aziraphale sees his eyes slowly opening. Those he recognized. Yellow and shiny. He sees small scales appearing on his face. Dark patches start forming on his skin. A vision that would turn anyone else's dream into a nightmare. But not Aziraphale. He feels Crowley slithering around him and embraces him. He kept shifting in front of his eyes between these two forms. Aziraphale kept on holding him close. He could feel Crowley's hair, his scales, his smile, his teeth. There was nothing he couldn't love about him, even his dreams knew it. And Crowley could feel it too.

    He felt Aziraphale's heart beating fast, but he wasn't anxious. He had a subtle smile on his lips as he uttered bits and pieces of words. His arms were holding onto Crowley who leaned close to try and hear better. He could sense Aziraphale's feelings growing bigger. Brighter. Stronger. How strange that a dream had that power.

    "I hope I can feel you dreaming about me when you're away" Crowley wishes.

    The sun rises behind the clouds the following morning. Luckily, it wasn't raining anymore. Aziraphale wakes up due to the light and feels Crowley surrounding him. His dream was hard to wake up from. He couldn't stay with Crowley in that place forever. It was not real. But he can't help but smile. He's still with Crowley. He has time. Not as much as he wishes for, but he won't complain. He'll take every second he can get.

    "I can see you're awake" whispers Crowley.

    "Good morning dear" Aziraphale says.

    "Morning" Crowley responds leaning his face against Aziraphale.

    "Have you been awake for long?".

    "Yeah, a few hours".

    "Oh Crowley, you barely slept" he comments worried "You could've waken me if something was troubling you".

    "Nothing was wrong, I'll get some sleep later anyway. I was just... Listening to you talk. You looked so happy while sleeping, I couldn't stop looking".

    Aziraphale's face blushes as he remembers his dream.

    "What did I say?" he asks hesitantly.

    "Not much that I could understand. But I kept hearing you calling my name".

    "That makes sense, I was dreaming about you after all".

    They lock eyes for a moment. Aziraphale smiles and Crowley tries to hide his face.

    "What was the dream about?".

    "It was about us. Together".

    "Together?".

    "Yes, like this".

    Aziraphale wraps his arms around Crowley and leans closer to him.

    "It was perfect" he whispers with a smile.

    Crowley holds him closer too and closes his eyes. He too would use the word perfect to describe Aziraphale's embrace. Maybe that's why he's going to miss him so much. Aziraphale kisses his face and stretches.

    "How about we get some breakfast?".

    "I'll start making coffee while you change".

    "Thank you dear".

    "Do you want me to wake Muriel?".

    "No, don't worry about them. I'll be there in a second".

    "Alright".

    Crowley slithers to the kitchen and starts to prepare their breakfast. He also separates some food for Aziraphale to take with him. Some biscuits they still had around, fruit, bread and jam. It reminded him of their picnic. He looked outside, it wasn't sunny but it wasn't raining either.

    "Good morning Muriel" Crowley hears in the living room, followed by a mumble "I'll be with Crowley in the kitchen, feel free to join us for breakfast when you're ready".

    "I'll be up in a second" they mutter trying to open their eyes.

    Aziraphale walks towards Crowley and looks at what he's doing.

    "I put some snacks here for your trip. You should also take some bandages, I don't want your hand to get worse".

    "Thank you, dear".

    They sit at the kitchen table. Or more precisely, Aziraphale sits in one of the chairs and Crowley slithers around him looking forward to his attention. He gets some gentle strokes on his face and closes his eyes.

    "Good morning" Muriel says walking into the kitchen "I'm sorry for interrupting".

    "Oh, nonsense dear. Come take a seat".

    Crowley opens his eyes once more and sees them sitting with a smile.

    "I was thinking we should go to the stables after breakfast. We need to get Cupperty and I need to find a horse for myself as well".

    "I was thinking the same thing. I hope Cupperty spent a good night after being in the rain".

    "I'm sure the stables were comfortable. And did you sleep well? Are you feeling alright?".

    "Yes, I don't think the rain was enough to make me sick".

    "I'm glad to hear".

    The breakfast plates were put away. The three of them left the house heading to town. Crowley was apprehensive, but he didn't want to leave Aziraphale's side. They didn't pass by many people this time, definitely not by anyone wanting to spark a conversation. When they reached the stables Crowley stopped.

    "Are you alright dear?".

    "I don't think- I can wait here" he states "It's better that way. Animals don't really like meeting a giant snake. Can't blame them really, it's their instinct".

    "I don't think there would be a problem. Are you sure you want to stay out here alone?".

    "I can stay if you'd like" Muriel says with a shy smile "As long as Mr. Fell brings back Cupperty, I don't need to go inside".

    "How does that sound?" Aziraphale asks looking at Crowley for some sort of answer.

    "I guess that would work" he responds slithering into a comfortable position under the sun.

    Aziraphale enters the stables and sees the same man who greeted him the previous evening. After a short exchange of words, they head inside to see the horses. He immediately notices Cupperty, who seems alright. They walk a bit further to the stalls in the back. They had the names of the horses that belonged to the establishment. Aziraphale stopped in front of one stall after catching a glimpse of a beautiful horse.

    "I'm sorry, I know she's a show stopper, but I don't think you should take her" the owner advised "She can be quite a handful".

    "Why is that?".

    "She has seen better days. One of the fastest horses we have here. I would only rent her to the best horse-riders. But a couple of years ago there was... An incident".

    "Oh no, is she alright?".

    "She's as good as new, nothing happened to her. But she attacked a man. Kicked him so hard he broke a few ribs. It was hard to rent her after that, and it's also risky to let out a 'dangerous' horse. I take her out on the corral to let her run, it's safe there. I don't know what I'm supposed to do with her anymore".

    Aziraphale stares at the horse and then glances at the name tag. "Bentley". The name matches her perfectly.

    "How much?".

    "What do you mean how much?".

    "If she lets me, I'd want to take her with me. I promise I will take perfectly good care of her. She'll be returned safe and sound. So, how much?".

    The man scratches his head thinking about what he should do. Bentley isn't making him much money since the incident, if any money at all, but he wonders if this soft-looking man will be able to handle her.

    "How about we take her outside. If you can put a saddle on her and ride her, I'll let you take her".

    Aziraphale agrees and the man opens the stall door. Bentley turns to him and blows some air out of her nostrils.

    "It's alright" Aziraphale says approaching her carefully.

    He stops after Bentley takes a step back.

    "I wouldn't come closer if I were you" the stable's owner advises.

    Aziraphale doesn't listen to him, but he doesn't get closer either. Instead, he takes a step back. Bentley looks at him with curiosity and as he gets further away she takes a step forward. He can't help but smile and lead her to the door. She follows him slowly, paying attention to everything. As they get out of the stall, Aziraphale picks up the saddle and looks at Bentley who nickers softly. Almost like an old habit, she turns slightly to better allow Aziraphale to place the saddle on her back. He does so and strokes her neck.

    "There you go" he says smiling "You're doing great".

    She nods her head, almost like she understood every word he said. He also places the bridle on her, and to the owner's surprise, she lets him do it without much hesitation.

    "Should we go outside?" Aziraphale asks facing the man.

    He stumbles upon his words but leads them both to the corral in the back of the stable.

    After a couple of minutes, Bentley is trotting with Aziraphale. She starts slowly, it's been quite some time since she had someone riding her. But soon the trot turns into a canter and then a gallop. Aziraphale knew she wasn't going at her full speed, after all, she was one of the fastest horses there. But he didn't want to push her, at least not then and there. The corral was nice, but the space didn't allow her to go much faster without bumping into the fence.

    "Mr. Fell!" he hears.

    He looks to the side and sees Muriel waving from the outside of the corral. He smiles and leads Bentley to that side.

    "Is that the horse you're taking?" they ask.

    "Yes, I believe it is. Where's Crowley by the way?".

    "Oh, he's right over here. He just doesn't want to scare the horse".

    "I don't want the horse to toss you to the ground because of me" he hisses.

    "I'm sure she won't, dear. But don't worry, I'll be right there in a second".

    He returns inside and walks alongside Bentley.

    "So, how much?" he asks at the front desk holding both Bentley and Cupperty.

    "I don't even know how much to charge for her. How long will you need her?".

    "I can't say it precisely, but no more than a month. If I'm not able to return her myself, I'll make sure someone will bring her back safely".

    While Aziraphale finished his deal, Crowley enjoyed the sun.

    "Have you ever been on a horse?" Muriel asks him.

    "No" he answers not even looking at them.

    "Oh" they respond with an embarrassed chuckle "I guess I should have predicted that. Maybe one day you could try it?".

    Crowley takes a deep breath and Aziraphale walks out of the stables right after.

    "Cupperty!" Muriel exclaims and walks towards their horse.

    "And this is Bentley".

    "Wait a second, I know that horse" Crowley says "She kicked Astur this one time, it was amazing".

    "Oh, was it Astur that she kicked? That's barely a reason to keep her locked away".

    "They should have given her an award".

    She looks at Crowley, who's a few steps away, and blows at him.

    "I think she likes you".

    Crowley could feel that there was no fear coming from Bentley. She was curious about him. He still didn't want to risk scaring her.

    "I'm glad she isn't trying to stomp on me, but I'd rather keep my distance".

    "That's alright, I can walk in the middle of you two".

    On their way back, Crowley takes glimpses of Bentley. Her dark fur was beautiful and her eyes looked full of joy. He wonders if she would let him get closer. It's not something he's willing to test, having a horse hoove on the face doesn't sound like a fun time. But maybe one day he would be able to ride a horse. Perhaps he'll try it when he's transformed.

    Everything was ready. Both Muriel and Aziraphale had their bags. They had food. The horses were prepared. Muriel was holding onto them while Aziraphale stood in front of Crowley.

    "I guess this is it" he says.

    "I guess so".

    "I know you might not be able to write back to me, but I'll be sending letters".

    "I'll find a way".

    "Is there anything you'd like me to bring when I return? Or something I can have delivered here?".

    "You don't have to bring me anything".

    "Will you be alright? I don't want you to go out of your way to get into trouble".

    "I won't. I've lived for decades on my own and I managed. Nothing bad will happen".

    Aziraphale takes a deep breath and gives him a sad smile.

    "I know I worry a lot. It will just be hard not knowing how you're doing. I'll come back as soon as I can".

    "I know you will".

    Aziraphale hugs him tightly. He has read countless goodbyes in his novels. Everyone always seemed to know what to say. But for once, he can't find the right words. They don't come out.

    "It will just be for a little while. I'll be back in no time" he tries to convince himself.

    But Crowley can already feel that he misses him. He feels Aziraphale's lips against his forehead one more time and watches him walk away. He watches as he rides Bentley up the road. Soon they were out of his sight. He can feel the small sounds around him getting muffled. He couldn't move. He stayed still without realizing the time flying by. A thought echoes through his mind.

    "What now?".

    He looks back at the empty house behind him. The same house he always lived in. He's alone in there again. He slowly slithers until he finds Aziraphale's bed. He finds a place under the covers. It was cold now but he could still smell Aziraphale. His mind was numb, not knowing how to feel or what to do. There was nothing for him to do. No one to read to him. No one to talk to. No one to hug. No one to eat with. To walk with. To sleep with. To live with. No one. He closes his eyes. There's nothing for him to do, so he gives in to the cold and exhaustion and falls asleep. He secretly wishes he could dream of Aziraphale, just like he was a few hours ago. But what he dreams about is not up to him. He knows his dreams rarely have nice experiences waiting for him. But if there's a change he'll see Aziraphale, he'll take it. Unfortunately, Crowley isn't particularly lucky. He wakes up some hours later breathing heavily. He struggles to slither out of the covers but once he's out he starts to slow down his breathing.

    "Fuck" he grunts.

    He looks out the window and sees the sun setting. It would be a better use of his time to find something to eat and get the fireplace ready for the colder hours of the day. Once he's neither hungry nor cold, he looks deeply into the flames in front of him. He knows Aziraphale will get to an inn a few towns over soon. Crowley decides to stay awake during the night.

    "Maybe he'll dream again".

Author's note

    Here's chapter 27 of "The Serpent's carnations"! I did some research about horses for this one, I hope you like Bentley!! And on a sadder note, the two are now apart. When do you think they'll be back together? Just a quick note, I'll be taking a break to enjoy the holidays so the next chapter will come out next year! I'm aiming to be back at the end of January or at the beginning of February at most. If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter and a couple of extra drawings you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you again for reading and what do you think will happen next?

Quick Update

    Hi dear readers, I hope you're enjoying the story so far. I wanted to make this short update for you guys. I'll delete it in a few days and write it at the end of the previous chapter. For more updates, you can check my YouTube community tab and other socials by clicking here. 

    Long story short, "The Serpent's carnations" will have to stay paused for longer than I predicted. This doesn't mean I'll abandon the story, I love how it's going and there's still much more to tell. I won't leave this project unfinished. But due to some personal problems, I'm unable to write and draw right now. I hope you can understand. If there's someone in the world who wants to finish this story it's me, I don't give up on it. But I also can't give up on myself. I'll leave the story on pause until I'm able to come back. 

    Thank you for reading this update. I know it's probably not what you would want to read but I didn't want to leave you guys without any answers. I promise to come back and write about these two silly idiots. In the meantime, I'll keep this update here. I'll remove it when I return with the story. But for now, stay safe out there! I hope to write for you soon ❤️

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 28

    "You've been awfully quiet" Muriel points out "Would you like to stop? We won't get to the next town today anyway, might as well stay here and find something to do".

    "Yes, that sounds lovely. But would it be alright if I took Bentley for a run before leaving her in the stables? I feel like she needs it".

    "Of course, I'll leave our things at the inn while you do that".

    "Thank you dear, I'll meet you there. It won't take long" Aziraphale responds with a smile.

    They part ways as Aziraphale follows a road to the outside of the town. There was a big open space, just a dirt road across the grass. Without hesitation, he signals Bentley to run. She does so, going faster with every step. Aziraphale looks forward while the sun is starting to set but his vision starts to get cloudy. He holds onto Bentley until she stops. He closes his eyes for a moment.

    "You remind me of him, you know?" he asks softly "He's also confined in a small space, smaller than he deserves. All because people fear him too. It only got worse after he caused actual harm. I can't blame him though. I'm sure you also had a good reason to kick Hastur. But neither of you should be locked away. You aren't monsters. All it takes is a little kindness to see that".

    Bentley nickers softly and Aziraphale leaves her back.

    "Let's go back, I don't want Muriel to worry about me any more than they already have".

    They walk side by side up the path they came from. It was a quiet night, only their steps could be heard. As they get closer to town, he feels his nerves rising. He's been avoiding some topics of conservation the whole day. He tells himself that Muriel needs some time, but that's only an excuse. He's the one afraid of approaching some of the more sensitive topics. But maybe he'll find the courage and give them some well-deserved explanations. He approaches the stables and walks in.

    "Good evening sir. How can I assist you today?" asks the lady working there.

    "She needs a place to sleep tonight" Aziraphale responds.

    "Of course. And what's the name of this lovely guest?".

    "Her name is Bentley".

    "Alright Bentley, let's get you a good stall".

    "Thank you. I'll be back to pick her up tomorrow morning".

    "Don't worry, she's in good hands".

    The sun was fully set when Aziraphale met Muriel at the front of the inn.

    "I talked with the owner and he suggested a nice place for dinner. But we can check some of the stores before they close for the day".

    "That sounds nice. Did you spot something nice when we passed by?".

    "I’d like to get a new notebook, but there were a few other places I’d like to check out if that’s alright".

    "It surely is. Lead the way then" he says with a soft smile.

    There were still a few people around the streets, but most were heading home to hide from the cold. Muriel goes from store to store while Aziraphale follows them, mostly keeping to himself. After a couple more stops, something caught his attention. It was a simple pair of earrings with a small snake on each one.

    "I didn't know you had your ears pierced, Mr. Fell".

    "Oh, they're not for me. I was thinking of Crowley, I want to get him something, but I don't think he has his ears pierced".

    "I don't think he has any ears" Muriel points out.

    "Yes, that's what I meant" he responds embarrassed.

    For a moment, he forgot that he was the only one aware of Crowley's curse. It may be best to keep it like that, at least for now. Aziraphale knows it's not his place to share that secret, not without Crowley's consent. He follows Muriel to the place where they want to dine. It was warm inside and they managed to find a free table away from the loudest groups of people. A waitress meets them shortly after they sit down, and soon, they're left waiting for their food to get ready.

    "Mr. Fell, can I ask you something?".

    "Of course, dear. What is it?".

    "I know you've been avoiding this since last night but can we talk about the plan?".

    "I wanted to give you time to think without pestering you too much. But we can talk about it".

    "Great" Muriel says with a relieved smile "Because I have a lot of questions and I wasn't sure you wanted to answer them".

    They indeed had a plethora of questions regarding that issue. Aziraphale was not surprised by that. He has known Muriel for years now, he knows how curious they get and how thorough they are when they want to understand something. Some of the questions were a tad sensitive to answer, but regardless, he was happy to help Muriel get their mind clearer.

    "Thank you for your patience" Muriel says when they're back at the inn "I know I can overthink a little when it comes to changes".

    "It's alright dear, you can ask any question you have. I know I came up with the plan, but I won't go through with it unless you agree".

    "Thank you, Mr. Fell. I'm feeling more confident now, but I do have something else I'd like to ask".

    Aziraphale looks at them with a smile, waiting for what seems to be the last question of the night.

    "Well, I'm not sure if I should be asking this. You don't have to answer if you don't want to. But why do you want to stay with Crowley? I don't mean to be rude, I'm just curious, that's all".

    Aziraphale looks down and tries to find the proper words to use.

    "I'm sure it might sound like a rushed decision. But Crowley has shown me how wonderful he is. He doesn’t deserve to be alone. So I'll do my best to spend time with him. I want to help him. To make him happy. To bring him peace and quiet".

    Muriel waits for a few seconds before responding.

    "What about you?" they continue "Will staying with Crowley bring you happiness and peace?".

    Aziraphale looks down and smiles. All he can think about is sitting on that couch in front of the fireplace with a book in his hands and Crowley resting on his lap.

    "It will" he answers gently.

    "That’s actually really sweet" Muriel says smiling "I guess you always liked reading those romance novels, I’m glad you get to live one".

    Aziraphale’s face turns red as soon as he hears that last sentence.

    "It’s not- nothing of that sort" he stumbles embarrassed "Crowley and I are not friends. I mean- Friends! We’re friends. Just friends".

    "That’s just as good!" they respond, a bit oblivious but happy regardless of the nature of their relationship "Let’s make sure we go through with the plan then".

    "Thank you, Muriel. We should get some rest now, it's getting late".

    "Good night!".

    "Good night, dear".

    He gets in his room and takes a deep breath. His heart is still a bit agitated from that last conversation. He prepares a warm bath to relax before bed and changes the bandages on his hand. Aziraphale can’t help but wonder if Crowley sensed that moment.

    "I know you can't hear my thoughts" he whispers, a bit relieved that Crowley doesn’t possess such ability "But I hope you know I'm thinking about you".

    He has a hard time falling asleep that night, as he always does when he travels. This time he misses more than just his warm cup of tea. He closes his eyes but his mind stays in a perpetual state of anticipation. Almost like he was waiting for Crowley to slither next to him at any moment.

    Crowley fell asleep in front of the fireplace that night while contemplating Aziraphale's emotions. He was calm but focused, trying to spot any difference in his feelings. He could almost feel his heart beating with every slight change. His emotions felt warm and comforting. When Crowley woke up, the fireplace had burned out a few hours ago. He slithers off the couch and starts the day like he used to. He ate something since he was hungry and went to the garden. His routine had been the same for years, but it felt empty this time. He tries to shake off that thought but ends up lying on the grass feeling numb.

    "This sucks" he states annoyed.

    He tries to think of something to do. Aziraphale isn't there to keep him company and there's only so much he can do in the garden. He had already spent some time straightening the crooked leaves and removing unwanted sprouts. The garden looked perfect, even to Crowley's high standards. He thinks for a bit and looks at the house again. Suddenly, an idea reappears in his mind. He's unsure if he should do it, or may not be the right time yet. But he slithers back inside the house either way. He grabs the mirror hanging on the bathroom wall and takes it to his bedroom.

    "It's alright, how bad can it be really?" he reassures himself "I just don't know what I look like and my skin is probably still burning. Could be worse, right?".

    After a prolonged stare, Crowley takes a deep breath and transforms. He knows he looks human, he can feel it, he's as human as he can be. But he still can't gather the courage to open his eyes. What if he looks and it isn't true? No, that can't be the case. He can feel the pain on his raw skin. It surely is healing but it should take a little while for that throbbing sensation to completely disappear.

    Crowley just sits on his mattress, almost holding his breath. He didn't know how long he could hold that form. In a way, he just wanted to turn back to being a snake. He's used to it by now and he learned to enjoy it. But he also wanted to keep going, to finally meet the version of himself that Aziraphale helped return. But how eyes are shut and won't open. The frustration starts bubbling up inside him.

    "Stupid idea" he growls.

    Crowley's ready to give up, but his heart tightens with the idea.

    "What would you say if you were here?" he whimpers "If you saw me like this after all you did to help me...".

    He can imagine Aziraphale's reaction, the disappointment and anger in his voice, but Crowley shakes that thought off his head immediately. It's not real. Aziraphale would never. If he were there, he would probably hold Crowley's hands until he's ready to look, regardless of how long that would take. He takes a deep breath and tries to ease his nerves. It would certainly be nice to have Aziraphale present during that moment, but Crowley wants to work on this alone.

    After a few quiet minutes, he slowly brings his shaky hands to his face. It's hard to control the finer movements of his fingers. It has been a while since he last used them, after all. He frowns as he tries to get control over his body. Finally, he touches his face. At first with just the tips of his fingers, then with the whole hand. It was different than what he remembered. Instead of round, childlike features, he could feel sharper angles. He could also feel a beard, it's not something he would have guessed but he had already noticed it. But it was not time to open his eyes yet, he wasn't ready.

    "Next time" he mumbles after a while and transforms back.

    Once again, he lights up the fireplace and gets comfortable under a blanket. Sleeping tends to come easily on colder days, even in front of the fireplace, so Crowley was not surprised to fall asleep soon after lying down. This would become a habit. Eating, taking care of the garden, sleeping in front of the fireplace and finding a few moments of courage a day to transform. But still, he has no success in opening his eyes.

    Aziraphale and Muriel finally arrive at their town. After a quick goodbye, he leaves Bentley at the stables for the night. A few minutes later, Aziraphale finds himself entering his place. It was cold inside and a fine layer of dust had formed on every surface. He puts down his bags and closes his eyes. It's not his first time returning home after traveling, but it definitely feels like a new experience. After getting his tired self to lock the door, he draws a warm bath. Aziraphale lets out a smile as he rests mostly submerged in the warm water.

    "I should let Crowley know I arrived" Aziraphale thinks "And I need to send Anathema the proper paperwork for the school. And get everything ready to speak with Gabriel tomorrow...".

    As he lists all the items on his mental to-do list, his smile starts to fade away slowly. The doubts start to linger in the back of his mind again. All the bad outcomes of everything he has to do. He takes a deep breath and leans his head back. His gaze slowly drifts to his bandaged hand and his demeanor changes almost immediately. He focuses on finishing his bath, and after that, he starts brewing some tea. While Aziraphale waits, he cleans his wound.

    "There, all done" he says after tying the last bandage "I can do it, just need to take it one thing at a time".

    After a warm cup of tea, he feels ready to go to bed, but falling asleep continues to be a challenge. He rolls around in bed but ends up staring at the ceiling. He mumbles some incoherent, sleep-deprived words and drags his hands across his face. Finally, an idea pops up in his mind. He gets up momentarily and returns soon after with an extra pillow. He falls back on the mattress and returns to a comfortable sleeping position, this time holding that pillow in a hug. It was cold, resembling Crowley even more than expected.

    "I hope you're alright, dear" he thinks.

    The next day, Muriel arrives at the library to start their shift.

    "Good morning dear" Aziraphale greets after hearing them walk in.

    "Good morning Mr. Fell. What's the plan for today?".

    "Well, I was going to go meet with Gabriel, assuming that he's free. And I’m also finishing these 'hiring' signs, if you could take a look at them that would be wonderful. I think I included everything necessary, but it would be best if you checked".

    "Consider it done!".

    "Good" he says with a tired sigh "Thank you. Now, if you don't mind" he says adding a few more papers to his pile "I would like to meet with Gabriel as soon as possible".

    "Of course, do you need any help?".

    "Thank you dear, but I think I have everything I need here".

    "Well, good luck then Mr. Fell!".

    Aziraphale takes a deep breath before walking into Gabriel's office. There was no clutter in sight besides a few perfectly piled papers and a pen. Aziraphale can't help but wonder if the drawers and cabinets are as organized as the desk. Knowing Gabriel, they probably are.

    "I'm sure you know why I asked you to be here" Gabriel says walking to his chair.

    "Yes, I am well aware".

    "Care to explain to me what happened? I'm sure you must have a reason for disappearing from your job for weeks without notice".

    "Ah, yes" Aziraphale responds anxiously "You see, a few weeks ago, Muriel went on one of our usual business trips. But as you remember, it took them longer than usual and I left to find them".

    Gabriel looks at him unimpressed but Aziraphale continues.

    "When I found Muriel, they were in a small town. They told me there were a few unpredictable events during the trip that caused their delay, but that's not all! That town actually turned out to be a good candidate for our school partnership project. Muriel was trying to convince them, but in this case, I felt like it would be better if I were the one staying. They needed help and I-".

    "Aziraphale, I don't have all day. Please summarize".

    "Yes, of course. To put it shortly, that town had potential, but they were lacking some crucial elements. And I felt it was worth the time and effort".

    "Why didn't you send any letter with this information? It would have been helpful".

    "You see" Aziraphale says fidgeting with the buttons on his sleeves "That was... That was one of the problems. They didn't have a good post office installation. It's all working now. Absolutely tickidy boo".

    "So you're telling me you stayed behind to help them fit into the library's project?".

    "Precisely".

    "It surely was a risky move. But the library didn't succumb in your absence. Muriel gave me this month's report right before they left to find you and everything seemed to be up to the usual standards".

    "Yes, they did an incredible job".

    "Well, if that's all, then you're dismissed".

    "Actually, Gabriel, there's something else I need to mention".

    "Well, go on".

    "I managed to get that town to meet the required conditions, but there's one thing they still need. I think I have a solution, but it would need your approval".

    "What is it they need?".

    "A teacher".

Author's note

    "The Serpent's carnations" is finally back!! I'm so happy to return to this story with full strength to give it the attention it deserves. Thank you all for your patience during my absence ❤️ I'm feeling much better currently, and writing the next chapters has honestly helped me feel better. To make it easier on myself, I'll only be making one drawing per chapter (I'll draw my favorite scene for each one) and I'll try to upload a new chapter loosely every 2 weeks. And I can't wait to share this story with you!!

    But what were your thoughts on this chapter? Now that they're apart what do you think will happen? And we're starting to get human Crowley!! If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you so much for waiting and reading, and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 29

    Muriel patiently waits at the library. It had been a few minutes since Aziraphale returned, only to quickly grab a few documents before leaving again. They saw him from the top floor but he was too focused to lift his head, leaving Muriel unnoticed.

    "Have a nice day" Muriel says with a smile after helping someone return a book.

    Their eyes go straight to the front door, trying to see Aziraphale again. He was nowhere to be seen. They fidget with a feather pen while sitting at the front desk.

    "It must be a good sign" they murmur "It means that Gabriel didn't shut down the idea completely. It will be fine".

    Right before their lunch break, Muriel sees Aziraphale walking into the library in no rush. He softly puts the papers in their designated places while Muriel runs down the stairs.

    "How did it go?" they ask before even getting to the front desk, catching Aziraphale by surprise.

    "I'd say it went well" he reassures with a tired smile "Discussing these issues with Gabriel has always been challenging. But I was sure he would agree when he started asking questions and waiting for the answer. He gave a few conditions but nothing absurd. As long as we plan everything carefully and continue to take good care of the library, everything should be fine. He doesn't seem to care that much, only if it starts to cause trouble his way".

    "I'm glad".

    They both stay quiet for a few seconds. Muriel can't help but shift their balance from the heel of the feet to the tips of the toes. They wanted to know more, but Aziraphale seemed too tired to speak at the moment. After a short exchange of words, they both decide to continue the conversation after their lunch break. Aziraphale returns home to prepare something for lunch. Spending time with Gabriel always raises his stress levels, especially when something important is on the line. At least he was prepared. He had thought about what to say and how to say it. And it paid out, Gabriel agreed. Now they just need to set their plan into action.

    The afternoon flew by, and when they noticed, the sun had already set for that day. Aziraphale sealed a couple of letters, one with the library seal and the other with one of his personal favorites, which had a capital "A" and some flowery designs.

    "No one showed up yet" Muriel interrupts "Do you think they’re not interested?".

    "You shouldn’t worry about it, it’s only been a few hours since the 'hiring' signs have been on display across town. People will get the chance to look at them tomorrow".

    "You’re right, I’m just a bit nervous, that’s all..." they say as they pick up their jacket "Do you need anything from me before I go home?".

    "Thank you, dear, you can go. And thank you for the help too. I couldn’t possibly do this without your support".

    "Oh, it’s alright! I’m happy to help".

    "Go on then, I’ll see you tomorrow".

    They leave the library, and soon after, so does Aziraphale. He walks peacefully to the post office and sends the two letters. His face blushes as he hands out the second envelope.

    Crowley lost count of how many days passed, but it was time to buy food. He searched his house for a few minutes and found the money he had stashed decades ago. He reluctantly grabs it and slithers to town. His attitude is serious towards everyone, he can instantaneously sense the fear of everyone grow now that Aziraphale isn’t present. He doesn’t argue with the store owners this time. Crowley just quickly grabs what he needs and leaves the money at the counter before any words are said. As he’s slithering back, he hears a loud noise that piques his curiosity. He turns the corner and notices the familiar group of kids. This time they were holding their bikes, but one of them was on the ground.

    "Are you alright, Wensleydale?" Addam asks.

    "I don’t think I broke anything" he replies, picking up his glasses, still a bit shaken.

    Crowley slithers closer and Dog starts barking at him, not aggressively, just noticing his presence.

    "You kids need help?".

    "Wensleydale fell because of a rock" Brian points out as he picks up the fallen bike.

    "Did you hit your head?" Crowley asks calmly.

    "I don’t think so..." he answers nervously.

    Crowley notices the scraped knees and hands. It’s nothing too severe, it should pass in a week if he doesn’t poke at it.

    "It will bruise a little but should be alright. Are you hurt anywhere else?".

    "No, I think I’m okay".

    "Then let’s just get that cleaned. And keep a close eye on him in case he hit his head. Wait here a second".

    He slithers to the school down the street and knocks at the door. He waits a few seconds and Anathema opens the door surprised.

    "Hello Crowley" she says after the surprise wears off "Can I help you with something?".

    "Do you have bandages and water? One of your kids fell".

    "My kid? I don’t-" she looks out to the street and sees who Crowley’s talking about "Oh, my kids. Yeah, I’ll get it".

    They return to the group soon after, and Anathema starts cleaning the scraped knee while Crowley analyzes.

    "It just has to be clean, let the new blood sit there. It will close the wound".

    "I know, I know. It’s not my first time dealing with something like this" Anathema responds.

    "Just keep the bandages on if you’re playing outside, you don’t want it to get dirty. And don’t forget to switch them".

    Wensleydale gets up and shakes off the dust from his shorts.

    "Thank you" he says with a smile.

    "Are you a doctor?" Pepper asks Crowley, curious but skeptical.

    Crowley goes silent for a moment, paralyzed by that sentence. He spent the first years of his life with doctors. With time, he picked up on a few things, but he refuses to be compared to them. Not those doctors at least.

    "I’m not" he answers and leaves without saying another word.

    It had been dark outside for a couple of hours now, but it was even darker inside Crowley’s home. He didn’t light the fireplace that evening. That sentence echoed inside his mind, and many other voices joined it. A nighmarish shout contest, and all Crowley could do was keep his eyes open to see that it wasn’t real. There’s no one at the house. No one. Not anymore. He’s alone and he’s safe. But he doesn’t feel safe this time. Not as safe as he would feel if Aziraphale were next to him. He stayed in Aziraphale’s bed that night, trying desperately to grab onto those good memories they shared.

    "I wish I could dream with you" Crowley whispers, knowing nightmares were waiting for him.

    He resisted, but keeping his eyes open was proving to be difficult. Crowley fell asleep just a couple of minutes before the first signs of sunlight in the morning.

    That night, he revisited some of his dreadful memories, twisted into one another, the way only nightmares can be. But after tossing and turning in bed, a sense of peace takes over the terrors of Crowley’s past. In the blink of an eye, he sees himself in his garden. Aziraphale is there too. They’re lying under a tree. Crowley can’t understand any word Aziraphale says, all he knows is that he’s reading a book. Yet suddenly, like magic, those words become recognizable.

    "You don’t need to be afraid" Aziraphale says softly "I guarantee the story has a happy ending. We just have to keep reading".

    Like most dreams, most things are forgotten after waking up. But Crowley woke up with Aziraphale’s voice still on his mind. He opens his eyes and they quickly well up with tears. He lifts his head without saying a word and transforms right then and there. Tears start rolling down his face, not particularly sad or even nervous this time. Crowley couldn’t describe what that feeling was, not even if he knew all the words in the dictionary. It was strong, but in a peaceful way. With shaking hands, he grabs onto the bed sheet and covers his back and shoulders. He takes a deep breath and wipes his face with the back of his hand. He opens his eyes slowly and looks at the empty mattress in front of him. Then his eyes move down to his knees and then to his hands.

    "You really did it" Crowley whispers "You brought me back".

    He smiles and lets out a chuckle that shortly turns into a cry. Crowley holds onto his shoulders and leans forward with his eyes closed once more.

    "It’s real" he sobs "Thank you...".

    Carefully and slowly, Crowley walks out of the bedroom with the bed sheet still wrapped around him. He holds onto the wall as he gets used to walking again. He looked around. It was the same house he had lived in for decades, but it felt like looking at it with a fresh set of eyes. He gets to the end of the hallway and looks at the open space in front of him. His heart beats fast as he approaches the shelves next to the couch. He touches a small potted plant. The leaves felt different on his hand than they did on his scaly form. He walks to the kitchen and grabs a slice of bread. It still felt unusual to use his hands. All the intricate steps had to be thought out, they didn’t come naturally like they do to any other person. He opens the drawer and grabs a small knife. He puts it down on the counter, completely focused on his task. He reaches for the jam jar and twists the lid. It took him a few tries, but when he finally opened it, the lid fell to the floor.

    "It’s okay, I’ll pick it up after I’m done" Crowley mumbles.

    He looks to the counter once more and reaches for the knife but freezes. With his eyes wide open, he notices some scales showing on his hand and arm. He’s not used to holding this form for too long, so it will take time to get used to it. That was the true explanation, but those weren’t the words flooding Crowley’s mind.

    "I can’t do it" he thinks "Why can’t I do it?".

    With his worries rising, it became harder to keep his human form. He sees the scales spreading through his arms, covering them completely as they start to lose their shape. He takes a few steps back, almost trying to run from the curse. He can’t. It’s part of him. He trips on the bed sheet that had fallen to the floor. With no hands to help, he feels the full impact when hitting the floor. He tries to turn and kneel, but can’t. He looks down at his legs, and they’re covered in scales too, starting to fuse with each other. All Crowley can do is let out a blood-curdling cry for help. But there was no one to listen to him. No one to help. Why would anyone help?

    "Please..." he exhales.

    He stays down on the ground, his head hurting from the fall. Anyone who looked at him would probably assume he was passed out. He stayed still for hours, unable to move. He saw the daylight fade away, and the cold of the night filled the house. He didn’t move somewhere warm. He couldn’t. Occasionally, he would let out an unfazed shiver. He could hear his stomach growling, he hadn’t eaten in over a day. He still didn’t move. He didn’t want to eat.

    Another day went by. Crowley was awake but barely conscious. His eyes half-closed, looking at the same spot since he transformed. Yet something new happened, at least something new during that moment. It started to rain outside. It wasn’t a storm, just some small drops of water hitting the window. He moves for the first time. At first, just his gaze, but then he turns his head to get a better view of the window. It was dark outside, but he could see the moonlight reflected on the water rolling down the window. It still wasn’t enough to get him moving. About an hour after staring at the rain, Crowley sensed something. Some towns away, someone was dreaming about him. Aziraphale’s dream was full of passion, love and hope. Crowley doesn’t know what the dream is about, but he slowly starts to slither to the bed sheet on the kitchen floor. He wraps himself around it and closes his eyes to take it all in. Crowley feels the sun lighting the house in the morning. He opens his eyes and slowly lifts his head. He picks up the jam lid from the floor and puts it down on the counter.

    "You wouldn’t want to see me like this" Crowley thinks.

    He slowly takes the bed sheet to the bedroom and fixes the bed. He returns to the kitchen and grabs the bread slice left on the counter. It was harder now.

    "Fucking bread" Crowley mumbles as he drops it and grabs something else to nible on.

    He senses Aziraphale waking up, but all the feelings remain there, they’re just more conscious and stable now that he’s awake. Crowley decides to cook something as he’s still hungry. He didn’t give it much thought, just grabbed a bunch of things, tossed them on a tray and put it in the oven. He goes out to the garden to get some fresh air. He removes some dead leaves and unwanted sprouts before hearing bikes approaching on the road. He also hears a dog barking, making him recognize that small group.

    "Good morning, Mr Crowley" Addam greets him after stopping outside the gate.

    "Morning kids" he responds, not too excited.

    "Are you alright?" asks Wensleydale.

    "I’m great" Crowley says turning to tend to another plant.

    "We’re going to the forest over there, would you like to tag along?".

    "No, I’m good right here. But thanks".

    "See you later, then" the kids say as they continue on their adventure.

    "Crazy kids" Crowley mumbles.

    Crowley takes the tray out of the oven. The smell alone made him want to devour everything on the spot, but he knew he would get burned. He sits at the table and enjoys a plate of food, but as he’s grabbing more food from the tray, he takes a moment to think. He could try to transform, just for five minutes, or maybe even for just a couple. Or just for a bite of food. But he couldn’t bring himself to do it, not since what happened last time. He finishes his meal in silence before being interrupted by a knock on the door. He slithers closer and opens it.

    "Good afternoon" says a young man with an envelope.

    Crowley recognized him from the post office.

    "I have this letter for you".

    Crowley grabs it as his heart starts racing.

    "Thank you" he says, and Eric starts walking away.

    He slithers to the couch and opens the letter without hesitation.

    "Dear Crowley,

    Muriel and I arrived safe and sound after the trip. I have to say, Bentley is a wonderful horse. I’ve been taking her for a ride every day. I like to think that you two would get along. She’s kind and strong, just like you.

    Regarding the library, Muriel did an amazing job keeping everything running. I’m already making a list of books I’d like to read to you. And our plan is officially set in place! I spoke with Gabriel, and he agreed. We put up hiring signs across the city, we should start seeing potential employees soon.

    Crowley opens a few drawers until finding paper and a pen. He sits on the floor in front of the fireplace.

    "Haven’t written in years" he mumbles "How hard can it be?".

    Turns out, it was indeed hard. He could barely hold the pen, not with his mouth and not with his tail. At least not with the required precision. Crowley looks at Aziraphale’s letter and shakes his head with a newfound determination.

    "Just 5 minutes".

    After waiting with his eyes closed for a few anxiety-filled seconds, Crowley transforms. He holds the pen with his hand and tries to write. His handwriting was barely legible, in no way comparable to Aziraphale’s perfectly drawn cursive letters. But he managed to write a short practice sentence. He looks at it for a second and then transforms back. He can do it. He’ll just need to think about what to write.

Author's note

    And here's chapter 29 of "The Serpent's carnations"!! Crowley is having a rough return to his human form, but how do you think it will go? If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you so much for waiting and reading, and what do you think will happen next?

Chapter Text

The Serpent's carnations - Chapter 30

    Aziraphale sits at the front desk of the library and Muriel follows him.

    "I don’t think this was the one either" he says "Am I being too picky? I know I have high standards, but I’m trying to be reasonable".

    "I also don’t think we've found the right person yet. But it’s only been a week since we put up the signs, and people are coming every day for interviews. I’m sure it’s just a matter of time. The right person could walk through that door at any moment".

    As soon as Muriel finishes their sentence, the library's front door opens and two figures walk in. Aziraphale straightens his back and fixes his bowtie with a composed expression on his face.

    "Good afternoon, Michael, Uriel" he says politely "How may we help you on this lovely day?".

    "We saw you're hiring" Michael says.

    "Are you here for an interview?".

    "That would be preposterous. You know perfectly well we work for our Lord at church. But we heard you’re leaving".

    "We were curious as to why" Uriel states bluntly "As you well know, the church does like to keep an eye on the well-being of everyone".

    "I appreciate the church's concerns, but I can assure you that everything is okay".

    "It seems quite an abrupt change of heart for you to quit this little passion project of yours" Michael continues "I believe you know what is bound to happen to this library once you leave".

    "I don't think I owe you any explanations about the library's internal affairs. I spoke with Gabriel and he-".

    "Yes, I spoke with him too" Michael interrupts "I'm not sure what has gotten to him lately. Or to you, for a matter of fact. It’s like you’re not thinking straight".

    "Again, Michael, I'm not discussing this with you. Now, if you may please-".

    "You see, I can't grasp the idea of you leaving the library" they say, walking to a bookshelf next to the front desk "Not after all the years of hard work you put into this. There are very few things that may cause such an abrupt change. It could be an act of God...".

    "But if that was the case, you would have spoken to us, to the church" Uriel concludes.

    "Which means there’s some sinful goal you’re trying to achieve" Michael declares, turning to Aziraphale and looking down on him fidgeting with a book on the edge of the shelf "And we can’t let that happen. As representatives of God on earth, it’s our job to get to the bottom of this. So tell us, what tempted you to do this?".

    "I have no idea what you’re implying".

    "Careful, Aziraphale. Lying is a sin" Uriel adds.

    "And I don’t think this town would take kindly to having a library run by sinners" Michael says glancing momentarily at Muriel too.

    "That’s enough" he says firmly as he gets up "This may be a public establishment, but that doesn’t allow you to come here and harass me and my coworker during working hours. If a conversation is all you want, an invitation to church would suffice. Now-".

    As Aziraphale reaches for the book in Michael’s hand to put it in its designated place, they grab his hand. He immediately feels a jolt of pain coursing through his body. Michael’s hands wrap around his bandaged hand, one of them clenching it tightly while the other covers the act.

    "Then consider this an invitation. If you don’t give us a good reason on the last Sunday of the month, we’ll destroy this ungodly library of yours. And if you leave, we’ll find where you’re hiding and get rid of your sinful presence, as well as anything and anyone who tries to stop us".

    Michael lets go and Uriel walks beside them out of the library.

    "I can’t believe those two" Muriel says "How rude of them- Are you alright?".

    Aziraphale didn’t hear a word from Muriel, he was too focused on trying to contain the pain emanating from his hand. Muriel rushes to Aziraphale’s side and takes a look at the bandages.

    "You’re bleeding" they say, mortified "That can’t be a good sign".

    Aziraphale takes a slow breath before speaking.

    "I'll go patch it up. It will only take a few minutes. Do you mind staying here in case anyone shows for the interview?".

    "Of course. Please let me know if you need help".

    Aziraphale walks to his house and looks for his first aid kit.

    "Sinful behavior..." Aziraphale scoffs "Like those two are the prime example of God's love".

    He sits down on the couch and carefully unwraps the bandages. The bite marks had been healing nicely, but they’re still not healed enough to endure those kinds of pressure. The bleeding wasn’t too severe, but his hand was radiating pain with any touch. He takes his time to clean the wound and wraps it again very carefully. He exhales after unconsciously holding his breath. He never enjoys these visits, but he can't limit the entrance to the library. It’s a public building, so he can only kick people out if they’re causing harm or damaging the library’s property. And even in those cases, people are allowed to return soon after. Unfortunately, there’s no major solution to Michael and Uriel’s behavior.

    "What do we do now?" Muriel asks after closing the library for the day.

    "Regarding what, dear?".

    "About Michael’s ‘invitation’. I know this has been going on long before I worked here, but it has been getting worse lately".

    "There’s no need to panic. That ‘invitation’ is purely an attempt at humiliating me in front of a crowd. The church is always full on Sunday. And I’m sure they’ll twist whatever I say in their favor. But if I don’t go, I’m sure they’ll just start spreading rumors".

    "I just don’t want an angry mob barging into the library. Or worse...".

    "Let's not get ahead of ourselves. Nothing has happened yet so-".

    "Nothing happened? They hurt you today" Muriel says, worried "Physically hurt you. How bad does it have to get?".

    Aziraphale stays quiet while thinking of what to say next. Muriel was right. They crossed a line that day. But that line has been crossed many times, it keeps getting further away from where it should be.

    "It will stop. We’ll figure something out. I promise".

    "I’ll try to think of something too" Muriel sighs.

    "Thank you. Now go on, you should head home and get some rest. It won’t help if we’re too tired to think".

    "Do you need help with anything? Is your hand alright?".

    "I'm alright, but thank you for asking".

    Aziraphale goes to the library that night with a warm cup of tea and an insomniac desire to read a book. He closed one of his favorite novels after reading only a couple of chapters. He couldn't focus. It wasn't enough to make a plan regarding the library and his absence, now he needs to figure out another plan for this. He holds his head in his hands and closes his eyes for a second.

    "I hope Muriel has more luck than I coming up with ideas" he mumbles.

    A few days pass by, and everything has been going accordingly.

    "Excuse me" Aziraphale hears and lifts his head from some papers.

    "Good morning" he greets with a smile "How can I help you today?".

    A young woman stood in front of his desk.

    "I saw that you were hiring, I would like to apply for the job".

    "That's wonderful news! I'm Aziraphale" he says getting up and holding out his hand.

    "I'm Maggie" she responds and gives him a handshake.

    "It's really nice to meet you, Maggie. I need to go find my coworker Muriel, but while I'm on it, please fill out this paper. It has just a few short questions".

    "Of course".

    "You can sit over here" he guides her to a table not too far away "Take your time".

    Aziraphale leaves Maggie and finds Muriel on the top floor putting some books back. After sharing the good news, they glance at her from the top of the stairs. When she puts down the paper, they start approaching her.

    "This is Muriel" Aziraphale introduces "They’re my coworker".

    After a quick chat, they head to a quiet room to start the interview. Maggie had moved to that town recently and was looking for a job. She didn’t grow up too far away and actually attended a few library events over the years. Even if she never worked at a library, she has worked in stores and is familiar with the way that library is organized.

    "I used to come here every year to visit my grandmother" she says "I continued coming after she passed, and this time I decided to stay".

    They learn that Maggie has studied music for a few years, and she knows how to play the piano. After the interview, they asked her to wait for a minute while they discussed.

    "I think she definitely has potential. She seems nice and organized. I think we should take a couple of weeks to teach her the basics and see if she fits in".

    "I agree" Muriel says with a smile "I have a good feeling about her".

    "Well, let’s share the good news then".

    They reenter the room and Maggie waits with an anticipating smile on her face.

    "Maggie, we would like to have you work with us for a couple of weeks to start your training and see if you adapt nicely to this place. But if all goes well, I believe we’re looking at our next official coworker".

    "Thank you!" she says, getting up and shaking both their hands "I’m glad to hear that. I promise I’ll do my best. When should we start?".

    "Well, it’s almost time for our lunch break. If you’re available today, you can meet us here in an hour and a half".

    "Are you sure you want me to train her?" Muriel asks nervously "I’ve never trained anyone and you’re way more experienced than I".

    "I believe you’re perfectly capable of teaching her. You’ve proven countless times that you know what you’re doing. I will help, obviously, and I’ll cover your tasks while you’re with her. But I think this makes more sense since you two will be staying here alone after I leave. That way, Maggie will know she can come to you for help. You’ll get to know each other better".

    "I’m not sure if I can...".

    "I’m here, you can come to me for help too. And if you think you can’t teach her, that’s alright. Not everyone is good at teaching. But I think you should give it a shot".

    "Okay, Mr. Fell. She seems nice, so I’m sure it won’t be disastrous".

    "I have a feeling it will go wonderfully".

    That afternoon, they gave Maggie a tour and went over the major tasks they perform. She accompanied Muriel during the rest of the day, she started to see the processes in place for organizing the books, checking them in and out, the event calendar... It was just the start and there’s a lot to cover, but Muriel ended the day happy with the small progress they made. It’s hard to quantify how much Maggie learned since they only worked together for a few hours, but they’re optimistic. She pays attention and asks questions to better understand what to do. And Muriel goes home proud for having been able to answer all of them.

    "I think she’s doing a great job so far" Muriel says after a week "She’s starting to do some things on her own, with me overseeing her work. Even when she doesn’t remember something right away, she always keeps calm and checks the notes she’s been taking. She does it so naturally that no one even questions it".

    "I’m so glad to hear that. I hope she’s enjoying the job as well".

    "I believe so".

    After a short silence, Muriel continues.

    "Regarding Michael... I haven’t gotten any ideas unfortunately".

    "Me neither. I’ll keep thinking. I’m sure we can come up with something in time".

    A couple of days later, the three of them got to take a break as they don't work on Mondays. Aziraphale has been taking Bentley for longer runs on those days to get some fresh air, and the weather was in their favor. It was cold, but it wasn’t raining. On their path, Aziraphale gets Bentley some food and buys a slice of cake for himself in a small village. They stop by a field to enjoy their snack.

    "Here you go, you should have some water too" Aziraphale says gently "I know they’ve been taking good care of you on the stables. You deserve it".

    It was a calm afternoon, but after a few hours, the clouds got darker.

    "Let’s head back, it should start raining soon".

    Bentley had a good run returning to the city, they only caught a couple of raindrops before getting shelter. Aziraphale heads to the stables to leave Bentley before going out for dinner. There are a few restaurants in town that he enjoys, so he takes a walk through the streets to make a decision. That particular evening, he chose a French restaurant. His French wasn’t the best, but he insists on practicing whenever he eats there. After leaving a nice tip for the waitress, he starts walking back home. It was raining, so he tried to find cover as he walked.

    "Should have brought an umbrella" he mumbles, but something stops him mid-thought.

    Aziraphale sees two strange figures talking in an alley, but he recognizes one of the voices. It's Michael.

    "I told you to be careful" they say "They saw you".

    "They saw someone" the other person answers "They don't know it was me".

    "They're not supposed to see anyone. That's not how it's supposed to be".

    "Didn't they still go to church?".

    "Yes" Michael responds, slightly annoyed "They thought it was a demon in their house".

    "Isn't that the whole point? Demons punishing those who don't seek your holy salvation?" they say mockingly.

    "I'd rather keep it as safe as possible. No one can know that it is just a person. It needs to be believable. And less is often more".

    "Not when it comes to my payment".

    "Yes, of course".

    Michael hands that figure a bag with something metallic inside.

    "I also have a few new targets for you. This time I have something different in mind".

    "What is it?".

    "These people all took books from the library. I simply want you to leave some devilish mark on them".

    "Finally going for the library, I see. Took you long enough. What's next? We go for the librarians too?".

    "When the right time comes. For now, I just need people to get suspicious. They'll come to me for guidance then".

    "So you just want me to damage some books? That's not too interesting".

    "If you want the plan to move forward, you'll do as I say. When Aziraphale leaves and the rumors start echoing the streets, we'll be able to target the librarians. Until then, you’ll stay out of their business".

    Aziraphale covers his mouth, unable to move. He stays hidden in the corner until he hears the two people going their separate ways. The last thing he hears is "See you next Monday. And don’t forget my money".

    Without many options, he walks through the first door he sees. It was a pub. A few people were sitting around with a drink in hand, but none looked at him. He strolls to the counter and takes a seat.

    "Need something to drink?".

    Aziraphale looks up at the bartender.

    "Oh, yes. A Sherry, please".

    "Having a rough day?" she asks, pouring him the drink.

    "You could say so".

    "Well, hope this helps".

    "Thank you" he responds, holding his drink "What’s your name?"

    "Nina".

    "You have a lovely establishment, Nina".

    "Thanks".

    "Good morning, Mr. Fell!" Muriel greets him, arriving early for their shift.

    "Muriel" he says, rushing in their direction.

    "Is everything alright? You look like you got no sleep".

    "We need to talk. It’s about Michael".

    "Oh, did you stay up late crafting a plan?" they ask excitedly, following Aziraphale.

    He stays quiet until they’re in a more private part of the empty library.

    "I saw them yesterday" he whispers "They’re- it’s worse than I thought, than I could ever imagine- They’ve been scaring people. Hurting people. And if we don’t stop them, we’ll be next. This is bigger than the library, it’s more than just pettiness towards us".

    Aziraphale frantically explains what he witnessed to Muriel, who becomes more and more appalled with every sentence.

    "We need to tell Gabriel" they say.

    "With what proof?" Aziraphale asks "He won’t believe us. And Michael will find out that I saw everything".

    "Alright, then we show Gabriel. Next time they meet, we will be there. He won’t be able to deny it".

    "I don’t know if it will work...".

    "It will, trust me".

    Aziraphale’s sleepless brain was fueled by anxious thoughts, otherwise, he would be asleep. He spent all night thinking about everything he could do and how it would fail. It seemed to be an unsolvable problem. But one thing’s for sure, he trusts Muriel. They can be a bit blindly optimistic at times, but they’re also smart and resourceful. Together they’ll be able to uncover that mess.

    That night, Aziraphale was able to sleep for a few hours. He stayed with Muriel after closing the library, they decided what the next steps should be. The following morning, Muriel stayed in the library with Maggie while Aziraphale went to Gabriel’s office. After waiting for a few minutes, Gabriel let him in.

    "Good morning, Aziraphale. I heard you have already employed someone new".

    "Yes, she’s still training, but I believe she’ll become a permanent employee soon".

    "I’m glad to hear. Is that what this visit is about?".

    "Unfortunately, no" Aziraphale says, fidgeting with the trim of his coat "I recently witnessed something that I believe should be brought to you".

    "Go on".

    "I saw Michael paying someone to invade people’s houses to scare and even harm them. They intend to make it seem like a demonic punishment, pushing people to go find guidance in the church".

    "If that’s the case, wouldn’t I be hearing about this? People come to me with their problems all the time, I’m sure they would let me know".

    "No one can deny your position in this town, but since the attacks are masked as religious, they most likely feel like being closer to God is the best solution".

    Gabriel stays quiet for a few seconds.

    "That’s a pretty big accusation" he says "Can you prove it?".

    "I know when Michael will meet with that person again. You can witness it yourself".

Author's note

    And here's chapter 30 of "The Serpent's carnations"!! The plot thickens with Michael and Aziraphale, what do you think will happen there? If you'd like to know when chapters come out you can check me out on YouTube or Instagram, I'll be posting there when there's an update. And if you'd like to have early access to the next chapter you can check my Patreon too! All my socials are linked here. Thank you so much for waiting and reading, and what do you think will happen next?